#but obvs knowing how their story ends it just shattered my heart

[noturmuse]

Coriolanus Snow, you fool, you could’ve had it all

[ax-y10]

"Don't Tell Dad, Please?"

In which- Wilbur's and Y/n's daughter gets her period and trusts Y/n to not tell Wil.

a/n: Can you tell I'm slow and caught up in school?? I have a request I'm working on at the moment and it somehow deleted most of it so I'm really sad. Enjoy this ig? Also, this is short as fuck...

Chapter info: Period, blood (obv), self projection (Split parents can suck ass-), afab Y/n and daughter

Pronouns: Y/n- She/her, Daughter- She/her

Masterlist:

Of course it wouldn't be right to send a 14 year old to school when she has just started something that definitely wouldn't be going away soon. But, she still needed an education. Opting for asking her husband, and father of her daughter, Y/n starts towards the door, ready to tell him. However, she was stopped by a firm grip on her shoulder and glossy eyes peering up at her.

---

She had a decent amount of knowledge on what a period was, yet she was still freaked out by the sight of blood in her underwear from the night prior. And she had school tomorrow...

"Don't tell dad, please?" That sentence almost made your heart shatter.

The past memories of having to hide your period from your father, frantically texting your own mother at 5 in the morning, a horrid sight in your underwear. Only her knowing for so long that by the time you were 16, your dad hadn't known until a family holiday. You wished you or your mother had told him sooner, educated him. He had a sister of his own, yes, but she had never told him. Having split parents had never made it any easier, either. Having your time of the month start at your fathers, and ending at your mothers was definitely annoying. You were just glad that your daughter didn't have split parents and didn't have to grow up and learn how to live in two completely opposite households. She was loved by both parents, and you were glad.

"Trust me, if I tell dad, he will completely understand, sweetheart." You spoke, reassurance laced in your tone.

"Are you sure?" Her whisper of panic and fright reminded you of your first monthly.

"Sit down with me?" You invite her to the carpeted floor of her bedroom, patting next to you. She gladly took the offer.

"Can I tell you a story of when your father had to comfort me on my first 'that time' when I stayed at his?" A pause followed your ask, giving her time to respond. You took her small nod as a sign to continue.

"I remember being curled up in the guest bathroom, the furthest bathroom away from him so he didn't see me. I thought it would be weird, gross even, if he saw his girlfriend shivering on the floor due to the stain in her underwear. What I wasn't aware of, however, was how kind and caring he could be in these situations-" A muttered coo from the girl next to you "-And so when I heard a knock at the door and a groggy 'Darling, you in there?' I freaked out. A quiet squeak left my lips, my hand quickly finding it's way to my mouth-" Another coo from her "-Before I knew it, he was holding me in his arms, softly rocking me side to side, slowly calming me with reassuring words of comfort and kindness. And the best part-" A dramatic pause "-I got extra snuggles all day."

Finishing your story, you look to where the smaller girl was sitting, and almost melted at the sight. She had swaddled herself in the sweater she was wearing, her face buried deep in the cotton of her dad's sweater that he offered to you that frightful night.

Almost immediately a small tear slipped from your eye, watching as your daughter used one of your favourite items as a comfort mechanism.

"Hey, Muffin?" Her attention grabbed by your soft voice.

"Is it alright if I tell dad?" A nod of approval and out the door you were... or you thought.

Immediately running into your favourite man's chest, a soft chuckle leaving your lips at your dumbness. "Sorry, Wil."

A hand ran up your back, helping you steady yourself, before he spoke softly, despite the obvious hint of sleep in his voice.

"Were you going to tell me something?" He teased, but immediately regretted it as soon as he saw his daughters eyes stare into his with fear. Her worst fear, she would call it.

"Oh shit... Hey Pumpkin. What's up?" He immediately found a spot next to his child, finding himself on the floor in a matter of seconds, his favourite woman leaning on his shoulder.

"How long were you standing there? Did you hear anything? How much did you hear? Am I gross? Ugh." She rambled, emotions mixed and mixed they were. Sadness, fear, joy, pure fright. She truly did not want him to know but by the previous sentences he spoke a good minute ago proved her hope wrong.

"If you're wondering, you will never, and I mean never be weird or gross in my eyes. You are the greatest daughter I could have ever wished for. And if your mother's story proved anything, I hope it taught you that I will never hurt, push down, or ever think of you differently because you bleed every month. If anything, it makes you stronger."

A small kiss was pressed to her forehead, and a soft embrace engulfed the most perfect daughter ever.

[astrasng]

EMPTY BOX II JEONG YUNHO

pairing: idol!yunho x fem!reader

summary: yunho is your best friend, but he's in love with you. can you handle the love he gives, or you pretend to ignore and satisfy your needs only?

warnings: reader is selfish and unstable, actions of cheating and mentions of heartbreak, VERY slight NSFW but mainly focused on angst.

recommended music: empty box -ateez (obv) we can't be friends - ariana grande

author's note: this is pure fiction, the act in this story is by my imagination and not based off any true events. please do not copy the work.

(also i DREAMED this fic and i couldn't handle being yunho in my mind 24/7 so i had to write it out lol enjoy)

Do you know that feeling when your heart desires someone so bad, that you can’t talk about your feelings openly, fearing that what if you screw everything up. Your heart is so full of someone, that you can’t even call it yours. Feelings are dangerous, but the heart is heavier than people predict. Especially when you’re in love. You're so full of different emotions that it sometimes pushes out the ability to speak or act straight. So it results in you denying everything you feel. Just in order to protect them and your friendship. 

But nevertheless, 

When you hear the other confessing those feelings you feel, it all comes together. 

When you hear him whispering “I think I’m in love with you.”

When you can feel his warm breath fanning over your skin, being so close you can feel his body warmth, 

When you can feel him pulling the covers over your body because you fell asleep one night you two watched a movie together,

It all comes together. 

You need to confess. 

So one day, when Yunho announced that he’s going away on a mini trip to another city, and he needs someone to keep an eye on his house and dog, you volunteered happily. Because what are best friends for? Without a doubt, Yunho trusted his house on you. It makes you feel so warm inside, knowing that he feels the same way changes everything. Although, the fact that he’s going away without knowing how you feel, eats you alive. Maybe you should’ve let him know about your feelings before it’s too late. However, it’s been almost a week since he left you here, and as you sit on the carpeted floor in his living room in front of a coffee table, you’re thinking about him. The weather outside went from sunny and warm to suddenly humid and cloudy as the day slowly creeps into late afternoon. You know it’s risky being in a relationship with an idol, but somehow that doesn’t bother you. The only thing on your mind is being happy, with him in your arms. 

But no use of these thoughts. It just slowly eats you alive, the more you think about it. You should wait for him like you’ve always been, sitting in his house and taking care of his dog like you promised. But no. Something inside you tells otherwise,and that is exactly how you end up standing in the middle of his room, staring at his neatly made bed in the dark room, only the streetlight illuminating the room. It kills you staring at his bed, basically still smelling his perfume he probably put on himself the day he left his house. It’s overwhelming thinking back to those times when you slept over because you were “tipsy” and needed someone who would take care of you. No doubt, you’re friends called Yunho. 

Of course they didn’t know how painful it was for Yunho to pick you up from parties and feed you with warm food and clothes in his home just as a friend. 

Whenever  your friends called him up, already teasing him about looking out for your boyfriend at the time to not to get jealous. 

It made his heart shatter in pieces when you stood in his door, wrenched because of the heavy rain outside because your so lovely boyfriend broke up with you. Saying the excuse that you needed a friend. So naturally, Yunho had enough.

Without your notice, he started distancing himself a little, until one night,you called him again, asking if you could crash at his house because your stuff is still at your ex-boyfriend’s place, still not being able to gather the courage to stand in front of him. What can he say when you’re asking him in a desperate voice, the voice only he knows because he heard it a hundred times? In no time, you were eating his self-made food and watching his favorite movies on his TV. He thought it would be a smart idea having you so close to his body, almost cuddling like a normal couple would, but instead you weren’t together like that. He lets out a sigh when he notices you sleeping deeply, dreaming about something happy because he can see a slight smile in the corner of your mouth. Before he could stop himself, he whispers;

I’m in love with you. 

But that was months ago. And he still thinks it was good this way, telling you he loves you without you really knowing, just so the pain would be lifted up from his chest and heart. 

As these memories flood your mind, you let the tears soak in his bedsheets you changed oh so dearly earlier today. As you’ve been spending your days here you avoided his room, afraid that if you go inside, you would call Yunho up and order him home. You couldn't do that, not when he’s working. But as you spent more time in the room, it didn’t sound so bad. Would he be able to come home? Just because you called? 

The answer is yes. 

Whispering on the phone that you need him home immediately, he left everything and rushed from the hotel he was staying at. He loved you too much to ignore such a simple request. It was you, in the end. But as you put down the phone, you look around once more in his room, you remember back one more time. 

To that night. 

That night, you were selfish. It happened way before he confessed, but just by looking at him you knew he might have felt something towards you. And you used it perfectly to please yourself. As usual, you and your “new” boyfriend had an argument and you didn’t want to be in the same place as him, so you escaped in your “Yunho always got my back” world. And Yunho couldn’t say no to you, not when you were crying in his arms, squeezing his body so close and telling him please don’t let go. It was unfair, really. How easily he fell for you and said yes to everything you asked for. Even when you asked him to take you to his room and make love to you. 

You overstepped something that night, but still wouldn’t admit it. 

But that night, you truly felt like you made love with someone with no strings attached. You truly felt like you were being heard. Someone cared for you,someone loved you. 

You felt his lips tracing your body like a feather, worshiping every part of you like fine crystals in the sea. You looked like a goddess in his eyes, the way your hair sprawled on the bed sheets, your body arching when his lips got lower and lower until he found your sweet spot that needed so much attention. That night, you repeated his name like a mantra, whispering in his ears to go faster or harder, or scratching his back to punctuating your words when you say — please Yunho, make me yours~

And all he said was; I love you - whispering in your hair when you screamed his name around him due the pleasure he caused. He whispered your name over and over, begging for you to finally hear him. But no use. 

Somehow you knew how to have him wrapped around your fingers. 

So why did you ignore him up until now?You don’t exactly know either. 

But there he was. You hear the car pulling up to the driveway, the headlights illuminating the semi-dark living room as you enter, running to the door just to almost trip over some dog toy in process. You shouldn’t be this excited, but you can’t help but smile when you open up the door and run towards him. Your heart skips a beat as you take in his tall figure,wearing a long gray coat as he runs towards you in the rain. He towers over you as both of you stop in front of each other, feeling the cold rain falling on your bodies, but that doesn’t even matter to you. His warm hands sneaking up on your cold face says it all. His worried expression takes you in. 

“Are you alright? Why did you-” 

You cut Yunho off by pulling him closer to you, inching closer to his lips but this time, the unexpected happens. His hands grips your face harder to keep you back, defeatedly putting his forehead on yours. The rain rolls off his dark soaked hair onto your face, making you smile as you look into his eyes.

 “I love you,Yunho!” 

The world stops, it feels like raindrops are freezed in the air, waiting for everything to go back to normal. Yunho feels the same way too, waiting for you to continue to make sure he doesn’t hallucinate anything. A moment passes, and your hair is soaked by now as you watch Yunho’s expression. His eyebrows are scrunched together slightly, his eyes searching for something in yours, while on the other hand, you smile brightly at him. It feels like you’ve been rejected, without words. 

“Can’t you hear me? I love you-”

Instead of finishing your sentence, you grab him by his face,slowly kissing his cold lips to snap him back to reality. It feels unreal to him, really. Too unreal, in fact. So he can’t help but trust his intuitions and pull you away from him. Your eyes widens when you take in his disappointed expression, his eyes still closed. “Do you…do you really love me?”He stutters out, his gaze suddenly glued to yours. Without another doubt, you nod heavily. “Of course.” 

“Do you realize what you're doing, Y/N?” As another moment passes the rain pours harder on your bodies, like the weather knows how Yunho feels too. You make a confused face, still holding his eye contact. “What are you talking about?” 

But then, he lets you go suddenly, stepping away from you as he swipes his hand over his wet face. “Both of us know what this is really about. Right?” 

“I think we should go inside, we’re going to catch a cold. Let’s go have a bath, yeah?” You whisper, trying to catch his hand from his frustrated face, but he pulls away. 

“Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me? How miserable my life is because of you?” 

The words simply slip out of his mouth, visibly not regretting. Yunho should feel morse because of his harsh words, but he doesn’t. He finally feels free saying these words to you, after being used to many times. The look on your face only upsets him more, the clear confusion and innocence sits on your eyes like you don’t know how you played him just right. You really thought you finally sorted your feelings out. Was it a lie? 

“I have been here for you, everytime something shit happens to you, Y/N. I was here when your shitty boyfriends abused you or you had enough of them. I let you use me because I was so blinded by my own feelings. Do you still not realize?” 

His words hit you like a thunderstorm echoing in the dark sky. It makes you more confused than ever. 

“Can you imagine what I had to go through because you thought of me just as a friend while I loved you with all my heart?” 

“But I love you too, Yunho-”

“No you don’t. You just the idea of me being here for you every time you fuck something up. You need someone to clear the mess up after you, and your other friends clearly can’t do that.” 

As Yunho continues, you feel like the world is slipping out from under you. 

“I tried to move on from the fact that we are not meant to be, but you had to come back and seduce me again, right?” 

He inches away from you, betrayal and pain showing on his tired face as he lets out another sigh. Before you could say anything else, you hear the car door opening and closing again, a figure closing to the two of you with an umbrella. Your breath catches in your throat as Yunho looks down next to him, his arms sneaking around the girl standing next to him. 

“This…this never meant to be on a long run, Y/N.” He says, not looking in your way as he takes the umbrella from the girl, her eyes intervening with his as she looks up at him with worry. You know this look from him. He used to look at you like that too. “W-what?” You’re left speechless when Yunho extends his arm towards you, keeping you under the umbrella as he takes your own hand and places it in it. He takes his coat off and hovers it above the girl next to him, his hand sliding into hers as he looks at you once more. “I think you should go home tomorrow and never come back. For the both of us.” 

Yunho loving you teached you a lot of things, nevertheless, in the end, you were just a girl who happened to choose the wrong people over the good ones.

(i literally dreamed about empty box someone help me i fear im oraculum)

[mcl-mia]

//so... i have (finally) began trudging my way through the routes of wh again (done every route prior to rembrant's, sans klaus 2 because i am petty and still think it shouldn't have existed), and i've finally gotten to nox's route. just finished rembrandt's. and like... man do i have Thoughts. so i'm going to compile them and scream into the void. many of them will probably be on rembrandt's route, but that's because.... you know. the one i just finished.

first of all. narrative wise, i ADORE the continuation. i love how they are all in one connected timeline, it really brings such a finality to season 2 and it does, despite having its own issues, fixes what one of my biggest problems with the s1 routes (i.e. self contained story lines that don't connect anywhere). they introduce like, 80% of the cast that you're going to be interacting with and dating for the forseeable future and it makes it feel like a proper overarching storyline actually EXISTS!!! AND THERE IS ONE!!! AND IT WILL SOMETIMES REFERENCE S1 STUFF!!! IT'S SO GOOD. SO GOOD.

-100 points for having the rest of the s1 cast being almost fucking absent though. i understand that like. narratively they wouldn't always need to be there. however. i miss my boys. also -10000000 points for practically no amelia. where's my fucking wingman.

i 👏 love 👏 the 👏 night 👏 class 👏 boys. 👏👏👏 they feel like an actual friend group and shit like this makes me soooooo fucking emotional:

literally this makes me so feral. like, these people are liz's best fucking friends and it SHOOOWWWWSSS. the unconditional love here makes my heart want to burst.

i am eating so much good food lore wise. geography from bith hisoka and rembrandt's routes have me eating so good.

i like the time travel aspect well enough, though i do wish they did a smidge more with it? i'm not done with the rest of the routes yet obv but i'm curious to see if liz gets to keep her time powers. the end of rembrandt's route seems to imply that she lost them because the goddess crystal shattered, though?? status is currently unclear.

this line from mischa destroyed me:

like seriously. what the fuck. this is such a good line. and it reminds me that hugo, vain, and mischa have seen so many possible timelines that exist, and yet there IS one where hugo decides to take his shot. i know they basically have everybody be in love with liz but i think it's especially cute but very cruel for hugo, who almost certainly falls in love with her every time he meets her in a different timeline. just something to think about.

speaking of mischa. i think it's fucking adorable how chica and mischa are pen pals. besties. refined ladies. we love them. idk why tumblr doesn't want me to upload the screenshot but it's really cute.

so. routes. hugo's and hisoka's felt like..... nothing? like sure, they had some Big Picture Plot relevance, hugo's moreso for obvious reasons, but hisoka's felt like a beach episode. really weird.

hisoka's especially felt like nothing. like, cool that they introduce beastmen and , subsequently,the not so cool furry racism (wow i love fe9/fe10). but like. what else did it do besides have rembrandt take his watch back. and some geography. it was a nice change of pace, but the stakes felt so incredibly low compared to the two other routes its sandwiched between. don't get me wrong, i love the ending that came out from it. i LOVE the market idea and i love how it was walter fucking goldstein that sponsors hisoka. i just wish that, like..... there was bigger things going on in it. cute route overall, but just felt a little out of place. also hachi is a 10/10 familiar. would give so many pets.

ok. so rembrandt. i love, like, a LOT of how this route is written, to an extent. it is SO full of lore and dragonkin biology. i also like the overt head-smashing symbolism of rembrandt's magic being called "twilight" - not quite day, not quite night. if i were any dumber i'd call it clever.

so. to go back to the bad. because i think, very ironically, rembrandt is the worst part of his own fucking route. it's not that i don't find rembrandt exceedingly pretty, because he is, and his characterization is kinda... good? but he's just not the rest of the cast. literally the rest of the s2 squad consistently make me smile and giggle like a child, while i'm giving the "romance" a 1000 yard stare.

like, seriously. this small convo with lucious is just fucking great and better than any dialogue liz and rembrandt have ever had:

lucious calling his friends virgins is so funny. you go you funky little dude. never change, baby boy. but this is just soooo GOOD.

there's a lot of instances where they make it a point to show that the s2 cast really cares for liz, and that they are so comfortable around her. there's SO much good interaction and it's so cute... and then rembrandt is just. there. in the corner. losing his religion.

ok but seriously. let's talk about rembrandt himself for a sec. because like, rembrandt is fine. i appreciate that they don't beat around the bush that he is literally going to outlive liz. i also appreciate that everybody else is like, "do not fucking trust him, he is literally the enemy". unfortunate that due to the nature of the route liz is like "nuh uh" which makes everyone else be like "fym nuh uh". overall though i feel like he's just. too bland. which is WILD considering that he was a prison of war for like 1000 years. i know it's moreso that in his route he has (because of liz) finally started to trust humans again, but i wanted hesitation, i wanted DRAMA, a more romeo and juliet type beat!!! that came kinda close to it, but rembrandt being there and basically turning himself in is.... lame. very lame. sigh.

and then we have the incorporation of rembrandt into the main group. like, i love the night class boys SO much. and like, it bothered me a lot when liz would be like "oh don't worry rembrandt, we're your friends and you're part of the group now!" when rembrandt would do basically nothing but exist there. like, he barely interacted with them??? he felt very out of place, especially when the rest of the boys were still unsure about rembrandt. at least make fun of zeus like the rest of us, old man.

also. the plot point where rembrandt met liz when she was a kid, and she changed his whole outlook on humans..... uuuugggghhhhh. felt very unnecessary imo. it's like they just wanted to slap in another romance trope to make up for the fact that there wasn't a lot of romance to begin with. uuuuugggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

this was funny:

thank you for your services caesar o7

oh! and nox's outfit as nightmare is dumb. i know wh probably wasn't getting the greatest budget in the world but like... could have made it, like, so much better. i'll do a separate post for that in a min.

uhhhhhh i think that's all i got for now. i have . more but y'know. more to come.

[katierosefun]

okay y’all i re-listened to the entirety of evermore at like 2 am and went to bed at 3 am so this isn’t really coherent but here we are, qeued up to go,,,so here are my thoughts w/ evermore + tcw because y’all k n o w 

1. willow -- strong anidala vibes. taylor swift herself said something about how this song is all about the complexities of desire and. yeah. it shows. // “wherever you stray, i follow” and “i know my train could take you home” and “the more that you say the less i know” and “wherever you stray i follow” and “that’s my man ;)” 

2. champagne problems -- strong sad obitine vibes, which @kckenobi screamed about to me last night and i wholeheartedly agree. big vibes of having to leave a relationship because you have to and also...just sad. might have made me cry and my heart feel empty. def. something on repeat. // “your heart was glass, i dropped it” and “your hometown skeptics called it champagne problems” and “you had a speech, you’re speechless” and “how evergreen our group of friends, don’t think we’ll say that word again” and “one for the money, two for the show, i never was ready, so i watched you go” 

3. gold rush -- okay big anakin or obi-wan vibes. both? both. this is kinda a stretch but. just the feeling of watching these big heroic figures walk around and quietly wonder about huh. who are they anyways. // “everybody wonders what it would be like to love you” and “i don’t like slow motion, double vision in rose blush” and “my mind turns your life into folklore” 

4. ‘tis the damn season -- big anakin and ahsoka vibes, esp. during season 7 help. all about going back to your hometown and kinda wanting to reunite with someone but also knowing that is a bad idea. yes i am sad. // “and it always leads to you and my hometown” and “i won’t ask you to wake if you don’t ask me to stay” and “and wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles i’m faking” and “we could call it even, even though i’m leaving” yeah i’m not okay either 

5. tolerate it -- big sad anakin and obi-wan vibes, and i’ll explain. idk. vibes of just. anakin mayhaps thinking that obi-wan doesn’t care/love him to the same extent anakin thinks he himself does. help. don’t talk to me about this this is my new exile and it shows because i’ve been listening to this on repeat. // “i wake and watch you breathing with your eyes closed” and “you’re so much older and wiser” and “i wait by the door like i’m just a kid, use my best colors for your portrait” and “tell me i got it wrong somehow” and “i know my love should be celebrated, but you tolerate it” and “always taking up too much space or time”, and @kckenobi pointed out that the bridge onwards is from obi-wan’s perspective after rots help “leave us in ruins, take this dagger in me and removed it” and “gained the weight of you and lose it, believe me i could do it” no i’m not okay

6. no body, no crime -- ngl this is a tricky one. this probably belongs in some convoluted au in which padme and ahsoka snap and murder palpatine or something which. you know. i’m kinda down for that. // “i’ve cleaned up enough houses to cover up a scene” that’s all you need to know *aggressive side-eye*

7. happiness -- big, big, big disaster lineage vibes. anakin and obi-wan, anakin and ahsoka, whichever. big sad. all about having really bittersweet memories. “i hurt you, you hurt me, but we had good memories”. // “haunted by the look in my eyes that would have loved you for a lifetime” and “tell me when your winning smile began to look like a smirk?” and “when did all our lessons start to look like weapons pointed at my deepest hurt?” and “there’ll be happiness after me, but there was happiness because of me” and “i can’t make it go away by making you a villain” and “in our history, across our great divide, there is a great sunrise” gives me so much hope??? mayhaps our tcw trio could....could reunite and have a happy ending please 

8. dorothea -- this is also kinda a reach, but i see this is like the other side of anakin and ahsoka vibes in ‘tis the damn season. kind of seen from the perspective of someone who’s seeing someone come back to the hometown and ‘oh huh she’s different’ but like. still cares about you, you know? which is very anakin and ahsoka vibes season 7. // “it’s never too late to come back to my side” and “you know, you’ll always know me” and “but are you still the same soul i met under the bleachers?” 

9. coney island -- honestly about anyone with anakin. :( it’s just. really sad. destroying something delicate vibes. // “did i shatter you?” and “sorry for not making you my centerfold” and “disappointments, close your eyes” and “but you were too polite to leave me” 

10. ivy -- more anidala vibes, tbh? again, stuff about illicit affairs kinda. cheerful but lyrics are not, actually. idk the metaphorical thing that both anakin and padme are already married to are the order and the senate, obvs. // “i’d live and die for moments that we stole on begged and borrowed time” and “it’s a war, it’s the goddamn fight of my life, and you started it” and “i can’t stop you putting roots in my dreamland” 

11. cowboy like me -- obitine and/or anidala vibes, i know. never thought i would talk about cowboys to them,,,but the vibes. // “you had some tricks up your sleeves” and “takes one to know one” and “we could be the way forward and i know i’ll pay for it” and “and the skeletons in both our closets plotted hard to fuck this up” 

12. long story short -- big obi-wan vibes, also big ahsoka vibes. // “pushed off the precipice, clung to the nearest lips” and “long story short, it was the wrong guy” and “no more tug of war, now i just know there’s more” and “past me, i wanna tell you not to get lost in these petty things” and “your nemeses will defeat themselves before you get the chance to swing” and “i fell from the pedestal” and the transition from “long story short, it was a bad time” to “long story short, i survived” 

13. marjorie -- big obi-wan and anakin vibes. i think this song is actually about taylor’s grandmother but right now all i could think of bittersweet anakin and obi-wan help // “if i didn’t know better, i’d think you were still around” and “what died didn’t stay dead” and “you’re alive, you’re alive in my head” and “i should’ve asked you questions” 

14. closure -- big anakin vibes w/ lineage fam. just. angry ex vibes. of someone who just doesn’t want anything to do with you anymore. asdfsdfs this is ironic but like. yeah. that was the closest i could think of. mayhaps a stretch but there’s some connecting lyrics. // “don’t treat me like a situation that needs to be handled” and “i’m fine with my spite and my tears” and “i know i’m just a wrinkle in your new life” and “guilty, guilty reaching across the sea that you put between you and me” (this is gonna hit hard if kenobi series speculation is correct and we get obi-wan trying to bring anakin back for one last time)

15. evermore -- honestly gives me obi-wan vibes. // “i replay my footsteps on each stepping stone, trying to find the one where i went wrong” and “this pain would be for evermore” and “can’t remember what i used to fight for” and “i thought of you in the cracks of light, i dreamed of you” but then it transitions from “this pain would be for evermore” to “this pain wouldn’t be for evermore” and ladies and gentlemen, we call that growth and hope!!!

[dragqueenpentheus]

Okay no one has to read this but i DO have to write it:

PYROC VS FATHER PAUL

Ya bitch needs an art break bc im getting angry about voices existing as i try to keep myself entertained. Today is NOT a god one for sinking into repetitive line work and that’s just about all i have on the table atm

SO! Im gunna do a little thinking about my little meow meows all fucked up by religion. Just a comparison for my sanity and interests. Pyroc is my baby i wrote him for the first time years ago. Five?????????? Whadda hell. Going on six.

ANYWAY john joined religion because of his trauma. His sister died and he felt lost. He was unmoored in this fishing village and looking for reason looking for hope. Hed had his heart broken and trying to make sense of tragedy on his own was totally beyond him. Thats why his interactions with riley in AA are SO good like. He knows that confusion and he knows the rhetoric that’s supposed to combat it. Only it dooesnt work for riley.

The same sort of thing happens for pyrc, only inverted. Loss urns him away from god and religion because its SO strong in his family and not only is he loosing trust in god, but his kin as well. He’s suspicious there’s mre they arent telling him, at the point of his fathers death. And he agrees to, on the surface, absolutely wholly throw himself in to being the second the family and the village need. But he’s keeping his treachery under wraps.

That’s one of the coolest things about father paul imo is like. That slow unraveling of what is. Frankly. An awful half assed plan, driven by fear and loneliness and desperation and dementia and love. Even VERY obvious things like. Taking down the newspaper photo of his young self ‘slip’ by him. I think, on some level, its DEEPLY intentional. He wants people to CHOOSE this. He wants people like bev. He wants people who see him and are in aw of him beating god. Of killing death. He wants to be worshiped and adored and for people to come to him willingly, no tragedy driving them to his arms.

Pyroc also wnats to be worshipped, but he ALSO wants to do the worshipping. He really longs for an element of almost????? But not quite??? Subjection?? He wants to be shown something and for a Great Voice to tell him, unquestioningly and unerringly that it is GOOD. Full stop. And then he wants to spend his life worshipping it. But this booko is an exploration of how….. no such thing exists. And more importantly no great voice exists either. There is nothing wholly good, nothing wholy evil. His lack of faith in himself once he becomes god is him starting to understand that as well. Thats on purpose baked into the lore. The starting point was ‘what if god was a position and in order to get promoted you had to be a murderer. No matter what’. He understands things are not wholly good, at that point. I onder how long it will be for him to realize they are not fully evil as well?

Bc pruitt does hm hm hm an interesting move. Where he takes something the narritve is very sure to communicate is EVIL no wiggle room just fact. Even if its driven by animal instinct its. Evil. And he makes it, not just good, but HOLY. And god i LOVEEEE that for him i ADOREEE that what a MOVE. Driven by desperation and dementia and relief and ‘if god saved me than maybe i can be good despite loving and sinning and maybe if i defeat god then i will be Thee Good’. SO sexy of him. Im really fascinated by his morality. He seems to have an understanding of the shades of grey in some respects??? But if he had a BETTER one with more forgiveness in his heart i feel like hed have left the church anyway after sarah was born??? Even if millie didnt ask him??? That might just be my own sensibilities creeping in but ….. like he culd have seen her on the weekends. He can do other jobs. Hes straight (??? Not totally convinced of this) he could have just dated her that makes me crazy. LIKE OBV HE HAD LINES HE THOUGHT THAT WOULD CROSS AND HE HAD INTERNALIZED THE CHURCH AND THE RULES AND SHE WAS MARRIED AND ECT ECT i know he couldnt have really but. Thye were straight. They coulda.

Im not gunna do fantasy homophobia bc i think its …………….. Boring. But i think some element of??? The vindlegaurd line MUST be passed along and for that particular rules must be applied. But thats also boring as hell :/ maybe i can work in my parthenogenesis lore?????????? I bet pyroc would love building that spell in any universe. That’s the sequal when he goes to magic university in helsin. But yeah i do like the concept that. Anyone can have a baby thru magic its just a time and energy commitment. Just a matter of wanting it enough together. Every baby is so deeply wanted and its mere existence is proof. Thats dope i love that. HMMM to be decided at a later date when im deeper into the story i think. I still havent figured out fully how and where and why orion is going to be invovled and if???? Pyroc and orion are even going to be romantic??????? Im torn im TORn…….

Thikns about john bonding w sarah over science and learning and starts wEEPING…. Like theres some surity beloved. Its just a matter of uncovering. I think sarah felt that same thirst for answers and hunted them differently. Her faith is in logic and science. I loveeee her god. Every scene w her and her dad absolutely RUIN me like!!!!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW LOVED SHE IS!!!!!! I hope at hte very end she saw the blood as the gesture of love it SO clearly was and not him trying to poison her. God i love that she spat it out. GOD. Thats about being gay, btw. Spits the religious offering that could save you across the gasoline soaked church floor like BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think we as a collective should talk about the possibiites around sarah/erin more. Bc their defiance combined would be. Earth SHATTERING for crockett.

In the future pyroc gets a kid. Ever since that campaign where Enemy ended up playing his daughter im like. How did i NOT know this idiot wanted nothing more in the entire world than to travel it with his daughter. I dont care how or why hes getting a kid. Hed be so doting and awful abut it. He would need orion as a co-parent for the kids self esteem to be normal levels. thINKS ABOUT PAUL GETTING TO RAISE SARAH AND JUST ABSOLUTELY GASSING HER UPPPPPPPP HANGING EVERY DOODLE SHE EVER MADE ON TEH FRIDGE. BOASTING ABOUT HER SCEINECE PROJECT OT ANYONE WITHIN EYESIGHT EVEN THOUGH ‘WE K N O W JOHNWE WERE ALL AT THE SCEINCE FAIR’!!!!!!!!!!! Let these fuck ups be doting fathers im fucking begging. That scene where paul is like. You take ccare of everyone on the island sarah. Its more than being a doctor. You comfort them.

HM HM comfort is such a thing for Miss Bitch like!! He sees it as a Good Thing. He tries to bring it for riley by asking to hold the AA meetings on island ((also manipulation. Obvously also manipulation. I wouldnt have bene shocked if he was slipping the vampire blood into the coffee every meeting either. But thats just a theory. A game theory.)) ANYWAY he sees comfort as hly. The church gave it to him when he needed it. The angel gave it to him in the cave. Feeling safe and warm is HIGH on his list of priorities and what makes him hand over respect.

I think pyroc has lived a very comfortable life in SO many ways, but in none he. Activly recognizes. A key part of his character arc his him…. Opening his eyes to the world around them. Seeing the privilege he has and being like. Wait. This isnt Right. We have to change thi. And when no one agrees ti shifts to I have to change this. With Violence. A little revolutionary <3 it only costs the life of his whole ass family

Thats more fun comparison ground like…… paul is SO much about I know whats right and there is a cost but i AM ignoring it. Like HE KNOOOOWSSSS he knooooows he just doesnt want o See. I’m not sure if im going to surprise yroc with the ……megadeath of. His whole family. Or if it’s a choice he has to activly make. I think a choice makes it more compelling, more layerd. It has to be in the moment though, becaus ei think thats. A key difference between them. Pyroc wouldnt do it.. hed just leave hed peace out and do what he could in small ways. But he wouldnt do his big stand off with god. Hed shrink his goals in order to not hurt his family. Out of love?? Intimidation?? Some instinct wihtin him that balks at the idea of disobedience??? I think even he doesnt know. But i LOVE john becaue he jsut decides to lie. He closes his eyes and says i am being stupid on purpose. I think thats PERHAPS more compelling than good guy coward pyroc BUT!!!!! Thats who he is rip to ths little man. Cant change him now hes a whole ass child in my head. The PLOT i can change. Him….. not without massive character development <3

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MM set my brain on FIRE!!!! Im so glad nano is coming up. I love sharpening pyroc against the comparison of other AMAZING characters. Father paul hill my beloved millstone <3 anyway sorry to anyone who reads this its literally me unhinging my jaw and emptying my brain out. I had to write stuff that wasn’t novel or fic. A little character time down and dirty. I wil NOT be editing this love and light to future me trying to decode this

[a-chaotic-ananas]

GOD I LOVE COLE STEWART SO FUCKING MUCH.

he is such a selfless kid who just wants everyone to be safe no matter what and he thinks he has to take care of everyone and he never ever makes a decision that would benefit only him and it doesn't matter to him if everyone hates him, as long as they're safe, that's all that matters, that's all he ever wanted and he's so damn lonely but won't confide in anyone because that would put them in danger and ruby is his only friend because they're the same in that way and she also understands his demons better than anyone and he loves his fierce little gem so much, he loves her for taking care of his baby brother and making him happy and for believing in him and accepting him as one of them because despite everything he's still so young and he has to hide himself all the time and always be on the lookout and he can't trust anyone and he would do literally anything and everything to protect the people he loves and just ugh

people give him so much shit for the shower scene but the thing is that was the only time he was actually 'hitting' on ruby and that's only because he didn't really know her yet, because that's the only thing that's worked so far, either scaring or charming people. after that, when they became friends, he was the biggest rubiam shipper ever and he was such a goofball (the goodbye scene? oh god i just realized that was the goodbye scene what have i done when ruby kisses liam's cheek and he holds out his own? come on. come. on. a-fuckin-dorable) and when he did jokingly hit on her it was kinda to piss liam off but in that older-brotherly way that is normal, just kinda making fun of his baby brother in front of her and i can't phrase this in a way that sounds how i want it to but y'all know exactly what i mean.

and he takes care of everyone around him, always putting himself last. he wants to be close to people but he's so damn terrified of endangering them, he is afraid of himself (how broken he is when he loses control and hurts ruby? my heart literally broke. someone help my sweet boy). he just wants liam to be tucked away somewhere safe, not because he thinks liam can't take care of himself, but because he has already lost claire and can't lose another younger sibling he was supposed to protect, he can't let liam pit himself in danget if there is a way for cole to do it himself which is such and older sibling thing to do.

he deserved so much better. he deserved to be part of the thurmond hit. he deserved to see the world liberated, to see he wasn't a monster and people loved him no matter what.

but if he absolutely had to go, had to die, it should have been a different way. he should have gone out blazing. he deserved to fight until the end and die a hero. his loss was kinda overriden by the thurmond hit and liberation of the camps and we didn't get to mourn him. they didn't get to mourn him.

and the way the scene was written, the stewart is dead thing, was so terrible. because that way they (we) didn't see it was cole, we saw it was not-liam. cole didn't die, not-liam did. because let's face it, liam was much more of a main character so his death would have been way more impactful and changed the story more, but cole didn't deserve his death to be a relief, because it wasn't his brother. i know it wasn't meant that way and i know it was for suspense, but if cole had died in any other situaton, ruby would shatter. he was her good friend and she relied on him so much in so many ways. but that scene was overwhelmed with figuring out where liam was (which is obvs understandable but still) and his death was swept under the rug a little bit. and there isn't even one scene after the liberation where liam and ruby talk about him, how he deserved to be there to see what his work had achieved, because he did. he deserved it.

COLE STEWART DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER AND I AM NOT OKAY WITH THIS.

[etherealeeknow]

hello. it’s gen. and i’m warning you that below is a longass and useless paragraph of... me crying/pouring my heart out?

(just in case) before any of you go “uhhh why is she exposing her relationship on a skz tumblr fic account?” i have my reasons, skz included. if you’re still questioning the exact same thing, you’re more than welcome to scroll past this! thank you.

tw: bad break up. me being hyperbolic. mention of scars (metaphorically).

—

these past few months have been amazing to me— well, despite my shitty work lol. but really, i’ve been blessed with such awesome and lovely moots, anons, and readers!! 🥺💞 however, /cue thunder sounds and lightnings and all the scawy effects/ things suddenly took a toll last friday night (wow it sounds like a katy perry song but n e ways!!), long story short, i’m on the edge of a shaky relationship.

last year on march, i also went through a bad break up, a bigger one, even, with my two year boyfriend (make it four if you wanna include how many years i l*ved him). this one’s actually nothing compared to last year, but shit still hurts as bad, apparently, sadly, pathetically, lol. ngl i did have a thought to delete or at least leave this account (don’t get me wrong, this account has done nothing wrong, it’s just because i was so overwhelmed, i didn’t know what to do), but i’ve decided not to.

last year on september, skz came into my life (thankfully, i have gotten over my ex by that time and have come to the fullest realization that what we had IS toxic.). still, skz brings so much joy to my life, even until this very moment when i am typing this. i’ve been into kpop since i was... 14?? and i’m turning 23 this year. i took a two year hiatus because my ex wasn’t into kpop (and i was such a fricking simp!!! heh). skz was the first group i came back to and is actually the only group i’m paying full attention to now (i was and still am a huge multistan, but i don’t keep up with other groups as much anymore).

this person i’m seeing, is also a stay. as much as i’d like to think/say it doesn’t affect me at all, i can’t. they’re a stay and we’ve talked about skz a lot, obv it has left tiny, faint scars on me, and— idk, like i said, it’s been really tough and i can’t think straight. on top of that, today’s my first day being back at work after having my five days break and i’m gonna shamelessly admit that i cried at work today lmao (thank goodness we’re working from home and i had no zoom meetings!!).

but as i’ve told you, last year’s storm was bigger, but i passed it, didn’t i? so oBV I AM SO GONNA GET PAST THIS TOO!! eazy peazy lemon squeezy!! besides, there is no way, nO WAY, i’ll let a person who has hurt me to take away my happiness. they’ve hurt me and that’s enough. i’m not gonna let them take skz and writing, and you guys, away from me. i’m gonna get back on my toes. i’m not gonna set any deadline, but i’m here to say that i am here, i am not going anywhere. i wanna be happy. i miss the girl who i used to be— independent and a full time minho simp <3 and this time, i’m gonna be exactly just that pLUS more mature and stronger!

now, this is all so sudden but i’ll be closing my rant? here because it might go on longer and i don’t want that to happen sldkfkfkf since it’ll only be filled with me blabbering nonsense. for those who’ve read till the very end, thank you so much. for those who sent me asks, thank you too— i’ll get to answering them soon. also i can tell you’re probably going ??? at me rn but really, it’s just the stupid effect from my shattering heart. i can assure you i am still gen.

-gen 🧷

[sarunohadaki]

DQXI/The Last of Us Part II Crossover

Crossover week: Home | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |

Enter a fic idea that started because I was thinking of luminerik in a zombie apocalypse when I realized there was already a game I could plop them into! I really enjoyed The Last of Us and, to a greater extent, TLOU Part II, although to be fair I only watched playthroughs of them.

They’re action-packed and emotionally driven, especially the sequel.

More under the cut for another longer post. Content warnings for depictions of violence, death, zombies, that sort of thing. Spoilers for The Last of Us 1 and 2, some DQXI canon parallels, and a potential future Saru fic (though doubtful).

Rating: M. For sure M.

Pairings: luminerik. Some friendships I haven’t figured out yet. Is it possible to throw in a slowburn and have this be an action/adventure fic? Who knows.

Premise: Eleven is Ellie in this, nice and simple. He’s the child who is immune to the Cordyceps virus that rapidly infects a shit ton of the human population and leads him to go on a whole adventure at the tender age of 13 or so.

However, this fic would take a lot from the events of TLOU II, when El is older. I have no idea what the main theme of this fic would be. In TLOU II, it was revenge.

About revenge…

Ellie’s father figure is murdered in front of her, the same man who took away her chance to help the world by him saving her from her self-sacrifice at the end of TLOU. Ellie felt like her life didn’t matter anymore because Joel took her life’s purpose away from her, but she was going to try to forgive him. Before Ellie could do that, Joel was murdered. Held down and beaten to death with a golf club while Ellie was forced to watch.

Ellie must have felt guilty about that— for holding her grudge over an aging man’s head for so long, a man who wanted her to live and be happy. And that just makes her angrier after witnessing his death.

The Eleven I know would never resort to murder, and he doesn’t have the same harshness to his character as Ellie did in TLOU. However, given the right circumstances, anyone can probably break. I just don’t know that I can replicate the same emotions and motives Ellie had behind her actions, or the relationship she held for Joel. There’s nobody like Joel in DQXI as far as I can throw it.

So, yeah! I’ve seen mention before of AUs where Jasper or Hendrik are Eleven’s father figures, and I could see that as more likely than Chalky or Rab slotting in for Joel in this. But also, Jasper, Hendrik, etc., would slot in very well as replacing Abby.

A bit of plot

The fic begins with Erik and Mia foraging for firewood in a snowy forest. They’ve been traveling for years with a posse of older men who keep them around as lackeys and possible zombie bait. You know, because people are horrible. The posse had picked up Erik and Mia when they were barely teens; that’s when the infection had started and the siblings hadn’t had much choice in whether they were going to go with the men or not, considering the alternative was likely death.

Anyway, when Erik and Mia return to camp, they find they have a new visitor! It’s a boy, gagged up to a chair in the center of the room. He has a bruise across his forehead and doesn’t look too happy about the arrangement.

Erik’s shocked at this new development, but it’s not his place to ask questions. Good thing he doesn’t have to, because soon enough there’s another stranger knocking at their door. And they want Eleven back.

Which. You can imagine how that exchange goes. The stranger gets what they want, although not without shedding some blood in the process. It’s not like Erik is one to complain so long as he and his sister are safe, and they do survive the ensuing shootout, despite almost being used as a meat shield at some point.

Eleven urges his savior — a family friend — to take Erik and Mia in, and they relent. I don’t know who saves Eleven. I know Eleven probably lives in Jackson with others who all treat each other like family.

And that’s all I’ve got. The plot unravels from there. The only other thing I have in my notes is obligatory sexual tension, gore, some close calls with the infected, and Eleven’s big reveal that he is immune to zombie chomps. (Full disclosure, I don’t think Erik would feel betrayed by the news.)

More overarching plot

I don’t know if Eleven sets off on a revenge plot like Ellie did in the games but hey, I’m here for that. He has a dark side he doesn’t show the others (Darkspawn, anyone?). That, or he wants to search for another doctor (one Joel didn’t murder thankyouverymuch) to help him save the world by developing a vaccine.

As I mentioned before, Jasper, Hendrik, etc. could be Group B in this fic, replacing Abby. I am so sorry to them if this fic closely followed TLOU II’s plot because that means pretty much none of that team is going to come out of this fic alive.

I DO like the idea of Erik agreeing to go on an adventure with Eleven in exchange for letting Mia stay in Jackson. So, Eleven obvs agrees and lets Erik join him. Imagine Erik unknowingly joining a revenge/murder plot and seeing his new friend slowly losing his sanity as he gets lost in the sauce of killing people. That would be terrible! Particularly if Erik said, “Sure, I’ll follow you while you do whatever” and only later discovers El’s darker motives.

The Obligatory Luminerik

No one ever needs a reason for romance in a fic but by god it was in TLOU II canonically anyway so that’s all the reason I need. Give me two boys gently mending each other’s injuries after fights. Meaningful glances over campfires and tag-teaming to overcome obstacles while traveling together. Give me that sad as all Hell guitar solo with Ellie singing to Dina only make it Eleven singing softly while Erik’s heart shatters into a billion pieces and— agh. If you don’t know how that love story ends, I don’t have the heart to tell you.

(P.s. oh I forgot to mention that El's parents were probably tragically murdered in front of him by a clicker that had heard their noise, and therefore El has residual trauma from it. Might be selectively mute or just afraid to speak around anybody really, to the point that others think he's "slow" whereas he doesn't give a shit what other people think about it and probably hasn't told anyone about the parent-murdered thing.)

[subtlereferencetomyinterests]

The Ballroom

Ao3,  MasterPost

Relationships: Roceit

I know how to write Roman, in theory. In practice, it takes hours to get right. And yet, I love him. Oh! And I actually remembered to insert the italics this time, so, you’re welcome :3.

Warnings: Self-Doubt, Delusions/Hallucinations (they r not that bad), slight Trust Issues (Janus, obvs), Established Relationships, First ‘i love you’, Mentions of Greek Mythology, References to Musicals (Hadestown Hadestown Hadestown!! they sing Wedding Song together ok??), and I vaguely imply that Roman has ADHD because of course I do. 

Word count: 2,443

Every side had a room. Duh, common knowledge. The inhabitants of the Mindscape constantly barged in and out of each other’s domains without so much as a knock, usually to no more reaction than an irritated sigh. It wasn’t like it was a big deal to anyone, much like an actual family. If a trait wanted absolute privacy, well, they always had somewhere else to retreat to.

Thus brings us to the Extensions. It was well understood that you never visited one without express permission from the side who owned it. They were entirely personal settings, specific to the ‘individual’ that used it. The Extensions shifted and changed over time, just as each side’s representation, outlook, and even definition changed, but there had been a certain consistency upheld throughout the last three or four years. 

Roman’s was a theater, beautiful and ornate with a high-ceiling and perfect lighting, which of course always followed him. Logan’s was a planetarium, allowing the user to view any part of the night sky, and providing essentially all known information on astrology for those that wanted it. Patton had a garden, always filled with fresh produce and hundreds of different types of flowers; humble fountains and birdbaths were dotted along the narrow brick path that ran through the large space, at which he could often be found resting with a bunch of chrysanthemums. Remus’ was, predictably, a museum filled with almost innumerable odd and grotesque objects and devices from history- it also served as an art gallery, on occasion, offering a strange sort of beauty. Virgil’s had changed the most over the years, but it had seemed to settle on something of a vinyl record library, complete with bean bag chairs to lounge in while you listened: perfectly fitting for the hipster emo that he was at heart.

And that left Janus. Of course, no one besides the snake himself had ever seen his Extension, and for a good long time he’d intended it to stay that way. It was his business and nobody else’s- why should he want to invite someone into such a personal environment? 

But then he went and made the mistake of falling for just the someone to answer that rhetorical question. Someone who would surely be overjoyed to see it, and whom Janus loved dearly enough to maybe possibly let him.

It was a ballroom. Obviously Roman would love something like that. 

When Janus first began contemplating showing his boyfriend the Extension, he’d wanted to do something along the lines of a masquerade. He quickly deemed it excessive for Roman’s first visit, though. Just a standard setting, then! But, no, Janus didn’t want to have any of his prop people distracting his very easily distracted partner, so that was out of the question. So he would stay simple. Simple didn’t get a big reaction. Simple could be brushed under the rug if it went somehow awry (and was also less likely to go awry). Simple let him breathe.

Yet somehow it remained terrifying. Honestly, Deceit was second-guessing letting Roman in even as he was leading them down the lengthy hallway, feeling regret clawing at him with each muffled thump of his heeled boots on the carpet. 

“I want to show you something.”

“Oh? And what would that be, Loveliest Lie of All?” 

“You’ll see when we get there. Come along, before I change my mind.”

Janus extended a gloved hand, which Roman took with enthusiasm. He was raring to go without even the slightest idea what they were doing. It was a hopelessly endearing quality. 

“Whatever it is, I’m sure I’ll love it but half as much as you.”

“Only half?” Janus teased, narrowly avoiding returning the ‘L’ word, yet again (he wanted to, God did he want to, but the word died on his tongue every time).

Roman didn’t bat an eye at his deflection, merely leaning forward with a sappy smile.

“Naturally; nothing can match you, my dear.”

Yeah, no, he was committed now. This was, without a doubt, happening. Janus continued to lead his boyfriend along the hall, fielding all questions until they finally came upon the door. It was far taller than the ones around it, colored a bright canary-yellow. The trait took a deep breath and turned to Roman, whose face was bright with recognition as to what kind of entryway this was.

“This is your-”

“Yes.”

“You’re really going to show me-”

“Yes.”

“Oh,” Roman traced a hand down the door frame, as if it would shatter at a firmer touch. His eyes were wide with excitement, a grin stretching across his lips.

Janus felt as though his stomach were doing cartwheels.

“Well, then, what are we waiting for?” It was a genuine question; Deceit was open to suggestions for reasons to wait. But Roman clearly hadn’t picked up on the hesitance, too caught up in his own exuberance. 

Janus took a deep breath. He pulled the door open, and the two sides were immediately enveloped by brilliant golden light.

The ballroom was a showy place, which mightn’t have seemed to be the deceitful trait’s nature, at first glance- but, oh, did Janus adore just a dash of gaudiness. 

Roman already knew this about him. Roman knew a lot of things that took a careful eye and a lot of trust. 

Janus took the first step forward, holding Creativity’s hand in his and leading him into the baroque construct. The door snapped shut behind them, leaving them in glowing light cast down from crystalline chandeliers. Above them arched the ceiling, displaying murals of greek myths in perfect detail. The paintings danced and shifted around each other, even moving down the walls, as they played out dozens of ancient stories. It was like an animated oil painting, however impossible that would sound to a real human. 

Soft music filled the ballroom, drifting around the pair. Janus usually dressed his Extension up with fake guests; people of his own design for him to talk and laugh with. It felt safe, reassuring even, to be completely in control of things, including your compatriots. But now, the room was empty, save for him and his real guest. Janus turned his gaze back to Roman, trying to disguise his nervousness.

“Well?” 

Roman crosses his arms over his chest. He clicks his tongue, giving the surroundings a sweeping glance. At best, he’s unimpressed, at worst, he’s outright disdainful. 

“All that buildup, really, for this? What is even the point of such an Extension, Janus?” Roman’s intricately designed shoes clack against the hardwood floor as he further examines the room. He stops in the center, whirling to face Janus. “I’d hoped that this big reveal would make up for all of your other failings as a partner, but I suppose you’re just fated to disappoint me! And it took you months to show me this waste of architecture? Now, that’s just pathetic.”

With a scoff, Roman leaves. 

The scene Janus had unconsciously played came to an abrupt end. He staggered, blinking his eyes back into focus. Roman wasn’t looking down at him, gaze cold and unwavering; rather, he was spinning around the room as he drank in the decorations. He quite looked like he’d never had a malicious thought in his entire life, joyful as he was.

“Oh, Jay, this is gorgeous! Not as much as you, of course- but it is just astounding,” he beamed at Janus, who offered a smirk in return and rolled his mismatched eyes (though he could feel the human side of his face flush bright at the compliment). Before he had a proper response, however, Roman’s gaze caught on something behind him. The trait crossed the room in just a few strides. 

“Is that…?”

Janus turned on his heel and followed, his eyes landing on the painting that distracted his prince. The tale of Orpheus and Eurydice, a colorful-yet-accurate depiction, ‘painted’ in a somewhat impressionist style. It was easily one of Janus’ favorite myths; evidently Roman was a fan just the same. 

“I’m glad you like it,” the honesty was bitter on his tongue. It was well worth it. “I find mythology inspiring, to say the least.” 

Creativity ran his hand along the mural, a giddy laugh escaping him. Without the slightest of warnings, he spun around and grabbed one of Janus’ hands in both of his.

“Lover, tell me, if you can- who’s gonna buy the wedding bands? Times being what they are. Hard and getting harder all the time,” his singing was elated and bubbly, the lilt of one well-familiar with the lyrics he recited. Janus laughed and leaned into his partner. 

“You want to be Eurydice?”

“Just play along!” 

Janus sighed, far too fond for the exasperation he’d been aiming for, and pulled Roman in close. He settled his hands at The Prince’s hips, leading them in a mostly formless dance.

“Lover, when I sing my song, all the rivers sing along. And they're gonna break their banks for me, to lay their gold around my feet. All a-flashing in the pan, all to fashion for your hand. The river’s gonna give us the wedding bands,” once, Roman had told him his voice was honey, slow and sweet. That conversation came back to him, bringing a lanquidity to his singing just so he could soak in the lovestruck expression it earned him. 

“Lover, tell me, if you're able, who's gonna lay the wedding table? Times being what they are. Dark and getting darker all the time.”

Their simply patterned steps led them in wide circles around the room. Janus subconsciously let the jazz that usually rang across his ballroom slip away, only to be replaced with the instrumentals to their ballad. 

“Lover, when I sing my song, All the trees gonna sing along, And bend their branches down to me, To lay their fruit around my feet. The almond and the apple, And the sugar from the maple. The trees gonna lay the wedding table.” 

And so on they continued for the song’s duration- taking their turns with the lyrics, eyes only for each other despite the beauty of their surroundings.

When Janus reached the last line, he drew out the note until his voice faded to nothing more than a lingering hum of the tune. Softly, his standard background music returned to accompany them as the remnants of their duet slipped away. 

They eased to a gentle sway. Roman dropped his head onto Janus’ shoulder with a sigh.

“Thank you.”

“What for, my dear?”

“Bringing me here. Trusting me,” Creativity mumbled into his collar. 

“Of course,” Janus whispered, letting go of the side’s hips to properly wrap his arms around him. 

Roman raised his head, just enough to look Deceit in the eyes. 

“I love you,” he announced, open and honest and completely unexpectant- everything that Janus wasn’t. It was the same way he always said it; with a fierceness as though he was proving his point in an argument, yet somehow remaining gentle and caring. A mere statement, one that never even hinted at a need for response. It simply was, a fact thrown into the world with reckless abandon. 

Nothing terrified Janus more. But, between the duet and Roman’s reaction to the Extension, Janus felt something a bit more foreign than fear welling in him. 

Bravery.

“I love you, too.”

Roman pulls back from their embrace, a cruel laugh falling from his lips. He fixes Janus with a patronizing glare.

“Oh, you love me, do you? You sure know how to show it,” he taunts, backing further away from the snake. There is something dark that glints behind his eyes. “I only tell you that I love you a million times a day, to radio silence, and it’s only now you deign to reciprocate? Barely any fanfare, as though such a confession alone makes up for all the doubt you’ve brought me?”

Janus tries to speak, to make use of and flaunt his eloquence, to orchestrate those perfect sentences to craft himself some semblance of a defense. But all he can do is choke. 

“I don’t know why I ever expected better from you. It’s obvious that you can’t change, Deceit.”

And Roman leaves. 

Except he didn’t. It wasn’t real. Janus squeezed his eyes shut for just a second, blinking them open to see the real Roman- who, thankfully, seemed to be too preoccupied to take note of his… episode.

Roman was wide-eyed, completely still in Janus’ arms. He tilted back, and for a petrifying second the deceitful side thought he really was going to let go, but thankfully he didn’t go far. The Prince gripped tightly to Janus’ shoulders, holding on as if to keep himself steady. He let out a shaky laugh- soft and reverent and nothing like his nightmare version’s cackle. Because he wasn’t that, despite what Deceit’s mistrusting mind would try to convince him. 

“You said it,” Roman said at last, his voice small but his smile wide.

“I’m aware,” finally, am I right? Janus bit his tongue on that. I’m sorry, he couldn’t find the strength to say. I mean it, I’ve meant it for so long, please believe me, also went unspoken. What he settled on was:

“This is the easiest thing in the world for me.”

“I’m so proud of you.”

“Why? You tell me-” a shiver chased down his back, “-you tell me you love me a million times a day.”

“Yes, I do that. I suppose it’s just in my nature, after all. Regardless, it would be wrong of me to expect you act like me, because you’re you. And ‘you’ happens to be someone I love very, very much.”

Janus let out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding. 

“... I love you, too.”

Roman chuckled, bonking his nose against Janus’ affectionately.

“Two in one day? I must be the luckiest man in the world.”

“Shut up, I’m only to make up for lost time. Don’t get used to it.”

“Of course not, my love.” 

Janus sighed- relief, mostly, but infatuation crept its way into the sound. He picked up humming to the light melodies that played, resuming the swaying movements that had been forgotten in the face of confessions. Roman followed his lead, his grin delightfully infectious. 

“We should get back soon,” the artistic trait admitted, sounding very much like he considered it someone else’s problem- one that he did not intend on concerning himself with, at that. Janus hummed, feigning deep thought. He let his head fall against Roman’s shoulder, eyes falling closed as he responded. 

“Just one more song, Darling?” 

“Oh, if you insist.”

“Insist I do.” 

Roman stayed.

@shrimp-crockpot

[roses-ruby]

Would it be alright if your could share your fav angst fics too!!! I wanna have an all nighter as well but some of the bts angst fics on tumblr are a bit,,,, hhhh not to my taste skdkdkjs. Obv you don't have too tho!

ok ok with my limited time I quickly found some small fics which I think deserve a lot of love! I strayed off of stories I felt like everyone has read. I didn’t tag the authors because I am S H Y and also because they deserve better than my dumb rushed summaries 💀 And again since I don’t have time, I didn’t go through my ao3 stash hskshk ask me again the day my schedule opens up and I’ll give you a hundred more luv:

This is how you lose her - Inspired by the male chauvinist work of Junot Diaz. But as much as I dislike Diaz for monetizing female pain for male profit, I love this author’s portrayal of tragic romance just as much. It’s cohesive and sharp, stabs you right through the heart. She’s a wonderful writer.

The Last Exhale - Dude, you want your heart completely shattered? This author spins such a tragic tale of a once happily married couple. A angsty take on what happens to the marriages of those rich, spoiled boys and poor, naive girls in all those Asian dramas once the curtains draw. This fic made me angry, upset and horrified with each sentence.

Nothing but happy endings - Smol but shattering omg. I adore this so so so much. Left me broken at 3 in the morning. A very realistic take imo. If you snoop, you’ll find the asks I sent this author in support~

Please don’t take him away from me - Again, smol. Love how they didn’t villanize the other woman. Based on the song Jolene by Dolly Parton so you already know what’s about to go down. Tae wasn’t that bad in this but still fuck him lmao

Let me stay close to you - rich brat Jungkook who bullied you. You learning how to cope with the trauma. Doesn’t romanticize the abuse even a bit. The way I cried at OC’s character growth. A bittersweet ending. Again if you snoop, way deep this time, you’ll find the asks I sent in kkkkk

It burns, doesn’t it? - Easily one of the best fics on tumblr. Ao3 worthy content oof. A slow burn I find myself rereading sometimes because it is just that good. Can’t even began to describe the depth of this fic, the world this author has created. Just *chefs kiss* Be sure to check out Midnight Circus from her masterlist as well! 

[midyearflowers]

ok normally i dont like looking at leaks but i couldnt help myself with age of calamity and so i watched all the cutscenes as a movie and i have thoughts (heavy spoilers ahead obvs)

oooooooohhhhhhhhh my god. look i dont even care that they retconned botw’s canon getting that happy ending was awesome. like yea im disappointed that its more of a fantasy version than what actually happened but also i didnt have to watch all the champions die horribly and alone so i think its a good trade off. it was kinda expected cause the warriors games arent actually direct canon but whatever. im still absolutely gonna get it once i get a switch (god knows when that will be) but im excited for the gameplay. the demo looked fun, and the story is pretty fun too tbh so im gonna love playing it for myself. i definitely wanna check out all the boss fights, especially the final few

the champions of the future coming back in time to help the champions of the past was a great touch and yes i cried like a baby during miphas section. she gets to see her baby brother all grown up :’) also when sidon shows up going “no you cant take her again” my heart shattered. theres definitely a split timeline cause the future champions obviously mean that the real calamity happened, and they acknowledge that in their future the champions are gone (nintendo came to my house and killed me instantly with the zora stuff i swear to god) them then getting sent back to their own future aka the doomed one was kinda bittersweet cause like they get to see and assist in a victory but they dont actually get to keep that happy ending so its like F

the fortune teller dude never got a name i think, but he wasnt too remarkable tbh. there wasnt really any backstory about who he was and how he was related to all this and how he even came to be working with the yiga clan. or how he got a hold of the corrupted egg guardian/how it ended up corrupted in the first place. so that was a little disappointing but since he died at the end im assuming he doesnt have any importance in actual canon so it was probably just “we need a mastermind behind it all and kohga aint it” kohga realizing that he was on the wrong side and joining the good guys was nice imo. after seeing the fortune teller literally rip the fucking souls out of the yiga members (that was fuuuuuucked up) he knew he messed up and had to help stop what was put in motion. i know most people dont like 180s for villains but i like them so.

holy shit this calamity ganon form was so much cooler than the base game!! like damn dude we couldve had it all but instead we got fucking macgyvered frankenstein spider shit. this form looked so much better, it had the signature hooves and was mostly humanoid like ganondorf or bipedal beast ganon. the red hair was there and the way it was styled i got major demise vibes which is awesome, it kinda feeds into the theories of this ganon and what we saw in the sequel trailer

i still hate the king tho. we at least got him admitting to zelda that he was being an ass but the flashback with the egg guardian having been built/repaired by young zelda and shared with her mother then being taken away by the king seemingly right after her mother passed away (basically the equivalent of taking a childs comfort toy away saying “youre too old for this/this is garbage”) and i will never forgive him for that. no amount of apologizing could make up for how he treated her, especially from such a young age after experiencing the death of her freaking mother. like i get youre grieving and have to prepare your kingdom for a huge threat but maybe have some compassion for your daughter? maybe? just a little??

the way zelda awakened her powers in this story was great too. still happened cause she wanted to protect link but her refusing to run and leave him to die so she can live hit right in the feels. despite having no fighting skills or powers she wanted to act instead of run. anyways i love and stan this incarnation of zelda

overall it was a very epic feeling story and im pretty pleased with it despite the changes they made. i knew not to take it too seriously from the start, its just a fun button mashing game where you take out hordes of enemies at once but set in the old hyrule. i cant wait until i can play it for myself

[vgriffindor]

Elcaminode’s awesome, bookish questions:

Is there a book that you reach for on a regular basis?

Yes! But I can’t narrow it down to just one. I had to steel myself, here, and remind myself that it’s books that I reach for on a regular basis, which is dfferent from books that I’ve read more than once and love! 

Anyways, my friends calls them “comfort books.” The books that I will re-read (in their entirety and also just pick up and flip through and stop at random chapters/scenes/paragraphs): Jane Eyre, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, A Tale of Two Cities, and The Night Circus. When I’m sick, when I’m sad, when I’m bored, when I can’t sleep, whenever.

2. If you had to only read ONE book over and over for the rest of your life what would it be?

Ack! This is tough, because I technically could pick a book I haven’t read yet, so at least the first time I read it would be new! And possibly the best book I’ve ever read! But then what if I hated it? Better to go with an old favourite, (one of the above) so I’ll go with Jane Eyre. Sure, the story is top-notch, but I find it lights an inspiring fire, so it’s a bit of a life manifesto, as well. 

3. Have you memorised a poem/quote/speech? If so, spill!

Okay, so apart from random lines from poems all over the place, which isn’t very impressive, I can remember In Flanders Fields (every Remembrance Day as a kid!) and Rudyard Kipling’s “If.” I had to learn it for a speech recital in grade five, and unlike everything else I learned that year, I remember that poem. 😆 Oh, wait! Also, “There are strange things done/in the midnight sun/by the men who moil for gold.” The Cremation of Sam McGee. Ha!

4. What book from your childhood destroyed you emotionally?

Little Women. I love that book. Ooooh, that’s another “comfort book!” I read it first when I was eleven, and sure, (spoiler alert!) Beth’s death hit me so hard I cried, but the real devastation was when Jo rejected Laurie. I was mad. Lol. It was such a great lesson, though. In knowing your own heart, in knowing you don’t need a relationship, (unlike so many other books) and also, in knowing that a neat and happy ending for the couple that you “ship” isn’t necessarily the best way to tell their story. That whole message was just so powerful, and daring, on in so many ways. 

Also, The Velveteen Rabbit. God. I can’t even.

Edited to add The Trumpet of the Swan, because of course, and Miss Rumphius, which I still can’t read without crying. If you’ve never read it, do yourself a favour and read it. It’s gorgeous.

5. Would you rather only read tiny poems OR 400+ page books for the rest of your life?

400+ page books. Hands down, no contest. 

Kay, I’m going to ADD question six! Meow-how-how!

6. What’s a favourite book of yours that you’d like to see turned into a really well-done movie/TV series?

The Night Circus. And A Tale of Two Cities, and let’s cast Tom as Sydney Carton.

RANDOM BONUS QUESTION: what’s one thing that you taught yourself? Guitar? Hockey? Mechanical engineering?

I’ve been super lucky and privileged - all the stuff I’ve wanted to learn (and not wanted to, lol!) I’ve taken a class/had a teacher. I guess I can say reading? I picked it up, osmosis-style from my parents reading out loud to me. Or I guess that counts as them teaching me? Oh, no, I know - snowboarding. I skiied my whole childhood but was in a car accident in my teens that left me with a shattered kneecap and bad knee, once it healed. So skiing was out, and I missed it with very bad-tempered grace, until a friend told me I should try boarding because it’s easier on the knees. So I went with friends and threw myself down the bunny hill all day long until I could make it down without falling. Which took longer than I optimistically thought! :D

Okay, @elcaminode - I’m turning this back on you and you have to answer them all! :D Plus, @highfunctioningflailgirl who has already been tagged, PLUS @bluerobinwrites, @lulacat3, @hobbeshalftail3469. And anyone else who wants! (If you want! No obligation, obvs.) 

[ithinkthingsaboutstuff]

what do you think Meaghan Rath's character might be like when she's introduced as female Brainiac 5? Will she be good, evil, somewhere in between? Is she going to be from another Earth somehow? How might she interact with Jesse's Brainiac 5? Is she really another Brainiac in disguise? Is her character coming into being going to be a consequence of Crisis? Do you have any other thoughts on her/what she could be doing?

there is a lot happening in this ask (and thank you for that) so lets start with 

What might she be like?

I think they will start by playing her as ‘innocent’ in that she will mirror our B5 with actions and movements but also wardrobe (i think they had the same jacket in one set photo could be wrong tho)

like a monkey see, monkey do, type thing.(and this would be funny as hell)

but as time goes on she might be revealed to be something else

or she might reemerge as what she was ‘before’

that beings me to

Will she be good, evil, somewhere in between?

i think and this is all just my thoughts,

let me start by saying i’m not sure she is meant to be a female B5 (could be wrong tho).

I think going by the title of the ep’s ‘The Bottle Episode’ and so on 

is that she will come to earth and maybe a crash landing or some other complication might lead her to lose her memory or become Rebooted 

so our Brainy recognise that and try’s to do something he never thought possible save his family.

like if she is from his past (our present) he might think this is away to stop his family from going supervillain (or more supervillain anyway) in his time.

so she might be trying to do her purpose (bottle an earth city,)

(side note- I think it would be hilarious if they had a kind of back and forth like.

Brainy: this is National city 

New Brainiac: yes when will be bottle it

B: we are not bottling it    

NB: alright, Metropolis then 

B: NOOOO

like that’s there dynamic at first) 

but as time goes she will regain her sense of self and ‘turn’ on him.

so I don’t think she will be Evil per-say but rather diligent to her programming so its Good to her, but you know bad.

(plus that is some juicy angst for Brainy)

Is she really another Brainiac in disguise?

 like I said I don’t think she will be hiding anything per-say rather she just dose not know she is at first.

and my theory to put the angst dial to 11 

that she is the “past” version of Brainy’s mother (B4)

so this is her before (see what i did there) Brainy was born.

so by trying to save/change her he is also trying to save himself from her actions in the future (but unknowing being the thing that causes it) 

this might lead in the ep’s “Back from the future.”

like the future B4 comes to earth and rocks some shit up.

(but that’s just some fun idea’s)

Is her character coming into being going to be a consequence of Crisis?

short answer, no

long answer, supergirl as a show has been really separate from Crisis when compared to say Flash and Arrow, so having such a noticeable fall out is a big F you to the fans of the show (not that there above this) I think the only thing that will really effect the show as a whole is Lex coming back or at lest not staying dead (and Argo’s distraction obvs). 

so no supergirl has always done its own thing and I see no reason to change that now. (but could be wrong)

so I don’t think she from another earth either for the same reasons. 

this show has always been more about aliens then other earths so to me it would be like if The Flash suddenly had an alien character, other then a meta or other earth character, Like aliens do exist in this world but not what the show focus on.

How might she interact with Jesse's Brainiac 5?  

i have touched on this but if this is his mother or just another Brainiac 

i think it will still start from that place of ‘innocence’  but that will shatter but the eps end.

I think she might come to the conclusion that Brainy is a traitor, but if she comes to that idea on her own or if she is swayed by someone other wise *cough*Lena*cough*   

remains to be seen. (if at all)

so she see him as a traitor but then it could get even more twisted and she starts to see him as just lesser (due to his emotions and bonds with others)

so there’s this idea of 

‘how could a people so strong (Brainiac’s) make something so weak’

she might end up being repulsed by him in the end and if she is his mother this might what leads her to abandoning his in the future as its the best way to punish him 

‘you want to feel, then here, feel loneliness and despair’

so yeah all that fun stuff, and by fun i mean oh god make it stop my heart hurts 

Do you have any other thoughts on her/what she could be doing?

honestly i think i covered that pretty well above. but i will make so dot point on some fun details i think about.

1, Brainiac 5 might be a rank and not a name, thus why they both have it (if they have it)

2, she might have a ship full of bottled city’s that she shows Brainy and is when breakdown between them happens 

3, Brainy may be reluctant to help her at first but Kara might talk him into it

4, Alex is going to activate Big sis mode and protect Brainy or is the first to see the change in the new Brainiac 

5, J’onn can’t read her mind

6, the ep ends with either Nia having a dream about her coming back 

7, or a ship blasting in from the future (but your not sure if its hers or the Legion’s)

So yeah I am so ready for this like I have wanted a brainy centric story line since S3 and diving into his planet and family is just to fun not to think and play with.

(i don’t care if all of this is wrong, i’m just hyped my fav blue boy is getting his time to shine)

plus on a self serving note there is some hope for some really good Karadox moments that are very comic esque, and i am living for that possibility right now. 

also also seeing Meaghan and Jesse act together will be glorious 

[kierongillen]

Writer Notes: The Wicked + the Divine 41

Spoilers, obv.

After last issue's formalism, this one just accelerates. And, as everything in this arc, everything is a big beat. If everything is a big beat, how do you choose what to spend your space on? What beats really matter? How do you pace it? What can be a grace note and what's a scene? That's what this issue, and the rest of the arc, tends to be about.

This issue has gone down very well. I'll admit that while I absolutely gasped when I got paged in, I suspect it's going to be least favourite of the whole arc. That more says how much I enjoy the rest of the arc. Also, as a friend put it to me, I may be allergic to making people happy.

Let’s get on with this.

Jamie and Matt's cover:

There is, to some degree, a "Who hasn't had a headshot cover?" to this arc. As such, Mimir finally gets his. This is a glorious one – the pinks and blues, work really well, and the circuitboards frame it well. Obviously, Mimir plays a big role in this issue, so it is thematic. As is…

Paulina's cover

I just love Paulina's covers, as her being the regular alt-cover artist on Thunderbolt should imply. This made me want to immediately pitch a kick-ass pop D&D bard comic to someone, Xena Warrior Princess as produced by Xenomania. The names of the swords are the chef-kiss, but there's so much to love. The expression is everything.

Page 1

One page scene, with a modified nine panel grid. The one page scene is something that happens a lot this arc. I did a two-page version, but with the right seven panels, we're sorted. Yes, this is all we see of the de facto antagonists of the series this issue – when last issue was all about them, it doesn't worry me too much.

Page 2

Standard music journalist concept. That the second album tends to be worst than the first. Hard to prove, though my old friend Peter's note that "you have your whole life preparing for your first album and have a year to do your second" does seem to imply an easy explanation.

Page 3-4-5

Stealth mission! It's Metal Gear WicDiv!

We actually forgot to add the flashes to the first panel until the very last minute. Monthly Comics is a hell of a time sometimes, stress the “hell.”

I love the determination of Laura in the second panel of 3. That's great eyes.

Looking at this now, that "I can't do much now" is in a panel smaller than 1/9th of the page says a lot about the scale she's working on. The background was Matt in full trippy mode – I had a friend note that this scene is a little akin to Kohl in Rue Britannia 5 (The difference being Kohl is using nostalgia for a performance, while Laura is just doing a performance) but the moving squiggle does remind me the use of optical illusions in Phonogram 3. Bugs in the optic nerve are our friend.

Panel 3 on 4 is obviously Clayton living large and conquering. When you ask for something like "Can you sample the background and use as a speech balloon" you have no idea if it's going to work.

We could have divided the middle panel into two, but I suspect it'd have been less effective. We've seen the trick before. Now we see the same trick, but different. Mix it up. We're performers.

Hmm. I realise the Norns string of balloons is something I'm doing more often now – it's not something I've always done. I'm normally a one-panel-one-emotion, which strings of dialogue rarely allow (as, if there’s any change of emotion inside the string, the image is rendered ludicrous). In a middle shot, and a strong emotional throughline with the dialogue and I'm more okay with it.

While this whole three pages is an action sequence, it's also exposition for Laura's current state. The best exposition is demonstration, I guess.

I mean, the last panel of page 5? That's how cut to the bone we are. Problem? Solve it. Problem? Solve it. We don't need to fuck around anymore.

Page 6-7-8

And after six whole trades, the reunion between Lucifer and Laura. I suspect a different writer would have played this bigger and more melodramatic, but when the reader knows this, a splash feels overkill, especially with the taut pacing of the rest of the issue. However... there are five panels here. That's a page's worth of content, and enough to give an emotional throughline.

Sometimes when writing it's all about trying to find an honest response which is also unexpected. Like, in life, you think you'll feel sad or happy at certain times, but when you live through it, you don't. Or you don't entirely. What other stuff is happening? That's what rings true to me.

Anyway – that's where Laura's Guilt comes from. Laura at her most Dionysus.

And then Lucifer shatters all that self pity with the wink. Did you miss me? Of course, you did.

Page 7, panel 4 is one of those "a comic panel is not a moment in time" bits of magic McLeod always talks about. As in, as we read across the panel time progresses. The Mimir/Cass conversation is getting on for... 10 seconds, maybe? The teleport signatures do not take that long to appear. It's only with Laura's interruption that panel kicks into high gear.

As Multiversity noted you can easily imagine another draft of this with a bigger fight scene. And it's true – but also lying around was a version which cuts it even shorter. Do we need to really give a whole page to Cass breaking out? I felt so. Without the big beat, it feels flat. And it's good to see Cass let rip.

The slight angle on Jamie's external shot with a Norns black/white plus golden thread from Matt is really interesting. We don't often see the Norns as combatants in WicDiv, so this is a rare chance to give Cass a "Hello, I am a bad ass too, in case you've forgotten."

Page 9-10-11-12

Cripes. Going this and making notes I can't believe how tightly we're winding this and (more so) getting away from it. We did all this in four pages?

Two panels to the escape – the right image and a handful of taut captions to hold you between scenes. The first is doing a lot of work, but the second is just elegant. What do you need but the broken doors? Great stuff by Jamie here.

(Laura's captions do a lot of work here in setting up the themes, and the return of Sakhmet's memory to the story)

If you're wondering "How on earth could we get the escape be quicker, it's to take the first two panels on page 8 and move to the previous page. That makes it a five panel page, which is entirely do-able. That's a cost, but it would have bought slightly more space in this scene. As it is, I preferred to cut mid-page and end with Lucifer's first spoken lines in ages.

Once more, a big reveal in a small panel. Chrissy's note on the script was basically hearts for Luci at this point. Like, the second she cuts to the chase and tell s people what to do...

...and then the page turn, and she just goes full Lucifer. I know you lot have missed her, but I have too.

Getting back to Inanna was also easy, the sweetheart... but it all leads back to Sakhmet. That Mothering Invention was as tight as it was didn't leave much room for Laura to think about Sakhmet, or mourn at all... or, most of all, make it clear the story (and Laura) considers her loss important and real. It's an awful sad panel at the end of the page.

Inanna's voice was easy to find again. He's such a sweetheart. Tara is a little harder, just as I wrote her less, but I've been fascinated by this arc in terms of writing her as an actual character. I think one of the ironies of issue 13 was that it put Tara on a pedestal, and the pedestal is an objectifying as any other cage. Getting her back as a character is wonderful, and she gets to be as messy and flawed as everyone else.

Inanna not knowing ANY of this is hard. That's the problem with most of this arc – there is so much information flying around, and secrets some (but not all) are aware of. Who gets to respond to what and when? What to remind people of? What to let slide? Inanna not knowing about Baal is so huge it had to be hit and hit hard.

And then... the bodies.

When plotting this and trying to work out how I could get the cast – oh god, this is not a deliberate pun, but it's also clearly a pun - back on their feet, I was thinking of the Morrigan Gambit. Three heads, three bodies. Perfect. Then I remembered Mimir, and swore. I started to think about how that would be a tense, dramatic situation and how the personal politics could play out and I realised that Tara would just turn it down. I then realised that's exactly how the scene would work too.

(In a "tightness" thing, I suspect in another world, this scene would have been two pages. The "and Tara then just butts in" is the key thing, but you could get the timing a little more intricate to sell the moment more – still, even in this page, I could have extended it more, but seeing Tara's elaboration and everyone else's response to it was just key work for them all.)

In passing – Mimir's glowing in the dark in the penultimate panel just wonderful. Nice work Jamie and Matt.

Page 13

From the Sisters of Mercy's song, Marian.

Page 14-15-16-17

Here's where you talk about spending space. What's important here? You need the scale to show what Baph has been doing – and Jamie turns it into something astoundingly gothic. The use of blacks, the use of light and shade. Just the right level of suggestive. It’s one of my favourite bits of composition in the issue.

As the pantheon are getting back together, this leads to an increase in crowd scenes, which are the eternal artist killer. As such, I'm looking for solutions which only involve the absolute minimum of the cast in a scene.

Thee was an awful moment earlier in the issue when I went – wait! Do I have too many heads to carry? Then I realised I was fine. That said, finding places to put them down so we can have chat scenes was also somewhat tricky. The shelf turning up on page 15 is an example. Clealry Baph planned to (er) have a place to keep heads.

Well, I say, Baph, but it's clearly Nergal now. The road from early Nick Cave to late Nick Cave has been a long way. It's a great shot.

To go back to the space, why spend it on this? We’re reintroducing Nergal and Morrigan, and we’re also showing the scale of them in the plot, and the actions of Nergal. Where we go with the bodies is such a big beat, it needs to come from something similarly large. That’s also the reason why so much (relative in the issue) space is spent on the Morrigan/Nergal scenes. Of course, it’s also a key scene for this subplot, so demands space for that. It’s rarely just one reason. Probably a useful time for my usual “these notes are only ever a selection of thoughts.”

This is also a serious pose panel by Jamie.

The “I could bring her back.” He’s an underworld god too. If she could do it, he could. This is something which I suspect some people thought implicit in the old scene, but the final manipulation of Morrigan is unpacked at length in the nine panel grids.

Nine panel grids are a natural rhythm for this – when I was planning the later bit the triple-goddess of it made obvious sense, so it expanded to the whole scene. Also, the cropped image reduces the possibility of a Jamie crowd scene.

I always thought that, given the amount of time the various characters get on film, Ladyhawke could more accurately be called Blokeywolf. I digress.

Page 18-19-20

As said earlier, the triple-goddess to nine panel grid is one of those natural ways to give a stress to each of the elements. You’ll notice the clicks are left then right then centre. I’d originally written it as left to right, before – after Chrissy’s Editorial urging – rewrote to end with the Macha section to go last. Gentle Annie may have been the kinder part of Morrigan, but Macha was the part he mostly dated.

Then, in a moment of weirdness, Jamie actually drew it in the original order, despite never having seen that script. Morrigan has powers, as does the logical necessity of a left to right panelling order. As a nine panel grid, just moving panels around to fix it is easy. Hail grids!

Like most of the big acts of magic, it’s all about emotional sense than anything else. Hence, it is inevitable as Nergal actually does this, the bleak temple he’s constructed starts to crumble. And, in perhaps the most ludicrous bit of me in the comic, The Temple Of Love Is Falling Down. Too much is the bare minimum.

Jamie’s triple-portrait of the Morrigan is pretty startling. I have no idea if Jamie will miss drawing Badb’s hair, but I’ll miss seeing it.

Re-reading this now I’m struck by how low-key it is. That was always part of WicDiv’s magic – the finger click, and then things happening. The Morrigan transformation was usually drawn to be instantaneous – one panel Macha, the next Badb and so on. This kind of keeps to that.

And then… the reveal. That the new bodies isn’t a splash page says everything about this issue, but it still gets the punching the air moment. We had to have one of those eventually. Lucifer in a black suit is one of the things I’ve been waiting as long to see as Nergal in his. I giggled with glee at seeing this. Jamie’s worked in elements of the Morrigan into each of the gods – Lucifer’s red hair is the most obvious one, but Gentle Annie in Inanna and Macha in Mimir also have their notes. Inanna’s netting top is the main one – and note the shapes on Mimir’s armour changing to mimic Macha’s.

Yes, writing Lucifer remains fun and easy. I recommend it to everyone.

Page 21-22

In terms of seeing chat, people responding to the small details in the issue is one of the bigger joys. That Jamie got the Inanna/Nergal hug in the background of this exchange between Laura/Lucifer/Cass is absolutely wonderful. Laura and Cass have come a long way.

This is arguably a small cliffhanger – the smallest of this arc, at least. However, it sits on the weight of the rest of the run. We’re promising a solution to one of the larger mysteries in the run, and I suspect we get by on that. Note how space is used – this is a dense panel layout, but we go to a thired of a page for Laura’s “I know how to end this” (so giving it weight” and then going to three panel page for the conclusion (which adds weight to each of these beats.) Jamie takes the framing to tight on Cass for the beat as well to sell it. Note Matt with the Norn-colouring creeping in – and how it goes from the fires in the first panel to this is just a joy.

Page 23

Interstitial, and obvious reference to the Jay-Z record, but everyone is just excitedly clapping over the adding stuff to the godwheel. Sergio outdid himself here. It’s certainly an example of how you can have storytelling and even hero-shot audience-cheers beats out of things entirely unlike a traditional comics panel. After all these issue,s we get to see something added to the godwheel. Of course people cheer. That said,  as I said to a friend, “Of all the things I’ve found to torture the WicDiv readership, hope is the cruelest of all.”

EDIT: Actually, I messed up here - Jamie did the tweaks. Nice work Jamie!

And that’s it. Next up – 42, wherein questions are answered. In passing – the letters we’ve been getting are amazing. I’m going to try and cram as many as I can in the issues to come, but issue 44 will be our last one with a letters page. So that’s a timelimit if you wanna try and get in. It’s wicdiv@gmail.com.

Thanks for reading.

[if-i-ever-was]

‘tis me. 

SO, where do I even begin? I know I’d already read the first two pages, but they were so amazing and full of emotion that of course I had to read them again before diving in fully into the last chapter of that masterpiece. When you told me about the idea, I already was hooked and I could picture it all, and you had all these little ideas that throughout the course of this story I’ve seen you put in in a way that was always a million times better than I could have ever imagined. I knew this would be so wonderful and that we were all going to enjoy it and it makes me so happy that you’re getting the recognition you deserve. Even though I knew how it was going to end, the beginning of the chapter had me shook, I was already so emotional in the last one, but this one messed me up even more. The way they’re so careful with each other, “as if everything they’d built up that weekend was delicate enough to shatter with one false move", that was so good. It’s so difficult to write such raw and real emotion and to not fall into writing it poetically but the way it’s really authentically felt and you did that so well that it made me really emotional too. Everything that goes through their heads is so natural and it makes perfect sense and is very relatable and real and honest. 

I’m in love with the way they’ve impacted each other, I love how there are little smutty thoughts because they just can’t resist each other - also very relatable. I am so emotion at the hug, the kiss, it was all too much, I might have liked the hug even more than the kiss (not that the kiss wasn’t wonderful) but the way that you described the hug had me so weak and made it so easy to imagine what it would be like to hug him, I am weak. The way she kissed him though, Lola is a true icon, it was so hot and good and urghhh, I have no words. When she looks at him to take it all in, he is so fucking hot, I cannot handle it. His stupid game of the countdown and then all the lines added something even more special to this chapter, so nostalgic, it was perfect and made me want to reread it all and just shows how much they’ve actually experienced with each other. 

Okay. I knew he was going to do it. I knew it was going to happen. And yet … how dare he??? I knew all along from the first few chapters but how dare he??? I’m still so mad at him, he’s such a fucking idiot!! The way he leavs her is clever, and at the same time, it broke my heart. My poor daughter! With all the descriptions there is honestly nothing that you could have missed, it was all there and so wonderfully detailed and I just could picture it all so vividly as if it were happening to me - I’ve been anticipating this chapter so much and I wasn’t disappointed.

And then he’s out of breath because he’s an IDIOT!! He deserves that swat on the chest because he’s a true idiot, Lola voicing what we’re all thinking, he is an idiot!!!! I repeat - an idiot! The way he convinces her though, her struggle is so real and I know it was hard to execute, to have it make sense for them to be so close after such a short amount of time together, but it felt like half a lifetime and it’s the only natural way to go from here, there was nothing strange about it, they say and see it for how it is and it makes perfect sense. Her conditions are so good, I was really looking forward to that bit, it’s so typical of her and I love the way Alex always predicts her reactions to everything. 

They’re such soft and happy idiots. I am a happy idiot. This story was a true masterpiece, once again you captured Alex so well, he is so easy to imagine and it’s so uniquely him and I adore that so much when you write him. I am so proud of you for this story, I know it’s your baby and I know it’s not over and I’m so excited for the one shots and that different side to them that’s not under the roof of the hotel, I cannot wait! But I’m also excited about you focusing on Izzy and Alex and everything else you have planned, I just want you to keep writing and keep writing with me and stay as wonderful as you are. You’re so inspiring and wonderful and I don’t know where I’d be without you. You’re my inspiration. I love you so much! 🧡💝💓💛🐢💕

It’s you! 

Here we go. You really didn’t need to do this, babe. But I love you so much for it. 

Doesn’t it seem like years ago that I had that first idea randomly out of nowhere? I’m so glad you pushed me to write it. You’re so kind. I cannot thank you enough for simply being happy for me? It’s such a warm feeling knowing you’re proud and support me endlessly. I’m so glad that it comes across as I intended, they really are so delicate and scared to make a wrong move and that’s part of their charm and chemistry, I think. I’m sorry for doing you an emotion, but so so glad you think it’s authentic and real in the way I write their feelings (my double scorpio ass deffo helps). It’s so easy to rush it to get to the drama but the pace for this one had to be different, you know?

It definitely obvious they made a different to each other and that’s so special to me. Reading over the first chapter they’re like slightly different versions of themselves and they just brought out the best in each other. Their tiny little smutty thoughts are so entertaining to add, because it’s so relatable. That’s so cute, because hugs are so hard to write well! She looovvesss that control but also wants his to ruin her at times (libra bish) so yesss, she is an icon. He is unbelievably hot, it just doesn’t get boring. Nostalgia was exactly what I was aiming for.

I know I know I know. How dare he???? It’s always been the plan and I am so glad it still made sense and I get why he did it (obvs because I wrote him doing it) but it was still rude. I was furious. He really is being a smart boy but at the same time, he isn’t.  I know, my daughter just left there is such a haunting image. Glad the details weren’t overbearing, I did my best to make it seem like A LOT to handle though. YAY FOR NOT DISAPPOINTING YOU! That was my only goal haha. 

Out of breath baby!! Idiot is officially HH canon, we love!!! Do we like him??? I am so glad that it comes across as genuine, their reasoning and everything. I was so stressed about it seeming forced but you’ve reassured me that I made it work. You’re right, it was the only option. It is typical of her to make a list, and yes he really does know what she’s going to say and do, it’s my fave thing.

They’re so soft and happy at the end, correct. You are my favourite happy idiot. I captured him well? Shook? Never mentioned it before? Haha, no I’m kidding, I love that you think and say that every time because it’s the most impressive compliment for a fanfic writer to receive. It’s a joy to capture the essence of Alex Turner. Thank you for being proud, it makes me so proud to make you proud. It is my baby. It’s so exciting haha! You are so fucking kind to me. Izzy and Al coming up, Evie and Al coming up too. I 100% promise to keep writing as long as you do too, you and me till the end, babe. You’re my rock, my writing partner and my inspiration. This blog wouldn’t exist without you, HH is fully dedicated to you. I love you 💞💞💞💞💞