#but not our literal population demography lol

[spookygalpal]

i think this isn't a fair equivalence. the acronym 'LGBTQIA+' describes a population/demography. there is no reason to include heterosexual, cisgender, and dyadic (aka, not intersex) people under an umbrella that describes sexual and gender minorities even if they support us.

A stands for aromantic, asexual, and agender. i also came of age/was a teen during the years you mentioned, and even in my high school GSA, a common refrain was "A = ace/aro" (agender or any trans identities weren't really talked about at all in my community at the time).

but that's why it was a GSA: gay straight alliance. it was a physical space / community that actively included allies - many of whom, like myself, attended thinking we were 'straight' but really looking to explore our sexuality/gender. and yes, i also did day of silence as an 'ally'. but that's because it was an event put on by the GSA, not because i was an (out) part of the 'LGBTQIA' community.

i think the same thing goes for bars, pride parades, meet-ups, clubs, etc... you have to welcome 'allies' into your space who may not be out yet for whatever reason (and also sometimes to support their out friend/family member/partner). allies should be welcome to join us (as long as they're behaving respectfully, unlike that straight woman who invited a predatory straight man to the cubbyhole in NYC because 'her lesbian friend invited her first'). you never know who is an 'ally' or who is actively exploring what it means to be LGBTQIA+, so we should always include them in our communities.

but as part of our demographic label? no way.

and if this doesn't drive the point home to you, do you think 'allies' should be able to mark that they are 'LGBT' on demographic information for colleges and universities? for workplace / federal diversity surveys? for eligibility for grants and scholarships? when they fill out medical questionnaires? because i don't. and that's what that terminology is used for - describing our population. while they don't ask that information on the US census, the government and other bodies still have done surveys to assess the 'LGBT' population to see how we are growing/changing over time and allocate resources towards us. in no way should cis/straight/dyadic people be included in our demography for being a decent human - because then ideally 100% of the population would be 'LGBTQIA+'.

The A in LGBTQIA+ stands for aromantic, asexual and agender. It will never stand for ally. Being an ally should be basic human decency. You don’t get a gold star for being one.