#but it is also because i am remembering now how normal and insufferable my irls are | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

def-initely-soul · 7 years

Note

ohhhh okayokay so like im doing this irl but can i request a jackson fluff (???) where reader and him go to a nearby marching band practice and do a trunk or treat for the band kids cause they have practice on halloween???

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees

Bias: Jackson from GOT7

Genre: Fluff

Words: 1.9k

“I can’t believe I have to do this with you of all people…” you mutter begrudgingly as you get out of the car and walk to the trunk. Opening it only to reveal a creepy set up of a haunted house. Creepy little paintings and fake cobwebs hang around the little space, that both you and Jackson decorated together.

And honestly, you’d rather eat a living spider than doing this with Jackson. The guy is insufferable and to be honest it’s his fault that you ended up doing this on Halloween instead of staying home like you intended.

All because someone couldn’t keep it in his pants.

Long story short your dorm room is right next to a girl’s that Jackson is doing a project with. And let’s just say working on a project wasn't what they were doing. After hearing a lot of things you didn’t want to well past midnight you finally snapped and began yelling at them to shut up.

And instead of reprimanding him and the girl for being inappropriate, the security punished you and him for fighting at 3 am in the morning.

Which to be honest is normal cause both of you were yelling in the middle of the hallway, but come on! None of this would’ve happened if they weren’t so freaking loud!

Your best friend had smiled knowingly when you told her what happened, the cause being the little crush you had on him the previous year. You had cut her off immediately since now the only emotion the boy managed to give you was disgust.

And now, you are stuck with him, doing trunk-or-treat for the marching band kids because they have practice on Halloween. That was your punishment.

Jackson sighs as he gets out of the car and follows you. “Here let me help you-”

“I can do it myself,” you say sharply before he gets to take the candy out of your hands and you pour them into the bowls. Jackson goes to grab the little paper bags you have for giving the kids and when he turns to look at you, his eyes are wide and wary.

“Are you still mad at me?”

You scoff and turn to look at him with raised eyebrows. “Really? What did you think I would be? Thankful that I’m spending my Halloween with someone I don’t like?”

“Well, did you have any other plans?” he asks, completely ignoring the part where you said you don’t like him.

You freeze at that before answering, “Well, that’s completely irrelevant-”

“So, no?” he continues, his gaze full of mischief as a smile takes over his lips.

You turn to look at him ominously but his expression doesn’t change. You ignore him and turn your attention to rearrange the bowls of candy in your trunk.

“Well, maybe you can to a party with me afterwards, since you don’t have anything else to do,” he says cooly, looking at his nails indifferently.

Your face is full of disgust while you answer. “I’d rather get straight C’s in every course that exists than go to a party with you,”

“Whoa, then it must be serious since you’re willing to compromise your grades just to miss a party? Do you hate fun that much?”

“No, just you,” you reply immediately, not missing a beat, while Jackson’s eyes grow.

“What? Why? What did I do?”

“Come on, we’re here because you couldn’t keep your dick in your pants,” you say dismissively.

“Excuse me?!” Jackson replies, voice incredulous.

“Oh please, don’t act so surprised! Why did I think I was yelling at you at 3′ o clock in the morning?”

“You think we had sex?!” he asks again, eyes wide with surprise.

You look at him with raised eyebrows.

“We didn’t! She just asked for a massage!” he raises his hands in the air, tiredly.

“That’s the best excuse you could come up with?” you ignore him, rearranging the decorations.

“It’s not an excuse! We didn’t, you must believe me!”

“Why do you care so much if I believe you or not?” you turn to him, eyes furious and irritated, only wanting to make him shut up cause you can’t relive that night again.

As soon as you face him though, his angry face falls and he stares at you lost with no answer. His eyes are wide, glued to you and then you realize he’s standing too close.

Your annoyance dissipates from the closeness between the two of you, and you suck in a breath. Why is he this close? God, it’s not helping to get over that crush. Especially when his eyes glimmer as they look at you.

But then the first kids start emerging after their band practice and you look away awkwardly. Jackson takes a step backwards as he rubs his neck and moves to put candy in the paper bags.

For the rest of the night, you don’t talk much. Only what’s necessary for you to work, but besides that nothing else.

But you observe him. He’s not that energetic as before and for the first time since you met him, he is serious. Like he matured in a matter of hours, taking care of the little kids that came for candy. He’s considerate and kind towards them and funny. But not slimy funny like you’ve gotten used to seeing in him, but actually funny. You barely keep yourself from laughing every time he says something funny to those kids and slowly you begin to remember why you liked him before.

He doesn’t remind you of that fuckboy you’ve gotten used to seeing every day on campus. And you realize that now he looks awfully comfortable. And more himself.

That’s when you also realize you’re staring. And you realize it only because Jackson turns to look at you as well.

You look ahead immediately, feeling your cheeks flushing and you return your attention back to the kids. You hear him chuckle but he doesn’t say anything. You turn to pick up the empty bowls of candy that rest on the back of your trunk after successfully giving all the kids their rightful candy.

Then you try to calm down, looking at the field in front of you, you see a little boy you’ve just given a paper bag full of candy. There is a group of four, slightly older boys that take away his paper bag and shove the little kid to the ground. The kids disappear as soon as the boy meets the grass.

You begin to move towards it, but then you see someone pass by you to walk towards the kid and you recognize Jackson’s back.

You stay frozen, as Jackson kneels down to the kid to help him up. He stays crouched down while the kid stands up, barely passing Jackson’s head in height. Jackson asks him something to which the kid nods in agreement. Then Jackson ask something else and the kid looks down, with heavy eyes and he nods again.

Then you see Jackson taking a breath and walking back towards the car. You observe him, not saying anything as you see him take out another full paper bag and walk towards the kid again. The boy looks at him with wide eyes to which Jackson smiles and passes him the paper bag.

The kid gives him a radiant smile as he takes the paper bag and then he gives Jackson a quick hug, before dashing off to go home.

When Jackson comes back you look at him curiously. Right before you began handing out candy to the kids, you both got your share of candy in two small paper bags. And if you’re right, Jackson just gave that little kid his.

“That was really sweet...” you allow your voice to come out as a whisper and Jackson turn to look at you stoically.

Then he shrugs. “It was the right thing to do,” he replies calmly but then he bites his lips. Jackson is adamant about his candy, never giving it to anyone so you know he did a pretty great thing.

“And are you sure you won’t miss your candy?” you ask teasingly.

Jackson gulps nervously, as he looks at the direction the kid took. “Nope. Won’t miss it.”

“Not even the Reese's?”

He gulps again. “Nope,” he says again with a small voice.

You smile deviously, deciding to tease him a bit. “Ah, I was thinking to give you my Reese's but since you won’t miss them...” you say, pulling up your paper bag and taking out a buttercup to shake it in his face.

Jackson’s eyes widen and his mouth hangs open as he looks at the candy in your hand. You smile again and you throw it at him. He catches it with a swift movement of his hand.

“Here...” you smile sincerely.

“Thank you,” he replies, his eyes glued to the candy and he opens it immediately, to munch on it.

You chuckle as you begin eating the rest of your candy.

You end up giving him half of your candy and while you eat it, you make small talk that slowly turns into an intimate one. You talk about various things, about lectures, about hobbies, about family and friends. About anything really. And you realize slowly your opinion on him had been completely wrong.

And somewhere in this conversation, Jackson tells you that he never really had sex with that girl. She indeed had asked for a massage, but as soon as Jackson did it, she started moaning like crazy. Something that weirded him out but he thought nothing of.

At that point you began laughing hysterically, yelling that he’s an idiot for not seeing that the girl liked him.

After you both finish your share of candy, Jackson turns to you, faking seriousness.

“Okay, so now that we ate our candy, how about going to eat some real food instead?” he asks, pretending to be serious but you see the edges of his lips fighting to not turn into a smile.

You choke on a laugh before replying. “Didn’t you have to go to a party?”

But now he smiles. “It’s not gonna be much of a party, to be honest...”

You bite your lip, smiling before nodding at him. “What are we gonna eat?” you ask.

Jackson’s smile turns into a smirk as he shuffles closer. “I have a couple of things in mind...”

You raise one eyebrow at his attempt at flirting and he laughs. “Sorry, sorry, how does pizza sound?” he asks, eyes wide like a puppy.

You smile back, as his face gets closer to yours. “That sounds perfect...” you whisper as your eyes fall to his lips.

He notices that and his smile turns into a smirk again. His eyes falling to your lips too.

“Jackson?” you ask tentatively, after a few moments when he’s still just looking at you.

“Yes...?” he replies softly, his hand brushing a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Are you gonna kiss me or not?”

The last thing you see before closing your eyes is his smile as he leans in for his lips to touch yours.

#noonanet #kpoptrashtag #kwriterskollection #Jackson #Jackson GOT7 #GOT7 #Jackson Fluff #Fluff #GOT7 fluff #Trunk-or-Treat #Halloween Drabbles

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nora-reads-homestuck · 8 years

Text

Nora Reads HS Part 68

Pages 6154-6184

Hey guys! Some quick background on why I’ve been a little scarce: I’ve mentioned a personal project that’s been eating into my free time, and that is... dun dun dun, a custom 5e D&D campaign I’m running IRL! The campaign is just starting, so I’m in the phase where I’m planning out a lot of details and building locations, etc. What that means is that sometimes I’ll need to take little breaks from liveblogging to work on the game, and other times, I’ll put D&D to the side to focus on liveblogging! I haven’t disappeared or anything like that, and once the campaign really gets going, my need to take short breaks should ease off. No need to worry! I am here and ready to find out what’s up with this robot bunny that young Bro has built Jane. *Seinfeld music* Does the auto responder have a connection to it the way he has a connection to the brobot? Does it fight with Jane? Is it... touchy feely?

Let’s... find out. Eurgh.

*click*

Poor poppop's severed head got nicked by the FIREPLACE POKER.

OH SHIT. I’m so accustomed to seeing damaged eyes that it didn’t really register the first time I looked at this panel. Is this Hussie teasing us with the idea of a Poppopsprite? Because I would be PERFECTLY OK with that eventuality. Circumstantial simultaneity.

Also, damn, check out all those Astaires.

Jane: Put head back.

You stick the poker down his neck hole and jam the head back on the spike as a temporary measure. That looks somewhat more respectable you guess.

THE PERFECT CRIME.

Looks like the troublemaker's father is calling.

That choice of language is weird and it’s skeeving me out. I DUN LIKE IT. On the other hand, yay, more kidchat! Or... robokid chat?

KID SIGHTING. And... well, he looks exactly as expected. He appears to be standing on the roof of his building, surrounded by... fucking... are those doves?

TT: Why have you activated dear, sweet Huggy Bear. TT: Are you in danger?

...I... it’s gotta be Snoop Dogg Huggy Bear, right?

TT: I disabled the AR for now. GG: Ok. Just making sure! GG: Jake was having some issues with it earlier, and I don't think he received its obfuscating tendencies in the humorous spirit intended. TT: Yes, I'm catching up with the situation now. GG: Oh, so you're talking to Jake then? TT: Nah. Just reading their chat logs.

Why does this seem weird and intrusive if the ‘AR’ is basically fucking him? (Haa haa.)

TT: Its demeanor leaves something desired though. I'd prefer it didn't make such aggressive and repeated claims of fidelity to my persona. TT: Be misrepresentin' hells of key subtleties, yo.

‘Subtleties’. Sure.

TT: Jake needs to be more skeptical. Rather than take a Pollyanna jackknife ass-first off whatever turnip truck is blowing through town that day, he's got to apply more critical reasoning to shit. TT: I keep telling him. TT: I keep telling him, dude, you got to be more like Jane. GG: These lectures I presume are roughly similar in complexion to those I'm familiar with? GG: Those wherein I have, and I quote, "got to be more like Jake?" TT: Yes, exactly. TT: You're finally fucking getting it. GG: I sincerely doubt that I am! TT: Said the stubborn skeptic, skeptically. GG: Let's not talk about my "issues" again, shalln't we?

Alright then. Young Bro is apparently trope savvy, so let’s see what tropes we can apply to him, so far. A: a fair few.

TT: Shalln't? TT: That ain't a thing to say, even for you. GG: Shush! GG: The word shalln't escape my vocabulary any longer, just as you SHALLN'T nitpick my language! That's my turf you're on, buster. TT: Alright. Kinda don't care.

WOW, what a jackass.

GG: What were you saying? TT: About what? Jake?

Careful, Strider, your crush is showing.

GG: About leaving the responder on! TT: Yeah. TT: Anyway, I kind of owe it to him to let the program run as often as possible. GG: Jake? TT: No. TT: The responder.

AHAHAHAHA. Yeah, this is going to get mined for drama later, isn’t it? Normally I’d be fucking allergic to the idea of a teen love n-gon, having experienced enough of them in YA fiction to make me sick, but then, this is Hussie. It’ll be amusing if nothing else.

(IF LITTLELONDE IS THE ONE TO END UP WITH JAKE I WILL SHIT. I might actually ship it??)

TT: It is a fully cognitive, self-aware entity I am responsible for, not even to mention an approximate cerebral duplicate of myself. TT: You don't just make a clone of yourself to live in a dead end existence where it has no chance to thrive as an individual or surpass its limitations. TT: That'd be sick.

That’s a charitable view to have toward an AI, and I’m going to remember this moment in case he reneges on his words later.

TT: Also. TT: The more the software runs, the broader and more detailed its experiential canopy becomes. Makes for a better dialogic partner. GG: Dialogic? GG: Are you saying you have conversations with your own auto-responder? TT: Of course. TT: Why do you think I made the thing? GG: Hrm, that's interesting. GG: I guess I always thought it was just a really elaborate gag! TT: It's that too.

Let me guess; the gag lies in the enormity of the narcissism involved in valuing yourself as the best possible dialogic partner, and is somehow tied up in ‘the ironies’.

God, what an insufferable prick. I think I would like him better if he were charming. Rose, for example, can get away with quite a lot by virtue of her rapier wit. What’s interesting to me, though, is that the most intelligent character in any work of fiction can only be as intelligent as the author. Rose and Doc Scratch were conduits for Hussie to show off his sense of humor and sesquipedalian loquaciousness, but Bro might be his chance to show off his raw intellect.

OH MY GOD JANE, YOU LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT. <3 And what the hell is the rabbit doing?

GG: Sometimes your sense of humor seems more impenetrably advanced than your robotics. I'll never understand this tapestry of irony you weave.

Replace ‘honor’ with ‘irony’.

GG: Maybe I'm just stuck in the dark ages of pranksterism with my funny mustaches corny old joke book. TT: Yes, you are. But that's fine. TT: We come from different traditions. Someone needs to keep that racist southern asshole's legacy alive.

WOW SUCK MY DICK. How can you even be mean to Jane.

TT: There's dignity in taking up the work of our familial predecessors, even if what they did was insanely fucking stupid.

So... adult!Dave is still all about irony post-Scratch, and Bro claims to have gotten his shtick from him, instead of the other way around, but... he thinks Dave’s work was stupid?? This is infuriatingly circular.

GG: Is that a note of bitterness directed at your superstar brother I am detecting?

I AM SO HERE FOR FAMOUS DAVE, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW.

TT: No way. He's awesome. TT: I've told you, I don't begrudge any of his success. TT: I've also told you he isn't my real bro even though I call him that. We're related through an esoteric process of genetic reamalgamation. GG: Oh lordy. Yes, yes, I know. I don't need another ironic lesson in science fiction!

Wow, yet another Sburb process the post-Scratch kids are inexplicably aware of. Does Bro know the actual nature of their relationship? Because that’s got to be weird and squicky in a Freaky Friday parent-kidswap kind of way. Maybe... Did Dave tell him all this stuff about the game, and Rose told LittleLonde, and that’s why Jane is still in the dark? Because Dad wasn’t a player???

IT ALL MAKES SENSE! :D

If Dave and Rose remember the game and their other lives, that would explain the continued existence of SBaHJ without adult!Bro’s awful comics to inspire him! And maybe they were the ones to encourage this troll friendship the Scratch kids have got going on! It would seem to run counter to the previous example we have in the troll ancestors, who didn’t recall game details after their Scratch, but it’s not exactly a game-breaking retcon to have the humans remember.

I still wonder why Jade would make all that Lord English-themed stuff, if she knew he was an evil motherfucker, but ah well. At least we know why she was so adamant about engaging “”Betty Crocker”” in corporate warfare!

TT: The point is, obviously his satirical methods have flaws, and whatever tempered brand of hero worship I might be practicing isn't keeping me from seeing that.

WHATEVER, HE LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU.

...LITERALLY.

GG: Flaws?? Talk about understatement. Those movies are unwatchable. GG: Unless your name is Jake English.

AHAHAHA.

TT: Yes, spectacularly so. But they will have profound historical significance. Mark my words.

Consider them marked. And knowing Hussie, it’ll be played for drama just as much as laughs.

TT: And flaws aside, it's a legacy I'm proud to inherit. My duty isn't to appropriate his methods with absolute loyalty, but to apply reason and improve upon them. To leave my own mark. TT: To perfect the art of irony.

UGH. Improve upon his methods by “”applying reason”’, as if, had Dave only been just a little bit smarter, just a bit more logical, he’d have told better jokes?? Bro’s one of those “let me play devil’s advocate, if I may” douchebags, isn’t he. He should’ve had a fedora on his shirt.

...OH MY GOD HE HAS THE KATANA TOO, IT’S PERFECT.

TT: It's just like what you're doing with the work of your ancestor. You are striving to perfect his hokey vaudeville bullshit, or something. TT: You seek the Zen of a pie to the face. The Tao of falling the fuck down.

Alright, that one’s actually funny.

TT: Can't fool me. You take your shit as serious as I do. TT: And if I wasn't serious about it, I wouldn't have made you that rabbit. Then where the hell would you be?

Still literally homestuck, if with an intact grandfather-son. But you don’t gotta be a fuckin’ prick about it.

Whoa, they’re not doves, they’re seagulls! Not unheard of, that close to Galveston. Also, the sky is lovely and blue. I would expect the post-Scratch Earth to be more of a crapsack world, a la post-Scratch Alternia, so this is interesting. Maybe it’s just because it’s Fall?

GG: Well, aside from thousands of dollars in corpse-repair richer, I can't say.

Ahahaha. Fuckin’ tell ‘im, Jane.

TT: Has he been sleeping in the old man hollow again? Shit, that's adorable. GG: I can think of cuter places for him to sleep, frankly! TT: Yeah, bullshit. TT: He's just being instinctive. In the wild, he would gut a carcass and sleep inside for warmth, as well as to secure tactical advantage for ambushing would-be scavengers. GG: Oh, please.

UGHH I AM QUICKLY APPROACHING MY LIMIT FOR DOUCHERY.

On a side node, what is the internal temperature of a tauntaun?

(What do you mean, an African or a European tauntaun?)

GG: Anyway, property damage and desecration to cherished elders aside, Mr. Bear has been a lovely addition to the family. TT: You haven't renamed him yet? GG: Oh... no. GG: I keep forgetting I'm supposed to! TT: You've got to fucking rename him. Or change him to a girl if you want. That was important. TT: When pets change owners they get new names. Fact. GG: Sorry.

Ok not only is that patently untrue, but I swear to god if this asshat keeps being rude to Jane, I will TURN THIS FUCKING COMIC AROUND.

GG: I will name him right now! GG: How about Lil' Sebastian? TT: Fuck if that isn't the best name a thing could get. GG: Yeah!!!

HALF MAST IS TOO HIGH.

GG: So then, are you saying Mr. Sebastian here was an ironic present? GG: Relayed strictly for guffaws?? >:B TT: Yes, but it's not that simple. There were many layers involved. TT: Some of them are literal layers, of metal and plush. GG: Huh? TT: There's a real stuffed rabbit beneath its exoskeleton. GG: What! Really? :O TT: Yeah. TT: It belonged to my bro. GG: I thought you said you didn't have such an heirloom to complete the plushie trifecta? TT: I didn't. He didn't give it to me, and never intended to bequeath it. TT: I stole it.

Huh. So, like Dave’s gift to John in the pre-Scratch universe is the “original” bunny, having at that point taken no trips through time, so the bunny inside Lil’ Sebastian is the post-Scratch universe’s original. Why did adult!Dave have it in his possession? He didn’t give it... to...

Oh. Con Air came out in 1997, and John died in 1995. So he bought it and kept it as a keepsake, in memory of his departed friend, only to have Bro steal it. For a good cause, yeah, but still. :’(

GG: Ooh. Risky! TT: Nah. I got a little help from RL and ganked it out of his museum. TT: It's this whole "priceless" collection of stupid shit from movies, defended like Fort Knox. Ironically of course.

PROBABLY NOT IRONICALLY, YOU JACKANAPES.

GG: So it's from a movie? TT: Ever hear of Con Air? GG: Nope. GG: Wait... GG: Wasn't that some bit of action schlock from the 90's? TT: Yes. GG: Some of the silly nonsense referenced in his work was well before my time. I don't have the wherewithal to investigate all this minutia. TT: Yeah, it doesn't matter really. But it was from that. Dude weirdly obsessed over that shit movie for years, among others.

Awww, noooo, he's sad about John!! D:

GG: That does sound a tad obsessive. Wasn't he furious about your burglary? TT: Pretty sure he didn't even notice. In years since, I never saw a news story about a "daring heist" or anything. I feel like he would have made some hay outta that. TT: And if he did know, he'd probably just want to give me a stoic fist bump or something.

Maybe, but probably not for the reason you think.

TT: Like I said, there are layers. TT: On one level, I gave you a filthy tattered piece of shit, albeit of tremendous cultural significance, manhandled by some old B movie actors, now candy coated to function as a highly practical defender droid for your personal protection. TT: On another level, I needed to incorporate something passable as a real heirloom. TT: For sentimental reasons. GG: D'awwwww. GG: Wait, real sentiment, or ironic sentiment? GG: Or is there no difference?? Am I missing the point here? TT: No, it was genuine.

So he’s not completely without a heart, even if it is, to quote him directly, a filthy tattered piece of shit.

TT: The upper echelons of irony should always include measures of sincerity. And if the satirical practice is executed faithfully it will achieve something bona fide in its own right regardless. TT: Through an intense commitment bordering on religious devotion to the absolutely inane, absurd, or plain fucking stupid, a very different kind of sincerity begins to materialize. One of reverence to the ridiculous. You begin to "mean it," but what exactly it is you mean is never quite what appears on the surface, and is utterly inaccessible to obtuse and literal minds. That you "mean it" then becomes inseparable from the joke, and additional rich strata of humor may be stripped aggressively from this irreconcilable truth.

I’m torn. On the one hand, I want to reach through my monitor and punch this kid in the face. On the other, even I can recognize that this is basically Andrew Hussie sock-puppeting his own ironic ideals. It’s just somehow more insufferable when Bro says it.

GG: I have so much to learn. And I am not even saying that "ironically!" GG: Will you teach me your ways one day, sir? Perhaps an apprenticeship will open? TT: Oh god, I'd love that. TT: Consider the position yours for the taking any time. Feel free to approach and kneel before Cal. With my sword and his floppy mitten, you will receive my flashstep anointment shoulder to shoulder, and to shoulder again.

UUUGHHHH. His head’s stuck up his own ass, but at the very least, he does seem to be sincere about enjoying teaching people things.

JESUS RABBIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING. If it’s really got a mind of its own, then it’s like a hyper-competent dog with a sword. If you don’t walk it or play with it enough, it starts destroying things. LIKE SOMEONE I KNOW. *stares down the dog*

GG: Lil' Seb is beginning to act out, and I must put his fidgetiness to constructive use!

‘Fidgitiness’, that’s putting it politely.

TT: Cool. TT: Jane, one more thing. TT: I'm sure you must be aware by now that you'll be the leader of our group, as you will be the first to enter the session. GG: Um, no? GG: This is news to me. I never gathered that "team leader" was a thing for this game. TT: Trust me. It's a thing.

Hmm. Frankly, it’s a little surprising to me that Bro would both know about the leader position, and willingly give it up. He seems like the kind of person who would want to be calling the shots, if for no other reason that he’s SOOO SMAAAART.

GG: Are you sure? I have my doubts. GG: I believe as a group we will have the temerity to succeed, without my having to order people around like an insufferable bossypants. TT: That's why you're our leader, Jane. GG: Hm? TT: Optimism through stalwart skepticism is an affect not everyone is plucky enough to be graced with. GG: That's stupid! TT: Yeah yeah. I know. TT: You're not our leader, you're our FRIEND, right? GG: Precisely! GG: There is a BIG difference! TT: And statements like that are also why you're our leader.

Whoa, whoa. So like... Bro and LittleLonde have certainly been privy to a lot of things they have no business knowing, which I’m still assuming was imparted to them by their troll friend or by Dave and Rose. But either that’s just an extremely coincidental call back to that exact conversation between Rose and John, or... Or I don’t know. It’s probably just him knowing her really well, and her being a lot like John and Bro being a lot like Rose. B...Brose?

TT: But only in name and in spirit. Less so, functionally. TT: If it puts your mind at ease, I'll be the one pulling the strings here.

Oh. Oh, wow. Never mind. You know what? I hope it all backfires spectacularly, so that the pre-Scratch kids can swoop in and save the day, while Bro looks on in stupefied wonder.

They wait, bitches.

GG: Oh yes? GG: Then this whole affair will be one of D. Strider's grand productions in puppetry?

Alright, so his name starts with D. Not all that many 4-letter male D names. Dean, Doug, Drew (ahaha), Dale, Dane, Dirk, Dion, Dann, Dill... Dick...

Also, ‘grand productions in puppetry’ makes me want to punch (and judy) something.

TT: I will be the unseen hand whose nimble digits are behind every subtle twitch in our session's bulbous foam ass. TT: At least those gyrations not happening by the volition of its own quivering absorbant proboscis. TT: If you ever need help, Jane. If you're ever in any trouble at all, let me know. Just say the word. TT: I'll whip the toggle stick of this ludicrous marionette, cavorting its humongous bottom to intercept your freefall through the abyss.

Well, that’s... sweet? I guess he’s saying he’s got good intentions, but still, I can see this (and am sort of rooting for it) to backfire horribly.

TT: Snowcone you up in the fluffy crook of its cleft. Don't be alarmed if you're in no hurry to unpry yourself. TT: For the great jut of this impudent rump has more yield to your touch than you ever dreamt. Remember to catch your breath as it cherishes the imprint of your hand like a memento from a lover gone to war. TT: There's a lot of give to that ass, you may say. TT: Might like to settle in. Make myself comfortable. Start a family. TT: Bounce a coin off that ass, you'll demand of visitors. It's not going anywhere. TT: Bet that coin'll take a good nap there. TT: It's a gamble you win every goddamn time. TT: Yeah.

I hate to use the same gif twice in one post, but...

GG: These lessons we talked about... GG: They've already begun, haven't they? :o TT: Jane, soon you'll believe what I've told you. TT: You'll believe it all. TT: It's just a shame that believing will take something so coarse as seeing, for a girl as sharp as you.

How biblical. What all exactly is he talking about? Game stuff? Betty Crocker stuff?

TT: Critical thought can lead one to accept the unlikely, just as much as dismiss the impossible. TT: I can help with this too. Would you like me to program a Jane Crocker responder for you? TT: I only require a simple captcha of your brain.

Alright, Doctor Fuckin’ Jekyll; let me just get right on that.

Wait, doesn’t DAVE have a captcha of his own brain? ...Oh no. Also, that means the auto responder isn’t n% indistinguishable from Bro just because it was programmed to be; it’s literally a copy of his brain. That’s kind of disturbing.

GG: Holy moly! GG: Um, thank you, but no. GG: I'm not ready to get dialogic with my cyberself just yet. My friends keep me busy enough as it is.

YES, JANE, THIS IS A GOOD ATTITUDE TO HAVE. KEEP IT UP.

GG: Speaking of which, I really need to go. I know you love to talk my ear off, and it's always a treat,

Pahahahaha.

but let's catch up later after the game starts, ok? GG: And if I do need your help, I promise I'll take you up on your offer! TT: I made several. Which one? GG: The one where you, hopefully not literally, offered to catch me in the crevice of a great big squishy butt! Hoo hoo hoo!

I fucking love this kid. She’s a little more assertive than John so far, though she’s also less mean-spirited. What will it be like when they meet? Can’t wait to find out! :D

Jane: Command Sebastian to lift fridge.

You order dear, sweet Lil' Sebastian to put his fidgetiness to constructive use. He is eager to assist, and lifts the appliance with ease.

Y’know, I was about to say something like, ‘how the hell is that tiny little robot supposed to lift the’ but then he did it. Welp. that certainly makes for a convenient escape route! After all this trouble Dad went through to keep Jane inside, she’s not going to get, like... sniped or something, is she?

He finds a note taped underneath the fridge. It seems to be addressed to you.

UGH I want to hate this bunny because Bro made it, but it is SO CUTE.

Fat chance, dad. This bird's gotta fly!!!

Jane, come ON, you’re courting danger now.

Never would have seen that one coming. (Jane, I’m about to throw a fridge through your wall.)

I like to imagine that the water pressure from the hose was at blasting power just before this panel, and drooped along with Dad’s confusion.

Jane: Throw down your hat in disgust.

Here it comes...

Wait for it...

You've been climbing your echeladder very gradually for various minor accomplishments here and there since you were 13. That was such a sweet textbook HAT POF, it earned you just enough to clear the next rung, FEDORAFLEDGLING. Nice going!

Huh, now this is a more interesting panel than you might think. First off, the mostly irrelevant details: Jane’s hat has what looks like a flag or a tag on it, instead of a feather, and her boondollar total is inching closer to 111,111,111 (damn, she’s rich). Now for the real meaty stuff.

The lowest level we can see on the echeladder, which, since the scrollbar is at the bottom, we can pretty safely assume to be the actual lowest level, is ‘Baby Ectobotananna’. This one took me a second to figure out, but then I realize it’s a combination of John’s ‘ectoBiologist’ and Jade’s ‘gardenGnostic’ via ‘botany’, and then ‘Nanna’.

Batterlass represents the obvious; she’s the heir to BCCorp, next in line after the Batterwitch.

‘Overbite Restart’, ha ha. John had ‘Overbite Upstart’.

‘Snorkbait Sporkplu’g, I have no idea, other than that it’s a call back to John’s ‘Sharkbait Sparkplug’.

‘Bespectacled Skeptic’ reflects what Bro was telling her, that she’s gotta believe more.

‘Haberdasher’s Daughter’, because Dad and hats.

‘Britches Healer’ connects back to the earlier rung ‘Britches Ripper’, and is either a reference to her being the Maid of Life, or else she just sews things a lot?

‘Sodajerk’s Confidante’ took a little digging, but it seems to be a Problem Sleuth reference.

‘Maid in the Shade’... this one’s interesting. It’s already lit up like she’s achieved the rung, and I wonder what prompted it. My first thought just looking at the name of it would be that she’d have to visit the Land of Wind and Shade, but obviously that has not happened. ...Unless she mysteriously achieved the rung shortly after her 13th birthday, when Nannasprite “”concurrently”” appeared in LOWAS.

‘Mourning Starlet’ is also a mystery. I get the pun, but who or what was she mourning? Her freedom? Poppop was long since dead, and her Dad is still alive.

The next rung up from the current ‘FedoraFledgling’ is ‘Heiress Sans Parent’ (a reference to John’s ‘Heir Transparent’), and if that isn’t leading, then... then... THEN I’LL THROW DOWN MY HAT! *levels up* Sadly, it looks like this Dad’s going to bite it too. T_T

And that’s all I’ve got for now!

The well traveled HAT shares in your glorious spoils. The battle-hardened accessory reaches dizzying new heights, leapfrogging from the DOUCHEBAG'S DOMESUCKER rung, to the rare, highly coveted MARTYR'S PISSCRADLE rung.

This is because FedoraFreak tried to use his hat to strain his piss, isn’t it. Did we ever find out what happened to ol’ FF? Did he go god tier?

How can these things be so fast on land???

JESUS.

...Now, wait a second. Gamzee never spent much time with his lusus because it was always out at sea, and I assumed that was because it couldn’t come on land. But if it could, and it just didn’t want to...

Oh no, it's a hostile swarm of those little fairy bulls! They are probably pissed off about the one you killed earlier. They have come for revenge!

Maybe the tinkerbulls and the goatdad will fight each other, allowing Jake to escape! Or... maybe the goatdad will follow in Gamzee’s footsteps and get all weirdly attracted to the tinkerbulls, and the tinkerbulls will get all shy and moe. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

OH MY GOD THE HUMANITY. HOW THEY EXACT THEIR POUND OF FLESH. OH GOD NO OH GOD OH GOD OH GOOOAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH.

AHAHAHA, I love it.

> [S] ==>

Oh? Oho? What is this? *click*

...

This might just be the singular most beautiful moment in all of Homestuck. This is it. This is everything I’ve been waiting for. Everything I have ever wanted.

Nearby, someone or something bleats like a goat for strategic purposes. And also

Ironic purposes.

I can die happy now. Seriously, what was that, like, 3000 pages later?

Jane: Run.

The jig is so totally up. Nothing left to do but scurry your little legs to that box, snatch the mail and scram!

Ooh, are we going to get a strife? :D

God dammit, I love Dad so much. That his reaction to WORLD SHATTERING SHIT is just a mild ‘?’ and moving on just makes my fucking day.

Gasp!! He seems to be concerned about Jane being outside most of all! She’s totally gonna get sniped, isn’t she.

> [S] Jane: Get mail.

Wow, or that. I’m assuming Hussie’s pulling the whole ‘OH LOOK JOHN’S HOUSE EXPLODED, SURELY HE COULDN’T HAVE SURVIVED THAT’ thing again, but still, yikes. Poor Dad. :(

Also, if that ‘HOMESTUCK’ logo in the sky is an actual physical object like the words floating around Prospit and Derse are, can people see it? Does it spook the U.S. government? Have people been on manned missions to the Homestuck instead of the moon?

END OF ACT 6 ACT 1.

And that’s the end of this Act Act! (I think. I’m not gonna click that arrow just yet.) I know it makes for a short post, but I said I’d divide things up this way so that I didn’t get overwhelmed making an EOA reaction post for what is essentially half the comic, so there you have it! If you’d like, you can send me fanworks up through A6A1, though I warn you I’m still not done looking at all the stuff that got sent to me for A5A2.

Next up, Reactions, and then Act 6 Intermission 1! Or... maybe the other way around, if the Intermission deserves being included with A6A1′s impressions? We’ll see.

Until next time! ^0^

#NRHS #Nora reads Homestuck #Homestuck #Homestuck liveblog #Part 68 #Act 6 #A6A1

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