#but instead we cut to him being rude to athena and blackquill having to save her ass because capcom hates women

[blueskittlesart]

the way that nahyuta from a purely aesthetic perspective should be exactly the kind of character i go for but hes so goddamn annoying that it put me off him immediately....

[nerdyskeleton]

wow i wonder who this anon is wow omg wooww so secret omg, wow. XD anyway if i pay you will you write simon taking a bullet for nahyuta because i have to see your words telling that story.

*looks into the camera like she’s on the office because she just wrote Simon Blackquill getting shot for the second time* link on ao3

under the cut for dramatic length

Knowing he and Apollo fought tofind the truth always fills Nahyuta with righteous satisfaction. They walk out ofthe courtrooms together, and he immediately focuses on Simon, who stands talland dark and foreboding by the red columns flanking the grand doorway ofTehm’pul Temple. Rayfa rudely cuts in front of her older brother to move closerto Apollo. Though Taka rests on Simon’s shoulder, and Nahyuta is still ratherterrified of the bird, he reaches to plant a kiss on his cheek.

“That was far too short, Sad Monk,”Simon scolds. “You blatantly missed three very effective arguments.”

Apollo blanches and sighs, “No way,Prosecutor Blackquill, that lasted long enough.” His bangs droop as he rubs atthe indents the beads left on his forehead.

Rayfa joins in next to say, “Yutybarely fought Apollo on my insights!”

“You always complain of having torefine them if we argue too much. Besides, you skipped back to your seat next to Simon, Rayfa; you couldn’t waitfor the séance to be over.” The monk sticks out his tongue in response to herown.

They spend some time bickering likechildren, with Apollo trying to calm things down every once and a while.Nahyuta looks over briefly to see Simon scratching at Taka’s neck, yet shepulls away from him and squawks quietly. He gives her a look, like he’sdisappointed in her behavior or embarrassed by her rejection. He hides thelittle smile on his face and turns back to the conversation at hand.

Taka suddenly screeches deafeninglyloud and pushes off of Simon’s shoulder. Simon flinches at her movement,probably because she dug her talons into his arm; Nahyuta jumps a little,because he expects her to attack him. But Taka flies high into the air andcircles their little group before going higher. She shrieks; Simon visiblytenses next to him. Nahyuta looks to the sky to find her swooping down towardsthe roof of the temple. Simon’s eyes are following her every movement, andNahyuta chooses to watch him, now.

And very abruptly, Simon Blackquillshoves Nahyuta as hard as he can. The bang of a gunshot ricochets across thetemple walls. Taka cries once more.

Once he recovers from being tossedto the side, Nahyuta grips at himself, expecting pain to blossom somewhere.When it doesn’t come to him, he turns to Apollo and Rayfa, who both appearunscathed. Apollo drags the young girl out of the open. Nahyuta looks next tohis terrible panda boyfriend who pushed him…out of the way.

His stomach twists like a wringedneck as he steps around to face Simon, who has yet to move since the boomingshot. He grows ill and cold at the sight of his labored, wheezing breaths, andhis skin is certainly paler than normal. Nahyuta hates that he knows how badthis is already. Simon’s eyes lose focus, and they don’t gain it back atNahyuta’s command of his name.

“Simon? Are you hurt?” It’s astupid question – he knows it.

He surely has a lovely, sarcasticresponse for Nahyuta, but instead, Simon opens his mouth and all that comes outis blood. He coughs more and more, some of it splattering Nahyuta, but he needsto catch the man, as he’s collapsing like a tidal wave. Hot crimson stains hisclothes as Simon moans and shudders against him. Then he is still.

Nahyuta can’t say anything. Hecan’t make a sound. Nothing that he could say or do now would fix what has justhappened. He just stands there while supporting Simon and tries not to noticehow limp he’s come, how much blood he’s already lost. Is Simon literally goingto die in his arms? He’s absolutely a deadweight; he’s held Simon before, buthe’s never been this weak and limpand bleeding out. Precious seconds are ticking by. Why is he just standinghere?

The only time Nahyuta makes a soundis when guards suddenly seize him, and paramedics appear behind Simon. Theywrench them apart. The medics have trouble accommodating all of Simon’s deadweight, and the sight horrifies Nahyuta.

He calls his name weakly whilebeing manhandled and literally dragged away back into the temple, so he is nolonger out in the open and in anymore danger. A pitiful cry escapes his throat,though no tears fall from his eyes, as he catches glimpse of the medicssurround Simon. He is led down to the dreary basement of the temple, and Rayfahas already been secured in the little room. A guard forces him into a ricketychair next to his sister, and then they take their own seat by the door. Rayfais obviously staring at him.

Hours pass, and Nahyuta fills thetime with worse and worse scenarios of what could be happening. Forty-fiveminutes in, the fact that Simon is most likely dead and cold forms, and try asNahyuta might to force it away, it doesn’t go away.

He wants to do something, but heknows there’s nothing he could actually do. He’s not a surgeon, and he can’tfix Simon’s very real problem with a sardonic comment and a threat ofbanishment. Eventually he begins to pace the cramped room, but after two hours,he’s practically worn a trail in the floor. The heavy door swings open, and aguard beckons them both out. Two flank Rayfa, and Nahyuta is practicallysurrounded by burly people. As selfish and terrible as a thought it is, hewould much prefer one of these noble people sacrifice themselves instead ofSimon.

It is dark by the time they getback to the palace. Apollo stands just inside the gates, and he looks beyondexhausted.

“You want to get out of thoseclothes, and then we’ll go to the hospital?” he asks his older brother. Nahyutadoesn’t understand for a minute, but it suddenly clicks that Simon coughed up(what felt like) massive amounts of blood on him. He fingers at the stains,knowing that sort of thing happens with an injured lung or stomach. He can onlypicture what happened on the temple steps before he was mercilessly pulled awayfrom his panda.

“Is he dead?” He just needs to knowthat.

“Still in surgery. They are prettytightlipped,” Apollo explains, “but I think if you show up, they’ll tell youeverything.”

He could still die.

He waits until Rayfa is gone withsome guards before addressing another one with, “What happened to the assassin?”

The guard looks a little uneasy.“He was…mutilated. By Prosecutor Blackquill’s hawk. Pretty much tore his faceclean off.”

“Where is Taka?”

“No one knows.”

“What!” Nahyuta grows angry, but heknows it’s about the wrong thing. “You’ll find that bird even if it takes alldamn night, do you understand?”

“I-I was going to take you and Mr.Justice to-”

“No. You will find that terriblebird and bring her to Simon’s room. He needs someone there for him. I don’tcare if the doctors deny her – tell them it was a direct order from me.” Heexhales. The guard skitters off but not before giving a look to Apollo. Herests a hand on Nahyuta’s shoulder.

“Do you want to go see Blackquill?Amara said she would take things over while you’re there with him, until hewakes up.”

“Did you alert Athena?”

Apollo is clearly taken aback. “Uh,yeah. I called her a few hours ago. She told me she was going to bullyEdgeworth into getting her a jet. She’ll be here in the next few days.”

“I’ll have a place ready for herhere, unless you wish for her to stay with you.”

“I guess it’s up to her…Nahyuta,are you okay?”

He looks at the annoying goldenbracelet on his wrist. “Has anyone contacted Aura? I will, if no one has yetdone so.”

“How about you hold off on thatuntil you have more to tell her than just ‘Your brother’s been mortallywounded,’ okay? Do you not want tosee him?”

“You said yourself he was stillbeing operated on. N-No point in wasting my time.” He can’t sit idle while themedical team works to save his life. The image of Simon practically vomitingblood keeps flooding his mind, and there has to be something that can get it tostop. He knows sleep won’t help, and he knows that sitting in an uncomfortablechair in a hospital will only force his imagination to run wild. Therefore, theonly thing to be done is every thing.

“Nahyuta!” Apollo looks furious andperplexed with his older brother.

“What, Apollo! I am doing whatneeds to be done. If you are finally finished asking me the same inane question,I will call Simon’s sister to tell her what has happened. Please inform mymother, if you happen to see her, that I will carry on my duties as normal.”

Nahyuta storms away. If he is topossibly live a life without Simon Blackquill, he might as well begin preparingfor it now. Besides, there is no doubt in his mind that Simon will have nothingto do with him after this ordeal. Nahyuta had been too care free thisafternoon, and he let his guard down. Simon, pragmatic and alert as always, wasthe only one to react. He will surely hate Nahyuta for his inobservance and forletting this happen to him. Athena will hate him, too. Aura already dislikeshim, but this will not improve her opinion of Nahyuta at all.

Nahyuta shuts himself into hischambers and gathers his work together. He has some cases to go through, aswell as ensure the guilty party from the trial earlier today is punishedappropriately. He has some waiting to do before he is able to call the prisonAura is held in. He forces himself to complete some work until the prison canaccept his call.

Nahyuta calls the warden and waitspatiently for the buffoon to connect Aura. The conversation goes about as wellas Apollo claimed it would, as Nahyuta merely informs her of what little factshe knows.

She curses him out for an obsceneamount of time before finally screaming, “If you let my little brother die, Iwill break every royal bone in your body.”

“The doctors are doing all thatthey can, Aura.”

“I’m never forgiving you for this,you stupid monk. How could you let this happen?”

“I wasn’t aware of the danger.Simon pushed me out of the way before I properly understood what washappening.”

“Yes, because you’re never aware ofwhat is going on around you. What else do you know about him? Is he awake?”

“I have yet to hear anything.”

“Well, go and listen forsomething! He’s going to call me the second he can, and he’s going to get hisass back here. I don’t want him going over to your shitty kingdom again.”

“Yes, I’ve had the same thought,Aura.”

“Don’t patronize me!” she screamsinto the receiver. “I meant what I said! I’ll kill you, Sahdmadhi.”

“Athena will be here in the countryshortly.”

“Oh? You going to have her killed,too?”

“Aura, please.”

She hangs up. He swallows, feelinguneasy that someone else shares his same thought process. Simon should not comeback here to Khura’in. It is obviously dangerous, and Nahyuta cannot take thatchance. So, if by some miracle, Simon still isn’t dead, he will not see him again.

He works through the day andignores all visitors, including Apollo, who just comes by to see if he canforce food into Nahyuta’s stomach. He refuses to eat, and he still isn’tsleeping. The monk only recently changed out of his clothes from that day.

Amara finally forces her way intohis room to tell him that Athena has just landed in the country. Thankfully,his mother refrains from comments on his appearance, as it is surely ragged andunkempt. As he glides through the palace halls, Nahyuta tries to get his flathair up into something manageable. He’s just managed to force it into a bunwhen the main entrance swings open, and Apollo and Athena timidly cross thethreshold.

Athena approaches them both. Shelets her bag slip over her shoulder as she throws both arms around Nahyuta’sneck. He accepts the hug and tries to offer words of comfort to her, but she’spulling away and insisting she be taken to her best friend immediately.

Nahyuta realizes he has no ideawhere Simon is being held in the hospital, so he sends Apollo a pleading lookto take them there. Guards, obviously, follow close behind. No one in thehospital questions the trio when Apollo brushes past the people at the entrance.They ride the elevator up a few floors, stopping off on the seventh floor.  

Nahyuta offers to take Athena’s bagand return it to her room at the palace, since she brought it along with herfor some reason. She tells him not to worry about it, and his heart sinks.

“Have you talked to him?” she asksNahyuta.

“He’s…been asleep every time I havecome by.” Unfortunately, both immediately detect his lie. Apollo rubs at hisbracelet, and Athena’s brows draw together at that statement. She must detect therelief in his heart at that statement. And also the fact that’s a blatant lie,since he hasn’t been by.

It’s obvious where Simon isresting, since there’s another damn guard outside the other rooms in the hall.He eyes Athena but steps aside immediately when he sees Nahyuta is accompanyingthem.

“You go in and see him, Athena,” hesays, tugging at the bag on her shoulder. “I’ll speak with someone aboutgetting rid of this for you.”

“Nahyuta, it’s really okay. Justcome inside and sit. If he’s not awake, I want to talk about what happened withyou.”

He inhales, and Athena’s pushingopen the gray door before he can truly prepare himself for what’s inside. Apollodrags him inside, as Athena’s preoccupied with plopping right down on the bedand squeezing at Simon’s hand.

He’s got an IV in the crook ofelbow, which surely provides a cocktail of pain medication and nourishment forhim. Tubes run in and out of him, with one thick one protruding from his mouth.Practically the only indication that he is alive is the incessant beeping ofthe heart monitor, because his chest barely rises and falls with his breathing.They have him propped up just slightly, but the pillows behind his back areslowly slipping downwards, and he absolutely cannot be comfortable like that. Nahyutadesperately wants to throw everyone from the room and wish away the pain or putit upon himself and gather all of Simon Blackquill into his arms and cradle himclose; he wants Simon back, and he wants him to be healthy and to live the lifehe deserves, which is far, far away from himself and brings no more pain orsacrifice.

Nahyuta has barely felt anythingthe past few days, but he suddenly has trouble holding back tears. Oh god, notnow. Apollo is watching him carefully as he backs away and eases himself intothe chair by the door. There’s an empty chair on the other side of the bed,which the monk absolutely refuses to sit in, despite Athena’s insistence.

Yet not wanting to be idle, hewanders over to the shut curtains and wrenches them open to get some sunlightin here. However, Taka is perched on the branches just outside the window, andshe screams and pecks at the window. Nahyuta shouts in surprise, takencompletely off guard in his overly exhausted state.

“Let her in!” Athena demands.

Apollo interjects, “I tried to lether in, but the hospital doesn’t want her here!”

Nahyuta no longer cares about thebird complaining at him through the window. He’s hyper focused on thefluttering of Simon’s eyelids and the quickening beeping of the monitor. Theymust have made too much noise for the poor man to sleep peacefully. Athenanotices it immediately, too, and she’s grasping his hand tightly. Nahyuta isglad that he’s standing so far away from the bed, since he knows without adoubt he would not be able to handle looking him directly in the eyes.

“Hey friend,” Athena whispers. “Youhave a giant tube sticking out of your mouth, so don’t try to talk, okay?”There’s a pause and then she asks, “How are you? Oh wait – never mind.”

Nahyuta turns away to give Taka hisbest apologetic smile, but she hates everything about him and is also a hawk,so it does not do too much. While he’s facing the other direction, he hearsAthena laugh; perhaps Simon rolled his eyes at her question.

“I’m glad you’re okay. At least,you look pretty good, all things considered. Apollo told me where the guy gotyou. That must have been terrible.”

Nahyuta can’t stand here and listento this. He tears open the window to let Taka swoop in, and then he’s movingquickly to get the hell out of there. Athena shouts his name, and Apollo evenstands up to bar him from leaving.

“Nahyuta! Where are you going?”

Apollo spins him to face the two.

“I have things to take care of.” Heensures that he looks directly at Athena. Slowly yet unexpectedly, Simon’sother hand reaches up to paw at the tube stuck in his throat. He tugs justslightly, but Athena scolds him and puts his hand in his lap.

“It sucks that you can’t talk, Iknow, but,” she says, yet Nahyuta does not hear the rest of it, because he isout the door and down the hallway before Apollo can snatch him.

A few hours later, Athena findshim. She is not happy with him. Apparently, Simon is not either.

“I can’t believe you’re being so selfishabout this, Nahyuta,” Athena says calmly, yet with a hint of very real anger inher voice. The little thing around her neck flashes red.

“Pardon me?”

She shuts the folder he’s beencompiling all evening and grounds out, “Simon’s seriously regretting this wholesaving your dumb life business.”

“Oh? He told you that?” he askedsarcastically.

“Yes, because he was so furious with you for running away earlierthat he wouldn’t stop pulling on that tube. The doctor had to come in and takeit out for him so he didn’t injure himself. Any more than he already has,thanks to you.”

Those words hit hard. He knows thatSimon’s just barely escaped death because of him, and it is one of the worstthoughts he’s ever had. It’s been many months since Nahyuta has felt thishelpless and powerless, but the feeling is disgustingly familiar, and it needsto go away before he breaks down.

“You blame yourself, don’t you?”she asks. Her voice is so much softer this time. “Simon thinks you do, atleast. He knows you really well, and I like to think I know you well enough atthis point.” She leans against the desk he is working at.

“Of course…not.” He’s never beenmore upset with himself. His actions lately have been childish and desperate,and he hopes things are not ruined between him and Simon. After running fromhim, he tried to think of anything, something that he could say to explainhimself and to tell Simon how sorry he is for letting this happen. No words inEnglish or Khura’inese were adequate enough.

Athena sighs. “Well, whether or notyou do, you need to speak with Simon.”

“Yes, I am well aware.”

“When are you doing to do it?”

“Whenever he’s awake. I can’t forcea conversation with him if he’s asleep, of course.”

“You saw how easy he woke up thisafternoon. Let’s go tomorrow, so that he can get some sleep and calm down fromhow angry he is with you. Work the rest of the night to distract yourself andcome up with a good enough apology for my best friend, while you’re at it. I’llcall Aura, too, since I heard from Apollo it went very badly for you.” Shepushes herself away and leaves the room without another word.

Still, words escape Nahyuta. Hedoes not sleep again for the third night in a row and has taken to simplyliving off of twenty minute naps whenever he cannot handle staying awakeanymore. It is difficult to describe his feelings and thought processes in thiswhole ordeal, especially when Nahyuta has trouble discerning where the thoughtscame from in the first place. How can he defend himself in front of hissacrificial prosecutor? If Simon is truly so angry with him, perhaps there isno use in arguing and explaining.

For once, Nahyuta is thankful forthe bureaucracy of his position, which requires him to be at the Dance ofDevotion in the morning with Rayfa. Though he spies Athena in the audience,looking sour. Taka rests on her shoulder. They must be keeping watchful eyes onhim to ensure that Nahyuta gets to that damn hospital room to see his damn Simon.

The ceremony is over shortly.Nahyuta often takes his time exiting the temple, but Athena has other planswhen she charges up to him and drags him through the crowds. The throngs ofpeople surely part for this angry red-head and her angrier looking hawk and notfor their king-regent. They enter the main doors of the hospital and are thisclose to making it into an elevator when obscenely pregnant woman stops them.She asks him to bless her with the strength of the Holy Mother.

“I’m sorry, ma’am,” Athena cuts in,“but Prosecutor Sahdmadhi has his own guests to attend to.”

As close as they are and as much asAthena enjoys teasing him, Nahyuta gives her a stern look and says, “I willjoin you upstairs shortly.” She is not pleased but goes anyway. This givesNahyuta just one last chance to appear collected and calm in front of Simon. Hecan gather his thoughts as he prays over this woman.

When that is done and he sends thewoman off to her infantile doom, an old man taps him on the shoulder andrequests the same thing for him. He is blessed, as well, and Nahyuta is able tomake his escape after. The ride up to the elevator is terrifying, and he feelslike the rest of the people can hear how fast his heart is beating inanticipation.

He finds the tiny room and reachesto knock, but he holds off. The door is shut, so this must mean that he andAthena are having an important conversation. He would not wish to disturb that.Until a nurse wanders up and does that for him.

“Prosecutor Sahdmadhi, sir!” sheshouts. “This is a surprise! We’ve been wondering when you were going to comeback. You left in rather a hurry yesterday.”

“Yes, I had other concerns toattend to.”

“Of course you did.” He cannot tellif she’s being serious or not. “You can go in there any time you like, sir. Hisfriend just went in to see him a few minutes ago.”

“Yes, I wonder if you might knockfor me? I don’t wish to disturb them if they are discussing something dire. Youknow.”

It’s a flimsy excuse, and he feelslike a coward, but he can’t face angry Simon Blackquill and Athena Cykes. Notlooking and feeling so weak and tired and afraid like this. It doesn’t look asif the nurse knows what he means with “you know,” but she does as she’s told.

She pokes her head into the roomand says in a saccharine tone, “There’s a royalvisitor out-”

“Nahyuta,” Simon barks. It makes both him and the nurse jump, so sheis scurrying away as fast as her legs can take her. Despite the angry tone, heis so glad to get to hear Simon’s voice again. Before the heavy door shuts,Nahyuta grips the handle and shuts himself inside the room. Athena is back inher spot on the bed, with Taka resting at the foot of the creaky mattress Simonhas been living on. The man himself sits mostly reclined still, but his eyesare more alert, and he has some semblance of color in his cheeks. Athena isstill clutching at his hand tightly, though his other one clearly works verywell when he points menacingly to the chair on the other side of the bed. Nahyutafollows the silent instruction and sits.

It is very quiet until Athena says,“I just told him how much Taka loves Her Mercifulness.”

“Yes, she is the second favorite toyou…Simon.” For some reason, saying his name is incredibly difficult. “Rayfaoften jokes Mother prefers Taka over me.”

“I do, as well.”

He swallows, familiar annoyanceblooming in his chest. So glad Simonis not holding his tongue back. Athena tries to hide her surprised laughter,but it’s hard for her. She does love making fun of them both.

When she recovers, she actuallystands and announces, “I’m going to get up and go for a run. Maybe call Aurawhile I’m out, too. I heard she reallyyelled at the sad monk, Simon.”

“I can imagine she did. He mostlikely deserved it, too.” She squeezes his hand one last time before leavingthe room. Simon adjusts himself and settles as comfortably as he is able intothe pillows. His eyes are shut, until they open a moment later and starestraight at Nahyuta.

“Hello,” Simon says.

“Good morning.”

“You’ve been selfishly absent as oflate, Sad Monk. Why is that?”

“I have been busy. I was not ableto halt everything so that I might sit by your bedside until you wake up. Andin any case, I have been taking time alone to reflect on what has happened.”

“Ah, yes, and what have you come upwith?” He lets a hand fall, palm faced upwards, so that Nahyuta might hold ontoit like Athena was. Nahyuta does not, though, and he sits back in hisuncomfortable chair.

“This is a dangerous kingdom, and Iam a powerful, important individual here. Perhaps it would be best if we removedthis danger from your life.”

The heart monitor speeds upfractionally, but Simon ignores it to say, “If I may repeat in simpler terms,Nahyuta?”

“Of course.”

“I take a bullet for you, and youare attempting to end our relationship in the first moments we have alonetogether?”

“It needs to be done quickly.”

“I argue it does not need to bedone at all.” The monitor beeps louder. “Is this truly what you want, Nahyuta?”

“You must be kept safe, Simon, andthat is not happening here.”

“Perhaps I will never return toKhura’in, then, and you will come to Los Angeles each time we wish to see eachother.”

“No, I want you to be safe,” herepeats, “and you cannot do that near me. I must be far away from you.”

“And what will happen when you, inthis outlandishly dangerous countryof yours, are struck and killed? You die, and I am left in a world without you?Which, to be entirely honest, must be much simpler and less stubborn.”

“Do not manipulate me so you comeout on top of this conversation, Simon Blackquill. I have made my decision.”

“Mine is of no importance?”

“Not when lives are on the line.Not when yours is, and I am able todo something to protect it. I spent so long powerless, with no ability to makemy own choices and save those who needed to be saved. I have this power, and Iwill exercise it.”

“Christ, not this again.”

Nahyuta rises from the chair, hisanger rising, too. “Simon,” he starts, but the man cuts him off.

“If this is your entire agenda forthe day, you may leave,” he grinds out. “I am exhausted and am in no mood todeal with your pretentious, delusional beliefs. Is this all you had to say tome?”

Of all the nerve! After hearing howfurious Simon supposedly was with him for running out yesterday, and this ishow Nahyuta is treated. His anger spikes, and he removes his prayer beads infrustration and fury. Simon laughs at that, giving him an infuriating and alltoo familiar smirk. He hates that look on his face, and he hates that Simon hasthe audacity to laugh at him like this.

“I promised there would be no moredeaths at my hands, Simon. Your death will not be one of them!” Simon is notsmiling anymore. “I have too many deaths weighing on my shoulders, and I willbe unable to carry yours as well! I know I could not live the rest of my lifeknowing you were dead because of me. Ican barely stomach the hundreds of others whose deaths I have already caused.”

He throws the beads at Simon, whichis probably not the best idea, considering his rather fragile state. Theythankfully pelt him in the chest, where he is unharmed.

“You speak to me now as if I amsome goddamn moron, but you were the one who made yourself a sullen target inmy place! What is more reckless and ill thought out?”

“I know there was no thought putinto it, Nahyuta. I jumped quickly to save you.”

“At your own expense, Simon! God,do you have no ingrained need for self-preservation?”

“Do you recall when I went to prisonfor seven years for Athena?”

“This is entirely different.”

“Oh, is it? You just spoke of yoursacrifices, so am I not to ignore my own? You act surprised that I have donethis for you, meaning you have completely forgotten about the things I did forAthena.”

“That circumstance is different,Simon, dammit!”

“How?”

“It is! It is!” Nahyuta is losingcontrol, and he will snap any moment now. “She was not aware what you weredoing for her. I have been too fully aware of the sacrifices you have made forme that have landed you where are you.”

“Nahyuta,” Simon snaps, “explain tome how you have any right to be angry with me for letting you live.”

“You’re not understanding what I’msaying,” Nahyuta answers unhelpfully, feeling a hysterical laugh form in histhroat. “I cannot talk to you right now.” He snatches his rosary up and turnsto leave, but Simon shouts his name. The monk turns to him, exasperated and onthe verge of tears, though the feelings disappear as he watches Simon struggleto sit up. His mouth opens in a silent grunt of pain, so he falls back heavilyagainst the pillows.

This does it for Nahyuta, whopractically stumbles over his own feet to push him deeper in the pillows. Theystare at each other for a moment, and Nahyuta knows his eyes are watering as helooks at Simon so up close and personal for the first time in days. He recallsthe dead look in his eyes when he collapsed into his arms.

“If you’re going to cry, then cry.”

In a flat second, Nahyuta setshimself down on the bed and lets himself sob. In between heaving breaths, hesays, “You can’t be hurt because of me, god, Simon, I can’t let it happen.”

Simon sighs and reaches to pullaway Nahyuta’s hands from his face. He tugs harder on the hands and getsNahyuta to move forward just slightly, so that Simon wraps him in a hug. If ithurts him, he makes no indication of this. Nahyuta is not sure how long theystay like this, but it has to be for quite a long while. When he pulls away,Simon whispers, “God, you’re an ugly crier.”

“I know,” he wheezes.

“Do you feel better?”

“I want you to come back to Khura’inafter this,” Nahyuta blurts out.

“I know – there was never adifferent plan. I was never going to listen to that nonsense, Nahyuta.” Hebrushes his bangs away. “And I cannot make guarantees that I will remainunscathed, just as you cannot make the same promise to me, despite how much Iwould wish you to. Nahyuta,” he states, “I would face this pain ten times overagain if it meant you were unharmed.”

“Don’t say that.”

“I would. And I can’t have youdoubting our love and loyalty for each other when I say this.”

“I never doubted it; I don’t doubt it, currently.” He rubs athis wet eyes. “I hate that I caused you pain.”

“Have I ever told you how trulypainful and hellish being in love with you really is?” Nahyuta bursts out laughing,not expecting the comment. Simon continues, “Yet if I did not think yourstubborn, terrible self and the agony that you bring upon me is not worth this,I would be gone already.”

“I know.”

Simon smiles. “Are you over thisridiculousness now, Nahyuta? Or would you like me stabbed, so you can delivermore bad news?”

“The pain you bring upon me might not be worth it,” he snaps, yet he isunable to keep from smiling softly. Simon does not answer that comment, and heinstead wordlessly gets Nahyuta to lay next to him. His inked hand strokesthrough Simon’s tangled hair, soothingly and gently.

“Will you tell me in detail howpoorly your conversation with my elder sister went?”

“Just so you may laugh at me?”

“Yes.” Simon laughs.

Nahyuta sighs, but he’s never lovedthat laugh more.