#but im bisexual. not because of what some person on the internet defines it as. im bisexual because i said so.

[the-kneesbees]

I mean yeah, ig, I'm still bisexual even though I'm attracted to non binary people because the "technical definition" of the term includes nb folks. but I'm also bisexual because I fucking said so

[captainzigo]

Hi everypony!

My kofi is ko-fi.com/captainzigo if you enjoy my art, consider leaving me a tip! this is otherwise entirely a labor of love so,,,

you can also send a request with your tip! but if you choose to do so, please read the disclaimer later on in this post**

my non-art blog, where i accept asks is @snapewife-divorce-lawyer and my reblog-spam blog is @3amgaypotion also i am on bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/captainzigo.bsky.social

that's a bunch of pictures of my oc(/ponysona) Prickly Pear. she's a cowgirl

Frequent/noteworthy questions below the break

**on donations made to me:

i still dont take commissions currently, but if you send a request with a donation, there's a 99% chance i'll do it. and that remaining 1% i'll probably just ask you for a different request. if you send me a request with a donation you are not sending me a commision. you are making a donation, and i might do you a favor as a result. you do not own the resulting art. and I am under no obligation to complete it or to do it in the way that you like. you do not need to make a donation in order to make a request. i talk more about it here

hello mutuals!

If you are a mutual, DM me for an invite to discord server and subsequently to minecraft server

on sending me asks:

any asks you send me should be like Strongbad emails. one paragraph. no attachments. unless you are sending me refs.

in any interactions, please keep in mind that i am a stranger on the internet and act accordingly.

unless I have explicitly said otherwise, you can safely assume that I do not count you amongst my friends. it is nothing personal, it is in fact the opposite.

why am i like this?

i am autistic. i say this because representation matters, but also because i would like to ask that you please be very frank with me. i don't even really need your patience. just say what you mean and we will get along fine.

can you draw my ocs?

you most certainly can draw any of my ocs. i'd love that acually. tag me

on (re)posting my art:

do not post my art on other platforms. do not repost my art period. I don't really exist on other platforms since i deleted Twitter. So if you see my stuff on other platforms, it's not me. except for my bluesky.

transformative works are obviously allowed, at least here in america where i live. but if you want my blessing, please keep them SFW, and try to keep the spirit of the original artwork

is my blog SFW?

im in my twenties. i keep my blog SFW (as i define it) as a strict rule.

i do not consider the fact that sex exists, that some people enjoy it, or some innuendo to be NSFW. i also do not consider swearing, even as tho a sailor might, to be NSFW.

are NSFW interactions ok?

in short: no. while i have no aversion to to that sort of thing, and often actually enjoy it, i keep this blog SFW. the intention behind my art is to be SFW even when it might be skirting the line. in general, and especially, specifically with mlp, i do not wish to have NSFW interactions on the internet. please respect this boundary.

on shipping:

in my opinion, all romance real or fictional should be between people who are similar in age, doing age appropriate things, not closely related, and all with mutual consent. i am not interested in witnessing or interacting with anything outside of these parameters.

on my blue hair and pronouns:

i am a trans woman. i am also bisexual. i am also poly and demi since im listing things. i am out online becasue i know how important it is to know that you aren't alone.

do i take constructive criticism?

NO 🖕👹🖕 FUCK YOU!!!!!!! GET BLOCKED IDIOT!! unless you are a marginalized person who feels i have unintentionally made you uncomfortable somehow with my art or otherwise. in that case i am sorry and you do me a great favor by calling me out. OTHERWISE FUCK YOU DUMBASS IF YOU DONT LIKE MY ART GO DRAW YOUR OWN 🖕🖕🖕🖕

“i hate bronies”…

i don't necessarily hate you if you self identify with that label. i like to make myself off-putting to keep creeps away. i talk about it more in this post: https://www.tumblr.com/captainzigo/744131513208176640/when-i-say-i-hate-bronies-in-my-header-its

brony?

i don't hold a lot of nostalgia for old brony stuff. infact it's quite the opposite. i was a child when the show came out, and more than that i was a girl. i am not a brony.

do i like g5?

i like all generations of mip including the new stuff. gen 4 is just the one i grew up with

why is my header aurora, bori and alice from the best gift ever?

well that would be because i hate them like a mother hates a child. like the sun hates the moon. like sickly victorian child hates the slightest morsel of bread.

on flurryheart:

i often draw stuff about cozy glow x flurry heart. this is with the understanding that cozy glow spends about a decade turned to stone. nullifying the age gap.

🤓☝️ i think you mean effect, not affect

i am dyslexic. i spell stuff wrong all the time and i type weird. please don't bother correcting me. wooptydoo your brain is wired normally. sending you a medal.

on my username:

i've had the same username since i debuted on the internet. zigo is the name of an oc i made that i dont really talk much about anymore. zigo is a fine enough nickname, and at least one person calls me that irl.

[aro-culture-is]

i think i may be arospec, but idk what to do about it... i id as a bisexual/grayace and the ace part is quite new, only about a year. but, in the past my relos kind of just happened. they asked me out and cuz i showed i mild personal interest/curiousity and didnt say no (cuz i wasnt like "in love") i said yes and we dated. im in another relo and he's SUPER romantic and i dont get it, it kinda makes me feel uncomfortable cuz i dont do it back naturally... does this sound like aspec stuff??

[empty paragraph in case tumblr eats it]

hi!

obligatory: i’m an internet stranger who knows nothing of your personal circumstances other than what you have sent. even if I did know more your identity is yours to chose.

that said, uhhh yeah that matches a fair amount of aro-spec things to me. I tend to define aromanticism strongly around experiencing little to no romantic attraction, and aro-spec as experiencing less than the cultural standard of romantic attraction and/or conditional attraction. from my understanding, as a person who has never felt romantic attraction, most people who are not arospec experience romantic attraction first around the age of 10 or even earlier (though it can be later) and it’s apparently distinct for most individuals.

the fact that you don’t describe that as being part of your dating suggests to me that you don’t necessarily experience that, which, by definition, would make you aro-spec, or more specifically aromantic.

additionally, this is also kinda exactly how I went about dating, including the relationship with someone who’s super romantic and being kinda uncomfortable because it doesn’t feel natural to do it back. I would suggest that you look into the term romance repulsion - and know that it doesn’t have to be an identity modifier, just a phenomena that can occur. it may or may not match your experience, but it is how I’m reading it.

however you feel about the above, I would advise talking to your boyfriend about feeling uncomfortable at times with the super romantic stuff - it’s possible to date as an aro person, even one with some romance repulsion and you don’t have to discuss that immediately if you’re not there yet - but in a healthy relationship there should still be some communication around discomfort.

You could say something like “hey, so you say/do x thing a lot, and (i like that / think it’s nice of you / or even don’t super enjoy it, though i’d leave off the rest then). I’m a little uncomfortable though because I struggle to express it back. Are you looking for a response when you do x? (if yes, maybe ask about what the response might be, alternatives if that’s not comfy with you, or just have an emotionally honest discussion about how you feel with plenty of I statements)”.

I hope this helps! you may also find it useful to scroll through the tag “am i aro”, attached to this post.

- mod kee

disclaimer under readmore:

Hi. I'm an internet stranger. I am one person. I will speak from my personal perspective. I happen to be more visible in the aro community than some, and this puts me in a unique position where I am asked many types of questions. I will do my best, but I am not representative of all aromantic people, or even my specific identities of non-sam or loveless. Sometimes, I might say something and later disagree with that stance. Treat me as the unqualified stranger I am.

[genderfluidtechnoblade]

hello hello i am rose caleb genderfluidtechnoblade and this is my hell. i keep making these posts then not liking them anymore so the rest of my intro is under this cut so i dont have to look at it.

im 20, i’m from texas, and i’m a college student for astronomy and physics. i’m genderfluid, and i use the following pronouns listed in order of likelihood that using that one is right on any given day: they/she/fae/he. switch it up sometimes for funsies and we’re good. i’m bisexual grey-acearo and the grey is for c!techno and my partner.

my all time favorite creator is jordan captainsparklez. my other favorite cc’s are technoblade, fruitberries, petezahhutt, hbomb, scott smajor, quig, and elysaku! casual enjoyer of many others as well.

i engage a lot with: speedrunning, dsmp lore, vault hunters, minecraft events, and miscellaneous videos from creators i follow. there is absolutely no guarantee what you’re going to get on any particular day, it depends on my mood, whats on my dash, and who most recently gave me content that made me feel like a cat being pat gently on the head.

i am opinionated. i am snippy. i am mean. i am fully capable of being fullheartedly frustrated and annoyed with things with deep sociopolitical implications and genuinely problematic content AND petty shit that pisses me, personally, off. i’ll clarify which is which when i go on one of my angry complaining rants, which i will try not to go on too often, but please know: the chance that i will spend the entire day complaining and bitching about a niche issue you may have never heard about is low. but NEVER zero.

A few disclaimers:

𝖚𝖒, 𝖔𝖕 𝖎𝖘 𝖆 𝖈!𝖉𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖒 𝖆𝖕𝖔𝖑𝖔𝖌𝖎𝖘𝖙 not in the sense that i downplay the atrocities of the abuse he put tommy through but in the sense that i believe every person truly does have the ability to move on and change, and that people are not defined by the worst thing they’ve ever done, and even if c!dream never improves and even if he actually gets worse, there is no crime you can commit to justify having your human rights taken away from you and pandora’s vault is a deeply flawed system and i am a prison anarchist and i believe it should burn. AND i am irrationally emotionally attached to this fucking war criminal and if anything bad happens to him i WILL cry.

THIS APPLIES ONLY TO CDREAM WHO IS MY OC I STOLE AWAY AND BELONGS TO ME NOW

c!techno IS right on all accounts. thank you.

i watch traffic series from only scott’s pov because that’s the only one i have time for. i try to stay up to date on other people’s povs and the like, but i’m really only invested in scott, and as such, can’t make any sweeping judgements of any other characters or circumstances that dont revolve around him. thank you for understanding. scott supremacy.

this is a jordan captainsparklez fan blog. if you hate jordan captainsparklez block me. i mean this genuinely and with malice.

if you actively consider yourself a blue9 main- not a casual enjoyer or just someone who enjoyed their pov, someone who really does genuinely consider that this year+ old mcc team is the center of your content... i do not want you here.

it is this blog’s official and professional stance that defending fruitberries on the internet is not enough, and i need a gun.

i have several old posts on illumina that i will not be deleting because i dont believe in deleting posts really, but there will be no more. 

mcc is a wonderful event made with love and attention from some of the nicest and most genuine content creators of the day and age, but it does mess up sometimes and people are allowed to have neutral to negative opinions about mcc. in fact i have some neutral to negative opinions about mcc. mcc is not above criticism but holy shit you guys realize there’s a difference between criticism and death threats right. like. right. RIGHT??

unfortunate owner of a twitter i use only to farm clout from speedrunners. if there is discourse happening on twitter i dont want to hear about it.

talk to me about fwt dsmp canon wedding staged breakup conspiracies.

IF YOU ARE MEAN TO GEOSQUARE YOU GO TO HELL YOU GO DIRECTLY TO HELL DO NOT PASS GO DO NOT COLLECT 200 DOLLARS.  

other than that, yknow. standard if you’re racist i fucking hate you go choke, terfs/truscum eat shit and die, ableists you’re not welcome and never have been, and please understand that while i am unhinged and mentally unstable, at least i’m funny. 

[pollackpatrol]

I thought bi did mean two or more? is that not the right definition? /g

oh no yeah it does. it also means whatever the bisexual person using it to label themself means. (non-bi people dont get to say what bi does or doesnt mean. this includes other mspec people.)

im just like. “are posts talking about how bi has ALWAYS meant 2+ actually panphobic, or did i make that up in my head?”

some context being that there was a movement on tumblr to redefine bisexual as being attracted to only 2 genders. now, if someone were to define their OWN bisexuality like that, then that wouldnt be a problem, but these people were trying to define ALL bisexuality as that. there was also the implication that bi people were only attracted to a persons genitals. then, they brought in pansexuality as an alternative to bisexuality, and the phrase “hearts not parts” became popular. 

or like. thats what im guessing happened. i wasnt there. 

now some context for the context. 

i am going to go out on a limb and say that the people behind this movement were kids or middle schoolers. that, or they otherwise misunderstood both bisexuality and pansexuality. because yes, both were misrepresented here! bisexuality and pansexuality have meant roughly the same thing since the 70s (though from what i can find, pansexual also meant “hey im into some kinky shit”? that definition has kind of fallen out of use though), and in real life non-internet spaces weve been a part of the same community. 

theres also this misconception that the term pansexual originated on tumblr. again, thats false—its held roughly its modern definition since the 70s, and ive heard of people who ID’d as pan in the 90s. and even if it *did* originate on tumblr, that wouldnt make it any less of a valid identity!

okay sorry literally none of this had anything to do with your question. 

TLDR basically yeah but if youre bi and wanna define it another way for yourself then go wild

[1eeminho]

so I'm a bisexual trans man and i have a lot of internal struggles about who I'm "allowed" to be attracted to. my brain is often transphobic to me, and i tell myself that since my body isn't "male" i can't be attracted to gay men. i feel scared to ever foster feelings for gay men because what would they say to me when they found out I'm a "woman"? but at the same time i feel like gay men definitely want a partner with a penis which is valid but that furthers my brain's statement about my "womanhood." but if i think about other trans people, i don't exactly hold the same views. obviously they are valid in their identity. but my brain always tells me I'm not really a man. since i don't look like a cis man, I'm not counted as a man in the eyes and attraction of others. likewise, if I'm interested in a woman my brain tells me those are gay feelings. idk, i just don't know how to fix this. partly i blame the internet, I've been seeing a LOT of transphobes, a lot of jk r*wling. the rest of it is just that I'm confused and mean to myself

hi anon its really good of you to talk about this okay thats so important and im happy you feel save enough to do it here with me <3 since I'm not trans i can only speak from the view of a cis bi woman but I will share my thoughts and maybe some of my trans followers see this and have something to say to help you! so, first of all, as long as the people you are attracted to aren't for example children, you are allowed to be attracted to anyone. attraction is something we cannot control, it just IS, no matter what gender that person has or what gender we identify as. you're allowed to just let yourself be interested in people. second of all, you said right at the beginning of this ask that you are a bi trans man and to me that says it all, you're a man. your brain might tell you otherwise sometimes, but you have obviously consciously considered this and realized that you are a man, no matter the body you have been born in. so you are man, full stop. I can imagine that it must be very difficult to live with this doubt tho! Our brains are very complex of course so when we have internalized ideas and values from society over the years, its very hard to get those out of our heads and they will turn up again and again especially when we try to go against them. You said you saw a lot of transphobic shit especially online and its hard to not let that stuff get to you and get into your head, especially if its something that concerns you personally! but please know that those thoughts, that you're not really a man or that you aren't allowed to be attracted to gay men bc of your body parts, those thoughts are only products of societies narrow-minded and outdated views on what gender and attraction is supposed to be like. having these thoughts doesn't mean they're true, our thoughts don't define us. they just come and go. but! you can consciously let go of these thoughts and not give them any attention. there's a lot I could say about unwanted and intrusive thoughts but it would be too long here rn but talk to me again if u wanna know more! anyway, you're a man, a bisexual man and you're allowed to be attracted to anyone you're attracted to. now, what the other people do is not something you can influence. of course there will be people who prefer one kind of sexual organs over the other but tbh I dont think thats most of them. there are a lot of gay lesbian bi whatever people who just don't really care about genitals. it really depends on the person! and you not having been born into the body of a male sex doesn't mean you're not a man, it simply means you have a different body than a lot of men but at the same time there are a lot of men who have the same body parts you do! so, where im going with this is this: if you identify as a man you're a man and you're allowed to be attracted to anyone, gay men included. what those men feel for you in return depends on them and thats nothing you can influence but it also doesn't invalidate who you are! I'm gonna stop talking here bc this is already so long and I'm not sure I got my point across but do feel free to talk to me again if you feel like it!! you will be okay 💗

[queerandhavingmorefunthanyou]

I was lookin through the Pan discourse tag n I was seein stuff about how being Pan is biphobic n it belittles trans people n i was thinking n I really need a bit of guidance? im young n I cant talk to anybody abt this except for people on the internet. I just needed to know what you think of that, cause I feel like maybe there might be some truth in it but I just, cant see myself as bi. Ive gone through that whole thing before n I cant see myself as anything other than Pan. Its just scary. Help?

hey love! i’d love to talk this out with you.

here is my perspective: the labels "pansexual" and "panromantic" don’t exist to exclude the bisexual, transsexual, or gnc communities because they aren’t trying to say that any of them are "less than" or "wrong". for me personally, i don’t identify as pan because i see trans or gnc people as a separate group from cis people or not included within the bisexual label, but rather because i interpret bisexual as meaning the attraction to two or more gender identities. for me, i don’t feel like that’s specific enough; i’m not attracted to two or more identities, i’m attracted to ALL identities, which is the meaning of the pan label. so pan just felt like it fit better. i believe that there are infinite genders to identify as and when it all comes down to it i don’t care about the gender of my potential partner. i feel like that is more clearly said in the pan label as opposed to the bi label. of course someone could feel the same way as me and identify as bi and that would be completely okay- it all comes down to what feels the most accurate to you personally. so i don’t think pan is exclusionary, i just believe that it is an opportunity for those attracted to more than one gender identity to be more specific about their sexuality. it’s a way to further define oneself.

i’m sorry that you found all of the discourse scary and i hope my perspective helped a bit. all of the love to you❤️🌙

[missblissy]

SO I ACCIDENTLY DELETED THE ASK BUUT! Anon asked about my OCs so here they are ;v;

These are my two important children. I do not have their demon forms drawn out yet because THIS IS A VERY OLD REF OF THEM ((I drew this in 2017. I do not have a working tablet but im GETTING ONE FOR CHRISTMAS SO IM GONNA BE DRAWING AGAIN SOON!! This is just their general bio, not necessarily Hazbin hotel))

Sage Helvig:

Age: 26 Gender: Female Race: Mixed. Japanese/Europen Descent.   Status: Alive Build/Body Type/Physical Frame: Smol Height: 4′9″ Weight: 160 lbs Skin: White Hair: Long black hair that stops above her waist, wavy but little to nose curls Eyes: Blue Other defining features/extra anatomy: Has many piercings on her ears, both ears are completely covered with piercings. Voice: Soft-spoken and relatively monotone. Doesn’t express a lot of emotions when speaking. Often mistaken for being tired. Style: POP PUNK!!! EDGY!!! EMO!!!!

Loves/Favorites: - Tol Husband - Magic/Pagan worship - Japanese cuisine and culture - Archery/Bowhunting - Studying Mythology - Pepsi ((She’s addicted)) - ALL BREAKFAST FOOD - And fruits. She prefers fruit over candy - Chemistry - Cleaning ((It’s a form of therapy for her)) - Science ((in general)) - Crabs ((She keeps them as pets and thinks they are the cutest things every)) - Winter and Fall - Swords/Daggers/Blades

Hates: - Candy, like unnaturally sweet things ((like taffy, lemon drops, sour patch kids, etc etc)) - Math - Cooking - Most internet culture. - Evil/Dark spirits/Demons ((Anything malevolent)) - People who don’t know how to shut up about cars - Bugs - Spring and Summer

Hobbies: - Studying different culture’s mythology/history/religions. - Witchcraft/Spellcasting - Demon slaying - Archery - Chemistry - Swordsmanship

Hopes/Dreams: - To one day rid the world of all demonic and malevolent spirits. - Have a daughter of her own and raise her the way she was raised - To become a skilled and honorable Demon Slayer

Fears/Nightmares: - Anything bad happening to Van or her brother - Death - Demonic possession ((Ya know, being possessed and shit)) - Hurting the innocent. - Getting sent to Hell

Best Quality: - She is a skilled Demon Slayer who has seen more combat than the average person. She used a mix of a short bow, rapier and magical abilities when hunting and fighting demons and spirits Greatest Flaw: - She doesn’t put enough trust and faith into those around her. She struggles with taking on to much at once and burning herself out. She tries to hard to fix everything by herself and tends to push the people she cares most away from her. How does the character picture himself/herself? - She doesn’t see or view herself as the legend she is slowly becoming. She’s very humble and feels as though she is at the bottom of the ladder when it comes to anything she does. There is always room for improvement. How do others see him/her? - One of the best Demon Slayers there are out there, many people are fame struck when the come meet her because she is from a long demon slayer that dates back to some of the earliest centries of human culture and society. This causes her and Van to move a lot.

Most valued possession: - The rapier sword that she was gifted too by her father as he died from a fatal wound during a battle with a demon. It is the same rapier sword that she used to kill said demon that murdered her father.

Is he/she motivated by possibility or necessity? - Necessity. She knows that she is needed because there are so few people left on the planet with gifts like hers ((I.e Magical abilities)) How does he/she view the future and/or the past? - Sage thinks there is a grim future for humanity and has little faith in those around her. She tries not to think about the past either but uses it as motivation to keep moving forward. What is his/her philosophy on life and death? - She fears death more than anything, only because she doesn’t know what kind of afterlife she will have. Sage doesn’t think death is the end, and believe there is life beyond death. She wants to live as long as she can, possibly growing old with Van. What kind of energy level do they usually have? Sleepy and depressed. She’s not a bubbly person and is very serious and stoic and quiet.

Does he/she have a temper? Yes but only if you push her to the edge or if she’s been cornered in some way.

Polite or rude? Rude Stingy or generous? Generous Leader or a follower? Leader More happy by themselves or in a group? By herself What is his/her sexual preference/experience/values? - Sage is bisexual, monogamous, and demisexual. Before she married Vanderlinde she dated both men and women. She doesn’t sleep around and find causal sex repulsive ((for her, she doesn’t care what other people do with their sex lives)) -History/Background- - Sage was born from a Japanese mother and a German father. She was born in Japan but her family moved around every few years due to being members of a secret society dedicated to exterminating demons. Her mother is still alive however her father died when she was 17 years old in a fatal battle with a Demon. - She has spent almost her entire life working for a secret society of demon slayers, which she took on as a full-time job after her father died. - Sage has an older half brother named Kael, they share the same mother but a different father. - She received formal schooling through the secret soceity she worked for. She was able to still get her high school education while traveling around the world to slay demons. - She met Vanderlinde when she was 20 years old and after just moving to the United States. Vanderlinde was a priest at the time and Sage had just enrolled in university for a chemistry degree. They quickly fell in love and Sage welcomed Vanderlinde into her secret society with open arms and Vanderlinde happily joined.

((There is so much more to Sage’s backstory I’m just TIRED and SLEEPY so this is all ya’ll get.))

___________________________________________

Vanderlinde Helvig:

Age: 31 Gender: Male Race: Cucasion, Scandinavian descent. Status: Alive Build/Body Type/Physical Frame: Tol Height: 6′0″ Weight: 230 lbs Skin: White Hair: Short blonde fluffy hair Eyes: Green Other defining features/extra anatomy: He has several tattoos, all of them are based of Nordic Mythology, Nordic Ruins, and Scandinavian Vikings Voice: Deep but soothing. Imagine what butter would sound like if it could talk.SMOOTH Style: Business Causal, he’s a professor so he wears a lot of dress shirts and sweaters. This boy loves his cashmere sweaters.

Loves/Favorites: - His smol wife - Music ((He loves pop punk, rock, grunge, metal, etc etc)) - THE LORD ALL MIGHTY - Sunday Prayer - His Students - Teaching - Nordic Mythology - Cooking - PEACE AND LOVE - Coffee and tea. - Summer and Fall - Going to concerts/rock shows - Motorcycles

Hates: - Spring and Winter - Unnecessary arguments/debates - People who refuse to educate themselves - Lazy Students - Grading paper work - People who don’t know how to drive - Demonic/Evil Spirits - Pepsi ((He’s a Coke-a-cola person)) - Alcohol ((And Drunk people. If you are drunk he won’t even try and talk to you))

Hobbies: - Reading - Writing ((He’s written many books about religious study books)) - Exploring the unknown ((He breaks your modern Indiana Jones tbh lmao)) - Providing Exorcisms/religious healing/cleanings - Working out/staying fit - Researching religions and mythology

Hopes/Dreams: - WORLD PEACE - That everyone can be happy and treated equally - To destroy every demonic/evil spirit - To have a child one day, just one. Doesn’t matter if it’s a boy or a girl he’ll love them the same. - To be recognized worldwide for his work and struggles.

Fears/Nightmares: - Losing Sage ((In any way. Like if she’s killed or if she leaves him etc etc.)) - Becoming possessed and harming people. - The Devil/Lucifer/Satan - Demonic spirits ((He’s always afraid of them even if he’d confronted by them)) - Heights/Being up high - The ocean

Best Quality: - Vanderlinde is a very mild-mannered person. It’s hard to piss him off, he’s very calm and collective and has incredible control over his emotions. People often describe him with a “healing” personality and an “open mind.” Greatest Flaw: - He lets his fears control him. Too often he runs away from things that quiet literally scare him. He is not a fighter and doesn’t enjoy fighting, he’d rather run away defend himself or those around him. This often leads people to say he is cowardly. How does the character picture himself/herself? - Vanderlinde sees himself as a weak softy who can’t win a single physically fight. He doesn’t have a lot of self-confidence so he doubts himself and his skills way too much. He thinks he a push-over that anyone could walk all over. How do others see him/her? - Many people view Vanderlinde as an incredibly intelligent and kind professor who cares about his student’s education more than anything in the world. ((Next to his love for Sage)) People describe him as a very kind and loving person with a big heart.

Most valued possession: - His rosary, he carries it with him always. It was a gift to him from a priest that change his views on Christianity and other religions.

Is he/she motivated by possibility or necessity? - Necessity. Vanderlinde knows there aren’t enough people in the world fighting the dark forces. He knows it is his duty to educate the masses about what is going on when no one is looking. How does he/she view the future and/or the past? - Vanderlinde hopes for a pretty and peaceful future, a safe world where his child can grow up without fear. What is his/her philosophy on life and death? - Vanderlinde does not fear death, he knows that he is going to Hell anyway, so he might as well enjoy his life to the fullest until that day comes. What kind of energy level do they usually have? He’s very relaxed, calm and cool. He’s known for wearing a comforting smile and using healing words to lift people up and make them feel better about themselves.

Does he/she have a temper? No. Vanderlinde has incredible control over his emotions. Even when he’s pissed off he’s still nice, happy, and trying his best to please others.

Polite or rude? Polite Stingy or generous? Generous Leader or a follower? Leader More happy by themselves or in a group? By himself What is his/her sexual preference/experience/values? - Vanderlinde is a straight monogamous male. He’s experimented before here and there but he prefers women for the most part. He is very private about his sex life and gets very uncomfortable when people talk/ask about it. -History/Background- - Vanderlinde grew up in an orphanage for wayward boys, he never knew his parents and refuses to look into them. He was born in the United States. He doesn’t want to know why or how he ended up at the orphanage. It was run by a Catholic church, where he grew up with a deep faith in the Lord. He began to question his faith when the Priest he looked up to had passed away. - Around 18 years old Vanderlinde left the orphanage and went on a soul searching journal across the United State. He was homeless during this time as he traveled cross country, drinking, doing drugs and learning about all different types of faith. When he turned 20 he turned back to the Church and became a priest for the next five years. - He met Sage when he was 25, she was 20 at the time. Because she was a pagan witch, Vanderlinde was punished for getting himself involved with her. At the same time, he also got in trouble for researching other religions other than Christianity. He chose to renounce his priesthood and left the church because he did not agree with their rules. After that, Vanderlinde worked towards becoming a professor at the local university where he could freely research and teach others - After he fell in love with Sage, Vanderlinde joined her secret society, more than happy to join a cause he believed in and was willing to fight for.

((Again, there is so much more to Vanderlinde’s back story but Im just so tired and I wanted to quickly summarize the 20 pages I have for these two dorks.))

[the-queer-look]

Shay my name

Often we are criticised, and belittled, for the new terms which we are using to fully describe our identities. It may sound weird to those who’ve never had to think about their own, but at least in English, we have the language to describe what we’re talking about. In some places around the world, there literally aren’t words to fully describe someone’s identity, and that can leave people feeling isolated.

- K

Name: Shay

Age: 27

Gender/Orientation:Agender, gray asexual

Occupation:Digital Designer

Location:Strathfield

I’m from Vietnam originally, and have been in Australia for about eight years. I went to an international college in Vietnam; That school got into some trouble with the government and got shut down, they decided to move all the students to either Singapore or Australia to finish their bachelor degree, and I decided to come here, and liked it so much that I decided to stay. I’ve been working professionally here for the last five or six years now.

In Asia, especially Vietnam and Thailand, there’s this thing where even in a relationship between two queer people, there’s a hierarchical thing where one person is considered a man, and the other a woman, and I never understood that. But thanks to the internet, I looked into it and read a whole lot and came across the concept of non-binary, and it just felt right, and really liberating. I embraced it, and now I feel like a person, defined by myself, rather than defined by my gender, that my physical body is just a vessel for me to experience the world. Identifying as non-binary helps me be free-er.

The internet is massively influential. There’s all this information that you cant necessarily find anywhere else. In my particular situation, I had to use the internet to find out what other cultures and communities were doing and saying about these things. Theres no way to refer to people in the Vietnamese language without specifying their gender, so when I go home, people in the Queer community tend to use male pronouns for me, because I tend to present more masculine, but the internet helped me to realise that theres more than that – there’s “They” which has been an accepted non gendered pronoun since the 1500s for example, which just felt so much more comfortable for me. Just having access to this knowledge through the internet give you so much power, and so much personal agency.

Because im a small person, it’s rather tricky to get the clothes that I want. I like mens clothes because, for one, they have pockets! And for another, although I love the feminine side of myself, I feel like the fashions that are associated with femininity don’t represent me particularly well. When I was Eighteen, I started experimenting by buying mens clothing, but more and more these days, I’m finding myself comfortable in buying and wearing either masculine or feminine clothing, depending on how well it works with my wardrobe. Because I work in the tech industry, I have a bit more leeway to express myself, so anything that lets me hit that non-binary spot is great. And as I’ve grown more comfortable in myself, and my identity, I’m letting myself branch out from this stricter, all black, all neutral expression, and be a bit more lively with colours and patterns that I wouldn’t have felt comfortable in before.

When I came to terms with being non-binary, I didn’t have the words to explain it in my mother tongue, but in a more progressive environment, like Australia, you can explain it very simply, very quickly, and because the language to explain it is easier to use, its much easier for people to understand, even if they haven’t heard of the concept before. It’s still a struggle though, people are always staring at me, trying to figure out my gender, I get yelled at in public bathrooms, but at least having a word that legitimises my identity is a big step forward.

The culture of Asia is so gendered that I already have a hard time explaining homosexuality to my mother, but I’ve never approached the subject of my gender identity with them because they don’t have the words to actually discuss the topic, and when I explain it to my friends, they’re quite taken aback, because the culture is so defined along gendered lines. Like I was saying before, if you have a lesbian couple, whichever one presents more masculine is referred to with masculine pronouns, and assumed to take on more masculine roles. When I explain my identity to them, they ask me why I have to define myself that way, instead of just saying that I’m a butch woman. And I need to explain to them that I don’t actually identify as a woman at all. It’s difficult, but also I feel like its a duty for someone in a position like myself, which is having the privilege of living in a western country, but also going back home to a more conservative country and spread what I’ve learned so that others can see identity as a whole rather than splitting people into boxes.

Human brains always try to put people in boxes, and define things. In reality, everything exists on a spectrum and everyone moves back and forth and changes all the time. I know that once I was able to identify and understand this, that I began to have a different view, not just on stereotypes within the queer community, but stereotypes in general. Stereotypes exist for a reason, they exist because it makes it easier for our brains to navigate the world, and I think that’s fine, but at the same time everyone needs to understand how people change constantly. The stereotypes are fine, but you can’t just be defining someone completely based off of a stereotype, you need to be able to take a step back and understand that they are a multi faceted human being. Although it’s useful to have these archetypes to define yourself by, it’s counterproductive to define someone externally based on a stereotype.

My partner and I were bingeing Xena, and having these conversation about why we never talked at the time about how this show was about two queer women leading their lives and having adventures and being wholesome about the whole thing? But we found that the studios in the 90’s went through and censored everything about their relationship. Reading the comics though, where there’s no censorship like that was really uplifting and validating. It’s not a non-binary person, obviously, but the representation of a bisexual woman having a wholesome relationship with another woman feels so validating that our identity is not being erased or oppressed every day because people cant handle how different we are for not fitting into the boxes that society has made for us. The question is, why didnt we have these role models of queer people, showing us these healthy relationships, and healthy intimacy. Why did we get The L Word instead? Don’t get me wrong, I love The L Word, but also, it’s trash, in the way that it presents these ideas of queer relationships, its a bit toxic. They’re coming back with a new season, however many years after the fact, and I’m so glad that they seem to have learned lessons about appropriate representation, for example they’re having an asian trans man, playing an asian trans character, which is great. I feel that when you don’t have appropriate representation for yourself, kids get the wrong ideas about the world, like how The L Word gave the wrong idea about how the community works to a lot of young lesbians, including myself, back when that’s how I identified. And then there’s the “i cant see myself successful because I’m a queer person” mentality. Kid’s are dying out there and thinking that they cant achieve the sort of success in their lives that they want to achieve, simply because they’re a part of the queer community, which is horrible.

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[radiqueer]

I’ve been trying to figure out how to contribute to the “born this way” conversation, but I’m not fully sure how to articulate my ideas. For me I feel like my identity... like I feel I was “born this way” like I’ve had intermittent dysphoria for as long as I can remember. But also as far as mspec labels go I could ID as pan, or poly, or Omni, but I’ve always felt bi fits and that’s the identity I choose. My partner tho, feels that they, more than anything, chose to be bi (1/2)

My partner feels that they had no inclination towards being anything other than a straight man until well into their thirties, when, due to a lot of factors, they decided any company was good company and decided to see if they liked being with men. They had a good experience, and they feel they could have left it at that but CHOSE to continue to pursue their attraction to men, and then much more recently, in doing their own research about gender identity and being around me (2/3 oops)

They chose to question their gender identity (which as of right now is inconclusive), and my partner feels happy as a bi questioning person, but also felt happy as a straight man and could have remained so but chose to be happy a different way. Idk it’s complicated/messy and I don’t really get it but it’s how my partner feels and I believe them. And then Political lesbianism is a thing. Idk it’s hard for me to wrap my head around I wish I could contribute more. It’s def not one size fits all tho

this makes a ton of sense, thanks for sharing!

I feel like - in a lot of ways, being queer and identifying as queer changed me as a person. it changed everything, from the way I think about and approach new topics, the way I see myself and the world, my politics, my tastes in books and art. queerness is fundamental to me, but I can conceive not being queer. if I didn’t know it was an option to identify this way, if I didn’t grow in a home that encouraged me to question and pursue new avenues, I would be a different person. and I cannot with any certainty say that I would definitely identify as queer at some point, if not at 14 then at 17, 19, 25, 40. I think I am happier for being queer, because it is relieving to share an experience and a community (things which have been difficult for me in the past) with people who love and support me. I like having a voice and an opinion on issues. I like my politics. I don’t like being discriminated against, but who does?

there are so many ways to have a fluid identity. you can be the same person all your life with the same experiences and label yourself differently over time. like your partner. one could be happy in one’s assigned roles but happier in a different set that they sought out and choose (kudos to your partner for keeping an open mind and allowing themselves to be happy in a non-normative way, btw), you can have a fluid identity that changes with time, you can be one thing and identify as another, you can refuse a labels on principle, you can be a political lesbian (or it’s equivalents, I suppose? I don’t know if we have something analogous to political lesbianism in other queer subgroups. I think certain parts of the ace community are the closest we’ve come) 

the problem is the idea that there’s only one way to be and feel about queerness and identity and labels. which, IME, is what the BTW crowd seeks to do - normalise us because we are an expression of naturally occurring human diversity. we deserve equality because we are people, just slightly different, and we didn’t choose to be this way any more than you did. it’s not our fault! give us some money! [/s]

people who are written over by this narrative, in no particular order:

questioning people who don’t even know whether they’re straight - they may or may not be

nb people who are often told we are special snowflakes, a symptoms of the excesses of liberal/left wing politics. that we wouldn’t exist if not for the internet [true of me if not for you / ymmv]

bisexual and mspec people

people with fluid identities

people who choose to present a certain way

political [orientation]

people who are choosing to not labels themselves out of fear

people whose identity is informed by trauma

etc

the problem is the dichotomy that seems to be essential to this debate - that you can only have one or the other, that people on one side keep trying to erase the opposing narrative. I frankly don’t know. I’ve only been a part of this debate for a few months and all my thoughts about BTW are informed by personal experience and what I have stumbled across on tumblr. not a comprehensive start by any means. but ime it’s always the BTWs who are trying to shove differing narratives away, and not the choicers. maybe @korrasera and i have different experiences! in fact, I think we have very different experiences 

The problem I’m trying to highlight, the whole reason I made this post, is that I’ve never seen someone suggest that only BTW is valid. In fact, the only times I’ve ever seen people discussing BTW was to specifically suggest that we have to do whatever we can to erase it as an idea because they perceive it as being inherently exclusionary, as though the existence of people who were BTW meant that people could not be queer, gay, lesbian, or trans without having been born in that state. I think it’s a reasonable assumption to consider such intentions as being somewhat noble, since they’re meant to criticize and deconstruct social constructs of legitimacy, but I literally never see the topic raised without it being ‘let’s get rid of the idea that BTW people exist, it’s not true and it hurts the cause’. 

[emphasis added all mine; taken from this post]

I have a different experience. I’ve seen BTW discussed as the only right way to be, and not only by exclusionists (I wouldn’t be able to find receipts on this - I remade my blog recently, and lost all my likes and the people I was following). even when I talk to people irl, I’m forced to resort to a narrative I don’t have any stake in to get my point across, a narrative that doesn’t help me. it’s frustrating and alienating. and I still don’t think we should do away with BTW. I think we make room for people like me to exist and talk, and define clearly what it means so more people can figure out whether or not they fit.

I read around some while I was writing this post, so here’s some stuff tangential but essential to my thoughts:

this post about the relationship of radfems to what constitutes essential womanhood

this post by the same user about why some people may choose a certain labels

another post by the same user

this post, which possibly everyone has read, but I was thinking about this part (emphasis mine)

My girlfriend Marna has been a queer activist since the late 80s. She’s told me about the incredible deliberation and debates LGBTQ+ activists had, in the late 90s and early 00s as the community began to see past the AIDS crisis and immediate goals of “surviving a plague” and “burying our dead.” There were a lot of things we wanted to achieve, but we had to decide how to allocate our scarce reserves of money, labour, publicity, and public goodwiil. Those were the discussions that decided the next big goals we’d pursue were same-sex marriage equality and legal recognition of medical gender transition.

From hearing her tell it, it seems like it was actually a wrenching decision, because it absolutely left a lot of people in the dust. A lot of people, her included, had broad agendas based on sexual freedom and the rights of people to do whatever they wanted with their bodies and consenting partners—and they agreed to put their broader concerns aside and drill down, very specifically, onto the rights of cis gays and lesbians to marry, and the ability to legally change your sex and gender.

As a political tactic it was terrifically effective. […]

Activists of 20 years ago chose to sideline and diminish efforts to blur and abolish the gender binary. Efforts to promote alternative family structures, including polyamorous families and non-sexual bonds between non-related adults. Efforts to fight the Christian cultural message that sex is dirty, sinful, bad, and in need of containment. Efforts to promote sexual pleasure as a positive good.

I couldn’t tell you why these posts stuck out to me while I was writing this, but they do a better job, by and large, of contextualising what I’ve said here

[i-am-me-deal-with-it]

I am Demi

let me explain.

i am Demi. meaning that I am both Demisexual, and Demiromantic.

I've heard it said many times that it's hard to realize that you are asexual. and I wholeheartedly agree. Demisexuality is a subset of asexuality. those who identify as demisexual experience little to no sexual attraction, or if they do it's only after a strong emotional bond has formed, such as being friends with someone for a long time, or possibly going through a emotionally bonding experience. demiromantic is the same principle except when it says “sexual attraction” change it to “romantic interest”

it took me months and months and years to realize that I was demi. and even now I look at myself and worry at night that im just broken.

i never had many friends growing up, living in the middle of nowhere utah it is several miles to the nearest person my age/grade, and even then, they were in a different ward than me. out here in utah, the LDS religion is very strong, and it unifies people who live nearest each other, forming a strong tight knit community. sadly because of that, it can be isolating as well. and because I didn't have friends in my ward, it translated into having no friends in school either.

because of this I turned to books, I read several books a week, I didn't watch TV or movies because I would rather read. slowly I found that I enjoyed reading books that were filled with action and adventure, rather than romance. I didn't like reading books where  a major subplot was romance. I would rather the characters be friends for a while, and then slowly I would begin shipping them. I figured this was normal, because it didn't seem right to me that two people could look at each other, and immediately have feelings of lust towards the other person. it seemed irrational to me.

when I got to middle school, and was able to go from a tiny elementary school to a much larger one I finally found some friends who didn't mind that I lived 10 minutes away. in fact their first question to me wasn't “where do you live?” and it wasn't until months later that they learned exactly how far away I lived. but that didn't bother them, these people became my friends and stayed my friends for nearly 6 years now. and during that time I watched my friends develop goo goo eyes for each other, pine away at their crush from a distance, work up the nerve to tell them, go on a few dates, then a messy break up, and the cycle would repeat two weeks later. during that time, I never developed a single crush on anyone. and no one had a crush on me. I shrugged it off if it even got brought up and tried to excuse it away with humour or saying that my time would come eventually. then at night I would lay in bed staring at the ceiling and wonder if I was broken, and if anyone would ever love me.

eventually, someone did. a guy L told me that he loved me, we had been friends for a while and I said that I thought I liked him too. to this day I don't know if I lied back then. the first few months were a blur of us mostly getting to know each other better, hanging out, and him becoming my closest friend. he was okay for me to take things at my own pace, and it was nearly 6 months before I told him that I loved him back. during that time I began to fall for him, and I found that the longer we were apart, the harder it would be for me.i just needed to be close to him. we were together for 3 years. we broke up the summer before my senior year of high school. over the course of our relationship I realized that I stopped calling him “boyfriend” in my mind. he just became L. he had a problem with keeping his room clean at home, and when his parents decided to move he had problems trying to clean his room so they could pack up. so his parents grounded him from me. he could do anything he wanted except spend time with me, hoping that I would be able to whip him into cleaning his room faster. the first weeks were the hardest, then as time went by, I realized that I didn't need him as much anymore. I could handle the distance, and I could handle not seeing him.  after 5 months, I realized that I wasn't in love anymore. and I began to see that I wasn't as in love as I had been those first few months. I convinced his parents to let me see him for a few hours, telling them that I would help them pack. and the two of us talked. he had thought that I was insane. I tried to explain to him how I was feeling, and he told me that he felt as though I had lied to him. I left his house that night in good standing with him and his parents. and drove the 15 min back to my house, feeling just as stable as I had beforehand.

when I told my mom what happened that night, she was full of emotions. she was worried and scared and a bit hysterical. she was afraid of how I was going to feel “once it hits me” that my best friend, and my boyfriend of 3 years was gone.

we waited for the tears to come. we waited for the emotions. they never came.

to this day I haven't cried about it, or had one day that I felt sorry that we broke up. I remember a quote from Peter and the Starcatcher. “it's supposed to hurt, that's how you know it meant something.” I guess it didn't really mean anything.

after that I continued life as normal. and everyone was surprised that I was taking it so well, but as college admissions drew closer and classes began to wrap up, everyone forgot about it. but I didn't.

for weeks I would wonder why I didn't feel anything. why the spark that had grown had faded so suddenly and left me feeling fine.

not knowing what to do I turned to the internet, and learned about asexuality. I realized while reading people descriptions of what asexuality is to them, and what is defined as being asexual, that I was reading a close description of how I felt on a daily basis. I was dumbfounded. however there were a few small parts that didn't fit, namely, that I had found someone that I was romantically attracted to, and eventually I was sexually attracted as well, although those feelings were very weak in comparison to other peoples. that's when I found out about demisexuality and demiromantics. again it felt as though I was reading a description of how I felt. but still I was afraid that I was just broken.

it's been over a year since I found out what demisexual/romantic means. and nearly 10 months since I decided to embrace the term as a way to define me. and yet, I have only “come out” to a small handful of people. my mom, my little sister, my best friend, and my soon-to-be-fiance.

that's right, I've found someone who loves me, and who I love. we met through my next door neighbour. I live in my college’s dorms and my neighbour is a friend from high school, the first day we met we were all talking and joking about flirting and relationships and stuff. my boyfriend, I, said that he was Bisexual, and that he though both me and my (male) friend were pretty cute, I then said, offhandedly, that I was Demi. he gave me a small look, but didn't press questions. I learned later that he didn't know what it meant but didn't want to pry, and after he learned what it was he was sad because he was starting to like me and was scared that I'd never like him back. but he decided that even if he couldn't “pursue me romantically” he could at least be my friend. after a while I realized that I began to fall for him. and when I said so, he was ecstatic. we haven't been apart since, and we hope to get married soon.

he knows that I don't feel romantic/sexual emotions as strongly as he does. he knows that when we kiss, I don't feel the same way he does. to me, a kiss is a lot like holding hands. its sweet because of the meaning behind the gesture, but its just two body parts touching. however I know that to him each kiss means alot, and makes him happy. so I do my best to kiss him as often as I can. many nights I still worry if im broken. I'm scared that he will leave me because a nice conversation gives me more joy and pleasure than a kiss. and when I worry he is there to keep me company, and help me feel whole.

if you ever feel like this. that's okay. you are not broken. you are not worthless. you will find the thing in life that will give you happiness too. it could be a job, a pet, a book or fandom. or it could be a partner. even if you have a romantic/sexual partner that doesn't mean that you aren't Demi anymore. and being demi, isn't all that bad after all.

[punkcherries]

get ready to rrrrrumble

jesus christ this is a long ass submission so uh puts it in a read more also puts my txt in bold so its easier to read 👍

Right, so I’ve just read everything that happened in the last few asks you got and I’m just gonna sit down and tell you this right now. You better strap the fuck in because this is long and if you’re not gonna read it, shame on you, because all of this is specifically about YOU and the problems people have with you (the people Blu mentioned). First off, I’m not Blu, so don’t go and start calling him names in your server because you’re finally, FINALLY, being called out on all the bullshit you do. I used to be your friend, I left on semi-good terms, and this entire thing is going to explain WHY I left + why you need to square the fuck up.

sounds like fun whoever u are

You need to get your shit together and seriously change yourself, but of course you’re not gonna do that, because you’re an incompetent piece of shit who has your head so far up your ass you can’t see all the things you do wrong. You act like you’re the person who suffers the most, and that anytime anyone is rude to you it’s THEIR fault, not the fact that you did something terrible to someone or that you started some drama. I’ve been fed up with this shit for months, and have been hesitant to say anything directly to your face, because you don’t even know me that well and we hardly talked. We did interact a few times, but those few times were absolute hell to me, because I must have literally retracted some kind of disease just from being near you. You are the fucking EMBODIMENT of tumblrina, and it’s so fucking sad because you weren’t like this before (based on what a few others have told me).

the use of tumblrina here is jus makin me laugh ur a funny guy buddy but i feel like my past self is worse thn my current self like past me participated in cringe culture so like ew

The way you talk? Absolutely fucking horrid. Sit the fuck up and talk like a normal goddamn human being. I’m here to talk to you, not to decipher some 57 commas and abhorrid shortening of words. Jesus fucking Christ Sombre, I can understand Internet slang and cutting some words up, but you fucking butcher the English language so bad it literally sounds like a toddler having a stroke while mashing at their keyboard. It’s “that” not “tht”, it’s “thing” not “thng”, it’s “something” not “smth”, and for GOD FUCKING SAKES IT’S “THE” NOT “TH”. ARE YOU LITERALLY SO FUCKING LAZY THAT YOU CAN’T EVEN TYPE “THE”, A THREE LETTER WORD. I don’t give a shit if you’re talking like this to sound like an anxious uwu tumblr piece of SHIT, it sounds fucking IDIOTIC and it’s an ABSO-FUCKING-LUTE PAIN TO READ.

language is fake and is mostly just sounds we give meaning, im very sorry if you have trouble reading the way i type and id be more than happy to try and not speak to you like i usually do to everyone else if you just asked politely and talked it out with me (tho the idiotic part is accurate im not very smart lmao)

SPEAKING OF YOUR TUMBLR, LET’S TALK ABOUT YOUR UPSET.TXT TAG. If you think anyone is gonna pity you, SPOILER ALERT! THEY’RE FUCKING NOT. Unless they’re your shitty “friends”, NOBODY fucking gives a shit, alrighty? Speaking from my perspective and a few others, nobody’s gonna see this venting on their dashboard and give two shits. Unless they’re your mutuals, they won’t care and it just leaves a bad impression. It’s pathetic how when ANYTHING negative happens to you, you decide to take to Tumblr to boo hoo crypost about it. You wanna vent? You wanna cry yourself to sleep? Cool, talk about it on your server, NOT FUCKING TUMBLR, WHERE LITERALLY ANYONE CAN SEE IT. This is just like how Facebook used to be, you see these posts of people posting personal shit and getting bit in the ass for it later, YEAH WELL THAT’S WHAT’S HAPPENING TO YOU RIGHT NOW BUDDY. DON’T LIKE IT? DON’T FUCKING VENT ON TUMBLR.

i rarely vent on here dude like?? do you see the time gaps between the posts in my vent tag? its also my blog so i can post whatever i like as long as im not hurting anyone yo, plus the point of venting for me at least isnt to like get attention or sympathy its to let off some steam not to mention most to all of my vent posts are vague as hell so like…. why do you even care though?? if i get bit in the ass then thats my problem not yours

Right, so let’s talk about your “im gay” tag too! You identify as male, correct? That’s cool! Congrats. But you’re not gay if you clearly show an interest in girls. Doesn’t matter if they’re fictional or not. Your “im gay” tag is filled with girls (Bismuth, some anime girl, pinup girls). NEWSFLASH ASSHOLE! You’re male, those are females! Opposite genders! That means you’re NOT GAY! WOAAAAAH! So who are you to be reblogging and posting all this shit about how hetero people are the devil, hetero people are the worst wah wah, when you yourself identify as a guy and clearly seem to be interested in girls, even if just a little?

dude i used to identify as nonbinary i only recently started identifying as male, hell i used to identify as female ages back so like? the posts in that tag are most to all old and i do realize my attraction to girls isnt gay, hence why ive only been referring to my attraction to dudes as me being gay post-male identification i guess

Speaking of all the heterophobic shit you reblog, have you not considered it could make some of your followers feel absolutely terrible? I’m bi myself, I like both guys and girls, but holy FUCK when I see that shit on your blog it makes me feel guilty for liking guys at all! Is that how you want people to feel? Whether they’re pan, bi, or straight, that shit’s literally so fucking damaging and it sure as hell hurts to see! And don’t throw that “some of those posts are jokes” bullshit at me, because guess the fuck what! They may be jokes to people who aren’t hetero, but they sure as hell don’t seem like jokes to those who are! How would you feel if I made a joke that was even SLIGHTLY negative towards homosexuals? Wait, no, don’t answer that, because I already know how you’d feel. You’d get pissy, you’d stomp your little baby feet over to Tumblr, and then crypost about it, saying you’re facing homophobia and being harassed blah blah blah.

HETEROPHOBIC IM LAUGHING…. buddy…. pal…. heterophobia is fake and im very sorry if those post make you feel bad as a bisexual person (im also bi so) but heterophobia isnt actually a thing, comparing jokes directed at straight people to lgbtphobia is inherently lgbtphobic as it compares little jokes most to all directed at bigoted/ignorant straights to something that can often result in the actual literal death of hundreds of people for their gender/orientation- that doesnt happen to straight people dude

Also: you don’t have autism. Were you officially diagnosed? Because I’m gonna be real fuckin’ honest, it doesn’t sound like you have autism. You sure have something, hoh yeah, but it’s sure as hell not autism. You put your “autism” up on a pedestal and act like it’s one of the only things about you, like no hunty, your mental illness doesn’t define you. Nobody gives a shit, okay? Your mental illness isn’t an excuse to act like a literal fuckface, it’s not an excuse to treat people like shit, and it sure as hell isn’t an excuse to blame everything on others and make yourself out to be the good guy because “my autism made me anxious or forget things ;w;”. This is the exact kind of tumblrina thing I’m talking about, people on this goddamn website act like their mental illness is the only quality about them and that not being neurotypical makes them special. NEWS-FUCKIN-FLASH, it doesn’t. It really doesn’t. You don’t see me using my mental illness as an excuse for my actions, because I actually step the fuck up and take responsibility for shit I’ve caused. My mental illness does not define me. There’s more to me than that. You need to realize that your fake-ass autism isn’t an excuse for you to be a fucking asshole to the people around you, and that your actions do have consequences. Stop blaming others for shit you’ve caused, stop calling people jackasses when it’s YOU who’s insulting people and twisting the truth, and for the love of God tell your white knights of friends to shut the FUCK up if they don’t know all the details of a situation.

i was technically diagnosed albeit in a nontraditional fashion (a psych at our middleschool was the one who diagnosed me) and i have never defined myself solely by my autism nor have i used it as an excuse for my fuck ups, ive literally apologized and stopped doing the things i did since the blu incident, i recognize i fucked up there and i apologized and i havent done the whole lying out of anxiety thing since, also my white knights of friends??? YOURE the one coming into MY inbox to tell me how shit i am after i blocked blu i literally just want this to be over leave me alone dude

Alright, so now that we’re done talking about YOU, let’s talk about your fandoms. You like Osomatsu-San. Okay, that’s fine. What’s not fine is how FUCKING obsessive you are about it. There’s nothing wrong with liking something and being attached to characters, making art of it, having a blog, reblogging it, talking about it, that’s okay. That’s okay! But you? You fucking hold the characters so close and act like they’re your own characters. You get upset when something doesn’t go your way in the show. This was evidenced by how many times you’ve complained about episodes (guess where? upset.txt) after they’ve come out. That anon about the straight joke? You got so heated over that, didn’t you? Saying Chibita was “out of character”, BITCH, what do you fucking know? He’s not your goddamn character! The writers will write him however the fuck they want. It’s THEIR fucking show, it’s THEIR fucking characters, and it’s THEIR decision of who does what and who acts like what. There’s a VERY thick line between canon and fanon, and you can’t seem to distinguish that AT ALL. You merge your shitty headcanons with the canon universe, and when something doesn’t go your way, you FREAK THE FUCK OUT and go crying about it in your server or on your tags.

youre blowing that ONE FUCKING POST so out of proportion ive never complained abt ososan in upset.txt outside of MAYBE episode 4 and that would be because of the NONCONSENSUAL SEX SCENE i KNOW my headcanons arent canon i KNOW that the chibita/snowtoko complaint was MINOR and i fucking LIKED THAT EPISODE A LOT!! i didnt cry i just felt that based on how the staff have characterized chibita up until that point it was a little jarring to see him react like he did THAT IS ALL! what the fuck!! how would you even know what i talk about in my servers!! youre obviously misinformed my guy!!!

Lemme tell you something, Sombre: Karabita isn’t canon. OH SHIT! I SAID IT BOYS! THAT’S A FUCKING CURSE ISN’T IT!! No, sorry, sit the fuck down and suck those tears up, because it’s true. It’s not canon. It isn’t. You grasp at straws to say it is, but it isn’t. Chibita wore somehing blue? Oh shit, it’s Karamatsu! He’s clearly in love with him! No, sorry honey, that’s not how it works. Of course Chibita would feel pity on him and let him stay with him (ep 24), because who wouldn’t? That doesn’t mean they’re dating. Karamatsu may be the most bisexual person ever, but he sure as hell isn’t dating Chibita (at least, not canonly). Speaking of Chibita, you need to stop acting like any other Matsu x Chibita ship is literal hell. They’re not. There are some decent ones out there, and although they’re rarepairs by now, they’re a lot better quality than the Karabita bullshit you spew out.

me saying karabita is canon is a joke, and my disdain for non karabita matsubita ships is based half in coping reasons and half in chibita has literally no chemistry with the other matsus and seems to not like any of the other bros at all whereas hes actually shown some level of tolerance or interest in karamatsu

While we’re on the subject of non-canon ships, Atsutodo isn’t canon either. Fuck’s sake, they were on screen together for 10 damn seconds. Yes, I’m aware there’s card art of Atsushi and Todomatsu having a meal together, but they’re very clearly not dating if Todomatsu is still going out with girls and holding their hands etc. Oh, speaking of Todomatsu: Your trans hc of him? Generic as fuck. He’s not trans. Call me a transphobe, I don’t give a shit, but he’s not trans. Look at the -kun animes. He’s a guy. Where in his life would he have magically been a girl and then go right back to a guy? The time span between a 12 year old and a 21 year old isn’t long enough to allow you time to transition. In that day and age, it wasn’t even acceptable to be transgender. So none of the Matsus are trans, get that out of your head. Get those “autism hcs” out of your head too, because I KNOW you hc Kara and Jyushi as autistic (and I’m aware you used to headcanon Ichimatsu as autistic too, but we’ll get to that later).

i know atsutodo isnt canon i never said it was all the “x ship is canon” jokes are about karabita and theyre jokes dude, i just think atsutodo would be cute. why the fuck do you even care about my trans hcs?? theyre HEADCANONS they dont HURT ANYONE and like dude there are trans children out there….. stop being a fuckface about simple headcanons what the fuck.

Lemme tell ya something. Karamatsu sure as hell isn’t autistic. Literally the only reason you headcanon him as such is because you yourself claim to be autistic and because “uwu he’s m fav,,,, i relate to him,,,”. Also, I realize “jyushi is autistic xD” headcanons are common, but JESUS FUCK it’s time for them to die. Jyushimatsu is just bizarre in and out, it’s his personality and his way of life. If you’re gonna hc him as autistic for his personality, you’re obviously ignoring his physical abilities. What about that time he cloned himself? Grew different sizes? What about how he seemingly has no bones (tentacle arms)? But oh, let’s ignore that, because he’s always got a smile on his face and he has a childish personality so DURR HE’S OBVIOUSLY AUTISTIC. Also, you used to headcanon Ichimatsu as autistic, but as soon as you started hating him you threw that headcanon out the window. This is PROOF you only headcanon your favorite characters as autistic, and that’s some of the STUPIDEST shit ever.

literally just let people headcanon what they want if it doesnt hurt anyone, im sure in canon theyre not autistic but this is HEADCANON. and is this also to imply that just because a character can do bizarre thing with theyre body they cant also be autistic?? what the fuck does that have to do with anything??? and i didnt throw my autistic ichi hc out the window because “i hate him” i dont even hate him im indifferent to him i hate his fanon incarnation because its stupidly out of character and one note, i also didnt even drop the autism hc for him i feel like he definitely 100% could be autistic but i just dont think about it as much because i think about other characters more than i think about him

Oh yeah, I’d love to hear why you hate Ichimatsu so much? Shut up, I know it’s because “hhhh he abuses kara” but that’s fucking wrong. Listen, Ichimatsu isn’t exactly my favorite either but at least I don’t make him out to be a fucking asshole to Karamatsu. All of the brothers have treated Karamatsu like shit at one point or another. They’ve thrown things at him, ditched him, called him names, ignored him, it’s a fucking trope in the anime that Karamatsu was the one to get hurt. Sure, season 2 has kinda turned that around, but the whole “Ichimatsu is bitter to Karamatsu” thing is the dynamic between them. They DO have moments where they’re not onto each other, though. See how Ichimatsu followed Karamatsu into the woods? Remember the episode where they switched clothes? They didn’t kill each other neither of those times, did they? And yes, I’m aware Ichimatsu has hurt Karamatsu at times (the bazooka, I think smacking?) but he doesn’t LITERALLY ABUSE HIM. You don’t see him kicking him around, PUNCHING HIM, HITTING HIM, EVERY SECOND OF HIS LIFE. Yes, he calls him names. Yes, he’s threatened to hurt him (“I’ll kill you, Shittymatsu.”) but he’s been stopped or HAS stopped every time. If he really was so intent on hurting Karamatsu, don’t you think he wouldn’t ignore his brothers and hurt Karamatsu anyway? But no, he didn’t, and he stopped each time he grabbed Kara. That’s because the entire “Ichimatsu despises Karamatsu” thing is a GAG in the show. It’s meant to be funny. It’s not meant for your negative ass to label it as abuse and then boohoo about it every time Ichimatsu is mentioned. That’s not a valid reason to hate a character, hell, even Karamatsu’s seiyuu said in a Doramatsu CD that Karamatsu was just comic relief. And if you’re gonna look for a reason why Ichimatsu dislikes Karamatsu, consider the hinted and well-supported reason: Ichimatsu “hates” Karamatsu because of how confident he is and how he can always be himself. Ichi is insecure. Ichi is antisocial. Kara, on the other hand, can express himself and show how “cool” he is. Consider that Ichimatsu wants to be more like him, hence why he said he’s the “number one Karamatsu boy” in that one episode.

okay this is just ridiculous i DONT HATE ICHIMATSU and i KNOW its a GAG, i KNOW they get along sometimes i KNOW all the brothers have shat on kara I KNOW THIS abuse takes many forms though and in a more serious anime the way the bros treat kara would probably be depicted as abusive, but it isnt a serious anime so its a gag and i understand that thats FINE, did you even watch the ichimatsu incident? ichimatsu got plenty fucking pissed off at karamatsu and stuff and the “number one karamatsu boy” nonsense was him being concerned about how karamatsu might think of him as such not him calling himself a karamatsu boy, and yes i know the whole ichi wants to be cool and confident like kara thing i understand that but even so that wouldnt logically excuse his bitterness toward kara but again, its a gag anime so its whatever, youre also ignoring the facet of his disdain towards kara being in part because kara is also vain and ichi finds this annoying and thinks kara is fake as hell because of it there was something in i think a magazine where the bros are all asked what they think of eachother i think and i THINK ichi said something along the lines of him not liking kara because he fakes being nice for the sake of his own ego or something (which is likely ichi just having a negative image of kara rather than that actually being the case because i dont think karas that smart but who knows i dont!!) so like y’know

In conclusion, I would like to say you need to shut the fuck up and chill with your fandoms and headcanons, realize headcanons aren’t canon, and also get your head out of your ass. You’ve done so many wrong things and need to stop blaming them on others. You’ve lied, insulted, and put the blame on so many of your old friends, you’ve avoided people who you deem “toxic” (simply because they have different opinions than you), you think people can’t form their own opinions, and you don’t back up your friends when they’re getting shittalked. You act like an assoholic brat and cannot, for the life of you, open up your eyes and see this. You’re lucky the dicktwats on your server are there for you, because if they weren’t, you’d be all alone, and honestly? That seems pretty good at this point. Fits you perfectly.

i know headcanons arent canon, i know ive lied (though ive really only insulted people who were dicks to my friends and maybe blu which probably not a good thing but i mean hes also insulted me so?? even i guess??) and i regret that, im more honest now and try my best to show kindness to people who have done me and my friends no wrong, ive only ever put blame on blu i literally dont blame anyone else for anything, i dont avoid people i deem “toxic” i avoid people i dont get along with because if i dont get along with them then theres no reason to talk to them im gonna let them live their lives, of course i think people can form their own opinions what on earth are you talking about???? when did i not back up a friend when they got shit talked?? i dont remember that but id like to deeply apologize if i ever did, unless youre talking about when someone in my server insults blu over ykno… him not leaving me alone and harassing me when ive done nothing but mind my own business since the incident, then while it was kind of uncomfortable for me because i felt it was the wrong thing to do i couldnt exactly muster the words to protest it. im very sorry you feel that way im always trying to improve and i like to think that im making some level of progress in being more sensitive and kind to those around me. but also dont insult my friends they didnt do shit weve been minding our own goddamn business this entire time blu is the one who started it back up again.

Now, go back to crying in your server and soaking in self-deprication, fuckass.

yknow i get the feeling i know who this is but i dont want to jump to any conclusions so, uh, okay! see ya my dude :0c

[punkscrunchies]

-letsbefriends-

reblogged your post and added:

???? Trouble following that first bit..idk why...

for some reason i cant reblog this and explain bc tumblr’s code is fucking up again so i have to do it in replies

i understand why this may have caused confusion. and this honest to god is not an attack on trans/ace people/pan people. this is more of a “me venting post.” my younger brother (he’s trans, still getting used to that :/) is friends with a girl who has like...a twenty syllable word for her sexuality and she’s only 12/13.

ALSO:

fun fact - being trans IS actually caused by a physical trait! i believe it’s a mix-up of chemicals or signals in the brain. i understand how not knowing this could have caused a mix-up.

my referral to pan people was...rude. my point that came out was NOT the one i had in my head. my apologies. (i think it was 2am when i posted it so that may explain a few things) WHAT I MEANT was that people like to say being “pan” and being “bi” are ‘so different!’ but the fact is that, when it comes down to it, you’re attracted to dick and vagina with both of them. i dont at all understand why there has to be two terms for this, but okay. i’m not going to rant at you about this if you tell me that you’re pan - i wrote this as an explanation.

also the ‘dick and vagina’ thing brings me to the general point of the post itself. WHAT I MEANT in it was that, yes, i am fucking sick of the LGBT+ acronym going from LGBTQIA+ (which was probably the most letters i can accept) to LGBTKAJWJBOCKJABLIGB+. my problem is that people want to describe their sexualities in terms of being gender-inclusive but that’s not how sexuality works. sexuality is what you are automatically attracted to. It’s a deep psychological thing and a biologically female lesbian is not going to look at a biologically male who identifies as female (and hasnt started/taken hormones) across the room and want to sleep with her. that’s not because she’s transphobic - it’s because sexuality is not gender fucking inclusive. i know lesbians have been in relationships with mtf people before, but the attraction, that moment where you look at someone and think “i’d hit that” usually happens after that person has been taking hormones for a while.

 why? she identified as female, right?

because a lesbian is a woman who is attracted to female physical/sexual features. that is how sexuality works.

my problem, therefore, is that tumblr has created this LGBT+ society where everyone has to have a super-specific label to describe them - the girl i was talking about before was attracted to “everybody but biologically female people.” so shes straight, fuckin hetero. the point of a label on sexuality is for two reasons:

1. for scientific research/classification

2. as a general description in order for you to find people who share similar experiences with you (the point of the LGBT+ community)

labels are meant as general descriptors for what is biologically not straight/cis. not what is the most gender-inclusive label you can stick on. L - attracted to female traits. G - attracted to male traits (assuming that G=only homosexual males). B/P - attracted to female and male traits. T - having a difference in make-up of the brain that causes you to feel dysphoria and dysmorphia in your own body. + - ace; agender/etc. You dont need a label to be SPECIFIC, you need it to be general so you dont have to explain your sexuality. God, i have to explain what me being bisexual (and very rarely agender since im not open about it) enough - why would you want to be anything more ridiculous??

here’s a quote from a blog i found:

“Straight girls on tumblr have an annoying problem with inventing sexual orientations so they can feel more oppressed than they actually are. Because what it comes down to is most of them are some sort of boring, every day sexuality (usually hetero) they [sic] have to tack on other words to define themselves and confuse people into thinking they are oppressed... What it boils down to is basically 99% of these...people with weird sexual orientations that they completely made up, are actually...straight girls who are pissed off that they aren't special snowflake enough to qualify for minority status. What they do instead is created sexual identities that no one has ever fucking heard of, that they will never use in real life, and then sit on the internet pretending that life is SO HARD for someone with a sexual orientation that is actually just a personal preference they have when trying to find a mate. All of this is a slap in the face to actual people who are actually in the LGBTQ community because what it does it make the universe less likely to take real issues seriously. ”

Another interesting quote from the same post:

“This sexuality (which by the way was completely 100% invented for a roleplaying game back in the early 2000's)” - in reference to demisexuality.

that’s basically my problem summed up, except incorporating ridiculous genders in too. 

i really don’t think i can go past that in terms of an explanation so. there we go. i guess i could say that, to me, some of these gender identities (some, not all) and sexuality labels (again, some, not all) are on the same level as “identifying” as a race/ethnicity.

anyway i hope this helped. i really dont mean to be offensive, it was a vent post. my problem is not that im being transphobic or whatever phobic we’ve invented this week (let’s not bring up aphobia). it’s that young girls want attention and they’ve come here to get it. it’s a slap in the face after leelah alcorn especially.

also, possibly different issue somewhat related here, but my school’s LGBT+ club has turned into an anime club. so not to stereotype but...there’s a type of people who like. make up this shit.

also, another possibly different issue somewhat related here - my school has had to get a doctor’s certificate for gender dysmorphia and gender dysphoria because the counsellors cant deal with the amount of people identifying as some form of gender identity (especially trans - they like playing with cars and suddenly theyre a different gender!!!!) for attention (theyre all under the age of 15 btw).

okay. i still dont know why i couldnt reblog this from you or message you but. here we are. bye. hope you have a nice day. didnt and dont mean to offend

[getstickbugdlol]

valentines day themed ask that i stole from katie 

1: Do you have a crush at the moment? nah 

2: Have you ever been deeply in love? naaaaahhhh

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in? six months lmao 4: Have you ever changed for someone? i faked interests but i wouldn’t say i changed who i am  5: How is your relationship with your ex? i literally don’t talk to any of my exes mostly bc they’re all immature 6: Have you ever been cheated on? not that i know of but i have my suspicions about one guy 7: Have you ever cheated? no 8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating? absolutely not 9: What’s the most important part of a relationship? trust and honesty 10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? i think a serious relationship but ive never had anything really serious  11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”? i don’t even know what the fuck a break is  12: How many people have you ever hooked up with? uh.....three i think  13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship? i mostly regret things i DIDN’T do bc i was NOT communicative enough bc i was trying to be Cool Girl  14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex? i would say like the EARLIEST age that somebody is emotionally ready for that is probably sixteen to seventeen but that’s for a SUPER MATURE kid. i started having sex when i was 19 and im glad i waited 15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”? nooooooo 16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”? i want to believe in it 17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet? yeah but there are definitely things i think that are important to do physically together 18: What do you consider a deal breaker? lying to me  19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship? when u don’t look forward to seeing ur SO 20: Are you currently in a relationship? nah im single af 21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? hmm yeah but its very rare 22: Do you think people should date their friends? only if ur sure ur both in it for the long haul 23: How many relationships have you had? three 24: Do you think love can last forever? i have no thoughts about this  25: Do you believe love can conquer all things? eh not rly 26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of? probably not cause my parents do not have the best judgment 27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be? value urself 28: Do you think long distance relationships can work? NOT FOR ME BITCH!!! been there done that!!! 29: What do you notice first about another person? their face or their butt  30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual? so bisexual 31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness? we’d be in it together  32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? nah 33: Do you want to get married one day? i want to have a wedding 34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed? no  35: Could you be in a relationship without sex? um it would be hard lol 36: Are you still a virgin? that ship has sailed 37: What’s more important: Looks or personality? personality 38: Do you enjoy love films? most of them yeah  39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses? yes  40: Have you ever had a valentine? one time but we literally did not mention valentines day at all  41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”? i dont even know. gettin all glammed up and going out to the ballet or some shit with somebody i love 42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”? a few times 43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends? i aint got no partner but my cat is really important 44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”? in little ways yeah  45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends? lol no 46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”? no 47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite? nobody famous people are evil 48: What’s your favorite love song? the blackest crow!!! 49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? yee 50: If you’re single, why do you think you are? because im terrible and also i keep moving around, untethered 51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy? a poor nice guy  52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships? i like to think so but probably not 53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single? i usually don’t care that much  54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)?  who even cares  55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”? not clingy but jealous af  56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship? i mean ive dumped all of my boyfriends  57: Do you think it’s silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart? i think it is a struggle that goes way beyong a broken heart  58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship?  dominant...lol 59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary? i don’t think i’ve ever been in a relationship when they’ve had a bday and i’ve never gotten far enough in  relationship to celebrate an anniversary  60: What’s your opinion on open relationships? not for me 61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family? my partner is more important than everyone but my mom  62: How do you define “cheating”? anything you wouldn’t be comfortable with your partner knowing about involving another person 63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate? i think it depends on the relationship and what you’ve agreed upon  64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated? yeah but i love candy so  65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”? noooooot at all

[lookwhatilost]

i saw this valentines day ask meme earlier and i wanted to reblog it but i also dnt want people prying on gp and i know nobody will send me anything here bc i have like no followers, so im going to answer it under the cut and if you wanna b #nosy, then you’re at your liberty to do so

also im drunk answering these so theres that

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?

lmfao

2: Have you ever been deeply in love?

yes, sadly 😪

3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?

unofficially we were on and off over the course of almost 4 years but officially the longest we were together was only a handful of months... but i generally tell people the unofficial version bc i feel like they’d downplay the significance of it otherwise

4: Have you ever changed for someone?

yeah but in the sense that i let good things inside me wither and die when i shouldnt have

5: How is your relationship with your ex?

he’s living with someone else but makes a point of letting me know that he’s still th*rsting over me... it’s rly embarrassing

6: Have you ever been cheated on?

idk for certain but most likely

7: Have you ever cheated?

no

8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?

if i was aware, no, but i feel like i’d be totally possible for me to start going out w someone like that without being aware of that reputation beforehand

9: What's the most important part of a relationship?

your heads need to b in the same place i think... what with priorities, values, etc. i know some people can happily ignore conflicts like that & jst know to never bring them up but i can’t ever picture myself doing that.

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

i’ve never had a “fling” in my life and i dnt intend to

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?

if you need space from someone, then it is what it is, but i dnt think i would ever use the term “break” bc it’s too grey. i’ve seen friends. i know what’s up.

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?

harry’s the only person ive been with in any capacity

13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?

a lot but i think i would say, like, letting it go on for as long as it did bc i thought i didn’t have anything else going for me. granted, i didn’t, but sometimes it’s better to be invested in an ex that you aren’t speaking to, than be invested in a relationship that’s dragging you down

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?

never tbh sex is dumb as shit

15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?

fuck no

16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?

i believe you can instantly recognize that you connect to another person but that’s not, like, love lmfao

17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?

yeah but i’ve no interest in that

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?

in a relationship i dnt think i would interpret anything as an objective deal breaker aside from the Big Shit like cheating etc. but if i was considering dating someone i think the biggest deal breaker would be political differences.

19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?

i’ll let you know when i figure it out

20: Are you currently in a relationship?

no

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?

under the right circumstances, sure

22: Do you think people should date their friends?

i would encourage them to. i personally wouldn’t want to get into a romantic relationship that didn’t already have the foundation of a strong platonic one

23: How many relationships have you had?

one

24: Do you think love can last forever?

no but i dnt think there’s anything wrong with that either

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?

absolutely not

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?

my parents are so out of touch w who i am that their approval or objection carries no weight beyond that so... no

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?

all advice is useless. conclusions have no meaning unless you draw them yourself. if i could go back in time, i would kill hitler.

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?

yes but personally ive no interest in one

29: What do you notice first about another person?

this is gnna sound dumb but whether they have a threatening vibe to them or not. for context: i work in service

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?

i’m bisexual but i dnt see my attraction to men as anything more than begrudging & a nuisance

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?

not in principle, but i have a lot of mental illnesses myself, and if i was in a position where my mental disorders and my partner’s were jst endlessly feeding off of one another... yeah that would definitely upset me

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?

harry was definitely emotionally abusive to me at times but he was jst stupid tbh and retrospectively i dnt consider it to be abusive. jst, like, it was a very bad dynamic and it coaxed shitty things out of both of us

33: Do you want to get married one day?

not rly

34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?

i wouldnt

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

easily

36: Are you still a virgin?

i wish

37: What's more important: Looks or personality?

personality obvi but physical attraction still needs to be there lmfao

38: Do you enjoy love films?

no they’re bad

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?

ive gotten roses twice

40: Have you ever had a valentine?

what even is that

41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?

i dnt have a specific vision but it would involve day drinking lmfao

42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?

yeah. 3/10 tbh.

43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?

it’s a balancing act! ive been guilty of putting my friendships on the back burner in favor of romantic relationships and i dnt want to do that again!

44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?

not anymore

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?

this is a loaded question bc all my friends follow this... if i say yes, it’s awkward. if i say no they’ll be like “well why the fuck not?”

46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?

have people i liked romantically not returned my feelings? yes. have i gotten all indignant and entitled abt it? i’d like to think not.

47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?

literally i can’t even think of any

48: What's your favorite love song?

momentarily? knock you down by keri hilson. it’s cute & a throwback

49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?

doubt it

50: If you're single, why do you think you are?

lack of proximity to available people that i’m compatible with, the fact that i have standards

51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?

poor & nice... no shit sherlock

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?

all dating advice is a shout into the void. i dnt bother

53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?

i think exposure to that kind of stuff hits on a very real insecurity that stems from a rly long pattern of being mistreated in my romantic endeavors, but it’s not jealousy lmfao it’s something much more insidious than that... like i feel like im being taunted for having extremely severe emotional trauma related to that and it’s rly not a can of worms i want to open

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)?

it’s not like important-important, but suffice to say, i would be suspicious of someone who was vehemently against it

55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?

i’m trying to learn there’s nothing shameful abt being attached to the people you care abt, so yes & no

56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?

yeah but i dnt feel particularly bad abt it either

57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?

when you’re suicidal you dnt care much for what is or isnt silly, let’s be real

58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?

ideally my relationships dnt have a dynamic like that

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?

i have a weird fixation on dates and remember significant ones from, like, 10 years ago. february 9th 2009 was a big one, actually. so no i generally dnt forget dates unless i didnt commit them to memory in the first place

60: What's your opinion on open relationships?

stupid

61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?

my family isnt important to me

62: How do you define "cheating"?

doing anything #physical with someone other than yr partner, or like, carrying out any sort of emotional relationship w someone you aren’t dating (like you’re telling someone else that you love them & wanna get w them or whatever)... some of it is rly cut n dry but other times its very, well, grey

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?

i mean it’s not but like... holy shit dude you’re not 15 anymore.

64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?

who dznt?

65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?

probably. who knows. i cant believe answering this ate up almost a whole hour

[seagreenflowers]

for your consideration this pride month:

A non-binary, bisexuals probably homophobic opinions on gender and sexuality

for starters, i’d like to say this is just my personal opinion and i don’t expect anyone to actually read this other than maybe one friend i have on tumblr and people i specifically send it to, but in the event that this blows up because ya know, it’s the internet: I’m not trying to invalidate anyone’s gender expression, sexuality, person opinions, labels, or thoughts on the community. this is just how i personally view everything concerning LGBT from my lived experiences.

to begin, i think that there are two main opinions from people in and outside the community over the number of labels we use and they generally fall into these categories either: “we have too many, these fucking snowflakes” and “i don’t really care, you do you” there are very, very few actually “”snowflakes”” that use the terminology we’ve all seen and had opinions about. therefore, why is it still in use? why do they have their own pride days in the month? well, from what i can see, my best guess is the definitions of everything are very muddled and the minute differences are expanded upon in ways that simply do not make sense to me.

for example, the sheer number of words we have for an attraction to multiple genders, while they all have their own differences, why can there not just be an umbrella term and people describe their individual sexual desires to the people they need to define it to. just to make my case here’s the words i’ve found:

bisexual

pansexual

omnisexual

polysexual

queer

all of these words have a basic meaning of attraction to more than one gender that it is inconceivable to me why we need all of them. if there’s discourse around how bisexual doesn’t just mean two, then why does poly exist? and if there’s discussion about bisexuals not always have a gender preference then why do pan and omni have distinctions? to me personally, in a perfect world, we need zero labels, but how we live today, we need the labels. if straights and gays aren’t equal and we take away the distinctions, they’ll never be equal. but stemming from that, i have qualms with words like this that feel like preferences over an actual distinction in sexuality. because the argument from the community (which i 100% agree with) is that you don’t Choose sexuality, things that feel like Choosing demean the entire system. things like bi where you see gender feel to me like “when looking for a partner, i Choose based on gender” definitionally and maybe that’s a misinterpretation of the word choice because in dating and sex everyone has to experience choice, that’s consent, but really you fall in and out of want instead of saying “i’m looking for a 5’4 blonde girl that has freckles” because as much as you can have a wish list it will never be fulfilled in the way you intend because people don’t bend to specifications. and maybe that thought process of not looking for a gender or a set of attributes makes me pan, but that’s not how i identify, so this is where we get to the point. if people don’t identify with the words that most describe how they actually feel because there’s another word that explains them, why do the words exist in the first place!

this is why it took me 4 years to actually come to the conclusion that i was bi. 1. because of the sheer number of words to describe how i was feeling but 2. if bisexuals can have any split between male and female attraction (doesn’t have to just be male and female but for examples sake) if i am not split 50/50 that would fall into the realm of poly and omni. and 3. girls are cute but are girls like date cute or are girls just like delicate cute (but that’s beside the point)

now i think i continue to beat a dead horse if i go into discussions about asexuality and all of its subgroups 1. because i’ve proven my point with multiple gendered love and 2. that’s not my community i would get something wrong and that’s not my intention. but GENDER!! FUN!!

so anyway that i go into this is going to sound offensive and it will get kind of rude but it’s out of pure inability to comprehend most of this. if someone wants to educate me, go right ahead.

NO ONE UNDERSTANDS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GENDER IDENTITY AND GENDER EXPRESSION

gender identity is the gender you feel. the sex. male, female, non-binary.

gender Expression is how you interpret that label. things like demi girl and gender fluid feel in this category to me because you Cannot in any case change gender day to day. period.

you are allowed to dress more masculine and feel more comfortable masculine one day and feel more comfortable feminine another. that’s not your gender changing!!!!! that’s just PREFERENCES!!!!!!! that’s Choice!!!!!!

what i’ve always understood in my heart the way to tell if you’re feeling a shift in expression or in identity is these 3 categories: perception, privates, personality. the three Ps (i did just come up with this)

are you worried or uncomfortable with someone using a certain name or set of language that hints to gender (such as queen v king) [the pronoun discussion is for later i don’t find it appropriate to include it here] this is perception

do you dislike something being a part of your body, not because you find it ugly, uncomfortable, or unnecessary but because you Want the Parts of Another Sex. for example there’s a difference in “oh i wish i didn’t have a uterus because i hate periods” and “i wish i didn’t have a uterus because the thought of that being a part of my body makes me feel sick because i want *male anatomy*” that is privates

and finally, personality. just because you’re a tomboy doesnt make you trans. just because you like dresses or skirts as a boy, doesn’t make you trans. everyone’s personality and individualism is what makes this difficult. you’re allowed to have interests that are “of the opposite gender” that don’t make you trans.

and something that i feel is an important distinction and will lead us into the pronouns portion, and this sounds rude but it’s not, it’s the truth. there are a lot more people that claim ftm than mtf. there just simply are, and the problem with that arises with a lot of women are upset about the condition of being a woman in today’s society, with all the pressures, expectations, lack of rights, etc etc that they would rather be perceived as a man. they would rather be a man to avoid the constant taunting of women and as much as that’s relatable, being fed up with the human condition of womanhood DOES NOT MAKE YOU TRANS. all of the “she/they non-binaries” that arise today that have no problems with being identified as a woman in public, that have no want to change their physical bodies because they want the ones of the opposite sex, and act Like A Woman *are not really trans* because that demeans every aspect of what it Actually means to be trans and honestly it’s kind of insulting to be someone that experiences extreme gender dysphoria to just see people with the desire to be less of a woman out of, here’s this again, Choice, when really they’re mad about society. and oh boy is it completely valid to be mad about the conditions of women, and it is valid to identify as she/they or he/they. it’s just, the distinction between people that actually experience gender dysphoria and the ones that don’t like the way that boobs make the world interact with them.

ALSO WHAT THE FUCK ARE NEOPRONOUNS????? i don’t get it. i’ve never understood it and i don’t think i ever will but like, bold claim, furries and otherkins aren’t Part of the lgbt community???? and i might be mislead on what neopronouns actually are but the only time i’ve seen them actually used are in cases with otherkins and the like wanting to be referred to as pronouns that correspond with their *preferred species* which is a whole other can of snowflake worms that i don’t have time to get into today but like,,,in my humble opinion, i feel as tho he she and they kinda cover the spectrum. you’re fem identifying, she/her. boom, solved. ur masc identifying he/him. lovely, awesome. you feel in between, they/them. great. excellent. you have kinship with both femininity and androgyny she/they (or vice versa he/they) but like IM NOT CALLING SOMEONE LIKE “”BUNSELF”” CAUSE YOURE A BUNNY. THATS NOT HOW LANGUAGE WORKS???? this is only a phenomenon of the english language because most latin languages DONT EVEN HAVE A THEY/THEM FOR EVERYDAY CONVERSATIONS. and we have the AUDACITY to come up with this stuff???? i don’t- i don’t get it. like i speak spanish (i’m not a native, i’m still learning so don’t roast me if i say something incorrect) and it’s nearly impossible to find a way to refer to yourself as a they/them because the words simply don’t exist. i’m lucky enough to be okay with he/him pronouns but in languages and cultures were every single thing you interact with is labeled with a gender there’s simply no time to come up with and incorporate things like Neopronouns when we can’t even find a way to express the basics in another language... and the whole point of the LGBT community is to be inclusive to everyone no matter their sexuality, gender, race, ethnic background etc etc but this is something that quite blatantly leaves out most of the World.

anyway, these are some of my opinions. feel free to ask questions and ignore typos. once again i’m open to education, but this has been my ted talk.