#but i'd like to suggest the youtube video 'dealing with intrusive thoughts' by thomas sanders

[fridayyy-13th]

i think i get what you mean, i remember seeing posters around my junior high/high school with that same sentiment of "thoughts become words/words become actions/etc etc." it always seemed like the slippery slope fallacy to me, but i digress.

sometimes, that is how things work, for example, unlearning internalized biases (the more you think of something as normal the more normal it will seem), but not all the time.

like, for example, let's say i get unwanted violent thoughts towards my friends. brains like to mess around with what-ifs and maybes, but really, actually injuring one of my friends is something i would never do. no matter how many times i have these thoughts, i'm never going to do something like that, i'm never going to want to do something like that, even if the thoughts occur often. why would i? i hate seeing my friends upset and hurt. of course, instinct says to feel guilty about these thoughts, which is understandable, but at the end of the day i haven't actually done anything, haven't taken any steps to harm them.

really, the best way to deal with intrusive thoughts is to acknowledge them, realize that they have no bearing on you as a person, and try to move on. trying to banish the thoughts from your mind entirely is something that won't work (brains get insistent if you try to shove something away, they're weird like that), so focus on acceptance. accepting a thought isn't saying "this is a normal thought i am willing to act on," it's more like "that's a thing i'm thinking. alright." and then moving on as best you can. maybe go do something else for a bit. draw something, or watch an interesting youtube video, or whatever you like to do. eventually the thought will pass.

remember, no one can see inside your head. you're not "secretly a bad person" for having these thoughts, a lot of people get them. your thoughts won't become your beliefs unless you're making a conscious choice to change those beliefs. if the thoughts are really bothering you, maybe try talking to someone you trust or journaling about it.

listen to me. thoughts do not have moral weight. a thought will never hurt anyone. the actions you take because of a thought can hurt yourself or other people, but the thought itself is powerless and there is no such thing as thought crime.

"but i have thoughts about being violent towards people! towards children! surely that makes me dangerous!" are you being violent? for real? with your actions? if not, then you are not actually hurting anyone

"but i have thoughts that are offensive and hurtful! they're bigoted, or they're horribly rude, or they're invalidating to others! i'm a horrible person." and what are you doing with those thoughts, exactly? are you taking bigoted actions, or saying those rude things, or taking steps to actually invalidate people? no? well then. no one is getting hurt. and in the meantime, if it really bothers you, doing things like helping unlearn your biases (both against minorities and just, like, against furries and theatre kids and shit) might help some of those thoughts go away, but sometimes you just get shitty thoughts.

"but i have horrific thoughts about sex!" are you hurting people. are you forcing people to do things they don't consent to. or are you just playing the upsetting possibility in your mind over and over again, and acting like that's even remotely the same thing?

thought. crime. is. not. real. OCD. is. hell. (and anything else that may cause intrusive thoughts.) but it does not define you. your thoughts will always, always come secondary to your actions. you're gonna be fine.