#but i guess it's important to his character

[aihoshiino]

chapter 161 thoughts

Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 18

Aqua Hoshigan Status: For the future

Never has an OnK chapter gone from It's Hoshinover to We Are Oshi no Back quite as hard and fast as this one. I have issues with this chapter in terms of what it implies about the story's overall structure and the fact that it sort of ruins 153-4 by association but this chapter's back half is so fucking good and the chapter itself works so well in isolation that much like 153-4, I kind of uhhh don't care about the structural issues because the story's heart is, for the most part, not just intact but beating harder and more passionately than it has in a long time.

To get what I don't like out of the way, the story seems to have settled on Super Evil Serial Killer Mastermind Kamiki as his final form characterization with some helpful Tsukuyomi exposition to just straightforwardly Tell Us things the manga probably should have spent some of the last 70something chapters Showing Us about Hikaru. The basic idea of Hikaru being some sort of serial killer so dedicated to upholding Ai's legacy that he kills women with the potential to surpass her was more or less always where I expected his character to land and this settling of his character does at least preserve what I think is the most important thing: that he genuinely loved Ai and his bent towards villainy only came after her death.

What I don't love as much is that this chapter seems to continue leaning into Uber God Manipulator Mastermind Kamiki like last chapter. I already talked at length about my issues with this framing in my previous chapter review so all I'll reiterate here is that the story's attempt to frame Hikaru as being equally or even more culpable for the actions of Nino and Ryosuke fall entirely flat to me, especially when the manga itself does such a pisspoor job of actually explaining how or why Kamiki was able to control and/or predict their actions to the extent that he supposedly did. And ESPECIALLY especially given that Nino and Ryosuke seem to have already been dangerously obsessed with Ai by the time they approached him.

In general, Hikaru's character is honestly just so inconsistent at this point that making any sense of his actions feels fruitless. If I really dig into what's going on, I can infer that maybe he fell into the same trap as Aqua by overcompensating for his trauma-induced helplessness by becoming overly controlling and guess that his fucked up trauma response to Ai's death combined with those terrible words Kindaichi gave him at Airi's funeral lead him down he road he's traveling now. I can even extrapolate that Aqua showing him the DVD message in 153-4 pushed Hikaru to this extreme and now that he has nothing to lose, he's lashing out at his children too - though, it should be noted, that the manga still hasn't actually established what Hikaru's culpability is in Nino's attempt on Ruby's life, outside of Aqua saying "well you didn't use your psychic powers to perfectly predict nino's actions so it's on you".

But like - this is all stuff I'm having to infer and extrapolate and guess, reverse engineering logic from our end point in an attempt to create a stable foundation for this characterization. The manga has done such a poor job of properly establishing Hikaru both as an antagonistic force and as a consistent character that I feel like I'm trying to assemble a coherent image from two different puzzle sets with all the fucking corner pieces missing and that's with Crow Girl looking into the camera and Explaining Him to me.

And listen, I am a bitch who LOVES to infer things. One of my absolute favourite pieces of fiction of all time ever is Umineko no Naku Koro Ni, a mystery story that literally does not contain any straightforwardly explicit, textual confirmation of the culprit's identity or motives because it believes so strongly that you, the reader, are smart enough and empathetic enough to put in the time and effort necessary to understand it regardless and it deeply, deeply values being able to give you that experience. But OnK feels less like it's intentionally encouraging me to think hard and enjoy the process of putting my head and my heart to work - it feels like it's leaving its homework unfinished and letting the reader do the actual hard work of sewing up the internal logic.

I probably won't talk much more about Kamiki this chapter cos I'd just be saying all this shit over and over but I really just am struggling to understand from a perspective of authorial intent what the vibe is even supposed to be. Like I mentioned in a previous ask, if this is where Kamiki's arc is reaching its conclusion then it means that the Movie Arc was essentially a whole-ass waste of time in and out of universe. Blech. Hate that.

Also, before I move on, I don't want to leave this just implied - making Kamiki explicitly a CSA victim and then ending his arc on Aqua (and implicitly the narrative) dismissing him as being too broken/corrupted to be saved is a really major misstep that I think represents a huge black mark on OnK's handling of CSA as a topic. The idea of an eternal defilement or an unfixable core wrongness in the self is already something real life CSA victims struggle with in the process of unpacking their trauma and having our likable and supposedly morally superior protagonist espouse this unchallenged in a work as prominent and relevant as Oshi no Ko is irresponsible bordering on dangerous. It's incredibly disappointing that after all the care Aka and Mengo seemingly took in handling this topic that it was whiffed so badly at the last second.

ANYWAY!!! Now all the beef's been dealt with, we can cleanse our palettes and move onto everything else I liked which was… basically everything else in this chapter!

Admittedly, Aqua's overall arc is still suffering from us being kicked out of his head from like 123 onwards for no real apparent reason and while 150 was a welcome refresher on where he's at in this part of the story, it still feels a bit like the story is prioritizing preserving the surprise factor of its twists over making these surprises feel earned. Compare it to volume 1 - you are basically told exactly what is going to happen to Ai, especially in the manga when Saitou and Gotanda outright say as much - but her death is still incredibly impactful and upsetting. I think this chapter is very effective, but could've been a lot moreso if we'd spent more time in Aqua's head leading up to it.

THAT SAID… If the intention of keeping us out of his head was to recontextualize Aqua's behaviour across the past ten or so chapters in this new light, I don't hate it as much as I might have. I initially took issue with what felt like the story off-screening and not addressing the resolution to Aqua's suicidal ideation so whipping back around to prove that it was still very much present puts some particular Aqua moments over this past volume into a very different light. As some people pointed out, Aqua missing Kana's pitch - literally dropping the ball in responding to her feelings - and his wide-eyed look of alarm in 151 seemed very ominous omens for the success of her confession and that beat of him covering his face when Kana approves of his dream… very incheresting knowing Aqua was still struggling with 'love or revenge' at this point.

Most interesting of all to reconsider is Aqua breaking down in tears in Miyako's arms in 155 when she addresses him as her son for the first time. At the time it read like catharsis but now I can't help but wonder if this was Aqua grieving for something he desperately wants but thinks is out of his reach.

i do have to say though. i get the general vibe of this plan and think it works fine as the apex of aqua's self-sacrificial protectiveness for the people he loves but how is being the daughter of a serial killer somehow any less scandalous for her career than being the sister of someone who killed one dude. does aqua think they just won't notice that kamiki happens to be their biodad or something. wasn't that the whole point of the movie. goofy ass plan.

What really saves this whole scenario is the emotions at play, though. This really does feel like Aqua at his most Aqua in a really long while and this chapter has so much love and respect for his life as Aqua and the bonds he has formed as a result. The dreams Aqua lays out are so agonizingly simple, too - he wants to pursue the career he finds rewarding. He wants to date the girl he likes. He wants to accept Miyako as his mom and Himekawa as his brother and to make things right with Akane after hurting and using her. He wants to see Ruby achieve her dream and be there to support her when she does.

But Aqua's always considered his dreams impossible, hasn't he?

I fully admit; I got spoiled with the full page spread of Aqua stabbing himself way in advance of the chapter and initially hated it as a twist. But with the full chapter as context and the sheer weight of Aqua's longing to just fucking live and find joy, it's not just effective but absolutely gutwrenching. It is the synthesis of Aqua's series-long battle to choose love or revenge and it resonates perfectly because it has never been one or the other for him - Aqua's revenge has always been rooted in the fact that he loves others so wholly and completely and hates himself so utterly that he thinks sacrificing himself to preserve their futures is the only path for him to take. It's the culmination and final release of the suicidal ideation Aqua has been dealing with since he was four years old and like Ai's tragedy before him, there's a horrible sense that maybe there really was no other way this could've gone.

Aqua being the character who actually takes the knife also firmly cements him as Ai's narrative echo in the text which has me barkin and howlin because it's what I've been saying all this time. Not just that, but so many of Aqua's expressions in this chapter pointedly and deliberately echo Ai's after she was stabbed. Not just that, but Aqua's achingly simple dreams echo Ai's own heartrendingly simple regrets - all the two of them ever wanted was to be happy with the people they love.

This also reframes the story's prior establishment of Ruby as paralleling Ai and seems to place the twins in the position of echoing not Ai in her entirety but Ruby as 'Ai of B-Komachi' and Aqua as 'Ai Hoshino'. This was actually something I outlined in one of my very first meta posts on the series, but I think making it more specific to 'Ruby as Ai the idol' and 'Aqua as Ai the human', this actually gives Ruby's arc in relation to Ai a bit of breathing room. Don't get me wrong, everything I've said about her post-BH writing being underbaked and inconsistent is still the case, especially when it comes to how confused the story is on whether Ruby is her own idol or New And Improved Ai 2.0 but giving it less ground to cover helps in terms of her writing no longer being spread quite as thin.

Speaking of Ruby, that beat of her seeming to react or sense something is up the moment Aqua takes the stab. 'Something happened to my loved one far away and I just Feel It' is a trope I'm always a sucker for and I really dig it here.

"The public don't care about the truth, so let's tell them a lie" is such a crazy hard sentiment to go out on too. Holy fuck.

There go our boys…!!! Quite a few people predicted they might go over the edge when Aqua showed up in his Mephisto fit (Mefitsto) and I'm interested to see if we get any parallels to the ED's imagery in the next few chapters. Overall, though, I'm really excited for where things are going - I don't think Aqua will die, but I do have some theories about what might happen. I can't think of a more traditional misogi purification experience than the middle of the ocean in late December, after all…

No break next week! Woohoo! While the delay of episode 12 means we won't be getting them on the same day, that is the same week S2 of the anime will be concluding and Aka does like lining up his bombshells with the anime. So who knows what we'll see.

seriously tho aqua. everyone already knows kamiki is you and ruby's biodad. HOW IS THIS ANY BETTER THAN HER BEING THE DAUGHTER OF A SERIAL KILLER AS IT ALREADY STANDS

[v-arbellanaris]

u know what actually im gonna make one last srs post abt this whole thing and then im doneeeee i swear lmfao, so all of the anons in my inbox can finally shut up and fuck off and i'll put it under a cut so i dont ~ruin your da4 hype~ the way youve fucking ruined mine i guess.

watsonian justification for this: "decisions you made 10+ years ago in another part of the country simply will not affect the current story". hey isnt the entire story behind veilguard that a guy has been working for the last 10 years to rip down the veil. like. is the whole thing not a story that started 10 years ago. do you not have access to the eluvian network now because solas stole it 10 years ago from briala. is the blight not around because of the evanuris in some way. isnt the entire magisterium something that's been in place for thousands and thousands of years. like even within the context of da, the entire story revolves around things that happened thousands of years ago that have shaped the world that our characters exist in today. we, ourselves, as real people, don't live in a world where things happening on one side of the planet do not affect anything else. and that's not even touching on the fact that we have companions from the first game showing up. at the very least decisions that affect them directly should have been factored in????

doylist justification(s) for this: #1 "we only wanted to include worldstate decisions we could develop reactivity to" so the only decisions were.... whether or not solas is romanced? for me, it's the way that when you're playing dai, the entire justification for NOT being able to romance him as anyone other than lavellan is that you can have a deep and important and complex relationship with him even if you dont romance him, the fandom is always going on & on about how important friendship!solas is and how it shouldnt be underrated but the moment his ENTIRE CHARACTER (and ours?!) gets boiled down to whether or not you had a romantic relationship with him, we're going to celebrate it??? really??? REALLY??? what in the fucking amatonormativity is this, and how is this a step BACKWARDS from dai for solas???

#2 "the world was too complicated so they wanted to simplify it for new players" that's literally the problem we're discussing. the problem we're discussing is the complexity of the world, and the solution bioware came up with for it is to simply scrap it all, and surprise surprise! not everyone is happy about it??? you are just describing the problem that the solution fails to address???

i think the most annoying part of this whole thing is the fan response to it. literallyyyy am seeing things like "no one ever complained about the worldstates not mattering in the next games before da4" which is NOT TRUE. ever since i JOINED this fandom, i've heard so many things about people complaining about leliana defaulting back to a hardened state in dai, about alistair's characterisation in dai, about cullen's repeat appearances, about your boons/decisions in dao not carrying forward in the next games. people HAVE been complaining about it, for ages, especially in dai. it is explicitly a problem in dragon age, and has been for a long, long time, and the problem has only grown the more complex the worldstate becomes. that's why they tried to address the problem here by simply scrapping it all. i've also seen things like "well if youre only interested in callback references, this dragon age game not for YOU" which not only minimises and dismisses the issues and feelings at hand here, but also reeks of self-righteous, smug superiority of I Am The Sole Correct Enjoyer. who is this game for, if not for people who love dragon age?

i'm not here for rook's story - i'm here to save the world that i've built with my own two hands over three games. i am doing that through rook as a character, yes, but i have no cause or reason to care about rook at all going into this game except for the basic fact of this is my character that i am playing - rook is a character that i expect playing the game will make me invested in and care about them. but you know what i already cared about before going into veilguard? you know what i've saved three times over already, potentially even at the cost of my own life? thedas. MY thedas. OF COURSE I WANT TO KNOW THAT IT MATTERS. in world, solas himself wants to know what changes his actions wrought. THOUSANDS OF YEARS AFTER THE FACT. why is everyone acting like fans are insane for this????

i, for one, have not complained about the game "ruining" origins or da2 or even dai. i was excited about the changes, because changes were evidently necessary. i have been fully prepared for the differences, even if i've been apprehensive or cautious about it. do you think i'm disappointed now because i hate dragon age??? where do you fucking get off saying this game is not meant for me? because i dont agree with how bioware has chosen to resolve this issue, suddenly these games are Not For Me anymore?

and you know what, i already know they're not for me. the way this series, and this fandom, treats people of colour, and characters of colour, i am made aware every single day that dragon age is not for me. these games are for the liberal white girlies and white queers living in the west. i know damn well these games have never been for me, and any insistence that it should consider me will be met with vitriol and viciousness. and guess what? i am still here.

i was sooo ready to let this go until the fandom just kept acting like ppl are idiots for being unhappy about things AT ALL in da4. its so fucking annoying to me. i'm NOT going to complain about every single little thing in da4 possible, but i'm also not going to act like bioware is going to do and is doing everything right. what is WITH this fandom and extremes of thought and behaviour. is it because you're all american??? like. i'm actually so sorry that you live in a black-and-white world with no complexities or nuances because it must be so boring and sad.

in my opinion, i would not have minded slimming down the narrative choices to a select few that they could really hone in and focus on. i feel like the dragon age keep decisions can be a bit arbitrary, and i would've loved to see like 5-6 key decisions per game, ORRRR even for your worldstate to boil down to something like whether or not you generally supported positive change or upheld the status quo per game, and then specific character decisions regarding the inquisitor to be brought in, since they're the pc that actually shows up. i do think there's likely a lot of chaff that can be cut off or simplified as a sort of "lost to the times" kind of narrative telling. but boiling down these games to three fucking choices that are ultimately just 'did u romance and like solas or nah' is fucking INSANE. why is the answer to the issue of the quantum - which has been an issue for a long time!!!!!! - to just... scrap it entirely???

edit: adding this here since i said i wouldnt make any more posts abt this topic but i rly find it laughableeeee when fans eagerly parrot bioware insisting that just because those choices dont matter in THIS game doesnt mean they'll never matter in a FUTURE game (i guess we can expect the next one in 2034?). if they already scrapped those choices for this game, and you're all still buying it (some of you??? PREORDERED it???? i thought we agreed not to do that???), why would they bother. do you think the next dragon age game wont have the same line of logic for 'we need to make it accessible for new players!!!!!' that they had for this one and for dai? how willfully stupid are you that you think I'M the stupid one here?

im happy for you guys tho! i hope the new dragon age game where theyve removed all of those complexities instead of making ANY effort to address ANY of the existing dissatisfaction around feeling like any of your game decisions mattered supports your existing brainrot so you can continue believing in a black-and-white reality. really glad theyve simplified it for you guys just like you wanted into 3 choices all about sola/vellan.

i'm going back to my own sandbox, as epler has instructed me to, so i can ~imagine~ my own thedas lmfao

[the-sinful-voice-witch]

Stephanie Brown and Damian Wayne

Damian's drawing of people who loves him personally offended me when i saw the lack of Talia (but fucking Ra was there! So ridiculously absurd), Duke, Jason and more importantly in my opinion the lack of STEPHANIE BROWN! Barbara and Rose Wilson never had the bond he had with Stephanie not even Cassandra and im specially Salty about Maya because all the fuss about the "adoptive sister" That showed up right in the messed up new 52 as if Stephanie wasn't literally the fucking first big sister figure he had, this is so insulting giving the fact that STEPHANIE WAS HIS BATGIRL:

The Batman's no-daughter and Damian first big sister, Steph is a Bat member that is placed along Batman's children but she was never adopted and we could say she is kinda in the same position as Barbara, they can only become official daughters if they become daughters in law.

I firmly believe that Damian can't be placed along all the people that personally wronged Stephanie because... Damian has been an arrogant jerk with absolutely every hero he has met, he looked down on his own father at first, the fucking Batman! So he literally didn't discriminate Stephanie, because even if he tried to insult her saying he was disappointed to see she wasn't Cassandra, when he actually met Cassandra he tried to undermine her as well so to me that comparation doesn't have the same weight as when she was constantly compared to other heroes by other certain characters.

The little time they had together in the Batgirl run was way too precious, the teasing and the banter and how they worked together was so good! Stephanie was so good to him! She got him to be able to behave like a kid because she noticed he didn't even know how to play, she got him to play with him in a bouncing castle, she wanted him to smile, they worked together to save Dicks Batman and i always laugh when Damian teases her about "not having a big chest", Damian dear you were so fixated on that for no reason... Maybe Steph was also his first platonic crush... I think the second was Supergirl 😂😂.

(I miss them when they were like this... I miss them everyday 😭😭😭😭)

DCeased wasn't exactly one of my favorite comics regarding plot but it has a special place in my heart for being currently the only alternative universe that represented this sibling relationship as it was always meant to be until the disappointing death that was supposed to be solved by Talia and never happened as if they forgot.

That universe gave us a beautiful present and that was the very first time someone (wonder girl Cassie) officially acknowledged Stephanie as Damians big sister and not to mention the hug! 🥺���🥺 he actually let himself being comforted in her arms and hugged her back, when he saw her he even called her "Steph" Not "Brown" Or "Spoiler/Batgirl" and oh my god she became his Robin 🥲 and to me she is just the perfect Robin to his Batman after all... She was also the Batgirl to his Robin.

Another thing i want to point out, when Alfred was murdered Dick still didn't have all his memories, Jason was just too angry and Tim didn't do much, Barbara isn't that close to Damian so I think they totally should have used Stephanie here, Damian really could have used a big sister... Again wasting her character but I guess they wanted to use only the closest people to Alfred and sadly it looks like Steph isn't one... But she is an important person to Damian no matter how much DC wants to erase her, she will never dissapear! I can't believe Barbara and Rose Wilson and that pop out of nowhere post new 52 Maya are in that drawing of people who makes Damian feel loved BUT NOT STEPHANIE!! Even the horrible RA is there?! But not his mother or HIS FIRST AND IN MY OPINION BEST BIG SISTER FIGURE STEPHANIE!!! DC YOU HAVE A LOT TO ATONE FOR 😤😤😤😠😠😠😠

Fortunately the author of the webtoon family Wayne adventures has a better understanding of this and gave us the precious moments they deserve:

In my head this is Stephanie with her 3 best boys, the ex, the little platonic brother that might had or might not had a platonic crush on her and who i think is her very soulmate ❤💜

[signanothername]

Was nereid actually the cause of ccino’s alternative timelines being destroyed??? Because I know we haven’t really seen error but error… tends to not be one to leave a job unfinished

You’re completely right, it isn’t like Error to leave an Au without making sure it’s completely and utterly extinguished

But see, the trick is that, this is Nightmare’s guess, that it’s Error, and he’s right.. partially

It was Error who destroyed those alternative timelines of Fluffytale, Error worked his way up till the main timeline is all that’s left, the problem? Fluffytale’s main timeline’s code was already corrupted way before Error destroyed any of the alternative timelines

With Frisk missing, and resets were no more, Fluffytale existed in that sort of a limbo state, where the timelines that were created before Frisk went missing stayed there, but the creation of other timelines completely stopped, and with the supposed “main character” of the story gone, Fluffytale’s code ended up scrambled as it tried to repair itself, except there is always that hole in the code that the universe couldn’t patch up

But I think it’s important to explain how I see codes working in universes for this to make sense xgxhhdhd

The code of a universe that attaches to the multiverse as a whole is only truly attatched to the main timeline, and any other timeline has a code of its own that attaches to said main timeline of the universe itself

But other timlines are “copies” of the script, so when the corruption of the code happened, the code of the main timeline is the one truly affected, it didn’t affect any other the other alternative timelines

Think if it as a word document of the same subject, you make the first document and save it to your computer right? Then you decide you want to edit on the document without changing the og one, so you “save as” and put the new copy of the document under a new name

If you go and edit the og document, the copy won’t change cause of it, and if you edit the copy, the og document won’t change either

So when the main timeline’s code got corrupted, none of the codes for the alternative timelines changed

So Error didn’t face any problems (unless you count Ink a problem hchchcch) with destroying the alternative timelines, one by one, went in, “cleaned up”, went out

When he finally reached the main timeline, he tried destroying it, it didn’t go so well, his strings couldn’t even leave a single scratch on any of the code of the timeline, Error tries every trick in the book but nothing works

Eventually he realizes the problem, the code of the universe is corrupted, that of course doesn’t stop Error from trying to erase it, only whoops!! Turns out corrupted anomalous code (Error) dealing with corrupted anomalous code (Fluffytale) isn’t a smart idea

Fluffytale’s code deals with Errors code as a sister code, it wrongly identifies and recognizes it as part of its own code, and boom, it gains immunity to Error’s powers, and until Error’s able to find a way in which that mess can be dealt with, Fluffytale survives

Of course Error threw a tantrum over it, but there’s nothing to be done, so he left the universe alone and went to eat chocolate and talk to anomaly #13 to cope chhcchhcfh

———

Context

[ourlittleuluru]

Okay... So... I was on a spree taking screenshots for Xavier's Floral Blessing memory, right?

While I was taking the screenshots I heard this VERY SPECIFIC melody and the piano in the BGM of the memory. I could feel my brain just flip a dang switch like some kinda flash back or something...! ∑( 口 ||

Thing is, music is always important to storytelling, especially medias like games and movies.

Now, I won't go too deep into an analysis because there's an amazing analysis and breakdown written by @rose-tinted-kalopsia (i might chip in my own stuff that I noticed in another post in future...)

Some bits of spoilers I guess

OKAY

SO

It's plainly obvious this new Memory of Xavier's is something that kind of comes full circle, making parallels to his previous stories in our dearly beloved traumatizing Anecdote 3 (When shooting stars fall) and his Lightseeker Myths. A lot character building and development and seeing how Xavier's grown as a character.

Not much surpise there.

BUT

listen.. again... when I hear the BGM... I WAS HECKING LOCKED IN BECAUSE THE DEVS ARE VERY MUCH AWARE AND JUST!!!! 😭

I went back through ALL the Kindled of ALL of Xavier's 5 star memories, and took a listen to the BGMs.

As very much expected, all the kindleds just use either one of Xavier's BGM that you can earn from his Affinity Level, one of the more generic BGMs that's shared, or one that is thematic to the series (like No Restraint)

FLORAL BLESSING THO

THE MOMENT I HEAR THAT ONE LINE FROM THE PIANO...

Floral Blessing is using the SAME BGM that is played when you read his Anecdote 3. SPECIFICALLY ONLY ANECDOTE 3! (okay it plays when you're in his Anecdote menu too but it changes after you select an anecdote to read)

AND GUESS WHEN ELSE THIS BGM PLAYS?!

YES, HIS LIGHTSEEKER MYTH CARD, specifically Lightseeking Shadowrend

They are drawing ALL the Parallels, no holds barred

[heaven-s-black-box]

Notes- Sleeping In Hydro boys

Return to File

Recovery date: September 26th, 2024

Description: yes ik im kinda insane but rlly, take ur time and take a rest :) so the sleeping in headcanons part 2 with the hydro boys :D tysmmm

-⭐️ anon

Notes: This work was recovered in conjunction with researcher ⭐️, we thank them for their contributions. So fluffy, unfortunately 90% of Genshin characters seem incapable of sleeping in. Also, Xingqiu's is platonic, or I guess it could be seen as young love.

Back to directory

Childe

He gets up at the asscrack of dawn to train

But, sometimes he pushes himself too hard on missions, so he sleeps in

Especially after using his delusion

He doesn't even do it on purpose, but you'll wake up before him buried in his chest

You can't pull away even if you're worried you'll hurt him, his grip around your waist is too strong

Reach up and run your fingers through his hair, he's so tense even in his sleep

When he's not injured he trains, and if you aren't awake by the time he finishes and showers, he'll join you back in bed

He pretends to sleep to try and keep you in bed, but you know he's awake

You do enjoy the cuddles though, never knowing when they might be your last

Neuvillette

Does not sleep in

He's always gone by the time you wake up so that you can go to sleep together 

But  after Focalors destroys the hydro throne, he finds himself exhausted

So much power so suddenly, his body needs to adjust

For once, you wake up before him and curl further into his chest

You admire his sleeping features and he wakes up to you twirling his hair in your fingers

His body feels so heavy  and he knows he needs to wake up, but maybe 5 more minutes wouldn't hurt

He buries his face into the top of your head and takes a deep breath as his grip around you tightens

You wake again to a Melusine knocking at your front door, concerned about the Iudex

Ayato

The only way to get him to sleep in is if he's sick or seriously injured

Despite everyone telling him to take a break, he can't

So when he comes down with a cold so bad he can't walk straight, you literally have to wrangle him to bed

He only settles down once Ayaka and Thoma promise to take care of everything

He sleeps until noon, you keep checking to make sure has breathing

Despite his mouth breathing, he can't breath through his nose right now, he looks adorable

And peaceful

You wish he would take a break so you could snuggle into the late morning, but you don't want to get sick right now

After he's recovered, he takes one more day claiming he still feels a bit off kilter

This time though, you wake up in his arms and he refuses to let you leave

Thoma ends up bringing your breakfast to your room

Xingqiu

Understands the importance of rest, so he does sleep in sometimes

Mostly when he sleeps over with you, Chongyun, and Xiangling

Everyone gravitated towards Chongyun's cool aura in their sleep

So you all wake up in a pile

Xingqiu enjoys this, being a kid

He's got so much pressure on him that sometimes he wants to sleep until noon and wake up with his friends

Breakfast is always a new recipe by Xiangling 

He knows he'll always look back at these moments fondly, and he hopes they can last a bit long

[wangmiao]

From being stuck in the snow together in 2016 to filming Tibetan Sea Flower - Nan Pai San Shu's "Obsession" over Zhang Luyi.

Thank you for noticing my tag in the other post about the friendship between ZLY and CMH, and showing some interest. So here we go! I guess besides why Zhang Luyi (ZLY) was picked, there's also the story about how everything started. I find it rather fascinating. DMBJ's author Nan Pai San Shu, aka Xu Lei (XL) told the story a few years ago, but he mentioned it again during a livestream when Tibetan Sea flower (TSF) just started airing. The next three paragraphs are based on XL's livestream and ZLY's interviews.

Back in 2016, on a very snowy day, XL was on his way to The Mystic Nine's filming location, and was stuck on a mountain road. After waiting for a while, he thought he should go and help direct the traffic. When he got out to do it, he surprisingly found another Good Samaritan already doing what he intended to do, and yes, that Good Samaritan was ZLY.

ZLY was on his way to The Mystic Nine's filming location too. It was actually not XL who picked him for the role of Wu Laogou then. He went to guest star in that show because his university classmate Bai Yicong, the producer of the show, asked ZLY to do him a favor and just stop by to have a meeting with everyone.

So that's how XL and ZLY first met in person. Because they got stuck in the snow for a LONG time, they talked a lot about DMBJ, from Wu Laogou to Wu Xie, and even TSF (ZLY already read some of the DMBJ novels at the time, and he finished all of them before shooting TSF). At some point, XL told ZLY that ZLY's vibe reminded him of a very important character of his, which was Wu Xie. ZLY was very moved and thankful. Since they had such a good long talk, they kind of made a promise to each other that they'd work together on a DMBJ project at some point. They also each made a weibo post about meeting each other as the traffic director in the snow.

In 2017, there was actually quite some rumors about ZLY being approached to play Wu Xie in Sha Hai/Tomb of the Sea (this is not to discredit other Wu Xie actors, because it's normal for a production team to approach multiple actors for a role in the casting stage), but since ZLY had several health issues due to being injured during the filming of another show, he really couldn't be a candidate for the role.

But XL never forgot about ZLY. In 2021, rumors came around again about ZLY being approached to play Wu Xie in TSF, and this time, he agreed.

During the airing of TSF, XL did a lot of livestreams and Q&A sections on weibo. There's one post where he said: "From the state in the beginning, the state of being lost, to the Sha Hai!Xie state in the end, the entire progress is shown in TSF. I needed an actor with extremely good acting skills. From TSF!Xie to Sha Hai!Xie, there're many occasions where Wu Xie's soul is in a dark place and he might fall for his obsession. Besides Pangzi being there to pull him back, it also needs Wu Xie's strong faith and goodness, and I think it needed acting skills to show it."

In another comment to a fan's question about the choice of Wu Xie's actor, XL answered: "Maybe it represents a kind of inner demons", which I think the inner demons part can be translated to obsession.

So you can tell, it does seem that XL had this obsession to have ZLY play Wu Xie no matter what. And he never gave up the idea ever since they first met, even though by the time they could finally work together in 2022, ZLY was no longer in the best age range to play TSF!Xie (hence, sometimes you'd notice those annoying filters used to mask wrinkles on his face).

I really haven't watched all of XL's livestreams and interviews, and from the very few ones I've watched, he mentioned where ZLY impressed him. Before the shooting started, ZLY double checked with XL to see if XL wanted him to play Wu Xie as a more straightforward northerner or gentler southerner (this is not to stereotype, but to reflect the cultural and language difference), and XL reassured him to be a southerner since Wu Xie is a from the south of China. ZLY was no stranger to playing a southerner even though he's a northerner himself, as some of his best characters were from south China. This was why he dropped all his natural Beijing accent, and showed a gentler demeanor (eg. Pangzi is a typical northerner, and CMH kept his Beijing accent).

Another thing is when they were shooting the real and fake Wu Xie scene, it was filmed without any special effects or even an extra actor. ZLY played both characters each time with thin air. It impressed XL a lot because it required so much more finesse and precision on the memory, timing, and movement.

Lastly I want to show you ZLY's goodbye message to TSF that was posted on Sep 24th. He's a very dedicated, sincere, and cultured actor that often uses handwritten stuff to say goodbye to shows nowadays. And he wrote what Wu Xie and Pangzi always say to each other, the good luck and good fortune thing: "Da Ji Da Li, Gong Xi Fa Cai"

Another fun fact is that ZLY is very good at calligraphy. He used to assign different fonts to the characters he played based on their characteristics. Because Wu Xie writes in 瘦金体/Shoujin font, ZLY wrote the message also in Shoujin font. I guess you can say that's another similarity between him and Wu Xie, that they can both write in this font (I'm no expert in calligraphy, so I found an article teaching people how to write in Shoujin font. It was definitely not an easy thing to do because it advised people to learn and practice certain fonts in traditional calligraphy for a few years before even going for the Shoujin font).

Thanks for reading! If you like ZLY's Wu Xie, that's awesome. If not, that's OK. It's totally understandable. Please also know that I have zero intention to compare his version of Wu Xie to other Wu Xies. I'm sure each Wu Xie is awesome, unique, and lovable in his own way.

[diamondcitydarlin]

Alright real talk now without sassiness bc the whole anti thing against beetlebabes has me thinking about self-indulgent fantasy as a literary/storytelling device and it's something I've been thinking about with different medias lately, so this is topical ig for my current hyperfixation. Specifically I've been thinking about fantasy disavowal and the role that plays in self-indulgent/self-insert type fantasy stories, whether canon or extrapolated within fanfic. I first really learned about this concept in name from this video from contrapoints, so I have to give her credit for discussing this and explaining to me how it works in a way that blew my mind apart at the time, and I think it's the sort of thing that puts a lot of what goes on in self-indulgent fantasy stories into a different perspective, particularly when we're trying to evaluate said stories under an IRL moral microscope (and is why that approach pretty much never works or applies within this kind of story)

(Semi-long post under the cut where I mention Harry Potter as an example of a literary device- as I say within the writeup, I do not condone or support JKR or her beliefs and this is not an endorsement of her but rather a well-known example I think most people will recognize. Be aware if it's triggering for you. I also mention Twilight lol, incase that's an issue. It takes me a minute to get to Beetlejuice/Beetlebabes but I promise this is all relevant to my point, your honors)

Recently I saw a discussion within a Twilight fan group I'm in (yes I'm a Twilight fan and a rattie iykyk) about how toxic certain characters behavior would be IRL, particularly in the way several of them have a habit of making choices for Bella against her will, gifting her with things she's said she didn't want and insisting she use/wear them, etc etc. As a former Twilight hater (cuz I used to be that too many years ago!!!) I knew where they were coming from in being critical of these characters and calling them toxic, because in any other setting that would absolutely be true. Within fantasy disavowal, however, these 'toxic' behaviors are actually a way for the reader/writer (who is living vicariously through the main character) to have the main character get what they think she should have and want her to have without compromising her character or the integrity of the fantasy. Bella Swan, for example, is meant to be modest, selfless, 'not like other girls' and usually uncomfortable with bringing too much attention to herself (which makes her relatable to those who would live vicariously through her story), but of course many of those reading WANT her to have a big wedding and traditional dress anyway so that's where, for example, Alice's insistence she have those things comes into play. Yes, IRL that would be controlling, obsessive, weird, and a complete disregard of someone's wishes and boundaries but in a self-insert fantasy that tactic serves an important role to the purpose and point of the setting. WELL if you INSIST, Alice, I guess I'll just take your very generous and expensive gifts and deal with it, sigh, oh WELL!!! /s In that sense it's less demeaning and more empowering, if you're viewing it from the pov of someone wanting to immerse themselves in the fantasy.

Another example of where this is kinda used in self-insert fantasy is Harry Potter (and many others like it, and this isn't to condone JKR's terfism, this is just the example I think most people will recognize), wherein the children reading are meant to want to live vicariously through Harry and his friends and their adventures. For those children reading (and I know bc I was one once lol) the idea of being in a dangerous environment that the adults don't really shield them from entirely is very cool, it gives them a sense of independence and self-sufficiency and a sense of 'trust' from the fictional adults in their abilities to take care of themselves. From an adult's perspective now, particularly one with a child of first-year age, it's seemingly horrific how neglectful and reckless the adults in that series are with the wellbeing of the children they're responsible for (like, idk, sending a bunch of 11 year olds into the known death forest for their first detention sentence, at night, while knowing some beast is eating unicorns in said forest). But of course, within the story this constant, casual endangerment of children is never really brought up as an issue or as a reflection of some kind of immortality in the adults responsible for them as it would IRL, because it serves the purpose of self-indulgent fantasy for the children reading. It's not MEANT to be seen as a moral failing or child endangerment AT ALL so much as just the adults characters getting the fuck out of the way so the kids can have fun- unless it's like Umbridge doing it, who is established as an villain and immoral even in that setting from the jump. (And again this isn't a defend JKR post, just an explanation/example of what I'm talking about) IDK if this qualifies as fantasy disavowal perse, but it's a similar phenomenon of how behaviors -particularly those of supporting characters- can seem immoral/toxic under a real world lens but within the story serves a purpose to the reader living through the fantasy.

The way this relates to Beetlebabes for me is mostly fanon focused, but I think there are elements of disavowal in the canon as well. A lot of us who ship beetlebabes feel a kinship to Lydia in some way or another, especially those of us who watched the first film and cartoon as we ourselves were coming of age (and also probably weirdo goth kids too at the same time, I definitely was lol) and while it obviously isn't a fantasy for everyone, for a lot of us the idea of a 600-year old demon choosing and becoming obsessed with our weirdo asses BECAUSE of our weirdness is really cool actually lmao. To others, Beej pursuing Lydia so ardently against her outspoken disavowal can only be seen as intentionally toxic because they're not part of the fantasy, nor do they want to be, so seeing the merits (and empowerment) of his pursuit within this setting is beyond them. And of course, there's something to be said for the inherent nature of gothic romance as a setting, as well as the fact that movieverse Beetlejuice isn't really meant to be the pinnacle of moral direction in real life, it's meant to be a creepy, kooky dark comedy that pushes the boundaries of societal norms (not unlike what we do in the shadows). As others have said, this also isn't unlike the film Labyrinth much at all, though I RARELY see anyone coming after the Jareth/Sarah ship despite Sarah being a child in the film and Jareth being, yknow, also an ancient spirit of some kind. Perhaps because most people better understand how Labyrinth functions as a self-insert fantasy, that Jareth's obsession with Sarah is meant to be an empowering thing within that context for the young people like Sarah watching it, not an endorsement of IRL predatory behavior (ofc, Jareth being mostly a creation of Sarah's might aid with the sense of her power over the situation).

Honestly, I think it's also true for a lot of people against Beetlebabes that they identify with Lydia too, but in a way that doesn't include wanting a 600-year old demon to be obsessed with them (you do you boo, more of him to go around ig lmaooo), but instead of seeing and accepting the merits of Beej's obsession in this other kind of fantasy, they instead choose to apply real-world morals onto not only the story but the people who enjoy this story as well as their personal discomfort demands. For as much as they want to accuse others of 'not having media literacy' for shipping it, they sure jump right over the point of this literary/storytelling device. And to that end, I can't wholly blame them, because it was only within the last few years that I really realized and accepted how this works too- but I'm doing my best to explain it now, for whomever is interested.

I guess what I'm ultimately trying to say is that self-insert/self-indulgent type fantasy stories are, by design, not meant to be viewed through a real-world moral lens. The entire point of them is to transport a reader/viewer into a world where real-life doesn't apply, where someone like them is loved and obsessed over for the things that they are often disparaged for IRL and within a context where they (and the main character) still hold the reigns of control, as Lydia does over Beetlejuice time and time again (despite being a powerful 600 year old demon Beej sure lets his wife kick him around a lot, doesn't he???). It's not meant to be an endorsement or romanticization or even a depiction of IRL immorality either, as that would ruin the effect of the fantasy.

So yeah, I feel like trying to evaluate most of these stories in a real-world moral context is a fundamental misunderstanding of how this kind of storytelling works- that's not to say one can't evaluate them that way if they want, and sometimes (like other things used within the HP series) it's due, but I think it definitely becomes an issue when this 'moral evaluation' turns into one of the people who enjoy the fantasy too. The fictional flights of fancy that people like to immerse themselves into are just that; fantasy. And what's more, different people like living vicariously through different kinds of fantasies, different people are going to find different things empowering in said stories and just because one thing feels empowering for one person but demeaning to another should not mean the former person is immoral and gross in real life or would even want these things to happen in real way.

I keep trying to wrap this post up and failing, but that's basically it. I'm posting this because I know others will probably have way more intellectual insight and feedback to add about this kind of storytelling and I just think it's really fascinating to talk about. What do yall think?

[nikki152006]

the letter | Hawks X Reader

oneshot; (wrote it some 3 yrs ago and edited the narration here)

(it was a result for a "write a letter to mha characters" quiz of mine)

.

"Calm down, will you?" Tokoyami says over the phone, "I can not believe it's me of all people who needs to console you."

"Well, it was your idea." you pace your room in stress.

"It was dark shadow's idea." Tokoyami doesn't sound happy at your accusation, "I even warned you against trusting him just like that. His maturity level is down in the drain. That all put aside, I really do think you should relax. Definitely, sensei wouldn't hate you."

"He wouldn't hate me?" you frown and take a deep inhale, "I wrote that guy a love letter and we left it in his office, Tokyo!"

"I do not see how that should make him hate you.. " Tokoyami sounds confused, "Hawks sensei has quite a following, it would only be normal to him if you ended up having feelings for him too. Relax, it's no big deal."

"Oh my God." you clutch your head, "Is this how you're consoling me? I don't know what to do– is there a chance he wouldn't have seen it? I really just want to bring the letter back now."

"Wow." Dark shadow's voice sounds, "That's really spineless of you," you gasp at that, "relax, (Name)-chan. Everything's gonna be fine. If Hawks sensei ignores you, I'll fight him for you."

You pause, "Ignores? You know what, I'll call you and Dark Shadow back later, Tokyo. The both of you are only increasing my anxiety."

"Okay." Tokoyami sighs, "And stop calling me Tokyo."

"No." you hang up right after.

Continuing to pace in the room, you begin to prepare yourself for the worse. It's true Hawks could just ignore you if he gets uncomfortable with the whole thing. If not that, he could just reject your feelings.

After all, he does get thousands of letters per day (though none are found at his table top in his office) and like Tokoyami said, it would be only normal for him to have a little girl crush on him.

You're two weeks away from your birthday and do not at all wish to be crying over his rejection on the day you turn eighteen. 

"It's alright." you try to console yourself, "There's a lot more beauty in this world to cry over just one guy." but it's easier said than done.

No matter how true your words are, they do nothing to ease the way your throat suffocates in anxiety."

Your phone buzzes with notifications on the side and you pick it up to distract yourself with whatever they're from only to find an unknown number having texted you.

__________________________

XXXXXXX

heyy

you really thought you'd 

send him a letter and BOOM

he's into you, huh

haha, bitch

stop daydreaming

look at this 

seriously

stop embarrassing yourself

there's other important ppl

in his life

__________________________

Your brain processes the texts way too slow. Once it does, however, you feel something in your heart shatter.

A picture of Hawks blushing and another of him covering his face combined with the texts you've received explain a lot. 

There's other important people in his life.

It makes sense– you don't know much about his person life. You only know Hawks the hero not the person who he is away from the limelight.

It makes sense, absolute sense, but it hurts. 

"It's okay." you mumble futile and empty words to yourself, one hand making way to your chest and rubbing it hard. The ache lying within overpowers even the peak of control you can exert over yourself.

A tear rolls down your cheek. At this point, you don't even know what else you were expecting.

"I am just another fangirl." you tell yourself, "It's alright. That's what happens, I'm no one special– I barely know about his personal life."

A ding brings in new messages from the same number.

__________________________

XXXXXXX

we've got some things to settle

fifteen minutes from now

on your dorm roof

lets fight

YOU

lets please talk it out

it's nothing serious

I guess I'm just a fangirl

XXXXXXX

ask me if I give a fuck

__________________________

It hurts you to reply this way but this is just the truth.

But how can someone enter U.A.? I don't think non pro heroes would be allowed to enter.

And this thought leads to the rather painful realization that the person texting you might just be Mirko, you know Hawks is good friends with her so there could always be things between them that you aren't aware of.

It's just best to go and talk to her and clear out any misunderstandings. Who knows what sort of ruckus might follow.

You violently rub your teary eyes and swallow hard, "Well then."

There's no one on the roof when you reach there. With a sigh, you walk over to the boundary and lean against it taking in the view of the night at your school.

The suffocating weight on your chest remains constant but the worry about what Hawks would think of you beats it.

It hurts to remember how seriously you had written the letter and poured all of your ehart into it. Now, you only feel like an idiot.

Why the fuck did I even think this was okay?

If you could, you'd make everything go back to before you'd written it. All the worry, all the nervousness and this painful rejection-- you sigh.

"Pretty, isn't it?"

You haven't paid attention to the view until now. At once, you blink focusing your gaze in front. A small smile rises up your face, "It's beautiful." and then you pause.

"You didn't even notice me sneaking up to you." the way too familiar from the snort makes a tsunami of heat crash against your body, you snap your head to where Hawks is leaned to the boundary by your side.

"Hawks." your jaw falls a mile below.

"Yup." he smiled, "I had to come, didn't I?"

On reflex, you look around to see if someone else has come with him but not another soul is around.

"You're.. " you swallow hard, a mountain of shame settling in your face, "Uhm... well.. "

Hawks hums, his face turned towards the school building in view, "I thought I'd just talk to you face to face. I was on my way to Musutafu anyways."

"O-Oh.. ?"

"So you wrote me a letter." there's the tiniest bit of tease in his voice, "You think I'm handsome, eh, (Name)-chan? Boy, I did not know that."

Your face falls into your hands. You wish the earth would swallow you whole.

"Well," he hums a moment later, "I sort of saw the letter in front of Mirko and she urged we should prank you so she took those pictures of me while I was reading the letter. I don't know what she's texted you though. She said you'd be happy to see me in person."

It takes you a while to process the thing about the pictures.

You don't have it inside you to face him anymore but the relief you feel on knowing this was a pranks expresses itself as a sharp exhale.

Hawks' face turns to you again, a sly smirk rising to his face, "You weren't getting jealous, were you? Ahh, I really want to see a jealous (Name)-chan. Your little crush on me makes this so much easier."

With great difficulty, you manage to separate your face and hands and try to lift your head.

"Oh right," Hawks snorts, "it's not a crush, it's love."

"Come on." you whine, turning your face away.

Hawks laughs, "You're adorable, (Name)-chan. Don't you worry, you'll still be on my priority list of little girls crushing on me."

"Look at how proud you are about that." you roll your eyes hysterically, "Shameless chicken."

"Aw, don't you think being mean to me makes me not want to hang out with you?" he dramatizes, "I thought we get careful when we get a puppy crush."

You're honestly just glad he isn't hating or getting creeped out by you.

"You were on your way to Musutafu?" you try to change the topic, "For what?"

Hawks hums a little, his gaze focused on the distantly visible city, "Say, (Name)-chan. You're of age, right? Your birthday was three months ago so you should be eighteen already."

"I am, yeah." your gaze rests on him for a bit- Hawks looks beautiful in the low night light.

He turns to you, "I was coming to Musutafu for this date I have to be on. I realized I should confirm your age outside the school. Nezu looked pretty relaxed when I said I want to visit you so that was relieving."

You blink, "I'm sorry?" there's a darker shade settling on his face now that you focus.

"Takami Keigo." he hums, "That's my real name."

The sudden revelation takes you by surprise, "Oh? I.. wow. That's a nice name."

"Of course," he snorts though there is now something adorably nervous to his voice, "your crush on me makes everything about me nice."

"Other than your personality, yes." you pout, "Look at you insensitively teasing me. Are you wishing to see me cry later?"

"Ne ne, (Name)-chan, you really think I'd let you cry?" he turns you towards himself.

You blink, "H-Huh?"

Hawks smiles nervously, "D'you.. you know.. want to go out with me tonight?"

It takes an eternity for your brain to process it. Once you do, your jaw drop in shock only to tug upwards immediately into a smile.

"What? What.. seriously?"

"Of course." his hand rubs the back of his head, Hawks looks embarrassed, "I-I mean.. it's not important that your crush is one sided.. "

"You like me?" you don't remember when the last time you'd been filled with such pure thrill was. You're basically jumping on your feet.

"If you're going to behave like this, how do you expect me not to?" he pouts and speaks in a small voice.

"Wow." your gaze locks into his, "That's just... "

"Sweet?" his hand boops your nose, "It is. But anyways, should we?" he holds his hand out.

You're about to put your hand onto his put pause, "Has Aizawa sensei allowed you to take me out." you pause, "Shit, I'm not even dressed right." and you continue to freak out more in happiness than in worry.

Hawks chuckles, "You're being pretty reasonable for someone who gets to be with the sexy hot number two." and the sassy reply he expects doesn't come.

You wrap your hands around him instead, "I am."

A gush of red burns his cheeks, Hawks lips part, "Wh-Whoa.. okay." his eyebrows jerk, and his head turns to the side now radiating with heat.

"Shit." you step away from him, "I'm not making you uncomfortable or something, am I?"

"Not at all." Hawks's eyes lock into yours, "That's.. actually leave the date. Let's go to your room and watch a movie or something."

"Boys aren't allowed in our side of the dorm." you make a sad face.

"I'm a man if you haven't noticed." he frowns, "Take me down there, I'll make sure you never miss my manliness again."

Your eyes widen and avert to the side and a buzz rises up your skin. Hawks looks pretty dead set with his little tease and is happy to see the reaction he was expecting.

It's risky sneaking Hawks inside so he sends in a feather first. Thankfully, there's no one in the hallways at this hour.

You let Hawks inside first and enter after securing the area. Little do you realize you've pushed him right into the one wall full of posters of him. You thank yourself for not having pasted hearts or something of the sort around.

"Looks like you have a major crush on this pro hero Hawks." he looks smug but the warm red tint of his ears adds more to the story, "That's so cute."

Your cheeks flare up, "W-Well.. th-there's nothing to hide anymore.. I guess."

Hawks hums, "You'll be knowing me as Keigo no onwards." he leans forward and pulls a poster down, crushes it and throw it to the side.

"What are you doing?" you frown in confusion.

"There's a lot of other things you need space to stick on the walls." he says, "Things about Takami Keigo and not Hawks," a teasing smirk rises up his face again, "and then you can continue to thirst over a sexier side of your hero crush."

You pout and turn away, face now warming up the air all around, "You're so mean, Hawks." there's a silence, "K-Keigo-san.. "

"Good girl." he hums, making all hair on your body rise on their ends, "Try it less formal."

You swallow, "Keigo-kun.. ?"

"Yeah." his hand strokes your cheek, you feel your legs getting weak, "That's more like it, babybird."

"You're literally so mean." your gaze averts to the ground, "Coming all the way here just to tease me.. "

"And maybe also to see you get excited like a little kid when I say it's mutual." he winks, then plops onto your bed, rubbing his face into the pillow.

The thing about the number two pro hero is that the confidence seeps out of all pores in his body. Even if he is shy and nervous, Hawks would unapologetically spread around knowing it would not at all change anything about your feelings for him unless it makes them more intense.

He knows that because he has seen the expression on your face when the two of you would mess around and do weird stuff to annoy Tokoyami (although it was mostly you).

Hawks would have a bigger hand in verbal teasing.

"S-So... " you fiddle with your fingers, cheeks heating up more at the thought of his scent settling onto your sheets. Hawks turns to you.

"Movie?"

"I-If you want to."

"Or maybe we could just.. you know," he playfully winks.

You freeze momentarily, "What... ?"

Hawks snorts, his hand taking his visors and ruffling his hair. He beckons you to come sit with him while taking his shoes and jacket off.

You now find it hard to not stare at his torso.

"Should we have a photoshoot?" he turns to you, eyes full of adoration.

It's too bad that your dirty mind is not able to process anything rationally on being exposed to his biceps now. And it just so happens that you and Hawks are awfully comfortable with teasing and insults on being friends for so long (all thanks to Tokoyami).

That is why the words slip out of your mouth before you can realise, "If you strip, yes."

Hawks blinks, his ears visibly getting a hot shade of red but expressions forced to remain straight, "You really have some wild fantasies about me, babygirl. Tokoyami told me all of them."

You blink, "What?"

He smiles cheekily, "If I strip, you'll lose your head."

"No- Tokoyami did what?"

"Told me some stuff." he hums, "Told me I should get a spine to propose to you but then boom, you send the letter and it gets easier for me."

"He knew you liked me back?"

"Of course he did." Hawks pushes his boots to the side with his foot, "Don't you go getting mad at him," his hands plant on your hips, cheeks blooming red, "this is my payment for this request."

In another second, you're sitting in his lap.

"So, photoshoot." he clears his throat, unable to properly talk now that your body is pressed against his with your adorable eyes looking up at him in shock and embarrassment, "I-I'll use my phone."

[mychemisgay]

Yuji, the main character of the story is the son of Kenjaku (big bad mastermind of the series) and part of Sukuna's soul (final big bad in the series). These seem like important plot points, right? Wrong, they go exactly nowhere.

If you think about it, the story would be the exact same if Yuji was just an unusually strong human. He gets told he's a really good vessel for Sukuna, most other people probably wouldn't be able to contain him, but no one, not even Yuji questions why that is. It's just accepted at the start, so they start feeding him the fingers. No one thinks it's kinda suspicious how strong he was even as a non-sorcerer. Literally no one cares, it's just accepted in the manga, quirky main character syndrome I guess.

Then why make these interesting plot points about his parents as one off remarks? The reader gets baited into thinking these will all tie together, then gets blue balled.

Why did Sukuna mention towards the end of the whole manga, that Yuji was made from part of his soul (his would-be twin that he consumed before birth) and that Kenjaku wouldn't make a kid for no reason? We could see Sukuna hated being in Yuji so what was Kenjaku's plan? As soon as he could Sukuna dipped and posessed Megumi instead. So what even was Kenjaku's plan with creating Yuji? Even Sukuna said he doesn't fucking know, and that's where we as readers are left at.

Also, we got the conversation with Yorozu, Sukuna told her she could do whatever with him if he lost. What was the point of that out-of-place conversation in the middle of a mediocre fight? Logically it could have been foreshadowing as to what will happen when Sukuna is actually defeated in the series.

When Sukuna lost against Yuji, he could have done anything with his body, and with Yuji wanting to help him, he probably should have eaten him. Even the deal they made in Yuji's domain went something like "give back Fushiguro and come back to me OR I will kill you." Sukuna gave back Megumi, so by that logic he should have gone back to Yuji, probably by Yuji eating him. But no. Nothing comes from this at all, he just fucking dies.

Man, Gege is the true potential man (gn).

[meggannn]

rambling thoughts here, and not to be all doom and gloom, but: i think i saw this coming when bioware announced htla won't matter in veilguard, so in my head i'm not surprised, but my heart is still very disappointed to find out the leak of imported choices showing ~3 decisions really is all we're getting.

i’ve been feeling for a while that every new game from bioware is probably going to aim to appeal to new players going forth, and i’m preparing myself that the choice importations we know them for are likely gone for good. inquisition was very new player-friendly despite being only a few years after da2 (which is fine) but ten years later, 0% of origins matters, 0% of awakening matters, 0% of 2 matters, and ~5% of inquisition matters. ten years from now, veilguard will be old news too, and it’ll be the next new batch of players they’re after. dragon age's proudest feature, its connective tissue tracking your changes between games, is basically a thing of the past, and i'm honestly expecting the same of mass effect going forward.

it makes showcasing varric and morrigan prominently in the trailers feel even worse, and i was already unhappy with how much space they're taking up. i'd guessed it was nostalgia bait, but now that we know they won't remember or mention hawke, hawke's lover, the warden, kieran, the well... their inclusion feels like insecurity that their game won't do well without these characters, but they don't, or can't, commit to expanding on the many variations that these characters can be.

based off of his lines in the trailers, i'm prepared to just be seeing varric the quip machine, who conveniently won't mention any details about hawke, but i'm sure his possible guilt over his role in his friend's death won't affect his personality at all when he's establishing yet another hero in the making; and a one-size-fits-all morrigan who is now the same character regardless of "i will not be the mother you were to me" or whether she drank any interesting bathwater. who cares, it's morrigan in the trailer! she's swooping! you guys like swooping, right? (by this point i fully expecting them to dig out varric's resurrected corpse in 2035 to get people to buy dragon age 5. and the frustrating thing is that it will work.)

i've had the suspicious sense that veilguard was made for solavellan players (and new players) first, everyone else second, and this news is not really changing my mind. i'm not happy, but i'm also not surprised.

[seaemberthesecond]

PLEASE tell me all about your textual support for Aurora/Declan, i am LISTENING 👀🙏🏻

This is heinously late and I'm so sorry for that 😭 but this is one of my FAVOURITE things to think about.

Aurora is such an interesting character to me, particularly in relation to Declan. For all that Ronan spends all of TRC furious that Declan has denied Aurora personhood ("She's nothing without Dad") and trying to keep her awake, it's actually through Declan's eyes that she really comes alive. Ronan's version of his mother is more one-dimensional than Declan's, ironically enough, even though he's the one who supposedly 'loves her more.' It's Declan who's spent his life grappling with the philosophical implications of her dreamt-ness and her replacement of his actual mother (which, in a stunning parenting move by Niall, only he seems to remember) and as a result, his feelings toward her are considerably more complicated than his brothers' and he's the only one who really seems to think deeply about her.

The mystery Aurora is shrouded in for Declan turns her into almost this... sinister figure in his mind. It's like - Niall is this known entity for Declan right? He doesn't think of him in nearly the same lionizing light Ronan does, because he actually knew Niall. He doesn't need to create a mythology around him the way Ronan has. His "hatred" for Niall is not only comparitively straightforward, it's self-aware. He knows exactly what his grievances with his father are and he knows that he doesn't even really hate him.

But with Aurora, he skirts around the thought of her. He can't even look his complicated feelings for her head-on. She's inscrutable to him, and that's kind of terrifying in a psych-thriller kind of way.

There's this unease that he associates with her in the text, that's just not there when he thinks about Niall. He's constantly second-guessing himself when it comes to Aurora re: how much did she know, how real she was etc. In Greywaren, there's this part where he's thinking about when he was sick as a child. And it's fascinating to me because there's this implication there that he didn't feel safe in the house with Aurora until Niall came back. He only relaxes and goes to sleep when Niall comes home. And it adds to this general malaise that Declan associates with Aurora.

I've talked before about how the secrets Declan is forced to keep are an allegory of sexual abuse, and in that light it's kind of damning when you consider that in the Lynch household, the arbiter of secrets is Aurora, not Niall. Throughout the Declan Christmas short, it's Aurora who's reinforcing the importance of secrets, who makes him help her hide them. She's the one who tells Declan that he has to keep Matthew's origin a secret. And in MI, it's Aurora who first tells Ronan that he needs to hide his dreaming and never show his dreams to anyone. So if we're looking at the text through the lens of allegory-for-csa, Aurora's position in the household becomes much more sinister because a lot of the harm that's been done to the kids and particularly Declan is attributable directly to her.

And then there's the fact that all the Ashleys' looked like her - there's something Freudian going on there for sure.

tl;dr while the textual evidence is slim lol it is there if you wanna see it and I am looking with a magnifying glass. Was any of this done with authorial intent? Probably not, but who cares?

And this is where stuff diverts from the text itself and veers more into my spin on things, but everything about Aurora/Declan becomes insanely compelling to me when you think about it in relation to Mor. Mor is the hole inside Aurora. Imagine you're a young woman who was molested her whole life by a family member and now you're out-of-touch with your own emotions and you have this kid and you think you love him with this man and you think you love him too. But you know you're fucking them up, so you and your husband dream a version of you that's perfect. She's the perfect wife and the perfect mother and you've sanded down all the edges and sharp, spiky parts that make you you because you think that's the version of yourself your family deserves and then you leave. But you can't dream anything without putting your pain inside it. So you have this hollow half-woman walking around with a pain inside her she doesn't know how she got and a life she doesn't remember and the only person who seems to have any answers is this kid that she think is her own but is he really? And in her attempt to feel the shape of the hole in her she re-enacts your trauma on your kid.

I am EATING GLASS. The cycles are CYCLING. NO ONE talk to me.

[nemaliwrites]

happened upon this article today, and damn if it didn't get me thinking

i've wondered a lot before about how the same story can be told through different mediums [which primarily can be seen through adaptations] but one thing i don't spend enough time thinking about is how the same story can be told through different word counts

i know people always are like 'a story is as long as it needs to be' but...is it?

i've technically run this experiment a few years ago, with Regrowth at exactly 100 words and Reduce, Reuse, Regrow at over 6000. honestly, it was kind of a fascinating experiment because....are they the same story? really? i guess at their core, you could argue that the plot is the exact same. tldr: giorno turns drug dealers into flowers. and that happens in both versions.

but there is no character in the drabble version, for the OCs and others. we don't get a sense of who giorno is in this story and why he's doing this - all we have to go off of is who he is in canon. we have no idea who tf marco [is that his name? i'm not rereading that to find out LOL] is - versus in the longer version we know about his connection to his family, his botanical garden, the plants he grows, etc. we know about his crush on Sofia. we know that mista saves him, which means giorno thinks he's someone worthy of being saved.

same thing for the police - they don't even get names in the drabble, compared to the names and personalities they're awarded in the longer version.

so...are they the same story?

i've been wondering [and by been wondering i mean i literally thought of this like an hour ago hehe] about how that can apply to other things as well, and this article is a terrific starting point. if you write your longfic as a oneshot, you have to pare down everything that 'doesn't matter' - which i'm using loosely, because as we've established, there are things important to a story that aren't just plot events. but you get such a clear distinction: what are the subplots vs the main plot? who are the side characters vs the main characters? if you have multiple antagonists, who is the one who drives the story primarily? without whom the story cannot exist any longer?

i wonder too if this, in a way, can kind of call back to the snowflake method - which i admittedly have never used but can see how it would be helpful. if you start small, let's say you write your story as a drabble. double it, and double it again. a few more times, and you have something short story length. then novella length. then novel length.

it could also be a way to literally build your story up piece by piece. okay, so you need a couple thousand more words. sure, you could just add a bunch of fluff or 'filler' - or, you could add in a subplot. you could add in a character that is integral to the story. and if you go the other way - from novel to drabble - and can't write a short story without that character, then you know how important they are.

in this way, you can kind of pare everything down to its barest bones, actually. character motivations, stakes, setting.....everything is tied together, which means changing one changes them all.

maybe at some point, you literally get to a point where you can't add anything else - and maybe that's where the story is as long as it needs to be. vice versa, too.

i will run this experiment a few more times and report back o7

[tremendouscreationperson]

Logan x Reader pt.16

They say you write what you know so Y/N is having a lil bit of a tough time

There be a little bit of a time jump - nothing major but I haven't written for a week and a bit so it felt necessary

It may not be massively long but don't worry, Victor is in this one, how we feeling about his characteristics? I want him to be the same but different because this world doesn't hate mutants but I don't know if I'm just butchering the character

<<Part 15 Masterlist

“So I'm conclusion, Dave, I'm still not having a great time. I'm being supportive of Gambit and Laura because they want to go to the X-Mansion and it kills me that she stays the night. Yeah, she texts me, lets me know how things are and sends me photos but she is making connections with people that I knew! She is becoming a member of the family. I returned home and it wasn't home. She returned there and it is. And I know that's selfish and stupid and I sound horrid but I am jealous. Jealous of my own daughter, fucking hell. I'm embarrassed about that too! Having to hide it from the others. Wade's off with the Avengers badgering Thor, Elektra has Maria and Natalie - oh no, sorry Natasha, they sent an agent to spy on us, I bet you're one, and the agent became friends, it's.... Anyway. Blade gets up to god knows what. And I'm lying to Logan. He asks for updates and I say I'm fine and I am really, I dunno why I'm moaning. I dunno why I'm making a huge deal out of this. But I'm sad. There's not really a logical reason for me to be sad but I am. And I tell him I’ve gone for a jog or I began a new book when in reality I barely get out of bed to feed the pigeons on my fire escape.” You held your arms, hugging yourself. “I dunno, and I know you're going to say communication is key, talk to everyone, but I don't want them to know I'm sad because I'm always sad. I don't want to be sad any more. I'm bored of it. I'm always the one that's struggling or that needs support and they always provide it but it gets tiring after a while, repeating the same task over and over again."

Dave's eyes pierced yours. He stared directly through them and at your brain, trying to dissect your thoughts straight from the source.

He observed your body language, how frustrated you were at yourself, how tired your bones were.

“First of all: communication is key.” You groaned. “Second of all: there are valid reasons for your lapse. You entered a place where you had made a home, you visited members of your family and they did not recognise or acknowledge who they were to you because they do not know. They are unaware of your pain, unaware that you share this bond. It is natural to feel displaced, especially with the bombardment of memories that you experienced, to be there in the past vs the future is striking, is jarring. And to top that off some of your closest frie-family have decided to make themselves at home there. Yes, you are jealous but you are hurt. Hurt that they would dare to go where you cannot. And I haven't even brought up your parents, yet.”

“Yeah.” You nodded. “Go ahead, why not?”

“Seeing your mother and father brings up your childhood trauma as well as feelings of neglect because she is doing well. She expressed pride when talking about mutants where your mother was scared. Was ashamed.”

You nod again, a lump in your throat preventing you from talking.

“And no it is not healthy to be lying to your partner. I'm sure he would not appreciate it and frankly I don't think he deserves to be lied to.

Fuck you.

“I guess it's just easier because it's texting.” You shrugged. “I couldn't lie to his face, not convincingly anyway. But he's found Victor and they seem to be getting along. I don't know why it was so important to find him. I don't think there was an actual reason to do so, I think it was the same reason I looked up my mom. I think he just needed to see his brother. Which I am not diminishing I just- I know it's important but I don't know why.. so I guess I'm confused about that, too?”

“You are feeling a lot of emotions.” He commented.

“Yeah,” your voice was an octave higher as you agreed. “I haven't felt like this in a long while.”

Dave's lip pulled in a half hearted smile and he began scratching down some notes. “Are you taking your meds?”

“I have been yes.” At your last session Dave had given you a prescription for some antidepressants. Well, no they were more like antianxieties but that didn't really roll off the tongue as well. You had seen Dave twice before this and, as everyone says, each time did get easier. He was still as curt as ever but you grew to appreciate that. No use in a therapist that coddled you.

“We may need to up them if you still feel like this in two months.”

“Two months?!”

“Medication takes its time to get into your system. The only pills that work instantaneously are placebos.”

Fair play.

“How's your sleep pattern?”

“Oh, did I tell you I found a coping mechanism?” He waved his hand for you to proceed. “At night when the nightmares come I do this-” you wrapped a field around yourself but this one was different. This field was stronger, was lighter, was flexible. Moulded to your very being. You had never been able to form anything like this before but one night in sheer terror you accidentally created it. It felt warm. Like a security blanket. “- and I don't feel as bad.”

“That's very good.” He smiled, his eyes scanning your body. “Is that new? The invisibility?”

“The what?” The field immediately fell.

“You were invisible.”

“I beg your finest pardon.”

“Y/N. You were invisible.” You weren't. You could see yourself when the field wrapped around your limbs, it was just the familiar purple hue around your body. “Did you not know?”

“I haven't been able to do that.” It sounded like a question. “I can see myself!"

"I couldn't."

"I have a new power? So I can heal and I can turn invisible? Wh-what else did Stark do to me?!”

“I'm sure Tony Stark didn't mean for this particular side effec-”

“Well, what side effects did he mean for?”

Dave didn't answer you, he let out a sigh and scribbled down on his paper.

~~

Walking home was fine. You stopped off to grab some seeds - the pigeons liked peanuts the best but they ate anything so you might be wrong - and ended up back at your apartment block in no time.

In the elevator your thoughts were wild, bouncing off the box walls.

So invisibility was a thing.

You could be invisible.

That wasn't bad.

Okay it was odd.

Really weird.

When you got back you'd have to take a video to send to Logan.

But why could you see yourself?

You'd have to test it in front of a mirror.

The doors pulled open and you waddled down to your front door in no time, key in hand.

Unlocking the door, you pushed it and paused at the man standing inside. He was in your front room behind the sofa (more towards your kitchen) scanning the place.

Even from his side profile you knew it was Victor.

His head swivelled towards you and he gave you a smile, canines on full display.

“Victor.” Your eyes left him for barely a moment, frantically darting around to see where Logan was, before landing back on him.

Victor eyed you up and down. “You must be Y/N.” He had such an intimidating aura, it was unnatural.

“Where's Logan?”

“Preoccupied.”

What the fuck was that supposed to mean?

You didn't want to think the worst, however that's all your brain could do at the moment. Still though, you kept your chin up, not giving him the satisfaction of looking away again. Victor's hair was longer - facial hair included, he had a beard rather than the stubble you were used to - which made it look lighter. It was still brown and wasn't quite touching his shoulders but the soft locks made him look vastly different. He still had the edge to him but this made him… he seemed wilder? His clothes were plain: a black tee with tan pants and combat boots but he had paired them with a long tan fur trimmed coat.

“Why are you here?”

“Why not?” He smirked, nose twitching. “I see why he chose you.”

You didn't know what to do. Why was he being so unsettling?

The door to your room opened and Logan came out, despite his face being covered by a beard you could see it lit up when he saw you.

“Y/N, hey!” He grinned, making a beeline straight to you. “You've met Victor?”

Logan's arm wrapped itself around your waist as he glanced at his brother. “He's being fucking weird but yeah, we've met.”

“Vic, c’mon don't be an ass to my girl.”

Victor gave a shrug, stepping backwards and running his nails against your counter top. “Can’t help it. She's divine, a nice little catch.”

“Victor, I won't ask twice. Not in her home.”

The man in question rolled his eyes but put his hands up in surrender.

~~

“So he's staying for how long?” You questioned sitting on the lip of the bath whilst Logan carefully shaved his face.

“I don't know.” His eyes met yours in the mirror. “When I found him we got talking, I explained the situation and I wanted to ask him about our father, I- I just wanted to talk to him. When the illuminati assessed me they asked about relatives and despite it all I said Victor’s name. Got them to update me if they found him because I knew if he didn't want to be found he wouldn't be. That's why I had to leave, if I hadn't and he vanished again I'd have missed the chance.”

“So… how long's he staying?” You repeated with a playful smirk.

Logan rolled his eyes. “I know he can be a bit intimidating but if he's anything like my Victor it's all an act.”

“I've just never managed to get along with a Victor Creed.”

“He didn't have anywhere to go, was roaming about in the snow.” Logan let out a soft sigh. “We have these spare apartments here and… he's my brother.” You could see the conflict behind the decision. See how Logan was unsure of himself. “Wanted him to meet you. To meet Laura, too.”

Your heart lurched at the low confessions. He was such a girl dad you loved it. “She's been at the mansion a lot. I can call her, tell her to come back tomorrow or the next day, we could go out for a meal or a museum or bowling?”

Would bowling work with his nails?

Logan tried not to smile but it didn't work. “I'd like that.”

Your eyes left his, flittering down to your knees. You couldn't begrudge his decision, he wanted his brother to meet his partner and child. It was a decision made out of love as that just made your heart swell.

“How did you find the mansion?” Logan finished with his face, turning to lean against the sinks countertop. “I know we've spoken about it on text but it's not the same as talking.”

“Uh, yeah, the mansion was alright.” You clasped your hands. “The same as it ever was.”

Logan was waiting for more. “That's it?”

“Yeah. Not much more to say.” You shrug one shoulder.

He frowned. “What happened?”

“Nothing.” You told him honestly because technically nothing did happen at the mansion when you went. You were just preoccupied with memories and then left to see your parents but that was off Charles' property. “Just was a bit meh.”

Logan still waited for any elaboration. He wasn't a fool, he'd noticed the sag in your shoulders and the bags under your eyes. Your hair needed some love and your skin a shade paler. The telltale signs of ‘Y/N having nightmares’, he had seen them back in his universe and been able to soothe you so why would this be any different?

“Please talk to me.”

You opened your mouth, wanting to talk to him. Wanting to divulge what had happened these past few weeks but you didn't. You couldn't. “I will but not yet.” You outstretched your hand and he immediately accepted it. “I promise I'm okay and I will tell you.”

Logan hated that. Hated that you couldn't tell him this. Weren't you marri- no, you weren't. Why weren't you? You were married but he wasn't but you were married to him. But not to him.

He should remedy that.

“I must confess though,” your sweet voice cemented it. He had to. “I liked the beard.”

Logan's eyes crinkled and he held your cheek in one palm. “Thank you.”

"It grew so quickly."

"My hair does."

Your eyes shone under the fluorescent tube. “But this is you. This is Logan."

Logan considered his appearance - his ‘kitten ears’ and mutton chops - and wondered if he was born in this time would he look different? Most people eyed him with caution but not you. You gazed lovingly at him. “I've looked like this for about 200 years, no use in changing it now.”

You kissed his palm.

~~

Victor had also shaved his facial hair when you reconnected. He wore the same oversized sideburns as Logan and fuck me they looked similar.

You gave him an awkward smile from the kitchen as Logan set the table. The two of you had decided on enchiladas for dinner and had obviously invited Victor.

Logan had offered up Laura's original apartment to his brother seeing as she fully moved into yours when you fully moved into his.

Your phone buzzed on the countertop, Elektra's name lighting the screen.

Elektra: Who's the man Logan let into the 16? X

Y/N: His brother x

Y/N: Long story, I will inform you when I have all the details x

Elektra: he's cute x

Y/N: if you want to keep thinking like that don't talk to him x

Elektra: LOL

You placed your phone into your pocket and, bent to pull the food out of the oven, calling ‘dinners ready’ over your shoulder.

Logan gestured for Victor to sit at the table, unlike the other apartments this one was circular so there was no faffing about with who's sitting where.

Victor sat, giving you a wary glance as the food was placed in the centre. “Careful it's hot.”

He chuckled. “You don't have to worry about me.”

“Sorry.” Of course you didn't. “Force of habit.”

Logan ran a hand up your arm. “Don't worry, it's sweet.” And then sat in-between the two of you.

“Oh!” You remembered drinks. “You guys want a beer?”

The two nodded and said ‘thanks’ at the same time before eyeing each other.

This was so strange. You darted off to the fridge grabbing two beers and a can of 7up for yourself. Beer tasted too much like alcohol for your liking and you were afraid to have any flavoured gin or rum in case the sour mood you'd been living in for the past week made itself known.

Logan dished up an enchilada for Victor, then himself and just as you were sitting he placed one on your plate.

“Right, Victor, I hope you like it.” You wanted him before he took a bite. “I had to look in the fridge and just make it work.”

“I've lived through wars, I'm sure this is acceptable.” He gave you a wink except this time you didn't feel revulsion. He was making a joke and you imagined many missed them due to how dry his wit was.

“It'll be the best thing you've ever had.” Logan boasted. “Y/N pretends she isn't but she's the best chef I know.”

You roll your eyes. “It isn't hard to put some ingredients together. I'm not amazing but living in the Mansion made me cook.”

Victor took a bite and scanned you. “You lived in the X-Mansion?”

You nodded, mouth full of food. “Mhmm.”

“In your universe?”

Raising a hand in a ‘one sec' sign, you chewed faster. “Yes, I've actually met another version of you. Your hair is longer.”

“The version Logan met?”

Logan shook his head. “Nah, we're not from the same universe. In mine his hair is longer, eyebrows too.”

Victor's eyes squint as he gives the two of you a look of disbelief. “You are aware this sounds like a crock of shit.”

“You're a mutant living in a world where there's super soldiers and planetary travel but alternate universes are where you draw the line?”

Logan sniggered at your response, looking over to Victor. “In both our worlds being a mutant wasn't a good thing. I ain't saying this world is perfect. There's still racism and homophobia and all other sorts of hate but in ours we were the most targeted group.”

“People sold mutants in the streets in mine.” You shoved the memory out of your mind. “There was this country Magneto had - a safe haven - but even that wasn't completely safe from the humans.”

Victor considered the words, silently chewing his food. “What did we do about it then?”

Logan puffed air out of his mouth. “You and I fought in wars mostly, we, uh, we differed. You liked the fight too much. We met again later and were on opposite sides.”

He frowned. “So you were with the humans?”

“No. But I didn't want to kill them all or enslave them. You were part of a group that wanted that. Don't get me wrong, you were your own man but you did work with them.”

“I fought you.” You chimed in. “It wasn't easy. You're fucking strong.”

Victor smirked. “What is your ability?”

“Force fields.”

Logan scoffed. “It's more than that. She can bend them to her will, create shapes, fight with them.”

“Oh, yes and Lo' I've just discovered that I can do this.” You recalled, forming the newer field around yourself. “Apparently you can't see me but I can see me.”

Logan's eyes were massive, his fork landing on the plate below. “Y/N? W-thats a new power!”

You released yourself. “Yes, I was having a horsey dream-” translation: nightmare “-and I did this then I spoke about it at therapy because it feels different - it's like a warm blanket around my body - and Dave told me I was invisible.”

“That's- that's incredible.” Logan's grin was so wide you were worried it would hurt. His hand squeezed yours tightly.

“I bet it has something to do with Stark altering me. So, Tony Stark changed my DNA because I got stabbed a little bit and he was upset that Logan called him in the early hours.”

“A little bit stabbed?” Logan sassed.

“Laura didn't mean it.”

Victor just watched you both, appreciating the background knowledge but still fairly clueless.

“Victor, Laura is our daughter. She's from another universe. One where they cloned Logan. She has claws too.” You supplied, addressing Logan. “She did actually respond, Lo', should be here tomorrow in the afternoon.”

He wiped his mouth with a thumb. “That's good, been a while since I've seen the kid.”

After that there was a natural lull in the conversation, the only sound being cutlery and mouth sounds until you asked, “What about you Victor? Tell us about your life.”

The man's eyes enlarged and he scratched his chin.

“Uh, my father - Thomas - was a groundskeeper in the Northwest, he had an affair with his employer so life was good until it wasn't. And that was at the same time that my mutation began to reveal itself too so shit hit the fan for us. We survived, I lived a lot longer than him. I fought in the Civil war, World War I and II, Nam. Uhm, like in your experience, I was not well received back in the Northwest due to my mutation, so it's good to see the changes in how humans treat mutants.”

“Have you got any family? Friends?” You pushed.

“I keep in contact with some of the War buddies - Steve, James, Isaiah, Grimm, Rex and Frank but I’ve never felt the need to settle. Outlive them anyway.” The last sentence was said with such a final tone that you didn't want to pry any more.

After the meal had been eaten, you spent longer at the table merely chatting about anything and nothing. Victor told you as he rose with his plate that the meal was “tolerable” with another pointed wink.

~~

Logan's eyes hadn't left you since you began your nightly routine. He watched you from the lip of the bath, mirroring your own actions hours ago.

"I barely survived out there." He told you as you cleaned your face.

"No?" You quirked a brow.

"You were all I could think about." He confessed without a hint of embarrassment. "I hated being apart. I don't want to be apart again."

Your cheeks warmed. "We don't have to be."

"I know." He hopped up and wrapped you into a hug, watching you in the mirror. "You're beautiful."

"What do you want?" You chuckled, suspicions growing.

Logan kissed your shoulder. "You, always."

You watched, more than felt, as his right hand slowly made its way downwards.

It took little to no effort in slipping under the sleep shorts and caressing your pussy. Your breath stuttered as he cupped you but not wholly because of the action but because of the determination in his eyes.

He had missed you.

Logan's fingers played with you and you let your head fall backwards, leaning on him, moth agape.

"Look at yourself, look how fucking hot you are." He nipped your ear. "How long's it been since I smelt like you?"

He entered his middle finger, met with slight resistance. You hadn't had the energy to fool around so it had been a hot minute since anything was in you.

Logan pumped his hand, finger sliding deeper. You whimpered as he met knuckle.

You'd missed this.

Missed Logan making you cum and forgetting all else. When you were bouncing on his dick was when you were happiest.

He kept the slow rhythm, carefully introducing his ring finger, and you were more relaxed than you had been in a long while.

Logan watched the tension ebb from you. Noticed the weight leaving your shoulders as you melt into his chest.

Briefly the short speech of your pharmacist echoed in your mind, telling you that these pills come with side effects - one being that it may take a while to climax. But then Logan licked your neck and you were back here. Fuck that noise, this was real and this was happening.

"He's jealous." Logan whispered, the hand that was settled on your hip pinched your left nipple. "He could smell how sweet you were."

"Hmm?"

Logan bit down on your neck, biting and sucking the flesh, marking you to high heavens before the skin faded back to its natural colour. "Fuck Stark."

"Logan, everyone knows I'm yours." Your eyes felt heavy with how relaxed you had become.

"Need to show them." The rhythm picked up and he kneaded your breast.

You released a breathy noise in response.

"Wish I kept my dog tags." Logan was genuinely upset. "Kept thinking about you in nothing but them." His hips shifted against you and you arched your spine.

"You thought about me?" When had your eyes shut? Either way you opened them to watch Logan lost in your pleasure.

"Every damn minute." He answered. "Nothing different."

"I missed you." Your eyes fluttered closed as your mouth opened, a moan tumbling out.

Logan's chest vibrated with his groan. "I love you."

He cranked the dial up to 11 and pinched your clit with his left hand so you could only reply with a nod. Logan kissed your neck in apology for being harsh to her but he could never say he wouldn't do that again. Not after your aroused yelp.

With a hand in you, the other paying attention to your clit, his mouth leaving open kisses on your neck and his own growls you were a goner.

Pussy pulsing around his fingers as you fell into his back. Your orgasm taking it out of you.

Logan - with an arousing amount of ease - bent to pick you up and carry you over the threshold into your room.

@killerwendigo @littlecrowtime @geeksareunique @lovelyvaderx @br3nt-12 @st1nkabutt @maximumchilddreamland @catiwinky @ravenmedows @electricreader @vulgarfuckinvirgo77 @bisasterbisexual @tzurue @narniansmagic @seamlessepiphany @4ria790 @caramelatae @mei-simp @slightlymediocree @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @the-ruler-of-death

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I regret to inform everyone that Jackaby is just Timothee Chalamet

[xxplastic-cubexx]

chat if i may speak