#but i cheated and in general my color palettes are a little wacky so

[two-crows]

wanted to do something for pride even if its both a little shitty and a little silly

[myassbrokethefall]

xf sims nonsense

I keep meaning to post some pics of this baby computer game that I still play where I make pretend dollies of the people on TV so that I can make them kiss. It’s a very sophisticated adult hobby for cool people. So here goes. 

This is Sims 3, which I recently reinstalled and it immediately fucked the shit out of my computer, but what can you do. 

Here’s the hair I went with for Scully. There was another one I liked better from certain angles, but it sat weird on her head from other angles. This one had the best combo of being reasonably true to life (I decided to go for an S11 vibe), being attractive to my eyes in the Sim creator, and also not looking like a total trainwreck in the game. 

This is the closest I could get, from non-hideous stuff I have downloaded + color changes, to Scully’s maroon S11 outfit. Generally in The Sims you have to go for the SPIRIT of something because you’re not going to get it exact. 

Here’s her lil Scully suit. This is a download (the jacket at least) that I edited all the colors of and it’s not based on anything in particular, I just wanted to make a grey suit (the black parts are a separate editable slot but if I made them grey the buttons are also grey and I liked the contrast). 

I think I used to have a cross necklace, but I don’t seem to have it now, oh well. 

Nightie, the palette of which is vaguely based on the IWTB outfit THAT WE JUST FOUND OUT IS PROBABLY PAJAMAS, RETHINK RETHINK (not that I have any good button-down pajamas in Sims 3)

I think this is before I fixed his eyes (they’re way too light). His lips are also problematic, but, oh well. 

These are the only male pants (the shape, I mean) in this 10-year-old game that look ANYTHINGGGGGGGGG like the pants of today. And luckily someone did a nice retexture of them that I apparently once downloaded, so it doesn’t look like a cartoon cowboy like all the EA pants do.

The biggest issue with Mulder and Scully in Sims 3 is that they’re the same height. In Sims 2 there’s a cheat to make someone shorter, but it doesn’t work in 3. I’m always trying to make Mulder’s head bigger so he doesn’t look tiny next to Scully and her giant hair. 

Just trust me that this is the best hair I have for him. I’ve looked, a lot. This is actually a game-provided hair. The back looks pretty good at least. His eyes still look too tilty here, oh well. 

Gratuitous

WHO WOULD DO THIS WHATTTTT delete delete

I made the Unremarkable House in Sims 2 and then immediately abandoned it and installed Sims 3 instead. So I’ll have to remake it. This is just something I found in the game. I had to delete their garage (among other things) in order for them to be able to afford it. I modified some colors (which doesn’t cost anything) but mostly left it as is. 

Btw, I wanted Mulder and Scully to be Ghost Hunters...obviously. UNFORTUNATELY, the new Origin-hosted versions of Sims 3, which I am allowed to download and install for free because I already bought the discs and have the product codes still, are (drum roll) SUPER BUGGY, and the second and third expansion packs, when I installed them, just didn’t work at all. I googled around about this and they seem to just be permanently broken and, huge surprise, EA doesn’t seem interested in fixing them. But those two are (a) Late Night, which introduces city apartments, and (b) Ambitions, which has all the new(er) jobs INCLUDING GHOST HUNTER. So until that gets fixed, which is probably never, Mulder and Scully will be living in the suburbs being a police officer and a doctor instead of living in a snazzy city apartment being ghost hunters. Grumble. (Actually the house thing is OK because I want them to live in the UH anyway. But I would have started them out in a city apartment if I’d had the option.)

Luckily, World Adventures works, and my main goal for Mulder and Scully this time around is that they go to all the countries and go on a bazillion tomb-raiding quests. So that’s still a go. 

Here they are studying cooking (probably) on their ugly couch. (It was uglier before I recolored it.) Nerds. 

OBVIOUSLY Mulder was all over this gnome smuggling ring case. He took it down. That’s my boy. Nobody smuggles gnomes (or...is a smuggler that is also a gnome?) on Fox Mulder’s watch. 

Meanwhile, Scully is busy actually paying the bills

This is what the game provided as Mulder’s “career” outfit. Even more irreverent than a wacky tie!

This is a good example, actually, of the kind of robot logic you’re working with in this never-seeming-to-be-very-thoroughly-beta-tested game. There are separate (game-provided) outfits for all the careers. After Mulder and Scully got promoted once, they each had a normal career outfit. But for the first career level, the game seems to be set to use the “formal wear” outfit (I made suits for both Mulder and Scully, and set them as “formal”), but with one change. Scully had her suit but with slightly different shoes. And Mulder had his suit but with a bathing suit for pants. Sure. 

A little chess, to build up that logic skill (and after I fixed Mulder’s pants situation) (that’s what she said)

Scully is Neat so she’s always getting mad about how messy things are and cleaning them (she won’t use the toilet if it’s clogged), whereas Mulder just leaves his dishes out all the time and stuff. 

They don’t have a lot of money yet soooo they do the same activities a lot. Also, I don’t know if you knew but Scully is a medical doctor.

Almost, though not quite, as awkward as the IWTB kiss. 

We all know what the real point of The Sims is

aw yeah

That’s all for now. I haven’t actually played it in like three weeks because it’s such a hassle. Which, actually, is The Sims in a nutshell.