#but i am sharing it with you guys bc
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i have debated if i would share this or not for a while but i finally decided i will………..
this is my toko playlist it is So So Special to me actually. some of the song choices might seem random but they all have meaning to me in some way so!!! yeah enjoy
#squishy talks too much#pls do not bully my toko playlist#it is a sacred item to me#very very special#but i am sharing it with you guys bc#my moots are also special hehe#about tokos <3
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#enki ankarian#fear and hunger#cahara of the south#d’arce cataliss#ragnvaldr#funger#I feel like I’m spamming the Enki tag on tumblr and I feel bad LOL#sorrryyyyyyy am just autistic abt my wife#I’m not an artist by any means and I barely write anything worth sharing (but you best believe I write!!)#so instead I just silly mode this mf until I am blocked by 90% of tumblr for being too annoying#OHHH YEAH that’s what it is I’m scared that people will go thru the Enki tag to see something cool bc he is a rly neat guy#and instead they come across 70+ posts from tumblr user fearfulandhungry about Enki ripping my arms off and giggling#le sigh le sigh Le sigh
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so like... teeth... fangs, even.........
(silly) xtra under the cut
smfh tfw ur trying to joke but friend snitches you tf out
#utmv#cross!sans#killer!sans#self insert#mblue art#posting this on oreo's bday bc yes :)#10/10#happy birthday idiot what did you do to me /lh#you've stayed in my head for more than a year#made me feel so many feels#it is insane how many (AU) scenarios ive thought of with him guys#(but i will only share a couple to the public bc i am shy u_u;;)#(and they r very very self-indulgent;;)#(also HHEEELLLPPP KILLER IS SUCH AN ASS !!! (affectionate))#(you're lucky you're skrunkly meow meow status i made u look good in the first panel 😤😤😤)#CM
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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"And soda; runs off into the street..." "...and soda... is totally okay!"
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#cw blood#something something cracking open a boy w the cold ones#IF THERE ARE ANY MISTAKES I MISSED I SWWWEAR TO JEBEDIAH. IF I STARE AT THIS ANYMORE IM GONNA DIE IT NEEDS TO BE DONE#ALSO RRRAAAHAHHHGHGH CAN I JUST TAKEA SECOND TO SCREEAAMM ABT HOW MUCH I LOVE SODA AND EMIZEL.. LIKE THERYE SO CUTE....#THEY ARE HOMIES THAT KISS EACHOTHR GOODNIGHT. THEY CARE SO MUCH FOR EACHOTHER. SODA LOVES SODA AND SODA LOVES YOU#do u guys remember how willing he was to share blood w his vampire bestie. like cmon. remember when emizel memorized sodas Soda Schedule.#LIKE CMON.... they just have eachothers backs so much. ouhhh my god... ANYWAY SO THE ART HUH. I FEEL LIKE I SCRAMBLED W IT FOR A WHILE#DRAWIN IS HARD..... i think i did well in the end tho.. i like the lil heart beat effects. and i hope i made soda look Suffieciently Scared#i ALSO had fun w the teeth. i however did not have fun w the walls. if i had more drugs i mightve done every brick in more detail#but i didnt WANNA!!!! this will suffice.I HOPE IT FLOWS WELL&THAT ITS CLEAR... IVE STARED AT IT SO LONG IT IS NOW VISUAL SOUP. HELP!!!#i want my comics to have more Pauses and Space and Thought and Momence. i feel like normally they go so fast. but THIS time#i think i did good.... huuoouhhhh.... comics are HARD art is HARD but i am HARDER. or something. OH YEAH I HAVE MORE ART THINGS#soda was RLY HARD FOR ME TO DRAW FOR A MINUTE..but i like where his design is now. i wanted his hair to be curly swirly.like soda fizz#i THINK thats all my thoughts for now. if u have thoughts u should spill them in the tags i looooove reading tttaaggsss#have a goodnight i gotta go to work soon. maybe. unless the casinos power goes out AGAIN. OR SEOMTHING... UUGHHH MY SCHEDULE IS IN SHAMBLES#I THOUGHT I WAS WORKIN 3 DAYS INA ROW SO I RENTED A WHOLE DAMN HOTEL BC THE JOB PLACE IS FAR AWAY.. I HAD TO CANCEL THE WHOLE RESERVATOn#annd im MMMMAD ABOUT IT!!! like ill get over it ofc BUT IM PEEVED!!!! IM INCONVIENIENCED AND GENTLY AGGRIVATED. BUT OVERALL FINE.#hope yalls weekend goes well. sleep well. if u get the chance to.
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*looks at my most liked post* wow, you people *picks up my pen* what's wrong with you guys *turns on the tablet* such weird interests *starts drawing something similar* i mean, seriou-
#onceler#oncest#the onceler#lorax 2012#i cant believe im drawing oncest im the year of our lord 2024 the yr of our lord and here i am *breaks down into particulates*#god help me#and god help you too#got nervous to share this 4 some reason#made this bc u guys rlly liked the blushing onceler drawing
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played dragon age 2...just simple scribbles
#dragon age tag#i doubt that will see much use again..but who knows. vvv rambling below#weird game..the characters dialogue stuff and ending were good tho :')#i've played some of the first game but it kept crashing. i knew already despite knowing nothing that this guy was going to be my type#it doesnt feel right making video game art any more bc games like this end up feeling really personal - an experience that happened to me#if i design the main character a bit and fall in love then..that happened to me..i can't make Fan Art of that..only ive been through that..#like i cant make fanart of my dear companions in bg3 despite it having been a huge part of my heart in the last year#almost 1000 hours of playtime in something i can barely talk about bc it means too much.... lol#tons of ideas and conversations and extra thoughts and scenes and emotions about all the incredible times i've been through in bg3#and the maelstrom just rotates around intensely in my own heart forever...but that's ok too...that is so precious to me#but fortunately i already knew people that have played this game and talked/drew abt it recently so it was saved from that for me#sharing scribbly fanart on my Blog is a way to capture the feeling just after experiencing something so it has good points#witch hat atelier escapes that by not being a GAME. games are so immersive. but my wha art & feelings are incredibly immersive too#which makes it difficult sometimes now. i live a complicated and emotional life <3 i am not suited to fandom <3#my character ended up looking so much like oru without me realising that's what i was doing. Kind bearded fireball throwing gay mage. Hmm.#falling for a sad white hair memory trauma fellow that keeps you at a tragic distance. Hmmmmmm.#i see also how very much bg3 is inspired by stuff like dragon age now lol so i'm glad i experienced it. I WANT MY KIRKWALL LIFE BACK...#so dated though as well and unpleasant at times (the city and the dismal atmosphere was depressing.) i hate violence/horror..#bg3 is SOOOO very dismal but it feels like I am killing people and going through horrors because i have to survive i have to be free#Well anyway. ahh it's so refreshing to fall in love. my gay journey continues...
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If I told you guys I’ve never 3D modelled before would you believe me
#seeing how strong willed I am#bc I want to make a minecraft mod so bad#red draws#technically#its still art#god give me strength#I have no idea how to animate#i’ll get there one day#minecraft#minecraft mod#mineblr#if you guys have any tips don’t be afraid to share…#blockbench
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I’m researching all the animals wolverine gets compared to so I can see which ones are most like him and to which degree they are like him.
Bro this shit is fueling headcanons…
His love language is definitely gift giving, but he wouldn’t usually say the gift is from him. It would just appear at the person’s place. Like randomly, his friends get random tiny things, and they have no fucking clue where they come from??? And things they thought they lost appear again?? They must just think they are lucky at first.
#he shares most characteristics of a wolverine#most#at least the way I interpret him#bc I don’t think he is actually a loner (like a wolverine)#but rather a pack animal kinda guy (like a wolf)#otherwise he is basically just a wolverine which actually just makes me love him more#and just fuelsssss headcanons#however their are some characteristics of him that I haven’t found yet#what fucking animal gets caught up in killing that they accidentally kill more than just the people attacking them?#(besides a human)#bc it ain’t a wolverine#they seem more deliberate with their ACTS of aggression#again#acts bc they are scavengers and don’t actually kill much#they mainly just terrify other animals… they are still dangerous tho#very territorial little guys#I actually am pretty sure his berserk mode might just be an animal stereotype#just like how him being an alpha of that pack of wolves was a stereotype#(ig not all of his mutations are ‘“animal like’’. some may just be exaggerated human faults)#also did you know that Wolverines are actually the BIGGEST of their family?#ah so cute… many are weasels fucking dangerous thank god they are only 6 ounces#unfortunately I can’t say the same about wolverines#I actually am having so much fun researching these animals can you tell?#wolverine#wolverine comics#headcanon#wolverine headcanon#x men
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im adding a new thing to my new carrd im making and i know not everyone reads it when following me so im just gonna post this here in advance before I finish the carrd 😭😭😭
#I love sharing my f/os and you can think the guys I like are attractive all you want!!!#but I just don’t like treated like im a blank character where other people can insert themselves in place of me 😭😭😭#like . it’s just very much me….. yknow … like thats now I portray myself 😭😭😭#my sonas aren’t really separated from me. they’re indeed me 😭😭😭#i had art I’ve drawn of my sona blow up and people going me coded!!! Or misgendering me bc they don’t think it’s me 😭😭#like no that’s me . hope that helps 😭#I’m also gonna add a couple characters I am uncomfortable with people shipping with to my cards bc um…. side eyes… uhhh#like there’s a handful of characters im gonna look at you a bit weird over#but trust me almost all of people I interact with are all good I promise 🫶🏽#txt
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#not to be a broken lil man on main#but I was on the phone with my dad for 30 minutes just now (that's a lot for a phone call with him) and like.... damn. yeah. i do have one#parent who's not horrible huh#we talked a lot about my plans for the future...... which I only now told him bcs scary and bcs........ I never ever during my 25 years of#being alive got the impression from my parents that something like this would be an acceptable career choice or something they'd support#and I mean. my [redacted] of a mother is the best example for how. not alright it is with her that I'm doing something that's not very...#traditional for this family#but anyways. my dad was absolutely fucking lovely#to the point that I get getting teary eyed and felt my throat closing up cause. huh. i guess in his own way he does love me and believe in#he asked me to send him a link or a pdf of my first conference report because he wants to keep it somewhere 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I'm....... ouch. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch#you know the ghosting I am really good at with tumblr chats (sorry guys. ilu. I just suck at communication)???? i'm also extremely good at#that with whatsapp chats and just. not calling my irl loved ones#so idk. hearing him say he understands and just wanted to make sure I wasn't upset with him and like. wanted to know if I was doing okay.#damn. okay. damn#idk#this was such a good talk and he was so suppertive and non-judgemental and I actually told him about my birthday and how my mother's call#upset me and he was like. yeah. same. and like... he's basically gone no contact with her as well as it turns out#idk. I really should give him more credit and like... I feel like there's so much shifting and change and development happening while I'm n#not there and sometimes it's hard to remember that he actually /could/ understand some things. just cause I've always been so used to not#sharing anything about myself because it wasn't safe when I was younger and... idk........ lots of emotions going on rn#so glad we talked though. so glad#simon.out.#if you read all this.... idk man.... sorry for oversharing but thanks for caring ig <3
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craving validation from exactly the wrong person. slay
#bpd#actually bpd#bpd thoughts#bpd feels#bpd vent#bpd mood#girl you can't just do this every time you want to talk to someone and they don't read your mind and text you#how to explain to people that i am not just insane in love relationships i'm insane about everyone i know and they are not an exception#baby i have wild and insane platonic abandonment issues too (friends with that guy again but we will absolutely never be as close as before)#codependent best friendship where other person gets pissy and decides not to be my friend all the time#losing my best friend over and over#sometiems bc i was being a bitch but sometimes bc i shared too much about my mental health or said the wrong thing#never knowing what the emotional support threshold is or what the new wrong thing could be#and i was insane and way too attached like codependence has such a nasty side when it's not mutual anymore#and i'm WORKING ON SHIT and taking my favorite people off their pedestals and blah blah blah#anyway guess that still has me fucked up
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#me and my friend are noticing a strange thing where aether keeps it mid but everywhere else we've tried so far takes it north#so we are now curious#im expecting less jp/oce replies since tumblr is mostly NA and EU players from what ive seen and the poll was already big so you guys share#dynamis isnt here bc it's still baby and queues are garbage on it#i am a small blog so reblogs to get more results are appriciated#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv
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originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins
#origins smp#i heard theres been like three failed origins revivals WHAT EVEN HAPPENED i was only there for the first one😅#beeduo#otubbo#oranboo#beeduo fanart#i rewatched some origins streams a little while ago oh my god theyre SO FUNNY#DUDE DOES ANUONE REMMEBER THAT ONE STREAM I COUDLNT FIND RHIS ONE STREAM#IR WAS LIKE THE ONE WHERE TUBBO WAS SINGING SUGAR BY MAROON FIVE and they were being really Funny thay shit h#ad me CRYING in 2021 Please i swear this happened imnot crazy but also they might have been separate streams actuallu i dont rememebr its#been wayyyyyyy too long#BUT IT HAPPENED I PROMISE Sorry i've been gone for a while ive been very busy lots of Things going on went to Six flags then jad a surprise#bday party then i had to buy shoes for prom then Go to prom and also i do figure skating and am out like every day idknt have Time im sorry☹#had a crepe yesterday it was sooooo goood im like learning to drive too that shit is boring as hell my dad kept gettign 😑 bc i couldn't stop#yawning DRIVING IS SO BORING its not my fault😭😭😭😭#ok what else ohhhh. y god i locked in SO HARD for this physics essay u guys dont even knowim getting ONE HUNDRED on that trust i just really#wanted to share ok i love you bge#WAIT ACTUALLT SORRU IM LIKE REMMEBERJNG THE ORIGINS STREAMS K WAYCHED#RANBOO WAS SO FUCKING FUNNT IN THOSE STREAMS TOO LIKE I REMEMBER NIKI WANTED TO SEE THEIR BASE and tubbo was like ooh maybe we can put like#water down here for you niki we need a water system and ranwas like Do we though?I WAD WAYCHING THAT .LIKE DAMMMNNNNNN OM LIKE GIGGLING WRIT#ING THIS RIGHT NOW I CAN HEARTHE CLIP HE DID NOTTT WANT HER IJNTHEIR BASE😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#I NEED TO FIDN THAT STREAM WHERE IRS LIKE TOMMY AND JACK A D FHEHRE LOKE TALKING ABOUT DUOS AND THEN JACK SAYS THE MOST OUT OF POCKET SHIT I#VE EVER HEARD LKKE I LITERALLU HAD TK PAUSE. H PHONE AND BURST OUR LAUHJIMG MY JAW WAS ON THE FLOORRRRR DO U GUYS R EME ER WTF IM TLAKING AB#OUT IDK HOW TO FIND THESE STREAMS Oh my god u really Had to be there early 2021 that was liye the funniest era of mt life i wlild be#Tearing up from lauhjimg every day I MISS WAYCHING STREAMS LIVE CHAT WAS SO FUNNY I wishe it was archivedI WISH MORE STREAMERS KEPT CHAT ON#SCREEN i defiently understand why most didn't like Wyd when chats annouing ad hell but also Me 3 years later is interested in what the pub#lic had to say.... ok Now bye
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I made this like a month ago I never posted it on my socials bc i thought the anatomy felt a little wonky to me when i doodled it but. Someone has to add fuel to the kenji/makoto fire,,,,
#robin draws things#robin kenji posting#persona 3#kenji tomochika#makoto yuki#minato arisato#guys i am so normal about them.#wtf is their ship name even#like. i can't call it kenmako or kenmina.#bc then someone might think im refering to ken and not kenji#and I'd. rather not you know???#anyways i wasn't very fond of this doodle for anatomy reasons but i thought id share anyways#im still learning ;~;#and why yes that is the choker kenji made p3-kun is wearing :)
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throwing out just One more hot dean and jack take while it’s on my brain but I honestly think dean gives jack a little more autonomy than sam and cas do . Maybe.
#heavy on cas bc I feel he’s a bit more … coddling? ? than Sam is ?#sam just kind of leaves jack to himself and vaguely offers support or advice#but Dean is the only one we’ve seen on screen that has a MUTUAL connection w jack#like their entire start and end conversations in Optimism abt needing to stay busy & blaming themselves#they GET each other#cas is just. idk#the argument he had with jack in 14x0…2 I believe ..#like jack is just CONSTANTLY trying to get ppl to understand that he makes his own choices and can handle himself#I cannot stress enough that he hates being treated like a helpless child.#there’s so much situational irony with that lmaooo#anyways#this is like half thought out I fear#I miss my guys#cal.txt#spn#supernatural#jack kline#dean winchester#dean and jack#tfw2.0#sam winchester#sam and jack#cas#cas and jack#like I do love Sam and cas as dads they’re all his dads . dean is just my favorite im sorry#if I said people don’t like dean as a dad that much bc he doesn’t infantilize jack …… would you brain me with a rock ….. be honest#liek … Idk#I am noticing patterns and I do not like them or the common theme they share#goodnight gang
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