#but i am managing it way way better
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Dermatologist confirmed that I've been treating my skin right but gave me a prescription for suttin I can use daily for my face anyway
Used it last night and woke up looking a lot better (tbh I usually do anyway) - I did notice a difference
And my skin has been in a pretty decent state of repair. I've been going without makeup without feeling self conscious
Today, other discomforts had me picking at my dang face again and, whilst I haven't fucked it up completely, I've def done more damage 🙃
So now it really is just a battle between me and my damn obsessive compulsions
Trying to actually curb it completely so that I can get this damn facial in a few weeks and enter 30 with clear skin and glowing
By will or by force ima make it happen
Even if it means keeping my nails cut as short as possible and avoiding looking in mirrors
I'm trying not to fuck it up so that when I'm 30 I can fuck it uppppp
Yagetme
#mine#skin#dermatillomania#i dont really see people talk about it but its real#and horrible#esp like...#my face looks like trash so often and i know its my fault#and i WISH it was as easy as deciding not to do it COZ LET ME TELL YOU#ya gurl has bawled her eyes out begging herself to stop and still been their destroying her face#but i am managing it way way better#no more two hour sessions in front of the mirror and walking away with my entire face wrecked#more often than not i can be proud of my efforts these days#just gotta keep going#and keep reminding myself that it is a form of self harm coz that makes it a lot easier for me to talk myself out of getting carried away#i will be fresh faced soon#i put thay on everything#i used to be like porcelain#this aint how im doing adulthood
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me stubbornly forcing myself to drink green tea and rest from my THIRD COLD THIS MONTH
#i am so fucking tired of being ill#is it not enough that i have a chronic illness and chronic pain condition all the time anyway???#ughhh#i'm grateful because i at least managed to get to (most) of the gigs i wanted to this month#but other than that i've literally just been stuck in bed unable to do anything and my brain is starting to melt with boredom#idk how i can still not be well enough to write or absorb myself in reading a good book or fanfic or even be on here properly#but my brain feels like MUSH and it's so frustrating#i miss my little four walls men so much 😩#i miss being able to see the sky and see my friends and taste the food i eat#sorry i know i'm complaining#i just needed to vent for a moment#it's been such a shit few months anyway and i was already in a really rough spot with my mental/physical health for a number of reasons#so this just feels like the last straw#universe please let me feel a little better soon#i have things i want to do and people i want to talk to and fics i want to write#oh how nice it must be to live in a body that isn't constantly impaired in some way 🤦♀️#lulu posts
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the deer prince and the golden doe
from chapter 34 of Salt00's fic Chick Magnet
please click for HD tumblr is killing this one
#what's up nerds#fire emblem three houses#claude von riegan#fe3h#chick magnet took over my life for like 2 months#i've never managed to get through any fic over 150000 words before but uh..... here i am#i'm on chapter 79#its like really damn good#i haven't even played the golden deer route yet but i would die for all of them#i feel like the shading on this one is way better than what i did for Dogs of Heaven#i'm getting better! i need to learn how to not do soft shading tho jeez#on the plus now i know how to make glowing molten gold which is the best part of the whole picture tbh#the working title was 'dear deer prince' which is very fun to say#i am going to TRY 52 pieces 52 weeks again but i'll see what happens#but this is week one! and pic one#all my rat
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Won't You Shake A Poor Sinner's Hand?
I imagine Reigen and Serizawa were going for a lovely early morning stroll through London and on their way home Reigen offered they try taking a shortcut through a very suspicious foreboding looking alleyway and ended up running into this equally suspicious foreboding looking man, Dimple, who greeted them like the Shadow Man from Princess and The Frog and sang Friends From the Other Side -- or maybe he tried selling them sketchy multi-purpose tonics or used watches or whatever -- Anyway, Reigen's frantic rambling is not helping the situation AT ALL and Serizawa is just standing there nervously, eyes wildy darting back and forth between Reigen and Dimple until he starts silently and anxiously eyeing Reigen and shaking his head hoping Reigen would stop digging his own grave by interacting with this mysterious (and possibly dangerous?) man and, for the love of Mob, just get the heck outta of there lol
Dimple Friday #19
#man I'm fucking beat!!#i spent way too long on this however by the end i only managed to make it a sketchy piece#i just didn't have enough time to do full clean lineart 😔#also I was so tired and burntout i dont think i could've if i tried#jsyk i really put all my effort into this piece and I'm glad i can tell it's definitely a huge improvement in my art#like compared to my other yoshiokas and just other art in general it's improved#even tho it's still a sketchy piece i'm getting better woohoo 🥳 I'm so proud of myself and am really grateful i started doing dimple friday#yes reigen and uu-chan have matching hats because i said so#dimple friday#mob psycho 100#mp100#mob psycho#mob psycho 100 fanart#mp100 fanart#ekubo#dimple#mp100 ekubo#ekubo mp100#mp100 dimple#dimple mp100#serizawa katsuya#reigen arataka#yoshioka dimple#yoshioka mamoru#human dimple#my art#serirei#ekuserirei
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was writing this down for an ask but realized i was quickly getting off topic for that ask lmao. let’s talk about Dean’s handprint, the wild misinterpretations of it, and how those have affected how people read Anna covering it during her sex scene with Dean.
We have to establish the obvious first: the number one way the handprint is misinterpreted is to establish a romantic connection between Dean and Castiel from their very first meeting. Because of how popular the ship is, we’re now left with the unfortunate aftermath of people knowing the ship first and the show second, and therefore being more inclined to interpret the show through the lens of the ship. Needless to say, while looking at season 4 through that lens for hints of destiel is fun, it doesn’t lead to a thematically cohesive reading. The handprint is the best way we can demonstrate this. If we take the handprint to indicate that Castiel has been romantically interested in Dean since minute one, or even that he sees Dean as a person rather than an instrument of Heaven’s will at first (put a pin in that), then the rest of his character arc for the season is incoherent and meaningless. To assert that this is what the handprint is about takes the conclusion Castiel needs the entirety of season 4 to reach and transplants it onto him at the very beginning in order to make it easier to find evidence for the ship.
There’s a lot of media out there where interpreting it through the lens of a ship, even one unintended by the author, can enhance the original text. (Lest we all forget our Winter Soldier roots.) Supernatural does not have that relationship to interpreting it to be about destiel. A season 4 where the handprint means Castiel is in love with Dean is a weaker story and does a huge disservice to Castiel’s actual character arc.
So, now that we’ve established what the handprint isn’t, can we talk about what it is? Yes. It’s pretty simple, actually.
Think of it this way: To Heaven, Dean is livestock, and the handprint is the brand telling everyone (but especially Dean) what ranch he belongs to.
Let’s start with the obvious: it isn’t a metaphorical brand at all. It’s literal. It’s burned into his skin permanently (or at least, when the makeup department wants to put it there.) I’d argue that from the nature of it being notable as the only scar Dean has from being raised from Hell and later showing up during his sex scene with Anna that even if we don’t see the handprint, we’re meant to interpret it as continuing to be there for… well. The rest of his life, most likely. And that’s horrifying. The handprint is telling us two things when it shows up: one, letting us know that Dean’s resurrection was intentional and through a manner we as the audience don’t have the information to guess at yet. Anyone who watched the show airing, or watches it now without knowing about angels would have assumed demonic deal intervention as being the cause of Dean’s new lease on life, and this. handily. discards that theory. But secondly, it tells us that this resurrection was violating. All resurrections on Supernatural are.
We assume from Castiel’s line, you know the one, we all know the one, Mr. Gripped-You-Tight, that he’s the one who put it there. However, to then make a further leap that it was Castiel’s personal decision to do so is, I think, a misunderstanding of his role. Take that pin out now. Dean is not a person to Castiel at this point. They’re not friends. Dean is a tool for Heaven to use, a tool that should be honored and grateful to be picked up at all. Make no mistake: Castiel branded him for Heaven, not for himself. Castiel’s a ranchhand. They aren’t in the business of letting the cows run free if they look a little sad to be slaughtered later.
Castiel needs to start here for his arc to be as impactful as it is. He can’t begin rebellious. He has to learn how to doubt. He has to develop a personal friendship with Dean that threatens his allegiance to Heaven. He has to see Anna having chosen to fall rather than obey Heaven and to be betrayed by Uriel being so desperate that he’s turned to killing their brothers and sisters trying to find a way out from under Heaven’s control.
There’s another line I think gets misinterpreted a lot in this initial meeting. “You don’t think you deserve to be saved?” On its face, easy bait for someone looking for shipping fodder, but that misses the actual point of the line. It’s a powerplay. We don’t learn until later why Dean wouldn’t think he deserves to be saved (aside from his general Winchester levels of self-esteem, but knowing that trait about him actually serves as a pretty good red herring to mask real reason Dean is thinking about himself as irredeemable now until the reveal. It’s not that Dean had a low opinion about himself in general, but that he tortured people in Hell and can never forgive himself for that.) , but Castiel does know. All of Heaven knows what Dean’s sin in Hell was. Without saying it, Castiel can remind Dean of it here. This line isn’t about Dean being so inherently good that Castiel had to rescue him. It’s about making sure Dean knows that the only way he can be ‘redeemed’ is through obedience to the heavenly powers who own his ass now. This is how he deserves to be saved. Because God commanded it. Because they have work for him.
And if he doesn’t bow? Then, as Castiel puts it in the very next episode, “I dragged you out of Hell. I can throw you back in.” This threat hanging over Dean’s head won’t go away for the rest of the season, not from Heaven. The only shift is that Castiel’s continued doubt and disobedience levels the playing field between them. They’ll both be punished, rather than Castiel taking on the role of disciplinarian. (It’s a really clever way of dealing with that power gap between them, actually. There’s always a bigger fish.)
The handprint and Castiel’s early conversations with Dean serve as a reminder of the precarious position he’s in. We shouldn’t take him ‘being saved’ at face value, no more than we should take Heaven being good just because they’re the angels in this equation as a given. Dean hasn’t been saved. He’s being used, just as much (if not arguably more) than Ruby is using Sam. (Because at least Ruby truly believes this is for Sam’s benefit, in the end.) And the worst part is how aware of it Dean is. How could he not be? His entire stint in Hell is defined by how Alistair used him. He’s just been handed off to a different owner, one that will still happily push him into the thing they ‘saved’ him from the minute it proves useful. Dean needing to torture Alistair reminds us just how little his circumstances have actually changed. He’s not allowed to say no to this.
So. The handprint is Heaven’s mark of ownership. It’s Dean’s status as their tool, their victim, burned into his flesh and inescapable. What does it mean when Anna places her hand over it?
I’ll lay my cards on the table. I’ve been thinking about this for so long because the aforementioned tendency to assume that the handprint is evidence for destiel means that the scene between Anna & Dean also gets lumped into being interpreted as more evidence for destiel. For over a decade, I have endured people joking about Anna being jealous of Cas for getting to leave a mark on their boytoy. And that’s one of the nicer things the Supernatural fandom will say about a woman who they perceive as a threat to their ship.
So, not to be rude or anything, but fuck Castiel. This ain’t about him.
This scene—It’s a lovely scene, a fantastic continuation of Dean and Anna’s previous conversation into the language of a sex scene—is about two people who have both been used and threatened by Heaven connecting over that shared trauma. Before, Anna gives space for Dean to open up about Hell, but he can’t, not yet, and though she knows what he’s gone through, she hasn’t been there herself. But when it comes to what Heaven has made of them, she does understand. It’s an incredibly vulnerable moment.
You make the handprint about Dean and Cas, and you erase what that scene is about entirely: the way Heaven’s abuse has tangled itself deep into Dean and Anna’s lives, into their bodies, and how they can resist it, if only for a few moments together.
The handprint was never about Castiel at all. It was about Heaven and its dehumanization of Dean.
#not to be annoying or anything on this wednesday morning#but uh. handprint meta.#everyone else is wrong about the handprint and what it means. except for me <3 im special and the Understander of Soup Or Natural#spn#dean winchester#anna milton#castiel spn#annadean#i really did try to keep the frustration in this to a minimum and just discuss what the handprint is#eh. arguable how well i managed that. but i think i can be forgiven after dealing with over a decade of Incorrect Handprint Takes#and im allowed to be salty down here in the tags :3 hi. hi. if you think anna touches the handprint out of jealousy you are bad at watching#shows and bad at media analysis and i hate you. personally.#god no but seriously it flattens the three of them so much to say the handprint is about cas loving dean. it really does#its a disservice to castiel’s gradual rebellion. its a disservice to dean’s struggle in s4 of transitioning from an openly abusive dynamic#in hell to one that’s trying to gaslight him into believing he’s better off under heaven’s control. its a disservice to anna and her own#trauma with heaven and the way she connects to dean through it.#number one dean/anna enjoyer and i am SICK of it. justice for the handprint scene
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Hello! I'm someone who really enjoys makeup, but has recently in the past few years begun to view makeup and the makeup industry more broadly as something that is really detrimental to women. You seem to be in somewhat of the same position, and I admire your thoughts, so I was curious how you reconcile those positions or if you feel the need to reconcile them at all? Please ignore this ask if it's intrusive or weird lol
You can't reconcile them. You really can't. The beauty industry exists to churn out propaganda, inventing flaws and offering us fixes for a price, before moving on to the new (usually opposite, so you don't already have the tools) trend.
I'm in my thirties, I've seen the beauty industry turn into a nightmarish hydra that I never could have imagined as a teenager. The speed with which people create and zero in on new physical nitpicks, the ubiquity of filters and plastic surgery, that skincare (literally unless you have a specific ailment, a soft cleanser and nothing else will do you just fine) has become a lunatic self-flagellation in the name of some kind of nebulous Purity, just the endless chasing and chasing and chasing of that new thing that new miracle bottle, whatever will finally make you less disgusting for living in a human body. It's rancid. But it’s always been like this. Just slower.
And it's important to be intellectually honest about all this. The reason we think we look better with our lips a certain color, or our skin being a certain texture is because beauty culture has spent hundreds of years and trillions of dollars rotting our brains. None of this is real. You know that you find the people you love the most attractive when they're comfortable and bare faced and being themselves. Contour would change literally nothing about your feelings in that moment.
I enjoy makeup. I like gold eyeliner and deep berry lipsticks and a stain of blush. Why? Because I also have brain rot, and think I look Better with it on. You can't dismantle the entire wretched apparatus on your own, but you can be clear with yourself about why you believe what you believe. As my wife pointed out when I talked to her about this ask, even saying "I just like to decorate my face" doesn't hold water. You don't know what you natively like to do with your face, when it comes to beauty. You've spent your whole life marinating in propaganda. It gets into everything.
Due to my Ancient Years, I am no longer expected to be Young And Hot, which means I don't put on makeup on to run errands, and I don't feel like a full face is necessary to see friends or get dinner on a weeknight. I've started trying to treat makeup like I'd treat a pair of high heels: sometimes it's nice to feel dressed up, and in some environments heels are part of the dress code. Sometimes you wear heels to show your partner that you put in extra effort for them, or to make sure someone knows you took an occasion seriously.
Tellingly, heels also exist to fix a "failure" in your appearance.
It's like finding smoking sexy. Smoking kills you, unambiguously. And yet....it's hard not to feel like you'd be cooler if you had a cigarette in your hand. No one is immune to the manipulations of propaganda. But it is propaganda, plain and simple, and we shouldn't twist ourselves in knots to defend the lies it tells us, or try to make them ~praxis~. Beauty culture is exactly the same.
#yikes scoob!#it's rotten all the way down#(speaking of heels nothing makes me roll my eyes more than watching a movie where A Woman In Heels Does The Thing Like The Men)#(like oo wow she managed to be useful without losing her desirability!! yas queen)#and I wear heels!#I own many lipsticks!#I am not better than you#but you HAVE to be honest#you can't pretend there's a tension between good makeup (for me!) and bad beauty culture (for Others)#it's all for others#and surprise others is capitalism and the politics of desirability#makeup games#(lol I made that tag back when I was pretending at the aforementioned tension)
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I've been trying to make a post about the OMITB finale but I'm just. Overwhelmed. It was too good. I was in tears as soon as the episode started and I kept tearing up all the way through. I suppose it starts with finding your hero. I can't do it, Sazz. Oh, I can't do it by myself / That's why I'm here. Sazz was kind to everyone. He's gonna get you, my... number... one. You know, I appreciate this movie in a whole different way now; I mean, Sazz wrote this. It's just so, so special to have an amazing show like this that's centered on platonic bonds and the love between friends. I loved the wedding, of course, but the true relationship at the core of this show is the one between the trio, and the true relationship at the core of this season was the one between Charles and Sazz, and the way they went about it was everything to me.
I love you, OMITB. You're the most wonderful funky little comfort show ever. Never change.
#god. damn it.#HOW do they do it folks. how??? every season is better than the last this is genuinely such a gift of a show#sazz... oh my god sazz... she found her hero in charles... she wanted to write *his* story because she loved and admired him so much#IM GOING TO BE SICK (/pos)#and the complete *trust*. the way she just knew charles would solve her murder. i'll cry again oh my god i love this show so much#charles and oliver went UP ON A LEDGE A FUCKTON OF FEET IN THE AIR to save mabel OH MY GOD#i just. i just. i can't articulate just how much this show means to be this was so beautiful#i loved the wedding ofc!!! and im really sad to see loretta leave! but i hope we'll still manage to see her at least once next season#also im caling it now. the dame at the end is the murderer in s5#i know because i was instantly attracted to her. and that's how i knew who the killers were in s1 and s3#(do not ask me about the victim DO NOT ask me about the victim i am NOT ready to deal with it oh my GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!)#we're in for a spetacular s5 folks! and i already can't wait!#but in the meantime... AMAZING INCREDIBLE s4 im so grateful it was such a magical experience#everybody say thank you omitb!!!#omitb#omitb spoilers#omitb s4
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Frye Fest - Final Countdown
<- Previous - Part 13 - Next ->
[13/20]
🪐🍮Team Saturday/Custard (JP)🍮🪐
Splatfest 17-02-2024
[Master Post - coming soon]
#i never make things easy for myself. do i?#thankfully i have my sister to help me with the poses or else I'd be going crazy XD#she helped me find a way to merge it much better than i had planned XD#also man i was sad to erase her perfectly good body#but i think i managed to (mostly) preserve it XD#splatoon#splatoon 3#splatfest#frye fest#frye onaga#team Saturday#friday vs saturday vs sunday#team custard#red bean paste vs custard vs whipped cream#チーム カスタード#あんこ vs カスタード vs ホイップ#i am actually crossing my fingers im typing this right#im copy pasting directly from the wiki fjsjajja#saltys art#my art
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Honestly, your comics about the Emperor have really helped me parse my own complicated feelings about him. Because like, it's not as if I didn't want to trust him and find that good in him. There were times when I felt like I could see it. But as I played more, I just felt like that trust wasn't truly reciprocated.
Anyway, apologies for the rambling. Your art and comics are awesome, and Greygold is great.
I've been trying to think how to respond to this because I can RELATE but in a - beyond constructively sophisticated sounding words- way huar.
Because without -ANY- kind of hindsight, Zip Zilch NADA, this game is really REALLY good (OH SO GOOD) at portraying the Emperor as a very complicated and extremely-hard-to-trust character.
You are absolutely valid in feeling conflicted and confused with all the uncertain-in-between inner conflicts for this dingus of a squid.
Unlike Greygold, I, too, was absolutely struggling to find some form of strong evidence, validation, reassurance, SOMETHING FOOL-PROOF, to fully trust this illithid during the entire playthrough.
If it weren't for the bloodhound hunting need to find all that is lore in this game, BOY WOULD IT HAVE ALMOST BEEN NEAR IMPOSSIBLE TO TRUST THIS SQUID AT ALL for me. Those lil sneaky paper trail crumbs of 'emps just doing it's best' are what gave me enough hope to trust in spite of the overwhelming counter-lore, doubts, and Emps' terrible tact continuously just NOT HELPING IT'S CASE.
but Trust. Trust is, I suppose, the key theme for this squid. Classic 'ultimately down to your core values on what you would do with the most trust-issue-y morally grey squid to ever squid this damn squid game'.
Or as friggin' Withers likes to say: What is the value of one life to you? (friggin' Withers, man)
#BUT AYE YOU'RE VALID AND RAMBLINGS ARE APPRECIATED AND ENJOYED AND I AM ALWAYS HUMBLED TO BE GIVEN THE CHANCE TO LISTEN TO THEM#I JUST WISH I COULD GIVE BETTER SOUNDING WISDOM OR VALIDATION BACK AHA#ANYWAY I'm glad you like the comics and greygold and I wish you best of luck with the squid-dingus YOU ARE TOO KIND#There truly was no easy obvious comforting answer to know if the emperor was chill or not.#sometimes forging friendships takes more than managing approval and disapproval#Sometimes you're gonna have to stubbornly fight tooth and nail and flip every last furniture to fortify that friendship#SOMETIMES YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO BUILD THE ENTIRE BRIDGE YOURSELF INSTEAD OF MEETING HALF WAY WITH SOME DINGUS FRIENDSHIPS#IF YOU REALLY BELIEVE THEY'RE WORTH IT
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my hot take of the day is that clearly the people who swallow the in universe targ & valyrian exceptionalism are being completely taken in by the exact system that george is trying to critique but also i think the people who over correct into this idea that not a single targaryen is worthy of like, our empathy or sorrow or are rightfully chafing against the structures put in place by valyrians, first men, and andals alike are also being incredibly 2d in their analysis. i feel like this happens most often when people try to make the case that andals are somehow oppressed in westerosi society on a cultural level simply bc valyrian supremacy trumps andal culture. i think this is incredibly silly to say or posit as the truth in universe because there is in fact some oppression of culture in westeros but it’s not the andals lol!!! it’s the first men, the dornish, the rhoynar/greenblood orphans, and the ironborn. there Is some level of,,,, idk bigotry/xenophobia towards valyrians but only valyrians who don’t worship the faith - people like larra rogare, who still follow valyrian gods, do face this bigotry because they’re Too Foreign, the same way someone like thoros, melisandre, taena, etc who are essosi but not from a still heavy valyrian-based society like volantis and lys, and that’s definitely important to the conversation, because it shows the Dominant Culture is in fact the Andal culture when it comes to westeros and that’s like,,, fine, and even more interesting to me to see how andals, who have been the dominant force on westeros for thousands of years, interact with valyrians, who clearly want to keep ideas of valyrian supremacy alive somehow and essentially try to get the other dominant force in westeros to buy in (which they do!). like, are these two at odds sometimes? yes! but i don’t think it’s correct to say that the andals face ~prejudice for being andals or followers of the faith either!
#like certainly people in fandom get insane about the andals bc they’re projecting their hate of catholicism onto them.#but george himself is not writing about how all catholics are inherently evil he’s writing about the STRUCTURE being evil. i think the#series in fact finds something useful in one person’s individual faith & the way they may internalize it. that’s why we get the quiet isle!#getting on my soap box#yes i did see a post about the [redacted] being oppressed by the mean evil valyrians and rolled my eyes.#anyways like this idea that the valyrians are being forcibly assimilated? false! they are doing it very willingly as a matter of fact! aegon#and jaehaerys and viserys all in fact are clearly trying to mesh themselves with andals not bc they are forcing the family to assimilate#but bc they believe the only way to keep valyrian supremacy going is to team up with the culture in westeros that Does frequently impose#itself on its neighbors! i’m not saying the andals are like the ultimate big bad evil here either that’s just as stupid as the knee jerk#‘every targ is evil and anyone who fights them is morally corrupt’ thing that happens in this dumb ass fandom but i AM saying the andals cut#down every weirwood in the south & attempted to do like glorified missionary work in the iron islands instead of actually engaging w what it#is that makes the ironborn so fucking deranged.#anyways the only leaders who are unproblematic are mors and nymeria for managing to mesh two cultures in a way that wasn’t insane aksjdj#dorne has its problems re: deeply entrenched class structures & the use of marriage as punishment but at least people aren’t whipping#ellaria naked through the streets like the andals love to do to essosi women 😭😭#‘oh didn’t dorne oppress the rhoynar’ i said they were better not perfect thank you!!!!! aksjd
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dead by daylight-- the game where you can play as steve harrington from stranger things, and can get sent to partake in a match of murder hide and seek at midwich elementary from silent hill, where you can then use a lute to perform bardic inspiration from dungeons and dragons to give a bonus to your teammates, except for the one who is being chased by nemesis from resident evil 3.
#dbd#thoughts about media#yes steve's jacket is bugged. it's done this before but I didn't think it'd do it again.#better than whatever the hell bug aestri has rn with her face.#girl looked like the fucking unknown.#anyway I was lagging WAY. WAY too hard to try another match for a better picture with a different skin.#I just remembered I unlocked bardic inspiration on that day my internet actually cooperated and I HAD to see steve play the lute.#it's so cute. the survivors all smile when they play. T___T I have to see gabe. claude. and nancy do this.#but I'll wait until my internet isn't getting me randomly downed by zombies.#I'm pretty sure my lag got elodie killed too so I feel kind of bad but it is also sort of funny that I wasn't even playing-#-killer and still managed to get a survivor killed.#not that I haven't done that befoooore.... or that I haven't done it deliberately in the past...#I will never forget you RPD ghostface who showed me he had the matching “I'd kill for you” heart charm to my “hooked on you” one.#and then killed a david for me when I asked him as a joke LOL. we watched his body ascend in the entity's spidery limbs together.#it was a beautifully romantic moment <3#generally speaking I am a decent survivor who will die so you can get out. like a good steve player should be.#However. if the evil man that I find sexy is nice to me? I'm so so sooo sorry for what you're going to endure if he only wants to spare me.
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someone has been putting in the time and effort to keep track of all the pronouns and names used to refer to characters in hypmic as the series goes on and the amount of names gentaro has for dice fills me with so much rage lmao
#this is vee speaking#pls gencha i am BEGGING you to find a better way to handle your crush on dice LOL#like he’s actually 8 years old lol 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#those names are kinda crazy like i remember some of them myself#but arb sneaks in so many lmao when did gentaro call dice a being lesser than the CONCEPT of scum like huh??????? 😭😭😭😭😭😭#i don’t think they managed to include gentaro’s radio pronouns tho#like i could have sworn gentaro was lying and called himself some conglomeration of ramuda and dice’s names 🤔#i’m not nitpicking tho lol that would be mental i’m pretty sure it was from the deleted radios so it’s not like they could check 😭😭😭#op went and also listed the sources for those names it’s so crazy lol
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hiii your weekly sete ask:
wow his 2005 season was really Cursed affggghjk. like what do you mean he’s 7th with 7 retirements (more than that years top 4 combined) but also is the only guy aside from valentino in top 7 to not finish lower than 5th place…..
valentino was the curse really worth it being runner up to capirossi and melandri TWICE and in a row (joking)
haha... yeah... 'retirement' in motegi... definitely wasn't so eager to seal the title at honda's home race that he made an ill-advised overtake attempt on melandri and cleared them both out... two completely unrelated dnf's... haha...
anyway!! yeah!! valentino would make that trade with you all things considered - always got on well with capirossi, with melandri admittedly you have the whole drama of melandri thinking valentino switched up towards him... but tbf you do have to say valentino was impressively dogged at keeping melandri's first win at bay for as long as possible. the six races valentino doesn't win that year are estoril (very wet, kinda just settled for second), laguna (unfamiliar with the track and would never be one he really liked, finished behind the two americans who knew the track well), motegi (crazy how we'll just never know how that dnf happened... oh well let's move on), sepang (a bridgestone-dominated weekend, sealed the title there though), turkey (hampered by a poor start) and valencia (my god is he mid there, also he tried to smash himself up before the race which I swear he does like. repeatedly at that specific circuit. guess he knows he has the off season to recover)
the way the curse shakes out is that for the rest of sete and valentino's careers, whenever they both finish a race valentino is ahead. not a single exception! not one! but the thing is, right, sete's actual finishing position of seventh in the championship in 2005 is extra cruel because it... just is not representative of how competitive he was that season? this is where it becomes useful I have my 'curse tally' notes... 2004 we've already covered, 2006 is more depressing than fun (how is your luck so bad your ambulance crashes into a bus fifty metres before the hospital entrance), but 2005? oh yeah that sete season is fucked. do you know who won the best qualifier award that year?
narrator: he did not win his home race on sunday
you can also read the qualifying prowess from the average grid positions, and it's not even particularly close. sete averages 2.82 for the season, ahead of valentino at 4.12 and hayden at 4.29. he bags five pole positions, exactly as many as valentino. his average finishing position when he actually makes the chequered flag is 3.6, the third best that year behind vale's 1.44 and melandri's 3.5. unsurprisingly, 2005 is the only season this century where the strongest qualifier does not win a single race. that just isn't a thing that happens!! it shouldn't happen!! this is not a man who was suddenly slow. he also hadn't been particularly crash-prone in his previous honda seasons... one dnf in 2003, two in 2004... and seven in 2005. a nightmare
which raises the question... okay, not winning races is one thing, but what the fuck happened to sete? if you're not just slow all of a sudden, how are you suddenly dipping from p2 to p7 in the championship standings? so. *cracks knuckles* *gets out notes* let's go one by one and tally up exactly how sete's season went wrong (parentheses used to indicate grid positions, e.g. 'g2', and finishing positions, e.g. 'p2')
jerez (g2/p2): after a feisty start, sete leads the entire race up until three laps to the end - when valentino executes his overtake and looks all set for the win. but valentino makes a mistake on the final lap that lets sete back past, and he's frantic in his attempts to correct the error... it looks like sete might have this one won, until valentino steals it from him at the last corner, barging him aside with one foot off its peg. (more on the final lap here.) valentino's victory, immediately controversial, is followed by various post-race theatrics as the spanish crowd voice their displeasure and valentino rubs it in their faces. on the way to the podium, valentino breaks the fourth wall to mock sete for clutching at his shoulder - which he is then forced to walk back in estoril as it turns out sete had actually been injured (clips here). more on this, from broadbent's 'ring of fire':
(details of the gresini/zerbi dispute included below the cut)
estoril (g2/dnf): an increasingly wet race - conditions in which sete has always been excellent in (first 500cc race was won in the wet too). sete's shoulder is still injured from the jerez collision and he'd crashed that weekend already, but he leads comfortably at the start... it's always tricky to be in the front in those conditions and he ends up crashing out of the lead in lap 16 out of 24. would valentino have been so comfortable settling for the podium if sete had still been in the race?
shanghai (g1/p4): another wet race, this time at a new circuit. perhaps sete's confidence was dented by estoril, or perhaps he just wasn't quick enough in the conditions. he doesn't get the ideal start from pole, though he briefly runs ahead of valentino - before vale overtakes him and disappears into the distance. for most of the race, sete runs second, until eventually wildcard jacque overtakes him. with a few laps to go, sete's suddenly losing speed... it looks like he's dealing with some kind of mechanical issue and he's shaking his head down the straight. on the very last lap, his teammate melandri overtakes him for the final podium position. after the race, sete said he had already felt on the warm-up lap that something was wrong with his tyre, and that it was all he could do to minimise the damage and coax the vibrating tyre to the end
le mans (g4/p2): sete had won the two previous races at this track, beating valentino on the final lap in 2003 and extending his championship lead in 2004. this year, both sete and valentino get quite a poor start, and exit the first few corners seventh and sixth respectively. valentino starts his charge to the front before sete does - and sete's progress stalls for a bit when he makes an absolute hash of one of the chicanes. eventually, valentino is on the rear tyre of his teammate edwards, but takes his sweet time overtaking him.... sete hunts them both down, firing in lap records as he muscles his way to third, and valentino is quickly informed of just who is catching him. valentino overtakes edwards, but edwards quickly gets him back - which opens the door for sete, who slips past for second. the three once again converge and valentino eventually manages to get sete back. edwards runs it a little wide and valentino squeezes past, with sete able to take advantage of the open door to get through too. they quickly gap edwards and as sete stalks valentino, the commentators hype up the prospect of revenge, of 'payback time'... valentino takes a new circuit record on the final lap to hold sete off. he extends his hand for sete long enough that sete eventually acquiesces - in doing so affording valentino a courtesy his rival had not extended to him at sepang the year before
mugello (g2/dnf): this time last year, the first public cracks of the valentino/sete relationship were just starting to show. but a fight for victory between the two of them was not to be this time round. sete keeps p2 off the line; after some opening lap scrapping that includes a valentino overtake, sete is still in p2. then his teammate melandri rudely forces him wide while overtaking, so that sete briefly drops back to fourth - before muscling his way past capirossi and into third. he tussles a bit with biaggi... but ends up crashing on lap five. it already feels like curtains on any championship aspirations
catalunya (g1/p2): before the weekend, valentino says he believes melandri and biaggi, not sete, will be his main championship rivals. sete starts on pole, with valentino likewise on the front row. valentino gets a somewhat poor start... by the end of the first lap he's back in the mix at the front. the first few laps are frantic, with melandri leading most of them and making his teammate's life, uh, unpleasant - but eventually both valentino and sete make their way back and break away from the field. soon after, sete gets past valentino and leads the race. for a while, it looks like he's breaking away from valentino just a little... eventually, it becomes obvious valentino has just been biding his time. with three laps to go, vale eases past down the main straight into the braking zone of turn one, and immediately proceeds to destroy sete's circuit record on dying tyres. he wins the race fairly comfortably from there
assen (g2/p5): juan martinez, sete's crew chief, is taken ill on thursday with a migraine. he recovers to come back to the box on saturday, but unsurprisingly the team is on the back foot as a result. (remember, martinez used to work for valentino, and he is someone valentino explicitly blamed for what happened at qatar 2004.) sete starts reasonably well from the front row, second early on behind his teammate melandri before eventually falling behind hayden. meanwhile, valentino has gotten a typically atrocious start and gave himself a bit of work to do. sete eventually makes his way back past hayden - but unfortunately lets valentino through too. at the end of the seventh lap, valentino gets past sete at his beloved final chicane. after that, valentino goes on to win the race while sete languishes in fifth
laguna seca (g13/p5): sete executes a strong comeback ride, besides losing a duel to biaggi which I suppose is a new low. but the main thing I have to bring in at this juncture is one of my favourite sete's moments. this is from broadbent's 'ring of fire' again, in the context of the re-introduction of laguna to the calendar and the discussions around that. just remember that valentino has been tormenting sete for like, over half a year, and sete has not lashed out at valentino once publicly. but here... he finally snaps - and takes it out on the real enemy: marco melandri
quick friendly reminder that melandri was sete's teammate that year
donington (g2/dnf): the race is held in truly appalling conditions. sete - who, remember, was a known wet weather specialist - takes the lead early on. he crashes on the third lap, one of ten riders not to finish the race. after wobbling about in the front-running pack for most of the race, valentino eventually takes the lead before pulling comfortably clear. he mimes playing the violin while crossing the line; this was interpreted by some as mockery of his less fortunate rivals, which valentino refuted
before the race, valentino took another opportunity to twist in the knife:
"when I see gibernau I always want to arrive in front of him" uh huh
sachsenring (g2/p2): valentino had quite a few problems with his bike that weekend, with a tricky build-up to the race. initially, hayden gets the holeshot, as valentino starts piling up the pressure and sete gets stuck in traffic. but the race is red flagged - and while hayden again gets the holeshot at the restart, valentino quickly disposes of him and sete soon does likewise. sete swiftly overtakes valentino ("'take that', said sete gibernau, 'I mean business'" says one of the commentators) and leads from there, with valentino in hot pursuit. for a few laps, valentino ends up behind hayden - and once he gets past him again, he's seven tenths down on sete with six laps to go. valentino closes in and on the very last lap, sete goes wide into the first corner, letting valentino through
always thinking of the suggestion valentino was intending to overtake sete at exactly the same place he had been overtaken in 2003 (from here):
brno (g1/dnf): despite the summer break in between (where sete reportedly did a lot of training), this might as well have been a direct continuation of the previous race. sete leads out front as valentino determinedly muscles his way into second place so as to not let sete escape. on the very first lap, valentino overtakes sete - in a section of the track where sete was planning to overtake capirossi if capirossi got the holeshot (more on how forthcoming sete was being to the commentariat here and here, icl when I replied to those asks I didn't remember quite how bad it was). on the third lap, the two exchange a few overtakes, and then it's sete in front. valentino makes a mistake to give sete a bit of breathing room and almost let the pack swallow him up, but he escapes again to get on sete's tail. around halfway through, valentino takes the lead - and then, with just over four laps ago, valentino deliberately slows down and practically invites sete to go past, before slotting back in behind him. valentino takes the lead at the final chicane of the penultimate lap, setting the stage for a final lap showdown, except sete is beginning to lose touch... and then he slows down. sete has run out of fuel
japan (g7/dnf): all eyes on valentino - who starts from eleventh for his first matchpoint race - as he starts making his way through the pack. on the first lap, valentino's already made his way past sete for sixth. tragically, all footage of the race after this point was erased so we will simply never know what valentino got up to after this point in time, but sete reportedly crashed on lap eleven. "gibernau's wretched season continues, when will it end for sete gibernau... it's almost a year now since valentino rossi put that witch's curse on him at qatar and said he would never win another race, you've got to wonder..."
sepang (g2/dnf): as the riders storm down to turn one, sete and hayden make contact and barely keep their bikes upright - sete is knocked down to sixth. valentino ends up right behind him on the first lap once again, but gets stuck behind him for a little longer as sete works his way past hayden... before sete and nakano go down when the former attempts to overtake the latter on lap two. "sete gibernau's appalling season continues...." - sete begins to walk off before sinking to his knees in despair
qatar (g2/p5): back to the place where it all started. sete deploys some feisty riding to keep that second place off the line against both valentino and hayden. he takes the lead from capirossi on the third lap and valentino takes advantage to immediately force his way into second - ready to exert pressure on his enemy. but sete builds up a healthy advantage as his teammate melandri increasingly puts pressure on valentino. melandri and valentino exchange overtakes as sete's advantage ebbs and flows, eight tenths at one point while his two rivals tussle. could this really be the "resurgence of sete gibernau"? with six laps to go, valentino shows his front wheel to sete, but it gives melandri the opportunity to get past. as valentino attempts to return the favour, melandri cuts off his nose and causes valentino to almost run into the back of him - payback for motegi, which makes valentino run wide and almost fall back into the clutches of hayden. it looks like it will be a fight between the two gresini riders for the win as valentino is 1.2s back, but he quickly claws his way back into contention and is helped by the gresini duo scrapping. and when melandri has another go at sete, sete runs on into the gravel... "the man who has cracked once again is sete gibernau" "and I'm sure both marco melandri and rossi are smiling under their visors" from the commentary team - valentino snatches the win once again, with sete finishing a disconsolate fifth
phillip island (g3/p5): so much for another front row start, with sete getting battered around to fifth through the first few corners and quickly being pushed down to sixth by his teammate. from there, it's an unspectacular ride to fifth, as valentino claims another victory
turkey (g1/p4): another start from pole, but melandri gets the jump on him from the start. sete puts pressure on melandri and eventually gets back past to take the lead...... and then goes wide and runs it into the gravel. he recovers from sixth to a painful fourth. "you can just imagine valentino rossi grinning, can't you, behind his visor, when he saw that happen"
valencia (g1/dnf): once again, sete starts from pole.... surely, surely he has to win one of these? valentino starts from fifteenth on the grid, which you'd have to say is as good a chance as you're going to get to catch a break from the man. sete is shuffled down to third on the opening lap but is right on the tail of melandri and hayden, setting the field's fastest lap on lap two. on lap four, sete slows down... "and the spaniard's wretched season could end in the only possible way, another disappointment at his home round and yet more misery for movistar" - an engine failure. his teammate escapes out front while sete works through his grief on the side of the track
so, having assessed the evidence in an appropriately scientific manner... well, yes. sete was kinda fucked. you have plenty of bad luck, you have races where he's simply not fast enough, you have races where valentino forces the issue and beats him in a straight fight, and then you have quite a few races where sete makes a clear 'unforced' error. it's not even necessarily the crashes that are most painful - with sachsenring, qatar and turkey standing out as real low points, times when he feasibly could have had valentino (as well as his teammate, who he also dislikes) beat. his wet weather dnf's will also have been a bitter pill to swallow, as well as valentino's lovely habit of snatching circuit records as he pulls clear from sete right at the end of races. and all the while, valentino is happy to taunt him with his failures, reminding sete again and again of how he is no longer the challenger he once was. all the while, the narrative of the curse gathered momentum, ever more likely to make its way back to sete. with every failure, the pressure grew. there's got to be at least ten races where sete on pace could have been in victory contention, five races where he bags pole, fourteen front row starts... not a single actual win. and that's how you put together a curse, kids
here's the gresini/zerbi dispute:
Movistar Honda team manager Fausto Gresini sent an open letter to the media on Thursday night in response to a private letter sent by FIM President Francesco Zerbi to MotoGP riders Valentino Rossi and Sete Gibernau following last weekend's clash during the Jerez race. Mr Zerbi´s letter had invited the riders to reflect upon the incident, and to remain as positive examples for all MotoGP fans - asking them to fight fairly and without will of revenge. The FIM President also wrote that he didn't see any infringement to the rules, but stressed that this kind of situation shouldn't be repeated. The comments made by Gresini were: "I fully agree with President Zerbi about the fact that sportsmanship is the most important thing. There's no room for bitter feelings between two great riders, but in the meantime, I'm still perplex." "In this letter, Sete and Valentino are treated equally as if Sete had some responsibility in the facts, and I can't agree with that. I believe there is a contradiction when the FIM president writes 'there isn't anything to reproach you for from a legal point of view', and then warns that what happened in Jerez must not occur again." "It means that we're still far from a situation where all have equal rights, in a sport as dangerous as ours," concluded the Italian manager. [here is the presidents response]: Dear Mr Gresini, I should not respond personally to your open letter given to the press, but through the intermediary of my lawyers; however, considering that I subscribe to the rules of courtesy and that I believe private life is a right that no-one can deny, I am not going to enter into a controversy - an easy one given the ridiculous arguments in your letter. The only thing that I want to stress and which, as a man, mortifies me is that I am mistaken in my judgement of men. And that I say on an individual level far more than on an institutional level. With much bitterness, Francesco Zerbi FIM President NB: I am sending this letter to the press because your employee, by violating all principles of education, more so than of law, did not hesitate to betray the confidence that had been granted to him.
like "with much bitterness" why is everyone in this sport so dramatic. what was everyone on this year
#weekly sete ask!! answered very late!! bless u anon#writing out my lil journal of doom#i like how it's implied that not only is valentino whispering into sete's ear but he's also giving his crew chief headaches#'this isn't ballroom dancing' the extent to which valentino and jb matched each other's freak isn't really acknowledged enough#jb always on the sidelines explaining how valentino's opponents should have simply tried not being axe murdered. skill issue#anyways. melandri has whatever the opposite of main character energy is#i am also unconvinced the curse was worth finishing behind him twice anon#sete being publicly ruder about melandri than he ever actually manages to be about valentino iktr#it's soooooo funny to me like melandri barely even moved??? what WAS that#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#the process of writing this post is me coming back to my notes like once a week and laughing at the sete/melandri quote#like i'm laughing typing this. what even was that#melandri (amongst others): hm i'm not sure this track is suitable for us to go racing on#sete: pls kys i can't do this any longer#valentino a worse man than me in some ways but also a better man than me in that i would've just started laughing#curse tag
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Part 2 is dedicated to all the Dancing Queens out there!
Part: 1 / 2 / 3 (Speech bubbles in alt text)
#i am sorry for the lack of milou he had better plans for the night because he's not a loser#so milou tortures thompsons or something#tintin didn't tell them about the karaoke night because he knew they would say yes and the last thing he wants is more audience#chester said i will do the bare minimum and damn he committed to it#haddock is dressed something like royalty i suppose??? yet he went to save his knight in distress lol#the real dancing queen is chang yes i will allow him this win at least#ok but i want to add something my brother noticed in the way i am writing these pairs#tintin and haddock seem total opposites they manage to communicate and understand each other with ease#while chang and chester seem like they would get along as they're both of the same calm vibe but in reality they struggle to communicate#and i think he is so right this is exactly what happens and the main difference between them#here's a cookie if you read this far#tintin#captain haddock#archibald haddock#chang chong chen#captain chester#the adventures of tintin#haddotin#cheche#i guess??? it's a disaster#changster#my art
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Poor guy, he's so, so thirsty... maybe you should help him out.
#small reupload because I didn't like his shoulders and by cropping it I like the drawing better lmao#the crow#am I making Sylv a vampire for Halloween??? maybe#finally managed to draw him in a way that I actually like it's a miracle
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sometimes boys (students) will force you to enforce the rules to the strictest measure of the disciplinary law.
#sometimes I think they WANT you to#like it’s the only way they feel safe#I can manage girls pretty well (not always) with a balance of warmth and interest gentle course correcting etc.#it doesn’t not work on boys they feel the power of it but they struggle against it too#they’re kind of like. no. punish me#and I need to get better at doing it faster lol#I had a kid who last year who really took it so well when I finally showed that I was mad and dealt out consequences#like. he changed! he grew up!#he still thinks well of me#so it’s nice to have that in my back pocket#but yeah I have a teenage boy going through it and I am so good at getting a student to a place where I don’t have to use disciplinary#measures#but sometimes too good. the disciplinary rout is better and cleaner and ultimately more effective#anyway he’s getting detention tomorrow#and a flash of anger if he tries to step to me about it
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