#but how DARE you make Crowley attractive!?

[twisted-up-in-wonderland]

I absolutely LOVE this which is why I would like to complain to OP because they had NO RIGHT to make Crowley look actually hot what the FUCK I demand a lawyer 😭😂

Thank you for the requests! There will be more 🙇‍♀️💖

[booksandmate]

not to be boring but i don't think aziraphale fell in love with crowley before the beginning and crowley in eden.

i think they fell in love in a very human way. slowly over the years, spending time together, sharing their experiences and realizing how alike they are in their differences. i think theirs is the "i cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. it's too long ago. i was in the middle before i knew that i had begun" kind of love. (yes, quoting my beloved jane austen because i can).

"oh but the way aziraphale looked at him when they created the stars" 1. angel crowley would make god look twice. 2. presumably heaven has always been the same. a bunch of angels silently following orders. crowley was different, he was passionate about the creation. he loved it, cared about it and was willing to protect it. aziraphale saw that in him and found it beautiful in the same way that we do.

"but the way crowley looked at him when he told her he had given up his sword" crowley had just met an angel who dared to think for himself instead of following direct orders. of course he is impressed, of course he is deeply attracted to him. he sees in him someone who might be able to understand.

these two moments are crucial, yes, but (in my opinion) not because they instantly fell in love, but rather because they mark the beginning of something absolutely beautiful. something so great and unique that it defies definition. something ineffable, you may say.

[jamil-s-wifey]

Hello! Can I request drunken reader and drunken Jack howl making out and about to go further but there's a knock on the door that brings them back to reality? They weren't thinking straight in the moment and now they don't know how to act with each other after the heated makeout and groping session

Thank you!

Ah, I love these types of requests so much omg! I made it kind of open-ended, do tell if you wish for a part two of this! This is so cute! We love them drunken shenanigans. One slightly lime-y scenario with extra vodka, coming right up~~ ALSO A TON OF CURSING!

P.S. This is happening during MC and Jack's 3rd year, so that they are of legal age for both the nsfw part and the drinking, (at least in my country) AND to still be together most of the time, and be in that crush phase~

P.P.S. Alcohol is fun until it's not! Drink responsibly~~

How your friends managed to procure alcohol on campus was beyond you. How they hid it from Crowley was even more beyond you. Did it matter? Not necessarily. Not when you were having so much fun!

Towards the end of your third year, you decided to celebrate together with your friends. After all, the future was uncertain. Ace, Deuce, Sebek, Jack, Epel and of course Grim and you, everybody was there! You all stayed at Ramshackle, away from prying eyes. So here you were, drinking to your heart's content, celebrating the end of the school year, reminiscing, laughing, playing games like truth or dare, you know how it is.

As time passed, everybody reluctantly returned to their respective dorms until only you and Jack remained. Even Grim had gone who knows where to probably sleep off the ungodly amount of food he'd consumed.

.................

"So, I don't really want tonight to end yet. If you've got nothing better to do, how about we drink one more?" You proposed, taking a sip of your drink. You were currently facing each other, cross-legged on your bed.

"Yeah, I'd like that." He smiled back, tail swishing behind him. The more he drank, the more he let loose. He was leaning back, eyes glazed over from the alcohol. A sight to behold. And my my, were you beholding it.

Your gaze travelled down his body, before moving to the alcohol, taking a big gulp. You couldn't exactly help yourself, not when Jack was just sitting there, on YOUR bed, all attractive and shit.

"Let's play a staring game!" Suddenly you chimed in. Then you could stare at him and compete at the same time.

"Staring game? Okay, bring it on."

"But with a twist." (Hehe, twist)

"Oh no"

"Oh yes. We can try anything to get the other person to blink."

"Anything?"

You realised the implications of your words and your cheeks heated up almost immediately.

"Yes. Anything."

"....okay."

He moved closer to you, using you as leverage, so that you could be perfectly face to face, with little space between you two, less than an arms length. His own heart skipped a beat at the closeness and your implication, which was FOR ONCE not lost on him. Perhaps it was the alcohol? It is a great way of dropping your inhibitions.

"3... 2... 1... Start!"

And so the game began. The first few seconds were easy, until you reached out to try and poke him, only for him to firmly grab your hand. His eyes read determination...and a little something more.

"Killjoy."

"I'm just playing the game, MC."

But then, you reached out and with your other hand and gently cupped his cheek. His eyes widened, but he still remained unblinking. However, his gaze slowly moved downwards, from your eyes to your lips. His own hand moved to rest on your knee. It was getting increasingly harder not to blink. You slowly slid your hand out of his grasp and moved it to his knee, mirroring his actions, only you didn't stop there. Slowly gliding your hand further up his thigh, you knew you were getting a rise out of him. Perhaps it was the alcohol talking, or just your own subconscious looking for-.

"Fuck. I really want to kiss you right now."

Before you could stop yourself, you had closed the distance between you two and smashed your lips on his. And my god, was it glorious. Thin lips moving against your own warm ones, big strong hands moving up your thighs, resting on your waist. It wasn't the most romantic kiss, but god it was passionate and hungry, and needy.

With resolve almost fully broken, he pulled you towards him, manhandling you onto his lap as if you weighed nothing - which for him, you did. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer. It was cathartic, the release of finally tasting him, feeling him, all over you, crashing into you like waves of desire. His hands slid down, to the small of your back, engulfing you.

Pulling back, he looked at you, eyes glazed over, breathless, wanting, barely cohesive from that intoxicating kiss. He nodded, silently asking you if you were okay. Even drunk, needy and turned on out of his mind, he was a gentleman. You settled a little more comfortably on his lap pushing him back to lay on your bed, before demonstratively moving one of his hands to your ass - your very physical answer.

The growl that left him was unlike anything you'd ever heard before, and god, did you feel it wash over you like a heatwave. He pulled you in for another kiss, this time deeper, slower, much more sensual, hands freely roaming over your body. From your ass, toy your hips, to your chest, he couldn't stop himself - not with your intoxicating scent, engulfing his very being, with the small whimpers coming from you through the kiss. His hips moved involuntarily, grinding against your core. Fuck he was so hard it was almost painful, and you were so fucking wet for him. And he smelled it, god he smelled it, and he knew.

Suddenly, he flipped you two over, pushing you onto the bed and caging you between his arms. You were so gorgeous beneath him, hair tangled, slightly sweaty, eyes glazed over, heaving, with reddened lips. He wasted no time moving to leave heated kisses and darkened hickeys down your neck, scenting the absolute hell out of you. One hand moved under your shirt, exploring the soft skin on your stomach and pushing right underneath your bra. So warm, so soft, so fucking perfect, he wanted to feel all of you. And when the palm of his hand brushed over your hardened nipple, when you moaned so sweetly, when you tangled your fingers in his hair, pulling on it so deliciously, fuck it was over for him.

"Let me undress you. I want to undress you. I want you naked underneath me." He mumbled, lost on the taste of your skin and the sound of your breathy moans.

"Then undress me, big boy~"

He left another searing kiss right on your lips, committing their softness to memory. Then he moved back just enough to grab the hem of your shirt to pull it up.

Knock knock knock

Fuck.

"Oi! MC! I think I ditched my phone there! Y'sleeping?"

Ace, of all times-

You two looked at each other, before hastily jumping off the bed, making yourself look as decent as possible.

Flushed beyond salvation, you looked around, indeed spotting Ace's phone on the floor. On the floor, which was about to be littered with your clothes-

Oh my god. Were you about to have sex with Jack?!

Grabbing the phone, you opened the door just a little bit and handed it to Ace. "Here."

"Damn, you seem pretty out of it, y'still drinking with Jack?"

Fuck, don't mention him right now.

"Yeah, we were just about to clean...up around here and...call it a night."

"Cool, I can wait for him so we can walk back together."

"Uh...we still have some cleaning up to do. You go back. Okay?" Please, just fucking go.

"Suuuuure. Yeah. Okay. Gotcha. G'night then."

And with that he was gone. Somehow, you knew that he knew. But perhaps, he was just too tired to mention it. Or maybe, he was saving all his teasing for tomorrow?

What about Jack?

You turned back, only to find him actually picking up the glasses and tidying up.

"You... don't actually have to do that, you know?"

"It's the uh ... Least I can do."

"Uh-huh."

Fuck. Why was this so awkward, this shouldn't be this awkward, you've known each other for years. Did you just seriously wash 3 years of friendship down the goddamn drain?!

"I...think we should talk." "I think I should go."

Really? Did you guys really say it at the exact same time? This isn't some shoujo anime-

"Can we-"

"Tomorrow?"

"Huh?"

"T-tomorrow. Talk tomorrow."

"I don't think I-"

"Let us be at least...sober."

Fuck. He had a point.

"Okay."

"Uh....Goodnight, then."

"Yeah... Goodnight.

Before he could leave, though, he turned around to look at you.

"I-"

Welp. Here goes nothing I guess. If tomorrow's gonna be awkward regardless, then you... Might as well... Right?

You stepped on your tippy toes and left the smallest of kisses on his cheek.

"Bye, Jack."

His eyes widened, tail gently swishing behind him.

"Bye, MC."

What a night.

[wistfulnightingale]

Reflections and Divisions (or, Mirrors in the Show, Mirrors of Ourselves)

Mini-Meta Musing #11

Good Omens is a truly wonderful show. It's among the friendliest, healthiest fandoms out there, and has attracted multitudes of people from all over the world, across generations. We look at the lovably flawed characters and see people we can relate to. Nevermind that they are literally Angels and Demons -- we decide which we identify with, a little of this, a little of that, or all in! Am I more of an angel? Am I mostly demon? Do I ride out the waves, or create them? Am I sassy? Cool? Defiant? Awkward? Daring? Devoted?

For some of us, like me, we see Neurodivergent representation there, coded or otherwise. We ponder if fast-moving, book-tossing Crowley has ADHD traits like we do, or if Azriaphale's social naiveté and fixated earnestness is a cinnamon roll bundle like our own Autism. Even then, not everyone with neurodivergence sees themselves perfectly reflected there. But it's still comforting. (And Maggie herself, both the character and Maggie Service the actor, gives us an actually Autistic icon to smile about!)

The story within the show is structured on the compatibility and contrast of complementary opposites. Demon and Angel in our beloved Ineffables. Practical vs. Idealist in Nina and Maggie, who themselves are mirrors of Crowley and Aziraphale. Gabriel and Beelzebub, although when I look at that pair, I'm drawn to see their similarities more than their differences.

This structure creates interesting dynamics in the fandom itself. Not only do we find ourselves relating to the characters' identities, we are drawn to relate to their experiences. Their challenges and obstacles reflect our own. Many of us have dealt with ridiculous work bureaucracy, too much paperwork, isolation. We've dealt with social rejection and judgmentalism. For some of us, religious trauma. A lot of us have had to fight for independence, the right to live our lives as we wish and to be who we are, regardless of others' harsh opinions. We see that in Crowley and Aziraphale, and love them for it. We want them to fight for each other.

When each of us watch the Final Fifteen, we see ourselves reflected there too. Many of us have experienced at least one painful and complicated break-up in our lives. Rejection, or being incredibly misunderstood by someone you love and trust, can feel excruciating. Some of us have been fortunate enough to experience genuine acceptance in a loving relationship. If we're older folk, maybe it's been long-term. Or maybe not, but maybe we feel happy about the time we had that was good.

It's the one, singular part of the fandom I see division in. Maybe you've noticed it too. Most of the time it's handled with good grace and kindly disagreement. But it does make discussion of the Final Fifteen complicated sometimes, doesn't it? Whichever "side" you relate to, it seems so clear that THAT is the experience you see there. How can others NOT see it? The Ineffables are our mirrors.

It's like looking at clouds. Or the old Rorschach ink-blot test. We see what makes sense to us. And our Ineffables are so Wonderfully Human, like us, in all our glories and failings.

The Final Fifteen is agonizing to watch. Their pain and confusion is real and raw. For many of us, it sets off sympathetic echoes. We may ourselves feel angry, betrayed. We may feel heartbroken, tearful, even protective. It might make us want to take sides, like when a dear friend has been hurt in a relationship. If we blame Azi, we either condemn him entirely, or sympathize with how he seemed to misread the situation and communicated so poorly. We shake our heads and commiserate with Crowley at that desperate, ill-timed kiss.

For me, I was crushed after the first watch. And the second. But when I re-watched the series yet again, I saw a Love in Season 2 that (to me) was too solid to crumble with such ease. Most especially, I saw a Love that was acknowledged, a partnership that was real and established, not something that had never even occurred to Crowley before. "Our car..." "We both get plenty of use out of it [the bookshop]." "A sherry for Lady Bracknell" (who is a proper dowager from Oscar Wilde's "The Importance of Being Earnest" btw). The self-aware embarassment and cautious contact was long gone. Instead, there are unmistakable looks of flirtation, and private jokes, and shared memories, and familiarity. An "Our Song!" They even fight with more openness and trust, secure that expressed anger and Apology Dances will lead to eventual resolution.

That's how "I Believe in Nightingales" came about. I believe that the relationship is indeed An Old Married Couple who has grown up a lot since Season 1. A bonded couple who have rhythms of their own, little looks and understandings. Who accept each other in all their flaws, and even find the differences attractive sometimes. Or ridiculous sometimes, but still love and accept those differences unconditionally. That the complementary opposites form a united whole.

It also put me on a quest to make sense of that belief. I started looking for clues, spending waaaaay too many hours scrutinizing details, looking at footage in slow motion, taking screenshot after screenshot. And loving every moment of it! Good Omens is, I believe, a superb piece of craftsmanship. That's why, 16 months later, we're still talking and posting and theorizing! I'll be posting some theories myself in a day or two.

The beauty of Good Omens is also that it's a home for the dreamers, the outcasts, the oddballs, the lovers. There's room for all of us.

Here's to us always making room for each other...

Here's to Our World!

(A shoutout to @kimberleyjean, whose beautiful posts, examining dualities and mirroring in Good Omens, inspired a metaphor to express the thoughts I've been pondering for months! And to @sendarya for her lovely video essay/discussion on YouTube from the IneffableCon 5, Exploring Belonging in Good Omens.)

[quantum1mmortality]

Wiggity wack yo(🍋Crewel x Fem! Reader x Sam🍋)

Real not click bait

OKAY AHHHHH so I was told by my boyfriend that tumblr is gonna think im a bot for a bit I can assure you I'm not so im offering this for peace

Okay uhm now back to the fic LOLO

♧CW!! Fem reader, fem pronouns, fem descriptions for body parts, sex with older sexy men yummy, READER IS NOT YUU!!!, reader is like staff or some shit idk make your own shit up i dont care, penis stuff, what stuff? Idk yet your guess is as good as mine, anal AND vagina sex, at the same time btw, threesome or however you spell it M/M/F, yeah you're getting them both at the same time crazy shit ik, I can take them both, what? In a fight? Who said anything about a fight? We get praised, bc my biggest kink is being loved, I love these two, im used to Ao3 im so sorry for how this is formatted, also I hella ship crewel x sam and they will be together in this fic dont you dare think they won't.

Okay so yeah the CW does have a lot of jokes in it but im nervous bc this is my first fic thats like this but it does have actual warnings btw so please read them

NOT PROOFREAD!!!

Okay now onto the fic. Enjoy, you horny goblin.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~

♧It had been two months since you came to NRC for the first time.

Crowley hired you to be a counselor for the boys in the school. He decided that having a housewarden overbolt every so often wasn't worth the trouble and they needed a shoulder to cry on. And that just so happened to be you.

Crowley had made it apparent he wanted you, telling the agency you worked with that it had something to do with "women being better at comprehending emotion." You didn't mind, the pay was generous and the students were sweet enough to make you want to stay.

You already met most of the students by now, having all the housewardens in every other day just to express their family issues was something you had to deal with. Having the vice housewardens in afterwards wasn't very pleasurable either, but you had to make do. Sometimes Crowley would come in just to see how things were going, he'd say it was to "be generous", he brought you food Sometimes too.

You found yourself getting very close to the married couple of the school, Sam and Crewel. They were very sweet to you, complementing your style when you'd come in, hang out with you during break, Crewel would even bring you snacks from Sam's shop when he had the chance. You would hang out with them a lot, and though you didn't want to admit it, you did find both of them attractive, but you would never hurt their marriage.

Every once in a while, Crewel and Sam invited you over to their house. You'd have drinks, play games, get into really deep conversations about how Crowley sucked, the things friends do.

You didn't want to admit your feelings. You didn't want to admit how you'd slightly blushing when they were being nicer than usual. You didn't want to admit how your heart would beat out of its chest when Crewel would stand behind you, snaking his hands over yours to guide them to teach you how to make a margarita. You didn't want to admit how you'd get so excited when Sam would willingly buy your favorite snacks and have Crewel deliver them to you. It wasn't worth losing two amazing friends over two simple crushes.

You had just gotten done a long day of counseling all the first years, Ace and Deuce to get their counseling together. It was just as hectic as it sounded, taking up almost 4 hours of your time with other students coming and leaving when they realized how long the wait would be. You needed a way to relax and get your mind off this job. Luckily, Crewel came into your office at the end of the day and invited you over for drinks.

This was the perfect stress reliever, hanging out with your two amazing friends and having drinks sounded perfect after a long day. Crewel quickly noticed how tired you were, your disheveled appearance quaking from the little sleep you had. He decided to schedule the meet up for later in the day so you'd get some sleep beforehand. "We don't want you falling asleep on us, now do we?" Crewel gives you a small chuckle and a wink before bidding his goodbye and leaving.

Getting up from your chair with an exhausted sigh, you pack your notes into your bag and leave your office, locking the door behind you. Crowley said to always lock your office when you aren't there, something about the students being nosy and may snoop around. It didn't matter though, it was the end of the school day and the start of the weekend, who would spend their Friday snooping around in a counselors office?

Finally getting to the chamber room and walking through the mirror, you're at the part of campus where all the staff lives. Medium sized houses in a nice circle with Treins house being the biggest and in the middle. Unlocking your front door, you sigh and take off your jacket while laying your keys down on the table next to the door. Going upstairs and into your room, you take your bra and skirt off, climbing into bed after setting an alarm.

Crewel was nice enough to set the meet up back a few hours, scheduling it for 10. Giving you a nice 4 and a half hours to catch up on much needed sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After being asleep for around 4 hours, you awoke to your alarm going off. It was 9:25, giving you 30 minutes to get ready.

Getting out of bed you hop into the shower to get washed up. Using the lovely sugar scrubs you usually do and washing your (H/L) (H/C) hair with a wonderful smelling shampoo and conditioner. Getting out of the shower, blow drying your hair and figuring out what to wear.

You finally decided on a nice (F/C) dress, not too skin tight, but leaving enough to the imagination to make it desirable. Luckily it wasn't out of the ordinary for you to wear something like this, so they wouldn't think anything of it.

It was getting to the time of leaving, so you quickly pack your things and head out. Closing the door behind you, you walk across the empty street and make it to their door. Since they lived in the same house, you would often catch them walking out early in the morning. It was convenient to say the least.

Knocking three times before the door opens with enthusiasm, you're greeted with Crewels smiling face as he greets you. He holds the door open as you walk in, taking your bag and coat off and putting them on the hangers near the door. Sam greets you from the kitchen, beckoning you to come and see him.

When you do, he has a bunch of machinery on the counter. "Sam used to be a barista before he started working here. He stopped a long time ago, but his love for coffee didn't. We decided to invest in some machinery to indulge in his hobby. Expensive, but worth it to see him happy." Crewel says as he walks behind you and gives you a smile.

"I've always loved working with coffee, the pure smell alone is enough to drive a man, me, wild. Come here, I'll show you have to work an expresso machine!" Sam says with a huge smile on his face. Something tells you alcohol isn't being involved tonight, perhaps its for the better.

Walking over to Sam he steps behind you and guides your hands to the different cups and powders to make a shot of expresso. Did Crewel and Sam always have similar ways of teaching? They aren't like this to the other staff..

After making the expresso, Sam grabs some coffee he brewed earlier. Pouring it into a mug and the expresso on top, he starts the foam art. Watching him pour the foam in different directions was almost mesmerizing, and soon enough, you had a little foam kitty! How cute!

Sam had finished his and Crewels coffee and you sat down at the coffee table with them. They were silent, more than usual. Their eyes would dart across the room, occasionally landing on you but quickly shifting focus. It seemed as though they wanted to say something, but couldn't figure out how to put it.

"Is something wrong? You guys are awfully silent tonight, I hope I didn't upset you in anyway-" you trailed off, trying to figure out what was going on.

"No, no! Its not you at all!" They both practically shouted while jumping from their chairs, spilling some coffee in the process. Grabbing some tissues and sitting down, they clean themselves up.

"Look, we've been meaning to ask you something- its just- we don't know how to exactly ask about it." Sam says, Crewel still trying to dab some coffee off of the vest hes wearing.

"We think that, maybe, we can open our marriage, but, just to you. We want to try things with you, see what we like, experiment a little." Crewel adds with flushed cheeks. He must be pretty nervous about this.

Sam takes a nervous sip of his coffee before continuing on what Crewel had just stated. "We trust you. We think that you're the only person that could be fit for this, and we're willing to help you explore that side of you. The 'nastier' side, so I've heard the kids say."

Well that was a lot to take in, a bit too much actually. You had felt your entire face heat up as you realized what they meant. A sort of rush of adrenaline creep in. Was this actually happening? You've wanted it bad since you first met them, but you never thought it would actually happen.

Sam and Crewel looked at you as you completely space out. You could feel the tension in the air, their stares getting impatient as their cheeks formed new colors you'd never seen on them.

"We completely understand if you don't want to do this, we won't force you into anyth-" Crewel chimed in after deciding the silence was too much, but was then swiftly cut off.

"I'll do it. I mean- I want to, that is. I've been wanting to, I just didn't want to make you guys uncomfortable. I mean, you're always so sweet to me, I thought we just had something platonic going on, but I had no clue you guys felt the same." You say while practically being out of breath. Pressing your thighs together as an instinct, Crewel quickly switches his gaze to a lovely house plant as his cheeks heat up more.

"Are you sure you want to do this? We'd never force you into anything, but we do want your full consent." Sam practically sighs out. Crewel is still red, but now is occasionally sparing glances at you.

"Yes, im sure. You may do whatever you please." Chuckling, you say with a smile directed to them. Sam gives you a soft smile while Crewel stands up from his chair.

"I'll get everything situated. Sam, if you want to take her into the bedroom and get her situated, that would be appreciated, I'll be in as soon as I'm done getting everything ready." Crewel says while walking out of the room, giving you both a wink on the way out.

"Alrighty then! Let's get you ready!" Sam yells while taking your hand and leading you to the bedroom. When you walk in, you take in the beautiful scenery. Large king sized bed, beautiful red curtains, their bedroom is huge! "Dont be intimidated, Crowley decided to give us extra space. He says we're his 'little gay friends.' We're not even completely gay! Wiggity wack, yo!"

You were so grateful that Sam knew how to break the silence and make you comfortable you didn't even notice he had left your side to go to one of their personal cabinets. "We had been planning this for awhile, we just didn't want to scare you away is all. Crewel and I had picked up a few sets of lingerie for you. You can try them on while we wait for him to get back! No pressure of course. I just figured you may not have expected something like this to happen and you wanted to change into something more... fitting... for the occasion."

Then, it hit you. You were wearing such normal panties, it hurt! Shame on you, shame on you!

Going to the cabinet, you skimmed through the sets of lingerie. None really caught your eye, until you landed on a lacy white two peice with pearly accents. Sexy, baby!

"Oh, you like that one? Thats Crewels favorite. Hes gonna go batshit crazy if he sees you in that! Personally I dont give a shit what you're wearing, you'll be naked and in my arms by the end of the night so it doesn't matter." He says with a smug look on his face. Was that... a threat? Why was it sexy for him to say if it was? He was leaning with his arms crossed on the cabinet, looking for any sign that you were uncomfortable. They really were putting your needs above theirs.

"Go! Try it on! I wanna see Crewels face when he comes back!" He lightly shooshes you away with a hearty laugh that made your cheeks red. After showing you to the bathroom, he leaves you to the privacy of the semi cold, hard floor room. Getting changed, you heard the door open and Crewel walk in. Sam and him were talking about something you just couldn't hear what. Putting the panties to the lingerie set on, you had realized they untied at the sides. How convenient! Stepping outside, you felt their eyes practically rip you apart.

"Hot diggity dog! I'm so sorry, that sounded so weird oh my god." Sam slaps his face before cupping his eyes in embarrassment. Crewel sent him a death glare before looking back at you with wide eyes and completely red cheeks.

"Uhm.. we should uh.. go over safety precautions. Our safeword is going to be, 'blue', understood?" Crewels voice was shaky and he was clearly avoiding your gaze, but he did sound serious. Shaking your head yes, he continues. "Alright. Remember, any time you get uncomfortable, or you want to stop, or anything, just say the safeword and we'll stop immediately. As for everything else, I got some things for us. Just to make everything a smoother process is all. Lube, vibrators, simply just things to have your body relax. As for protection, both Sam and I can't have kids. In our defense we didn't think something like this would happen."

"In short, you're gonna be fine. We'll make sure you're treated nice and good, don't worry. Crewel and I are, as the kids would say, 'freaks in the sheets', but we'll wait until later dates to actually try those things with you. If you're comfortable, that is." Sam smiles at you. It was comforting to see all the precautions they're taking.

"I'm okay with anything really, I mean, I dont have very much experience but im willing to try things out! It's just, im a bit nervous is all.." Sam looks at you as though he's seen something so otherworldly gorgeous he can't explain it, and he gently takes your hands.

"Hey, dont be scared, okay? We'll go as slow as you want, and if at anytime you want to stop we will. We just want you to have a good time." Sam winks as he gives your hands a gently squeeze of reassurance. Crewel was silently taking off his coat all the while looking at the way the lingerie was hugging your body. Blush was covering your cheeks as you take your hands out of sams grasp and cup them together in a nervous fashion.

"Thanks.. its just this outfit im wearing is starting to be a bit uncomfortable." You say while looking away from their prying eyes.

"Well let's take it off then." Crewel says with a grin on his face while making eye contact.

"Mhm. I agree. If its making you so uncomfortable we should take it off." Sam says while giving you his signature grin. He takes your hand and leads you to their shared bed, sitting you on his lap in the middle of the comfortable mattress. Crewel followed and crawled towards the two of you, while landing front of you and spreading your legs gently.

Sam slowly leans into the crook of your neck, "I'm gonna take these off, okay?" He whispers in your ear as he places the strings of your panties in his fingers. Nodding in agreement, he gives the shell of your ear a soft nip, earning a small yelp from you, making the men giggle.

He slowly takes his fingers and pulls on the drawstrings, Crewel in front of you, watching in anticipation. Shyness taking over, you instinctively shut your legs close when Sam begins to take the peice of loose fabric off.

Crewel places one hand on your inner thigh and pries them open, clicking his tongue while shaking his head in light hearted dissapointment. "Ah-ah, no hiding sweetheart, cmon, you'll be begging to be touched more by the end of the night, we have to start somewhere, dont we?" Crewels voice was laced with last, you had never heard him act like this before, but God you wanted more.

You you began to crawl up Sams lap in a stroke of nervousness, to which he only gave a soft smile at. "You'll be a good girl for Divus, wont you? You'll be so good for him, let him eat you out, right?" Sam says from behind you in a teasing tone, while Crewel waited patiently for your response. Nodding yes, Crewel dove between your legs like a starved man.

A loud moan escapes your lips from the sudden burst of pleasure, earning a chuckle from the man behind you. Placing both hands on Sam's thighs in an attempt to keep your balance, you only ended up digging your fingernails into his skin. Leaving harsh, painful nail marks on his legs, Sam groans at the sudden pain. He takes his hand, interlocking it in Crewels hair and pulling him forward so he can reach deeper parts of you. You moan loudly at Crewel being able to hit spots no one else could, and Sam takes his hand out of Crewels hair and places two fingers on your clit, making circular motions with light pressure.

With all the stimulation, it doesn't take long for you to cum, which you do with a loud moan. Crewel licks all of your juices up and swallow them in a single motion. "Delicious, as expected." He says as he softly caresses your cheek for comfort. Sam begins to rub slow circles into the flesh of your thigh, giving them light pinches every word often.

Crewel begins to unbuckle his belt with one hand, the other still stroking your cheek. "Are you alright with taking us both at the same time? Its alright if not, we can take turns if you'd like." Crewel makes eye contact with you as he asks, making you swallow hard in anxiety. As you begin to think, Sam lays his head in the crook of your neck in anticipation.

"I'm alright with taking you both at the same time, its just please be slow, im a little scared is all... this is my first time doing something like this..." you say as a small chuckle comes from them both. "Of course we'd be slow silly! You're our main priority, so we just want to make you comfortable." Sam says as he kisses your neck and slowly retreats from his resting place on your shoulder.

"I'd suggest you prepare her for... well, anal. You're alright with that, right?" Crewel asks with concern in his eyes. Now THIS was something you didn't expect tonight, but not unwelcome.

"I'm okay with it! But please, please be gentle, I've never done this before." You say as you look behind you at Sam. He gives you a smile before ruffling your hair. "I know I know, I'll be gentle I swear." He says as he begins to let his slender fingers roam to you ass. "Get ready, okay? This is gonna feel weird and possibly hurt for a minute, but it'll get better."

Taking a deep breath, you nod your head. Sam takes one finger and begins to slowly inch his way in, letting you stretch out. You slowly grown out at the alien feeling, gripping Sam's thighs harder than you were before.

He begins to curl his finger in you, slipping in another one as you start to loosen up more. Crewel could sense the way it hurt, he leaned down and started kissing and rubbing your thighs gently, hoping it would help you ease.

Sam could feel you loosen from this, to the point he was able to slip a third finger in, earning a moan from you. He began to curl his fingers upwards as he kissed and sucked on the sensitive skin of your neck. With the stimulation, you ended up cumming after a few minutes.

As Crewel lapped up your juices again, but gently this time as to not overstimulate you, Sam began to praise you more. "Look at you, doing so good for us, taking us so well. I cant wait to have you coming undone on us." Sam said as he placed a light kiss on your cheek.

Crewel took the rest of his clothes off, leaving him in just his boxers, letting you stare in awe at how well built he was. He took your hand and let you sit in his lap. "Just a second doll, Sam needs to undress himself." He says as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, placing sweet kisses on it. After a minute, Sam was done and was also in just his boxers, guiding you back onto his lap.

"Which hole ya wanna take? Rock paper scissors? No, thats too cliche.." Sam rambles on. "I'm fine with whatever, what do you want, y/n?" Crewel tags into the conversation as he scoots closer to the two of you, holding your waist in the process.

"I'm okay with the position we're in right now, with you being in the front, Sam in the back.. it seems fine like this." The men smile at how genuine you're being, voicing your concerns, ect. Its cute to them. They nod and hum in agreement as Crewel grabs a bottle of lube.

"I reckon I won't have to use this as much as you will, Sam. Take it slow, hurt her and I'll beat the shit out of you." Crewel says with a smile on his face, sort of whispering that last part.

"I am gentle! I'm always gentle, some would even call me a gentleman!" Sam says with a playful scowl, taking the bottle from him. You begin to giggle as you see Crewel slowly take off his boxers, reveling his already, very hard member.

"Sorry love, you looked too cute, couldn't help it, yknow?" He says, giving you a wink as his breath speeds up. You feel Sam shifting under you and you feel him take off his boxers, throwing them to the side.

Oh no, they're both huge! Crewels is long, around 7-8.5 with reasonable girth, while Sams is 6.5 and a lot thicker. How are you gonna take them both at once?

"I know what you're thinking, you'll be alright. We'll take it slow, build up speed with time." Sam says as he places a quick kiss on your temple. He squeezes the lube on his hand, rubbing it together to warm it up before putting it on his cock. Earning a hiss from him, he sighs and places both hands on your waist. Lifting your body up, both him and Crewel line themselves with your holes, and wait for your confirmation.

Placing both hands on Crewels shoulders, you nod your head before they begin to slowly sink themselves into you, stretching you out more in the process. Moans from all three of you fill the room as they lower you down more and more.

Once they are fully in, they both huddle close to your body, singing you praise after praise as they wait for you to let them move. After a few minutes pf being out of breath and simply just panting you give them the go ahead.

"You can move, I'm okay now." And with that, they pull their torsos away from you and place their hands on your waist. Starting at a slow pace for you to get used to it, they slowly and gradually add more speed as they both bounce you on their cocks.

Sam rests his head on your shoulder, panting in your ear as his grip on you tighten and his muscles tense. Crewel doing the same, but while bouncing you, he begins to thrust upwards when you come down to make a larger impact, earning a loud moan that makes you tense around them.

Ssm gets jealous of how Crewel seems to be fucking you better, so he starts to do the same, meeting his thrusts with your timing. You were all moaning messes and by the looks of it, none of you could last very long.

Sam grits his teeth as his hands make their way to your tits, softly squeezing and pinching them. Crewel let's his hands wander to your pussy, taking his thumb and rubbing circles on your clit. You dont last long after they begin to do this, and cum for the third time this night, riding out your high as Sam and Crewel chase theirs.

You can feel Sams breath speed up and grow more hoarse as his grip on your thighs and breast slightly tighten. "Shit shit shi-" a loud groan erupted from his chest as he spills his seed in you. Crewel falling seconds after, cumming in you as he thrusts upwards, keeping it in.

You all lay on the bed for a few seconds, basking in eachothers presence while catching your breath. Crewel slowly pulls out, earning a whince from you. He walks into the bathroom and comes back seconds later with a wash cloth.

"Cmon Sam, you gotta get out." Crewel says as he looks at him, with a whine Sam pulls out too, letting both their juices spill out of you. "Such a good girl for us, keeping all our cum in her. You did so well for us dear." Crewel says as he cleans you up. Lightly dabbing the cloth on your now sensitive areas, he softly chuckles at the way your body reacts.

Sam walks to the other side of the room, going into a small fridge and grabbing three waters and a few snacks. "I've got waters for all of us and some chocolates for the girl of the hour." He says with a wink. Crewel is done cleaning you and goes to throw the soiled towel in a wash basket as Sam opens your water and chocolates.

Replenishing your thirst and munching on the surprisingly delicious chocolates, Sam picks you up unexpectedly and moves you to the front of the bed. "What, you didn't think we were gonna kick you out after this, did you?" Crewel says chuckling as he comes back from being in the bathroom.

"Honestly, im not sure what to expect from you guys anymore." You say with a chuckle. Both men chuckle aswell as they make it into bed with you, sandwiching you between them. Shifting the pillows and blankets around until you're all comfortable, you lay in a comfortable silence.

As you all say your goodnights as the lights in the room turn off, you can't help but think of what situation you're in. Having two men who just fucked you into oblivion now cuddling you goodnight? You could get used to this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: im lorde yaya im lorde yaya

[bitethedustfools]

TWST story idea (8)

Inspired by a certain beast tamer Yuu post from a long time ago. Can't remember the name, sorry.

Yuu got called a beast tamer, but the only beast they have is Grim. Comparing to Kalim, who has a whole zoo, and Rook the Hunter, who has tendencies to attract animals, as well as Riddle with his hedgehogs and flamingos, the title beast tamer should have been handed to either three of them instead of Yuu.

It was a joke. Yuu knew it the moment Crowley called them a beast tamer, perhaps to flatter them into accepting a job or something, but no matter, Yuu is a joke in everyone's eyes.

Yuu is getting sick of getting asked if they have any animals or why they are called a beast tamer and so on. They don't know how to answer those, even if they do, it's not like it's going to improve their situation anyway.

Pissed off and feeling very petty, Yuu decided to tackle this the only way they know how. All those games are not for nothing, and Yuu ks going to put it to good use. Yuu is prepared for this. The time has come, and Yuu will not stand still when they are questioned again.

Yuu is gonna catch 'em all!

Yuu immediately goes on an adventure to snatch some monsters in the wilderness, and what do you know? Yuu is really a beast tamer. The monsters they brought home speak volumes.

"What's that? Oh, I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you over the purring of my gigantic chimera right next to me. Simply put, f*ck off!"

"How did I find Cerberus? I rowed myself to the underworld, you f*cker! Don't you dare call him fake! Go eat him, Cerby!"

"Oh damn. My phoenix set someone on fire. Hey, hey! It's going to be alright, I heard the phoenix is a bird of rebirth. You're going to be fine."

"Yes, I have a griffin, yes, I have a unicorn, a pegasus, a basilisk, and also yes, I have a bunch of normal animals too. You know what I don't have? Thaumarks. Pay up, b*tch. I need to feed my babies."

It goes without fail that a different beast will accompany Yuu and Grim to class, and due to this, it's not that easy to approach Yuu anymore. The beasts are effective bodyguards. There are no more jokes about a beast tamer; Yuu is the real deal now.

The boys could go deal with school and overblots; Yuu is gonna do the equivalent of farm life in the ramshackle dorm.

A different outlook would be instead of taming beasts, Yuu tamed people instead. Yuu is getting sick of these rude people so they decided to make the bullies their 'pet'.

Savanaclaw is the first victim since most unruly and undisciplined students came from here. Since this is a dorm filled with beastmen, naturally, power rules the weak is a norm.

Yuu did something that straight-up made the Savanaclaw students docile and obedient through incredible violence, harsh discipline, and volcano-like anger. The students that followed Yuu were either full of simps or simply out of fear or respect.

Second would be Diasomnia and Yuu obtain them without lifting a finger, believe it or not. Malleus is already wrapped around Yuu's finger since the beginning, if the respected housewarden and heir to the Briar Valley is like this, it only prompted the others to follow Yuu as well. They will treat Yuu like royalty. Simply put, Yuu got the whole package without asking.

…

Couldn't decide who's next. My brain ain't braining anymore. For those who wish to use the prompt, do tag me please. I want to read.

[jessamine-rose]

Yuu Does Not Dream of a Night Bunny College ₍ᐢ⑅ᐢ₎

A long time ago, I wrote Bunny Boy! Leona as a joke. A few months later, I was inspired to write Sea Bunny Boy! Octavinelle and now we have five more bunnified characters....…..welp let’s get this show on the road  ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა

Characters:: Cater, Jamil, Vil, Sebek, Chenya

♡ 1.2k words under the cut ♡

♡ Not many students are receptive to Crowley’s idea for the Night Bunny College Cafe. Cater, however, is an exception. Bunny boys are a popular trend, and what better way to take advantage of the hype?? If executed well, the event will attract lots of guests and, in his case, more likes on Magicam.

♡ Leave it to Cay-kun to be the perfect bunny boy!! In his costume, he is the ideal combo of cute, classy, and daring. The fluffy bunny ears compliment his bright smile, and the fitted black bodysuit brings out the vivid red of his hair. For added flair, his accessories feature a design of red roses and diamonds. And Cater knows how to strike the best poses from finger hearts to the Playboy bunny dip.

♡ Thanks to him, the NBC Cafe’s Magicam debut is a viral success. He manages the account, thinks of good hashtags, and instructs his classmates on how to pose for the camera. The event also benefits Cater’s personal account, as his photos garner several likes, new followers, and thirsty comments.

♡ His charisma makes him popular with customers. Would you like Cater to cast a magic spell on your carrot cake?? He will serve it with extra sparkles and a special pose just for you!! Oh……...you’d like to feed it to him?? In response to that, he will lightheartedly refuse and point at the price list for premium services. Cay-kun can’t be too sweet on you, after all~

♡ Being a bunny boy is the last job Jamil wanted to take. The bunny ears draw attention to him, while the deep red bodysuit and sheer stockings are totally impractical. He is initially awkward at the start of his training; but by opening night, he has perfected the cheerful greetings and suggestive poses.

♡ If there is one thing he enjoys, it’s the change in master-servant dynamics. His customers are the ones who lavish him with praise, who act shy in his presence, who get punished if they dare act out of line. Jamil doesn’t even need to use Snake Whisper. All it takes is a mere glance in the client’s direction for them to fall under his spell~

♡ He enjoys playing games as a bunny boy. Under these circumstances, the customers care less about winning or losing; rather, they prefer to admire Jamil’s concentrated expression. He will smugly win round after round, savoring this opportunity to unleash his full potential.

♡ His fun ends when Kalim arrives. The Al-Asim heir would’ve signed up for the event if Jamil hadn’t insisted that such a role was inappropriate for his status. So instead, Kalim buys out Jamil’s slots for games, photos, and promo services!! Look, he even invited Najma who is all too eager to tease her brother. Jamil can only hold back his exasperation and smile for the camera with them.

♡ It was Crowley and Azul who hounded Vil to participate in the event. Having Vil Schoenheit’s name on the waitstaff is sure to bring in several customers, after all. “Do you know how much I charge for meet-and-greets?!!” “Exactly, Schoenheit-san!! No one would pass up the opportunity to enjoy your services at a discounted price.”

♡ Vil looks drop-dead gorgeous in his costume. The outfit is tailored to his preferences—a violet corset, red heels, embroidered stockings, a stylish updo to suit his bunny ears. He also designs the other costumes according to their respective wearers. Most importantly, he is the demon coach in charge of training his fellow bunny boys!! “The ideal bunny boy should be the epitome of leporine beauty and seduction. I expect all of you to present yourselves with grace.”

♡ He is also strict with the customers. Vil doesn’t accept any requests beyond what is listed in the Bunny Boy Services and Promo Deals. Those who violate the no-touching rule are swiftly reprimanded then kicked out of the establishment. During his slot, Rook can only sing praises for Vil’s beautiful performance.

♡ Admittedly, it is an enjoyable experience. The bunny boy is certainly a new acting role for Vil, and he derives some satisfaction from interacting with his live audience. So long as he is in character, he will perform to the best of his ability.

♡ Sebek makes for an unconventional bunny boy. His sharp fangs and serious glare are more suitable for a predator, whereas the tight black bodysuit emphasizes his muscles. Much to his chagrin, his hair is styled naturally so as not to compete with his bunny ears. His cute, genuine smiles do offer a striking gap moe and, in Azul’s words, an excellent selling point.

♡ He performs his role with great zest, from waiting tables to entertaining customers. As soon as Malleus arrives, you can count on Sebek to run over to him with a large smile and a passionate greeting. “WELCOME TO THE NIGHT BUNNY COLLEGE CAFE!! WE CORDIALLY INVITE YOU TO SELECT A BUNNY BOY OF YOUR CHOICE!!”

♡ Honestly, he doesn’t understand the appeal of the bunny boy. Human culture is perplexing, but the event is a good immersion according to Lilia. His clients make such outlandish requests from photos to board games to……being put in a headlock by Sebek?? Well, so long as they pay for the available services, Sebek will fulfill his duties as a bunny boy.

♡ The customers are just so endeared with him. He makes the cutest expressions whenever they fluster him or feed him carrots, and it’s clear that he takes his role seriously. By the end of the event, Sebek can proudly say that he accomplished his bunny boy training!!

♡ Upon hearing about the event, Chenya secretly visits NRC and raids the dressing room to join in on the fun!! He goes for a crooked pair of bunny ears, a large poofy tail, colorful stockings, and a harlequin-patterned bodysuit. His nonsensical style is a unique take on the traditional bunny suit.

♡ Using his Unique Magic, he sneaks up on customers and surprises them. After revealing himself, Chenya will flash them a mischievous grin and lead them to his own private table where a tea party has been set up. He will entertain them with riddles and games, including a round of Russian Roulette featuring desserts. Can you guess which Bunny Tart has mustard in it??

♡ Soon enough, he gets caught by Riddle and Trey. By then, however, Chenya has a long line of customers so Crowley just lets him be. The carefree beastman enchants all of his clients with a unique experience contrary to what one would expect from a bunny boy.

♡ On and on, he entertains guests to his heart’s delight. At one point, Chenya loses interest in his costume and removes his fake bunny features. Somehow, this transformation attracts even more attention as customers beg to pet his real cat ears and tail. “Nya, riddle me this:: Why is a bunny boy as mad as a March Hare~”

♡

For those who’d like the services of Leona and Octavinelle, their “Yuu Does Not Dream of a Bunny Boy” installments are linked above!!

Fun fact, this has been in my drafts since mid-2022. Hopefully, this is the last time the Twst characters will be subjected to my Bunny Boy! nonsense. I hope y’all enjoyed the bunnification of these characters ₍ ᐢ.ˬ.ᐢ₎

Tagging some blogs who might enjoy this!! @diodellet @wildnya @mobagehelllocal @zgvlt @zariyen @jangmi-latte @merotwst @twstedbeauty @leonakingscholarship @hanafubukki

[silentsneezes]

ive recently become obsessed with g/ood/ o/mens (especially c/rowley) so here’s a little 2.2k cold fic i wrote!

if anyone is interested in exchanging snzcanons/writing prompts lmk! also my inbox is open if anyone has requests :)

with that said, enjoy! (sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors- i only proofread this once)

Crowley had been having a truly awful day; First, he’d woken up with a splitting headache and a throat like sandpaper.

Then, much to his disapproval, he realized that his newest plant had attracted fruit flies.

After spending a good ten minutes swatting at various flies, he gave up, huffing in resignation and making a mental note to buy fly traps. His throat burned too badly for him to yell at the plant, but he assured it that there would be a punishment.

Eventually, Crowley took to sitting at his desk and glaring at the flies buzzing around, slamming a book on any fly that dared to land on his desk.

And - most annoyingly - Crowley kept sneezing. At first, the demon didn’t mind. A few sneezes here and there weren’t uncommon, but it proved to be more than just a few.

As Crowley was snuffling into his sleeve, the black phone on his desk rang harshly. The demon sniffed deeply and cleared his throat, ignoring the painful burning sensation, “Hello?” he drawled, interally cursing the obvious congestion in his voice.

“Hello dear,” Aziraphale’s voice sounded through the phone, and Crowley grinned; he would always be happy to hear from the angel, regardless of how shitty he might feel, “I was wondering if I could ask for a favor,” he explained, sounding sheepish.

Crowley’s surprise was evident as he replied, but his response was genuine nonetheless, “Of course, always.”

As Crowley answered, he felt a faint burning sensation form in the back of his sinuses. He pressed a finger against his septum, hoping to quell the itch.

“Well you see,” Aziraphale started explaining his predicament- something to do with the way his books were arranged- as the burning sensation moved towards the front of Crowley’s nose, making his nostrils quiver with anticipation.

The demon quickly pinched his nose between his thumb and forefinger to squash a sneeze into complete silence, cringing as his vision blurred momentarily. He released his nose, sniffing experimentally and feeling relieved that the single stifle was enough to quell the itch.

“-So I was wondering if you’d like to come to the shop and lend a hand?,” Aziraphale proposed, “I just got the loveliest merlot!”

“Well, I can’t say no to a nice bottle of wine, can I?” Crowley replied, but both he and Aziraphale knew he’d go regardless of whether or not there was wine; as long as his angel was there.

“Splendid!”

Crowley could practically hear Aziraphale’s smile through the phone, “I’ll be there at seven,” he said before fumbling to hang up the phone. He pitched to the side, a sneeze suddenly tearing through him.

“hh’HRRTDSCH!”

He scowled at the spray that landed on his lap, unable to cover in time, “Fugk me,” he groaned.

Crowley glanced at his watch: 5:42. ‘How is it already that late?’ he thought, wondering how many hours he’d spent sitting at his desk in a feverish haze.

He knew that he should start getting ready, but his body seemed to have other ideas. The demon was suddenly all too aware of the way his legs and feet throbbed, even as he sat; his body ached, his nose felt raw, and his head felt like it could explode at any moment.

He groaned, leaning his head against the cool, sleek desk and letting his eyes fall shut. It took everything in him to get up and saunter over to the bathroom.

“hh-,” Crowley’s breath started hitching as he peeled off his shirt, tossing it to the side and tugging off his pants. As he was taking off his boxers, he pitched forwards with a small onslaught of sneezes, “hH’ITSCHH! heHSZCHEW! heh- hh… HRRSCHHh!”

The sneezes left him panting, bent over at the waist with one hand placed on a nearby wall for support. He clambered into the shower, turning it as hot as possible and letting the water run over his face.

The demon rubbed harshly at his nose, which was already red and raw. Much to his dismay, the appendage twitched, nostrils flaring as the itch returned with a vengeance .

“Fu-heh-fuck…hhheH-EHTSHCIEW!”

He cringed at the mess that sprayed against his chest, blowing his nose productively as the steam loosened the congestion in his sinuses.

Luckily, Crowley managed to make it through the rest of the shower without sneezing- which was quite the accomplishment: his colds have always been accompanied with relentless sneezing.

As soon as Crowley stepped out of the shower, he started shivering. He scowled, pulling on a turtleneck and some black pants; he had decided against wearing sweatpants and a hoodie, despite his desire to feel comfortable.

He glanced at his watch again: 6:19

He was in the shower for longer than he’d realized, enjoying the burning heat of the water. Unfortunately, it hadn’t occurred to him that standing in a hot shower for half an hour would only make his fever worse.

He slumped into his seat, rubbing at his temples and removing his glasses. He caught a glimpse of his reflection in a nearby mirror and cringed. He was visibly sick, and he was sure Aziraphale would notice. He considered calling the angel and canceling, but that wasn’t truly what he wanted (what he wanted, of course, was his angel).

“heh-hh,” Crowley’s breath hitched wildly as the itch suddenly returned, head rearing back and nostrils flaring, “hhhehHITSCHHh!” He snapped forwards with a powerful, unrestrained sneeze, barely managing to cover in time, “fugk me.”

After tending to his nose and washing his hands, he grabbed the keys to the Bentley.

The drive to the bookstore went by in a feverish haze. It was rather uneventful, except for the few times when the car was jerked into the other lane as Crowley bent double with a sneeze (or two).

It didn’t take long for Crowley to pull up in front of the bookshop, parking in his usual spot and clambering out. His head spun as he stepped out of the Bentley, and he had to lean against its black frame to stay upright.

Once he was sure he could stand on his own, he sauntered towards the bookshop, pushing the door open and hearing the familiar bell ring. He frowned when he realized he couldn’t smell; he’d always loved the smell of the store, though he would never admit that.

“I’m afraid we’re closed this evening,” Aziraphale called out in response to the bell’s chiming.

“Well, that’s a shame,” Crowley made a beeline for the plush red chair in the back of the bookstore.

“Oh! Crowley,” Aziraphale replied fondly, emerging from behind a bookshelf and grinning jovially. His smile faltered as he took in the demon’s appearance: his nose was red and bothered, his cheeks flushed, and his eyebags more prominent than usual.

As Crowley took a seat, Aziraphale busied himself with the tea kettle- Crowley was clearly in no condition for wine.

“So, what am I helping with?” Crowley asked, his voice raw and gravely.

‘Oh right, the favor,’ Aziraphale thought; He’d completely forgotten about his book organizing crisis after realizing Crowley was sick.

“It’s nothing, really. Muriel just had some free time and decided to reorganize all the books by color coordination,” despite Aziraphale’s annoyance, he still spoke of Muriel fondly; after all, they were intending to help.

Crowley laughed, which sparked a rough coughing fit, caught in his elbow, “S’cuse me,” he cleared his throat, feeling Aziraphale’s eyes observing him closely.

“Are you feeling alright, Crowley?” Aziraphale asked hesitantly, not wanting to anger or embarass the demon. In fact, he wanted to do quite the opposite; it was taking every ounce of self control not to wrap Crowley in a blanket and tend to his every need.

But that wasn’t part of their arrangement. They were simply an angel and a demon, occasionally exchanging favors and enjoying fine dining at the ritz. Except their arrangement had changed. Their dinners often turned into late nights full of dancing, talking, and laughing. They both sensed the change, but neither mentioned it, not wanting to burst their perfect bubble.

“Never felt better,” Crowley replied, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. His statement was undermined as he sniffled wetly, his body determined to betray him.

Aziraphale raised an eyebrow questioningly, to which Crowley shrugged. The angel sighed, deciding not to push the topic any further.

“So, are we rearranging or not?” Crowley asked, gesturing to the color coordinated bookshelves- which, admittedly, looked pretty nice.

Aziraphale hesitated. As badly as he wanted to reorganize his books, it was clear that Crowley was in no condition, “No, no I don’t think so. I wouldn’t want to undo Muriel’s hard work,” he excused.

Crowley was too distracted by a blooming itch in his nose to notice the angel’s obvious excuse, “hh,” despite his best efforts to quell the itch, his breath started hitching. Aziraphale nearly cooed, but he restrained himself for Crowley’s sake.

“hUTSCHHhew! hh-H’GNZTCH!”

“Bless you,” Aziraphale blessed him out of habit, a seemingly harmless act.

Crowley cursed, ducking back into his elbow, “hKISCHHh! ITSSCHHew!”

“Oh dear, bl-,” Aziraphale started, but Crowley cut him off, speaking through a desperate hitching breath.

“St-heh-stopheh- hhHTSCHH stop it with the blessings,” Crowley snapped, followed by an immediate pang of guilt at Aziraphale’s expression.

“I’m so sorry! I completely forgot about that,” he paused, searching for the right word, “peculiarity of yours.”

He learned early on in their relationship that blessing Crowley simply resulted in more sneezing, but blessing people came so naturally to him, he often did it without thinking.

“It’s alright angel,” Crowley waved a dismissive hand.

“Are you quite sure you’re feeling-,” Aziraphale started, but he was interrupted by the wailing of the tea kettle. Crowley was grateful for the distraction. As Aziraphale turned away to make tea, he used his sleeve to tend to his running nose.

Aziraphale returned a minute later with two cups of tea, smiling warmly as he set one beside Crowley.

“I thought you had a bottle of merlot?” Crowley asked, but he honestly didn’t care: wine would likely make him feel worse.

“Yes, well. We can enjoy that another time,” Aziraphale replied fondly, “But I’m in the mood for tea.”

Crowley rolled his eyes beneath his shades, but he tried the tea nonetheless. It soothed his throat, and he took a second sip, feeling his body relax slightly as the discomfort in his throat lessened.

As he continued drinking his tea, Crowley began to realize how truly miserable he felt; he hadn’t had a cold this bad in ages.

He rushed to set down his tea as a prickling sensation formed in the back of his nose. Aziraphale, noticing his hitching breath, placed a comforting hand on his back. Initially, Crowley tensed under the touch, a low hiss escaping him.

“h’MPDzXt” The stifle grated against his sore throat, and did nothing to please the burning in his sinuses.

Aziraphale rubbed small patterns along Crowley’s back, admiring his somewhat toned physique as his breath continued hitching, “don’t hold them in darling,” he instructed, voice soft.

Crowley whined, rubbing harshly at the itchy appendage. Aziraphale sighed sympathetically, “it’s not going to help if you do it like that.”

“St-heh-stuck,” Crowley managed to say between hitching breaths. It was quite the spectacle: his mouth was ajar, eyebrows knit together, breath hitching, and nose twitching. As sympathetic as Aziraphale was, he also found himself rather attracted to the demon, who seemed entirely helpless as he succumbed to the fit.

“hH-IDZCHUw!-ITSXHHh!”

The double came quickly, bending the demon over into cupped hands.

“heh-hRRSCHHU!”

Crowley was left panting and snuffling into cupped hands, unsure if the fit was truly over.

“You poor thing,” Aziraphale scooted closer to Crowley, pulling a handkerchief out of his pocket and tucking it into Crowley’s grasp. One of the angel’s hands settled on Crowley’s thigh, an expression of comfort for the sickly demon.

Crowley accepted the handkerchief, cleaning himself up before resting his head on Aziraphale’s shoulder.

“Why don’t you stay here tonight,” Aziraphale prompted, “I can take care of you.”

Crowley hesitated, his instincts told him to go: a demon shouldn’t need to be taken care of. Aziraphale sensed this and quickly corrected, “plus, I could use the company. It would be a favor to me, really.”

Crowley considered this, knowing Aziraphale was just being courteous. After a few seconds, he sighed, “Alright, you win angel. I’ll stay.”

Aziraphale smiled widely, “Splendid. I’ll get us some more tea,” he made to stand, but Crowley wrapped his arms around the angel’s waist, holding him in place.

Aziraphale blushed, “Uhm, Crowley. Would you mind-.”

The demon cuts him off, voice tired and gravely, “Yes, I would.” He tightens his grip around the angel, burying his face in Aziraphale’s neck and letting the fatigue he’d been fighting set in.

“Okay darling,” Aziraphale agreed, settling in and running his fingers through Crowley’s hair.

It didn’t take long for the demon to fall asleep, and eventually, Aziraphale found himself dozing off as well. They stayed curled up on the couch all evening, the angel watching over his sick ‘friend’ carefully.

that’s all for now! i’ll likely write more for the in/effable h/usbands (im more comfortable writing c/rowley as the snzer, but if anyone has prompts with a/ziraphale, i’d be happy to try)

[profeyandere]

𝐆𝐀𝐁𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐋 ─── ☾ 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐃𝐀𝐘

ʟɪɴᴋꜱ ↪ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ ↪ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴏᴍᴇɴꜱ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ ↪ ᴡᴀᴛᴛᴘᴀᴅ

ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏꜱ ↪ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 2.9ᴋ ↪ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ᴀʀᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇʟ ɢᴀʙʀɪᴇʟ / ᴊɪᴍ x ᴅᴇᴍᴏɴ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ↪ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: ꜱᴘᴏɪʟᴇʀꜱ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ꜱᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ 2

English is not my native language, so I apologize for any mistake and if you can help me improve it, I will greatly appreciate it. I hope you enjoy it :D

"You can't put the supreme archangel on me because you're going for a walk around Edinburgh!"

Your strong and powerful voice echoed between the enormous and high walls of Aziraphale's bookstore, feeling how a wave of heat ran through your body from the tips of your fingers to the highest hair that decorated your head and settled intermittently on it, causing your face to turn a heavy reddish tone as if that were a sign that you were literally about to explode. It was a strange sensation. You weren't even able to describe it in words, but you knew for sure that it couldn't be good, much less because your face had turned that powerful redness that caught the attention of the angel and the demon who had given you convened at the well-known bookstore in the Soho neighborhood. The idea that you were a 'known' demon to both entities did not make you friends, nor did it make you have a close relationship, much less because of what you really were, and that made you an enemy for at least one of them; With the demon, you had forged nothing more than a relationship of respect, but the angels had always been faithful enemies of your kind and you had to avoid as much as possible showing any type of affection or respect for those of their kind. Perhaps you had known Crowley and Aziraphale for longer than you would care to admit, if you also wanted to count the few years you had been working in Heaven with them before the revolution against the Creator occurred, but while you had been in Hell acting like the demon you were, you had lost any kind of contact with the angel and restricted that belonging to the demon because you considered it quite inappropriate to have a close relationship with anyone of your own species, even if they were nice enough to know even your deepest secrets.

"Please, my dear, this is truly important," Aziraphale said, being the brave one who had dared to take the floor after making sure how your aura, completely distorted by the anger you felt, became clearer to him again. Maybe you wouldn't be full of love, demons couldn't feel that in themselves according to earthly gossip, but at least it wasn't something so bad that you were going to explode. "Take care of Gabriel, of Jim, for a couple of days. It won't be long, and before you know it, we'll be here, and you can go back to your routine demonic tasks."

Your flashing yellowish, golden eyes stopped on the chubby figure of the angel, slowly raising your lower lip while a growl emerged from the back of your throat and came out as a soft sigh that was lost in the air. It was obvious how irritable and sensitive you were at that moment as if at any second you could attack them or yell at them in such a way that you would attract the attention of any living being that was inhabiting the face of the Earth.

"Will I also have to babysit the Inspector Constable who has been looking out the window since I entered the bookstore and has followed me here like an abandoned puppy, or will I only have to cover the basic needs of the big guy who is upstairs?" You asked, uncrossing your arms as a heavy sigh escaped between your lips, trying to calm the nerves that both beings had made you. "Furthermore, I cannot perceive him correctly. How am I supposed to take care of him when I can't see him well or my memories are blurred when there's something about him? I didn't even know he was in front of me when I came to tell you about Lord Beelzebub's order."

"Don't worry, my adorable demon, because we have changed a couple of things about the little miracle to make it easier for you to recognize him," Crowley intervened, placing his large hands on your shoulders, squeezing them playfully before gently patting your back to encourage you. "Remember that this is because the little angel has heard some nonsense coming from Gabriel's mouth and has assumed that it has to do with his memory fading."

"It's a clue," the white-haired man stressed as he raised his voice a little more to point out with more force the reason for his early departure from London. "It may seem stupid, but he's been singing that little song all morning, and thanks to my landlord I've discovered that there's a place in Edinburgh that has problems with their jukebox. It seems that, regardless of the song chosen, it always changes to the same one that Gabriel was singing."

You couldn't help but raise a skeptical eyebrow.

"It's not the best clue, but it's something," the redhead murmured, sighing and removing his hands from you, returning to stand next to his friend. "So, we leave you in charge of Gabriel and the bookstore."

"Indeed, prevent people from buying my books, and I will compensate you in some way in the future," the one with blue eyes agreed, making you frown slightly at his words. "Please be very patient with him. He doesn't remember anything."

"I already had patience once in Heaven, I don't promise to be so stupid as to continue being so while I'm on the side of Hell," you murmured, ignoring Aziraphale's look of fear and Crowley's small, amused smile. "Have your adopted child come down, and I'll see what I can do with him."

And what a surprise you were when you finally met up with the missing man shortly after the dynamic duo left the store, who was now Jim, which was short for James, which in turn was short for Gabriel, according to what he said. His appearance was so similar to the one you remembered and, at the same time, so different from the one you had seen him in as if you somehow knew that in front of you was the egocentric and cold supreme archangel who had so often teased you while you were working in Heaven and scolded you as he found you at some point during your stay on Earth, but at the same time you felt like you were inhabiting the library with a completely different person than the one you knew; It was all too strange, you simply didn't have words to explain that. A small beginning of beard had begun to appear on his profiled face, now slightly wider due to the slight weight he had gained in recent days thanks to the large amount of hot chocolate he had been drinking thanks to his repeated requests to Aziraphale since he had tasted that sweet drink, while his clothing was completely opposite to what he had once worn. Now, he seemed homely, a man full of peace and a good angel.

When you saw him, you almost hit him. This happened because you thought he was an evil double twin or something similar, mainly because he was completely identical to his angelic version except for the violet glow in his eyes, which he had not shown even though Aziraphale and Crowley had mentioned that in very moments punctually he seemed to come to his senses when he remembered events in biblical history in which he had been forced to intervene in one way or another; It was as if God communicated with both the angel and the demon through him. Going back to the same point you had mentioned before: Gabriel and Jim seemed to be the same person, only he had no memories of what he once was, and that meant that you now had to take care of a grown man who simply didn't understand how the world, gravity or electricity worked. You didn't understand much about both things either, you had not been in charge of the creation of the planets, and neither had it been in your mind to create the power plants and the distribution of it throughout the houses.

Although your first interactions were quite awkward, Jim made sure of something that he wasn't too happy about, even if it took him a whole day to realize it.

"Why do she keeps avoiding me? If we already know each other."

His voice, low and soft, echoed between the walls of his small room and, although Jim knew that he was with you in that huge store and that it was very unlikely that you would not hear him, he did not understand the reason why you had avoided him so much. It was as if you were afraid of someone or you were seeing a ghost. For him there was no other alternative. Although Aziraphale and Crowley reacted in a similar way upon meeting him, with surprise and slight fear, your gaze on him was different. He could tell by the dull glow in your eyes and your restless fingers that drummed on any nearby surface, as if you had the intention of saying something to him every time you were in the same room. He had seen you before, and not only did he sense it because he had literally done it before, the same day Mr. Fell's friends arrived at the store, but he recognized you from something before. He had seen you before, he had recognized you from somewhere else, and he had had a warm feeling that spread through his chest every time his blue eyes turned towards you as if a wave of sweetness and warmth settled inside him in a very different way than the way hot chocolate did and subsequently exploded in his belly; It was too strange to explain, but he really liked being around you because of the way you made him feel, even if you didn't do anything in particular to make him feel like his body was about to explode into fifty different pieces.

It was such a warm feeling, so nice, that he wanted to have it all day.

Determined to find you and face his thoughts and feelings once and for all, he stood up from the bed with a slight start, twisting his entire body and moving to sit up and finally stand up, ignoring the fact that the sheets that had been around him as he was lying down and fell to the floor with a thud muffled by the carpet. He walked around the upper floor as if the bookstore had been his since he bought it, as if he somehow knew it like the back of his hand and recognized every corner and every step he had to take to avoid knocking over any of the stacks of books that had been piling up as the days went by while Aziraphale and Crowley had been away from London. To his gratifying surprise, a soft, barely perceptible melody seemed to bathe the tent. A male voice overshadowed by a more angelic, sweeter, and more wonderful one caused his heart to jump inside his chest, so he did not take long to walk with impetus and speed towards the place from which said sound came. He knew it was you, deep in his heart he knew it was you. And sure enough, there you were, he hadn't made a mistake. You were sitting in Aziraphale's old chair while one of the books he had been organizing in the morning rested softly in your hands while the time melody coming from the record player made him smile softly knowing that this was the song he had been singing that same day unconsciously.

"Is that the disk that Mr. Fell took this morning?"

The sudden sound of Gabriel's voice made you come to your senses, causing the music on the record to quickly stop and you to close the book in your hands tightly, slowly diverting your golden gaze towards his barely perceptible bluish one. The darkness enveloped him. You could barely make out his masculine features, but you knew that he was there, in that dark corner, watching you. You swallowed hard for an answer, but simply grunted and then gently placed the book on the desk in Aziraphale's office, glancing sideways at the man who had taken a couple of steps for you to see, being as stealthy as the angel had mentioned. He had started thinking about putting a rattle on Jim or something similar so he wouldn't be scared, but you just needed that heavenly and playful sound to be able to disappear from Gabriel's sight as soon as possible; you had no need to see him because of the various feelings he evoked in you and the memories that resurfaced after so many years.

"Mr. Fell took one of the many records that Maggie has," you commented, seeing how his expression changed to one of confusion that deep down caused a feeling of tenderness to appear in you, mainly because she had tilted her head as if a confused puppy would be treated. "Maggie is a woman who has a record store next door. I asked her for a copy so I could listen to it."

"Great, I like it," he murmured before approaching the gramophone to try to find out why nothing was heard if the device was still working. "Why doesn't it sound? Is it broken?"

Your sparkling gaze lingered on his tall, broad Gabriel's body, lingering on the breadth of his shoulders and the scoop of his back, without specifically answering his question. Those had been some of the few words that you had exchanged with him and, although you had noticed his constant need to be close to you to be able to talk or simply be in the same space as you, you were always looking for a way to get out of it, whether it was leaving the bookstore for coffee or hiding in the record store, even transforming into the little bat that your demonic form allowed you and keeping yourself out of his sight by hiding in the darkest and most remote places of the bookstore; It wasn't the best way to act, especially having an amnesiac in your care, but you didn't want to suffer more pain from being around him. Jim, or Gabriel, turned to look at you, and, again, that warm and pleasant feeling settled in his chest. He didn't know what you were doing to him with that look, but he liked it.

"It's not broken. I've just removed the sound," you said before snapping your fingers, and the soft bells that were heard from the song began to flood the room again, causing a smile full of fascination to appear on the man's lips again. "You should be sleeping, Jim."

"I couldn't sleep," he indicated, walking slowly towards the sofa that was in front of the chair you were sitting on, letting himself fall heavily on the furniture before leaning forward slightly and staring at you as if trying to figure out what you were thinking. Thanks to the light of the moon, the stars, and the street lamps, he could see your expression full of confusion and slight irritation. "Why do you avoid me so much? Mr. Fell looks after me, Mr. Anthony looks after me, but you avoid me. Why?" “

I think Crowley does anything but worry about you,” you murmured in slight confusion at his statement. You really didn't expect him to confuse something as different as care and protection from hatred and irritation.

"Why do you avoid me so much? I just want you to answer that question for me."

His tone of voice seemed to be louder and more desperate than before, surprising you for it. For a second, you almost thought that Jim was truly Gabriel, as if from one moment to the next he had completely recovered his memory, but seeing his blue eyes only made you see that he was not there; Whatever Jim was, he wasn't Gabriel.

"Because you're just like someone I knew," you began, swallowing without really believing that you were willing to confess everything to him. "He was the dumbest, most self-centered, and ruthless being he could have ever met, but deep down, he was loving, tender, and caring."

Jim stared at you while you talked about that person he reminded you so much of. The soft smile that rested on your face while you talked about that man, whom you insulted every few seconds but then flattered as if he were the most beautiful creature in the entire galaxy, caused a smile to also settle on his face. He noticed how your shoulders loosened and relaxed as you talked about him, about Gabriel, about how you had met in a place very far from London, where for minutes it seemed only you existed in the immensity of the universe, observing with fascination the stars while others around you saw your close relationship as something disastrous that no creature beyond humans could feel; You described him with so much zeal, with so much affection, that he felt jealous deep down in his heart. "And does this song remind you of him?" Jim asked as he gently tilted his head, watching as you nodded gently and stretched your long legs towards him.

"I like it a lot. I think it is ideal for you."

“Yes,” you stated softly. "Every day, it's a gettin' closer."

"Going faster than a roller coaster," he continued, following the rhythm of the song as it resonated, gently extending his legs on the carpet to touch your completely black shoe with his slipper.

« And a love like yours would surely come their way, » thought an adorable fly fluttering gently above your heads.

[what-if-i-just-did]

Destiel Prompt List 13. Human!Impala ships it.

Trigger Warnings: temporarily implied vehicle theft, mention of fake death, mentions of carseks, mention of internalized biphobia, implied sexy times, using humor to deflect

Baby, Why Haven't You Yet?

"...." "Dean? What's wrong?" Sam said, looking from his brother to the place he was staring at. "Baby's gone." Dean said blankly, like his brain hadn't quite caught up yet. "I parked her right there! I swear." He said, pointing to an empty parking space. "Dean, maybe you're just getting your landmarks wrong. The Impala didn't just dissapear." Sam says, exhausted from the hunt. Witches, man.

"You think I'd just misplace my Baby?! I know where I parked her, Sammy. See? It's two spots away from the grafitti and right next to this double-parking douche. She's gone. Someone stole my Baby!" "Dean, calm down, I'm sure it didn't- uh hi, yeah?" Sammy was cut off when a guy tapped his shoulder. The guy was wearing jeans and two flannels, he had dark hair and he was barefoot.

"Hey." The guy said, in what can only be described as a bedroom voice. "Uhm. Hi? I'm sorry, do I know you?" Sam said. The guy's eyebrows raised. "Well, I'd like to think so. You've only been riding me for years."

Dean's eyebrows raised.

Sam nearly choked. "Uh, Wh-ha??- "

-----

Once the situation was cleared up, it was almost funny. The guy wasn't really a guy at all. He was.. the Impala. Those witch-bitches? Yeah. They magicked his frikkin' car. Dean was not happy. Sam still thought it was kinda funny. When they asked him what they should call him, he'd said he liked it when Dean called him 'Baby' and they should just call him that, and he'd winked, which gave Dean that moment of bi panic he always had which Sam found hilarious.

They'd jacked a car and gone back to the Bunker, where they called Cas, because honestly, what were they supposed to do with this?

They'd started looking for some way to reverse the spell, but with the witches already dead, most ways to reverse a spell were out of reach. Rowena was currently on a stretch of 'being dead' so they didn't call her. (At this point, nobody believed it when Rowena, or Gabriel, or Crowley was dead. There was this unspoken rule though, not to contact someone if they were 'dead' unless it was an apocalypse-size emergency)

Sam piped up about the fact that they hadn't even asked Baby if he wanted to get changed back, and Dean shut him up about it.

-----

Then someone mentioned something about how Dean was such a womanizer and Baby said something that would have some.. repercussions. "Oh I remember that... You haven't had sex in my backseat in quite some time, Dean. It's a shame, I would have loved to see you and the Angel. You have a bed now, of course, but I do miss it."

Baby didn't realise everyone had stopped moving untill he looked up again. "Why are you staring at me? I thought we got past that part."

-----

"What do you mean you're 'not like that'? Dean Winchester I have personally witnessed you being had by more than a few drunken mistakes worth of men in my backseat, don't you dare get biphobic on yourself. Have you and Cas really not gotten together yet? You both love eachother and Lord knows you find him attractive. What's the issue exactly, it's been years for Chuck's sake."

Now everyone was staring at Dean. Who was kinda sorta maybe turning incredibly red and tried to play it off with humor. "Uh. Not cool, Baby. You can't just out someone like that, and add the fact that I'm a bottom. This is betrayal, you know." He said, and nodded.

"Dean..?" Sam tried. "Sammy, just... I know, okay?"

"Dean... " Cas said deeply. "I-.. I know, Cas, I'm sorry, I never-" and oh.

-----

Sam could handle a little making out, but he's fairly sure he was gonna need ear bleach for the sounds that happened when Dean and Cas stumbled to Dean's room, joined at the lips.

Taglist: @ldthegreen

(yes we're imagining John Barrowman as Baby okay)

[reigningqueenofwords]

Let's Make a Deal

Pairing: Dean x Gabby (OC), Reader x Crowley Word count: 1,819

Read on AO3

Part 1 of Father Dearest

Tilting your head back, you downed your third shot. Currently, it was just you and Sam sitting at a booth in the bar. Dean had gone off to fetch his current girlfriend. You hadn’t spent too much time with her, but you just didn’t like her. Simply chalking it up to not knowing her, you had no objections to her tagging along. Seeing movement out of the corner of you eye, you looked over and grinned. There was Dean. You’d been in love with him for about a year now, and while it hurt knowing you weren’t his type, you were happy for him. “Welcome back!” You beamed.

“You guys remember Gabby?” He said as she sat down.

“Yeah. How are you?” You tried to be polite for Dean’s sake.

Her eyes quickly scanned over you, and you knew why. She was thin and pretty. Chances are, she was a cheerleader in high school, and never left that mindset. You? You had some meat on you. Neither boy had ever commented on it, but you were very self-conscious. If you actually took the time to do hair and make-up, you thought you were pretty attractive. Who had time for that in the hunting world, though? Gabby gave you a fake smile, making you tighten your jaw. “I’m good, sweetie.” She said.

“Whey don’t you girls get to know each other, and we’ll go get some drinks.” Dean suggested. You let Sam out and watched them walk away. It was pretty crowded, so you knew that they would be a bit.

“You should probably leave.” She said, your eyes snapping to her.

Raising your eyebrow, you looked confused. “I’m sorry? What?”

She chuckled. “Men that look like that don’t need to be seen with girls who look like…you.” Gabby shrugged. “You’re what? Fifty pounds over weight?” She guessed, her eyes looking you over again. “I also see how you look at Dean. Keep dreaming, honey. He isn’t a chubby chaser. Obviously.” Her words stung. It brought back all the rude comments from school. All the teasing, the jokes, the pranks. “I’d also look into a gym membership.” She added.

You chewed your lip slightly. As you went to open your mouth, you saw the boys returning. Letting Sam in, you gave him a small smile. “I’ll be right back. Just gonna run to the bathroom.” You motioned to the side. They nodded, turning their attention to each other, and their drinks. Holding back tears, you made it look like you were going to the bathroom, but you looped around the bar and walked out.

The motel that you were staying at was only a few blocks away, so you simply walked back. It was a cool spring night, so you weren’t worried about getting cold. Taking a deep breath, you wiped away a stray tear. You had no idea if you were doing the right thing. You had no idea if Dean would hate you after this or not. All you knew was that if you didn’t, you would be the fat friend for the rest of your life, always the target for people like her.

Walking into your room, you shut the door and kicked off your shoes. It was ten minutes before you gained the courage to do what you planned. “Damn it.” You muttered. “Crowley!” You said as loud as you dared. He seemed to have a soft spot for you, so he usually would show up when you called.

“Yes, love?” He asked from behind you. Spinning around, his face fell. “What’s wrong?” He asked.

Licking your lips, you swallowed. “I…I want to make a deal, Crowley.” You told him. “I want you to give me the perfect body.”  Another tear escaped.

He moved closer to  you, shaking his head. “What’s brought this on? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with your body. You’re a goddess.”

“No, I’m not.” You sighed, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Dean’s new girlfriend reminded me of that tonight.” The mention of Dean’s name made Crowley’s face shift from concerned to angry. “She pointed out how over weight I am, how men that look like them don’t need to be seen with girls like me, and that she sees how I look at Dean. Told me to keep dreaming, that he’s not a chubby chaser.” Crowley had moved to pull you into his side as you cried.

Gently making you look at him, he smiled. “I’m going to show you exactly how you should be treated. If that bloody moron can’t see how amazing you are, it’s because he doesn’t deserve you.” He said sweetly. “Will you let me show you how gorgeous you really are?”

After a moment, you bit your bottom lip and nodded. Maybe you just needed someone to hold you for the night, make you believe the words he was saying. Even if when you woke up, reality would set it.

Crowley really did make you feel like a goddess that night. Not once did you feel the need to shy away. He hadn’t even zapped away right after, which was slightly shocking. You two had laid naked, under the covers, chatting. It was nice to relax and laugh. You had no expectations from sleeping with him, and you wouldn’t pretend to. Before you knew it, you had drifted off, snuggling your pillow between  your arms, your head resting on just part of it. He had slipped out quietly after pulling the sheet up to your shoulders.

Once he was sure you wouldn’t wake, he got dressed and clenched his jaw. Snapping his fingers, he popped himself into Dean’s room, which wasn’t too far down the hall. “Hello, Squirrel.” His smooth voice broke the silence around the moans in the room.

The girl that was on top of Dean screamed and rolled off of him, pulling the sheet over her chest. Dean covered himself and leaned on his elbows. “What the hell, Crowley?” He snapped.

“See, for once, my issue isn’t entirely with you.” Crowley shrugged. “It’s with her.” He pointed to Gabby, making her eyes go wide.

“I’ve never even met you!” She yelled.

He shrugged, giving her a ‘whatever’ look. “Ah, but I’ve heard about you.” Dean looked confused. “Don’t look so confused, Squirrel.” He snapped, obviously annoyed. “See, your little fling there? The one looking like she went swimming in mommy’s make up? She said some very hurtful things to Y/N this evening.” His eyes were staring at Gabby. “She needs to be taught a lesson. See, she needs to know what it feels like to be judged negatively by her looks. Well, and that looks aren’t everything.” Snapping his fingers, a grin spread across his cheeks. “Now, you’re going to gain weight. Lots of it. So, you may want to go shopping. Oh! And before I forget, I’d get used to being in the dark.” Turning to Dean, his face fell. “As for you, if I have to comfort her again, you won’t get off as easy.” With that, he was gone.

“What the hell?” Dean mumbled. He slid out of bed and pulled on his boxer briefs and jeans.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Gabby snapped, obviously offended.

He looked over his shoulder. “To see what the hell that was about, that’s what.” Getting up, he didn’t bother with his shirt. He had the spare key to your room, so he didn’t even knock once he got there. Walking in, he stopped dead in his tracks. He did not expect to see you laying naked in bed. Clearing his throat, he shut the door a bit loudly.

Groaning, you stretched. “Crowley, what the he–” You stopped as you looked over your side, eyes growing wide. Sitting up, you pulled the sheet tight to your chest. “Uhhhh…” You looked around, spotting a note from Crowley.

Hello, Love. You were sleeping so peacefully, I didn’t want to wake you. The issue has been addressed. I had an amazing time. If you ever need reminding, you know who to call. -Crowley

Smiling, you set it down on the nightstand. “You slept with Crowley?!?!” Dean snapped you out of your own little world. “Crowley. The King of Hell?” He was pissed.

You held the sheet to you as you got out of bed. “Excuse me?” You were pissed, tear stains still on your cheeks, made more evident by your mascara. “Why the hell do you care?” Shaking your head, your knuckles turned white on the sheets. “Just because you wouldn’t touch me with a ten foot pole, doesn’t mean other men don’t find me attractive. Apparently, Crowley is one of them.” You told him.

“So, what? Are you dating him or something? How long have you been sleeping with him?”

“No. And just tonight. Not that it’s any of your business.” Your cheeks were heating up, between your anger, and realizing that all you were wearing was a bed sheet. “Now, If you’ll excuse me, I think you should leave.” Your voice was calm.

Dean stood his ground. “No.” He crossed his arms.

You looked at him, shocked. “And why not?” You asked, tilting your head.

Licking his lips, he moved a bit closer. “Because I don’t like the thought of that douche-bag touching what should be mine.” His voice held a danger to it, sending shivers down your spine.

“If you cared so much, why go out and bang every Barbie you can get to drop their panties?” You snapped, dropping your own voice. “And why not say anything until now? Don’t want to admit that you’re into a bigger girl?”

He narrowed his eyes. “I didn’t want to push you away!” Dean said, sighing. “I didn’t think that you’d be interested in me. Gabby’s the first girl you’ve seen me date, I fly off the handle easily, and I have a habit of dying. Not exactly the kind of guy you should go for.”

“You’re an idiot.” You teased. “I’ve been in love with you for ages.”

Dean looked shocked. “Really?” He asked, hopeful.

You nodded. “But, I need time, Dean. If anything is going to happen between us, I need time. I can’t jump into anything. Not after tonight. Not after Gabby.” You told him honestly.

“I get it. She’s gone. Walked out when I came over here.” He shrugged, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I’ll give you whatever time you need. Can we just…not let this effect our friendship in the mean time? And no more sleeping with Crowley?” The thought made him cringe.

You gave him a small smile. “I can try. And, don’t worry, it’s not like I plan on jumping into bed with him any time soon. So, now that that’s settled, can I get some sleep?”

Dean chuckled. “Yeah. Night, Y/N.” He said, kissing your forehead before walking out. That was an unexpected night.

[tickledpink31]

What would happen in an alternative universe that Minako's parents are alive? They somehow survive the explosion, so how would that impact the story?

Two big differences is the lack of survivor's guilt from Minako's end and much more needed support when her curse rears its ugly head for the first time.

Yes, Minako still suffers from the curse. She's bound to as someone with magical powers and incredibly emotional. The curse also tends to have an effect on the temperament of its victims. Don't forget that she lost her paternal grandmother too, which happened weeks before the explosion that killed her parents. They still move to grandma's house at Grimmauld Place because... well, their old house is kaput. Minako is still sent to RSA and accidentally spirited away to NRC because of the incident at Hogsmeade.

Assuming that Flora and Takashi are mostly intact from the incident, they're the most sound people Minako can listen to other than Flor and Alexis. The parents take on most of the responsibilities that Flor did in the other universe, including going with Ambrose to look for Minako when she has disappeared.

Oh, and you thought Flor was bad? Who do you think inspired the fury of the Nezumi sisters? It's Flora! She's the original flavour! She would not apologize to Ambrose for getting furious with him. Takashi went along for the search to act as the mediator because he knew Flora wouldn't work very well with Ambrose alone.

I kind of feel like the Nezumi siblings, especially Flor, would try to convince their parents to go to Twisted Wonderland with them to help. If anything, they'll need another experienced mage on their side that is young and fit. Not to mention that the parents are Muggles and are still floored by the concept of magic. Flora and Takashi would have argued with their children for an entire week if they weren't so pressed for time.

Crowley is a dead bird once Flora and Takashi meet him. "HOW DARE YOU TREAT OUR DAUGHTER THAT WAY? I'M BOILING YOU IN OIL, YOU UNSEASONED CHICKEN!"

Surprisingly, Flora is quite charmed by Crewel. She thinks he's charismatic. Flor is just seething, asking Minako and Flora how they are related.

Takashi is amazed at just how many boys Minako has managed to attract. It makes him a bit nostalgic, since his wife also attracted lots of men even today. However, his protective dad instincts kicked in when he saw the local eldritch in a uniform (Malleus) standing outside Mugglesworth and when he found out about the sleepovers she has with Adeuce. He's surprisingly scary for someone so mild-mannered.

[denaphoenix]

Me too, girl. Me too.

But also...

Uhm... those tags be seriously wildin'.

Like... how do you correctly comment on these?

My initial instinct was to slide into their dms to assure them that both David and Michael are perfectly capable of kissing guys. But that feels weird.

So I'm doing this instead... (seriously feeling just as weird about that though. Like... there must be a better way. I just... ah fuck it)

Because, dammit, someone needs to make a post about David and Michael being great actors that I trust completely to properly portray ancient queer repressed love. In part because of their filmographies and in part because of what they've already done in Good Omens.

I mean, take one look at Crowley's pathetic attempts at sitting on furniture or the swing of his hips and tell me he's not the epitome of a snakey bicon. Plus, I've SEEN David Tennant kiss guys in all sorts of contexts, and he's done great! (fuck, I still feel like a creep right now. But someone has to say it. I did not explicitly seek for "David tenant kissing guys" btw... there are gif sets. They're educational.)

And while all I have seen Michael do in the lines of kissing guys was a quick peck (and a weird amount of sex scenes), the man has a frankly staggering range of gay characters, and after having seen those, and watching the man reenact that scene from the graduate where Mrs. Robinson seduces Benjamin ( which, btw., has been a truly transcendental experience) I will never doubt Michael Sheen's ability to do anything at all. And as a side note, just look at his eyes and tell me he's not VERY capable of portraying queer attraction. Plus the ox ribs... never forget the ox ribs.

So when it comes to the kissing thing, we're going to be fine. If they want to give us a transcendentally romantic kiss, they are going to. There will be no "kissing like straight guys" in the Sheen-Tennant household any time soon, trust you me.

But also... "yet another"!? I don't know where you were for that first kiss, (where, by the way, they did kiss "for real"), but if that kiss said to you "these people are so obviously straight", and not the CLEARLY SPELLED OUT "I'm going to aggressively and violently communicate 6000 years of pent-up emotions with my very inexperienced mouth and body because my words seem to not be getting through and I'm in physical and emotional distress over it and I simply need to cling on to this one moment for as long as possible because ending it will end it all" on Tennant's side, and the conflicted response of "oh fuck, how fucking dare he, oh damn, this... I want this so badly that it hurts, but I'm also currently feeling a thousand conflicting emotions most of which are stabbing into my mind like knives, and how fucking dare he, oh God, oh, not God, oh no, oh fucking hell, oh..." continued by non-verbal queer ache on Sheen's... then... did we watch the same scene?

I'm so glad we have Michael as Aziraphale... :')

[solomonish]

Proxemics (TWST - Ace/Reader)

@makialene suggested: Only if you have a minute (and want to of course, I know you’re busy with the February writing challenge!), but I love how you write Ace, do you think you could do something for what may have happened if we had said yes when he asked to share the bed with us the first night he stayed over? In canon we kick him to the couch but I’m a sucker for the “only one bed” trope

lol i only meant for this to be like a 500 word ficlet but here i am with 3.3k .......i also like the bed sharing trope ig!! i know this request was from the beginning of february so hopefully the length makes it worth the wait hehe and! don't forget to check this out on ao3! (it was fic length so of course i'm posting it there)

feel free to leave a suggestion~

Throughout your (admittedly short) time in Twisted Wonderland, you began to learn that, sometimes, the best answer to give people was no answer at all. This wasn’t because you feared the repercussions of your words - no, most of the people you met were so harmless despite their best attempts to appear tough it was almost silly. No, you learned not to answer because of how goofy these people could be. Most often, the most appropriate response was a flat expression. Somebody needed to be a voice of reason in these people’s lives, because you were beginning to think none of them ever had one prior to you.

Grim seemed to have the same idea, staring at Ace with an amused expression, paws on his hips. The both of you passed a flickering glance towards the other, a silent ‘can you believe this guy? No, I can't either,’ before Grim finally spoke up.

“So, the point is you’re both terrible?”

Ace visibly recoiled, the faux woe-is-me expression from his tale of the stolen tart leaving his face immediately. The indignation that replaced it was worse on your dwindling patience. “You don’t think that it’s insane for my magic to get sealed away for eating ONE slice of tart?! For a mage, that’s like having your arms and legs bound and shackled! And there were three tarts! It’s not like he could eat them all himself. Come on, you KNOW this is messed up!”

Your eyes drifted to the collar. He couldn’t have chosen a comparison that was more on-the-nose. Heaving a heavy sigh, you removed your hands from your hips and instead grabbed your chin thoughtfully. Though you and Ace had a rather short friendship, he was pretty open and you felt as if you had a good grasp on his personality already. Of course, he was a natural troublemaker - although, perhaps in Crowley’s eyes, so were you. Ace’s impulsiveness was a tad endearing, but he wasn’t quite sly enough to escape the consequences that always came. Part of you wondered if he was purposely testing the limits so he could figure out how to make his clean escape every time.

Still, despite knowing how he attracted trouble, you knew his Housewarden’s punishment was extreme. Besides, was there really a reason to make an example out of Ace when he was the only one who’d dare eat food that wasn’t his? The longer you thought about it, the more excuses you could come up with.

Finally, you nodded your agreement. “It does seem a tad extreme.”

“Riiiight?!”

“Yeah, but…if there were three tarts, they were probably for a party. Maybe it was someone’s birthday or somethin’?” Grim reasoned, jumping from the floor to the coffee table so he could be a bit more on your level. With a proud grin, he immediately began preening himself. “Lookit that! I’m, like, a master detective too!”

“A birthday party, huh…”

“Did you even apologize?” You asked. Ace stuck out his tongue, and that was answer enough.

“Man…I thought you’d be more sympathetic. I’m a victim of tyranny here!”

You nodded noncommittally. “He may have been a tad extreme…”

It was Grim’s turn to be offended. Was there any winning for you in this world? “But you stole food! That ain’t cool!”

You agreed with Grim, one hundred percent. Even if you were in a separate world, you were pretty sure moral codes were more or less the same, just that those around you didn’t seem to care much for them. But still, basic roommate etiquette had to be a thing, right? Ace didn’t seem like he wouldn’t know one of the cardinal rules of sharing a living space - did he not have family members, ever?

However, Ace was your friend now. Even if you had gotten off to a rough start - one that might have only been 48 hours ago, or maybe 48 weeks ago, the chaos was making it hard to tell - it was clear now that he was a pest but still a ride-or-die. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t warm up quickly to him. Besides, if this world was as villainous as you suspected it was, you didn’t want to chase away one of your only allies in the whole place.

“If you apologize, I’m sure he’ll forgive you,” You offered. Neither of them look particularly convinced.

“You don’t go messin’ with another man’s meal…” Grim muttered. Then he perked up, his tail and flaming ears all on high alert. “Hey, wait a minute! I just realized I never got those cans of tuna the headmage promised me!”

After a few moments of your steady glare, Ace finally conceded. “All right, all right. Fine. I get that I should apologize. But you’re coming with me. This was your idea after all.”

If there was one thing in this world you had the advantage in, it would be general manners for sure. “Oh, I’ve got this. Don’t worry.”

Matching your confident grin, Ace gave you a thumbs up before scratching the back of his head. “Anyway…you got a place for me to crash tonight?”

Oh. In the insanity of his most recent adventure, you had entirely forgotten about his original predicament. Grim did too, if his yelp was any indication of his emotions. “You were serious about that? Outside of the bedroom me and Yuu use, this entire dump is buried under a foot of dust. So if you wanna crash, you better start cleanin’!”

“Dude, no way! I hate cleaning!”

“I don’t think many people like cleaning…” You added softly. That was a mistake, because Ace’s attention was immediately focused on you.

“Just let me stay with you!”

“What?!?” Your voice involuntarily cracked. Clearing your throat, your eyes darted around the room. Grim looked displeased with Ace’s audacity, though the entire conversation seemed to just frustrate him. Your eyes wandered behind him, to the ancient, dusty couch, and the spot where you thought you could see the shadow of a spring poking out. “You mean, like, in my bed…?”

“I’m real slim. I won’t take up any space!” For emphasis, Ace put one hand over his heart and the other up in the air like a scout taking a pledge. Your gaze flickered between him, Grim, and the couch, each person (or object, or…cat?) giving you a different answer. Though you thought a million different worries would be racing through your head, you were only lingering on one single thought: why not take a page from Crowley’s book?

The headmage only harped others on his generosity to toot his own horn, but you did feel incredibly lucky to be given shelter in your time of need. Why not pay the good deed forward? Besides, you were growing weary of this conversation and being awake in general. Dealing with Ace’s complaints was the last thing you wanted to do. Besides, it wasn’t like you’d never slept in the same bed as a friend before. Where was the harm?

“Okay.”

Both Grim and Ace widened their eyes. “R-really?!”

You shrugged. “The bed’s big, Grim. And there is…a lot of dust in here. We’d be just as cruel as Riddle if we made him sleep on the couch when it’s in such sorry shape.”

A draft brushed over you, and you shivered. The ghosts would surely have something to say about you insulting their furniture. Grim was displeased too, muttering under his breath but still making his way to bed, clearing throwing in the towel. Ace took another second to snap out of his surprise, but, once he recovered, gave you a more genuine smile. If you looked closely, you would have realized he was almost flustered.

“Thanks.”

Yawning, you gestured for him to follow you up the stairs. They groaned loudly beneath your feet, but you were beginning to understand the difference between weak wood and loud wood. “It’s no big deal. Do you have nightclothes? I think I have an extra set lying around…no guarantee they’ll fit though.”

“Nah. I came prepared.” You looked back and eyed the small bag you hadn’t noticed before.

“Confident in your persuasion skills, are you?”

“Maybe I just find you particularly dependable.” The two of you chuckled as you walked into the bedroom. Sleepily, you instructed him to change in the bathroom and quickly changed your own clothes. When you were done and sat on the bed, you absently ran a hand over Grim’s back. He was already asleep, and didn’t even stir at your hand running over him. You should’ve asked if he was alright with sharing the bed - with how often he wound up curling at your feet, it was basically his space, too. He didn’t seem too bothered with the idea, though, if he was already sleeping - and as an uninvited guest himself, he didn’t really have much room to complain.

It wasn’t until Ace walked back in the room after a quiet knock that you began to feel nervous. To avoid his gaze, you pretended to set an alarm on the clock (that miraculously still worked and was accurate - the ghosts again? Magic?) Ace rounded to the other side of the bed, and you could feel his hesitance in the slow movements he took to lift the blankets. Unable to stall anymore, you followed his movements, making sure to keep plenty of space between you and him.

“Well, you know where the bathroom and the kitchen are. Good night.”

“Uh, yeah. Night.”

Silence quickly filled the room, and you had to fight not to focus entirely on the body a foot away from you.

—

Maybe the couch would have been better.

Ace never spent much time sleeping in such close proximity to somebody. Any time he spent a night at a friend’s, they usually had a makeshift bed for him already. He never even had to share a room, let alone a bed. There were inherent boundaries he could figure out for sure, but knowing that there was another person behind him but not knowing how much wiggle room he had was a different type of stress he wasn’t prepared for. Not to mention, it had only been about ten minutes since they settled in for the night. There was no way the prefect was asleep so he could test the waters a little, yet his shoulder was already starting to protest the way he was laying.

Uncomfortable position aside, Ace was pretty sure the prefect only agreed to let him in the bed because their couch had visible springs coming out of the cushions and a thick layer of dust. The dust was hardly any better here - what wasn’t on the bed was in the air instead, already making his nose uncomfortably stuffy. No wonder the prefect was always so sniffly in the morning. There was also a spring getting ready to push through the fabric of the mattress, just beneath his ribcage and digging into him. If he had been on the couch, he could have sprawled out however he wanted to avoid it! But, instead, he was stuck in a bed with someone, terrified to move.

Ace wasn’t sure exactly why he was so afraid. The prefect was cool, and would easily brush off an accidental bump in the night. But while he was changing in the bathroom, Ace reminded himself to knock before entering the bedroom and suddenly got a pit in his stomach. He couldn’t for the life of him figure out what had his guts tied up in knots - or, he could, but he chose to ignore it lest it get worse and become another hurdle for him to jump before falling asleep.

Sleep. By the seven, he wished he could just fall asleep. If he were unconscious, he wouldn’t have to deal with so many stupid thoughts!

His side began to tingle, growing numb from the acute pressure the loose spring was putting on him. That was the final straw. Ace had to move, lest his entire right side go numb before he even got an hour of sleep.

Tentatively, Ace shifted closer to the center of the bed. He was surprised by how much ground he was able to make, pushing the boundary to see how comfortable he could get. Of course, he quickly overshot the available space, stopping cold at MC’s sleeve barely grazing his own arm. Quicker than intended, Ace forced himself to the very edge of the bed, gripping the edge of the mattress to prevent himself from following. The bed moved with him, and he squeezed his eyes shut, hoping desperately the prefect wouldn’t ask him what he was doing. Seconds passed, agonizingly long, before he slowly relaxed. They were letting him get away with it. He could work with that.

Hanging on to the very edge of the mattress wasn’t ideal, but at least the spring was no longer making his body numb. Ace could sit like this for a while, at least until the prefect fell asleep and he’d feel more comfortable moving around. Goodness, he knew he wouldn’t take up much space, so why was he suddenly so wary about where he was laying? He should just sprawl out and show the prefect who’s boss, since they were so harsh on him after he told his story.

But then they might think he was a creep, or worse, a rude bum, and that weirdly stung.

So Ace stood still, barely breathing as deeply as usual to avoid shaking the bed any more than he already had. For a moment, he debated listening in to see when the prefect fell asleep, but that immediately felt invasive and he scrapped the thought. Maybe he could fall asleep like this? He could hardly be held accountable for how close he got trying to get comfortable in his sleep, right?

Ace battled with himself for a while, feeling pathetic all the time. He was caught between cursing himself for placing himself so willingly in an awkward situation, and cursing himself for making a situation awkward that didn’t need to be. But, at the end of the day, he knew he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep like this. If it wasn’t the fear of falling off the bed that kept him awake, it was his thoughts running a mile a minute. Ace stayed stuck to the edge of the bed for what felt like forever. The prefect was asleep by now, right?

He had to sneak a peek. He had to. If the prefect was still awake, he’d just say he had to…go to the bathroom! Or, better yet, he’d excuse himself for a drink from the kitchen, only to dash out of the house like a madman and grovel at Riddle’s feet for forgiveness. Then, when the prefect accused him of running away in the middle of the night, he could accuse them of having vivid dreams about him and fluster them so badly, they wouldn’t pursue the train of thought any longer.

Bracing himself, Ace pushed himself up with his forearms and dared a glance behind his shoulder.

Almost immediately, he sighed in relief. The prefect was asleep, having shuffled a little closer to the middle of the bed in their sleep. At their feet, Grim was curled up peacefully, the fire in his ears flaring lazily and a little dimmer than usual. Carefully, making absolutely sure he didn’t wake anybody up, Ace shuffled himself a little more inward and carefully lowered himself on his back. The spring was no longer digging into him, and like this, the bed was almost comfortable. At the very least, he wasn’t curled in a horrible position trying to avoid something jabbing into his side.

However, there was one small hitch in his plans. He could feel the prefect next to him, not quite touching but definitely warm and solid beside him.

Gulping, Ace folded his hands over his stomach and stared at the ceiling, trying to calm his thoughts once more. It was fine! Nothing was happening! Just a couple of pals sharing a bed in a pinch. Nothing was weird about it unless he made it weird. And if it was weird, the prefect readily agreed, so he had some ammunition on his side! He just needed to calm down and fall asleep. Nothing would happen if he could just sleep.

—

Ace did manage to fall asleep soon after finally settling down. Still, when he awoke to somebody pounding on the door, he couldn’t fight the feeling that a few more hours would have been nice.

Blinking, Ace eyes the streams of sunlight with vitriol, as if each dust particle swirling around had personally offended him. After a moment, he realized that neither Grim nor the prefect were stirring. He wondered if he could just ignore the door, but their guest seemed awfully persistent. Groaning, Ace threw an arm over his eyes, wanting just a few minutes more to rest. Even if the bed was old and had a spring that wanted his blood, he felt surprisingly warm.

His mind took a few more seconds to catch up with his situation. Oh, how harsh reality tended to be.

The prefect had turned towards him in their sleep. That would have been fine, if they hadn’t also taken to leaning their head on his shoulder. Because of the bulky collar, they had to position themselves at a lopsided angle, practically nuzzling into his shoulder. If he wasn’t warm from the blanket and morning sun, the flustered blush heating his face and turning it red as his favorite pie was sure doing the trick.

Without thinking, Ace pushed himself out of the bed, unable to spare a second to prevent the prefect from waking up. Before anybody could ask any questions, he bolted out of the bedroom, his heavy footsteps loud as thunder with the brunt of his weight and the groaning wood. The stairs were worse, but he ignored them, practically jumping off the last few. When he opened the door, he was out of breath and still trying to bring the blood down from his face. Deuce stood outside, fist raised to continue his incessant pounding on the door and an eyebrow raised. Ace hated how different they looked, with Deuce neatly in his school uniform and himself still in rumpled bedclothes.

“I thought you might- why are you so out of breath?” Deuce asked. He peered into the house, perhaps wondering if the dust was strangling Ace. Without knowing how to respond, Ace opened and closed his mouth a few times before deciding silence was best. Unfortunately, Deuce had a rare intelligent moment and connected the dots Ace wanted to keep far apart. “You didn’t-”

Immediately, Deuce narrowed his eyes. A shiver ran down Ace’s spine - since when could little Deucy be so scary? “Woah, Deuce, let me explain- ack!”

—

You were awoken by a sudden force against your stomach, knocking the wind out of you. Somebody - Ace, you remembered belatedly - ran to the door, which seemed to be losing a battle between it and somebody’s fist. A minute later, your alarm went off, and you groaned. It wasn’t an ideal start to the morning, but you had worse before.

Then Ace started screaming, and you realized Deuce was in the house. Okay, maybe this was going to be a rough morning.

You pulled yourself out of bed and trudged to the top of the stairs, hoping to separate the two before they broke your house even more than it already was. However, both boys stopped fighting and stared at you the moment the steps creaked beneath your feet. Something about their bewildered expressions stopped you from speaking. You watched Deuce’s eyes flicker between you and Ace.

“What, is it my beadhead?” You asked through a yawn. “I know it’s a lot, but it isn’t…oh.”

Realization hit you like a truck. Ace sunk to his knees, probably wishing he could sink into the floor and never return (a sentiment you shared the longer Deuce stared at the two of you, seemingly deciding whether to beat up Ace or lecture you first). This morning was turning out to be the roughest in a while, and you’ve only been up for five minutes!

Ace was definitely sleeping on the couch next time.

[penofpenguin]

Hellooo!!! ❤️❤️❤️

This is my first time requesting hehe

Can you do a one shot of Ruggie x fem!reader (non-mc)? The reader is 2nd year, and can be in whatever dorm you want :DD

Reader (Ruggie's lover) is a very rich spoiled brat. She's all about being a fashionista, and living the fancy life. She boasts and gloats about her being rich to everyone. But never to Ruggie. He is an exception. She loves him dearly and would never dare to judge him. She also has a high ego.

So here's the scenario: Everyone in NRC was getting tired of reader's snarky attitude. And they all complain to Ruggie how reader is being a brat to them and begs him to talk her into being nicer. He understands and tries to talk to her later on. But, due to reader's very high ego— she doesn't listen to him and they begin arguing. With Ruggie having enough with her attitude, he snaps at her and ignores her for a few days. Until reader has finally learned her mistake, she tries to apologise to Ruggie (You can write how they make up in this scene :D) And can you add in the ending— a short scene of where Ruggie tries to teach the reader to be nice :>

So sorry if this is long. I hope you get it, this idea has been in my head for so long now😭

Welcome to Tumblr requesting anon :DD

I am more than delighted to do this request it is absolutely wholesome sjjsjs. Hope you like this one! I didn't mention any dorm so you can get creative.

Content Warnings: You're mean, Homeless child mentioned, Violence mentioned but not taken in action, Angry Riddle

Ruggie tries telling his spoilt!s/o to tone down on the entitlement.

Ruggie x spoilt!F!reader

Enjoy!!

You had it all.

Money, money and money. You were really rich and got everything that you wanted. A pony? yours. A castle? yours. You got what you wanted every single time that you descended into entitlement.

You probably got into Night Raven College because of the money and bribes Crowley accepts.

Even if you thought you were the popular girl, everyone hated you...but one.

Ruggie Bucchi. Ironic isn't it?

A spoilt rich girl like you who gets what she wants on her fingertips and a poor guy from the slums like him who works multiple jobs a day.

What attracted him to you was the way you treated him. You had a soft spot for Ruggie and you treated him like he was in the same financial level as you.

Many people were truly surprised how someone like you and someone like him were even possible, but they carried on with it.

Everything was going fine...until Ruggie heard a knock on his door.

"Yess I'm cominggg"

He opens the door only to find a raging red Riddle Rosehearts, visibly breathing heavily, next to his dearest girlfriend, who had a collar on, huffing in annoyance.

"Yes? Y/n what did you do?" Ruggie asks with a sigh.

"OH I'LL TELL YOU WHAT SHE DID! SHE-"

"It isn't a big deal. He bumped into me on purpose! So I shoved his books to the floor and told him to pick it up." You said, rolling your eyes as Riddle visibly grew redder.

"DON'T YOU DARE INTERRUPT ME!"

Riddle turns to Ruggie.

"Control...your girlfriend here please!!"

"I'll see what I can do. Could you just please remove the collar? I promise she'll learn something." Ruggie asked.

Riddle hesitantly removed the collar, glared at you and took off. Ruggie invited you to his room.

"Now...Y/n...don't we wanna...y'know...tone down on the-"

You threw yourself onto him.

"Wuggieee. Thank you for saving my from the small angry troll my knight in shining armor I love you so much here I got you a donut on my way~" You said giving kisses to his cheeks, which were now red.

"A donut!!!?? Thanks!!" He completely forgot what he was gonna say, but he remembered afterwards.

"Y/n...uh...can we talk?"

"Sure what's up?"

"So...Riddle complaining was actually the 4th complaint I got from you today. You know I can't keep backing you up." He slowly put his arms around you and pulled you into a nice snuggle session.

"I don't get why they're all reacting so much!! It's not my fault! They're the ones causing problems,"

"No...uh...even I think you've been acting a bit too much lately."

"Oh you make me laugh my dearest!"

Ruggie placed his finger on your chin and turned your face towards him.

"Y/n, I'm not kidding."

A moment of silence passed. He just stared into your eyes. You slowly tried pushing him off but his grip was pretty strong on you.

"Why're you letting these people get to you! You know I'm not thaaaat bad." You said giggling.

"I mean...people will get sick of i-"

"No Ruggie! I'm not listening!!!" You shouted, pushing his arm off of you. You hated it when people told you what to do.

"Y/n, please listen-"

"NO!" You pushed him off his own bed. He eventually had enough.

"Fine!! Get lost for all I care!! Im done sticking up for your spoilt behaviour!!" He yelled. You were shocked, but you just rolled your eyes, opened the door and slammed it shut.

The next day you were slowly starting to miss him. You go to your class corridors and see Ruggie there, looking sort of frustrated.

"HI wuggiee!"

No response.

"Wuggie?"

He didn't even look at you. He was on his flip phone, possibly ignoring you. He walked away to his magic history class, without saying a word.

'Is he giving me attitude?? Fine then!!' You thought. You grumpily walked away to your own class.

2 days passed since your fight and you didn't get any text messages from him either. Not any "I love yous". No "Good morning/Good night". The only response you got was 'seen' to your recent messages.

You wanted to talk to someone. You tried approaching Yuu to talk about this but they just ignored you(plus grim stuck his tongue out to you). You were finally understanding your mistake.

"Im sorry Ruggie" You messaged him. Once again, 'seen'. That was when an idea came to your head to apologize for him.

The next day, Ruggie went to class to find an envelope on his desk. He opened it to find some money and a letter.

"Meet me on the Courtyard at lunch. I need to talk to you about something. It's important so please be there."

Ruggie's first thought was that it wasn't you. Was someone was trying to confess to him now that he hasn't been talking to you? Did they also think money would help (it would lmao). But he decided to go anyways.

He went to the courtyard only to find you, sitting there. He was about to go back but you grabbed his sleeve.

"Im actually sorry!"

He didn't face you, but he stopped trying to walk away. You continued.

"I realized what I did wrong. I let my ego get the best me. I treated you like you weren't special. I know you didn't like that. Over these three days, I was so heartbroken and...and I felt so lonely. I fixed things up with many people by getting them something from the cafeteria...and I made something specially for you. Just follow me please?"

Ruggie turned to face you with a stoic face.

"Go ahead."

You took him to the woods and showed him a perfectly layed out picnic, with all of his favourites(which is everything that isn't rotten). Your man was drooling.

"I hope you like it." You said. The next thing you know you were being hugged and lifted off the ground.

"This- This is a week's worth of food!!"

"Really? For me this is only lunch."

Ruggie ignored your comment and snuggled onto your neck, giving slight kisses here and there.

"Your apology is accepted! But...please be a bit nicer. I'd really appreciate it."

"Alrightt! Anything for my Wuggie!!"

Ruggie just cringed.

"Look I missed you alot...but I really did not miss that nickname."

You laughed.

"Ok Ruggie."

"Much better,"

You two enjoyed your lunch together, with him being done with most of the food in around 5 minutes.

Bonus:

"Ok...y/n...you bump into a homeless child and it starts crying. What do you do?" Ruggie was giving you a small lesson on being nice during a walk around the school.

"Tell it to scram?"

"No!"

"Step on its foot?"

"Great Seven you're hopeless-"

I hope you enjoyed this one anon and everyone else!! I wasn't expecting so many engagement activity in these days so thank you everyone 😭😭😭

I've also been sick (dehydration ugh) for a few days which is why I didn't post much. But if you requested, it will be done soon. Take care and have a nice day 💖💖💖

-Madeline 🐧

[queermarzipan]

Alpha Beta O (That Frat Boy Fic) by The_Serpent_of_Edam — this is. I have. No words. Oh my god. Just. Read it. It's not Omegaverse I promise just. READ IT. Human AU, SUPER FUCKING GOOD, the first time I read it I reread it immediately

Slow Show by mia_ugly — this has been recced by several people already, because it is part of the holy trifecta of Good Omens Fanfic. I'm here to add that AFTER you've finished it, read the fanfics people have written of this fanfiction. At the very least, some faith (the slow show fandom remix) by attheborder, curtaincall. It's SO funny.

Demonology and the Tri-Phasic Model of Trauma: An Integrative Approach by Nnm — I've already recced this to you, but. I have to. It's SO GOOD. Also part of the Trifecta. !!!!!!!READ!!! IMMEDIATELY!!!!!! Okay not immediately just when you have time bUT!!! READ!!!!!

If Not Now, When by ineffablefool — Ace Omens! Human AU! The author refers to "Crowley's slow destruction" in the notes in reference to his feelings for Aziraphale! THIS IS SO GOOD. SO. FUCKING. SOFT. YEARNING. AUGH

Pray For Us, Icarus by Atalan —DO NOT READ IF YOU DON'T WANT TO CRY YOUR EYES OUT. I'm serious happy ending but SO MUCH ANGST YOU WILL BAWL. I am only daring to include this because your only qualification this time was that it be a favourite. This is the third arm of the trifecta. Or, well. The third one I read. Because I didn't want to cry. I gave in eventually though :,D

What We Make of It (Shotgun Wedding) by charlottemadison — THIS THIS THIS OH MY FUCK. This is the only time I've ever seen the canonical Arrangement integrated into a human AU. Because. Well. Obviously. BUT THIS AUTHOR MANAGED IT. So. READ. Set in the United States of America; no prior knowledge of such is required to understand the fic. Crowley and Aziraphale are still, of course, English.

stalwart sun, wily moon (Heist AU) by dustnhalos — I CRIED. I CRIED OF FUCKING LOVE AND PARALLELS AND HEALING AND. FUCK. FUCKING HELL. The author is looking to drum up enough attraction to justify a second printing of the PHYSICAL BOOK yes there has been a physical book yes it is BEAUTIFUL. Read ittttt

Rough Enough for Love by Nekhen — FAKE DATING SOFT DOM AZIRAPHALE CROWLEY WHO CRAVES SOFTNESS MORE THAN ANYTHING. WHAT MORE COULD YOU ASK FOR. AUGUGHHHH. Human AU

Fiends With Benefits by VerdantVulpus — Book!Ineffables and Show!Ineffables meet across universes. Much more potent if you have read the book. (Read the book, Asmi.) VERY HOT. VERY FUCKING FUNNY.

as you find the string to strike within me by jadzias — look. Look. I am aware that I'm a slut for hypnosis. I know. I know this about myself. BUT READ IT. OKAY. JUST. READ IT.

The Garden of Delights by ZehWulf — BDSM human AU of my fucking DREAMS. Read the tags, stay safe, et cetera, but if you're not put off PLEASE READ OH MY GOD. This series is AMAZING.

Demon and Angel Professors by Ghostinthehouse — 200-part series, 666 words each, EVERY SINGLE ONE is SO FUCKING. <33333. LOVE. AUGH. Left ambiguous whether it's human AU or they both just decided to become professors. It's great.

And That's the Way You Do It by ZehWulf — Incredible. I don't know how they managed to make this premise funny AND sweet AND too hot for words, but they did and now it exists and it's tagged Crack Treated Seriously and it is on my 'Gold' bookmark tag for a reason. I love this.

A sweet world by NohaIjiachi — The sweetest thing ever written by a human being. I swear to you. Read it to restore your faith in the power of making bread with your hands paired with sweet soft love.

i just realised, the fandom adopted you AFTER the divorce! 😔 do you want some fic recommendations?

Yep, they did. How lovely of all you maggots.

YES PLEASE. I BELIEVE I'M NOW GETTING ADDICTED TO GOOD OMENS FANFICTION. Anyone? Just reblog this or reply with your favourite GO fics.

(and no sad endings. no.)