#but hopefully I made some decent points along the way

[dallaji]

Control Freak.

♡ bada lee x reader / NSFW❗❗❗

SUMMARY: Your girlfriend doesn’t like giving up the reins, but perhaps with some gentle urging she will finally let loose. Even if it's just for a little bit.

WORD COUNT: 4.7k

CW: PORN WITHOUT PLOT (like leech rallay NO plot), established relationship, reader is a power bottom and bada is perplexed!! befuddled!!11, bada with a strap, toys.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: please don't kill me for not releasing a request. (〃´▽`〃) this has been in my drafts for a while, so i decided to finish it. kind of experimental / out of my comfort zone, but hopefully still enjoyable!!1 not proofread yet btw.

————— ୨୧ —————

Bada always needed to be in control.

You had noticed when you first met her.

That particular club had never been on your radar before, but your friends dragged you along and the crowd and music were decent enough. It had only taken fifteen minutes of you dancing around strangers, the heavy bass of the music controlling the sway of your body, until a pair of magnetic eyes met yours from across the room. 

Something about her beckoned you, the anticipation blooming in your stomach. Even when her arm had snaked around your lower back, signaling to any passersby that she had staked her claim, Bada couldn’t help but glance over to her friends every once in a while; making sure they weren’t going overboard with drinking. Before she took you to her place she checked in on each and every one of them, her hand never leaving your lower back.

When Bada had invited you to watch one of her dance classes, you immediately picked up on her ability to command the room. When her students performed the taught choreo back to her, Bada's eagle-like eyes searched for any out-of-place formations or unsharp movements. If anyone was off the beat, she would make them redo the entire routine start to finish. Not in a draconian way, but with words of encouragement, only ever wanting to see them give their very best.

You noticed again on one of your first dates. After offering to cook for her that evening, Bada insisted on tagging along with you to the grocery store. She had wricked the basket from your hand straight away with a half smile. Without even needing to, she reached any tall shelf regardless. 

Once settled in your small one bedroom apartment, Bada had lurked over your shoulder with curious eyes like a patient puppy, watching you prepare the meal. Before you could even ask, she handed you whichever utensils or ingredients were needed. All that despite your constant urging to have her sit back and relax.

Instead, Bada shook her head with a bashful smile: “I want to help.” Is what she had said.

You noticed in more private settings, too. 

Whenever she made you orgasm, she would lock your legs in place and deliberately hold down the thrashing of your limbs. Bada wanted to feel you lose yourself to her, and never make you forget who got you to that point.

Her hungry gaze didn't leave your face, as if she needed to commit every expression to memory. “That’s it, baby,” She’d coax, “So good for me.”

When she wore the familiar harness with her strap-on, she immediately had you bent over in a perfect angle; a hand on the back of your neck to keep you exactly where she wanted you as she pistoned her hips against you. As soon as you got close, she would pull out with a giggle, only to move you onto your back; hoisting your legs over her shoulders to see how far she could edge you along.

Sometimes you wanted to return the favor: “Let me make you feel good,” You would whisper against her lips, Bada panting underneath you as her hands found purchase on your hips. 

Despite her unwavering dedication in keeping you pliant, you were desperate to give back to her. So you would throw a leg over her waist in a foolhardy attempt to lock her into place, and Bada followed your every motion with a lovestruck expression.

However, once your fingers pressed into her, half-lidded eyes meeting yours, her hand would curl around your wrist: sometimes dictating your motions, and sometimes just to keep a tight hold on you. A silent reminder of who is in charge.

And despite this clear-cut dynamic in the bedroom, neither of you ever cared for strict roles. It wasn’t something you had ever explicitly discussed. You worked her up just as much as she did you. Some days you were both desperate for it, one shoving the other against a wall after a long week of barely getting to see each other; other days the two of you giggled under the sheets, the early morning rise peeking through the blinds as soft pants filled the room. 

Yet the outcome was always the same. Completely surrendering yourself to her as she, almost obsessively, found new ways to have you exactly the way she wanted you.

You didn’t mind, though, as it was so inherently Bada. Soft, yet capable; kind, but forthright; sometimes shy, though always poised.

But sometimes, you wondered.

After a particularly stressful day, she would lay you down on the bed and put on her strap without you even imploring her to do so. Wearing her harness, she could sometimes come from just watching your eyes roll back as she fucked into you, the suction on the back of the strap rubbing against her mound at just the right angle. 

Other times, you pushed your hand down her harness, fingers circling her folds in an attempt to keep up with the unforgiving pace of her hips. 

But most of the time, she would hold your hands over your head or against your back, and intently watch you come undone, not paying attention to her own pleasure whatsoever. 

It almost seemed to be cathartic for her, having such a control over you when her grueling schedule was something she simply underwent. When her professional life had become hectic, she barely found the energy to say ‘no’ to things. She would come to your place with tense muscles and a tired smile, but never too tired to pull you into the bedroom with a meaningful look in her eyes. You were more than willing to give her that release. What were you if not at her disposal?

But you still wondered. You believed that, from time to time, it was healthy to let go of the reins. Perhaps finding a way to relinquish at least a little bit, allowing herself to unravel in your hold, could help her blow off steam too. 

You had an idea, and what better time to try it than today?

Bada had started her day with an early photoshoot and ended it with a filmed interview. Once she had reached your apartment, you already had takeout food laid out on the table for her. She greeted you with a warm embrace, pressing a tender kiss on your lips before digging in.

With a mouthful of fried rice, she complained about unfriendly hairstylists and bad traffic, rubbing at her temples to will away a commencing headache. You listened intently before sharing your own frustrations with a project at work; Bada squeezed your hand, urging you to take a break from time to time. You chuckled at the irony. Look who’s talking.

“I have a day off tomorrow,” Bada said nonchalantly, scooping some leftover slices of beef into her bowl.

“Good thing I changed my sheets today.” You replied teasingly, stealing some of her beef.

Bada looked up at you with a mischievous grin.

Soon after you were on your bed entirely naked, panting and sensitive all over, as Bada hunched over you in nothing but her underwear. She had been teasing you relentlessly, dragging her fingernails up and down your thighs as she scattered hickeys across your skin, tonguing at each bruise she created.

"Tell me what you want, princess." She mouthed against the soft skin of your inner thigh, before her teeth pressed down in a lovebite. 

"Want to get fucked," You managed to rasp, your fingers tangling into the locks of her hair.

She hummed thoughtfully, as if she was deciding on what to eat for dinner, and you felt the reverberations against your skin: "It has been a while, hasn't it?" Her tongue licked a long stripe along the area where your cunt and thigh met, her fingertips squeezing into your quivering legs; holding them still.

It was difficult to stay focused with Bada winding you up as much as she did, but you managed to find a stable enough voice to speak: "I- I want to try something new, though..."

"Oh?” She glanced up at you from in between your legs, her mouth slick from the kisses she had left all over you.

You nodded timidly, slowly moving to sit up. Bada followed suit, watching you curiously with her hands resting atop your thighs.

From your bedside drawer you pulled a small box, quickly opening it and placing the contents on the bed. Bada raised her eyebrows.

It was a small pink bullet vibrator, and a remote.

You watched Bada do the math in her head.

“Do you want to have both…?” You almost choked on your spit, flustering not only at her suggestion but the way she seemed incredibly interested in the prospect.

“No! I want you to… wear this, while also wearing your strap,” You muttered, feeling more embarrassed by the second. Bada’s mouth formed a small ‘o’, and you continued hurriedly: “I think it would feel good, for the both of us.”

The way Bada smiled was almost cheshire-like, and she slowly pushed you down on the bed again, a newfound eagerness in her ministrations that let you breathe a sigh of relief. “Does my baby think she can handle it?” She spoke with a cloyingly sweet lilt to her voice, and you had to swallow the bratty remark on the tip of your tongue. 

Of course Bada could not conceive of herself not being able to handle it- she was still under the impression that you would be the main receiver here.

Before you could think of something to respond, Bada placed the remote and the vibrator in your hand, pressing her lips into the crook of your neck.

“Go ahead. Put it in.” She whispered, and all you could do was obey with an eagerness that left you mortified.

As her lips parted against the sensitive skin of your neck, the tip of her tongue drawing circles, your hand moved into her underwear; you rolled the bullet along the front of her heat, fingers reaching to feel the wetness of her folds. Bada hummed encouragingly, her own hands clinging onto your hips. 

You moved further down, coating the bullet with her wetness and letting it aid you when you slowly pushed it into her entrance with the tip of your finger. It earned you a soft moan from Bada, who let out a shuddered breath against your collarbones.

Before you retreated your hand, you made sure to cup her into the palm of your hand, fingers gliding along her folds. You loved how wet she got, and so fast at that. 

She sucked in a breath at your lingering touches, the sound turning into a mocking giggle. “Are you trying to tease me?”

You shuddered at the silent threat that hid behind her words, and shook your head bashfully. You promptly removed your hand, and Bada clicked her tongue in feigned indignance; but her eyes were still glazed with affection.

It was part of the game the both of you played, but you were still intent on reversing the roles at least a little bit.

Her hand came up to grab a tight hold on your face, fingertips digging into your cheeks as she forced you to meet her in a kiss. You made a desperate noise, immediately parting your lips for her as she kissed your breath away, tongue prodding against yours. 

But she ended the kiss much too soon for your liking, and you chased after her mouth. The taller girl chuckled, pushing you flat against the bed a second time by the grip she had on your face. “Patience” is all she said before moving off the bed and rummaging through the drawer for something familiar.

The strap is a similar bright pink as the bullet, and your shuddered in anticipation. You were always mesmerized from the way Bada stepped into the harness. Everything about her body language alluded to how often she wore it; she hoisted it up and expertly tightened the belts around her hips. Bada was lean, yet soft in all the right places, and the way the straps of the harness hugged around her figure complimented the subtle formation of her abs.

Nothing was ever lost on her, so Bada shot you a lopsided grin when she noticed your hungry stare. She stalked back over to you, much too patient for your liking, and climbed back to her rightful spot between your legs. You held your breath as Bada sat up on her knees, her hands curling under your thighs before she tugged you closer to her with an almost predatory look in her eyes.

She manhandled you in place, and you leaned back on your elbows in surrender. 

Her eyes raked along your figure underneath her and she leaned closer; the cold strap pressing against your navel. You subconsciously ground against it, but Bada was just beyond reach for there to be any satisfying friction.

She tilted her head playfully, a hand coming up to cradle the side of your face: “Do you want my fingers first, or can you take it?” 

You sucked in your lower lip, bringing your hands to the firmness of her stomach. “I can take it,” You responded confidently.

She hummed quietly: “Of course you can,” The look Bada gave you almost turned you into putty, and she pulled your leg around her waist, tilting her hips in such a way that the near end of the strap pressed to your folds. You wanted to rub yourself against it, but you knew better than to defy Bada in a moment like this.

Her other hand moved in between the two of you and she felt at your wetness, just as you had done to her prior. Bada, however, didn’t hesitate before drawing circles against you, your head lolling to the side with a sharp breath. She brought the strap lower on purpose, digging it between your folds before coating it with your arousal, slicking it up. 

You tried to stay still, but every slight roll of her hips had you jump at the sensitivity and you squeezed your eyes shut. That only made it worse however, as Bada took the opportunity to begin gliding the strap up and down against you, relishing in the shudders of your body. You weren’t looking, but you knew she was smiling.

She pressed a wet kiss to your collarbones and brought her hand to the base of her strap, angling her hips at your entrance. Teasingly, she prodded the tip of the strap against you and you were almost certain she was going to drag this out until she hoisted your hips onto her lap; pushing into you without a warning. 

You gasped, clutching onto her waist as you felt the strap stretch your walls. The glide was familiar enough but you couldn’t help but feel full already. You loved the way she stuffed you.

With murmurs of encouragement, Bada grabbed a hold of your hip to push in all the way to the hilt with a sharp jerk, and the movement punched a moan out of you. You clutched onto the sheets as you spread your legs further apart, and Bada greedily crowded over you.

She pulled out until just the head of the strap was still buried in you, and gave you barely a second to breathe before slamming back inside. You dug your nails into the skin of her waist with a drawn-out whine.

The pace she set was immediately ruthless; a slow retreat before punching into you, her hip bones knocking against the back of your thighs with a slapping sound. Soon you became slack jawed, almost feeling drunk on pleasure. Bada’s hands had found purchase atop your breasts, squeezing them as her hips fucked into you, your nipples peeking from between her slender fingers. 

“You take it so well,” Bada groaned, teeth gritting as she accelerated her thrusts. “It’s fucking amazing.” 

If you hadn’t initiated this with a clear plan in mind, you could feel yourself come incredibly fast this way: Bada dominating you, who was so open and willing. Your head lolled to the side as the sound of skin on skin got louder.

Through the daze of pleasure coursing through your body, your hand managed to find the remote belonging to the bullet buried inside Bada. The taller girl didn’t notice what you were reaching for, much more focused on fucking you faster and harder. 

Your fingers somehow managed to find the ‘on’-button, your body rocking back and forth as Bada fucked you, and you pressed on the first setting without warning.

Bada faltered with a curse on her lips as she felt the vibrator set off, hips momentarily freezing. She was still buried deep inside you, and you gasped. You could feel the light pulsing of the vibrating as well, and the thought made you lightheaded. 

Bada found her footing again fast enough, an incredulous laugh falling from her lips. She brusquely grabbed a hold of your face, forcing you to look at her as she stared down with fiery eyes. She slipped back into her previously unforgiven pace, almost as if she didn’t feel the vibrator at all: “You do want to— tease me.” She stated, cooing, but almost interrupting her own words with a moan as the vibrator pulsed inside of her.

You shook your head despite the grip she had on your face: “No,” You moaned breathlessly, fighting the urge to meet her thrusts because it would surely get you to your orgasm much too fast. “Jus’ wanna see you come…”

Bada groaned at your words, leaning down to meet your lips in a messy kiss that was more tongue than anything else. She angled her hips sideways, hitting into a spot that she knew could drive you crazy, this time being no different. You moaned into her mouth and she swallowed greedily, the pace of her thrusts turning faster as you felt the vibrations through her strap.

It felt so good it was dizzying, but Bada still clearly had the upper hand here, and that was not how you wanted this to go.

You moved the vibrator one setting higher. 

Bada almost keeled over at that, pressing the palms of her hands at either side of your head as her lips parted in a silent gasp. Once again her hips stuttered against you. The vibrations were stronger now: you felt it well enough through the strap buried deep inside of you. 

You watched her intently through half-lidded eyes, hands moving to her hips with the remote still in your hold, tenderly caressing along her sides. Her eyes fell shut and she wetted her lips, hips jerking in small motions as she zoned in on the pleasure. Soft gasps were slipping from you at the shallow thrusts, but you did not dare to make her go faster or deeper. The sight hanging above you was much too beautiful.

Bada snapped out of a daze, as if she could read your mind, wild eyes meeting yours. With a tight hold on your thighs, she tugged you impossibly closer to her; her body falling on top of yours, chest to chest, and then she forced her strap deeper into you with a sharp thrust of her hips. You let out a shocked gasp, ankles crossing over her lower back as she hit the spot that made your toes curl. You could feel the vibrations even stronger now, and it seemed Bada was well aware.

“Should I make you come like this? With me staying still?” There was bite to her tone, and you mentally cursed yourself for the lewd moan that fell from your lips as she gave another thrust. You had to actively fight the urge of grinding down on the strap. You knew that, if you did, you would lose this game.

Bada rested her forehead against yours as she remained frozen, watching your every expression, but you noticed her breathing growing heavier by the second.

It was the sign you needed to press the button again, activating the second-to-last highest setting of the bullet.

“FUCK!” She hissed, burying her face in the crook of your neck as her hips flinched immediately. 

You could hear her whine, a sound you rarely ever heard from her, and your mouth went dry. 

You brought a hand to the back of her head, keeping her in place as your legs remained tight around her waist, heels digging into her lower back. The vibrating was maddening for you too, already feeling a red hot tension building up in your lower stomach, and you knew well enough from alone time how strong the third setting on the remote was. 

You could tell she was still actively trying to take charge, but the soft pants against your neck betrayed her true state. Bada began thrusting in small motions, trying to get back to fucking you, but she was so clearly oversensitive from the bullet between her legs that every motion came with stutters.  

While rubbing soothing circles into her scalp, you felt her thighs clench together. Bada’s hands gripped onto the sheets, and the messiness of her thrusts became all the more apparent.

Still, you wanted to push her further.

With the hold your legs had on her, you maneuvered Bada onto her back in one swift motion. She gasped in surprise and you groaned when the strap hit deeper into you, the buzzing of the vibrator sending chills along your spine.

You sat up with an arched back and looked down at her. In turn, Bada was already staring up at you with wide, frantic eyes; her face entirely red and bangs sticking to her forehead. Her lips were parted, and even though she was entirely bewildered, the adoration was easy to read from her expression. She was looking at you as if you were the only person in the universe, almost all her bite from earlier gone.

In a last ditch effort, her hands came to grab a hold of your hips but before she could start thrusting up into you, you turned on the final and highest setting before dropping the remote next to you. 

You could see her eyes roll back, her hand coming up to cover her mouth. She was gritting her teeth, and from the way you pressed down on top of her you could feel the vibrations even clearer. With your palms pressed right above her breasts, you began to fuck yourself on her strap, your back arching even further as the pleasure ran through your body. 

Bada squeezed her eyes shut, uncharacteristically motionless under you and still hiding her moans under her palm. You promptly wrenched her hand away from her face, pinning it next to her head and you didn’t know her pupils managed to become impossibly bigger.

“Let me hear you,” You whispered on top of her, and with a particularly hard thrust you dropped your hips down on her, making Bada’s body shake.

With that encouragement, you opened her floodgates. Her thighs squeezed together below you, and the moans that began spilling from her lips were completely obscene. She was jerking her hips once again, but no longer in an attempt to fuck you into submission; instead, she was frantically chasing after the unbearable pleasure. 

Bada did not know what to do with her hands, one of them clutching onto your hip for dear life as the other balled into a fist next to her head. You angled your hips a bit differently to reach the spot that spurred you on, deftly bouncing on the strap and fucking yourself to completion.

Bada was no longer closing her eyes, staring up at you half lidded as if she never wanted to forget the sight of you on top of her. You, similarly, found her completely irresistible. Bringing your hand to her chin, you pressed your thumb to her lower lip and Bada immediately took your digit inside her mouth. 

She was clearly in a daze, intoxicated from her ecstasy, because she was barely able to suck; instead dragging her tongue messily along your finger through short moans. You dug your thumb into the hollow of her cheek, and with that Bada involuntarily jerked her hips with a groan, punching up into you. It felt as if electricity ran down your spine, and you almost felt yourself orgasm right then and there.

Her hand came up to curl around your wrist, keeping your hand in place as her eyes threatened to fall shut at how overwhelmed she felt; the buzzing of the vibrator seemingly getting louder and louder as the both of you got closer to your release. The redness of her cheeks had cascaded down to her collarbones and her eyes were uncharacteristically wet.

You pulled your thumb away, Bada whining at that once again, but you instead grabbed a hold of her face; your wet thumb smearing her own saliva across her cheek, keeping your pace on the strap steady.

“You wanna come?” You asked softly, the delicateness in your voice betraying how much of a novice you were to this dynamic.

Bada, who still seemed to be coming to terms with the switch of your positions, could only nod, though her eyes said it all: she was completely desperate.

You began gyrating your hips at that, spurring yourself closer and closer to your orgasm with heavy pants. You were feeling the familiar coil in your lower stomach, and your body was begging for release.

“Come with me,” You pleaded, and Bada tightened her hold on your wrist as she took your index- and middle finger into her mouth, moaning deeply around your digits.

Something about that sight did you in. With a few more hard drops of your hips, the sound of your ass slamming down onto the top of her thighs filling the room, you came hard. 

You dropped your head with a loud moan, fireworks coursing through your body and thighs shaking from the exertion of keeping yourself steady on top of her. In tandem with your orgasm, you felt Bada jerk violently underneath you.

She threw her head back, a silent moan stuck on her lips as your fingers slipped out of her mouth, but her grip on your wrist only tightened. Her knees came off the bed, and soon enough she was panting from the overstimulation of the vibrator still pulsing inside of her, while you were still grinding out your orgasm on her strap. 

You had half a mind to grab the remote, your own motions coming to a halt when the sensitivity became too much, and turned off the bullet.

With a lot of effort, you managed to hoist yourself off the strap; hissing at the loss of fullness. Then, you dropped yourself next to Bada, who was trying to catch her breath, thighs absentmindedly rubbing together as she could still feel the phantom sensations of the violent vibrations from the bullet.

Bada turned her head to look at you, and before you could say anything she leaned over to kiss you deeply; head tilted and lips parted. Your hand came up to cradle the side of her face as her own arms circled around your waist, pulling you close to her.

“Thank you,” She muttered against your lips, her voice laced with something deeper as she scattered lazy kisses along your jaw, and you hummed in contentment. 

“How are you feeling?” You asked, your fingers blindly searching for the belts of her harness. 

“Tired…” She murmured, and you had to bite back a laugh. Now she knew how you felt after each time she had her way with you. 

Finally, you found the straps of her harness and began to unbuckle them, helping her slip out of it. Subsequently, you lowered your hand down her panties and Bada huffed a breath, still sensitive. 

You promptly removed the bullet and fixed her underwear back in place with a pat right on her crotch, purposefully forcing a reaction from her. She gasped once again, playfully glaring at you- or at least, attempting to do so. The taller girl was already on the brink of dozing off by the looks of it.

“Go to sleep,” You whispered, enveloping the both of you in a blanket with a final peck to her mouth; Bada pursing her lips a beat too late.

“You’ve got something else waiting for you in the morning…” Bada slurred with her eyes already shut.

[akutasoda]

Hii! How are you? I hope you're well!

I have a request,,, Roommate with Aventurine collage au if possible? Reader recently just bought a house but can't really support themselves so they ask one of their friends if they want to move in with them with a few agreements, none of them want to since they already have a place to stay not until Aventurine comes by.. Reader close friends? Are they even friends? Wait of course they are. Aventurine tell reader he wants to move in with them. What? Well I guess there's no other opinion since reader money is tight.

Atlas Aventurine finally moved in with them, it's a bit surprising considering that he's rich.. why would he want to move in with reader anyway? Ahem thing has been great.. a little to great reader was wondering why they never received any electricity bill that they need to pay along said with water bill.. it turns out Aventurine already paid both of it without reader knowledge since he will definitely get scolded... But what is this? Aventurine? Holding them close.. huh? Confusion came to reader. Aventurine never been this so love affection, unless.. no way right?.. they never thought they might end up falling in love with Aventurine. They're just friends.. now way this can happen. Oh well.. maybe begin in relationship with Aventurine isn't bad after all.. right?

This ended up longer than I expected HELP 😭 I'm craving for angst.. but probably need to stop before I start digging my own grave 🚶 I am not ok 😇 it can be fluff, angst comfort.. or just some wholesome love story.. reader is gender natural 🫂

history hates roomates

synopsis - you decide to room with someone you barely knew but you become very well acquainted, almost too well

includes - aventurine ft topaz + ratio

warnings - gn!reader, college/modern au, maybe ooc, fluff, slight crack, slight angst towards the end, wc - 2.7k

a/n: im doing well! hope you are aswell!

college seemed great. you had been accepted into your ideal collage and had made some great, hopefully lifelong, friends. however, the only issue was that you needed to look for a place to stay for the rest of your course. getting to and from college was becoming more hassle than what it was worth as you didn't take up the initial offer of dorms, but now you were deeply regretting that decision. you had spent hours scrolling on the college's website looking at the dorms in hopes of someone putting out a request for a roomate but nothing ever seemed to come about.

in honesty, you were getting tired of constantly looking for places to stay that reduced the amount you needed to travel - you cursed yourself for not taking up the dorm offer when you first got accepted. a sigh escaped you as you were getting bored of searching and decided that it might be better to turn in for the the night but one listing caught you're eye. it was a decently sized house, designed for student stay as the college would sponsor some similar places, that was within a walkable range of your college, it seemed almost perfect if the pricing wasn't so steep but you were desperate at this point so you contacted the lister and showed your interest just in case someone decided to take it before you could - maybe tomorrow you could ask a friend to go halves?

---✩

even as you walked toward your first class of the day, all you could think about was who might be willing to go halves with you on the place. hopes weren't exactly high as it was quite pricey on it's own but in contrast to some of the dormitories it wasn't that bad! your brain was practically on autopilot as you walked into your class and sat down at your designated seat.

maybe if one person wouldn't be willing to go halves, you could ask two friends? however, the more reasonable part of yourself knew that most people either had dorms or were fine with how they got to college daily. you were so engrossed with thinking of a solution that it barely registered that topaz, and numby, had sat beside you.

numby caught your attention first as topaz used that opportunity to pose the question 'everything alright over there? you seemed pretty lost in thought'

to be honest, nobody knew how topaz managed to have numby by her side at all times on campus, some rumours were that she simply paid the headmaster. it was to be expected that not many people wanted to be sat next to the whitette in class with numby always being there, fortunately you weren't all that fussed with the critter - it became rather adorable after a while. so sitting next to topaz had let you become extremely close with her and eventually friends.

'well it could be better' you eventually responded 'i finally found a place near enough to the college but it's rather expensive, kind of need someone to room with'

numby perked it's head and topaz hummed in acknowledgement before adding 'i'm sure you can find someone, ask around a bit and see'

'i only found it last night so i haven't had the chance to ask yet, but i will' you paused before realising 'would you room with me?'

'as much as i would love to, i've got my own dorm here but you shouldn't have a problem finding someone else' she plastered an almost guilty smile on her face 'sorry though'

a small sigh escaped you 'no it's fine, im more at fault for not taking up a dorm originally'

the door to the class opened and you both watched as the professor walked in, topaz leaned over and whispered 'i'll come find you at lunch and we can talk about this later', you nodded and she nodded back.

---✩

your class finished slightly earlier than normal and so you decided to wait outside of topaz's class for the last couple of minutes. while you waited you decided that it might be a good idea to have another look to see what else might've been listed and double check that the lister was still holding the accomodation for you - they had been very generous so far and you didn't want to test their patience and make them wait too long for a final answer, mainly because they're probably was a handful of students also eyeing up the place.

luckily topaz hadn't made you wait too long and you three walked to the normal spot that you'd hang out at. topaz sat opposite you and immediately she demanded to see the place you were looking at.

'defiantly worth finding a roomate for this place, it looks pretty decent for it's price, as steep as it may be' she scrolled through the details to confirm and take a final look at the images, even numby was looking over her shoulder doing small jumps in agreement.

you huffed slightly 'but who would be a decent roommate? it's not like im asking for a lot but im going have to see them everyday and every night until i graduate' you wish that your situation was a bit more fortunate, that way you wouldn't have to find a roommate and just rent the property for yourself.

topaz smiled 'yeah some roommates aren't the best but again, im sure you could ask another friend who doesn't have anywhere?' she watched as your expression made you seem extremely fed up and she only laughed 'i know i know, it's not that simple'

she handed your phone back and paused before adding 'i could always put some words out in your favour, some people i know haven't got anywhere'

'like me?' both you and topaz turned your heads to the approaching blondette.

'i wouldn't wish that fate on anyone' topaz sneered at him

he feined a small laugh 'you're words hurt me but surely im not that bad?' he turned to you and smiled 'so what about it?'

you were shocked at his straight forwardness, he hadn't even seen the property yet, and how did he even know you were looking for a roommate specifically? you weren't exactly jumping at the idea to room with someone who was practically a stranger to you either.

'not to be rude, but rooming with someone i barely know is quite bold, surely you must understand that' you glanced quickly over to topaz who was practically glaring daggers at him.

'i do understand that but any friend of topaz is a friend of mine, if she can get one thing right it's a decent taste in friends' he smiled at topaz and she looked ready to punch him.

you did know that aventurine was an accomplice of topaz, you weren't to sure if they were friends or not though. in honesty, he was a safe bet for a roommate. like topaz, you knew he was quite wealthy and so he could always pay his half of the rent and on time which would be ideal but again, you barely knew him and surely he could afford his own accomodation by himself?

'look, i can see your hesitation but i promise that i'd be an ideal roomate and i could even pay more than my intended dues if you wish?' aventurine looked all too happy for you're liking but really what other choice would you have, you doubted that you could find another roomate anytime soon, it was a gamble but maybe it'd pay off?

'alright fine but surely you'd like to see the property first?' you posed and he shook his head

'im sure that you chose a great place, just send me the details later and when you plan on moving in, tomorrow's more ideal yes?' he paused and then added 'topaz can give you my number' then he simply walked away with a wave goodbye.

---✩

true to his word, you sent him the details later that night and before you knew it, you were stood outside your new accommodation the very next morning. it felt a bit like a fever dream honestly, the accommodation that seemed idyllic was now where you'd stay until graduation but at the cost of rooming with someone who you barely knew - topaz didn't exactly help with her telling you that she wouldn't room with him for all the money in the world.

aventurine arrived shortly after you did, in a car that clearly had a personal driver, he greeted you with a smile and when ypu asked him where his stuff was he assured you it was arriving later and he wanted you to have first pick on your room. it still felt rather surreal to you but you tried pushing those thoughts behind and tried to be more grateful about finally having accommodation more convenient to the college.

and even a week later he was true to his word, aventurine was an ideal roomate. almost too ideal. you were yet again hanging with topaz and numby at lunch and she was very curious as to how much longer you could fair with him as a roomate but to her surprise you could only give positives.

he was always very considerate of your space and anything you owned, he would make for surprisingly good company and was just overall, extremely easy to live beside. the only downside you could think of was that it could still be a bit awkward between you two when talking but considering that you two were practically living together, it was expected to become easier as even after a week it felt much better than before.

although, recently a concern has a risen that you may be behind on your rent and bills. nothing had arrived in the mail and it was worrying because you didn't want to be kicked out, so you reached out and asked just to be told that they'd all been paid. a split second of confusion overcame you but it quickly dissolved when you realised exactly who was paying your side of the rent and bill. it may not seem that bad but in the agreement it was made extremely clear that both parties would pay half of the overall total, no debate. you needed to talk to him about this.

'has something happened?' aventurine asked looking extremely confused, he'd barely stepped foot in the accommodation before he noticed you waiting for him with your arms crossed.

'yes, without me knowing, you answered before continuing 'i realised that i haven't received the rent and bills in a while, so i asked'-

'i know, i should've told you but surely it's not that big of a deal?' he cut you off, 'i already told you before that i wouldn't mind paying more than i needed to'

'yes but that's beside the point, i just wish that you would've asked me or told me even' it was true that it wasn't a big deal but you felt bad that he was paying more than agreed

'that's understandable, but i take it that you won't make me stop paying for them?' a smirk crawled it's way onto his face and he watched you mutter out a 'whatever' before walking toward you.

'will this suffice for an apology' he said before giving you a hug. he pulled away fairly quickly to see your shocked face and proceeded to walk past you and ruffle your hair, to which you quickly snapped around and yelled at him and he only laughed.

---✩

it had now been quite the while since you started rooming with aventurine. naturally, you two had become much more well acquainted to the point that you call him a friend. even after all this time, he still held up being an ideal roommate and this convinced you even more that this was a fever dream. it baffled you that you now sometimes hung out with him at college aswell.

he had informed you earlier today that he would be back a bit later than usual as he was joining a couple of people to an event, formal or not you didn't quite know. aventurine promised that he would try and not be a disturbance on returning but at this point you wouldn't mind if he was. but you settled to just tell him to have fun and that you don't mind when he comes back, he didn't really have to tell you either but the thought was sweet.

however you didn't expect to be woken up by the doorbell at who knows what time in the morning. you sleepily managed to get to the door and unlock it only to be greeted with two figures - one a very clearly tipsy aventurine and the other being the top student at the college, veritas ratio.

'apologies for the inconvenience but i tried warning the gambler to watch his intake, however he clearly didn't listen to me' ratio started 'again apologies but you're going have to take him now, you are his roommate afterall'

'it's fine really, i don't mind that much' you answered, brain still half clouded with a sleepy fog. ratio nodded and helped you steady aventurine against you with his arm around your shoulder before wishing you luck and leaving. you quickly tried to lock the door again so you could escort aventurine into his room.

with some difficulty, you finally managed to get him into his room. admittedly you'd never been in it before and you felt a little bad about entering but you couldn't just lay him down on the ground outside his door, well you could but that would be unfair. he'd have to deal with the fact that he was going to sleep in his current attire but you doubted that be the top of his concerns in the morning.

however you didn't anticipate aventurine to grab onto you as you tried your best to leave quietly. as you were attempting to pry yourself away you heard him mumble a simple request 'just stay a little while'

you sighed and for some reason you decided to comply, you told yourself that you would stay until he fell asleep then you'd leave and go back to your room. or atleast that was the plan before aventurine took your compliance and wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into a hug - that's fine, it just made it harder to leave but you could manage, is what you told yourself.

unfortunately, you never managed to pry yourself from aventurine and you're sleepy state made it easier to fall asleep then and there. however, you woke up before aventurine and managed to scramble before he woke up, although he woke up not too long after and met you, rather guilty, in the kitchen.

he seemed to remember last night as he started with 'i apologise for my behaviour last night, i wasn't quite in control of myself' he barely could meet your eyes shich was very uncharacteristic for the outgoing blonde and you knew that he probably never wanted to bring this up again.

'it's fine, you were slightly tipsy and it's understandable, barely anything happened either so it's completely fine' you noticed that he still looked rather sad

'thank you' he replied for going back upstairs.

it couldn't be ignored, the somber tone that filled the house felt almost suffocating. in honesty, you found it sweet that he trusted you enough to ask you to stay with him but he was drunk, you knew aventurine wasn't that affectionate but he still seemed to hold a sense of consciousness... no, you were overthinking. you two were friends, that's it. so maybe it was bad you both wished for something more than friends...

taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn

[lowkeychenle]

See My Sea [ZCL] (M) Teaser

Description: You never expected your lab partner to be the captain of the basketball team...or a decent human being, but you get proved wrong twice. Despite a rocky past of your own, you find yourself falling for him faster than you thought. Maybe, with his help, you can finally find your way home and see your sea.

A/N: this is inspired by Marine Turtle sort of ??? it just gave me these vibes oops.

Genre: Fluff/Smut/Angst (there is no smut in the teaser) (College AU where Chenle is captain of the basketball team like he DESERVES)

Content Warnings: SLOW BURN! Drinking, alcohol, intoxication, some instances of friends being shitty, verbally abusive ex-boyfriend appearances, mentions/instances of anxiety and insecurity, a panic attack Smut warnings: This might be some of my mildest smut omg, usage of pet names 'baby' and 'sunshine,' oral (f receiving), slight dirty talk? there's not much rip

Expected Word Count: 15-20k

Release Date: 6pm EST 2023.12.31

Pairing: Zhong Chenle x fem!Reader (feat. Mark & Jisung, a male OC named Woojin, and three female OCs, Soobin, Jiyoon, & Heewon)

Juliet's Masterlist | Tell me what you think? :)

When Chenle makes it out on the court, the wide smile on his face takes you off-guard. There’s no denying the truth—he’s attractive. That’s the extent of what you know about him at this point, but you see plenty of attractive men every day. It’s not like they���ve ever garnered your attention in a way that made you want to watch them.

Unlike earlier, his hair is part down the middle now, probably from running around in practice and preparing for the game. He runs his fingers through it as he walks up to Jisung. The taller man was already standing with their other friend, who you can only assume is Mark. Chenle’s jersey has his last name printed in big letters on the back, along with the number 30.

You try not to study him, but somehow he’s like a damn magnet. No wonder he said he was used to people staring at him.

Jisung glances once in your direction, and then he nudges Chenle and gives him a nearly non-existent nod. He turns, and the second he sees you, his brows jump up in some sort of surprise. Then he grins at you.

“You’re being weird,” Jiyoon mentions, breaking you out of your trance.

“Huh? How am I being weird? He looked at me.”

“Yeah…because he invited you. And you’re here.” She snorts, running her fingers through her hair. “Speaking of which, I think he’s coming over here.”

Your eyes widen, and your head shoots up just in time to see Chenle jogging over to you. You have to crane your neck upward to look at him when he’s right in front of you, and you’re sure the shock on your face is what causes laughter to drop past his lips.

He pulls a simple bracelet off his wrist—one made with blue and gold thread—and holds it out to you. “Wear this for me?”

You blink up at him. “Why?”

“If you wear it and we win, you’re our good luck charm,” he states simply.

Your cheeks burn (hopefully unnoticeably) as you gently take it out of his palm. Your fingertips brush against his skin despite how hard you tried to avoid touching him, and once it’s completely in your hand, he backs away from you as Jiyoon helps you tighten it around your wrist.

“Are we gonna—” Jiyoon starts.

“Say nothing,” you cut her off. “Not a single word about that.”

She giggles to herself. When the game is about to begin, Jiyoon leans forward, hyperfocused on Jisung and the way he carries himself. You want to make fun of her for it, but you know she’ll come back tenfold with jokes about Chenle.

“Also,” Jiyoon whispers, getting closer to you without removing her gaze from the court. “He was totally fucking with you. He just wanted you to wear it. They haven’t lost a game this entire season, so.”

“Why would he do that?” you ask.

This time, she does look at you. She clasps her hands together and stares expectantly.

[ourfatherwhoartinhell]

Silent Hearts // [Part VI]

Pairing | Cowbell x reader

Word count | 4.2k

⚠️ Warnings | Canon divergence, f!reader, Y/N is used. Brief mention of blood/wound, nothing descriptive.

Chapter Summary: After Felix saves you from meeting your end, he brings you back to his den and you learn a thing or two about the strange ghoul you are now unknowingly connected to.

A/N: Between Ghostober and just mental health being utter shit, I'm so sorry this part is so late. Things will start heating up again in future chapters, so enjoy the little break with this one!

[Prev][Next]

There were so many thoughts running through your head. Almost too many. At some point you didn’t even remember how you got into the woods. You just kept walking aimlessly with no real direction as your imagination ran rampant. 

The only reason your face hadn’t repeatedly kissed the forest floor by now was because of Felix. Even in his conflicted state, he had always been one step ahead. He caught you with ease each time you neglected to step over the branches beneath your feet. It wasn’t until the third instance where he caught your stumbling form that finally brought you back to your senses. 

Looking around, once again able to see through your real eyes instead of wherever your mind had been the last few minutes, you saw almost nothing. Not because your eyes didn’t work, but for the lack of light within the forest Felix was leading you through.

For the most part, the canopy of leaves that sat high above hid the already faint light from the moon, leaving the two of you to walk in almost complete darkness. Realizing you could hardly see, and had no idea where you were going, you made a point to start paying more attention to your steps and hold onto Felix’s arm just a little bit tighter. 

Since it was nearing winter, the leaves had started to change, painting the ground with the colours of autumn. Some of the trees had already begun to show signs of the upcoming dormant months with branches almost completely barren. The few remaining leaves they did have were sparse, casting web-like shadows onto the ground like a living mosaic of moonlight and darkness.

Fitting, you thought.

“What’s fitting?” Felix piped up, looking down as he towered over you much like the trees he was effortlessly maneuvering around.

“Hm?” You questioned. “I didn’t say anything?”

His attention turned back to the makeshift path he was carefully walking along, helping you over a decent sized log before replying.

“You said ‘fitting’. I wanted to know what you were thinking about.”

“Oh... I was just looking at how the light on the ground looks like it’s dancing with the shadows.” You looked down, studying the image on the forest floor. “Kind of like what’s going on in my head right now.”

Felix slowed his walk to imagine it for himself, trying to visualize what you were describing since he couldn’t see it the same way you could. He imagined the scene; the moon illuminating the night sky, casting rays of light through the trees onto the dirt below. Leaves crunching beneath his feet after being discarded from the trees, watching them fall from high above like autumnal snow. He could feel the wind flowing through the shedding branches, causing them to sway and shift the casted shadows below, merging them with the bright silvery glow like a silent, earthly dance.

However, there was still the evilness in his head that imagined a version of himself. Standing there under the soft light with his own shadow staring back at him like its own sentient entity, looming and engulfing everything he found beautiful like a living disease.

Pulling his mind back to the present, he shook his head violently in an attempt to free him of his own thoughts. There was no way he would let his demons anywhere near you. He made that vow the moment he found out how important you were. A vow you would hopefully never have to know about.

You stopped abruptly in your tracks, in turn also bringing Felix to a halt a step ahead of you, feeling the resistance through your grasp on his arm.

“Wait a second, how did you know what I said? I didn’t say that out loud.”

“No, but you thought it.” He said with a slight shrug, acting like it was common knowledge. “Remember earlier, when I told you to crouch and run? I didn’t say that out loud, did I? But you still heard it all the same.”

You thought back to earlier that night. You supposed it was being in the heat of the moment that didn’t make you think twice about it. Your inevitable impending doom was clearly more important.

At the time, it wasn’t important how or why you heard him whispering, but now that you had time to consider, it was completely impossible. He had been standing much too far away for it to ever have been audible. And yet, in spite of that, you had still heard him clear as day. The words rang in your ears like he had been right beside you, as if he was as close as he is now.

“Can all ghouls do that?!” You asked curiously, not bothering to hide the accompanying faint hint of fear that went along with it.

Felix chuckled and shook his head, ultimately knocking a leaf free that had landed in his hair moments before. “No, that’s… something special.”

“So, it’s just a you thing.” You stated.

“Yes and no. All ghouls are capable of it, but certain things have to happen first.” He huffs and takes your hand, once again leading you further into the forest. “It’s complicated.”

You decide to just leave it and follow behind him, making sure to pay extra attention to your feet this time. Maybe you’ll find out later.

After what felt like forever, you reached his… house? Home? Burrow?

“It’s called a den,” he said without a single invitation. It was like he could read your mind now! Or maybe your facial expression was just that obvious. “Ghouls have dens. I know it’s not much… Not really my style either. But it’s the best I could do out here.”

His den was actually quite nice, all things considered. He had hidden it well so it wasn’t super obvious to anyone who might be passing by, unless you were specifically looking for it. Maybe some of the Earth ghouls would’ve noticed, since they’ve got a keen eye for this type of thing, but they never usually venture out this far past the perimeter. 

The exterior of the den was mainly covered with branches and leaves. The longer you looked, the more you realized it was almost like an earthly igloo. It had a rounded shape with an entrance at the front. He had even made little open spaces where branches wrapped around to imitate windows. The doorway was more than big enough to accomodate the average person, but you already knew Felix would have to crouch down to get in without bumping his head.

You wondered if he ever thought about fixing it? Though, if it truly bothered him, you’re sure he would’ve done it by now.

Looking down at your expression of admiration as you took in his living arrangements, he gave your hand a quick squeeze and walked you inside.

“Once I was strong enough, I was able to use a little bit of my element to tidy it up and make it a bit nicer to look at. You should’ve seen it before, you’d think I stole it from the beavers.” He chuckled, letting you enter first.

If you thought the outside was impressive, what he had managed to scrape together on the inside was beyond anything you could have even imagined. The atmosphere was so peaceful, you almost forgot you were still out in the woods and not in some fancy hobbit hole. 

He had some fireflies in jars hanging from the roof, which were softly illuminating the surprisingly spacious interior with a warm glow. You were about to say how cruel it was for him to keep them in there, before realizing that none of the jars had any lids. It was just the glass.

Noticing you looking up and assessing his makeshift lighting situation, Felix’s lip pulled into a small smile. “They’re free to go whenever they like. We’ve gotten to know each other over the years. They seem to come back at night to help me out, even though I don’t really need them. They’ll leave once we fall asleep.”

The rest of his den was neat and tidy. He had a small raised area in the back corner which he must've been using as a bed. He had everything you would expect from a small living space; a desk, a chair, a couch. He even had some blankets and actual pillows sprawled out over his bed. 

You had half a thought to wonder where he had gotten those. Last time you checked, blankets and pillows weren’t naturally occurring forest items. Did he go back and steal them? Did someone bring them for him?

“I don’t know what to say…”

“I know it’s not much, but trust me. It’s a lot safer, and easier for me to look out for you if you stay here.”

“Don’t apologize. I kind of love it actually.” You gave him a smile before shivering. A crisp breeze made its way through the open door, causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. However, the chill doesn’t last long before it’s replaced by a warmer breeze, which was definitely out of place for this time of year?

“The spirits are back.” You giggle softly as you feel the air change.

It was Felix’s turn to look at you with a confused glance. “What spirits?”

“You know… the spirits. The ones that always come out during the month of October?”

He just shakes his head and shrugs. Clearly not following, but intrigued nonetheless.

A playful grin works its way along your lips as you roll your eyes, amused at his blatant look of confusion. Taking a few steps further into the den, you sit on the chair in front of his desk before beginning to explain.

“Every year around this time, I always feel the spirits in the graveyard poking through from the other side. I heard some Sisters around the Abbey say that apparently the veil is thinner around October, so that's how they were able to get through. They always stop by to help me out, I think it’s their way of saying thank you?”

“Spirits… coming to say thank you? But they’re dead?” Felix was not buying it in the slightest. “Once you’re dead, your soul either gets set to us, or to the idiots upstairs.”

“Hush. Just let me imagine it, okay?” You chuckled, sending him a playful glare.

While you spoke, Felix had quietly taken a seat on the couch opposite from where you were sitting. The more he listened to you passionately ramble, the more things started to make sense. He couldn’t help the smirk that crept onto his face as he lounged back, tapping his fingers over the arm of the couch in amusement.

“If it wasn’t the spirits, then how come sometimes the flowers I left never wilted? That would be impossible after 2 weeks of being cut! Or… or how they stayed exactly where I left them after that bad storm last year?!”

You just sat with your arms crossed, waiting for your explanation. Unconsciously mirroring the ghoul in front of you, tapping your own fingers in the same pattern against your bicep.

“That's easily explained.”

“Oh, really?” You raised a brow.

“Yeah.” He flashed his signature grin, the one that entranced you from the first night you met. “It was me.”

“I know I haven’t known you for that long, but taking credit for others' work seems a bit too shallow for you. I’m not buying it.”

Knowing there really were no words to explain, he simply decided to show you. 

Holding out his palm, he skillfully grew a perfectly healthy, peach tulip. Exactly like the ones in the last batch you left. He made a point of making it wilt and bringing life back into it once again right in front of your eyes.

While you were focused on the flower, a gust of air came out of nowhere, surrounding the both of you inside the den. Your hair went wild as it got picked up in winds so strong you could’ve swore you were in the middle of a tornado. Quickly you shifted your gaze from the flower to look at Felix in a panic, thinking you were in actual danger. 

Without thinking, you were immediately brought back to your childhood. You knew how the story went, and right now you definitely were not the lucky little piggy in the house made of bricks. 

However, when you met his gaze, his expression was eerily calm. Even the cloud that sat around his eyes was steady and unbothered by the sudden gusts of wind. Felix simply held out the blush coloured flower that rested in the palm of his hand.

You must've looked at him like he was crazy because he simply chuckled and gestured for you to pay attention.

When you finally brought yourself to look, you immediately expected the flower to be blown away given the situation. 

Yet it stayed. 

Not even a petal, or a leaf on the stem moved an inch in the whirlwind that had taken over the space between the two of you.

After he was satisfied, the wind died down as quickly as it appeared. Instead it was now making the flower float in mid-air like it was being dangled on a string. The entire thing appeared to be as light as a falling feather, dancing in front of your eyes before eventually landing on your lap with a graceful softness.

“I hope the wind didn’t bring you a chill.” Felix said, his voice soft as to not startle you, clearly lost in a place of unimaginable wonder.

You didn’t know what to think. You sat there completely speechless after witnessing whatever act of god was just blessed upon you. You knew ghouls had powers of sorts, but this was something else. Something magical.

When you finally met Felix’s gaze, you gave him a smile. “No. That was amazing! H-How did you-”

“All those times you thought it was the spirits messing with you out there? That was me. While my element is mostly Air, I do have some Earth tricks up my sleeve. Though Mountain would beat me on every front in that regard.”

Felix looked to his feet as he remembered the last few years. When he saw you shiver as the nights grew colder, he would silently scold you for not bringing a coat before warming the breeze. When he sensed a storm coming, he would run out and protect the flowers you had just left, returning them to their original state before you even knew they were missing. All to avoid hearing your sighs of disappointment.

Yet, his fondest memory was when he got brave last year and arranged the stems to spell out, ‘Hi’. He would remember your little gasp and the way your face lit up for the rest of time. It was his way of looking out for you without having to meet face to face. Once he realized he could use your imagination to cover up the suspiciousness of it all, under the guise of Halloween, the ideas were endless.

“So, you’re a multi?” You asked in disbelief. You had heard about Copia summoning multi’s, apparently they were a lot of work and quite a handful.

“Of sorts.” Felix gave a genuine smile. “My Earth element isn’t really strong enough to be what the Ministry considers to be a true multi. Simply being an Air ghoul suits me just fine.”

As you sat there processing, he spoke up once more. 

“I tried to warn you, didn’t you realize? When you came to check on me.” He spoke softly, not wanting you to think he was upset. He was just curious.

You tried to think back to what he meant. A lot had happened between then and now but you didn’t recall anything out of the ordinary. “No?”

“The wind was cold and sharp, wasn’t it? It mustn’t have been pleasant to walk through.” He explained, trying to jog your memory. 

Actually, now that you thought about it. When you went to see Felix after your meeting with Mountain, you remembered noting the weather was rather unpleasant.

“That was because of you?”

He nodded. “I was hoping you would turn back, so you didn’t end up literally walking into this mess.”

“Was that why you were so angry too?” You asked softly. “You were trying to protect me?”

He sighed in defeat. “I did a pretty bang-up job of that, didn’t I? It ended up happening anyway.” Felix stood and ran a hand anxiously through his dark locks before his ears twitched, clearly hearing something outside.

“What is it?”

His pointed ear twitched once more but he didn’t seem overly concerned about what he heard this time. “No one to be afraid of.” He grinned as he walked over and held out his hand, offering to help you stand.

Once you had taken up the space at his side, you subconsciously positioned yourself to be able to easily slip behind him. You didn’t know who he was expecting, and you weren’t about to take any chances after you had already had a run in with death today. Leaving Felix as your best chance of survival if that situation arose again.

You nervously awaited whoever, or whatever, was supposed to be coming through the door. Though, neither one of you had to wait too long before you could hear the rustling of leaves as the sound of bootsteps approached. 

Moments later, a familiar face walked into the den. You weren’t sure who was more shocked to see the other, you or him.

“Y/N?”

“Mr. Miller?”

“I just came to check in on Bell to see if everything went alright.” The Ministry’s groundskeeper looked at you in shock. “I didn’t expect to find you here.”

“You know Felix?”

“Who’s Felix?” The older gentleman looked at you clearly confused.

I guess Felix hadn’t told him yet. Oops.

You looked at Felix with an apologetic smile but his expression didn’t look overly bothered in the slightest. “Don’t worry about it. Would’ve happened eventually.” Felix turned his gaze from you to give Mr. Miller a quick smile. “Felix is just my real name, Thomas.”

“Ah, I see.” The groundskeeper nodded in acknowledgement.

There was a short silence while the three of you stood in what was considered to be Felix’s living room, before the older man spoke up to break the silence.

“Y/N, did you get hurt?” He questioned, pointing at the side of my jeans which was sporting a rather large bloodstain. 

You had forgotten about the little slip you had earlier when Felix had ran you off. In the midst of the adrenaline, your talk with the chained ghoul in the catacombs, and eventually being kidnapped– could you even call it kidnapping if you went semi-voluntarily? You had completely ignored the minor scrape on the side of your thigh in lieu of more important things.

If you could’ve seen Felix’s full expression, you were sure he looked utterly horrified. He was mentally beating himself up for not smelling the dried blood or noticing you favouring your right leg before now.

Mr. Miller slowly approached and took in what he could, assessing the damage.

“I slipped when I was running down the hill earlier, I must've scraped it on something.” You explained. With the adrenaline quickly wearing off, and your attention brought back to the injury, you were starting to feel the sting.

“I should be able to fix this up the human way, since your boyfriend here is far from being a quintessence ghoul.” Thomas chuckled, already starting to look around for what he was going to need.

“Oh! No, he’s not my-” 

“She’s not my-”

The groundskeeper halted his search and turned to the pair of you with the most amused expression, much like a proud father witnessing his son bringing home a girl for the first time.

Before you could let the awkwardness get any worse, you quickly interjected. “I didn’t know you knew about ghouls, sir. I’ve never heard you speak of them.”

“I didn’t, not at first.” Mr. Miller replied, continuing his search for medicinal ingredients. “Not until I caught this one stealing my chickens.” He jokingly scolded, giving Felix a look over his shoulder.

The ghoul couldn’t even bring himself to argue, knowing it was completely true. It wasn’t one of his proudest moments. But at the very least, it led to his first healthy human friendship. 

The Ministry’s groundskeeper had helped Felix more than the ghoul cared to admit. Especially while he was recovering and getting used to his new life outside the Abbey. And in return, Felix provided protection for both Mr. Miller and his small batch of crops. Even helping his harvest endure an unexpected early frost, making sure the human could have food for the upcoming winter months.

Thomas would have survived that year just fine with what he had left over from the previous lot, but he would never stop Felix from lending a hand. He had taught him better than that, after all.

The two had created a unique, yet mutually beneficial arrangement.

After Mr. Miller had gathered all the ingredients he had needed from around the den, he laid them out on the table beside a wooden bowl, combining who knows what together to make a paste. Felix tried to look disinterested, standing with his arms crossed. But you could see how he looked over the human’s shoulder every five seconds, silently judging what he was putting together.

“Are you sure you want to add that? I don’t think those go together-”

“Son, why don’t you go for a walk while I finish this?” Thomas offered with a forced smile, ceasing his stirring and glancing at the very large, anxious ghoul lurking over his shoulder. “She’s in good hands. It's the same mixture I used on you a couple years ago, I promise.”

Felix looked a little offended at first to be honest, but looked over to get your opinion on the gentlemans suggestion. If you didn’t want him to leave, then even the devil himself couldn’t force him to go.

However he just found you nodding in agreement, followed by a soft, tired smile. “It’s been a stressful day already, Felix. Why don’t you get some air? I’m sure once you’re back, Mr. Miller will be all finished patching me up and you can finally get some sleep.”

It wasn’t his favourite plan, but he reluctantly accepted and sauntered through the entrance of his den into the forest waiting outside.

As soon as you thought Felix was out of earshot, you finally let your exhaustion show. Letting out a breath and slumping further into the chair. It had been a long day for both of you. But unlike Felix, who was a ghoul, humans could only take so much.

The groundskeeper was working on finishing up adding the last ingredients to the healing paste, catching you folding in on yourself out of the corner of his eye but saying nothing. There really wasn’t anything he could say about the matter, since he still didn’t know why you were here. 

As he turned to face you, he dipped his finger into the pale green concoction to test the consistency, wiping a small amount on his forearm before giving a satisfied nod.

“He’s talked about you for years, you know.” He spoke, trying to lighten the mood and get your mind off whatever was bothering you.

“He has?”

“Sweetheart, you’ve had him wrapped around your finger long before you even knew he existed. And naturally, I had to hear all about it.” Thomas chuckled lightly.

The two of you fell into a comfortable and quiet conversation as he carefully looked after your wound, somehow finding a moment of peace inside the surprisingly warm den.

Outside, Felix was about to have a conversation of his own. Although he didn’t expect this one to be quite so amiable.

Moments after he had left the den, there was an unmistakable rustling of leaves and crackling branches that filled his sensitive ears. With his senses on high alert to make sure they weren’t trying to come for you again, he could smell the intruder from miles away.

Realizing who it was, he made a plan and walked with a false sense of obliviousness to a clearing nearby. He didn’t want to wander too far and leave you unprotected, but he couldn’t lead the ghoul to you. 

Thomas was with you, sure, but how well could he protect you against someone like him? Those were odds he would never even consider gambling with. And if anyone on this godforsaken Earth was likely to bet on improbable odds, it was Felix.

Once the ground became more plush under his boots, he knew he had made it where he needed to go. If anything was to happen, he was going to make damn sure it happened right here. On his terms.

Leaning with his back against one of the forest's robust trees, he listened carefully to make sure that his tail had followed like he had planned. 

Felix smirked contently as he heard those familiar clumsy footsteps drawing closer. Aside from his scent, he was completely hidden from the approaching creature. Waiting for just the right moment to reveal himself.

“Well, well, well.” Felix eventually spoke up. “Long time no see… cousin.”

[Next]

...

Taglist: @cyra-aa@plethora-of-imagines@pandasleepy07

[mariethesley2]

megumi x fem!reader

"Hi and welcome to the very first video tape of me trying to learn how to cook" .... She looks into the void in contemplation and feels the embarrassment crawl up to her face... "Well it's not like I'm showing this to anyone I'm just trying to document my life, so more precisely : hi to the future me! I hope that by then I would have learnt to cook more decent meals".

She always wanted to document her life with that one camera she has since apparently it's a great way to not go insane as a sorcerer ! but the girl never really knew how to start and learning how to cook was a good starter, from one side she gets to film a simple mundane chore done and on the other she gains a basic life skill, one stone two birds!

"anyways I got these groceries," she says that while showing the bag to the camera "going down the endless stairs AND going back up is such a drag, I really HOPEFULLY I won't have to do groceries that often"

That was her first day in the jujutsu high dormitories and wanted to try the tiny kitchen in her room and what better way than to cook pasta in it?

"so I only found this kind of pasta, " she says looking at the package, it's almost expired. The girl turns back to the camera smiling "looks good to me" "then I got this cheese, I'll grate it later, " she fetches something else form the grocery bag "I also have canned mushrooms, cherry tomatoes, a lil bag of flour I got from home, this tiny cute lil brick of milk I'll use it to make the sauce along with these tiny bits of salt and pepper" she said while presenting one by one to the camera.

"I'll try and cook enough for both me and megs "

She grabbed a pot, filled it with water put the pasta to boil with some oil and salt, despite her being alone, she never stopped talking to the camera, it seems like she has a lot to say...

"ok so I have a question, it's kinda personal but do you think megumi wishes he has friends other than me?? 'cuz at this point i' m starting to think that we're only friends because there was no options or am I imagining things?? " she paused to hear the answer and busied herself with the sauce.

It didn't take long for her to remember that she was, in fact, alone and that the answer she was waiting for was never coming

She let out a little laugh to mask the embarrassment "hah.. I'm barely one day in and I'm already losing it it seems... Yaay..." a small pause followed, "still I hope future me has the answer to this!!"

For the rest of the video she remained silent while preparing the sauce, straining the pasta, putting it in bowl for her to share with megumi, she really wanted for the "meal" to turn out just nice, no scratch that, she wanted it to be at least edible.

While arranging the bowl and spilling some sauce on herself and the camera, and with bits of grated cheese almost everywhere she was finally done "and here it is ladies and gentlemen!! This pasta dish made the one and only me!!" the self proclaimed chef looked at the camera with the biggest smile there is, clearly proud of herself.

The door knocked just when she was about to turn off the camera. She quickly hid it and went to get the door and there was her lifelong friend that she may have a tiny little, unnoticeable and insignifiant crush on, but that's a story for later.

"gojo is as-" before he could even start talking, she quickly cut him off out of excitement "I made pasta!! Come taste it!!" the girl took him by the arm and guided him to the tiny kitchen, she slid a fork towards him on the counter "here, have a taste and tell me what do you think".

"are you serious?? How am I supposed to trust you and your non-existent cooking skills?? You remember the sweet chicken or should I remind you if the time we almost die cremated?? " she shoved a fork-ful of pasta before he could cite anymore of her previous epic fails, "so??"...

clearly wrote this with childhood friends to lovers trope in mind...

Author's note ig: I have no idea what I just wrote honestly, if you read it I'm genuinely sorry for you cuz it's boring af and badly written ik. I just wanted to put it out of my drafts cuz it's been bugging me there. I'll prolly never finish it so if anyone wants to rewrite it well you're welcome to!! And maybe tag me so I could read my idea with a better writing style, thanks!! <3

[luckydicekirby]

would love any director's commentary you may have on The Only True Thing if slightly older fics are on the table here bc lowkey it changed my brain chemistry forever. I read it on a whim like four years ago at 1 in the morning and ever since then I've been hooked on making all my fav pairings miserable for no reason. this sounds like sarcasm but I'm being completely sincere the schadenfreude is exquisite

okay first of all I’m SO glad to hear this because making your favs miserable is I think one of the most rewarding activities on this earth so I’m really glad I could help share that joy. thanks also to sylvain for just making it so easy. anyway, here’s some assorted thoughts, hopefully some of which are edifying!

(the only true thing for reference for anyone playing along at home.)

this fic affectionately named the darkling au due to this tweet which I feel like I should put in a hall of fame someday. anyway this entire thread showcases the origin of this fic which was me catie and lily bullying each other on twitter about sylvix, a pastime left behind in 2019 which i really miss.

the thing that really first made me Crazy Cuckoo about sylvain is his B support with Byleth--I'm obsessed with that moment where he very coldly threatens to kill you and then laughs it off, and that was pretty much the jumping off point for Sylvain's characterization in this au--what if he was like that all the time? answer: it would be bad, but also pretty sexy!

One thing I miss about writing for fe3h is the hero’s relics were sooo nice as like. shortcut symbolism. the lance of ruin comes preloaded for you! It’s familial cycles of violence! Easy! and there's a mechanic for it breaking ALSO preloaded into the game mechanics! I wrote like three versions of the ending and the lance getting busted moved around a bit--it originally happened a little earlier.

For a while when I was still femblempilled I was idly thinking about two sequels to this—a sylvain pov sequel about the war, which would have been fun but also Yikes, and then epistolary dorothea/ingrid ideological divorce fic. sorry to dorothea and ingrid who really get the short end of the stick in this universe.

oh there's a playlist. I can’t claim to have put a ton of thought into it it’s just all my fav bad ya boyfriend songs <3 actually dead girl walking reprise is like. yeah that's the fic.

ANYWAY. I feel like a lot of my commentary on this has been washed away by the sea (the passage of time) so a few extras. I apparently wrote like 400 words of sylvain POV of the training yard scene also? Last edited September 26th 2019, here you go:

Felix has always been smaller him, ever since they were kids. Still is these days, to Sylvain’s delight. He wondered about it plenty, these past two years--maybe Felix had a growth spurt. Maybe he caught up to Dimitri. Maybe Sylvain would meet him at the monastery and they’d see eye to eye. Of course they don’t. Felix is a head shorter than him, and he’ll never see things the way Sylvain does. Still. Sylvain thought about it. He’s had a lot of time to think about Felix since the last time he saw him, since Felix ran away. Still a crybaby at heart, no matter how sure he was he’d grown out of it. Not much has changed, Sylvain figures. Felix might have everyone else fooled with that delightfully sharp-edged exterior of his--a pretty decent feint, Sylvian should know--but Felix can’t hide from him. Sylvain sees him down to the bone. The two of them are a matched set: liars at heart.  Like right now. Felix is trying so hard not to cry, his back to the wall of the training yard, his grip tight around the wood of his training sword like he’s actually going to use it. Sylvain hopes he will. He hasn’t gotten to see Felix fight yet, really fight. He bets he’s gotten better. He bets he’s elegant and controlled—maybe less so with Sylvain, and wouldn’t that be nice? That’s how it goes sometimes, when Sylvain dreams about their last day together. Felix’s sword at his throat, biting and cold, ending all this before it began. It would have saved everyone a lot of trouble. Sylvain wouldn’t have had to spend such an awfully long time missing him.  He bets Felix could make him hurt. Nothing seems to do that anymore, except for thoughts of Felix, the ones he can never stop worrying at like a bruise.  Sylvain doesn’t want much these days, and maybe that’s why it’s so hard: he wants Felix in a way that aches, delirious and unstoppable. It doesn’t matter so much how. Felix is welcome to cut him open or kiss him quiet or anything in between. As long as he never stops looking at Sylvain like he is now, hateful and just on the edge of tears, so clearly focused on nothing else. As long as Sylvain can have that, the rest doesn’t matter.  That’s love, Sylvain figures; the cheerful facade he gives the girls is nothing. He forgets about a new one every week. But Felix? He’ll be dead someday, and Felix will still have a grip on his heart, as tight as he’s holding his sword and just as dangerous.

and what exists of the sylvain POV sequel I never wrote:

Felix looks like shit. Of course he’s also beautiful. He’s radiant, for all that his hair’s a mess and his face is drawn and he’s got the kind of dark circles that only come from weeks and weeks of exhaustion. He’s Felix, right? He can’t be anything else. “You look like shit,” Sylvain tells him, because honesty is what Felix thinks he wants from him. He hasn’t seen Felix in six moons, but that probably hasn’t changed. “What are you doing here?” Felix asks. His horse stamps her feet and shakes her head, moving uneasily under him. Felix has never been a good rider. It’s clear he doesn’t appreciate his mare, and she doesn’t appreciate him. Sylvain wonders how long Felix has been making his way across Faerghus like this. He wonders if he stole the horse. It’s awful not to know. “Looking for you,” Sylvain says. “They say you’re searching for the king.” Felix never could stop himself from chasing ghosts. Sylvain hates that about him. It’s just as unfair as everything else: it’s the only reason Sylvain is still here, after all.  “I am. And you should be defending Gautier territory.” “Got a message from your father,” Sylvain lies. He slides off his horse, patting her flank. Felix, clumsily, does the same. “He wants you to come home.” That part’s probably true.  Felix scoffs. “My old man can send all the messages he wants. I’m going to find the boar.” He means it. Sylvain can see that he means it, in the flinty look in his eyes, the fold of his arms, the jut of his chin as he looks up at Sylvain. It’s the saddest thing Sylvain’s ever seen, and he’s seen a lot of shit. “Felix,” he says. He reaches out. He can never help it, not when Felix is like this, not when he believes. Felix doesn’t flinch from Sylvain’s hand on his cheek anymore. “Sweetheart. You know he’s dead.” “Don’t call me that,” Felix says. But when he swings himself back in the saddle and Sylvain does the same, he doesn’t tell Sylvain not to follow. That’s more than good enough. 

[phxntomhives]

"The parade of battlers" analysis

SINCE NO ONE IS DOING THIS??? WHY??? I WILL DO IT

Hopefully my wrong takes will trigger someone and you all will get a decent analysis

Eng lyrics because I don't know japanese are from the official music video! Also warning, English isn't my mother tongue.

Lost in an unacceptable tragedy

An unfading warmth quivers blue in the depth of my eyes

Stifling impurities leave keloid scars and

Even now, still mourn for days gone by, never to come back

Staking my life, spitting blood and vomit

All I want to do is lead a beautiful life

But why can't you hear

Me telling you not to stumble

Love turning on its head, fiction caught in a tangle

Say bye bye to mundane concepts

See how the compensated formless stand imposingly

Their presence is a sight to behold

Rip apart, drag and reveal

Throw away all inferiorities

Even the raw emotions of cursing someone

Take them in like an offering

Just skilled at pretending to be human

Searching for those other than monsters

Like the blue shimmer of

A star of the first magnitude

Far from having enough faith

This utterly ridiculous destiny won't retreat

Fill the air with the echo of the marching boots

Let the parade of the lonely ones begin now

Everything in this world, there isn't much

Difference between the atrocious or noble as you think

Somewhere up in the sky, someone is making selections

To ensure the cycle of birth and passing is upheld

Though we have prayed and knelt down

Our prayers have been cremated

And ignored with a "So what?"

So kind

A colorless encounter, pupils of glass

Thought they may shatter to pieces,

You laugh your head off, saying, "you must be kidding"

You give the finger as you spew poison and let it all out

Scorched, boiling and trembling

A blazing fire from the past still smolders

That remorse still within me

I'll burn and retaliate in full

There is no such thing as eternity, so

There is no ending until all turns to ash

Then why not play

With fire in a refined manner?

No more need for empty rhetorics

Such hollow, scathing criticism

Burn this ceaseless stone-throwing

The parade of the lonely ones has just begun

There's no love, no love, there's no love there

There's nothing, there's nothing, there's no truth

There's just one, just one

In this world, just one person, one person

Question fanatically and

Live the shit out of this world

ANALYSIS UNDER THE CUT BECAUSE THIS BITCH IS LONG

ALSO MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE MANGA!!!

Yana, dear, are you sure this is the intro for the Weston college arc??? And not the blue cult??? LIKE, REALLY REALLY SURE??? My comprehension of text can be lacking in more than one way and I just followed the vibe but... I don't think I am that wrong on some points? You are seeing it too, right?

I feel like the song has a mix of present, past and future along with different POVs and I hope I have been able to separate them well.

The colors are just to show the lyrics and i changed it because pretty.

What I can actually connect to Weston Arc

"Then why not play with fire in a refined manner? / No more need for empty rhetorics Such hollow, scathing criticism. / Burn this ceaseless stone-throwing" Which could very much be related to O!Ciel's pyromaniac episode lol. He didn't forget

"The parade of the lonely ones has just begun" : at this point the "parade of the lonely" could very much be the parade of the bizzare dolls considering the amount of reference there is to them. And it would be nice considering in this case the sentence is right after the stone-throwing Purple house, since the students were "transfered" in the there.

If the previous point is correct then also here, we are talking of the bizzare dolls: "This utterly ridiculous destiny won't retreat / Fill the air with the echo of the marching boots / Let the parade of the lonely ones begin now". I guess the "echo of the marching boots" could be the sound the dolls made before getting free during the midnight tea party? As for why they don't retreat well, we have seen they aren't exactly rational for now.

"Scorched, boiling and trembling / A blazing fire from the past still smolders / That remorse still within me /I'll burn and retaliate in full": this could be a description of what O!Ciel is feeling in general. His determination coming from everything that happened is still going strong.

Onestly, these are the only thing I can see strictly related to the present and this arc in particular lol. Everything else goes deeper.

Memories of the past

This part will likely make the least sense, because I am still sobbing over the whole past ok.

"Lost in an unacceptable tragedy Even now, still mourn for days gone by, never to come back": We all know the past. The safest bet is that O!Ciel is mourning, but is he? He never had the time to mourn, he moved immediately to revenge and working for the queen. So either this is just to hit us in the feeling, or maybe it's my favourite victim of this analysis: Undertaker. Could it be him? Possibly, but this being O!Ciel breaks my heart more. I am excluing R!Ciel because at the moment of Weston arc his version should not be that complex. And Sebastian is Sebastian.

"Staking my life, spitting blood and vomit /All I want to do is lead a beautiful life / But why can't you hear / Me telling you not to stumble": I feel like this either O!Ciel talking to himself, admitting that he would like to just be happy but still forcing himself to be strong and act to revenge his family. Or, high on copium, the first part is O!Ciel's wishes and the second part is O!CIel using the R!Ciel allucination make himself stronger (I doubt it, but it adds to the sadness).

"Rip apart, drag and reveal / Throw away all inferiorities /Even the raw emotions of cursing someone /Take them in like an offering": I got the epiphany after several times of reading this and yes it's about revenge hatred yadda yadda yadda. But what if, in particular, it's related to the moment when O!Ciel summoned Sebastian? I think it's the only time I remember "offering" being mentioned/relevant in the manga. O!Ciel is throwing everything away for revenge, assuming a new identity. So this could be either O!Ciel talking to himself during that desperate time. Or, just to hurt myself more, him allucinating again a conversation with R!Ciel where R!Ciel is the one that is saying all this. I will go cry now, brb.

"Everything in this world, there isn't much /Difference between the atrocious or noble as you think / Though we have prayed and knelt down / Our prayers have been cremated /And ignored with a "So what?" " : God, this section is killing me. Memories of when the twins were captured, For them and all the other children, it was an atrocious experience, while the nobles were truly thinking they were in the right, that there was nothing wrong in what they were doing. They believed to be noble enough to be above everything and ignored absolutely everything in regards to the children.

Undertarker is not being subtle. Like at all.

Somewhere up in the sky, someone is making selections/To ensure the cycle of birth and passing is upheld: here I am conflicted. Undertaker is sure making selections when he is creating the bizzare dolls "you get to be revived. you don't". But at the same time he is not uphelding anything. He is doing the opposite infact. Unless this is supposed to just describe the Shinigami's role to show how Undertaker is going in the opposite direction.

There's just one, just one/In this world, just one person, one person/Question fanatically and/Live the shit out of this world: we only really see two characters question stuff: O!Ciel with the murder of his family and Undertaker with the Cinematic record ways of working. Now, i don't really see O!Ciel "question fanatically" and "live the shit out of this world", while we can debate about how "fanatically" he is searching for the culprits, how are you telling me he is living his best life? He is surronded by trauma, has to go on a mission for the queen every other day, has to live as his dead twin and in this specific arc he has to act all cutesy and adorable when he hates it. He is far from any best life I am more surprised he didn't become histerical yet honestly. The one that IS living his best life is Undertaker (well... more or less). In the Weston Arc he did say he was enjoying being the headmaster. Plus he could make some more esperiments on Derek&co which, on top of that, were mostly successful! Do you know how much serotonin a succesful experiment gives you? A LOT. TRUST ME.

Bizzare Dolls (BD for short because I am lazy)

Well, ofc they are the protagonist of the animation, they are everywhere in the song too.

"An unfading warmth quivers blue in the depth of my eyes / Stifling impurities leave keloid scars and": Are the BD warm? Idk, but I don't think so? A body is warm when the blood is running because the heart is pumping it. Do BD have a working heart tho? I doubt the original version do, but what about the new and improved versions? Agares could have probably be our best bet but he always wore gloves (even when he was alive) so we don't really know.

Warmth aside, what I am quite confident IS a reference to the BD is the keloid scars. I did a reseach and a keloid scar is a "scar keeps growing and becomes bigger than the original wound. They are developed after a skin injury". The scars we have seen are O!Ciel's scar from when they marked him, or the BD's "surgery" scars?

Ofc it could be just metaphorical about the trauma just keep on growing in O!Ciel. Maybe it's more this one but again, I am take things directly

"Love turning on its head, fiction caught in a tangle/Say bye bye to mundane concepts/See how the compensated formless stand imposingly/Their presence is a sight to behold": cambridge dictionary say that "turn something on its head means to cause something to be the opposite of what it was before". Apparently, there are many things that are the opposite of love, depending on your source: hatred, fear, indifference. I think in this case, since we are talking of the BD, we can use indifference. They aren't moved by real emotions at this moment (Weston arc) and even later, they are probably fake emotions based on fake memories (from the orphanage children but I will not elaborate, other theories have done it better). Fear could also work since well, most people are rightfully terrified of them. Being far away from mundane concepts? I would say they fill this box. And they sure are a sight to behold, nothing against it. What confuses me is the "compensated formless" I don't have any idea of what it could mean

"Just skilled at pretending to be human / Searching for those other than monsters + Like the blue shimmer of / A star of the first magnitude / Far from having enough faith": We are looking at the current arcs here in the first lines. The one skilled at pretending to be human and searching for things is Sebastian (it can't be O!Ciel because he isn't pretending to be human). What he is searching is the headmaster, that we know being Undertaker and it ends up bringing with him, again, the BD. In particular, it specifically mentions R!Ciel. You know what is the name of the biggest star of first magnitude that is currently known? Yeah, you are correct, it's Sirius. And we have known Ciel is Sirius for a while now. As to why the star does not have lot's of faith, do I have to remind you "Dear God, why are you smiling?".

"So kind /A colorless encounter, pupils of glass /Thought they may shatter to pieces,/ You laugh your head off, saying, "you must be kidding"": Listen, I have seen a couple of people mentioning "oh it's a reference to monochrome no kiss". But I don't think that's the case, not completely at least. I think this is a parallel of O!Ciel and Sebastian's meeting to R!Ciel and Undertaker. First because one of the people involved is laughing, and Sebastian smirks but has never really laughed out loud, the one that spends his time laughing is Undertaker. Second is the pupils of glass that can shatter to pieces. I wonder if it means that R!Ciel could be using glass balls for his eyes? When we have seen his not-completed form they look pretty empty and they are made of soft tissue, so maybe Undertaker changed the "real eyes" with glass? Idk. The shattering could also indicate the fragility of the BD that are still far from perfect.

There is no such thing as eternity, so /There is no ending until all turns to ash this made me scream Undertaker's BD because we know he needs a full budy for the creation of his dolls and bringing back to life his loved ones. And we know he can't bring back Vincent because his body was too ruined by the fire. So fire IS the only ending in which a person can just die with no possible interference from a Shinigami with resurrection intent.

Tragedy twins

I had no idea of these lines other than, it just fits the vibes. Until I remembered how much Yana likes to mirror the twins.

There's no love, no love, there's no love there: this one is R!Ciel singing. Undertaker may have started to work on the BD out of grief for his loved ones, but it feels like it turned into an obsession.

There's nothing, there's nothing, there's no truth: let's add some angst because this one was not enough. O!Ciel never gets to discover the truth behind the murder of his family before he dies. Maybe we, as readers, can see it. Maybe from Sebastian's eyes. But yeah, we don't have a guarantee that O!Ciel will ever know anything, he could just die with Sebastian being unable to prevent it (either because it happened due to a Shinigami, or maybe an angel or god knows what).

But of course, we can also swap them! O!Ciel was so confident people wouldn't have liked him coming back alive and so started the whole identity swap, so he could still feel like the love he is receiving now is fake, since it's built on a lie. While R!Ciel's truth could now be either the murder or the family again, or the fact that he isn't "real" now. He is a BD, his action and thoughts are based on memories that are likely not his own. He has become a fake, a lie. "There is no truth" because that is a BD similar to him, and not necessary him.

I am exhausted I haven't thought about something this much since my thesis. Yes some of them are quite the stretch, hopefully I will trigger a smart person and finally we get a good analysis. Meanwhile you have to deal with me. Feel free to add your opinions pls, I love hearing theories.

PSA: I have formatted this half on computer and half of phone so idk how weird the formatting is I will check again tomorrow, now I'm tired of rereading it.

[authorsadiethatcher]

I love summer, but May is my favorite month. Why? Because it's my birthday month. And I chose the picture to go along with this month's State of the Thatcher Address because my favorite color is blue. If you've paid attention to my covers, you've probably noticed that. There's a lot of blue outfits.

April was filled with family obligations, travel, and some medical stuff. I still got lots of writing done, for both of my pen names, but it was not just a work month for me. May will definitely have more words get written as I have deadlines approaching.

I'll talk about May's writing a little further down, but this month should be a good one. And the current weather forecast has the rain giving way to warm temperatures and sun just in time for my birthday. I can't complain about that.

A quick reminder that you can find my books on Amazon, Smashwords, Google Play Books, Apple Books, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, and Everand. You can also read everything I’ve published under my Sadie Thatcher name since last May on Ream, which is a subscription platform built specifically for authors. You can check out my Ream page below.

Ream: https://reamstories.com/sadiethatcher

And speaking of Ream, I have a Ream exclusive novel called The Muse (extreme dollification) that is now complete. I’ve made the first three chapters available for free. All you have to do is sign up as a follower at the link above to get a taste of my first real story that is too extreme for Amazon.

I also post the occasional bit of flash fiction for followers on Ream. I have one up already and plan to post another one this week. As soon as I'm inspired, I'll add a new mini-story to Ream.

On the Libby Feron front, my fantasy writing is going decently well. I'm working on a series of novellas or short novels that was initially inspired by the pirate attack on Port Royal in the Pirates of the Caribbean movie. But on top of that, I'm also got an idea for a time travel fantasy novel percolating in my head. More on that another time. However, since I don’t talk about my fantasy writing often, checking out https://libbyferon.com/ and signing up for the email newsletter is the best way to stay informed. At some point, there will be a free novella offered.

Now it’s time to talk about what to expect this month. First, I've already released the first book in the His Dreams Series. This is the first time I've written specifically from the male perspective for an entire story. The entire series will be like this.

I also have one last book left in The Secret Series. I plan to finish writing it today and will be submitting it for publishing May 3.

And then there's the new content. I have two new series that will begin to appear in the middle and then the latter part of the month. First is an alien hucow story. A town will be taken over by aliens and the population turned into livestock for the aliens. I'm not sure of all the details yet, but I'm excited to write it.

Finally, there's a series idea I've had for a while that I'm looking forward to. It's been documented that if a male dominated workplace has a single woman, nothing will really change. Instead, the woman is far more likely to conform to the male points of view, playing along so that she can be one of the boys. While the reality of that is unfortunate, it makes for a good setup for a bimbo story, which I'm calling Tokenized, at least for now. All titles and ideas are subject to change with my whims and muse.

So that about does it. You can also hopefully expect a fantasy novella from me as Libby Feron at the end of the month called A Throne of Bones. What a month this will be.

[goldenempyrean]

Hi! Could I please request sick reader x Scarlett where R passes out from heat/exhaustion/whatever and Scarlett panics a little/ takes care of us until we come to? Maybe on set for a movie or sth? Just soft soft wife Scarlett please. Thank you so so much!

Way Too Warm

〚 Notes - Hey, hey, hopefully you’re having a great day. I’ve never really written for heat exhasution so this is new leaf for me, no promises of how medically accurate things are :P Anyways! Enjoy :D 〛

〚 Summary - Filming in the summer had its drawbacks. Especially when they came in the form of a rather unpleasant bout of heat exhaustion. But theres no way Scarlett is going to let you go through it alone. 〛

〚 Wordcount - 1312 〛

〘 Check Out My Masterlist! 〙

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The harsh heat from the sun beat down against you. It beat against everything really. Whilst filming in the summer was great, it really did have its drawbacks, especially when you had to film outside. One being the intense temperatures which you’d have to work in and today was no different.

Temperatures had reached an all-time high and if you were being honest, it had started to affect you. It had begun when you’d failed yet again to a decent night sleep. You’d hardly slept, mainly because of the sheer stuffiness of your trailer, another negative effect of the intense heat. The feeling of fatigue had gradually washed over you and before long you’d felt a headache begin to settle behind your eyes.

By some miracle, you’d managed to somewhat cover up how you felt, shrugging off your costars concerns, and everything had gone pretty smoothly too so far but as fate had it, that didn’t last long.

By the time lunchtime rolled around you felt awful, you could hardly keep yourself awake not to mention the thick cloud of fog which had taken refuge in your head. It felt like everything around you was being filtered through a sheet of cotton.

Looking down at your schedule, you saw that it was time to film your scenes with Scarlett. This was always your favourite part of the day. Scarlett was on the team of producers along with being one of your co-stars which meant during her work-hours were hectic meaning you only really saw her if you were filming together. Of course, you’d still see her after the day had finished, you did share a trailer afterall but it was always great to see her during the day too. So, you took a deep breath, readied yourself and stumbled down to set.

“Hi, my love,” Scarlett smiled wide when you finally made it onto set. It turns out walking is alot harder when your view of the world feels like it’s spinning around at 90mp/h, “You okay?” She asked, noticing your spaced gaze.

“Im fine.” You fibbed, waving off her concerns. You could tell she didn’t quite believe you but at that moment your director called for everyone to get into positions, so she had no choice but to drop it.

What happened next, in your mind, was nothing short of embarrassing. Scarlett gave her line perfectly but when it came to you… nothing? Your mind went blank, completely and utterly blank so instead of speaking, you just stood there awkwardly, looking off at some distant point.

“Cut! Y/N, what was that? Is everything alright?” The loud voice of your director snapped you out of your haze.

“Im sorry! My mind just went blank.” You apologised before getting back into your position, airily mindful of Scarlett’s eyes as she looked over you with an expression you couldn’t quite recognise. Was it worry?

"Just give me a minute."

You took a deep breath weary of Scarlet's eyes follow you, and not just her eyes. Her whole body seems to pivot toward you but still, she only watched as the both of you got back into your original positions.

"Action!" Your director shouted again.

You tried. You really did try. But that pain gnawing at your temples began too much, the world spun. it became hard to process what was going on around you and you found yourself tongue tied yet again.

Scarlett tried to cover for your mistake, inventing another line for her character. However, your director appears to be tired of your antics and calls out the command once again, "Cut. Y/N, I don't know what's going on with you today but if you're going to waste my time you can head back to your trailer."

Scarlett shot him a look that you’d hate to be on the receiving end of. You took a step forward as you began to stammer another apology, but a wave of nausea came over you, causing you to stop and cup your arm around your stomach as you winced.

The next thing you knew, your peripheral vision went black as your knees buckled, giving out beneath you sending you dropping to the floor with a thud.

“Y/N!” Scarlett shouted as she rushed over towards you, kneeling beside you in an instant, “Fuck. Are you okay?”

Your head felt unimaginably heavy as you struggled to fight against the urge to close your eyes. Barely registering Scarlett’s touch as her worried hands cupped your faces. But your efforts were in vain as only moments later, your vision swayed and dimmed as you inevitably blacked out.

You weren’t sure how long you were out. The next time you opened your eyes, your head was resting in Scarlett lap as she cradled you, quietly whispering words you couldn’t quite hear.

You made a noise of discomfort and confusion as you slowly came round, “Mm.”

“Jesus Christ Y/N, you almost gave me a heart attack.” Scarlett breathed a heavy sigh of relief as she helped you move up into a sitting position. She kept her arm around your shoulder to support you, but it was as her arm touched your exposed skin that she noticed the intense heat coming radiating from you. Prompting her to place her palm over your forehead.

“You’re way way too warm sweetheart,” Scarlett voiced as she kept her cool hand pressed against your forehead, calling over for the on-set medic so he could take a look at you now that you’d come too.

Ignoring your protests, the medic came over and knelt down with the two of you, he handed Scarlett cool, damp cloth which she used to gently dap along your forehead whilst making sure to keep her hand clasped around your own as the medic started his observation, looking over you with an unreadable expression.

“Headache?” He inquired.

You nodded.

“Fatigued?”

You nodded again.

“Have you been feeling nauseous at all?” He asked as he reached into his bag, rooting over before pulling out a thermometer.

“A little.” You admitted, not missing the small worried glance Scarlett gave you hearing your answer.

The medic hummed as he held his thermometer to your head. It was the fancy kind which required no actual contact for it work. Seconds later it beeped, the small digital screen gave off an orange light as it displayed the numbers ‘38.7’.

“You’re running a fever. A pretty high one at that, combined with your other symptoms I think it's safe to say that you’re experiencing heat exhaustion.” He announced before standing up, “you shouldn’t work for the next day or so, not until this heat dies down a little. Try your best to keep cool and your symptoms should slowly go away too.”

“Thanks.” You gave a weak smile as the medic left to go and sort out some paperwork and you slowly began to pull yourself up.

“Easy there,” Scarlett soothed as she helped you stand, “I guess we better get you back to the trailer, you should’ve said you weren’t feeling well. Heat exhaustion isn’t a joke y’know.”

“I know, Im sorry.” You sighed, taking Scarlett’s hand in your own, “I didn’t think it was that bad.”

“It's alright, let’s just get you cooled off, a cold shower should make you feel better too.” Scarlett smiled as she began to lead you away from the set, “you’ll be okay, is there anything else I can do to make you feel better sweetie?”

You shrugged, ignoring your discomfort as the hot sun shined down onto you, magnifying your nausea, “I just need to cool off,” You tried to sound assuring, giving a soft smile as the pair of you continued towards your trailer, “Thanks for taking care of me.”

“Of course, now, let's get you inside.” She smiled as you approached your trailer, “I promise you’ll start feeling better soon.”

[sunriseverse]

prompt request: pangzi pouring hot water on xiaoge's bare chest, revealing his tattoo, but in the GAYEST and most TENDER way you can manage it.

i am SO late filling this prompt but hopefully this is sufficiently gay and tender.

-

The thing about tombs is, the getting in is easy enough—oh, sure, there’s the requisite amounts of traps, awful things that would give those unaccustomed to this sort of life creeping, crawling nightmares—; it’s the getting out that’s the tricky bit. All those dukes and barons and what-have-you never much minded people coming in—rather, they have always been more concerned with making sure no one gets out with their funerary treasures in tow. There’s a reason why tombs are known to be full of corpses, and it’s not just the ones originally buried there. The Iron Triangle, though—they’re about as used to this as can be, all considered; when you spend the better part of your life in tombs—Pangzi and Xiaoge—or studying the notes of someone who did—Wu Xie—, you gain a sort of long-suffering acceptance for whatever bullshit they throw at you.

Which is why Pangzi is only complaining mildly as they make the last leg of the hike out of this place. “Don’t they know how to build a better tomb,” Pangzi says, trying to peel the muck and waterweeds drying uncomfortably on his skin off from an unfortunate run in with a pond, water beetles, and far too many bones on the bottom of it. “What, are all of the architects stuck in the fifteenth century? What sort of Yuan bullshit…”

“Yes,” Wu Xie deadpans. “It’s from the end of the Yuan period, didn’t you spend two days reading over my shoulder while I was researching?”

“Semantics,” Pangzi huffs. “Xiaoge, don’t you think there’s far more muck ponds in tombs than there should be?”

“Mn,” says Xiaoge, forging the path ahead. He, if it’s possible, is even dirtier than Wu Xie and Pangzi combined, probably because he got trapped beneath the two of them when they fell through the false floor, an event that had led to Pangzi, trying not to panic, as they fished around blindly to drag him to the surface. It’s not an experience he’s keen on repeating. His hair is slicked down against his skull, dull brown with mud, and his hoodie is probably beyond saving at this point. He’s taken off the strap that holds his sword, opting instead to hold the sheath in his hand. Out of them all, that sheath is probably the least affected—the black and gold is as lustrous as ever, unmarred by any crackling brown dried mud.

It’s unfortunate that they’re pretty far from the house, so they’ll have to make camp for the night once they get out, and continue along in the morning, but as luck will have it, it’s shading into summer, and when they breach the entrance—well, side entrance; the main entrance has locked itself up tight as a clam—, the air is almost balmy, a welcome change from the underground chill of the tomb. Wu Xie, who spent the past few days pouring over maps, confidently takes the lead and takes them to a small creek, where they set up camp, including a fire and a decent excuse for a meal made of dried, sealed food that had managed to escape the muck, some foraged greens, and a lucky rabbit. Once Wu Xie finishes his portion, he lets out a wispy sigh and says, “I’m going to sleep. Wake me up when we leave.”

“You’re going to sleep like that?” Pangzi says, gesturing at him—grey mud dried at the edges of his face where he hadn’t been able to wipe it off, his shirt crinkling and shedding grey matter as he moves, his hair, the faint wave of it lost as it clumps together.

Wu Xie raises a brow. “I’ll survive,” he says. “I can take a shower once we get back.” With that, he fishes out the—somewhat affected—bedroll from his pack and rolls it out far enough from the campfire so as to avoid the heat and brightness, and promptly turns on his side and goes to sleep. Pangzi meets Xiaoge’s gaze across the campfire where the other man is quietly finishing the last of his food, and can’t help the grin that tugs at the corners of his lips, mirrored in the way the corners of Xiaoge’s eyes gentle as they brush over the sleeping form of their third.

Xiaoge, though—Pangzi knows him well enough to recognise the slight stiffness in his motions, the lack of a wince where, in anyone else, there would be one. Xiaoge may not complain, but Pangzi knows he doesn’t enjoy being dirty like this. For a moment, he considers just dragging Xiaoge into the creek, washing off together, before he catches sight of the pot over the fire again and has a better idea.

He washes the pot and the bowls under Xiaoge’s patient gaze, and then himself. When he brings the pot back to the fire, full of water, Xiaoge tilts his head in silent question. “You can’t keep walking around like that,” Pangzi tells him, and gently tugs at the hoodie half glued to his frame. “The top, at least—I’m not going to make you walk around without any pants.”

“No,” Xiaoge says, and there’s mirth in his tone. “Not that far.”

“Aiyah, Xiaoge’r!” Pangzi scolds, hitting his shoulder gently. “Quit running your mouth and take off your clothes.”

In the end, though, rather than Xiaoge taking off his clothes, Pangzi winds up doing it for him—half because of the way the clothes stick to Xiaoge’s skin too much for him to easily get them off, half because—well, sue him, he likes having his hands on Xiaoge in gentle, mundane ways like this. The zipper goes, and Pangzi gently slides the hoodie off his shoulders, then his arms, then helps him get his undershirt off as well, the grey of it almost disguising how dirty it is. Once he gets to skin, it’s to find that not even the clothes have managed to save Xiaoge, and he lets out a quiet sigh. “Aiya,” he murmurs, and reaches to dip one of the bowls into the pot of water and gently pours it over Xiaoge’s shoulder, gently scrubbing at his skin with his fingertips to get rid of the filth. Xiaoge stays remarkably still, head bowed, and beneath his fingers, Xiaoge’s skin slowly heats.

It doesn’t take long for Xiaoge’s tattoo to begin to show up, and Pangzi can’t help the way his fingers hesitate to touch it. To his surprise, though, Xiaoge’s hand comes up to gently press his hand to the skin, and Pangzi can’t help but shiver slightly at the intimacy. The time it takes to fully clean the dried muck off of him isn’t long, but it feels like a small eternity—breath caught in his throat, heart pounding beneath the cage of his ribs, hard enough that he’s half convinced Xiaoge can hear it. When the water runs out, Xiaoge’s skin washed clean, he can’t help but gently draw his fingers across the lines of the qilin, feel the gentle beat of Xiaoge’s heart beneath his skin. Without thinking about it, he duck his head and presses a kiss in the wake of his touch.

For a moment, Xiaoge tenses beneath the touch, and he almost thinks he’d misread the atmosphere, before Xiaoge lets out an almost imperceptible sigh, body relaxing, and Pangzi can’t help but smile against his skin.

It doesn’t go far; they’re both tired, and the woods are no place for any sort of intense activities, but when he raises his head, Xiaoge meets his gaze with dark, luminous eyes full of a fond heat, and Pangzi can’t help but reach out to cradle his jaw, kiss his cheeks, his nose, his lips. Xiaoge’s fingers bury themselves in his hair for just long enough for them to exchange lazy, unhurried kisses—Xiaoge’s lips soft, his mouth warm, head tilted so they fit together, nose pressing against Pangzi’s cheek. When he draws back, they just stay like that for a few, long moments, before a yawn cracks Pangzi’s jaw. “Bed,” Xiaoge says, decisive, and Pangzi can’t help but smile as he allows himself to be herded across camp, the fire put out and the bedrolls unrolled next to Wu Xie’s, the last memory before sleep that of his lovers on either side of him.

[masterofrecords]

Angstober day 5: Do better

Blood Ties

“I told you not to come here.”

It was alright for them to visit each other’s homes, but her mixing up the personas, visiting him when he was Thobias and not Adrian? That was risky, and thoughtless.

“The boy knows,” she blurts out, thankfully quietly.

That gives him pause.

He locks the door, draws the curtains. The barrier, protecting from eavesdroppers, pushes out towards the walls, and only then he allows himself to let Adrian’s face bleed onto his.

“Come again?”

“That… clerk at old hag’s law firm. He found the lab.”

“I thought you said you’ve dealt with it,” he remarks, and her mouth twitches.

“He kept digging even after being told to drop it. I don’t know – he’s young and… upright, I guess.”

“How remarkable.”

He can tell she’s getting frustrated that he doesn’t seem to be sharing her urgency, but in truth, he has no reason to be worried. The only thing connecting him to the lab is Margaret herself. The boy is her problem.

After all, Adrian knows nothing about alchemy, or the occult. He’s made sure those were other faces. Adrian is barely anybody, too busy mourning his parents untimely deaths.

“Look, lend me someone for a few nights, I’ll get rid of him. I’m sure he hasn’t told anyone, it’ll be fine, I just need some extra support – he’s on his guard now, and I heard he’s s decent fencer.”

She’s running her fingers along the seam of her skirt, too nervous for the kinds of things she’s saying.

“What are you not telling me?” he asks, and she shudders under his gaze before straightening out.

“Doesn’t matter, I’ll fix it,” she insists, but she’s not a good enough liar, and he knows her too well.

“What are you not telling me?” he asks once more. With someone else, he might have made effort to put in some emphasis.

With her, just the repetition is enough.

Still, she hesitates.

“He has the book,” she says quietly, as if hoping he wouldn’t hear.

It’s not fatal, of course. He has contingencies – he’s seen the full description; worst case scenario, he will force himself into remembering. But the enormity of her blunder is…

He looks at Margaret again. He’s long since thought of her as just Margaret at this point, but perhaps there was some lingering affection in the way he’s let her stay even as she grew sloppier in her work, as his own strength soared far beyond needing her.

That boy though…

Strong, righteous, persistent. Adrian’s thoughts go back to the dark throne hidden underground, to the kind of blood it thirsts after.

“Don’t kill him, bring him to me,” he orders her, and her too-expressive face turns angry.

“He’s not some nobody that won’t be missed!” she hisses. “Why?”

He ignores her question and repeats, “Don’t kill him. Figure something out, fake his death – I don’t care, just get it done. And move the lab. The warehouse is empty for now, use that.”

She wants to argue, and he again conjures Thobias’s red hair and five-o-clock shadow to let her know the conversation is over.

Last chance for her to do better.

After all, he’s running out of other blood relatives to offer to the hellfire.

---

It might look like I'm behind, but technically I have 6 pieces written as of today, I just ended up writing tomorrow's one instead of today's. It... makes sense with the in-universe timeline. Hopefully tomorrow I'll be able to post both...

And for now, more Adrian and Margaret (or: how this nephew-aunt relationship ends): Awakening, Tools Discarded and Broken

[slowdesire]

How does one get into f1 i want to but idk where to start:(

this is going to be a very basic answer but it’s exactly how i got into it: watch drive to survive! a lot of people like to shit on fans who get into f1 through that show, but honestly, i don’t see the harm 🤷‍♀️ in my opinion it’s a really good introduction to the teams because it shows you midfield/backend people, not just the same top teams who always win lol. also i personally prefer personality and character over all the technical aspects of the sport so if you feel similarly then dts is a decent starting point! it’s not the most ACCURATE portrayal of things and i only know that with hindsight after being into f1 from 2022-2024, but it’s really just the easiest way to begin without being overwhelmed by the current season and all the finer details of how the sport works.

aside from drive to survive i also recommend podcasts. these recommendations are obviously just coming from personal experience so if you’re not into podcasts, don’t heed my advice 🥲 but what really pulled me back into f1 was listening to a podcast episode with oscar piastri and i generally love hearing about drivers’ mentalities, upbringings, their perspectives as athletes, etc. just search whatever driver piques your interest in the podcast category and i swear it’ll keep you amused for hours on end

another recommendation i have is to watch grill the grid on youtube! i personally haven’t seen most of the episodes (lol fake fan) but that’s what helped my friend get into f1 even before watching drive to survive so maybe you’d prefer that too!

again these are all very personality-driven instead of teaching you any technical aspects of f1 lmao but if you’re more concerned about understanding technical details then maybe you could search for videos/articles about those on youtube as i believe the f1 channel has some about basic terms and stuff… i’m not too sure…

one more thing that helped me a lot was just searching for “f1 primer” here on tumblr! my favorite one is this oscar primer by @mecachrome one of my favorite oscar fans 🐨 aside from providing a lot of info about drivers i think there are some primers geared toward the sport in general!

and maybe this is less helpful but i find that it’s nice to just interact with fellow f1 fans. do not be afraid to express excitement, ask silly questions about things you have no clue on, and observe how they perceive or discuss teams/drivers/the sport overall, just immerse yourself in spaces that seem to match your energy and you’ll eventually pick up on things without even realizing it!

sorry this got quite long considering i made a nothingburger of an answer but hopefully this helps ❤️ i feel im not the best person to ask because you could say things like purple sector to my face and i’d still only have a vague idea of wtf is happening… i’m just here for the live love laugh of it all 💋 good luck!!!

++ one more addition: if you’re watching a video or listening to something or reading something and you come across a term/phrase/acronym you don’t understand just google it as you’re following along! as much as i say i still don’t get what’s happening half of the time, i do this and it does help tremendously. it’s fun to listen to a driver passionately talk about something and then learn from that

[kinghijinx22]

Binged Dragon Prince season 6 yesterday and loved it (Spoiler thoughts)

Peak writing all the way through, I've loved this show up until this point but season 6 is easily the best one. Love the storytelling and what they are doing with the characters, how the relationships are developing.

And speaking of, many beautifully romantic moments as well. AMAYA AND JANAI WEDDING AAAAAH IT IS SO SWEET THAT IT MADE ME CRY! I love the badass sapphic warrior aunts, still my favorite characters and relationship in the show and then getting an on screen wedding means a lot. Couldn't even be stopped by Janai's conservative twerp of a brother, who hates people getting along and is just mad that his cool lesbian sister found true love with a buff knight lady. Something else that was neat about this side of the story was getting to see that young Queen who had the sapphic parents that died and is maybe be set up with the young King Ezran? Yeah it's been a while and she's a little older now, and it was so good to see her again because she's a neat character.

Also finding Claudia's decent into madness and evil very compelling but I'm hoping that her and Terry get a happy ending together because she has lost so much at this point and deserves it. She was led down a dark path by her evil father and has been left behind. Shout out to Terry for being a real one though, the sweetest bean who has stuck by his girl this entire time and will hopefully be able to turn her around before it's too late. Learning more about Viren's backstory and then getting his big sacrifice after all the evil stuff he's done was compelling although he really did leave Claudia at THE WORST POSSIBLE MOMENT. Soren actually getting to be serious for a bit was very cool, very emotional moments with him.

This season also got me to care more about Rayla and Callum's relationship which is nice. As someone who really didn't care about them in previous season, I think season 6 gave them some REALLY sweet moments and now I'm routing for them. Those star elves that they meet were pretty neat characters as well and had cool designs. VERY happy that Rayla FINALLY got one of her gay adopted dads out of that coin so he can be with his hubby again, and I appreciate that she chose him because her biological parents can still be together in the coin dimension. I imagine she'll be back to get them out eventually as well.

And finally we learn about Aavaros's backstory, and that was very cool in that they were actually able to make him a character that is VERY worthy of sympathy. I started off hating Aavaros and then I flipped to hating the blind dragon guy who totally deserved what he got for killing Aavaros's daughter. Anyway yeah, it was as very enjoyable season with REALLY great writing and I love what they are doing with the characters. Excited for the next one.

[skxawngonearth]

General Skybreaker thoughts (spoilers)

In general, I think Skybreaker is decent.

Map-size and built were what pleasently suprised me the most, and discovering it was just as beautiful as during the main game. Even though the Zeswa lands aren't my favourite from the three clans, the extension in Skybreaker changed that in some regards.

That intro scene was BEAUTIFUL to say the very least (fr, I spammed the camera so much), and in hindsight I just wish there had been more.

The story itself could of course have been more fleshed out (I think all main missions take 4-5h?), but considering the side-missions and the fact that we got a whole new map along with some reworked mechanics, it's a solid experience and (in my opinion) good enough addition. I will defenitely make another post regarding parts of the story and certain changes, but since there's quite a lot I want to talk about.

Character interactions (both logs and conservations) REALLY excelled my expectations. Especially Teylan surprised me so much in a positive (and unexpected) way. I truly hope he'll also be in Secrets of the Spires along with some other characters.

My biggest off turn so far were the bugs to be honest (petty, I know). Hopefully there's soon another update to fix the worst of them (which, knowing there are still some big bugs in the main game, will probably take quite a while)

Last but not least I'm for the very first time pleasently surprised with the skins that came along with the DLC; the cosmetic override looks quite good, but the ikran pack legit made me squeal in joy. I don't know why, but those skins finally look like actual ikran patterns to me, and not like a "gameified" version (if that makes sense lol). (Though I'll wait to see if Kukulope will have them in store at some point first lol)

[silvertsundere]

Silver Talks AniManga (11/02/24)

very sad weeks back to back, losing two good manga in cipher and mma, while other worse series continue along but oh well

green - new series/new to me blue - finale/completed

Anime

Undead Unluck Ep18

it's a shame these past few eps have been so heavy on recapping past stuff, to the point where most of the footage in the ep is reused. hope it isn't a sign there's underlying production issues. considering the nature of the next episode there's prob also gonna be a lot recaps but after we get into the autumn arc proper I hope it goes back to normal or it'll be worrying

Pokemon Horizons Ep39

the last few have been p weak so this one was pretty good in comparison. I haven't played scarvi yet but I've always liked tinktaton's design and this made me like it even more. it's a cute little creature, looking forward to see it being part of the cast in the future

Manga

Super Psychic Policeman Chojo Ch1

hey for a gag manga that was pretty decent, much better than ichigoki at least, not like that's hard. reminded me a lot of saiki but that's for obvious reasons. the author had a manga some years ago, samon the summoner, tho I never read it myself I knew it existed and saw it around sometimes. anyway like I said, this first chap was p decent, suffered a bit from pacing and repeating gags, but when it's the normal lenght it'll probably be fine. I'm not usually the biggest fan of gag manga like this, but this chap alone was a lot more tolerable than ichigoki so I'll be looking forward to maybe being surprised by it

Martial Master Asumi Ch32 (Finale)

it's a real shame mma got axed like this. kawada is a jump veteran and it really shows, everything about the series was a lot more polished and well executed than the other newcomers but it got axed while something like nue, shockingly, continues to truck along. it's a shame jp readers seem to have such bad taste in recent years with good series getting canceled too early while others stick around for way too long. anyway, it's a good manga. art's really good and the fights are cool and easy to follow. the cast, including the rivals, is all likeable. the cameos from hinomaru sumo characters was also cool (the author's previous work). it also portrayed dementia really well and respectfully so that was a nice thing to see. I was originally gonna give it an 8, then decided to bump it down to 7 cause it got cut short and felt like it didn't do everything it could've, but after looking at my scores for some other canceled series I decided to bump it up to 8 after all. looking forward to kawada's next manga. hopefully shueisha puts him in another magazine, doing a seinen or something, where a more mature audience can appreciate him

Two on Ice Ch19

only commenting on this cause the chapter's title was "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" which made me lose my mind cause there's no way it's a reference to that song right? and then I read the chap and it actually is, this shit hit me so outta nowhere it gave me whiplash. I know the author referenced a justin bieber song in an early chap but he's mainstream so while weird to see in a manga I didn't think much of it, unlike this which took me completely by surprise anyway this series should be getting axed for the next serialization series so I'll talk about it again then probably

[kimmiessimmies]

Get to know me - Sims style

Thanks for the tag, @nocturnalazure. I love doing things like this, especially when I don’t have a lot of other updates. 😄 Keeps things active. Long read, so under the cut!

What’s your favourite Sims death?

This is such a weird question to me. I mean, I know there's whole crowds of people who play this game for the sole purpose of killing their Sims off, but I'm so attached to my Sims, their deaths can truly upset me somewhat. So, no, I don't have a "favourite death".

Alpha CC or MaxisMatch?

It truly depends on what I need. I guess I use more MaxisMatch CC though.

Do you cheat your sims weight?

Absolutely. I have them gain or lose weight when it fits their character at that point in their life of their story.

Do you use move objects?

I can't play without it.

Favourite Mod?

Anything NRAAS. I probably would have given up on this game if it weren't for those mods.

First Expansion/Game Pack/Stuff Pack?

For TS3 it was World Adventures

Do you pronounce live mode like aLIVE or LIVing?

Alive.

Who’s your favourite sim that you’ve made?

Are you seriously asking me to choose between my babies? I have so many faves and they change from time to time too. But I guess James is a good contender. He has a very interesting character profile which grew and developed over time. Part of his story is yet to be revealed but is very much alive in my mind. 😄 However, technically I didn't 'make' James. I created his parents and James, along with his sisters, was an EA generated child.

Have you made a simself?

Yes, she's my avatar on here. I recently updated her, because she was still a YA and, as much as I hate to admit it, I'm past that life stage now. 😄 I also updated her hairstyle and clothing to fit the current me a bit more. She's not as good a match to my actual self as some of the other sim selves I've seen people create over the years, but she comes close.

I don't play my selfsim. That feels weird to me. No offence to others who do, though. It's just not my style.

Which is your favourite EA hair colour?

There's a light brown colour I'm partial to at the moment, but without opening my game I have no idea if it's an EA colour or one I've added. Recently I've become annoyed by the reddish shade of EA's darker brown, but a lot of my Sims have that hair colour, so I'm subtly changing it on some of them.

Favourite EA hair?

I have so much CC hair (need to do a purge), that I don't actually remember what hair is EA. 🤣

Favourite life stage?

I mostly enjoy playing my older teens and young adults. I know most players don't distinguish between younger and older teens, but the way I approach the game means there's definitely a difference between younger and older teens. And the older teens and young adults are usually the most interesting because I get to create the most drama during those years.

Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

I used to be both equally. Building up my town and then playing it. But my gameplay changed so now I'm not sure. I play to tell the story and I build to set the scene for the story, mostly.

My extensive town is still the starting point for everything though. Honeycomb Valley means a lot to me and I'm in the process of building up a 2.0 version of my town. Hopefully, I'm able to create a (slightly) lighter version of the town and therefore a smaller-sized save file. I'm by no means an expert builder, but I can create decent (simple) lots.

Are you a CC creator?

No. I do create pictures and custom signs for my own game though.

Do you have any Simblr friends or a Sim Squad?

Yes, I'm pretty sure I do. Back in the forum days, I was rather closely connected to quite a few other Simmers. There are a few people I'm also connected to on regular social media platforms, so we follow each other's personal lives alongside our Sim ones. In July 2014 I met up with my SimSisters Sandy (@aroundthesims) and Sara (@simsaralove) in Paris for a day, which was absolutely brilliant. Especially when you realise we all live in different countries. A few weeks later, Sara visited me in my hometown for a (beach)day. ❤️

Besides these lovelies, there are a couple of people on here whom I follow religiously because I either greatly admire what they do/write/play or because they're just lovely. Or both. 🥰 I guess I consider those connections a virtual friendship in a way too. At least from my perspective.

Do you have any sims merch?

Nope.

Do you have a YouTube for sims?

No, I just have Tumblr and my WordPress blog.

How has your “Sims style” changed throughout your years of playing?

Oh, loads! When I played The Sims 1 and 2 I played rounds of 2 days per family. When The Sims 3 came around I started playing SimYears. At first, my style of playing was just visiting families and going with the flow. Pretty much as I had always done before that. I didn't even take screenshots. It wasn't until I became an active member of the Sims community that I found out there was actually an interest in my Sims and that’s when I started actively taking (pretty bad) pictures of the things I played out and writing stories. Back then, Sandy called her stories "non-stories", which very much applied to me as well, so I adopted that term. Not so much stories, but rather a picture collection of things that occurred with a line of text. Reading my earlier (non-)stories now, I'm often tempted to go back and change them, but I won't.

Gradually, things changed. I started to plan events and happenings, and then playing those out. Characters developed and got more depth. I spent more time telling their individual backstories. It was actually you, @nocturnalazure, who gave me one of the loveliest compliments I've ever received a few years ago on a story and I never forgot that. You said you had always liked my stories, but the more recent ones made you feel more connected to my characters. That meant a lot to me. ❤️

Now, story planning has become my main starting point. I hardly ever have time to play randomly (which I do regret, I loved doing that), but planning and writing first and then playing out the stories absolutely works for me. I even threw my "no poses policy" away. 😄

My different approach to gameplay and storytelling sometimes also makes me a bit anxious though. KimmiesSimmies used to be light, airy, cute and innocent. Even the name is. Lately, what with writing first, the tide is turning. While I can still write "cute", my stories are generally more serious, sometimes quite a bit less innocent than they used to be. Take James for instance. As I mentioned earlier, there's a lot more to be told when it comes to his story. And the things which are about to come up (not soon, but they will) are definitely not light and airy, cute and innocent, but quite deep and even a bit dark. I want to tell these stories, but at the same time, I'm apprehensive about it. Is this still KimmiesSimmies material?

What’s your origin id?

I have no idea.

Who’s your favorite CC creator?

Definitely Sandy, @aroundthesims, when it comes to objects. She always seems to create just what I need. ❤️

How long have you had simblr?

Tumblr told me it was my 10 year anniversary about a week after I returned from my hiatus last March. So, 10 years apparently! I was away for 5 though, so it doesn't really count.

How do you edit your pictures?

Two/three clicks in PicMonkey. And then it'll just have to do.

What expansion/ gamepack is your favourite?

Either Seasons or University

I'm not tagging anyone in particular this time, but if you read this and think, 'hey, that seems fun, I want to do this', please consider yourself tagged. 😉