#but does it really matter? has it ever mattered?
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readwritealldayallnight · 2 days ago
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reader who is flexible / does yoga x simon who gets really flustered watching it? 👀
During those first few months of living together as flatmates, having gone from strangers who happened to have a friend in common to sharing a bedroom wall within 24 hours, you both learned a lot about each other
On your end, you learned that his presence in the flat was a rarity, gone for days if not weeks at a time before coming home. Even then, he usually was only back for short periods of time, most of it spent sleeping
You do discover that he’s an early riser however, much to your chagrin when the sound of his routine post workout shower wakes you up before the sun has ever risen
You learn that he’s a decent enough cook, but will always insist on helping in some way if he finds you in the kitchen working on something, no matter how simple or complicated the dish is
Over time you even find out how he prefers his tea in the morning and when you get the chance, try and surprise him with a warm drink waiting for him after his shower
When you know that he prefers to keep the flat a little cooler than you usually have it, you’ll turn the thermometer down a degree just before he comes home, just as he’s gotten into the habit of turning it back up for you on his way out, the gesture going unspoken between the two of you
Simon also learns a lot about you in the time since you’ve moved in
He learns all about your taste in music, a melody never not playing in the background of whichever room you’re occupying, often telling him the name of a song or artist you can tell he likes from the way his foot will tap or fingers will drum against his thigh
He discovers you’re a bit of a night owl, often hearing you in the kitchen baking some dessert or another at midnight, or talking on the phone with a friend. He never minds though. In one case he wakes up to sweet treats in the morning, and the other he gets to overhear your even sweeter voice chirping and giggling. And if one time a smile of his own graces his lips when he hears you telling your friend how you’re loving the new flat, and your flatmate “isn’t so bad on the eyes either”, then who’s complaining?
He finds out what your favourite take out food is, often surprising you with something on his return home, definitely not blushing under the mask if it earns him a hug or peck on the cheek as thanks
But one thing Simon learns about you early on, something that he thinks about not just at home but on base, in briefings, on missions, on helis and jets and trucks, is how part of your daily routine, is doing fucking yoga in the living room.
He’s been in countless situations most civilians could never even dream up, let alone withstand, and Simon under the mask that is Ghost always stays as cool and collected as any seasoned vet would
But seeing you in sweatpants, or leggings, or even worse when you’re wearing those shorts of yours, strolling into the living room with your yoga mat tucked under your arm, his pants instantly tighten every single time, knowing what’s to come (or rather who’s to c-)
Following along to your instructional video playing on the telly, paying him no mind as he sits in the adjoining kitchen as you bend into position after position, simply doing your nightly routine as you have for years now, unknowingly putting your flatmate through a torture he’s never endured before
Every time he’s lucky enough to witness you stretching your limbs, contorting your body into poses he couldn’t fathom doing himself, he finds his dreams that night filled with the very same images of you, though wearing far less clothing, and in his bed instead of a yoga mat, though he would take you anywhere let’s be honest
He always waits for you to finish your routine, be it a quick 15 minute stretch or a nearly hour long session, he remains and watches you until you leave, before he dares to stand with his arousal on full display through his pants, rushing to his room or bathroom to take care of business
He learns that he’s never felt more intense pleasure at his own hand than when he thinks of you, when he has has your face and body freshly imprinted on his mind as he finishes, imagining the heaven that it must be to have the real thing rather than his calloused fist
It’s interesting you see
You really like Simon, and you like when he’s home, like getting to know him and spend more time with him
And if you happen to learn that when you do your yoga routine out where he can see you, that he suddenly spends a lot more time in the flat than on base, coming home more and more often, no matter how short his stay is… well, who’s complaining?
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fromchaostocosmos · 1 day ago
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Hey OP everything I'm about to say I'm saying out both kindness and frustration.
I'm guessing that you are not Jewish because what you wrote really does not reflect the reality of life for Jews in the USA at that time.
Jews would not be socialites or rubbing elbows with wealthy and elite. And no matter how much any Jews would have stripped away any their Jewish identity they still would have been viewed as classless and lesser by the upper echelon.
Jews were immigrants who primarily did not speak English and mostly were on the east coast.
Fun fact about Jews during this time: Jews who kept Shabbat would have to look for a new job ever week because they would be fired for refusing to work on Shabbat.
As for San Fransisco Jews only came there due the California Gold Rush which happened the mid point of the 1800's.
Jews were heavily involved in Unions and were a major backbone of the Labor movement.
The Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire of 1911 is something that is major keystone is labor rights and movement history. You can not learn about unions and labor laws or anything to do with that without hearing about this. But you know what always gets glossed over, ignored, and often outright erased? The fact that the majority of the workers were Jewish girls and women.
In fact if you look at pictures of many labor marches you will notice that the signs are in Yiddish.
The Jewish identity of the Jewish contributors the unions, labors laws, child labor laws, and labor rights get erased and they become immigrants of X country when their Jewishness played a important role in why they fought for what they did, but also why they faced the discrimination and unfair labor practices they faced.
Also Oscar Wilde would not have had anything to do with anything related to Jews because he was a massive antisemite.
There is this thing that people often do, such as what you have, where they write Jews as having wealth, privilege, and access thinking that they are being inclusive when really what is happening is the furthering of antisemitic tropes and stereotypes as well as a revision of history when this happens in historical settings.
You want to make the Jewish character the prince of the story no problem. Have them be an organizer for a Union and the ball can some kind event or even march or something related to unions.
That can be a connection point between the two of them. The prince title can be a nickname or another connection point where her name, either first or last, is mispronounced by non-Yiddish speakers.
You could even have it be that she is going out and doing out reach to different jobs to get them to unionize/help unionize.
as for views towards their child being gay honestly it would vary with how religious the family was, but also the fact that she was a girl and not a boy it would not as much as a deal due to religious understandings.
While a lot of parts of Yiddish culture has been lost due to the loss of many Yiddish speakers their has existed within this culture a whole queer culture/world though they had their own words to describe it.
This idea has merit and could work it just need to fix the historical inaccuracies and cultural insensitivities in regards to the Jewish parts.
I'm not Chinese so I can't speak to those parts and I don't OP if you are Chinese so again I don't feel it is my place to speak on any of those parts.
Because I do not want Sephardim to left out or forgotten I want to point out that Ashkenazi Jews are not and have not been the only Jews in the USA.
1934 saw San Francisco's first Sephardi Synagogue.
So while yes there was in the 1800's a large influx of Jewish immigration of Ashkenazi Jews to the USA that doesn't mean that there were no Sephardim in the USA already or Sephardim who at the time who were moving around the USA or immigrating to the USA.
I don't want Sephardi history to be ignored or erased.
There is nothing wrong with having the Jewish character be Ashkenazi, I just want to make sure that if I'm accounting for proper historical record in regards to Jews then I'm doing that and leaving out Sephardim.
cinderella remake set in 1880s san francisco where cinderella is a chinese immigrant with bound feet and also she’s a butch lesbian and the prince is a butch lesbian too but she’s a paris-educated german-american socialite and a darling of the transatlantic arts and literary world so the connotations of her gender nonconformity are completely different. oscar wilde is there
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a-s-fischer · 24 hours ago
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"There are no [insert hated nationality or ethnicity here] cilvilians/noncombatants" is standard genocidal rhetoric, by the way. If you are saying this, you are giving a standard justification for genocide. It's right up there with the related tactic of insisting that all members of [insert hated nationality or ethnicity here] are guilty of some collective crime. I want to be clear here. These are both always very wrong, very bad, and very dangerous. It does not matter if you think you are right this time, and the people you are fighting are really evil and deserve it. Everyone who has ever said these things has believed that too.
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neostellarjpg · 3 days ago
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inner mono-dialogue
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the more time i spend being davepeta with you the more i realize almost every single problem in my life was caused by my obsession with being this unfeeling cool dude
but youre cool already
like in the way that actually matters
youre chill and friendly and just nice and thats all there is to it
youre shamelessly yourself even if everybody around you is a jackass and gives you shit for it
youre similar to jade and john in that way
i really envied that about them
but its different actually being at the control panel and feeling where that earnesty comes from
it makes me wanna match your energy and keep that pawsitivity ball rolling even if it ends up being weird or cringe or whatever
fuck man do you know how exhausting it is building yourself social hoops to leap through all the time and when you trip up even once its suddenly the end of the world
what kinda dumbass does that its like dealing with life in hard mode for no reward
fuck that noise
i like your way better
Nepeta's heart burns and shines inside you.
:33 < thank you :))
:33 < but you know
:33 < i dont think doing things your way is unrewarding
:33 < its like
:33 < a shield!
Dave scrunches up with discomfort.
X33 < i dont mean that in an insulting way!
:33 < the fact is that shields are just purractical sometimes
:33 < it doesnt make you cowardly to hide behind one
:33 < in the same way that it isnt cowardly for a predator to hide in the bushes when stalking prey
:33 < its just a way to make sure you dont get hurt!
:33 < purrsonally i found shields too cumbersome
X33 < im a hunter after all!
:33 < and i guess maybe the same goes for my personality
:33 < its not really that im purrticularly brave for being myself
:33 < i just didnt have a say in the matter in the furst place!
:33 < honestly if i had a choice i would have loved to be more like you dave
:33 < you can befriend people almost effortlessly
:33 < and its beclaws youre also just a nice person
Dave recoils in surprise, but Nepeta passionately pushes forward.
:33 < fur real! i f33l it inside you! theres a really strong sense of empathy there
:33 < its just like mine! just smarter, and a bit more analytical
:33 < whenever we encounter someone mew, its like i f33l you lock onto them, and you gather so many insights into their purrsonality without even trying
:33 < and you can use that to bond with others without giving every part of you away
:33 < which unfortunately
:(( < i never really knew how to do
Nepeta sours with unpleasant feelings. Your brows scrunch together with both pain and sympathy.
Nepeta has a big and complex heart. She tried her best to keep it from spilling over, but it always did in the end. And it was embarrassing. It was embarrassing when your friends dismissed your hobbies or focused in on your strange quirks. It was embarrassing when they revealed they knew about your crush on Karkat that you'd worked so hard to hide. And it hurt whenever he would say mean things about you. He and anyone else.
But you always puffed out your chest and sucked it up. You stuck to your guns no matter what. Because it was fun! The things you liked, the people you liked, were fun, and they made you feel good. Why couldn't anyone else see that? And why did it seem like they never gave a single thought to who you were?
You curl in on yourself. Your chest hurts. You suddenly really miss Equius.
And you miss Rose. You miss Jade. You miss John and Karkat and Aradia and Tavros and Terezi and all the others. You miss all the people you can go outside and see whenever you wish, and you miss all the people that you have no hope of ever seeing again. You feel the choral echo of all the times you've ever felt this need for comfort, this thrumming pain searing hot inside you, like hunger wracking your stomach.
You clench your teeth. You remember being on your bed, curled in blankets, not having eaten a proper meal in days. You remember holding your stomach and sneaking to the kitchen, turning your shoulder at every step to look fearfully behind you, only for your fingers to falter hopelessly on the handle of the refrigerator, knowing there was nothing for you inside.
You shake with anger. You know that feeling. The feeling of being chased by something much bigger than you, a hulking silhouette of menacing strength following your scent through the thicket. You'd clutched a beast carcass to your chest, barely breathing as you stalked clumsily through the trees, performance wavering from exhaustion and hunger.
You'd almost died. You'd almost died often. And then after escaping death so many times, it one day claimed you. Casually. Unflinchingly. And the world beat on without you, leaving you stunned by your own insignificance. You'd looked out onto every preceding moment of your life, wondering if there was anything to truly be proud of in the face of your friends accomplishing all these fantastical things. You'd felt lonely before, but after that, you were truly walled off from every single person you knew.
And now, despite everything, you're alive again. Twofold, together with someone.
A warmth coats the ache inside your body. The two parts of you swirl together, feeling and tasting each other, trying to understand themselves.
It feels like a hug.
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blunderpuff · 2 days ago
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Kulabra Designs is also great for interesting, intricate colorwork!! Obviously, your choice of yarn really matters, but Natalia Moreva does incredible colorwork. The best part? Very rarely do you ever have to break your yarn. You might think you're gonna have to weave in a million ends, but you don't.
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(above) Royal Peacock: (Ravelry link/Website link)
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(above) Dripping Ripples (Ravelry link/Website link)
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(above) Taboo (Ravelry link/Website link)
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(above) Squirpool (Ravelry link/Website link)
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(above) Pavlin (Ravelry link/Website link)
She also has a ton of extremely detailed colorwork socks, mittens, hats, and sweaters, but these shawls/scarves allow for such big, striking motifs, I had to show them.
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After scrolling through a bajillion pages of the current fad for greige 10 mohairs held together plain sweaters, I have finally found a designer worth buying patterns from! If only they had this scale pattern on a sweater!
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momotonescreaming · 2 days ago
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There's just something about Tommy and Chim talking after the break up that itches my brain just right.
Like, Tommy assumes he'll never hear from Howie again. Yeah, he loves talking movies and music and references with him. It's always fun and light and their sense of humours mesh. He's really enjoyed being Howie's friend again. But he's Buck's brother-in-law. He'll maybe call Tommy up when he needs help - another unsanctioned flight to save someone - and then they'll fade back into distant ex-coworkers.
He lost touch with all of the 118 when he left for Harbour - and they have more reason to forget him now. He broke Buck's heart. Tommy supposes it doesn't matter that he was their friend as well, that he's not okay, that he broke his own heart in the process.
But Howie's texting him, and calling him, and actually staying in touch. Tommy doesn't say just how much it means to him. That someone stayed. Someone went after him, in a way. Tommy knows that Howie doesn't care about him the way he does the rest of the 118, that Tommy will always be on the outside, but he'll selfishly take this.
One day, when Chim comes round for drinks and a movie night - some classic 80's one they love to quote - they end up talking in the silence of Tommy's room once the credits stop rolling. Really talking.
And Tommy talks about the way Evan said he admired him. That he was proud of how cool and confident Tommy was. Of how Tommy was comfortable in himself and his journey. Except he isn't. He's not cool, he's not confident, he's not someone to be admired. He's not some paragon of gay rights. Gay pride. Someone who paved the way for those who came after. He's desperately wanting to be that confident and proud and admired person and feeling like he doesn't deserve it at all.
He doesn't deserve to be put on the pedestal Buck put him on.
And Chim talks a little about Tatiana. About stealing other's glory, other's stories, because he didn't have his own. He was never the one who did The Maneuver. He never even got a shot at the pedestal. So he was shrouded in other's glory, wrapped in her praise and excitement for things he didn't do.
It helps to hear it, Tommy thinks.
He tells him a little on how he and Maddie got together. How long it took, the ups and downs. No pressure, just lays it all out on the table. And so Tommy does as well.
Tommy admits that it felt like that if Buck did move in, if they did start the idea of forever together, all it would lead to was Buck realising that Tommy isn't the man he tries to be. Pretends to be. He's a man putting on the act, and as soon as he sees past it he's going to hate him. He's going to take back all love and care he gave Tommy and is going to snap his heart in two in the process.
He brought up marriage after he found out just how badly Tommy's previous engagement went. He asked Tommy to move into his loft when Tommy owns his own home. He can't even say he loves him. He's a man who loves research and he doesn't even know what the kinsey scale is.
Tommy's scared that Buck is going to finally research his sexuality, the queer community, history, and realise that Tommy has no part in that. That Tommy opened the doors, and it's time he stepped away.
No one who sees the real Tommy loves him. No one ever has, and he doubts it's going to start now. So he broke it off first, made it hurt, but on his terms. It's more managble that way.
Tommy bows his head, lump in his throat and eyes going misty. He feel's Howie's hand resting comfortingly on his back.
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sun-flower-children · 3 days ago
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Academic Rivals! Viktor x Reader
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Academy Student!Viktor x gn!Reader
Here's my take on this idea that has been rumbling around my brain especially with all the new viktor fics ( yall are doing the lords work)
not proof read + a lot longer than I thought it would be, sorry lmao
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You were the Academy's top student known to be the top of the class with the highest scores always exceeding expectations.
Your creative thinking and problem solving is what normally got you the spotlight of attention within academia.
Naturally after spending your first two years of the Academy eating up the attention and receiving offers from multiple elite members of society, industry and government certainly made your resume/reputation an intimidating one.
Your peers knew you to be competitive and ambitious wanting to be the one to set the curve; extensive research projects, etc.
This did however make you a poor teammate with your passionate ideas that one of them could dream of keeping up with you. Plus you would steal the leadership role from them to implement the changes you'd want.
You had gotten used to pattern created for you with a bright future ahead.
Even if you were getting kind of bored of knowing that your worst idea would still allow you to keep your rank.
Then all the sudden a new student joins the Academy
It didn't bother you much until you started seeing a drop in your scores and ranking thus creating a rivalry with this mysterious student.
It was not until you and Viktor shared a class that you realized who your academic opponent was
Thus starting a new chapter of your academic career with renewed passion upon knowing there was finally someone that could equal you in skill.
Fighting for everything within the academic realm that was available
Now neither of you had ever officially been introduced or carried a proper conversation instead replacing regular communication with pointed looks of smugness or confidence.
You would have angry fits in private realizing the margin that you had lost to Viktor
Long days and nights spent gaining a potential advantage over your rival.
Your friends would point out how you would almost pop a vein just describing the way that he would "usurp the first place on an exam all because of a technicality"
Honestly when you would get really into it you were sure that you hated this guy: coming out of nowhere with no prior history and just takes over everything you have worked hard to establish.
Who does he think he is????
Now all your professors, namely Himerdinger paid close attention to this rivalry. It's entertaining watching your top 2 students hash it out and creating things they would not have without this push.
Himerdinger seeing how honed in your other skills were decided to create a project for the class specifically targeting you both.
A partnered project
One that could not change neither the topic, the partner or the day that it was to be presented; everything set in stone.
" Learning the skills needed in a lab is one thing but the most important and impactful discoveries have always been those created through teamwork." Himerdinger would share one fateful day as he put up the paper listing the groups.
It did not even cross your mind that you would have been paired with Viktor and after looking at the poster turned around a looked at him.
Viktor was still sitting in his front row seat in the lecture room patiently waiting for the crowd to dissipate before getting up to look at the paper.
He continued to wrap up whatever notes he had taken as you step up to him.
"We are assigned partners for this project." you say very matter a factly.
Viktor looks up to you with a small smile," Well then, we should set up times to work on the project together. What times work best for you?"
You were taken aback by his nonchalance.
Did he really not care that he was partnered with you? Did he not see you as significant enough to mention the obvious tension? Did he not even see you as a rival but a regular student below him???
After a short pause you share what time you are normally at the library.
As you share the details he finished packing up his stuff.
Looking back up to with another slightly bigger smile (what is his game???) " I'll see you then. Tomorrow at table four."
With that he leans on his cane and leaves you in the quiet empty classroom to deliberate your next moves.
That night you started working on the project creating multiple schemes, ideas, and conceptual ideas that could be used for the project put forth.
You went to bed hoping to finally force him to recognize you as the rival that you were as he seemed so dismissive before.
You showed up to the library at the arranged time to see Viktor sitting peacefully at a study table thumbing through multiple volumes seemingly looking for a specific piece of information.
"Good Morning." you started as you walked up to him.
Without even looking up he returns the same early day greeting and places yet another volume aside and opening a new one.
Raising an eyebrow that the attitude you place your things on the other side of the table.
"I was thinking last night about this project and had written down some ideas that I believe that we should pick from as our approach." you open the discussion with no changed behavior from your supposed teammate.
You continue, " I have already taken the liberty to research them, for your convenience, and have supplied preliminary data for each one. Honestly any of these would resolve the problem raised by our projects prompt with their main difference being how creative you wanted to get with it."
Viktor has created yet another pile of abandoned books that didn't meet his mysterious criteria all the while not regarding you properly.
Your felt your self becoming more warmer as you felt the irritation pool into the oil pit of anger you have created surrounding him.
"It's considered polite to respond or at the very least acknowledge when someone is talking to you. Or are you so focused on your book hunt you aren't ever looking at the person you are supposed to be completing this project with."
Viktor sighs putting the book currently in his possession down and looks up to you.
"It was not my intention to be rude I am just looking for a specific volume that has a unique perspective on the concept we learned a week ago but the title is slipping my mind."
Sighing you sit down and observe the collection of books created on the table.
"I'm going to go on a limb here and assume that you only really remember that the color of the book was dark blue?"
Viktor chuckled," Observant and yes I am."
"Well you aren't going to find it in the library considering there is only one copy of it. That author's take was considered almost heretic."
"Ah, so you are familiar with the book I am referencing?"
"It would be strange if I didn't considering that I brought it with me to our meeting. I checked it out a week ago because it piqued my interest and also happened to align with this assignment."
You hold it out over the table as Viktor sighs again running a hand through his hair.
The meeting ended up going on for longer than expected.
You were surprised to find that he has a similar perspective to yours and understood your vision from the multiple proposals that you had created.
Further analysis showed some minor flaws that would otherwise be overlooked by other people; but neither of you too were not going to settle for anything less than perfection.
The more that the two of you poured over ideas, equations, concepts, and plans until you came up with a path that pleased you both with only one variable that needing some testing.
Viktor offered to go his smaller private study that he had already set up a similar experiment (he was also trying ideas out the night before)
Walking side by side down the hallways was a strange feeling.
Not because you were walking slower that your default rushed walking pace but because this person that you had, honestly, really hated and rationalized that was cheating somehow....wasn't.
You hated to admit it as you continued to listen to his rambling on of the missing component that they needed to figure out.
(Shit...he is actually just naturally brilliant)
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part 1 | part 2 >
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everyonewooeverywhere · 3 days ago
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PUNSIHMENT AND AFTERCARE W/ YUNHO
pairing: dom!yunho x female!reader
rating: 18+
content/warnings: female reader, overstimulation, nothing super explicit
NSFW 18+ | MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED
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there are a couple ways that punishments can go when you break yunho's rules. the first being rejection. no matter how much you beg and plead, he won't give you any of his attention. you disobeyed him, so now you have to suffer the consequences of your actions. and you can dress up in that pretty new set he bought you, and you can slide onto his lap all you want, but he's just going to pretend you're not there. letting you breakdown to tears in babbling apologies. crying into his shirt that you're so sorry that you disobeyed him. and all you want is for him to touch you and hold you and kiss your cheeks while he tells you how much he loves you, but he'll just raise an eyebrow at you and ask if you think whining will really help you get your way.
aftercare: he's so intentional about giving you extra and specific attention. making sure that you know absolutely and for certain that he wants you. that he cherishes you. and that you are the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to him. he probably still won't fuck you, but that's because he wants to only focus on his words. giving you the reassurance you need to be sure that his actions were just a part of the scene.
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another way he'll punish you is quite the opposite. yunho has always be quite the sucker for overstimulation. it used to be something that would happen every once in a while on accident. but when he's using it as a form of discipline it is very intentional. will usually bend you over his lap. starting slow with the foreplay, but ramping it up the moment you start getting vocal. you usually cum for or five times from his fingers alone before he removes you from his lap. and the worst part about this punishment for you is that he won't actually fuck you. he'll reach into the nightstand instead. picking from a variety of toys to make you even more of a mess. he does this for two reasons. one, he doesn't have to worry about his own stamina, and he can push you a little further each time without having to monitor himself or hold back. and two, well it's not really a punishment if he lets you get drunk off his dick, is it baby? he will push you until he knows you physically can't cum anymore (or you safe word).
aftercare: a bath. will help to the bathtub before filling it and slipping in behind you. will take as long as he needs to clean you up. making sure to kiss nearly every inch of your body making sure to ease any pain. will carry you out of the bath and dry you off. brushing your hair and kissing your lips every time he gets the chance. and will literally hold you all night if you need it so that you can wake up in his arms and know that he loves you dearly.
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@swimmingkpopblog @oddracha @drinkingrumandcocacola @minaateez @funnyvxlentine 
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destroyed-void · 2 days ago
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Reblogging w thr most devastating comment someone left on here-
i like a combination of the two ideas - on one hand, yes this is just a husk Viktor's controlling. I wouldn't be surprised if *most* of Jayce is gone - at the very least, he has been stripped of all agency and autonomy he has to make Viktor feel less crushingly alone, and any will he could possibly have does nothing to help him.
On the other hand... I don't think Viktor would need to move the eyes in their sockets when all he really has to do is have husk!Jayce let go of the hammer after moving it forward a little. it's... not a process that requires that much hand-eye coordination, so there's no need to access line-of-sight.
instead, I like to take a third, secret, more fucked up option:
*jayce's consciousness is stuck helpless in that body.*
I think this could work narratively for one particular reason; for as much as Viktor wishes to assimilate Jayce, the thing that makes him love Jayce so much is that he's himself. Not just a will Viktor bent to his control. So, on a *subconscious* level, he wants Jayce to say as his own unique person that will always be at Viktor's side.
...The problem with this. is that, on a *conscious* level, Viktor is trying to assimilate everyone under his control into their absolute perfected selves who will never cause conflict or harm or suffering ever again. All bodies and beings within the Arcane are *entirely* subsumed as part of his network, no longer unique or special or separate from him. Meaning that, in all the ways that matter to Viktor, Jayce would no longer be around.
and, as such, he tries to have both things at once without even realizing it. Jayce's mind is left intact, but his physical form and presence in the Arcane can only follow Viktor's will. So Jayce's mind is shunted out of the Arcane and sealed away helpless inside his old form, that he can only move at all when he doesn't go *against Viktor's will* as Viktor actively controls it (thus shifting eyes). Viktor never realized this.
Omg guys??? The eye movement??? Are you telling me Jayce is alive in there??? And are you telling me this means Viktor chills with him so he won’t be alone for eternity???
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sinofwriting · 1 day ago
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Insane Person - Max Verstappen (I ❤️ MILFS verse)
Words: 667 Summary: Max wants to be sure he can give Pan kids. (Part of the I ❤️ MILFS verse) Note(s): Takes place during the original I ❤️ MILFS fic, before Max finds out Pan’s age. Max is insane btw, this has been a blurb idea since I wrote the original fic and finally it has been written so enjoy, lol.
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Masterlist | Support Me! | I ❤️ MILFS verse
“I’d love to give Logan a sibling or two.”
The words so soft had made his heart speed up as soon as he heard them and now thinking about them, letting them play on repeat.
It’s early in their relationship, though they haven’t yet talked about it yet, no matter how much Max is dying to do so. But Max wants to be the one that she gives Logan siblings with.
Which is why he’s sitting in front of his computer and looking at medical studies.
A lot of it is going over his head. The most schooling he sat through was the first four or five years of it. He can grasp engineering, anything to do with cars and their data, but medical terminology goes over his head.
He powers through, he doesn’t know Pan’s exact age, his mother would smack him over the head if he even thought to ask her age, but she’s got to to be mid to late thirties if not early forties considering Logan is twenty.
The studies say she’d be fine getting pregnant, shouldn’t have trouble conceiving, and his cheeks burn at the word, at the image it puts in his mind. They haven’t quite got their, but they’ve gotten close. They throw out the term geriatric pregnancy which makes him flinch because forty wasn’t old, at least not if you weren’t a driver and to see it be called something like that felt harsh, rude. Another one calls it advanced maternal age which really isn’t any better, but it’s just relieving to see that’s still possible. And then a study mentions that if people are having trouble conceiving that not only does the person birthing need to get checked, but both do and a new panic takes over his brain.
What if when it came time to try, he was the problem? It would really be his luck. Things had been going very well for the past few years, it would be his luck that he couldn’t give the woman he loves more kids.
And Logan wanted siblings, the panic grows as he remembers Logan chiming in that he’d love some siblings. Oh god, what if he failed in giving Logan siblings? He wanted the younger driver to like him, to really like him.
His fingers act quickly, wanting to know how he can know if he can have kids and the results make him blink because it couldn’t be that easy.
He just had to provide a sample in a cup?
Max’s brain struggles to compute that after just reading everything that women have to go through to get their fertility checked.
His hand goes to his phone, he rarely if ever called his doctor, but this was important.
He goes through the motions of confirming he is who he is, wondering how weird it must be for other people to do this for him before he finally gets asked why for the purpose of the appointment.
“I want to check to see if I can have kids.”
“Okay, are you and your partner having trouble conceiving?”
His cheeks burn, “We aren’t trying yet. I just want to make sure that it’s possible on my end.”
“Okay, it’s a simple procedure at our clinic and we could see you in the next three days if that works for you at any time we are open.”
“That’s perfect.”
“Alright, we’ll see you in a few days, Mr. Verstappen.”
He gets the results back five days after his appointment, an email sitting in his inbox, and he forces himself to take a deep breath before finally opening it.
There are words he doesn’t know, ones he doesn’t really want to think about, but there at the end, a note from his doctor that says everything looks great, and he shouldn’t have troubles getting someone pregnant and his fist goes in the air, a quiet but excited yes leaving him.
He could give Logan siblings and Pan more kids, thank fuck.
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kiemiu · 3 days ago
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headcanons of chris dating a lavish hyper feminine gf | ( fem!reader ) fluff + soft hours. established relationship headcanons wc 943 (library) + (request)
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boyfriend!chris who loves that you have standards. as someone who grew up with a certain lifestyle, you made it clear to chris before you started dating him that you don't settle and have pretty high standards. expecting him to take a step back because most men do when they realize they can't afford you, he surprisingly doesn't. he just smiles with low eyes and says "i can handle whatever you throw at me, mama."
boyfriend!chris who reaches for his wallet without hesitation every single time. before you can even set all of your items on the counter, he's pulling out his wallet. when you go out to eat together, he pulls his wallet out as soon as the waiter mentions the check. it doesn't really matter where you are and what you're buying, he's gonna be the one to pay for it. doesn't even entertain the idea of you paying for something by yourself and will actually roll his eyes at you when you start to reach in your purse.
boyfriend!chris who pays for your mani pedi every time you go to the nail salon. all you have to do is offhandedly mention your acrylics growing out and he'll give you his card to go and get your nails done. every now and then when he has the free time, he'll go get it done with you. he usually finishes his treatment before you, so when he does he likes to just sit next to you and gossip with you and your nail tech. if you mention that you're hungry and the nail tech still has a long way to go with your nails, he'll pick up something to eat for the both of you and even the nail tech if they want anything. without thinking twice he'll feed you so you don't disrupt the nail tech while they're working. he'll get really shy whenever the other people in the salon point it out and coo over how doting he is.
boyfriend!chris who also chooses your nail design. he's consistently been choosing your nail color and design ever since you've gotten together and he takes the job very seriously. he'll genuinely get offended if you let someone else choose your nail design or if you get a touchup without letting him know. besides that, he loves to get matching designs, even if it's something as simple as having each other's initials on your ring fingers.
boyfriend!chris who loves to watch you get ready in the morning. if you ever have somewhere to be and he doesn't, he likes to follow you around like a baby duck and watch you pamper yourself. he'll hold your hair up for you while you search for a hair tie, he'll blow dry your hair for you, he'll choose your perfume, he'll even pick out your outfit if you let him. if he's not doing that, he'll just watch you do your makeup in fascination and whisper compliments, usually something along the lines of. "beautiful before and after." never fails to ask you for a kiss after you put on lipgloss, even though you'd think he'd hate the sticky feeling, he actually loves it and won't wipe it off even long after you're gone.
boyfriend!chris who keeps a compact mirror on him just in case you need it. when you're together, you try not to be on your phones as much, especially when you're out spending one on one time together so to avoid you looking at your phone he carries a small compact mirror around for whenever you feel the need to check your makeup. you could just carry it in your purse, but he prefers to do it. he says it'll be safer in his hands, especially since it's made out of glass but the real reason is that he likes you asking him for help.
boyfriend!chris who carries all of your bags. it could be groceries, shopping bags, or luggage, it doesn't matter. he'll always do the heavy lifting as well as the easy lifting. all you have to do is be pretty for him, he enjoys the view. if he sees you carrying something he'll take it from you without hesitation, especially if it looks heavy. most of the time he doesn't even realize he's doing it, he just feels the need to grab whatever you're holding. what if you chip a nail? he can't have that happen, you'd be so upset, and what kind of boyfriend would he be to not keep you happy?
boyfriend!chris who is always pleasantly surprised when you buy him stuff in return. he genuinely enjoys spoiling you, and the way you always show appreciation for him and the things he does for you always makes him feel fulfilled as your boyfriend. so, whenever you give him something back that's not affectionate doting, he's always pleasantly surprised and really appreciative.
boyfriend!chris who loves to kiss your attitude away. you've accumulated a bit of an attitude due to everything being handed to you, so whenever something doesn't go your way, you have no qualms about showing how annoyed you are about it. the platform uggs you wanted went out of stock? well, chris is right next to you to kiss the pout away and promise that he'll get them for you as soon as they're back in stock. your nails didn't turn out the way you wanted them to? no worries, chris will take you to get them redone tomorrow. he's always there to smother his pouty baby in kisses.
boyfriend!chris who is completely wrapped around your perfectly manicured finger.
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' 𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 ' 🥡: @emely9274 @ginswife @chrisstvrns @conspiracy-ash @sturnina @lovetaylorrussellgrr @nervoussagittarius @sacaydia @chrissturnsss @hearts4werka @oliviagirlsworld @koilaniazul @starsforu @sturn777 @sturniolosiphone @chrisfavoritewhore
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dark-raven-666 · 3 days ago
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For the homicipher men falling in love you made..may I ask if you will make a part 2 was really getting all giddy seeing your post but then mr.hood wasn't there 😭 man deserves some love too
Homicipher x reader (gn) headcanons.
How they love p 2
Warnings: Mr Hugeface is toxic
✧༺♥༻✧✧༺♥༻✧✧༺♥༻✧
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Mr. Hood
When he first met you he felt like needed to protect you, like you were a tiny creature that was so helpless and needed him.
He never expected you to come back and thank him each time.
"Thanking me? Why? "
It seems that no one there is kind or even grateful, he's never been thanked. It feels nice, warm.
Then you do it again, and again, and again.
He expected you to leave, use his help and never come back, but you did.
As the rest he never realizes what love is bit he feels protective of you.
Mr Crawling is too weak and Mr machete runs away. He's the only one capable of protecting you
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Mr. Machete
Now this guy can't handle weaklings or kind soft people, sorry not sorry.
If you can't keep up with him and fight why would he bother with you?
Now let's say you can fight. He's intrigued. Very intrigued.
It takes you very long time even land a hot on him but when you do.. His heart goes doki doki and he immediately respects you (loves you)
He will demand to fight again and each time you win he will be bashful instead of upset.
Wow you got a hit on THE Mr machete.
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Mr. Silvair
You're a human in the ghost realm so you've already got his attention.
He wants to research you and push you to your limits.
He does ask for consent to work on you but if you get violet you're ending up like Mr chopped.
He has clear boundaries and needs you to understand that he is stronger than you. You're the subject, he's the researcher.
Now if you get through all of that he'll be kind enough to give you anesthesia when researching.
One day you wake up with an actual heart on your bedside table. That's his gratitude. Never mention it again or he'll never love you again.
From then on he considers you two lovers and will sometimes give you small smiles as he works and teach you stuff.
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Mr. Hugeface.
Tiny human, so fun, so cute.
Literally incapable of love only obsession.
If you're kind enough to obey him and be his little doll. Be obedient in your room maybe he'll get you a few gifts, a book or two.
He's so childish and will throw a tantrum if his doll is not perfect. How dare you have messy hair!?
Will get you clothes and style your hair like you're a Barbie.
That's your life now eternally. You're a doll. And perfect dolls are always pretty and happy.
All throughout toxic.
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Mr. Stitch
This man is perfect for maladaptive daydreamers.
You met him when he took you from Mr Crawling, well kidnapped you, but when you get in that bus, you travel in the abyss with him.
Ever since then, that became you two's favorite hobby. To get on the bus, share stories, cuddle a bit, he will Yap to no end and tell you of his adventures and how he plans to take you on many!
He shows love by making you little things, like old cloth you found? It's a dress now. He isn't called Mr stitch for no reason.
You were heitamt at first but then the world of daydreams and the abyss with no stress takes you like a dream.
You love him just as much.
He thinks you're a fun person who treats him well and laughs with him.
Most of your time is spent giggling at his jokes and he likes that.
No matter where or when he picks you up, when he does you're going to adventure.
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yanderedrabbles · 1 day ago
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I’m 🐰 Anon >:3
How would the yandere boys act with a reader that has body dysphoria? A reader who starves herself (I’m going through a hard moment and really wanted to know how they wound react, I wanted, you know, some comfort maybe-)
Oh baby, I'm so sorry. I know exactly how much ana sucks when she comes to visit. But don't worry, the boys will try their best. Unfortunately, their best isn't always very smart.
Skin and Bones - yandere boys when you won't eat
Yandere! Cowboy is predictably mean about it. He'll tug at the hem of your sundress and say he doesn't give a damn how your clothes fit, as long as you keep taking them off for him. At night, he'll bury his face between your thighs and nip at the tender flesh. "You're mine - your pretty cunt, your pretty smile, your pretty body. You don't get to starve what's mine, got it?"
Safe to say, he watches you like a hawk after that. At every meal, he makes sure your plate is sparkling clean. And if you even think about throwing up, he'll have his belt off in a second to teach you a hard lesson about abusing his property.
Yandere! Soldier thinks you're doing it to piss him off. "What? You're worried about being heavy?" He'll grab your waist and toss you over his shoulder in one smooth move, like you weigh even less than his gear. Smack your ass and say that no matter what you weigh, nothing can stop him from throwing you around.
"Now stop insulting me. съесть что-нибудь."
And eat something.
Yandere! Boyfriend understands better than you'd think. He cooks you something incredibly healthy and low calorie, a safe food. He'll stand behind you as you push it around your plate, his chin resting on your head and his fingers kneading your thighs. "C'mon baby, just a little bite?" He'll promise that if you finish it, he'll eat up too. And he doesn't mean food.
Yandere! Incubus notices it when he comes to you at night. He's attuned to every part of you in a way only demons can be. You're hungry, you're ravenous and there's some dark ugliness festering at the heart of it. In the morning, the handsome young priest stops at your table and tells you that you've been looking ill lately, that you should definitely eat some more. He'll tug at his rosary and remind you, "When the flesh hungers, so does the soul."
Yandere! Desert Bandit doesn't understand it. Food is hard to come by, so why are you turning it down? When you explain it to him, he scoffs. "The desert sent you to me. Why would I want to change such a precious gift?"
If you insist on being stubborn, he'll lunge at you and wrestle you under him.
"I've dreamt of you, just as you are."
Maybe he can show you exactly how perfect you are to him and if not...He can always hold you down and feed you himself.
Yandere! Academic Rival will order a ton of expensive dishes and have them delivered right to his apartment. Everything you've ever mentioned wanting to try. He'll rest a fork at your lips and smirk at you. And be suffocatingly condescending when he says, "I thought you were smarter than this. Now open up and prove me right."
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reignpage · 2 hours ago
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Piercer!Geto
Ducati 350 Desmo : rev my engine
Contents: 18+ mdni, huge foreplay, teasing, insight into that one text between modern au!Suguru and reader, inappropriate workplace behaviour, not proofread (literally wrote this just now and felt an urge to post immediately)
A giggle escapes you. 
Your boss just texted you to come to his office for a consultation on a possible tattoo. And you’re biting your lip, walking over to his door, weaving around the different stations of your fellow co-workers who simply grin at you. They have eyes, they can see he treats you differently, see that he’s softer, more patient around you. 
And they definitely see the blush that stains your cheeks every time he winks at you or breezes past. You just hope they can’t see you press your thighs together when he places his large hand on the small of your back and whisper an ‘excuse me, pretty’ in your ear.
It’s a little silly to be getting so worked up over your boss — your sister would certainly not approve, but she’s not much better than you — but your boss is tall, dark and handsome. Anyone in your position would feel the same way. 
You hear him say ‘come in’ when you knock, so you slip inside and close the door with a nervous smile. Suguru is sat behind his desk, hair tied up into a bun at the back, flicking through a portfolio. His leather jacket is strung on the back of his chair, tight black shirt clinging to his lean but muscular body in a way that makes you jealous. 
“Hey, boss.” Your voice has a slight waver to it, a nervous tremor that catches his attention. He looks up through his thick lashes, a small smile pulling at his lips. Beckoning you to sit across from him, he leans back in his chair, seemingly taking in your figure. 
Thank goodness you stole your sister’s pink sweater with a low v-line dipping to your cleavage. The simmering look he gives you makes facing her wrath so worth it. 
Sitting down, you clasp your hands in your lap. You’ve been in his office many times, but those were quick moments: giving him coffee, informing him of an emergency or a sudden cancellation, grabbing something from his shelves. But you’ve never quite sat and basked in the slight vanilla smell in the air, never been on the opposite side of his desk like a client, and you’ve certainly never faced his flirtations head-on like this. 
Suguru sits up, leaning on his elbow and tilting his head at you with a patient smile. A lock of hair follows with him and you want to feel it. Gosh, his hair looks so pretty. You wonder if it’s as silky as it looks. 
“How have you been finding working here, Y/n? I hope you’re finding it easy enough to balance your studies with your part-time job.”
You pout at the paternal tone he’s taken on. “It’s great. Everyone is so nice. No matter how many times I mess up, no one gets mad at me. Everyone’s so patient, I really feel at home.”
He nods, smile widening ever so slightly. “Good, good. I’m glad to hear that.”
The pink polish on your pointer finger is flaking off as you scratch. You’re fidgeting, suddenly feeling alert and aware of every movement, every shuffle outside the door as people walk past. It feels wrong to be hidden away like this with everyone still working just behind that door. It isn’t even locked. 
“So,” Suguru begins, a teasing lilt to his voice, “you want a tattoo.”
“I want to be tattooed by you,” you hurriedly correct. Why did you do that? That sounded so desperate. You wince but he only smiles wider, like he knows exactly what you’re thinking. 
You’re too obvious. 
Suguru opens a drawer and places the leather sketchbook you found the other day. It’s thick, with scraps of paper poking out, and held together by an elastic band. The only thing in his entire office, and in his entire studio, that is messy. It feels scandalous, like you saw a peek through his soul and he had let you. Your heart clenches. So does your pussy. 
Nope.
Behave, you tell your body.
When you catches his gaze, he motions you over to his side. So you stand, pulling your short skirt down as discreetly as possible, and round his desk. This feels even more scandalous. You’re on the boss’ side, seeing the world from his perspective. He’s still sat down whilst you stand beside him, shuffling on your feet awkwardly. 
Then he pushes his chair back ever so slightly to give you space to lean forward and look at the page he’s opened. It’s of the dragon you saw. A pearly white, elegant looking creature with captivating yellow eyes. Its body is twisted, curling as it takes flight, rising through the heavens. You had no idea tattoos could be so beautiful. 
“I’m happy to broaden your perspective, pretty girl,” he replies. 
You hadn’t even realise you said it out loud. You blush again. 
You’re looking down on him, and he’s leaning back in his chair, legs spread in the loose trousers he wears, but it’s settled on his thick thighs, revealing the delectable muscles there and the bulge you’re trying not to look at. 
When you glance back up at him, he’s pressing his lips together like he’s trying not to laugh. Heat rises up your neck to your face. You should be fired.
Clearing your throat, you point to the dragon. “I want that one.”
“Yeah?” He’s studying you, no doubt trying to determine if you’re worthy. “Can you handle being tattooed, pretty? You’ll have needles poking you, will you manage?”
It’s clear he’s trying to test your limits, which is fair because you don’t have a single tattoo, unlike everyone else in the studio. You stand out with all your pastels and pinks contrasting with the sharp metals and ink of the place. But Suguru thinks you’re a scaredy cat. He thinks you’d tap out immediately and cry home about how he was too rough or too mean. 
You raise a brow, trying to imitate that arrogant look your sister always has. “I think I’ll be able to handle whatever you give me,” and then you add, almost like an afterthought, “boss.”
Always smiling, Suguru lifts a hand and curls two fingers. You shuffle between his spread legs, slotting in so perfectly it makes the tips of your breasts tingle. It’d be so easy to just kneel between them, to take out that part of him you’ve been dreaming of since he interviewed you, and ask for his cum like a good girl. Or better yet, to just plop yourself down on his lap and ride him to oblivion. 
You don’t do either, of course. 
It’d be wrong to do any of that with your boss, though you’re sure you wouldn’t regret a thing. But you have no experience with men. Your fingers, and a couple times a pillow, have been your only company on night where the frustration has boiled over. 
Suguru runs his gaze up the length of your body, from the smooth thighs peaking from your skirt, to your waist, to the nipples pebbling under your thin sweater, and the curves rounding out beyond the neckline, your neck, and your face. Then back down again. 
You gulp. 
There are phantom grazes running along your skin, tickling your skin wherever it goes. It’s making you ache between your legs and you want to rub yourself along his thigh, or his face, or both. How is he doing that?
Slowly, like a panther stalking its prey, he straightens his posture and his hand lifts. You’re both watching his fingertips graze the side of your thigh at a snail’s pace, as if intent on carving the feeling of your skin to memory. 
Your heart is pounding in your ribcage, threatening to burst out and dance on his desk. It’s pulsing at a beat that matches the down at the apex of your thighs. Can he hear it?
His eyes meet yours. His smile is gone. That cool temperament has disappeared, replaced with a strain in his eyes, in the way it flickers between yours. And when you gasp as his fingers reach the hem of your tight skirt, feeling the soft pudge, his eyes narrow. 
“Where do you want it?”
Through the haze, you barely hear what he’s saying. You stutter out, “Anywhere you want, boss.”
That was the wrong thing to say apparently because in a flash he’s standing behind you, pinning your hips to the desk with his own. Oh goodness, his body feels so firm against yours. And he smells so good, like thrill and danger wrapped in one. 
Your head falls back against his chest when his hands grip your hips, fingers splaying over your tummy, so close to where you want them but still not close enough.  
His lips scrape the shell of your ear and his deep timbre enters you and vibrates your very being. “Be careful, angel. I might just brand you everywhere.”
Head tilting to the side, you’re gasping at him. “Brand?”
You breathed it out like it was the dirtiest word in the English vocabulary, like he had just suggested he spit in your mouth in front of the clients. But when you make eye contact, he raises his hand to lift your sweater just a little, thumb settling on your bare skin, all warm from the blood rushing through you. 
You’re growing dizzy, so lightheaded you hardly remember where you even are. That must be why he has an impression that looks so innocent, like he hadn’t said anything at all. You’re mistaken. The rush is ruining your perception. 
Suguru leans down and he’s so close, you’re just a tiptoe away from feeling his lips against yours, from tasting him and exploring anything and everything he’s willing to give. His hands are burning his imprints and you already know you’ll feel them later when you’re no doubt sliding your own hand into your soaked panties. 
But then he pulls away just as there’s a knock at his door. 
You hear Miguel’s muffled voice and you scramble back from Sugar, who’s gracefully sitting back down like nothing’s happened. Your mind is frantically trying to catch up, and it leaves you breathless. 
Stumbling over to the door, you fix your sweater and pull down your skirt hurriedly before opening the door to see the man polite smile at you and then at the boss. 
He enters and you exit, the door remains open. But when you sneak one last glance at the room, you see Miguel admiring something on the wall, and then you catch Suguru’s heated gaze, his stare not faltering even as he presses a hand to his crotch and adjusts himself like a promise. 
You walk back to your desk at the front of the shop and desperately try to catch your breath just in time as a pink-haired man you recognise as being a member of the student council and a friend of your sister introduces himself and ask to see Suguru on a ‘personal matter’.   
It’s as if you’re moving on auto-pilot, nodding with a polite smile and gesturing to the direction of his office unnecessarily because the man’s already walking off. Your phone pings and you open it to see a text from your friend about how she’s on her way. 
You exhale one last time, replying something to her and ignoring the embers flickering on the places your boss has touched. 
And then you giggle. 
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strawberryblue-blog · 23 hours ago
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Hector fort nsfw alphabet
A to Z —Hector Fort.
summary: NSFW alphabet with Héctor.
warnings: YES. +18. smut, headcanon.
words count: +1k
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A - after care (what is it like after sex?)
He doesn't usually fall asleep quickly, he always waits for you to be the first to fall asleep. He definitely likes to watch you sleep, so he probably falls asleep after you while looking at you like an idiot.
B - body part (favorite part of your body and his)
He's all in. He has no favorite part because he's a confident guy who works to love himself no matter what. On you, he could say the same thing but he loves your mind much more. The way you express yourself, how you feel things, how you love.
C - cum (anything about cumming)
You usually use condom. You are still starting out and don't want to make any mistakes, so for now he will use a condom until you decide to use birth control or other methods. But that's fine for him.
D - dirty secret (some dirty secret)
Probably videotaping himself while he fucks you or fucking you in front of a mirror to watch you squirm for him.
E - experience (experience in sex)
Basic. What is necessary. He's still learning because of his age and the time since he's had sex.
F - favorite position (to fuck you)
He likes it when you ride him but he is definitely in control, holding your waist and marking your movements. He may also like it when you ride him in reverse.
G - goofy (how serious is he during sex?)
It's not that serious but it depends on the situation. If you see each other often, he will definitely play with you for a while and might even joke around during sex. But if you are needy because you have been away from each other, then it will be serious.
H - hair (how do he/you take care of his/your privacy?)
He doesn't have much hair in general but his preference is to shave it all off. As for you, he might like you to do it too but he would never judge you or care if you ever forget or he has time. He's not interested in that way.
I - intimacy (what is it like during sex?)
He is usually calm, direct and deep. He likes to take his time to show you his love but sometimes he can get crazy.
J - jack off (masturbation, how much do he/you masturbate?)
He used to do it more often but since he's had you he's cut down.
K - kink (fetishes during sex)
Fucking you in the shower, hot, wet and smothering. Love the sensation. Also bite your neck, bite your tits, pull your hair back, look you straight in the eyes.
L - location (places to have sex)
He prefers safe and private places. Where it's just you and him and no one can disturb you. Preferably beds or sofas but if you want he could fuck you wherever you like.
M - motivation (what excites him/you?)
Honestly any movement of yours is motivation for Hector, maybe seeing you in the mornings half naked, giggly and clingy with him, turns him on a lot. Also when you wear his clothes. He really loves it when you wear his shirts, pants or even underwear.
N - no (what wouldn't he do with you?)
No to anything that could intentionally hurt you, he could never hurt you in any way, even if it's a game. He just can't.
O - oral (how does he like to give/receive?)
He's more of a giver. He likes to be in control and be able to show you how much he loves you. It's slow and torturous but until you see stars with his tongue and mouth, he won't stop.
P - pace (how do he like to do it?)
As I said before, he is quiet, he likes vanilla sex. He thinks it's romantic and you will enjoy it much more if you take your time, enjoy yourselves and feel each other deep down.
Q - quickie (do he like quick sex?)
He doesn't prefer them but if it's an emergency or an imminent need, Hector will take it.
R - risk (would he take risks? which ones?)
He prefers not to take risks of any kind. He likes to be safe and to fuck you well, not half-heartedly for fear of being caught or being aware of something other than you.
S - stamina (how long does it last during sex?)
Two rounds is enough for the attention he usually gives you in each round. He will definitely not only fuck you with his cock, he will fuck you with his mouth, his fingers, his tongue and finally his cock.
T - toy (use toys)
You've never done it before. He might be attracted to the idea of seeing you using some kind of toy such as a vibrator or dildo or he might use handcuffs and the like.
U - unfair (how much does he like to provoke you?)
On a range of 1-10, he likes to provoke you 6-7. It depends a lot on the situation and how needy he is, but he usually likes to play with you until he makes you beg.
V - volume (how loud is it during sex?)
Not so loud, more like heavy breathing or stifling gasps but leaves all the screaming up to you.
W - wild card (small random story)
You woke up in the morning after a night of partying with Hector's family. You had come to visit his parents' house and yesterday you had dinner while catching up and drinking. This morning when you woke up you had a headache, so you quickly went into the bathroom trying not to wake Hector. You needed to relax.
Showering was your favorite time of the day, before going out or after coming home. So here you were, carefully washing your hair and feeling the water relax your body. A small noise made you notice someone entering the bathroom, with a smile on your face you waited for your companion and laughed as you felt a wet kiss on your shoulder. His big hands settle on your waist and help you turn around on him.
“Will you show up every time I'm showering?” you ask amused as his kisses spill over your neck, shoulder and collarbones.
“It's disrespectful for you to get in the shower without me” he murmurs honeyed as his kisses continue to lick you. His mouth bites your shoulder and makes you bristle, squealing.
“Hector, don't…” you warn but he keeps licking and biting your neck. You have clear intentions and you know it by the way he seeks to mark your skin.
Your hands embrace his shoulders and you hang off him as your wall slams against the cold shower wall. His fingers trail down your belly and stop at your mons pubis.
“It's your parents' house” you say scolding him.
But he doesn't care and his fingers slide into your wetness, caressing your lips. You moan slowly, trying to keep silent.
“I'll teach you to wait for me, baby” he growls into your neck as he bites into your skin and at the same time two of his fingers penetrate you hard making you gasp and cover your mouth.
X - x-ray (how big is it and how?)
It is long and slender, somewhat veiny and firm. When aroused it can look even bigger, sometimes it's scary, if you know what I mean.
Y - yearning (how long can desire last?)
He probably has a pretty high desire. You can't blame him, he's a young guy with hardly any experience and he wants to fuck you all the time.
Z - zzz (how is his sleep after sex?)
He can last a long time without falling asleep, in fact, you fall asleep before he does because Hector will watch you until the last second before he falls asleep.
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javierpena-inatacvest · 1 day ago
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Chapter 6- Undeniable
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Summary: when your car breaks down, you’re forced to ask Frankie for help. You’re not sure what you hate more- that you have to ask him for help, or that there’s a part of you that maybe can tolerate him
Word count: 6.2k
Pairing: Frankie Morales x f!reader (reader has a name/nickname, no use of y/n)
Warnings: Angst, tension (in a good way??!!), yearning (AHHH), teenage Frankie (and current day Frankie, for that matter) are down so bad, Santi and Benny play Dr. Phil
A/N: okay I said there would be smut this chapter, but I am a liar, and I am sorry 🤥 I flip flopped some scenes around and it ended up making more sense for some ✨things✨ to happen next chapter instead 🤷🏼‍♀️ I seriously love these two more and more every chapter, and this may have been my favorite one to write so far!! Thank you SO much for all the kind things you’ve had to say about this story- it really means more to me than you know 🥺💛 (sorry for any errors, I didn't have time to edit this chapter as well as I should have!)
All The Things We Never Said Masterlist
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Frankie, Age 18, Summer of 2007
“Jesus Christ, Morales, you got bricks for feet, or what?”
The Garcia’s newly installed basketball hoop had been a welcome addition to the neighborhood rotation of afterschool hangouts. Santi knows just as well as Frankie and Benny that it’s really nothing but a ploy to keep the boys occupied and out their parent’s hair, but the three have gladly accepted the olive branch Santi’s parents have extended to them, regardless of motive.
Now that the heat of late May has begun to sear off the pavement of Everett Street and the dwindling motivation of senior year is in full force, basketball has quickly taken over as the new after school activity.
Benny and Santi love it because it gives them a chance to get out the competitive angst they’ve had locked away since football season has come to a close.
Frankie loves it because it gives him something to keep him occupied until you come home from soccer practice.
Even then, he still finds himself anxiously counting down the minutes until your car pulls into the driveway, stepping out of the driver’s seat to give him that same goofy wave of approval that frees him from his friends’ constant bickering about where the three point line lays on the cement.
Ever since he told you he was leaving, there’s a part of him that debates forgoing basketball all together, just so he can make it to your house that much quicker when you get home. Now more than ever, he’s hyper aware of every second he has left with you, the internal countdown constantly nagging in the back of his mind before it’s four hundred miles that separate the two of you, not four houses.
Because now, not only does he have 74 days left to figure out how to say goodbye to his best friend, he has 74 days left to figure out how to tell her that he’s head over heels in love with her.
That’s what’s on Frankie’s mind as the pass Santi’s thrown at him rolls right past his shoes and down the driveway.
No shit, he’s got bricks for feet.
“Helloooooo? Earth to Frankie? You gonna get the fuckin’ ball, or what?” Santi shouts, wildly waving his arms, trying to snap his friend out of whatever weird daydream he’s stuck in.
“Oh, y-yeah. Yeah, sorry.” Frankie stammers, half jogging for the bouncing ball, tossing it back to Benny, also barely paying attention enough to keep the rubber from smacking him upside the head.
“Fuck, dude, you tryin’ to kill me, or somethin’? A heads up would be nice next time!” Benny scoffs, trying to downplay the fact he’s nearly just shit his pants from the ball that came out of nowhere and almost took him out.
“S-sorry. My bad.” Frankie grimaces, sheepishly running his hand through his thick, messy curls before rubbing the back of his neck.
Santi and Benny exchange confused glances with each other before turning their attention back to their clearly pre-occupied friend.
“Hey, you good, man?” Santi asks, scrunching his brow at Frankie’s tortured scowl.
“Yeah dude, you’ve been like, super out of it the past couple of days. Everything okay?” Benny adds. He tries to discreetly nudge Santi, givinging him a look that’s meant to ask if there’s something he’s missing. The best Santi can give him back is an ambivalent shrug, just as lost as his friend as to why Frankie’s mentally residing on another planet.
“Yeah. I’m- I’m fine.”
Sure, Santi and Benny aren’t as emotionally mature as their friend, but they also aren’t stupid. It’s obvious there’s something he’s keeping from them, and they’re far too relentless to let it go until they find out.
“Dude… C’mon.” Santi prods, taking a step towards Frankie to poke him on the shoulder.
“Yeah, spill the fuckin’ beans, Frank. What the hell’s goin’ on?” Benny chimes in, following Santi’s lead with another forceful poke.
“It’s nothing! Jesus, will you drop it?”
Santi smirks at how agitated Frankie’s become, spending enough years with his friend to know there’s one thing, and one thing only that’s got him this worked up.
“Is this about Kenz?”
Frankie’s eyes dart rapidly between his friends, the sky and his feet, too afraid to settle in one place as he’s consumed by his own silence, crossing his arms over his chest as he braces himself to defend against the onslaught he’s about to be faced with.
He could lie, say no, keep arguing with Santi and Benny until he’s blue in the face, but he knows it’s no use. Deep down, he has a feeling they already know what he’s going to say. He also has a feeling he’ll never go a day for the rest of his life where they won’t give him ten pounds of shit for it, but Frankie’s desperate. If he doesn’t figure out what to do, there’s a good chance he just may explode.
“You have to swear you won’t say anything about this to anyone.” Frankie sternly sighs, eyeing down his friends with a deathly glare, “Swear you won’t.”
“We swear, man.”
“Yeah, we swear.”
Benny and Santi nod in agreement, too shocked at his agreement to tell them anything rather than asking them to fuck off and leave him alone. They wait in patient silence as Frankie takes a long, shaky deep breath in.
“I um- fuck. Fuck.” He stammers, terrified to hear himself admit what he’s had locked away in his brain for years out loud for the first time, “I’m uh- I think I’m in love with MacKezie. I think I’m in love with her and I don’t know what to do.”
Frankie’s mortified by the silence from his friends in the seconds that follow. He’s even more mortified by their howling laughter that comes after that.
“That’s it? Oh, thank God!” Santi cackles, him and Benny clutching their chests to try and keep themselves standing, “Dude, I thought you were gonna say something fucking crazy. You looked like you were gonna fucking throw up.”
“W-what? Santi, did you not just hear what I fucking said? I literally just told you-”
“That you’re in love with MacKenzie? News flash, Morales, we’ve known you’ve been in love with her since like, the eighth grade. Holy shit, I can’t believe you finally fucking admitted it!”
Frankie’s face grows hotter by the second, his cheeks ablaze with bright reds and pinks, not sure if he’s more embarrassed by what he’s admitted, or the fact that he’s worked himself up for weeks to finally tell his friends something they’ve already known for years and Frankie was too blind to realize it.
“Well, okay- I just- what am I- what am I gonna do?” Frankie stutters, throwing his hands up to the sky, very aware that the admittance of his love for you is only a small part to his greater problem.
“Whatta you mean, what are you gonna do?” Benny questions, he and Santi still giggling over how frantic and flustered Frankie still was.
“It’s not fuckin’ rocket science, Frank.” Santi smirks, giving him a playful nudge, “Just tell her that you love her.”
“Are you out of your fucking mind, Santi?! I can’t just tell her I love her, that’s- fuck, that’s crazy!” Frankie’s all but shouting at his friend for what feels like the most outrageous idea he’s ever heard, crazily pacing up and down the driveway, as if he’s asking his friends for advice on where to hide the body he’s just killed.
“And that would be crazy because….?” Santi teases, anxiously awaiting whatever ridiculous answer Frankie has to finish off the rest of his sentence.
“Because?!” Frankie asks, storming so fast up and down the driveway, he’s about to make fresh cracks in the concrete, “Because, b-because- fuck, Santi, what if I tell her that I love her and she doesn’t feel the same way? What if I ruin our friendship forever and then I get my fuckin’ heart broken and lose my best friend? Jesus Christ, that’s why.”
“You wanna tell him or should I?” Benny proposes, shrugging at Santi.
In a silent agreement, Santi gives Benny a nod, taking a step towards Frankie to grab him by the shoulders, forcing him to stand still enough to capture his full attention.
“Frankie, lemme ask you this.” Santi pauses, bringing Frankie’s gaze from his feet up to his friend, thinking for once in his life, he may actually be willing to give him some serious advice.
“Yeah?”
“Are you blind, or are you stupid? ‘Cause I think you may be both.”
“What the fuck, dude?!” Frankie scoffs over Santi and Benny’s snickering, outstretching his arms to push Santi off of him.
“Damn, maybe he is.” Benny grimaces overdramatically, playing into Santi’s theatrics.
“Fuck off, Benny!” Frankie frowns, starting to regret asking his friends for help.
“Jesus Christ, I can’t believe I really have to spell this out for you.” Santi sighs, squeezing his temples between his thumb and index finger.
“What!?” Frankie presses, nearly fed up with his antics.
“Shit, you’re right Benny, he may be dumber than we thought.” Santi snorts before quickly turning his attention back to Frankie, “Frankie… You do realize MacKenzie’s in love with you too, right?”
Frankie feels his heart stop. He’s partly convinced it’s flatlined indefinitely. The only thing that’s keeping him alive is even the tiniest chance that what Santi has to say is actually true.
That maybe, just maybe, you love him, too.
“Santi, c’mon. Be- be fucking serious. There’s no way.”
Frankie won’t let himself believe anything yet, no matter how badly he wants to. Knowing Santi, he wouldn’t be shocked if he’s trying to pull him in to some sick sort of joke, but the looks on his, and Benny’s faces is all the earth shattering reassurance Frankie needs to know that Santi’s telling the truth.
“He’s being serious, I swear.” Benny chimes in, trying to aid in convincing Frankie.
“Think about it, Frank. The two of you spend every fucking second together. You’re basically already dating without actually dating. And not even just because of the fact you like, pretty much go on dates to the movies or ice cream, or whatever. Didn’t you say she cried for like, an hour when you told her you were leaving?”
“I- I mean, y- yeah, I guess.”
“Or the fact that she’s never dated anyone else and has had you locked in as her prom date since last year.” Benny adds.
“Don't even get me started on the fact you two cuddle every time we watch a movie together, because God forbid you’re not touching each other for an hour and a half.”
“I- I- I- don’t know. I mean, sure, yeah, but just because she does that doesn’t mean she’s in love with me!”
Frankie can feel his insides churn, like someone’s put them in a blender and cranked it on high. He’s not sure what’s more terrifying- that you do all those things but you’re not in love with him, or that you do all of them because you are.
He quickly comes to determine the second is much scarier than the first. Mostly because there’s a part of him that believes maybe you’re just as in love with him as he is with you.
“Fuck, I think I’m gonna throw up.”
Frankie’s knees wobble as he sinks to the ground, bottom hitting the pavement with a thud.
“Well shit, don’t do it on the driveway, my mom’s gonna kill me. If you gotta yak, at least do it on the grass.”
Santi and Benny settle in on either side of Frankie, the trio of boys squatting at the edge of the driveway. Frankie buries his head in his hands, scrunching his face so hard into his sweaty palms that maybe, some sort of reasonable idea will pop into his brain if he squeezes hard enough.
“You guys really think she likes me? Like, actually?” Frankie asks, peeking his head up to look back and forth between Santi and Benny.
“Uh, yeah.” The pair agree in unison, each giving their friend a pat on the back, trying to keep their all-knowing laughter at bay to soothe Frankie through his distress.
“Fuck. Holy shit. So- So what do I do? Just- Do I just tell her?”
“I mean, I’m no love guru, but you like, may wanna be a little more subtle than that.” Benny snickers, giving Frankie a little nudge, “I mean, do you wanna tell her?”
“Yeah. Fuck. Fuck, I wanna tell her so bad.” It spills out of Frankie’s mouth without any hesitation. The more he thinks about it, the more sure he is.
“Like, you’re already going with her to prom and stuff. You could do it then?” Santi suggests with a slight shrug of his shoulders.
“Damn, alright, Mr. Romance over here with the advice.”
“Shut up, Benny. You got any better advice? At least I’ve fuckin’ had a girlfriend before, you dingus, have you? Didn’t think so.”
Frankie’s completely blocked out their bickering, lost in his own train of thought, where all he can picture is you- Your smile, the little strand of hair that you tuck behind your ear when it falls in your face, the way your nose crinkles when you laugh, the little curl in your lips you get when you smirk at him when he tells a stupid joke.
How badly he wishes his lips could meet yours to feel that smirk pressed against his face.
“Do… Do you- Do you think I should kiss her?”
“Jesus Christ, Frankie, what are we, twelve?” Yeah, man, fuckin’ kiss her.” Santi snorts, Benny joining in with muffled laughter in his throat at the innocence of his question, “God, with how nervous you sounded, I thought you were gonna ask if you should like, have sex with her, or somethin’.”
It’s then his brain truly short circuits, his heart about to fall out of his ass and lump in his throat the size of a softball.
He has enough balls to admit he’s thought plenty of times about kissing you.
But right now, he certainly doesn’t have enough balls to confess to his friends, (or even to himself, for that matter) he’s spent just as much time thinking about doing a lot more than just kissing you.
He’s spent even more time thinking about just how badly he wants to.
One step at a time, Morales.
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You, Present
“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me…”
Turning over your ignition to the sound of empty rattles once wasn’t anything to worry about.
Turning it over twice to the sound of silence you could chalk up to bad luck.
But after six different attempts to start your car to no avail, you were fairly certain your issue wasn’t based solely on user error.
“Fuck…” You huff to yourself, yanking out your keys and slamming the driver’s side door behind you as you storm back into the house, now in a race against the clock to get your car not only started, but driveable enough to get you to work on time.
It’s the stupid things like this you haven’t mentally prepared yourself for when it comes to your father’s impending death- Not having a built in mechanic at your disposal to help solve your car issues when something goes awry. It seems selfish to take from the few precious moments you have left with him to pester your dad about your car troubles, but you know for a fact, your dying father has a better chance of diagnosing your issue from his bed than you do hands deep in the engine.
“Hey, Dad.” You grimace, gently rousing him from his half-awake state in front of the TV, “Dad, can I ask you something, or are you too busy dying?”
Your joke is enough to crack a sleepy smile in the corner of his lips, grunting as he turns his head over to see you hunched over the edge of his bed.
“Depends. Is it worth my time, or should I go back to decaying?” He fights with everything in him to let out the softest laugh, a sputtering cough following as his chest rises and falls, trying his best to not let his final days prevent him from being the helpful dad you’d always known.
“My car won’t start. Do you have any idea of what it could be?”
“You gonna wheel me out to the driveway to have me figure it out?”
You both know it’s ridiculous, what you’re asking him to do. You’re not sure what compelled you to think that he’d be able to help solve your problem, but your yearning for the normalcy that’s been absent in your life for so long seems to outweigh any logic.
“I think we could probably crank the bed high enough for you to look under the hood.” You shrug with a sad type of sarcasm, anxiously fiddling with your fingers to try and brainstorm a solution to your time-sensitive issue.
“You know there’s someone four houses down who is very capable of solving your problem who isn’t dying.”
For as hard as your dad fought for his half huffed laugher, he fights even harder for the smug smirk pinching the corner of his cheeks.
“Dad…” You let out a deep breath, trying to not let your eyes roll to the back of your skull from even pondering the idea of admitting to Frankie Morales that you need his help.
“Mackenzie Grace?” He questions back, pretending to be blissfully unaware of your reason for dramatic pause.
“Dad, you can’t be serious.”
“I am, actually. Dead serious. And right now, I’m at a point in my life where that statement can’t be any closer to the truth.”
Unfortunately, that’s an argument you can’t fight.
You sigh again, chewing at your lip to see if your brain can muster any other plausible solution before you admit defeat, but you know it’s no use. Your dad is kind enough to accept your silence as a white flag, sparing you the embarrassment of admitting he’s right. What he’s not kind enough to do, is to let you off without making sure he gets the last word.
“You can’t stay mad at him forever, honey.”
“I can, actually.”
Right now, your dad better thank his lucky stars he’s dying, because any other circumstance, and you would have already been halfway out the door before you put yourself through this conversation again.
“MacKenzie,” He pauses, the frail and wrinkled ends of his fingertips reaching out just enough to rest on the hand you have wrapped around the bar of his bed guard rails, “if I give you some dying words of wisdom, do you promise to listen, actually listen to what I have to say?”
You know he’s about to tell you something you have no intention of wanting to hear. You want so badly to lie, to say “yes”, just to appease him without really meaning it. But the guilty conscious eating you alive in the pit of your stomach won’t let you get off that easily.
“Yeah, I promise.”
It’s soft enough for only you and him, just quiet enough to keep the world out of your shared secret.
“Holding a grudge won’t make you any happier. It won’t change what happened, either. I’d be willing to bet he’s still holding one against you, too. There’s two sides to every story, MacKenzie Grace, and you can’t keep blaming him like you didn’t have a part in what happened, too. He’s already accepted he’s in the wrong for what he did. God bless the fact you ended up just as stubborn as your old man, but at some point, you have to get off your high horse and do the same.”
It’s unsettling, the feeling that washes over you- it makes every inch of your body twinge and wince in a strange sort of self-inflicted pain you can’t shake, the indescribable discomfort that makes you want to crawl out of your skin and evaporate into thin air. The tormented sensation stirring in your gut makes you want to scream and cry and run away, all at the same time.
Because it’s not the truth of your dad’s words alone that make you feel this way- you’ve come face to face with this truth more times than you’d like to count.
It’s the fact that for the first time, you’ve come face to face with the truth, and there’s a part of you that can accept it.
You stand there for another moment at the edge of his bed, eyes peeled to the ground, trying to find the words you’re too scared to admit. Maybe your silence is a loud enough confession.
“I’ll see you when I get back from work, okay?” You lean down and kiss his head, giving your dad’s hand a final, gentle squeeze before you’re halfway out the door, car keys in hand.
“I thought your car wasn’t working?”
Your dad has never been one for “I told you so’s” . The stifled smile and playful glisten in his tired eyes will do just fine.
“Bye, Dad.”
Your dad’s words echo in your brain as you begin your journey down the driveway, terrified by the tiniest amount of weight it’s lifted off your shoulders.
“Holding a grudge won’t make you any happier. It won’t change what happened, either.”
Maybe he’s got a point. But that’s easy to say when you’re only dealing with the idea of Frankie you’ve built up in your head, not when you’re about to come face to face with him in real time.
There’s a part of you that debates just walking to work. Hell, the hour walk it would take you to get to work would probably be easier than the thirty second walk you’re about to take four houses down.
You’ll be lucky if you don’t gnaw off your entire thumbnail by the time you make it to the Morales’s doorstep, trying to clench your fists as tight as possible with every step you take towards their house to attempt to keep your nerves (and nails) intact.
You’re not sure you’ve ever walked this slow to his house. There was once a time that you couldn’t sprint there fast enough, legs leaping over cracks in the sidewalk to meet Frankie at his front door. Now, it feels like you might as well be crawling with the time you’re trying to waste before you ring his doorbell.
You practically tip toe up the steps to the porch, like it’s some sort of crime to be at his house and you’re terrified of being caught. Your finger hovers over the doorbell, outstretched and ready to press, too frozen in fear to move the extra inch it will take to press the rounded button.
“Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” You curse under your breath, furrowing your brow at your inability to face his front door. You ball your free hand up to a fist, slamming your knuckles against your forehead with a sigh so heavy, you’d probably give that wolf from The Three Little Pigs a run for his money, “‘C’mon, MacKenzie, just ring the damn doorbell.”
Your heart stops as the tip of your index finger finally pushes hard enough to force the high pitched chime, forcing yourself to keep your feet planted on the doormat below you instead of booking it half way across town.
“One sec!”
The bellow of his voice from behind the door is enough to jumpstart the stand still of your heartbeat, so much so that in an instant, it’s gone from flatlining to nearly beating out of your chest.
At this point, even if you wanted to run, you’re not sure your body would let you.
As the knob turns and draws back towards the house, Frankie’s broad body fills the doorframe. He looks almost as frozen as you, so stunned by your presence, his tongue darts between his lips as a placeholder for the words he lacks.
“H-hey?” He asks it so cautiously, eyebrows scrunching in confusion while he looks you up and down, too scared to say anything else until he figures out why you’ve shown up at his front door.
“My um- My car won’t- I have to go to work and I can’t get my car to start.”
You don’t dare phrase it as anything other than a statement of fact. You’ll die before the words “Frankie, will you help me?” escape from your lips.
“O-oh. Shit.” He cocks his head, the pinch of his face immediately easing along with the rest of his body, standing up a little straighter as he leans against the doorframe.
“Sorry, i-if you’re busy or whatever, don’t feel like you-”
“No- No, I mean, yeah, no, I don’t- shit-” He stutters, pausing as he shakes his head with a little laugh at the ground, trying to compose himself before he trips over his words again, “Yes, I um- Yeah, I can help.”
“O-okay. Thank- Thanks.” You try to fight the tug you feel in your lips creeping towards the corner of your cheeks that mirrors the grin Frankie’s trying so desperately to hide on his face.
The two of you stand there for a moment, feet wriggling in the tips of your shoes and fingers twiddling in your pockets, using every ounce of strength you have to ignore the heat flushing through your cheeks that makes you want to hate him just a little bit less.
It’s hard to suppress when Frankie’s trying to keep up his facade with the world’s worst poker face as he’s beaming ear to ear.
“Let me just uh- Lemme grab some stuff and I’ll meet you over there?” He asks, tiptoeing around what seems too good to be true.
“Y-yeah. Yeah, sounds good.”
You give each other a little nod before he disappears behind his door. You tilt your head to the sky, eyes closed as the deepest sigh of relief you can take escapes your body. It feels like the first gasp you take when you peak above the surface after holding your breath underwater, remembering what it feels like to finally breathe again.
It takes everything in you to pretend you don’t feel the strange pang in your chest as you watch Frankie walk to your house after you’ve made it back to your driveway, his gray shirt clinging to his biceps as he carries over his bucket of tools and brown curls spilling out from under the worn, Standard Oil hat he’s obviously still refused to throw away.
You lean against the hood of your car, arms crossed over your chest, trying your best to seem ambivalent about the whole ordeal.
If you were nominated for an Oscar in the “Pretending to be aloof in front of Frankie Morales while he fixes your car” category, you most surely wouldn’t be winning.
“Hey, again.” He grins as he sets his tools down, mirroring your stance to cross his arms over his chest.
“Hey, again.” You parrot.
“So, uh… Your car?” Frankie asks, nodding over to the vehicle you’re leaning on.
“Yeah, uh- yeah, I don’t know what’s going on. I tried starting it like, five different times and it doesn’t do anything. I’ve never had this happen to me before and of course it’s when I’m trying to leave for work.” You shrug, trying to play into the fact you at least tried to do something before coming to find him.
“Huh. Alright, well, lemme see what I can do, okay?” He nods again, leaving your fingers to play with your sleeves to keep yourself occupied, instead of staring at him, mesmerized by the way you can still hear the gears turning in his brain as he processes. “Can I uh- is it okay if I have the keys?”
You fumble through your pockets, digging out your keys to place them in the palm of Frankie’s outstretched hand, the linger of your touch on his skin just long enough to make you subtly jerk your arm back in embarrassment.
You step back to let Frankie slide past you, watching him try to squeeze himself into the driver’s seat to start your car, half his body still hanging out the open door.
“Are you- are you not teaching anymore?”
“Wh- huh?” His question catches you off guard, the scowl of confusion painted across your face making him quickly elaborate before drawing his attention back to your car.
“You just uh- sorry, you said you were going to work. It’s 5 P.M. on a Thursday in June, so, ya know, figured you probably weren’t going to school.”
He gives the key one more turn before sliding out of the car, carefully passing your keys back off to you before making his way to open the hood. You cautiously follow behind him, arms still crossed against your chest as he props the front of the car up to reveal the engine.
“Oh. Uh- no, yeah. No, I’m uh- I’m still teaching. Normally I do summer school to make some extra money, but because of my dad and everything and not being home, it just, ya know, I just couldn’t. I still wanted something to do to make money and keep me busy, so um, Katie’s Dad still owns The Parrot’s Nest on 14th, so I asked him if I could just do some part time waitressing and bartending and stuff. It’s nice ‘cause he’s been really flexible with everything going on.”
Your eyes dart to the ground as Frankie shifts his view from the inside of the car back to you. The air fills with a heavy pause, like neither of you are really sure how to react to the fact you’re managing a semi-civil conversation that’s more than just one word responses.
Frankie lets out a quiet huff, trying to hide the soft smile curling in the corner of his scruff covered cheeks before turning back to the car, silently tinkering for a few moments before mustering up the courage to speak again.
“That’s nice of him. Didn’t even know that place was still around.” There’s a little grunt as he leans deeper into the car, reaching around to search for some sort of part he wants to check, “I’m uh- I’m glad you’re still teaching, though. That’s um, that’s good.”
“Yeah, thanks.”
Your hands have shifted from folded across your chest to in your pockets, a subconscious move you’ve made as a brick from the wall you’ve built between yourself and Frankie Morales seems to crumble without you realizing.
You let him work for a few more moments before he’s diagnosed your issue, carefully closing the hood and wiping the engine grime on the towel from the tool bucket he’s brought with him.
“So uh- good news is, you just need a new battery. Easy fix. Bad news is, your battery’s dead, and your car’s not gonna start without a new one.” Frankie shrugs, hoping he’s not pushing his luck with the little laugh he gives himself at his joke.
“Fuck. Okay, uh- shit, okay.” You mutter, not necessarily upset with Frankie for delivering the news of his discovery, but angry at the fact you need to buy a new car battery and have no way to get to work. “Um, sorry, give me a second, I’m gonna call Jim and let him know that I can’t make it in today.”
“I- I can drive you.”
You’re sure Frankie’s just as surprised as you when the offer comes out of his mouth, freezing your thumb over your boss’s contact you’re about to dial. Frankie clearly interprets the look on your face as one of skepticism about his idea, quickly trying to backpedal before he preemptively digs his own grave.
“No, I mean, um- if you want. I can- I can drop you off. So you, uh- that way you don’t have to miss work.”
“No, Frankie, it’s fine, you- you already helped figure out what’s wrong with my car, it’s not a big deal, don’t wo-”
“I want to.”
You don’t mean for your sigh to be as audible as it is. It only seems fair, considering there was no world in which you ever considered having to contemplate not only asking Frankie for help, but also spending a fifteen minute car ride together so he can drop you off at work. You chew at your bottom lip as you contemplate the lesser of two evils- be stuck in Frankie’s metal death trap of a car, forced within a 3 foot proximity of him for the entire ride, or miss out on the most hours you’ve been scheduled in the past two weeks for money you really do need.
Swallowing your pride is the toughest pill you’ve had to swallow in quite a long time.
“Fine.”
It’s not even your answer you think shocks him the most. It’s how little he had to argue with you to agree.
You want to roll your eyes at the little smirk of satisfaction he gives himself, knowing you’ve gone 0-2 on your hardened stance of despising Frankie’s guts since talking with your dad. It only stings more that you’re sure Frankie is getting endless amounts of satisfaction that you’ve given into him so quickly.
But fuck, if you didn’t miss that stupid, goofy grin of his when he knows he’s beaten you at your own game.
“Only if your car isn’t gonna kill us first before we get there.” You groan, eyeing down Frankie’s beater truck he’s been driving since he got his license. It was in questionable shape over a decade ago, you’re not sure what kind of deal Frankie made with the devil to keep the hunk of junk up and running.
“She’s fine. Haven’t managed to kill you in her yet, have I?” Frankie rebuttals, grabbing his tools as you follow behind him towards his car.
“Well, there’s a first time for everything.” You sigh, shaking your head in annoyance that Frankie’s still driving this damn thing on principle alone, “How the fuck is this thing even still running?”
“‘Cause you don’t give her enough credit. Got me here from North Carolina just fine.” Frankie scoffs, the two of you settling into your perspective seats inside his truck.
His comment makes you frown at your lap as you buckle your seatbelt, not because of the sass he’s inflicted, but because it reminds you that he’s moved himself states away just to further the distance between you two.
“S-sorry, it was meant to be a joke.” Frankie mutters, looking over at you as he drives and noticing the way you’ve gone quiet, eyes peeled to the ground.
“No, I know.” You reply back, anxiously digging under your nails with your stare still locked on your feet. “How’s um- how’s North Carolina?”
“Oh. Um, It’s uh- It’s fine, I guess.”
It’s then you notice Frankie’s realized the reason for your silence, uncomfortably fidgeting in his seat and grip tightening around the steering wheel as he processes your disappointment.
It’s hard to decipher what he means by “fine.” Fine, like he’s more than fine and doesn't want to rub it in your face how well he’s doing? Fine, like actually a normal amount of fine and he just has nothing of interest to report? Fine, like he’s not fine at all, but doesn’t have the balls to admit it to you?
With the way he can’t bring himself to look at you, it has to be the first or third option. You’re not sure which one is worse.
You’re also not sure why you feel so compelled to find out.
“You still uh- doing um, mechanic stuff for the Army?” You ask, glancing over just enough to watch Frankie’s fingers drum against the steering wheel.
“Yeah. Helicopter maintenance, mostly.”
It’s still not enough to give you the definitive answer you’re looking for. You’re too stubborn for your own good to just quit while you’re ahead. Because of all the questions you could have asked him, the one you ask him next is like voluntarily putting a gun to your head and asking him to shoot.
“Are you, uh- you um, seeing anyone? Samantha, or whatever her name was?”
It’s the first time he locks eyes with you since you’ve gotten in the car. Frankie looks you up and down, tongue running across the top of his teeth under his lips and raising his brows just enough to let you know you’ve got his attention.
Every second of silence that lingers before his answer only leads you to believe he’s trying to let you down slowly before he has to pull the trigger. You brace yourself for the bullet.
“No. I uh, shit- I- Sarah and I broke up a while ago. After um, after Santi’s wedding, actually. No, I um, I’m not seeing anyone. Haven’t really been since then, I guess.”
Your body stays tense, still bracing yourself for the inevitable blow, but it never comes. Not only has Frankie taken his finger off the trigger, he’s put away the gun all together. You’re so stunned you’ve made it out of the question alive, you aren’t quite sure how to react.
“O-oh. I uh- I didn’t know.”
“Are- are you? S-seeing anyone?” He stutters, the words heavy in his throat as he gulps.
“No. After how things ended with Liam, I just- I haven’t either.”
It’s uncomfortable, the silence that fills the car and seeps between you. Not quite awkward, not quite upset, not quite relieved, either. It’s heavy, like a backpack full of bricks you’ve had strapped to your shoulders that you refuse to put down- you’d rather keep burdening yourself with the weight than just take it off, too used to the ache it spreads to every inch of your body.
Maybe, the silence is so uncomfortable because you’re starting to realize how stupid it is to let these types of things keep weighing you down.
Holding a grudge won’t make you any happier. It won’t change what happened, either.
You’ve been so lost in your own head, you’d barely even realized the car had come to a stop, the soft orange and pink glow of The Parrot’s Nest sign illuminating the inside of Frankie’s truck with muted neon snapping you back to reality.
Your hand wraps around the door handle, ready to break free into the parking lot before Frankie’s voice stops you.
“What time are you done?”
You look back over your shoulder, taken aback.
“Why?”
“So I can pick you up.”
It’s so matter of fact, like he had never contemplated any other option from the moment he’d offer to drive you, his soft, brown eyes sinking as you shake your head at him.
“Frankie, it’s fine. I can have someone else drive me ho-”
“Please?”
Your head wants to say no. It wants to push open the door with a half hearted “thanks for the ride” and pretend like the past 15 minutes had simply never existed, wiping the strange pang in your chest and swirling in your stomach from its memory.
Apparently, your heart’s decided it has other plans.
“I’m done at ten.”
“Then I promise to be back here at ten.”
Frankie Morales is a man who’s broken many things.
Your heart, your trust, your friendship.
But out of all the things Frankie has broken, he’s never broken a promise.
And that’s how you know at ten o’clock sharp, you’ll find his beat up Chevy in the parking lot of The Parrot’s Nest, waiting for you.
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