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#but apparently they support some... questionable and frankly wrong things too though
catsnuggler · 4 months
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I should curate who I follow and which blogs are allowed on my dash at some point. There's at least one I think I should blacklist.
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niobefurens · 1 year
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Censory Deprivation.
Why stop at fatness? If you are going to put a red pen through Roald Dahl—as his publisher, Puffin, did recently—there are so many better bits to choose. The sensitivity readers contented themselves with excising such words as “fat”, “flabby”, “ugly” and “Kipling”. But Dahl doesn’t merely offer sexism, racism and colonialism; in his adult fiction you can find sins so frankly filthsome and swigpilling there has yet to be an -ism coined to cover them. There is violence, voyeurism and an unforgettably frightsome story in which a scorpion collector accidentally has sex with a leper. Not for nothing did his family call him “Roald the Rotten” and—more bluntly—“Roald the Bastard”. Listen to this story.
Something seems to be changing in British publishing. You can see it in the sheepish announcement from Puffin after news of its edits prompted a backlash, that Roald the Revolting will still roll off the presses unaltered, alongside the works of Roald the Redacted. You can see it, too, in almost-silenced books that are now thriving. “Time to Think”, a book by Hannah Barnes about the Tavistock’s gender-identity clinic in London, which referred children as young as nine for puberty blockers, was rejected by 22 publishers. Swift Press, a nimble newcomer, took it on and it made the bestseller lists. People in the industry suggest that the red pen is being wielded less freely. As one publishing executive puts it, there is a sense that things “had gone too far”. (Though since this person did not want to be quoted by name, not far enough.)
A change is overdue. The editing of Dahl by Puffin, an imprint of Penguin, was a symptom of something frogglehumping in the publishing world, but far from the only one. Authors have been dropped; books have been buried; people have lost jobs; sensitivity readers have been employed to ensure modern morals are adhered to. James Bond has even been edited to make him less vile—the literary equivalent of trying to make water less wet. 
There is a line of argument that says that this isn’t really a problem. Suppression of speech, this argument runs, is the preserve of totalitarian, Orwellian-style states and institutions that use force to stop people speaking out. In a country like Britain, speech is still free. This is pure gobblefunk and Orwell’s “1984” is the wrong Orwellian work to understand why. 
Better by far to turn to an introduction Orwell wrote for “Animal Farm”. Orwell had finished his satire on the Soviet Union—which many consider his masterpiece—in 1943, whereupon it was promptly rejected by four publishers. As with Ms Barnes’s 22 rejections, some offered reasons. One publisher pleasingly suggested Orwell might want to rethink the pigs. Having swine as the ruling class might “give offence…particularly to anyone who is a bit touchy, as undoubtedly the Russians are”. Orwell kept the pigs; “Animal Farm” sold half a million copies in two years. 
He later reflected on all this in that introduction. There is, he wrote, a “veiled censorship” in British publishing. “At any given moment there is an orthodoxy, a body of ideas which it is assumed that all right-thinking people will accept without question.” It is “not exactly forbidden to say this, that or the other, but it is ‘not done’ to say it”. Anyone who tries to do so “finds himself silenced with surprising effectiveness”. They still do. A book on colonialism by Nigel Biggar, an emeritus professor of theology at Oxford University, was welcomed by its publisher, Bloomsbury, as a work of “major importance” and then postponed, apparently indefinitely, because “public feeling…does not currently support the publication of the book”. It is now out under a different publisher.
What is striking is how apparently mild the sanctions are for speaking out. People think, as one author puts it, that you are afraid of Twitter death threats. You aren’t: what really terrifies you is that your colleagues will think a little less of you. Most people do not require the threat of being burned at the stake to shut them up; being flamed by their peers on Twitter is more than enough. 
This is true of more typically Orwellian states, too. When Anne Applebaum studied the Sovietisation of central Europe, the historian found political conformity was “the result not of violence or direct state coercion, but rather of intense peer pressure”. Publishing, an industry in which every third person is called Sophie, seems particularly susceptible to such pressure. 
All this involves no laws, no police, nor even any obvious threats. Polite people write polite emails and books are politely buried. “The sinister fact about literary censorship in England”, Orwell wrote, “is that it is largely voluntary.” To go against that ominously amorphous “public feeling” is deeply uncomfortable. Ms Barnes found writing her book about the Tavistock’s clinic hard not because she thought it was wrong but because “I thought: ‘People are not going to like me.’” Publishers are equally nervy. In the name of looking likeable they panic and pre-empt offence: they cull the pigs; drop the book on colonialism; cut the foulsome bits.
The problem with all this nervousness—this desire-to-look-nice-ness—is that it has very nasty results. In “Fahrenheit 451”, a novel by Ray Bradbury, a society has taken to burning all books lest any cause offence. As one character explains: “Don’t step on the toes of the…second-generation Chinese, Swedes, Italians, Germans, Texans, Brooklynites, Irishmen….” This book-burning wasn’t mandated by the government. “There was no dictum, no declaration, no censorship to start with, no! Technology…and minority pressure carried the trick.” Now the books have all gone. Now “thanks to them, you can stay happy all the time.”
Penguin, incidentally, offers an audiobook of “Fahrenheit 451”. Perhaps its executives might be encouraged to listen to it before they get their red pens out. Then again, they might be tempted to edit it as well; after all, Puffin took the words “Japanese” and “Norway people” and “Yankee-Doodles” out of Dahl. Best be sure we can all stay happy all the time. ■
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jasontoddiefor · 3 years
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Tyki Mikk is a Clone and I can (almost) prove it
Tyki Mikk is undoubtedly a fan favorite and yet we don’t really know a lot about him. For a character that was created with the purpose of being handsome (cf. D.Gray-Man Manga Volume 5, page 150), he carries a lot of baggage and has a rather unclear past. A theory that has haunted me since I read chapter 198 and has only grown in strength with the most recent arc is that Tyki is in fact a clone of Nea. As far fetched as this seems at start, there is quite a bit of evidence supporting this theory.
1) Tyki’s visible similarity to Nea (and Mana)
One of the first things Wisely remarks on when he meets Tyki is his similarity to “a certain man” (Chapter 187).
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This similarity is picked up twice more in the manga. When Allen meets Nea for the first time (cf. chapter 198), he mistakes him for Tyki at first.
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And it is brought up a third time by Nea himself in chapter 225 when he says:
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To which Tyki, or rather Joyd, has this wonderful reaction:
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But more on that guy specifically later. Point being right here is that three different characters, or four if you want to count Road and Wisely separately, acknowledge that Tyki resembles Nea a lot, down to the man himself. How does that saying go again? Once An Accident, Twice A Coincidence, Three Times A Pattern? This is something that repeatedly gets brought up again. And this is without going into detail on how much Tyki resembles not only Nea, but said man’s identical twin as well. Just look at that dashing long hair!
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And take this from chapter 158 as well
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Pretty long haired boy Mana is nothing new as of chapter 218 and 219:
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Another interesting point here is that Tyki is the exact same height as the Earl in human form! They’re both 188cm tall. Nea, on the other hand, is listed at being 177cm. This could just be that Nea unfortunately ended up as the shorter twin, or, we take into consideration what Mana tells Allen/Red in chapter 238:
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He remembers being seventeen, which means that he and Nea probably weren’t done growing yet when the “Earl” corrupted Mana. (It also kind of makes everything about Nea more hilarious if you realize he’s just seventeen.) Tyki, however, is 26 when we first meet him and should be around 27 now. He is an actual adult and not bound to hit another growth spurt.
But to summarize the first argument: Tyki looks uncannily similar to Nea and Mana and the manga keeps pointing it out so we can assume this resemblance is important.
2) Cloning is possible in canon
Now the second point is just here to point out that we know cloning to be possible. Funnily, Tyki’s resemblance to Nea gets pointed out just before the Alma Arc, which very much deals with the concept of reincarnation – only there we have the brains of deceased Exorcists transplanted into youthful bodies.
However, it’s not as if something like DNA hasn’t been mentioned before. Specifically, it has been called “Helix of life” by no other than maybe-former-Bookman but definitely First-Nea-host Past!Allen in chapter 221:
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So let’s assume that, in the aftermath of Nea’s “death”, PastA didn’t just wait around for Nea to wake again, but tried to find a vessel for him. Messing around with this helix, and whatever other dubious science and magic this world had to offer, and created a new body to host Nea. Except he failed, and the result is Tyki.
But if that is so, shouldn’t Tyki remember anything about that? Good question. Time for some more shady weird stuff about Tyki.
3) The Missing Years
In chapter 202, while the Earl is resting, Tyki talks to Road. I don’t speak Japanese, so I can’t verify which translation is more accurate, but I’ve found these two:
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Now the official German one also goes with a similar translation as the second one here, implying that Tyki has been with the Earl for ten years. In any case, the fact that this decade at all gets mentioned is quite odd because it doesn’t match up with what we know of Mana travelling with Allen. Cross calls Allen a “ten-year-old brat” (chapter 208) when he looks after him. So between Mana travelling with Allen and current canon, only 6 years have passed – what are up with the other 4 that are supposedly within this decade? We don’t have a definite age for how old Allen was when he met Mana, but I’d say around 7 or older. That’s still not enough to fill out the decade they speak about here.
Now, presuming that it does in fact refer to Tyki staying with the Earl for that time, we’re either left with assuming that the Earl acted as a separate entity as we see in 218, or that Tyki’s memories are just flat out wrong.
4) Tyki Mikk’s Canon-Typical Ignorance AKA The Baby of The Family
The more often Tyki appears, the more we see how much he actually doesn’t know about the going-ons of the war, or even himself. This goes back as far as the Ark Arc in chapter 130 with the Earl pointing out that:
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So this form is apparently something that all Noah of Pleasure can take on, a sort of second stage of awakening. Still, it feels significant that Tyki separates his life so much into “black” and “white”, “Noah” and “human”, going as far as suppressing a part of his Noah. It puts him in direct opposition to Skinn, who was more or less entirely consumed by his Noah memories. Though, perhaps this is also just a narrative ploy because a character with the ability to chose is, frankly speaking, fuck off overpowered and the only reason why Tyki isn’t constantly leveling battlefields is probably that he just doesn’t know how to apply himself.
Regardless, Tyki’s ignorance also becomes visible in chapter 187 again when he wonders about his Noah name:
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Nobody else reacts like he does, even though the other Noah haven’t been awake as long as he has and also should have retained the same memory damage as Joyd after Nea’s murder spree. Yet Tyki feels a little like the baby of the family, still learning and growing while everyone else is already in the know, which can’t be too far from the truth if we look at chapter 225:
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Wisely and Road definitely know that something went down and kept it from Tyki for so long for reasons. So besides Allen learning the truth sometime in the future, Tyki is also heading towards some kind of realization – and honestly, what better than the fact that the man who enjoys his freedom and roam so much, was artificially created?
Road could have manipulated his subconsciousness, his memories. It’s a miracle really that the Earl hadn’t had a breakdown around Tyki already given how much he looks like Nea. And if Tyki really awoke as a Noa a decade ago, then eh would have been right the age Nea was when he died. The Earl should have reacted in one way or another.
Other small details that don’t add up is a) the claim that Tyki and Sheril are actual brothers. They have different last names, which would imply that they are perhaps rather half siblings, sharing one parent, or maybe they just aren’t related at all in the first place. The other thing is that Nea recognizing Tyki’s face immediately after confronting Mana about his changed appearance just adds even more suspicion.
5) TLDR
Tyki is either a clone or something else messy went down because there’s no way that there’s a natural Nea and Mana copy running around who also just so happens to be a Noah. No way.
Thanks for coming to my  TED talk I’m never writing meta again this was a nightmare to post.
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jayeray-hq · 3 years
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Twin Kittens (Part 1)
Hey everyone! This is my part for the Paws and Claws Collab that was with @katslutski The theme of the collab was hybrids (puppy/kitty/bunny etc) so if you’re interested check it out!
Unfortunately as usual I got excessively wordy, so this is going to be split into three parts. This part alone is about 20K words and we're only about a third of the way through! so it definitely had to be split up.
If you like this feel free to check out my Atsumu or my Osamu masterlists!
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While there is no smut in this part there will be in the future thus this story is 18+ minors DNI please!
TW: Previous mentions of past abuse, gaslighting, verbal, death threats, hybrids have been treated like slaves before
This story is Fem Reader x Atsumu x Osamu but there will be no actual incest. While there will be a threesome at the end the boys won't ever touch one another sexually.
“Are you alright?” your neighbor Ojirou asked, a concerned look on his face as he watched you listlessly stir your drink with the straw, playing with the melting ice in the glass.
The two of you were actually good friends, having lived peacefully side by side for over five years now. You’d met on the very first day when you moved in, you’d been struggling to open the door with a large box in your arms and he’d rushed to the rescue. He and his hybrids diligent Kita, the blue merle border collie, and sly, sleek Suna the Siamese cat, had all pitched in to help you get moved in and settled. You’d been good friends with all three of them ever since.
It was his turn to host your traditional Friday night dinner, so you’d gone over to his apartment determined to enjoy yourself. However, something must’ve given away the rough day you’d had, because all three of them had been casting you concerned looks all night and trading glances when they thought you couldn’t see.
It was apparently Aran’s job to confront you about it, though both hybrids were looking at you expectantly. Well, Kita was looking at you expectantly, Suna was pretending not to pay attention, his phone in his hands, but you could see him watching out of the corner of his eye.
“What makes you think something’s wrong?” you asked determined to at least give it a try.
The stern look you got from Kita and the sympathetic smile from Ojiro told you how ultimately fruitless the effort had been, so you caved in with a sigh, pushing your glass away so you could slump face down on the table burying your head in your arms. You’d tell them, but that didn’t mean you wanted to be necessarily looking them in the eye when you did.
“You know how I went to that thing with some of my girl friends today?” you asked tiredly.
There were acknowledging hums all around even from Suna who you saw from the corner of your eye was no longer pretending to look at his phone and instead watching you like some rare breed of animal in a zoo doing something particularly fascinating.
“Well it was fun, great even,” you told them with a small quirk of your lips, “Right up until we started talking about significant others. Apparently two of them are getting married soon, one has a baby on the way, and the rest are in steady loving relationships or have openly declared they aren’t interested in that kind of thing. So guess who was the only sad single there?”
“Ah,” Ojirou acknowledged a well of sympathy in his voice.
“And of course once they found out, they were like ‘oh I think my husband has a brother’ or ‘oh I have this great friend from work you’d just love,” you ranted, earning a quiet snicker from Suna, which prompted you to lift your head up so you could dig back at the cat hybrid who looked to be having far too much fun at your expense.
“They even asked me why I didn’t date my nice neighbor, the one I’m always hanging out with,” you added on ruthlessly, ignoring Ojirou’s shocked sputters, “But I told them he was in a committed relationship. They were skeptical at first, but then I told them that I was sure because someone is extremely loud, enough that I’m forced to use headphones to drown out the yowling.”
Poor Ojirou was coughing, clearly dying of embarrassment, and even Kita had the faintest red tinge to his cheeks. Unfortunately, Suna, unbothered as ever, simply smirked at you, which confirmed some of your suspicions that he’d been doing it on purpose, the brat.
Heaving another forlorn sigh you decided to give up and give poor Ojirou a break, making a mental note to make it up to him somehow. The poor guy really didn’t deserve to be caught in the crossfire between you and Suna.
“So, I spent the time being relentlessly hounded until it was time to leave,” you continued on, pretending not to notice Kita patting Ojirou’s back sympathetically, “I tried to explain to them that I just don’t have the time and energy it takes to go out and start dating people, that work was taking up too much of my time, but they weren’t having any of it.”
“It sounds like a rough time,” Ojirou told you, with genuine sympathy, the man too kind even after you’d embarrassed the hell out of him, “like when I go home and baa-chan asks when I’m going to settle down and get married.”
Suna let out an involuntary hiss at that, and Kita’s shoulders stiffened up a bit. Even though hybrid-human relationships were accepted and even almost expected between them and their owners these days, it didn’t mean that everyone accepted them as ‘true’ relationships. There were a good chunk of people, mostly conservatives and the older generation who believed that human/human relationships were the only valid ones.
This was no doubt because of the fact that most hybrid children, once they hit eighteen chose to go to hybrid adoption centers rather than staying with their parents. This was partly because it was one of the few good ways to get out from under your parents roof.
Hybrid rights had come a long way from when they’d first been implemented a few decades ago, back when they were considered something of a toy and a pet, not better than a slave. However, they technically still required a human ‘owner’ to do things like go to school, find a job, or even be out in public unsupervised.
There were people working to change that of course, and you’d donated heavily to the cause and actively supported it, but change was slow going, so for now it was what it was. It didn’t help that there were a good deal of people around like Ojirou’s grandma who viewed hybrids as less than human, and would probably never acknowledge his relationship or any children they had, especially if the children were hybrids too.
It was something you’d listened to him vent about more than once, happy to lend him a listening ear, especially since he’d done the same for you plenty of times over the years.
“It wasn’t quite that bad,” you admitted, giving him your own sympathetic smile, “but it was rather depressing.”
“Do ya even want a companion like that?” Kita asked her reasonably, “I don’t think I’ve ever heard ya talk about wantin’ a relationship other than rantin’ about a few failed dates here and there. If ya don’t I don’t see why it should be a problem, and not any of their business either.”
“Except I think I kind of do,” you admitted with a grimace, to the practical dog-hybrid who always gave solid, dependable advice, “I never planned to spend the rest of my life alone you know? I just always put my career first figuring relationships could come later, when I had more time, but now I’m starting to wonder if later will ever come.”
“And ya don’t want to date?” Kita asked with a slight frown, “I’m sure ya could make time if ya really wanted to, we could change our dinners around fer a while maybe?”
“No way,” you protested immediately, “Dinners with you guys are my only bastion of sanity. Plus I’m not even sure I want to go out and meet people, frankly at this point I’m not even sure I know how. It just… gets a little lonely coming home to an empty apartment sometimes you know?”
“So why don’t you get a hybrid?” Ojirou asked, his tone eminently reasonable despite the shock of what he’d said.
“A hybrid?” you repeated a little dumbfounded, “Me?!”
“Well why not?” he defended, stroking his recently grown goatee with his thumb and forefinger, “You’re wealthy enough to afford one, it would solve your companionship issue, and you wouldn’t have to date anyone, just go to a hybrid adoption center and find someone you’re compatible with.”
When he put it like that it did sound reasonable, even if it wasn’t an idea that had ever occurred to you. A lot of your friends, not just Ojirou, had hybrid companions, one of the weddings discussed earlier that day was even to a hybrid even if it wouldn’t be official until they could get proper legislature passed. You just had never really considered it an option for yourself.
“Do you think I could?” you asked with a light frown, turning the idea over in your mind, the question directed more at Kita than anyone else, both because he was always the most reasonable of the three and because as a hybrid you thought he’d probably be more qualified to answer whether you were a fit ‘owner’.
However to your surprise it wasn’t Kita, but Suna who answered first informing you in his normal lazy drawl, “You’d do well with a hybrid I think, probably something lower energy, like a cat, and we’re pretty self-sufficient as you know, so you wouldn’t have to worry about leaving it home alone like you would a pet.”
“He’s right,” Kita agreed, after a thoughtful pause, “Personally I believe ya would do well with a hybrid, ya get along with us well enough. Plus if yer worried we can help ya look after them. Suna needs a playmate anyway, he’s been getting’ up ta too much mischief lately when Aran and I ain’t here.”
Suna didn’t even bother to protest, just shrugged, completely unbothered by the accusation. Figuring you might as well take advantage of the situation you asked a few more questions, all of which were answered by your friends who all had a lot of input on what kind of hybrid you should get.
You left that night with your head stuffed full of information, after telling them you needed time to think it over. Getting a hybrid was a lifechanging thing and you didn’t want to run off half-cocked. It had gotten you an approving nod from Kita and a supportive pat on the shoulder from Ojirou. Suna had simply given you a knowing smirk, as if the smug cat hybrid already knew exactly what you were going to do as you walked out the door.
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You stared up at the hybrid adoption center, not quite sure how you’d ended up here. For the last week or so, ever since Ojirou had brought it up you’d had hybrids on the brain. You’d found your eyes wandering to look at them when they passed you in the street and idly daydreaming in your down time what it might be like to have one waiting when you came home and fantasizing about what kind you might get.
Normally you were very focused and productive at work, but somehow, you’d found yourself scrolling through different sites, putting in research into what kind of facility you should visit and what you’d need to do. It had gotten bad enough that some of your coworkers had noticed your distraction, which was the final nail in the coffin.
You’d already known which center Ojirou had used to choose Kita and Suna, and so at the end of a particularly long day, quietly dreading heading home to your empty apartment you’d instead found yourself driving over to the center.
It was on the smaller side when it came to hybrid adoption centers, privately run and owned by Azumane Industries, a fashion line that created clothes that specifically catered to hybrids. Ojirou had, had nothing but good things to say, and so gathering your courage you left your car to head resolutely inside.
The lobby was rather quiet, only one other patron and two people manning the desks, both of whom looked up when you entered. You were a bit surprised to see the only two workers in sight were hybrids, one a silver cat of some type and the other clearly a German shepherd.
In hindsight it made a lot of sense to have hybrids be in charge of the adoption of other hybrids as they would likely know best how to match people up. However, you rarely saw that kind of practicality when it came to hybrids especially because you knew there was a lot of prejudice out there.
You offered the cat a hesitant smile, stepping up to the desk, the smile he gave back one that was both kind and welcoming as he introduced, “Welcome to Azumane Industries Hybrid Adoption Center. My name is Sugawara, how can I help you today?”
“I’m looking to adopt,” you admitted, unsure what else to say you tacked on, “My friend recommended this place to me, so here I am.”
“Well, we’ll take good care of you,” he assured you calmly, “Usually we do this by appointment, but you’re lucky. It’s a slow day and we have an opening, so I’d be happy to start the process with you if you’re willing.”
“Great,” you told him with a quiet sigh of relief, glad that he could fit you in. Honestly you should’ve known that a place like this would require a call ahead at least. It would’ve served you right for being so impulsive if they hadn’t been able to squeeze you in, “Just tell me what I need to do.”
Sugawara offered you a sly grin, one that reminded you of Suna as he promptly pushed a large stack of paperwork in your direction and handed you a pen. You grimaced at the sight of it but set to work, quietly filling out the forms one by one and handing each of them to Sugawara after so he could log them into his computer.
The forms reminded you of a loan or job application in a lot of ways, asking after your health, your income, your living situation, if you had a criminal record, any previous experience with hybrids etc. It took you quite a while to fill them all out, and by the end of it your wrist was sore and you’d signed your name more times than you cared to remember. However, since Sugawara had been filling in as you went you didn’t have to wait long to move on to the next step.
“Congratulations,” he told you with an amused smile, watching as you massaged your wrist, “You’ve been approved to adopt from our center, which means we now get to the fun part.”
“Fun part?” you questioned a little warily, having learned from Suna that a cat hybrid smiling at you didn’t necessarily mean good things for your sanity.
“Tell me about what kind of hybrid you’d like,” he told you leaning forward, elbows braced on the desk as he watched you intently, “Do you have any preferences? I’ve read all your information as we’ve gone along so I have some ideas, but I’d like to hear from you what you think you want.”
“I’m not sure where to start,” you admitted, feeling a little overwhelmed.
“That’s alright,” he assured you, “That’s what I’m here for. Let’s start with species, that’s always good and will narrow things down a bit.”
“I know I want a cat or dog hybrid,” you told him immediately glad to have some kind of answer for him, “Rabbit and rodent hybrids have heats and ruts too often for me to handle given how busy work keeps me.”
Heats and ruts were one of the big things that separated hybrids from humans and were part of the reason it was hard for them to find and hold down jobs. There were two kinds of hybrid within each species, alphas and omegas.
Alphas were usually more aggressive, stubborn, and willful. You needed to have a more dominant personality to have an alpha hybrid otherwise they’d walk all over you. Alphas also had a period called a rut, where their hormones skyrocketed and made them want to breed with anything and everything. It was a really uncomfortable time for them, and made them even more aggressive.
Omegas were generally more passive, quiet and compliant. They tended to be favored over Alpha hybrids as companions because of their more docile nature. They had periods called heats, which were similar to an Alphas rut, the only difference being they wanted to be bred rather than to breed. It made them needy and clingy the entire time.
Both heats and ruts lasted anywhere from a couple of days to a week depending on the species of hybrid. Dogs and cats had week long heats, but they only happened two to three times a year, whereas rabbit and rodent hybrids only lasted a few days, but happened every week and a half to two weeks.
You knew it wasn’t necessarily expected for a hybrid owner to stay home when their hybrid was in heat or rut, but you also knew it was those times that hybrids tended to be more reckless. Most of the research you did advised that you should if you could, even if you weren’t the one who was going to be sexually intimate with your hybrid. There were of course hybrid heat centers, where hybrids could go to find willing partners and get their needs taken care of, but you’d heard horror stories about places like that and didn’t want to use one unless you absolutely had to.
“There are medications to manage heats and ruts,” Sugawara pointed out reasonably, a slight frown on his face.
“I know,” you agreed, “But I did some research and it looks like most hybrids don’t like to take them because they have nasty side effects, like potential infertility, mood drops, and weight gain. If there’s a rodent or rabbit hybrid that wants to voluntarily take the medication then that could be fine, but I’ve heard only a few ever want to risk it.”
Sugawara looked surprised for a moment, then slowly nodded, “It’s good you’ve looked into things, and it’s nice to see someone who’s come prepared. I’ve heard a bit of that too, so no rabbits or rodents. Do you have any preference Alpha versus Omega?”
“Not really,” you admitted with a helpless shrug, feeling a little bad for not being able to narrow down the criteria for him, “I’m pretty open so long as they can fit into my lifestyle, are a little more independent, and think they’ll get along with me.”
“Well you’ll at least have lots of options,” Sugwara assured you, with a smile that told you he wasn’t off put by the fact that you didn’t know exactly what you wanted either, “Does that mean you don’t have a preference for breed either?”
“That’s right,” you agreed with a firm nod, “I just want someone who’s going to be compatible with me, everything else is secondary.”
“Okay,” he told you cheerfully, “I’m sure we can do that! Though it might take us a little bit to narrow things down. Since you aren’t picky you might as well come with me to start looking. Daichi can you manage the desk on your own?”
“Sure,” the german shepherd hybrid agreed, from where he’d been sitting quietly, keeping watch over the two of you and typing away on his computer, since there was literally no one else in the lobby, “Just keep a radio on you so I can call you back up here if it gets busy Suga.”
Your soon to be guide agreed with a smile, plucking one of the aforementioned radios up and attaching it to his belt, before standing up from the desk. He stretched in a very feline manner, then ushered you towards a door that led toward the back of the building, tail swishing peacefully behind him.
“Each species of hybrid has its own floor,” Sugawara explained as he led you through the hall, “Bunnies are on the top floor, rodents underneath them, cats on the second floor and dogs here on the first. Each floor has four separate wings, separated into categories depending on whether the hybrid in question is male or female, alpha or omega. These wings have private rooms in them and are connected by a shared space.”
“We’ll be going into the shared space,” he explained pausing outside one of the doors, “It’s where hybrids come both to hang out, and to meet people. If a hybrid isn’t interested in being adopted by a specific human they’ll simply return to their rooms until the human leaves. This way we ensure that no one gets coerced into adoption. We also keep a close eye on things with security cameras in the shared space, for both the safety of humans and hybrids. Before we enter the room, I need you to give me verbal consent to allow yourself to be filmed.”
“That’s fine,” you told him, more than a bit impressed with how thorough and organized the whole thing was, along with the lengths they went to, to ensure everyone’s comfort.
“Alright then, let’s introduce you to the dogs,” he teased, with a confident smile.
The minute the door opened, almost every head turned in your direction, making you feel a bit awkward and unsure. Some of the hybrids were in their human forms, ears and tails the only hint of their non-human status, while others were lounging around in their secondary animal form.
The animal form of a hybrid was indistinguishable from a normal animal of the same breed. The only thing that might give it away was the high level of intelligence. Your research told you that hybrids tended to act more on their instincts when in animal form, which could be both a good thing and a bad thing.
Case in point, the minute you entered with Sugawara one enormous grey and white speckled dog came bounding over barking his head off. He was absolutely huge, and only the madly wagging tail kept you from cringing back as he charged over, his barking immediately setting off a few of the others.
You got the wind knocked out of you a bit as he collided with you, though thankfully the door was behind you, and kept you from being knocked off your feet as he placed enormous paws on your shoulders, burying his face in your hair and sniffing enthusiastically. You froze, unsure exactly what to do in this situation, and more than a bit uncomfortable.
Luckily Sugawara immediately came to your rescue, shoving the big dog off as he scolded, “Bokuto! What have I told you about jumping up on our guests!”
The big dog immediately began to whine, tail tucked between his legs, and you wanted to feel bad for him, except you were still a bit unnerved.
“Sorry about him,” Sugawara apologized with a sigh, “He’s harmless I promise, just incredibly enthusiastic about new people.”
“It’s okay,” you assured him, hesitantly reaching out to Bokuto palms first to see if he might be interested, only to have him turn away. Unsure what to do you glanced at Sugawara, whose tail was swishing in clear agitation.
“Ignore him,” the silver haired cat hybrid told you, “He’s just sulking because he got scolded. In fact, better yet ignore all of them, since they can’t stop being rude and barking.”
This last bit, along with the fierce glare that accompanied it was leveled at the room in general, earning some sheepish looks from a couple of the dog hybrids who were in human form, and managing to quiet several of the barking ones who were in animal form.
“Come on,” he urged with one last flick of his tail, “I should’ve started you with the cats anyway. You seem like a cat person to me, and I assure you they’ll have much better manners. If you don’t find what you’re looking for there, we’ll come back, but let’s explore the cat option first and give them time to recall their manners.”
You allowed him to usher you out of the room and toward the elevator, trusting his judgment. It was funny that he’d said you were a cat person, as he was actually the third cat hybrid to have told you so, Suna being one and the Siamese hybrid of one of your coworkers being the other.
It took you less than a minute to get up to the next floor, and when Sugawara ushered you into the cat hybrid room you could immediately feel the difference. There was no noise for one, just a bunch of curious eyes turned in your direction, but it didn’t feel hostile at all.
Sugawara quickly introduced you to the cat hybrids, telling them you’d come to adopt and had ‘just been slobbered all over by the dog hybrids’ so if they could all ‘mind their manners’ that would be great. You were a little amused at the exasperated hybrid’s antics, and you weren’t the only one, if the quiet snickering from a hybrid with particularly messy hair was any indication. However you were also grateful to him for being so diligent as he introduced you to everyone.
Slowly, several cat hybrids meandered up to you, some in human form, some in cat form, though some also stayed in place clearly observing everything. You chatted lightly with the ones in human form, while letting the ones in cat form do as they pleased, answering their questions and asking a few of your own.
It was a much more relaxed experience, something you were infinitely grateful for after the sudden chaos of the dog hybrid room, and you had to wonder if the cat hybrids who’d pegged you as a cat person hadn’t been right after all. You were in the middle of quietly talking to a lovely female alpha hybrid named Shimizu when Sugawara’s radio blared to life. Apparently, the front had gotten rather busy and Daichi desperately needed his help.
“Will you be alright if I leave you here?” Sugawara asked you seriously, “This shouldn’t take too long, and Shimizu is more than capable of looking after you.”
“Sure,” you agreed, after a quick glance at the hybrid in question, who gave an acknowledging nod of her head, “I don’t mind.”
“Good,” he agreed with a bright grin, before rounding on the rest of the room, “And all the rest of you better behave or I’ll hear why!”
With one last warning glare around the room he turned on his heel and left, leaving you in Shimizu’s capable hands. The two of you continued to talk amiably as several cat hybrids came by in one form or another to sniff at you or listen in on the conversation from nearby. A number of them only came over for a few minutes, lingered a bit and then left, spreading back out to the room or going into the hallways that led to their private rooms, however a good chunk of them stayed nearby as well.
Chatting lightly with Shimizu and a few of the others you found you really liked the poised and graceful cat hybrid and might’ve looked into adopting her. Unfortunately, Shimizu quickly made it clear that she had some plans of her own, that included getting herself and her young and adorable munchkin kitten hybrid Yachi adopted by one of their frequent visitors.
She was however, more than happy to give her own opinion on some of the other hybrids around, most of whom seemed to respect both her and her opinion a lot. You were listening to Shimizu tell you a bit more about Yachi, who was watching from a safe distance, clearly anxious, but also unwilling to leave, when you felt something paw at your leg.
A quick glance down revealed a long haired fluffy looking cat, in shades of silver and white who was staring up at you expectantly. None of the other cat hybrids had actually dared to touch you, a few coming close, but none making actual moves to greet you.
A little intrigued you crouched down so you’d be closer to his eye level, and extended your hands for him the same way you did for Suna when he was in his cat form, giving him a choice about whether he wanted to be touched or not. The cat hybrid eyed your hands thoughtfully for a minute, before sauntering within reach, nudging his head against your palm.
Taking your cue you allowed yourself to pet him, gently rubbing at his silky ears and enjoying the feeling of his thick, plush coat. His back arched pressing closer into your hands, eyelids lowering in contentment as you carefully massaged your fingers through his fur in a way you knew Suna enjoyed.
A rumbling purr escaped his throat and you couldn’t help the pleased smile that crossed your lips at the sound as he pressed his way closer to your torso, entering the circle of your arms and keeping himself there. You were caught up in petting him for a moment and didn’t immediately notice, but after a few seconds you realized the room had gotten very quiet.
It had been quiet before, as cat hybrids didn’t make a lot of noise in general, but now it was almost deathly still outside the small purring sounds from the cat under your hands. You immediately froze and glanced up at Kiyoko who was watching the two of you with wide eyes.
“Is something wrong?” you asked, more than a bit concerned.
“You pet him,” Shimizu murmured, more to herself than to you.
“Should I not have?” you asked worriedly, moving to pull your hands away, “I’m sorry I didn’t realize. I pet my neighbor’s cat hybrid all the time when he’s in the mood for it.”
The cat hybrid under your hands made a noise of protest as you pulled your hands away, giving Shimizu what you assumed to be a rather annoyed look based on her baffled and slightly contrite expression.
“No,” she assured you quickly, “We like to be pet, physical affection is important to hybrids. It’s just that particular one doesn’t usually allow anyone to touch him.”
“Do you mind?” you asked the hybrid in question, holding out your hands again.
He gave an agreeing mew and pressed his head to your palm, which you assumed meant you could resume petting. The fur under your fingers was clearly well taken care of, soft and plush and you truly wouldn’t have minded continuing to pet him until he got sick of you.
However, you were interrupted by a furious yowling sound that immediately made you jump, your head snapping up to search for the source of the noise. It turned out to be another long haired fluffy cat, this one in shades of gold and white who came charging out of the halls and ran straight at you.
You didn’t even have a second to react as the cat that had been in your arms darted around to hide behind you. Not that it stopped the oncoming golden one who didn’t even bother to go around and instead went right over you, claws digging into your arm as he attempted to get at the silver one.
You let out a yelp of surprise and pain, as he launched himself off your shoulder at the silver cat behind you who immediately darted out of reach, running around you in dizzying circles with the golden one fast on his heels both of them yowling, hissing and spitting, clearly having some kind of argument.
It only took a moment for you to regain your bearings and decide you needed to put an end to whatever this was, since poor Shimizu didn’t look at all ready to step in, an utterly appalled look on her face. Luckily you had quick reflexes and managed to snag both cats around the middle and stand up quickly, the abrupt shift immediately silencing both, no doubt shocked by your interruption.
“I think that’s quite enough of that,” you scolded firmly, as you hefted the two carefully, keeping them firmly separated. They were a bit heavier than they looked but certainly not too much for you to keep aloft.
“You,” you scolded the golden one, gently shaking him, who had turned to stare up at you with wide copper colored eyes, “I don’t know what he did to you or why, but I’m sure whatever it was could’ve been resolved without the ruckus. I also don’t appreciate being climbed on or used as a spring board.
“And you,” you gently shook the silver one in turn, who looked equally surprised to be addressed, “I’m not sure if he deserved whatever you did or not, but you shouldn’t have been causing a ruckus either, and I don’t appreciate you using me as a shield.”
“From what I understand, in order to be here you have to be considered adults,” you continued firmly, “So I suggest you act like it, and figure this out between yourselves without dragging innocent bystanders into your mess!”
With that you loosened your grip, fully expecting both of them to jump to the floor. However, both continued to simply hang limply in your grasp, watching you with curious eyes that you realized rather abruptly were almost completely identical.
“Siblings huh?” you asked no one in particular, nodding to yourself, “I suppose that explains a lot.”
“Are you alright?” Shimizu asked you worriedly, “You’re bleeding.”
A quick glance at your arm showed you were indeed bleeding, small pinpricks of blood welling up from where the golden cat had dug his claws into you. It stung a bit, but you didn’t think it was too bad.
“I’m alright,” you assured her, kneeling down and releasing both cats, since they seemed disinclined to continue fighting, and you wanted your hands free, “Though I’d appreciate some disinfectant and some band aids if you’ve got them.”
“Of course,” Shimizu assured you with a quick nod, “Just let me get them and I’ll be right back.”
The elegant hybrid moved with enviable grace and speed as she exited the room, leaving you alone. A quick look around the room showed that almost every eye was now on you, and you heaved a sigh, not exactly pleased to be the center of attention, especially since none of them did anything but stare, none of them bothering to approach, just look.
You glanced down in surprise when you felt something touching your leg, only to find the golden cat headbutting your shin, rubbing his face against your calf affectionately as he twined his way through your legs.
“Does that mean you’re sorry,” you asked, crouching back down and offering your hands to the pretty, fluffy cat.
He immediately rubbed his face against your hands too, which you took as permission to continue your petting, rubbing your hand affectionately over his head and earning a happy purr from the feline who arched happily into your hands.
You were distracted from your petting by a paw, which came to rest on one of your wrists, the silver cat watching with obvious envy in his pretty copper colored eyes. Luckily for both of you, you had two hands, and you reached out to pet him too after assuring it was okay. The golden cat clearly wasn’t too happy about his brother’s presence, but didn’t kick up a fuss, instead pressing himself closer and becoming more insistent as he purred ever louder. The silver cat didn’t seemed to pay him any attention though, simply soaking up your attention and affection.
“Here,” Shimizu offered as she came back, first aid kit in hand, “Do you need any help getting bandaged up?”
You were about to accept her offer, as attempting to bandage your dominant arm was always a pain, when you felt something strange under your hand. You turned your attention back to the cat hybrids you’d been petting just in time to see the silver one shift, form becoming large, limbs extending, body lengthening and bulking up until he stood in front of you in human form.
You blinked, utterly startled as you stared up at him, taking in his appearance. He was incredibly handsome in his human form, with the same silvery grey hair as his fur in cat form in an undercut and bright bronze eyes that peered out at you from under heavy lids. He had a strong, slightly square jaw and thick eyebrows, with blunt cheekbones and cupids bow lips.
He was also surprisingly big, at least six feet tall, and maybe a bit more than that, with broad shoulders and a trim waist. He was wearing a simple black t-shirt that clung to his chest, showing off the definition of his muscles. To top it all off he had two cat ears poking out from his silvery hair and a fluffy tail that was slowly waving back and forth as he looked at you.
“I’ll do it,” he told the two of you, his voice pleasant and lightly accented, his hand held out to Kiyoko gesturing for her to pass him the first aid kit, “I’ll bandage ya up. It’s only fair since the moron who scratched ya is too busy bein’ pampered.”
That earned a hiss from the golden cat, who immediately began to shift under your hands. You watched in surprise and no small amount of awe as he turned into a carbon copy of the other man who’d appeared, only with golden hair, ears and tail. You’d realized the two were related, but you hadn’t realized they were identical twins. Twins were really rare for hybrids, even more rare than human twins. As such they were usually snapped up for adoption right away, so it was rare to see them in any sort of center.
“If ya hadn’t stolen my puddin’ I wouldn’t have chased ya and scratched her in the first place,” the golden cat hybrid hissed at his brother.
“Well if ya hadn’t eaten my onigiri, maybe I wouldn’t have had to eat yer puddin’” the silver haired one retorted, his tone and expression both flatter compared to his sibling who looked like he might lunge at his twin at any moment.
Not wanting to get in the middle of a literal cat fight you held your own hand out to Kiyoko, who gratefully placed the first aid kit in your hands, then plopped down to sit cross legged on the floor. Your sudden movement startled both cat hybrids who turned to look at you, but you pointedly ignored them as you worked on opening the kit, and pulling out the things you’d need.
“Here I got it,” the golden haired one told you, plopping down beside you, “That scrub ain’t right about a lot of things, but he is right about this. I scratched ya, and I should fix ya.”
You gratefully held your arm out to him, and watched as he gently dabbed the scratches with disinfectant, grimacing slightly at the sting. You were distracted enough by his careful movements that you almost didn’t notice the other twin, right up until he gently smeared Neosporin over the scratches, placing small bandages over the deeper punctures.
“Thank you,” you told them both when they finished, automatically reaching up to pet their heads, but then pausing as you realized the gesture might not be as welcome in their human form.
Your worries were quickly allayed through as the golden one practically fell into your palm, soft, happy purring noises leaving his mouth as you gently scratched the base of his ears. His twin however didn’t immediately move for you, and you turned concerned eyes on him, worried he might be offended. The minute he saw you looking though he immediately leaned forward, pressing his head to your palm, his own soft purrs leaving his throat as you carded your fingers through his hair.
“I’m back,” a familiar voice sang, the door to the room sliding open to reveal Sugawara, with a cheerful grin on his face, a grin that was immediately replaced by wide eyed shock as he saw you and the two hybrids who were nearly in your lap with how close they were pressing towards you.
However, shock melted into fury as his eyes saw the open first aid kit and the bandages on your arm, his words nearly a hiss as he demanded, “What happened?!”
Both hybrids immediately stiffened under your hands, drawing closer to you, either looking to protect you or looking for protection you weren’t sure. Either way you allowed it, rubbing your hands over the backs of their necks in a way that always seemed to sooth Suna as you answered, “We just had a bit of a mishap is all, but we’ve cleared it up.”
“Are you sure?” Sugawara demanded anxiously, “We were told when they were brought in that they’d had a bit of trouble before, but they never mentioned that they might attack humans.”
The golden-haired twin seemed to bristle, and if he were in cat form you were sure all his fur would be puffed out as he glared at Sugawara. His twin didn’t look nearly as bothered on the surface, but close as you were, you could see how tight the muscles in his neck and shoulders were as if he was about to spring forward at any moment.
Instinctively you pulled the golden twin toward you, tipping him over into your lap. Despite his size it wasn’t all that difficult given he’d been practically leaning all his weight on you. He let out a yelp of surprise, but stayed still as you buried your fingers in his hair, keeping his cheek pillowed on your thigh. Your other hand gently squeezed the back of the silver twin’s neck, both holding him still and reminding him of your presence.
“It wasn’t an attack, simply an accident,” you assured Sugawara, as you soothed your thumb over the tense muscles of the silver one’s neck, hoping to get him to relax, “A bit like what happened with the dog hybrid earlier.”
“If you’re sure,” Sugawara told you, watching your pet the twins with wide eyes, like he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing, “Does that mean you’ve decided to take them then? I know you were a little worried about adopting one hybrid so I never imagined you’d want two at once.”
“What?” you asked, a little overwhelmed by the sudden onslaught of information, and the assumption he’d made.
“You’d have to take both of them,” Sugawara explained gently, “Admittedly sometimes twins are separated, but we don’t do that unless they want to be separated, and in this case both of them have stated they want to stay together.”
“That makes sense,” you agreed, with a smile. It was good that the center accommodated things like that, and you made a mental note to thank Ojirou for directing you to such an upstanding place.
“Should I get paperwork started?” Sugawara asked, with an answering smile, “If you’re taking the twins it will take a bit more work than usual, so I’d like to get started right away. No pressure though, you don’t have to make a decision today if you don’t want to.”
“I hadn’t really thought about adopting them,” you admitted, and felt both twins stiffen under your hands, so hurried to reassure them, “We haven’t had a chance to chat much yet. I’d like to talk to them a little bit first before we make any decisions.”
“Of course,” the kindly hybrid agreed with an understanding nod, “We’ll give the three of you some space and let you get to know one another a bit better.”
“Thank you,” you told him politely, waiting until he’d ushered Kiyoko a little bit away, clearly trying to give you some sense of privacy despite the fact that they were still well within earshot for hybrids, and likely interrogate the elegant female about what exactly had happened while he was gone.
“Do ya not want us,” the golden haired one asked you, once the two were gone, rolling over in your lap to peer up at you with wide copper eyes, the hint of a pout on his lips, and a little bit of hurt in his eyes.
“I don’t know yet,” you told him honestly, gently stroking his golden hair away from his eyes, “We don’t know each other, yet do we? Do you even know if you want to come with me?”
The two cat hybrids glanced at each other, clearly communicating silently with each other for a moment before turning back to you. The golden haired one had apparently been elected spokesperson because he was the one to admit, “We wouldn’t mind goin’ home with ya.”
“But you don’t even know my name, do you? And I don’t know yours either,” you pointed out, utterly baffled that they’d apparently already decided.
“I heard mister pleasant over there when he introduced ya,” the silver haired one told you with a shrug, “But if it matters so much to ya, I’m Miya Osamu and he’s Atsumu.��
“I can introduce myself ya know,” the golden haired on hissed, doing his best to glare at his brother, though you were sure the effect was entirely lost considering he was apparently refusing to move from your lap and was upside down, “And I didn’t get to hear yer name.”
“That’s because ya were sulkin’ in our room,” Osamu pointed out.
“And whose fault is that huh?” Atsumu demanded with a grimace.
“Yer own,” Osamu countered, looking utterly bored as he peered down at his brother. Atsumu made to lunge out of your lap, but was stopped by your hand pressed firmly to his forehead holding him in place. You took advantage of his moment of distraction to introduce yourself, gently rubbing behind his ears until he started purring again.
“And ya wonder why we want to go with ya,” Osamu told you sardonically, watching the two of you, “I ain’t ever seen anybody who could get ahold of Tsumu like that.”
“Do the two of you always squabble like that?” you asked, a little amused and a little concerned, “If I didn’t know better I would’ve thought one of you was a dog hybrid with how well you’re getting along right now.”
“It ain’t always so bad,” Osamu told you, turning his face away though you thought you saw the faintest hint of pink to his cheeks, “We’re just a little restless is all. We haven’t been here long so it’s just new, not as much freedom as we’re used to either bein’ cooped up for most of the day.”
“Surely they let you out if you want out,” you questioned, a little appalled that the center might be keeping hybrids like prisoners.
“Well sure,” Osamu answered turning back to you, his head tilted to the side as he studied you, “But there are only so many places a hybrid is allowed without an owner ya know.”
You winced slightly at the blunt statement, but couldn’t refute it. The law stated that all hybrids had to have a registered owner, and it was then up to that owner to set limits on the hybrid, about where they could go and what they could do. This was because if the hybrid caused any trouble, it was always on its owner to take responsibility which made things quite limited for them at times. There were lobbyists working to change that of course, as it was viewed as inhumane, but for now the law was the law.
“Did you have more freedom before here then?” you asked curiously, “I’ve heard this place is pretty good.”
“It’s not bad,” Atsumu piped in, his voice content and rumbly as he turned languid eyes in your direction, clearly not wanting to be left out of the conversation, “Better than the first center we were at when we first went up for adoption.”
“So you’ve been adopted before? Or did you just get moved from one of the other centers?” you asked curiously, only to have Atsumu go absolutely rigid under your hands as Osamu hissed at him, clearly angry with his brother, who’d apparently revealed something he shouldn’t if the way he shrank away instead of hissing back said anything.
You glanced between the two of them warily, unsure what to do as Atsumu pulled himself out of your lap so he could look at Osamu. The two of them were clearly communicating, both their tails swishing back and forth in clear agitation.
“We had an owner,” Osamu admitted at last, his words clearly careful as he peered at you from underneath the fringe of his hair, “But we didn’t get along with him so he surrendered us ta the shelter again and they sent us here.”
A part of you really wanted to ask why exactly they hadn’t gotten along with their old owner, but given the way Atsumu was refusing to meet your eyes, his nails practically digging into his thighs where he sat next to you, you got the feeling it would be kinder not to. Instead you carefully redirected the conversation back on topic and asked, “And what makes you think you’ll get along better with me than your previous owner?”
“Yer nothin’ like him,” Osamu told you bluntly, effectively shutting that avenue of conversation down.
“If you say so,” you told him calmly, holding his gaze until he glanced away, his hands clenched into fists at his sides.
It was clearly a sensitive topic, and you didn’t want to push. You’d just met the two of them today after all, you certainly wouldn’t have liked it if they tried to pry into your past, fair was fair after all.
“What do you picture yourselves doing all day?” you asked instead, figuring you might as well.
“Doing?” Atsumu repeated confused, tilting his head in a manner that you couldn’t help but find rather adorable.
“I’ll be at work most of the day during the week,” you explained patiently, “Which means you’ll be by yourselves for quite a bit of time. You’d be more than welcome to laze around if you really wanted to, but I figured I’d ask.”
“What kind of things are we allowed to do?” Osamu asked slowly, a strange look on his face that you couldn’t quite interpret.
“Anything within reason,” you told him with a helpless shrug, “I have money, it’s not an issue, so long as it’s legal, and doesn’t have the potential to hurt me, you or anyone else then I see no reason to place restrictions. My neighbor has a dog-hybrid who works a small rice farm that Ojirou bought him, but his cat-hybrid Suna spends most of his time either lounging around their apartment or playing sports with some of the other hybrids who live in the neighborhood.”
“Which sport?” Atsumu asked, eyes bright, all hesitation forgotten in the face of this new information.
“Volleyball I think,” you told him with a shrug, “Ojirou and I have gone to watch a few games, though I don’t think it’s just volleyball either.”
If Atsumu had been a dog-hybrid you were sure his tail would’ve been wagging a hundred miles an hour with how eager he looked, copper eyes bright in his face as he told you, “I like volleyball. Do you think he’d let me play?”
“You’d have to take it up with Suna, but I don’t see why he wouldn’t,” you admitted cautiously, earning a happy smile from the hybrid.
“What about you Osamu?” you prompted gently, “Do you play too, or is there something else you’re interested in?”
The silver furred hybrid looked startled to be addressed, but then slowly admitted, “I like to cook.”
“That’s amazing,” you praised, “I live on take out a lot of the time, unless I’m headed over to Ojirou’s or Kita, his dog-hybrid makes an extra bento for me. I really should cook more, but I tend to be on the go a lot and don’t want to dedicate the time.”
“It’s a bit of a shame though,” you admitted, feeling more than a bit sheepish, “One of the best features of my apartment is the kitchen and I hardly ever use it.”
You continued to chat lightly with the twins learning quite a bit about the two of them in the process. Atsumu was definitely the louder twin, always eager and a bit blunt with his words, always saying the first thing that came to mind. Osamu was quieter than his twin, letting his golden furred brother do most of the talking for the two of them. He wasn’t necessarily shy per se, and would answer when spoken to, but he seemed content for the most part to quietly observe before adding his two cents in.
The two of them together were utterly charming, which made you wonder just how they hadn’t been adopted yet. You were fairly sure it must have something to do with the reason they’d been returned to their adoption center, though for the life of you, you couldn’t guess what that reason might’ve been.
“Sorry to interrupt,” Sugawara cut in gently, interrupting Atsumu telling you all about the last volleyball game he’d played in, “But the center is closing to visitors in a few minutes.”
“I’m sorry,” you apologized immediately, hurriedly scrambling to your feet, feeling more than a bit guilty, “I hadn’t realized how late it had gotten.”
“That’s alright,” Sugawara assured you with a kind smile, “It sounds like the three of you are getting along well.”
“I think so,” you admitted, glancing at the twins who’d both risen to their feet as well, both of them far more graceful than you could ever hope to be.
Both of them were watching you, Atsumu with tentative hope clear on his face, and Osamu completely unreadable except for the agitated twitch of his tail which told you he wasn’t pleased your conversation had been interrupted.
“I’m glad,” Sugawara told you, “Do we have any kind of decision made?”
“I…” you started glancing between the twins, who were both looking at you. Gut instinct meant you wanted to say yes. You’d gotten along well and you thought you might continue to enjoy one another’s company. They seemed like they’d slot into your life pretty easily. However you were still a bit hesitant. Adopting one hybrid had seemed like a big deal, but adopting two?
Plus you’d only met them today. Maybe you were being overly cautious but a single day didn’t seem like nearly enough time to get to know someone before inviting them to live with you, no matter how much your heart urged you to say yes.
“Actually, it doesn’t matter,” Sugawara interrupted, an apologetic expression on his face, pulling you from your thoughts as he explained, “We wouldn’t have time to finish the paperwork before it’s time to close, so you wouldn’t be able to take them home with you anyway, not today at least.”
“But…!” Atsumu tried to protest, but quelled as Sugawara shot him a stern look.
“I think that it will be good for all of you to sleep on your decision,” the cat-hybrid told all three of you firmly, gently beginning to usher you from the room, before telling you, “You can come back tomorrow if you like. We’re open at the same times then.”
“Alright,” you agreed, following after him without a fuss, only to pause in your tracks at a heartbreaking mewling sound.
You turned around to see Atsumu staring after you with devastation written all over his handsome features, his hand outstretched like he was trying to reach out and physically stop you from leaving. Before you’d really thought about it your feet had carried you back, and you’d pulled the hybrid into your arms.
Atsumu clutched you tightly, burying his face in your neck and rubbing his cheek against yours in a move you recognized as scenting. You let him do as he pleased without protest, gently running your fingers through his soft golden hair. However, you were conscious of Sugawara waiting for you, so you gently extracted yourself after a few minutes.
Turning you saw Osamu watching you with an unreadable expression on his face, but you stepped toward him, offering your open arms anyway, waiting patiently. You were rewarded for that patience as he stepped into your hold, nuzzling at you the same way his twin had on the opposite side.
“I’ll come back,” you found yourself promising, “I have work tomorrow, but after I’ll be here.”
Osamu drew back and peered into your face, copper eyes boring into your own, clearly searching for something before nodding, “We’ll hold ya to that.”
You let Sugawara usher you out after that, but found yourself tearing up a bit as you followed after him. You desperately didn’t want to leave the twins behind. Somehow, someway you’d gotten terribly attached to them in just a few short hours.
Your sniffling apparently caught Sugawara’s attention, because he turned around and hurriedly fumbled a packet of tissues from one of his pockets.
“I’m sorry,” he told you apologetically, “I thought maybe you wanted more time to think things over. We can still do paperwork tonight if you want I don’t mind staying a bit late.”
You looked at him, startled that he’d apparently picked up on your hesitation as you gratefully accepted the tissues, dabbing at your eyes and blowing your nose before replying, “No, no you’re right. It’s not a decision I should make impulsively. I do want to think it over I just…”
You trailed off helplessly, unsure what to say or how to explain that you’d gotten incredibly attached and were currently having a crisis as your head and heart were at war with each other. However, Sugawara apparently understood as he nodded in clear sympathy.
“Don’t worry,” he assured you, “That’s completely understandable, adopting a hybrid is no small thing. Those troublesome twins will still be here waiting for you tomorrow, so take all the time you need to think it over.”
“I will,” you told him, then tacked on sincerely, “Thank you, for all your help today. I really appreciate it.”
“It’s my pleasure,” he told you with a bright, pleased smile as he walked you to the door, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“See you tomorrow,” you agreed with a smile, letting yourself out and heading back for your car.
The drive home your thoughts were absolutely full of the twins, and what it might be like to have them with you. Your heart and your mind were at war with one another, your heart desperate to run back to the center as soon as it opened in the morning for the cat hybrids, and your head worrying about what it might mean to have both of them and why they’d been returned to the center by their previous owner.
You were so preoccupied with your thoughts that you almost didn’t notice Suna as you walked passed Ojirou’s door, headed to your own.
“What is that?” Suna demanded, his voice making you pause in your tracks.
“What is what?” you asked him baffled as he strode toward you nose in the air, clearly picking up something.
“You smell like hybrid,” he informed you his tone accusatory, watching you with narrowed golden eyes.
“Do I?” you asked mildly.
“You do,” he affirmed, “Doesn’t she Kita?”
“Doesn’t she what?” the collie hybrid asked, emerging from somewhere deeper in the apartment.
“Smell like hybrid,” Suna explained, his tail twitching languidly behind him and eyes alight with interest.
“You do,” Kita agreed, after carefully scenting the air, “Two of them actually.”
“Really?” Suna asked, clearly surprised, moving closer to sniff at you again, “You sure?”
You held still, too used to his behavior to be bothered by it, partly amused and partly annoyed at the cat hybrid who was clearly digging for information.
“Yes I’m sure,” Kita told him calmly, “They’re very similar, but there.”
“They’re identical twins,” you explained, figuring the jig was up anyway, and hoping maybe Ojirou or Kita would have some advice that might help you with your quandary.
“Ho?” Suna asked a purr of interest in his voice as he inhaled and nodded to himself, then asked slyly, “And what were you doing with these twins to have their scent on you so thoroughly?”
“Is Ojirou home?” you asked Kita, completely ignoring Suna’s question, earning a chuckle of amusement from the Siamese.
“He’s here,” Kita agreed, “Did you need to speak with him?”
“Both of you, if you have a minute?” you questioned hopefully.
“For you? Always,” Kita assured you kindly ushering you in.
“Oya, I think I’m hurt,” Suna told you as he followed along behind, a feline smirk on his face, “What about me? Don’t you want my advice too? After all they’re cat hybrids aren’t they?”
“They are,” you agreed with a huff as you plopped into your normal chair, “But are you going to give me good advice, or are you going to say whatever you think will be most amusing for you?”
“What’s this about cat-hybrids?” Ojirou asked, emerging from the hallway, where Kita had gone to fetch him.
“She’s thinking about adopting twin cat-hybrids,” Suna informed him before you had the chance to speak up, smug as the cat who got the canary.
“Are you really?” Ojirou questioned with a grin, taking his own seat.
“Yes,” you agreed, shooting the smug Siamese a look for interrupting and stealing your thunder, “I went to that adoption center you recommended today.”
“That’s great,” Ojirou told you, leaning forward in his chair eagerly, “How did it go?”
You explained your meeting with the twins, happily accepting the drink Kita pressed into your hands, which was your favorite, as the collie hybrid got everyone settled and then settled in himself to listen. You talked about how much you liked them, but your wariness about getting not one but two hybrids, and the strange issue with them having a previous owner and being so cagey about it.
“I can see why you’re wary about used goods,” Suna noted.
“Don’t call them that,” you snapped, despite the fact that you could hear the tinge of sarcasm in his voice and knew he didn’t really mean it, unable to help yourself, “people aren’t like items, and shouldn’t be treated like them.”
“She’s right,” Kita told the Siamese sternly, “Even as a joke, that was a rude way to refer to them.”
Suna slouched in his seat, looking thoroughly chastised as he admitted, “I know you don’t see them like that. You’ve always treated us just like normal people.”
“That’s because you are just like normal people,” you told him, stroking your fingers through his hair to let him know you forgave him, “Just with enhanced senses and a different set of instincts at times.”
“I don’t know why you think you need our advice,” Ojirou pointed out reasonably, “It sounds like you’ve pretty much already made up your mind, you clearly adore them already.”
“It’s just a lot,” you admitted, “Do you think I can handle twin hybrids? Especially since I’ve never even had one before? I mean, I’m not like you, none of my family ever had one growing up, and the only ones I really know are Kita, Suna, and a couple that come into the office with Tendou from time to time.”
“We’re not exactly children,” Kita reasoned, logically, “We don’t actually require all that much care outside of the basics, which I know you’re monetarily able to provide, and companionship, which is the whole reason you decided to seek out a hybrid in the first place. One or two, does it really matter? It might even be better as they’ll be able to keep each other company if they get lonely when you’re gone, and I see no reason we can’t help you look after them too.”
“You’d do that?” you asked the collie hybrid, surprised.
“Of course,” he agreed with a tiny smile, “We’re friends are we not?”
You smiled at him, touched, and extremely reassured by his ever cool logic. It did make sense, and quelled some of your worries, plus knowing the extremely reliable hybrid would help you out if you needed it was incredibly comforting.
“I wouldn’t worry about them being returned to their center,” Suna told you, surprisingly serious, “Hybrids get returned for all sorts of reasons, but most of the time its owner incompatibility rather than behavioral issues. Plus that center wouldn’t let you adopt them if they thought they’d give you trouble.”
“But Sugawara did say they’d heard the twins gave someone trouble,” you admitted, recalling the conversation with the worried cat-hybrid.
“Yes, but they didn’t give you trouble,” Suna pointed out, “We cat hybrids tend to make up our minds pretty quickly about people. It sounds like they decided they liked you, and unless something really terrible happens they’ll keep liking you, we’re terribly stubborn that way.”
“If you’re really worried you can always ask the center about it,” Ojirou told you, “They keep records, and would probably tell you, especially if it’s a concern about their adoptability.”
“I don’t want to pry into something and lose their trust,” you admitted, even as part of you was incredibly tempted to do just that.
“Then maybe try asking if the center if they think whatever the issue was, will be an issue with you,” Suna reasoned, “And if they say no then let it lie and adopt them, and if they say maybe or yes, then tell the twins you can’t accept them if they can’t tell you what the issue was.”
“That seems fair to me,” Kita agreed with a nod, “Just make sure you’re honest and tell them you asked, just in case.”
“Okay,” you agreed, letting out a relieved breath, “Okay that sounds really reasonable to me. It’s just… do you think I’m rushing into this too fast? I mean going to the center today was an impulse.”
“I don’t think so,” Ojirou assured her thoughtfully, “You’ve been thinking about it for a while, haven’t you?”
“She’s put so much thought into it she’s actually over thought it,” Suna interjected wryly before you had a chance to answer.
You made a face at him but couldn’t actually argue. He might have a point about overthinking it. Reassured you spent a good couple hours talking with your neighbor and the two hybrids as they answered more of your questions, and you told them about the twins.
Eventually however you headed home, determined now to get at least a little bit prepared for the arrival of your two new housemates tomorrow. Luckily it wasn’t dirty, but running a load of laundry and doing a little vacuuming never hurt anyone. You didn’t have a whole lot for them and didn’t know what kind of things they might have or need, but hopefully your office with pull out futon and guest bedroom would suffice for now until you could take them shopping.
Falling into bed that night you let yourself feel your excitement for the first time. You were adopting a hybrid, not just one but adorable twin hybrids. You couldn’t wait to bring them home and maybe put an end to your loneliness once and for all.
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Osamu glanced slowly around the room, trying not to look at his twin, the clock, or the doors to the main area of the shared living space the way Atsumu was. Yesterday had been a bit of a revelation. He’d never actually expected to approach the woman who’d shown up looking to adopt. After what happened with their last owner he’d never expected to ever actually want to be adopted again. However, somehow he’d found himself entranced by her, and he had no one but himself to blame.
When he’d initially strolled over, it was because he’d known via his bond to his older twin that he’d finally realized that Osamu had snagged his pudding for himself and was throwing a fit about it. He’d thought that his twin wouldn’t dare make a fuss if he was with a potential owner.
The rules of this place were pretty lax compared to the first center they’d lived in. It allowed them a lot more freedoms. It let them come and go from their rooms as they pleased rather than on a regimented schedule, and allowed them to turn down any potential adopter that they didn’t like, which had felt utterly shocking and unprecedented when he’d first been told about it. They gave them a small allowance they could spend or save as they chose, and even let them deal with their heats and ruts in whatever way they chose, including with other tenants so long as birth control was used.
It honestly felt like heaven compared to the first center they’d been at, and maybe even better than living with their previous owner even before everything had gone to shit. He wasn’t sure he’d even ever wanted to leave, which he’d been assured by several other tenants was also an option if he so desired.
However, the one rule that was the same between both centers was that they weren’t allowed to cause trouble with the humans that came looking to adopt. This was only good sense considering how much the law favored humans in cases of hybrid vs human issues. However, unlike the first center they’d lived, this one at least didn’t threaten to put them down if they misbehaved.
They’d been young back then, everyone in that center was, all of them below the age of twenty-one, because anyone who reached their twenty-second birthday disappeared and was never seen again. Thus he hadn’t known it was actually against the law to kill hybrids, none of them had known and the caretakers had perpetuated the rumor that those who reached twenty-two were killed instead of shipped off to other centers in order to make them that much more desperate to be adopted.
It had made him more than a bit bitter once he’d been with their new owner long enough to learn more about what was and wasn’t allowed when it came to human hybrid interactions. The man had actually found their previous beliefs amusing and had laughed at them more than once for being so naïve.
It was positively galling, and had made his hackles rise more than once. However he’d known better than to lash out and had better impulse control than Atsumu who’d been punished by their previous owner more than once for acting aggressively. Fortunately, Osamu had never liked being made fun of, and spite was a powerful motivator, meaning he’d practically memorized any and all of the laws that had to do with hybrids.
It meant the few times their owner had toed the line with Atsumu’s punishments that he’d been able to cite the law to pull him back, right up until their owner had decided he no longer cared and pushed too far, leading to them being removed from his home and put back up for adoption at this new center.
They had been here for just over a month and while several people had been interested in adopting the ‘rare gold and silver hybrid twins’ he had absolutely refused to engage with any of them. It was probably why that female alpha hybrid had been so shocked when he’d first approached.
He’d fully intended to just use the human to keep Atsumu at bay, right up until she’d crouched down and offered her hands to him and he’d gotten a whiff of her scent. He’d known from the few lessons their ma had bothered to teach them that hybrids relied a lot more on their sense of smell than humans did, and that scent was the basis of the instinct that told them who would be a good mate and who wouldn’t.
He’d originally thought compatibility could only be found with other hybrids, after all he’d met plenty of humans before both when he’d lived in the adoption centers and with his previous owner and never once had he gotten a hint of compatibility with any of them. He thought he could be forgiven for completely losing his head and giving over to his instincts as he caught the scent of the most compatible person he’d ever met.
Her scent was honestly indescribable, and his instincts had him purring within seconds as he tried to rub her scent all over himself. She’d obliged, petting him with fingers that had felt magical, her touch kind and soothing and perfect as she rubbed his ears, carded fingers through his fur and rubbed her hand along his back.
He’d been lost in a dizzy haze of touch and scent and probably would’ve remained that way if not for the fury of his brother, which had jolted him out of it. It had been like a bucket of cold water dumped over his head pulling him from his happy haze and reminding him of the whole reason he’d come up to the human in the first place.
He probably should’ve run off, but hadn’t been able to bring himself to move very far, instead darting around to hide behind her. He’d thought that once Atsumu saw her he’d stop and at least hold off attempting to get vengeance until later, but he’d overestimated his brother again, who was apparently more incensed than he’d guessed about the lost pudding.
Instinct had kicked in and before he’d really thought about it he was running away from his brother, darting around her legs in a game of chase that was both amusing and a bit annoying, especially when he could tell how much it was pissing his brother off, his sibling’s annoyance pulsing down their bond in waves of sparks.
He wasn’t sure how long it would’ve continued, as they’d actually run around like this until someone got tired before, usually Atsumu as he got fed up and didn’t have the patience to keep going. However, he’d suddenly found himself plucked right up into the air.
He’d been amused when she’d scolded Atsumu, though the amusement had faded a bit when she’d decided to scold him too, leaving him feeling properly chastised. He’d been more than a bit pissed off with his brother when he’d realized the nice smelling woman was bleeding because of him, though there’d also been a small frisson of fear, wondering what the consequences would be.
However, to his surprise she hadn’t actually seemed all that angry with either of them. Instead she’d immediately accepted Atsumu’s apologies as his brother, who’d managed to get a lungful of her scent had cuddled up to her. He could feel Atsumu’s deep interest in the human. His brother clearly also scented compatibility with her, which wasn’t surprising given they’d shared almost everything else in their lives.
He’d found himself more than a little bit jealous as he’d watched his brother soak up her attention. It had always been like that to an extent. Atsumu had always been the more outgoing one, the one who attracted attention, who wore his heart on his sleeve and somehow managed to win people over despite his often crass personality. Osamu had always kind of faded into the background as he was much quieter and had better control over his emotions, the silver to his gold, the shadow to his light.
Normally he didn’t mind, but this time being forgotten had stung. They’d always competed with each other, but most of the time he’d been humoring his brother, or simply hadn’t wanted Atsumu to win rather than wanting the prize of winning himself. This time though it had felt like more than that. No way was he going to let his brother steal her all to himself.
Before he’d really thought about it he’d reached out a paw, and to her credit she’d immediately offered him a sweet smile and resumed her wonderful petting. Atsumu hadn’t been pleased, but he hadn’t cared a bit.
It hadn’t surprised him at all that when Shimizu had come back with the first aid kit that Atsumu had insisted on taking over when he’d been the one to offer first. The two of them had continued to quietly compete over her attention as they fixed up her scratches, though he could at least feel his brother’s guilt for inflicting them on her in the first place, which did help sooth some of his annoyance with his older twin.
It was utterly gratifying that even when she had Atsumu literally in the palm of her hand, she’d still looked for him too. He’d tried to shove the feeling down and away, trying to remind himself that neither he nor his brother actually wanted another owner, but found it wasn’t working well. The combination of her scent and her fingers as she massaged her fingers through his hair enough to make him want to curl up in her lap and never leave.
He’d thought they might get in trouble when Sugawara returned. His fellow silver cat-hybrid belonged to the owner of the center, and took his job very seriously. He wouldn’t allow any of them to make trouble, and while he respected him, and admittedly envied him a bit for the clear trusting and loving relationship he had with his owner it didn’t stop him from wanting to claw his eyes out for bringing up their past in front of her.
Right when he was considering attempting to verbally eviscerate the other hybrid and damn the consequences his brother’s shock had pulled him from his thoughts, and he turned just in time to see her pull his twin into her lap. The feel of her hand gently squeezing his neck from behind practically made him limp with pleasure as Atsumu’s own bliss at being so close to her combined with his own to thoroughly distract the two of them, though not so much he didn’t notice her excusing their behavior and ensuring they didn’t get in trouble.
However, both of them had snapped to attention when the other hybrid had asked her if she wanted to adopt the two of them. He’d been able to feel his twin’s building hope, his impulsive brother apparently forgetting all about not wanting another owner, already clearly more than half in love with her despite not even knowing her for a day.
It was a trait he both hated and envied in his twin, the ability to be so impulsive, to move on so quickly and let go of past hurts. It wasn’t something he was capable of. He knew he was a grudge holder and far slower to trust than his brother was. He liked to think it served him well and kept him from being as naïve as Atsumu could be, though there were times it made things difficult too.
He’d been unsure whether he wanted her to state her intention to adopt them or not, right up until she’d said she hadn’t even considered it. It stung more than he’d expected, his own small hurt amplified by his brother’s though both of them had been somewhat soothed by her explanation that she wanted to know them better.
It was extremely reasonable and made him like her all the more, knowing she was the cautious type, more like him than like Atsumu, even if he simultaneously wished she’d been a little more impulsive just this one time and said yes instead. Though he found himself heartened by her honesty. That she’d actually asked them if they wanted to go with her rather than making any sort of assumption had settled things for him.
He hadn’t needed Atsumu’s silent pleading to forget their original plans to agree that maybe they should give this human a chance, though it did make it easier in the end to agree as he wasn’t the only one who wanted it.
They’d both tried to win her over, and though they’d accidentally fallen into squabbling more than once she’d handled it like a champ, not at all put off and even amused by it if the smile was any indication. However, despite the fact that they were the ones trying to win her over, it seemed every word she spoke was actually meant to win them over instead.
She was nothing like their previous owner, who’d been strict with his rules and harsh with his punishments. In fact she didn’t speak about punishments at all. He wasn’t naïve enough to think there wouldn’t be any if they misbehaved, but the freedoms she was offering in turn more than made up for anything she might throw their way.
The biggest hiccup had been when Atsumu mentioned their previous owner. The horror and guilt he’d felt from his twin was the only reason he’d managed to keep himself from doing more than hiss at him. His stomach had sunk when she’d gently pressed them for answers, but he knew they had to give her something.
He’d tried to give her as little as possible unwilling to volunteer the information, both because he hated even thinking about their time with their previous owner and because he was afraid she might somehow decide she didn’t want them because of it. In the end she’d changed the subject herself, and not brought it up again, but as she’d walked away from them with Sugawara, leaving them behind he’d wondered rather despairingly if that hadn’t been a mistake.
It didn’t matter that she’d turned around to comfort them when Atsumu had been unable to keep his heartbreak quiet. He’d known the minute she walked out the doors the chances of her coming back were slim to none. That was the other thing that remained consistent between this shelter and the last. Once a potential owner walked away claiming they needed to ‘think on it’ they never came back.
Still he hadn’t been able to turn away from her embrace, or to stop himself from scent marking the opposite side of your neck from the one his twin had claimed, laying his own personal stamp with the faint hope it would remind you to come back for them. However, no matter what you’d said, he couldn’t bring himself to hope. He knew hoping would only lead to more disappointment, and he wasn’t like Atsumu he wouldn’t be able to bounce back from it.
Not that his twin was making it easy on him. His brother’s hope was so fierce it was almost painful and he could feel the slightly desperate edge to it. He’d gotten attached to her, not that he could blame him, he was more attached than he wanted to be too. However unlike him, Atsumu had fill faith you were coming back, so much so he’d actually packed up his room into the bags they’d brought from his old place and was ready to go.
Nothing Osamu or any of the others, who also seemed to understand how small the chance was that she’d come back for them, said could sway him. The moment it had passed three o’clock Atsumu had brought hjs bags out to the shared living area and began to sit vigil, waiting for her to come back.
Stubborn as ever his twin had ignored all the pitying looks sent his way and the fact that slowly but surely time had slipped by, leaving just half an hour until they were supposed to close. Though his face was resolute, his brother wasn’t actually stupid and Osamu knew it was only stubborn pride keeping him in place. He could feel the slow onset of his twin’s hurt and despair as each minute ticked down.
He’d contemplated leaving him, going to his own room to wallow, but he knew he could never abandon his twin. They’d been through everything together, and he certainly wasn’t going to leave him now.
He was trying to figure out if he could coax his brother into leaving his post when the door swung open, revealing Sugawara, who had a wide beaming smile on his face. His fellow silver hybrid cast a quick glance behind him before ushering his follower into the room.
He barely caught a glimpse of her before his brother practically launched himself at her, but it was enough to freeze him in his place, because it was her. She’d actually come back after all.
His brother had wrapped himself around her, burying his face in her neck and clinging to her like favorite a stuffed toy, not that she seemed to mind, if the hands she was running over his hair and back meant anything. He couldn’t quite hear what they were saying, the words too quiet to hear over the sudden near painful hope and the rapid beat of his own heart at the thought that she’d come for them.
Atsumu’s joy was practically burning through him, combined with his restored faith and smug satisfaction that he’d been right all along about her coming back for them. It probably should’ve annoyed him, but he found that all he could really feel was a bone deep sort of relief.
“Where’s your brother?” she asked, as she finally managed to gently extract herself a bit from his twin’s embrace, though he noticed he didn’t let go entirely, one of his hands laced firmly with hers.
He immediately stood, letting himself fall back into his more human skin as he made his way toward them, not waiting for his brother to out him. She seemed to spot him immediately and the relieved smile on her face was enough to make his traitorous heart skip a beat.
“Osamu,” she greeted warmly, more warmly than he thought he’d ever been greeted by anyone before as she opened her free arm in an inviting gesture. It was maybe a little pathetic how readily he accepted that embrace, but he couldn’t bring himself to care, as he fell into her hold, face automatically nuzzling against the side of her neck that Atsumu had left unclaimed. A rumbling purr left his lips as he felt her press her face against his affectionately, as he allowed himself to cling to her for a bit.
“I’m so sorry I’m late,” she murmured to him quietly, her arm squeezing affectionately around his waist, genuine regret in her tone, “My boss made me stay a little longer than usual, and then there was an accident on the freeway. I called ahead though and Sugawara has almost all the paperwork done. I just need to collect the two of you, do some signing and we’ll go home okay?”
“Really? Yer takin’ us home?” he almost didn’t recognize his own voice given how weak it sounded, the quaver in it making him feel utterly ridiculous and overly emotional, something that was supposed to be his twin’s job, and frustrated him enough that he bit his lip nearly hard enough to bleed as he wrestled with himself, trying to get back in control of his emotions.
“Yeah, as long as you want to come, then I’ll gladly take you,” she offered with a gentle smile that made his heart squeeze nearly painfully in his chest, “Though there’s something I need to admit to first.”
He froze a little at that, staring at her anxiously as Atsumu also looked on, his blabbermouth brother finally silent and clearly wary. She carefully released him, though she still reached for his hand, peering between the two of them, anxious but also obviously determined. He allowed her to grasp her fingers, squeezing them automatically, anxiety making his heartrate skyrocket and bile rise in his throat.
“I asked the center about your previous owner,” she confessed, the words automatically making his heart drop, as he wondered numbly what they could’ve told her. Had she asked for the details? Was she afraid now? Had she changed her mind or decided to add some stipulations to their adoption?”
“I didn’t ask for details,” she clarified, her voice managing to cut through the haze of panic that had been rising in his chest, “All I asked was if they thought whatever had happened with your previous owner would cause trouble for me, or put any of us in any sort of danger.”
That didn’t actually sound so bad, and was even fairly reasonable the storm of hurt and anger that had been building behind his anxiety slowly dispersing the more he thought about it. He noticed that his grip on her hand had loosened a bit, and he retightened his hold, hoping the center had responded in a way that reassured her. Given that she was here, talking to them, he thought it wasn’t unreasonable to be hopeful.
“They said none of us would be in any danger, otherwise they never would’ve offered to take you both in, in the first place, and that they were sure you’d be alright with me,” she explained, her hand gently squeezing his in return.
He wasn’t sure if the bone deep relief he felt was his or his brother’s but he couldn’t bring himself to care, too caught up in the surging hope that followed it as she asked, “So, even knowing that I asked that, are the two of you still willing to come home with me?”
“O course we want to go with ya, right Samu?” his brother replied instantly, nuzzling into her neck insistently, clearly begging for attention, attention she seemed more than willing to give if the affectionate smile on her face was any indication. When she looked at him for confirmation all he could do was nod in agreement, unable to find the words for how very much he did want it and unwilling to sound ridiculous again.
The next half hour passed in a strange almost dream like haze, as he packed himself up, his smug brother clinging to her and gloating over how he was already finished, soaking up her attention as he made a mental note to get back at his annoying twin later. Once he finished packing all there really was, was a couple of signatures before he found himself in a nice car that was speeding along the highway.
Atsumu was chatting away in the front seat, practically bouncing as he asked their amused new owner anything that popped into his head as he tried to digest what had happened. Somehow, someway, they had an owner again.
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You smiled to yourself as you listened to Atsumu babble away happily in the seat next to you. The golden furred twin hadn’t stopped bouncing since you’d showed up at the shelter, clearly over the moon that you’d come back for him. Osamu was quiet in the back seat, and you might’ve been worried he was happy to come with you if not for the way he’d scent marked you, almost frantically his hand clutched tightly to yours as you’d signed the paperwork to take them home.
It was pretty clear both twins had thought you weren’t coming back for them, and it had broken your heart a bit, and made you even more resolute that you’d done the right thing for all of you. You’d been anxious the whole day to get back to them, not nearly as focused on work as you probably should’ve been, which had been part of the reason for your delay in the first place.
You’d panicked more than a bit when you’d encountered the accident on the way there, afraid that you’d break your promise to the twins. It had only been Sugawara’s kind voice, assuring you that he’d start the paperwork while you drove and even stay open late if necessary for you to get there, that had kept your guilt and panic at bay.
Now that you had them with you weren’t quite sure how you felt. Dazed that it was actually happening, excited for what the future might bring, and a little anxious about all the changes you’d have to make in your life even as you looked forward to those changes more than anything.
However, before you headed for home there were a couple things you needed to do first. Luckily you would hopefully find everything you needed in one place, at least for today. You wanted to give them time to settle in a bit, more shopping could come later when they’d decided what they needed.
“Where’s this?” Atsumu asked, pausing in his excited babble to look at you with confusion, as you pulled into the large parking lot, “Ya don’t live here do ya?”
“Don’t be stupid,” his brother huffed from the backseat, “Yer gonna make her think we’re some kind of bumpkins, ya know what a mall is Tsumu.”
“O course I know what a mall is,” Atsumu blustered, twisting around in his seat to glare at his twin, “I just thought maybe she had an apartment nearby is all. Who knows how rich people live?”
You huffed in amusement, reaching out without thought to ruffle his ears affectionately. The golden haired hybrid froze for a minute under your touch, and you wondered if you’d done something wrong, freezing as well, before a rumbling purr left his chest as he pressed his head further into your hand.
“You’re too cute,” you murmured almost to yourself as you gently scratched his ears and stroked your hand over his face and neck, unable to keep the smile from your lips.
“We’re only stopped here for a quick couple errands,” you explained to both twins, reluctantly pulling away from Atsumu who offered a pout but didn’t protest, “I noticed you don’t have as much as I thought you would, and I want to get you more comfortable collars to wear when we’re in public.”
Both twins hands immediately flew to the simple brown leather bands around their necks. All hybrids were required to wear collars in public to identify them as belonging to someone. The collars had a tag on them, which was essentially a small chip that had all their owner’s information in it, that when scanned would tell someone how to get in contact with their owner. It was to ensure they behaved and that if they didn’t their owner could be forced to take responsibility for their actions. Any hybrid who walked around without a collar immediately had the police called and was brought in and held until they could figure out why they were without.
You’d heard horror stories about the way such hybrids were treated, innocent hybrids who’d accidentally lost a collar somewhere and been so traumatized when they were finally returned to their owners that they were never the same again. Which of course was why you were determined it was never going to happen to your twins, even if a part of you balked at the idea of putting a symbol of ownership on another sentient being. Judging from the looks on their faces, Atsumu’s much easier to read than Osamu’s they’d heard stories too, and neither of them bothered to protest.
“Come on,” you urged gently, climbing out of the car yourself, “The sooner we get the unpleasant stuff done the sooner we get to the good stuff. I’ve got a couple things in mind I’d like to get you both as welcome home presents, but if there’s anything else you think you want or need feel free to ask.”
“Presents?” Atsumu asked eagerly, practically bounding out of the car.
“That’s right,” you agreed with a small laugh, watching him sulk a bit as he realized his brother had beaten him in securing your free hand, Osamu’s fingers laced with your own and a smug smirk on the silver hybrid’s face, “So keep close and let’s get going okay?”
Luckily the mall wasn’t too crowded, and while the twins got more then their fair share of admiring looks, doubtless both because of how good looking they were and how rare twin hybrids in general were, no one actually dared to approach your group, even as Atsumu practically bounced around glancing around the mall in fascination and reminding you more of an eager puppy than a supposedly slightly older cat hybrid.
Osamu was much more dignified and kept close to your side, though judging from his wide-eyed look that he couldn’t quite hide behind his stoic façade he was just as in awe as his brother. You were starting to get an impression of their previous owner and it was far from good.
You’d known that some owners kept their hybrids close to home, either because they were overly protective or possessive, and it had always rubbed you the wrong way. Ojirou had always allowed Kita and Suna to do as they pleased for the most part, treating them as capable adults and equals, more like roommates than the pets some treated their hybrids as and his was the example you were going to strive to follow.
It was why your errands today were so important, because while you would happily have let your twin hybrids run around as they pleased dressed however they pleased a collar was unfortunately the one thing they couldn’t be without, especially if they were going to go outside without you.
Luckily the mall was outfitted with several hybrid specialty stores and it didn’t take you long to find one dedicated entirely to collars. Both twins were a little wide eyed at the selection, and neither seemed to know quite what to say as you roamed through the aisles together looking at the selection.
Several of them made you grimace in outright distaste, the collars boasting accessories like inward facing spikes or tracking devices that would alert the owner if the hybrid tried to leave their home. It made you feel a little sick to your stomach, so you instead turned to the less intrusive ones.
“Do you see anything you like?” you asked the twins, squeezing Osamu’s hand affectionately, “You don’t have to wear collars in the house if you don’t want to, but you’re going to need them if you want to leave when I’m not home, which means you’ll probably be wearing them a lot, so make sure to pick something you like. You can even pick a couple if you want it to match your outfit for the day or whatever I don’t mind spending a little more to get a handful of chips programmed.”
Both twins blinked at you owlishly clearly startled by the offer, which made your heart hurt for them, even as they hesitantly turned back toward the displays, looking more closely than they had before.
“Do ya have any restrictions?” Osamu asked bluntly, not quite looking at you as he eyed a display of thick leather ones that didn’t look comfortable in the slightest.
“No,” you assured him, “I’m not the one who has to wear it.”
Osamu nodded slowly, and seemed to be taking his time as he perused the collars. You let him do as he liked, allowing him to lead. You’d only loosened your hold on him once, thinking he may like to wander the store like his brother and not have to tow you along with him, but the way his hand had reflexively tightened on yours in response had put paid to that assumption and you’d immediately re-laced your fingers together.
In the end Atsumu approached you first, holding a collar out to you hopefully. It actually looked like it was meant more for a dog hybrid, thick black leather with steel spikes on it, making it look fairly fierce. Personally you thought it was gaudy and was probably going to be uncomfortable, but you tried not to let your distaste show, after all you’d said anything they wanted and you’d meant it. Luckily in the end you didn’t need to say anything.
“What the hell is that?” Osamu demanded when he caught sight of the collar in his brother’s hands, the disgusted look on his face letting you know his feelings quite clearly.
“It’s a collar scrub, what else would it be?” Atsumu replied with a sneer for his twin you were beginning to think was automatic.
“I’m not the scrub you are,” the silver twin sneered, “Because only a scrub would wear somethin’ like that.”
“Oy,” Atsumu interjected, with a fierce glare, “She said we could have what we wanted.”
“Yeah but she probably thought ya had some sort of taste, she doesn’t know you well enough to know how scrubby ya are scrub,” Osamu hissed back.
“Alright guys,” you interjected gently, squeezing Osamu’s hand and reaching out to gently ruffle Atsumu’s ears, aware of the eyes of the cashier which had definitely turned in your direction given the twins were getting louder and louder by the second, “Let’s try to keep it to polite volume levels in public hmm?”
“Sorry,” both twins grumbled, identical pouts on their faces that made you giggle.
“It’s alright,” you assured them fondly, “Just try to be good okay?”
They nodded though Osamu clearly needed to get the last word in as he turned to you with pleading eyes, “Ya think it’s an abomination too don’t ya?”
“I said you could have whatever you wanted,” you told him diplomatically, “If this is what Atsumu likes, then of course he can have it.”
“Ha, see!” Osamu demanded of his twin, clearly seeing right through your attempt at diplomacy, “She thinks it’s ugly too!”
“Do ya really think it’s ugly?” Atsumu asked you sulkily eyeing the collar in his hands.
You’d known before that you were weak to pleading eyes, but it turned out you were even more weak to the pleading copper eyes of your hybrid, the thought that he might be sad tugging at your heartstrings.
“I just worry you’ll be uncomfortable,” you assured him, letting go of Osamu’s hand and gently cupping his face in your hands, rubbing your thumbs along his cheeks affectionately, the same way you did for one of the hybrids that occasionally came to your office to sulk when his owner brought him to work but didn’t pay attention to him.
Atsumu immediately leaned into your palms, heavy lidded eyes half-shut with bliss as you explained, “It’s summer right now, and there’s no padding so it will be hot, heavy and probably chafe. Plus didn’t you say you wanted to play volleyball? Won’t it get in the way? I can definitely get it for you if you like it, but maybe pick something else too, okay?”
“Kay,” your golden twin agreed, sounding completely and utterly content as he nuzzled into your hands, making your heart melt in your chest.
“What about this one?” Osamu offered, pulling your attention away from his brother.
He was holding a collar in his hands, one that actually looked more like a necklace a thin but sturdy looking cord of leather fastened with a silver chain in the front that clasped on both ends to a silver hoop that suspended a solid silver disc in the middle that on close inspection revealed that it housed the chip needed for identification.
“That looks really nice,” you praised, letting out a breath of relief at his choice. You weren’t a big fan of the collars in general, but seeing it look more like a necklace made it seem far more tolerable. Plus it was black and silver and thus would probably go with just about anything he chose to wear.
Letting go of Atsumu to take the collar from his twin, you completely missed the smug smirk directed over your shoulder by Osamu as you inspected it, though Atsumu certainly didn’t, giving his twin an annoyed glare above your head.
In the end, while Atsumu sulked and complained about it, he did actually put the original collar he’d offered back and go with Osamu’s choice, even though you offered to get him both. He refused, sulking slightly all the while, but remained insistent that he only needed the one, even though you ended up buying four collars total, so you could have two back-ups. Though he did insist on holding your hand to make up for the disappointment.
Luckily the manager didn’t seem to mind having to program all four collars, tapping away at the computer, while Atsumu sulked a bit by your side and Osamu somehow managed to all but radiate smug superiority. The cashier carefully ringing up your purchases for you as you pulled your wallet out.
“A word of advice?” the cashier offered as you waited for the programmed collars, surprising you with his forwardness.
“You’re too indulgent with them,” he continued on, not giving you the chance to refute the need for him to speak, “Hybrid’s need a firm hand. You’ll spoil them if you let them get away with raising their voices in public and causing a scene. Don’t ever let them forget their place.”
You felt more than saw both twins bristle on either side of you, and gently squeezed Atsumu’s hand, before laying your hand over the back of Osamu’s neck. You wouldn’t care a bit if they wanted to verbally eviscerate the man who was eying them with clear distaste, a distaste you were almost sure stemmed from jealousy given the lascivious looks he probably thought you hadn’t noticed levelled in your direction. Unfortunately, you also didn’t want them to get into trouble, and weren’t quite sure what the law said about how hybrids were allowed to defend themselves from humans, something you planned to rectify as soon as possible.
For now however you weren’t about to let the twins get in trouble and cut in your tone as cold as you could make it, “I don’t remember asking for your opinion, nor do I care about what you think in the least. I’ll treat them how I want to treat them, which means I’ll spoil and pamper them as much as I like. I suggest you keep your opinions to yourself in the future if you want to keep this business running. As it is I’ll be sending my complaint to your superiors. Let’s go guys, we can find other collars elsewhere. It’s not like they’re hard to find.”
“Wait! The chips are already programmed and you haven’t paid,” the manager protested, standing up from the computer looking utterly appalled.
“Should’ve thought of that before your employee opened his mouth, and decided to spew his unwanted bile everywhere,” you countered with a shrug, “I’d consider finding better employees in the future if I were you, or at least teach them to keep their mouths shut.”
“But the chips can’t be removed from these collars, they’ll be completely ruined,” the manager put in, sounding more than a bit despairing.
“I’m sorry,” you told her, feeling genuinely bad for the woman, after all it wasn’t her fault the other employee was an ass, “But that’s not my problem. I refuse to support any sort of business that would treat its customers like this.”
The glare she leveled on her fellow employee was utterly ferocious and had him cowering back in his seat. Not that you could blame her for being upset, each collar was about three hundred USD so the sale they were losing out on was enormous.
“I can offer you a discount?” she tried hopefully, “Fifty percent off?”
You tilted your head thoughtfully, but didn’t reply instead turning to look at the twins who’d clearly been more than ready to follow you out of the store, “What do you think?”
“Us?” Atsumu asked, clearly baffled.
“Yes, you,” you told him with a fond smile, “You’re the ones who got insulted, not me, and they’re your collars. I’m happy to buy you whatever you like from wherever you want it, whether that’s here or somewhere else.”
“Seventy-five percent off,” Osamu bargained from her other side, taking you by surprise. You turned to see him watching the manager with shrewd eyes, and when it looked like she would protest he added in, “Seventy-five percent off and we won’t leave bad reviews on every site we can or send letters of complaint to upper management.”
“Agreed,” the manager huffed, shooting another vicious look at her employee, one that clearly read that it would be coming out of his salary.
You huffed, amused at Osamu’s bargaining, gently massaging your thumb against the base of his neck affectionately before releasing both twins and moving to pay, only spending a quarter of what you’d originally planned.
“Nice work,” you praised the silver hybrid once the three of you were out of the store and out of earshot.
Osamu shot you a sly smirk, looking exceedingly pleased with himself as he walked beside you. Atsumu had claimed your hand this time, so he was carrying the bags, though it didn’t seem to bother him in the least.
“Now that, that’s taken care of, let’s go grab your gifts,” you told the twins, tugging them along to the PineApple store.
“Presents?” Atsumu asked eagerly, practically bounding along beside you, your intertwined hands swinging back and forth between you.
Laughing you simply pulled him with you into the store. Both twins were wide-eyed as you browsed through, clearly unused to the cutting edge technology on display, both of them exceedingly cautious with the expensive looking tech. It took some gentle urging, but eventually you managed to get phones and laptops picked out for each of them.
“Isn’t this too much,” Osamu asked you in an undertone, clearly worried as an employee walked Atsumu through getting his laptop set up. It turned out that of the twins Osamu was definitely more technically savvy and loved his new laptop, though Atsumu had already managed to download several apps and games on to his phone and was thoroughly enjoying them as well, “It’s expensive.”
“I have the money,” you assured him gently, “And besides, everyone has a phone these days. I want you guys to have them in case you get in trouble when I’m not home and need to reach me, like if you got lost or hurt or simply need a human to ensure you’re treated fairly. I’d feel awful if you needed me and I didn’t know.”
“The laptops are so you don’t get too bored at home, though I hope you’ll find things to enjoy outside the apartment too,” you continued, absently stroking your hand up and down his back.
“Will you be wanting hybrid trackers in the new phones?” the employee asked, her voice professional as she began to ring up your purchases.
You hesitated. On one hand you hated the idea of invading the twins privacy, and on the other you knew that you fully intended to let them roam as they pleased so wouldn’t it be better to have the tracker just in case? A quick glance showed that Osamu was impassive as ever, and even Atsumu just looked bored, not paying any attention whatsoever, instead tapping away at his new phone.
“What do you think?” you asked them, more than willing to hear their opinions on the matter.
“You’re the owner,” Osamu told her, apparently speaking for both of them as he gave an unconcerned shrug, which wasn’t helpful in the least.
You grimaced a bit trying to think of a compromise before finally pulling out your own phone and asking the employee, “Is there anyway to ensure all three of the phones will track each other?”
“Let me go ask,” she told you politely, turning away to go grab someone more knowledgeable.
“That’s fair right?” you asked hesitantly, “This way you know where I am too and can come find me if you need me.”
“Yeah,” Osamu agreed, giving you a look that you thought might be something as close to awe as you’d seen on the silver haired hybrid, “Yeah that’s fair.”
The employee quickly returned and confirmed they could indeed make all three phones track one another, and in the span of a few minutes managed to get your purchases complete. Feeling like that was probably enough for now, you led them back towards the car.
It was starting to get pretty late, and the minute you’d exited the mall Osamu’s stomach had given a loud rumbling growl. Atsumu had made fun of him for all of a minute, before his own stomach betrayed him. You’d shaken your head at their antics, but allowed a surprisingly eager Osamu to order whatever he wanted for carryout from the Chinese place near your apartment.
One quick stop for the food, and you finally managed to bring your new hybrids home. Both of them were a little quiet as you led them up to your apartment, staring around and clearly taking everything in. Either Ojirou, Kita and Suna weren’t home, or they’d decided to give you time to settle with the twins as they didn’t emerge from their apartment as you arrived in the hallway and fumbled the door open.
“Here we are,” you told them, hitting the lights, “Home sweet home.”
Both twins were laden with things, carrying their purchases, the food, and their things from the adoption center. Still looking at them was enough to make your heart clench. It had only taken one trip to bring everything up, but despite hybrids being stronger than normal humans it still made your heart clench to see how very little the twins actually had. Each of them only had a medium sized suitcase of things, and Atsumu had a worn volleyball but that was it aside from the things you’d bought them. It was something you were determined to fix for the future, but for now you’d make do.
“I know you’re hungry, so unless you want to settle in for a bit first we can eat and then I’ll show you around,” you offered.
The twins exchanged looks, but nodded in clear agreement. You pointed out the bathroom just in case, but then brought them to the kitchen, trying to show them where everything was as you pulled utensils from the drawers. Osamu clearly paid much more attention to her explanations than Atsumu did, though both diligently helped her set the table.
The food was really good, and thankfully sparked more conversation, even if it was more subdued than earlier, all of them worn out from the long day they’d had. Osamu was clearly very interested in food, and not just in eating it the way his brother was. You managed to coax out that he’d cooked for their previous owner from time to time, and told him that as long as he was careful he was more than free to use her kitchen and anything in it for whatever he wanted earning what felt like her first real smile from the silver haired twin.
Despite how tired they clearly were, both twins helped you clean up. For the first time since you’d first discovered the lovely little Chinese restaurant there weren’t actually any leftovers, the twins having consumed everything you said you didn’t want. As they worked you noted it really was kind of nice, even if things were quiet, to have the company as they went about their tasks.
“Alright, so I wasn’t sure if you’d want your own rooms or if you’d want to share,” you told them, gesturing for them to follow, “We’re going to have to do some shopping either way, since they’re your rooms and I want you to be able to personalize them any way you want, but I think they’re pretty equal in size.”
The twins stared at you, clearly surprised, glancing at each other, to the rooms you’d offered, to you, and back again, the gesture making her more than a bit nervous. You’d thought there was plenty of space for the two of them, but maybe they didn’t see it that way?
“We get our own rooms?” Atsumu asked at last, finally breaking the silence, his voice quiet and disbelieving, copper eyes huge in his face.
“If you want them, then of course they’re yours,” you assured him, concerned, “I still have to clean out my study, but I didn’t want to delay adopting you and I don’t think it will take too long. There’s a pull out futon in there, though you’re more than free to share if you want a bed, or I can take the futon and one of you can have my bed for now. I’ve certainly slept on the futon before and I don’t mind.”
“You’d give up your bed?” Osamu repeated, looking like you’d just smacked him over the head with a fish, more surprise on his face then you’d thought him capable of showing.
“Just until we find something for you,” you told him, a little puzzled at his surprise but with the sinking feeling that your suspicions about their former owner were correct.
“But, why?” Atsumu asked you, wide eyed and a little teary.
“Because, you’re mine now,” you assured him, unable to quite find the words you wanted to say, but hoping you were conveying your feelings at the very least, “And I’m going to do everything I can to keep you safe and happy.”
The sad mewling sound he made in response to your words was enough to break your heart, as he pitched forward squeezing you into his chest and burying his face in your shoulder. You pressed your cheek to his hair, rubbing his back soothingly with one arm even as you automatically opened the other one for his twin, a gesture that was slowly becoming more and more familiar to you.
Osamu didn’t sob the way his twin did, but the way he squeezed you tight let you know he was just as moved as Atsumu even if he was quieter about it. Seeing their genuine gratitude for what you felt was common courtesy broke your heart, but even as it ached and you did your best to soothe them you swore to yourself, to love and care for your new hybrids so they’d never want for anything ever again to be the best owner it was possible to be after all they deserved nothing less.
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178 notes · View notes
astaroth1357 · 4 years
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Hi there, congrats for the 1500 subs. How about the bros reaction to an MC who's an empath?
Brothers with an MC Who is an Empath
This should not have been as hard as it was but maaan, my brain just wasn’t working. Finally got it done though!
Intro:
An Empath is essentially someone who is highly sensitive to outside stimuli like sounds, personalities, energies, emotions, or just hectic/chaotic environments. They tend to absorb the emotions of others into themselves because of this. Though their sensitivity can grant deeper understanding for others, it comes at the price of the Empath’s own emotional and physical health if not given enough time to decompress which can lead to feeling drained, irritable, depressed, or overwhelmed.
Lucifer
Oh boy, if there was ever any demon not in tune to his own emotions…
He started out legitimately not knowing what an "empath" was and frankly he didn't care to know. His main concern was just keeping the MC alive.
Though that didn't seem to be too hard because they apparently get tired quickly… or at least they had to take extended periods away from most of his brothers.
He wasn't sure why, he first assumed it was because they found his brothers annoying but that didn't seem to be the case either...
He'd see them grinning with Mammon after a jackpot, relaxing with Satan in silence, and even crying with Levi over things so niche and pointless he couldn’t imagine that they actually cared...
It wasn’t too long until they set their sights on him. 
They always seemed to know when he was stressed or when he needed to talk to someone. He'd even be embarrassed to admit there were days when he’d just hover somewhat close to them, face more or less slathered with "I really need to talk right now" but too proud to make the first move.
After some time, he decided to look up what an empath was again and it all clicked into place. They probably knew when he was tired because they could just sense it off of him.
And who knows how exhausting that must be for them...
After that little revelation he actually started paying more attention to his own health to keep it from spilling over to them, but he would still go to them to talk from time to time. He honestly never expected a human to become his closest confidant.
Mammon
Mammon has BIG energy. He’s one of those personalities that just brightens a room he walks in but damn… if he’s not a little exhausting to be around sometimes…
Truthfully, he was kind of into their whole “I know how you feel so you don’t have to say it” vibe though it was really confusing to start with...
On the one hand, they never made fun of him for his sensitive side. Not once. And they seemed pick up on the days where he wasn't feeling his best as well, which only made him happy and want spend more time with them.
But on the other hand, he'd be lying if he said that their need to recharge away from him didn't catch him off guard a lot... Hell, for the first few weeks of getting to know the MC he thought they didn't like him at all!
It took the MC sitting him down and explaining to him that they're more sensitive to things like lights, sounds, and emotions for him to kind of get the picture. It wasn’t that they didn’t like him, they just needed to be somewhere calm.
Cue a lot of “Okay human, I’ll be calm. Promise! Ya won’t even now I’m here!” in a well meaning, but pretty loud voice and not getting much better from there, bless his heart...
Even after he eventually gets the picture and stops hanging off of their leg, it does bum him out to be separated for however long it takes for them to get better (at worst, it can be days).
But he really gets excited like a puppy whenever they finally come back again! Big grins and lots of hugs (good luck peeling him off now).
Levi
Levi is... best taken in short bursts.
Though his personality isn’t big like Mammon’s, he does have a lot of lingering negativity around him. Not exactly his fault, being Envy and all, but not great for someone who’s sensitive to emotions.
In truth, Levi genuinely loves being around the MC because they “get” him even if they don’t get what’s happening.
While his brothers may roll their eyes or struggle to understand how he can put so much emotional investment into an anime or a character, the MC would always seem to feel and respect that his emotions were genuine and let him experience them without question.
… But at the same time, that sensitivity meant that they got carried in with him through his every emotion, good, bad, or somewhat erratic depending on the situation… 
Add to that his higher than usual need for validation, investment, and feedback due to his insecurity and unfortunately he’s easily the most emotionally draining person in the House...
It took some time to explain to Levi what an empath was and that their desired space wasn’t because there was something wrong with him or anything, they just needed breaks. Thankfully, being an introvert himself meant that Levi understood this a lot quicker than Mammon.
In truth, being with Levi could be fun and rewarding for both parties. During his high points, his happiness truly does shine like no other, just… don’t overdo it.
Satan
In the beginning, Satan was honestly pretty impressed how quickly the exchange student saw through his fake smiles. They’d know that there was no actual joy behind them and thus avoided him for the most part.
This was before they formed their pact so he was perfectly fine with that. Let them hide, that’s the smart idea.
But after getting to know them and going through the body-switch, he started to see that it was deeper than just some good intuition on their part. Something about them… reflected the people around them...
They appeared to be acutely aware of the emotion in a given person or a given room and reacted like they were soaking in the atmosphere they found themselves in. Taking it into themselves…
It truly confused him.
Satan is the picture of emotional control, it’s been taught to him again and again to always keep a good handle on himself because things go flying when he doesn’t. The idea of being so open to others just didn’t make much sense to him… 
Why would anyone want to live so dependent on the emotions of others? It sounded chaotic just to hear about it...
But after he opened up to them about his own inner doubts he started to think it wasn’t such a bad thing. They appeared to be equipped to help him navigate his own emotions, especially the new ones he didn’t have the best grasp on yet.
He later did his own research into human emotions, discovered empaths, and that put it all into perspective. Like Lucifer, he did his best not to overwhelm them after that but there was little worry about that anyway. Satan is, again, emotional control at its finest.
Asmodeus
Oh, Asmo picked up on their human’s little quirk relatively quickly compared to his brothers. Being emotionally observant is just part of what makes him so good at what he does.
Honestly, he enjoyed just watching them from afar… Watching the way their eyes lit up when talking to a cheerful Simeon or how huffy and frustrated they’d get along with Mammon when things weren’t going his way. It was cute to him, like a child playing “Pretend.”
Eventually, though, he started to notice that it went a lot deeper than mere imitation...
One day, Levi came home distraught about the tragic death of some voice actor he fancied and the MC was right along with him, crying as if that loss was theirs...
On another, Satan had spent the whole day silently fuming and the MC was a complete wreck, tense and on-edge for no other reason than the feeling of aggression in the air…
And crowds… crowded rooms seemed to be the death of them. So much noise and constant input, they’d have to leave so quickly…
Asmo saw all these things himself, without having to be told, and he became a refuge for them when things became too much. He has a big personality himself, but he could tone it down for a time and offer them a place away for a while.
If school, parties, or the brothers themselves just became too much, the MC could always go to Asmo’s room to vent like they let everybody else to with them. He’d keep the place quiet and calm and just help them sort things out...
Thank their father for Asmo’s observance.
Beelzebub
Legit the calmest, sweetest, nicest person to be around. Truly the best companion for an empathic MC to have.
Beel’s personality is positive, sweet, and (most importantly) stable. He’s not too bombastic nor too withdrawn, he’s not riddled with hidden stress or self-loathing, and he’s not even manipulative in any way, he’s just… Beel.
Am I saying that Beel is the MC’s emotional support demon? Yes. Yes I am.
Being around Beel is like hooking them up to a walking battery recharging station. Something about him just exudes warmth and comfort… They could be wrapped up in his arms for days and never say a word yet still be perfectly content...
Beel doesn't really mind them coming to him when distressed either because he likes being able to help them when they’re feeling drained. It makes him feel kind of special, they don’t seem to go to anyone else in quite the same way.
Usually, one of his brothers will be in a bad mood and the human will flock to Beel like a protective barrier. They'll hug him or trail along behind him like a lost puppy, which he thinks is very cute.
If they’re feeling really out of it, he’d carry them around on his back while they rest like he does for Belphie sometimes. Any time his brothers try to get too close to them or look like they’re going to bother them, he’ll just carry them away to some place quieter.
Though, the MC did pick up the deep sadness he felt for Lilith and Belphie (while he was gone) from time to time.... Which, considering how kind and comforting he usually is, just makes that dip in mood all the more painful and distressing for them. Poor baby… 
Belphegor
Belphie is another calm personality to have around, kind of similar to Beel, but since he's more prone to sadness and irritability he doesn't make the best companion…
If Beel is comfort, then Belphie is repose. Relaxed and peaceful, but also languid and sluggish… When Beel isn't around, then he makes a decent second, but only on good days.
Belphie has a mixed opinion on their uncanny ability to pick up on his feelings… He tries his best to be “mysterious” so having someone who can read him like a book gets under his skin just a little…
But he also really likes how much it helps them get to know him and understand where he’s coming from (being the youngest, he isn’t as used to being heard by anybody other than Beel). So, he’s very conflicted…
It didn’t help at all when it came to light that the MC could legitimately tell that he felt very hostile and angry towards them while he was still in the attic. When he asked why they helped him anyway, they told him so that they could make Beel happy again, regardless of how he felt about them which... ouch...
As if he could feel any worse about that particular incident… They could feel how guilty he was about that… right?
Even if they can’t he makes sure that they know that he’s sorry and he won’t do it again. Probably the lil’shit.
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New World Order - TFATWS Rewrite Chapter One (Bucky Barnes x Reader)
[Marvel-Masterlist], [TFATWS Rewrite-Masterlist]
Next Chapter
Summary: You were an Avenger. That was how the world viewed you. Nobody else knew about your past & it was for the better. After all, you had Sam. You had Bucky. That had to be enough. At least for now.
Words: 6,214
Warnings: language, sarcasm, expect some sort of slow burn, there are hints already, this is a Bucky fic, which means that it'll focus on his scenes more, spoilers for TFATWS, (Y/E/C) = your eye color
If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤
You were no superhero. At least, you would never say you were one. Your past was filled with actions you regretted. None of it was your fault. It was not your decision to be the child of the leader of a HYDRA base. It was not your decision to grow up like a warrior. Fighting. Killing.
Your father was the bad guy. You knew that now. As a child, you did not see through his facade. How could you? He was your dad. Someone who was supposed to love you endlessly. Those years had shaped you. Into the person you were today.
Deep down, you wished there was a way to make you forget. Forget about your past. Forget about the pain. Forget about it all. Hell, you were a laboratory experiment. Those powers did not come from nowhere. No. They came from tons of needles, pumping a toxic serum into you veins. You should not even be alive anymore. Not by what now flowed through your body. Apparently, it was for your own good. That was how your dad put it. Absolute bullshit. Growing up isolated from the world, being trained to fight, to kill, daily. Your own good my ass. If it did one thing, then it ruined your damn life.
But at least you had powers, right? Blue flames you could control. Those blue flames that were hotter than anything else in this world. It took an awful lot of time to fully have control. Truthfully, you hated that part of you with every fiber of your being. It had been the cause of one too many deaths. You had been the cause. But weakness was not in your nature. If you did not show strength you would be a disappointment. Something you really did not want to be.
Bucky was the reason you got out of this life. He was the one to rescue you out of this hell hole. He was the one to show you an entirely different part of this world. And for that, you could never thank him enough. If it were not for Bucky, you would have gone insane ages ago. Who knew if you were still here today?
The Avengers were aware of your past. Of you being a part of HYDRA back in the days. Yet, you had never elaborated this any further. If there was one thing you were good at, it was keeping things to yourself. No need to burden others with your struggles. And you did struggle. Every single day. Because your mind was filled with memories. Memories you had tried to burn. Memories you wanted to erase. Memories of you being the bad guy. Just like your dad had been.
Your life changed when you were introduced to the Avengers. They did not trust you. Not right away. But during the fight with Thanos, the one after the Blip, you proved yourself to be worthy of their trust. Especially Steve. He had been there for you. When everyone else failed to believe in you. He was gone now. And it hurt like hell. Giving up was never an option. And the universe did not plan on giving you a break anytime soon. For now, you had to bury your feelings as deep as possible. Your focus should solely be on the new threats of this world. Threats, that seemed to increase daily.
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“Bucky is an asshole.” you were on the phone with Sam & the fact that the super soldier had been ignoring him for a while did not leave a good feeling inside his chest.
“What a revelation.” sarcastic comments were part of your life. It was your way of coping with everything. Frankly, it worked. More or less. “Give him some time.”
“More time? No.” sighing loudly. “I have other things to focus on.” he was referring to the mission he was about to perform.
“You sure you’ll be fine on your own?” it was not like you did not believe in his abilities. Just, life had not been the same ever since billions of people came back.
“When have I ever not been?” you could think of a few times but Sam ended the call before you even had the chance to answer. Typical.
Luckily, Sam usually told you about his missions. And you were proud of him. You really were. The situation you found yourself in? With Bucky & him? Well, it was everything but good. Bucky called you. You called Sam. Sam called you. You called Bucky. A circle you kept alive. And it sucked to be their only way of communication. For now, though, both of them were too stubborn to change anything about it.
“Enjoying the Tunisian sun I hope?” whenever Sam went on a mission, you had him call you after it. Simply because he knew you worried.
“You know it.” in the far background you could hear him working on something.
“Is everyone alright? That trainee of yours? What’s his name again?”
“Torres.” he sighed, frustrated by your question. You had asked him about a million times & apparently, you still had no clue. Truth was, you just liked messing with him. “Redwing is hurt.”
“Naaaw, poor baby.” giggling slightly. That man cared more for a piece of tech than he should.
“Shut up.” okay, better not mess with Wilson if it came to Redwing. Got it.
“When are you coming back?” your voice turned serious again. Having him gone for so long did not stick right with you. Obviously, you knew he was doing it for the greater good. But still. “I swear to all the Gods, if you say when we’re done here…” mumbling quietly but loud enough for him to hear.
“When we’re finished here.” a chuckle could be heard from his side. By the way it sounded, you assumed Torres was laughing as well. Rolling your eyes at his antics. He could be such a child sometimes.
“Oh, fuck off, Wilson.”
“Hey, language!” Sam had fun. Yeah, you were the one cracking jokes all of the time but he could deliver, too.
“Okay, you know what? Bye. Text me when you’re back.” now, it was you who did not give him enough time to respond. After all, he would have clapped back with another snarky remark & you were not in the mood for it. At all.
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“Steve represented the best in all of us. Courageous, righteous, hopeful. And he mastered posing stoically.” everyone chuckled at Sam’s description. Of him. Steve. Rhodey was standing right next to you. In that suit of his. The one that made him look way more approachable than you. No need for people to approach you. They did not know who you were before. And they sure as hell did not need to. It would turn things complicated. Humans did not like complicated. You did not like it. “The world has been forever changed. A few months ago, billions of people reappeared after five years away, sending the world into turmoil. We need new heroes. Ones suited for the times we’re in. Symbols are nothing without the women & men that give them meaning. And this thing…” he paused briefly, let out a short chuckle. The shield. “I don’t know if there’s ever been a greater symbol. But it’s more about the man who propped it up, & he’s gone. So, today we honor Steve’s legacy. But also, we look to the future. So, thank you, Captain America. But this belongs to you.” the crowd erupted into cheers. Applause was filling the room & you felt out of place. What was he doing? When Sam asked you to join him here today, he left out the fact that he wanted to give away the shield. The shield Steve had trusted him enough to own. And the people surrounding you? They…celebrated him for it? This entire speech was proof enough that Wilson was worthy of this job. So why the hell did he make that decision? Watching the shield being put into the showcase, you could hardly hold in the tears that formed at the corners of your (Y/E/C) eyes. Rhodey nudged you, sensing that something was wrong. Head hanging low, you ignored him, walking out of the room as fast as possible. If you stayed here any longer, Sam would have bruises for sure. Bruises caused by you. You would not risk that. Though, he kind of deserved it.
“Where’s (Y/N)?” Sam asked Rhodey when he finished with the press. You had told him you would wait here for him. There was no sign of you.
“Left a while ago.”
“What do you mean “Left a while ago.”? Did she say where she was heading?” why did you decide to leave? Had anything happened while he held his speech? All Rhodey could do was shrug. An explanation was not given by you. And he knew better than to ask.
“Take a walk?” Rhodey suggested, completely unaware to your weird behavior. The two of you were not that close. So he did not know you like Sam did. You were an adult, after all. If you wanted to go somewhere without asking someone first, then you were allowed to do that.
Disappointment was flooding through your body. Friends told each other stuff like that, right? So why did he keep it a secret that he planned on giving away the shield. With that action, he broke Steve’s trust & you were livid. If only Steve were here right now. You missed him. So much. Next time Sam met you, you could not promise anything. Because anger was all you felt. Anger & disappointment. Grief. But that one you could keep to yourself. At least for the time being. Shit. Bucky. One hundred percent did he watch Sam giving away the shield. Oh, he would be filled with hatred. Compared to that, you were only a small threat. Bucky was the one Wilson should keep an eye on. Well, he had been trying to get a hold of him. So far, without luck.
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A gunshot blasting woke Bucky up from another night invaded by nightmares. His changed hair did not put his demons at bay. His look was different but there were some things he could never get rid of. His past. The past he dreaded as much as you did. Probably what you two had in common. Being part of HYDRA & all. His breathing was irregular & there was no way in hell he could go back to sleep. It was in the middle of the night & he hated himself for relying on someone else. But he would go insane if he did not call another person right now. If he did not call you. The only one who seemed to understand what he was going through. The only one who never judged him because of his nightmares. The only one who made him feel like he was a good person. Not the killer he once had been. When HYDRA controlled him. Back, when he was called “The Winter Soldier”. Would he ever move on from that? Grabbing his old phone, he did not overthink too long & dialed your number. One, he knew by heart. Because he had called you so many times. It stuck in his head.
“Buck? Is everything alright?” concern was present in your voice. Usually, when you got a call in the middle of the night, it was him. And you were fine with it. If he trusted you enough to help him with his demons, than you were more than happy to come to his aid. No matter the time.
“I-I…it’s just, ugh, I-“ still shaken up from his nightmare, you did not need him to finish his sentence. You had been in this exact situation so many times. You knew what he needed. Your presence. Your voice. Your comfort. You.
“I’ll be there in a few.” assuring him, you were already grabbing the stuff you needed & walked out of your apartment. Only one destination in mind. Him. “Do you need me to stay on the phone?” it was a simple question. A stupid one, too. Usually, he would not say a word until you were with him. But it felt right to ask him what he wanted you to do. Needed you to do. When he did not answer for a few moments, you guessed he only nodded, not realizing that you could not see his motions. Yet, he did not hang up. Neither did you. Your breathing was enough for him. At least until you were in his apartment.
Knocking softly, as to not wake his neighbors, the door opened almost immediately after. Squeaking ever so slightly. Taking in his appearance, you could tell that it had been a bad nightmare. No, not a nightmare. A memory. You knew that because it was the reason you woke up most nights as well. If it were not for him feeling miserable, you would have drooled by the sight of him. No shirt. Hair sticking around so beautifully. Eyes you could lose yourself in. But it was not the right timing. Besides, Bucky & you were just friends. That was it. Just friends. Though, you would lie if you said that you did not feel butterflies whenever he shot you one of his charming smiles. Whenever his body brushed against yours on accident. Yes, he did have that effect on you. Hell, that was not what he needed right now. Your feelings could be dealt with later on. Bucky was all who mattered now. There was no conversation. No words exchanged. It was enough for him if you were with him. A sign that he was not alone. That he still had you. Even after everything. Even after calling you, night after night, disturbing your own rest. Not that you got much to begin with but he did not need to know that. It had always been a mystery to him. Why you stuck around still. Though you had assured him thousands of times that you were in this for good. If he needed you, you were only one call away. And he appreciated you for it. More than he would ever like to admit. Friends. You were friends.
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“So, Mr. Barnes, are you still having nightmares?” another session with Dr. Raynor. Another dreaded session. It was stupid to Bucky. But there was no way out of this. He had to. Seconds of silence went by before she spoke up again. “James, I asked you a question. Are you still having nightmares?” what kind of question was that? A stupid one. That was for sure.
“No.” simple, short. Sufficient. Not for his doctor, though.
“We’ve been doing this long enough that I can tell when you’re lying. Well, you seem a little off today. Did something happen recently?”
“No.” what an answer to move this session forward. Clearly, he was not in the mood to talk today. Not even you were able to get his mind off of things. Though, you definitely made his night easier.
“You’re a civilian now. With your history, the government needs to know that you’re not gonna…” her hand motioned stabbing. Awful action but who were you to judge? Bucky nodded with that look on his face that showed how completely done he was with this situation. Yet, she kept going. “It’s a condition of your pardon. So, tell me about your most recent nightmare.”
“I didn’t have a nightmare.” well, it was worth a try. After taking a deep breath, she grabbed the pencil, ready to start writing into that notebook of hers again. “Oh, come on. Really? You’re gonna do the notebook thing? Why? It’s passive aggressive.” looked like the two of them were going back to the roots.
“You don’t talk. I write.” Bucky sighed at that. He knew he would not get out of this.
“Okay. Okay. I crossed a name off the list of my amends yesterday. Don’t worry. I used all your three rules. Senator Atwood. She was a HYDRA pawn for years. Helped her get into office when I was the Winter Soldier. And after HYDRA disbanded, she continued to abuse the power I gave her.”
“So, rule number one, you can’t do anything illegal.”
“All I did was give some intel to the aide to convict her. And I wasn’t involved in anything else.”
“Rule number two?”
“What was rule number two?” his gaze drifting off, showing he thought about it deeply. How ironic.
“Nobody gets hurt. It’s a big one.”
“Then why isn’t it rule number one?” he did have a point there. No room left for arguing about that. “I didn’t hurt anybody. I promise.”
“And what about rule number three?” Bucky’s mouth opened, yet, nothing came out. “The whole point of making amends is to fulfil rule number three.”
“You know, you’re a cynic, Doc. Of course, I completed rule number three. I am James Bucky Barnes & you’re part of my efforts to make amends.” words followed by that smile of his. That smile everyone could tell was fake. Almost creepy. But efforts, right? It was all about the efforts.
“So, you did it all right, but it didn’t help with the nightmares.”
“Well, like I said, I didn’t have any.” Bucky Barnes, everyone. Still trying to fool his doctor.
“Look, one day, you’re gonna have to open up & understand that some people really do want to help you & that they can be trusted. People like (Y/N).” the mention of your name made his eyes snap up.
“I trust more people than her.” it sounded more like he tried to convince himself more than anyone else.
“Yeah? Give me your phone.” an order. Grabbing it out of his pocket to hand it over. A short look was enough. “You don’t have ten phone numbers on this thing. Oh, & you’ve been ignoring the texts from Sam. Look, you gotta nurture friendships. I am the only person you have called all week. That is so sad…Oh, that’s not right. You called (Y/N) last night. Anything you wanna tell me about that?” closing the flip phone, she threw it over to Bucky which he caught with ease.
“What? Do I need to justify calling a friend?” chuckling & shaking his head slightly, he brushed his hands over his thighs.
“If you call that friend at 3 am, then yes. Because you should sleep at that time. Except if you had a nightmare which you claimed that you didn’t.”
“We just talked. That’s all.” he thought that brushing it off as if it were nothing was enough to get her to shut up. Hell, he had brought you up during his sessions way too many times. After all, he still wanted the situation between you guys to be subtle.
“You’re alone.”
“A minute ago, you said I had (Y/N).” he tried arguing but his attempts failed.
“You’re a hundred years old. You have no history, no family…” right, pouring salt in the wounds. That usually worked.
“Are you lashing out at me, Doc? Because that’s really unprofessional, you know? When did that start? Yelling at your clients?” she seemed to have enough & again went for the little book next to her. “Oh, the notebook. That’s great.” sighing deeply, he braced himself to take her more seriously. “All right, give me a break. I’m trying, okay? This isn’t…This is new for me. I didn’t have a moment to deal with anything, you know? I had a little…calm in Wakanda. And other than that, I just went from one fight to another for 90 years.”
“So, now that you’ve stopped fighting, what do you want?” he had an answer in mind right away. Never ever would he say it out loud. It took him a second to reply. Because what he was about to say came in union with his first thought.
“Peace.”
“That is utter bullshit.” what a nice way to bad talk his answer. Maybe she was expecting something else from him. Maybe she knew the answer just as much as he did. The real answer.
“You’re a terrible shrink.”
“I was an excellent soldier, so I saw a lot of dead bodies, & I know how that can shut you down. And if you are alone…”
“Which I’m not because I have (Y/N).”
“…that is the quietest, most personal hell. And, James, it is very hard to escape. Look, I know that you have been through a lot, but you’ve got your mind back, you are being pardoned. I mean, these are good things. You’re free.”
“To do what?”
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Wednesday. Bucky usually went to Izzy. Today, he asked you to join him & Yori. Why he wanted you there with them? No clue. But it was not often he asked you to go somewhere with him so you agreed on meeting them there.
“Take a look.” Yori was a cute, old man. Reading his newspaper like a good citizen. Bucky had yet to give you an explanation as to why you were here right now. But for now, you just sat next to him, quietly observing your surroundings. “Nobody made it past 90 this week.” it was funny, to see Bucky trying his hardest to sound interested. Like he understood.
“So young. Such a shame.” his words made you scoff. Apparently, once you hit the 100 mark, you turn into a sarcastic piece. If you were not one before. If you ever made it to 100? Only the Gods knew what would come after that. Most people called you a sarcastic asshole now. Could that be topped?
“You guys didn’t order the usual, huh? Feeling a little adventurous?” the woman behind the counter directed her words at the three of you.
“Um, actually, I’ve never been here before, so…” you chuckled to avoid the awkwardness that would sure as hell build if you kept quiet now.
“You should ask her out.” Yori leaned over to Bucky & you almost choked on your food at his words. Bucky asking her out? Her? Yeah, she was beautiful & all. But her? Really? Seemed like that Yori dude did not know Bucky as well as he claimed to. You, on the other hand, were aware that nothing good would come out if it. Besides, they would not even make a nice couple. Shit, were you jealous? Oh no. Glancing over at the man next to you, his face showed just how much he despised this idea. At least something.
“Mm-mmm…” shaking his head frantically, he shot you a quick look but before his eyes locked onto yours, your gaze fell down to your plate. Slightly embarrassed. Scared that, if he looked at you, he would notice something behind your look. Something more. Something, that you wanted to keep hidden. For everyone’s sake.
“He would like to take you out on a date.” oh fuck off, Yori. You had nothing against this man but he was pushing your buttons. Could he not see that Bucky was incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of going on a date? With her? “Maybe to bingo or a night of pinochle.” hiding your laugh behind one of your hands, you could not believe that he was serious. Bucky & bingo? Well, it was for old people so you guessed it fit quite well. Not with her, though. Oh no, you really were jealous.
“I’m really sorry about him.” Bucky apologized for his friend’s behavior. Yes, you were sorry for him, too.
“Why are you sorry?” of course, now the woman was flirting with him. It got better & better. Taking a deep breath, you tried to keep your emotions at bay. You could not lash out in the middle of this restaurant, after all. Even though you were this close to doing just that. Deep breaths, you got this. “I’m game.” sure she was.
“Wow.” really? Bucky was impressed? By this? Oh come on, why would he settle for less when he could have so, so much more. But it was not your decision. He was not yours. You did not own him. Neither did you make the decisions for him.
“Tomorrow night, then?” Yori leaned over the counter.
“Tomorrow night’s great.” she replied with a bright smile.
“Hey, I just remembered something.” you spoke up all of a sudden. Bucky’s eyes met yours now & he saw that you were uncomfortable. Though, he could not pinpoint why. “Um, I-I need to go. See you, Buck. Bye guys.” sprinting out of the restaurant, you hoped nobody would follow you. Not in the mood to deal with anyone right now. All you wanted was to be alone right now. Your mind the only one keeping you company. But your mind was not really the kindest to you. Not in this particular moment. So what? Bucky had a date. You knew that would happen sooner or later. He was a good looking man. More importantly, you just wanted him to be happy. Genuinely happy.
Fucking great. Who could you talk to? You still were not done being mad at Sam. And now you were mad at Bucky for something he did not even do. He sort of did. He could have said no. If he really did not want to, he could have said no. Bucky was enough of a man to speak his mind, you knew that. Maybe he did want to go on a date with her. What was her name again? Not that you cared too much. But still. Blinking away the tears that had formed at the corners of your eyes, you kept on walking. Without a real destination. You were stupid. Friends. Why could you not accept this? Usually, you would call Steve in such a situation. Or even Tony. But it was too late now. They were not here anymore. You had to deal with that sooner or later. Whether you liked it or not. Contemplating calling Sam, you eyed your phone carefully. One more button. But nope. The anger was bigger than the need to talk to someone. Stubborn you. Wilson could make you feel better. But you would most likely end up yelling at him. And you knew you would regret your words later on. So might as well stay silent for the time being. Until you calmed down enough.
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It was 10 pm. Date time for Bucky. That same restaurant. Being the gentleman that we was, he even brought her flowers. Like it used to be back in the 40s.
“Well, if that’s not the most adorably old-fashioned thing anyone’s ever done.” Bucky felt lost. In her company. “Grab a seat, I’ll be done in a few.”
“Okay.” he could up & leave. It would not be too late. All he knew was that it felt wrong.
“So, have you dated much since half the fish in the sea came back?”
“Not really. I, um…tried the whole online dating thing. (Y/N), the girl who was here with me yesterday, she set up a profile for me because I didn’t understand a single thing.” laughing at the memory, he thought back to when he called you to ask you for a favor. How you laughed at him for wanting to try this whole bullshit. “It’s pretty crazy. A lot of weird pictures.”
“What kind of weird?”
“I mean, tiger photos? Half the time I don’t even know what I’m looking at. It’s…It’s a lot. When I showed (Y/N), she simply said that this was what I signed up for.”
“You sound like my dad.” definitely something a man did not want to hear while on a date. On the other hand, he did not even want this to be a date. “Wait. How old are you?
“A hundred & six.” only he could make it sound so casually. Like it was the most normal thing on this planet. Both laughed at his words. Simply because it was so absurd.
“What’s up with your big gloves?” a sensitive topic she just touched.
“I, um, have, uh…poor circulation.” sure thing.
“Hmm…Hey, what is it about this (Y/N) girl & you?” his eyes widened at her question. What was she getting at?
“She’s my friend. Why?” his dumbfounded expression made her chuckle.
“A friend, huh?”
“Um, yeah.”
“You sure about that?” an eyebrow raised. A questioning stare was sent his way.
“Why does everyone think I don’t have friends?” throwing his head back in frustration, he let out a long sigh.
“It’s not that.” she stopped briefly, thinking about her next words carefully. “Just, you guys seem pretty close.”
“Well, we’ve known each other for years.” he reasoned, gesturing with his hands to bring his point across.
“Yeah? And the looks you’re shooting each other when the other one’s not looking?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You two aren’t really subtle about this, you know?” she wiped the counter & did not even look at Bucky. He, on the other hand, started sweating.
“Subtle about what?”
“Oh, come on. Who are you kidding? I don’t even know why you’re here right now.”
“Because Yori set you & me up on a date.”
“And why did you agree?” she crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for an explanation from the man in front of her.
“I-I don’t know.” he responded truthfully. Because he thought it to be polite? Because Yori was the one who suggested it? Honestly, he was not sure.
“That’s what I thought. Look, you’re a nice guy & all but…just, listen to your heart from time to time. It’s late. You should head out. See you.” she turned around & walked further into the restaurant. Leaving Bucky alone with his thoughts. It was clear what she intended. Did not mean that it made this entire situation any easier. Bucky left without another word. Fresh air would help him think straight.
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Your phone rang & you sighed when you checked who decided to annoy you. Bucky. Of course. But wait. Should he not be on his date right now? Did something go wrong? Not that you wanted it to but if you were entirely honest, you would not be mad about it either.
“Hi Buck. What’s up?”
“I need your help with something.” there was no hesitation in his voice. Just him being straight forward.
“Please don’t tell me you need help on how to get the girl.” it was your way to lighten the mood. You did that because you could tell that he was incredibly serious. Usually, this was never a good sign.
“Can I send you an address? Can you meet me there as soon as possible?” his voice was low, deep.
“Um, sure thing. But just to set things clear…I won’t join in on your fun, Buck. That’s between you & her.” again, sarcasm was your way of coping with emotions. Though, it was not the right time to use it right now. His next words were proof enough. You should not mess with him. Not in this moment.
“Can you be serious for a second?” he raised his voice a little. It was not much but it was enough to leave you confused. Bucky was not the person to yell at you. Especially not like this.
“I’m sorry…Um, yeah, tell me where & I’ll get there as fast as I can.” gulping down, you waited for him to give you more information.
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Arriving at an unfamiliar building, you could make out Bucky’s form in front of it. Why would he want to meet you here? Where was his date?
“Buck?” your voice barely above a whisper. The night sky only illuminated by the moon that shone brightly. Providing just a tiny bit of light. Enough, to let you notice your surroundings.
“Thanks for coming.” you could tell that he was stressed, tough, you were not sure why.
“Is everything alright? Because I swear, if that woman did anyth-“
“No, she didn’t. Promise.” his warm smile was encouraging enough. It was clear that he was not lying to you. “Just…didn’t work out. But that’s not why you’re here.”
“Okay?”
“My last nightmare. Do you remember?” nodding for him to continue. “How I killed that innocent man?”
“It wasn’t you, Buck. You were being controlled.” touching his shoulder softly, squeezing it to reassure him.
“Whatever…That guy, it was Yori’s son. I want to, need to, apologize. Even though the apology comes way too late.” you nodded at him, your eyes meeting his briefly. Now you knew why he called you. He did not want to do this alone. No. He wanted you by his side. To support him through it. Entering the building together, Bucky led you to the apartment Yori lived in. His hand raised to knock on the door. Surprisingly, he did not waste any time. He wanted to get this over with. Understandingly so. No words were exchanged. You being here, with him, that was more than enough.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” Yori opened the door, his face showed confusion by the appearance of you two. “How was the date?” you could not help but roll your eyes at the old man in front of you. Looking at Bucky, you were worried when you saw him having an internal conversation with himself. Mouth opening & closing again. No words coming out. Risking a look inside the apartment, you noticed a small picture frame with who you assumed to be his son. The one Bucky killed. No. The one the Winter Soldier killed.
“It was…It was good.” Bucky mumbled.
“Bullshit.” you followed after. None of them heard you, though. Luckily.
“Forgot I owed you for lunch.” Bucky handed him money. If you were not mistaken, this was not a form of apologizing. He had a hard time, though, that much was obvious. Afterwards, Bucky turned around & walked away without another word. Which left you alone with a confused looking Yori.
“I’m sorry for the disturbance, sir. Have a good night.” plastering on the sweetest smile you could offer, you followed Bucky outside. Jogging to keep up with the super soldier.
Back outside, you saw Bucky holding his little notebook in his hands. You knew about it. Because you were the only person he talked to when it came to his therapy sessions. A look over his shoulder could tell that his eyes were trained on the name being circled. His body was tense. That was not what he planned.
“It’s okay, Bucky.” your hand stroked over his lower back in a comforting way. Your forehead rested against his shoulder, hoping, that it would ease him a little. You could feel him calm down at your touch. “Give yourself some time.” you mumbled quietly, knowing he could hear you clearly due to the calm night. You just hoped that he would not beat himself up too much. Not more than he already did.
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You were back in your own apartment. Still no words from Sam. But that was nothing new. Sometimes, he would go radio silent for a few days but after that, he would always check in with you. Maybe he figured that you were mad at him. For giving away the shield & all. And he probably was busy with work. The work he did with Torres. If he needed your help, he would call you for sure. Your TV got your attention again. Something told you to watch closely. So you did.
“Unrest, in the wake of recent events, has left us vulnerable. Every day Americans feel it. While we love heroes who put their lives on the line to defend Earth, we also need a hero to defend this country. We need a real person who embodies America’s greatest values. We need someone to inspire us again, someone who can be a symbol for all of us. So, on behalf of the Department of Defense & our Commander-in-Chief, it is with great honor that we announce here today that the United States of America has a new hero. Join me in welcoming your new Captain America.” the crowd cheered loudly & someone walked through the door. You could not believe what was happening. Please, this had to be a bad dream. When would you wake up form this hell? A man, wearing his suit, holding his shield, greeted the people. Looking at your hands, you could see small, blue sparks forming at the tips of your fingers. That only ever happened when you had no control over your emotions. Right now, you were everything but in control. Of course he had to wink at the camera like the sick person he was.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me…” breathing out lowly, you put your head into your hands, completely ignoring the sparks there. You did not feel them anyway. If you ever met this son of a bitch it would not end well for him. And the next time you would meet Wilson? Fingers crossed he could deal with your angry & disappointed self. Because you were seething.
~to be continued~
Next Chapter
Published (04/02/2021) by Cathy
Tags: @taina-eny​, @tanyaherondale​, @cool-ultra-nerd​, @toribentleyva, @buckyandlokirunmylife​, @annadier​, @howlongtillidie​, @mizz-kraziii, @theetherealbloom​, @millenniumloki​, @marvelbros-oneshots​, @ajbwasnthere, @bilesxbilinskixlahey​, @mystictimetravelcolor​, @dbrees256​, @sxpxrnxturxl, @dreamydreamerwriting​, @dolllstyles​, @angelicastiel​, @prettysbliss, @infinitelyforgotten​, @sweetserendipity65​, @lilystilinskicullen​, @partypoisonsblog, @btdsprayberry, @sarai-ibn-la-ahad​, @deamus-liv​, @simplybarnes​, @sethcohenluvr (let me know if you wanna be tagged <3)
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robininthelabyrinth · 4 years
Note
I love your Nie brothers content, all of it, but there is so little written about the friendship between Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian! We know they were friends in Cloud Recesses, but it's never explored how these genius guys, even if one is focused on magical inovations and the other on strategy and politics, got on. Something which shows how well they got each other would be great
1
Wei Wuxian’s fist trembled. How dare he – worthless peacock – my shijie..!
But before he could throw a punch, he saw a swirl of white – Lan Wangji, sweeping forward with a face like a graveyard, and Nie Huaisang cringing in his shadow – and suddenly he realized that he didn’t need to punch Jin Zixuan.
Speaking of others behind their backs is forbidden.
Sneering without reason is forbidden.
Arrogance is forbidden.
Do not be haughty and complacent.
Do not praise yourself and slander others.
Do not make assumptions about others.
Do not insult people.
Do not take your words lightly.
Wei Wuxian grinned with teeth. “Hey, Lan Zhan!” he sang out, and Jin Zixuan blanched. “Perfect timing!”
Later, after he’d laughed himself sick at Jin Zixuan’s punishment – humiliatingly perfect – and making his appreciation very clear to Lan Wangji, he went to go find Nie Huaisang.
“When did you go get Lan Zhan?” he asked, honestly curious. He hadn’t known he was going to get into a fight until he was there and it was happening, but Nie Huaisang, of all people, had apparently figured out what was going to happen before it happened and took steps to fix it.
“The second they started talking about girls,” Nie Huaisang said promptly. “It’s fairly obvious that Jin Zixuan is resentful of his parents managing his life and he’s lashing out at everything, including specifically your shijie, so a nasty comment was inevitable.”
Wei Wuxian blinked, derailed from his original line of questioning. “He – what? Wait, that’s why he’s so rude about my shijie?”
“Of course,” Nie Huaisang said, blinking back at him. “What did you think? That he just didn’t like her? He’s barely even met her.”
Wei Wuxian hadn’t thought about that way, but it made a certain amount of sense. “When did you get so good at reading people?” he asked, bemused. “I didn’t…uh…”
“Think I have any skills?”
Wei Wuxian coughed.
“I don’t!” Nie Huaisang beamed, clearly very proud of it. “But I do have a lot of expensive hobbies, and that means I need pocket money.”
Wei Wuxian wasn’t sure he understood the connection, and said as much.
Nie Huaisang laughed at him. “The Nie sect believes in self-sufficiency,” he explained. “My brother gives me a certain amount of money to spend, sure, but we’re not the Jin sect; I can’t just buy everything that I lay my eyes on and send the bill back home – my brother would break my legs! I’m expected to find a way to increase the money I get until it’s enough to cover both my needs and wants, necessities and luxuries both, and if I can’t, then I have to do without luxuries.”
Nie Huaisang has never, not once, in the entire few months Wei Wuxian spent in his company, done without luxuries.
“So,” Wei Wuxian said, feeling oddly unnerved and unsure why, “you learned how to read people because you want to act like…a merchant?”
Nie Huaisang lightly tapped his head with his fan, rolling his eyes at him. “Stop being such a landed gentry young master, Wei-xiong. There’s nothing wrong with trade! How much of your sect’s money comes from merchants interested in keeping their trade routes free of resentful energy?”
Wei Wuxian wrinkled his nose a little. “That’s cheapening it a bit, don’t you think? As cultivators, it’s our duty to stand up as heroes, to defend the innocent and defeat evil, to purify –”
“Right, right. Remind me again how the Jiang sect pays for all that pretty purple?”
“Well…I mean…”
Technically, yes, there were all the dye sellers and the fabric merchants, but…
Nie Huaisang was laughing at him.
“Don’t worry about it, Wei-xiong,” he said, wiping his eyes. “You stick to doing your own thing. If you ever need to sell anything, come to me.”
“Of course,” Wei Wuxian said, privately thinking to himself that he’d rather farm for crops than become a seller hawking his goods in the marketplace. “Hey, wait, what is it that you sell, anyway?”
Nie Huaisang sniggered and refused to tell him.
2
It was porn.
Also barbeque and liquor, although in that case Nie Huaisang mostly played the middleman between the vendors of Caiyi Town and the students stuck eating Lan vegetables.
Sometimes he could even be convinced to tug on his contacts for other things, too.
“You’re a true friend,” Wei Wuxian said, clutching the bottle of chili sauce to his chest. “A true and wonderful friend.”
“You still have to pay,” Nie Huaisang said, his eyes curving up behind his fan. “No discounts.”
“A ruthless, vicious, cut-throat friend…”
“I lend you the porn for free, don’t I?
“Wonderful! Wonderful friend!”
3
No matter what Jiang Cheng said, Wei Wuxian was trying to keep his head down during their time at the indoctrination camp. He was taking this whole thing very seriously: he wasn’t making a fuss (too much), he wasn’t being insulting (too much), he wasn’t even socializing (too much).
Lan Wangji didn’t count, anyway; after what had happened to him, he needed someone bothering him.
But Wei Wuxian was being good and keeping back from the rest!
Well, he was, except then he saw Nie Huaisang and just had to go over to say hello. It was only polite, and had nothing to do with the fact that during the months he spent at the Cloud Recesses, he’d learned that Nie Huaisang could sell anyone on anything.
“I don’t suppose you have contacts that will sell you barbeque here,” Wei Wuxian said as a greeting, because the food they’d received was frankly disgusting in a way that made him wistful for the Lan sect like it had been a gourmet restaurant.
“Well,” Nie Huaisang hedged, and Wei Wuxian’s eyebrows shot up. “Don’t get too excited, it’s not barbeque…”
It was meat, though, chunks of that had probably been roasted as skewers at one point, and Wei Wuxian didn’t even care that it was cold as he scarfed it down, immediately feeling ten times better than he’d been before.
“Where?” he asked. “How?”
“There’ll be a surprise inspection tomorrow morning,” Nie Huaisang said instead. “Keep your head down, they’re looking to make an example out of somebody.”
“How do you know that?”
Nie Huaisang shrugged. “I brought art.”
“To the indoctrination camp?”
“Wen soldiers get lonely and bored too, Wei-xiong.”
“You’re trading for information using porn?”
“Don’t be silly. I’m trading porn for meat, and getting the information while we’re chatting. A large number of the Wen sect cultivators used to be their own sects, you know, before they were absorbed, and not all of them are happy about what’s going on here. You just have to figure out who the loyalists are, avoid them, and focus on the rest, and it’s easy.”
“I still can’t believe you brought porn to the Wen sect,” Wei Wuxian said, shaking his head. “What’ll you do if your brother finds out?”
“You’re joking, right? He helped me pack it.”
Wei Wuxian will never understand the Nie sect.
4
Wei Wuxian stared wordlessly at his bowl.
There was a single slice of radish in it.
“Is this a joke?” he asked Wen Qing, because it might be, and she glared at him, meaning that no, it was not. “Don’t we have anything else?”
“With what money, Wen-gongzi? Do you think it comes from thin air?”
“I had a friend once who could make it come out of thin air,” he grumbled, looking down at his bowl. He’d practiced inedia, he didn’t need it, except for the fact that he really, really did. Not having a golden core made things hard. “He could’ve sold fish to fishermen, except he mostly just sold porn.”
Wen Qing rolled her eyes at him. “Wonderful story, Wei-gongzi. Positively heartwarming. But unless your old erotic art dealer is going to come to Yiling to help us sell some radishes, I don’t care.”
Naturally, that was impossible. Wei Wuxian was a villain now, his name blackened, the whole cultivation world against him –
Actually, as far as he could tell, the Nie sect didn’t seem to give a damn about him one way or another. From all the stories Nie Huaisang had told about his brother and from everything he’d seen in the war, Nie Mingjue wasn’t the sort of person to let evil sit around on a mountain while he was busy with other things – if he objected, he’d be there the next day with his saber, ready to put him in his place.
He hadn’t, obviously.
His hatred of the Wen sect was pretty well-known, but he’d taken no action at all to invade Yiling and demand that Wei Wuxian hand them over, and Wei Wuxian was mostly sure that it wasn’t because he was scared of what Wei Wuxian could do with the Stygian Tiger Seal.
…it was probably just the hunger getting to him and making him think crazy things. Not caring enough to go against him was pretty far from supporting him, after all.
But, hey, he wouldn’t be risking anything if he just wrote a tiny little letter asking Nie Huaisang for some advice on selling things, right?
I never thought I’d see the day my Wei-xiong finally became a merchant, the return letter said. I’ll be there in three days. I expect to see liquor.
Wei Wuxian took Wen Ning down the mountain and stood on his shoulders in order to emancipate a jar from the local tavern, but by the time Nie Huaisang arrived, there was, in fact, liquor.
Even Wen Qing – who had opposed the entire outing once she had heard about it upon their return – suddenly thought it was a perfectly reasonable sort of theft when Nie Huaisang offered to trade a giant crate full of meat for it.
“We had some leftovers from a boar hunt,” Nie Huaisang said mournfully, accepting the liquor and a bowl of radishes. “I need variety, Wei-gongzi, it’s terrible. You have to help me get rid of it; I can’t stand to look at it any longer.”
“You’re not supposed to be here,” Wei Wuxian reminded him in between glorious bites of pork. He was going to be a very good friend and do his best to ensure that Nie Huaisang’s request was fulfilled, even if it meant taking seconds and possibly thirds. “I asked for advice, not a visit.”
“You can’t expect me to put my good name on what could be inferior goods,” Nie Huaisang sniffed.
“Your good name? The one known for porn, you mean?”
Nie Huaisang rolled his eyes at him. “So show me what you have to sell.”
“It’s mostly just the radishes,” Wei Wuxian said. “I tried to tell Wen Qing that we should plant potatoes, but –”
“Forget the radishes,” Nie Huaisang said. “What’s this I hear about you designing a compass that pinpoints resentful energy?”
“Oh, that?” Wei Wuxian said, blinking. “Yeah, I made one of those – the Burial Mounds is the biggest source of resentful energy around, and it’s easier to have a compass that points home instead of north, you know? But what does that have to do with selling radishes?”
“Wei-xiong, you’re hopeless. Leave it all to me, and you’ll have your sect up and running in no time.”
“Yeah, that would be – wait, sect? What sect?”
“Actually,” Nie Huaisang said, tapping his fan against his cheek. He was just plain old ignoring Wei Wuxian now, which, hey! “I take it back – before you leave everything to me, show me what other ideas you’ve been cooking up. What about those talismans you used during the war? The spirit-drawing ones?”
“Spirit summoning,” Wei Wuxian corrected.
“Yes, those. Have you improved on those at all?”
“Uh, I mean, I guess…”
“Good. Show me everything.”
5
“So I have a sect now,” Wei Wuxian told Lan Wangji, who had come to visit. “We sell things to support it. Apparently.”
Lan Wangji nodded, apparently already aware of this. “The clan elders have agreed that using your flags to draw fierce corpses and other creatures away from areas with innocent human lives is an acceptable use.”
“Even the Lan sect?” Wei Wuxian marveled. “No wonder we’re making so much money.”
Then he sighed.
Lan Wangji looked questioningly at him.
“Well, I have a sect now,” Wei Wuxian said. “Everyone’s expecting me to – you know. Form the core of the sect.”
“Marry,” Lan Wangji concluded. Possibly advised? No, that didn’t sound like he was urging him to go ahead, which made a total of one person. “You do not have to if you do not wish. You already have an heir.”
“A-Yuan’s too young to be a proper heir,” Wei Wuxian objected, though he was secretly gleeful that people were generally accepting him as one. “And obviously I can’t just pick anyone; how will I know if they’re a spy? Or if they’ll secretly dislike A-Yuan?” He sighed again. “The worst part is, I think Nie Huaisang is plotting against me, too.”
“Plotting?”
“Yeah! He’s encouraging people to ask me about marriage, when clearly it’s better for me to stay off the market…what about you, Lan Zhan? Are you planning on marrying?”
“No,” Lan Wangji said.
“We’ll be a bunch of old bachelors, then,” Wei Wuxian said. “You should come more often, A-Yuan loves you…hey! I have a great idea! Why don’t we get married? Then no one will bother us ever again!”
“Mm,” Lan Wangji said.
“Mm? What does that mean?”
“It means I will need to send Nie Huaisang his payment in the morning,” Lan Wangji said, and moved to sit next to Wei Wuxian.
“Payment? You bought something from him? What did you want to –”
Lan Wangji silenced him pretty effectively, no spell necessary, and by the time Wei Wuxian retained enough ability to think through what exactly the purchase must have been, he’d already been converted to thinking that it was a very intelligent purchase to make.
Nie Huaisang really could sell anything.
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exmormondragon · 3 years
Text
So I went to church yesterday
And it was certainly interesting.
I walk in wearing casual clothes, and ask if I’m here on time. Apparently I found the wrong schedule, and I got there just as the ward for my area was finishing up. But the next ward is halfway through their first hour, and so I slide into class to listen.
Everyone had masks, thankfully, and there was sanitizer out. I notice things that seem strange to my small-town experience, like most of the men are wearing sweatervests instead of white shirts and ties. The teacher for the class I was in had a voice that I would hesitantly say was the classic ‘gay’ voice a lot of guys use, which actually kind of shocked me to hear it in church.
One thing I shouldn’t have been surprised by was that no one asked me many identifying questions. I was prepared (for whatever reason) to be pretty vague about why I left or just say ‘Faith issues’ and maybe inspire a discussion. I’m feel like I’m okay at coming off as non-argumentative, so I figured maybe I’d get an interesting conversation or two.
But when I said “I haven’t been for about two years”, of course no one asked “Why?” I simply got a few “Welcome back!”s and a couple “Welcome Home!”
Because of course they aren’t going to ask about why I left. And they all assume that I was there searching for the Faith I lost, or for that good feeling that they assume everyone misses when they leave the church. No questions, because they didn’t think they needed to know anything about me.
So I sat down for sacrament meeting, and waited a little while. I was prepared to take notes, listen, and compare to the Recovering Agency book, see what things I could recognize and what things I could question.
That was when a sweet old lady stopped next to me and asked “Are you alone?”
When I answered that, yes, I was, she sat down next to me and hung out with me for the rest of the meeting, conveniently giving me a LOT of my material for this.
Just… wow. The pressure from this sweet old lady was strong, made all the worse because she was genuine. And very handsy too, constantly reaching out to touch my arm or hand to beckon me to be a part of the sustaining of callings. Something I wouldn’t have noticed before, but looking back I realize how much flagrant disregard there is for personal space by members of the church, especially older members.
She asked me some questions, talked about how wonderful the community of the church was (“Though of course, you have to come to church and learn people’s names to be a part of the community!”) and expressed how glad she was that I was coming back to church.
No questions about “Are you going to come back again? Are you planning on staying?” Just affirmations that I was. Throughout the meeting, she would comment on how she was going to see me next week, asked me to write down my name so she could remember it next week, gave me her number just in case I needed to call her.
When the sustaining of callings happened, and I didn’t raise my hand (I didn’t know anyone there, after all, how could I promise to support them and thank them for their service with any authenticity?) she reached out to tug my hand up (as politely as that can be done without asking) and say “Go ahead, you can raise your hand to sustain them too!”
When we sang the hymns (an uncommon one, and obedience-themed hymn, and two praise-god hymns) she commented on how nicely I sang, that it reminded her of her late husband, and how she would like to hear it next week too.
The theme this week was “God’s love.”, and so both the talks talked only about that. I’m going to have to put that all in a separate post because HOOBOY there’s a lot. So many vague quotes, stories, expressions of feelings.
Funniest thing was, I thought I was going to have to write my notes down in some sort of vague code so if my new friend looked over my shoulder she wouldn’t see a whole bunch of criticism. But frankly, all I had to do was write down a ton of direct quotes, and I got what I needed. It’s insane to me that people talk like that over the pulpit, so that I’m able to write down “God’s love is unconditional, but his blessings are not.” and no one around me thinks that’s strange.
I mean, heck, I didn’t think it was strange most of my life. Only now, after so many new things to think about, do I look back and realize how messed up so many of the things we talked about were.
After the talks and singing and prayer, she makes one more point of saying “I’ll see you next week!” And the best I could manage in reply was a “Maybe…” just to stay non-committal.
Mmm. It was an experience. And it wasn’t all bad. But it certainly was an eye-opener, and a reminder of what I escaped.
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sgtjbbhasmyheart · 4 years
Text
Drunk Texting Is(n’t) Bad for Your Health- Chapter Five
Series Summary: Talk about your unconventional meet-cute! Bucky receives a text by mistake requesting he prove he's not Reader's sister. The easy dialogue between Reader and Bucky sparks a natural friendship, but could it lead to more? Bucky still deems himself unworthy of any form of affection or love. Reader is hellbent to prove him wrong. With the help of some (meddling) friends along the way, Bucky may get his happily-ever-after after all.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Word Count: 3601
Warnings: ANGST, Bucky most definitely needs a hug halfway through this, bad language words
A/N: I’m flattered and frankly overwhelmed with the love and support everyone is showing for this little story. Thank you from the bottom of my heart! 🥰
A/N 2: divider credit- @firefly-graphics
In case you missed the update, I will try to publish a new chapter every Saturday from here on out. 🤞
DO NOT copy or replicate without my permission
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Whistles and sirens were blaring inside Bucky’s head as he stared at Peter’s neighbor. Everything within him was screaming at him to run away. His anxiety ticked up. Could this really be (Y/N)? 
He would have recognized her voice anywhere. God only knew how many times he’d listened and relistened to her voicemail. He wasn’t obsessive; he just liked the dips-the peaks and valleys-in her voice and the self-deprecating laugh she’d made. And with his super soldier hearing- he’d learned a knack for these things.
Bucky stood unmoving and breathless while shaking (Y/N)’s hand in front of her door. All he could do was stare at her. He had never imagined in a million years meeting her face-to-face. It was like a dream. A weird but wonderful dream. 
He was stunned by her beauty as he gazed into her smiling face. Not that he’d ever pictured her being unattractive.
No siree.
It was a shock to have her here now, but to have her looking the way she did? (Y/N) was gorgeous. Her eyes sparkled with giddiness, and pink tinged the apples of her cheeks.
He must have finally died and gone to heaven. That was the only explanation he could think of right now.
Because there (Y/N) was, in front of him and in the flesh, still shaking his hand.
Still.
Bucky’s stomach swooped with the feeling of embarrassment. He could feel the skin of his face warming quickly. He was just like Lang meeting Steve at the airport in Germany. An overeager puppy. 
God, he was an idiot.
He caught an uncomfortable look flash across (Y/N)’s face but continued pumping her arm. Peter cleared his throat beside him, and (Y/N) grinned wider in response. 
A dazzling smile.
“Gonna need my hand back to unlock the door,” she said with a soft chuckle. 
Bucky dropped it like he’d been burned. He could see Peter giving him a goofy look out of the corner of his eye. Like that kid wasn’t awkward as fuck around girls. “Sorry,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck with his flesh hand. 
What was he thinking, shaking her hand so long?
Bucky clumsily followed (Y/N) and Peter into her apartment after the deadbolt was unlocked and nearly dumped her grocery bags on the floor. He couldn’t take his eyes away from her. Peter threw him another weird look.
“Please excuse my friend,” Peter quipped, patting Bucky on the shoulder.  “Apparently, he just learned to walk yesterday.”
(Y/N) laughed politely at the joke, and Bucky blushed furiously. 
From the stories Steve had told him about their past and “sweeping dames off their feet,” why was this so hard? It should be like taking candy from a baby. He had a rapport with her, not that she knew, but it should be more comfortable than it was. His shoulders slumped.
“S-sorry,” Bucky stuttered out. (Y/N) smiled sweetly at the apology, and his chest constricted.
“Don’t worry about it,” (Y/N) reasoned, “I just had the floors waxed.” She winked at him as she grabbed a bag from his arms.
Bucky’s breath caught in his throat. She winked. She fucking winked!  
Was (Y/N) flirting? Did he flirt back? Did he even remember how? He would have known what to do if they were texting instead. Their whole relationship was easier when they weren’t face-to-face. When he couldn’t see how the light in the kitchen made her hair shine or how her eyes twinkled when she laughed, he was a lot smoother. 
Smooth like creamy peanut butter. 
It was so frustrating only remembering bits and snatches of his old memories. This situation was nothing like the girl at the coffee shop he sometimes visited or the corner market’s cashier. This was (Y/N). This was someone he’d reciprocate the advances from- given half a chance. Someone he definitely didn’t have feelings for, though.
Nope. Not at all. 
From somewhere hidden deep inside, the darkness crept in. You think she’s flirting with you? You think she wants someone like you? She pities you, his inner voice said—pity for a sad, broken man. 
The breath previously stuck inside him rushed out in a sob.  His stomach plunged to his feet again, but not in embarrassment this time. This time, it was for actually believing he might have a chance with (Y/N). Thinking she’d settle for someone like him. 
He was dangerous. He was a murderer.
(Y/N)’s face filled with concern, eyebrows pinching together, and she edged closer. She raised a hand to touch him but thought twice. “You okay?”
Bucky shook his head to dispel the bleak thoughts. “Ye-yeah, sorry.” The room kept spinning. 
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Would you like some water?” (Y/N) asked, rushing to the cupboard to pull down a glass to fill.
Peter stepped closer to his side. “You don’t look too good, man. Yer not havin’ one of your flashbacks, are ya?”
Bucky looked at Peter for a moment, puzzled. Flashback? His grapefruit was too scrambled to conjure up any of the horrors he experienced at night during the day. “No, kid. I’m fine,” he lied. 
Peter inched back slightly, but still within reach if the worst should happen. 
Bucky saw (Y/N) watching him expectantly, tilting the glass in his direction. “No, thank you, ma’am. Water won’t be necessary.”
He observed (Y/N)’s eyes slowly widen in shock.  
“Ma’am?” (Y/N) asked in mock offense. “Ma’am?”
Peter started laughing as Bucky’s mouth popped open in a horrified “O.” He tried to protest, but nothing would come out. 
(Y/N) turned to Peter, who was now gasping in laughter. “It’s the cardigan, huh?” she questioned jokingly. “It makes me look like a crazy cat lady, doesn’t it?”
Bucky’s face flushed instantly. “That’s not…” he argued, the end of his sentence coming out as a groan instead. 
How had this night and their meeting gone downhill so quickly? He couldn’t do anything right around (Y/N), it seemed.
How could he win her heart if he was just some bumbling fool? 
Oh, god! Was he actively trying to win (Y/N) over?
Bucky’s pulse hammered underneath his skin. He’d finally met the girl he was falling for, and he was mucking up the whole thing. The instinct to flee suddenly kicked into high gear. 
He took one last look at Peter, hunched over in laughter and holding his stomach. Bucky narrowed his eyes at the kid. He had some nerve! He slid his eyes over to where (Y/N) stood. Her expression was rapidly morphing from good-humored to regret. 
Bucky placed the final bag he held on the counter and huffed a sigh before walking past (Y/N) and Peter out of the kitchen, heading for the door. (Y/N) caught the nook of his elbow as he passed, stopping him.
He looked down at the delicate fingers wrapped around his arm, and his heart lurched. She wasn’t afraid, he thought. She knew who he was- what he was- and she wasn’t afraid. He brought his gaze back up to hers. He could easily break every finger of her hand, but there was no fear in her eyes—just remorse.
“I apologize,” (Y/N) assured. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” Her hand skimmed down his forearm to his wrist and left behind the fleeting feeling of her touch.
“It’s fine,” Bucky said gruffly. “I was leaving anyway.” He nodded at Peter, who had managed to pull himself together from his laughing fit, and gave (Y/N) a thin-lipped smile. He made his way to the door. 
(Y/N)’s face dropped as he walked away. “Oh. Well, thank you for your help with my groceries,” she called.
Bucky’s step faltered as he walked through the doorway. He glanced over his shoulder at (Y/N) for a moment and shut the door.
He had had no desire to leave the radiant presence of (Y/N), but if he didn't, the fluttering he felt inside would have turned into a full-blown panic attack while thinking about every misstep he’d taken. 
Reaching the sidewalk outside (Y/N) and Peter’s building, Bucky expelled a huge exhale. 
“Well, that was a fucking disaster,” he grumbled to himself. 
He stomped down the sidewalk to where he’d parked the car he’d borrowed from the compound. He wrenched the driver-side door open in frustration, nearly ripping the thing off. He slid inside and stared out the windshield. Was there a way back from this? Or was he destined to spend eternity in the friend zone?
Bucky wrung his hands around the steering wheel and let out a moan of exasperation. He started the ignition and gave one last glance to (Y/N)’s building. He tucked away any hope he thought he might’ve had with her in the far recesses of his mind and drove away. 
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Bucky was trembling by the time he returned to the compound. He clenched and unclenched his fists as he strode down one of the many halls leading to his quarters. He had worked himself into a frenzy on the drive home. 
It was her, he thought, gliding his gloved hand through the hair that had come loose from the earlier knot he’d tied. It was definitely (Y/N).
There was no mistaking it was her, now. Bucky was absolutely sure. (Y/N)’s voicemail had played over and over in his mind on the ride upstate.
Bucky stalked down the hallway, cursing himself again for blowing any modicum of a chance he had with (Y/N).
What was he saying? Did he stand a real chance with her? He was The Winter fucking Solider. The Asset. Soldat. 
Of course not.
He growled as he moved closer to his apartment, his sanctuary. It was the only place he could find any real solace nowadays.
Struggling with his internal conflict, focusing too much on the what-ifs, he didn’t see the solid wall of muscle until it was too late.
“Whoa, Buck! Easy there,” Steve said as he steadied his dazed best friend. “Where’s the fire?”
Bucky glimpsed into Steve’s eyes, his own shimmering with sadness. Steve thought the world of him. He could do no wrong, according to Steve. What would he think after this? 
“Are you okay?” Steve asked, voice full of worry. 
“I fucked up, Stevie,” Bucky lamented, eyes now downcast to the floor.
“What happened?” Steve asked, grabbing hold of Bucky’s shoulder.  “What did you do?”
Bucky’s eyes flicked back up to Steve’s face, and he watched fear crawl across it.
His body practically crumpled inwardly. “It was her,” Bucky said. “She was right in front of me.”
“Her who?” Steve questioned. The look of fear slipped into one of misunderstanding once he realized no immediate threat or harm was coming to Bucky.
Bucky chuckled. “(Y/N).” His focus wasn’t on Steve anymore, but just over his right shoulder. His eyes were wistful. 
“(Y/N)?”
“Yeah,” he sighed. “She was so...God, she was just so beautiful.”
Bucky proceeded when Steve continued to stare at him blankly. “She was a breath of fresh air after you’ve run at full-speed for what seems, like, forever.”
“A breath of fresh air?”
“Yes!”
“I’m still not exactly sure who we’re talkin’ about,” Steve confessed.
“God, punk! Pay attention,” Bucky groused, swiping both hands through his hair.
“Who’s (Y/N) again?”
“She’s the girl,” Bucky explained.
“The girl?” Steve asked, still not quite understanding.
“The girl,” Bucky emphasized.
A look of realization finally dawned on Steve’s face. “(Y/N)? The girl you’ve been texting?”
“YES!” Bucky exclaimed emphatically. “For a smart guy, you can be pretty dense.”
“Wait, how?”
“I was helping Parker with some schoolwork, and she’s his neighbor, apparently,” Bucky answered.
“She’s Peter’s neighbor? In Queens?” 
“Did you have a stroke or somethin’?” Bucky wondered. “Yes, in Queens. Next door to Parker.” 
“You didn’t tell me she was in New York,” Steve said, a hint of hurt in his voice.
“I didn’t think it mattered at the time,” Bucky admitted. “It wasn’t like I ever planned to meet her in person.”
“So, what now? Did you ask her on a date?” 
“What?!” Bucky asked in disbelief. He goggled at his best friend like he’d grown a second head. “What part of ‘I fucked up’ didn’t you understand?”
“It couldn’t’ve been that bad,” Steve soothed. “What exactly happened?”
Bucky recounted the whole bungled interaction, down to every gory detail.
“And you just stood there, staring at her?” Steve asked, slightly wincing in secondhand discomfort.
“With my mouth open and everything. Like I was a goddamn fish out of water,” Bucky stated candidly. He scuffed a foot across the linoleum floor. He could feel the anxiety building inside him again.
“Maybe it’s not as bad as you think?” 
Bucky pulled his phone from his pocket and thumbed to the messaging app. “Parker said, and I quote, ‘Way to make it weird with Miss (Y/L/N).’”
Steve looked nonplussed. “H-how?”
Bucky threw up his arms in defeat. His hands landed atop his head, and his fingers snaked into his hair, pulling at the roots. “I dunno what happened! I realized I was actually talking to (Y/N), and my insides turned to jelly!” 
Steve stepped forward and guided Bucky’s hands from his hair. Empathy and compassion filled his crystalline eyes.
“How...how do I fix this, Stevie?” Bucky whimpered softly.
Steve sighed. “I don’t know if it can be fixed, but you need to talk to her.”
Bucky blanched at the thought. “I-I-I can’t,” he stammered.
“Why?”
“I like what we have,” Bucky explained. “I like that I’m just James from Brooklyn with her.”
His mouth thinned as he picked at his flesh hand’s thumbnail. “Plus, if I tell (Y/N) who I really am, she’ll judge everything going forward on today’s meeting.”
“You really like her, huh?” Steve queried.
“Well, yeah,” Bucky answered, blushing a bit. “She’s pretty great.”
A smirk lifted at the corners of Steve’s mouth. “No, I mean, you really like her.”
Bucky’s blush deepened. “I don’t-I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.”
Steve huffed a small laugh, faintly shaking his head. He held up his hands in mock surrender. He took a step closer to his best friend. “Whatever you decide to do- whether it’s to tell her the truth or just suss out the situation- just talk to her.” He placed a hand on Bucky’s right shoulder and squeezed gently. “Don’t wait too long, though, and miss your opportunity. You’ll be kickin’ yourself.”
Bucky nodded his head in agreement. “I know.”
“Everyone deserves good things to come to them. You most of all, Buck.” Steve squeezed one more time before dropping his hand to his side.
Bucky blinked rapidly at the sentiment, trying his best to keep the emotion out of his eyes. He smiled. “Thank you, Steve. For everything.”
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After a long shower to help himself unwind and wash away all the stress of the day, Bucky was sprawled out on his bed in a t-shirt and loose-fitting sweats. His phone was in the palm of his hand, and his heart was doing flip flops in his chest. His anxiety was gradually spiking, undoing the purpose of the earlier shower. It had been nearly two hours since he charged out of (Y/N)’s apartment. Why hadn’t she texted him? 
Before he could overthink it more than he already had, he punched in a text and initiated the conversation.
Bucky Hey, doll. How was your day?
He stared at the screen of his phone, willing (Y/N) to reply. 
He watched the words go in and out of focus as he continued to observe the unchanging text thread. His right palm was beginning to sweat.
Several minutes passed before Bucky gave up and threw the phone to the bed. He tapped his fingers in a rhythm against his thighs to keep them occupied, only to find himself crossing his arms across his chest moments later. Seconds afterward, he uncrossed his arms, balling his hands into fists. He reached for the book on the nightstand, hoping for a distraction from the silence of his phone. 
He was inevitably waiting for a text he knew wasn’t coming. 
Bucky consciously tried to read the words on the page, but his mind kept drifting. (Y/N) was smart. She had obviously put two and two together, and she was currently composing a polite yet firm text dismissing him.
He couldn’t take it anymore. The silence was maddening!
He shoved the bookmark back in the book, tossed it on the nightstand roughly, and got up from the bed to start pacing. Periodically, his hands would find their way into his wet locks, tugging ever so slightly.
After what seemed like the twentieth circuit around the bedroom, a soft buzzing came from the mattress top. Bucky rushed toward the bed and retrieved the device. He clutched it to his heaving chest before exhaling loudly.
Moment of truth, he thought.
He raised the phone to see the screen.
(Y/N) Hey, sorry! I must’ve dozed off while taking my bath. 
(Y/N) Didn’t mean to leave you hanging!
A weight lifted from Bucky’s shoulders. She hadn’t purposely meant to ignore his text. He breathed a sigh of relief.
Bucky Don’t worry about it.
(Y/N) I guess I was more tired than I thought. 
Bucky Should I let you go?
(Y/N) No, no...I can chat.
Bucky So, how was your day?
(Y/N) It was good. The subway was on time this morning. Timmons wasn’t too much of a pain in the ass, even though we are in the middle of putting together a huge, new account. 
(Y/N) I had dinner with Robyn at Penelope to discuss centerpieces for the wedding. 
Bucky held his breath as he watched the ellipses blink on his phone. This is it. This is where (Y/N) let him down easy.
(Y/N) Then, I came home to a hot bath and a bottle of wine.
Bucky reread the last text three times before it sank in that (Y/N) hadn’t mentioned anything about running into him. Maybe it really was okay.
(Y/N) Oh, and I met my first Avenger today.
There it was. That’s what Bucky had been waiting for. Butterflies erupted in his stomach and flapped slowly up to his chest. His thumbs gracelessly typed out his message.
Bucky Oh, yeah? Who’d you meet?
Bucky tried to calm his breathing as he anticipated (Y/N)’s reply.
(Y/N) It is was something like Bunky or Borky. The one with the metal arm.
Borky?!
Bucky You mean Bucky?
(Y/N) Yup. Thats the one!
Bucky Well…???
(Y/N) He was absolutely adorkable! 
Bucky Adorkable? 🤔
What the hell does that even mean? Bucky wondered, gripping his phone a little tighter.
(Y/N) You know, adorable but dorky. Adorkable!
Bucky Oh.
(Y/N) He wouldn’t stop shaking my hand when my neighbor introduced us and he was just staring. he almost dropped my groceries all over the kitchen because he wouldn’t stop staring. 
Bucky Wait, your neighbor knows an Avenger?
(Y/N) Pssh! Im pretty sure hes an avenger too!
Bucky What?!?! 😳 Which one???
Bucky’s heart started galloping as he read (Y/N)’s words. Did she know about Parker?
(Y/N) hes obviously spiderman
Oh, shit! She did. 
Bucky How do you figure?
(Y/N) same height/build...ive listened to interviews with spiderman...sounds just like peter...he has an “internship” at stark industries...and i saw peter climbing up the side of our building once in the spiderman costume
(Y/N) spiderman is peter parker
(Y/N) dont tell anyone i told you though...its a secret
Bucky How much wine have you had, doll?
(Y/N) 1 or 2 glasses y?
Bucky chuckled at (Y/N)’s obliviousness. She was quite “adorkable” when she was drinking.
Bucky Your grammar has gone to shit, and you think your neighbor is Spider-Man.
(Y/N) grammar schwammer and he is
Bucky threw his head back in a full laugh. He was suddenly glad he took Steve’s advice and texted (Y/N). She really wasn’t bothered he’d made a fool of himself earlier. At least, not with a little wine in her.
(Y/N) Like borky, you should have seen borky barnes! he turned red as a tomato when he almost dropped my stuff...i think someone was smitten
Bucky’s stomach rolled when he noticed the subject change. She wasn’t going to let it go.
Bucky Can you blame him? I bet you’re cute as a button.
(Y/N) well obvi...i feel bad though...i kinda gave him a hard time for calling me ma’am...i regretted it the sec it happened...he kinda stormed out...i know i hurt his feelings
(Y/N) he was just being polite cuz you know- manners
Bucky What would you do if you saw him again?
Now was his chance to see where he stood. To know if he even had a fighting chance.
(Y/N) probably apologize profusely then ask him out for a cup of coffee
Bucky You’d ask him out for a cup of coffee?
(Y/N) y not? hes easy on the eyes and when those baby blues are locked on you-its hypnotizing
And just like that, Bucky knew he was back in the game.
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10:37 pm- later that night
Bucky Hey, dipshit. (Y/N) knows you’re Spider-Man.
Parker
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Chapter Four | Chapter Six (Part 1)
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forever-rogue · 4 years
Text
Afterglow - Part 6
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A/N: Honey Bee finally made the smartest decision of her life in the last chapter and now...time to deal with the fallout. Thank you guys for supporting and loving this story too! As always, feedback and comments are welcome, and if you’d like to be tagged, let me know. xx 💕
Pairing: Frankie Morales x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 6.5k
Warnings: None
AFTERGLOW MASTERLIST
MASTERLIST
»»————- ♡ ————-««
Spitting out the toothpaste into the sink, you groaned slightly when you realized that you had left your mouthwash back on your desk. Tilting your head under the tap, you got a mouthful of water and swished it around in your mouth, trying to get the last bits of toothpaste out.
When you were satisfied with the lackluster brushing, you quickly splashed some cold water onto your face to wake yourself up. But it was no use - you still looked as tired and dragged out as you felt. There were dark circles under your eyes, your lips were chapped and cracked, and the joy you normally held in your eyes was all but gone. You had been going through the motions for the last three, feeling more like an empty shell than anything else. 
But you felt liberated - free. More so than you had in a long time. That in itself made your current struggle worth it.
Grabbing your toothpaste, toothbrush, and hairbrush, you stalked out of the bathroom, ready to slink back to your office before anyone else arrived. 
Looking furtively around the hall, you walked the short distance to your own office, almost making it to safety when you heard your name being called softly. Groaning inwardly, you cleared your throat and turned around, plastering on the best smile you could.
"Ally," you said softly, "y-you're here early!"
"I was just thinking the same thing," she joked, and while you could tell she meant no harm, it still caused you to panic slightly. She was well aware of you calling off your engagement, hell the whole world seemed to know, but she never seemed to pity you for it. Her eyes flicked to the items in your hands as a warmth crept into your chest and blossomed over your whole face, "I'm meeting a client early this morning because it was the only thing that fit into his schedule. Are you..."
You remained silent for a moment, hanging your head before letting out a long sigh, "look, I've just been staying here since things ended with Chad. I'm trying to find my own place, but its been a bit of a difficult go. Turns that a lot of people don't want to rent to you if you happen to have supposedly wronged Chad Williams. It seems like everyone knows him."
She reached out and gave your shoulder a soft, reassuring squeeze. Meeting her eyes, you found a small smile on her face, luckily not one of pity, "I'm sorry he's making things miserable still. I'm guessing your parents are out of the question?"
"Absolutely not an option," you admitted with a stiff laugh, "my mom seemed okay at first but she and my father quickly came to the conclusion that I was in the wrong and making a horrible mistake. They insisted I was just going through a phase because of nerves. When I told them I was sure about my decision and wasn’t going back, they all but...disowned me. Imagine the shame I’ve brought upon them in their minds...they’re so old fashioned. Maybe they’ll come around one day.”
"Yikes," she said as you nodded, "can I be honest with you?"
"Of course."
"I never liked him," she admitted softly, causing you to almost give yourself whiplash as you looked over at her, "there was just something about him that was off. I think - I know, you can do so much better."
"Thank you," you said as you laughed lightly, trying to hold the tears that threatened to well up at bay, "I hope so too."
"I mean it," she insisted, "you're kind, smart, pretty, and you've got a good heart. What more could anyone ask for?"
"Apparently a dutiful, quiet little wife..."
"Very funny," she teased, "why don't you come and stay with us? While you get your own place? We've got an extra bedroom that's not being used, and it's much better than staying here. Have you been sleeping on your hard old couch?”
"Yes..."
"Absolutely not," she shook her head, "come over when you're done for the day. We'll get the room ready for you. Anna will be happy to see you again too. And you know what, it's not an option, its a demand. Just come over tonight and we'll get you settled. I'll have Anna pick up some wine for dinner and everything."
"Ally, you're much too kind..." you said as her phone stared to ring. She looked at the screen and a big smile spread across her visage as her wife's name popped up on the screen.
"Speak of the devil," she laughed lightly, "tonight! No if, ands, or buts!"
You could only nod as she walked away, chattering excitedly as she went to her own office. Before stepping in and closing the door, she gave you a grin and wave that was enough to cause a single tear to roll down your cheek. It had been weeks since anyone had even shown you an ounce of kindness; most people had decided to scorn you instead, blaming you for everything that had happened. Wiping the warm drop away, you stepped foot into your own office, stashing your toiletries away for what you hoped would be the last time. Hopefully that everything you'd finally be able to have a proper, long, hot shower and sleep in a bed, two luxuries that you had been greatly missing. 
Pulling out a dress from the small wardrobe, you slipped it on, vowing to stop your little pity party. Sure, things weren't ideal right now, but you were still so much better off than others. That was something you did not take for granted.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
“Men really can be the worst,” Anna laughed, almost snorting into her wine as you held up your glass in a mock salute, “can you imagine being that pathetic and trying to sabotage someone you supposedly loved? I think it speaks volumes to his character.”
“The longer we were together, the more I realized that it was never about love, even if that’s how it started out. It was always about appearances and trying to please everyone else. It was getting so tiring.”
“I can only imagine,” Ally gave her your leg a small pat as you downed the rest of your glass, “but at least you’re free now. It’s easy to fall  into routine and not realize how unhappy we’ve become. We get used to just staying on one path. Usually it takes something big to make us realize what we’re doing isn’t what we wanted in the first place.”
“Okay Dr. Ally,” Anna teased her wife, “we’re not at the office. But I agree...I am curious, and happy, as to what caused you to realize that you deserve more.”
You felt the blood draining from your face almost immediately as you swallowed nervously, mouth dry. You weren’t about to delve into the memories and dreams that had been plaguing you over the weeks, becoming increasingly more frequent the closer your former wedding date had approached. Frankly, you hadn’t even admitted that to yourself yet, not out loud anyway. 
How were you supposed to tell yourself, let anyone else, that the reason you realized you deserved was better because you’d been dreaming of your high school boyfriend again? It had been twenty years, twenty long years without him - there was no reason you should have even given him a second thought. Yet...here you were. Still hung up on Frankie Morales, the boy that had earned your heart...and then brought it into a million pieces. You knew, you would be the first to admit, that it wasn’t all his fault, that you were to blame to an extent as well, but it didn’t make it any easier.
Ever since the day that you had run into him again, a day that should have been like any other, he’d been living rent free in your mind. Even if you hated him, even if you were still mad at him after all this time. You couldn’t help but wonder - what if. What if. 
What if he had come to California with you and you’d both stayed there? What if you had waited for him while you went to school and he was in the military? What if he’d come back to you long ago? Would you still be together? Would you be married to him? Would  you have a daughter or son that took on both of your best qualities? Or would you have eventually fallen out and broken up anyway, only to loathe each with every fiber of your being? Would you have stayed together?”
What if. What if. What if. 
It was that haunted you for so long now.
“Umm,” you snapped back into reality and pushed the thought of the boy you had loved out of your mind. You set the glass back down and made a small, noncommittal sound, “it was just a lot of things. The more real things became with the wedding planning the more I realized that I didn’t want this. It was at my last dress fitting actually, that I realized I couldn’t do it.” 
“That must have been quite a wake up call,” Anna’s eyes widened as she imagined the scene as you nodded, taking the almost empty bottle of wine and pouring the remainder into your class. 
“It was,” you admitted with a long sigh, “you should have been the poor dress maker. I almost ran out on her. But you know, even though things are far from perfect right now, I would still do it all again.”
“Cheers to that,” Ally held up her class, and the two of you clinked yours against it, “now to bigger and better things. You can, and will, do so much better.”
“Thank you both,” just being in their presence, let alone their home, had you feeling infinitely better, “I don’t even know where to begin to thank you.”
“What are friends for?” 
“I, however, do have some more good news,” Anna was proud of herself as the two of your gave her an inquisitive look, “I spoke to my friend who is a realtor today, no connection to Chad or anything, and he said he has a perfect little house available! It’s a little on the outskirts of town, a small, quiet neighborhood, but that it would be perfect for you. It’s not big, just a little two bedroom, one bath, but it’s all been redone recently, and it’s quaint. He showed me some pictures and I think you’d really like it.”
“You did...you did this for me?” you felt another wave of tears sting at the back of your eyes as she nodded. 
“I’m not trying to push this on you at all, or anything of the sort,” she promised, “but we were talking and it just came up and I thought of you. I thought I’d just tell you in case you were interested...you are, of course, welcome to stay with us however long you want.”
“I can’t thank you enough,” you said softly, “truly. I’d love to see the place. If you like, I’m sure it’ll be great. And honestly, it would be nice to get out of the city and be a little bit out of the way and I don’t need anything much. I just want a place that will feel like home...my own place.”
“Obviously it comes with the stipulation that we will get to help decorate and pick out furniture if you move into it.”
“I would expect nothing less,” you agreed, “it’s going to be nice getting my own things and having it be truly mine.”
“A fresh start,” she agreed, “I’ll tell Elijah that we’ll stop by tomorrow and take a look? How does that sound?”
“Perfect,” you agreed, feeling your heart finally feel warm again, as a wave of calm washed over you, “absolutely perfect.”
»»————- ♡ ————-««
The next two weeks were a whirlwind of moving, although you technically didn’t have much to move, furniture shopping, unpacking, and organizing your new home. 
The house was cute, an older little home that had been recently renovated with a small yard and  a perfect spot for a garden. You could already picture yourself gardening once the cooler autumn and winter months were over. 
It wasn’t huge, but it had a spare bedroom you decided would serve as a home office and occasional guest room, although you figured you weren’t going to have many of those considering how easily everyone had cut you off. It was open, warm, and inviting, and it was perfect for what you wanted. It had brought up the idea of maybe adopting a dog or cat to keep as your friend. It had made you think of something that Frankie always said: anyone who wasn’t willing to share their home with an animal was as good as heartless.
It served as a sharp contrast to your former living situation; everything in the apartment you had shared with Chad had been cold, dark, and minimalistic. Nothing about it had ever felt truly homey, more like an ornate display at an art museum you were afraid to even look at. Chad had never wanted an animal of any sorts, not even a goldfish, claiming that it would take up too much time, too much space, and he just didn’t want something to take care of.
But your new home was the polar opposite, it was romantic and airy and filled with items and trinkets that made it feel like a home. A little animal friend would fit in perfectly. You were fitting in perfectly already. 
You’d even made it a point to go around the neighborhood and introduce yourself to people. Your justification was that you had literally nothing to lose, your family had turned their backs on you, your ex-fiance had taken almost all of the so called friends you’d had, and were left to your own devices. In the worst case scenario, you’d have met a few unsavory people, and in the best case scenario you’d get to know your neighbors and maybe make a few friends.
Something in the stars seemed to align, as your neighbors turned out to be kind and welcoming, and you were sure the cookies you offered them weren't a deterrent either. They were mostly either older couples, or small families, a few roommates that lived together. The normalcy of it all was endearing, and to know that you had a place that you were welcome was enough to let your heart rest easy. 
The only mystery that remained was your next door neighbor, the one on your left side. Whoever it was had been missing, gone or something, since you’d moved in several weeks before. While trying to maintain a respectful distance, you’d kept an eye on the house to see if you could spy anyone coming or going, see a car...something. But you never did - not even seen so much as a porch light flicker on. It seemed odd, especially in this neighborhood.
One afternoon, in the middle of unpacking the new bits of furniture for your living room and rearranging everything for about the tenth time, curiosity got the better of you. Maybe it was because you were in the middle of watching some true crime documentaries as you worked but you just felt...nervous. You were concerned about the health and safety of this mysterious neighbor that you hadn’t even met. You’d hastily wiped the sweat from your brow before rushing over to the neighbor on the other side of the seemingly nonexistent neighbor. 
Unfortunately, much to your chagrin, the other neighbor, an older widowed man by the name of Eddie, who happened to have an adorable dog that you decided you’d offer to take on walks, was just as clueless as you. 
He said he’d seen the man, at least you narrowed it down to that much, come on and go on occasion, but that he kept odd hours. He commented that he must have worked evenings or something, because he wasn’t around much at that time and it was always quiet during the day. Apparently it wasn’t odd for him to be gone for days at a time, or at least for no one to notice him. At least he’d be a quiet neighbor if he ever appeared again. But the older man hadn’t seemed too concerned, so figured there was nothing to worry about. You ended finding out that he was likely around your age, with dark hair. That was about all that Eddie knew; he said the man whose name he couldn’t even remember had always kept to himself since he’d moved in a few years ago. 
You’d thanked him, given the small fluffy dog a few pets and trudged back to your own place, arms filled with various baked goods, including a delicious smelling loaf of banana bread. Eddie had proudly declared that he had taken up the hobby of baking in his retirement and he always had been plenty to share. You made a mental note to store that little piece of info away for future use. 
And yet still, even as more days passed, you still didn’t see hide nor hair of the mystery man. You’d gone to work each morning, wondering if maybe you just missed him and you had conflicting schedules. You didn’t know why you even cared so much, or what drew you to solving this mystery, but you were just inexplicably invested. 
One evening, as you were watching some Netflix and unwinding with a glass of wine, browsing the adoptable animals at the local shelter, it hit you. It was like the proverbial lightbulb had been switched on and you came up with a brilliant idea. When you’d moved in, you’d taken some fresh, homemade cookies to everyone in the small cul-de-sac - why didn’t you just make some for him? 
It was brilliant, you thought to yourself as you set the wine glass down and almost tossed your laptop to the floor in excitement. You would make your favorite cookies, soft, gooey chocolate chip ones you fancied so much, get them all safely in a container and drop them off when you felt for work in the morning. If they were gone by the time you came home that would mean he had to have been there. 
Yes, you thought to yourself, this is brilliant. No one could turn down a plate of fresh cookies. 
So you’d spent the rest of the evening, bouncing around the kitchen excitedly, pouring your heart and soul into the every little step it took to make the perfect treat. By the time you’d gone to bed, excited and worn out, the little package was sitting on your counter for your to grab on your way out. This was going to be it, you just knew it.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
You woke up early the next morning, even before your alarm went off, a smile on your face despite being tired. You almost stopped dead in your tracks when you realized that this was the first, the first time in what felt like a small eternity that you woke up like that. It was a good feeling, and you hoped that you would be able to hang onto it. 
Once you’d showered and done up your makeup and hair to your liking, you slipped on a pretty golden dress. It always made you feel pretty, the color bringing a slight bit of joy into your heart. You always felt confident and good in it, and you decided it was just what you needed. If your last session ended early enough, you even planned on stopping by the animal shelter to see if you made a connection with any of the adoptable animals. It was going to be a good day. You could feel it in your bones. 
Once you were ready to go, you grabbed your pre-packed lunch from the fridge, along with your purse and the package for your mystery neighbor. Almost flouncing over to his porch because you were buzzing with energy, you hopped up the steps and set it on the front porch and center, in the middle of the doormat, topped off with a handwritten note introducing yourself. The mat was a generic one, and you did a little look around to see if you could find a name or any personal touches around the porch. But there was nothing - no clue as to who it could be. It was no matter, you told yourself, you would have your answers soon enough.
Giving the neatly wrapped container one last fond look, you headed to your car and off to work. Hopefully you’d be busy enough to keep your mind occupied. It was silly to get so invested in something so trivial and yet...here you were. An eternal dreamer and optimist at heart, just like you always had been, even as a teenager. Even if you had to suppress that side of yourself for some time, more so with each passing year, you were still the same girl underneath it all. 
The day felt like it had like it went by in a blur as you saw several of your regular patients, feeling like you were finally able to help them properly and give them your undivided attention. It went so well that you did manage to finish up early, which meant  you could have your fun and go look at animals. You knew it would be a challenge to meet different pets and not be able to take them all home, but you were willing to give it the old college try. 
You hadn’t bothered to stop home and change, opting to go straight to the shelter.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
As soon as you'd gotten there and started looking at the different dogs, you knew it would be hard. 
So many of the sweet dogs came up to you, some wagging their tails in nervous excitement, some just beside themselves, but others were more reluctant, sitting and observing you. You went up to as many as you could, keeping a respectful distance from them and offering them your hand to sniff. A couple of them give you a few licks, letting you reach in and pet them, but getting distracted as soon as they spied other people. Sweet dogs, all of them, but those weren’t the ones for you. As you walked through the various dogs, you were disheartened to find that you didn’t seem to have a connection to any of them. You hoped they would go to good homes soon regardless. Maybe it wasn’t your day to find a companion, which was totally okay with you. You’d just come back some other day and make sure that one of them got a home in your adobe.
But as you neared the end of the last row, you stopped when you spotted a small dog, small for being a pitbull that was, sitting in the corner of her kennel, a sad, dejected look on her face. She was a pretty thing, light tan with white marking on her sweet face, but her eyes contained a deep sadness.
“Hi, sweet girl,” you said softly as you didn’t even hesitate to drop to your knees, dropping on the floor of the kennel, sliding a few fingers under the barrier keeping you from her, trying to coax her to you. She observed you with keen interest, but remained rooted in her spot, “you are so pretty! I bet you’re just as sweet too, aren’t you? I can tell…”
“She’s very sweet,” one of the shelter’s volunteers, a young boy by the name of Lucas that had let you in, said as he walked up to you, “but she’s really shy. She’s less than a year old, but she’s already had a go of it.”
“What happened to her?” you asked gently, keeping your voice down so you wouldn’t startle her, “she looks so sad.”
“She was abused by her former owner, sadly. They found her when they went to raid the owner’s home, apparently he was a small time drug dealer on top of it,” he explained and you made a small in the back of your throat as you just looked at her. It made your heart break to know that this poor animal, and so many others like her, were being abused for no reason - not that anyone, person or animal, should ever have been abused, “it’s made her shy, but she does warm up to people.”
“What’s her name?” you asked as she moved ever so marginally closer to you. You smiled at her, giving her an encouraging little nod.
“Daisy.”
“Daisy,” you called softly as her ears perked up slightly. It suited her, you decided, a soft pretty name for a pretty girl, “hi sweet Daisy. You are a big lovebug underneath it all, aren’t you?”
She turned her slightly to look at as you offered her a small, reassuring nod. 
“How about Miss Daisy Mae?” you asked her and you got a glimpse of her tail wagging ever so slightly, “yeah, I think that’s perfect too. May I pet you?”
It was silent, completely so sans for the other dogs in their kennels as you attempted to gain her trust. You didn’t want to scare her off, but you wanted to see if you could get her to come closer. Lucas told you could stay as long as you wanted, and you decided that you would do just that, plopping onto your bottom as you gently spoke to her. You spent some time sitting there, talking to her about anything and everything, and slowly, inch by precious inch, she came closer to you until she was just a few inches from your hand. When you moved your hand and she didn’t flinch, you gently petted her muzzle, tracing over it delicately with a few fingers. 
“You’ve been through a lot,” you mused quietly and she gently rubbed her head into your hand, “but you’ve got so much life left to live. So many happy things to come. Would you like to come home with me and see? I have a big bed that I have all to myself, and I could really use a companion to take up some of the space. Would you like to help me?”
She made a small sound as she looked up at you, her tail wagging ever so slightly. That was enough to convince you that you were making the right decision. Giving Daisy one last gentle touch, you slowly pulled your hand back to keep from startling her and jumped to your feet. She was yours, it hadn’t taken much to figure that out, and you were going to make sure she came home with you. 
Telling her you would be back in a little bit, you went off in search of Lucas, to tell him to get you all the paperwork so you could bring her home with that day.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
As soon as Daisy was all yours, you’d set her up in your car, draping a big, soft blanket over the backseat for her. You were glad you kept one in your car for whatever occasion called for it; this was the perfect time. As soon as she seemed to realize what was happening, Daisy’s eyes had lit up and she already seemed like a different dog, her tail going softly, but nonstop as she stayed close to your side. 
You’d stopped by the pet store on your way home, bringing her in with you as you stocked up on the best dog food, treats, several big fluffy beds (one for each room of the house naturally), and let her pick out several toys. Whatever she wanted she got, honestly, and before you knew it before pushing a huge cartful to the counter to the pay. Daisy, now in a pretty yellow collar and leash, followed closely by your side, a little stuffed bear in her mouth. This felt so right, so natural, almost like you had meant to find her. You couldn’t even remember the last time you had felt this much joy in your heart, and you hoped the feeling would never go away.
“And this is where we live,” you told her as you pulled into the driveway, pulling up to the garage and turning off the car. She stood up and went to the window, looking out eagerly. Your break broke a little when you realize she probably never got to run and play like any puppy should, but you vowed to change that. You got and opened the door, not even bothering to stop her as she jumped out and started to sniff everywhere. 
Sighing contentedly at the sight of the happy dog, the one that had quickly turned from nervous to optimistic, you started to gather everything out of the car to bring inside. Daisy came back to your side, following you with keen attention as you opened the door to the house and let her explore. 
It wasn’t until your last excursion to the car to bring in the last of the toys, that your attention wandered back to your MIA neighbor. When you studied his house, you noticed that all the lights were off, and there was no car in the driveway. The package you had you left for him was still right where you had placed that morning. A small, dejected sigh left your lips as you quickly dashed over and retrieved the package. It was only slightly heartbreaking,  but you knew it wasn’t due to any fault of yours. But still...you couldn’t help but wonder. Who was he? Where was he? Maybe one day your questions would be answered, but at least for now you had your new friend to keep you company. Just as you thought about her, you heard a small, almost tiny bark from your door as Daisy poked her head out and looked excitedly at you.
“Coming sweet girl!” you promised her as you ran back over to her. This day was decidedly not a waste in the slightest, you reminded yourself, you had a new friend and that was more important than anything else.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
Several more days passed, and Daisy adjusted to life with you without a hitch. She really was the sweetest girl you had met, and she had won a big spot in your heart, and bed, almost instantly. Gone were the cookies you had baked for the neighbor you thought might not actually exist, eaten with some milk as you watched Netflix late into the evening with Daisy snoozing next to you. 
Something though, whatever little stubborn streak you had, told you to keep trying.
So you did.
That night you dragged yourself back to the kitchen and repeated the painstaking process of making your now neighborhood famous cookies again. He was going to get these cookies come hell or high water. This time Daisy joined you in the kitchen and watched your every move intently, as you walked her through the process, giving her your best impression of some lofty Food Network chef. 
Just as you had previously done earlier in the week, you prepped everything and stuck the same note on the top, making sure it looked perfect. Even if it ended up as another batch that you would eat, you wanted to go through the efforts and ensure it was perfect. 
The next morning, you herded Daisy into the car, allowing her to come to your office with you. She had been enjoying coming to your office and greeting your clients, being a good girl and laying on her bed while you worked. Many of them seemed to find her comforting, and as thought she could sense when they needed something, which she probably did, she’d often go to comfort them with wet kisses and nuzzles. Ally had suggested that you look into her having certified as a therapy dog, which you decided was a perfect idea. 
You wandered over to his porch and left the little package again and turned to head off to work. Whatever was meant to happen would happen. So if he didn’t come and get the cookies, so be it. You’d stop worrying about it and let it go. 
When you got home that evening, you brought everything inside and let Daisy into the backyard to roam around before her dinner time, when you looked through the front windows to try and see your neighbor’s porch. You huffed when you came to the conclusion that you were at just the wrong angle to be able to see anything. Stalking out the front door to get a better look, you sighed deeply when the package was once again there. What had you really expected? You’d struck out for weeks now, the man was an enigma to yourself and everyone else around, it was a far cry that you’d ever really see him. 
Grumbling at yourself for being too hopeful and optimistic, you trudged over to his porch, ready to take the cookies back again and enjoy them for yourself. Maybe you could bring them, and Daisy, over to Eddie and see if he would enjoy them and the dogs would get along. It wasn’t terribly exciting, but it was something anyway.
You bent down to pick up the small container, ready to head back home and get on with your day. But just as you swooped up the container, you heard the door unlock, causing you to jump back in surprise, dropping the container and letting it clatter to the ground. You took a step back and looked up, finding the door open, but the screen closed. Squinting your eyes, you tried to make out the person on the other side but found it almost impossible. 
“H-hi,” you stammered nervously, hoping the person wouldn’t think you were stealing or snooping around, “I-I moved into the neighborhood a few weeks ago, and I was just...I made cookies! I was going to introduce myself but I hadn’t seen you or anything, so I figured I’d leave them for you. They-they’re not old though, I made this batch last night.”
Nothing but silence met your ears for several moments as you nervously picked up the container to display it for him. You were nervous suddenly, terrified that you had somehow offended him, or...something.
“I-I’ll get going,” you said as you set the cookies on the bench that was near the door. Unsure why you felt the need to keep speaking you gave him your name, letting it linger in the air for a moment, “I live right next door, so I guess maybe I will see you around. Yeah...well, umm...goodbye!”
But before you made it off the porch, you heard the screen door open, and swing shut. You swallowed the lump in your throat, ready to turn around and make a proper introduction when you heard your name whispered so quietly, that you thought you might have imagined it. That voice...that soft, gentle voice caused your heart to skip a few beats. You knew that voice. 
Turning around slowly, you came face to face with the man that had been on your mind for weeks. You brought your eyes up to the man’s face and a small gasp of surprise left your lips. 
“F-Frankie?” except this wasn’t the Frankie you’d known. No, this man was tired looking, nothing but sheer exhaustion on his face, dark circles, parched lips, no trace of facial hair, his hair flattened from what you knew was a signature hat. This was a different man, a world weary man, a man who you never intended on seeing again. But you knew that voice, you knew it so well, you’d recognize it anywhere, even after all this time. But there was something about him, how he was looking at you that broke our heart. 
He remained silent as his dark eyes watched you, wondering how and why on earth you’d ended up as his neighbor. It was like some force was at play, some weird thing that kept bringing the two of you together. 
He remained silent as the two of you looked at each other, his eyes quickly flicked to your left hand. You straightened up when you noticed that and got ready to walk away, unsure of how to feel in that moment. Once again, your life was thrown in a complete tailspin. 
You swallowed the lump in your throat, unable to find any words. 
But before you could leave his porch, his hand went to your wrist, taking it gently in his large hand as you immediately turned around and gave him a wide eyed stare.
Your chest was rising and falling rapidly as you looked at him in silent question, and he did the same. 
This was Frankie - your Frankie. After all these years, he was still yours.
Before either of you could say anything, he gently grabbed your face and studied it for a moment before crashing his lips onto yours. It took a moment for you to react, and for a few beats before you kissed him back, not even having to think about it. But just as quickly as it had started you came to your senses and while part of you was screaming to continue to kiss him, the logical part of your brain took over and you pushed him away from you. Immediately realizing what you were doing, he let go of you and took a step back. 
“Don’t,” you insisted sharply, your voice crackling on the singular word, “don’t. You don’t get to do that. I shouldn’t have done that. Not anymore. Never again.”
Before he could say anything, you dashed away from him, running back over to your house. This had to be some sort of weird dream, surely life couldn’t be throwing another challenge at you. Surely you’d been through enough.
Surely you weren’t neighbors, after all this time and years, with Frankie Morales. 
Life couldn’t be that cruel...right?
»»————- ♡ ————-««
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373 notes · View notes
plus-size-reader · 4 years
Text
Spin the Bottle
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Shawn Hunter x Plus size!reader
Word Count: 1876 words
Warnings: none 
Summary: Cory’s twin sister has a huge crush on Shawn, and gets suckered into admitting it at a party
Part 2
——————————————————————————————————
You had never really been into parties as a general rule.
You didn’t like all the strangers and all the pressure to be something that you weren’t. It just wasn’t your scene, and frankly, it was never going to be. You and your brother had always been losers, outsiders to the popular crowd
...but you had been invited to this party by Shawn Hunter.
Which meant that you had to go.
Shawn had been your brother’s best friend since you were children, and that meant that he had been in your life for as long as you could remember.
Honestly, it had been so long that you could hardly even remember a time before him.
He was all you’d ever had that was even close to a friend outside of your brother, and it was only a matter of time before the feelings you had for Shawn morphed into something else.
It was a classic highschool trope, falling for your brother’s best friend but you just couldn’t help yourself. Shawn was calm, cool and collected all the time.
Anyone in their right mind would be completely head over heels for him, and by the time you were in high school, you had the biggest crush on him that you were sure anyone ever had.
Still, the worst part of the whole thing was that you had to keep it a secret.
If Cory ever found out, you would never hear the end of it. You knew that, and you were also one hundred percent sure that Shawn would never share your feelings.
You knew him too well to ever live under the illusion that he would.
Shawn had dated plenty of girls, different kinds of girls, from all walks of life but never anyone that looked like you. Every girl he’d ever been attracted to was a size two at the most and you just weren’t.
You never had been, and you doubted that you ever would be, so you made a point to keep your crush all hidden away.
It was your biggest secret, and you were absolutely positive that it would never see the light of day. It was just better for everyone that no one ever found out about it.
Or at least, they never should have.
You did as good a job at keeping it hidden as possible but still, the truth always found a way to come out into the open. It was bound to happen at some point.
...And apparently, that day was today.
You arrived at the party with both males, to find the room crowded, and full to the brim with people but you were only focused on a single corner of it, the corner you were in.
Everything else was far too overwhelming to pay attention to.
Really, you were just waiting for the entire thing to end so that you could go home but just when you thought the night was wrapping up, you were proven wrong again.
From where he was standing, in the middle of a huge crowd of people, Shawn had insisted on beginning a game of spin the bottle.
It was a terrible idea really.
You had never liked that game.
It felt like a stupid excuse to humiliate other people for no reason other than the fact that you could, fueled completely by peer pressure and a desire to fit in.
However, even knowing that, you chose to partake anyway. You couldn’t help yourself where Shawn was involved.
It was pathetic and you didn’t need anyone to tell you that to come to terms with it. You knew that it was ridiculous and you would never live it down if anyone found out.
You just didn’t care.
“Who wants to go first?” he called, looking between every single person who had sat down in the circle around him, doing their very best to avoid his focused gaze.
Even the most confident girls fiddled nervously with their fingers, doing anything they could to keep from looking him directly in the face.
That was just the effect Shawn seemed to have on everyone he was around and you were, in no way, immune to the feeling. You wanted to volunteer, of course, but knew better.
If Shawn focused his attention on you for more than a few moments at a time, there was no telling how you would react. With this many people around, everyone was bound to take notice.  
Still, after a few rounds, as the game continued, everyone grew more and more relaxed with one another, as did the bottle spinning.
Every part of this was nearly enough to give you a panic attack but when your turn finally did roll around, you tried to just keep your head down until it was over.
That came, of course, but not in the way you would have expected.
You reached out to grasp the bottle by the neck, giving it a hefty spin. You couldn’t even bother to look at it as it came to a stop, not willing to endure the embarrassment.
Frankly, you would have been more willing to crawl into a hole than to do this at all.
Though, just when you were sure it couldn’t have gotten worse, you looked up to find Shawn standing there, offering a hand to you. You took it, out of habit, but couldn’t really think past that.
The group of teens around you hooted and hollered as you stood from where you’d been sitting, trying to fade from this plain of existence.
This was fun for them.
Part of you wondered what he was thinking, wondered why he didn’t just refuse, moving on to the next player. It would have been easier than having to submit himself to any kind of ridicule.
Still, Shawn didn’t even seem to bat an eye at their teasing.
Not that you had much time to process that before you found yourself locked within the close confines of the hall closet, the muffled laughter still audible.
That part was added later in the game with some of the players suggesting it would be much more fun to morph the current game with seven minutes in heaven.
An even worse idea than before.
Though, even you had to admit that you were kind of glad for the privacy now. At least if Shawn was going to reject you completely, he wouldn’t do it in front of everyone you knew.
“You okay kid? I’m not gonna bite ya” Shawn teased, closing the door behind your two bodies, yanking the string to turn on the light slightly after.
You nearly retched at that terrible nickname.
It was the same thing he’d been calling you since elementary school, when it had been cute. Now that you were nearly adults, it almost felt like an insult.
You didn’t need any more reminders that Shawn didn’t see you as a dateable girl. You needed to just accept that, to him, you were never going to be more than his best friend’s sister.
“How long do you want to stand here before we can go back out?” you asked, not even operating under the illusion that he would actually want to do anything here with you.
As far as you knew, you were just going to stand here for a few minutes then you were going to go home as quickly as you could.
All you could hope for was the chance to dodge the comments on your way to the car. Those jerks were going to eat this whole thing up and you would likely never live it down.
Now, from where he was standing, Shawn was admittedly shocked.
That wasn’t the reaction he’d been hoping for.
“Geez, not even a little humor?” he teased, knitting his eyebrows together, though his lips tugged into a smile. This was just a big joke to him, or so it seemed.
You should have seen this coming.
“Did you set this up? Is this some kind of joke?” you asked, briefly considering that Shawn could have done this all for a laugh, though you didn’t think he would.
At this point, you couldn’t put that past anyone.
“Wow. What are you talking about?” he asked, all signs of that smile now gone. Up until now, he thought you were playing along with him but in that moment, that fell away.
You seemed really upset.
“What is going on? Did something happen?”
Those words came a moment later, when you didn’t answer his first question. You knew that he was worried about you, and that it was all coming from a good place but you were already too far gone to stop now.
You couldn’t just grin and bare your way out of this.
At this point, you had been doing that for too long.
“No Shawn, nothing happened and it’s never going to. I’m never going to be hot and athletic like Jennifer Bassett or exciting like Dana Pruitt” you sighed, burying your face in your hands as you spoke.
You were humiliating yourself, and it was all for nothing. Shawn didn’t even know what you were talking about.
“What? Why would you want to be?” he questioned, wracking his brain in a desperate attempt to figure out where you were going with this.
He hadn’t thought about either of them in quite some time but clearly, you hadn’t given yourself that same luxury. You had something going on, and he was going to figure it out.
No matter how long it took or how stupid he made himself look in the process.
“God! Because they’re perfect and that was why you liked them so much. I can’t be like that, and that’s why-” you scoffed, leaning down against the door until you came to rest on the floor, your words fading away the longer you went.
If you had let what you were about to say slip, nothing would ever be able to take it back.
...And Shawn seemed to realize that too.
“Why what?” he hummed, kneeling down beside you, his hand gingerly falling on your chin in a desperate attempt to get you to look at him.
You were doing that thing Cory always did, pretending like you could keep it all in though it was only a matter of minutes before you burst and told him the truth.
“Come on Kid, just tell me what’s going on. Please”
You wanted to smack that gentle, supportive man in his face for sitting there, acting like he actually cared about you but you couldn't.
You couldn’t, because he was really just gentle and supportive.
“Why you could never like me like that” you muttered, swallowing thickly as soon as those words left your lips. It was killing you, this whole thing, and you nearly cried at the thought of it.
...But you knew that would do no good.
You had made peace with the truth a long time ago, but something about tonight put a chip in that wall you’d built and it was just getting harder to cover it up.
Not that it would matter much after this.
Shawn would probably never speak to you again after this and you couldn’t blame him.
378 notes · View notes
booksforevermore13 · 3 years
Text
Marry Me?
Summary: It's been a few years since the Wizarding War and Harry and Ginny are still very much in love with each other. Harry proposes to Ginny, who doesn't take it very well. Little does he know that Ginny's still troubled by her monsters.
Read it on Fanfiction if you prefer!
...
Snow rested upon the park bench as if it were a feather cushion, soft and warm. It covered the rich deep wood in perfect white, and the newly clothed trees rose as wintry fairytale beings in that pristine landscape.
Ginny shivered, gently brushing the snow off from the bench, beckoning Harry to join her.
Harry shook his head and chuckled nervously. He'd been doing that quite often today, Ginny had observed, and while she had been curious at first, she had later ruled it out as simply Harry being Harry.
She shivered again rubbing her hands as she tried to get some warmth back to her body. True, she had a sweater and a coat on but in the chilly winters of Scotland, a two flimsy layers were not enough. If she had known they were coming there, then she would have worn more. Or better yet, not come at all.
Ginny blew on her fingers, trying to warm them up as Harry wordlessly shrugged off his jacket and stepped forward, wrapping it around her.
"What are you doing?" she demanded, taking the jacket off. "You'll be cold."
"No, I won't. You've nothing on, Gin."
"I'm wearing a sweater and a coat. Don't be an idiot, Harry, take the damn jacket," she urged.
But Harry had that stubborn glint in his eyes, so Ginny huffed in defeat, though she was secretly grateful for another thing to wear.
"Why Scotland?" she asked, a few seconds later. "And why aren't you sitting?"
Harry chuckled again, that same nervous chuckle and Ginny's heart clenched in suspicion.
"Are you breaking it off with me?" she asked, her voice stronger than she felt. If he'd brought her all the way to Scotland to simply tell her that they were over, then frankly she'd … well she'd probably yell.
Harry frowned, and then hid eyebrows contorted in confusion.
"What? No!" he exclaimed. "That's not the reason. Why would I…" He shook his head then reached into his pocket, slowly bringing out a small box.
Ginny breath caught in her throat as a humourless chuckle left her lips.
This couldn't be happening.
She hastily got up, Harry's jacket falling off her shoulders. Her heart hammered against her chest, leaving her breathless.
Harry scrabbled, bending down before stumbling as he almost fell face-first into the snow.
"Heh," he chuckled, "This-I-I'll just stand up."
In other circumstances she'd have laughed but her throat constricted as Harry got up on his feet and smiled at her, before opening the box.
Inside, there was a small silver ring, resting upon blue leather, and engraved with vines running across its length. It was beautiful. It was utterly and completely beautiful. If Ginny had seen it in a shop window, she'd have stopped and marveled at it. Now, however, the ring brought dread, and she could feel the panic threaten to overcome her.
She looked at Harry and spotted the hopeful glint in his eyes as he smiled brightly.
"I think you know where this is going," he said. "Ginevra Molly Weasley, you are my love," his voice broke, "my life, the one person who has been by my side through times, good and bad. You are, frankly speaking, my everything and I am so lucky to call you... mine. Will you-will you marry me?"
Ginny felt her eyes tearing up. Her throat closed and she panicked, stepping backwards as her mind floated most involuntarily to what he had said.
Ginny struggled to catch her breath as she saw Harry smile fall, concern replacing his smile.
The world was getting abnormally blurry.
It was closing up, it was suffocating and Ginny felt her mind wander over to the first place she could think of, willing all her strength to Apparate.
Home.
...
She landed in a small clearing near her house, her feet buckling as her knees collided with the muddy ground. Her hands reached forward to support herself, and she retched violently, tears of exertion leaking out of her eyes.
A few acres away, she could see the smoke coming out of the chimneys. Her mother's burgundy dress had been hung out to dry and was just clinging to the line, as the chilly winter wind blew through their garden.
Ginny coughed, brushing away the dirt on her fingers. All she could think about was Harry's expectant face, and his huge smile, and all she could register was how badly she had disappointed him.
The thought made her want to heave again, but she refrained, instead choosing to turn away from her house. Even the Burrow seemed to stir dread in her, because all it suddenly reminded her of was the days she had spent locked in her room thinking about him.
"You were foolish to think I'd ever be a friend to the likes of you," he had said, while Ginny whimpered at his feet.
"Pathetic," he had spat then and she had winced at the menacing snarl on her face.
Ginny closed her eyes, bile rising up her throat at the memory of her lying on the cold, wet floor of the Chamber.
"I trusted you, you monster!" she had cried out, "I thought you were my friend. That you understood me. I told you everything!"
"Which only confirmed that you were a despicable wretch," he had laughed cruelly, and forced her chin upwards, as his nails dug into her skin. "Fancying Harry Potter, as if! Even he has standards enough to never bow down to scum like you!"
He had smirked and watched in evident glee as Ginny sobbed, utterly ashamed of what she had done.
"I wouldn't be so sure though," he had added as an afterthought. "Him being the fool he is, there's no guarantee he won't start inclining towards you."
A few tears fell, and Ginny rubbed at them furiously, her mud-caked fingers leaving streaks of dirt on her cheeks.
"But it would all be temporary."
"Ginny?"
Her eyes snapped open as she whirled around, the voice foreign to the one from her memory. Her eyes widened as she saw her youngest brother standing opposite her, concern etched on his face.
"Ron?" she questioned, as she wiped the dirt off of her face with the sleeve of her coat.
"What happened, why are you crying?"
"I'm not," she said hurriedly. "What-what are you doing here?"
"I saw you standing out here alone," he answered, "and don't give me that bull, why have you been crying?"
"I was not," Ginny said fiercely.
A smirk passed on Ron's face, which slowly grew into an impish grin. "Did he ask?" he said, a knowing expression on his face.
"How'd you know?"
"I'm his best friend, of course I know. What did you say?" he asked excitedly, almost jumping from one foot to another.
She stared at Ron for a few minutes, before bursting out crying.
Ron looked at her in alarm before stepping forward. "Ginny, bloody hell!" he exclaimed, pulling her into a hug. "What-wh-did he do something? What's wrong?:
"Nothing," Ginny managed between sobs. "I ran away."
"What?" Ron yelled, "You ran—what, why the bloody hell did you do that?"
Ginny's sobs grew louder as she clutched at Ron's shirt, and his grip around her grew stronger.
"I'm sorry!" he exclaimed, panicked. "Ginny, talk to me, please. What happened?"
"I panicked, and I-I... I didn't know what to do, so I Apparated here."
She could feel Ron frowning, and knew it was a shock for him, seeing her cry like this. She knew he'd expected something more joyous.
"Gin," he urged. "Ginny, why'd you run?" he asked, keeping his voice level as best he could. Ginny knew he was at his wit's end, for after years and years of her being the one he had turned to in times of distress, the roles had reversed and he was helpless.
She looked up at him hesitantly, through watery eyes, half-expecting a confused look she so fondly identified with him. Ron wouldn't understand; this was not his forte.
What was not expecting was gentle eyes and as she looked up at him, she realized, not for the first time that somewhere along the way, he had grown up too.
But she just couldn't get herself to say it.
"I don't want to marry him," she choked out finally. "I can't."
Ron frowned, hiding his confusion extremely well. "You don't want to marry Harry Potter," he repeated, more as if convincing himself. "Why?"
"I," she sighed. "I just can't. I... don't want to."
"You don't want to marry him?" he asked incredulously. "Ginny, you do realize that this is the same man you've been in love with for years?"
"I just don't know, Ron," Ginny groaned. "I panicked, and I overreacted, and I-I just fled from the scene."
Ron stared at her for a few minutes, his brows creased in a frown before he hugged her again. Hugging always worked, Ginny had told him herself. Most of the time. She didn't think he'd take her advice so seriously.
"You're... allowed to overreact," he said, carefully choosing his words. "This is a decision that can affect your entire life, so if anything, you can cry a bit more. Anything that will help."
He winced as Ginny let out a watery sob, and more tears flooded her cheeks.
"You're, you're-you've grown up," he continued, his voice becoming softer, "And I never realized it, I think. But you were always wiser than me, always the one more practical, and somewhere along the way, I realized I looked unto you more than you or I will ever admit."
"Whatever you decide, believe that it is right, for I'll be standing beside you."
Ginny tensed, his words setting in her.
What she was deciding now was not right, she knew that but Ginny would not tell him that.
She couldn't.
...
They had gone inside after her talk with Ron, and her mum had almost cried seeing her. It had been two months since she had last visited, and her mum had immediately bombarded her with questions, just barely held back by her dad.
She had held on quite well before she saw Harry at the door.
Everything had gone downhill since.
While her mum amicably chatted with Harry, his gaze never left her, his green eyes piercing into her face. It was not long before she cracked and immediately excused herself, choosing to go into the fields instead of the recluse of her old room.
She couldn't handle the memories her room brought up. None of them were good enough, at least, none of them were good enough to overlook the bad ones.
She heard the small pattering of footsteps behind her and felt her throat closing in panic. There was only one person who would come after her right now, and it was the last person she wanted to see.
"You ran away," Harry said, his voice barely audible over the whistling of the wind.
Ginny turned around and stared at him, her face devoid of emotion for the first time that day.
"Why?" his voice cracked, but there was a touch of desperation in his voice.
"I don't know," she whispered.
"That's not a good enough answer," he said angrily. "Why did you run away, Gin?"
Ginny stayed quiet, her red hair whipping in the wind. It slashed across her face, pricking against her eyes, but she couldn't get herself to care.
"Is it too early?" Harry spoke over the wind. "Did I do something wrong?"
No, she wanted to yell. He had done everything right. She was the problem and she couldn't be more disgusted with herself. It was impossible to measure how much she loved him, yet now that the time had come to express her feelings, she was coming up with nothing.
Ginny felt the seconds ticking away as she looked at the ground, the white of the snow contrasting against the brown of her boots. She heard footsteps coming over to her and felt a hand resting against her own as Harry lifted her chin and forced her eyes to meet his.
Ginny gasped at the anger-laden sorrow in his eyes, and she pulled back, trying to get away from his piercing gaze.
"Don't run," Harry warned, as Ginny continued pulling. "For Merlin's sake, don't run!" he yelled.
She stopped in her tracks, a tear spilling from her eye.
"I deserve an answer, Gin, please," he begged. "Why?"
A choked sob broke through, and Ginny pushed Harry with all her strength, making him let go of her.
"This won't last," she choked out. "This is temporary, this is not permanent, he told me this wouldn't last!"
The whistle of the wind had become more pronounced, and it whipped around them, numbing the tips of her fingers.
"Who told you?" Harry pressed on. "Goddamnit, Gin, who told you that?"
"Him."
It was her voice that sent Harry recoiling, but in that briefest second possible, he knew exactly who she was talking about.
"Riddle," he whispered. "Shit, Gin—"
"There's nothing to talk about," Ginny said. "I can't do this, Harry."
The anger was back now. Harry stepped forward, his fingers wrapping around her forearm to keep her in place.
"Do you realize we've never talked about him, Gin? Never talked about that year?" he said, his voice dangerously low.
"We have, of course we have."
"Once," Harry's voice cracked, "when you yelled at me in my fifth year for not asking you how it felt like to get possessed by Voldemort. But that doesn't even…." he broke off, his eyes glistening with unshed tears.
Ginny couldn't bear to look at him. So she didn't, instead gazing away at the leafless trees, whose boughs weighed down due to the weight of the snow.
"For two years after, you listened to everything I had to vent about. But not once did you ever talk about him."
"Riddle has nothing to do with this, Harry!" Ginny cried out. "It doesn't matter what he said to me, it's what I choose to believe—"
"Doesn't matter?" Harry bellowed, grabbing her arm. "It matters, Gin, because after all these years, it's still influencing what you do!"
"Riddle has nothing to do with anything in my life!" Ginny yelled, pulling her hand away.
Harry let go of it, his green eyes, following her erratic breathing and her frenzied steps. "Do you know what he said to me in the Chamber?" he said quietly. "He told me how you poured your heart out to him. He bloody quoted you. That's right, he recited word to word whatever you had written in that damn diary."
"No," Ginny said. "No."
"Have you ever wondered why you're so scared of things lasting? How you always run away when it comes to me?"
"Stop, Harry, please," Ginny begged. "Please, just stop."
"Because I've let you in. I've let you solve all my problems, but when it comes to you, I'm helpless."
The wind whipped around, cold and unrelenting, blowing up billows of snow. Ginny closed her eyes, the cold of the wind creeping along her bones as she shivered, her hands wrapping around her stomach.
After a while, that seemed like ages, Ginny found herself being pushed gently towards the shed, Harry's hand on the small of her back as she stepped inside the building, welcoming the warmth of the place.
It was another few minutes before Ginny let herself look at Harry, her heart tugging as she saw his pained expression. His green eyes were still stuck on her, unmoving, and as brown met green, she realized just how torn he was over this.
"I'm sorry," she found herself whispering. "I'm so sorry."
Harry reached forward, his arms wrapping around hers and bringing her closer, until her head was under the crook of his neck and she was safely enveloped in his embrace.
"I'm just scared," she continued, in that same small voice she'd be ashamed to use in front of anyone else. But with Harry, it seemed, her guards melted away until she was her vulnerable self, her heart completely belonging to him.
"When I woke up in the Chamber and saw you," she said, "part of me was relieved and part of me was just vying the time until I'd become just Ron's little sister again. Stupid, I know."
"No," Harry said. "Don't ever say that."
Ginny looked up at him and braced herself for the words she'd say next. She'd never admitted it to anyone before, in fear she'd be shunned away for being too petty.
"The first time, I entered Hogwarts, I was known as the Weasleys' little sister, second time I entered, I was the helpless girl taken into the Chamber. The years after that," Ginny's voice broke, "I did everything I could to prove them wrong but I think-I think that part of me has always been scared that I'll become that small eleven-year-old kid again, who believed in something temporary. And I found myself applying that to everything."
Ginny choked on her words, as she felt the dam break and the tears start cascading down her cheeks. She'd said one of her worst fears out loud, and it just showed how controlled she still was by that… monster.
She felt Harry's rough fingers brush away the tears as he kissed her forehead, his lips lingering on her skin.
"I don't think you know exactly how much I love you, Ginevra Weasley," he said, cupping her chin and looking directly into her eyes.
Green to Brown.
"And-and if I didn't have you in my life, I wouldn't know what to do," he said. "You, this," he pointed at each of them, "is the most solid thing I have, and it is not going away anytime soon. I won't let it."
She was still looking at him, her brown eyes streaked with red. It pained him to see her this way, but he needed to get his point across.
And after a long silence, Ginny whispered, her voice raspy from all that crying.
"Okay."
...
...
...
Spring had come with a gentle spirit, as one who realises that warming up slowly brings the best results to the heart.
Harry's head was on her lap, the ghost of a smile on his lips as Ginny played with the ends of his hair. It had grown out in the last two months, and he hadn't bothered to cut it, so that it now rested just above his neck.
Ginny, needless to say, was not impressed.
"You look like Tarzan," she complained. "Just with black hair."
"You know Tarzan?"
"I have a Muggle-obsessed father," Ginny quipped. "I literally grew up around Tarzan and Her-Hercel—"
"Hercules."
"Yes that."
Harry laughed and Ginny bent forward, her lips lingering on his scar. For a moment, she hesitated, her smile off her face in a short second as she nudged Harry to get up. Her hands left his hair and brought out a box from behind her, prying it open to reveal a silver ring, with vines running across its length, identical to the ones she had seen two months earlier.
"I know this is overdue and I know last time didn't go out as you'd have wished it to," Ginny scrambled, "But will you... marry me, Harry?"
"Huh?" Harry's eyes widened and he shot up, gaping at Ginny in disbelief.
"Will you marry me, Harry?"
Disbelief turned to delight as his face broke out in a smile in mere seconds and he kissed Ginny, one hand wrapped around her waist. The other slipped into his jacket pocket, and he brought out a small box that had been lying untouched for the past two months.
"Only if you marry me, Gin," he said, as he took out the ring.
Ginny's eyes widened and she laughed giddily. "Have you been carrying that ring all this time?"
Harry nodded, smiling at the look of incredulity on Ginny's face.
"Then yes."
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thenovelartist · 3 years
Text
A Blanc Slate, Chapter 3
<Previous Next >
7. Secrets
Oh how the dirty laundry was hung out to dry in the week after the Agreste Mansion fire.
Apparently, the corpse of Gabriel Agreste’s wife was kept preserved underneath the mansion. Which, of course, brought on all the questions of how and why she was there, followed by questions pertaining to Gabriel Agreste’s sanity and even more questions as to why he did it.
Unfortunately, the only person who knew was dead.
Early reports said that it was likely he suffocated in the fire. However, the coroner’s report came out recently saying that there was evidence of an altercation: a fractured arm, a few broken ribs, and a cracked skull. Due to the autopsy report, it was suspected Gabriel was dead before the fire broke out. However, with the crime scene as they knew it had been burned to the ground, along with any clues that could have lead to a more solid answer.
Marinette, Alya, and Nino had done everything they could to reach out to Adrien, but he refused. “Sorry, I just need some time,” was his go-to excuse. His other being, “I’m not feeling great.”
Nino hated it, but he still wanted to be a bro and respect Adrien’s wishes. Alya would have had no problem going over, busting down the door, and forcing a check-in, but Nino kept his girlfriend in check.
Egged on by Alya behind the scenes, Marinette decided that she was going to do that.
Well… maybe minus the “breaking down the door” part. She’d just insistently knock.
With a bag full of baked goods and a container of soup, she headed over. She’d been experimenting with this soup for his birthday, trying to replicate a recipe from his favorite café to surprise him with. But she thought now would be a good time to share it with him. Chat had even given it a good mark in his own way, so she was sure it would make Adrien happy.
Upon arriving at his new place—the address had been the one thing she’d been able to drag out of Nino—she knocked a couple times before waiting. When he didn’t answer, she knocked again. If he didn’t answer after this one, she’d give him a call.
However, she heard the lock on the door click and put on her best smile. “Hey, Adri—Oh, my gosh, how’d you get that black eye?!”
The expression he gave her clearly stated he didn’t want to talk about it while also regretting worrying her. “Don’t tell Nino. Or Alya. Please.”
“What happened, though!”
His lips pursed, curling downwards at the edges. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
She nearly stamped her foot on the ground because that made two of the most important men in her life who refused to let her in. However, she couldn’t force anything. Instead, she asked, “Are you okay?”
He opened his mouth, but words seemed to catch in his throat for a moment. “I will be.”
“Adrien.”
With a sigh, he reached out to pat her head. “I appreciate that you care, Marinette,” he began. “But really, don’t worry about it, okay?”
She didn’t want to give him time. She wanted to fix it. She wanted to be able to do something, anything, for her boys. But she couldn’t if they kept keeping secrets like this.
With a sigh, she relented, unable to do anything else. “Okay.”
He stroked her hair, and if she wasn’t so damn worried, her heart might have fluttered at the action. “Thank you,” he said before pulling his hand away. “So, was that the only reason you came by? To check in on me?”
“It was either me or Alya.”
His smile was sheepish. “I’d rather have you. Alya scares me.”
His grin seemed weary, but it was still enough to put Marinette at ease and a smile on her own face. “She’s pretty pissed. Nino’s also really worried about you. Maybe you should give him a call.”
He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, and only then did she realize the hand he’d been so good at hiding behind the door this whole time was wrapped heavily in bandages
“Adrien!”
He jumped at her voice, taking a step back, but Marinette was quick. She grabbed his arm before he could hide it again. “How’d you get this? Oh, wait, ‘you don’t want to talk about it’?”
He groaned. “I got into a little argument with my dad last week, came home and hit the wall. I don’t think I broke anything, but it still hurts.”
Marinette sighed. “Damn it, Adrien. Why didn’t you tell us? We could have been there to support you.”
Adrien turned his head away, refusing to look at her. “I… I just needed some time alone, okay? There was a lot on my mind. Please, just drop it.”
“Okay,” she caved. He was already talking with her now, as opposed to pushing her away again, so she would meet him halfway and stop arguing. “Do you want a croissant? Maybe some soup? Or you’ve got a sweet tooth. Maybe a cookie?”
Adrien looked somewhat surprised by the change of subject, but soon, he relaxed in relief. “I wouldn’t mind a cookie.”
She gave him a smile, one she had to force a bit to be brighter than it was. “Okay. I thought you would.”
8. Princess and Knight
The knock on her balcony door could only be one person.
Rather, one cat.
With a grin, Marinette rushed to answer her trap door. “Chat Noir. How nice of you to come see me.”
He looked rather stoic. “I’m not ‘Noir’ anymore.”
“You’ll always be Chat Noir,” she gently countered. “You just happen to look a little different at the moment.”
He sighed, clearly not wanting to continue their conversation. He then handed the bag in his hand over to her. “Here. The clothes you leant me. Washed and clean. And a little extra ‘thank you’ gift for your kindness before.”
“Oh,” she said, looking at the bag. “Thank you, but you didn’t have to get me anything.”
Chat just shrugged.
Looking at the bag, Marinette hesitated to take it. She had wondered if Chat would appear before her or if he’d just drop the bag and run. Now, she feared he’d bolt the moment she took the bag from his hand, and that was the last thing she wanted.
Impulsively, she reached past the bag to grab hold of his wrist. “Come inside for a minute. Let me get you some cookies for the road.”
His brow scrunched together, showing his hesitancy.
She shot him her best smile, going as far as batting her eyes at him, a technique her friends had forced her to learn a few years ago in an attempt to get Adrien’s attention. “Please, Chat? I’m sure you’d like a treat?”
He sighed. “Thank you, princess, but I’ll decline.”
“Aww, really? I can’t convince you to stay a moment?”
“No.”
“Wow. That was cold.”
Chat stood, trying to remove her hand from his, and though he was trying to be firm, he wasn’t being overly forceful. “I came to thank you, not to linger on your kindness any more.”
“But what if I want you to linger in my kindness.”
He scoffed. “Why would you bother?”
“Because I care about you?”
“You barely know me.”
Oh, kitty, I know you better than you could fathom. “So?”
“So, I took advantage of your kindness once—”
“Do it again.”
The words that came so easily out of her mouth had clearly startled him. Frankly, they surprised her a little, too, but those words also allowed her a moment to crawl fully out of the hatch and stand right before him. “I don’t mind. In fact, I want to.”
Chat looked at her, exhaustion lingering behind the stoniness in his eyes. “Princess, you’re killing me here.”
She tightened her grip, leaning closer. “Good. Maybe I can offer you a little break away from your world.”
“Who said I needed one?”
“You’re still white, and you’re not in a signature smile. I dare you to tell me I’m wrong.”
His brow furrowed, eyes hardening, yet he didn’t pull away.
And she wasn’t going to surrender, either.
The stare down lasted a good many seconds, neither moving or backing down.
“Are you trying to seduce me, princess?” he eventually asked, the slightest edge of teasing in his tone while the corner of his lips quirked upwards.
Her heart could soar at the sight. “So what if I am?”
He flashed her a fake roguish grin, leaning closer in what she quickly realized was an attempt to coax her backwards. “I’d say there’s only room for one flirt in this town, and it sure won’t be you.”
She stood her ground, knowing that if she wasn’t careful, she’d fall right through her trapdoor. Which was likely his plan and why he’d just started flirting. She knew him too well by now to know his flirting was a cover-up. Always had been, and always would be.
That didn’t mean he couldn’t also wreck her heart when he stopped the flirting and pulled a genuine romantic gesture. It always wrecked her heart when he stood with his heart bared to her. And maybe over time, those gestures built up love for him in her own heart. And maybe that’s why she stood here so adamantly now, unwilling to let him go.
“Oh?” she flirted back, trying to channel her ‘inner Chat’. “How would you know? Maybe I’m better.”
“I doubt that. This cat has worked hard and purr-fecting his technique to make the ladies swoon.”
She hummed. “You pull out all the stops on Ladybug, don’t you?”
It was as though she’d doused him with cold water, because all teasing disappeared in an instant.
Her regret level was high, but at the same time, she wasn’t even sure what she’d said to change the mood so fast. “Chat?”
He sighed, pulling away and shaking his head. “It’s nothing.”
“It’s clearly not nothing,” she countered.
“It is,” he firmly stated. “And don’t think otherwise.”
Biting her lip, Marinette wracked her brain for how to possibly coerce him into talking. “Something wrong with Ladybug?” she asked, reaching out to grab his other hand. “Because I haven’t see—”
“Ahh!”
In a flash, Chat ripped both his hands from hers and cradled his left hand close to his chest.
Her gut sank. “You’re hurt?”
He grit his teeth. “I’m fine.”
“Liar.”
His ears sank in shame for a moment. “Let it go, Marinette,” he snipped, already taking steps backwards and away. “I’m fine.”
“You’re clearly not. What happ—”
“Does it get tiring?”
His eyes took on a hard edge to them, and that was the moment she knew she screwed up. “What?”
“Trying to weasel into my business,” he challenged.
“How was I weaseling?”
“I’m a grown man. I don’t need you mothering me.”
“Well, I wouldn’t if you weren’t hurt.”
The moment those words left her mouth, Marinette regretted it. Instead, her consequence was watching Chat’s expression harden, eyes glinting like the edge of a knife.
“Who do you think you are?”
She flinched at the harshness of his tone.
“You’re not Ladybug,” he hissed. “We barely know each other. Why are you so damn worked up over me getting hurt?”
Because I am your lady, dammit! But she couldn’t say that. And without that, she wasn’t fully sure what to say. “Can’t I care about you at all without my motives being questioned?”
“I don’t need your help, Marinette!” he shouted. “So, stop trying to fix things and let me take care of my own business! You don’t have any idea what I’m facing—"
“Of course I don’t! You know why?” Marinette felt something snap in her at his words, and her own feelings came tumbling out before she could stop them. “Because you’re a knight with a martyr complex who thinks he has to bear the weight of the world alone on his own shoulders. I’m no princess, Chat, and neither is Ladybug. So why is it impossible for you to let either of us help you? Do you not trust Ladybug to help you? Do you think she’s incapable? Do you hate working with her that much?”
“I love her more than you could ever imagine!” he shouted, shocking her so badly she had to take a step back to steady herself. “She is incredibly strong and capable, and don’t you dare do her the injustice of stating otherwise. But that is exactly why I’m keeping her out of this. What I’m facing is personal, and it’s something I need to do on my own. You wouldn’t understand and don’t even try to. You’re an outsider here, Marinette. Stop trying to pretend you’re the superhero here and micro-manage everything about someone you don’t even know!”
And with that, Chat whipped out his baton, and Marinette was left watching a white ghost float over the rooftops of Paris, further and further away until he finally disappeared.
9. Blanket
The night wasn’t chilly, but she still had a blanket draped over her shoulders as she stood out on her balcony. It had been a week since the little altercation between her and Chat, and she regretted so many things she said and how she handled the whole situation.
Chat was hurting, and while she had been prying, she’d also gone against his wishes to do so. He had shut himself off, and instead of just being a safe spot he could land with no questions asked, she’d pushed and pressed and prodded any way she could to get information out of him. In her defense, she had only wanted to help as well as try to keep her cat around so he wouldn’t run again.
But a trapped cat doesn’t submit easily, she supposed. Especially one with as much fight in them as Chat Noir had.
So, she wanted to apologize, even though she knew it was unlikely he’d come around again. And who knew if she’d see him again. He said he’d see Ladybug at least one more time to give up his miraculous, but she didn’t want to wait until then to see him again. Though, the longer she stood out here on the balcony with no sign of Chat on the horizon at all, she thought that might be her only chance.
If it was, then she had to be careful not to squander it. Let this be her lesson, and let it be her only one because she really couldn’t afford to make a mistake on her last chance.
“Marinette,” Tikki said, flying up to rest on her shoulder. “It’s past midnight. You should really come inside and go to bed.”
She didn’t want to, but there really wasn’t any other choice. Chat wasn’t coming, and she knew it. “Okay.”
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takuyakistall · 4 years
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I recently re-read his Dorm SSR personal story here! A few questions and thoughts lingered inside my head as I read it and it collectively got worse when @poisonepel​ started questioning things too. Which ultimately led to me writing this down while running on half a brain cell and a spoonful of rice for lunch. This isn’t necessarily an analysis but more of just me questioning a lot of stuff. I already pointed out things that are already obvious so it might get repetitive. Placed under the cut since it’s a bit lengthy! I tried my best to be coherent in the very least.
Rook’s Nickname for Jade - Rook calls Jade “Monsieur Mastermind” and perhaps you’re already telling me right now that I shouldn’t look deeper into this since it doesn’t look like it matters anyway but let me tell you right now that I tend to overanalyze things when it comes to Jade. I find it a bit odd how Rook calls Jade the mastermind, presuming that we’re talking about the Octavinelle trio, when it’s often Azul that’s shown to be as such. Of course, it’s been revealed that Rook analyzes or stalks nearly everything that happens to catch his interest (Jade’s Gym Personal). So it’s safe to presume that his judgement is, if not entirely correct, accurate. “Your staple food, your habits, your walking speed, when you sleep, your heart rate, how many times you blink… those and many others I have recorded perfectly.” Just by reading this line alone I became pretty sure that he observed something deeper than that--which is his personality.
       The question is, why is Jade the mastermind instead of Azul? Why is Azul’s nickname “Roi du Fort” instead of being the mastermind? Well, it might be common knowledge but Jade, in a way, controls Azul despite what it looks like to the public which is Azul controlling Jade since he, as the higher authority, has power over him. I read a popular post explaining why Jade probably undertakes the role of a servant rather than taking the position for himself knowing that he has the full capabilities to do so. This will be explained further later in a different note.
What I’m trying to imply is that behind the scenes, Azul isn’t really the mastermind behind everything despite what it seems. It’s Jade who’s really in control of things, by picking up the act of a servant or butler. 
“If the entire hierarchy collapses just due to the absence of a single person, then that proves that they aren’t all as great as they seem.” - I just had the need to point this particular line out since it just seemed so… Jade. Everything about this line just screams out the same vibes he radiates, cold and severe. I know he’s faking the whole thing about having a falling out with Azul and wanting to join Pomefiore but I think it is true that without him, Octavinelle won’t nearly be as great from when he was still there.
First of all, He’s Octavinelle’s vice-dorm leader. Surely, being in such a high position, he carries a lot of duties that only he can do as the acting vice leader. There’s also the fact that he does it superbly than other people which is why Octavinelle is the way it is right now, it would be hard to replace him. They would have to look for someone who’s on par with Jade, in the very least.
Secondly, he’s somewhat an emotional pillar to Azul. Judging from their childhood and current relationship as of now, I like to think that a big reason why Azul is the way he is right now, is because of Jade and Floyd acting as his emotional support or whatever even though they insist that their relationship is purely just for business and will drop it if it’s no longer beneficiary to them. The main reason why I think that way is because of the Octavinelle CM which has a scene of Azul holding a bubble in between his hands. Inside the bubble were the twins in their eel forms. The next thing that happened--the bubble popped and disappeared, along with the tweels inside it. We could see the horror on Azul’s face when it happened in that scene and slowly led to the overblot scene which says a lot about how Azul views the twins. Have a more detailed explanation regarding their relationship here! Summary, Azul will lose his shit if Jade were to disappear. Now, where is Octavinelle in all of this? Probably a mess in the corner right there with their dorm leader not in his right state of mind. In short, Octavinelle will probably crumble under the absence of Jade. The reason why Octavinelle is still functioning under Azul’s command during this whole stunt Jade is making is precisely because Azul knew that it was all an act.
"Jade’s excellence in everything he does is renowned even among the Dorm Leaders. He might be a super secretary or something to be able to answer Azul's difficult requests." - Vil's words to Rook during their little talk about letting Jade into Pomefiore. This stuck out to me because back then I didn't really give this much thought but now that I'm re-reading this, it makes me wonder how good is Jade at his job as a Vice Dorm Leader? These words coming from Vil hold a certain weight I can't describe, for him to say that his excellence is renowned even among the Dorm Leaders and to be described as a Super Secretary.
For Jade to have earned this kind of reputation despite being in the land for only two years so far is quite a feat! I would've expected less from someone else but this is Jade we're talking about so, ignoring his terrible weakness in flying, I can assume that Jade worked hard for him to have reached this kind of performance level in such a short time. To be recognized by almost all of the Dorm Leaders isn't an easy feat.
Jade as an attendant - During his first day as Vil's attendant, Vil mentioned how off-putting he is from the fact that Jade was almost too good for someone on their first day. "You managed to get on such friendly terms with the stuffy and straight-laced people of the industry in such little time; and you were also perfect when it came to helping out with the shooting. You've worked much harder than I thought you would." His words. I think this is due to the nature of Jade's silver tongue, which is being able to speak in a way that makes other people do or believe what you want them to do or believe. It seems very fitting for a character like Jade.
Because of the recent personals that got released for Jade, namely the Birthday SSR, they talked about family there and it got me thinking quite a bit as to how Jade can speak so eloquently especially now that I've read that he managed to get on the good side of people who are probably way older than he is and straight-laced, no less. He vaguely mentioned their family background when he was telling a story from his childhood and said how different people would come over to their party and offer them presents. I'm assuming that these people are possibly older than he is, judging from the fact that one of them attempted to give the twins liquor despite them being at a young age, and I thought that maybe Jade grew up used to being surrounded by adults to the point where he picks up a lot of speech patterns and habits. Which inevitably leads to what he is right now. Nothing is confirmed yet, this is a mere thought I had.
Jade's past with Azul - It's briefly mentioned here in the story. Jade mentioned how there weren't as many mer-folk as there are humans so they were all basically put in the same class together during elementary school. Azul didn't catch his interest back then, it seems. He mentioned not being able to remember the very reason why the three of them—Jade, Floyd, and Azul—ended up together currently in Night Raven College.
I am genuinely curious as to what actually made the twins interested in someone like Azul. Correct me if I'm wrong but they did mention it in Chapter 3, right? Was it the growing interest when they finally took notice of Azul using his unique magic on basically everyone who fell into his trap? Someone tell me the details if it was ever mentioned, my memory is failing me.
“Tenebres” - The shoe brand Vil wanted to get his hands on but unfortunately did not obtain, particularly, the Mirror Shoe. "Tenebres" apparently only sells their products to people who they deem worthy for designs, even the designer themselves has yet to make a public appearance as they are shrouded in mystery. Vil didn't have enough time to acquire it but, surprise! Jade Leech has somehow managed to get his perfect hands on the pair of red shoes Vil wanted so much. Frankly enough, Vil was impressed he managed to obtain something he could not—alone, no less.
This is just me pondering but this particular line made me wonder, "Heh, they did some at the cost of a bit of trouble. No matter, how about you try these on instead of dwelling on the matter?", to what lengths did he actually have to go through to obtain just a pair of shoes? Or rather, what connections does he have to be able to obtain this so easily and brush it off with a mere, "cost of a bit of trouble" when clearly Vil already expressed the difficulty in obtaining these?
Another note I have to make but not completely sure if it's relevant is his family. As I've said before, they mentioned that they deal with a lot of people due to the nature of their business and that made me wonder if the designer/owner of this certain shoe brand is one of them? Perhaps Jade was able to easily contact them because of connections his family has although Floyd's wish in the event Stars & Wishes contradicts this possibility.
In Floyd's wish, he mentioned wanting a pair of shoes and Idia immediately asked him why he couldn't just buy them. Floyd answered with a simple, "I can't usually get them." Because of the price. Which, again, contradicts my theory about the Leech family being connected to the shoe brand. Although! Vil did mention how the shoe brand only sells it to people they deem worthy. Perhaps, Floyd isn't…? No—it still wouldn't explain how easily Jade got the shoes and had the brand get Vil a job there as an ambassador. Surely, that isn't due to just any normal connections anymore. Definitely shady, I want to know more.
Jade is in control - As I've said earlier, Jade is somewhat in control despite playing the role of a servant. Prime example is when Vil told him his throat was parched, Jade immediately acted upon it fully knowing what his original intentions were. He gave Vil a drink that the Mostro Lounge was apparently serving without having Vil question it further and even went as far as to let Jade take a picture and post it—even he decided the caption for the post! With a simple flow of events just like that, Jade has managed to manipulate Vil without him knowing. He did it all while taking in the role of a servant and that in itself says a lot about how he does things
I think it's worth it to take note of the fact that Jade does not like bringing attention to himself and merely brushes it off as mere shyness of some sorts when really, all he wants to do is lay low and draw as little attention to himself. It makes his job easier that way—perhaps that's the reason why he lets Azul take the spotlight all the damn time.
Another thing to take note of is something I saw from a post in Tumblr which basically sums up the whole reason why Jade is always adopting the butler persona wherever he goes. It's because he likes to be in control that way—you'd let down your guard around him and let him serve you. You want a drink? He'll serve you a drink but-! He is in control over what you will get. That's exactly what happened in this exact scene, Vil waltzed right into the center of Jade's palms.
Vil never noticed - I'm not saying Vil is dumb, because he is most definitely not. Although through the very end, I don't know if it's just because Vil got carried away with the feeling of achievement taking over him due to recent events but he did just brush away the reason why Jade was in Pomefiore in the first place and let him go away peacefully, "So long as he doesn't bare his fangs at us." In other words, Jade managed to outsmart Vil and possibly, Rook.
This is probably one of the reasons why I am confident enough to say that Jade truly is one of the most cunning bitches in the entire game because this whole ordeal just pretty much proved it.
Aftermath - There we go! We got an explanation about how Jade managed to manipulate and use Vil for his own gains err, in this context, probably Azul's. When Jade took a picture of Vil with the drink and posted it, he did it with the intention of taking advantage of Vil's popularity and viewer reach. Jade expressed his thankfulness when he mentioned how Vil saw him as "useful" perhaps his reputation prior helped him reach his goal? 
Azul praised Jade with something along the lines of "As expected of you, Jade. You're the best Night Raven's College has to offer when it comes to sneaking into another's pockets after all." Which really just backs up some of the statements I made earlier about how Jade manipulates people by letting people let their guard down around him while thinking they're the ones who have power over Jade when clearly it's not as simple as it seems. Azul mentioning that only Jade could pull off something like this just puts me off for some reason but I'll leave it be for the time being.
After that, Jade and Azul had a conversation that started with Azul asking him if he had any difficulties during his stay in Pomefiore and if he had any troubles keeping up with Vil. Jade, jokingly(?), responded that it was nothing compared to Azul's demands and orders and his time at Pomefiore was actually a vacation of some sorts for him. Which really makes me wonder what jobs does Azul usually give him if this one was somewhat of a break for Jade? A task that seemed impossible to Floyd, Jade said it was a vacation. It's a bit frightening but I guess that's his charm? Hard-working is one way to put it. 
That's the end of my Dorm SSR mini-analysis, I guess! Thank you for sticking with me till the end even though a lot of these might be repetitive. I'll probably add more depending on future brainrot but for now, this is fine. Feel free to tell me what you think about this!
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And when dick finds out jason KNEW and didn't tell b/c of the bet. oh man. Can we get a chapter in dick's pov on this? idc where u put it I just really want to read it.
Dick rolled his eyes at his brother’s antics. Honestly, he didn’t really care who Ladybug was. They had more than enough proof that she was on the good side and their little squabble didn’t seem all that serious.
Besides, no one in France knew who she was after her being a hero for four years. Dick wasn’t one to attempt the impossible (he loved things that seemed impossible, but that’s different than things that actually are).
Still, Damian had come to him for help and he was fine taking some time out of his day to research with him.
And what did they find? Pretty much nothing.
The Parisians either guessed her age as 15-21 or somewhere in the thousands.
She had to have come over from France over the past two days but there wasn’t a single person even moderately matching her description who had come over.
Her friend group was iffy. Supposedly she was friends with someone named Chloe Bourgeois, who’d had the bee miraculous for a short period of time. Then again, some footage indicated that Ladybug might actually hate the girl, so that information was useless. All the other heroes she’d worked with were still a mystery.
And her powers? God, don’t even get him started on her powers. Did she know what she was going to summon or not -- sometimes it seemed like it and sometimes it didn’t. Just how far did the apparent invulnerability go? How does someone take a miraculous? How does her outfit work? Why won’t the mask come off? How much did her cure actually fix? The only thing they knew for sure was that she had to participate in a battle for her to be able to use it.
Even Tim hadn’t been able to scrounge up more than rumors.
But Damian still wanted Dick to be there when he confronted Ladybug with the information and question her, and he didn’t really have anything better to do.
Finding her was way harder than they thought it’d be. You’d think someone in bright red would be easy to spot in the middle of the night, but apparently not.
But, eventually, they found her.
She didn’t seem to notice them for a while. She hopped from rooftop to rooftop, drink in hand.
And then she stopped. She took a long sip from her drink.
“What do you want?” She asked. Well, at least they knew for sure she was French. Her accent was still pretty thick.
Dick and Damian looked at each other awkwardly. What were they supposed to say? ‘We tried to stalk you on the internet but it didn’t work’?
She spun on her heel and repeated herself: “What do you want?” Her smile was getting more strained.
Damian crossed his arms over his chest. “Who are you?”
Wow. Smooth. He fought the urge to sigh.
Ladybug grinned cheekily as she matched his posture. “I’m Ladybug, of course.”
He could already tell they weren’t going to get anything of substance from her. Still, Damian was sending him pleading looks out of the corner of his eyes. He brought a smile to his face. “We’ve spent the last few days researching you. We looked up immigration records, plane flights, everything. No one matches your descriptions. You, frankly, don’t exist.”
She tapped her earrings. “That’s ‘cause of magic. It keeps people from finding out my identity if I don’t want them to.”
He blinked and looked at Robin, trying to gauge if this could be true. Sure, metas existed and the internet had attributed her powers to the earrings she wore, but the idea of earrings giving people powers was still kinda odd for him.
Robin didn’t know. Great.
And then Ladybug took a sip of her drink and Dick gave pause. He’d seen that cup before. Pretty much every day, actually. He could ask Tim about it later --.
He was pulled back to the present when Damian groaned and left. He broke into a wide smile. Maybe this wouldn’t be impossible, after all.
He held out a hand to shake. “It’s been nice meeting you. Sorry about my…” He hesitated for a half-second, unsure whether he wanted to say ‘brother’. He glanced at her eyes and decided against it. He didn’t like how intent they looked. Whoever she was, she wasn’t stupid, that much was obvious.  “... partner. He’s a bit annoying.”
She beamed as she shook his hand. “It’s fine. It’s been a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Nightwing. I hope next time we can get to know each other without him around.”
He chuckled. “Just Nightwing would be fine. And that sounds great.” He gave one last wave before hopping away.
~
Jason’s phone rang and Dick grinned, glad for an excuse to stop working for even a second.
“Who wants to talk to you?”
He held up his phone to show it was ‘Timberly’.
They both frowned at this. Tim? Calling during work? He must be dying.
Jason turned on his speaker.
“Heya, Replacement, what’s up?”
“Hey, I’m going to take the day off.”
Jason and Dick looked at each other for a long time, stunned. And then they finally processed it. “WHAT?!”
“WHO IS THIS?!”
“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM?!”
“ARE YOU OKAY?!”
“IS THIS A PRANK?!”
“Yes, I’m fine. No, it’s not a prank. I’ve met someone --”
Jason laughed.
“-- not like that, Jay -- and I’m giving her a tour of the city. She just got here from France a while ago.”
Cafe person? From France? Dick’s brain clicked and he shoved Jason out of the way to get to the phone. “Did you meet her at the cafe?”
“Yes, I met her at the coffee shop, Dick. What does it matter?”
“She could be Ladybug.”
Tim and Jason laughed at him. Laughed.
“You’re insane. Can I have time off or not?”
Dick fought back his annoyance. Tim was actually asking to leave and he wasn’t going to stop him. “Yes!”
“Please!” Added Jason.
The line went dead. Dick dropped back onto the couch and pulled out his own phone.
How could he bully Tim into bringing (the person who might be) Ladybug over?
He opened up the family group chat.
Idontwantpicturesthatsjustmyname: Guys you will not BELIEVE this
~
Dick rested his head on his hands as he watched Marinette from across the table.
“So, what do you know about Ladybug?”
Her eyes widened slightly. Whether this was because of the suddenness of the question or because he was right he wasn’t sure.
“Subtle,” Jason said sarcastically. He sent Dick a short glare as if to say ‘don’t scare her off we just met her’ and then gave Marinette an apologetic smile. “Sorry, ‘bout that. He’s been obsessed since she appeared, and most of his research has been a dead end. He’s grasping at straws.”
She relaxed and gave a soft laugh. “I’m too klutzy to ever be Ladybug, you can ask anyone.”
Dick tried not to look too skeptical. He’d purposefully surprised her with a rather forceful hug when he’d met her to see how good her balance was when she wasn’t paying attention. She’d had no problem both staying up and supporting their weight.
He couldn’t tell her that, though.
He groaned. “And I don’t suppose you know who it is?”
“Nope.”
And, just like that, the conversation moved on. Damn it, Jason, can’t you relax for a few seconds so he can interrogate her? Ugh.
Still, he smiled at Tim’s expression as Marinette began to explain exactly how they’d met. Even if it annoyed him that he hadn’t gotten any information, no one could ever pass up on the opportunity to mess with their siblings.
~
Jason sent Dick a glare as he pulled on his leather jacket. “You want to what?”
“Do a stakeout!” Dick said brightly. “I’m pretty sure Marinette is Ladybug.”
Tim sighed. “So we’re going to stalk my new friend? Great. Maybe this is why my friendships don’t last.”
“C’mon! It’s not like you even have to go, Tim.”
“And let you guys embarrass me? No thanks.”
“She won’t know --,” Jason said.
Tim sighed and put on his mask. “No. Come on. Dick, you owe me a coffee.”
Dick groaned but nodded. “Fine, I’m paying for snacks. Let’s go.”
~
“For the record, I think you’re stupid,” said Jason as they started to pull themselves up the fire escape.
“Thanks!” Said Dick brightly. “I know I’m right, but thanks!”
Jason laughed quietly. “Suuuure. Wanna bet?”
“Sure. How about 3k?”
He rolled his eyes. “Only 3? Are you really sure?”
Dick scoffed. “Fine. 5k.”
Jason smirked and pulled himself up the last rung and sat himself down on the edge. “Sucker.”
Tim glanced inside and gave sarcastic jazz hands. “Wow. How suspicious. She’s going to sleep.”
“Can’t you guys even pretend to believe me?”
“Nope. You’re insane, dude, the girl probably couldn’t hurt a fly if she wanted to.”
“I know what I saw. That coffee cup was the same one he --” he pointed at Tim “-- brings home all the time. And he saw her get one that day. She’s French and new in town. It’s got to be her.”
Tim sighed. “This feels wrong,” he mumbled. He took a long sip of his drink before continuing: “She’s a civvie, we can’t just watch her.”
“She might be a civvie,” corrected Dick.
His brothers groaned and they all opened their bags of Doritos.
And then Marinette flung the window open and stuck her head out. “Could you guys not do this outside my window?”
Everyone jumped. Tim literally jumped, nearly falling over the side of the fire escape in his surprise. They got into fighting poses on instinct.
Marinette had gone a little pale at the sight of them.
They quickly dropped their guards.
She flashed a weak smile. “Oh, I’m sorry, sirs. I thought you were just guys on my fire escape. You on a stakeout?”
Everyone looked at each other confusedly. Did her accent somehow get worse in the few hours since they met her? Tim looked especially confused by the development.
“Of sorts,” said Red Hood carefully.
She yawned and rubbed her eyes and her accent slipped back towards normal as she spoke: “If you’re staking out, can you…?” She trailed off and her eyes found their way to their Doritos. “Is that really all you’re eating tonight?” She asked, her lips falling into a frown.
The three all looked at each other.
“I mean... yeah, it’s stakeout food,” said Dick.
She clicked her tongue. “C’mon,” she waved them inside and began walking to her kitchen.
They all shrugged as they stepped through her window. What did it matter?
Dick snooped around her apartment with his brothers. He didn’t really know what he was looking for, just evidence that she did anything shady, but really he didn’t know where she’d hide anything. The place was pretty empty.
‘Damn, you live like this?’ He thought, giving her a glance and shaking his head.
His eyes found their way to her bed and he frowned. She’d set up a fake version of herself with pillows and blankets… but hadn’t she made it seem like she’d gone straight from bed to the window? How awake had she really been? And, if she’d been awake, had the accent been faked? Why?
He raised an eyebrow at the real Marinette.
“There were three people outside my window, did you want me not to take precautions?”
He looked away. Fair enough.
He continued looking for anything, but his attempts were fruitless. He would have thrown his hands up in frustration if he didn’t think that would make her suspicious of their true intentions.
Unable to do much else without making it obvious, he wandered over to watch her bake.
~
Dick looked the NightMare outfit up and down.
Ladybug sighed. “What?”
Maybe he could get some information on how her powers worked.
“Why is this outfit more intricate than your normal one?”
Ladybug rolled her eyes. “Because I was intending to make it look like a coincidence that I showed up here right after the Ladybug in Paris defeated Hawkmoth,” she said.
He knew she was lying. He didn’t know how he knew she was lying, maybe it was the cadence of her voice or the fact that she had a tendency to keep them as in the dark about her identity as possible, but she was definitely lying.
But he couldn’t prove it.
So he moved on.
~
She stumbled out of her portal and sent them all a tiny wave. “Salut.”
Dick’s eyes widened and he rushed forward to catch her in case she fell. She didn’t, but he still wrapped her arm around his shoulders to hold her upright. “Christ! What did they do to you?”
"Some sort of tranquilizer,” she mumbled, closing her eyes. “We need to warn the Waynes.”
He tensed and looked at his family, who were anxiously shifting from foot to foot.
“You’re not in any state to do that,” said Bruce, finally.
“I can open a portal.”
A wide smile stretched across his face. Aha! She’d admitted that she had to have been somewhere to open a portal. He had her now! “You’ve been to Wayne Manor?”
She opened an eye just enough to send him a glare. “No, but I’ve been outside it.”
His smile dropped. Damn. That’s a good point. The outside was a pretty popular tourist spot. He sighed.
“You need to get home,” said Tim. “I’ll make sure everyone turns around.”
Dick sent him a slight glare but let go of Ladybug and turned away. As much as he wanted to be right, the idea of watching her stumble into her room while half-awake in order to confirm this made him feel a little sick.
He could figure it out some other time, at least.
~
Jason dropped Ladybug onto the bed and they all scrambled around her.
Dick picked up a knife and started attempting to cut the suit around her wound and a curse slipped from his lips as it attempted to reform itself instantly.
After a few attempts, he reached for Ladybug’s earrings. He hadn’t even really been thinking about her identity, he’d just been frustrated about the apparent inability to help her.
Her hand shot up and grabbed his wrist before he could touch them. She tried to say something but couldn’t talk above the blood gurgling in her mouth.
He pulled his hand from her grip.
‘Fine, but when you die stupidly it’s not my fault,’ he thought.
He went back to attempting to tend to her wounds through her outfit.
~
Listen, just because he hadn’t done that didn’t mean that he didn’t still want to know.
He sent a text to Marinette. He’d check every once in a while to see if she responded, but if it took however long Ladybug was out then he would be right.
~
He stepped into the apartment and was stunned to see that Jason and Tim were already there.
But then he watched Marinette walk over. And she was probably injured, with how hard she was trying to hide her limp. And she clearly knew that he was onto her, otherwise why would she be trying to hide it?
“You’re walking a little weird, are you alright?” He said, a smug grin on his face.
But then Tim came to her rescue. He walked over and slung an arm over her shoulders protectively. “Maybe if you weren’t watching her walk she wouldn’t be overthinking it so much.”
Damn it. He hated it when Tim had a point.
Whatever. At least he’d thought of a plan B. He watched as Marinette’s eyes fell on Robin. She’d never met the vigilante before, so there was no reason why they shouldn’t get along.
And then she was nice to him.
He wanted to kick a wall. Was he actually wrong or was she just aware of what he was doing?
She pulled a bottle of wine from her cupboard. “You guys can all have this, right?”
There, a perfectly acceptable way to be petty. He snatched the drink from her hands. “It doesn’t matter because you can’t drink!”
Marinette raised her eyebrows. “It’s legal in my country.”
“But not in ours! Where you are currently staying! How did you even get your hands on this?”
She shrugged innocently.  “You’re more uptight than my actual mom.”
He scoffed. Rude!
So rude, in fact, that he didn’t realize that she had changed the subject until there was no natural way to come back to it.
He stared at the wine in his hands.
Screw it.
~
Dick glanced at his phone as he received a text.
His eyes lit up at the username. Marinette! Aha! He had her now! It had only been a day since Ladybug was released, surely this was proof --!
Definitelyforgottosleep: lemme in
He frowned. All thoughts of Ladybug were pushed out of his mind at the two words. Was she okay? What had happened?
~
Chloe Bourgeois? Where had he heard that name before?
A frown found its way to his face as he tried to recall this. “I know you.”
“You do?”
He nodded slightly and scratched the back of his head. “Definitely... so where...?”
Marinette looked a little pale. “Don’t all rich people kind of know each other?”
Dick gave a small nod. “I guess...” He said despite being sure that wasn’t it.
She grabbed both of them by their sleeves. “C’moooon. It’s cold out, we can at least do this inside.”
~
Dick watched from a bit away, trying to fight back a grin as Marinette and Cass greeted each other.
“Hi,” Marinette squeaked.
Cass looked Marinette up and down. If anyone could crack this case in two seconds, it was her…
And she did.
“Are you a vigilante?”
He fought the urge to squeal. Yes! Yesyesyesyesyesyes --!
And then Jason appeared out of nowhere to tackle Marinette in a hug.
This couldn’t ruin his good mood, though. Nothing could.
“Cass thinks that Mari could be a vigilante,” said Dick with a cheeky look on his face.
Jason and Marinette tensed slightly and looked at each other.
Then, Cass gave a short laugh. “No, wait, I was wrong. Don’t worry about it, Dick.”
Ah. Nothing could ruin his good mood except for that.
His smile dropped instantly and he groaned. “Dang…”
~
Dick looked between Marinette and Tim with horror. Ladybug had confessed literally hours ago and here he was dating Marinette? What the heck? Sure, they were cute together, but that was just cold. Couldn’t he have waited a few days at least?
It didn’t even occur to him that maybe the whole ‘Ladybug confessing’ thing could be linked.
~
When he’d turned on his comm, he hadn’t expected anything much from it.
“The bug’s been bugged,” said Cass.
“She’s been what?”
“Bugged. Someone bad found out her identity and now she’s got a bug.”
There was a silence as this sunk in.
Then Dick was yelling. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN SOMEONE FOUND OUT HER CIVILIAN IDENTITY?!”
“Damn, Nightwing, didn’t know you cared so much,” said Tim, who sounded a bit on edge.
“WHY DID THEY GET TO KNOW BEFORE ME?!”
“Because everyone gets to know before you,” said Cass calmly. “You’re officially the last to know.”
“IM SORRY?! EVERYONE KNEW?!”
“Yep.”
He couldn’t believe he’d been betrayed like this, especially by his own family.
And so he questioned them.
Tim had apparently figured her out the second day and not said anything about it because ‘her identity clearly matters to her, she didn’t even know I knew it until a little while ago’. Damn him. Dick couldn’t even get mad at him for that.
And then Jason was next. He’d apparently found out when Marinette had gotten shot. He’d given the same reasoning as Tim, which was more than a little suspicious.
Bruce was next. He’d found out on the Wayne Manor cams and hadn’t said anything because he thought everyone already knew. Ouch.
Duke said that he had just found out when Marinette had touched her comm. He got a pass.
And then Cass said she’d found out the moment she’d met the girl. Dick had suspected that, considering the conversation they’d had on Thanksgiving, but then he’d questioned her on why she hadn’t told him and…
“Red Hood and Marinette didn’t want you to know, so.”
Dick was practicing breathing exercises. It didn’t work, though. “WHO IS SHE?!”
He had a strong suspicion he knew, considering Jason had kept the answer from him, but he wanted to hear it directly from someone.
Jason attempted to steer the conversation away: “Hey, so about that bug thing --.”
Whatever attempts to save his wallet he was about to make was ruined by Cass, who simply said: “Marinette.”
Let’s just say Jason was lucky that Dick was against murder.
He was not, however, against cursing him out for the entire family to hear.
~~~
When you have to read 44 chapters of your own fic to answer a prompt--
I probably missed some things, too. I put a lot of little things in
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dlwritings · 4 years
Text
Moving Out (and On?) | Tom Holland
masterlist found here
pairing - Tom x reader (ft Niall Horan) word count - 3,618 warnings - language A/N - for the anon who requested x | this edit was fun to make | ya’ll love a secret dating gone wrong fic
summary - You’re sick of being Tom’s secret girlfriend, always coming in second to his career. But you didn’t want your relationship to end. When everything goes up in flames, you turn to your favorite Irishman to give you some support.
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It was basically the most cliche issue you could have when secretly dating a celebrity. If the world doesn’t know you exist, interviewers are going to ask about other women. After almost two years of dating Tom Holland, you still weren’t quite used to it. For a while, it was always about Zendaya. Then, it just became any famous girl he was seen with. But Tom wasn’t with any of them. He was with you. And you were getting a little tired of hiding it.
You did your best dealing with it. You loved Tom, and you didn’t want to ruin what you had just because you wanted to go public and he didn’t.
Tom was away on press for The Devil All the Time, and you were missing him a lot. You talked on the phone every night, but it didn’t make you miss him any less. To make up for his absence, you were keeping up with the videos different news outlets were posting from his press tour. You were pumped to see that he had done another Wired autocomplete interview. His previous one had been with Zendaya and Jacob, so you were kind of excited to see him do one alone.
Tom introduced himself, and you couldn’t help but smile at his voice. Once he was handed a board, he was quick to begin. “What is Tom Holland’s,” Tom read, peeling off a strip, “phone number.” He laughed. “Uh, I won’t pick up my phone, but you can try calling my husband, Jake Gyllenhaal at (213) 406-6007.”
You laughed at his joke and continued watching. Some of the questions were interesting (What house is Tom Holland in? got him on a Harry Potter kick), but others just made you laugh some more (Is Tom Holland a dad? was a good one). 
“Is Tom Holland,” he read after laughing over the previous question, “dating anyone?”
You took a deep breath and let it out through your nose as Tom was able to maintain his poker face. “Tom Holland is enjoying his 20s right now,” he answered, “and he is very focused on his work. So you could say he is dating his career.”
Your mood shifted significantly after that question, and even though you continued watching the video, you enjoyed it much less. If you were any normal couple, he would’ve been able to say yes. Give the real answer. But this was you and Tom, and apparently the public wasn’t ready for that yet.
Just as you finished the video, as if he knew, Tom called you. You answered and tried to sound cheery. “Hi,” you said. “How’re you doing, Tommy?”
“Tired,” he answered honestly. “S’been a long day.”
“I’m sorry, love,” you said. Tom was quiet for a moment.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“What?” you said. “Nothing. What’re you talking about?”
“You sound upset,” he said.
“I’m not,” you said.
“What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” you said again. “I’m just tired, too.”
“Why’re you tired?”
“Can’t I just be tired?”
“You’re not usually tired.”
“Well today I am.”
“You’re lying.”
“Why do you think I’m lying?”
“Because I know you.”
“It’s fine, Tom.”
“(Y/N), just talk to me. I hate knowing you’re upset-”
“I’m not upset!” you shouted. You took a deep breath and sighed. “I just miss you. That’s all.”
He sighed as well. “I miss you too.”
“I was watching some of your interviews,” you told him.
“Yeah?” he said, his tone lightening up a little. “Which ones?”
“I just finished your Wired autocomplete,” you said.
“That’s always a fun one,” he said. “That board though-” He made a sound like he shivered. “-like a nail on chalkboard to me.”
You laughed dryly. “I know.” Tom was quiet for a moment.
“Can you talk to me?” he asked. You could tell he was hesitant, like he didn’t want to upset you any more than he already had. “There’s something else going on. I can tell.” You didn’t want to fight with him, so you decided to tell him the truth.
“I don’t want to hide our relationship anymore,” you said. “I’m tired.”
“(Y/N),” he said with a sigh. “We’ve talked about this.”
“And you tell me the same thing over and over again,” you said. “That you’re just not ready and that you don’t think I can handle it. I can handle it, Tom.”
“We’re not having this talk again.”
“Yes we are!” you said.
“(Y/N)-”
“In the interview, you said you’re dating your career,” you told him. “And you know what? That’s what it feels like sometimes! I feel like I’m falling to the backburner, because if I’m a secret, I don’t affect your career, and if it’s not about your career, then it doesn’t matter. Not to you. Not right now. You feel like a different person right now, like you’re living and breathing your work.”
“What, so you want me to stop?”
“Of course not,” you said. “Don’t be stupid. I just want you to be proud that we’re in this relationship. To value me as much as you value work.”
“I can’t just put down what I’m working on to make you feel important,” he said.
“That’s not what I’m asking you to do!”
“I’m not going to keep having this conversation with you,” he said. “This isn’t the first time you’ve brought this up, that I don’t care about you or this relationship or whatever. Frankly, (Y/N), I can’t handle this right now. Every time you bring it up it just raises my stress level. I can’t afford to be stressed right now.”
“So what does that mean?”
“It means if you really feel this way, then I’m done.”
“You’re done,” you repeated.
“Yeah,” he said. “I can’t keep babying you so you can feel secure in this relationship. I’m done.”
“Tom-”
The dial tone on the other end cut you off, and you felt tears come to your eyes. This hadn’t been your intention. You just wanted to have a conversation, and hopefully come to a better conclusion than you had every other time you brought it up. Maybe it was your fault. Maybe you should’ve just let it all be. Maybe you shouldn’t have mentioned it over the phone when he was busy with press. Maybe you had just lost the love of your life because of one rash decision.
You were quite young still. 21 wasn’t old. You still had your whole life ahead of you. But you were certain you and Tom were going to live happily ever after. So what were you supposed to do now?
You did the only thing you could think to do: call Niall.
Tom had gone golfing with Niall Horan a couple of times, and he would invite the Irishman over for dinner afterwards. You had been hanging out at Tom’s flat the first time he brought Niall over, and you were shocked when he walked through the door. You had always been a big fan of One Direction, and you were obsessed with Niall’s solo work. Luckily, after dating Tom for so long, you were a lot better at talking to famous people. Plus, Niall was crazy nice, and the two of you clicked instantly. After that, you considered him a good friend. A best friend actually.
So you gave him a call.
“‘Ello!” he said cheerily. “How’s it going?”
“Hey, Ni,” you said, your voice cracking. “You got a minute?”
“Always got a minute for you,” he said. “What’s wrong?” You opened your mouth only to close it again once you could tell you were about to break down into sobs. You sniffed a few times and finally composed yourself.
“Tom broke up with me,” you whispered.
“Ah, shit,” he said. You could hear him moving around a bit on his end. “You want me to come over?”
“Do you mind?” you asked, looking over at the clock. It was already 10:30.
“Course not,” he said. “I’ll be over in a bit.”
“I’ll leave it unlocked,” you said.
Niall was over in a few minutes, ready to lend a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear. “What happened?” he asked as you cuddled up to him on the couch.
“I just-” You were sniffing, practically blubbering. “I told him I was sick of, of keeping our relationship a secret. And that I didn’t want to keep, keep living in the shadows. He got mad, and, and he told me that he didn’t want to do it anymore.”
“Do what?”
“Have the same conversation we’ve been having,” you explained. “I bring it up all the time. I just want him to, to-” You cut yourself with a sigh. “I don’t know, Niall. I just felt like I was second best to all the work he’s been doing. And I’m not trying to sound unsupportive, but-”
“You don’t sound unsupportive,” he said. “Sounds like you want to be in a relationship that makes you happy, and Tom wasn’t doing that.”
“Most of the time he was,” you said. “But you know how he gets when he’s got a new role. It, it’s like it consumes him.” Niall just nodded and massaged the top of your head with his fingers.
“Maybe it’ll all work out,” he tried to offer. “Maybe it was just a fight.”
“We don’t ever fight like that,” you told him. “I try to be optimistic, but this is just-” You swallowed back more tears and shook your head. “This felt final.” Niall sighed and placed a kiss to the top of your head.
“You know I’m here for you,” he said. “However and whenever you need me.”
“I know,” you told him, putting your arm around his stomach to hold him closer. “Thank you.”
You spent every day with Niall for the next two months. He helped you move out from the flat you shared with Tom and let you stay with him until you could get back on your feet. You didn’t hear from Tom once. Niall was the perfect friend. He did everything he could to boost your spirits, constantly getting you ice cream or takeaway, and forcing you everyday to get out of bed and take a shower. He knew you well. Knew you’d mope and stop taking care of yourself if he let you. 
After two or so weeks went by, you forced yourself to put on a brave face. You didn’t want Niall to have to keep babying you. Tom wasn’t coming back, and there was nothing you could do about it. He hadn’t reached out to you once, and his Instagram stories were proof he was doing just fine. You were able to convince Niall you were okay with your fake laughs and pretty smiles.
Or so you thought.
Niall wasn’t dumb. Everyday, he saw you staring blankly at your black phone screen like you were waiting for it to light up with a call or text from Tom. He heard you crying in your room most nights, and he saw the redness rimming in your eyes every morning. He wasn’t sure you were even sleeping. But what was he supposed to do? He couldn’t reach out to Tom. He couldn’t help you if you didn’t want it. So he gave you space and let you recover however you needed to.
At the two month mark, Niall took you out for breakfast at your favorite cafe. You agreed eagerly, especially when he said he’d pay. In no world would you turn down a free breakfast.
Across town, Tom’s flight had just landed. He pulled out his phone and decided to scroll through some social media before Harrison picked him up. When he opened Instagram, he clicked through the stories of people he was following. He clicked through them absentmindedly, but his thumb froze when he saw a picture of you. You had your hands wrapped around a coffee cup and a huge smile on your face. Instantly, his heart dropped. Had you really moved on so soon? To Niall? He thought back to that day two months ago. The day he broke up with you. The worst day of his life.
“So what does that mean?” you asked him.
“It means if you really feel this way, then I’m done,” he said.
“You’re done,” you repeated.
“Yeah,” he said. “I can’t keep babying you so you can feel secure in this relationship. I’m done.”
“Tom-”
He hung up before you could finish your sentence and threw his phone against the wall. His case would protect it, he knew. He put his forehead in his hands and clenched his jaw. “Fuck!” he shouted. He meant what he said. He was sick of having the same conversation over and over again. He wasn’t ready to go public. End of story. Why did you keep having to push it? He just couldn’t handle it anymore. It was raising his stress level, and after filming his most recent movies, he couldn’t afford to be any more stressed than he already was.
Now, two months later, he was questioning everything. Had he overreacted? Deep down, he really thought you’d end up getting back together. That this was just a fight, and that you’d reach out to him. When months went by and you didn’t, he knew he had really fucked up. Maybe it was his place to reach out, but at this point, he felt like he didn’t have the right. You had already moved on. How could he just push his way into your life again?
But he had to. He had to talk to you. To say he was sorry. To get on his knees and beg to have you back, if it came to that. So, he made a snap decision. When Harrison brought him home, he asked if Tom wanted to hang out, but the ladder said no. He got in his car and headed off to Niall’s house.
You and Niall were sitting on the couch watching Harry Potter when there was a knock at the front door. You groaned and reached for the remote, but Niall just laughed. “Don’t pause it,” he said. “I’ll go check.”
“You’re going to miss Sirius’ death,” you said with a pout.
“Nothing I haven’t seen before,” he said back. You scoffed and nodded, adjusting the blanket you were using and turning back to the TV. You couldn’t hear who was at the door, but you could make out the muffled sounds of Niall speaking with someone.
When Niall opened the door, the last person he expected to see was Tom. Niall turned to look over his shoulder and make sure you hadn’t crept down the hall, and when he saw it was clear, he turned to his friend. “Hey,” he said awkwardly.
“Hey,” Tom said back, just as uncomfortable. “Is (Y/N) here?”
“Yeah,” Niall said. “She’s been staying with me since you two-” He cut himself off. Tom hung his head and ran a hand through his hair. “Listen, Tom, I don’t know if she’s ready to see you.”
“Come on, mate,” he said. “I’m begging you. Just let me talk to her.” Niall studied Tom. He could tell he was broken up, and he felt bad for his friend. But he felt bad for you too. He had been with you through all of this, and it hadn’t been a pretty picture. You still weren’t yourself, and he knew seeing Tom again would just bring you back to square one. But maybe you needed this closure. Who was he to stand in the way of that?
So he stepped to the side and let Tom in.
You heard footsteps approaching, so you turned to see who had stopped by. When you saw Tom, you sat up a little straighter. “What are you doing here?” you asked. Niall shoved his hands in his pockets and cleared his throat awkwardly. You shot him a glare.
“I’ll be in my room,” he said. Tom nodded, and Niall left you alone. You pulled the blanket a little closer to you like it could be a barrier between the two of you. Tom noticed and took a step closer to the couch so he could sit on the opposite end.
“What are you doing here?” you asked again.
“I just want to talk to you,” he said.
“About what?” you asked.
He hesitated. “You been living here long?”
“Since you broke up with me, yeah,” you said. “I needed a place to go.”
“So you moved on that quick?” he asked, his voice small. You raised your eyebrows.
“What does that mean?” you asked.
“I break up with you, and the next day you’re with Niall?”
“I’m not with Niall,” you snapped, realizing what he was implying. “I needed a home, Tom! You broke up with me! I had to move out! I couldn’t move back home, I couldn’t afford a place by myself! Niall was here for me!” Quickly, you added, “And even if I was with him, what right do you have to be upset about that? You broke up with me! At least Niall isn’t scared of posting pictures of me! Of people knowing who I am. You know how refreshing that is? I’ve been hidden for two years. Going out in public with Niall is like-” You let out a dry laugh. “It was like a breath of fresh air.”
“Well, then be with Niall!” Tom shouted. He was getting frustrated, but more with himself than with you. He deserved everything you were saying, and it just made him mad at himself.
“I don’t want to be with Niall!” you shouted back. “I don’t love Niall! I love you! But you didn’t want to make it work!”
“I never said that!” Tom said.
“You didn’t want to take the next step!” you said. “You, you keep hiding me, Tom! Why are you so ashamed of me?” Tom didn’t answer for a moment, too taken aback by your words.
“Is that what you think?” he said. “That I’m ashamed of you?”
“I don’t understand why else you would hide me like you had for two years,” you said.
He started stuttering through his response. “(Y/N), I’ve, I’m, it’s not that at all.” You didn’t say anything, and he sighed. “I’m scared of what could go wrong.” You furrowed your eyebrows and shook your head.
“I don’t understand,” you said.
“It’s easy right now, you know?” he said. “It’s easy, and it’s safe, and there’s no chance of someone hurting you or you getting, getting too overwhelmed by everything.” It still wasn’t clicking to you.
“I don’t understand,” you said. “So, so you-” You sighed and pressed your fingers to your temples. “Why didn’t you just talk to me about it? Instead of shutting me down every time I brought it up?”
“I don’t know,” he muttered. “I just wasn’t ready to talk about it.”
“Jesus, Tom,” you said, feeling a lump rise in your throat. “You’re ridiculous.”
“I’m sorry,” he said softly. “If I could take it all back, I would.” You looked at him just as he lifted his head to look at you. His eyes were brimmed with tears, and you knew yours were too.
“I won’t be in the shadows anymore,” you told him. “I won’t.”
“I know,” he said. “I swear, you won’t be anymore. I’ll tell everyone. I’ll shout it from the rooftops, whatever you want.” You couldn’t help but giggle a bit, which made Tom’s face light up. “Move back in with me?” he asked. Your smile dropped a fraction, and you looked down at your hands.
“Can I stay here a while longer?” you said. “If it’s okay with Niall? I just-” You sighed. “I just want to take this slow moving forward. I need time to, to get back to where we were. I still love you,” you added, “but I just-” You took a shaky breath. “I’m not there yet.” Tom nodded in understanding.
“Okay,” he said. “Whatever you need. Just-” He moved a little closer to you and stroked your cheek with the back of his hand. “-know that I love you so much, and however you want to go public, I’m game.” You nodded, and Tom smiled and leaned forward, hoping you’d meet him halfway for a kiss. You did. He smiled against your lips and put his hand on the back of your head, keeping you close to him.
You pulled away from each other when you heard a dramatic clearing of the throat. You turned your head and saw Niall leaning against the doorframe with his arms across his chest. “I see you lovebirds patched things up,” he said. You and Tom both chuckled, and Tom hung his head as the tips of his ears turned pink.
“Is it okay if I stay a little longer?” you asked Niall.
He nodded without hesitation. “Stay as long as you need.” He paused. “You guys wanna get some food?” Tom looked at you, and you bit your lip and hung your head.
“I think we might head back to my place for a while,” he said. “You know, catch up a little bit.”
“Ah, ah, ah,” he said, covering his ears. “I don’t need to hear anymore. I get the picture.”
You and Tom said goodbye to Niall, and as soon as the door shut, Niall put his hands on his hips and sighed. He thought for a moment and reached into his pocket for his phone, clicking on the first contact name that came to his mind.
“Tommo! You up for some Nandos?”
----- ----- ----- -----
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