#but I still ended up sobbing
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#yesterday was both Día de los Muertos and 二七��#I just combined them for my prayers#but I still ended up sobbing#still exhausted today#I’m not typically religious#nor am I a ‘beleiver’ of any faith#but this just feels so important to me to see these 49 days through
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the difference between till at the start of round 6 and round 7
he doesn't seem like he's trying at all during round 6, having already fully given up living after losing mizi
but in round 7, even though he's lost even more, he's clearly putting all he has left into it
and the reason for that... has to be ivan, right?
he must have recognized ivan sacrificed himself for him, so for the sake of ivan's feelings till tries his absolute best to respond to them and perform that till sings at all here is for ivan
...but at the same time ivan is what haunts him
obviously, right? there's no way watching someone you were so close to you die like that right in front of you can give you actual "strength" (and this isn't even getting into the kiss...) contrary to ivan's (clearly wrong) conviction that till doesn't care enough for him to become a trauma to him, that's exactly what happens
this inextricable mix of love and hate, hurting and healing... this is the tragedy of their relationship to the end no matter how much ivan and till care for each other, they can't ever cure each other
#ivantill#alien stage#alnst#alnst till#alnst ivan#blink gone#i thought it was kind of sad ivan only showed up so far into the vid#then i realized#his presence is right there from the start isn't it#no matter what ivantill will always be attached to each other...#they died on the same day.#ivan really did haunt till for the rest of his life!! (sobbing)#also a note on tillmizi#since mizi is what actually gives till strength at the end#(yknow. by BEING ALIVE. UNLIKE SOMEONE ELSE--#but... his love for mizi is built on this idealistic fantasy... as simple and pure as it is#he still doesn't truly /know/ mizi to the end#so of course that can't be enough either#the way alnst explores 'love' is so... so... So........
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they just want to be one...
commissions @jolyonvane did for me where i asked if he could please please please make stan look as desperate and exhausted as he usually does but is being kept together by all his love for his sbf kyle
#south park#sp style#THANK YOU AGAIN AND FOREVER JOLY!!!!🫶💫#also around the time i comms this i was inspired by @stancsh's post about the necklaces AND THEN spencers released the stankyle ones.......#literally like... stankyle only forever and ever always#i had planned on just on piece but i was sent so many beautiful and amazing sketches 😭 i had to ask for two to be finished at least !!#i really love joly's art and animations and i think i still wouldve ended up a stan girlie but seeing that high animatic?? LIFE CHANGING#and just 🤧🤧🤧 means so much to me he accepted my stanky comm and theyre so <33333333#kyle is holding stan so delicately and carefully and like every touch is so so meaningful and can break and put stanley back togetherrr#sob so much love here💘💘#their necklaces connected in the second one??!!!! they both look so pretty and SO IN LOVE#stanley is like so puppy dog down bad heart eyes i love you i love you do you love me? and kyle is like of course i love you i got you.#WAAAAAUUGHHH AND THEN THEIR COLORS and keeping each other so close...on them#LOOK AT THEM!!!! loooook theyre so??? fhdjkjhjs ough in. the mood for..love.....and stans tummy<333#i seriously love stanky so so much ;; 💙💚
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Madoka is the promise you won't turn from a child, full of hopes and dreams and the wish to save the world, into a bitter adult who just wants to hurt others and ruin people's lives
Madoka promised to be there for you to remind you of the person you wanted to be and to stop you from becoming what you sought to destroy
Madoka made that promise and became the very embodiment of it
#Moon posting#Feeling emotional about Madoka Magica all out of the blue and I'm making it your problem#IDK I saw a video in my YT reccs ranking Doremi toys and I really enjoyed it (sadly can't remember who it was)#So I went to check what other content the person had made and they had recently-ish done a blind reaction to Madoka#Didn't watch the whole thing just The Good Shit at like double speed (it was completely uncut and I wasn't in the mood for a full rewatch)#And god. The way the fucking ending to this series still makes me fucking sob like a baby EVEN WHEN WATCHING AT DOUBLE SPEED#I dunno what to tell you I really like that series. Like I just do. Madoka is Good Actually#IDK I feel like everyone has a lot of Opinions about the series and all I can say is that y'all are wrong and don't understand it#MADOKA ISN'T ABOUT BEING EDGY GRIMDARK TORTURE PORN!!! IT'S ABOUT HOPE!! AND DREAMS!! AND NOT GIVING UP!!#Y'all remember that post about how sometimes if you need to imagine Naruto encouraging you to help you get out of bed and brush your teeth#Then you imagine that dattebayo#And that is literally what Madoka is.#Except instead of self-care Madoka is there to stop you from being a toxic little dickweed and be nice to others#Sometimes you need to stop and ask: Would Madoka do that? Would Madoka say that? Would she be proud of me right now?#Don't ask me why I'm posting this it is 5 am I should be in bed man
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12 year old tim realizing robin’s not coming back to gotham and deciding that it’s Batman’s fault so he has to ruin the little bit of sanity and peace of mind Bruce has managed (read: struggled) to keep in his grasp:
#tim drake#dick grayson#robin#dc robin#bruce wayne#batman#tim drake is a menace#tim drake was and still is a die hard Robin fan before anything else#so he 100% thinks Damian’s funny when he’s not the one being targeted#there’s mission reports with comments in the margin like ‘nice 👍🏾 do it again’ and ‘650000000/10 🎉’ and Bruce hates it sm#it starts with a mild explosion and psychological fuckery and ends with a prank war with city wide structural damage#Bruce sees Tim and Damian getting along and starts sobbing in the batcave#It was 12 year old Tim Drake and his 67 alt twitter accs against the world (Batman) when dick left#For the two years dick refused to stay in Gotham I promise you batman’s anonymous tip line was just 325 ruthless insults from tim everyday#Imagine bruce trying to figure out which of his rogues keeps photoshopping terrible .5s of Batman then mailing it to the gcpd#just to find out it’s some fucking middle schooler with a bowlcut from bristol#Tim drake is unhinged and petty#Like it gets so bad that gothamites (even the rogues) have picked a side in this mostly one sided beef between a middle schooler and batman#I want internet beef between a middle schooler and a 29 year old med school dropout bruce ‘I am the night’ wayne#Bruce is foaming at the mouth whenever someone opens Twitter next to him#and batman is breaking your clavicle if you mention twitter in his hearing range 😭#Batman showing up at Tim’s windowsill: take down all your accounts rn and im calling your parents 😡🦇#Tim pulling out a ouija board: let’s see if your parents answer before mine 🤨#I made yj on the sims so they could fight the jl and I was like middle school!tim drake w/ a twitter acc???
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new kids in town 😳
(bonus ver without omori ui under the cut)
#end roll#russell seager#chris (end roll)#omori#my art#gif#when a haha casual fun little idea ends up taking three and a half days of continuous work HELP#and i still ended up having to give up on a decent few details of the style#i am. never attempting to imitate the enemy sprites ever again#but i think it turned out pretty decent at least sob#also my sibling pointed out that i'm making my two faves from both games fight each other 😭#not the ship crossover concept i envisioned help—#IT'S A CASUAL AND SAFE SCHOOL-FRIENDLY BRAWL IT'S OK
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"I'm so tired," he whispers into your hair as he holds you close, arms tightening around your waist as you lay together on the bed. "Exhausted even."
"Sleep baby," you whisper back, a soft smile gracing your lips as your fingers run through his hair gently. "You've already done enough."
And just like that, the peaceful ebb and flow of the ocean waves lull you both to sleep.
"Rest."
#this new episode has me in shambles#SHAMBLES#this is how that episode ended#this is the only ending i accept#thank you#the way he still cares about fushiguro and maki and nobara#IM SOBBING#like sweetie please rest#nanami kento#nanami kento x reader#jjk nanami#nanami x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu sorcerer#jujustsu kaisen x reader#AND ITADORI#FUCK#THAT WAS SO MESSED UP
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i do a light chuckle once i remember hofmann and semmelweis are friends but then i remember semmelweis and marcus' suitcase interaction where they talk about her and i am once again inconsolable about this old woman's death
#reverse 1999#semmelweis#greta hofmann#certified storm moments#i miss hofmann so bad i know ill start sobbing when someone brings her up again in chapter 7#r1999 shitpost#i still think their canon ages are bullshit and theyre both older than canon in my head but yeah semmelweis is half hofmann's age (19 to 38#bluepoch i prommy you won't start profusely bleeding income if you make a character older than their mid twenties. i promise you that#nothing more but hofweis rambling after this you have been warned#anyways you mightve seen me here or there mention that i ship these two and. yes the age gap is a central theme to how i percieve them#semmelweis lived the dream (see how i say this in past tense) she bagged that old woman </3#the inherent angst of your partner being so much younger than you and close to death thanks to a terminal illness yet in the end#its actually you that dies first. and she ends up finding a cure to illness and ending up immortal. something something 'i will never see#how old age looks on you. you are breaking my heart.' and how it applies to both of their perspective towards the other#one went to vienna to (unknowingly) die and the other went there to live#koshka-sova said it best its a pair that dances round life and death. and can't forget about the inherent workplace yuri#also its funny thinking of marcus unwittingly finding out through either her arcane skill or some other method her mentor's coworker-friend#got it on with her. like i think the two start bonding because of hofmann but then one day marcus approaches her with haunted eyes and#shakily goes 'd...did you. did you and madam hofmann..? my arcane skill said. that you and. did you two......?'
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Ok I mean absolutely no offence to anyone but;
All the people saying that making Susan a villain would be a bold move - have you SEEN the classic series??? This autistic teenage girl has more feral energy than any other companion except perhaps Leela and was TERRIFYING when she wanted to be. She tried to stab Ian and Barbara. She fucked up a bunch of cavemen and put a human skull on a flaming torch for comedic effect.
Not to MENTION the amount of trauma that girl has. Time War? Losing her entire family twice/three times?? (Because she'd have outlived her human family on Earth. The third family is Team TARDIS btw). Abandonment issues??? It's not a huge leap to assume that something traumatic happened on Gallifrey, given how she acts. She's also related to the Timeless Child - god knows how many times she's regenerated - for all we know, she discovered a long time ago that she is incapable of dying, and she has no idea why. Couple that with violent tendencies and an extreme talent for telepathy (even the Doctor was surprised by how strong her abilities were) and you've got an extremely messed up character.
Make Susan the villain! Show kids that if life fucks you up, sometimes you fuck up too, and that doesn't mean you're unworthy of love! Have her commit atrocities to try and get the Doctor to come back to her! Let her fuck shit up!
#doctor who#classic who#classic doctor who#susan foreman#15th doctor#the one who waits#Yeah I still stand by that#Susan being The One Who Waits would be WAY more hard-hitting than Sutekh#Waiting for the Doctor to come back and he never did#Anyway Susan is psychologically fascinating as a character let her do bad things let her fuck shit up let her be insane!!!!#And then at the end of the episode have the Doctor talk her down have him love her anyway have him hug her and tell her that it's ok#he's here now#and I will sob my eyes out!!!!!! In a good way!!!!!!!!!#Yes I have severe psychological issues what's your point
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never being anyone’s best friend or the most important person in anyone’s life, ever, can really fuck you up emotionally
#like throughout my life i’ve had people that i’d call my best friends#but I guess I was never theirs#like they always had more important friends that would always take precedence#and then now as an adult people’s partners always take precedence#which is fair and valid#I just can’t never find that for myself and always end up as an afterthought and it really really fucks you up#hence me sobbing rn#bc a friend and I were supposed to call tonight and had scheduled it a few days ago#aaaand they just told me they can’t because they’re still on a call with their partner who’ve they’ve called basically everyday this week#oh and this friend won’t be able to call anyone all summer so I just can’t talk to them on the phone again until fall#and yeah i’m sobbing rn#rants and rambles#friends#long distance friendship#lonliness#friendship#no friends#friend jealousy#never had a best friend#friendless#how to keep friends#i dont know how to make friends#friend yearning
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Counterspell
[First] Prev <--> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#MDZS#season 1#wei wuxian#lan xichen#lan wangji#lan jingyi#lan sizhui#I ended up cutting out *three* comics from my notes because its was basically all the same punchline (WWX is sobbing pathetic and wet)#he spends nearly this whole episode wailing and frankly good for him#Don't get me wrong; the VA absolutely *crushes* the performance#I am obsessed by the little 'WEH' he does at the end of Special Ep No#but as much as i wanna draw it I DO need to move this series along#I *love* this flavour of WWX (trying to be extremely abrasive on purpose (failing)) there's a lot of good humour here#I feel like i could have drawn out this *whole* episode for how many good moments there are...but alas...#Anyways. you guys ever think about how the juniors have to witness their HGJ breaking character to bully this random guy#yet also tolerate a lot of disrespect and still treat him with respect?#it would be like watching your principal lie on his desk twirling his phone cord and kicking his feet. what do you even *say*?
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"I always wanted my friends to call me Gerry."
He never stayed in one place growing up. He could never bring himself to stay in the surface world. He stayed with Gertrude, as long as he could, but even that was lonely and dangerous and terrifying. And he never trusted her. He never trusted his mother. He never knew his father. He never had anyone he could rely on.
The last person he would ever speak to... and he finally decided that he'd found a friend.
Just... rest.
#tma#the magnus archives#gerard keay#genuinely teared up writing this. the more i think about him the more i want to start sobbing#and yet he helped so many people. so rarely does he show up in a statement and not save someone#he did his best to make his body his own given the lack of stability. it was still taken from him in the end#yet... he decided jon was his friend. someone like him. thrown into a world he wanted no part of and trapped there#being dragged along by currents he could not know towards and end that couldn't be predicted but that must be terrible#long after he should have gone from the world forever and just as he made the final choice to leave. he found a friend#gerry keay#i guess is also his tag#ok i need to make tea before i cry
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honestly it's just funny to me when people are like "aziraphale had to be talked into even trying to save the earth blah blah blah" trying to make him out to be a Bad Person. meanwhile in canon it took like, 1.5 conversations and less than a day because he DID want to do it and jumped on the first feasible idea.
and then they conveniently ignore that he spends the rest of season one actively continuing to do everything in his power that he can think of to save the earth, despite every obstacle and despite CROWLEY actively saying they should give up on that and run away together instead
(which all these same people conveniently... never seem to mention or frame as crowley being a Bad Person. the same way they never seem to try to frame him calling aziraphale stupid or his little "i'm leaving forever and when i'm gone i'll never even THINK ABOUT YOU AGAIN" moment as him being a bad person, instead suddenly being much more willing to sympathize and give him the benefit of the doubt. hmm go figure).
like he literally tries to talk to GOD up close and personal to change her mind. he throws down his uniform, refuses the war, and goes AWOL back to earth determined to save it, even knowing that he's pretty much signing up to lose EVERYTHING that he's built on earth for himself, even thinking he possibly lost crowley already by pushing him away, like.
when satan is en route to the airbase, wouldn't you know, crowley is the one who says it's over we're fucked there's nothing we can do and aziraphale is the one who says no, we can't give up now after everything, and gives crowley the push he needs to buy them some time.
i'll never say he's a perfect uwu bean or that he always goes about things the right way but like, this weird thing (especially post s2) where people try to project some different character onto him just never goes over. he's not self-absorbed or callous or power-hungry or stupid or too naive or completely selfish. fundamentally.
also he wouldn't take angel crowley over modern crowley. he loves crowley in every capacity and every form and through every change and tbh like. he understands that those aren't actually two completely separate entities, and crowley is one person who's been through so much and had to change so much, and he loves all of him.
their relationship is not toxic or abusive. they understand each other in ways nobody else ever will. they push each other to be better and appreciate each other for everything that they are, that they have been, that they could be, and they continually choose to come back to each other no matter what fight they have or challenge they face.
every day i gotta get out here like you know you can just like the character crowley better... and relate to him more... without having to twist around to justify it as some moral superiority thing. like that's fine and normal, to just like a character better than a different character and focus on them more.
#good omens#aziraphale#ineffable husbands#long post#im simply tired of the takes i think like no sorry guys crowley doesnt ~deserve better~#no aziraphale doesnt need to suffer to ~deserve him~ and sob and beg and go through hell while crowley slams the door in his face#they broke up like TWICE in s1 after having big arguments and saying hurtful things to each other and crowley still like.#immediately went to try to save aziraphale when he thought he was in danger. they both love each other they both want each other safe#despite their differences in how to approach that and what it means (which will always come to a head a bit tbh)#(bc they are each others biggest priority and not themselves)#if there's anything to forgive about the final 15 crowley has done it already. it's past. he never wants az to suffer.#idk the end iguess
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OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever
#jrwi fanart#cw blood#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#arthur bennett#OUHH THIS ONE WAS SITTING IN MY WIPS FOR SO LOOOONGwhen i took it out there was mould on it :sob:#BUT i think i was able to fix it up okay#i keep seeing SO MANY MISTAKES RRAAAHHH BUT YOU DONT SEE THEM RIGHT?? THATS ONLY ME. RIGHT?? EXACTLY.#THE KEY IS TO SAY. AND REPEAT AFTER ME. 'FUUUCK IT WE BALL#so anyway. arthur bennett huh? grizzly says that arthur is reaal fuckin difficult to play. and i SUPER get that. i mean LOOK AT HIM..#grizz often needs a minute to think abt what hes gonna say in a way that matches w that Stoic Personality. which is FAIR but also that#ends up making way for awkward confrontations like: the lady in the parky lot. he took too long to answer and scared her away.& I LOVE THAT#arthur is tragic and sad and cool and stoic but hes ALSO awkward and silly and kinda dumb and short sighted. HE HAS COMPLEXITIES#I LOVE WHEN TTRPG CHARACTERS HAVE A GOOD SET OF SHORTCOMINGS. ESPECIALLY WHEN U FIND THEM ONLY AS U PLAY THEM.#I COULd go on and on saying the same things w different words abt arthurs intriguing and entertaining character but i shall spare u. for no#ILL ALSO MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE HIS FLAVOR THO.. I LOVE TALL HOT BOY WHOS ONE W THE DARKNESS.. I REMEMBER WHEN HE FIRST MENTIONED THE#BADLUCK. N I WAS LIKE OOOHH THATS WHY HIS DESIGN IS SO COOL N CHAOTIC N ASYMMETRICAL. HES UNLUCKY!!! i love love love his design so much...#GRaaauruguguraguhhghghgh what else what else is there for me to spew on abt...i think im reachin a limit here..OH MAGNUS. i hope that#we get to know more abt how magnus and arthur met.. like How they became besties... ouuhh... I ALSO WANNA KNOW MORE ABT MARY DAVIS. LIKEHOW#he also apparently spent alotta time in a zone dominated by edward twilight? all he remembers is constant partying? I WANNA KNOW MORE..#i think i got room 4 one more ramble SO. THE ART PIECE.as i said its gone a lil stale BUT. im still very proud o the bits where hes allScar#I WANNA SEE HIM GET SCARYMORE. I like the idea of shadows solidifying to make him strange and eerie.like TEETH n CLAWS n SPINES n YESS#also the SILVER EYES.no1 does silver eyes like the show Claymore. they make em look so striking and eerie...i also like to think that#human arthur had deep beautiful brown eyes.just in my beaitufl heart.i mean look at him..i wanna cook him n eat him.ANYWAY#i think thats all my ramblin for this piece. now i gotta go cancel a single day i had ata hotel bc my work schedule change last minute FUCK#feel free to ramble in my tags aswell tho i read all of them and i chew on thenm and i love them so sos os mcuh
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HE ALMOST SURRENDERS TO THE KISS
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO SURRENDER TO THE KISS
IM SOBBING
#did I post abt this yet#I've had this in my mind for over a year now but ig I forgot to mention it here lol#no but I'm actually sobbing the way he did want to give in and kiss alice but decided against it to save her ☹️☹️#its not that obvious in the vid bc it all happens so quickly but u could see him soften up a bit after alice's line like :(#also semi side note I read a fic once years ago where alfred wasnt able to stop alice from kissing him in time and so they just wait the#sickness out together and it absolutely BROKE ME#give them their happy ending PLEASE#also for some reason a bunch of my abh libretto posts are getting traction again after almost a year#and out of all of em the stoned post is the most popular lmao#I love that there's still active members in this fandom#hi guys this is for yall <3#I should post abt abh more#alice spencer#alfred hallam#abh#alice by heart#doggo rambles
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Kafka Hibino
Kafka Hibino.... with visible salt and pepper side burns.
Kafka Hibino.... wearing glasses and has salt and pepper side burns.
Kafka HIbino.... in that black turtleneck and a dark brown leather jacket and also wearing glasses and has salt and pepper side burns.
Kafka Hibino.... wearing that outfit and is an Animal Biology Professor in an College Au.
Kafka Hibino..... asking out Hoshina who is an Advanced Mathematics Professor working at the same college, to have an after-work drink with him.
Slightly DRUNK Kafka Hibino... becoming very forward with an also slightly drunk Hoshina
Slightly Drunk Hoshina... immediately matching Kafka's freak tenfold and Kafka is very much fine with this.
#My Brain: Ohhh! What if we also make it a Yakuza AU and Kafka has tattoos and is an-#Me: *Slaps my brain and watches it jiggle like a domed jello cake* NO! No no no no no NO!!!#Me: *To my brain* YOU HAVE SIX FANFICS TO FINISH!#THREE Kn8 FICS : TWO OF WHICH ARE NOW MULTI-CHAPTERED!#TWO RONTOTO FICS: ONE OF WHICH YOU HAVE STARTED!#AND A MDUD FIC THAT YOU STARTED AND HAVE HAD THE ENDING PLANNED OUT FOR OVER TWO MONTHS NOW#THAT YOU HAVEN'T WRITTEN IT BECAUSE YOU CAN'T BE PATIENT ENOUGH TO FIGURE OUT THE MIDDLE!#My Brain: *sobs* Bu-But *Sniffs* I wanna write about Isao being a Yakuza Director General...#Me: . . .#Me: *Puts Brain in an industrial juicer in an attempt to make it behave*#with that out of the way#Professor Kafka (Trying) to act like a sorta beast-like dom Seme archetype toward Hoshina ( it kinda works)#Only for Hoshina to Unleash The Crazy#And Kafka just switches gears and (happily) accepts his new position as the bottom.#If I make it through the ones above#I MIGHT; MIGHT! make a short story about Ex-yakuza Professor Kafka and his budding relationship with fellow professor Hoshina#really just the idea of Suped Up Kafka and some of his Kaiju feats-#being translated to a more normal version of Kafka and just chalking up some insane shit to Yakuza training and adrenaline#like he' still goofy and shit- just recontextualized into a crouching dumbass/ hidden BADASS.#is what's fueling the desire to keep this in my backlogs for a later date#LEGIT: I ALREADY have a scene (In my head) where he flips a VAN onto its side#But then BRUSHES OFF A HEAD WOUND THREE MINUTES LATER#AND LATER GETS STABBED AND IS MORE OR LESS FINE#TWO WHOLE SCENES WHERE HES SURROUNDED BY- LIKE- TEN GUYS! KNOCKS ALL ASSES FLAT!!!!#WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME??!?!?!?!?!!?#kaiju no. 8#kafka hibino#soshiro hoshina#kafhoshi#kn8
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