#brownies are attempted

[azure-clockwork]

The idiots are at it again, this time with some help from Dorothea! There are brownies in this story, technically.

[heavenstarship]

i'm sure he'll be fine

[romance-rambles]

do you think...would luke feel weird about emma marrying gilbert? they're supposed to be close in age, while gilbert is probably the closest thing he has to a father figure, despite having maybe a max of a decade between them?

then there's also, uh, the elephant in the room

anyways, i can see some angst about where exactly luke slots into this mess of a family. to their kids, is he uncle luke? big brother luke? but, like, it's emma so he probably has to concede that she's good for him, right? idk i feel like that probably makes him feel worse.

[i haven't read gil's route yet]

[deansmom]

The fact that the spn fandom is entirely incapable of a nuanced discussion involving Dean and the relationship with his mother shouldn’t surprise me as much as it did when I came back to fandom, and as much as it still does when I’m forced to see it with my own two eyeballs

Mary Winchester was a person before she was a mother, and I’m going to be so honest with you, I think by the time she died, John didn’t like who that person was. So I think when she died, he did what a lot of people do, which is put the person they lost on a pedestal. And that’s who Dean grew up hearing about, that’s what all of his memories of his mom were contextualized with, this person who didn’t exist. And so then his mom comes back and I think it’s very, very clear to Dean almost immediately that this isn’t the same person John told him about.

In the real world, we have no context to draw from and nothing to compare it to, the experience of getting a dead parent back and to be part of your life again. We can’t know how he felt beyond what we were shown in canon - So of course Dean is thrilled, but he’s also a Winchester and deeply traumatized, and tries so hard to make it seem normal and not internalize his complicated feelings about her and her being alive. He’s dealing with:

Grappling with losing the mother he was told she was and resenting mary for it because she’s standing in front of him

Realizing that John robbed so much from him by denying him the version of his mother who feels like looking in a mirror

The guilt of how and why mary is there

Trying to reconcile his feelings of resentment and anger that he knows should be directed at John, but John’s not there, so they end up getting directed at mary, and feeling bad about that

A deeply traumatized inner child who has his safe person back, and just wants his mom to hold him and tell him it’s going to be okay, but he knows that isn’t fair to ask of her

And meanwhile mary was dealing with

✨trauma��� from being brought back to life

Having to confront her own failures as a parent (which is silly it’s not her fault she died but y’know, feelings tend to be silly)

Having to reconcile her toddler with the man in front of her who’s older than her being her son

Seeing so much of John’s worst qualities in both of them and recognizing the trauma of a shitty dad

The fact that they had this idea of who she was, and it’s nothing like her at all, and trying to understand why John would lie to them while also probably coming to terms with what looks like confirmation of her own worst fears about who she was as a parent

I cannot stress this enough: the last time her feet touched the ground, she had been married, with a new baby, and a 4 year old, she wasn’t a hunter, John barely knew about hunting, and it was the 80’s. She woke up in what, 2017 and her husband’s dead, her babies are grown men (again: older than her!!!) and the most prolific hunters in the world. Oh, also, angels? God? The afterlife?? Funny story! Like I’m sorry, you wanted her to have well-adjusted coping skills for that????

The Mary hate just gets me because she’s Dean in a different font, and so many of y’all hate her for such superficial bullshit that you could let go of if you took 5 seconds to think about the situation critically for both of them. The only bad guy here is, was and will always be John Winchester. John was there, but Mary tried her best. Mary tried to do what was best for them when she left, because she didn’t want to damage their idea of who she was anymore than she had. Mary literally died trying to save Sam from the destiny that heaven had written for him - John couldn’t be bothered to think about his kids.

And if you think that Dean ever genuinely hated Mary, your critical thinking skills need some work. The thing that prompts his speech in 12.22 is Mary saying to his younger self, “I only want good things for you, Dean. I'll never let anything bad happen to you.” So he says

I hate you. And I love you. 'Cause I can't – I can't help it. You're my Mom. And I understand...'cause I have made deals to save the ones I love more than once.

I forgive you. I forgive you. For all of it. Everything. On the other side of this, we can start over, okay? You, me, Sam. We can get it right this time. But I need you to fight. Right now, I need you to fight. I need you – I need you to look at me, Mom. I need you to really look at me and see me. Mom, I need you to see me. Please.

Translation: “you’re right. I resent you for not being the person I was sold, I resent you for your death being the thing that ruined dad, I resent you for being the touchstone for so many of heaven’s plans for us. I resent you because you’re here, and John isn’t, and it’s easier to hate someone tangible than someone dead. And if I hate you, it’s only because I can see so much of myself in you, and I’m so incredibly angry that John treated us the way he did. My whole world, my whole identity revolves around you being someone that you never were, and wrapping my head around that is scary, but when I pull my head out of my ass and look around, you were just a kid. And you did your best, you’ve always tried to do what’s best for me and Sam, and I don’t hate you. I don’t know if I like you right now because you’re a stranger, which is scary - but I love you. So please, mom, I’m sorry that I’ve been taking my bullshit out on you. Just… try. For me. Please.”

Anyways!!! You guys don’t deserve Mary.

[jdkyang]

Day 1: summer break with Carlando

this's how i imagine their summer break to look like

[estrogenism]

idk i wish people would talk more about papua when it comes to occupied nations.

free papua.

[amurder-ofcrows]

just pulled some brownies i made out of the oven and i kinda over corrected from last time i made them. i forgot to put in my baking powder last time (as b dylan hollis would say, my floofers) because i was working on my baking skills muscle memory instead of directly from the recipe and just forgot, and i used a 13x9 pan so they were pretty flat. this time, i remembered the baking powder but i also used a 9x9 instead and uhhh ive made a brownie cake. this thing is like almost two inches thick. it is fully cooked though!

note to self: stop thinking you know what you’re doing when it comes to baking. you may have been doing this for years and have recipes you could bake when you’re asleep, but brownies are not one of them

[rickybaby]

me when I see the short shorts 🥰

me when I realize that guy is a comedian with a podcast 🫥😩🚫

Not here to moralise about who Daniel hangs out with because all men, especially rich white men, are problematic but Daniel can laugh all he wants at unfunny jokes in private, far far away from a microphone because I wouldn’t survive another barrage of ✨discourse✨

[santir0sales]

i finally had success in making brownies

[shinelikethunder]

i made it one entire episode into that new mike flanagan thing without wanting to go final girl on his ass with a tire iron, but HOW do you flub a ~bleedingly topical~ masque of the red death adaptation that badly in this time of plagues, not to mention the wealthy hellbent on insulating themselves from risks they'd sell the rest of us out to for one corn chip. like what in the catholic-ass, slut-shaming, voyeuristic, moralistic, depraved-bisexual fuck did i just watch, and what on earth did it have to do with all the poe it keeps namechecking

[the-sun-is-also-a-star]

we're gonna see if i give myself diabetes from the frankly obscene amount kf sugar i put in those things

[rainbowangel110]

GUESS WHO MADE SOME BROWNIES :D

[daaft-prick-69]

First attempt. It was a bit bitter coz of too much dark chocolate and less sugar.

[fortjester]

the fic ive written in my head of gideon & all the other lyctor cav’s ending up trapped in a river bubble house together is so funny. wish i could actually write it

[littlebitofbluelittlebitofcoffee]

Brownie bites with blackberry syrup on top