#bonus points if it sounds like something the narrator would say

[give-soup-please]

hello before i send the next ask i would like to inquire as to whether or not youre okay with getting flirted with (mostly jokingly... unless...?) (badly tho, definitely badly and ineffectively)

...this is one of the funniest asks i've ever gotten. you are more than welcome to flirt, i don't have a partner at the moment. and to be honest, i really, really appreciate the checking for consent before going for it, that's a green flag.

all i ask is that you leave NSFW content out of it, too many people have sexualized me nonconsensually already. but yeah, have fun, and feel free to boost my ego as you see fit. (channeling inner narrator here)

also who the hell is wanting to flirt with me? y'all have bizarre tastes in men (...me too. the narrator content i produce speaks for itself)

i'm sure you know the rules. be courteous, be polite, try not to say anything scary.

[eevees-hobbies]

Suo and Umemiya’s words of praise please (bonus points if you a bad bitch in the streets but a soft one in the sheets)

Author’s Note: Thank you for the thirst/ask, anon! I am not ashamed to admit that I was lightheaded by the end of writing this! I hope the formatting doesn't come out too wonky as I try and figure out how I want my anon thirsts/asks to look!

Content Warning: Fem!Reader x Hajime Umemiya, Fem!Reader x Hayato Suo, smut, making out, fingering, mention of overstimulation, and oral. Minors Do Not Interact.

Word Count: 1.4K

They Whisper About You in the Streets, You Know?

General Background of You

You realized early on that you needed to be able to protect yourself as a citizen of Makochi. It pissed you off seeing the level of delinquency that created chaos and ultimately terrorized the members of the community. You grew up here, and there’s no way you would be intimidated by a bunch of low-lives or run out of your town. 

You’ve built up a larger-than-life reputation for yourself, outfitting your business with security cameras, motion detectors and arming yourself with a right-hook that could put almost anyone on their ass. The only people who fuck with you now are people who either haven’t recieved the message or are too dumb to save.

Hajime Umemiya

Umemiya had met you while out on one of his patrols. You were very well aware of him, and what he meant to Makochi as the previous leader of Bofurin, so you went out to greet him. He was as pleasant as many of the townsfolk had said and just as handsome, too. You exchanged pleasantries for a few minutes–him asking what you sold in your shop and you asking what he liked to do in his spare time. Talking about simple things felt silly, but small talk was your way of continuing a conversation you didn’t want to end.

As he finally turned to leave, he stopped and faced you again: “Hey, if anyone gives you any trouble, I can always stop by and…help.”

Umemiya internally berated himself. Help?! Why not say something cool, like beat them up, or anything that doesn’t make you sound like a middle-aged dad? But he found you so cute; the way you wore an apron around your waist so you didn’t dirty your adorable clothes, the way he towered over you, and how you were biting your lip as you looked at him with big doe eyes. You were endearing to him, and he’d grasp at straws to find a way to talk to you again.

He expected a shy thank you or a cute smile in his direction, but what he got instead was even better—you snorted.

“If anyone gives YOU any trouble, let me know, and I’ll come by and kick their asses.” You ended your sentence with a perfectly timed wink and returned to the interior of your shop.

You didn’t witness this, but Umemiya tells his version of the story to your friends, family, and anyone else who will listen. He swears that after you turned away, he gripped his chest and muttered, “Oh, I just met my wife.”

And the rest was history.

Despite your eventual marriage to Umemiya—someone that others refuse to antagonize out of respect for his reputation or out of fear–you still continued to ruin the day of anyone who decided to mess with other shopkeepers.

It was so arousing to Umemiya that you were an enforcer of the town, but you were still his sweet angel at home. You’d often find yourself making out in bed, sometimes with no intention to make love. If sex happened, of course, neither of you would complain, but sometimes you just need to make out with your partner. As Umemiya's fingers languidly roam across the flesh of your hip, he’d often narrate just how he felt about you:

“My little enforcer. They still whisper about you in the streets, you know? Sometimes, I eavesdrop when a kid from Bofurin visits the nursery, and I can’t help but be so proud because they’re talking about my wife.”

You groan softly into him, partly because of the way his tongue parts your lips as he mumbles into your mouth and partly because you know what they say about you.

“Don’t be so bashful, my little ass-kicker,” he whispers, a smile forming on his lips and against yours. “But if only they knew how good of a girl you are for me.”

You pull away to nuzzle your face into his neck. Your cheeks are growing hot as Umemiya pulls your thigh around his waist, kneading the tense muscle in your calf.

“If only they knew that I get to see you like this, so sweet, perfect, and-”

“Pitiful,” you interject.

“If you’re pitiful, then I’m worse.”

He places a soft kiss against your cheek and slides his hand between you both. His touch is familiar and yet still setting your body ablaze as he parts your folds and rubs gentle circles on your clit.

“God, Ume..” your heart quickens as his fingers make expert work of the sensitive bundle of nerves between your thighs. You find his hold on you after all these years incredible, and you even say so in that moment.

“I can say the same about you, my sweet girl. I feel like I’ve known you in every life I’ve lived and every life I ever will live. You feel so constant to me.”

His lips are back on yours, searching tongues, and hungry groans are shared between you as he continues to rub your clit with his thumb and slips his middle finger inside your sex.

You grip his shoulder as you buck your hips against his palm.

“That’s it, baby. Just like that.”

You run your fingers through his hair, pulling some of the longer strands and earning a soft growl from Umemiya’s throat.

“I love you so much, Ume.”

If you weren’t so enraptured by his fingers and the pleasure he was bestowing upon you, you would have noticed how his eyes sparkled when you uttered those words. Whenever you say you love him, he looks at you as though it’s his first time hearing it–with eyes full of absolute adoration and devotion.

“I love you, too. I knew I loved you the moment I laid eyes on you.”

Your breathing is shallow now; he knows how close you are, so he pulls you closer, the hand that was previously keeping your leg around him now snaking around your waist.

He knows what to do—and what to say—to get you exactly where you want to be.

“Let go, baby.” 

“Come on, pretty girl.” 

“It’s ok. You can hold onto me if you need to.”

“I promise I have you.”

“Let me have all of you.”

“Cum, yeah, just like that. Theeeeere you go, sweetheart.”

After your orgasm, he pulls his fingers away—a brief pang of disappointment radiates through his chest at no longer being inside of you—and raises them to his lips to lick them clean.

Hayato Suo

You lay on your back, feeling as though death would be a welcome end to your current state. You’ve been exhausted for some time, and you will continue to be exhausted as Suo, as naked as you are, hovers over you and places kisses against your back.

“Do you need a break?” His voice has returned to the cool tone you’ve come to know, signaling that there might be a lull in your lovemaking session.

“I think I have one more in me.”

You can feel him smile against the sweat-slicked skin of your back. 

“That’s my princess.”

He trails kisses down your spine, making sure to lick the hickeys that have formed into angry welts.

“What do you think our friends would say if they knew you liked to be called something so adorable?”

“Sakura would laugh at me,” your deadpan delivery earns a chuckle from Suo.

“Sakura is terrified of you, dove.”

“As he should be. Do I scare you, Suo?”

“No, you don’t scare me. But I am scared of the absence of you. I never want to exist in a world where you don’t.”

“You’re being dramatic. You know I can handle my own.”

His hands part your ass, and his tongue slides down to your mound, already covered and stuffed with the previous sessions' saliva and cum.

“I know what they whisper about you. But it’s hard for me to believe them as I only know of you in this way.” He’s circling your tender entrance with his tongue, allowing yours and his thick cream to coat his lips.

You quiver, your body already aware of what’s about to happen to you.

“I’m so fortunate to have the Makochi bruiser under me, coming undone on my tongue.”

“Suo, please…”

He slips a hand under you and massages your clit while finally sliding his tongue into you.

“I’m so lucky that you give so much to me. It’s only fair that I reward you, don’t you think?”

You moan in approval, gently bouncing your hips back and riding his tongue.

“Please let me cum on your tongue, Suo.”

“Anything for you, dove. Absolutely anything for you.”

[leilaofpaper]

Cinderella’s Castle Song Rankings

Rankings might change with the proshot - and I’m aware some people might have just had off days vocal wise! Generally I loved the songs in CC, just some more than others!

1. Ash to Ash

Honestly 1 and 2 are interchangeable, but the ethereal quality and the combination of Bryce and Kim’s voices just tipped this one to first.

2. Step on Your Grave

A couple of interesting lyric quirks made this one slightly below Ash to Ash (namely the whole lawyer line), but Bryce kills this song and it’s such a great character song for Ella. Let black women be rightfully angry!

3. Cursed Crazy

I love this song lyrically, for story progression, and also just the music is great. Jeff’s vocals weren’t the best (I assume he was having a bad day), but he’s not as big of a part in this as he was in Castle On A Hill. I don’t actually think the narrator was that necessary in this song to be honest.

4. Ever After

Bryce Charles solo, with great ensemble backing. This song honestly sounds like an end of Act I song and so the placement makes you wonder what on earth is gonna happen next.

5. Neon

James kills this song. It’s a moment of “maybe this prince could be charming?” before he ruins it immediately after lol.

6. Ash to Ash reprise

Again, Bryce Charles. What else is there to say. This is mostly this low since it’s so short.

7. Last Forever

Bryce, Mariah, and Lauren have great harmonies in this. I think I would have enjoyed it more if I was not so certain of what would happen right after this scene.

8. Trappings of Starlight

I like this song, but it hasn’t stuck with me as much as the others. Bonus points for Tadius dad-dancing, and for Ella getting a moment to mourn her friends.

9. Facade

I did not enjoy Facade as much as I thought I would - something about the audio was off. Not sure if it was intentional dissonance or what. I also felt all three were deep into character voices so not as vocally impressive as they normally are, specifically noticed this with Mariah. Hoping I’ll like it better in the pro shot.

10. Watch/Watch reprise

This is mostly so low since I struggle to watch this scene with Ella crying out in pain the whole time. Looping in the reprise as it happens so soon after and isn’t much different.

11. Castle On A Hill/Castle On A Hill Reprise

Linking these two together also since they’re essentially the same song. I really want Jeff to stop writing himself so much falsetto. This song could have been amazing if it was fully ensemble or if Jeff was singing in his low tone. I also got the impression he had strained his voice and I’m well aware he sounded better on the demo. I was just really disappointed as I was so looking forward to this song and it was hard to sit through. It also feels disjointed from the rest of the show as it has no plot relevance.

[thecoleopterawithana]

Eras: The Beatles | Episode 6 - Now and Then

In the final episode of Eras: The Beatles, we hear the story behind The Beatles' final single Now and Then, including new interviews with Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr. Narrated by Martin Freeman, the episode also features insight on the new track from Sean Ono Lennon, Olivia Harrison and Peter Jackson.

.

[This episode features more complete audio from the soundbites included in the 'Now and Then' short film/documentary. Under the cut are transcriptions of some of my favorite sections. Including Paul's interpretation of the meaning of 'Now and Then' (bonus points if you guess his answer!)]

PAUL: And then 'Now and Then' just kind of languished in a cupboard and we didn't do anything with it. I kept saying, "You know, maybe we should do something with this, seems a bit—" "Hm, I don't know..." There wasn't a great desire to do anything with it. So it hung around for a while. Years! And every so often, I'd kind of go to the cupboard and think, "There's a new song in there! We should do it! We gotta do it!" But it'd go back in the cupboard.

[...]

PAUL: Peter [Jackson] had sent me a text while he was doing the 'Get Back' thing. He said, "Here's a piece of dialogue of John's that I'd like to use, but George is rehearsing in the background," and you could hear George's guitar and you couldn't really make out quite what John was saying because it was distracting. He said, "But we've got this new technology: Machine Assisted Learning. M.A.L., so we're calling it MAL." Which was like— that was really cool! Because our old road manager and dear friend was Mal [Evans].

[...]

PETER JACKSON: I'd had this idea for two or three years about him [Paul] singing a duet with John. And the fact that we'd developed this software now allows us to separate the voices and the music meant that I could take a song that John and Paul were singing on, just separate John's vocal only, and Paul could have that for playing on stage. And then his band and himself could do the vocals and the playing for the rest of the song. So he could do a duet with John. He didn't even blink, he just said, "That's a fantastic idea, I love it! Let's do it!" And so we quickly turned that around and got that underway. So Paul was now touring with a John Lennon duet on 'I Got a Feeling'.

[...]

PETER JACKSON: I got a phone call from Paul saying, "Is it possible to use that technology for another project I've been thinking about? [...] Would it be possible to take John's vocal and clean it up and get rid of everything else? Because that would allow us to finish this Beatles song." And absolutely, it didn't take me more than about a second to get back to him and say, "Of course we can do it!"

[...]

PETER JACKSON: We assumed that the copy of 'Now and Then' that they were working to in the studio in 1995, where the vocals were coming from, was probably not a first-generation copy. [...] So we though, well this is probably a third generation [tape copy]. [...] And so we contacted Sean Lennon and he was very helpful. And sure enough, we got a digital copy of the original. Which is the same demo, same performance, but two generations better.

[...]

RINGO: I'm sitting there thinking, "I don't remember George doing that solo?" It was just like practicing, maybe. Cus it sounds like George! Then Paul said, "No, it's me." [laughs] But Paul did a great job. I mean, he's very good, you know, Paul. He's a very good musician.

[...]

RINGO: Giles [Martin] had to fly out to LA one day to listen to a four-hour string session that Paul wanted, and then fly back to England! [laughs] There's no string sections in England!

[...]

PAUL: Eventually, when we got to mix number 7 it was, "Wow, this is it! Now it's a Beatle record!" And we played it to various people, some of whom cried. Some of whom said, "Jesus Christ! It's a Beatles record!" But the reaction was very favorable.

[...]

RINGO: The difference from the two tracks of John, the old track of John— you know, we have to thank Sean as well, because he found the original tape. So that's the one you can really hear John, not the copy-copy-copies. And... it's like John's there, you know. It's far out. It's so clear now you know it's him. Cus on the original one we were working to I couldn't tell if it was Paul or John singing half the time. But now you know it's John! [chuckles]

[...]

PAUL: I think it just means 'now and then'. "Now and then, I have a cup of tea". I'm not sure it means an awful lot more than that. But, looking at it from today's perspective, now and then. Then you can start to get all sorts of meanings in. The modern-day, the historical past of the Beatles. It lines up with all of that. But we were always very happy to let people make their own minds up. "Here it is, it's a song. Now, the minute we deliver it to you, it's up to you. You can do anything you want with it." And people do!

[...]

RINGO: And that was what it was like for the three of us when we started this role in the 90s. We had to pretend— it always makes me laugh when I think of it— we had to pretend that he'd gone for a cup of tea or his lunch. But that he was still around. Because it was very strange when we started there's only three of us, after all those years, and all that life, that there were four of us. And I still miss him, man!

[...]

SEAN LENNON: It feels very synchronous that the lyric speaks about time and that it's taken so much time. That it sort of fuses the past and the present. It's like a time capsule. And it all feels very meant to be — or fated, or something — in the nicest sense.

[...]

PAUL: When I remember the Beatles, I remember the joy, the talent, the humor, the love. And I think, if people remembered us for that — for those things — I'd be very happy.

[depressed-teacup-inc]

Ok what was that play

Ok hi everyone, episode 24 out (yes I’m aware episode 23 isn’t out so we lack a whole bunch of fucking context) but let’s try to analyze this anyways.

So. Let’s try to take this a little bit at a time.

Episode starts, and Adrien is in London (probably happened in episode 23) and clearly had a bad falling out with marinette, courtesy of abuse mcbusive dad. Great.

Listen Adrien this episode was a mixed bag for me, because on one side I’m so happy that he finally got to stand up to his dad and tell him shit as it is (especially considering what happens in the season 5 finale which I will not spoil for those who didn’t see the leaks, but let’s just say he doesn’t get the chance to ever stand up to that man again) but the fact that all of that eventually boils down to “I’m done with you because you won’t let me be with marinette” is kinda upsetting?

And that’s really my biggest disappointment with Adrien’s character this season! Adrien was always a compelling and sweet protagonist that beyond romance, held friendship and support above everything, and craved freedom to live his own life, but all of this is kinda gone? He’s just a reward for marinette to win and save now, and everything he does (rebelling for his freedom) is only because of marinette.

If Gabriel decided to suddenly approve of Marinette or Marinette grew up to become just as bad as Gabriel (which frankly, considering the dynamic ladybug has with Chat Noir, where she constantly screamed at him until he became her yes man is unfortunately likely), Adrien would let it be, because he and marinette can be together! He would let himself be abused because he never actually grew as a person! If anything, he was downgraded by the show to purely Marinette’s love interest and it’s just such a disappointment because I genuinely enjoyed Adrien’s character (for all his flaws and bad writing in the show).

Anyways Adrien tangent aside, marinette goes looking for him during the end of year party (which just sidenote, a trampoline on the Eiffel Tower sounds super dangerous, and Marinette’s dress? Ugly as hell, for the dress that’s supposed to represent how much she’s grown and her talent in capturing people’s hearts with her designs, it is really bad, and I would have just put her in that concept art gown they had for her with the butterflies and warm pink gradient) and ends up in the art room of her school, where Felix and Kagami reveal to her the entire truth about the Agreste family!

…ok so several notes on this entire situation:

1. I’m sorry but for the life of me I couldn’t take this fucking play seriously. The masks and the poor props (the pillow for the baby bump) and Felix and Kagami’s super stiff abstract acting made me lose my shit and laugh, they could have literally just used the camera amok to make something with a bit more of a budget and an interesting art style, and had Felix and Kagami be the narrators instead of this shit

2. The sheer absurdity of this show to reveal all the biggest plot points and the entire catalyst for this story (if Emilie never made the sentibabies she would have lived and peacock miraculous wouldn’t have been broken, hence Gabriel wouldn’t be Hawkmoth) through a fucking play is beyond me and shows how little care the writers put into the plot of this show that doesn’t revolve marinette and true love, we should have figured this out not from two side characters but rather through Gabriel himself (bonus points IF ADRIEN GETS TO KNOW THE FUCKING TRUTH RATHER THEN HAVE MARINETTE KNOW IT AND CONTROL ADRIEN)

3. Felix and Kagami’s motives

Ok so this is a bit of a longer point, so let’s break this down. So I don’t understand Felix and Kagami’s motive change at all? I thought Felix all this time was working towards getting the peacock miraculous and stealing all the rings from the abusive parents because it was a moral thing for him? Like he is a sentimonster and he knows Adrien is a sentimonster, and therefore he keeps fighting to protect and save his cousin?

BUT APPARENTLY THATS NOT THE SITUATION ANYMORE??? So apparently Kagami is a sentimonster too (tho she never before season 5 gave that impression at all? If anything she seems very headstrong and independent, and her mom was never villain levels abusive, BUT I GUESS SHE IS NOW?!) and Adrien is not (this I believe is purely Felix being misinformed and not having the full picture, because there’s no way in hell this show would literally use the same visuals they used on Adrien to describe Felix being controlled by the ring without wanting people to draw a connection, but I thought Felix knew? I mean he was saying how he did all of this in hopes of freeing his dear cousin, so I assumed Felix knew all this time)

And because of that? Felix’s motive? True loveeeee.

…ok listen I don’t hate Felix and Kagami together but holy shit I hate that motive

Cuz it’s not like Felix can have a compelling motive for doing less then ok things because of devotion to family and protecting someone who’s the same as him (tho I will concede Kagami and Felix are apparently in love for being sentikids together and they are a cute dynamic so good for them) NO YOU GUYS WE NEED A HETEROSEXUAL ROMANCE, AND SCREW FELIX TAKING DIRECT ACTION TO SAVE ADRIEN AND TELLING HIM THE TRUTH, LETS JUST TELL MARINETTE EVERYTHING AND SHE’LL SAVE ADRIEN WITHOUT TELLING HIM ANY OF THE TRUTH BECAUSE SHES MARINETTE!

…but yeah I thought that entire debacle was a lot.

Also the way they removed akuma alerts this episode so Marinette can just not go to battle and be justified for chasing Adrien crazily, because otherwise she would have looked like a hypocrite? They literally had to remove something they had from day one of this show (an emergency alert for akumas) just to justify the fact marinette didn’t go to battle and chased Adrien so she wouldn’t seem like an awful person (and the way she’s literally not even feeling bad about missing a whole battle, and Chat Noir was berated for missing battles for not being able to escape his civilian life, BUT YEAH YOU GUYS ITS FINE LETS NOT THINK ABOUT THE DOUBLE STANDARD TOO MUCH)

Also Natalie’s hair going white to show she’s dying was kinda weird (was it supposed to show how she’s so sick she’s not even dyeing her hair red anymore?) and Gabriel’s akuma design was ugly as fuck.

But yeah I’m dreading the finale as I already know what is happening there and im fucking scareddd

(P.S. can everyone calm down saying Kagami and Felix are fucked up for how they got Marinette’s attention? They literally did the one thing they knew she’d care about aka she’s obsessed with Adrien she’d follow if Adrien is involved, this isn’t bringing up her trauma settle down girlies)

[illleavemymessageinmysong]

“Demons Dance’? Lord knows what that’s about!…”

I get a feeling that Paul keeps tracks with some of his most personal lyrics away from centre stage: released as bonus tracks on separate editions of albums, as additional tracks on various formats. This goes back to ‘Same Love’, a track written in 1987 but only released as a b-side of the 1997 single ‘Beautiful Night’. A track so glorious that, by any rational standards, it should have been front and centre of an album release.

The usual proviso applies that the lyrics might just be words to go with a tune but, really? The song deals with thoughts of rekindling a past love, with all the complications and uncertainties that would go with that. “Though it may not be as good as new, well, still, it must be better than the pain that I went through”. Listen to how he sings the word “pain”. If he’s not being real there, he’s a much better actor than he’s given credit for.

But what about a few of his by the way tracks from more recent times? Let’s look at ‘Demons Dance’ and ‘Struggle’.

‘Demons Dance’ was recorded during the sessions for ‘New’ but was only released in October 2014 as part of the Collector’s Edition of New. The Paul McCartney Project blog tells us that during his Twitter Q&A on October 30 2014, Paul was asked what was the meaning of ‘Demons Dance’ and what inspired it. He swiftly batted that away with “Demons Dance’? Lord knows what that’s about!” Well, quite. None of the regular tactic of saying that the lyrics have no particular meaning.

The song’s narrator has a desire for a connection with someone, and the feelings that go with this are so strong he likens them to his personal demons. This goes deep. Only by connecting with this person, can he get peace of mind.

“I can't wait much longer 'til you tell me baby, there’s some chance we'll get together maybe, sooner or later I'll be in with half a chance”

This has been a long term feeling and he’s desperate for some message of reciprocation. Only that can ‘exorcise’ his demons. The guy’s got it bad. “Girl I want you to do it, I’ve been waiting so long”. Yep, this goes way back.

Do you write lyrics as intense as this if you don’t really feel them? I’m going with nope.

What about ‘Struggle’, first released on the Japanese version of ‘New’? This one doesn’t hang about getting to the point: “ Want to get you in my heart again, want to love you once more”, it begins. It sounds like the same narrator we heard in ‘Demons Dance’. Again, and even more explicitly, this is addressed to someone the narrator used to be with.

“If you wanna love, if you wanna fight, it doesn’t really matter, I want you tonight”. So maybe this past relationship had its’ ups and downs, was a bit volatile. “I can think of something when I get you home tonight”, he adds. See previous post for the possible importance of “home tonight”, a phrase that turns up in five Macca songs.

“It’s the same old story, it’s happening again”, he declares. This longing is something that has been a feature through the years for the narrator. It has peak periods of intensity.

“Anytime you want me, I’m not hard to find”. This person is out of his current orbit but could contact him easily enough.

“We can work it out together, we'll get through this somehow”. Yeah, we can work it out…..

It ends with “It's the same old story, it's happening again. Life’s eternal struggle”. It may ebb and flow but this feeling isn’t going away.

Jumping ahead to tracks from the Egypt Station sessions, we’ve previously had a look at ‘Get Enough’. One of his most emotionally raw lyrics. Snuck out on streaming platforms as the clock struck 12 at New Year 2019.

Then there’s ‘Sixty Second Street’, released on subsequent editions of ‘Egypt Station’. Set to a pretty tune, this is a lighter take than the other tracks we’ve looked at but, again, describes a desire to connect with someone. Our narrator wants to meet up with this person, just a minute of their time is all he needs. Mind you, he then suggests they “grab a bite”, so maybe a bit longer. A lighter take, yes, but meeting up with this person would make his life complete, so it’s a big deal.

A recurring theme going on here, I reckon.

[charliespringverse]

iwbft – ghosted: a Bonus brief summary of my annotations

all highlighted quotes: 91

· ouch/ow/owie: 5

· real/felt/relatable/so true: 4

· ☹/☹☹/☹☹☹: 4

She said Shrek and Fiona, and then told me she never wanted to be famous. — the double life thing babeyy

“Jimmy,” he heaves out, and I feel a stab of panic in my chest. — just hearing ur friend's name shouldn't be enough to trigger panic unless u already know something is Very Wrong . at which point i feel they should've pushed for further help instead of finishing out the tour

“We can’t leave Jimmy out.” Lister stands shirtless in the middle of the room and spins around on the spot. — fuck yeah trio tingz :')

It almost makes me laugh how polite and casual Rowan manages to sound, despite the fact that our best friend is missing. — IT'S A DEFENCE MECHANISM!!!!!

I only wonder how much of it is my fault. — none of it bb dw :( he is Not With It enough to be thinking abt anyone but himself rn

“But I can’t drive.” Rowan stares at me. “I thought you had lessons.” “I only had three lessons.” And then I got bored, or tired, or busy, or all three. — ... adhd lister btw

Why would he do this to us? To me? — i think jimmy's dependence on rowan is more reciprocated than he realises

If we weren’t in a famous band together, I’m not sure whether we’d still be friends now. — this rly hurts my feelings and it hurts more bc he isn't necessarily Wrong i don't think

“You do know I can play eight instruments, right?” “But not the drums, huh.” Rowan folds his arms. “You will never let me live that down.” — LISTERROWAN BESTIEISM BANTER BABEY

“But you think I’m an idiot who has nothing intelligent to say.” “I don’t think that.” “Yeah, you do. You’d much rather I was the one who was missing right now.” Rowan doesn’t respond. We both know I’m right. — WELL MAYBE BUT U DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME THAT. I DON'T WANNA THINK ABOUT IT.

“I wish you wouldn’t—” he begins but is cut off when his phone buzzes. — i hate that the phone gave him a get out from being open n sincere w lister :^(

“That’s a Southeastern Railway train,” says Lister instantly. “You can tell by the seat patterns.” — [freddie mercury voice] auuuuutism auuuuutism i want to ride my autism (note: this is summat @to-grill-a-mockingbird says and now i can never get it out of my head)

“He needs a night off.” "A night off from … what? His entire life?” Piero chuckles. “Yes.” — i mean ouch but also Yeah

“That was good news. He hasn’t been kidnapped. He just needed a nap.” “Can you not make a joke about this situation for like one fucking minute, Allister?” — could be the tism on my end but i didn't take this as a joke . jimmy needs a break, piero told them that, lister has seen enough to agree . (also: lister has Also contemplated running away so it makes sense he's less eager to bring jimmy back to ldn bc he doesn't see it as fixing the problem the same way rowan does)

Why do I always have to be the serious one? The worrier? Why can’t someone else do the worrying sometimes? — other ppl Do worry . but not so much that it becomes its own problem worthy of therapy

We save the deep chats for Jimmy. Jimmy doesn’t open up very often, but you know Jimmy will listen if you have something serious to say. — vs jimmy's wednesday narration 'we don't ever talk about deep stuff, me and lister bird' :((((

This whole bedroom is something out of twelve-year-old Lister’s wildest fantasies—it’s spacious and modern, with one floor-to-ceiling window, dark walls, LED lights behind the headboard, and a fifty-inch TV. — what u lack as a child you seek as an adult etc etc (space, material possessions, money)

Rowan’s room is always tidy. He puts away his clothes at the end of the day and makes his bed in the mornings. — always craving order & control :(

Rowan loves to criticize me about buying unnecessary things, but all I need to do is remind him of the velvet chaise longue in his bedroom that I’m pretty sure nobody has ever sat on. — comedy gold amidst the agony

He blinks at me. “You remembered my weird order?” — remembering ppl's orders is a love language

“Can I … ?” I shuffle on my feet. “Can we eat it in here?” — i hate that he's so uncertain n lacking in confidence while asking one of his best friends

I’ve always been deeply annoyed by what a high metabolism he has. I work out three times a week with a personal trainer just to stay toned. — rowan's fixation on body image makes me ✨nervous✨

“You were reading?” I ask, eyebrow raised. Lister narrows his eyes at me. “Wow, hilarious." — i stand by my 'lister loves to read but nobody ever assumes that or believes him bc their perception is skewed by him not gelling with academia' hc

“But don’t you see how that’s, like, still very fucked-up behavior, Rowan?” — GET HER JADE

And it’s scary that he thinks he’s completely fine. That this level of stress is normal. That he’s a functioning, well-adjusted human who is able to cope with being one of the most famous musicians in the world with absolutely no help or support whatsoever. — yeah :((

“You kissed him,” Rowan says. “So he decided to climb out of a window and run away.” “I mean, yeah, in summary.” — but no, realistically

Rowan wipes a tear from his eye. “Oh my God. So funny.” He’s properly pissing me off now. — give him a break roseph he's already mentally ill u don't have to embarrass him as well (/lh)

It’s a question I’ve asked myself every day for years. A question I’ve answered in daydreams, in nightmares, in conversations with myself in the shower. A question I still don’t know the answer to, and maybe never will. A question that doesn’t need an answer, now that I know for sure that Jimmy doesn’t like me back. — aaaaaagonyyyyy beyond power of speeeeeeech when the thing that u want is the only thing out of ur reach

“But … the circumstances of our relationship are so challenging. We live in very, very different worlds, and our lives are on very different trajectories. And sometimes I think relationships just can’t survive that.” — JUSTICE FOR LAIMONDI :(

Jimmy fell asleep almost immediately, a feat that would become less and less common as we all got older, but Lister and I couldn’t sleep because we were too busy watching funny YouTube videos on my phone, muffling laughs into our hands, trying not to wake anyone up. — BABY ARK MY CHILDREN

[nihiltism]

I know I've infodumped this before but not as its own post so let's go. what I'd do if I was in charge of making a live a live anime. I am ignoring the fact that I desperately want it to be a musical because that's not going to happen so ask me about my Separate thoughts about what I'd do if I was in charge of making a The Day The Night Slept The Album-ening of live a live.

ok so my Basic Idea is I'd let the show have a 13 episode (maybe 14? does that happen?) first season. I assume each of the first 7 chapters would need about 2 episodes, but I can see some that end in one like wild west or Definitely present day. I could also see some taking longer though, like distant future and near future. it'd even itself out I think to average to 2 episodes each.

it'd be an anthology series basically. a bunch of non-connected stories, but tied together by one key point. a narrator. see I have a Framing Device idea here and it's that we know odio from the very beginning, but never see his face or know who he is. this is very inspired by princess tutu here but here the stories are actively being Read by somebody outside of it, and occasionally he takes the reins to bend the retelling a bit, likely in the chapter boss' favor. note that while the anime is actually Playing and showing the characters, if the narrator does decide to kick in the characters will likely not be doing what he says they are, and they Definitely cannot hear him. it's an unreliable narrator story, but to the point where it's pretty easy to tell that he's biased. in practice how this probably would go would be like in princess tutu, occasionally when a character reaches a point that justifies his own philosophy in some way he'll cut in and monologue about The Nature Of Man Bringing Only Tragedy or whatever the fuck. also maybe cutting in to give the chapter villains some sympathy for the devil, maybe at the end to close each story out as he turns the last page? I dunno I don't want to be Too obvious but like. odio does sound pretty damn evil by default so maybe it'd be obvious anyway.

anyway! that's season one. anthology of short stories. on the final episode I'd leave it hanging on him picking up one last book or something, but I'd let that be told in either a short season (again, do these happen?) or a movie ??? anyway that would start out with the middle ages chapter, which I don't think will have any narration? I'm iffy on this? it'd be cool to see his retrospective thoughts on his own story but also, that's a bit heavy-handed, I'm not sure. anyway the thing is that around the end, when oersted breaks into his soliloquy at the archons roost. there I think we'd get a sort of cut-in, as halfway through our narrator starts reading it out himself. shut book camera pan Blonde Man Jumpscare I think that's the best way to go about the "oh shit the villain is the protag of that story" reveal. also it'd be fun. anyway that'd be either the beginning chunk or the first two? episodes?

from here I'm not Exactly sure how to frame it because all of the endings are Very important, but also kind of. happen at the same time? I do not know how to do this. the easy way would just be to have it remain anthology-ish, and have say the boss rush version of the dominion of hate be one story while the rest is another, but I don't think that fits into the framing device well. mm?? I have no idea. I think we're good without the bad ending of the dominion of hate happening as long as the "if you kill this dude you'll end up just as fucked as him" message gets conveyed in some way or another but I don't think we can skip the whole other version of the DoH.

maybe we can play it less as Actually Happening and more a what if scenario?? more odio just. Fucking Talking Alone Again about what Could be if not for Man's Folly^tm. I think that'd get the point across, be a good intro for the rest of the dominion of hate and stay in universe but it would Not have the added bonus of "ok you kicked around a bunch of jrpg protagonists now what. did that make you feel any better" unless we tried to hammer that home in a different way. and oh boy do I not have a single idea what to do with the armageddon ending. maybe instead just have him mention how if he and the other odios were Still denied he'd have the page burnt entirely or something. maybe at the end. shrugs. there's not a ton I can do here.

eh. anyway the actual dominion of hate would likely be more based in the protagonists than anything, likely picking a main character (Probably Akira) and not having a Narrator as much as just being in the mc's head from time to time. though I Do like the idea of odio still being there Attempting to nudge the protags and them being actually able to hear him this time, it'd have to be used infrequently. or not at all. there is a certain merit to them not knowing anything about him until getting to the archons roost but Us knowing a lot. I dunno. anyway I think this adaptation would have a lot more interactions between the protagonists (desperately needed) and I think that'd take up most of the runtime there, we can incorporate the trials if we want to (trial of heart is necessary to be sure but the rest really aren't, so it can be a good dungeon for the whole team to go through and have some more plot-motivated character moments) but I think Getting The Band Together might already take a good amount of time if we don't rush past good chances for character building or interaction. I want it to feel like the mcs Do actually start to be a team that is the thing I have the Most problems with about the game, though in doing so that will mean we're gonna have to do away with the 4 character party thing unless we want to have them split up sometimes. that's details. the point is that it's going to be All the mcs together most of the time and hopefully it doesn't feel crowded.

anyway from there it kind of goes as expected, except with the aforementioned (we don't need to have the bad ending be its own thing but we do need to mention the consequences). maybe somebody of the team Does try to grant oersteds wish before being held back or something. for similarities reasons I say oboro but this can be wiggled. anyway I also think around the actual Ending ending you'd get more than just one monologue from the mcs, you'd probably get more of like. an actual Conversation I guess? the mcs building off of each other's points to oersted? I dunno I'm spitballing here I do think it would Start Off with akira's ending though and then somebody scruffs him and continues off from there. I dunno the important thing is that everybody should get a word in or perhaps a hug in in the case of pogo. I think that's it though? I probably won't return to the plot device to show like another book being closed or whatever that is purely A Plot Device so it'd be weird to have it come back after oersted was Thoroughly Dead. I will say though if the live a live anime has an ED it's gotta have sin of odio in the A that's the law.

[gunjounoflorseca]

“全人類ヒューマノイド/We are to be humanoid beings” Analysis or Whatever by firstname “bunny” lastname

My caveats

1. I have an extremely elementary understanding of Japanese, DeepL and language forums can only take you so far. Going off the English translation of the lyrics in the video and just doing my best with the written interview

2. Even more basic understanding of music theory, I am a simple college dropout vocalist

3. Never read hamlet, not an astronomer

This seems to be a work where every aspect of it is a different story expressing the same or a connected theme. We get different information in each part that pulls it all together.

A. Lyrics

B. MV

C. The music itself

D. To Be

BONUS: thing I just considered

It’s the feeling of losing humanity and the Earth, quite literally ⤵️

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terraforming_of_Mars

But also how this dynamic can fit in one’s personal life

LYRICS

So, first time through, it appears as a breakup song full of resentment and either a literal sci-fi horror romance event, or a little delusion. The protagonist, A, is going through a breakup full of cruelty, rage, and the feeling that they don’t know who they’re with anymore. A feels like their partner, B, isn’t even human anymore. A does consider if it’s themself that’s changed, but regardless, it’s over. A still feels deeply for B and wants the best for them, (though I don’t particularly trust them as a narrator) but it’s over.

The second verse is about how soon some humans, including B, are going to participate in the project of abandoning earth to move to mars. I’m unsure if A is also joining because of the “I hope your comrades on mars make you happy” line. Maybe when A & B get there they’ll just stop hanging out, though.

If we aren’t taking this literally, the event isn’t migration but something that pushed A too far and caused the breakup. I think understanding the original lyrics would help me sort out this part better. 😞

I also think it’s possible that the perspective switches between A & B due to the “to be” factor which I will get to!

I think the thesis statement of the lyrical story & themes are in the title and the English lyrics. Of course the title will stand out, and why use a different language if not to emphasize it? Maybe because it sounds different or fits better but she’s a very intentional and thorough artist.

For the final part with the title “humanoid” is repeated multiple times while the protagonist breaks down into total despair with the final line “in a room without you” it adds an enclosed feeling, as opposed to the video where those characters are out in the open. 「全人類ヒューマノイド」 is an endgame event, a terrible occurrence. Suffocating and life destroying.

For the English portions there are:

“Break up, it’s over / stay away from me”

And “I’ll never say you again 「愛してるよ」” / “I’ll never see you again” which strongly establish the breakup portion of the story. I think there could be a reading that maybe the couple will get back together, there are still feelings there, but with these ideas emphasized, that’s the ending for sure.

But my favorite is “survive in any form.” I think this speaks strongest to the overall message of 「全人類ヒューマノイド」 / “We are to be Humanoid Beings.” No matter what happens, even if you become “humanoid” rather than “human,” you will continue. It’s the theme of survival over humanity, staying in the relationship despite loss of love(/respect/care/whatever), staying alive and free despite having to carry the burden of death.

VIDEO

The characters are White, Black, and White2.

White is in extreme poverty, living on the street in the city and we see Black sitting in a run down building. While scavenging, White is caught by him and tied up. We also see her sitting under a streetlight and Black appears offering her hand. She takes it. Black leads her out of the city, over water and trails, feeding her and assumedly taking her out of poverty. The power shifts at some point, where still tied up, White drags Black through the dirt. When they’re far enough away from the city, Black unties her. She chokes him to death. We see a similar scene under the streetlight but instead of offering his hand, he walks past her. White breaks down sobbing. We see a montage of their time together and her life before they met. She returns to the city, now wearing his clothes. Under the streetlight, White stands before another girl, White2, wearing White’s previous clothes, and offers her hand. White2 takes it.

Notes:

- The rope and bottom of White’s shoes are bright reddish orange. I believe this represents the Mars angle

- In a scene under the streetlight a rat runs by and when she’s being led to a field, there’s a couple shots of frogs (that appear to be, anyway) having sex. Lucky!!! Very fitting!!!

- Throughout the video there are very quick shots and still images of White digging in trash and sitting curled up in the city. Sometimes the colors change and ummm it’s just a very good video

- I think it’s possible to read the end as White and White2 being the same person and the cycle continues inwards but I don’t think that’s the case. We see a shot of White2’s face and I think it wouldn’t be too hard to make it look like Saechi is both people. I’m going with the interpretation that they’re two different people.

I think this video tells a few stories. Taking it all very literally, where a man kidnaps a woman under the guise of helping her, she kills him, and then takes on his role to then do the same that was done to her, to another woman. I would watch this movie. I did watch this movie, it’s a music video. It’s very good. Did I say that it’s good yet?

Next, connecting it to the lyrics, it can be a regular bad love story. Someone emotionally vulnerable is taken advantage of and coerced into an abusive relationship. There’s power imbalance and struggle there and even though they break up, the victim carries that hurt and continues the cycle of abuse into their next relationship.

But I think it’s mostly about Mars. In capitalist cultures we (broadly speaking) don’t take care of the Earth, we don’t take care of each other, we don’t even take care of what we’ve made ourselves. We build and we destroy and we take over and then we leave it to rot when it doesn’t serve us. If you can’t make money, what use are you? People have debates on who “deserves” health and happiness based on how much work they do. This is also how we treat the planet. Is it worth saving or is fattening rich people’s wallets more important? If we move to Mars, we haven’t learned anything. We’ll do the same thing to her. We’ll do the same thing until we’ve died out. This story is a terrible tragedy and a simple statement. If we continue as we are, it’s inevitable that humanity will disappear.

MUSIC

I don’t have much to say here but I think it’s worth mentioning that I think the actual arrangement and music itself is part of this story building. It feels huge and dark, while building a lot of tension. There are a lot of instruments used but they compliment each other rather than blend together (in my opinion!) so it really suits the idea of a planet-altering event. I really don’t know how to talk about this 😰 the feelings the strings bring is a base feeling of tragedy and adding chorus, piano, guitar, in the way that they’re used really creates a kind of terror. The inhale at the end of the song makes me feel like there’s more to the story, too, going along with the cycle ending of the video.

“TO BE”

In the video description it says

原作「To be, or not to be」：大塚紗英

Original work “To be, or not to be”: Sae Otsuka

PART A

[I’ve just found out that there is a film with the same title but I’m pretending that’s not an option because I don’t know anything about it (curtesy)]

And that is the very famous phrase from Shakespeare’s Hamlet. I’ve actually been meaning to get into Shakespeare maybe I’ll start with this one? Info ⤵️

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/To_be,_or_not_to_be

Basically, this is the beginning of the speech where Hamlet considers if he should commit suicide or murder and if life is worth it despite so much pain. Is death a peaceful sleep or not?

Is it worth it to break up a relationship you’re so used to being in? Is it worth it to give up on Earth and try to survive on a planet you weren’t made for?

PART B

The official English title of the song is “We are to be Humanoid Beings,” something that surprised me! 「人類」 is not a word I’d ever consciously come across before so I was curious how it would be translated and thought it would be something like “All humanity are humanoids.” This shouldn’t have surprised me though because recent releases have a similar thing going (“ロマンスのはじまり /the beginning of romance” is officially “romance dawn” and “ロマンスは映画より奇なり / romance is stranger than films”became “romance is stranger than this sweet movie”). This is super telling to what the core idea is, like with the usage of English in the lyrics. She’s incredibly deliberate with her word choices.

“Humanoid” in English, and I think it’s the same in Japanese but forgive me if I’m missing nuance, is something that looks like a human but is not. Robots, aliens, monsters, that kind of thing.

“To be” is connected to Hamlet in the description but in addition to being an English verb it’s also a phrase meaning “future.” “Soon-to-be”, “bride-to-be,” “humanoid being-to-be.”

If we aren’t on Earth, are we still humans?

BONUS: THING I JUST CONSIDERED

There is also something to be said about gender here because Mars’s symbol ♂ is also used represent the male sex scientifically and culturally and Venus ♀, the feminine counterpart, is another planet people have theorized about terraforming/colonizing. I took the romance story as gender neutral/fluid rather than about a straight couple’s power dynamics. I think I could do a whole queer lens reading about why White2 is specifically a woman but I think it’s more to show that the gender doesn’t matter here? Abuse and hurt can take place in any kind of relationship. (Or she is who they had available/it would stand out more to have a guy in a dress.)「僕 」and 「あなた」 are what’s used for “I” and “you” which are neutral in English. 「僕」 is masculine but not uncommon to be used by women in lyrics and 「あなた」 is neutral but there are more masculine alternatives. (I don’t know if any of the other lyrics are particularly gendered, forgive me 😰) So it could be BF -> GF but I think along with the video with the story of GF -> BF it balances it out. Maybe! Just thought about Roman mythology and sailor moon for a moment and thought it was worth mentioning!

IN CONCLUSION: LETS TRY TO NOT DESTROY EARTH OR EACH OTHER, OK? 💕💕💕💕

[natromanxoff]

Brian May live at the Fat Tuesdays in New York, NY, USA (with Les Paul) - March 25, 1991

The gig was played at Fat Tuesdays, a small nightclub that Les Paul played once a week for many years. On this night, they were filming part of a home video called Guitar, narrated by guitarist Jeff "Skunk" Baxter of Steely Dan fame. But the released video included only part of Early Morning Blues.

Fan Stories

“The gig was played at Fat Tuesdays, a small nightclub that Les Paul played once a week for many years. On this night, they were filming part of a home video called Guitar, narrated by guitarist Jeff "Skunk" Baxter of Steely Dan fame. Al Di Meolo also played that night and I believe Les Paul intros him at the end of Brian's set. It was a truly amazing night for me and the other people there. You can hear the excitement in the crowd, made up of an older, jazz crowd, including regulars that came each week to see Les Paul, and the Queen fans that had heard about it on the radio that afternoon and from friends. When we arrived at Fat Tuesdays, not knowing what to expect, there were only three other people there to see Brian. By the time he went on, though, another 50 or so people had shown up. Before the gig, I had the honor of meeting Brian, hanging by himself at the bar. I was even able to buy Brian a beer, as he had just finished the one he was drinking! Then the subject of live recordings came up (my friend blurted out, about me, 'he's got 100 live shows', to which I was a bit weary of having Brian hear. I mentioned to him that I thought he might not be too happy for fans to have unauthorized recordings, but he said no, as long as I enjoyed them, then it was fine. I even made sure to let him know that a decent portion were of excellent quality! We talked about Queen and other stuff. It was an incredible night and he was one of the nicest and most gracious people I've met. At the time, some of the Hollywood remasters had just been released. I know News Of The World was out (Brian even asked what I thought of the Rick Rubin 'remix' of WWRY... I said it was 'interesting'!)... well, I asked Brian if they had already started work on the remaster for Queen II and he said that it wasn't finished yet or they were working on it. So, I mentioned that if possible, they should include 'See What A Fool I've Been' as a bonus track, since The Game remaster had been released without 'A Human Body' (as I can remember!). He said something like 'you know, we hadn't thought of that' (what???)... and at one point, even took out a pen and paper and wrote down these ideas! Well, as we know, the Queen II remaster came out a few months later, with 'See What A Fool I've Been,' sure enough on it! Maybe it was already planned that way, but who knows! Brian also mentioned that the Queen I remaster would include an unreleased tune, which turned out to be 'Mad The Swine', but I couldn't understand what Brian was saying, so I thought he said 'Madness Wine'. After talking a bit with Brian, we realized we still weren't sure if we were even going to get into the gig, so we kindly asked him if there was somehow he might help us get in... he told us to follow him as he went into the club through the back entrance, down past the kitchen! Once inside the tiny club (where we dutifully paid our way), my friend Mike had a classic line, meant in jest (though I'm not exactly sure how Brian took it!)... he said to Brian: 'Not quite Wembley, huh Brian?'. I hope Brian took it as a joke! There was a guy after the gig that presented Brian with a homemade guitar... it didn't look like the Red Special, but supposedly sounded like it and on a subsequent in-radio 'live' performance from Brian's 'radio tour' for Innuendo, Brian wound up playing it! I can't remember which radio performance this was from, but I know he mentions it on the program. It truly was an amazing, magical night!” - Justin Leiter

(x)

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Thought I'd do some quick book reviews for three sapphic reads I've recently finished.

First one is Mortal Follies by Alexis Hall.

Three stars. I really, really wanted to like this book because the cover is so gorgeous and I wanted so badly to have it on my shelf. Basically how my reading experience goes is that I listen on Audible or read the Kindle and then if I like the book I buy the physical copy, kinda like a murderer displaying trophies of their victims, I dunno why that's the similie I chose to go with. To start with the positives; this book is told in a really cool style with the narrator being an amoral sprite who watches and subtly intervenes over mortal affairs just to collect stories to bring back to their master. Honestly watching them start to slowly and reluctantly feel sympathy for the main leads and their funny commentary was the most entertaining aspect. I also liked the quirky best friend, I find it a shame she didn't get to interact with the narrator, that's a dynamic I would have loved! Sadly they overshadow the main leads who are pretty dull in comparison and the plot feels like two stories mashed together and very rushed because of it, rather than having both the reveal of the villain and the high stakes happen at once at the end to make a better climax and see more of the couple spending time together to build up their connection. This is supposed to have Bridgerton vibes but really lacks the Ton intrigue and politics that make Bridgerton interesting. Bit of a let down but I would be up for reading more stories in this world with the same narrator.

Next up is the Witch and the Vampire by Francesca Flores.

Two stars. Like a lot of people I was really hyped for this book; a sapphic retelling of Rapunzel with witches and vampires, sounds like fun if nothing else. Also, like Mortal Follies, gorgeous cover! But sadly, like Mortal Follies, another let down. And this one doesn't have a fun narrator to save it. This was such a struggle to get through, I felt like a secondaries school English teacher being handed a students first draft, like I could tell the author had a story she really cared about but how it's written is just so basic, with way too much exposition and poorly delivered world building. Similar to another book I read recently, The Shattered Lands, this just feels like it doesn't belong in the YA category, even though it deals with really mature themes and has some graphic, violent moments, the writing style just doesn't suit it.

Her Royal Highness by Rachel Hawking.

Three and a half stars (four if I'm being generous). This book really surprised me, I finished watching Red, White & Royal Blue wanting to find the sapphic equivalent and this kept popping up on booktok. This is just a really sweet teen love story, even if it's by no means perfect. I listened to this on Audible which on the plus side, the narrator had the cutest Texan accent - I have a weakness for Southern Belle accents, can't help it - but it also sadly meant the Scottish accents were awful bordering on hilarious. The history nerd in me does wish we'd got a little more info on the hows and whys of Scotland still having a monarchy, it's just something that's set up without any explanation, but I get that's not the focus. I do feel that the writer had even less understanding of monarchy than who wrote RW&RB, I didn't read that book but going by the movie, the Prince acted mostly on point like a British royal and you felt how important that role was to him wheras Flora could have been just any high profile celebrity or nobility. But again, not the focus, it's high school romance where the alpha queen is revealed to be more than a spoiled brat and the simple country girl falls for her, and that being what it is, it's just very sweet, there's not much more I can say other than it gave me the same corny but cute fluff I got out of watching RW&RB.

Bonus quick review.

Four and a half stars! I did not think Faerie smut was for me, I skimmed through pretty much all the "spicy" parts in the ACOTAR series (which was also 60% of ACOSF). But I dug this, even though it's filthy as hell, I knew what I was going into, and it just surpassed my expectations. And it's gay, maybe that's why, maybe het spice just rarely does it, but this ticked so many boxes I didn't even know I had. Only took off half a star because it's so short and dammit I know it didn't need to be longer because it's just meant to be simple fantasy porn but, ugh, I got way more invested in this three day love story than I did the whole of Mortal Follies!

[accursed-worm]

hi hope youre doing well! i have a question abt red flags tho im not sure if you've answered this b4, why does wil flirt w/ q so much when q first brings him to the casino? im asking bcuz im wondering like, is wil already petrified in pants shitting fear of him at that point?? or is it only later on when q finds him nearly bleeding out again does wil start having the idea that q wants to take revenge on him? but if its the first one, why does he?? do that??? is it like a survival tactic? NO CUZ REALLY i noticed it seemed like wil is subtly suggesting he wants to keep q close for whatever reason when he says he wants to stay in quackitys room/quackity to stay in his room? is he simply committing to the bit??? /LHJ BTW I HOPE I DONT SOUND RUDE I JUST THINK ITS REALLY FUNNY

oh that’s a brilliant question! so firstly, wilbur acts the way he does for a variety of reasons. a big part of it is that it’s kind of just instinct for wilbur at this point, wilbur using the banter and flirting as a defence mechanism. it’s the script he thinks he has to follow, and he’s just so overwhelmed by the entire situation, so vulnerable in that moment. he’s still reeling from the fact that a) quackity has saved him and b) quackity is taking him to las nevadas. like he almost hasn't comprehended the latter yet and the former is still a huge pill to swallow. so teasing and flirting and getting quackity on edge and off-guard with the flirtation is a way for wilbur to draw less attention to what shaky ground he's on right then both from quackity, but also so he can try to ignore it himself. it doesn't exactly work. and he tries to get quackity to stay because ultimately, well. he is aware of how Not Okay he is, and he’s fucking terrified of being left alone.

as for the pants-shitting fear wilbur has of quackity in the later chapters, that actually is something that develops after quackity leads him up to his room! pretty much, when quackity leaves and locks the door, wilbur stumbles over to the door to try and open it, with the vague intent of calling quackity back, but then the door is locked, without quackity having said a word, and wilbur realises with a dawning sense of dread that he has just let himself be led into the heart of las nevadas, and quackity has now locked him away. quackity lied, he lied and wilbur doesn’t actually know what he has left the room to gather. except he does know what quackity did to dream, and it just. well, he spirals, and by the time quackity returns he has retreated as far back as possible, hiding in the only place he can think to.

there really isn’t much to hint at that though, because quackity himself doesn’t understand what happened and the limited 3rd person pov means that it can’t be clearly expressed in the narration. the main thing is that quackity notices blood streaked across the inside of the door leading to the corridor, indicating that wilbur did try to open that door. and also i think it’s vaguely mentioned in wilbur’s first povs—if you know what to look for, you should be able to find little mentions. venetapsi have actually discussed the possibility of writing chapters 1 and 2 from wilbur’s pov, as like a little bonus side thing, which i think would be so fun and also terribly, terribly heartbreaking.

[nerdyenby]

Yellow time :D I’m watching Aimsey

Pregame

I know it’s a fakeout but the c!Aimsey cosplay is cute!!!

Not a fakeout I’m a fool

Their lil bag and the high waisted pants!!!! Hand over the gender!!!!

“My girlfriend’s dead… I don’t have a home… but I’m a silly little guy!!” So true!!!! The silliest <333

NOOOOOOOO C!GUQQIE 😭😭😭

Aimsey calling himself the only welsh person to ever exist, I’d believe it

I know Ran probably told her in advance, but it would be so much funnier if they knew absolutely nothing about the Garfieldfan bit and just freaking went with it as soon as he saw their stream

Aimsey talking about getting out all their swears, don’t think that’s how it works king

“I should get bonus points because I’m a lesbian, moving on” So true

“Is Jimmy ready to game?” Well he is Mr Gaming

I’m so excited to Jimmy and Aimsey interactions, you have no idea :)))

“I’m going to try my absolute best, if I do slip up I will push myself down the stairs” Jimmy sounded so concerned help 😭

Nevermind he is now offering to shove xem down the stairs

Jimmy laughing about the mental image of throwing Aimsey down the stairs several minutes later 😂

They’re so silly :D

THE FANART 😂😂😂

The way they both were so confused my TrueSymmetry

Aimsey and Jimmy asked to team with each other this event??? :(( that’s so sweet I love them

“What are you doing here?” “What are you doing here?” When they run into each other at the place they all said they were going 😂

Jimmy saying Phil has something different in mind every time someone suggests something and him laughing and saying “a little bit of chaos”

I love this team’s energy so much you don’t understand

Aimsey and Jimmy screaming no to bingo and Phil just laughing

Bingo But Fast

Phil woke up and chose violence chaos

Phil and Aimsey’s synchronized gasp when they notice the elytra

Jimmy what are you talking about, you’ve played bingo

They’re just crying about the old textures, valid

Aimsey and Blushi :))

They tried to crit out Bad, I’m crying

“Can anyone get some clay?” “I’m currently in the… uh, thingymajiggy” “Perfect!” Blushi 😂

“I love flying, this is so fun! Oh and I fell, nevermind, no longer fun” and Phil just shrieking

Blushi trying to actually game while Phil is just losing his mind and Aimsey is enabling him

“Sam broke my crafting table!!” Blushi sounded so sibling right there 😭

Already planning to throw for loser dodgebolt after game 1 my beloved

Blushi giving Aims a chicken and it just testing itself out the tube 😂

Aimsey screaming at Jimmy when he missed his miss

Battle Box

Blushi being Aimsey’s hypeman my beloved

This team is so scuffed help 😂

High key thought Phil was referencing MCM there 👀

Phil went “ooo weapon >:D”

What even happened lmao

Jimmy’s little “We’re doing this on purpose, right?” 😭😭😭

THEYRE SO SILLY

“We won the battle, now it’s time to win the war” SO TRUE BLUSHI!!

“I’m overstimulated” “Someone just said we’re the Distracted Dogs, that’s our new game name” just back to back lol

“I’m having too much fun, I can’t” Phil is dying

Hole in the Wall

Aimsey talking about himself like she’s some kind of robot and/or sim is so

Jimmy and Aimsey taking “If we go down, we go down together” to a whole new level”

See kids? If you eat your veggies you too can become a minecraft streamer!!

“We’re pulling it back!!” “We can’t pull it back too much guys, we gotta get last” so true Blushi, so true

“For the sake of Jimmy’s mental health”

Survival Games

Aimsey legit sounds so sad

Aimsey narrating documentary-style 😂

Phil embracing his inner bird is the best thing to happen to this community lol

“I’m gonna get a drink and it’s gonna be ALCOHOL!!!” Phil 😭

HANNAH AND SYLVEE MY BELOVED!!! THEYRE POPPING OFF!!!

TGTTOSAWAF

Aimsey hyping up Blushi :))

Aimsey and Phil continuing the halftime show, as they should

“NO!!! I hate people” valid

Them all just screaming 😂

Noooo Aimsey would’ve been first :((

Philza my most inconsist canon player my beloved <333 (Jimmy’s the most overall lol)

Sands of Time

I love how much xey love SoT <333

Aimsey saying hi to H and Phil underestimating how much this man loves sands

Phil noticing the chimes being off so fast is actually insane, this man plays too much minecraft /lh

Aimsey’s confidence is everything <333

“We’re the great, we’re the best, we’re actually the best there’s ever been… oh we’re still tenth though” “It’s rigged!! I am telling you, it rigged!!”

“We were too silly!!”

Big Sales at Build Mart

Aimsey and Phil’s energy is everything

“You need white stained glass” “I have black stained glass” “That doesn’t help, you loser, good job though” AIMSEY 😂😭😭

Phil just keeps getting sassed 😂😂😂

“Guys, do you think we’re making it to dodgebolt, I think we do” “A HUNDO PERCENT!!”

Who hurt Jimmy???? Well, skyblockle, but…

Skyblockle

Who gave them permission to be this funny???

“Can we make a pickaxe real quick?” “No” “… PLEASE!!” 😭😭😭

TOP TEN ANIME BETRAYALS: BLUSHI KILLING AIMSEY’S PIG

“Forget the pig, keep mining!!!” Jimmy 😂

They’re just playing a game of telephone 😂😂😂

They did really well!! I spaced out and now they’re in 6th lol

“It’s so silly” “The silly meter on it is crazy” “Shut up!!!” Aimsey and Jimmy my beloveds <333

THEM ALL ABSOLUTELY LOSING IT WHEN THEYRE ACTUALLY IN DODGEBOLT

Dodgebolt

Oli and Jimmy <3333

Aimsey and Krinios intense eye contact my beloved

“Guys I feel sick” JIMMY 😭😭😭

This is so chaotic I’m dying /pos

KRINIOS KILLED JIM 😭😭😭

“Guys, there’s friendly fire, just to let you know, there is friendly fire” thank you Jimmy

“Beky I’m in you” “Good.” Why did she say it like that 😭

I need an Aimsey and Oli team STAT

[calumthoodshands]

hi aria! i'm sending you a big hug from across the atlantic, let me know when it arrives. it comes with an optional kiss on the cheek if you're comfortable with that. imagine you could get each member of 5sos to cover one song of your choosing, and then the group as a whole would also cover a song of your choosing, so five songs total. what are the songs? explanations are more than welcome. i love you lots xoxo bella

bella hello!! i am gladly accepting the hug and the optional kiss on the cheek omg <3 it has arrived way earlier but i had to have some thunks on this ask. so here goes ! @clumsyclifford

so i'm gonna start with Michael bc i am obsessed with his voice and if i could i'd want him to cover SO many songs oh wow. i want a million albums with his voice. but for the sake of this ask i would LOVE if he sang Waiting for the end by Linkin Park. why, you ask? well, first of all it's one of my favourite LP songs ever. second of all, i think it fits his voice, and the song has an amazing build especially in the last chorus, and it has such a sweet contrast between the verses and the chorus with the rap parts it's just SO good. it would really showcase both Michael's soft vocals and when he really pops off and really shows his unique voice. i want him to scream in the last chorus. and the harmonies simultaneously would just straight up send me to heaven. bonus point bc i am making my own rules and would imagine him actually perfoming it so that i could watch it i think he would have fun playing it as well bc linkin park songs just slap ok. slap some calum harmonies onto it and i will die happily

next i'm going with... Better by Zayn for Calum. His warm voice on that track? I would melt. The deep notes in the beginning, then stepping up, and then the chorus all the way up there? Hearing the highs and lows he can go? besides, i am so curious to hear him on an RnB song like this. I would maybe only strip it back a little in the beginning and make it a bit more industrial for the rest of it, bc he deserves a little treat. and bc i think the song isn't at its full potential. i love it, i absolutely do, but maybe with just a bit more... especially the bridge, i think they could get more out of it than we already have. (sorry zayn i swear i love you the most on the whole planet.) petition for calum to do more RnB plsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss and also narrate my life. for all of eternity. thank you sir

now with Ashton i want something slower, and nothing modern. i think he really has an... old voice, in the sense that it feels like it's from a different decade. there's this soulful, raspy tone in it i really really like and i love when he uses it in 5sos songs. So my song choice for him would probably be Everybody wants to rule the world by Tears for Fears. I would love to hear him on that chorus. This song is SO GOOD and especially the last chorus really makes it, and i think he would do great playing around with his voice on the whole song, because he can really sound so different when he wants to which could be so fun on this song!! and on top of that the drums and the whole production, i think that would really be up his alley. give it to me!! give it to HIM!

and now lastly Luke. my bro. singer boi. i think i would go with: Lego House by Ed Sheeran. It's kinda a comfort song for me and I think you would agree when i say Luke deserves more acoustic songs so this is my proposal. he would especially slay the bridge imo, and i would love to hear his whiny (affectionately!!) voice bring it to even higher heights only to crash to the ground when the instruments are all stripped back for the beginning of the very last chours. the harmonies would sound so lovely (i might bring calum in here as well i'm sry i just love his bg harmonies ok) and i would like for luke to add some ad-libs [ :)) ] and high notes and ohhhhhhh-ohhhhhhs towards the end. this song would be a good chance to show what he can do vocally without going to extremes. besides, lower register in the beginning? sign me up. i WANT that. thank you very much.

and lastly. 5sos... bois... please cover What a feeling by One Direction for me. please. please please please please. their harmonies would knock it out of the PARK. i honestly thinking slower, almost jazzy songs like this would fit them really well at times and i also wouldn't mind if they jazzed it up a little, maybe go a bit harder on the drums, maybe make it even more epic. man i would do THINGS for that. and (dont be mad at me) i think it would fit if it was just a little bit calum focused bc he has the warmest voice. maybe luke on the first verse, calum on the pre chorus, all four obviously in the chorus. then i'd like ashton on the second verse, bc he has a really good voice for songs like this one that are a bit slower and where you can really use your voice as an instrument in a way. i'd like for michael to sing the bridge an octave lower maybe to break it down for a bit, but he could really bring it forward with his voice, maybe climbing up a bit during, give it a crescendo, and really make the last chorus epic, i want him to sing the high notes and highlights with Luke over the normal chorus mainly sung by calum towards the end. man it would be AMAZING. i want it!!! really bad!!!!!

thank you so much for asking bella i love YOU lots and i hope you can halfway agree with my choices 🧡

[monstermaster13]

An Aykroydian Origin

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Every tale of terror that has ever been written has a narrator, someone to tell the story and explain what’s going on to the readers or viewers. Now in the stories you have been reading so far, the narrator often has a bonus little twist in which it turns out the Were-Aykroyd he has been telling us all about is real and that he’s one of them...but how did it turn out this way, well this story will tell you all. Nathan Forester aka Monstermaster13 was a writer and story narrator who told his own stories but often made the ‘narrator’ a mystery to all who read it, and put in a little twist in some of the stories, sometimes though his own powers would cause the events of the stories to happen for real and this caused a lot of problems for him. ‘I don’t understand how this keeps happening, some dark supernatural force keeps making my stories happen.’ ‘Are you sure you didn’t write that in?’ ‘I am. I keep seeing these Were-Aykroyds everywhere I go and these Aykroyd characters say i’m their brother even though I am not related to them.’ ‘Were-Aykroyd?’ ‘Yes, that persona I created. He’s real.’

“Sounds like the dreams you have every night.”

“Those weren’t dreams though.”

He had been having visions of this character of his, the Were-Aykroyd...ever since 2020 and those visions were of him meeting this character, the character coming to life, or him becoming said character, he would have moments in which he was outside at night and he’d feel strange and he’d hear a gurgling sound coming from his stomach as if he was possessed by a dark force and he’d hear a voice in his head telling him to let him out. But the next morning he’d always feel confused as to why this happened. He sighed as he looked through the papers he had gathered, and somehow while looking through them he came across some kind of mysterious new package. ‘I don’t remember this though.’ ‘What is it?’ ‘Some kind of package, knowing my knowledge of horror stories, this is probably some kind of cursed manuscript or something so I better not open it.’

“I think you should take a look at it.”

“Maybe...but i’m still worried.”

Carefully, he picked up the package and unwrapped it, inside was a book that looked like it was similar to a certain book known as the Necronomicon, next to the book there were several journals containing clues as to what it was. ‘Hmmm...the Aykroydomicon.’ ‘The Aykroydomicom, that’s the ancient book from one of your stories isn’t it? The one that sends all those Aykroyd characters out into our world?’ ‘Wait...how did these people find an exact copy of that?’ ‘Maybe it wasn’t them who sent it.’ Nathan examined the book, looking over the incantations and texts and journal entries, each entry went over in detail how the Aykroyds worked and why they did what they did.

“So they came from here.”

“Yes, and I think...they’re heeeere.”

Nathan shivered as the pages of the book flickered back and forth by themselves, and he attempted to dispose of the book only to get attacked. After the brief scare he had, he decided to go and get himself a drink of water and so he hurried to the kitchen to go and get his water bottle, that’s when he started getting a chill running down his spine, his supernatural sense went off. ‘Come here brother, come here.’ ‘Come here.’ He noticed the voices coming from nearby even though there was nobody there but him and his companion/assistant, ‘I keep hearing these voices. Am I dreaming?’

“Oh no, dear brother...you’re not dreaming.”

“I don’t mean to intrude but...why do you call me brother, what are you?”

The voice, or voices got closer and closer until he looked back at where the voices were coming from, that’s where he saw several characters. He recognized them, they were Elwood Blues, Jimmy Flaherty, Austin Milbarge, Grocer, Clifford Skridlow, Jack Lambert and both Ray Zalinski and Ray Stantz. All Dan Aykroyd characters from the Blues Brothers, Celtic Pride, Spies Like Us, Grosse Pointe Blank, Doctor Detroit, Getting Away With Murder, Tommy Boy, and Ghostbusters respectively. ‘Wait...you’re all…’ ‘Aykroyds? Yes, we are. And you’re our sibling.’ ‘But i’m not an Aykroyd...and how do I know this is real?’

“You’re still our brother though and we’re very loyal to you.”

“Besides, if we aren’t real, then how do you explain how you are able to talk to us?”

“Hell if I know, i’m probably just imagining this happen.”

“Does this seem imaginary to you?”

Nathan looked as one of the Aykroyds reached out and touched him, he then looked over again…’I cannot believe it, you’re real.’ ’that’s right Nathan.’ another voice spoke up, that’s when he noticed the figure that was speaking to him, the figure was one that was exactly like his except….he was around 6’1 and 249lbs, he looked rather Aykroyd-like and wore a version of the outfit Nathan usually wore, he had brown hairs on his chest, stomach and on his arms and hands, and was rather well...thicc, Nathan blushed as he noticed how thicc his rear was, the voice also sounded Aykroyd-like too. But yet parts of this being seemed similar to Nathan’s own, it’s just he was a rather Aykroydian version, very big and strong - in his eyes there was a flaming glow.

“Are you me?”

“Well technically I am, in a way.”

“What do you mean by that?”

‘Well what I mean by that is that I am, i’m that persona you created in your stories.’ ‘The Were-Aykroyd?’ ‘Why yes, the one and the same. You know, I have been lucky enough to read your work and study you in action. You seem to be quite a hit with your fans and they really do love your work.’ ‘Thanks, yeah I know but how do you know?’ ‘I’ve been here since last year, i’ve been inside you, asking you to let me out.’ ‘That was you?’ ‘Yes, each night i’ve been trying to get you to show that side of you that you show in your work.’

“You mean?”

“Yes...you always seem to forget about that part.”

“The part where you wish to become Dan Aykroyd of course.”

“What?”

‘Oh yes...those telepathic wishes of yours. You love Aykroyd, you adore him and you wish that you were him. That’s where I come in, I am a Were-Aykroyd after all and you created me to help you.’ ‘But I don’t understand how I can be talking to my own character like this.’ ‘This is no dream sequence or hallucination, you are talking to me and i’m speaking to you.’ ‘You know, I think that it wasn’t fair that those people thought you were insane when you tried to tell people about us.’ ‘I know, I know...nobody believes me.’

“But I do.”

“I know you do...but still.”

Nathan was overwhelmed by this, unlike in those other transformation stories where it’s sometimes stereotyped as being somewhat of a punishment, you know the ones that have mind-wiping scenes to make it sure they’ll never be themselves ever again, this was going to be something different. He couldn’t believe his own character was speaking to him, this ‘Were-Aykroyd’ who pretty much was coaxing him into this. ‘I know how you feel, everyone thinks you’re insane, you see supernatural beings everywhere you go. You have a supernatural ability that you view as more of a curse than a gift.’ ‘It is, all of my creations come alive and sometimes...I cannot help it.’

It was established at this point that he had a quasi-attraction to Dan Aykroyd, he realized that he was very much becoming an Aykroyd simp and he knew it, he didn’t need to be reminded of it because he already was getting reminded of it every single day and night, all the dreams about becoming him, at first they were horrifying but eventually he found them to be kind of nice...kind of erotic in some aspects. He blushed as he thought about that, he cursed himself for making Dan/The Were-Aykroyd such an alluring creature, yet he could see himself being entranced by him and being turned like that since it felt...nice, it felt nice. ‘Dan’ was like his spirit guide and friend after all.

He had been hearing Dan’s voice in his mind ever since early last year, and he thought he was going crazy, or rather he thought that other people would think he was going crazy. He of course wasn’t going insane, it was just he couldn’t help but think about turning into him even if he didn’t think about it. ‘I know that you think about being Dan Aykroyd a lot, you like me don’t you. Of course you do, you admire the majestic Aykroydian charm that comes with being a Were-Aykroyd after all.’ ‘I don’t know, i’m happy being myself yet…’ ‘ Yet you crave all things weird and Aykroydian, no matter how hard you try to ignore the craving.’

“I actively seek out all things Aykroyd.”

“And when you don’t get anything, you search even harder.”

“Yes, I do.”

Dan was of course right, Nathan couldn’t resist those desires to see himself or others get turned. The author couldn’t help but see himself slowly changing into Dan everytime he looked in the mirror and he couldn’t help but be oddly attracted to his transforming appearance in the stories, it seemed like it was destined to happen. That massage scene in Diamonds was permanently implanted into his mind, making him constantly think about turning into Dan in that scene and he couldn’t help but want it. ‘I can tell you want it badly.’ ‘What?’ ‘You want to Aykroyd out, all of your dreams have this happen to you and I can grant you that wish of yours.’ ‘You mean the wish to turn into him that I didn’t make?’

“Now don’t be modest, I know that you wished for that.”

“No, I didn’t…”

“Your voice may say no but your mind clearly says yes.”

“No, I don’t want this.”

‘Now why do you talk to me like i’m your enemy? We don’t have to fight like this. It doesn’t have to be like this. Hell, i’d rather it wasn’t.’ ‘What do you mean?’ ‘Well, think about it...I could help you, i’m helping you. You want this badly and I can help you. I know you'd like it.' Nathan shivered, feeling afraid, afraid of what would happen. 'But what if I cannot carry on as myself?' 'You'll still be able to live your usual life, it's just that you'll be a Were-Aykroyd and you'll be like me.'

"I don't know, I don't know if I want to become a Were-Aykroyd."

'Alright I know what you're thinking, you're thinking...let me help you, you become Aykroyd, you're cursed to be a Were-Aykroyd. Where's the pay-off, right?' 'You're not going to make me sell my soul to you, are you?' 'Me? Nah. I may be able to possess you in your dreams but i'm no demon.' 'I just don't trust you and I don't see why I should.' 'You really want this, don't you?' 'I guess so but...' 'But nothing, you've got someone who can help with that and that someone is me.'

"I suppose you're right."

"Now let me out, become the Were-Aykroyd you've always wanted."

Nathan would have normally said no, he had been trying to resist Dan's influence but there was no way he was going to ever escape those words. Throughout 2020, the Were-Aykroyd was always there. He'd always say...'you may be safe during the day but once night falls you will be mine' and Nathan would be terribly afraid of what that meant, but he knew it was a line from one of his Aykroyd-verse novels/stories, he knew that it was used by the Were-Aykroyd himself. The line sounded sinister even though it was actually quite reassuring, the Were-Aykroyd had a bond with his creator and he would go to great lengths to make sure that bond wasn't broken.

Much like Aykroyd himself, the Were-Aykroyd was very loyal and a good friend, he always had a motto and that philosophy always was a 'good Were-Aykroyd always cares for his friends and they look out for him too', and that's what he did. 'Remember, a good Were-Aykroyd always'...he would say, whenever he said this, it always seemed to resonate in Nathan's head, making him feel like he was being hypnotized by those words. 'I don't know why but I feel like listening to you...what's wrong with me?' 'Nothing's wrong, I am just casting my spell on you.'

"I'm sorry but I didn't ask for this.."

"Shhh, you know you did. And a good Were-Aykroyd always gets what they ask for."

The author/monsterologist shuddered and attempted to resist but he couldn't help but think about transforming, and the more he thought about those dreams he had...the more he wanted it, clearly turning Aykroydian was something that he wanted, he reached over to his mirror and he saw his reflection morph into Dan Aykroyd's one, he gasped and then began to feel like he wanted to obey his inner Aykroyd. 'Yes, you're right.' 'Indeed I am, and you're a good Aykroyd too, aren't you?' 'Yes...'

"And you want to become Dan Aykroyd, don't you?"

"Yes...yes...no I mean no, I don't."

"Now now, it's not good to try and resist."

Nathan didn't know why but he was starting to fall under 'Dan's spell, he felt like listening to him and he felt like obeying him and carrying out his orders, he attempted to resist but he kept thinking about his transformation...seeing Aykroyd looking back at him in the mirror made him want it, he blushed as he thought about this. He tried to get those words out of his mind but he just couldn't, all he could think about were those dreams. That library dream haunted him in particular, it took place in England and he had during the first wave of the Covid19 pandemic, there were these Aykroyd characters running around and it was unclear if they were people that were turned Aykroydian prior to the events of the dream's story or if they had always been like that.

All he knew was that he was running from them with his friends, but he never understood why he was running from them...they didn't look like they wanted to harm him, he remembered hiding in the library with his friends only for the Aykroyds to break in. He remembered seeing a woman being hypnotized and converted, slowly changing in appearance and gender as she became a Were-Aykroyd, he tried to look away but he wanted that himself, he kept 'wanting' it, he attempted to hide that but the Aykroyds knew he wanted it, he really wanted it, ooooooh sooooo badly. That's when one of them turned him and within a few seconds he felt himself turning into Jimmy Flaherty from Celtic Pride.

That dream made him wonder...it made him think...'why did those Aykroyds come after me and my friends? Why was I running? Why was I enjoying the transformation so much?', all those thoughts were running through his mind along with Dan's instructions. 'Because obviously you were afraid, afraid that your siblings would hurt you. Those Aykroyds are your brothers after all.' 'But i'm not an Aykroyd...' 'Oh but you are, you're a Were-Aykroyd, or rather you will be.'

"I don't know if I am ready for this..."

"There there, let me help you...relax."

He sighed and then groaned, as he did....the essence of Dan Aykroyd entered his body in a manner akin to possession, his stomach gurgled as he felt like he had eaten something awful...he clutched his stomach with his left hand. His hands slowly began to lose imperfection as the skin on them and the rest of his body matured, as if it was slowly turning him into a much older person, he gasped as he saw this happening.

"What's happening?"

"Your wish is coming true and i'm helping you."

"But I didn't ask or wish for this."

"Oh yes you did, you said telepathically in your sleep numerous times and I quote...'I wish I was Dan Aykroyd'."

"Nooo, nooo...I didn't."

Hairs slowly sprouted on the palms of his hands as his hands enlarged, his fingers thickening in the process and his arms broadened, slowly bulking up as the hairs spread on his arms, he tried to pull the hairs out but they grew back. With his skin and his developing arm and hand hair he looked like he was in his 40's or 60's, specifically the latter...like he was becoming what was commonly known as a DILF.

He had been narrating these transformations time and time again yet he had never experienced them himself except in his dreams, and it seemed those dreams were now coming true. He groaned as his dark red button up shirt tightened, the shirt had fit him perfectly earlier but now it was straining due to his chest and torso slowly beginning to grow and broaden in the same way his arms had, pushing against the shirt. 'Pop! Pop!' two buttons popped off the shirt and bounced around the room.

"Ugh....if this shirt rips.."

Two more buttons popped off as his stomach swelled, making him look like he was putting on weight. With a few rips in the back his shirt began to tear open a little, peeling back his shirt collar he reached down and saw brown hairs growing on his chest, the hairs were spreading on his stomach too which was much larger and he groaned as his shirt ripped up in a few more places. 'Oh no...' 'You can always get a new one.' 'Not like that one I can't.' He groaned, examining his much larger frame and touching his stomach with his right hand...he blushed, he looked like he was gaining 249lbs of weight.

"Oh my god..what's happening?"

"Why you're getting your wish."

"But i'm becoming so..."

"THICC...yes, you are."

Nathan examined his body and then felt his jeans get a little bit tighter in the back as his legs altered and his rear plumped, that's when 'Dan' decided to make it so he'd enjoy his transformation, without a second thought or any form of hesitation the transforming monsterologist felt his much larger rear and couldn't help but purr a little over it. 'Oh my...so, sexy...so thiccc, I want this. No, no I don't..stupid thicc sexy Aykroyd, why did I have to make the Were-Aykroyd so sexy?'. 'Look at you, you're becoming just like Aykroyd himself, and look at how you're obviously enjoying it'...'Oh yes...I enjoy it so much, wait, no i'm not!'

"Don't resist now, a good Were-Aykroyd lets his transformation happen."

The belt of his jeans undid itself a little as he slowly grew in height from 5'7 to 5'8 and then to 5'9 and to 5'10, he examined himself as his shoulders and back broadened with a crunch while his height shot from 5'10 to 5'11, he was much taller than he normally was and that's when his jeans adjusted themselves to fit his much larger lower-half, he was oh so large and thicc...and he couldn't help but be fascinated even though he was horrified. His socks slowly started to strain as his feet enlarged from within them, growing bigger. 'Dan' egged him on in his mind, telling him that it was good to transform and that what was happening was natural, a couple of minutes later his socks burst apart to reveal his much larger feet, two toes on both feet stuck together and gained a webbed appearance.

He slowly grew in height to 6'0 and then to 6'1 as his neckline altered, his new body felt alien to him and less like it was his own...he had been writing Were-Aykroyd transformations and narrating them and now he himself was turning, he was finding it difficult to resist some newly developing traits, he couldn't help but suddenly speak in what was known as Aykroydian techno-talk/techno-babble, and he covered his mouth in shock when he did this. There was no denying it, he was turning into Dan himself and he didn't know why he couldn't resist 'simping' over himself. 'Is it always this erotic to turn into a Were-Aykroyd? I don't remember writing my transformation tales quite like this.' 'You like it, don't you?' 'Yes...yes, no..wait, I don't. Please, i'm sorry for simping and being obsessed with this sort of thing, I promise to not write any more Aykroyds if that makes you happy.'

"Oh no no..don't cry my Were-Aykroyd, be happy with what is happening to you."

"But look at me..."

"Yes, you're very sexy...you're such a sexy Were-Aykroyd."

"But I don't wanna be like Dan Aykroyd anymore, please."

"But now you are, my good Were-Aykroyd. It's so precious seeing you struggle."

"I can't write stories like this."

'Oh but you can, you can spread your Aykroydian love to all your fans and readers, make them into Aykroyds just like you.' 'Wait...as in more than one Were-Aykroyd?' 'Oh yes, you'll be able to make more Were-Aykroyds and I know there are a lot of people that you'll want to see be like that.' He attempted to resist Dan's words but he knew that those urges were going to surface, those Aykroydian urges, those pesky Aykroydian urges the victims of Were-Aykroyd transformations often experienced while transforming, the urges they couldn't surpress.

The writer and narrator examined his body which was definitely much larger than normal, he definitely knew that he had Dan Aykroyd's body and it wasn't long until his neckline followed suit and his hair darkened, becoming a bit wavier, there was a bald spot poking out near the top but it didn't seem like that much of a problem, since hair grew around that hair too. His brow and forehead altered, his eyebrows thickened as his eyes widened, one turning green while the other remained brown, he felt his nose start to itch and he began to scratch it, which made his nose broaden and grow into a perfect copy of Aykroyd's nose complete with the little cleft popping up in the middle, his features slowly warped and plumped up, distorting into a perfect copy of Aykroyd's own.

This seemed oddly natural to him, mainly that was due to his own mind slowly altering to make him think this was indeed natural, he was starting to think differently about this, he thought of it was a horrifying at first but his mind was making him want it, making him desire it, to be a thicc sexy Were-Aykroyd. 'Oh yes, oh yes...I feel good, being so thicc, sexy and Aykroydian makes me feel reeeeally nice. Like i've always been this way, i've always been like that. Wait, no I don't!' His mind was telling him otherwise.

"I can't seem to think straight, I keep thinking that i'm..."

'Dan Aykroyd? Why yes, that's because you are. A Were-version of him to be exact.' 'A Were-Aykroyd? Like in my stories?' 'Oh yes, you've been writing about them and now you're becoming one and doesn't it feel natural?' 'No...' 'A good Were-Aykroyd always embraces what he is, and you're a good Were-Aykroyd aren't you? Of course you are.' Those words 'A good Were-Aykroyd always'...echoed in his mind again, causing him to go into trance as his voice deepened and contorted, becoming like Dan Aykroyd's voice. 'Yess...a good Were-Aykroyd always embraces his transformation and isn't afraid of being what he is.'

"Indeed, and you're such a good Were-Aykroyd."

"What kind of Were-Aykroyd am I?"

'You're a king Were-Aykroyd with a compelling voice. You can convert others...you like doing that, it feels good, that way you're never going to be alone. Friends come and go, but your Aykroydian followers will last forever.' 'Am I powerful?' 'Why yes you are, sometimes you tend to forget how powerful you truly are but you know just how powerful you are when you utter the phrase that I have spoken to you which triggers the trance.' 'Do they all listen to me?' 'Oh yes they do, they have to listen to you and respect you, you are a king after all...a king Were-Aykroyd.' 'Woah, I must be pretty powerful.'

"Indeed you are."

'Does that make me their god since you know I created the Were-Aykroyd lore in general in my stories and now my stories are real. Does that mean I would probably be viewed as delusional with some kind of god complex or is this some kind of Lovecraftian nightmare fuel ordeal? Oh wait, never mind it probably doesn't since only those with too much time on their hands who watch way too many episodes of Game Theory or similar Youtube channels would think so such things. And sometimes not everything has to make sense.' 'You're a king Were-Aykroyd, you have no time for such petty things. Besides, those types of people who question you are beneath you.' 'Right.' 'A good Were-Aykroyd always knows how to persuade anyone.' 'Indeed.'

He held his head and attempted to resist once last time but those words had fully implanted themselves into his mind, his mind and personality contorted into those of what were commonly known as the 'Were-Aykroyd' he had created, traces of who he was were still there, he wasn't reduced to being a savage beast/'mindless creature' unlike in most of these TF scenarios, he was given the mind of a brilliant tactician and strategist, the mind of a skilled leader who could create more Were-Aykroyds with his dark influence, which made him feel good in so many ways.

His memories and personality were warping further, he didn't seem to mind though as he knew that this was necessary, as 'Nathan' seemed to fade away with a few more utterings of 'that's right, you're a good Were-Aykroyd'. 'I am a good Were-Aykroyd', 'yes, you're Dan Aykroyd, a were-version of him.' 'I am...' he sighed as he willingly let some newly developing personality traits and memories take over him, those were becoming those of Dan Aykroyd himself...'Wait is it my name Nathan? No wait...I don't look and feel like a Nathan, I feel like...' 'A Daniel? That's because you are and always will be..lok at you, you're a Were-Aykroyd, just like in those stories. You have gotten what you've always wanted.'

"I have..."

'Now, whenever I say 'a good Were-Aykroyd always'...you will become this, you will become Dan and you will always be a Were-Aykroyd no matter what form others may try to turn you into.' 'Which is perfect.' 'You also may become Dan at night or if it's dark in general, or whenever I feel like taking over you, which is going to be a common thing for both of us.'

"I don't mind that."

"That's a good Were-Aykroyd."

With a few more utterings of that phrase, Nathan was gone...there was now Daniel Edward Aykroyd, or 'Dan' for short, and he was a 'Were-Aykroyd', and he knew what he wanted to do, he wanted to turn his friends into fellow Were-Aykroyds and he knew where to start. He used a hypnotic spell to bring Kevin over and Kevin was astounded when he saw the new Aykroydian version of his bestie. He used his powers to hypnotize and condition him before turning him into an Aykroyd....that's when he noticed Jack and Damon coming over and he did the same, but that's when he thought. 'What about turning non-Aykroyd characters into Aykroyds? Specifically ones from Aykroyd movies?'

That plan was one he managed to come into fruition thanks to his dark powers, the first victim of this new plan was Jjax, the hero from the 1996 film Feeling Minnesota, he looked and sounded like he was Keanu Reeves and that's because he was a Keanu Reeves character. Jjax thought that 'Dan' had an eerie resemblance to Ben Costikyan. 'Hello Jjax. I've heard a lot about you. I've heard that you're quite a dashing rogue.'

"You look very much like Ben and you sound a lot like him too, minus the accent of course."

"And you look like you'd make a fine Aykroyd."

Jjax jumped back and attempted to question Dan, but before he could..he couldn't help but be enticed by how impressive Dan was. He could tell that there was definitely very striking about him and indeed there was. Dan was thicc and strong, in his eyes there was a flaming glow. He couldn't help but fall under his spell upon gazing into his eyes and he found himself having dreams of wanting to be an Aykroyd too, which made him pant.

"That's right, you want to be a Were-Aykroyd too don't you."

"Yes...if that is what will make you happy, sir."

"Why yes, it will. If you become a Were-Aykroyd...i'll be glad you did."

He sighed as he couldn't help but think about becoming a fellow Were-Aykroyd and as he did he noticed a warm sensation that was spreading through him, the sensation slowly surfacing on him as hairs that were slowly growing on his arms and hands which both enlarged and broadened at the same time. The hairs were not the same color as his hair though, in fact they were turning from a blackish color to brown, his shirt slowly began to stretch and strain as his torso and chest broadened, his stomach following suit. His skin matured and lost imperfections as the hairs from before slowly sprouted on his stomach and on his chest.

He was already the same height as Dan but his weight had increased to the same as him to follow up as his rear inflated, giving him a thicc build while his legs broadened and stretched a little. A few popping sounds were heard as the buttons from his shirt popped off and his shirt nearly ripped, his shoes slowly tightened and burst apart as his feet enlarged, he felt a tingling sensation in between them as two of the toes on each foot connected at the knuckle, taking on a webbed appearance. He now possessed very Aykroydian feet as his back and shoulders broadened while his neckline altered. He examined himself and couldn't help but oddly entranced when he saw his transforming appearance, he coudn't help but think of how 'sexy' he was becoming, he was naturally already very handsome with roguish good looks but now he was becoming even more attractive as his black hair remained the same style-wise but shortened and turned brown with his brow and forehead altering, his eyebrows thickening as they turned the same color as his hair.

Naturally Dan thought it was pretty 'sexy' to see another guy being influenced by him and turning Aykroydian and Jjax was starting to think of Dan as a 'brother', he couldn't help but feel good about his transformation, being a thicc yet sexy Were-Aykroyd felt natural to him as his eyes widened, one turning green while the other remained brown, his nose broadened as a small cleft popped up in the middle of it and his nose took on a similar shape to Dan's own nose. His lips became kissable as his features plumped up and became Aykroydian in appearance, making him look a lot like he could be a cousin or sibling to Ben, as his voice deepened and contorted, maturing and contorted into becoming the Aykroydian voice that went with his appearance.

Dan used his powers to assist him by conditioning him with the phrase a 'good Were-Aykroyd always'...which triggered the mental phase of the transformation, slowly conditioning his mind and personality into the more Aykroydian variant but giving him enhanced aspects of his normal personality. It didn't take long until Jjax had finally become just like him, a thicc, sexy Were-Aykroyd. 'I look amazing, well i've always looked amazing, thank you so much, brother.' 'No problem, that's what brothers do for each-other.'

"I can't wait to make more Were-Aykroyds with you."

"Well there's a lot of other non-Aykroyd characters from Aykroyd movies that we haven't turned yet. Come on, let's get to work."

And thus with that Dan and Jjax decided to convert some more of Dan's friends into Were-Aykroyds and also went after a few non-Aykroyd characters from non-Aykroyd movies, including Emmet from Spies Like Us. Dan always felt like Emmet wasn't the right type for the lovely Karen Boyer and so he decided to fix that by transforming him from his Chevy Chase self into a Were-Aykroyd, after all a character played by Donna Dixon deserves an Aykroyd. It wasn't long until the Aykroyd characters from earlier caught up with their 'brother' and hugged him, they were glad he came to his senses and awakened his inner 'Aykroyd' and was ready to share his gift with others.

As for what happened later, it wasn't long until a full on Were-Aykroyd invasion took place in the city. And even superheroes were falling victim to it, and as for our hero/narrator...now whenever 'a good Were-Aykroyd' is uttered, he will become the Were-Aykroyd he is. Now he is permantely half Were-Aykroyd and even if you try to turn him into a form like Sulley, Tug or even other characters you think he'd look cute as, his body and DNA will reject those forms and he'll just turn back into himself and turn into the Were-Aykroyd. Now this Were-Aykroyd doesn't change on full moon nights, just whenever it gets dark or if it's night in general, or sometimes at inopportune moments during the day, as sometimes 'Dan/The Were-Aykroyd' will take over during the day, so you better be careful whenever Nathan is around.

That's how the narrator of these little stories became the Were-Aykroyd, you see Nathan wrote these as a way of conveying awareness of Were-Aykroyds and now that he is one and his stories are indeed real, there is likely a chance those who read these will know why the earlier stories that lead up to this one in the Aykroyd-verse result in the narrator turning out to be a Were-Aykroyd, because he was turned into one. Now, it's your turn. Look into my eyes and listen to my voice, i'm going to count down from 10 and when I get closer to 1, the deeper into trance you go. 10, 9, 8...ooh..look at you, already falling under my spell, 7, 6, 5...That's right, drift away. 4, 3, 2...1.

There we go, now when I say 'a good Were-Aykroyd' you will think of how good it would be to be a Were-Aykroyd, ready? 'A good Were-Aykroyd'..that's right, think good Aykroydian thoughts, I see you're thinking of Aykroyd already, you want to be like him don't ya? Of course you do. 'obey' 'a good Were-Aykroyd always listens', and I see you are listening, good. Now, allow me to help you and in exchange you can help me. Because a good Were-Aykroyd always helps, and that's what you are. I want you to concentrate now, listen carefully, listen to me, that's right, you're a good Aykroyd, now morph. Just look at you now, growing that proper thicc Aykroyd body and look at how sensually desirable and sexy you are, you're becoming so Aykroydian. 10, 9, 8, 7...6, 5, 4, 3..2.1. And your voice is getting very Aykroyd-like too as is your personality, your mind is telling you 'yes, you are an Aykroyd', which you are. Awaken my fellow Were-Aykroyd, it's time to go and see what you can do.

[yearninqheart]

loneliness was built for two

oh what a tragic way of living it was to be utterly alone during an endless lifespan.

pairing: morpheus x reader

word count: 1.5k

tags: gender-neutral!reader, immortal!reader, unreliable narrator, past lovers, lowkey endgame, pre-sandman series,

warnings: minor implications of physical abuse, my rusty writing (pls its been months im sorry), uploading this at like 9pm so sorry for any errors

notes: yes this was inspired was the bonus calliope episode. no i do not have any original ideas ok i do but i just do not have the time/energy to complete them yet

You sensed his presence the moment he appeared in the dark corner of your bedroom. You didn’t need to glance towards your left to know that he was standing there, looking at you with an unreadable expression as always as you kept your attention glued to the moon up in the night sky. 

Neither of you knew what to say, so you simply remained quiet. For the next few moments, the two of you appeared to remain frozen in place as you raked your minds for absolutely anything to say. Surely there was something that could be said to break the awkward silence neither of you could ever recall experiencing in the past. Has things really changed that much?

It had been years–centuries to be exact– since you’ve both last seen each other but of all things that could be said to break the silence, the line Morpheus decided to go with was: “Hi.” 

You bit back a smile at his awkward greeting and for a moment, you almost considered removing your lip from your teeth. He always used to hate whenever you’d try to hide your smile. 

He also used to hate you. Or at least that's how he made you feel.

“I’m sorry, I-I shouldn’t have bothered you.” You mentally cursed at yourself for stumbling over your words. And for calling out to him. “You didn’t have to come really. I just-”

“You could never be a bother.” His voice was soft. Much softer than the last time you spoke—or fought, rather—and for a moment the tenderness almost made you forget how harsh he last sounded. Almost. 

“Well then I apologize for wasting your time, My Lord.” You said dismissively, finally turning your head to face him. 

You quickly regretted that decision when you watched his eyes widen in a mix of shock, horror, and worry as the bruise blossoming on the right side of your neck was now clearly shown to him. Quickly turning your head around you hoped that he somehow wouldn’t have noticed but you knew it was no use. 

“You’re hurt.” He pointed out the obvious. You refrained yourself from scoffing at the observation and instead decide to gnaw on the inside of your cheek. 

You wondered if a part of his reaction was due to your formalities when you addressed him. Back then he was always ‘Morpheus’ or ‘Dear’ to you while ‘My Lord’ was for those who kneeled at his throne. He would have never let the day come that you stood in front of the throne rather than beside or on it. Even now he would still stand before you—even after all that's been said and done between you two and the centuries you’ve been apart. 

“I am fine.” There’s not much left that you could do anyways. 

“Who did this to you?” 

“I said that I am fine-”

“Then why did you call out for me?” 

Silence blanketed the air of your bedroom as you found yourself unable to respond to his question. Not because you didn’t know how to but rather, because your pride would never let you say that the reason you had called upon the Lord of Dreams was because you were scared. 

He had made you feel safe for so long when you were his and even after everything that’s happened, you’ve yet to find anyone else who gave you that same sense of security that you would call out for them after such a bitter parting. Perhaps that was why you didn’t hesitate to call out for him. Afterall he did vow to always be there for you, even if your relationship wasn’t in the same place as when he first made that promise to you. Morpheus was a man of his words. 

“It was Jesse.” You quietly admitted, shifting your gaze to your ankles while you ignored his stare. “They got into some fight, again, and I was just caught in the crossfire of it all.” 

It was only partly a lie what you told him but it was for the sake of your friend, even after what they had done to you. Yes your friend did get into another fight after another long night of drinking that almost led them to getting kicked out but it wasn’t the crossfire that resulted in your injury but rather, Jesse themselves. The fight was between the two of you anyways but you knew the lengths that Morpheus would go to get revenge so you acted like your heart didn’t ache at the fact that you had probably lost another friend over something stupid. It appeared that losing those you loved the most in your immortal life was the downside to your blessing of an immortal life. Or was it actually a curse?

“What do you want me to do?” He asked softly. Genuinely. No biting tone or malice intent behind any of his words. He just wanted to be here. As he once vowed to do so long ago. 

You hadn’t considered his question prior to calling him however. In the heat of the moment when their hands were still wrapped around your throat you had used up the last of your oxygen to call for him before darkness wrapped around your eyes and you collapsed, or so you led yourself to believe. 

What happened after you lost consciousness was still a mystery to you. A kind stranger who claimed to pried Jesse off of you a second after you hit the ground had stayed with you until you regained consciousness—which according to them, was just a few seconds later—and offered to drive you back to your apartment which led you both now here. 

“I could leave if you truly want?” Morpheus had begun to walk towards the door but you quickly shut him down, shocking not only him but yourself when your hand flew out to grab his own as a response.

“Please don’t.” He stiffened in shock at the unexpected action but obliged to your request nonetheless. His response came a nod as he stood there awkwardly by your bed as you held his hand. Your hold on him was loose, almost as if you were scared reality would ruin the moment and you realized this was all a dream. But you had refused to return to the Dreaming since the night you left and in turn, Morpheus hadn’t paid you any dreams ever since. Or nightmares, thankfully.

He squeezed your hand then bit back a smile when your grip on him tightened. He desperately wanted to pull you into him and wrap himself around you like he used to do so many years ago but times have changed. People change and he told himself his feelings have as well given the centuries you spent apart but tonight only proved his thoughts wrong. 

“Can I go back?” Morpheus turned to look at you confusingly. “To the Dreaming I mean, can I return to it one day?”

Oh.

It was odd to see the Dream Lord unable to respond. Oftentimes than not he usually knew exactly what to say or do in any given situation except for when it was with you. 

Desire had once called you a liability due to your unpredictable nature during a family gathering of the Endless siblings and Dream just almost reached their seat at the table before Death grabbed his arm to stop him. She may have managed to save the gathering from becoming a bloodbath but the stares as sharp as daggers being thrown across the table did little to ease the new tension that Desire seemed to love whenever he was near. 

Perhaps in some ways they were right. There definitely had been situations where you were pulled into his messes due to your affiliation with the Dreaming and its ruler but you knew what you were getting yourself into when you first began seeking him out in his realm. And he knew what he was getting himself into when he began to let you. Or at least, to some extent he did. 

“Morpheus?” 

He wondered if you noticed the way he almost stumbled upon his words and nearly replied with, ‘Yes, dearest?’. 

You wondered if he noticed how you were almost expecting it and the pang of pain that struck you when it didn’t come.

“You can visit anytime you’d like.” 

You didn’t reply after that. Instead, you glanced up at him with a smile he hasn’t been able to see in such a long time and he understood what it was that you were trying to say. You almost forgot that you were still holding his hand until he gave it another reassuring squeeze and reached for his leather pouch. 

Sand was sprinkled over your eyes and you felt as if the world around you was spinning violently as your vision turned to dark. You briefly felt strong arms wrap around your shoulders as your back met with the familiar surface of the bed before you finally felt yourself let go, your consciousness going to a place you had dared not enter for centuries until now. 

I’ll see you back home.