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rosylix · 2 months ago

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flower

짙은 어둠 속에 피어난, 한 송이 꽃처럼 𔓘

after practicing with felix, you try to go back to normal. unfortunately, the universe doesn't seem to want that for you.

pairing: bff!felix × gn!reader

wc: 7.3k

content: two pining idiots, inexperienced reader, fluff! (but make it awkward), slight angst, smut?ish, only one bed trope kinda lol, wet dream (like kinda somno? not really but just in case), 'dude' is used gender neutrally. umm yea! college au

a/n: so i got a bit carried away and added way more plot than necessary here. woops. also made it a college au bc why not! kinda made them nerds sorry lol (they were always nerds.)

so this is the first segment of the final part. aka part 3 but there will be a part 4 [dizzy emoji].. for now i hope you enjoy this bit! 𖹭

[also read on ao3]

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

—

A week passes, and contrary to your expectations, the two of you actually do go back to normal. At least, Felix seems to have, so even if your brain still feels a little funny around him you follow suit and pretend nothing happened.

Not that it's been easy. Especially when his neck was still covered in those stupid marks you left. Thankfully, he can cover them up pretty well (you know, considering the state you left him in) but it was still irritating as hell; seeing the shape of one just barely peeking out of his hoodie or the way you’d find your eyes instinctively drawn to his neck whenever you saw him throughout the week.

The marks have faded to the point of being barely visible, but they're permanently seared into your brain, along with the memory of him underneath you. But that’s all it is now, a memory. You make sure of it.

And it's fine. Mostly. It’s easy enough to ignore any lingering awkwardness by focusing on more important things. For instance, midterms are coming up, and Felix is losing his mind.

He’s sprawled out on the floor of his room, papers spread out around him and a pout on his lips. “Ugh, I can’t believe I’m gonna have to study all weekend,” he whines, throwing his pencil down in frustration. He’s been studying for hours and he’s already at the ‘pulling his hair out’ phase.

“Yeah…” you agree with a half sympathetic, half amused smile. He always gets like this around exam time.

He lets his head fall onto the ground in front of him, narrowly avoiding the various papers, pencils, and textbooks littering the floor. "Why do they have to make these fucking tests so hard? It's not like the stuff we're learning is even relevant to anything. Oh my god. I'm gonna fail,” he says, voice muffled from under the carpet.

“You’re being dramatic,” you laugh as you toss the textbook you’d been reading for your own class aside.

Felix groans and (dramatically) turns over on his back. “I am not being dramatic. I’m suffering!” he exclaims, bringing his hands to cover his face. “I am dying. I’m a dead man and you don’t care. You're gonna have to plan my funeral after this.”

You roll your eyes. “Ohh nooo. You have to study over the weekend. It’s the end of the world.”

He peeks out from under his hands to glare at you. “I'm glad this is so amusing to you. You're supposed to be my best friend but you're doing nothing to help. Wow. I’ll haunt you when I'm dead after this.”

You laugh and roll your eyes again. This time, your eyes seem to catch on how his hoodie is pushed up above his waist a little from when he flopped onto the floor, showing a sliver of skin.

...Seriously? Focus. Think about literally anything else right now.

Shaking your head, you slide off the bed and make your way to him, sitting down and crossing your legs next to his head. “Sit up and I’ll help you study,” you sigh.

"But I don't wannaaaa,” he whines, but he starts to sit up anyway. “I just wanna relax,” he pouts like a child, looking up at you with his signature puppy eyes. “Help me procrastinate instead?”

You laugh in disbelief. “You've procrastinated enough. Shouldn't you focus?”

(You haven’t been very focused either, but that's besides the point.)

He shakes his head fervently and slumps against you with a groan. “Nooo. Stop being responsible. Let's take a break.”

You huff, choosing to ignore the way your heart beats a little faster when he leans against you. “You’re so annoying,” you say, trying to sound frustrated but you can’t help if it comes out a little fondly. “Alright, fine. We have been at it for a while,” you admit.

He pulls back and grins, all too familiar with your inability to deny him when he’s being a big baby like this. It's too effective. It’s actually a little infuriating how good he is at being cute, and how effective it is on you. You cave. Every time. Though, this time he looks particularly pleased with himself.

“See? Even you couldn’t be the responsible one for that long,” he snickers. “I knew you’d give in.”

You groan and look away, as if that will somehow counteract his point. “You're a bad influence.”

He laughs again, shifting backwards before flopping back down to the floor, but this time he lays his head in your lap, smiling up at you. The close proximity has your heart fluttering in your chest and you swear you can feel yourself overheating a little. Why is he like this?

This is normal. It’s normal. Chill.

He grins up at you, oblivious to your internal crisis, and he makes himself more comfortable in your lap, shifting his body a little. "There. See? Isn't this so much better than studying?"

You swallow. The warm weight of his head in your lap, the way he peers up at you through thick lashes, hair falling around him like a halo, some of it falling into his eyes... It's— it's something.

You clear your throat, gently pushing him off, ignoring his little frown as you do so. You stand up and extend your hand down to him and sigh. “Come on. Let's go procrastinate then.”

“Ugh, why—” he starts to protest but you grab his hand and help pull him up anyway. “What are you doing? I was comfy,” he pouts.

You give him a sly look. “So, you don't wanna make cookies with me?”

You have to resist the urge to laugh at the look on his face. “Wait, really?” He perks up instantly, eyes glowing.

“Yeah, I mean, if you want,” you smile.

He bounces on his feet. “Yes! Can we make the ones with the white chocolate chips? The store finally had them when I checked last time.”

You make a face of mock disgust as he starts pulling you towards the door. “No, we are not making the ones with white chocolate chips. They're atrocious.”

“What?!” he gasps, acting scandalized. “Fuck you. They're good!”

You roll your eyes at him as he pulls you into the kitchen. He’s still holding onto your hand. It should be normal, but since when has anything felt normal these past few days?

“White chocolate chips are fine! I don’t get why you don’t like them,” he continues with a pout, finally letting go of your hand to rummage through the kitchen cabinets.

“They're not even chocolate, Felix,” you point out, watching in amusement as he struggles to reach the top shelf.

“Okay? I'm failing to see your point," he replies, making a little noise of triumph when he finally reaches whatever he’s looking for.

You just shake your head. “Yeah, whatever…” You help him set some things on the counter before sighing. “You're so lucky your dorm has a kitchen. If I had one I swear I'd be baking stuff like every single day.”

“I guess I am lucky.” He laughs, grabbing the mixing bowl from the corner cabinet and placing it on the counter. “Isn't there a shared one for your floor or something?”

“Yeah, but it's…” you shudder.

“Ah. Yeah…” He pauses, pondering something, before raising an eyebrow. “So that's why you come over so much? For the kitchen?”

“Duh.”

"I knew it… You’re only using me for free oven access?” he teases. "I’m wounded.” He drapes his hand over his forehead in a dramatic flourish and slumps against the counter.

“Yep, you caught me,” you laugh. “You and Hannie keep it somewhat clean at least.”

“My own best friend… The betrayal…” he tries to pout but ends up giggling. Then, he seems to think of something and claps his hands excitedly. “You should move in with me!”

Whoa. “W-What?”

“You know how Jisung is always over at Minho's? He's gonna officially move in next year,” Felix explains. “Like, I'm happy for them but Sung's ditching me? What happened to the bro code? But, anyway,” he laughs. “There'll be an empty bedroom. You should totally take it!”

You blink at him, brain short-circuiting for a second. "You— you’re serious?"

"Yeah," he says casually, like he didn’t just propose something so life-altering. "It’ll be like a sleepover every night!” he exclaims, grinning widely.

You can’t help the way your heart thuds a little faster in your chest, a fluttery feeling in your stomach. Living together? With Felix?

The idea is tempting. Like, incredibly so. Your own place is small, the communal kitchen area is… horrific, and your roommate tends to ignore your existence. It's a bit less than ideal.

But… you know there's a big risk of things becoming very awkward very quickly. It sounds like a dream, and at the same time, it’s a recipe for disaster. Spending that much time together could either bring you closer or push you apart. And with your recent… weirdness.. about him… you’re not sure which one is worse.

You must be silent for too long because Felix glances at you and looks a little unsure, like he suddenly regrets saying it. “I mean— you don’t have to, of course! It was just an idea. I’m sure you’re comfortable in your place and all. I didn’t mean to, like, push that on you—”

You cut him off before he can go too far. “No! No, it’s—” you shake your head, trying to choose your words carefully. “I… I'll think about it.”

He looks surprised, like he wasn't expecting that response. He lets out a breath, relief and a tentative excitement evident on his face.

“Okay,” he says softly, the corners of his mouth twitching a bit like he’s trying to keep himself from breaking into a big smile. “Uh, yeah, of course. No pressure,” he continues. “But, y'know, I'd be way happier to have you than some random new person. You practically live here already anyway. I think it'd be fun.”

Or it could ruin everything. But when Felix smiles at you, a hopeful look in his eyes… you can't bring yourself to shut down the idea completely.

“Yeah. It might be fun,” you say, trying to keep your tone neutral.

He grins, and a wave of excitement suddenly washes back over him. "We can bake all the time, and play games, and watch movies— Oh my god, it would be so fucking awesome.”

You laugh at the sparkle in his eyes. "Yeah, okay," you tap his head with a mixing spoon. “Shut up and grab the sugar. Let's not get ahead of ourselves.”

“Yessir.”

—

You end up splitting the cookie dough and making half with normal chocolate chips and half with the ugly white sugar chips. They turned out better than they had any right to be, considering you and Felix goofed off a bit too much while making them. (Even the white chocolate ones are pretty good). The two of you munch on them as you return to studying. Felix doesn't argue, content having taken a long break and sugar in his system.

You work in comfortable silence, listening to the soft pitter patter of rain until the sun starts to set. With a yawn, you shut your laptop in front of you.

"I think I'm done for today," you say, standing up and stretching.

Felix glances up from his spot on the floor, chin in his hand, surrounded by a mess of books and papers. "Really?"

"Yeah. How about you?"

He sighs, leaning back and stretching. "I still have so much left to go through," he complains, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"That's your own fault for playing games all week instead of studying," you laugh softly.

He pouts at you. "I know, I know." Then he groans and falls backwards on the floor, throwing his arms over his face. "Man, I'm tired. I'm done too."

You giggle at the sight of him splayed out on the floor. “Alright, cool. I should be heading out anyway,” you say, starting to gather your things. Then, as if on cue, a loud rumble of thunder echoes outside.

Oh shit. You both glance at each other, then towards the window, where the rain you thought would have passed by now is quickly developing into a full-on storm. Great. The universe must be out to get you.

Felix gets up from the floor and walks to the window. "Damn, can you even go home in this? It looks pretty bad out there.”

You join him at the window and peer outside. The rain is coming down harder, droplets hitting against the windowpane incessantly. You grimace. Well, it's not that bad, but it still isn't something you'd like to walk through.

Oh well. You sigh. “It's.. it's alright. Could I borrow an umbrella?”

He doesn’t answer right away, continuing to peer out the window. A frown spreads across his face before he speaks. “Of course, but… are you sure? You can stay the night if you want.”

“Uh—”

Well… normally, you wouldn't mind. You've slept over tons of times before. But this time feels different, and suddenly the thought of staying is a bit nerve-wracking.

"A little rain won't kill me,” you settle on saying.

Felix glances back at you, eyebrows furrowing in concern. He looks like he's about to say something, but another crash of thunder interrupts him.

He frowns and crosses his arms, leaning against the frame of the window. It's undeniably attractive. “A little rain? I can't let you walk home in this, are you crazy? It's dangerous.”

“But—” you start to protest.

"Nope,” he cuts in. “You’re not risking it. It's getting dark too,” he points out. He looks outside, then back at your face, sighing. His face softens. “...Okay. If you really want to go, at least let me walk you.”

“You don't have to walk me, Felix.”

“Yeah, I kinda do. Who knows what could happen to you? You could get struck by lightning! Or…” He gives you a once over. “You could, like, slip and bleed out in a puddle or something. Or die of hypothermia or some fucking thing. I don't know!” He throws his hands up.

You let out a breathless laugh. You don’t want to argue with him, but staying the night is definitely making you anxious to think about. You don't want to trouble him with walking back and forth in that weather either, but Felix seems stubborn on the matter. What's worse, the look on his face has you worrying he might think you're trying to get away from him or something.

(Which isn't… wrong. But Felix would misunderstand. It's not because you don't like him. It's…)

You exhale, looking outside one more time. With the rain getting worse by the minute, staying the night seems like the only reasonable choice.

Felix taps his foot impatiently, observing the growing storm. “So?”

“Okay, fine. I'll stay… You're right, it's getting pretty bad out there," you concede.

He opens his mouth but then quickly shuts it again, suddenly looking a bit unsure. He studies your face and you almost want to hide at how intently he's staring. Why, why is he staring like that? Like he can see right through you. Didn't you just say what he wanted? Did he change his mind about letting you stay?

But, the moment passes before you can do anything and he looks away. "Thank god,” he huffs. “I was really fighting off the mental images of your dead body in a ditch.”

You scoff. “I'm not that weak.”

“I know,” he says with a soft smile. Then he smirks, glancing back at you. "You're not weak. Just clumsy.”

You shove him in response and he laughs, the smirk on his face turning into a grin. The tension from earlier dissolves a bit and you can finally breathe again; the air starts to feel less awkward, comfortable.

“So,” he says, standing up straight. "Since you're staying, want some clothes to change into? I don’t think you wanna sleep in jeans.”

He doesn't wait for an answer, already shuffling through his drawer and handing a plain black t-shirt and sweatpants over to you.

You take them gingerly, trying to ignore how your nerves suddenly spike again. "Thanks," you murmur, clutching the soft fabric in your hands.

Maybe he senses something because he keeps his distance, eyes roaming over your face once more, curiosity and something else in his gaze.

Then, he clears his throat. “You know the bathroom is all yours if you need,” he says, turning back to his mess of papers on the floor. “I'm gonna try to get a little more studying done. Maybe. I'm really fighting the urge to open League right now.”

"Felix," you raise your eyebrows at him with a laugh, "If I find you mid ranked match in twenty minutes, I'm pouring water on your computer."

He purses his lips. “You wouldn't.”

“Try me,” you taunt and make your way to the bathroom. You close the door behind you and let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

That was good. See? You can banter with him and everything like normal. There's nothing to be weird about. You can be normal about this.

You sigh. Yeah, right. This is so dumb. You’ve stayed over countless times before. You’ve worn his clothes before, shared a bed with him before. It's just Felix.

So why… Why is it so hard to be normal right now?

(You're not so stupid you don't know the answer to that. You're definitely in denial about… something, and you'll gladly stay that way for as long as you can help it. It's easier to not think about it.)

Your head hurts. God. Maybe a shower will clear your mind.

It does. You feel lighter and refreshed when you step out and you quickly change into the clothes Felix gave you; his scent envelopes you as you slip on the shirt and you instantly feel more at ease, comforted. You're good. Everything's cool.

When you step into Felix's bedroom, you find him exactly where you left him, leaning on a pile of pillows on the floor, hunched over a textbook. True to his word, he's trying to study again but he looks like he's seconds away from giving up.

"Hey,” you announce your entrance. “Successfully resisting the clutches of League?” you ask, giggling at the sight of him sprawled on the floor.

“Heyyy,” he drawls, not looking up from his book. “Proud of me? I'm actually studying. Not like I'll ever reach silver no matter how much I fucking—”

His words seem to die in his throat as he finally glances up and sees you standing in the doorway. His eyes widen instantly, scanning up and down your body, lips parted in shock.

"That's, um, um. That's—” he stutters, tongue tied all of a sudden.

You frown a bit at his reaction, feeling self-conscious. Is your hair too flat? Are the clothes not right? You adjust the falling neckline of the shirt before taking a seat on the floor, trying to ignore the way he's still staring.

You swear you see his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows and he quickly looks away as you sit next to him.

“...What?” you ask, trying not to assume the worst.

“You— uh, the,” he gestures to your outfit vaguely. “It fits, uh— better? Than it used to? Yeah. Looks nice.”

He sounds a bit strangled and now you're definitely convinced you look strange.

“Um, thanks…" you mutter, trying not to show how thrown off his reaction has you feeling. You toy with the hem of the soft material self-consciously. Obviously they don't fit properly, they’re Felix’s clothes after all. You’ve borrowed them before, why is he suddenly being so weird?

Felix fidgets with the corner of his textbook, avoiding eye contact as if the words on the pages are suddenly the most interesting thing he’s ever read.

He clears his throat. “Uh, yeah, anyway. I'm pretty much done. Was just waiting for you.” He closes the book and finally lifts his eyes to meet your gaze and he has a strange, shy smile plastered on his face. You open your mouth to ask if he’s alright, but he starts speaking again, barely giving you a moment to get a word in.

“I— Dude, I'm like— I'm honestly gonna fail this class,” he groans, burying his face in his hands. “Like, I'm actually just not built for academia. I’m gonna drop out and then start working at the… fucking convenience store or something.” He lets out a long sigh. “Or, y'know, I'll start streaming. That seems pretty nice. I could be, like, a huge streamer guy. Tons of people will watch. I'll be famous. You could be my manager.”

You blink, trying to make sense of the sudden topic change.

“Uh, First of all,” you say, gently knocking his knee with your own, “You're smart as hell. You'll graduate just fine. Second, I highly doubt many people would suddenly start watching some nerd’s League streams.”

He whines and gives you a pouty look. “Why not?? I’m funny, I’d be great,” he protests, sitting up with a huff.

“Yeah, right. I’d be managing a streamer who can’t even get to gold rank. Embarrassing.”

He scoffs, acting offended. “Hey! I didn’t say I'd make League streams. I could be a variety streamer, y’know.”

“Oh yeah? So you can stream how fast you lose at every game?” you say, grinning at his sulky expression. You understand him, the way he teases you all the time. It's fun when you're not on the receiving end.

He places a hand over his chest, feigning offense. “Wow,” he deadpans. “Can’t believe you're attacking me like this in my time of despair.”

You grin a bit and roll your eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Stop being dramatic, you know I’m right. You need to get better if you want to start your streaming career.”

“Dude. I could get to gold if I wanted to. I just... choose not to. Bronze is a good rank, y’know. It’s like, the vibe.” The pout returns on his face. “Plus, my viewers wouldn’t care about that. They’ll be there for my personality.”

You arch a brow. “Your personality.”

“Yeah, my personality! Shut up. If League doesn't work, I could play like, Call of Duty, or… or like, Animal Crossing! Hey, I can't lose at Animal Crossing now, can I?”

“You might be onto something,” you muse.

“No…” he groans. “It’s never gonna happen. My dreams of becoming a famous streamer have to die because of… stupid calculus and… all these boring things.”

He drops his head on your shoulder, pouting at the thought of having to spend more time studying. You laugh and reach a hand up to pat his head, playing with his hair absentmindedly.

"It's not that bad. You'll get through this," you say, trying to console him. "But seriously,” you continue, “I can’t believe you play so much League but never got past bronze. What are you even doing?”

He whines and buries his face in the crook of your neck, mumbling something about “bad teammates”.

The contact is familiar and comforting. He gets clingy like this often, especially when he's tired. You can feel his warm breath against your skin, its steady rhythm sending tingles down your spine. His hair is soft under your fingertips. And you are so, so normal.

“Have you ever considered… that maybe you… are the bad teammate?” you can't help but tease.

“Heyyy,” he whines again, lifting his head to look at you with an offended expression.

You giggle at the sight of his disgruntled face and it seems to only make him sulk more, the pout on his face growing deeper. Cute.

“After all we've been through…” he breathes out. “After I’ve trusted you with my life. I can’t believe I’m hearing this from my own best friend… the absolute backstabbing…”

He's ridiculous. "You might wanna think of some new material, Mr. Variety Streamer,” you laugh. “The theatrics are getting a little old.”

He continues to pout, his gaze fixed on you. He’s so close, face just a few inches away from yours, and your heart jumps at the realization. Or maybe it jumps because of the way he’s looking at you; scrutinizing your face intently, his eyes flitting across your features like he’s trying to commit them to memory. You shift around nervously. Something's off about how he's looking at you. You thought you’d seen a flash of… well, you don’t know what it was. But it makes you feel…

Warm and fluttering in your stomach, but in the worst, most uncomfortable way. You hate the way your body reacts so vividly to literally nothing. You really, really hate it.

Luckily (or unfortunately?), a particularly loud rumble of thunder echoes outside and he jumps.

He instantly leans away, as if he just realized himself how close you were. “Sorry, I— Geez, this weather sucks,” he complains, glancing toward the window. The storm outside is still raging, rain pelting against the window mercilessly.

“Yeah,” you say dumbly, feeling cold now that Felix has pulled away.

You push down the thoughts of how badly you want him to lean on you again, or how you wish he could hold you like he usually does. It’s easier to ignore whatever you’re feeling while he’s busy being all silly and clingy.

This is stupid. It's just so… frustrating, and you have no idea what to make of any of the thoughts that are running through your mind.

There’s a pause as he continues watching the rain outside, eyes following the raindrops dancing down the window panes. You try to study his expression; it’s pensive, almost contemplative, much like the look in his eyes earlier.

“Are you tired?” he finally asks.

You blink. “Uh.” You realize that you are actually pretty tired. “Yeah, a little.”

The admission makes you yawn and Felix smiles in return, his expression softening.

He pushes himself off the floor and looks at you for a moment, like he's about to say something — and then he doesn’t. Instead, he offers a hand to help you off the ground.

“Come on,” he says, hand extended. “We should get to sleep before the electricity inevitably goes out.”

You let him pull you up and he lets go of your hand quickly as he motions for you to get on the bed.

“I’ll go and— um,” he stumbles over his words, taking a few steps back. “I'll go shower real quick and then we can, uh… sleep.”

He disappears before you can say anything and leaves you sitting on the edge of the bed, suddenly feeling more tense and awkward than earlier.

You release a long breath. Okay. Okay, everything's fine. Just the two of you, sleeping in the same bed. No big deal. That’s happened plenty of times before. You try to steady your breathing as you sit there on his bed, surrounded by his pillows, his blankets, his scent.

You run a hand through your hair and scroll through your phone, trying to distract yourself. It’s going to be a long night.

When the door opens ten minutes later, you look up. Felix's hair is damp and he's wearing a loose white t-shirt with sweatpants, the material hanging low on his hips. His skin is a little flushed from the shower. He looks so soft and effortlessly pretty, you kind of want to scream.

“Hey,” he whispers as he shuts the bedroom door behind him, “You good?”

You nod, throat suddenly dry.

He clears his throat and walks towards the bed, standing there quietly. He doesn’t look at you for a long minute and you start to wonder if he’s thinking the same things you are, or if you’re overthinking everything and he’s fine.

“Well, let’s head to sleep then.” He breaks his gaze from the floor and turns to look at you again, a hint of worry on his face. “Uh, you can take the bed tonight, alright? I’ll just sleep on the floor or something.”

“What— Why?” you exclaim.

“I—” he blinks, taken aback, as if he didn't expect you to ask that. “I don't know? If, I mean, if you... like…” he trails off, looking away again. “The floor doesn't look that bad.”

It does. The cold, worn floor does look that bad. You must look worse. You're not an idiot, you can read in between the lines. He's uncomfortable sleeping next to you.

There’s no other reason for him to not want to sleep in the same bed as you. You've shared this bed with him countless times before. If he's not comfortable with you now…

Your mind is racing. Even if your awkwardness is because of your unbidden… lunacy towards him… he explicitly told you he doesn't see you like that. As much as you've been trying to repress everything and act normal like he's been… it hasn't worked. This is decidedly not normal.

There's a tense silence as you try to figure out what to say. The knot in your stomach tightens with every passing second and you try to push down the hurt that’s threatening to surface. You're making him uncomfortable. If you could just be normal about all this— Fuck. It's all your fault.

"Shut up," you finally manage to mutter, starting to shuffle off the bed. “It's your bed. I'll take the floor."

“What— No, hey, stop—” he protests quickly, stepping forward to grab your arm. “Don’t— I couldn't let you do that. It's not— no.” he sputters.

You meet his eyes in confusion. He still has a grip on you, fingers warm and soft against your skin.

“You’re not sleeping on the floor,” he says firmly, voice a bit lower than usual. “That's stupid. I just thought, maybe…” his grip on your arm tightens the tiniest bit.

“...What?” you ask quietly.

He shakes his head, releasing your arm with a sigh.

You look at him, really look at him, the way his eyes won't meet yours, shoulders slumped, fingers tapping his thigh nervously. “Just,” you sigh. “You said it's stupid if I sleep there. Same for you. Just come here.”

He looks at you once more, searching your face. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah,” you nod, hopefully sounding more confident than you feel.

Your heart is pounding. You’re trying your best to ignore the tension in the room and act like everything’s fine. Like spending the night sleeping with your best friend when he clearly doesn’t want you to be close to him anymore isn’t breaking your heart.

You give him a tight-lipped smile as you finally get under the blankets and lay on your side with your back towards him.

Felix hesitantly climbs into bed next to you, keeping a fair distance. He doesn’t say anything at first. You think he’s just going to sleep and you’re both going to ignore whatever that was about. Cool, you can do that. You're great at doing that. Then, he huffs.

"I’m so fucking tired," he mumbles as he shifts beside you and you hum in agreement.

“Yeah, now imagine sleeping on the floor.”

“Yeah,” he murmurs. “Thank you. Um… sorry for being weird.”

You don't know what to say to that. “...You’re always weird,” you manage quietly.

He lets out a low chuckle and you feel some of the tension leave your body. It’s a familiar banter, one you’ve done with him for ages, so you grasp onto it, desperate for any semblance of normalcy.

“I’m sorry, though,” he says seriously. “I’m kind of an idiot, you know.”

“...Yeah, I know.”

“I— wow,” he laughs softly. “Chat, what did I do to deserve this?”

You mirror his laugh and turn on your back to face him.

His hair has gotten longer. The messy locks are fanned around his head on the pillow. His eyes are wide underneath his bangs, studying your face with an expression you can’t quite pin down.

He’s so pretty. You wonder how you ever thought you could act normal after everything that's happened.

“Is the chat in the room with us?” you ask around a smirk, and pray your voice doesn't sound too breathless.

He snorts and you swear you can almost see the pout on his face. Yeah, he’s fine. He’s back to his regular self. You should be, too.

“Shut up,” he pokes your shoulder weakly.

Your heart does something stupid in your chest at the contact and you press your face further into the pillow to hide the flush that’s undoubtedly on your face right now.

A few moments pass in silence and you close your eyes, hoping sleep will come soon and end this mess of a night. You don’t know how much time passes. Felix is silent and you feel yourself drifting off, sleep tugging at your consciousness, when you hear him whispering in the dark.

“Hey,” he says your name quietly. “You awake?”

You hum in response and reluctantly blink your eyes open. His face swims into view and you realize he's closer than before. Now only a few inches separate you from him.

“Sorry… um, I'm cold. Can… can I...?” He hesitates, leaving the question unfinished as his eyes search your face.

His breath ghosts your cheek and you freeze, trying to keep your breathing even as your body stiffens.

“Yeah,” you murmur, trying to sound nonchalant. “Yeah, of course.”

A flash of relief fills his face before he moves even closer to you. He lays next to you, resting his head on your collarbone and draping one arm over your waist carefully. You hold your breath.

“Is this alright?” he mumbles.

You’re not sure if you can speak without sounding like a goddamn idiot, so you just nod in reply.

He buries his head in the crook of your neck and you have to remind yourself that it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just Felix being Felix: the most physically clingy person on Earth. Also your best friend who you definitely do not have untoward feelings for.

That would be really, really bad.

Especially in a situation like this, where Felix’s nose is pressed in your neck, and his arm is around your waist, his leg tangled with yours at some point and his hair is tickling your chin. He’s everywhere. It's entirely overwhelming.

And he's so warm. You didn't even realize you were cold until he pressed against you. Warmth seeps deep into your bones as he sighs and pulls your body further against his. It's cozy and familiar and you try to focus on the comfort of the action instead of the way your heart is hammering in your chest.

It’s quiet for a few moments as he settles against you and you try to relax, waiting for the rise and fall of his chest to even out beside you, signaling he’s fallen asleep.

Instead, he shifts and you feel his lips brush against your neck, his breath fanning over your skin. Oh.

“Hey,” he murmurs in that low, low voice of his that only really comes out when he's sleepy. “Hey, I… um.”

You can feel the vibrations from his voice against your neck as he speaks. Oh. You’ve definitely thought about this in a much different context before.

He’s silent for a moment as if collecting his thoughts. But he just sighs, pulling his head away slightly. “Nevermind… Um, good night.”

“Night,” you manage weakly.

It’s silent again. The only sounds that fill the room are the incessant beating of raindrops against the windows and Felix's soft breathing by your ear, drowning out the occasional faint rumble of thunder.

—

You wake to the sound of groaning.

Unsticking your eyelids, you attempt to get a look at your surroundings. It’s still dark, but the room slowly comes into focus as you blink slowly, trying to discern what woke you up.

The first thing you notice is that it's warm. Hot, even. The air is thick and heavy in your lungs and there's a warm weight pressed against you.

It takes a few moments before you become aware of your current predicament — Right, you're at Felix's place, sleeping in his bed. His body is completely pressed against yours, his chest to your back, his head nuzzled in the nook of your neck. You’re practically spooning. There’s a leg thrown over yours and an arm wrapped snugly around your middle, making it virtually impossible to move.

And — it's not that unusual. It's not far off from the position you fell asleep in and Felix's clinginess is really quite endearing, even if your fragile heart can't handle it anymore. No, what's unusual are the sounds coming from him.

He’s making small noises as he fidgets against you, like he's in pain. He's probably having a bad dream. You start to turn over in order to wake him up, but his grip on you tightens and his breath hitches and—

You freeze.

That was definitely not the sound of someone having a nightmare.

It was more like… like… Quiet, soft, and breathless; little sounds caught in his throat that spill into your ear.

And if that wasn’t bad enough, his body is moving — restless, shifting against you. His hips moving minutely. It takes your sleepy mind a second to put it all together.

Holy… Holy shit. Is he…?

You're suddenly very awake, fogginess replaced by a white hot rush of panic and disbelief.

He’s— Oh no.

Felix is asleep. He's definitely sleeping but— He must be… having some sort of… dream and… What the fuck are you supposed to do? Wake him up? Absolutely not. You literally— You'd rather die than face him like this. Not to mention how mortifying it would be for both of you. You would actually rather choose death.

He twitches slightly, his hips pushing up against your body. A low groan leaves him as he pulls you closer, completely against his body now, the thin material of his clothes doing nothing to hide his—

You squeeze your eyes shut. Oh my god you are going to die right now. You're seriously going to pass away for real this time. This— this is—

“Mmmn…” he moans, low and needy and right by your ear and wow, that’s… wow.

You have to be dreaming… this is just some very fucked up dream, the sane part of you implores. The rest of you is ignited in flames.

It's not a dream.

Another little sound slips out and he presses even closer to you, his body flush against yours, like he’s trying to get as much contact as possible. His hips move against yours with a subtle roll and you feel shameful sparks of heat pooling in your gut.

This is so bad. This is so, so bad, fuck. Fuck.

He’s grinding against you in tiny movements, little gasps and moans escaping out of his mouth every few seconds and your entire body is burning. His arm is tight around your waist, his whole body pressed flush against your back. You don’t even dare to breathe as he rocks his hips forward ever so slightly, his nose nuzzling your neck as he lets out a soft whine. It takes everything you have to keep your own whimper at bay, suddenly desperate to grind back against him but— Christ. Are you insane?

You’re frozen. You’re not supposed to be here, you’re not supposed to be feeling this, you really should wake him up, this is so wrong, yet you’re still frozen like an idiot. You can't think. Your brain is made of cherry slushy. The heat death of the universe is imminent.

Your mind is completely blank but your body is overstimulated and you’re just trying your best to figure out how not to die in this situation. Not easy when Felix is moaning into your neck and it sounds so good and he’s shifting and his body is impossibly warm and he’s—

His breath stutters abruptly in the midst of a long moan and he goes completely still around you. All you hear is heavy breathing for a few moments.

Shit, shit, shit. Is he awake? You're caught between relief and something like disappointment but aren't left enough time to dwell on that thought before you hear a shaky whispered, “F-Fuck.”

You hold your breath.

Your heartbeat is ringing in your ears, body buzzing with tension, but you do your best to stay completely still. The air is so thick. You almost can’t believe what just happened, but the evidence is pressing into your back as Felix lets out another quiet swear.

His grip on you tenses for a moment before releasing you entirely. He untangles himself from you and pulls his body away from yours so suddenly that you nearly think you hallucinated the whole thing.

His breathing is ragged and you don’t dare move a muscle. You keep your back resolutely facing him, try to relax, and you are asleep. You are asleep. You are asleep. You repeat it like a mantra.

You don’t know if he believes your act, your eyes pressed shut, as you try to keep your breaths even and slow.

The sheets rustle a bit. You stay motionless, heart pounding in your ears. He’s sitting up now, you can feel the weight shifting beside you. It’s completely silent for a few seconds before he whispers your name in question.

You are asleep. You are asleep. You are asleep. You pray he believes it.

“...Thank god,” he breathes. You hear more rustling, sheets moving, and he's getting up.

Only when you hear the door shut do you allow yourself to breathe, wondering how the hell you made it out of that situation alive. What the fuck.

Like, what the fuck.

You stare at the wall in shock, eyes wide and heart hammering hard in your chest.

He doesn’t know you were awake. You’re alive. You survived.

You bury your face in the pillow and try to collect yourself, shaking slightly in the aftermath of whatever the hell just happened. The heat of his body is still surrounding you, his presence lingering on your skin and you can’t help the traitorous part of your brain that wishes for him to crawl back into the bed and hold you again. That wishes you were brave enough to do something other than lie there.

You push the thought away with a quiet groan. You can’t think about that. You can’t. You're barely holding onto the last threads of your sanity as it is.

But you can’t fall back asleep.

Of course you can’t. After what just happened, your brain will probably never be fully operational again. You press your hands to your face and let out a pathetic whine, wondering if it's possible to die of embarrassment. You're sure this is what a heart attack feels like. It's a wonder you're still breathing.

This is so much worse than last time, when you got too into practicing. At least that was mutually agreed on and Felix made light of it pretty easily. But this? How are you supposed to act normal after this? That wasn't supposed to happen. You weren't supposed to know what it feels like to have his body up against yours, to hear him moaning in your ear. And you pretended to be asleep instead of stopping him. So he doesn't even know… It's so wrong on so many levels.

You sigh. Felix doesn't know you were awake, so he doesn't know you know and maybe, maybe you can get away with pretending it didn't happen. You'll have to play it cool, of course. Or even better, you can forget about this entirely, convince yourself it was all a fever dream.

Maybe.

—

a/n: AHHH. so it really wasnt meant to be a cliffhanger here lol but then i ended up splitting it so... sorry. the next (and final for REALL THIS TIME) part will be out very soon! nothing like the 3 month long wait for this (ty SO MUCH for ur patience) andd yeah! i hope this is at least somewhat living up to expectations so far, tysm for reading!!

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jade-jini · 3 months ago

Text

“You thought so, huh?”

Aespa Giselle x Reader

Prompt: If yo thought Uchinaga Aeri was just another nerd you could torment, you thought wrong. Part 2

Genre: Smut (enemies with benefits ig)

TW: mentions of bullying but like meh. They’re mean to each other but they into it lol. Also apparently this is almost 8k words and it’s mostly plot sorry-

Being the new girl in school was never easy for nobody, even for those who gave no fucks like Aeri. New schedules. New professors with new mannerisms to learn how to deal with. New classmates (even though Aeri considered that most people were the same cliche). New scenery (this wasn’t so bad tho, the campus had a lot of nice green areas).

But besides all that, new bullies. Fuck.

Since a young age due to her good grades, her lack of interest for much exaggerated human interaction, and her glasses (like it was her Fuckin fault she was a bit blind, old school bullies fr), she had been the target of multiple brain-dead good-for-nothings. Bored, mean, spoiled brats from rich families, or psychos from low life who lacked so much in so many aspects that they live their day by day with a deep frustration. What they all had in common is that they never learned no limits and respect for others, specially for people like Aeri: So calm, quiet, and permissive of this behavior towards them.

That was, of course, until she reached her teenage years.

As puberty hit both physically and mentally, Aeri learned very fast to stand up for herself and not take nobody’s bullshit. A mean comment? Either give a good comeback that would humiliate them or completely ignore them like they mean less than the floor she was walking on, depending on what she knew would sting the bully the most. She learned to quietly study these people. People who, in some occasions even, went from her bullies to her victims.

You see, on the rare occasion that one of her bullies decided they actually fuck with her attitude and willingness to stand up for herself, there were people who even decided to teach her a bit of physical fighting. There was this specific time that one of her “ex bullies” saw her responding back to some bitchass, and when she did, girlie was not having any of it. At the time Aeri was actually on a physical advantage, but without knowing how to fight, girlie was beating her ass fr. And she tried to fight back, every time! But she failed lol. So, tired of the second hand embarrassment, they taught her a lesson or two (like actually).

Back to present time now. A new environment can always look intimidating to anybody, but to Aeri? Nah she gave not enough fucks. And thankfully, not a lot of people even noticed a new student was around.

Oh but you? You noticed her. Right away. You were sitting with your little group of girlies at lunch as per usual, talking about literally any silly rich girl shit you could think of, when you decided that you was BORED. And what do rich kids do when they’re bored? They’re assholes. As you scan around the room to see if you could catch one of your frequent victims, your eyes fell on a new face. You were taken aback by Aeri, not only by the fact that you were sure 100% you didn’t know her. But also by the fact that your chest was beating so fast out of an excitement you had yet to understand. You scanned her face, her whole figure. Her hair perfectly brushed, her big glasses, her almost completely clean of makeup skin, her black sweater covering half of her hands as she grabbed her backpack’s strap.

What. A. Loser. You thought.

But what a peculiar one. She didn’t look nervous, she didn’t look like she felt out of place, she looked like a nerd if you followed the rules but.. she also didn’t? You licked your lips and turned around to interrupt the conversation your friends were having, knowing that it probably wasn’t even as half as important as what you had to say.

“Guys, who is that?” You said, your eyes stuck to the new girl.

“Who?” Wonyoung asked you, making an o with her mouth as she looked around the big cafeteria. You pointed at the Japanese girl in line, waiting to get her food “Hm? Who’s that?”

“That’s what I’m asking, Wonyoung” you told her, doing emphasis on her name.

“Ohhh” you heard the taller girl say, followed by her giggles, making your eyes roll at your.. slow friend, to say it in a kind way. “I don’t know, I’ve never seen her before.”

“She’s kinda cute though” Ryujin admitted as she nodded to herself.

“Yeah, and clearly a total loser” you huffed.

“We just got here, how come you already detected a new nerd??” Yujin asked her friend, shock showing in her face.

“I don’t know, I guess it’s like a superpower” you said, shrugging.

“Yeah guys, y/n has a 5th sense for things like that” Yujin said, softly pushing the mentioned girl’s shoulder.

“What do you mean, we all have 5 senses” Wonyoung told her girlfriend like it was the most obvious thing in the world (which it was girl hello what’s wrong with Yujin)

“Oh not me, I’m not that smart”

“Yeah we can tell, Yujin…” Ryu murmured under her breath “but yeah, it’s crazy how y/n can find losers so fast in a crowded room”

“So, what y/n has is like, the gaydar but for nerds maybe?” Wony asked looking at nothing, and you could see her trying hard to understand exactly.

“Nooo, the gaydar works when you’re also gay”

“But y/n IS gay”

“But she’s NOT a nerd or a loser, Wonyoung”

“But she’s gay.”

“Ok but that’s not the point Wonyoung!”

“I’m just trying to make sure I’m up to date with everybody’s information!” The girlie exclaimed, pouting and crossing her arms in front of her body. Everybody sighed, and her girlfriend simply side hugged her by the waist and kissed her cheek to make her relax, which of course worked, causing a cute little smile to spread on wony’s face.

“Ew” you frowned at the cheesy interaction, staring at the couple as they were clearly in their own little bubble now.

“Right?” Ryujin said, her face mirroring y/n’s frown “Us when though?”

“What?”

“What??”

“So, what do you think about the school so far, cousin?” Rei asked Aeri as they walked down the hallway. “I know it’s a bigger campus so I hope you’re adapting well so far”

“Don’t worry about me, rei. I’m ok” Aeri answered without looking at Rei, until she realized the young girl wasn’t following her anymore. She turned around confused to look at her cousin “Whatsup? Cmon I need to get to class baby”

“I know I haven’t mentioned it but, I think it’s important that you know there’s some rich kids around here, and they can be a bit… mean, specially with new people…” the girl commented, clearly looking uncomfortable having to share this information. Aeri could tell the girl has at least been a witness of whatever behavior these assholes had.

“We both know I have experience with that and that I know how to look after myself, I’ll be ok kid, don’t worry really” the older girl said in a calm voice, patting her younger cousin’s head in an attempt to comfort and reassure her that everything will be ok. “And remember, if anybody bothers you…”

“I know I know, you’ll break their bones” Rei giggled and held onto her cousin’s arm as they keep walking. Aeri wasn’t yet familiar with where all her classes were, so as a good cousin, Rei would walk her until she felt more familiar with the whole place. Thankfully she made it a few minutes earlier to class, also giving her cousin enough time to get to her own room.

As they got inside the classroom, Aeri noticed how her eyes would go to a specific row of seats, her body language letting her know that the girls sitting there would make her feel uneasy. She didn’t need to hear anything else to know why her cousin felt the need to warn her earlier.

And surprise! guess who was there? Yup. Your ass, sitting just two seats behind Aeri. It wasn’t her first time in that class, but you had missed the past two lessons so you didn’t know she was there too.

“Look who we have here…” you murmured to yourself, as you saw your new classmate entering the room with another girl that you recognized as some sophomore from a different department that you’d mess with from time to time. They seemed close, so you quickly wonder if something was going on there.

“What?” Wonyoung asked you, since your voice was too quiet for her to know what you had said.

“Nothing nothing” you dismiss her with your hand, making the girl shrug it off and go back to her nails.

“See you later, cousin. Text me when you’re done.” You heard the younger girl said to your classmate, who only nodded and patted the girl’s head before letting her go.

“Cousin, huh? Interesting” you whispered to yourself again.

“Schizophrenia…” Wonyoung whispered as well, in a little singing voice, looking at you with concern.

As class passes by, you somehow managed to switch seats with the classmate that was behind Aeri. Not like you gave him much option though, after threatening to burn his hair with your lighter.

You didn’t know why, if it was out of boredom or something else. You just couldn’t wait for the chance to mess with the new girl. I mean, it’s been what? At least more than one day since she got there right? And you STILL haven’t introduced yourself?! Unforgivable. You knew how to start, your childish ass was gonna tease her a bit, and if she said something or reacted in any way, you’ll let her know her fuckin place. You learned her name: Uchinaga Aeri. And you confirmed she didn’t only look like one but she was, in fact, a nerd. This after seeing the advanced books in her bag, the cornily organized notes she took, and how she had a more than perfect answer to any exercise the teacher would ask. It was almost disgusting how smart she was.

“Teacher’s pet…” you murmured not to subtly. This earned you a hard look from the professor (which you responded with a fake pout), and Aeri looking at you and rolling her eyes, now recalling what her cousin mentioned earlier. She just had a tiny hope she wouldn’t encounter no asshole in a class she actually enjoyed.

Knowing she somehow had acknowledged your presence made you excited in someway. Next step? … well you didn’t know, probably something basic like throwing pens at her. And so you did. For 5 minutes. The first two times she just looked at you, silently warning you. This was just too funny for you tho, what was she gonna do? So you continued. By the time the rainbow was outta whosever bag of pens that was, she turned around completely and looked at you.

“Do that one more time and I’ll make sure you deepthroat that entire bag of pens, ok?” The girl in front of you said, such a calm but firm tone that caught you so off guard at first, second, and third. The fact that Aeri was fearless about threatening you like that left not only you but the classmates that heard it (including Wonyoung) speechless. The latter gulped, she had never heard nobody talking back to her friend like that since they were in kindergarten. And the kid who did it ended up expelled from school. To this day nobody knows what happened to him-

“Alright ladies, let’s avoid trouble please, class is almost over cmon. Uchinaga, y/l/n, focus on the board.” The teacher said, trying to de-escalate the situation.

One silent cold stare before fixing her posture was everything Aeri gave you for the rest of the class.

“Hey! those were MY scented rainbow markets!” a guy said.

“The only ones with fruity smell here are you and your boyfriend, Mark. Shut the fuck up.”

“Hey, asshole. Give me my notebook back.” You heard a voice behind you say, as you turned around and saw Aeri, you scanned the empty hallway, wondering who tf she was talking to ‘cause it couldn’t be you, even though you knew damn right it was. You had taken her notebook from her bag as revenge for talking shit. You had planned on blackmailing her with it, however the fact that she straight up insulted you was the only thing catching your attention at the moment.

“Excuse me?” You started, throwing her notebook to the floor, you were ready to pick it up again and slap her with it tho “Who the fuck do you think you-“ and got interrupted by Aeri’s hands on your shoulders.

“No.” Aeri said, pushing you against the lockers a bit too hard, making you groan and causing your bag to fall off your shoulder “who the fuck do YOU think you are?” She asked, looking intensely into your eyes. That’s when you realize she was taller than you. There was barely any difference, but you felt so small now. Her closeness and stare making you shiver. Were you scared? Of a nerd?! No way. But what type of nerd was this tho?! Girlie was intimidating as fuck. “Don’t make me say it again, girl. Don’t fuck with me.”

A silence appeared filling the air, you were impatiently waiting for something to happen, worried about Aeri’s next move. Only thing she did was to pretend she was gonna hit your face with her fist, making you flick, which caused her to giggle “it’s like seeing a pathetic scared puppy. What a case” and just like that, she got her notebook from the floor and started to calmly put it inside her bag.

You didn’t know why you couldn’t move, but it felt like you were waiting for her to give you permission. Once you realized this, you slapped yourself mentally, ready to leave this stupid and surreal situation. That was until she grabbed you by the shirt and slammed you against the wall one more time, not even looking at you.

“You don’t move until I say so”

“What the fuck Uchinaga, let me-“

“You don’t move until I say so.” she repeated grabbing on to your shirt so tightly that the friction was burning your neck “got it?”

And you couldn’t do nothing but gulp and nod.

The following days were a rollercoaster for you. The new girl that you assumed too soon was going to be just another victim turned out to become some sort of rival? A rival who had advantages both physically and mentally. She had better comebacks. Better insults that would leave your mind blank. Fuck, she even hits harder. You see, Aeri had found a lot of fun and pleasure on catching you off guard by slapping your head, making you drop your books, or pushing you with her shoulder when she was walking by. Sometimes you’d tell her off, reciprocate her bitchy attitude. Sometimes you would just let it be. Your friends were shocked at first, but then just processed it as some rivalry, because Aeri became sort of popular around for her strong attitude. You started to experiment a bunch of new things with all this situation.

But the weirdest one was probably how much this turned you on.

Aeri was mean to you. Most of the time she wouldn’t even wait for you to provoke her, she’d just straight up feel like messing with you. She was meaner to you than you were to her, ‘cause now you’d barely start it. Now it was you responding to her shit. You were confused, lowkey scared sometimes. And horny. It didn’t help that she seemed to have a big love for tops that were tight on the chest zone, making her chest stand up. A lot. You would fantasize about her so much, even when she was hurting you, daydreaming about these mean encounters ending in something else.

Honestly, even Aeri was confused as to why she enjoyed messing with you. Maybe it was for some kind of general revenge? She was a nerd but she had the balls to stand up for herself, which others didn’t have. And you were just some asshole, so, deserved? She thought so.

So on another casual day, you were walking to meet your friends at the parking lot, when Aeri once again caught you off guard, pushing you inside a bathroom (conveniently empty for the plot).

“Hey loser” she said, as she harshly pushed you against the wall like she’d always do.

“You know, it’s quite weird how you” you pointed at her “are the one calling me that. I never even got the chance to call you that to begin with.”

“That’s because you decided to be lame and call me just ‘Uchinaga’. So basic”

“Don’t you also call me by my last name sometimes?” You reminded her, as to which she just rolled her eyes. You smiled, one point to you.

“Whatever. I’ll make this short, you and your assholes friends better stop bothering my cousin. ” You looked at her confused. You remembered her cousin Rei, but you haven’t seen her (or probably yes but didn’t pay attention) in a while, all your attention had been on Aeri. You didn’t even bother your other victims much these days.

“What do you mean? I haven’t even seen Rei in forever.” You clarified, not wanting to be accused of shit you didn’t even do.

“That jock friend of yours keeps teasing her during her cheerleading practices. Make it stop or else.” Now you understood. Yujin. Fuck.

“I think you’re confused, Yujin has a girlfriend. And that’s Wonyoung.” You told her, mentioning your well known best friend, who was the captain of the cheerleaders (what a cliche huh? Jock x cheerleader)

“Like that would stop her, please.” Aeri said with a tone full of sarcasm.

You knew that even though Yujin was technically with Wonyoung, girlie was a playgirl and while she wouldn’t (or hasn’t so far) cheat on your friend, you wouldn’t be surprised if she was going around flirting with girls just for the ego boost. And ‘cause she doesn’t know how to think with the head on her shoulders rather than the one in her pants. However, she was a grownup, what the heck was Aeri expecting you to do?

“Well even if it didn’t, I’m not the boss of her, what do you want from me?”

“I don’t know, and I don’t care. Make sure she keeps it in her pants, or I’ll cut *it* off.” She said, remarking the word. “Plus don’t play with me, your friends or fans or whatever they are, they listen to you. And you know it.”

“Well, even if they did, why would I do you that solid? What’s in it for me?” You teased.

“How about we start with me not breaking your nose, hm?” She said in a hypocrite sweet tone.

“Aw man why you gotta be so aggressive?” You pouted. But on the inside that made you a bit scared, knowing she probably wouldn’t contain herself from doing so if she really wanted to.

“Because you’re completely annoying!” She almost yelled “I’m not giving you no options here, bitch. You either do it or I swear I’ll make you choke on your friend’s-“

In her rambling, Aeri failed to notice how you were completely deaf and basically drooling looking at her chest. Her cleavage showing, her breasts looked like they were about to escape from her blouse. You were wondering how did they let her in with that. For a short moment, you even fantasized about being physically similar to Yujin, so maybe you could get this girl pregnant and maybe you could get a taste of her milk as you sucked on her tits.

“Hey. Hey do you hear me?” Aeri snapped her fingers in front of your face. You blinked a couple times until your vision went back to normal “what the heck, y/n, don’t be a perv??” You felt her hand slapping your forehead.

“What?! What did I do??” You asked her, swearing there was no way she noticed you staring even tho you almost drooled ON her.

“Oh my god, is that what you want in exchange of calming your stupid friend down?” Aeri accused, but she couldn’t deny to herself that seeing your blank face as you lost yourself in your daydreaming about her caused things on her. A little smile was in the corner of her lips, and you didn’t know if you should be scared or excited.

“You wish, I could get way better without having to move a finger, Uchinaga. Don’t flatter yourself too much.” You said, trying to act as nonchalant as possible after the girl literally caught you looking at her tits lmao however, Aeri had an idea. An idea that would make you (or maybe not, eventually) regret being so obvious.

“Hm, so, you’re not interested in any of this?” The Japanese girl slowly asked whispering in such a sensual low voice, pulling the neckline of the shirt a bit to expose more of her skin. Your eyes betrayed you, your brain did so too, as you quietly redirected your focus to her chest. “You wouldn’t like to know how they look when they’re completely out? How they feel? Or… taste?”

“Fuck…” you sighed. The view, the sudden high temperature in the room, the closeness of your bodies, it was messing with your brain so much that you had to close your legs tight, and that’s when you both noticed Aeri’s leg in between yours. The accidental friction made you slightly moan and you swore you were done dying of embarrassment. The girl in front of you found this reaction very interesting, and decided to move her leg, stimulating your sensitive zones. More soft moans involuntarily escaped your mouth.

“Does that feel good?” She whispered in your ear.

“Y-yes… fuck..” you said with a string of voice as you closed your eyes. This was so funny for Aeri, this gave her so many new ideas that she’d put into practice. Not now though, but later.

“you’re such a horny loser” Aeri laughed, creating some distance between you two and fixing her clothes “I’ll let you go before you force yourself on me or something, weirdo. Control your friend. Or is ‘Bye bye teeth’ and ‘Bye bye balls’ for her.” And just like that she left you there alone. Horny and alone.

Practicing how easily she could turn you on became a new habit for Aeri. Besides the other aggressive ones she already had. So apart from bothering you, she would now take you to the bathroom whenever she caught you off guard, tease the living hell outta you, and leave like nothing happened. The worst part is you knew you weren’t gonna get anything, yet you let her take you with her for literal nothing.

It frustrated you. So fucking much. How easy she could just do whatever she wanted, and how the rush that lasted only a few seconds felt worth it. The girl would tease you to such extremes, just to leave you like that. Angry, and horny. You needed to do something about it, and touching yourself thinking about her wasn’t enough anymore. It felt humiliating that she got you doing that. So of course, the only solution you found was going back to hooking up with random people from campus. From other rich kids with no brain, to even nerds who swore several times they hated you. You needed to do something. To prove something to yourself and scratch that need.

You were popular for your looks. Any and everybody would accept going out with you even when they knew it was just to be used as a one night stand. You knew this, and so you used that to your advantage. You didn’t want nothing with nobody, you just needed two things: the ego boost, and to relief the frustration Aeri caused. The thing was, however, that she kept popping up on your mind while you were having sex with other people. And that you made you more and more frustrated every time. It was like a need you couldn’t get rid of no matter how rough you fucked any other girl or guy. You knew you didn’t want nothing to do with her, you could barely stand her. But maybe it was the anger of how mean she was to you, the impotence for how little you could do about it. You wondered if this is how your victims felt about you. Minus the sexual tension of course… hopefully.

As you were walking one of your soon to be hookups to her class, sweet talking to her ear, you felt the familiar sensation of somebody slapping your head.

“The fuck?” You exclaimed, rubbing your head as you turn around and saw Aeri giggle as she put some stuff in her locker after her last class. You looked at her and sighed. You were particularly frustrated and angry that day; just earlier she caught you on an empty corner and to make it short, did the knee thing to you, until she had you biting your lip and closing your eyes… just for her to grab the cold water she had and spill it all over your head, leaving you shivering and soaking wet in more than one way. You told her off and even slammed her against the lockers before she left though, so she went to class with a bit of a headache. You had to lie to Wonyoung and tell her you got caught in the rain.

“But it wasn’t raining today.” The taller girl said, confused.

“Yes it was, but it was at the other side of the building. This campus is so big sometimes rain doesn’t reach every part of it, wony, you know this“ok gaslighter.

“Ohhh, yeah you’re right” she said, even though she didn’t know shit. But she’d always agree with her bestie. Nevertheless, she pulled a small clean towel she always had in her locker for cheerleading practice, and quietly helped you dry your hair, which you thanked with a soft smile.

Back to present time, Aeri was in front of you, playing dumb as she fixed her glasses on her locker mirror, and you looked at her like you wanted to kill her. Your not-so-soon to be hookup stopped playing uninterested and was now worried about how you were finding the girl in front of you a better subject of your attention than her.

“Um, y/n?” Chaeryeong called, fixing her glasses as well and holding her books close to her chest “we’re gonna be late to class”

“Just go without me, I’ll meet you there ok?” You told the brown hair girl nonchalantly, not even giving her a look back.

“A-are you sure? You know this teacher is-“

“Get lost, chaery. Please” you told her, doing your best not to sound so passive aggressive. The girl obeyed, and quickly disappeared from your side. She said bye but, you didn’t notice and didn’t care. You started walking to Aeri.

“Uchinaga, hey.” You called her when you noticed she was getting ready to leave too. “What the fuck was that for, huh?”

Aeri turned around and with her arms in front of her chest she simply answered “I just felt like it, why is it that so strange to you?”

What you didn’t know it’s that Aeri was having her own internal issues. Her own battles about how she felt about you. She couldn’t stand you, she knew that. And similar to previous victims, she enjoyed annoying you. But it was never as often and as heavy as she did it with you. And the part that worried her Foreal was, that she never, ever, had felt jealousy.

Oh yeah. Aeri was jealous.

Jealous of every boy and girl who looked at you. Of every person who got to be with you. It started with her wondering “what the fuck do they see in her?!” Until she saw it too. The shape of your eyes. The trace of your lips. How soft your skin felt. She couldn’t accept the desire you caused on her. She knew she wasn’t gonna be able to have you in that way, not when you both hated each other, basically. Plus, she wasn’t yet ready to admit that what she felt was attraction. She was still in denial. So the only thing she could do, was bully you. It was the only way of touching you, of being close to you, of having any control over you. Aeri needed to relief the frustration you caused on her as well. But her way of doing it was to do it on you. Like this. Enjoying the fear she saw in your eyes, the trembling lip when she had you under her, and the bruises in your skin when you guys fought. And every time she saw you with another one of your hookups, it was yet another trigger.

“Why don’t you start feeling like leaving me alone already? I’m tired of your shit dude.” You told her on a serious tone. This just made the girl in front of you huffed (‘cause not a chance bro), but it also caught the attention of another classmate of yours.

“Why don’t you just leave her alone, y/n?” You heard Mark said, and you sighed and rolled your eyes on an exaggerated manner.

“Man, who the fuck asked for your opinion, Mark?” You told him, hoping he’d just shut up. You knew you couldn’t bother HIM much, you basically grew up with this guy since he was the son of one of your father’s business partners, but oh my god one day he was gonna get it.

“Y-you’re always bothering Aeri, what has she ever done to you?” He asked, as if he was unaware of the well known rivalry you two girls had. And the advantage she always had.

“Fuck off, Mark” you said, annoyed by the guy’s presence, walking slowly closer to him. He quickly backed off, scared you’d hurt him. Noticing this, Aeri got in between you two. Not because she was trying to defend the guy, but because she wanted your attention and he was stealing the moment.

“You’re such a bully, y/n” she said, looking at you with some sort of fake disappointment. “Leave him alone”

“Thank you Aeri” the young guy said, as he fixed his glasses.

“No but fr fuck off, Mark” the Japanese girl told him, and his smile disappeared in fear as he grabbed his bag and left you two alone. As you saw him walk away, you quickly felt a hand pulling you by your uniform’s tie. Aeri was walking you by it like a dog. Man, you knew you should’ve listened to Wonyoung when she told you to get those fake detachable ones instead.

“Bathroom. Now.”

Aeri didn’t need to force you into the bathroom anymore, you started to simply obey her from time to time whenever she told you to do something. She told you to sit down in class? You did. She told you to not move until she says so? You didn’t move a muscle. She told you to follow her? There you went with her. You’d do it with a bratty attitude sometimes! But you’d still do it, and she enjoyed this oh so much. There was something about knowing the power she had on you that made her feel crazy. Crazy over you.

“What did you even bring me here for this time?” You asked her annoyed. You were really not having it today.

Your question caught her off guard. She actually didn’t have a reason, she just didn’t wanna see you with somebody else right now. She knew Chaeryeong would probably come back to get you, ‘cause even when she played hard to get, it was obvious how much she drooled for you. And if it wasn’t her, it was gonna be any other side hoe you had, or your friends, or anybody else. and that, that she wasn’t having today.

“Did you tell your friend to leave my cousin alone?” She confronted you, not even sure if this was still an issue that Rei had. You sighed heavily, closing your eyes.

“Jesus, Aeri, I told you. I’m not the boss of her. I can’t tell Yujin what to do. If she wants to fuck your cousin, she will.” You spat, losing your patience more and more. Aeri slapped your head.

“Watch it. Don’t say those things about her.”she said, not happy about the idea of your friend even near Rei.

“I’m sure that kid is old enough to say yes or not about getting some dick, stop cockblocking everybody.” You told her, making her more upset. She really didn’t like the way you were expressing about Rei.

“I told you to watch it.” She slapped your head one more time and that was it for you. You grabbed her shirt tight and pushed her against the wall, making her groan.

“I’m so tired of your bullshit, Aeri.” you said in between teeth. Both venom and lust emanating through your words. It made Aeri shiver, you could hear her gulp. It was the first time you see her somehow scared of you. Quietly expectant of your next move. In any other occasion, it would’ve made you laugh seeing her like this, unable to move ‘cause of how hard and steady you were grabbing her. But you were so deeply frustrated and tired of her shit today. And seeing her like this, with her big eyes looking at you like that. Now you kinda understood why Aeri enjoyed annoying you so much, if this is how you looked when she did it to you.

“W-what the fuck, y/l/n” she said, her voice betraying her letting her stutter how she never has in years “let me go or else-“

“Or else what, Uchinaga? You’re gonna hit me again?” You dared her. Then, an idea popped up in your head. Without leaving much space between you two, you turned her around making her face the wall. Suddenly, the ring bell rang. “Oh, you know what that means. Class started. So nobody is coming here any time soon, dear classmate.” You giggled.

“I’m so serious right now, y/n. If you don’t let me go I’m gonna break you something”.

you hummed, untying your tie and holding her wrists together, tying them behind her back. The girl was softly struggling and cursing at you, but let out a long groan when you pulled her hair back.

“I’d like to see you try that now” you teased her with a sarcastic tone. As you forced both of you inside the biggest stall, you continued speaking “I’m so frustrated, so tired of you, Aeri. The only thing you do, is make my days miserable. You come here, you bully me, you hurt me” you said, pulling her hair again, making her let out another groan, to then close the door. “and yet… I can’t seem to be able to stay away from you, can I?”

“You being an overly horny fuck is not my fault, y/l/n.” The Japanese girl spat “maybe if you didn’t go around everybody here like a blunt, you’d learn to control that”

“If I go around like that so much, it’s ‘cause I’m trying to relief my stress and anger, so I don’t beat the shit outta you for making my life harder, you asshole.” You told her, grabbing her neck, and once again having her against the wall.

Aeri gasped at the feeling of your hand against her throat, both in fear and excitement “We both know that whatever you wanna do to me right now, it has nothing to do with beating me, you perv.” she said confidently. Aeri wasn’t stupid, she could see the desire in your eyes, behind all that rage. All that hate. She saw the reflection of her own soul. How you didn’t want her, but needed her just as bad as she needed you.

As you stared deeply into each other eyes, you couldn’t contain yourself anymore. Softly closing your eyes, you leaned in to capture her lips in yours.

Aeri was expecting that kiss of course, but yet she could feel the air abandoning her lungs in surprise, shock in her face as she felt your lips moving against hers. She wasn’t expecting it to feel like this. To feel this good. And you were praying it wouldn’t feel this good, ‘cause you knew how addicted you were going to be from now on.

As you didn’t feel her respond to the kiss, you backed off, but she didn’t give you the chance to even catch your breath as she leaned back and kissed you again. Deeper. Desperate. And more passionate this time.

Aeri could feel you moan in her mouth as she started to take control over the kiss, surprising for a girl who’s the one tied up. You rested your hands on the wall, on each side of her body as she started to leave kisses on your neck. The sounds you let escape and the vibrations of your throat motivating her to leave more and more bruises on your neck. “Lets see how much your hoes like to see this” she said. You weren’t much of letting anybody mark you up like this, but anything was and probably will be an exception if it was Aeri.

“Fuck, it’s so hot in here..” you murmured and started undoing the buttons of your shirt. Aeri explored your body with her eyes, cussing you for not letting her do it with her hands. She bit her lip, feeling her own body temperature raise.

“Are you gonna help me with mine too or what?” She ordered, and your hands quickly traveled to her buttons, opening her shirt but not removing it. Instead, you unclipped her bra as well, freeing her breasts. And oh my god they were nothing but perfect to your eyes. Your mouth opened, a moan escaped, you looked up to her, trying to read her expression. Aeri was biting her lip, containing a smile.

“How long have you been wanting this, fucking perv?” She teased, and you clicked your tongue.

“Don’t act like you didn’t want it too, you’re such a constant tease there’s no way you haven’t been fantasizing about this.”

“You’re crazy if you think I actually wan- Ahh.. fuck~” the feeling of your tongue against her nipple made her choke on her words. The warm sensation making her lightheaded. Aeri’s boobs were sensitive. Very sensitive. And the way you were sucking, licking, kissing them, like you’d die if you didn’t treat them right, she was melting right there and then.

“They’re so perfect…” you whispered in between kisses, lost on your own pleasure. From time to time you’d go down and leave kisses all over her stomach, quickly going back up to treat her chest until her nipples were red. The desperate moans Aeri was letting out were telling you she was ready for more. So you turned her around once again, and got your hands under her black skirt, the feeling of her bare skin against your hands making your palms itch on anticipation. You took the edge of her underwear, and slowly took it off, removing it completely and keeping it in your pocket.

You hiked her skirt up, enjoying the view of her bare ass. You couldn’t contain yourself, and spanked her. Hard. The sound of your hand against her skin resonated loud on the empty bathroom, but her gasp and cry were louder. You did it once again.

“That fucking hurt, you idiot…” she said, her voice now a tiny bit weaker ‘cause of everything you were doing to her. You gave her another slap, making her squeal.

“That’s what you get for hitting me all the time.” You told her, and continued to slap her ass.

The thing is, Aeri couldn’t deny that she was enjoying the pain mixed with pleasure of the rough contact. She liked it like that. If it was you, she loved it like that.

Once her skin was looking red you stopped, and contemplated the girl in front of you. You couldn’t believe you had her, your rival, your bully, like that right now. Her body so exposed, her hands tied up.

"Are you gonna fuck me or you're just gonna stare at me like a fucking idiot until all classes of the day are over?"

And yet, still in so much control of it all.

Noticing how you were almost drooling as you stared at her body with your mouth open, Aeri rushed you. Also because you guys were still in school so, you didn’t have all the time of the world. You got back to reality and shook your head.

"Why don't you stfu?" You asked her, looking at her eyes with anger wrapped in Lust.

"Why don't you fucking make me, asshole?" She replied, knowing the more she pushed, the more she probably was going to enjoy this.

“Oh my fucking God” you sighed, and pushed her own panties inside her mouth. You knew that if she could talk, she would be cussing you hard.

You knew she was right, you guys didn’t have much time left before class was over. So, you got on your knees and opened her legs, observing how wet her pretty pussy was. You needed to tease her, you couldn’t help it. The tip of your tongue started going everywhere but to where she needed you the most. You could feel her body twitching in anticipation, and you couldn’t help but giggle at this.

“What is it, Aeri?” You asked her from your position. She let her panties fall from her mouth to talk.

“What are you doing? I told you we don’t have much time. Or is it that you just don’t know how to use your mouth for nothing but to talk shit?” The girl said, trying to get on your nerves. And achieving it, your smile disappearing and turning into an upset expression.

“You know what? Fuck you. You don’t get my tongue today.” You told her, getting up. Her expression completely changed, almost to a scared one.

“What?! You can’t do this to me, not after teasing me like that.” She desperately said, almost laughing in disbelief.

“Ahhh, how does it feel bitch?” You told her, giggling at her reaction. You took her panties and put them inside her mouth once again before she could start arguing again. “Trust me, I know how to use my mouth on good things, unlike you who only use yours to give me headaches.” And like that, you went back to her knees, and started teasing her with your tongue again. This time though, it was her asshole.

This caught Aeri off guard, you could hear her gasp each time you licked her hole. This was new to her, and she didn’t know how to feel about the fact that she was enjoying it.

She gasped with every bite you were giving her cheeks, enjoying the sensation. Her gasps quickly turned into moans, her eyes rolling as you began to tongue-fuck her ass. Aeri had her face against the cold wall, hoping it would help with the high temperature on her now red face.

As you teased her hole, you also kneaded her ass. You’d leave spanks from time to time, listening to the Japanese girl gasp and whimper as you caught her off guard each time.

“Your ass is so sexy, Aeri. I love it” you said leaving yet another spank. The way you said her name wasn’t helping the girl, it turned her on more. It played with her mind, ‘cause why did her name sound a million times better when you were saying it now?

You decided to give her clit some attention too, but with your finger. The stimulation on both sides making Aeri’s head completely shot down as she fell prey of the pleasure you were giving her.

“Hhmgh.. y/n.. more…” you heard her say very muffled since she still had her mouth stuffed with her own panties. You almost couldn’t tell what was it that she said, but she was backing her ass against you more and more, letting you know her wish.

You decided to switch the game, turning her a bit so you could finally give some proper attention to her clit. Before this, you spat on your other hand’s finger, and put it inside Aeri’s asshole. The sudden intrusion, with now your tongue making circles and leaving short, quick repetitive licks on her clit, made the girl‘s moans hit two octaves higher. You were fucking her hard, fast. The movement of your hand almost matching the fast pace of your tongue.

“More.. more…” you heard the girl basically beg, encouraging you to go faster, rougher. And so you did. Fucking her ass and tasting her pussy so good that your wrist was starting to hurt but that wasn’t gonna stop you until you had her making a mess on your mouth, coming hard until her whole body was shaking. “Oh fuck.. y/n.. coming.. so close, please~” she moaned.

“Come for me, c’mon. Just for me.” You told her, and just like that, Aeri came undone. A loud, deep moan, feeling so good and intense that it had her sobbing. As she came down from her climax, you had to get up and hold her ‘cause her legs wanted to give up.

“You.. asshole…” she whispered in such a weak tone, her head resting against your chest as her eyes wanted to close. You couldn’t believe that even in this state, even after fucking her dumb, she was still capable of insulting you. But she looked so fragile, she sounded so tired. You couldn’t do nothing but to smile and help her fix her clothes. Of course you untie her first.

“C’mon, don’t fall asleep now. We have class” you told her, knowing damn right neither of you were going back to any classroom.

“Are you insane? I’m so tired I wanna pass out..” she said with a pout. This was such a weird and new side that you’ve never seen on her, that nobody has even seen on her. But it was probably ‘cause of how sleepy she was, so you said nothing yet. You decided to tease her when her brain was working again. You grabbed your and her things, and carefully help her out of the bathroom. You guys walked (her holding onto you for support) to your car, and you decided that the only place you could go now was your house. Aeri needed to rest, and you didn’t know where she lived, plus if you asked Rei, it would be too much drama, whether you lied or tell the truth (which you never would).

“Where are we going?” Aeri asked as she started to fall asleep on the passenger seat.

“Home, we’re going home” you told her.

“Hmm… dumbass.” She softly said as she passed out, her lips turning into a pout. You simply giggled and shook your head.

“You’re such a pain in the ass. Yet, I can’t believe how weak I am for you. And you’re a dumbass too, by the way” you spoke to her sleeping body.

You let Aeri rest on your bed for the rest of the afternoon. It was such a weird view; you almost never bring people to your own place, you just don’t like it. But you couldn’t believe you had your own rival napping there while hugging your favorite pillow, after having sex with her.

It was a nice view, though. And you thought to yourself that you wouldn’t mind having this one girl on your own bed every night.

If it was hard to stop thinking about Uchinaga Aeri before, now it was gonna be impossible.

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goldammerchen · 1 year ago

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Pretty much what happened character-wise! Even if I like to keep some of his edge

Hetalia Volume 5: Special Booklet Part 2

Slowjamastan is what fandom thinks Prussia is

#not arguing!#the fanon vs canon is true sdfsd #with his edge i mean the teuton comics with him being a menace #getting into fights; loving brawling; the way he insulted pol before he almost decapitated him and telling the pope to shut up (lmao)#or the way he still is very very egocentric (so yeah he def would be off-putting)#i think him still being p 'asocial' [both in the insult sense used in DE and actual sense] + not very adjusted...#(like when he throws away the book about socializing with others (????))#*coughs* cartoonish -or not: serious- asocial+narcissist. a weirdo like all the heta charas #*nerd voice* (fanon) characterization isnt in solid rock so it can be adjusted for the stories (a scale?)#like i do like punk!pru: from 'proper' punk to not-a-poser-but-shitty-not-that-commited punk (or like too annoying to the punk kids)#(perhaps still too soldier-like)#that image with him having a shocker and gloves was a request more than hima being like “he fr dresses like this”... OTL #otoh his hetalia fantasia 3 knight character WAS SO EDGY (aaand i love a different official drawing of him in a black hoodie)#he's (imo) a jock nerd lol. calmed down a lot (do-not-encourage); still somewhat a bully #oooh more canon dork stuff: he was scared of food ghosts (??); not eating food with faces; super scared of sweden to the point of fainting #he was scared of the cat!fran thing in that event... tbf that was super natural; and to this day idk if ger+hun defenestrated him or #or if it was pru himself. who knows #hws prussia #hws slowjamastan #ok im done going brrrrr sorry if i said obvious stuff #gilbert 'was originally designed as a villain like character but became much derpier with time (vol 5 special edition)' beilschmidt #wait im not done. with my “gil but he's the gdr w/o memories (so no gil anymore)” au... i make him more punk that canon i guesssss #(besides other changes. tagged as cold boot au)#in theory. brain doesnt let me write most of the time yay #cmment #gilbert beilschmidt

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elodieunderglass · 5 months ago

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It's not really my business, but honestly it feels like it would be advisable to hire a copyright lawyer. Like I don't feel like you're in it for the money, but it might be gratifying to have the guy milking your idea at least have to formally acknowledge you. I think I'd do it just for the peace of mind to know if I've been "legally" wronged or not. Either way, hope you continue to inspire, and live out a peaceful life.

(In reference to this post about the guy who pretends to have invented “Elder Teletubbies,” specifically how he is now kickstarting DnD minis of them.)

Ha, well, it’s all a little tricky I think. I might, hilariously, post on the r/legaladvice Reddit (even though they’re all cops lol) because the only thing I want here is for him to stop selling my “transformative work,” and ideally to stop pretending he invented it (which might be difficult as he appears to fully believe his work is creatively independent.)

I think if anything, my post counts as protected commentary or a transformative work of BBC’s Teletubbies, and I think it’s stinky to profit on that stuff in general (like I’m 190% okay with buying LotR fanart on stickers ! but I wouldn’t dream of trying to publish a fic with the serial numbers filed off. Why?)

I think ultimately I’m not a grifter, I’m a grownup, and I think it’s several levels of eye roll to sell fanart of a tv show on this level. I would be embarrassed to touch money made on that. I’m too fucking scrupulous and artisanal. I have toyed with a silly original novel for funsies since 2019 but keep saying things like, “oh, people will think this is too similar to something else that already exists” as if a silly original novel I write for fun has to somehow pass a Bar of Originality higher than anything salary-writers aim for.

I’m also pretty anti-intellectual-property myself in that leftist sense where I don’t believe people should be acting as if creative works are, like, oil. Like the resource extraction angle of intellectual property freaks me out, I don’t think getting super high-horse and snotty about Magical Brain Property is entirely compatible with the artisanal temperament I personally got going on here. I am like snufkin about this, simply smoking a pipe and making a flower crown saying “poor fools! Producing works for market, and serving as the guard dogs of the market, lest their work lose value if it becomes more common!” I do not have a high horse. I am not going to post 6900 words about the importance of defending fucking… Mickey Mouse. I buy those lotr stickers on Etsy! I do have a horse, but it’s a pretty low horse.

If it was his own work I would not care about this guy doing this in the least (apart from loftily calling it stinky - but hey, nerds are common and nerds are stinky, it’s not rare) IF he wasn’t STEALING FROM MY ANTI-COMMERCIALISATION DREAM TO DO IT.

That’s the bit that PISSES ME OFF too much to ignore: that and accepting compliments for being original like 😌 yes my twisted mind did this idk lol.

Like if you asked him point blank about the artistic choices he’d be like idk my twisted mind just sees the Teletubbies this way teehee! but if you ask ME why, for example, the adult Teletubbies live in the forest I’ll explain that in 2017 I was at a major life crossroads and this dream was ABOUT that. It was goodbye to my identity as a foreigner from the pine forests, and full steam ahead to settling permanently in the fucking shire (where the baby teletubbies on the bbc show live). It was about going back to work having had my first child, and saying goodbye to my various career dreams for myself (famous scientist! Published author!) as I chose instead, finally, the responsibility of working humbly as a public servant for the actual good of society. It is about witnessing the wild and saying “I am not of it, but it is my job to be its witness and voice.” That’s why the adult Teletubbies are dancing in my native forests while I’m watching them from the English hills. This guy doesn’t know that he just vaguely heard “spooky forest cryptid” and didn’t develop it at all, I do more work than that with FANFICTION in my time off!!!

So it’s really about nebulous stuff and ethics and not something worth paying a lawyer for I think!

But thank you so much for this, I think the thing that gets most perennial about it is the TOTAL GASLIGHTING of the “outside world” of the rest of the internet like, fully believing they invented this, and they DIDNT. They’re so wrong on the internet and they don’t know

#adult Teletubbies

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doki-doki-imagines · 5 months ago

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Hybrid!Cow Nagi x Reader

tw: Smut, afab reader, use of she/her, hybrid x human sex, Nagi is a bit mean, but he is also very very in love.

a/n: a small piece of a much bigger fic inspired by this official art. This is just the smut part, but I wanted to get this idea out of my system. It was set in a world where most people are hybrids, and just a few (like reader) are born human. Nagi is one of the local mailmen and the first person to meet you. It was going to be a long, fluffy fic ending with filthy smut. So take just the cherry on top, lol. Maybe one day I'll complete this.

Seishiro isn’t used to rough nights like he isn’t used to scratched knuckles and sore muscles, but it seemed the only right thing to do when that shit poor example of a cat hybrid treated you like that.

He lays on your bed, white hair sprawled on your soft sky-blue pillow, his large-fitting hoodie and blue pants miraculously clean. “Smell nice” Seishiro thinks, cow ears fluttering when your smell on the pillow hits his nostrils. It’s relaxing after such an intense fight. For that dude, not for him.

“It’s an honor to be my partner-“ “Nobody wants a simple human as a partner, I’m doing it just because my parents asked, and anyway they should thank me since I could get much better-“ “I don’t want a loser nerd as a partner, they should start to dress and eat better-“

Seishiro doesn’t remember what came first, but the clear image of you crouched on yourself, lips trembling and fat tears hanging on your lower lashes keeps playing in his head. His tail beat nervously on your mattress, remembering the entitlement in that loser voice. Nagi bites the inside of his cheek, hard enough to draw blood, your pillow now pressed to his face, trying to calm himself down with your smell. His leg twitches, remembering how hard he kicked that douchebag, straight on his chest, making him hit a table behind and surprising all his friends.

It was already a pain to go out with everyone, but seeing you on a date with a guy that wasn’t him, and treated that badly was the cherry on top of his already poor patience.

“Is everything okay Nagi?” A shiver runs down Seishiro’s body, making every muscle twitch for the surprise. He moves away the pillow, side-eyeing you, before plopping it on his back to look better at you.

“I have to ask two things-“ You nod, prompting him to ask whatever he wants, while sitting on your bed, eyes locked with his ones.

“Call me Seishiro-“ You nod “and-“ He gulps, throat dry from the moment your figure met his sight. “Are you trying to seduce me?” His voice is calm as always, but the intensity of his eyes makes you jump on the spot.

“Seduce? I mean, I usually dress like this to-“ You turn around, not wanting to look at him, embarrassed by his comment. Your sheer nightgown, with cute sunflowers embroidered on it and matching panties, left very little to the imagination after all. Not to talk about you being braless, a sight that sent in short circuit his brain.

“Usually, so not always-” He whispers, almost into your ear. He can see a shiver running down your spine making you arch. The desire to run a finger from your neck to your lower back is tempting.

He lay his chin on your shoulder, letting out a sigh, annoyed by the whirlwind that is happening in his stomach. “Can I kiss you?” His greyish eyes lock with yours, trying to read your emotions. Seishiro doesn’t move, waiting to understand your intentions.

You nod, and to Seishiro's surprise, you make the first move. Your soft lips touch his ones, it’s a butterfly touch that lasts way too little for the white-haired guy's tastes. “Is it good?” Your voice breaks a little and Nagi has to keep himself from pinching your cheek. “Yeah, but let’s improve.” He mutters back, full lips locking with yours, tasting a different shade of love from the previous one. Seishiro’s eyes are closed but he can feel your softer hands cupping his cheeks, before sliding lower to his chin and neck. He worries that you may have pyrokinetic powers since every time you touch his naked skin he seems to get hotter.

You moan into his mouth when his big hands start to wander, one groping your mound, protected by his rough touch thanks to your thin nightgown. The other pushed you towards the mattress, making you both slide lower into your bed.

“Sei-“ You break the kiss, breath heavy and barely open eyes, just to notice your lover laying at your side, the end of his tail tickling your right thigh.

“Can I go further?” He is surprised by himself. Seishiro, Mr. Hassle man suddenly asks for more and more, knowing exactly that he’ll have to do most of the work. You nod, neck turned in an uncomfortable position. Nagi notices and decides to leave little pecks down your throat, trying to make you relax.

Such a gentle gesture as opposed to his deft fingers lifting the end of your nightgown, exposing the soft skin of your leg to his rough handling. Hand groping and slapping your thigh with no finesse and for his own enjoyment.

“Ngh, Nagi-“ You get interrupted by another slap to your leg, making your ass grind into his lap, a gesture that generates a choked moan in Seishiro’s throat. “I told you to call me Seishiro-“ He spits out, leaving a small bite on your shoulder, not too hard to bruise, but still leaving a sign.

Nagi’s lips find yours again, his tongue prodding at your entrance, asking, wanting, to lap into your mouth, to drink your moans, and to taste your spit. You surrender immediately, your tongue weakly fighting against his, lost to the pleasure this entire situation is bringing you. The hand that was massaging your leg is sliding closer to your core, bunching your nightgown to your waist. A deft finger slides into your panties, playing first with one curl of your hairs, before pulling it, making you groan.

“She kept herself untouched for me, maybe she hoped to scare that loser off-“Seishiro thinks, pushing his hips, and therefore his boner against your ass, that idea clouding his brain even more. “I like them, keep them for me, mh?” He pants in your mouth, your lips still slightly open from the previous kiss. A high-pitched moan leaves your lips and Nagi takes it as consent to his order instead of a response to his forefinger assaulting your clit.

Seishiro has never been a patient guy, and it shows even now when his fingers caress your outer folds before digging a bit deeper, but never enough for your taste, edging you constantly while playing with the bundle of nerves with no grace. He wants to see fat tears roll down your cheeks, he wants to hear you beg for him, he wants to feel desired, and he wants it now.

“Sei-Seishiro!” You half scream, closing your eyes and finally, making tears escape. Nagi keeps himself from smirking, but his heart roars in pleasure at the sight. “Good-“

“You-you are a bully.” You interrupt him, your own phrase is broken by sighs of pleasure. Breath gets caught in his throat, not expecting to hear that from you, dick twitching when hearing your voice in strain.

“So, you don’t like me anymore? You want me to get out?” Seishiro teases you, speeding up the movement of his fingers. Your head moving left and right tells him all he needs to know, together with the hand that keeps pulling at the collar of his hoodie to keep him close. He finally pushes his middle finger inside your wet core “So wet, for me.” He mumbles biting his lower lip, thrusting faster, and soon adding the ring finger, curling them so deliciously that your eyes cross in pleasure. You are a mess, but Seishiro is no better, grinding his clothed boner into your ass desperately searching for relief, while his tail keeps trashing on his side of the bed, trying not to hurt your softer, human skin.

“Ah-ah” You moan, almost into his mouth, tears still rolling down your cheeks.

“Why do you keep your mouth open? C’mon if you need to say something, say it-“ The malice in his voice is clear, teasing you so meanly, but he can’t really stop himself from trying to push your buttons.

“Ngh-bully!” You groan back, your hand sliding to his hard-on groping it through his gym pants, noticing the big wet patch.

And how big he is.

“Ah-“ He moans too, the touch of your smaller hand driving him almost immediately to completion. It soon becomes a competition on whom would crumble first, both your bodies hot and sweaty trying to pull away but at the same time searching desperately for each other touch.

You reach your end first, throwing your head back into his shoulder, and letting out a high-pitched moan that Seishiro is sure to remember till he breathes. He pulls away as soon as possible, laying on his back and immediately pushing down, just the needed amount, his pants and boxers, freeing his erection, which hit his still-covered abdomen.

“Angh-“ He groans half in pain and half in pleasure for being finally able to free his cock, all flushed and angry for being edged for so long.

“Sei-“ You turn around. The mixture of your sweet, wet eyes and soft voice almost makes Nagi cum on the spot. “G-give me a moment. Then I-I can try to ride you.” You say in between heavy breaths, still swimming in the pleasure of the previous orgasm.

But as much as Seishiro would like to accept “N-No, turn around like before.” He orders, but to your ears, it seems more like he is begging you. Nagi notices and damn himself for sounding so pathetic, but the image of you on top of him, wet eyes, pouty mouth, and trembling legs, still wearing that damn sheer nightgown, wouldn’t make him last.

To say the truth just that image is sending him over the edge.

You nod at his request, turning around just like he asked; you must have thrown your panties somewhere since your back is completely exposed to him. Some droplet of your essence stains the apex of your legs, making Seishiro damn himself for not going down on you, having now to settle for his fingers to taste you.

Seishiro doesn’t indulge too much in your taste, even if it matches your smell, intoxicating, therefore he rolls on your side, grabbing your waist to pull you closer, his erection grinding against your back, slick with all the pre that copiously rolled down during your intercourse.

“Is-Is it gonna fit?” You look at him, and Nagi doesn’t have in him to lie to such sweet eyes “Maybe. I’ll go slow. If you were a cow hybrid it would have been easier-“ He brushes away some hair sticking to your forehead to land a sweet long kiss there “But I want you. More than any hybrid, ever. If it hurts I’m gonna stop.” He kisses your cheek, now dry after all those tears, before pushing just the tip inside your core.

Seishiro sees you wince, but you don’t tell him to stop. His left hand that was holding your waist is now entwined with yours, the other massaging your bosom, but not resisting the desire to pinch your pert nipple. Nagi pecks down your neck, to your chest, while sliding his throbbing member inside you, trying to ease your pain.

“Ngh-“ He groans, irises become liquid bliss. You are so warm and welcoming, sucking him in like you were made to fit together. All those hybrid theories could go fuck themselves because the white-haired guy is sure nobody could make him feel so ecstatic. “You are so good- so good for me.” He moans in between kisses, pushing your nightgown up to touch your trembling tummy, mouth now kissing and sucking your covered chest, pulling sweet moans out of your throat, while his tail tries to encircle your lifted leg to keep you impossibly close.

“You-You feel so nice Sei-“ You breathe out, scratching the little hair on his nape pulling a guttural groan from his mouth. He looks back at you, and you twitch feeling his hot mouth leaving your bosom, missing it already “Can I fuck you?” You tighten around his length and nod, biting your lower lip eyes looking at him so deeply he thinks he may drown in them.

He starts slowly, never really pushing out, not wanting to be separated long from your warmth. But things start to go downhill when your sweet, almost mellifluous moans meet his ears, calling his name so deliciously that he soon gives up on rationality like a sailor enchanted by a mermaid’s voice. His thrusts are deep and fast, making you both mewl out each other names.

“I’m-close-“ You slur out, one hand gripping one of the small horns on Nagi’s head to find purchase to reality in this frenzy. Seishiro just nods at your words, having noticed way before you told him, his length almost slipping out for how wet you are. His deft fingers return to your clit, rubbing furious circles on it to bring you to your apex “Ngh-no, together.” You grumble, trashing a bit and trying to pull away the hand that was bringing you so soon to delirious pleasure.

He looks at you from the nook of your head, not sure you are serious about this. But the look in your eyes, so determined and confident makes him crumble. “Ngh, ah-“ A pathetic mewl escaped his throat making him wince for how cringe he sounded, his thrusts now sloppy and with no finesse, just trying to grind the both of you to the apex. Seishiro kisses your already swollen lips when you reach your peak, too worried about the pitiful sound he’d make, but damning himself for losing the occasion to hear your voice one more time. Your walls spasm around his length trying to suck everything from his cock, desperate to have all of him inside you. He thrusts a bit more into your core, not wanting to leave your warmth so soon, but the overstimulation feels soon overbearing.

You break the kiss, both your breaths are heavy, lashes hanging low like you are waking up from a dream. You cup his cheek, your thumb tracing little hearts making his heart thump harder than before. It seems like you want to say something, you have a cute little smile on your face but Seishiro doesn’t give you the time, his plump lips against yours, tongue already begging for one more dance. The overstimulation subdues to desire, and from the twinkle in your eyes, Seishiro knows you are on the same page.

The night ahead is still long.

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