#bc we really agreed that he trained to be a paladin since he was a child (obviously)

[mishiami]

me and my brother cooked up an mha/bnha dnd au not that long ago and looking through it all i'm just remembering how many paladins there are and how baffled we got about it

like. all might (oath of crown). hawks (oath of crown) (though we agreed on him eventually finding a flute and being like "OOHH BARD MOMENT"). shouto (oath of devotion). izuku (oath of redemption). iida (oath of devotion). mirio (oath of crown). dabi (oathbreaker, formerly oath of conquest). end*avour (we never figured out his oath bc we Hate him).

like the rest of the classes were pretty even or neglected but paladins were everywhere

[delaneytveit]

Back at it again bc I have no chill

I said there would be a part 2 and I always keep my promises bc that’s literally my only redeeming quality but its fine. so here is my life’s work!

part 1/ part 2  

It's been a few Earth weeks since Lance was first gifted his own shooting range by the incredible Coran. Thanks to having his own training facility, lance can go in a practice when ever he wants and doesn’t have to worry about running into the others. However, he still can’ sleep at night, his body is too use to the adrenaline rush of training at 3 am. 

So instead of laying in bed staring at the ceiling for hours on end, Lance goes to the Castle’s library. Coran has been teaching Lance some Altean, so he can semi read it now, but he keeps that knowledge under lock and key. Its not like it would really help the team anyways. 

What will help the team, however, is what he chooses to read, he picks up some medical books, and thus starts his modified medical training. Coran helps out as well, teaching him how to use the pods and about the minor procedures that would be helpful in the field and in the infirmary. 

Coran knows better than to ask Lance why he wants to learn such things. He’s heard the offhanded jokes the boy makes about being useless, and though he wants to do everything in his power to convince the blue paladin that even if he didn’t know these things, that he is far from useless, he doesn’t. He decides instead to help him. 

In all honesty, the Altean was disappointed more than anything. Disappointed in the way the rest of the team, save for number two, seemed to do naught but call out Lance’s weakness in training and mistakes in missions. It wasn’t fair to the poor boy who was working so hard to be enough for a team that disregarded the effort. He couldn’t really fault them though, they didn’t know that the bags under his eyes were from the long nights spent studying medicine in a completely different language. They didn’t know the stiffness in his muscles were from the hours upon hours of training he did in the range. But he was tired of it. 

One day, after a particularly hard training session, and a much too harsh lecture by Allura and Shiro, Lance had left the raining deck and went straight to the shooting range. The words Allura had spoke pounded in his head the whole trip there.

 “If you would only just focus instead of thinking everything is a joke, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.” 

“I don’t understand why you can’t just get this level, its not that hard, Keith passed it on the first try.” 

“Maybe if you put in the extra practice you would be able to make the shots you need.” 

Extra practice. Extra practice? Because the 8 hours he put in yesterday and the 7 hours the day before weren't enough, right? He marched straight to the range. 

Coran waited until Lance had left the deck before approaching the group. “That wasn’t fair to say, Princess. He's been working very hard.” 

it was number four that scoffed at that, which made Coran frown. “Walk with me, all of you.” 

He led them down the hallways, he very path he led Lance, the boy who had become a son to him, that first night he had gifted the range to him. He ignored the questions of where they were going, and instead led them to a door that opened to a room he frequented quite often. The observation room of the range. 

They had arrived just in time to watch Lance, now dressed in a black short sleeve shirt and tactical pants emerge from the dressing room. They watched as he walked into the weapons locker directly across from them and retrieve two different cases. 

“Azure, play Fuck the police.” He said aloud, placing the cases on the counter facing the targets. 

“Playing Fuck tha Police by NWA.” a female automated voice spoke, and the sound of the music filled the room. 

 Pidge chuckled at that. “He would.” 

As the song played, Lance loaded his first firearm, a version that looked a lot like a handgun from Earth, and aimed at the first target. 

The group watched in awe as Lance hit target after target. Not missing a shot. When he was satisfied, he switched to a bigger blaster, and did the same process. They watched as he switched from fixed targets to moving targets. The little droid bots moving around the back of the range, and he made every shot. To say that they were impressed was an understatement. 

“He’s amazing.” Shiro stated, never moving his eyes from the boy he had just spent an entire training session scolding. 

“He is. He’s a marksman, he needs distance.” Coran said simply, pride in his voice. 

But he wasn’t done. Lance returned the cases to the locker and grabbed his Bayard. He locked the locker and made his way to the ladder next to it. He climbed up and settled himself into the spot, activating his Bayard into a sniper rifle. He laid down and leveled his rifle, before making the command to release the moving targets. 

“The range is more that triple the size of the training deck,”Coran states, earning a few astonished looks from the paladins and the Princess alike. 

10 bots were released, 10 shots were taken,not a single bot remained. 

They watched him for a bit more before Hunk’s stomach decided to growl. Shiro proposed a lunch break and the rest of the group agreed. They began to make their way out of the observation room, only to realize that Keith hadn’t moved from where he stood. 

“Keith, c’mon, we’re hungry.” Pidge whined. 

He didn’t respond, Keeping his eyes on Lance as the sniper continued to make shot after shot on the small flying droids that were on the other side of the giant room. He was so engrossed in the display that he almost didn’t feel Shiro place a hand on his shoulder. 

“Keith, what’s up?”

“...Is anyone else coming to the realization that this guy could have killed all of us at any time and we wouldn’t see it coming?” He joked, in all honesty he was more impressed than anything. 

Shiro chuckled at that, “He is a pretty amazing shot. Which reminds me, I think we all owe Lance an apology for our comments, its clear he puts in a lot of time into his training.” 

There were nods all around as the group finally decided to exit the observation room and go get some lunch. Hunk volunteering to bring Lance a plate. 

They all promised to have a meeting with Lance once he was done, sit down and apologize, it needed to be done, and they were ready to make up for their unfair treatment towards him. 

He may not forgive them at first, or ever really, but they hoped that by changing their ways, he would feel more appreciated as part of the team. 

He is their sharpshooter after all.

[raiyakun]

Okay I have some thoughts about the Little Lance AU!! First of all, it's adorable and I want that game. Second, Little Red and Little Blue are obviously each other's faves, but do the other Little Lances ever get jealous since there's only 1 Little Red? Also we know that Keith's Little Blue interacts with him a lot, does Lance's Little Red do the same? Is Little Red as smitten with Real Lance as Real Keith is?? Also early in the AU there was the idea that Keith just spent all his GAC on 1/

his Little Lance, which I love. But also how cute would it be if there were little arcade games the paladins could play with their Little Lance to earn points that can be spent on in game store items? Like a mini sharpshooter game and stuff, and the higher certain stats are, the more points Little Lance earns during those games? Keith spent his GAC bc he was too impatient to play all the games, he just wanted to spoil his Little Blue immediately, but eventually Shiro has a talk w/ him and 2/

Keith starts doing to games instead. Which then becomes Keith playing with the console even MORE so he can rack up points to spend on Little Blue. Also imagine, down the line when Real Lance and Keith get together, when they cuddle in bed together, Little Red and Little Blue are cuddling in their own little virtual beds too!! 3/3

Thank you!! All the Little Lances definitely adore Little Red (and Keith himself ksdjfhksd) and shower him with a lot of attention, but they are very aware Little Red loves Little Blue the most (I suppose you can say it’s because they’re aware Little Red and Blue are the “prototypes” of the Little Lance program) so they don’t really mind (o・ω・o)

Little Red definitely is very smitten with his owner!! He’s not as expressive and loud as the Little Lances, but he’s very observant with Lance and can pick up when he’s down or upset (and will try to cheer him up by trying to do tricks with the tiny Marmora Blade item Lance might have gotten for him one time). He also likes telling Lance that he’s pretty and he likes him so much, but unfortunately it’s all high-pitched squeaking for Lance Σ(・∀・；) (Keith, on the other hand, can understand the Little Lances/Keith’s squeaking and definitely agrees with Little Red (ㆁωㆁ*))

(gonna put the rest below the cut!)

I’ve actually had concepts about mini games for the Little Lances/Keith, and in my earlier notes, Allura got the highest scores for a bunch of the “training” type mini games because they were the ones she liked to make Lanceolotl do a lot when the other paladins got their Little Lances. Lanceolotl ended up pretty exhausted but he and his owner has got a bunch of GAC now (which is why he’s got the fanciest/shiniest items!) And Hunk and Little Angel are probably the kings of a pseudo Flappy Bird minigame (≧▽≦)

You’re right about Keith spending his GAC immediately for Little Blue, and he would play games with him too, but Keith just can’t say no whenever Little Blue spots a new exclusive item in the game store and runs to him with puppy eyes ｡･ﾟ･(ﾉ∀`)･ﾟ･｡ Keith is too weak! (He may or may not be receiving a bunch of complementary exclusive stuff from the game programmers though, as thanks (๑•̀ㅂ•́)✧)

And yes, there will definitely be some double date cuddling for both the Big and Little Klances!

[applecherry108]

first of all hooooooooolyyyy shiitttt

FUCK tungle. it took like 30 tries to log in on desktop. admittedly, i was using the wrong password at first, BUT, even when i remembered the right one it kept giving me shit. This is what i get for being L337 i guess... -_-

anyways, im only on desktop so i can add a readmore to say:

i just,,,,,hate voltron. okay? It sucked. it fucking sucked. i watched the first season and it was like, okay yeah, this has potential. and then s2 was like, okay yeah not as good but maybe s3 will pick up...

s3 didn’t pick up. it was just one long death spiral by the same idiots who fucked up the atla sequel. i hate their writing, i hate their story plots, i hate how they butcher any good ideas they have, and i especially hate their inability to have good character AND plot development happen at the same time.

I got swept up in storm of klance and that’s about it. i have soft spots for other ships but at the end of the day i don’t care. i just don.t fucking,,, care???

the fandom is a mess, the crew was a mess, everything was a fucking mess from the get go.

Like who tf is this show written for?? it has to be for like, 8-10 year olds. It has to be. Everything is just so....stupid. Nothing is ever properly explained, motivations never really given, everyone is just a 2 dimensional cardboard cutout of a trope. And that pisses me off so much bc like??? other shows aimed at young kids can still have great world building. they can have good world building and characters and overall story and still be cheesy and a lil dumb. cheesy and a lil dumb is completely fine!! but voltron is just so...godammn... BORING!! it’s like i WANT to like the characters but its just so goddamn hard when everybody is so fucking flat. by all rights, i should want to marry allura. shes everything i loved when i was little, from her color pallet to her princesshood to her white fucking hair!! i should LOVE allura but i don’t!! i kind of hate her. why?? i don’t know!! shes so...boring! and flat! and fucking PASSIVE! everything in this show lands so fucking flat holy shit.

pidge at matts “grave”? yikes, that was second hand hard to watch for like.... “oooh this is so serious!” but the buildup wasnt there...it was kind of funny tbh... and HELLA awkward...

don’t get me started on lance and hunk. bolin was my favorite look character for the first few episodes and then he got knocked to Comic Relief and had maybe two (2) importantish moments. he/they may be part of the main cast but they’re not main characters. they feel like background props to the Actual Main characters.

which brings me to keith.

FUCK keith.

that’s my reaction after every! new! season!! is just,, FUCK keith. god the show functioned SO WELL without him. he’s just so...idk. i also don’t care. what was his character arc anyway? it SHOULD have been about learning to love and trust others but we only get that in lip service and speed run character development (i hate the quantum abyss...so much... like yeah, who cares about SHOWING our characters mature, let’s just tell that it happened in afucking montage.) if keith were a properly developed character he shouldve remained PASSIONATE and idk, run support?? that boy SHOULD have piloted red, end of story. period. keith doesn’t need to lead he needs to learn to TRUST others and that insludes trusting other WITH HIS LIFE. i won’t rant about how we should have had black paladin lance, but keith should have never ever been black paladin. even after he “matures” he still sucks at. he’s this awful,,little,, Shiro 2.0. and I hate it. i ahte it and i hate shiro just a little bit. even though he was arguably the most likeable character, he shouldve stayed dead. or missing. or whatever. he didn’t need to come back and they didnt need to make keith a little offbrand clone of him. i ESPECIALLY hate that they aged keith up 2 years for no goddamn reason other than to make him the Adult (tm). keith’s dedication to others was gre4at, but it should have, and im failing for this word here so forgive me, climaxed? cresscendo’d? whatever. /resulted/ in him playing support. not leader. lone wolf keith doesn’t need how to lead his pack, he needed to learn to HELP his pack. to be a TEAM PLAYER. he didn’t want the responsibility of leading bc guess what?? some people hate leading!! there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be support! keith’s entire arc is a huge mess of missed opportunities and a grand illustration that he is lm’s and jds’ favorite, just like fucking mako.

i won’t rant about mako, but just know i fucking hate him and the special treatment he gets, and good LORD does keith take over mako. keith isn’t space zuko he’s space mako and it fucking SHOWS.

okay, i’m losing steam here, but like.... so apple, why tf where u voltron 24/7 if you hated it so much? because homestuck was over and i needed a new hyperfixation. and i really had to force it for vld tbh. and at the end of the day, it wasn’t so much about the show itself as the potential of klance (or sheith, up until s3). between the interviews, the coding, the fucking EVERYTHING--it really felt like it could be canon. i knew in my heart it was queer baiting but i had HOPE dammit. hope that this could be killer representation, hope that these characters would delvelopment into something incredible. again, there was so much POTENTIAL. and all of it was wasted. everything really came to a head during the fucking game show episode. it was like lm and lds giving everyone who likes lance the middle finger, really driving home that “no no, he IS just stupid. he’s the comic releif. there’s nothing deeper about him and no one will stand up for him bc they all think of him as such.” and that just....broke my heart. we were so...SO close to lance actually mattering but nope! bolin’d again! and what was his purpose in s8? why to be an accessory to allura of course!

i’ve seen a lot of people really divorce themselves from canon and live solely for fanon, esp fanon klance but like.... i can’t. i just can’t. it’s so fucking hard to work with these cardboard characters. you can only draw so much depth onto them, you know? until the very last moments they had potential, but then it all got snuffed out. but who cares about canon? why bother with it? because! we don’t have a solid consistent fanon version of them! no one sat down and delivered the ten commandments of “here’s what we agree k and l are actually like” it’s stupid and it sucks because everyone has their own little differences and its so so tiring to basically be interacting with minutely different ocs all the goddamn time. canon matters bc it gives everyone the same base to work with. like a cooking showing with the same basket ingredients, but now it’s like.... ya’ll don’t wanna use the mandatory ingredients (and why would you? those canon ingredients are like, a century egg and spoiled sardines, they’re awful.)

okay, and im at work and just came back to this and dont remember my train of thought so like... what really threw all this into sharp clarity was the recent steven universe episodes. they were so...GOOD. so fucking good. so much plot and foreshadowing coming to a head. it was such a wonderfully satisfying payoff that it made me remember what a GOOD show is like, how vld is so very very /bad/. the difference is fucking striking. where one is an intricately woven tale with excellent character development and clear story AND character arcs, that can progress AT THE SAME TIME, one is a hacked together flaming dumpster firing that constantly falls flat and doesn’t know where its going or why. and it s so BORING! like fight scenes can be amazing! they can be well coreographed and tense! and we as the audience can be anxious about the outcome! and vld just wasn’t that! it was boring repetetive action in the least exciting way. and where su set up a lot of potential, holy shit they DELIVERED on that potential. not just for rep, but for characters! for story! for plain ol simple character interactions! and then, again, two dimensional cardboard cutouts.

and now with this difference in good vs bad show so very clearly highlighted for me, i just.... i can’t, anymore, with vld. it sucks. it sucked and i can’t pretend or force a fixation with it that just isn’t there, and truthfully, probably never was. maybe that’s why i’ve been struggling to finish my fic, struggling ever since i posted the last chapter, ever since s7, which, again, that game show was really the nail in the coffin as far as holding onto any hope that this tire fire would ever pick up. like a physically feel ill trying to finishing this stupid fic bc i don’t care so hard. i don’t care and i just... really want to be over it. im sick of seeing it everywhere, im sick of the drama, of the Discourse. like all fandoms have their issues, but hold fuck does vld fandom have a massive Purity problem. like, god, let people ship whatever. who cares. die mad about it.

like homestuck, idk if i’ll ever fully ween myself off vld but i want to move on. i want to enjoy Other Things without having this lackluster weight on my shoulders. and more than anything, i want to stop feeling like im obligated to like the same shit as i did two years ago, or last year, or hell, last week! feel free to unfollow, but yeah i just.... really needed to let this out in a proper post and not in the misc tags somewhere.

[quillyfied]

playing catchup, here’s some thoughts about DCA episode 120, with 121 coming here in a bit.

- I love these fireside episodes, and Satine Phoenix is an excellent person to mediate their discussions; she’s very warm and empathetic and these losers need that desperately

- Strix’s timeline is screwy, as I believe I have discussed on this blog before, but…uh…there’s a particular piece of Strix backstory Holly wrote that if it happened before she went to Baba Yaga…yikes. I don’t want to discuss it in too much detail but Strix would still have been so, so young for this particular piece of trauma, that’s gut-wrenching to think about. All of their childhoods included some form of trauma at a heartbreakingly young age and all of it is hard to think about but wooow.

- Paladin training is no joke, but I wonder how much younger than the others Evelyn was, to have advanced to full paladin status at 22 (probably younger). Given her leg, that’s really hella impressive.

- Relissa and Kagan are TERRIBLE and I can’t wait until we meet them, I am hoping for bloodshed on Diath’s behalf. But now Diath’s question to Paultin during the therapy episode makes more sense—“Was she nice to you?” KILL ME

- Diath’s fond smile and his tone of voice when he says her name after Strix says “so we CAN kill them!”, I’m drowning in my feelings pls help

- Yeah, trying to parse the conversation better, it does sound like Diath was dating both of them. So polyamorous Diath is most likely canon, which is…huge, honestly.

- Just going off of the body language and his facial expressions…that is not Diath’s root fear of cages and enclosed spaces. He probably had that long before Relissa and Kagan got to him. If anything, being imprisoned for a crime he didn’t commit would probably crystalize that fear into a full-on psychosis, if it wasn’t there already

- okay imagining little bitty Evelyn zipping around in her boots makes me SO HAPPY, what a cutie patootie she must’ve been. Her expressed desire to be helpful is also very telling of an active child who felt useless bc she couldn’t get around as well, and I’m sure Father Sunbright capitalized on that desire to be useful to turn her into the self-sacrificing paladin she is (I’m sure to make her self-sacrificing and indebted to him personally, not just Lathander, but I’m bitter about him and hope either he doesn’t get raised or if Telastin tries, he just doesn’t come back…sidenote, I wonder if Chris is worried about too many plot threads out there waving in the wind that he has to braid back together, I’m sure he can do it, but this season is so complex compared to others)

- MORE ABOUT PAULTIN’S CHILDHOOD PLS. NATE. NATE PLS. I know that alcohol-induced amnesia is a huge part of Paultin’s character as an in-game expression of Nate not having much of a backstory for him, but come on, it’s been years XD He probably wouldn’t spill about it just yet, anyway, Diath hasn’t. I’m just grumpy and impatient.

- Aww yeee plot pie

- I feel like Paultin and Sandra having a rental is an important detail in this particular case; it feels like a setup, if this crime family was making a habit out of going into noble houses and Paultin and Sandra’s house was close to one. Maybe Sandra was mixed up in something she shouldn’t have been and Paultin didn’t know about it bc he’d been busy with work before she died, but the face-mangling in particular is suspicious to me. The whole death scenario in general is just brutal, suggesting extreme emotion or senseless bestial mauling (leaning towards the second), but making the face unrecognizable…there’s usually a reason why that happens, and that reason is usually either trying to cover their tracks or body-planting. So what I’m saying is, I’m reserving a shred of suspicion that Sandra might not be dead (actually evil, off doing other things, not sure what the motive would be, we just don’t know enough about her for me to make a clear judgement, but I’ve got my eye on you, Chris). I do not want that to happen at all in the least, for many reasons, but still…hmm.

- Diath’s reticence makes so much more sense now but I’m still a little heartbroken that he doesn’t feel comfortable enough with Strix, at least, to divulge a bit of his childhood to her. Yes I am upset as a viewer that there’s still so much we don’t know (upset AND excited), but after everything the Waffle Crew has been through together, it’s still baffling to me that they have mistrust and uncertainty. But them’s people, I guess, they all have their trauma that they’re carrying around.

- “Please don’t call me Hokage” OMGF JARED

- For real, though, after the clusterbumble Plurio tried to pull with saying Paultin owed him, seeing the real legit 100% authentic Diath express yet more of his devotion to his friend by tracking down people who hurt him deeply in the past has me absolutely sobbing, these stupid boys care about each other so much. Also vengeance!Paultin is kinda terrifying to watch but it’s been a while, it will be interesting to see where his rage takes him this time.

- (Esepcially given the talk he gave Alisanda about rage and revenge and how that hatred never goes away and changes a person for the worse, hoo boy, I hope for their sake that Relissa and Kagan really didn’t kill Sandra)

- EVELYN NO THAT’S NOT HOW YOU CHILDREN. My inner daycare teacher is screaming.

- Nat’s devotion to Diath is a+++++ and I think she in particular is very good for Diath’s development as a person and a leader. Also Anna and Jared using sign language onstage was great, I don’t know if all if it was legit since I don’t know much, but it was still cool to watch.

- Diath needs to go bond with Simon next…especially once next episode finally sinks into him :P (I am pretty sure they let slip to Diath what happened with Simon and the kid during the therapy episode, but the players forgetting details is okay, they’re all human beings with busy lives and insane schedules)

- Paultin acknowledging Evelyn as Simon’s mom is the BEST, I’m just waiting for Simon to call them Mom and Dad out loud now :P

- THROW THAT SHADE, PAULTIN, YOUR SON HAS LEARNED FROM THE BEST. YES DIATH, LET’S DISCUSS HIDING THINGS.

- AGREED, VLAHNYA, THEY SHOULD ABSOLUTELY TALK MORE.

- Squiddly’s mode of breaking the fourth wall without actually breaking the fourth wall is amazing, I’m not sure what to call his in-universe fluidity with the rules of reality but it’s delightful, I’m so upset it is a little weird for Nate to hold entire conversations with himself in a dnd setting

- They need to learn to take care of the kids…and themselves…AND EACH OTHER…I think I feel a whump fic coming on

- All of these poor broken adults need a mental health day where they just do things for themselves, where’s that special episode, Chris Perkins

- little lesson about love~ (once again getting SO CLOSE to someone explaining to Strix about feelings and giving her context for romantic emotions, WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP CHICKENING OUT ON HER, SOMEONE EXPLAIN THIS BEFORE I DIE)

- Paultin’s face-touch to Diath is a masterful little touch of comedy, combining Paultin’s two favorite pastimes: 1. Messing with Diath, and 2. Bringing back random plot elements and using them to greatest effect. I am 99% sure that part of Paultin’s motivation for doing that was planting the idea in Diath to touch someone ELSE’S face :P Or at least, the part of me that knows Paultin ships his friends as much as we do wants to believe that. Jared’s face through the whole thing was killing me.

- Parenting, you guys. PARENTING. BEING RESPONSIBLE ADULTS. Oh gosh they’re going to have to leave Waterdeep at some point (bc I have a suspicion that Dungeon of the Mad Mage is going to be, if not THE last, then one of the last arcs DCA has, IDK how much longer fifth edition is gonna last and how many adventures they can turn out for it?? How often do they update DnD???), which means leaving the kids, which means there’s going to be a goodbye episode and I’m NOT READY.

- Elements of this are bleeding pretty flawlessly into the next episode, whether Chris actually watched the fireside as of streaming 121 or not, so once that post goes up, I’ll be glad to explore more about Simon and why I’m screaming in terror and delight.

[beware-of-spoilers-my-guy]

A Trip to the Floor

Just a little langst I never finished bc I didn’t know how. There was more but it sucked so... it’s fine. It works even better with this new ending.

Don’t worry, it’s not that bad. Really.

Lance leaned against the wall, heart pounding so hard he was sure it would burst right out of his chest. His fingertips skimmed over the bloody gash just above his collarbone. He had long ago abandoned his armor plates in a weak attempt to ease his movements. He was out of breath and out of energy, but most of all he was terrified of being found. The ghost of a footstep echoing on the hard tile was enough to coax his exhausted legs into carrying him again, sprinting with all he had until he collapsed on the cold metal beneath him.

Shiro shuffled into the kitchen, yawning and feeling for the light switch. Keith bumped into him as he came through the doorway.

“...Oops...Sorry...Shiro...”

Shiro only nodded sleepily and clumsily made his way over towards the couch before crashing onto it and curling up into a ball. Keith came over to him and spread himself over the couch like space peanut butter.

“I’m so sorry guys, I didn’t mean to wake you all.” Hunk apologized.

“That’s alright Number 2, we all have nightmares sometimes.” Coran said by way of comfort.

“But most of us don’t scream at 1 am because we dreamed about expired pickle juice.” Pidge said.

“Hey, it was scary ok?” Hunk replied as he went off to make pancakes.

“Guys, please...we’re trying to sleep here.” Matt responded as he flopped over the back of the couch.

“You are all so lazy.” Allura said from the doorway. Somehow she was already dressed and her hair had been brushed until it was silky smooth. Krolia let out a soft laugh as she followed her in.

Lotor entered next, his hair somehow perfect even though he had not touched it.

“The morning is no time for this.” he declared, rooting through the cupboard for a coffee mug. 

Upon discovering that there were none to be found, he made his way over the couch and squatted on the arm before tipping himself over so that he looked like a big purple beetle on Shiro’s head. Then Pidge wearily launched herself into a faceplant on Keith’s stomach and let the rest of her body melt into the floor.

“Team, this is no time to rest!” Allura called over to the mess of bodies on the cushions.

“This is exactly the time to rest Allura!” Keith retorted.

His comment was met with a bunch of feeble “Yeah”s from the others. Allura just glared.

“Hey guys, breakfast’s ready!” Hunk said, bringing in plates and plates of pancakes.

After a hearty meal, the team seemed much more awake. That’s when Shiro noticed something was off.

“Where’s Lance?” he asked. “Has anyone seen him?”

The group thought for a minute.

‘He’s probably still asleep.” Pidge reasoned.

And with that, they continued to go about their day.

It was hours before Hunk brought it up again.

“Is Lance still asleep?”

“He didn’t look all that tired last night...” Coran remarked.

“We should to see if he’s alright.” Krolia agreed.

Shiro had a bad feeling in his gut and he didn’t like it. He stood up and left the room in a hurry. It wasn’t two minutes before the others heard footsteps rushing back. The doors barely had time to part before he came bursting through them.

“Lance isn’t in his room.” he yelled. “His bed hasn’t been slept in, his armor’s gone and there’s blood on the floor!”

The room went silent. Then the whole group got themselves together and began the panicked hunt for Lance.

It was another 20 minutes before a cry rang out through the comms.

“Lance!”

Matt’s face turned ashen as he set eyes on the battered body of the missing paladin. Lance looked the definition of the words small, vulnerable and frail as he lay there alone, curled up on the floor, shivering and drenched in his own blood. He fell to his knees with an audible thud and extended a shaky hand to Lance’s altogether too-pale forehead. He gasped and pulled it back in surprise at the searing heat that met his skin.

“Oh quiznack.” he breathed.

“Matt, what’s wrong? Where are you?”

Matt snapped back into focus at hearing the concerned calls of the team.

“I’m by the hangar. Come quick you guys, whatever it was that happened, it was bad. Lance needs a healing pod and he needs it now.”

“Hang on Matt, we’re coming.” Shiro responded. “I hope we make it in time.”

Lance almost didn’t hear voices calling his name. He barely felt hands pressing against his forehead and cheeks. He hardly noticed the drops of salt water dotting his skin. His brain too foggy to register the strong arms lifting him from the floor that had been his home for the day. He didn’t hear the pleas of his teammates begging for him to be ok. And he never felt his feet take his weight again in the healing pod.

“At least they’ll never find me.” he thought.

“No one cares enough to look.”

It had been weeks since they’d heard Lance’s voice. Weeks since the tension was broken by a dumb joke or a crack at Keith’s hair. Weeks since there had been a flirtatious comment directed at Allura. Keith, Krolia and Lotor battled as hard as they could, not letting up until one by one they blacked out on the training deck, the sparring bot towering above them. Hunk and Coran “accidentally” broke various things around the ship just so they could fix them and forget about it all. Allura engrossed herself in planning their next attack. Matt and Shiro found some alcohol and locked themselves in a separate room to drink it all. Pidge cried herself to sleep.

They whiled away the time, waiting for the happy reunion that deep down, they all knew just wasn’t coming.

And Lance stood still as stone behind the turquoise glass.

[tokyoteddywolf]

A Blue CatAstrophe Ch.9

*inhales*

YOOOOOO WHO’S READY FOR MORE CAT AU?!??!? Glad to be back! Have an update as an apology for not writing in so long! (My computer was confiscated bc my room was a mess) Anyway, have some Shance!

 Ch.1 Ch.2 Ch.3 Ch.4 Ch.5 Ch.6 Ch.7 Ch.8

Lance woke up, feeling much better than the day previous, and hummed quietly as he blinked awake, swishing his tail. He still felt a little smaller than before, seeing as his shirt was a bit bigger on his body than its usual slightly loose fit. He was on top of something firm and warm and yet not all that uncomfortable. Not to mention is smelled really freakin' good, like that smell you get from dust after rain mixed with lavender and a really faint undertone of black coffee. He purred and snuggled closer, shutting his eyes again and curling his tail happily and drifted back off. He was really tired for some reason, plus he felt lazy and didn't wanna get back up…

He pouted when he felt his pillow move… wait. Pillows aren't supposed to move. “Uh, Lance? I need to get up...” His ears flicked up and he lifted his head to stare into familiar dark gray eyes. Oh. Oh. Well shit. Lance felt his face heat up and he scrambled to get off of Shiro's chest, falling onto the floor with a startled yelp. “Oh quiznak Shiro I'm so sorry!” He squeaked, curling up to hide his bright crimson cheeks.

Shiro sat up and slid out of the bed, controlling his blush better than Lance thankfully. “Um, it's alright. You got pretty upset last night when I tried to leave you in your room, so I guess I just accidentally fell asleep trying to calm you down… Sorry about that. I'm uh, gonna go get breakfast. I'll see you later?” He phrased it as a question, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. Lance squeaked an affirmative from the ground, and Shiro nodded before walking out of the room.

As soon as Shiro was halfway down the hall he let the blush spread over his face and let out a long, deep exhale, trying to remember how breathing worked.

Lance uncurled from his position on the floor and decided to get dressed, and stood up on shaky legs, tail swaying to balance him out. “Oh my God that was so embarrassing!” He whined to himself as he sorted through his shirts before ultimately deciding 'Fuck it' and pulled on some sweatpants, but not before tearing a hole for his tail in the back. Though, for Altean sweatpants, the fabric sure was flimsy… or his claws were sharper than he first thought. Huffing, he stalked out of his room and paused, sniffing the air and allowing the smell of sunflowers, apples and nutmeg to lead him to where Pidge, Keith and Hunk were chatting in the common room, something about improving Red's flamethrower.

“Hey guys! What are you talking about out here?” He asked, tail swishing as he plopped down next to the source of the sunflower smell, Hunk. Lance yawned. “Man, have you guys always smelled like this?” He asked, tilting his head at the Yellow Paladin. “What do you mean? Is it a bad smell? I just showered this morning!” Hunk yelped, suddenly horrified. Lance laughed. “No, man, I mean right now you smell like sunflowers and that warm, earthy smell you get in the springtime, and snickerdoodles or sugar cookies of some sort. It's actually really nice.” He reassured his large pal, who relaxed.

Pidge tilted her head at him. “Wait, what do I smell like? Also, what's up with your voice? It's all… weird? You aren't using your L's right. Wait, is it because you have cat vocals?!?” Her eyes gleamed. Lance shrugged. “Well you, ya little gremlin, smell like fresh cut grass and kinda floral, as well as machine grease and cotton and that smell you get just before lightning hits, you know, that crackly almost spicy smell? That. Oh, yeah, and nutmeg too.” he listed off, and even Keith looked intrigued.

“And before you ask, Mullet-Man, you smell like campfire smoke and sunlight mixed with cinnamon and apples. Oh, and a touch of caramel for some reason.” He beamed proudly, but blanched when Keith smirked. “What about Shiro?” The Red Paladin asked, and Pidge and Hunk backed him up with matching smirks. “Oh, uh, well,-” He stammered, not noticing Shiro, Allura and Coran in the doorway behind him. “He smells like dust after a rainstorm, and lavender and black coffee with vanilla… also kinda warm, like just how warmth smells? It's a little hard to describe...” The Blue Paladin fidgeted in place, ears swiveling as Allura entered the room.

“How interesting. Did you recently learn this, because of your part feline nose?” Lance jerked to look over at the princess. “Oh my god Arrura you startled me!” he mewled, hair fluffed up and tail lashing in agitation. Allura raised an eyebrow. “Is something wrong with your voice, Lance?” True, Lance wasn't using L's like he should have, instead replacing them with rolled R's.

“That's what I said!” Pidge yelped, throwing up her arms in exasperation. Lance snickered at her reaction, while Coran and Allura shared a look. Shiro, meanwhile, had way too many thoughts going through his head, and coughed into his fist to get everyone's attention. “Well, I'm glad we're all in one place, because we just got a transmission from the Olkari and The Blade Of Marmora. A meeting has been called to discuss the matter of some major Galran outposts that have been causing trouble recently.” The Leader of Voltron stated, eyes lingering on the way Lance's cat ears swiveled to catch his words.

Allura motioned them all to the main control room, and pulled up the star map once everyone was inside. “We've agreed to meet on an uninhabited planet a few galaxies away, to discuss a plan of action to take down these outposts. Lance, you don't have to come if you don't feel up to it.” The Altean Princess said kindly, nodding to indicate Lance's… condition. Before Lance could speak up, Pidge jumped in. “Wait, the Olkari are gonna be there too? They have that connection with nature thing! Maybe they can help us with a cure for Lance!” The Green Paladin explained, eyes sparkling. “Since it was a plant that made Lance this way, maybe they have a way to reverse engineer the process further and leave Lance completely human again!”

Lance's eyes widened. True, being a cat had been weird, and his current state wasn't really what he'd like to be, but he did have to admit that being part cat was kinda cool. Vaguely he wondered if Keith felt like this, being half Galra. He nodded to Allura, grinning. “I'm up for a flight anytime! I kinda missed flying Blue.” He admitted with a shrug, and felt Blue purr in agreement in the back of his mind. Shiro nodded. “Right. Once we've wormholed to the location, suit up and head out in your Lions.” He said, taking his seat as Allura prepared the teladuv.

Lance flattened his ears back and gripped the seat as the jump was made, tail lashing since for some reason he felt really thrown off balance, like when you were on that spinny carnival ride that used gravity and force to spin you around. Tilt-A-Whirl, he remembered, and let out a discontented murraowing noise as the ship stabalized and he could get his equilibrium back. Apparently having sensitive cat ears meant you were more sensitive to wormhole jumps. “Alright, we're heading into orbit now! Paladins, to your Lions!” Allura commanded, and Lance jumped out of his seat, nearly vibrating with excitement at the thought of flying again, pushing down the sudden dizziness from getting up too fast and tugging on his armor before he paused. His tail! It was going to be squished and cramped in the suit!

Lucky him, he had almost forgotten that the suits adjusted to the wearer, and suddenly there was a hole in the suit for his tail to squeeze through, the edges of the suit sealing off comfortably around the base. He swished his tail experimentally for a moment before deciding he felt comfortable and jumped onto his zipline. Blue was purring with so much anticipation that he could have sworn she was actually vibrating.

He slid into the pilot seat, a little startled that the cockpit was sparkling clean and blood free. Blue hummed and sent him an image of Pidge and Shiro cleaning up all the dried stains, Shiro looking pale and more than a little exhausted, while Pidge had a grim determination set on her face as she scrubbed.

“When we get Lance back, the first thing he'd do is probably berate us for not taking care of Blue in his absence.” Pidge murmured, wringing out a towel. Shiro chuckled wryly and nodded. “Honestly, I wouldn't care if he flirted with Allura, at least we'd hear his voice again and know he's safe.” The older man sighed, rubbing his eyes tiredly. Pidge smiled. “Yeah, but you know? He wouldn't just tell us off for not keeping Blue clean, he'd probably scold you for not getting enough rest, and pull Keith out of the training room for some fresh air and tend to his bruises while clicking his tongue like an exasperated mother with a troublesome child. He'd pull Hunk from the kitchen and yell something about having a bro spa day, and he'd drag me from my computer to join because I'm his friend and we were the original Garrison Trio, and he'd tell jokes and make us laugh… He'd rope Coran into spilling some stories from Altea, and have Allura listen in too, maybe braid her hair? We'd all get pulled into story time, and he'll flail his arms as he talks about some silly story involving his family, and just make us all feel better.”

Pidge sniffled and rubbed her sleeve across her face. Shiro moved over to put a hand on her shoulder. “We'll find him, Pidge. I promise.”

Lance came out of the vision when the Hangar door began opening, an alarm warning the Castle that the Lions were ready to fly. Shaking his head, he slid on his helmet, flattening his ears down to fit underneath comfortably, and ran his hands over the controls while Blue purred excitedly. “Ready to fly again, Beautiful?” he teased, already knowing the answer as he started her engine and his gorgeous girl roared to life quite literally, standing on all fours and her rockets flaring to life.

“Right, meet you guys on planet! Bet I'll get there first Keith!” He yelled into the comms as he gunned the engine, Blue flying out into the atmosphere of the planet. “Oh no you won't!” Keith shot right back, Red flying into view as Lance laughed as Blue's joy at being able to fly again filled him, God how he had missed this. “Alright you two, stay close. We only just got you back Lance, so no wandering off!” Shiro scolded lightly, rolling his eyes at the sarcastic “Yes sir!” he got in response from the Red and Blue Paladins.

Keith slowed down a little, while Lance grinned and had Blue loop around the Red Lion playfully, tapping her head with a paw before dashing off, yelling “Tag! You're it!” as he flew off to the sound of Keith's sputtering and growl of challenge. The Blade of Marmora weren't there yet anyway, and the Olkari were barely entering the galaxy, so what's a little harm in playing? Blue dodged all of Red's attempts to tag her back, and actually shot behind the Green Lion to avoid the collision course. Red smacked into Green and Blue dodged out of the way, Lance giggling like crazy. “Pidge is it now!” He voiced cheerfully, and could practically feel Pidge smirking. “Oh it is on!” The girl cried, immediately turning on Hunk and Yellow. “Pidge, no, do not drag me into this. Pidge! No!” Hunk pleaded, but the Green Paladin had no mercy for her teammate and slammed into the slower Lion, laughing wickedly as she flew off. “Hunk's it! Hunk's it!” Lance cheered, absolutely beside himself with amusement.

Hunk groaned, before doing a sudden barrel roll and smacking into the Black Lion. “Sorry Shiro! Your turn to be it!” Hunk yelped as he sped off. Shiro chuckled and rolled his shoulders. “Okay, I'm game for this. Get ready to lose!” He said, Black growling in playful challenge. He immediately took off after the Lion closest to him, Lance, who yowled and sped off to hide behind Hunk.

Allura and Coran watched the Paladins playing around with fond amusement, glad that at least some of the stress of the past week was being alleviated now that Lance was back.

He really was more important to the team than he realized.

//ending this chapter here! Next up, The Blade Of Marmora, and irritating Olkari scientist, a new Second-In-Command for Kolivan, and Jealous Overprotective Shiro! See ya next chapter my dudes!  ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

[keiths-salt]

(1/6) as a kl shipper, i wanna say from the bottom of my heart: thank you thank you thank you. so many times i've wanted to shout stuff like "why do yall hate k/eith so much" and "you guys never cared abt s/hiro or a/llura, let alone s/hallura" and "why do you want so bad for this writer/artist to be a p/dophile godDAMN" like, holy shit. u beautiful salty jem of a pearl at the bottom of this tumultuous fandom ocean. -

- (2/6) even your blog title is golden, bc it feels like so many people are so deluded, trying to make a ship, something you’re supposed to sit back and enjoy, into a sort of spiteful activist bullshit-filled “movement” like what??? and telling folks to unfollow if they ship s/haladin bc they’re “cleaning out they’re blog”, like, fuck off??? sorry but here’s a salt-filled rant and i don’t know where else to put it so here! -

- (3/6) side note, i’m rly trying to get across to you that i’m NOT being sarcastic abt how much i want you to keep doing your thing, bc now they’re trying to tackle RACISM. in grosser and grosser ways every day! calling some of the only asian rep i see in media “white-passing” and saying that l/ance can’t have a last name that isn’t 1000% authentically cuban, whatever that means, buncha hypocritical racists. i have never been so angry and ashamed of a fandom. -

- (4/6) it’s gotten to the point where i, someone who ships kl and NOT sk (just my personal tastes), am rly happy to see any sk on my dash bc that poster must have been so brave! to post something as simple as sk hugging or smooching or whateverthefuck, i don’t care! you do you! fuck all these nasty haters, THEY’RE the toxic ones who just want someone to hate! yall deserve props! -

- (5/6) also, my compliments to the chef regarding that pining k/eith theory, it’s So Good, like i ghostwrote it somehow. the whole “projecting onto l/ance” thing (which is being done to a painful degree, i can testify) tries so hard to remove or overvalidate his flaws that it’s laughable. making lance into an insecure martyr angst-sponge hybrid with no agency and no room for personal growth, it’s sooo bad. -

- (6/6) and villainizing everyone else! reminds me of that jaden smith tweet: “when i die, then you will realize” shit he wrote when he was like 14. transparent af, like we get it, you’re insecure. and sometimes i WANT to hop aboard the black paladin lance train, but it’s always this idealized version of him that’s almost unrecognizable, and it’s at the expense of better black paladin candidates. goddamn ok, that was all my salt for the time being! much love, thank you and goodnight!

This is one of those asks that I’d love to keep in my inbox forever, but I’ve spent the last three days trying to come up with a response because you deserve one.

I think we’re all aware that tumblr is an explictly shitty place when it comes to “activism”. There’s this black-white-mentality that anything and anyone needs to be put in a box based on whether they agree with someone’s world views. Everything needs to conform to a specific label too, fiction is only allowed to be healthy, you condone what you enjoy etc., and the #1 argument by people on this site, also widely used by antis, is “Think about the children” but also “Expect everyone else to take care of you”.

People actively go into tags of pairings they hate and then yell about how triggered they are. Really? I’ve been repeatedly told to kill myself because I liked something they didn’t (and I’m talking about my 99.5% discourse-free main blog, not this one where I passively seek out conflict). You either conform to the popular way of thinking (shipping, in this case) or you’re irredeemable trash and a threat to the public. Any shit you get over having your own opinion will be justified because you deserve to be punished for thinking on your own. Tumblr mentality is the modern equivalent to medieval politics.

Fandom always has a terrible side - I know - but the Vo/tron fandom has become a place where people tear each other down rather than block the content they don’t want to see. Converting people to one’s own thinking has becume such an essential part of “activism” to the point where people forming their own opinions and learning about an issue on their own pose a threat.

In the Vo/tron fandom you see this toxic mentality with K/ance, rabid L/ance stans, anti Sha/adins and so on. You said everything I’ve been trying to say since I made this blog, and it saddens me that people can only safely voice their opinions and concerns when hidden behind the Anon feature.

Fandom isn’t always fun, but the Voltron fandom has become a place where people are too scared of posting their art or speaking up because they’ll legit receive death threats over liking a fictional ship. I don’t know if I’m doing a good job at pushing back against the anti side or if I’m just making it worse at this point. But salt, spite and messages like yours keep me going. 

[cometkins]

even more qs

1) What position does your character sleep in? ( i.e; stomach, side, back, etc. ) Describe why they do this — optional.

He’s probably used to his side bc Shouri sleeps on his back and he likes using Shouri as a pillow.

2) Does your character have any noteworthy features? Freckles? Dimples? A scar somewhere unusual? etc.

Theo has full body freckles that are more prominent on the high points of his body, he’s probably got a few facial scars and other random body scars here and there. Has his marks of adulthood, which are white scars all across his body. His nose is broken and it wasn’t set back quite right so his nose has a fairly prominent ridge. Also has a veeery large fiend summoning circle on his back over his shoulders that was carved into his skin, and the scars are a bit more angry and red even still

3) Does your character have an accent? What does it sound like?

I feel like Theo sort of has an accent? Mostly he doesn’t use contractions and speaks very slowly and kind of stilted.

4) Do they have any verbal tics? Do they have trouble pronouncing certain words or getting their thoughts across clearly?

I mean he rarely raises his voice but idk if that’s a tic. I think combining words (don’t as opposed to do not) is still hard for him since those words don’t exist in elvish. There’s a few words he uses that just can’t be translated into common as well that he’d probably feel silly describing.

5) What are their chief tension areas?

Shoulders and neck for sure, probably his head as well. Theo’s very inward with his tension.

6) If you were to pick one song — and only one song — to describe your character, what would it be and why?

Glass Heart Hymn by Paper Route. It’s a softer tone song but I think it describes a lot of the emotional turmoil that he endures, with some elements of his religious struggles as well.

7) How does your character perceive themselves? Positive? Negative? Neutral?

Theo thinks completely negatively of himself. Between the abuse he endured during his enslavement and the abandonment at the hands of his god, his clan, and his love, he feels strongly that he must be a truly awful, ugly, disgusting person to be abandoned so constantly. He’s just constantly waiting to be left again.

8) Are they a quick thinker or do they need time to sort through their thoughts?

Theo is all quick thought and action. It’s not necessarily clever or what’s best, but he’s very quick on his feet. He doesn’t have the patience for thinking on things, and I think he’s tired from the long-haul plan he had to escape slavery. Thinking for too long and being in his head too long brings him back to that state of mine, and being quick is just easier.

9) Does your character dream or are their nights filled with an empty blackness? Describe a dream they’ve had or a night they couldn’t sleep and what they did to preoccupy their time.

Theo has a lot of nightmares and night terrors. He can’t always remember everything but a lot of it is just trying to process through his trauma. He hasn’t really had the chance to over the last 110 years and while I think he’s feeling settled now, it’s all gonna hit like a freight train pretty fast and he’s gonna be in a really bad spot.

10) If they had a choice, would they prefer a subway or a bus for public transportation?

I think in a modern context, Theo would prefer the bus. Subways are usually underground and I don’t think Theo would like that.

11) What do they think of creation? Do they believe in evolution or do they believe in God? What is their religion like?

With how DnD gods work, Theo doesn’t necessarily believe his god created the universe, but he does believe she holds him at her mercy against his will, and that she is malevolent. He abandoned her long ago by now though; he has no time or patience left for those who would subjugate him. Oppressors and enslavers must be destroyed.

12) Describe 5 unusual characteristics your muse has.

Actually very good at singing. Actually a very good cook. Very fond of children and very good with kids, which you’d never guess from his base personality. Very physically affectionate with people he’s close to. Doesn’t know shit about anything not from the wildwoods; if it’s not a potato, onion, or carrot it’s not shit my dude.

13) Have they ever been so overwhelmed they had to stop and take a break from something?

This is Theo’s constant state of being but he is never allowed to Rest or Be Happy so he just toughs it out. Small things tend to set him off for this reason.

14) Are they a team player or do they prefer to be solo?

Theo goes along with the group because it’s what he’s learned for survival growing up, and I think he does like being with a group, but he’s so fearful and distrusting that it makes it hard for him to actually gel with a group.

15) Can they multi-task or must they focus on one subject at a time?

I think by nature of being a magic user he’s fairly good at focusing and multitasking, but I think if too many things pile on top of him he loses concentration.

16) What are their best school subjects? What are their worst? List five of each.

There aren’t even 10 subjects wtf. I think Theo would be pretty good with artistic and creative things, but more technical and mathematic things would be slightly harder. He’s got a fairly decent intelligence so things that require clever thinkign aren’t beyond him, but things like home ec, art, creative writing, biological sciences, those are easier to process.

17) Is your character an introvert or an extrovert? How do they handle big crowds of people?

Introverrrttttttt. I think really big crowds, like in a city or festival setting or smth are okay, esp since his clan was pretty massive, but I think he gets uncomfortable with larger… groups? like being alone at a party. If he was ever surrounded by like, 10 - 20 other people on his own I think he’d shut down pretty fast.

18) Are they a leader, do they prefer to follow, or would they rather just stay on the sidelines altogether?

Theo used to be a leader, but I don’t think he can fill the role very well anymore, and I think he’d agree as much. I don’t think he’d want to do it anymore anyway, because it was absolutely miserable and it was making his hair go grey pretty fast. I don’t necessarily think he likes following either, at least he doesn’t like being told what to do and not being given a choice? He’ll follow along with plans and such but if you tell him specifically to do something you have to be careful.

19) If your character was suddenly challenged, would they rather run away or stay and fight?

Theo will pvp any scrub

20) If your character was allowed to murder one person without any consequences, who would that person be and why?

This is such a loaded question LMAO but to be honest he’d probably have Auril killed.

21) Your character has been granted 3 wishes; what would they wish for and why?

The problem here is that there’s a certain deck in dnd and a certain card gives you 1d3 wishes and if I write my wishes down they’ll never come true. But Theo would definitely correct a lot of his past and a lot of the damage Jericho did.

22) Does your character trust people right off the bat or does it take them some time to warm up to someone?

I think Theo used to be very instantly open to trusting people before Jericho, which is part of why he was friends with so many people. Now it takes him a looong time and several demonstrations of positive behavior for him to really trust anyone, and it’s very easily broken. I think Shouri, and maybe a select number of others could get away with breaking his trust and be forgiven quickly, depending on how tired he is of being angry with them. Shouri especially he was furious and upset with for a long time, and I think he’s just in a place where he feels like he’d be happier just forgiving and moving on than sitting in anguish. He knows Shouri makes him happier than anybody, and he’ll give Shouri whatfor, but in the end he’d rather not be mad at him and he’d rather trust he means well.

23) Do they prefer romance or affection? What is the quickest way to your character’s heart?

I think with as touch starved as Theo has been, physical affection is very important to him. Gentle, loving touches are a fast way to calm him down and ground him and keep him centered and I think a lot of people would be surprised at how far holding his hand would go too. Holding his face is also good.

24) Does your character have any enemies? If so, who and why?

I mean, ‘enemy’ but he and the party paladin don’t really get along. I’m 50% sure she’s gonna try some nonsense to get Theo and Shouri to break things off somehow and i’m just. squinting. what is she planning. Otherwise there’s his former goddess Auril. He used to consider the prince of frost his enemy but I think Theo feels he’s in a considerable position of power over him so he’s not really an enemy so much as a pawn now.

25) Do they have any weird bedroom habits? Any unusual kinks?

Hair pulling, roughness in general, getting rimmed, toy play, being very submissive.

26) How does your character prepare for bed? Do they sleep at all or can they stay awake for days on end without trouble?

Theo probably just strips down, finds the nearest living pillow in Shouri, and knocks out on an ideal night. If he’s not present I think Theo would force himself to stay up so he doesn’t risk night terrors; he’s very embarrassed by those and I think Shouri knows Theo enough to be able to catch them before they get too bad.

27) If your character had one thing to say to their parents before they died, what would it be?

“We made it out. I fixed it. I did something. I fixed it.”

28) Are they afraid of death? Do they have any regrets?

I think Theo, despite being extremely suicidal, actually fears death a lot. I think he worries about his afterlife and what that will entail for him, because he feels like he’s only going to end up punished. He has a lot of conflicting regrets and regrets in general and I don’t think he’d handle the end of his life well.

29) Does your character get restless when things are too quiet or do they favour solitude and silence? Why?

I think it switches. Having people around can be overhwelming, but being completely alone is upsetting. It’s a mix of both tbh.

30) Finally; if your character was forced to eat one thing for the rest of their life, what would they choose and why?

Reindeer cream stew with herbs and potatoes. It’s his favorite food and he didn’t get to have it often bc Reindeer couldn’t be slaughtered very often; he’d be happy eating it constantly.

[queenofnohr]

ok session recap! this is actually a recap from the past 3 sessions but not a ton happened in them for various reasons (like our ranger + druid being absent for one, and our rogue having technical difficulties in another). with this I will be all caught up 😌

Fon!Salem piloted a sub, Roanoke punched a shark in the face, went treasure hunting and found an alchemy jug that was full of mayo

while our rogue was having technical difficulties fon-as-salem rode around on roa’s shoulders, embalmed a corpse using prestidigitation, and then they sat on the docks watching the sunset together (my DM asked us to roll a charisma check and people around us were stunned by how beautiful we were in this picturesque scenery)

we went to a mausoleum to find the stone of golorr only to find the entire place ransacked - bodies, bones, and all, then got ambushed by a rival gang outside (xanathar’s crew)

we accidentally killed a person in broad daylight but got away with murder (again) by negotiating with the guards since they didnt see someone stealing an entire mausoleum’s worth of bodies

we had some downtime while getting our only clue inspected and so Roanoke ordered a custom suit of heavy armor (glamoured to look like a suit). he didn’t have enough money though so the way it happened was that he kabedon’d Fon-as-Salem and the conversation went something like: “I need something from you.” “Oya? It must be important if you’re being this direct...” “It’s embarrassing, so could you just-” [the implication being have this conversation telepathically] “No, no, you’re not getting out of this that easy. I want the words to come from your own lips.” “I need.... *whispering* 600 GP.” “Oh my, you don’t have enough?” “No, it’s *lowers voice again* 1600 GP. I need you for this.” “Ah,  I’ll give it to you no matter what since you asked, but I am curious...” “It’s for a new suit of armor. So I can protect you better *grumbling* since you’re starting to do reckless shit like runnin’ into mobs by yourself”

the rest of the party: *laughing* oh my god ya’ll are too much 😂😂😂

in the meantime we also went to a bar  because our bard got a faction quest to investigate this....... paladin (? i forget) who’s been acting sus. while at the bar Fon!Salem and Roa also get another faction quest from the Zhentarim. They’re also the only ones to realize said paladin is like....... definitely possessed or some shit and his axe is sentient.

They make up a gameplan to deal with the dude, telepathically, AND EVEN THOUGH WE CAN HAVE THESE CONVERSATIONS WHILE DOING OTHER THINGS, my DM canonizes their telepathic conversations as: “Salem and Roanoke look intensely into each others’ eyes for about 3 minutes. (me interjecting: it’s not suspicious or anything!!!!! we can be doing other things while having this convo!) No, this is how it is. It’s kinda weird, but to be fair they do this a lot, so natch.”

The paladin invites us into the sewers to take down a demon. We agree (if only to try and deal with him out of the public’s eye). We get attacked by tentacle monsters. The encounter goes something like this - Roanoke: *gets bound by tentacles* Fon!Salem: Looking good, Roa! *IMMEDIATELY GETS BOUND BY TWO TENTACLE MONSTERS* Roanoke: *breaks free from tentacle monster* Fon!Salem: *fails to break free from tentacles* *weakly, whining* t-tasukete brother...

we get through that encounter, fight the demon, end up having to fight the paladin bc he’s FUCKING POSSESSED, complete our bard’s faction quest even though she isn’t even here

Fon!Salem & Roanoke look into our Zhent faction quest which involves finding a guy. The people he’s associating with are a gang of were-rats. Roanoke almost gets into a fistfight with them in the middle of an alleyway. Fon!Salem is able to diffuse the situation and they tell us to meet them on the docks next evening. Fon!Salem absolutely expects to get jumped.

we get updated on the clue and go to another guy who’s supposed to be able to tell us where the clue leads to - but he doesn’t wanna tell us for free. the party REALLY doesn’t wanna spend money since we’ve been spending a lot already

Fon!Salem (to Roa): “Take off your shirt, brother.” DM: “For reference, because it’s heavy armor now, it’ll take 3 minutes to take off.” Fon!Salem: “What if I help him?” DM: “It’ll take 1 1/2 minutes.” Fon!Salem: “Okay, I strip off my own shirt then help Roa out of his.” DM: “Yeah, okay. You strip your brother. Roll a charisma check.” me: *rolls a 23* DM “Oh shit, yeah okay. This dude is fucking enamored by your pecs.” NPC: “Jesus your abs.... I could wash clothes on those things..... Holy shit......” Fon!Salem: “So can you tell us now?” NPC: “W-Well, customer confidentiality and all... Maybe if you sweeten the deal....” Fon!Salem: “So do you wanna get tag-teamed by us or do you want to watch us make-out with each other?” Roanoke: “If you want more than that, you’ll have to pay good coin.” The rest of the party: “OH MY GOD *incomprehensible squealing noises*” NPC, trying to hold onto a shred of dignity: “N-No what I meant was either funding or ideas for my inventions...” DM: “I do need to clarify that he’s still staring holes into Salem and Roanoke’s naked torsos” Fon!Salem: “What if we sell you the rights to our likeness so you can make anatomically accurate sexbots of us?” DM, choking: “ROLL PERSUASION” Our Ranger: “PLEASE ROLL HIGH OMG I NEED THIS TO HAPPEN”

we did not roll high. I asked our ranger if she intended to buy one to which she responded “No comment.” I then asked her OOC if she intended to and, in-between laughing hysterically, still answered “I dont wanna answer that”

we were able to get the info just bc Fon!Salem 1. needed to silver their dagger in preparation for getting jumped by the were-rats. 2. bought a parachute backpack for a handy dandy escape 3. asked the NPC inventor to discreetly implement a grappling hook gun disguised as a telescope onto the turret that attaches to the twins’ room (just in case Fon!Salem & Roa ever need to backstab the party and set the whole bar on fire and make a quick escape, you know?) and the NPC inventor decided that was enough coin to get him to talk

we go to get jumped by the were-rats. we successfully incapacitated them which is where the last session ended and Fon is gonna wake the leader up and interrogate them straight mafia style next session.

Fon!Salem also got bitten by one of them and failed the con save and so got afflicted by the curse of lycanthropy. HOWEVER, there’s almost no downside to this as it means that Fon is impervious to most damage that isn’t magical or done by a silvered weapon AND because they are a changeling, even physical symptoms can be suppressed. so they might just keep it for now (our evil paladin friend might be able to dispel the curse?)

This is extra delicious thematically bc Roanoke, as a priest of Selune, is trained to hunt (evil) lycanthropes