#b/c my friends and i are stupid i guess?

[pixxyofice]

🏰 cursinguponcastles

of course i manage to grab everything EXCEPT for my anxiety medications. they're still stuck there!! in the House!!! every night I worry my friends are going to leave me for asking them to come along and some part of my brain is like "you wouldn't be worrying if you had taken your meds" and I have to then tell my brain the meds. ARE NOT WITH ME!!!

(this post is unrebloggable.)

-

(anon) asked:

plum? how have you been running this blog without anxiety meds?

🏰 cursinguponcastles replied:

Um! How did you know I didn't have my anxiety meds??

-

(anon) asked:

Don't the Houses keep stuff, like, forever? I'm sure if you go back to that House you'll be able to get your meds back. Unless it's like, frozen or something?

🏰 cursinguponcastles replied:

Oh. Ohhhh. Well, um! I am going back to get them! They're back in Dormont! I just won't be focused on getting my meds when I'm there, you know??

-

🎗 ribbpeat reblogged from 🍑 yetanotherfinepeach

🍑 yetanotherfinepeach

so was anyone going to tell me the savior of vaugarde runs a horror blog account or was I supposed to just find that out from her APPARENTLY LEAVING HER MEDS IN THE CENTER FREEZING POINT

-

🍙 chateau-riceballs reblogged from 🧦 socks-to-be

🍯 lovelyhoney-truths

and just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, the savior of vaugarde turns out to be a tumblr user

🛴 offowchmy-nkee

and this is bad... how?

🍯 lovelyhoney-truths

How is this not obvious to you people? She's on tumblr. She's been ACTIVE. Instead of doing her job of saving us she's been giggling about her little vaugarde boys getting eaten. I'm sitting here typing with one arm waiting for vaugarde to be saved, and she's wasting time reading. Boo-hoo she left her anxiety meds in the House where the King is freezing all of us from. Actually, wait! Why didn't she just turn around and take him out? If she's supposed to save vaugarde, assigned to, and she was close to its starting point, why the hell did she walk the other direction and faff about?! Some Savior she is! Most of the country is frozen because of her! And instead of just shutting up and doing her job she went on a funny little pilgrimage. I'm not calling her a Savior anymore. 

🐱 ChangeGirlClaws

do you know about the existence of paragraph breaks. Like at all.

🎀 darts-chatting-blogg

Instead of looking at... all of that, apparently not everybody knows this so look at this.

THE DOORS OF DORMONT GOT LOCKED BY THE KING AND THE SAVIORS HAVE TO FIND FIVE ORBS TO BE ABLE TO EVEN TRY TO SAVE US. And in case you don't know, Vaugarde is huge! The saviors passed by my place a week ago and they only had four Orbs then.

I think Plum and her friends are making good progress, actually! I think she's allowed to relieve stress by reading about guts and gore, actually.

🍙 chateau-riceballs

she's what

-

🐝 finalgirl-standing reblogged from 🐮 The-Cointry-of-Voigarde

🍯 lovelyhoney-truths

Not only does that orb bullshit sound made up and stupid, but apparently Plum also runs a guts and gore blog??? what the fuck is wrong with her. Has she Changed to be so disgusting when she should be Changing herself to be able to save the country?? Do you guys really believe that shit? I haven't heard of a House where Orbs lock the gates, that's clearly her making up excuses for why she can't just go there and beat him. How can her friends stand to be with her when she's this irresponsible?

🎀 darts-chatting-blogg

One. The King warped the place (see image here!) and Dormont was known for experimenting with locks. People just be saying crab, I guess.

Two. Defenders. Get their asses. I'll start.

C

🎗 ribbpeat

R

🍑 yetanotherfinepeach

A

🛴 offowchmy-nkee

B

🐱 ChangeGirlClaws

P

🍙 chateau-riceballs

O

🦴 justanotherchange-blog

W

⚓️ insertcreativebloghere

P

🧦 socks-to-be

E

🐮 The-Cointry-of-Voigarde

N

🐝 finalgirl-standing

I

(this post is unrebloggable.)

-

⚓️ insertcreativebloghere reblogged from 🦴 justanotherchange-blog

🦴 justanotherchange-blog

if I was on a journey to save the country and I forgot my focusing meds at home I would just forget everything. Honestly, Plum's doing much better than I am???

⚓️ insertcreativebloghere

If i had to save the country without my meds i would've thrown myself into the sea

-

🐮 The-Cointry-of-Voigarde

(a picture of the countryside. Half of it is frozen, and the other half isn't)

Well. It was an honor, everyone. I'm glad to have contributed to the crab pow.

-

🏰 cursinguponcastles reblogged 🐧 penguin-do-be-writing

🐧 penguin-do-be-writing

hi everyone, sorry for the silence! My family has been loudly debating what to do about the freezing country, I think i touched something weird and my feet have stopped working for me, so it's hard to get to my writing desk. whoops! it's been a struggle to get words written down. Don't worry, though! I've got a chapter for everyone! This time, things get INTENSE. That internal organs being not internal warning was for a reason!

🏰 cursinguponcastles

CHANGE, THIS WAS SO GOOD!! I'm really sorry you're close to being frozen, but I could see how it affected how you wrote Dembélé struggling to get away! It felt too real, haha!!

I'll miss your fics! I, well, hopefully, will see you in a few months!!

[midwestprincesss]

patrick zweig sfw alphabet

a/n: i love my mannnn. btw sex is mentioned in these hcs but like it's patrick so i can't do anything about that....... but it's nothing like. detailed. so yeah. also there's one single use of y/n (i hate using it but WHATEVERRRRR)

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

before dating, you started out as friends. then best friends. then friends with benefits. so it took him a lot of time to get used to the idea of being affectionate with you. like he was so convinced no one wanted to have an actual relationship with him besides from fucking him. so first he refrained from any form of affection, especially pda. poor baby didn't want you to feel embarrassed with him :( . everyone knew him as the guy almost every girl had a one-night stand with, so obviously he didn't want to give you a bad reputation. it was like that for a few months, until one day when you decided to ask him about it.

"why'd you drop my hand?" you asked him, eyes wide and confused. and even a little hurt, maybe. patrick didn't say anything. he just hummed and tilted his head at you. "patrick. in the cafeteria- we were with tashi and art and we were holding hands but suddenly you let go of mine."

patrick did not understand why you were asking him that at all. "there were a lot of people there...?"

you raised an eyebrow at him. did he want to keep your relationship a secret? art and tashi knew- you figured other people found out as well, so what was this all about? "what do you even- patrick. are you embarrassed with me or something?" you joked. but it wasn't really a joke to you, because the question haunted you for a while now. every time you tried to be even remotely affectionate with him in public- he turned you down. so something must be wrong with you, right?

he laughed. in your face. "how could i ever be embarrassed with you? i thought maybe you were embarrassed with me!" he confessed and you had to refrain yourself from actually yelling from disbelief- "why the hell would i be embarrassed with you?"

"i'm asking you the exact same question!" he said, looking down at you with a little smirk. but his eyes were sad. "thought you didn't want people to know about us. thought maybe they'd give you shit for dating the manwhore" he referred to himself, laughing a little.

"you're so fucking stupid patrick! everyone knows, and no one gives me shit, because guess what? no one cares. and stop calling yourself a manwhore. only i get to." you scolded him and he chuckled. "why do you get to?"

"cause you're my man. and you're also my whore." you joked. and after that he couldn't keep his hands off of you. he was so happy to show you off- and he was so happy you let him show you off. so yeah, he's very affectionate. in every way possible- carrying your bag, giving you his jacket, buying you every thing you could ever wish for, keeping hair ties on his wrists for you in case you need to put your hair up, buying the same lip gloss you always use and keeping it in his car in case you need to reapply and you forgot it at home, and so. much. more.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

your friendship with patrick started in highschool, really really randomly. you were both freshmen, and art and him were running after eachother in the hallway. you thought hmm i should be silly and trip one of these guys over! so you made art trip over ur foot. and patrick was like omg noo dont do that to him blah blah blah! it kinda just started from there. and he's like THE best friend. he's funny and nice and helpful and supportive and tells u everything. sometimes too much. tells u so fucking much that u knew all his kinks before you even started hooking up. so yeah.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

PATRICK LOVEEEEES TO CUDDLE!!!!!! it's his favourite thing ever. and it'll take him a lot to admit- but he likes being the little spoon. like yeah yeah he's a little bitch who's way too cocky for his own good- but he always needs you especially after a he's had a bad day, or when he's lost a match. he loves it when u take care of him. bonus points of u play w his hair<3

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

if he finds the right person(you😉), he'll def want to settle down. now...the cooking part- he'll try. he'll try really really hard for you but unfortunately i feel like the best he can do is make an omelette. but!!!! you two manage to split house chores, so you cook and he cleans usually.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

so i feel like there's no in between- he either just dips with no explanation, or overthinks it for 1 whole month and then when he finally gets the courage to do so he can't seem to actually say the words "we're breaking up" and just tries to give hints??? . i will not explain any further mostly because I HATE THIS QUESTION! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!!!!🔥

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

ohhhhh. before meeting you he felt like committing to someone was limiting- like having to go to prison or something. but after he realized the feelings he had for you were more serious, he actually started thinking about it- being married to someone as amazing as you didn't sound so bad. not bad at all. so tbh if he could have he would have proposed to u on the first day of highschool

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

ok this IS ACCURATE and i do not give a shit what anyone says- patrick is so so so gentle with you. (and like now im not talking ab sex cause he can def be rough there) he's such a cutie- whenever he says something he thinks might upset you he chooses his words really carefully. cause he doesn't wanna make you feel bad about anything ever :( (but like except if he's angry cause if he's angry then he doesn't think he just says shit)

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

patrick loves hugging ANYONE. literally anyone. i mean, we've seen that one scene with art where he's just running after him to hug him. he just loves physical touch overall. bear hugs = patrick. that's the only way he hugs ppl.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

it takes him a loooot of time to say it. and as much as I don't like it he'd probably say it the first time u guys are having sex, after you started dating and not while u were still fwb. of course, he's thought about telling you before, but he just couldn't!!!! but after you're done and you're laying in bed next to eachother, he kisses you on your forehead and tells you "i meant it, by the way. i love you. a lot"

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

really fucking jealous. and when he's jealous he turns into the bitchiest man ever. he can't help it. he gets a lil mean. like, a guy is hitting on u at a college party- but u brush him off, you tell him you're not interested. but now patrick is mad at you too for some reason??? he won't talk to you, he'd just give you dirty looks. all while constantly walking past that guy and "accidentally" bumping into him with his shoulder. maybe he'd even accidentally spill his drink on him, oops!

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

his kisses are hungry, passionate, like he might pass out if he won't kiss you. he kisses you EVERYWHERE. literally everywhere. and he mostly likes being kissed on his neck, especially if you leave him hickeys.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

patrick might be a cocky bastard to most people, but with children he's a sweetheart. he gets along with them so well, and children love being around him as well (mostly because he's a manchild)

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

slow. you wake up at 10, you stay in bed two more hours. he insists on spending the whole day in bed, but you tell him it's a really bad idea. "i'm really late for class, patrick." you tell him. and honestly, he does not give a fuck. he just pulls you back in and starts kissing you.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

screaming crying cause this is actually a sfw alphabet so............... i will be sfw....... on nights when you're really tired, you watch movies together. patrick loves old animated movies, like he finds them really fucking hilarious for some reason- as i said he's a manchild. you both just end up sleeping before the movie ends but still, the action counts.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

once you're best friends with him, there's no way out. you WILL know every little detail about him. the good ones and the bad ones. the ones you want to know and the ones you don't. he tells you every. single. fucking. thing. even if it's unimportant. he just bought strawberry jam? you'll know. once when he was 10 he saw his grandma naked and it gave him reccurring nightmares for 2 months? you'll know. there's really nothing you can do about it.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

i feel like he gets angry pretty easily, but most of the time it passes easily too. and usually, it's not about something serious either. like he'd be pissed off cause you told him you can't hang out cause you're tired. he'd text u shit like

oh yeah?

okay then.

go sleep

sleep with whatever man is in ur bed rn.

(3 mins later)

i was kidding!!!!!!!!! i hope u sleep well and ilove u😇❤️

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

he remembers everything he knows everything he is constantly thinking about you etc etc etc. he sees a turquoise dress. he remembers you once told him that your favourite colour when you were a kid was turquoise. he buys it. #richboyfriend! ,(more like rich parents but oh well)

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

he thinks it's stupid but one time you two were sitting in the kitchen, and you pulled out a crumpled up gum wrapper out of your pocket and with your lipliner you drew two stick figures, a girl and a boy, with a heart around them. you showed it to him and said - "it's us!"

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

not protective but more like possessive . as much as i hate to say it, you two have a lot of discussions about that. but at least he never comments on what you wear- "my girl can wear whatever tf she wants cause im afraid of her" is so patrick.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

he'd put a lot of effort into everything he does for you, but it doesn't always turn out amazing:( but at least he tries, and that's good enough for you!!!

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

i feel like patrick gets really fucking drunk at parties, to the point where he can't even walk without someone's help.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

women and men want him. like soooo bad. and all the time. wherever he is there's always someone checking him out. he literally radiates big dick energy. so I'd say he's not concerned about his looks at all.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

yes, very much so. even when he's on tour and he's away from you, he feels like a part of him is missing. if he has a bad day, he'd think "it's okay i'll go sleep over at he place after the match anyway" but then he realizes he's in another fucking country and he gets sooo sad:( but at least he can call you. so that's okay

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

patrick CANNOT spell also he does not use emojis correctly. like that man has big ass hands his phone keyboard is way too small for him.

hey hoeney i am donwe with practice!

patrick what did you just call me

oops i meantm honey*

or

im at the suprmarkert you want ice cream?👄👅

PATRICK STOP USING THOSE LMFAO???

why. Whats wrong with tthem?

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

if someone doesn't get along with art that's like a huge ass red flag for him so ...yeah😭😭😭😭

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

patrick talks in his sleep like crazyyyy!!!! and it never makes any fucking sense. this man never shuts the fuck up!!!!!!

"y/n"

"hmm?"

"if we go get the soap it will not be okay i already told you she said it will destroy it. don't go there. stop!!!!! stop!!!! put it back!!!"

"what the fuck"

yeah guys i had sm fun writing this.......... YIIPEE!!

[life-is-more-than-just-a-game]

♠️ How aib males comfort you having your period. ♠️

A/N: So, I got something in my mind because it's literally my time to shine ... maybe this makes me feel a little better. 🫠

Summary: You're fighting for life and death, nobody understands why the streets are empty or how you got to the Borderland in the first place, and as if all that wasn't stressful enough, you also get your period. It feels like anything is possible here, but your body is definitely no exception. On an evening when everyone at the beach is trying to have a good time, you prefer to stay in your room and snuggle up in your bed while you pout to yourself and don't feel like doing anything.

Characters: Aguni, Arisu, Chishiya, Karube & Niragi.

POV: fem!reader

Warnings: Not given.

A g u n i

Not gonna lie, I guess Aguni would be the man a woman would need the most in that time of the moth. I see him as someone who wouldn't be too intrusive but also doesn't make you feel like he doesn't care about you. He knows you well enough to know that chasing you out of bed or out of your room is pointless. As number one, he has to hold the position at the Beach, but that doesn't stop him from at least checking up on you.

And when he finds you in the room, as expected, he prefers to just stand at the door and look at you from there, asking something like:

"Do you need something?" "Are you in a lot of pain?" "Can I do something for you?" "Wanna be alone?"

Aguni is a man. He isn't just a boy anymore who would play down your suffering - your pain - or exaggerate it. Want him to leave? He will. Want him to join you for a moment? He will. Want some cookies or some other snacks and candies? He will bringt them to you.

It's that easy for him, there is nothing to discuss about.

A r i s u

Different from Aguni, Arisu would be the one who is the less experienced in that kind of topic. I can imagine he wouldn't even understand whats going on. So he asks you lots of questions, when he realizes you aren't with your and his own friends but instead lay in bed, impassive.

"Y/N, is something wrong?" "Did something happen?" "Has someone important-?" "I don't understand why you are in such a bad mood. Please, tell me, I can't help when I don't know what's wrong with you."

Let's be honest: yes, in the first place some of us girls and young women would feel a little annoyed by all his questions, but it's not his intention to! So, we shouldn't be such bitches and tell him at least the truth:

"I got my period today and ... yeah, that's it."

He may not have much experience with it, but we all know he's not stupid.

"Well ... I saw a plate of chocolate chip cookies in the lobby earlier. Shall I steal them and bring them up to you?"

Yes, king, please, steal the cookies ... ! 🫶🏻✨

C h i s h i y a

Definitely the most annoying and strenuous of all. Sorry, you know I love you, but you just know too much!

"From a medical point of view, physical activity relieves the pain of cramps." "Carbonated drinks should be avoided. The same goes for drinks with caffeine. This only exacerbates the pain." "Heat can help. And I'm not talking about the warmth provided by your comforter, but by hot water bottles or warm teas, for example - while we're on the subject of drinks."

Good tips, but nothing you want to hear in moments like these. No, really, we won't, darlin'.

"Don't you have anything better to do right now than bother me with your factual knowledge, Chishiya?"

He and Niragi would be the two most likely to awaken the monster in you.

"There are enough days left on my visa." "Means there is enough time to bother you with my factual knowledge."

... At least he takes his time for you and spends his day with you in bed, you can't deny you enjoy this a lot, honey. Neither can I ...

K a r u b e

A mixture of Aguni and Arisu, I think. I don't think he would be that calm like Aguni is and I don't think he would be as lost as Arisu is in that kind of topic. Karube knows that we normally get our period again every month, the only question is how long you've been a couple.

You have to get to know behaviors. Aguni is a man with a little more life experience than most. For him, all kinds of behavioral changes in women are not without reason and are often obvious- but for Karube? Hard to say, but as loyal and optimistic as he is, I think you will have good cards with him at your side.

At least he can see that you're not doing well. The reason doesn't matter at this point, only the fact counts for him and he automatically makes it his goal to see you laughing again, or at least smiling. So, Karube would stay with you in bed, no matter what. Except his visa says he will die tonight, then sorry, we have to let him go for a game ...

Time in bed includes much of cuddles, less talking but much little kisses all over your face, especially when it comes to your forehead and your cheeks. And when you look up to him, he will take the chance putting you a small kiss on the tip of your nose, finally making you giggle a little.

He loves hearing your laugh- most when he is the reason for it.

N i r a g i

I don't know why, but I just can't hate him, help.

The past often plays a major role in how a person develops over the course of their life. Niragi didn't have it easy back then and you are aware of that. But that's also why you're aware that he's not the best person to talk to in cases like this.

You can try to deal with it on your own, but that won't do you any good. And you can't hide anything from him either, which is why he will come up with the idea of visiting you in your room all by himself at some point. When he finds you, he just looks at you in irritation and says things that aren't bad, but in view of your situation … well, let's just say he is not that good with words and he can be happy that you know it.

"Laying in bed all day?" "What's that pout on your face, has someone upset you?" "Come on, let's get moving, the fun is just beginning."

And when you tell him, you are in a bad mood and he should just leave you alone, he is saying something he'll maye regret in just a few seconds ... or minutes ... or never.

"Why are you kicking me out now, are you on your period or-"

Believe me, Niragi IS regreting what he was saying. From that moment on, where you just sat up, gripping one of the pillows next to you, only to immediately throw it at him. Thanks to his reflexes, he is able to catch it- now he is just speechless, staring at you with his mouth, formed as an "o".

"I- ... Gotta get you some snacks."

"You better do, Suguru."

[banamine-bananime]

AITA for trying to save my friend and keep the rest of my asshole friends safe from their bad decisions?

I (M26) just went through this real shitty breakup. So basically, my ex C (M lmao man fuck if i know his age idek if knows it. or has one i guess) has this god-fucking-awful habit of deciding to solve every problem by dying about it and/or fucking off without so much as a word to the people unfortunate enough to give a shit about him, except maybe his sister (unhelpful for the rest of us because she also inherited the "fucking off without a word" gene. man fuck this whole family for making me care about them. whatever). Also, killing himself inside peoples brains thats like a whole hobby for him. like okay either ghost us OR kill yourself in front of us altering the trajectory of our lives forever PICK ONE like a NORMAL person.

Okay wait im not explaining this well. So years ago C and W (M37 now) were partners but C was, uh, in a really bad place mentally (S is telling me this is more diplomatic to say than "crazy af") and that situationship ended as badly as a situationship can end. I mean W's told me he pretty much had his sense of identity as someone separate from C totally destroyed by that for a while, which like, in hindsight its kinda an accidental dick move that our team made him take C's legal identity, but in our defense a) the fuck were we supposed to know?, b) tbf he really did need it not to go back to prison, c) it's not like C was using his identity, on account of the fucking off and effectively-dying-as-a-solution habits, and d) i mean. i gotta admit it's also pretty funny in a really fucked way.

aw shit derailed on a tangent again

recently its just like, we just get so focused on one thing its hard to remember anything else, you know?

S is so good at getting us back on track though. thank god because you would not believe the number of irons weve got in the fire to keep track of, its ridiculous. (i love making my partner be the planner in the relationship lol. highly recommend being a passenger princess in the body sometimes. fuck massages, i'm telling you THIS is what you need after a long day getting shit DONE and taking care of everyone else's messes)

So I met C 6 years ago, right out of basic, when we were privates stationed at the same base. middle of nowhere. shit, this is gonna be hard to explain, just realized i should use different names for C to keep them straight. I knew "A" and W knew "E", i didnt meet E until years later. theyre alters and also the same guy but also not the same guy. dont worry about it if you dont get it bc ive dated both of them and i dont think i do. my life is stupid.

Bunch of bullshit happened, A ghosted (lol. you'd be high-fiving me if you knew him) and then found a problem to solve by dying. you get it by now.

Then i meet E, E encounters a problem and tries to die about it round one (i guess round two, after exploding in W <- LOL. you should be high-fiving me right now), E's sister drags him back to the land of the living, E ghosts, W and i start dating, W tries to martyr himself and disappears because i guess E rubbed off on him (dude i am on a fucking roll. you should be high-fiving me out of pity for my glamorously miserable soap-opera life if nothing else. homophobic not to), our team gets W back, E strolls back like he has no idea why im mad at him, we fight about it, makeup-makeouts about it, and E tries to die about it round two: in my brain boogaloo.

So thats how S and i meet. oops, guess i never introduced S? Feels weird to have to introduce ourself twice, people dont really meet us separately anymore LOL. S (M, ageless) is also C's alter, my partner in life and badassery and brain and body. and obviously freaky sex stuff, that goes without saying but i'm saying it anyway to brag. the swish swish to my stabbing people who really deserve it. Not really interested in your opinion on our relationship, it's not what i'm asking about. we're aware its not conventional, because we're not fucking braindead. Im so sick of all the "oooohhhhh this isn't healthy", "he's a male manipulator and youre codependent i know bc i learned psychology from tiktoks by girls with green hair", "why are you wearing your ex-boyfriend's armor colors while wearing his dead ex-boyfriend's armor while dating and sharing a brain with your dead mutual ex's alter", "have you considered going to therapy instead of a quest against death itself" blah blah blah. If youre so bored you need to judge our life then just get your own 🙄🙄🙄

we've been really on that sigma grindset the last few weeks. S has got our sleep optimized down to a tight triphasic 3.46 hours and we're minmaxing the fuck out of the rest of every day. Biohacked to shit over here. too much to do, so we have to make there be enough of our time to do it. who else is gonna? my teammates? the REDS? we're half batman half babysitter to a gaggle of idiots who can barely be trusted to wipe their own asses, let alone fight their own battles and make decisions like "wah wah wah A is dead let's just give up and cry about it or whatever".

Don't even get me started on W. Oh youre all about character-building wake up and grind self-improvement and taking leadership until we're making decisions you dont like, i guess. WHATEVER. this is why we dont listen to you.

its hard, okay. like, you cant understand the sheer fucking stress were under trying to keep all our plans going smoothly while keeping these guys safe while they're basically actively trying to unravel every carefully-laid thread and also strangle themselves in them. im probably going prematurely grey and also losing some time. its hard to remember when we need to hold back and use the kiddy gloves. i really didnt want to come to holding - uh, we'll call him MC (M25) - by the throat, passed-out. he's like a brother to me, been through thick and fucking thin together, so yeah, i feel really bad about that, my bad, we were the asshole there, but like, maybe stop throwing yourself in the way? like run out into the road you're gonna get hit by a truck no matter how hard they slam the brakes. mfw the conses quence. but im NOT asking about that. everyone's been on our dick about "please god stop doing all of this" and abandoning A and trying to break us up way before that, and THAT'S what im asking about

Anyways tl;dr are we the asshole for getting shit done when it takes methods that all our monday morning quarterback friends dont like

_____

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

it really was a dick move to dangle my teammate's limp body in a chokehold even though it was basically an accident and also not even directly relevant to the question

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might not be the asshole:

okay but we're right

[mulletpermsicantlookaway]

The Jockification of Jeremy, Part 3: Chase Makes His Choice

(For Parts 1 and 2 and the earlier stories this is a sequel to, see the earlier posts.)

I ended up not seeing Chase for nearly two weeks. I had sent him one or two texts. He hadn’t answered them, but he’d read them. I finally sent: “Bro, we need to talk”, and he replied: “I can’t hear you when you speak jockinese”. That made me mad, as I’m sure he wanted, but I realized that he was just lashing out. I felt bad for him, but I still couldn’t make up my mind what to do. I could just give him the Cup and wait for him to start to turn, but I kept remembering Coach Sanders saying that I might not need it. What had he been trying to tell me? I tried to think it through: I hadn’t needed the Cup for myself. Why? Because I had made out with James and Steve, apparently. So, was he telling me that Chase might start to turn into a jock if we made out? Maybe that was what he meant, but the chances of that seemed slim, since Chase wouldn’t even look at me now. And then I suddenly realized that I was overthinking it; the problem was really very simple: was Chase in love with me or not? If he was, then he’d still be in love with me – even though I’d become a jock. And if he wasn’t, then our friendship was over, because the two of us had nothing in common anymore. So I had to find out whether he loved me. And that meant I would have to see him again, whether he wanted to see me or not.

I had thought about asking one of the bros to help. Derek, for example, could easily have just picked Chase up and carried him to me. But that was a stupid idea. Even if it worked, it would just make Chase mad. And this was my problem, not my bros’ problem. If anyone was going to pick Chase up and carry him around, I would be the one to do it; I was getting big enough.

I put everything into one last effort to persuade Chase to see me. I sent him this: “Plz. Gotta talk 2 u just 1nce more. And then will leave u alone if that’s what u want. Plz I need u.”

He replied: “I nu I shd hve blocked u. OK. Will meet. Where?”

“My place.”

My parents were happy to see Chase again, because they hadn’t seen him now for weeks and were wondering why we weren’t friends anymore. I don’t know if they noticed how uncomfortable he looked, but he didn’t linger downstairs. We went right up to my room.

“Okay, Jeremy, what’s the big emergency? What do you need me for? Because I’m not doing homework for you or any other dumb jock, just so you know that.”

“I didn’t ask you here to do my homework, bro, I can do it myself.”

“Yeah, but how well, bro? What’d you get on that last history assignment? A C?”

“A B Minus, actually. I know it wasn’t my best, but I had a basketball game and a wrestling match that week. Anyway, I’m getting my grades back up. I have to anyway. Anything lower than a C-, I get kicked off the team.”

“And that would be a tragedy, that would. What the hell happened to you, Jeremy? Why are you acting like this? I can’t stand jocks. I really can’t. I can’t even look at you. And it smells like a locker room in here. Do you ever wash your jockstraps?”

“Yeah, I do, but I’m a big boy now, and big boys sweat. It’s not a crime, bro.”

“Maybe not, but the stink in here is. Yeah, you’re a big boy all right, Jeremy. I’ll grant you that. You’re about a foot taller than I am now, and judging from how you look in the tank tops and shorts you wear even this time of year, you’ve been packing on the muscle. And the body hair, too.  Geez. Look at you. I guess you’ve turned into your own wet dream, eh, Jeremy? You always did have a thing for jocks. But I still can’t figure out how you turned into one.  Did those neanderthals kidnap you, brainwash you, and pump you full of steroids?”

“I don’t take steroids, bro. Steroids shrink your balls. I think even you know that.”

“Okay, I’ll concede on that point. Even from here, I can tell you don’t have shrunken balls, unless you’ve been stuffing rocks in your jockstrap. Geez, Jeremy, how do walk around with those? And what the eff happened to your dick? It wasn’t like that before.”

“There, bro, you can manage to look at me when you want to. Glad you’re impressed, but I didn’t ask you over here to discuss my package.”

“Then what did you ask me here for, Jeremy? If it wasn’t for me to do your homework or admire the size of your balls, then what did you want from me?”

“This,” I said, pulling him to me and kissing him.

He struggled a bit at first, but I held him firmly, and pretty soon he was giving back as much as he was getting. His tongue pushed hungrily into my mouth. A minute later, though, he pulled away. “Damn it, Jeremy,” he said. “Did you have to do that? You’re big, you’re dumb, and you stink. I can’t. I just can’t.”

I put my hand on his rigid cock, which was tenting his pants, and said, “This is telling a different story, isn’t it Chase? You want to know why I asked you over? To tell you that I love you. I think I always loved you. I missed you so much. And I’m pretty sure you love me, too. Am I right?”

“Damn you,” Chase said, starting to kiss me again. He didn’t come up for air for a couple more minutes. “Fuck. I hate this. You want me to say it, don’t you? Yes, I love you. There. I said it. I think I’ve always loved you. Damn it.”

“But bro, I’m big and dumb, and I stink.”

“Yeah, I know,” said Chase. “And I still love you, you big, hot lunkhead. Although I’m starting to wonder how dumb you really are. You seem to know how to push all of my buttons. Now shut up and let’s get back to work. And stop calling me ‘Bro’!”

We got back to work. For such a little dude with zero experience that I knew of, he gave me a thorough workout. Once he finally got to it, I mean, he just went nuts. It was as if I’d broken some kind of barrier down inside him, and now that it was gone, he couldn’t get enough of me. I couldn’t believe little Chase could be such an animal. When we finally finished, we were both sweating heavily. Chase said, “I’m sorry. I had to do that or I was going to go crazy.”

“You did go crazy, bro. And nothing to be sorry for. I had a great time.”

“I did, too. Damn it. Why, Jeremy? I don’t like jocks.”

“Could’ve fooled me, bro”.

“Yeah, I know. I guess I like this jock. I love you, Jeremy. You were right about that. Well, we’ve certainly had a night. Now are you going to send me packing? Don’t you have a freshman to stuff into a locker or something, or a game to play?”

“Chase, dude, I love you like crazy, but you really need to get over your hate, okay? I’ve changed. I know it hasn’t been easy for you, but you need to be okay with that.”

“I know, Jeremy. I’ve just really been having trouble dealing with you as a jock. I thought I’d lost you forever, and it made me mean. I’m sorry. I know whatever changes you’ve been going through, it’s not your fault, and I haven’t been a good friend to you lately. But it’s hard for me to get used to. You really do smell like jock, you know, and now I’ve got that smell all over me. I feel a little queasy now, honestly.”

“I’m sorry about the jock smell, bro, honestly, I am, but I think you’re going to have to just live with it. I shower, like, every day. Sometimes more than once.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry, too. You’re right; I’ll just have to get used to it. I don’t know. Maybe it’s not so bad. Anyway, if that’s what I have to put up with, I’ll have to put up with it.”

“Bro, you’re sure you’re okay? Your voice is getting kind of hoarse.”

“Still a bit dizzy or whatever, but I feel fine otherwise,” he said, his voice cracking. “My throat’s just a little scratchy.”

I smiled, thinking Chase probably wouldn’t be needing that cup after all. “Bro,” I continued, “I know you’re not exactly interested in going out for a sport right now, but I just wanted to let you know that you owe Coach Sanders a huge favor.”

“Not sure I follow you, Jeremy. Why do I owe Coach Sanders a favor?”

“Because he was the one who told me not to give up on our friendship. Bro, I was so, like, sad that you weren’t talking to me that I went to ask his advice. And he was super nice and super helpful about it, and he made so much sense. And he told me pretty much what you said, bro, about you having trouble dealing with it that I had changed so much so fast. And I asked him to talk to you, and he said he would if I wanted, but that I shouldn’t, you know, underrate our friendship, and I could talk to you better than he could. And he was right.”

“Yeah,” agreed Chase. “He was right. I guess I do owe him a favor, then.”

“Yeah, bro,” I said, kissing Chase again lightly. “Anyway, it’d be great for you to talk to him sometime. He’s a great guy.”

“I’m sure he is, Jeremy. And maybe, maybe, if you value his opinion so much, I can persuade him to get you down to using ‘Bro’ every other sentence.” I pantomimed punching him in the arm and he laughed. “Sorry, Jeremy, but I couldn’t resist that one. It’s okay. But yeah, I’ll talk to him sometime, if it means that much to you.”

“It’s good to hear you laugh again, bro. I’ve missed that.” Then I kissed him again, and we got down to business for another round.

Chase ended up spending the night. It was pure ecstasy for us, because neither of us wanted to be away from the other. But the next morning, we had school, and the alarm was a rude awakening from our blissful night.

Chase said he felt great in the morning, but his voice was so hoarse he could barely talk above a whisper: “Jeremy,” Chase croaked, “I’m going to stink so bad at school. You think I have time for a shower?”

I kissed him again and said, “Don’t shower yet, babe. Please. You smell like me, and I want every guy at school to know you’re mine.”

Chase laughed, “Okay, Jeremy. I guess you marked me as your mate. Just for you, because I love you, I won’t shower until I get home tonight. Anything else you want?”

“Just one more thing, you ever worn a jock, babe? No, of course you haven’t. Here’s one of mine. I want you to wear it to school today.”

“Geez, Jeremy, I mean, that’s sweet, and a little gross, but how is one of your jockstraps going to fit me? It’ll be all stretched out from your monster cock and balls.”

“You’ll see,” I said. “Let me get it on you. You’d be surprised how well these things recover from being stretched out. If it won’t stay on you by itself right now, you just put a pair of briefs over it. Wait, I think I still have a few of my old ones that don’t fit me anymore.” So I positioned one of my used jockstraps over his package and then put a pair of my old briefs over it, and once I got in place, I said, “Now you’ll be able to feel that you’re mine all day long.”

“Ooh, that feels strange. Really strange. But it’s kind of nice. It makes me feel warm and tingly, all over. But I guess I’d better get dressed now.”

Chase kissed me again, and then he started pulling on his pants and shirt from last night. “That’s funny, Jeremy,” he whispered. “My pants are little tight.”

“Well, you’ve got a little extra material there now, bro. I’m sure your pants will stretch out a bit once you’ve had them on for a bit.”

We went to school together, but we didn’t have any classes together until after lunch, so I didn’t see him again until lunchtime. We ate lunch together. Chase was feeling fine, he said, but he was really hungry, and he got seconds, which he never did normally. He was clearing his throat a lot, and when he talked, his voice alternated between sounding hoarse and cracking. To me, his Adam’s apple already looked a little more prominent, but it could have been my imagination. He looked a little sweaty, too, but I said nothing about it.

“Jeremy,” he said, “I just wanted to let you know that I’m trying to get used to the jock smell, I really am, but I feel stinky and sweaty, and I’m really looking forward to a shower.”

“It’s okay, little bro. I just wanted to be sure you and everyone else knew you were mine.”

“Very cute, Jeremy. But I keep thinking your jock friends are staring at me.”

Chase had a point; some of them did seem to be staring, particularly James and Steve, who looked over several times.

“Don’t worry about my bros, babe,” I said. “No one’s going to mess with you now that you’re my boyfriend.”

But I was curious as to what James and Steve were talking about; they were clearly having a couple chat that no one else was in on.

After school, I had basketball practice. Before practice, I swung by Coach Sanders’s office to return the cup and thank him again. He was at his desk. I closed the door and said, “Coach, I wanted to thank you so much for helping me with Chase. I ended up not needing this, so I wanted to get it back to you.” I handed him the cup.

He said nothing until he had carefully put the cup back into the same file drawer he’d retrieved it from originally, and then he said, “So, big guy, how’d things go?”

“Awesomely. You were right about trusting our friendship, Coach. I think I’d been in love with him for a long time, and I told him so, and it turned out he was in love with me, too. Now we’re officially boyfriends, and I couldn’t be happier.”

“Love’s a powerful thing, Jeremy. I’m glad for you. So, Chase is dealing with your changes better now?”

“Definitely, Coach. And, if I’m right, he’ll probably be ready to talk to you about joining up in a week or two.”

The coach chuckled. “Big guy, if you were smiling any harder, I think your face would split. Okay, Jeremy, I can read between the lines. We’ll keep an eye on Chase and make sure he turns out all right.”

“Thanks, Coach. I owe you a lot.”

“You’re welcome, Jeremy. I owe you a lot, too.”

I didn’t see Chase again that night, but we texted. Other than his voice, he was feeling fine. The next morning at school, James lumbered up behind me, reached up, and clasped a meaty hand on my shoulder: “Sup, bro. Why don’t we take a walk to my office. It’s time for another counseling session.” He had one of those one-eyebrow-raised jock smirks on his face, so it was hard to tell if he was amused or irritated. I followed him to the most out-of-the way men’s room in the school. No one was inside.

“Haven’t been in here for a while. Brings back memories – sort of.” I looked at him, puzzled, and he sighed. “Never mind. It’s just that this place has seen a few interesting scenes in my life, bro, but that’s another story. If these walls could talk! I’m just glad I didn’t have to kick any nerds out of here this time. We need a little privacy.”

“What’s up, James? Why’d you bring me here? I’m confused.”

“You do seem to have that problem sometimes, bro. Were you a little dense before you changed, or did you lose a few IQ points in the process?  Anyway, the last time you and I talked, we were talking about your future. But you’re not a little bro anymore, not at all. You’ve turned out fine. No, it’s not your future I’m worried about. Steve-o and I noticed your little friend at lunch. What’s his name? Chase? So, what’s going on with your little friend, Chase, bro?”

“Something wrong with him, bro?” I asked, as innocently as I could.

“You do like to push your luck, don’t you? I’m still a lot bigger than you are. And, unlike some of our bros, I’m not stupid, and neither is Steve. I’m starting to suspect you’re not as dumb as you come off, either.”

“Your point, dude?”

“I’m getting there,” James continued with a glare. “Patience is a virtue, bro. I don’t know what all you know or may have heard about Steve and me and some of the stuff that used to go on around here. Let me just tell you that I have plenty of experience seeing nerds and geeks turn into jocks. I can recognize the signs sooner than most. Don’t hold out on me, bro. I’m not asking because I’m nosy. There might be more involved than you know about. So, give. What happened to Chase? Why is he starting to turn?”

“He’s my boyfriend, bro. That’s what happened. He and I had been in love since, like, forever, but he was having trouble with me being a jock. Anyway, we reconciled the night before last.”

James’s smirk deepened. “Oh, that’ll be fun. Too much fun. That is fucking awesome! I’ve got to say, bro, I suspected something like that. Look, it really wouldn’t be any of my business, except that I want to make sure your little bro Chase is okay. Protocol is, as you know, that we only hang around with other bros, so you and Chase were attracting some attention. You don’t need to give me a play-by-play, but he already looks like he’s turning fast. You did that just by making out with him?”

“Well, yeah, bro. I mean, we did it – a lot – that first night. And I did talk him into wearing one of my jockstraps. I think it helps. I, uh, wore that one of yours for over a week, I think.”

“Kind of hard to remember stuff from before, isn’t it bro?” said James softly. “It was Steve’s, by the way, not that it really matters. We knew it was Steve you really wanted to make out with. I don’t blame you; he is incredibly hot, after all. Look, bro, I know it doesn’t matter now, but you have to realize that we had no idea that making out with us was going to make you turn. We just wanted you to have some fun – and leave us alone.”

“Bro, seriously, it’s okay. I’m super happy with my life. I mean, I know I used to be different, but now I can’t really remember what I was like before. I mean, I remember my life and all the facts and all that, but I can’t remember what it felt like, you know?”

“Yeah, I do know, actually,” James said, almost in a whisper. “Your old life is like a dream you barely remember, and every day it fades a bit more, because you were always like this, and that dream, bro, it never happened.”

“Yeah, it’s exactly like that,” I said, excitedly. But James sighed; he was looking away from me toward his reflection in the mirror. His smirk was gone, and his face was utterly blank. I was a bit disconcerted, but I continued, “And Chase, well, I didn’t know what would happen, but I figured that, since we loved each other so much, it would turn out okay no matter what. But dude, we made out so many times that night, and by morning, I could already tell he was starting to change. So I figured, okay then, we’ll just be another hot jock couple like you and Steve.”

“Yeah, I suppose you will be at that, bro,” James said, his customary smirk pointed at me again. “Other people will start noticing soon. You’ll want to keep a close eye on him for now. And talk to one of the coaches, probably Sanders, the basketball coach. He was the one Derek talked to about you. Sanders was around when all this stuff started going on, and he must know something. I’ll bet Halvorson, the wrestling coach, does, too.  The football coach, you know, the new one, don’t go to him. He’s a great coach and all, but he doesn’t know anything about this kind of, um, special case.”

“All taken care of, bro. I had already talked to Coach Sanders about Chase, and I talked to him again yesterday before practice. He was the one who encouraged me to reconcile with Chase in the first place, and I’m glad I did.”

“Interesting, bro, very interesting. He actually encouraged you to reconcile with Chase? I’m surprised. Pleasantly, but surprised. I don’t know Coach Sanders, really. I’m not on the basketball team, and I’ve never really talked to him, but I’m glad he isn’t a homophobe. That was one of the problems with the old football coach. So, I’m assuming Coach Sanders must have some or all of the old football coach’s videos.”

“Yeah, bro, I watched one of those, and he said he had some of the old coach’s stuff, just not all of it. I asked him if the video would help Chase, and he told me it would, but I might need something special to help as well. But I ended up not needing it, so I gave it back to him.”

“Whoa, dude,” said James. “What the fuck! You don’t mean he actually still has…”  James leaned right into my face and whispered so softly I almost couldn’t hear him. “Does Sanders actually still have a cup? Is that what he gave you?”

“Yeah, bro, that’s what he gave me,” I whispered back.

I’d almost never seen James look anything but cocky, but whatever was going through his head had wiped the usual smirk off his face again. His eyes were as round as basketballs. “No shit,” he finally said, quietly. “Steve-o and I thought they were all long gone, along with the old football coach. And Sanders still has one?”

“Bro,” I whispered. “I know he told me not to talk about this at all, but I think he said they had very few left, so doesn’t that mean there must be more than one?”

“Holy shit,” said James. “Okay, bro, do not, I repeat, do not, say a word about any of this to anyone. Absolutely not. And don’t let on to Coach Sanders that you told me. The less you know about those things the better. Bro, I am so glad you didn’t have to use one of those on Chase. What you two did was a lot more fun, for you and for him, and if all goes well, little Chase will never know what hit him.” He paused. “We’re done with our discussion, bro, but, just out of curiosity, do you remember any of the video Coach Sanders had you watch?”

“Well, I remember that it was really good, and I enjoyed it, but no, I don’t honestly remember what it was about. Why?”

“Professional curiosity. I’m studying biology, not that I exactly bring that up at practice with the bros. But I’m curious about the process – if you follow me. I think, bro, that it’s not just one video that you watched. I think there’s more than one, and I’m not sure if we all see the same ones or not. But that’s just a feeling I have. I have zero evidence, and I can’t remember any more of the video than you do. I’ll be curious to find out if Chase remembers anything when his turn comes. Speaking of coming,” he said with a chuckle, “Make sure you get him to come as soon as you can, you know, after he’s done. It’ll help him finish adjusting. He’ll probably be super horny anyway, but it he’s not, get him horny, okay, bro?”

“Okay, bro,” I said with a grin. “That’ll be a pleasure. But what’s so bad about those cups, anyway?”

“Look, bro, forget about the cups. Just be very, very glad you never had to wear one. Trust me.” And with that he left.

To be continued

[ec1ips3]

-;༉‧₊˚✧ 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐞

⚡︎ pairing: jj maybank x fem!reader

⚡︎ summary: you and jj aren’t friends, the thought of being friends felt so foreign. after some arguments, boy troubles, and years of yearning and aruging, the idea doesn’t seem so foreign. 

⚡︎ warning: angst, mean jj, you’re a kook, i know that’s clique but i love kook!reader, swearing, she/her pronouns, not proofread, underage drinking, cheating, abandonment issues mentioned, mention of blood, fluff if you squint.

⚡︎ word count: 21, 284

⚡︎ a/n: hi everyoneeee! hope you’re all doing amazing. I decided to write some jj in honor of the new outer banks season i have yet to watch (because of jiara). also i’m guessing this takes place before season 2 because no cleo :(. BUT there is always a next time :). Also im sorry this is so long, i kept writing and i just kept adding and adding and adding, got too into it. also sorry this was late, but it’s okay because i think i wrote the best kissing scene i’ve ever written. Anyway like always, requests and taglist are always open. happy reading! <;33

masterlist | jj’s masterlist | taglist

“If you do it like that, you could break it” JJ complained.

“JJ, I did it the exact way you do it, get over it” You respond.

“Can you two stop acting like children?” Kie pleads.

You and JJ never got along. There was no real valid reason, not that you know of. You started hanging out with the pogues when Sarah and John B got together. She insisted one day you come with her so she actually has someone to talk to because there was still tension with Kie. You agreed because you wanted to help her, but one time turned into a second visit, then it became going every time Sarah went, or when Kie had called you to come over. 

It wasn’t like you stepped on JJ’s foot when he was younger, or that you acted cruel towards him like all the other kooks. JJ Maybank just hated you. Your face, your smile, your voice, your presence. He hated you. And he always made sure you knew he hated you.

It wasn’t like you stepped on JJ’s foot when he was younger, or that you acted cruel towards him like all the other kooks. JJ Maybank just hated you. Your face, your smile, your voice, your presence. He hated you. And he always made sure you knew he hated you.

It wasn’t like you stepped on JJ’s foot when he was younger, or that you acted cruel towards him like all the other kooks. JJ Maybank just hated you. Your face, your smile, your voice, your presence. He hated you. And he always made sure you knew he hated you.

JJ would always pick up stupid little arguments about anything. If you reacted in any sort of way he didn’t like, you wouldn’t hear the end of it. If you wanted to surf you were told you didn’t know how to. And you always fed into it.

“Y/n please, you two have been going at this all day on hms pogue,” Sarah says rubbing her head, hoping to soothe her headache from the arguing. 

“I’m curious JJ, what is my place here? Kook Princess?” You remind yourself of JJ’s comment earlier.

“You may be all high and mighty in kooklandia, but here, you’re a bottom feeder”

The both of you continue to argue, everyone on the poor boat having to listen to the both of you go back and forth. In the beginning, you ignored JJ and his remarks, he was furious when Sarah brought you the first time. He was already unhappy when John B brought one kook princess, but another one was his limit. 

You understood why JJ didn’t like you at first, you were a kook, people that treated people like him like garbage, he didn’t know who you were as a person.

But as you slowly showed up more often, JJ just seemed more annoyed with you. He hasn’t even tried to have one genuine conversation with you, he’s never said anything remotely nice to you, and he hasn’t made any friendly gesture towards you. After a while, you had reached your own limit. You were no longer able to just sit and frown as he said mean things to you, you started to defend yourself.

When John B finally docked the boat at the Chateau you were the first one off the boat thanking him once you landed and walking straight into the small house. You were hoping that Sarah or even Pope had been the one behind you but you knew it was too good to be true when you heard his voice again.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks following you.

“I’m getting away from you so you could stop annoying me” you roll your eyes.

“I wasn’t done talking to you,” JJ said.

“I was,” you say, plopping yourself on the couch, massaging your temple from the headache JJ had caused you.

“J, just let the girl be” Pope defended you, sitting next to you.

“Are you seriously on her side? When she was pulling the anchor chain, she was pulling it too close to us. She would’ve had to get us a new boat” JJ reminds him as everyone else walks in too.

“Like you wouldn’t have liked a new boat with my money” you grumbled.

“You mean daddy’s money,” JJ said. 

“JJ” Kie called him out.

“Am I wrong? It isn’t even her money. It’s the money daddy gives her. She doesn’t even do anything for it, she just has it” he continues.

“Oh, shut the fuck up JJ. You never stop talking about me or my family for more than 10 minutes” you stand up, visibly getting angrier.

“Yeah right kook princess, just like how you never-” 

“That’s enough!” John B cuts Jj off before he could finish. The room was now silent.

It always annoyed John B and Sarah how much you and JJ argue. JJ was like John B’s brother just like you’re just like Sarah’s sister. Seeing two people they loved argue really ruined their moods and sometimes they even had arguments about the two of you arguing. 

It wasn’t like John B didn’t like you, he did really like you. When Sarah would show up to a pogue thing, he would always ask for you, you were really easy to talk to, and you always looked out for him and his friends. JJ included. There were times when you had to pay for things for everyone, times when John B needed a little extra money for food, and even having to bail JJ out of jail. And you were always there to help and talk. 

JJ liked Sarah. That was it. She makes John B happy and that’s all that really matters to him. She always treats his friends right and makes them happy too. JJ is started to warm up more to Sarah and is beginning to have an actual conversation with him now. His only problem with Sarah is that she brings you around.

“I’m so sick and tired of the arguing today. Pope, JJ, and I will stay here. Ladies, do whatever you want, I don’t care. Just take her, away from him and we will all be happy” John B points to you and JJ when he says your name, his arms folded once he’s done.

“Yes! That’s a great idea. We could eat at the Wreck. I’m starving” Sarah jumps in, looking at you with the hope that you’ll agree.

“My dad did ask about you last time,” Kie told you, trying to convince you.

You didn’t need convincing. The second John B had said you and JJ needed to be apart, you would’ve done anything. 

“That isn’t fair. I’m hungry too” JJ complained.

“I will gladly leave,” you say.

“Perfect” Sarah sighs, walking to John B as a Bye and see you later.

You wave to Pope and John B who wave back, not indicating if you were coming back or not. The three of you left in Sarah’s car as she was the one who picked you up and drove to the Wreck.

The minute you stepped foot into the vehicle, there was a large weight lifted off of your shoulders. And when you stepped foot into the restaurant, your entire mood changed from annoyed to happy. Maybe it was the atmosphere, but Sarah and Kie are convinced it’s because you are now completely away from JJ.

The three of you strike up a random conversation, you not wanting to even think about the boy who changed the mood for you. After Kie gets your table’s food from the kitchen and you’re all eating is when someone just had to bring him up.

“Maybe you were just hangry when you had that argument with JJ” Sarah starts, and you roll your eyes.

“Or maybe, JJ is just annoying”

“She isn’t wrong, JJ is very annoying” Kie backs you up.

“Yeah but, Y/n. It’s JJ. You can always ignore him” Sarah says.

“If I ignore him he thinks it’s okay to do it. When I talk back he still thinks it’s okay, but he knows that I’m able to defend myself. That within himself already angers him” you say, sipping on your drink.

“I don’t know, maybe you guys just need to have sex,” Kie says plainly.

“Kie!” you and Sarah say at the same time.

“I’m serious. What if all this fighting is just both of you sexually frustrated with each other? Instead of taking each other’s clothes off, you argue with each other” Kie explains herself.

“I would rather get gum in my hair,” you say, biting a fry.

You would be lying if you said you didn’t find JJ attractive. Hell, everyone in, even Rafe did. 

Before you met him, you just liked to look from afar. When you did, you thought maybe if you were nice enough something would blossom. But nothing ever did, just hatred towards you. Maybe that’s why you never could actually hate JJ as much as you disliked him. Maybe it’s the way he laughs, the way he shakes his head like a dog when he gets out of water. Maybe his pretty privilege gives him a pass.

“Her idea doesn’t actually sound too bad,” Sarah says as she thinks about it more.

“Sarah!” you say.

“Think about it. What if one day you and JJ just fuck, do you think you’ll continue to fight?” Sarah asks.

“I don’t want to think about fucking JJ, thank you very much” you respond, going back to eating. After that statement and a few laughs from the table, Sarah strikes up a new conversation. 

Kie took this time to take other tables, every 20 minutes going back to your table to include herself in the conversation. As she was sitting this time, she noticed something, or rather someone.

Kie kicked your food under the table.

“Ow. What was that for?” you complain.

“Don’t look now but that guy behind you is totally checking you out” Kie says, still looking at the guy.

You did the only thing any reasonable person would and looked back, Sarah following suit. When you looked back a boy was looking at you. With light brown hair and blue eyes, he blushed and looked at his friends after you looked at him. He was really cute, like really really cute.

“I told you not to look back” Kie laughed.

“Yeah and I’m glad I did anyway. He’s cute” You say.

“You could always just, talk to him. Maybe get his number” Sarah suggested.

“Yeah right, he’s probably some guy that’s staying for the weekend, I’ll pass. Can you take me home now” You look at Sarah, her eyebrows knit together.

“You aren’t coming back?” she asks, you shake your head.

You were having a good time, going back to where he was would just ruin your mood. So to not risk it, you wanted to go home.

“To spare everyone from an even harder headache, I’ll stay home. I have things to do anyway” you say.

“You mean binge-watch ‘You’ and obsess over Joe Goldberg again” Kie calls you out.

“I can fix him” you respond.

“He’s a serial killer!” Kie responds

The table laughs until Sarah finally agrees, Kie going with her to drop you off at home. You do exactly what Kie said you would do, it’s a little boring but, it’s better than arguing with someone. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

You’re scrolling on your phone when you hear your doorbell ring frantically. Since no one else was home, you take your phone with you as you quickly run down the stairs to open the door. When you open the door, you weren’t expecting Kie.

“Y/n, you have to come. Sarah got stung by a jellyfish” she said frantically

“Wait what, how? Why are you even here shouldn’t you be-” Kie cut you off before you could even finish your sentence.

“She wants you to pee on her. Just put on your shoes and come!” Kie tried pulling you out of the door but you took a step back. “Give me a second,” you said quickly getting your shoes from the side and holding them in your hand until you get in her car.

Kie drove you to the Chateau when she held your hand to the back you already saw Pope and John B on HMS Pogue. 

If John B was here, why did Sarah need you? “Wait, John B? Where’s Sarah?” you ask, getting on the boat, Pope holding your’s and Kie’s hand. 

“She’s on her dad’s. But she insisted we leave to get you to pee on her” John B explained.

“But you’re literally her boyfriend” you respond, confused.

“She said something about how ‘boy pee is dirtier than girl pee’” Pope said, you rolled your eyes. That is something Sarah would say. 

Eventually, John B pulled up next to Sarah’s boat. JJ was nowhere to be found, you had assumed he would be on the boat with Sarah to keep her company. But it was only her and her painful moans in the water.

You get on Sarah’s boat and you try to lift her, “Y/n, you’re here to pee on me” Sarah said cheerfully. 

You rolled your eyes, “I’m not peeing on you Sarah, I’m taking you to the doctor which should’ve been done when you first got stung” you said, sending daggers to John B’s eyes. 

“But you know that you can pee on someone to take the stinging away,” Sarah says leaning against you.

“I don’t even think that’s true but whatever helps you sleep at night,” you say walking to the edge of the boat so John B could take Sarah, who gracefully does his job. 

Once you hand Sarah off you hear banging, and when you look back the cockpit door is moving rapidly. The loud banging with the moving door only makes you more confused. 

“Sarah… Is there someone here?” you ask, expecting some sort of answer. But all you heard was the motor and silence. “Sarah?” you look back where John B’s boat should be but it isn’t there. 

Your eyes go wide, you see them slowly boat away. “Sorry Y/n, I still love you!” Sarah called out from the boat. She still loves you? What does she mean by-

You couldn’t even finish your thought before the cockpit door opens, but someone comes out quickly. When you see the familiar blond hair you want to curl into a ball and never come out again. 

JJ notices you, his eyes wide. He mumbles something under his breath before he goes to where you are and looks at his friends. “What the fuck?!” He yells at them.

“We’re tired of the arguing! We’ll come back in the morning for the both of you” Kie said.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me” you groaned.

JJ looked at you for a second, then back at his friends. He groans loudly, louder than you which already annoys you.

“They’re kidding right, they’re not actually gonna leave us here?” you ask him, JJ just rolls his eyes at you. “Yeah dumbass, they are. We did it to Kie and Sarah once” JJ told you, he sighed and walked away from you, pinching the bridge of his nose.

You suck your teeth and look where your friends were. But when you felt the familiar something in your shorts you squealed loudly. JJ looked back at you to see what made you so excited. But when you pulled out your phone that was when he got angrier. 

“It isn’t gonna work,” JJ tells you.

“You don’t know that Sarah’s boat should have wifi” 

“I do know that and she doesn’t. Remember she said something about how it never works when it’s away from her house.” JJ rolled his eyes.

When you stood up and raised your phone in the air you cursed yourself. He was right, it wasn’t working. You remember Sarah and Kie laughing about when the pogues did it to them. You had hoped that maybe this would help you and JJ. With that being said instead of trying to make an actual conversation with you, JJ pulls a joint out of his pocket, lights it up, and puts it to his lips before he could even offer it if you wanted.

Even if you rejected his offer, it would’ve shown he was actually trying. You roll your eyes and go down to where you and Sarah usually sleep when you sleep over on the boat. If he wasn’t going to make the effort, why should you? You thought.

You entertained yourself with the games on your phone that didn’t need wifi for a couple of minutes. Then minutes turned into hours when your phone died and you hadn’t seen JJ since you left him. You know he’s hungry because you’re hungry so as much as you dread it, you decide to put an end to the arguing.

You took some chips out of your and Sarah’s secret stash and left the small room. When you walk out the first thing that hits your nose is weed. You walk to the middle of the boat just to find him on the edge of it, smoking a joint, looking in the distance. You walked a little harder so JJ could recognize you were around, and he did, looking back at you. You threw him the chips. 

“I know you’re hungry, consider this a piece offering,” You say, opening your bag and taking out a chip to bite. 

JJ just looked at his chip bag and scoffed, he threw it back at your feet. “I don’t want it,” he said lowly. You roll your eyes, of course, he’s acting like a child. 

“Look, I don’t want to do this as much as you but we should at least give it a try. Us arguing is ruining our friendship with everyone else.” You explain to him

JJ laughed loudly, “you mean you’re ruining your relationship with everyone” 

“Excuse me”

“You heard me. Maybe if you weren’t so annoying you wouldn’t be ruining those friendships, but you are” JJ says 

You’re speechless for a second thinking of what to say before you actually say it. “Last time I check JJ it takes two people to hold an argument. I’m not the only annoying one” 

“Sorry, Princess but that’s all you. Maybe if you didn’t act like a kook you would be able to realize how annoying you are”

“Is that the only reason you don’t like me? Because I’m a kook? That’s real childish of you, JJ” 

JJ stood up at the word childish, getting close to you. “Then so be it, but at least I act like my true self,” he says

“What are you even talking about? I didn’t ask to be a kook, I can’t control that” you defend yourself.

“Yeah but you control who you choose or who not to be friends with,” JJ says, venom rolling off his tongue.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you knew exactly what he meant, you just wanted him to say it.

“You’re a princess who lives in this big castle, everyone caters to you. You can do no wrong, everyone loves you. But you chose to befriend the ones everyone looks down upon. It’s fucking weird and fake” JJ says, raising his voice slightly.

“So you hate me because I’m friends with your friends instead of some random kooks?” 

“No, I hate you because you are you. You’re a spoiled brat who uses daddy’s money to get closer to us. You act so innocent like you don’t know what you’re doing but you do! I don’t know why you’re friends with us Y/n but I know that when Daddy is no longer upset at you, you’ll go crawling back to your kook friends” JJ said, every word he said hurting you slightly more, and more.

“You don’t even know me,” you say angrily.

“And I don’t want to. Think about it. When it was just Sarah, everything was perfectly fine. No one was ever begging someone to stop arguing, we were always happy and laughing. That all changed when Sarah decided to bring you around. You changed everything!”

You were speechless, your mouth slightly wide, your eyebrows furrowed together. JJ has never yelled at you once, so seeing him do it now only made you feel pain. To think you actually liked this guy, to think you tried to befriend him. And all of it was for nothing.

JJ took your silence as an opportunity to go further. “You changed everything! And you changed everything for the worse! Do you actually think we enjoy being with you? Do you really think Pope doesn’t care when you ask him multiple questions? Do you really think Kie doesn’t hate it when you bring up something from the kook academy? Do you really think John B likes you? He only puts up with you because of Sarah. They all only put up with you because of Sarah! So get a grip, stop trying to be my friend, and leave my friends alone!”

The sound of his echoes was the only thing heard. Your eyes began to water. You knew he was wrong, if he wasn’t they would’ve all said something to you or Sarah. But there was a small part of you that believed him. 

JJ had only realized what he said once he noticed your entire face go pale. Like all the life and the spirit you had in you was gone instantly. He felt bad, he didn’t mean the words he said. He was angry, he wanted you to stay away from him. He never wanted to ruin you, when he first saw you, that was his one wish for himself. But he did it anyway.

“Y/n… I’m sorry I didn’t- I didn’t mean it. I- I was just saying-”

“It’s okay, I get it,” you said softly, it’s so soft and quiet. He’s never heard you be this quiet and he never wants to hear you this quiet ever again.

“No, this isn’t-” he took a step closer to you and you took two steps back. “Y/n…”

You wipe the tears that fall, “I’m gonna go back inside the cabin. Have a nice night JJ” you said even quieter than before.

“I’m sorry. Y/n I didn’t mean any of it, you gotta believe me” JJ pleaded with you. You couldn’t look him in the eyes, you knew if you did you would only cry more.

 “Yeah JJ. I believe you” you said, looking at him for a second, just a second. Once you do you quickly turn away, walking to the cabin.

JJ didn’t stop you, he wanted to. He didn’t want to make you cry, he never wanted to even see you cry. He ran his fingers through his hair and grabbed the ends of it. He felt like an idiot. He sat down, the unopened bag of chips next to him. He looked at it and shook his head, getting angrier with himself.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

The sunlight fell onto your face, waking you up. Your eyes were tired from all of the crying you did last night. You had a massive headache. Your voice felt so small. Everything from last night made you want to go back to sleep and stay in that cabin for the rest of your life, but you knew that wouldn’t be possible. 

You walked out of the cabin and saw a small bag of chips at the door, the bag of chips you gave him. You throw it back into the cabin and you didn’t even try to look for him. You were on the edge waiting for your friends to come back. 

You finally saw a small white dot in the distance, sighing with relief. But that sigh was too soon because you felt the new presence behind you. The HMS Pogue was getting closer and neither of you said a word. Not until it was almost there that JJ had broken the silence.

“I’m really sorry Y/n. I shouldn’t have said any of those things to you because they all aren’t true.”

You stood up and looked at him, “it’s okay JJ. You won’t have to worry about me anymore” you say, looking at the HMS Pogue.

“What?” his blue eyes filled with confusion.

“I’ll stay away from you and your friends. Just so everyone can be happy like they were before me”

“Y/n” was all JJ said when he heard Kie’s voice.

“Did everything go as planned?” she asked. The both of you were silent.

You had climbed down to the HMS Pogue with the help of Pope, both you and JJ silent as ever. 

“Guess not” John B mumbled, climbing onto Sarah’s boat with Sarah. 

“Why are you getting here?” JJ asked. 

“Well, I need my boat back. So John B and I were gonna drive it back to my house and Pop was gonna take the pogue boat and drive to my house in the twinkie to pick us up. You can join John B and me if you want” Sarah offered JJ.

He looked at you who was looking at the ground below you. So quiet you were. JJ nodded, walking away from the edge of Sarah’s boat.

“Pope, can you drive me home before you pick them up? My mom is probably freaking out about where I was last night” you ask him, your eyes soft and the presence you held within them so small.

“Uhm, yeah. Sure, Of course” Pope nodded, starting the HMS Pogue. 

“Uh, we’ll see you guys later,” Kie told John B and Sarah.

“See you later,” Sarah said, but she only looked at you.

The boat ride to the Chateau was the quietest it’s ever been in. You, Pope, and Kie got in the twinkie shortly after docking and just like he said, Pope took you home first. Not without a bye of course.

When you walked into your house, your mother was already waiting for you in the kitchen. After your long minutes of scolding and your punishment of not going outside unless asked to for a week, you went to your room. To do what you did in the cabin. Cry your eyes out.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

The week’s punishment wasn’t bad. You actually enjoyed it. You had an excuse for Sarah and Kie when they asked to hang out. But once the week was up you gave every excuse in the books to not go. You told JJ you would stay away from them, and you are. 

You would be lying if you said it wasn’t lonely, it was very lonely. You were so used to being with them almost every day that now your day just feels empty. And poor Sarah. You would talk to her every day, there wasn’t one time when you weren’t with or texting her. You didn’t tell her what happened on the boat after she asked. You didn’t want their image of JJ to disappear.

JJ was also going through it. Ever since what happened on the boat JJ was quieter than usual, it made the rest of the pogues worry. He also hadn’t told them what happened on the boat mainly because he knew you weren’t going to.

Every time the pogues brought you up JJ just felt guilty. He knows he is the reason why you aren’t showing up anymore, and in a way, the pogues know it too. JJ didn’t know what to do, he wanted to talk to you but he didn’t know if he should actually go to your house. He had a feeling you would just ignore him and tell him to leave. JJ felt helpless, he didn’t know how to clean up the mess he created.

When you woke up this morning you did your usual routine, mainly just sulking. When you went to eat your breakfast though your mom asked to run some errands for her. You asked her why she couldn’t do it and she reminded you that you haven’t been outside in a while, to soak up some sun. 

She was right though, you hadn’t been out since Pope dropped you off. You agreed to run the errands. You got upstairs and decided to try to look decent since you’ve just been in pajamas. Once you were done and looked at yourself in the mirror you felt more like yourself, maybe you felt even a little happier. 

You went in your car to do the things your mom told you to do, playing your music and you felt better than when you first woke up in the morning. You went to the flower shops, you went to your mom’s office to grab something, you went to the grocery store, and the last place you had to go to was Heywards. You saved that for last because you know Pope is usually with his dad, sometimes JJ and John B even helping for extra cash.

Once you walked in Mr. Heyward already smiled at you. “Y/n, how are you doing? Long time no see”

“Mr. Heyward, I’m alright. How are you? How’s Mrs. Heyward” 

“Oh, she’s doing great. You know you could just call me Heyward, Y/n. Mr. Heyward makes me feel old” you both laugh. “What brings you here?” he asks, the smile still on his face. 

“My mom had made an order a couple of days ago she said, I’m just here to pick it up and pay”

“I’ll get right on that” He starts to walk away but he pauses and looks back “You know, the rest of them have been around a couple of times and I haven’t seen you. Pope hasn’t even mentioned you in a while. I guess what I’m letting you know is that they miss having you around” 

“Oh” was your only response, you didn’t know what to say. It felt nice knowing that they miss you, but it pains you to know they still want you around. 

“I’ll get your order now. I’ll be with you right now sir” Mr. Heyward said to someone behind you and walked away quickly.

You looked behind you once he left, and it was a guy behind you. Light brown hair and blue eyes. He looked familiar but you didn’t know from where. When you looked back at him it was like his interest had peaked, once you smiled at him and he returned one you turned away. 

There was an awkward silence between the two of you but Mr. Heyward came out quickly with a bag. “Here you go, that’ll be 67.95,” he said. You gave him a hundred-dollar bill. “You can keep the change Mr. Heyward” you smiled.

Mr. Heyward thanked you and you grabbed the bag walking to your car now. You put the bag in the backseat on the driver’s side but when you shut the door the boy that was inside was walking towards you.

“Hi, I don’t want to take too much of your day. I don’t know if you remember me but I saw you t that one restaurant, you were with your friends, two girls.” He says, you jog your memories and it pops up.

“Yes! I was wondering why you looked so familiar. I remember now, what’s up” you give him a gentle smile.

“Well, I was with my friends there too. And they noticed I was looking at you and they wanted me to ask you out. I kinda chickened out and when you left I thought I wasn’t going to see you again. But now that I have, I think it’s a sign to take my chance. So are you willing to maybe, go on a date with me? You could say no of course but I wouldn’t mind a yes either” he gives you a dazzling smile. He was cute. You haven’t been on a date in forever and you don’t have friends to make plans with. The worst that could happen is the date doesn’t go well.

“Yeah, sure. I’d love to”

The boy smiles wider, “great. That’s perfect uhm- Sorry I thought you would say no” he says, sounding suddenly out of breath. You giggle at him. You pull out your phone and pull up to add to contacts, giving it to him.

“Give me your number and I’ll give you mine. Just text me the details and it’s a date” you say, the boy gives you his phone quickly. You put your phone number and put your name down, then you texted yourself a little message before giving the phone back.

“Oh, I’m Jayden by the way,” the boy says. 

“Y/n” you respond, walking to open your car door. “I’ll see you around Jayden” you opened the door. 

“Likewise, I’ll get right on with the details,” Jayden says, you nod and he walks away a smile on both of your faces. 

You enter your car and drive home in a much better mood, you needed this. A cute date with a cute guy. This could lead to absolutely nothing or maybe just a short fling, you didn’t mind either. Maybe this could help you take your mind off of the pogues.

But the pogues wouldn’t take their mind off of you. Especially not anymore. Pope was outside of Heyward’s and watched when you first pulled up to his dad’s business. Not only that but his dad mentioned you were there. Pope saw you walk out and saw a guy he’s never seen before walk up to you. He watched as you listened to what the boy was saying and he saw when you gave him your number.

He didn’t know when he was gonna bring it up but he knew he would tell the rest of them. There was a part of him that felt like it wasn’t anyone’s business, to just leave you alone. But then he reminded himself how much everyone is moping around, maybe this will be a clue.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

Some time has passed since you were at Heyward’s. A month to be exact. 

You were happier than the month prior. The date with Jayden went so well you had another one not long after. Then you started hanging out more and more. Then he kissed you. Not long after he asked you to be his girlfriend.

You felt like it was too short, you hadn’t known him for long and he was already asking you to be his girlfriend. But you accepted anyway.

It’s been almost two months since the last time you saw the pogues. Almost two months since you saw Sarah. God, you missed her. You wanted to tell her all about Jayden, you wanted to have a girls’ day with her and Kie. You wanted to be with the pogues. You wanted to laugh like you used to, you wanted to surf with people who knew how to, and you wanted to feel fun again.

Jayden introduced you to his friends after the second date. Neither he nor his friends lived in the Outer Banks, they all lived on the mainland. They usually came out here for the summer but the commute from there to the mainland wasn’t long, so the relationship was doable when summer is over.

His friends, Austin, Rafael, Kolton, and Garrett are nice, they engage in conversations with you. The girls, April, Diana, and Alana didn’t bother you. They seemed to like you, always finding something to compliment you with. This group of friends was so much different than the one you were so familiar with. The pogues felt like a family, this one was separated into two, the boys and the girls. Everyone spoke to each other but you knew there was something deeper inside the group, a secret not everyone knew about.

You’ve mainly just been with Jayden and his friends, going to one of their house parties a couple of times. It wasn’t like the keggers but it did help you forget about the people you’d rather be with.

You were now getting ready to pick up Jayden to go to Rafael’s house, doing a light amount of makeup since you’ll be in his pool. You hear a knock on your door, you tell your mom she can come in. Your back is turned away from the door so when you hear it close followed by silence you look back. The person you didn’t expect to see was Sarah.

“Sarah… What are you.. What are you doing here?” you ask.

“Are you serious right now, Y/n?” Sarah said she is visibly angry.

You close your eyes and breathe out, once you opened them Sarah didn’t wait for a second to continue to speak.

“I haven’t seen you in almost two months. You haven’t texted me back in a week and a half to hang out with you and every time you do text back it’s some stupid excuse. I try calling you, Kie has tried calling you, hell, even John B has tried calling you to come over. I have to show up at your house unannounced and lie to your mom about being here and why she hasn’t seen me in so long. And your first words to me are asking me what I’m doing here?” she rants

You’re quiet. You don’t know what to say. A simple ‘I’m sorry’ isn’t going to solve this problem. Your silence only makes Sarah angrier.

“And Pope- he told us he saw you with some boy last week, apparently this is the second time he’s seen you with him. And not once did you even think to tell me. Is this what you’re doing? Are you just abandoning us for some random guy? Why aren’t you saying anything?!” her voice finally gets loud, she didn’t want your mom to worry but she wanted you to understand how she feels.

“Now, I’m not abandoning you guys. I’m just taking a break. You don’t get it alright” you say, getting up from your vanity and walking back and forth across your room.

“I don’t get it because you never told me anything. One day we were great, we put you and JJ on a boat and the next morning you never speak to me again. What happened on that boat?”

“JJ and I just had a bad argument. Instead of arguing, I’m just taking a break from him so we wouldn’t argue so much” it wasn’t the full truth, but it was something you could give her. Sarah stood silent to let you speak.

“If you were tired of the arguing imagine how I was. And as for the boy, I met him when Pope saw us the first time I’m guessing. But the second time, we had just started dating. We still are dating. I’m going out to see his friends now” 

Sarah was silent, trying to process everything you were saying. You, dating a guy you hadn’t known for long was unlike you.

“I’m fine Sarah. I’m doing good actually. I have a good boyfriend who is treating me right and his friends are treating me like they’ve known me longer than they’ve known him. You and the rest of the pogues can stop worrying about me now. I’ll be around soon but right now, I’m not ready yet”

Sarah sucked on her teeth, she couldn’t believe what she was hearing right now. You started putting on your shoes and started walking to the door, Sarah stepping in your way.

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

“I already told you, I’m going to my boyfriend’s friend’s house to hangout”

Sarah scoffed, “so you’re leaving this here, all for some people you barely even know? This isn’t like you, Y/n. Just talk to me and we could have this all figured out”

“I don’t want to talk right now Sarah and I promised Jayden I would be there today. I’m sorry for everything and I’m sorry for leaving right now but I have to go whether you like it or not.” 

You maneuvered around her and opened the door, walking out of your room and going down the stairs. “Y/n” Sarah called out, you looked back as she was slowly going down the stairs.

“If you need anything. Someone to laugh with, someone to gush about your new boyfriend too, someone to cry on their shoulder. I’m here” Sarah said, her voice shaky like she was about to cry. 

You walked to Sarah and hugged her tightly, tears streaming down both of your faces. You knew this wasn’t a goodbye, this wasn’t something where you would never see her again. It was more of a way of both of you saying you miss each other without actually saying you miss each other.

“I’ll talk to you soon, okay?” you whispered in her ear. Sarah nodded quickly after, “yeah, I’d like that” she laughed lightly, you laughing with her.

You separate from her and just look at her for a moment. You get the feeling to just ditch Jayden and stay with Sarah. Go back to the chateau and just hang out with everyone. You just tell everyone about the new people you met and make fun of them. You knew JJ would like it too, he had a thing for making fun of wealthy people.

But you didn’t.

You walked out of your front door, saying bye to Sarah and you drive to Jayden’s house. You waited for him to come out of his house and you looked at yourself in the mirror, your eyes puffy, a sign you had been crying. But that didn’t matter, your only thoughts were of the pogues suddenly, your only thoughts were of him.

When Jayden showed up in your car and kissed your lips. He didn’t even question your state and just went straight to talking about nonsense. Talking about things you never really cared about. You would look at him occasionally. Just because you were admiring him. You only ever did that with him. But because you started to think did you really like Jayden, or was he some sort of distraction? 

You showed up at Rafael’s house, everyone already in some sort of bathing suit with a beer in their hand. You didn’t want one so once you settled down, you got into the pool. Conversations striking left and right. But you weren’t interested in them. Your mind always wandered to someplace else. You were like this the entire night.

You kept thinking about them and how happier you would be if you were there. Sarah’s words made you feel like you abandoned them. But JJ didn’t want you there. He didn’t like you being there. Then why do you keep thinking of him? Why are you imagining yourself with JJ, being a little too close if he didn’t like you? 

It’s a shame your mind is everywhere else but present. Maybe if your mind was where everyone else was you would notice the pity stares you’re getting right now. Maybe you would notice Diana getting close to Jayden. Maybe you would notice their whispering. But you didn’t. And every time you looked at him, he smiled back at you. 

You felt pity for him. From your perspective, you’re thinking of a different guy while you’re still with him. To you, he isn’t a bad boyfriend. To you, he deserves better. When you get up, he separates himself from Diana, and you walk over to him, sitting next to him. You kissed his cheek and then started to engage in the current conversation.

After you left Sarah went to the chateau, telling everyone what happened. She told them about how you have a new boyfriend named Jayden. She told them what you looked like. You looked normal but you didn’t look like yourself. She told them her suspicions. She told them she thinks you don’t even want to be with Jayden and that you don’t want to be with his friends either.

JJ heard it all. He wanted to go pick you up and take you back here with him. But who is he to you? The guy who made her push everyone away. The guy who made become friends with this random guy’s friends. He caused all of this. So why would you listen to him?

He was jealous when Sarah mentioned Jayden. He had been jealous when Pope had brung it up at first. He was the one who convinced the group that maybe the boy she gave her number to was just a friend. But the group knew he wasn’t, they just let JJ think he convinced them. JJ mainly convinced himself. He was jealous when Pope saw you and him again, “clinging onto each other” in Pope’s words. 

JJ knew he shouldn’t be jealous, he was the one that helped the guy. But there was still that part of him that couldn’t help being jealous.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

You and Sarah slowly started to make up. You met up with her once since she showed up at your house three weeks ago. You spoke more about how you were doing, and how Jayden was, even showing pictures of him and all of his friends. Sarah did the same, talking about the pogues and about how much they missed you. She told you how JJ has been different since the boat. He was a lot quieter and a little calmer. It was getting harder and harder for him o want to go out, John B, Kie, and Pope doing all they could to even get him to surf. JJ loves surfing.

He didn’t even want to party anymore. Just wanted to stay in John B’s bed all day and sleep all day. It was different from the JJ you once knew.

Sometime after the meetup Sarah had convinced you to let Jayden meet her, baby steps she said. This was mainly so Sarah could get his vibe and report back to the pogues but she didn’t tell you that. She claimed it was because she wanted to warn him if he ever broke your heart.

Today was the day, Sarah had told you to meet up at the Wreck so all you had to do was get Jayden and meet her there. You had called and texted him with no response, something you’re getting used to lately because he keeps oversleeping. When he does you have to go to his room and wake him up so you knew that’s what you would most likely do today. You got ready and texted him you were on the way just in case he woke up in the middle of your driving.

You pulled to his house and walked in, already knowing the door was opened. You walked up the stairs and knocked on his door, once, twice. No response. You twisted the knob to see if he had locked it or not. But it was unlocked.

You walked in saying, “Jayden, we’re meant to be seeing Sarah today, can you wake-”

You stopped yourself. The sight in front of you makes you sick. You feel humiliated, embarrassed, angry, and lied to.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you say loudly, Jayden and Diana jumping awake.

Both of their eyes wide, “Wait wait wait wait. Baby, Baby-” Jayden started.

“Don’t you fucking baby me. How dare you? How dare you?!” You ask him.

Diana pulled the covers over her body, “Y/n, I’m so sorry I-” she started.

“Save it.” you kept your eyes on Jayden. “I can’t fucking believe this, how long has this been going on?”

The both of them were silent. “Fucking Answer me!” you yell.

“Since before I saw you at that place the first time” Jayden responded.

Your head felt dizzy. You couldn’t believe this. This was the secret this group was hiding. 

“Y/n, baby. I’m sorry I didn’t- It was an accident” Jayden said getting closer to you.

“An accident? An accident is spilling milk on the floor or tripping somewhere. This is no accident! You putting your dick inside her multiple times is not an accident!” you said getting angrier.

“I have needs baby, come on. We were together for a month and we never had sex. You don’t even send pics. I needed to release, baby. You understand that, don’t you?”

You were stunned. All of this was because he needed to fuck someone? He just needed a good lay? Is he fucking serious? Trying to blame you when he can’t keep his dick in his pants.

Although you didn’t feel an ounce of love for him. This still hurt you. No one likes being cheated on. 

“And to think I was gonna introduce you to my best friend today” tears started to stream down your face. 

“Y/n…” he says quietly, his arms open, taking a step closer. You step back.

“No. We’re done. Don’t call me. Don’t text me. Don’t even look at me!” you yell at him, tears still coming out of your eyes. Your eyes went to Diana, “and you. I liked you.” you scoffed. You walked out of his room, the tears trickling down to your clothes, messing your makeup up.

Once you get into your car and start driving to your house, you almost forgot to call Sarah. When you dial her number down she answers immediately, “I’m almost out the door right now-” she started, her voice cheerful as ever.

“Don’t even bother showing up. He’s a dick” you said, it was obvious you had been crying.

“Y/n, are you okay baby? What happened?” Sarah asked, worry in her voice.

You begin to cry again, even just saying the words make you sick.

“Jayden he- he was in bed with Diana,” you said, a cry following after you.

“Oh babe, I’ll be at your house in two seconds. I’ll be there” Sarah said, the sound of her front door closing.

“No, Sarah. I- Don’t come please, I-”

“I told you when you need a shoulder to cry on,  I’ll be there. I’m on my way now” she said hanging up.

She felt awful for you. She texted Kie about the change of plans, she was staying with you for the rest of the day. Jayden cheated on you.

Kie told John B, Pope, and JJ. Hearing you got cheated on made JJ’s blood boil. What was the point of being with you if he was gonna cheat? He couldn’t stay loyal for a month? JJ wanted to do something, anything. He was about to go to your house but Kie had reminded him Sarah would be there with you. 

That’s what stopped him. Knowing you had someone else there with you.

And you did.

Sarah showed up at your house and hugged you tighter than she’s ever hugged you before. You just cried and cried and cried on the poor girl. Sarah helped you clean your makeup off as she reminded you how beautiful you look. Sarah would look at her phone occasionally, it was mostly Kie telling her how worried JJ is and JJ texting her to see how you were holding up.

You told her everything, how Jayden first started to not wake up. Now looking back it was just him waking up Diana and getting her out before you could see her. Or maybe he hid her when you showed up. You didn’t care. You told her what happened at his friend’s house, how after Sarah spoke to you all, you thought about the pogues. All you thought about was how it would’ve been better if you were with them. 

You and Sarah at one point changed into pajamas, Sarah changing into the one she leaves behind. After several hours of crying, yelling, singing, and dancing. It was beginning to get late, your eyes were both tired from the crying but also tired because you were just exhausted.

Sarah held you in her arms, your mind begins to wander. 

“Do they know?” you ask quietly. Sarah knew exactly who you were talking about. She nodded.

“What did he say?” you ask even quieter. Sarah knew who you were talking about, but she wanted you to say it. “Who?” she asks. 

“JJ.” 

Sarah closes her eyes, holding you tighter. You were fully expecting her to say nothing, you were expecting her to say he didn’t care.

“He’s been worried sick. It’s kinda cute actually. Look” Sarah says, showing you her phone and the text messages JJ has sent.

You weren’t expecting so many texts asking how you were, if he could come over, how could he help, when she thinks you’ll be fine. Sarah just kept responding with you were getting there, that he shouldn’t come over, that he shouldn’t help, and that it takes time.

But every time JJ insisted on going over, he wanted to know your current status, he wanted to help. Once Sarah stopped answering, he kept texting the same messages as before. 

At the bottom of the screen, you see the familiar three dots. They disappeared for a second and a new message popped up. “I see you reading my texts. Answer them and let me come over Sarah.”

You smile, something Sarah hasn’t seen in a while. You close your eyes once Sarah takes her phone away.

“I know this isn’t the right time. But whatever he said on the boat, Y/n. He didn’t mean it.” Sarah says quietly, when you didn’t respond, she went on.

“You see he cares about you Y/n. And it isn’t my place to tell you. But you mean a lot to him, he just doesn’t know how to handle it sometimes”

You sighed.

“Goodnight, Sarah”

Sarah was quiet, getting the memo.

“Goodnight, Y/n”

 ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

It’s been quiet now. You’ve just been in your room. Like how you were after the boat. Sarah would come over every single day, even if it meant spending 30 minutes with you, she would come over. She would even sometimes bring Kie with her. 

And every time either of them would come over, their phone would always get a text ping. And every time you glanced at their phone. Even a little bit. It always said either JJ or JJ Maybank.

You’ve been moping around, Sarah was starting to feel bad, summer was about to end and John B had suggested throwing a kegger a few days ago, JJ was not really into the idea. He also said this could be an opportunity to try to get you back with the pogues. Once John B said that JJ was down.

So after Sarah was at the chateau and went to your house to just hang out, she had brought some clothes over so she could leave to the kegger after your house. But she wanted you to join her. 

As she was getting ready in your room, you were snuggled up in your bed, watching her mumble some song lyrics that were playing in your room. Sarah always looked pretty, but she would always outdo herself when it comes to parties. She loved going to them and she loved the thrill of being at them. The adrenaline rushes you get and the energy that everyone has bounces off each other.

“You should come,” Sarah said, sending you out of your trace.

“What?”

“You should come. You haven’t been to a party in forever” she looked back at you.

“That isn’t true. Remember I would go to Jayden’s friend’s parties” you remind her, she rolled her eyes at the name of Jayden.

“Yeah, but those don’t count. I mean you haven’t been to a party with me in forever. If you don’t come right, you’ll have a shitty summer”

“This summer has already been shit.” you roll your eyes. Sarah walked to the side of your bed and pouted.

“I would be really happy if you came Y/n. I miss you”

You laugh, “I’m right here. You saw me yesterday and the day before that and the day before that you even brought Kie.”

“I miss the fun you have.”

You stood silent. The words hurt. Not because Sarah said it in a mean way, but because she was true. You haven’t been having fun, with anyone. You were different. More bland and private. Sarah used to be able to read you completely. Now you built a wall, so thick and so high that she hasn’t been able to break through it.

“Y/n,” Sarah says quietly, looking at you in your eyes. “What did JJ say on the boat?”

Your eyes leave hers. You didn’t want to tell her. You don’t want to. You didn’t want her to think of JJ differently. You didn’t want her to hate her boyfriend’s best friend. But god did you need to get it off of your chest.

“Just promise you won’t think of him differently” Sarah nodded.

“I said promise, Sarah,” you said, your voice stern.

Sarah was confused at the change of tone, “I promise I won’t think of him differently. And I won’t hate him”

You looked at her and nodded.

“After you guys left us, we didn’t talk. I was waiting for him to talk to me. Then the sun started to set and my phone had died, I thought to make a peace offering, I could give him our stash since you guys didn’t leave us food.” 

“I told John B you guys needed something but continue”

You smiled at her for a second. “Let me just say, JJ was pissed that you guys left us alone. Like he was distraught, more so than me. And I only know that because was on the edge of where you guys left us, looking in the direction you left in. But I tried to give him the chips and talk to him but he just refused. We started arguing per usual but this time he just seemed angrier. He was saying things about how I chose to be friends with the pogues and how I could’ve been friends with kooks. He then went on to say how none of you guys liked hanging out with me and gave me reasons why you put up with me”

Sarah’s heart dropped. She knew JJ, and she knew that wasn’t like JJ. She knew what she was going to do at the party.

“I know now, he’s just an idiot and wasn’t thinking before he spoke. He was just upset. He even apologized after he said it, and tried apologizing the morning after. And I don’t fully forgive him. But hearing what he was saying hurt Sarah, terribly. At that moment I thought they were true. So I told him I wouldn’t be around you guys anymore, and I wasn’t around you guys.” 

“Can I hug you?”

You nodded, Sarah getting closer to you as you both wrapped your arms around each other. “I’m so sorry that happened. None of what he said is true. I’ll talk to him tonight”

“No, don’t.” You cut her off. Sarah separated herself, confused. “I just.. I don’t want him to be mad that I told someone. I don’t want him to hate me more than he does”

Sarah laughed, “he doesn’t hate you, Y/n. He never did. He just needed to find a reason to hate you. But since you don’t want me to talk about him, I won’t.” She lied. Of course, she was going to tell him. She knew he wouldn’t be upset, but even if he did, she wouldn’t have cared.

“Thanks” you smiled at her. Sarah smiled and got up from the bed, going to your closet. Your brows knit together. “What are you doing?”

“I’m picking out your outfit for the kegger”

You sat up from your bed, “Who said I was going?”

“I did” Sarah smiled.

“Sarah, I don’t have an outfit, my hair isn’t done, and it’ll take me too long to get ready. I can’t go”

Sarah pulled out a short black dress you had stuffed in your closet long ago. “You have an outfit, I can do your hair and makeup. It’ll be quiet” Sarah said a devilish smile on her face.

“What about my mom?”

“Y/n, you walk out of your house all the time. What’s stopping you now? Just come to the kegger.”

“What if Jayden’s there?”

Sarah rolled her eyes, “he’s not gonna be there, and if he is fuck him. Show him what he cheated on. He’s a loser anyone so it shouldn’t matter if he was there or not.”

You thought about it. A smile crept on your face. You nodded and Sarah squealed loudly. She pulled you out of bed and sat you down on your vanity. She pulled your hair down and quickly went to work, taming the beast you developed over time. Not long after she started to do your makeup, telling you how excited she was you were going. Giggling at just the thought before everything started. She told you how excited Pope and John B were gonna be, she even included JJ in it.

Once she was done with your makeup you got changed in your bathroom, once you were in the dress you looked at yourself in the mirror. You knew you were gonna get clod but who cares? You looked more like yourself than you did when you were with Jayden. You liked how you looked, Sarah did a good job making it look like it took hours to get ready. 

“Are you gonna come out or stay locked up in your bathroom forever?” Sarah called out from the outside. You laughed and opened the door, her mouth opening the minute she saw you. “You look so hot!” she squealed loudly.

“I feel like it too,” you say, Sarah, laughing.

“This is so exciting. I can’t wait to get you drunk” Sarah giggled.

“No way, I’m the DD. I agreed to go, you have to agree with me now” 

Sarah pouted and gave you puppy eyes. “That may work on John b, but it doesn’t work on me. So give me your keys, I’m driving and let’s get the fuck out of here.” 

Sarah smirked, “don’t make me makeout with you right now,” she said, you both laughed, and eventually Sarah gave you the car keys as you both got into the car.

Sarah was controlling the music the whole time while you were driving to the beach. She was yelling and screaming every lyric to every song she played. Her voice just never got tired and it made you laugh the entire time. You joined her for a couple of songs, but you mainly enjoyed the show. You missed this.

When you parked the car Sarah got out after seeing her boyfriend from the window. She smiled at the way she clung onto him like he was her lifeline. You wished you had something like that, but the last thing you needed right now was boy troubles.

You locked the door and walked up to where Sarah was, who was just with the pogues, except JJ. When you showed up John B and Pope’s eyes lit up. Pope hugged you immediately, “God I missed you. I was starting to lose brain cells with these guys,” he said. You just laughed. “Long time no see,” John B said.

“Yeah, Long time no see. Missed you guys” You respond, John B awes you and hugs you.

“Can we please share her? I need to hug her too” Kie said. 

“You saw her two days ago. I haven’t seen her in almost three months” John B defended himself, still keeping you close.

Kie pulled John B away from you and hugged you gently, “Are you back now?” she asked. The rest of the pogues behind Kie waiting for an answer. You roll your eyes playfully, “since you insist” you say.

They cheer, everyone now excited to have you around again. John B gets you a cup filled with some liquor, “I’m the DD tonight, can’t” you respond.

“But it’s your first night back” Kie pleaded with you.

“I know, but I want to make sure everyone is okay for the night. Next one I’ll drink” you promised them. The pogues nodded and John B took whatever was inside the cup for you.

The rest of the night was filled with laughter and catching up. You and Kie finally talk about what happened since you were gone, bringing up the fact that JJ was different. 

“Where is he anyway?” you asked.

“He was here before you showed up, probably off with some girl” Kie responded, going back to how everything was.

You felt a pang in your heart with the thought of him with someone else. This wasn’t the first time you felt that pang when someone mentioned JJ with a girl. But there wasn’t much you could do about it. So you chose to do what you always did, ignored it.

You spoke to John B about Sarah, and how much she missed you while you were gone. But when she started going over to your house every day that she was happier than ever. He acknowledged what happened with Jayden and said he was sorry for what happened. John B always felt like a brother to you, so it was no surprise that your heart grew warm when he felt bad. You told him not to worry about it and to just focus on Sarah tonight and have fun.

You then moved on to Pope who had, so many things to tell you. He was never a big drinker so he was soberer than you are you thought. He told you all of his thoughts and theories he had when you were away. He was giving you updates about schools and such and explained he missed having deep, thoughtful conversations with you. Out of the corner of your eye though, you saw a girl looking at him. You whispered it into his ear and when he looked she blushed. You took that as a sign to find Sarah as you told him to shoot his shot.

You went looking for a certain blond. You hadn’t seen him the entire time you were there and you were beginning to think he left at some point. Sarah found you first though, so when she saw you, she pulled you and started to dance with you. You could tell Sarah was already drunk but you didn’t mind it, the whole point of the kegger was to get drunk and have fun.

You’ve been at the kegger for a couple of hours now, talking to other people, meeting the last of the tourins that were the last on the island. You were enjoying yourself, completely sober, and still having a good time. 

But then you saw him. 

Hanging out with his friends. Pointing at you and looking back at his friends. You were gonna ignore him, he didn’t deserve your time of day. Once the laughing got louder you chose to try to walk away. You didn’t want to start something at the kegger, not after everything you’ve been this summer already.

But once you started to walk away, someone bed your arm. You quickly turn around and it’s April. Jayden’s other girl friend, or maybe someone else he was sleeping with.

“Y/n, where’d you go? Come join us” April said.

You shook your head quickly, “I’m sorry April. I have to get back to my friends” you say, putting your hand on top of her’s so she could let go. 

“We just wanted to talk to you, it’ll take five minutes. Tops.” April smiled, you were cautious. You looked around the kegger for any sign of your friends so you could get out of this situation. But you couldn’t find one, not even Sarah who had been dancing the whole night. When you looked back you were already being dragged back to April and the rest of Jayden’s friends.

“Y/n!” Kolton called out, you awkwardly smiled. He was standing in between his friends, looking at you up and down. Smirking.

“We haven’t seen you in forever. Just because Jayden was fucking Diana doesn’t mean you should ditch us” Austin slurred, the rest of them laughing with him.

“Hey could you guys make this quick, I have to be with my friends,” you tell them, visibly uncomfortable.

“Your friends that you left? That you replaced?” Alana started, “if they were your friends you wouldn’t have replaced them. Stay here with us” you looked at Jayden since he was the only person who knew about the pogues, he didn’t know why you left them, just the fact that you spaced yourself from them.

“I’m sorry if you guys aren’t gonna say something worth my time, I’ll get going,” you say, beginning to walk away. But Jayden had grabbed your wrist.

“Don’t worry about them, I just wanted to talk to you. We’re all drunk” Jayden confessed, the rest of them laughing. You tried to pull your wrist away but he kept his hold on it.

“I just wanted to talk to you.” He repeats, one of his hands caressing your cheek, the other still on your wrist. You moved your face away from his touch.

“I don’t want to talk to you, Jayden”

He scoffed. “You don’t want to talk to me? Why? Because I was fucking someone behind your back?” he laughed. “It shouldn’t have been that big of a deal. I mean it doesn’t seem like it is now. You’re at a party, dancing like a slut. Talking to other guys” 

Your eyes widened at his words. He probably won’t even remember this in the morning. You didn’t care about him, you never loved him, and he was just your boyfriend for a little over a month. You shouldn’t even count that as a relationship.

But if he didn’t matter, why are his words making you upset?

“I should’ve guessed you liked being thrown around. If I did I could’ve given my boys a chance. Right guys?” he asked his friends

“You know I was already asking for it,” Rafael said.

“I don’t like used-up whores” Kolton responded with bitterness in his voice. His friends laughed at his comment.

“Come on, compared to April? It’ll be an upgrade” Garrett said.

“She’s been used up. I should know. And every other guy here knows it too” Jayden continues.

“Didn’t you say you were fucking Diana because I wasn’t giving it up to you? Retracing your words?” you remind him. Jayden smiles.

“That’s what was my favorite thing about you. You were always so feisty. It’s kinda turning me on now” he said getting closer. 

Your fight or flight kicks in finally, and you try to get his hand on your wrist. “Let go of me” you mumbled to him. His friends around him are saying awful things about it. Calling you a slut, a whore, ugly, dry, used up, fake, annoying. Everything in the books.

“Come on, Y/n. One last time” Jayden said, his lips getting close to yours. But you slap him just before he could. He was holding the side of his face with both of his hands, your wrists finally free.

“Leave me the fuck alone and get the fuck off the island,” You said sternly, you walked away from them and went straight to where the drinks were. 

Their words to you shouldn’t matter, they don’t matter to you. Just some random people you knew for a month at most. Then why are you washing down their insults with drinks? You were taking shots, anyone that handed you a drink, you took, you even made your own. With the alcohol in your system, you forgot everything they said, you forgot everything that happened over the summer. It didn’t matter anymore, you were having fun.

JJ had been watching you from the minute you showed up, from afar obviously. He could tell you were looking for him at some points, but he didn’t have the guts to go up to you. So he just stood watching. 

Usually, JJ would have a drink, but he didn’t have one. You may hate him and he saw that you weren’t drinking but he just wanted to make sure you were okay. He saw the way you spoke to John B, Kie, Pope, he saw the way you danced with Sarah. You looked like you needed this break from the world. He saw you speaking to some old friends and saw you speak with some new ones, but you looked okay.

He saw someone walk up to you, a very drunk girl. He saw you look around but you end up being pulled away. JJ is about to walk up to you but someone else gets his attention.

“JJ!” Sarah calls, sloppily walking over to him, JJ meets her halfway and laughs, his back now facing where you were. 

“Sarah, how much have you had to drink?” JJ asked, still laughing.

“Not enough, but that isn’t why I came over here. I wanted to talk to you about Y/n” she slurred her words, but JJ understood every word. His face became serious when your name was mentioned.

“She told me what happened on the boat. And I just want you to know that I don’t hate you. I really like you.” Sarah says, “but I know you like Y/n”

JJ’s face turned pink, he felt blessed that it was night and Sarah wasn’t able to see that well. “What? Where’d you get that idea” he asked her.

“You’re always asking for her JJ. You’re always looking for her, even before the boat thing. I want you to know I get it, you have abandonment issues. So do I, look at my mom. But I don’t want those issues to define who you are and how you are around people” Sarah’s words are combined, but JJ is listening. “I know you like her. I know you think you shouldn’t be with her. I think the same thing with John B. But you know what I do? I show him more love and affection than he’s ever had before.”

Sarah pauses to catch her breath, drinking what’s in her red solo cup. “And she doesn’t hate you. She never has hated you. I always told John B that you two would look so cute together. And you guys would. But I need you to be better to her, JJ. I need you to forget about your issues for a second and show her who you truly are.” she ranted, “If you want her, you’re gonna have to work harder than before, But it’ll be worth it because she’s worth it. You need to fight for her. She likes you too JJ. That’s why she took your words so seriously. Cause your opinion matters to her more than John B’s or Pope’s or Kie’s. Maybe even mine” Sarah laughed at the last sentence. “So be kind to her, show her how you truly feel about her, and make sure you love her more than she loves you. Because of you don’t, I’ll break your neck” she laughed even louder than before.

JJ was thinking about her words, and even though she was drunk, she wasn’t wrong. JJ has always liked you, he thinks he always will like you. JJ was always a player but when you showed up, he got worse because of it. It came to the point where he imagined you instead of the girl he was actually with. 

John B came over and put his arm around Sarah, “what’s happening over here?” he laughs, sipping his drink now too. John B is now drunk, to be expected.

“I was just telling JJ that he should be with Y/n and that he likes her and that she likes him back” Sarah filled him in, and John B’s mouth opened.

“Dude, I’ve been saying for like ever. It came to the point where I thought you were in love with her” John B laughs, “and she likes you back”

“That’s what I’m saying!” Sarah said loudly, both her and her boyfriend now laughing.

“Then when they start dating we can go on double dates. We’ll be so cute, all of us” Sarah commented. 

“Just go for it. I know she means a lot to you, she always had.” John B said.

“Do I mean a lot to you?” Sarah asked him.

“Of course baby. I love you” John B said.

“I love you too,” Sarah said, their lips then locked on each, making out in front of JJ. 

He internally threw up in his mouth and turned around, but when he looked back he didn’t see you anymore. His eyes scattered everywhere and he couldn’t find you. He saw the new friends you made, he saw the mini bar, he saw some kooks, he saw a guy with his friends holding his face, he saw where you danced earlier.

JJ decided to make himself be seen, he saw Kie who was talking to some girl about ocean stuff. Kie also being drunk.

“Hey, have you seen Y/n?” JJ asked

“No, but she was looking for you earlier. Did you see her earlier she was looking so hot” Kie confessed. 

“Yeah, she was. If you see her, tell me” JJ said moving along to Pope.

“Hey man, I haven’t seen you in a while,” Pope said, clearly sober as day.

“Yeah, just been watching. Have you seen Y/n?”

Pope shook his head, “last time I saw her she was taking shots with some guys. When I went up to her she gave me Sarah’s keys.” he said holding them out.

JJ nodded, he took out the keys to the twinkie, “here, take these. You’ll drive John B and Sarah home tonight. I’ll take Kie and Y/n” 

Pope nodded to the new plan, the two of them traded keys and JJ walked away. He was now looking for you. He started to ask random people if they saw you, everyone saying something different.

Forty-five minutes had passed since he spoke to Pope and he still hasn’t found you. It was 3 AM and the kegger was still alive as ever. JJ was looking for you everywhere and he couldn’t find the girl who last spoke to you. Once JJ walked further down the beach, he then saw a familiar pretty girl in a familiar pretty black dress.

You were wobbling all over the place, talking to some random guy about your problems. Your words were slurring worst than Sarah’s who you saw ten minutes okay. But you then hear a familiar voice.

“Y/n?” he says.

You turn around and there he is. You excuse yourself from the guy, and cling to him “JJ!” you say excitingly.

JJ was so confused, the last time he saw you, you were stone-cold sober. Now he’s seeing you towards the water, wobbling around, talking to the air, and excusing yourself from the same air to hug him tightly. 

“I missed you so much,” you say to him, your head in his chest. You were way too drunk for him to try to stall to wait for Kie. He decided he would take you home right there, Pope could take Kie with him.

“Hey, we’re gonna go home okay?” 

All you do was nod, separate yourself from him, and start walking with him, wobbling next to him. JJ noticed it immediately and held onto you, his hand on your side to pull you close to him, your arm around his shoulders. 

JJ began to look for Pope who he found quickly, he raised his eyebrows and looked at you. Pope got the memo and nodded, now watching Kie. Once JJ knew he walked to Sarah’s car, you were babbling the whole way there. And once you got to the car you were silent, JJ opened the backseat so you could lie down.

He made sure you were comfortable and secure, once he knew you were he went in the driver’s seat. The minute he started driving, you started to speak up again.

“Where are we going?” you ask.

“I’m dropping you off home,” JJ said.

“No no no no no. I don’t want to go home. I want to go to John B’s house. Where you stay”

“Are you sure? I could take you to your hou-”

“No!” you demanded, “Alright, calm down,” JJ said.

“Hey, next one’s on me” 

“Whatever you say, cupcake”

You laughed quietly in the back, then it slowly became louder. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

“So you know about Jayden right? The guy that cheated on me? Well, he was the keeger and his friends were saying so many things to me. Like really mean things, and so was he. But tonight I-” you cut yourself off with your laughter. “I slapped him” you laughed even louder than before.

JJ stood silent, letting you speak longer. “It was so funny, you should’ve seen his face. You should’ve been there,” you said then you were quiet for a while. “Why weren’t you there?” you asked quietly.

JJ looked at you through his top mirror and then looked back at the road. He cleared his throat, “I was there” he responded.

“No, you weren’t. I kept looking for you and looking for you and I couldn’t find you. I thought you were with a girl. Were you?”

“No, I was watching you”

“Like a stalker?”

JJ was silent. Now that you say it like that it sounded creepy. He was just looking out for you but that’s something else a stalker would say. The more he thought about it the more it made him uncomfortable, but you sent him out of his trance with you giggling.

“JJ Maybank is my stalker” you giggled to yourself. JJ stood quiet letting you have your moment.

“Jayden was so boring anyway, I was out of his league anyway.” 

“You sure are” 

“You haven’t even seen him and you’re agreeing. That’s how you know I’m right” JJ laughed at your drunken state. Your words slurring together and the way you’re trying so hard to form a sentence is so cute to him.

“He just wanted to hangout with his boring friends all the time. And I always had to take him because he didn’t know how to drive” you laughed. “Do you know how I found out he cheated on me? We were meant to meet Sarah and then when I got to his house, I found him in bed with his girl space friend. Might as well be his actual girlfriend for how long they were fucking each other, it started before he and I started dating, which wasn’t long but still. And you know what excuse he gave? Because we never had sex, isn’t that childish?” You ranted.

JJ has only ever heard what Sarah has told him, so hearing you say how it went, made JJ upset. More than upset. It felt like when he first heard you got cheated on. He never found out why he cheated on you, but now that he does, he’s angry about it. He cheated on you because he needed to fuck someone and you weren’t willing? He’s a fucking idiot he thought. “You wouldn’t do that, would you JJ?” you ask him.

“No, not to you”

“Not to me or in general?”

“Both,” he said.

You and JJ stood silent. 

“JJ do you hate me?” you ask.

He looks at you through the mirror again, “I could never hate you, Y/n”

“Are you mad at me?

JJ was quiet for a moment, “no. Never.”

You giggled, “you know what I realized, his name is Jayden, and your name is JJ. Isn’t that funny?” you laughed. “What’s even funnier is how you both have the same basic features. His hair is almost blond and he has blue eyes too” 

JJ tilted his head to the side slightly after hearing the news. He thinks he knows who you’re talking about, mainly because he thinks he’s seen him at the wreck with some girl.

“But don’t worry JJ. You’re my favorite blue-eyed person. I can’t say blond because of Sarah. But you’re my favorite guy with blond hair”

JJ smiled, “thanks Y/n. You’re my favorite too” 

He pulls up to the chateau, once he puts the car in park and grabs the keys, he’s already going straight to the back. He scootches you closer to him so he could pick you up instead of making you walk, and he does.

You grab on around JJ’s neck as he carries you bridal style into the chateau and into the room he usually sleeps in. JJ places you on the bed and takes out a pair of sweatpants for you to wear. 

“I know you’re wearing a dress. Put these on, I’ll be right outside the door, and tell me when I could come in” JJ said, leaving you with the sweatpants. When he’s out he hears some groans and mumbles, but nothing too serious. He grabs a bucket and fills it with a little bit of water, a rag, and makeup wipes that Sarah had left, waiting at the door for you.

You open the door to let him back in and when JJ looks at you, you’re not only in his sweatpants but in his shirt, when he wants in he sees the discarded dress on the floor. “This is for you, you could take it off in the bathroom,” JJ said, handing you the makeup wipes.

You look at him in awe. Like he just hung the moon and the stars. And maybe in your drunken state, he did. You take the wipes and went to the bathroom closing the door behind you. JJ places the bucket close to the bed just in case you have an accident in the middle of the night and he isn’t there.

He takes his extra time to change into the same attire as you, a shirt with sweatpants. Usually, he wouldn’t have a shirt but, out of being a gentleman, he will tonight.

You walk out of the bathroom and hand him back the wipes, climbing into bed. JJ puts them away and goes back to you, crouching down so you could be at your level. “I’m gonna sleep on the sofa bed, when Kie gets here she can sleep in here with you. If you need anything just wake me up. I left a bucket f-” JJ was cut off.

But he wasn’t cut off by your words, or by the pogues coming home. He was cut off by a kiss, a kiss you gave him. It was unlike you. JJ was stunned for a moment, but his body moved as in instinct. Your lips were soft and warm. He can taste the alcohol from your lips. If it was any other situation, he would’ve deepened the kiss, grabbing your face. Pulling you closer so your bodies could collide with each other. He would’ve shown you how long he had been waiting and hungry for it but he didn’t think he deserved it. 

But he pulls away from you. When he does, he rests his forehead against yours, and you’re pouting at him. Disappointed in him. “Did I do something wrong?” you ask, sounding like you were about to cry.

“No, baby. No No. I just-” he was thinking of the right words to say. “You’re drunk, Y/n. I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret or forget about in the morning”

“But I won’t regret or forget about it J.” You tell him. 

JJ doesn’t know how to respond to that. The only thing he knows how to do is to kiss your cheek to keep you satisfied, which it does. He stands up straight.

“If I were sober, would you have kissed me back?” you giggled. You knew the answer, you just wanted him to say it. JJ rolled his eyes playfully, walking to the door. “Wait where are you going?” you sat up from the bed. 

“I told you I’ll sleep on the couch” 

“Stay here”

JJ looks between you and the door. “Y/n, I don’t think I-”

“Please.”

You flashed your puppy eyes at him, your first time doing it to him. He never understood how you were able to get whatever with it. But now he does. 

He sighs and slowly walks to the bed, slipping under the covers next to you. He feels the heat you’ve gained from under the blanket, he also feels you relax. Once he’s laying down, you wrap your arms around him, leaving a hand on top of his chest. JJ relaxes and puts an arm around your shoulders, keeping you close. His closes for a second, but once you move your hand on top of his chest slightly, he opens them again.

He notices the black and blue mark around your wrist, “Y/n” he whispers. You hum in response, too tired to answer anything anymore. “Who did that to your wrist?”

Your breathing pauses for a beat or two but continues soon after. “Jayden,” you said quietly. “And why did he do that?” he continues to speak in whispers, but you hum back at him. “You can tell me, baby. Why did he make a bruise on your wrist?” he asked, closing his eyes and leaning his head against yours.

You breathed in and out, “He and his friends were saying things about me. Calling me a slut, commenting on my dress, and who I was with. Telling me how easy I was, just saying mean things to me. When I tried to he wouldn’t let go after I told him to. He just kept talking and I think he was about to kiss me. But once I slapped him he let go though. And I left after that J.” 

“And then you got drunk afterward?”

You hum, JJ is quiet. “Are you mad at me?”

JJ shakes his head lightly, “no. Never.”

 ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

JJ had woken up twice. 

The first time was very early in the morning, and you were still in each other’s arms. You holding onto him especially tight. He had opened his eyes and once he saw you, he went back to sleep.

And again in the afternoon. The chateau was quiet, he knew everyone was sleeping. He noticed that the warm body that was next to him was no longer next to him. He wouldn’t be lying if he said he wasn’t upset you were no longer next to him. But he reminds himself you couldn’t have gone far, you didn’t have a car and you’re most definitely hungover.

JJ got up from the bed, rubbed his eyes, and made his way out of the familiar room, his dress still on the floor as he passed by it. He walks out of the room quietly and slowly, Pope sleeping in a small chair and Kie sleeping on the couch. He looks out the door and sees a familiar someone, the person he wanted to see when he woke up. 

When he walked out of the house you were sitting on the edge of the dock, the hms pogue boat on your right. You hadn’t noticed a new person was there with you until the wood you were sitting on started to make noise, it didn’t take a genius to know it was him. 

He stood standing as you were still sitting in his sweatpants and shirt. It was silent for a minute, a silence that made you both want to rip off your skin. But you didn’t. Because he broke the silence.

“Hey”

That’s all he said, after everything, last night all he had to say was hey. 

“Hi,” you said quietly.

“How are you holding up?”

“Other than a major migraine and a bucket full of embarrassment. I’m peachy”

JJ smiled a bit, he’s happy you were able to see it though. “Do you remember anything that happened last night? You got drunk pretty quickly”

“Yeah I remember” JJ stood quiet for a minute. He wanted to make you remember everything that happened last night. From when you first started drinking to when you asked him to stay in bed with you. 

“Everything?” He asked quietly.

You knew what he was talking about. The kiss.

You looked back at him and looked up to look at hin the eyes, “everything.”

JJ breathes in and out quietly, you turn back to the water. “Do you remember how excited everyone was to see you?” You smiled at the reminder. The smiles on their faces. You nodded in response. “They really missed you. I’m sure you already know that, they most likely told you. Does this mean you’re staying?”

You sighed. You didn’t know what you were gonna do. You planned on staying last night, but now with this thing with JJ. The boundaries you crossed. You don’t think you’ll ever be his friend after this, you’ll always feel that feeling of something more, little did you know so would he.

“I don’t know” you answered truthfully. 

JJ stood up straighter, he was confused. You were having so much fun last night, it looked so natural to you. The thought of you not coming back and his friends being upset again crushed him.

“What do you mean? I thought you were gonna back up”

“Things have changed JJ, especially now. I don’t think I can put myself through it, not again”

“Y/n, our fighting isn’t going to happen again. They need you around. You don’t understand what it was like when you were gone.”

You scoffed at that. You didn’t understand what you were going through. He doesn’t understand what you went through.

“I went through the same thing as they did, if not worse.”

“You aren’t seriously comparing the two are you?”

You stood up from the edge of the dock, you turned to face him. “I am because you don’t get to tell me what they felt when I had to deal with the guilt of leaving.”

“And you’re willing to feel that guilt again?” You scoffed at his words, beginning to walk past him. “I can’t tell you what to do but I can encourage you to stay. They want you around Y/n, they need you around” he went on to say, you continued to walk away.

“I need you around”

You stopped. You felt so many emotions. There was a part of you that wanted to run back to him and smother him with kisses. The other half of you wanted to yell and scream in his face for how he treated you.

So you listened to that other half.

You turned around quickly and looked like you were on a mission. “That’s real funny of you JJ because three months ago you wanted nothing to do with me. Now you say you need. Do you need me to be around you? If you need someone around you don’t treat them like shit and that’s exactly what you did to me.” 

“Y/n, listen-”

“No, you listen!” you yelled, not caring if the pogues woke up and see you yelling at him. “I was nothing but nice to you and you treated me like I was trash. Like I wasn’t there like I didn’t exist. Like I didn’t matter. But now. Now! I matter. After I kiss you when I’m drunk, I matter!” 

JJ was silent. You had every right to yell at him, he did this. He made you like this. He understands how the switch-up confuses you. He knows he deserves every second of this, this is something he’s willing to take. So he just lets it happen.

“You remember when I asked you why you hated me? Do you? And you always told me that it was because I was a kook. What about now? Does it still matter I’m still a kook? Or does it just go away?! Tell me JJ. Does it just go away?!” you push his chest. 

“I had to leave my friends because of you! I got into a relationship to forget the feeling! To forget the thought that I abandoned them! And you did that! You made me abandon my friends! It’s not fair how you made me leave them and now you’re telling me they want me back. That you need me back!” You look up at him and all you see are his sad blue eyes.

You push his chest again, and again, and again, and again. There were tears quickly coming down your face, and you were yelling at him. Telling him how it wasn’t fair. Telling him he’s a dickhead. Telling him how you hate how he makes you feel. Telling him how you feel right now.

JJ wrapped his arms around you as you tried to keep pushing. Stopping once he was too close so you just sobbed into him, wrapping your arms around him too. JJ kept kissing the top of your head, trying to soothe you and call you down. He just wanted to be with you.

You hated him right now. Sometimes people say things out of anger. Sometimes people say things they don’t mean. But not you. You meant every word. And you wanted to make sure he knew you meant it, and he did know. 

You did feel like it was unfair. You knew he was a dickhead. You felt angry. And you did hate how he makes you feel. You want to fully hate him. But you can’t, even if you try to convince yourself, you can’t. 

Once you calmed down, JJ pulled away slightly, but you held him closer. You didn’t want to let him go you didn’t want to go back to how you were before. You didn’t want to go back to reality. You wanted to stay here, clinging onto him, and not thinking about anything else.

But once JJ tried to slip away again, you knew it wasn’t possible. 

He looked at you, but you weren’t looking back at him, staring at the floor. JJ lifted your chin to look at him. Once you did he wiggled his other hand to wrap it around your hand. He held your hand so gently, but he still had a good grip on you. 

“I’m so sorry for everything. For the way, I treated you over the years, for the words I’ve said to you. I’m sorry for what I said on the boat. I’m sorry for making you leave us. I’m sorry for not being there for you when I should’ve been. I’m sorry for making you feel like you weren’t there like you didn’t exist like you didn’t matter. Because you do matter. You matter to me. You always have” 

There were tears still streaming down your face, but now JJ was matching you. He didn’t realize he was crying until the droplet was hanging from his face. 

“You shouldn’t say things you don’t mean JJ,” you said quietly.

“But I do mean them. I mean all of them.” 

“JJ-” 

He kisses you. His hand is on the side of your side to keep you close. He was gentle with you, but you felt the hunger from his lips. You felt the longing and felt how bad he wanted this, needed this even. It wasn’t sloppy like last night, it wasn’t a chance he took. It was passionate. It was hard. It was perfect.

He was so warm. He smelled like leftover cologne and wood. JJ’s eyes were closed. His nose was brushing against your’s but you didn’t mind it. His lips feel smooth and it was obvious JJ was a good kisser. He wasn’t rough with you, he wanted you to feel it this time. 

For the first second and a half, you stopped breathing. But you eventually kissed him back, closing your eyes with him. Your hands were on his face and his neck and once he felt you kiss back the hand that once held yours was holding your waist, pulling you close. 

His mind fogged up with just you. Only you. Nothing and no one else, just you. All those hookups meant nothing because right now you’re with him. All those years of yearning for you finally came true.

Your mind fogged up with just him. You’ve always liked JJ, maybe you even loved him. But all the memories from before came rushing back. All of them. 

You pulled back, JJ following you. But then he couldn’t follow you anymore. You both were breathing heavily. Again, his forehead leaning against yours. 

“J,” you said, your voice breathy.

JJ doesn’t respond, waiting for you to finish.

“I have to go,” you say.

His heart dropped. He knew what you meant. He knew what you were trying to stay. He doesn’t want you to go, he doesn’t want you to leave him. 

“No… Stay”

“I have to go, J” stepping away from him, looking into his eyes.

“You asked me last night if you were sober and if I would’ve kissed you back. And I would have. I would’ve kissed you at the kegger. I would’ve kissed you on the boat. I would’ve kissed you at the chateau. I would’ve kissed you when I first met you. Please don’t go”

“I can’t J.” your hands leave him.

“Let me take you home at least, please Y/n.” he pleaded with you.

You shook your head at him. “I can’t let you do that J,” you said

“Why not?”

“Cause then I’ll stay here,” you said softly.

JJ just sighed, looking up at the sky for a second, his eyes getting watery again. He then looked at the ground to avoid eye contact with him.

“I’m taking Sarah’s keys. When she wakes up if you could tell her”

JJ never responded, just silently crying, looking at the ground. You walked towards him and grabbed ahold of his wrist and shoulder to keep your balance. JJ saw the bruise around your wrist again. And you kissed his cheek. “I’ll see you around JJ” you whispered.

You then walked back into the chateau, you were crying too now. You just kept wiping your tears when you walked inside the chateau. You grabbed the car keys and quickly walked out, looking at JJ one last time.

He was crouched down, his arms folded and his head on them. He would move slightly. He was sobbing.

You looked away and got into Sarah’s car, starting it and driving away from him. 

Much to JJ’s unlucky life, the pogues had seen and watched the scene. When you walked in Kie and Pope pretended to still be asleep but you didn’t even glance at them. JJ was out on the dock for an hour before he wiped his tears and went back inside the chateau. When he walked in, the pogues all looked at him. 

He didn’t want to deal with them and their questions right now so he just went back to the room you slept in and locked the door behind him. He went into bed, your scent still engraved in the sheets even when you weren’t there for long. When he sat up from the bed, he saw your dress in the corner of the room.

JJ closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall. Wanting nothing more than to just have you with him again.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

Now and again you would go back to the chateau but only went JJ wasn’t around. Usually, he was working and Sarah would promise you he wouldn’t be there for a while. You would go in your car and just hang out with them like you used to. You even had a chance to surf with them. 

But when he came back, before he could even see you, you would quickly say your goodbyes and leave in your car. That’s the only reason why you would bring your car, it was so you could make a quick exit. 

Fortunately for you, the pogues never pestered you with questions. They never asked why you were avoiding JJ. It seemed like they were just happy to have you around. But you felt the absence when you were there. There was a missing piece.

Unfortunately for JJ, they always asked him questions. Every time they saw him they asked him why you were avoiding him. He would simply say, “you guys saw what happened. I don’t know” and then go to the room he stood in.

They wanted you both back together but the boat idea was out of the question, and that ruined everything for everyone. So they didn’t know what they were going to do now.

Today JJ was with the pogues at the wreck, helping Kie do her job. John B’s keys with her mom and Sarah’s phone with her dad so they couldn’t get distracted. But now they were just taking a break, all of them outside of the wreck. Talking about nonsense.

A car full of people pulled up to the parking lot. They were extremely loud, the pogues glancing at them a few times but continuing their conversation. Three girls and three girls get out of the car.

“They look familiar” Sarah mumbled, the pogues then looking at them as they walked to the entrance.

A guy got out of the passenger seat, “make sure it comes quick!” he said, leaning against the car. 

“Oh my god,” Sarah said, “What?” Pope asked confused.

The guy’s friends laughed and walked into the wreck, the guy now scrolling on his phone.

“That’s Jayden,” Sarah said. JJ looked at the guy, with light brown hair, and blue eyes. It was him.

“Whose Jayden?” John B asked, getting overprotective. 

“Y/n’s ex. The guy that cheated on her over the summer. She showed me pictures of him and his friends one time.” 

“Is he? JJ and I have seen him with some girl, it was the girl with the dark hair” Kie said.

“That’s Diana! Oh my god, don’t look at him. I don’t know if Y/n showed me what I look like. Act like we’re having a conversation” Sarah said, looking away, Jayden not even noticing the pogues.

“We were having a conversation,” Pope said plainly.

“You know what I mean!” Sarah whisper yelled. 

The conversation they were just having again picked up, but JJ didn’t engage in it this time. He just kept staring at him. He never left his sight. The bruise on your wrist flashed in his eyes. The memories of what you said he and his friends were saying to you popped up in his mind. JJ just saw red. 

He stood up, the pogues not noticing at first. 

“You’re Jayden, right?” JJ asked, walking to him.

Jayden looked up and looked JJ up and down. He looked confused. The pogues looked up once they heard JJ’s voice.

“Yeah, why?” Jayden responded.

Not even a second later JJ punched him in the face, Jayden getting low to the ground.

“JJ!” Kie yelled, the rest of the pogues getting up to stop him.

But JJ never stopped, he just kept punching him, and punching him, and punching him. He couldn’t stop. He just kept thinking of the bruise, and your face when you told when what they said. He kept thinking of you.

Eventually, the pogues finally pulled JJ off, “What the fuck man?” Jayden yelled, blood leaking out of his nose.

“Why don’t you give me a bruise huh?! Give me one!” JJ yelled out. 

John B and Pope were trying to calm JJ down, holding him back away from Jayden. The both of them yelled at each other, Sarah trying to calm down Jayden from the other side of the parking lot.

Because of the amount of noise outside, people started to notice, includg Jayden’s friends who walked out.

“Diana, call the cops,” one of them said, the dark-haired girl nodding.

“No, don’t call the cops!” Kie said, the girl just looking at Kie like she was crazy.

“You think you can just cheat on her and not face the consequences?!” JJ yelled

“Holy shit, you’re with Y/n?” Jayden laughed. 

“That slut?” one of the girls laughed.

“What did you just say?” Sarah asked, walking to the girl that said it. 

“Sarah, don’t.” John B warned.

“I should’ve known she had a thing for dirt. I’m not surprised, she’s dirty herself” Jayden continued to laugh. 

“Say that again!” JJ yelled. 

JJ was itching to go back at him again, and he knew that if he kept talking about you. It wouldn’t end well.

“I called her slut, is there a problem?” the girl said.

“Yeah, it is a fucking problem. That’s my fucking best friend” Sarah got in the girl’s personal space. 

There was so much yelling going on, the boys were yelling at each other, Sarah and this random girl were coming up, and Diana was on the phone as Kie was arguing with another girl who wanted Diana to call the police.

“She’s all used up now and you still want that bitch? I could only imagine how slutty she is now” Jayden said.

That was JJ’s limit. 

JJ pushed John B and Pope off of him and went straight to Jayden, yet again punching him.

Jayden’s friends ran towards JJ and John B and Pope went to get them off of JJ. The boys have their brawl of three going against four.

Sarah took this as an opportunity to hit the girl in the face. Another girl came up from behind her but Kie went after her, that being the only fair fight of two going against two. Diana was already on the phone with the police. 

Multiple people from the restaurant ran outside to record the brawls instead of trying to stop them. The pogues seemed to be winning, JJ even holding his own when Jayden and one of his friends tried going after him together.

Not long after, the cops had shown up, separating everyone from everyone. Now it was a yelling match between the pogues and some random people on the island. The randoms had visibly more injuries than the pogues did. The only injured ones were Sarah and Kie who only had a scratch. The randoms had blood coming out of their noses, their cheeks were cut, and their lips were cut. And JJ knew he broke Jayden’s nose. They looked like they went through a brawl. While the pogues looked like they got a little dirty.

“Talk shit about my girl again and see what happens!” JJ yelled

“How you tried to fight her when she was already beating your friend’s ass?!” Kie yelled at the girl

“What did you think was gonna happen when you put your hands on him?!” John B yelled.

“Get the fuck off the island!” Sarah yelled.

“Don’t say shit you don’t mean” Pope yelled.

“Your girl? Or the island’s?!” Jayden yelled.

“You should’ve told your friend to back off man!” one of the guys yelled.

“She beat my ass?! Please” A girl yelled.

Everyone was being held back, the officer who had JJ having to work harder than the rest of them. JJ just kept pulling and pulling. He was ready to pounce on his prey and beat him again. Eventually, everyone was in handcuffs. The random guys with each other in one car, the two random girls in another with another random boy. Pope, JJ, and John B in one car, Sarah and Kie in another.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

You were watching tv as you were eating your cereal. Sarah or Kie texted you that they be free and JJ was with them so you decided to keep yourself busy. You had just cleaned your room and bathroom, so you just needed a little break before you could do anything else.

Your phone started to ring next to you, and when you looked at the screen it was a random number. You usually don’t answer random numbers you don’t know, but something in you told you to answer this one, so you did.

“Hello?”

“Y/n! Thank god you answered. I need a small favor from you.”

“Sarah? What’s going on? Is everything alright?” 

“No actually. Uhm.” Sarah stopped for a second, she sounded like she was speaking to multiple people but went back to you. “We got arrested” 

You almost dropped your cereal, pausing your movie. You got up from the couch and walked to your kitchen. “We? Whose we? Who got arrested? How did you get arrested? Why did you get arr-” 

“John B, Pope, Kie, JJ. We were at the wreck and- I’ll tell you everything. But we just need you to bail us out. Please. I didn’t want to call my dad and he-” 

“Of course, I’m on my way,” you say, putting a hoodie over your shirt but keeping your shorts on.

“You’re a lifesaver, I owe you one,” Sarah said, the stress coming off of her shoulders.

“Don’t even worry about it. I’ll be there as quick as I can, alright?” You say putting on your shoes.

“We’ll be waiting,” Sarah said before hanging up.

You drove as quickly as you could to the Wreck. Grabbing something in your car before, getting out, and seeing Kie’s mom immediately. “Hi, uhm. I don’t know if you heard about Kie yet or not. But if you did don’t worry about it, I’m getting everything solved right now. But did they leave anything behind?” you ask her.

Kie’s mom nodded and made you follow her to the back, “This is Sarah’s phone and John B’s keys. I don’t how you get it done, just get them home. Safely” she responded, you nodded and quickly walked out.

You got in the twinkie instead, you knew you wouldn’t be able to fit all of the pogues in your car. You drove to the Sheriff’s department quickly, once you parked, and quickly walked in and went straight to Shoupe’s office.

The receptionist tried calling you to stop you but you didn’t care, when you walked into his office and the receptionist tried to stop you, Sheriff Shoupe stopped her.

“That’s alright, She can stay,” he said, putting his hand up to defend you. She huffed and walked back to where she usually sat. “What can I do for you today, pum-”

“I know you have my friends. I want them back” You say in a stern voice.

Shoupe sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“You want your friends back” he repeats, more so for himself than for you. “Do you even know what they did? They got into a brawl with people from the mainland. This isn’t some stupid prank, JJ broke a boy’s nose”

You closed your eyes and breathed in and out. You knew the people from the mainland were Jayden and his friends. And you knew the boy JJ broke his nose was Jayden.

“And where are the people from the mainland now? Running free while my friends are-”

“They’re here with them if you would like to see them,” he said.

You ran a hand through your hair, you didn’t want to see them. Shoupe knew you were starting to get stressed.

“Y/n, does your mom know you’re here right now?”

You laughed at that, he was trying to scare you with your mom. She would be upset you were there, and she would be even more upset that you went to bail your friends out. But you didn’t care about that, not right now anyway. 

“Can’t I just bail my friends out? Don’t make this more difficult than it has to be”

“There’s a lot of paperwork that involves an adult. I’m sure you know that by now with JJ. I don’t think you would want to deal with that again. So Miss Y/l/n. You may leave my office right now” Shoupe said going back to his computer. 

You threw an orange envelope on his desk. Shoupe stopped what he was doing and looked at it. “What is this?” he asked

“Ten thousand dollars. Three thousand three hundred for my friends. Four thousand seventy for the mainlands. The rest of the two thousand, seven hundred, and forty dollars goes to you and the money you can use to make sure this incident isn’t on their records. On my friend’s records.”

“Are you bribing me, Miss Y/l/n?”

“I’m helping my friends. Ten thousand is my only and final number” You warned him. 

Shoupe was in thought, he was thinking about the choices he had here. He then spoke into one of those police speakers, “let the kids out. All of them” he said, you smiled and walked out of his office. 

None of the pogues went through the system and all of this was being kept off of their record, they were safe another day. Sarah was the first to walk out, running and hugging you when she saw you.

“You’re the best” she whispered in your ear. 

“Yeah I know” you laughed. 

Kie walked out after, also hugging you. “Oh my god, I love you and your money,” she said, you laugh at her, “I love you too I guess’ you say with a smile on your face.

The three of you walk outside, Sarah explaining what happened, Kie adding to her story. The three of you leaned against the twinkie so the rest of the pogues could see you guys. And they did, all three of them coming out at the same time.

“I knew you would come in handy,” John B said, 

“Yeah yeah, get in the passenger. I’m driving” you respond.

John B nods and the rest of the pogues get in the back, talking over each other trying to tell you the story. Everyone except JJ was quiet. Too quiet. He would glance at you but nothing more.

You were about to walk into the driver’s side but saw Jayden and his friends walking out. “Stay here” you mumbled. 

Everyone but JJ was calling you back as you started to walk to Jayden. Once you were finally in his view he scoffed.

“You got your friends to gang up on us?” Alana asked.

“No, I didn’t. But from what heard, it was a fair fight. If anything you guys had the upper hand, there was more of you” you respond.

“It doesn’t matter, what does matter is the lawsuit they’re gonna be bombarded with,” Jayden said, warning you.

“That’s what I came here for. You won’t be pressing charges” 

“And why’s that?” Jayden asked, amused.

“Who do you think paid for your bond? I do something for you, you do something for me, and don’t press charges” You explain.

The rest of his friends stood quiet. “Your boyfriend broke my nose” Jayden argued with you.

“And you deserved it, if not more.” You got close in his personal space, “you aren’t going to press charges. None of you are. But if one day I find out you are. You’re gonna fucking wish you never saw me at the Wreck the first time” you say, walking from them and back to the twinkie.

You got in and started to drive to the chateau, the drive there is silent. Too silent. You don’t know how you’ll get your car back from the wreck but, you’ll get it eventually. When you arrive at the chateau and when John B opens the back door, JJ is the first to run out, saying he needs a shower.

 The rest of the pogues followed him inside, Pope sitting on the couch, Sarah and John B whispering things to each other, and Kie pacing back and forth. You were still here though, but your mind was just on him. Why did he fight Jayden? Why did he start it?

You needed to clear your mind, you knew the ten thousand dollars in your car would come in handy, but you didn’t expect to finish it in one go. Now you’ll just keep a small amount. “I’m going to the beach,” you say before leaving the chateau. 

The beach wasn’t far from John B’s house, so you just walked there. So when you did get there, you saw down and looked at the water.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

JJ got out of the shower and he needed to talk to you. But when he walked out he didn’t see you. At all. He only saw Pope, Kie was on the phone with her parents, and John B and Sarah were on the hammock. 

“Where’s Y/n?” JJ asked. 

“She said she was going to the beach. I’m guessing she isn’t lying ‘cause she didn’t take the twinkie” Pope said. 

You were at the beach. JJ thought for a moment he shouldn’t go there. He thought you needed your space, your peace. But that went out the window when he thought about it longer. He threw the towel into the room he stays in and walked to the beach. 

He got there quicker than you did because he was running. But he saw your silhouette, he breathed in and out and sat next to you. Looking at the water with you.

“Beautiful isn’t it?” you ask.

JJ just nods. The silence killing the both of you inside.

“JJ”

He hums.

“Why’d you break Jayden’s nose?” you ask, looking at him. JJ hung his head low after that sentence. There were so many things he wanted to say. But he couldn’t.

“Sarah said he was Jayden, and I thought about your bruise. And remember the words he told you. I just had a switch inside me. And once I hit him, I knew there was no going back.”

You sigh, “I don’t need you to fight my battles for me JJ. I can handle them by myself”

“I know that. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry.” He apologizes, finally looking you in the eyes. 

The two of you were quiet, just looking at each other. He never explained why he was so rough to you. He needs you to know why.

“Y/n”

You hum.

“The reason why I treated you like shit was that I liked you. A lot. Too much even” JJ confesses. Of course, it was for a stupid reason, you thought.

“I don’t want this to sound like, ‘when a boy is mean to you, it’s because they like it’ but-” He pauses. “You know my mom walked out on me pretty young. You know I’ve known Big John and John B for like, ever. So when Big John disappeared, I felt like he walked out on him.”

You don’t say a word, letting him have his moment.

“And I had these girlfriends that either cheated on me or randomly left. So I started to just, hook up with people. I was okay with them being meaningless. And then you came along and- you changed everything for me. You weren’t like the rest of the kooks. You were nice and sweet. You were smart and beautiful. You have a future. And you still have those things in you but. I didn’t. I don’t even think I still do.” 

A tear comes down his face and when you go to wipe it away, he stops you, nodding slowly. 

“I knew I liked you, John B knew, Pope knew, Kie knew. Maybe even Sarah knew. But I also knew that you were too good for me. That I didn’t deserve you. So when you first started being nice to me, I thought if I would push you away hard enough, you would realize how bad I am. It didn’t work in the first year. But then I saw this switch in you, and I knew it did from that moment.”

He breathes in and out.

“I know I pushed you too far. I’m truly sorry for what I did to you. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for it. And I’m not excusing my behavior. I just wanted you to have the information before I go further with this”

He pauses for a moment, thinking of what he should say next. One thing about JJ is that he gets into his head too much, and this was one of those moments.

“Just say what you feel, J” you reassure him. JJ looks at you and nods.

“I really like you, Y/n. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. You make me nervous and you make me want to just, keep you safe from the world when i know you can take care of yourself. You make me feel like I have a future in store. Maybe this is love, I don’t know. But if this is love, I don’t want to feel this way with anyone else but you” he confessed. 

You look at him, his eyes so soft.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. But I am willing to try this if you are too. I want to be around you all the time. I want to hug you and kiss you every time I see you. I to be able to call you to mind. I want to show you off to the world. I want you, Y/n.” 

The silence is back again, and it bothers JJ more than anything. He can’t read your mind. With the way you’re looking at him, this could mean you’ll give him a chance, or that you’ll reject him.

You nod at him, “I want you too, JJ.” you whisper.

JJ’s eyes changed, from being so fearful to being hopeful.

“You want me too?” he asks

You nod, a smile on your face. 

“You want me too?” JJ repeats, a wide and goody smile on his lips.

You laugh at him, “yeah” 

JJ laughs a bit and grabs your face and pulls you in for a kiss. For a hard, hungry, meaningful kiss. He smiles into it and you smile back.

When his lips leave yours, he starts to smother you with kisses all over your face, causing you to giggle and laugh loudly.

“I can’t wait to show everyone that you’re mine and mine only,” JJ says more to himself. You giggle at him, “hold your horses. I want a date first” you say

“A date?” 

You nod, “okay, where?” he asks, his arm wrapping around your shoulders. 

“Anywhere, you could take me to McDonald’s. I just want that me and you, where one doesn’t end up leaving the other. And we don’t argue”

JJ laughs and nods his head. “Deal”

You smile at him, he’s listening to you with no further statements or anything to come back with. You give him a peck on the lips and then lean your head on his shoulder. Watching the waves with him as he leans his head against yours. “I could get used to this” he whispers, kissing the top of your head before leaning again.

You smiled, not saying another word to him. This was the silence you loved, the comfortable silence. Now, this was something you could get used to.

again I'm sorry this is so late and so long :(

[bleucaesura]

STOLITZØ - TWO

“F*ck! Moxxie! Get off my a** already. Unless you want me over there on yours *wink* *wink*” Blitzø sassed into the phone as he sat in his van outside of Stolas’s.

“Ew! No! Satan’s sake, Sir! All I’m saying…” Moxxie started.

“I know what the f*ck you’re saying!” Blitzø cut Moxxie off. “See you tomorrow at work.”

Blitzø hung up the phone. He stared down at the screen.

What f*cking business is it of yours anyway, Mox? Just cuz you and Millie have the perfect f*cking marriage, don't project that sh*t like you know anything about me and my life.

Blitzø sighed, feeling a little guilty about his sh*tty thoughts towards Moxxie. Mox was a good guy. He really needed to cut the guy some f*cking slack.

Blitzø rubbed a hand down his face trying to wipe away his exhaustion. He wasn't ready for this sh*t. He looked at his phone and thought of canceling. Just dropping the grimoire on the front steps and leaving.

Just then a text came in from Loona

“Octavia’s mom is being a c*nt so she's coming over to hang. So don’t f*cking come home. Not that you do on the 🌚🍆💦. I don't want you f*cking embarrassing me”

Blitzø smiled to himself. What a sassy little b*tch his Loony was. She made him so proud.

“Huv fun! ❤️😘❤️😘” he responded. To which he got many middle fingers and eye rolls. Yup. That was his Loony. He beamed inside. Satan, he loved that pup.

He sighed and smooshed his cheek onto his steering wheel. Sulking, he looked across the van, out the passenger window to the looming doors of Stolas’s mansion.

Guess there's no backing out now.

Blitzø grabbed the grimoire, opened his door and practically fell out of his van - junk from inside tumbling after him. He walked around the van, then stood leaning against the passenger door, staring up at the mansion. His heart slamming against his chest.

Stop it you stupid f*ck. He said it was no big deal.

Blitzø felt like he couldn't breathe…

And you brushed it off like you always do. Pretended like it didn't hurt that he rejected you in front of everyone at that club.

It did hurt. But it doesn't matter. He's never cared for me as anything more than a f*ck-doll.

Then why did he come to Earth to save you? Why call you, comment on your photos, ask you how your day was, or laugh at your stupid f*cking jokes when it's not part of your contract? Maybe he does care? Even lo-

It doesn't matter! Everyone I’ve cared for or loved gets f*cked over, hurt, or dies!

Grow a pair you f*cking coward! Just TALK to the guy! Look what happened when you actually f*cking talked with Fizz. He doesn't hate or blame you anymore. You were f*cking honest and you got your best friend back after fifteen years!

That… That's different.

And Moxxie. You opened up to the little f*ck and you finally know he cares and won't leave just cuz you're a chuckle-f*cking idiot.

Mox is a tender little sh*t. He’ll forgive anyone. Except his dad I guess… But that dude is f*cked up. Anyway, Fizz and Mox have nothing to do with Stolas!

If you DON’T say anything to Stolas you could lose him and your ticket to the human world.

F*ck off. It’s not about the book. I’m not that f*cking petty.

Oh? You actually care? And yet he almost died and you weren't there.

Shut the f*ck up.

You almost lost him and you were still too selfish and scared to go see him in the hospital.

“I said, shut the f*ck up!”

Blitzø startled himself out of his panicked spiral when he realized he'd yelled aloud. He'd slid to the ground, knees to his chest, clutching the grimoire, tears streaming down his face. He was gasping for breath.

He quickly stood and brushed himself off. He looked up at Stolas’s mansion.

“F*ck it”

He wiped the tears from his face and eyes then stomped up the steps to the looming gilded doors. He hesitated a moment, remembering he was actually pretty early, then he lifted his fist to knock.

The door cracked open, Stolas’s tiny imp butler stepped back, and gestured for Blitzø to enter. When the butler gestured to Stolas’s study, Blitzø nodded politely and headed in that direction.

Blitzø liked to act like he was better than everyone, but in this place, he certainly didn't like being rude to any of the imps on Stolas’s staff. It felt demeaning. To both him and them. He felt ashamed to be served by them in any way.

Blitzø reached the study doors. Normally he would have just burst in. But today he couldn't breathe. He was nervous. His palms were sweaty. His heart was beating out of his chest.

Swallowing the lump in his throat., Blitzø decided to knock. He waited. He knocked again. Nothing.

He pushed one of the massive doors open a crack.

“Helloooo?” Blitzø called quietly into the study.

He dipped his head inside and called again. No one answered. He pushed the door open further and slipped inside.

Stolas’s desk was straight ahead in the center of the room. It looked like it filled the entire room with the golden rising staircase that led to a platform behind it. The waxing and waning of the moon was a repeated motif gilded across the desk and up the staircase.

What's with this bird and the moon?

Usually, Stolas was seated in the high-backed throne of a chair behind his desk. So it looked strange sitting there so tall, stark and empty.

I wonder where he is?

Blitzø had been in Stolas’s study before, though only briefly, so seeing it now, without Stolas’s room-filling presence felt overwhelming and awe-inspiring.

Busts and intricately framed portraits of the Goetia family lined the walls and door passage that lead into the study proper. Blitzø discovered the room itself was larger than his apartment and office put together.

F*cking rich-a** royals…

Books filled shelves floor-to-ceiling on either side. It was more books than Blitzø had seen in his entire life. Beautifully bound. Well cared for.

Stolas loves his books.

Blitzø thought back to the first time they'd met. The adorable little f*ck had been so excited about all his books. Showing them off like Blitzø actually gave a sh*t about anything he had to say then. Blitzø blushed thinking about how cute Stolas had been as a kid. And how much fun he'd ended up having that day, in spite of himself.

Blitzø smiled to himself as he reminisced and looked blankly up at the books. When he saw a shimmer of light on the spines of the books he turned to the far wall to find its source and he realized it wasn't a wall. It was a floor-to-ceiling stained glass window. It began at the top of the small, balcony? Platform? Blitzø wasn't sure what to call it. Another level of the room that sat behind Stolas’s desk that had two sets of stairs leading up to it that looked as if they were arms protecting Stolas’s desk. It seemed to serve as a platform to reach the crazy a** chandelier that hung in the middle of the room.

As Blitzø’s eyes trained up on the chandelier he almost stumbled and fell backward when he saw the chandelier led up to what he - at first - thought was the night sky. It took a moment for him to realize it was just a painted ceiling. Constellations and the deep blue of space. Blitzø crossed to Stolas’s desk in awe, transfixed, never looking away from the ceiling. He felt like he was falling into the beautiful void of space.

Is this what Stolas does? He said he studies the skies and their prophecies. He never said it was this beautiful.

Blitzø stood in wonder. He began to feel small.

He's so important. To be in charge of something this beautiful… So f*cking powerful.

Blitzø hugged the grimoire tightly to himself like a shield. Remembering Stolas’s rescue and his full demonic manifestation. Blitzø had thought he was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. But he'd been terrified at the same time. Not of the fact that Stolas could hurt - even kill - him easily with his power. No. It wasn't Stolas’s power he was afraid of. Blitzø was petrified of how Stolas had made him feel. Safe. Wanted. Worth saving.

How the f*ck could he care for scum like me? When he has all of this?

And then Stolas had rejected Blitzø in front of everyone.

He's ashamed of me. His dirty little f*ck doll…

Tears welled in his eyes. He fought them back as he tore his gaze from the ceiling and the infinite beauty and sorrow he'd found there.

Blitzø’s eyes slammed shut in pain as he remembered Stolas’s tail feathers passing by overhead. The gurney. The hospital. The crowd. The shouting.

“Stolas got hurt bad.” Millie’s words rang in his ears like an echo in a haunted well, beckoning him into its depths.

“He can get hurt?” Blitzø had heard himself say. He’d felt like the earth beneath his feet was sand slowly trying to pull him under. Nothing made sense anymore. Stolas is Goetia. Goetia don’t get hurt. Goetia are basically gods. Weren’t they?

What did I do? Stolas is really hurt. I should have been there. He called me. ME. And I blew him off. I could have rescheduled Loona’s appointment. The f*ck was I thinking?! Oh f*ck. F*ck f*ck f*ck!

Blitzø’s heart hammered in his chest. Remembering that day and every day Stolas had been in the hospital ripped at his heart.

Stop it. Satan f*cking dammit. Get your sh*t together you stupid f*ck. You decided to talk to him so you'll f*cking talk to him you f*cking p*ssy!

Blitzø pried his eyes open and took deep measured breaths trying to calm himself. Once he’d gained his composure, he released the death grip he hadn’t realized he’d had on the grimoire and took another quick look around the room to see if there was anywhere Stolas could be hiding. Or maybe reading and too involved to notice his surroundings.

Blitzø chuckled to himself remembering the times he’d scared Stolas because he’d been too beak deep in one of his books to notice Blitzø sneaking up on him.

But no. Stolas really wasn’t there.

Blitzø stood by Stolas’s desk wondering what to do. Stay there? Go look for him?

Then something caught his eye. A box.

The f*ck is that?

Blitzø looked about the room shiftily. He checked the door to make sure no one was coming. Once he was satisfied, he tiptoed around the desk to get a better look.

It felt strange being on this side of Stolas’s desk. In a strange way it made him feel both smaller in station and yet closer to Stolas.

Blitzø tossed the grimoire on the chair and heaved himself up onto it. For a moment he just sat there. Feeling smug.

So this is what it feels like.

Blitzø ran his palms along the edge of the desk, feeling the richness of it. He felt unworthy.

Sighing, he turned his attention to the box.

There, in the middle of the desk, sat a beautiful blue box. Blitzø reached for it but pulled back abruptly like he’d been stung.

Is that?

Blitzø’s heart began to race as he reached out a shaking hand and picked up the box. He traced the glowing sigil that adorned the lid.

Asmodeus…

Blitzø’s ears began to ring and the whole world dropped away as his vision tunneled on the box in his hands.

He could hear Verosika whispering in his ear, “I told you what this is.”

Blitzø gulped, hands shaking, cold sweat dripping down the back of his neck.

“You know what it does” Verosika purred with venom.

Blitzø slowly opened the box’s lid.

Please don’t let it be… Please, no…

Blitzø’s eyes stung with tears as he looked down at the Asmodeon crystal nestled inside the silken lined box. One of the Lust Demon Lord Asmodeus’s all-access passes to the human world. Usually reserved for his succu-b*tches to do their lust-sucking work on the humans. Stolas wouldn’t need something like this to traverse realms - Blitzø had seen that himself. That meant…

Verosika cackled “Oh you pathetic f*ck! You know what it means! He’s done with you! Throwing you away like the trash that you are!”

Blitzø shut the box, slamming it onto the desk.

No. No no no no no… This can’t be right. We have a deal…

Blitzø started shaking. He gathered himself onto the chair, trying to make himself as small as possible. He wrapped his tail tightly around himself and looked up at the ceiling as tears stung his eyes.

He doesn’t want me anymore. I can’t believe I ever thought… and now he’s just f*cking throwing me away.?

“No…” Blitzø whispered as he stared wide-eyed and unblinking at the ceiling; letting himself be swallowed by the void.

*****

[unlucky-phantom]

Cayde-6 x Guardian reader SFW alphabet relationship headcanons.

So, first post, it's a long one I will say but I tried my best to be as accurate as I think it would be. hope you'll enjoy x

um...warning for swearing i guess. Could be read as gender-neutral, there is a mention of periods but it's barely there so I'll tag it as both. other than that have some good old fluff.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

At first, Cayde is slightly reluctant to show affection in front of people he doesn't trust wholeheartedly, mostly because he's worried you might become a target, not wanting another Taniks and Andal situation. When he sees you can more than hold your own in combat, he is happy to relax a little. (Just a little)

Afterwards, when you two are in public he's not afraid to let people know you're his, he's actually very proud of the fact that he won you over however there's no over-the-top PDA. A stolen kiss here and there, holding your hand, a hand on your lower back or waist, maybe the odd steamy moment somewhere in a dark corner of the hanger as you both giggle like teenagers.

Privately he's incredibly affectionate, wanting to make the most of the very slim amount of downtime the 2 of you have together. He'll follow you around your home like a cat, eager to simply be in your presence. He's always finding an excuse to touch you, sitting together on the sofa? He's got his head laid in your lap. Cooking in the kitchen? He's got his chin resting on your shoulder, watching you, arms wrapped around your waist from behind.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Your friendship with Cayde would likely start after he tells you to take him with him because he hates his job. Much to his delight and surprise you try and sneak him out onto your ship, however Zavala has eyes everywhere and catches you both in the act. After a slap on the wrist, Cayde takes you out to ramen when he's next able to, to apologise for being a "bad influence" or so Zavala says. (he tooootally didn't sneak out a 2nd time to do this).

As your best friend, he's ride or die. He's incredibly loyal, maybe a little brash but you know both of you have each other’s 6, on and off the field. After a while, he's not afraid to show up (normally unannounced) at your home at stupid o'clock in the morning. He claims it's just because he's an early riser, or he was just awake, or some other ridiculous excuse, it's actually because you're the only thing that can calm him after the nightmares that more often than not plague him during the night.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Oh god yes. This man is the exo equivalent of a limpet. He loves the feeling of your skin under his fingers, your warmth pressed against him. He loves them for a lot of reasons. They're comfy, and deep down he misses the warmth of a human body.

If you're hunkered down, cuddled up in one of his many hideouts, stashes or one of your homes, he likes to make shapes on your skin. He likes to be big spoon 90% of the time, wrapping himself around you, arms around your waist securely, a protective gesture, it'll take a lot to coax out of him that he partially does this because if shit hits the fan while you're sleeping, he knows exactly where you are. You can feel the hum of his internal workings against your back, a soothing melody, the gentle vibrations seeming to mimic a heartbeat and breathing.

There are the odd days that cayde isn't big spoon. The nights his nightmares get too much, or he arrives home battered and exhausted, he'll crawl into bed with you without a word, kick off his boots and lay his head on your chest. You let him stay there a while before coaxing him into removing his armour and getting into something more comfortable. Afterwards, it's straight back to nestling his head into your chest, listening to your heart, legs tangled together. He's particularly fond when you gently stroke the back of his head and hum some soft tune.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Deep down cayde would like the idea of settling down, he knows the likelihood of that is slim. It's a dangerous and volatile world and he knows he'll probably never stop fighting. But he fights for the life he could have, someday. He also loves the wilds too much, out on the bleak expanse of Mars, the cold snows of Europa or the various golden age ruins on Earth, the call of adventure is something cayde will always answer, an adrenaline junky at heart.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

There are few reasons I can think cayde would break up with you, your safety being the main one. Maybe an argument broke out about how reckless you were being or how reckless he was being, he isn't known for his sense of self-preservation. Maybe he thinks you deserve better, better than he can give and no matter how much you plead and beg it's hard to change his mind. He would talk to you; he'd at least have the nerve to break up with you face to face. He'd make a point of avoiding you as much as possible after.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Commitment is a tricky one, cayde but he's an all-or-nothing guy. Once he knows you're the one, the one he can trust, the one that can keep up with him, the one he can confide him, then he's there. Cayde wouldn't want to get married soon, the tower is a hectic place and there's always a new threat on the horizon, but he'd promise you one day, when the fighting stops, then, then you can tie the knot. It's a bittersweet promise that you often doubt will ever come to light but right now you have each other, facing the dangers of the system together.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

The first time cayde went to hug you, he accidentally bashed you with his horn, a bright red and sore mark on your cheek. After that, he's a little more cautious with his enthusiasm...a little.

When you’re hanging out together in your private space cayde isn't opposed to the occasional tickle fight and rough and tumble. (He will never admit that he, an exo, has a ticklish spot but you know the truth. Tickle a sensitive patch of silicone by his hip and he's a mess)

But when you're feeling down, the pressures of the tower getting to you, your injured or it's that time of month, he treats you like glass. Like you're the most precious thing he's laid his hands on, swaddling you in blankets and wrapping his arms around you. He speaks in low soothing tones and rocks you gently, he’ll likely order you both ramen and put on your favourite holotape.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Cayde is a big hugger when it comes to those he truly cares about. Most times he plays it off as a joke when he opens his arms and says "Hugs?" But he'll never admit the glee it brings when someone (especially you) steps into his outstretched arms.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Cayde definitely overthinks it. He spends nights losing sleep questioning if he truly feels love or just a ghost of what his human consciousness thought as love. He overthinks saying it to you, it’s only when you're about to do some stupid and possibly self-sacrificing thing on a mission that it's blurted out in desperate panic at the thought of never being able to tell you again. He’ll be grabbing you by the shoulders and you can see the desperation in his face.

After the mission cayde won't mention it unless you do. If you ignore it he'll become a little more reclusive, not as touchy-feely any more.

 But if you do, and you reciprocate his feelings, a stupid grin will grow on his face and no matter where or who is watching he's grabbing your face and kissing you with all the pent-up emotion he's been bottling since the friendship morphed into more confusing feelings, feelings of wanting…well, more.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Cayde is a very self-assured guardian, and he trusts you. He knows that you'd never do anything to betray him...Its other people he doesn't trust. Not that he doesn't think you can't stick up for yourself or know when someone is getting a little TOO cosy, but he will step in now and again. He’d saunter over with his usual charm, an arm winding around your waist. "Who’s this, dollface?" he'd ask sweetly while eyeing the other guardian, a clear message. she’s mine. back off

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

At first, Cayde was slightly worried about kissing you for the first time. Had you ever kissed an Exo before? Would you want to? When he begins to develop feelings for you, he often finds himself thinking about what it would be like if it finally happens, your soft lips against his.... Lips? Face plates? Whatever people choose to call them.

Your first kiss likely happens in the heat of the moment, relieved after a high-stakes mission together and unable to contain himself anymore, his leather-gloved hands find your cheeks, pulling you up into a passionate kiss. It was a new experience, his 'lips' were softer, smoother than you imagined an exos to be. When the kiss finally breaks you are both breathless, gazing at one another.

After this cayde would steal kisses occasionally. He was surprisingly good at sneaking kisses while you were both out and about the tower. Pulling you into hidden alcoves, sneaky chaste kisses while Zavala is turned away giving long speeches about.... something neither of you remembers.

When the pair of you are in the privacy of your homes cayde will take his time, he loves kissing any bit of you he can get to. lips, cheeks, neck, anywhere. Likewise, he loves feeling your lips on him, when you swoop in to kiss his cheek when you're busy in the kitchen, his chest when you're curled up in bed, he's addicted to the feel of your lips on him.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Cayde doesn't get many opportunities to be around children. Often his interactions are fleeting waves as he walks the last city on patrol or when disaster has struck and he's ushering frightened families to safety, trying to treasure them. When you see these rare moments, you don't miss how his demeanour softens slightly but there's a ... melancholy beneath it.

however every month or so cayde gets plenty of time to spend with children..he has to coach his dodgeball team after all. it is very early on that cayde tells you about how he beat Shaxx and convinced the titan to play dodgeball with the children of the Last City. Cayde cant help but laugh when the children he's coaching meet you for the first time and start singing teasing songs about kissing in trees. these are usually followed up by cayde with an over-exaggerated eyebrow wiggle and "you know... I know some pretty good trees" whispered between barely held-back giggles.

Cayde's little team love you and the Hunter Vanguard totally hasn't gotten everyone team shirts. yours may or may not say property of cayde somewhere either hidden or in massive letters on the back, hell say its a printing error...it totally wasnt.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

If you're not both on some sort of mission or patrol, you normally wake up in an empty bed, cayde likely already off to perform his vanguard duties.

If you’re both up bright and early, he’ll wake you with a gentle shake and soft words. His voice is not warmed, up its lower, a little staticky and it sends shivers through you. Once you’re both dressed he’ll make you coffee and ask about your jobs for the day before wishing you a safe day and kissing you softly.

If both of you have a rare day when neither of you has morning commitments, it's the sun peaking lazily through the blinds that wakes you, Caydes arms around you securely. If you try to get up and escape the cocoon of warmth, the response from him will be a groan of protest as he pulls you back towards him, nuzzling into you and murmuring "Stay" and how could you resist such a request?

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Nights where you can stay up late with no commitments the next morning are spent either in a bar somewhere in the last city, hidden away in a corner. or you would spend it in your room. drinking, playing cards, or just cuddling while some old golden-age holotapes play.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

It takes a long time. There are some things even Zavala and Ikora aren't privy to. One of those things being Cayde's journal and ace. He very slowly begins opening up, the charismatic and charming mask slipping slightly to show you the vulnerable and scarred exo beneath. Eventually, after a few years, cayde will tell you about Ace and his journals over a quiet drink away from other prying ears. It's a few years after this that he actually lets you read them.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Cayde inwardly is a patient man. He'll make jokes about how long things are taking, and pester people, normally Zavala but part of being a hunter is control and knowing when to wait for the best moment to strike.

That doesn't mean people don't push his buttons sometimes. He doesn't take kindly to threats or things bothering those he holds dear, namely you. Cayde is quick to shut it down.

You rarely see cayde truly angry, pissed yes, irritated also yes. But angry, that's a rare 'treat'. He's not a loud angry person but the type who when they go silent you know shit is about to hit the fan. A quiet cayde is a dangerous cayde.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Cayde remembers most things, his position as hunter vanguard means he's under a lot of pressure to remember things such as patrols, Bounties and planning the next missions but he'll make an effort to remember dates. Anniversaries, birthdays, and other important dates he comics to memory. He tries to remember your favourite foods so he can surprise you with dinner sometimes.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

You were both so tired. Tried, worn out and stressed. You were returning from a mission that had gone south quickly and from your seat behind him you could hear his leather gloves creak in protest at his tight grip on the controls as he piloted the ship. You'd both been in foul moods, sleep-deprived and aching, the mission had been filled with snappy retorts and growled orders. You hadn't spoken since getting on the ship. The silence was broken by Zavala on the coms ordering for your return, Cayde interrupts, slamming a finger on the disconnect button. "Fuck this" he grows and turns the ship around.

Minutes later you finally touch down somewhere and neither of you moves, he slumps back into his seat. " 'm sorry" he murmurs, not turning to look at you. His voice is quiet, remorseful. You ask where you are, and he signals to the exit of the ship. Once you disembark you find yourself in a forest clearing, a lean-to was haphazardly built against a tree, filled with a few caches, chairs and supply boxes. "Little private hideaway. Sometimes I just...need somewhere" he says leading you to a chair.

He pours you a glass of something, it's strong and warms your throat on the way down. You stay there that night, laid out on a blanket drinking and just talking. Wrapped up in one another under the stars. That's the night he tells you about Andal, about Ace and his journals. The night he truly realises how much you mean to him and how much he can't let you go.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Cayde outwardly is about what you would expect when someone's in a relationship. He's cool and collected and shows he knows you can handle yourself. But inside that exo brain is a totally different story. He knows every mission you're going on location and time. He's committing your ship, sparrow and every detail of your armour to memory, God forbid he ever have to look for it, wreckage or otherwise.

If you're on a mission with him, he's first through every doorway, round every corner and in every room. He plays it off as being the leader of the fire team and thus leading. But really, it's to make sure if there's a trap, a hidden danger or an enemy and you’re both caught unaware it's not you who gets the hit.

If he's having particularly bad days after nightmares about Andal and other lost friends, he might slip a tracker into your gear in case something happens to you. When you found it, you were livid at first. You let him explain, panicked words tumbling out promising it wasn’t out of worry of you being unfaithful but fear of actually losing you in that big expanse outside your cosy apartment. After that, you Make sure your ghost sends cayde frequent updates on your location while you're on missions to cayde.

You've saved Caydes ass more times than either of you can count. Every time you do there's a look in his eye. One that took you a while to decipher but when you did you realised it was a mix of pride and trust. He knows you have his 6. And he'll never admit how hot it is when you get angry at whatever it is threatening his life and subsequently beating it into a pulp just for him.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Caydes' love langue is acts of service and physical touch.

Cayde would try, bless him. He'd try so hard but in the chaos, it would be difficult. Your odd and often full schedules rarely match up but when they do he's making plans, and dates, he's buying you flowers, and gifts.

Everyday tasks like making your coffee, and running you a bath when you return from a long day among others are a regular when it comes to cayde.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He’s incredibly self-sacrificing when it comes to fighting the good fight. Even if it means him stumbling in at 3 am, beaten and tired. This also manifests in your relationship sometimes taking a backseat, you understood of course but that doesn't mean you didn't miss him.

Other than that he is terrible at taking care of himself unless its initiated by you, eating, sleeping and sometimes bathing taking a back seat in order to do his job.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

While he’s not too concerned too much with his looks, he does like to keep looking good. He uses wax on his metal plating and makes sure his armour is in good spec. When the two of you began getting closer cayde began to care a little more. At first, it was subconscious, you were his friend, and he didn't want to look like a scruff. But then he found himself fussing over his cloak in his reflection before he would go to see you and maybe he had even bought a new cologne and hoped you'd get close enough to notice.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

At first no. cayde was certain about that. Until long missions felt longer, when you were away the bed felt emptier. His hand felt barren without his queen of hearts and he realises that you are his safe space, his respite and he wants to be that for you.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Cayde will never admit this out loud, but he loves a little pampering now and again. You heard him mention offhand to another exo about a little place in the bazaar that does an exo wax that he swears by. That evening you surprised him with a home-cooked meal and candles. After you led him to the bed and helped him out of his armour. He was surprised when you pulled out the exo wax, he hadn't directly told you and he won't admit how much it meant. By the time you finished gently massaging the wax onto him, he was asleep, blissed out from the attention and much-needed care.

Sundance ADORES you. Cayde's little light had liked you the moment they witnessed the two of you meet and cayde loves hates it. You and Sundance are little sass machines sometimes and cayde is often the object of your laughter. Sundance loves that you take care of cayde, especially when he won't. Cayde confided in Sundance when he began feeling feelings more than friendship and the little ghost was thrilled. Often when cayde is busy pouring over maps and reports, Sundance will float by you, or perch on your shoulder or lap to keep you company.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Cayde isn't a fan of people who put others down, especially if those people are guardians who were resurrected recently. He has a protective streak when it comes to new lights and finds people who actively put them down or treat them with disdain to be unlikeable.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Cayde is a light sleeper. When you’re out on missions constantly God knows where you need to be alert and ready. This twinned with occasional nightmares and his vanguard duties means his sleep schedule is horrible. Some nights you wake to rustling covers, a bleary-eyed cayde slipping into bed at 3 am, some mornings you find him where you had left him the night before, awake and pouring over maps or reports and some nights the bad coupling in his leg gives him spasms keeping him awake.

He appreciates any attachments at helping him sleep, hot cocoa in the evening as you coax him to bed, holding him close, white noise and even reading to him, he just likes the sound of your voice. And every night after he sleeps soundly.

[thetopichot]

•°♧ Seth Fluff Alphabet ♧°•

7/7. I'VE DONE I'M FREE IM FREEEEEEEE RELEASE ME FROM MY CAGEEEEEEEE *rattles the cage of my enclosure*

CW: Suggestive

A = Abundance Of Love (Are they a loud lover that loves to express their love in many ways or are they a quiet lover that loves those quiet intimate moments?)

He is, without a doubt in sight, a loud lover. He's proud to have ya as his partner & he is not afraid to show it. Expect that man to yee his haw everytime he's with you. You make him so happy that I doubt he would contain it.

B = Brave (Were they the first to confess? If so, how did the confession go?)

He was! He was quite nervous to confess to you since he wasn't sure if you liked him back or not. You guys would throw around playful flirts to each other, but he thought it as silly friendly banter between you two & nothing more than that, which made him more nervous about telling how he feels about you.

He loves you, but for some reason, it hurts so much. Ah, situationships. Everyone's worst enemy when it comes to friends to lovers. Now this is the part where I fucking struggle here since Seth, I don't think, doesn't have his own separate storyline besides Bittersweet & I guess that Camping AU (Which is not canon by the way). For the sake of my sanity, I will be using the Bittersweet storyline with some sprinkles of the Camping AU. Capeesh? Good.

Anyway back to business, he takes you to the bar that you guys met for the first time & practically called you a homewrecker in cowboy terms. He still feels bad about that, lol. You notice that he's a lot more nervous & not showing his confidence demeanor. You ask him, "Hey, you good dude?". His smile says yes, but his eyes & hands are saying no. You catch it since the vibes from him were already like off as fuck.

You take him outside & ask him what's wrong then he just fucking breaks & rants how much he just adores you. He tells you that he was scared that he was just imagining things.

"I love you, I mean it."

He wasn't imagining things, however.

C = Control (Do they take the wheel of the relationship or do they let someone else do the driving?)

I think he would flip-flop between the two. He takes care of you & sets up dates for you two. On the other hand, you do the same & you try to protect him from doing stupid shit sometimes like him seeing a shadow & chasing after it, thinking it's probably Mothman.

D = Dreamboat (What do they find attractive in their partner(s)?)

He loves how sweet you are to him. Despite him being a bad boy, which sorta scares people off & also he's a dick time to time, but you still stay by his side regardless of everything. He loves that more than anything.

E = Empathetic (If their partner(s) was in a not so good mood, how would they cheer them up?)

He would make some soup for you if you needed it, or he would cuddle you to make you feel better. He would say the most reassuring things like "You're the strongest person I know, Sugar" or "I will gladly take a break with you if ya want."

F = Forgiving (If they had a fight with their partner(s), how would they apologize? Or would they be petty about it?)

He would be a bit petty at the start, but of course, being petty doesn't solve a damn thing. It just makes things even worse & since it's you, that's worsens the situation even more. So he gathers up the courage to talk about the fight & how he is sorry.

He hates fighting with you. He hates fighting with everyone, but you're not "everyone." You're his Sugar & he will do anything for you.

G = General (Random Fluff Headcanon)

He has a huge collection of cowboy hats. Well, duh, he's a cowboy. However, whenever he puts the hat on you, you look so silly. He likes it when you wear his hats. You look kissable, lol.

H = Home (How would they feel living with their partner(s)?)

YEEEEEEEEHAWWWWW‼️‼️🤠🤠

Bro already got his stuff in his arms. He can do it he's a big muscle boy. This man has been waiting for this moment. He was just too scared to ask though, but living with you is quite a treat. He enjoys every moment & he's gonna make them all count.

I = Idealistic (What's their personal preference in a special someone?)

He likes sweet hearted people, but he also likes it when someone who gives the same energy back in a playful manner. He says a crude joke & you say one back. Just matching eachothers energy is the best thing he could ask from someone.

J = Jealousy (Do they get protective of their partner(s) when someone flirts with them?)

Oh, absolutely. IT'S ON SIGHT, my guy. If someone makes you uncomfortable & disrespects your boundaries, that motherfucker is gonna yee his last haw when Seth catches them. However, if it's in a playful manner, like it's someone you know & if you're comfortable with it, he does get jealous, but he's not gonna make a big fuss about it. He just brings you closer to him. You're his, understand?

K = Key To The Heart (What is something that will make them fall in love instantly?)

Honestly, letting Seth just be Seth. Makes his heart melt into a big country boy puddle.

L = Luxurious (Do they spoil their partner(s) rotten? If they do, how do they spoil them?)

Yeah! :D He's a biker guy, so ya'll already KNOW. He enjoys taking you on rides on his motorcycle a lot. It could be just a short ride around town because it's nice to get some fresh air or just a long calming ride to find a spot for camping. He loves it when you hold on to him like just straight up holding on to him for dear life.

"Don't worry, I got ya. Ain't gonna let a sweet thing like you fall off."

M = Marriage (How would they feel about getting married?)

Marriage makes everyone feel nervous. Regardless if you look forward to it or not. Especially Seth. He does enjoy the idea of calling you his spouse, but he's obviously nervous about it. This is one of the most important things in his life & he doesn't want to like fuck up so bad that everything is set on fire bad. He doesn't want to end up like his mama or his dad. He wants to be better. For you & him. It's even worse that this motherfucker is scared of commitment which adds to his fear even more.

His heart is in the right place, that's for sure. He just wants you to be happy & he wants to be the best partner he can be. You already know that because he is.

N = Nobility (How honest are they to their partner(s)? Do they hide anything?)

Well, he does try to hide his past. He doesn't want you to be involved with the things he did in the past. Besides that, he is pretty honest with you.

O = Overwhelmed (If they were in a not so good mood, how can their partner(s) help them out?)

He doesn't have the energy to deal with what he had to deal with. He just wants to lay down with you & cuddle. It makes him feel a bit better when he just talks about his feelings & what's currently making him stress the fuck out. He also really likes it when you rub his back & just say sweet nothings to him. He just falls asleep automatically & honestly, he's not complaining.

P = Passionate (What is something to them that means a lot to them that only their partner(s) knows about it?)

Cryptids. Spooky creatures that lurk all around the world. He doesn't really talk that much about it since he doesn't really have anyone to talk to about it because when he does, he looks like a lunatic & that one meme where that guy has multiple red yarns connecting to everything. You, however, listen to him rant about it & he talks about it a lot with you. He plans that one day, you guys will finally have proof that Mothman exists.

Q = Quirky (Something silly that they do.)

There was legit one time that you caught him making a huge ass clue board in the garage. This clue board was trying to find the Mothman. You got mad at him since the garage was a complete mess. In the end, you guys found a perfect place to put it. You got him a corkboard to put in your guys bedroom.

R = Romantic (What is their love language?)

Physical Touch. He really loves being cuddled with. He likes back hugs, kisses, your hand on his leg, hugs, you name it. He loves everything about it. He wants to feel you near him. Not only does it protect you & but it also makes him feel very safe. So technically speaking, you're protecting each other.

S = Sublime (What is the best gift that their partner(s) can give them?)

He doesn't really have a gift in mind that is truly the best gift ever. Well it's actually finding Mothman, but he wants to find Mothman himself. He wants to be the first person to find Mothman & laugh in the faces who didn't believe him.

However, the best gift he could ask for is already right in front of him. You. You're willing to put up with his dorky antics & his nature is something that he can not get enough of. You guys are practically unstoppable & he loves that. You treat Seth like Seth. Like he can be himself without hiding underneath a mask. All he could ask is for you to stay with him.

T = Touching (How do they feel about PDA?)

Well, his love language is physical touch. Why wouldn't he like PDA? You gettin' kissies from him all the time, bucko.

U = Undeniable (Did everyone know about their crush on their partner(s)?)

Despite being a massive dork around you, nobody really caught on. Well, you kinda did, but you didn't really think too much of it.

V = Visionary (What do they want their future to look like with their partner(s)?)

Honestly, he isn't sure. He hasn't really thought much about the future. However, there is one thing he wants & that's you. If he could spend time with you for the rest of his life, that's something he is looking forward to. Also getting a big ass dog. He loves dogs.

W = Wacky (General Fluff Headcanon. Again.)

He almost always forgets to take a shower after coming back from work. You get mad at him & you don't let him join you in the bed until he cleans up. He looks at you with those sad puppy dog eyes.

"Sug, please. 🥺"

But as soon as you offer to join him in the shower, he shuts the hell up & he is already in the bathroom waiting for you.

X = Xaroncharoo (Yes, that's a word. Look it up. In a domestic sense, what are they exceptional at in the home?)

Despite being a mechanic, he is pretty good at fixing some things up within the house. He ain't a plummer, but he's pretty good at fixing up the shower. He doesn't really see as anything different from fixing up cars. He just knows what's wrong with it, then boom, good as new.

Y = Yearning (If their partner(s) went out to get something without them/went off to work, how would they feel about it?)

He'll probably get bored without you & watch some analog horrors or those YouTube videos that go into true crime. When you come back, expect to find Seth snoring loudly on the couch.

Z = Zonked (How do they cuddle?)

He likes to hug you from behind as his head is in the crook of your neck. Or you could just hide your face in his boobies. That's an option, too.

☆ミ Author's Notes Underneath 👇 ☆ミ

🩷 - THE CURSE HAS BEEN LIFTED & IM FREEEEEEEE‼️‼️

Anyway, thank you for sticking with me for this writing challenge. This was a PAIN in the ass to do mostly because SO MUCH SHIT happened to me & stuff has been kicking me in the ass but it is done. I'm free & now as a reward for me, I shall be making my well-deserved trophy.

[solleilx]

SFW Alphabet of Sun& Moon:

Note: Hi, I guess yall didn't expect me writing this lol. Also this is my first time writing SFW of Sun & Moon. Lots of bad grammar and I'm suck at understanding love so it might be bad!! And also Im bad at words hhh, English isn't my first language🤧 Just wanna drop it here for everyone ;p Reader is GN just so some of yall don't feel left out🫡 And I'm lazy and pretty much don't have time so only A to M. Enjoy XD Inspired by: purple-plum-petals!! I'm very obsessed with her writing so check her out

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) ♡Sun: Affectionate, yes I mean like a lot... But only if you're comfortable with it, of course.(Tell him, alright?) He doesn't dare to make you sad or frown at his teasings, it's just...Cruel since it was you. Instead, the guy would hug you, pulling your small form to his chest with that exhaled sigh of his. It’s just his way of showing you that he does care, just bad at showing you his love for you. ☆Moon: He shows his affection by making things for you or comforting you when you have bad days. He knows he can't help much but at least he was trying, he just doesn't like you being sad. He wanna sees that smile of yours, always so adorable and brightens his days. And he would do it until he sees it B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?) ♡☆Sun & Moon: First off, they would be such a great friend. Though, being friend with them both already hard enough considering how they held some.. grudges toward adults. The friendship at first is so so so awkward as Sun always gives you the odd stare, unamused at your presence. And when Moon takes over, it becomes more awkward as the animatronic only ignores you. Never wave, never talk or whatever. •But with enough patience and kindness, they will welcome you with open arms. Tho, having them as friends means that Sun’s nagging will be lessened and Moon will keep his eyes on you in case you’re overworking. They now view you as one of their special friends! (The children do count) C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle? ♡Sun: Mocks you if you ask. “Cuddle? Well, aren't you clingy today??"

But still, he pulls you to his chest when you're about to walk away with a frowning face, saying how you’re so easily to be tricked by those words of his as he runs his hand through your hair, never wanting to let you go. And yet, he knew it was impossible knowing you have so many tasks and cannot stay here that long, the solar animatronic reluctantly lets you go with a strained smile on his face!

"Go do your job. I'll be waiting when you're done. Don't overwork, ok?"

☆Moon: You don’t dare to ask unless Moon wants to. He just wasn’t used to this kind of thing judging how some kids, the STAFF members always stay away from him because of how scary he is. But sometimes, you ask if he wants one whenever he feels sad. And the answer is always ‘yes’ with him pulling you to his chest with your neck on his shoulder. Deep down inside, the lunar animatronic wishes to be loved, he wants the attention that Sun had. He wants to know what it feels like to be surrounded with praises and hugs, not those glaring eyes and the pure darkness, how no one welcomes him and always calls him a monster:<. It’s just...So cold. And lonely (Yall, my grammar gone STOP) D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?) ♡Sun: okay...About the cooking part, he isn’t sure about his abilities when it comes to cooking. He would just stare at you as if you were stupid for asking him to cook for you. Would leave it to you or Moon to handle, he’s out. ☆Moon: Pretty good. Since his system or whatever the fuck it is can access to the Internet, he can just follow the instructions and boom. A delicious food for you. Though, he did a great job, right right?? E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) ♡☆Sun & Moon: No, they actually won’t break up with you. Buttt..There could be a possibility. If you did something bad or just whatever the fuck that is negative or just so incredulous to them both, that will be changed. But well since you treated them both very nicely anddd equally, they won’t and always stick by your side till thick and thin. F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?) ♡Sun: Doesn’t think about it since-! First of all, he was made to entertain children and can’t leave the Daycare so the thought of marrying you...well, never came to his mind. But it’s quite nice..He does dream of being domestic with you, able to take care of and love you, etc... Just some thoughts already made his day! ☆Moon: Doesn’t know what to say about it. Well ..He does like the thought of it but it’s just..he can’t leave and has to stay here like his counterpart, Sun. Yet there's a thought that lingers on his mind... Will you love him the way he loved you? Still, the thought of marrying you, adopting a child and living together in a small house always made him feels slightly flustered 🤧🩷 G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?

Sun & Moon: Very gentle! They both were made to calm the children down if they're panicked, etc...So whenever you feel like you want some assurance words or anything, they're always there.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

♡Sun: Very much like it. But only do it when he has your consent! If you don't like physical touch, he has another way to show you his love, he would never and ever want to make you comfortable and that would be the last thing. I hc his hugs to be very comforting like you can't help but melt when this jester hugs you 😞. And gosh, you swear if he could smirk, he would definitely do it to show how proud he is for making you happy.

☆Moon: Rarely do it. As I've said before, he wasn't used to this kind of thing. But his hugs though, more comforting and warmer than Sun (cause he's a Naptime Attendant), it makes you wanna fall into a deep slumber while being cradled by Moon. Oh how he loves you so much that he wanna protect you from this cruel world.🥲 I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?) ♡Sun: Doesn't say much. But occasionally, he randomly says it in a nonchalant tone. And he would get a bit flustered when you say it back. Sun hates the fact he's such a softie for you when you tease him, maybe because you're his partner. (Yes.)

☆Moon: This guy takes more time to say it. It's because there's always some thought that keeps FUCKING BOTHERING HIM. Is he being cheesy? Too rush? Or anything? Is he being too clingy? Would you think badly of him?

"Moon?" "Hmn....?" He looks away in embarrassment when you notice that he's spacing out. And you asked if he's alright... to which he replies that he's simply fine and nothing more. He doesn't want you to know about his thoughts.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

♡Sun: Gets pretty sour quickly when you're being flirted by other parents. Not at you but at the parents. How dare they do that when you're literally his partner? Shocking, stupid, such things can't be accepted! But it's okay, he can just tell you some kids ended up fighting just so you could handle it. Then he went to the parents and warned them to stay away from you. Making them run away with his threats. You belong to him and Moon only! No idiots are allowed to flirt with you.

☆Moon: Scared the fuck out of the parents with his eyes if they made you uncomfortable, ink ink inkyyy eyes. He can get jealous easily like Sun too and you kinda hmm...aware of that!

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

♡Sun: Can't kiss you because of his frozen ass grin. But would make a 'mwah' sound as he planted a kiss(or put his stupid circle plate) on your forehead, then later would tease you with anything that came to his mind. But his kisses tho...Imagine he has a movable mouth or lips, his kisses would be very warm and always leave you speechless. Always give you kisses every morning or when you two meet cause he's a sucker for your attention and giggles >3. As for where he wants to be kissed, he kinda likes when you kiss his cheeks hehe. ☆Moon: Always so gentle and makes you feel fuzzy inside 🥰His kisses are very comforting, I had to admit like how can you not giggle at it when he kisses you? And he also likes his cheeks being kissed like his counterpart too hehe. L = Little ones (How are they around children?) ♡☆Sun & Moon: Literally good around them cause firstly, they were made to entertain children with all sorts of activities, arts & crafts, etc,...Secondly, they both literally have the patience of a saint around the kiddos(but not for adults...Sad). Sun is very good at handling children and the same goes for Moon. They both are very protective of them and always want the best for every child, ensuring their safety is what they both would do. So if by any chance you want to adopt a child or more, Sun & Moon are the best fathers 👀. So you don't need to worry about it and just let your idiot boyfriends handle it! • M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?) ♡Sun: Gently shake you awake and when you do, he kisses your forehead! Every morning, he always does that just because he's a fool in love with you. Though if you're too lazy to wake up, he immediately scoops you up in bridal style and goes to the kitchen. He never wants you to miss out on any breakfast, it's all for your health after all. ☆Moon: Doesn’t like it much mainly because the light irritates him. He wishes it was always nighttime just so he could cuddle with you, hearing your heartbeat and all. But such things…Well, kinda impossible because you have so many works to tend to. You couldn't stay here that long so it's always such a pity seeing you left. But before you leave, he would give you his morning kisses with his hands cupped your face and put his faceplate on your forehead. And there's his kiss, now go and work, silly! He's rooting for you. N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) ♡Sun: Somehow, he hates nights. Mainly because he had to drag you to bed when you're overworking. Do humans really have to ruin their health? Won't that affect their body, life and ages? Isn't that so stupid...to ignore your own health? His mind would ask this question repeatedly. And yet, your stubborn ass still insists to stay awake, which he had to take your laptop/phone away for the sake of your health. Putting it in a high place just so your tiny hands won't be able to reach it, hah! ☆Moon: After Sun managed to convince you to go to sleep, Moon takes over. "What did I tell you, Starlight...? No overworking at night." He chides softly, giving a soft flick on your forehead as a warning for not taking care of yourself and also disobeying the rules. But seriously, he would just sigh and tell you to go to bed as he sleeps beside you. And if you have insomnia, he would tell you a fairy tale. But little did he know that his voice was enough, his gravelly voice that always comforts you, it always manages to make you fall into a deep slumber as a lullaby song from his chest cavity started to play, his hand playing with your hair while he watches you sleep 0and how your chest going up and down. He just wanna make sure that you're real and this isn't a dream.🥹

[yourlocaltrashcan657]

Mental Hospital AU! Yandere! Attack on Titan x Female Reader ~| Bertolt Ending |~

“B-Bertolt.!” Y/N exclaimed nervously.

”Y/N! We have to get o-out of h-here.” Bertolt said as be carefully grabbed her hand and began to drag her out.

“Hold on!” Y/N said as she pulled her hand out of his grip. “H-how can I trust you..?”

”What do you mean? It’s me.” Bertolt muttered. “Don’t you trust me?”

”Y-your lamp..” Y/N whispered before taking a step back. “It was empty.. there was no lightbulb in there to begin with. So why was it so stuffed?”

”Y-Y/N I don’t k-know w-“ Bertolt began to say.

“Don’t lie to me!” Y/N exclaimed. “What is you want to do to me Bertolt?! Do you want to kill me? Is that it?!” Y/N asked.

”N-No! I’d never k-kill you! I p-promise you I’ll never d-do that!” Bertolt stuttered as he took a few steps forward.

”D-don’t come near me! I trusted you Bertolt! Tell me what you were planning on doing if I went with you.” Y/N demanded.

”I was g-going to take you to an emergency e-exit! Reiner h-has Annie and our other friends in t-the Cafeteria.. I w-was hoping on t-taking you to a s-safer exit.” Bertolt explained.

”Y-You promise.?” Y/N asked cautiously. “You don’t have any d-drugs on you? Or guns?”

”I’ll never try to hurt you Y/N! I promise on my life.” Bertolt said as he rose both his hands up.

“L-let’s go then.” Y/N muttered.

The two walked away slowly before reaching an emergency exit. Before exiting, the two heard heavy footsteps from behind them. Turning around they saw Marco.

”Marco!” Y/N exclaimed happily before embracing him. “Are you okay?”

”I’m alright Y/N, thanks. I couldn’t find Jean anywhere.. I’m really concerned for him.” Marco said. “Krista was able to escape. The two of us got crushed under a pillar but she was able to crawl out and get help.”

“I’m glad you guys are okay. All of the other emergency exits are blocked besides this one and the Cafeteria one.” Y/N explained. “The one in the Cafeteria however is being used by Patients who are trying to escape.”

”Y/N. Who is that?” Bertolt asked as he stood towering over the two.

“Bertolt, this is Marco. He’s a friend.” Y/N said.

”A-Are you her coworker?” Marco asked awkwardly.

”No he’s-“ Y/N began to say.

”Y-Yes! I’m her coworker, unfortunately I don’t get to go for break like most workers and just relax in my office heh..” Bertolt exclaimed nervously.

”You look really familiar though..” Marco muttered as he stared at the tall brunette. “I used to work in Ward 1, I don’t remember seeing you.”

”I’m an assistant. Yeah.” Bertolt said as he opened the emergency exit and dragged Y/N out with him, Marco following after.

”Bertolt, why did you say that.?” Y/N whispered.

”I need to escape this stupid place. I know I’ve hurt lots of people and helped bad people but I want to see something else other than white walls for the rest of my life. I want to see it with you.” Bertolt confessed.

”B-Bertolt.” Y/N muttered before walking off with him and away from the group of Doctors and Nurses.

.

.

.

“Bertolt. I’m hungry!!” Y/N complained as she rubbed her stomach.

”Dinner will be ready in a minute. Could you get (D/N)’s diaper changed..?” Bertolt asked.

”Okay.” Y/N simply said before grabbing her little girl and lifting her up in the air and tossing her up gently.

”C-careful!” Bertolt exclaimed.

”Relax honey! I’ve got her in my arms.” Y/N said as she held the giggling baby girl.

“I’m glad. Could you get the plates out when you’re done?” Bertolt requested.

”Sure.” Y/N said as she changed the baby’s nappy. “Hey uh I was thinking that we could go visit some friends.”

”Friends? What friends?” Bertolt asked.

”Y’know, my old friends..” Y/N said before turning towards him. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen them.”

”I guess we could go visit them. I never thought about that, sorry you had to wait so long just to ask me dear.” Bertolt muttered as he walked towards her and wrapped his arms around her.

”I’m just glad you said yes. Love you Bertie-Boy.” Y/N teased.

”Love you too honey.” Bertolt said before kissing her cheek.

(A/N: I’m so sorry for not posting, I’ve had Writers Block for so long but now I’m back! Hopefully I can get Erwin’s ending done soon and eventually the book will come to an end. Sincerely Author-Chan)

[artbyblastweave]

Due to my schedule I generally only see the new episodes of MAWS the Tuesday after they air, so I haven't seen the latest one yet. That said:

The set-up at the tail end of episode 4 goes a long way towards rehabilitating the traditional 1950s "Lois Lane trying to ferret out Superman's secret identity" plot beat. In the 50s it was just weird superdickery fodder, an extension of the cartoonish sitcom runaround that ate all superhero comics alive from the inside at that time. This iteration of it is more grounded in what's already been shown. In a story that takes itself seriously, there's no way that an antagonistic pursuit of Superman's secret identity wouldn't lead to some kind of disaster. But this version of Lois Lane is A.) pointedly career-focused and Out For Her Big Break, to the detriment of her friends, even if she comes to feel bad about it on reflection, B.) in a position to feel personally slighted because she connects the dots after she seals the deal on a relationship with Clark in his civilian identity, C.) has a specific hangup about people close to her keeping information from her (that's what the scene with the phone call from her father is doing.) The perfect cocktail to intelligently execute a really stupid plan.

And, from the other direction- Clark hasn't exactly been given a ton of confidence that Lois is a person he could trust with information this sensitive, has he? His formative experience with her involved her manipulating him into directly disobeying his boss on his first day on the job because she was so sure she was onto something. She specifically wants to blow open the Superman story for the sake of her career, regardless of how much damage it might do to the guy behind the costume- how much confidence should he have that he'll get any special treatment? Also worth mentioning that the Superman persona in this continuity post-dates Clark having to bust out the powers in public to save Lois and then having to professionalize his persona in a hurry because there was no going back after that; this isn't a long-kept secret, it's an emergent situation that he only sorta-kinda opted into and hasn't totally figured out the significance of. Contrast S:TAS, where Superman goes into his weird situationship with Lois being basically fully informed about his own background and capabilities. Overall the fact that everyone involved is around 23 and all relevant events have happened within a three month timespan is making this work.

On a related note, with the benefit of hindsight- I guess one shortcoming of S:TAS was never having Lois work any of it out on her own time. In theory she was a side character in a show about Superman but she still headlined enough plots that it maybe should have eventually come up that she was dating her coworker in his superheroic identity? Going on picnic dates with Superman in costume and yet it never comes up that he's working at the next desk over from her in his civilian identity? I mean, even if she's making the active decision not to know, or if she suspects but for whatever reason decides to just leave it unaddressed in the relationship-that would say something fascinating about her character, right? About Clarks? An unresolved tension there that always bugged me.

[onekisstotakewithme]

Wedding Invitations

A/N: This ficlet is an unedited little thing I wrote last spring (almost a year ago exactly!) after watching "Enemies", when I started thinking about what everyone who knew them circa that time frame might think... this was the result (see! proof of life!)

_

They’re going over the guest list, sitting by the window so they can hear the distant waves crashing on the shore, when Danny decides to ask.

“Can I ask you something?”

CJ looks up at him, over the top of her reading glasses. “You just did.”

“CJ.”

“Danny, when have you ever held back on asking me something?” When she sees that he still looks uneasy, she takes off her glasses so she can fix him with a look. “What?”

“It’s just this thing I’ve been working over in my head, filling out these invitations… lot of former colleagues on this list.”

“Yours, mine and ours,” she says breezily, reaching over across the table and plucking the list from his hands. “They’re our friends, Danny, what’s so bad about that? I mean, I’m assuming we want people we care about at this thing, right?”

He laughs, some of the tension vanishing from his shoulders, the sun coming in the window catching the silver in his hair. “Right. This thing.”

“You… know what I mean.”

“I do.”

She points her glasses at him. “Remember those words.”

Danny chuckles, and something swells in CJ’s chest like a soap bubble, some glee that she’s tried to suppress time and again, knowing that this is something she’s allowed to have, allowed to keep.

Permanently, even.

“What was your question?”

“Huh?”

“You said you had a question, and then you actually clammed up for once, which I wasn’t sure was actually possible.”

Danny acknowledges the jab with a wry smile, but it fades as he glances back at the guest list. “I guess I just keep thinking about all the people we know who worked with us for years, and what they’re going to think when they get these invitations.”

“I imagine they’ll think we’re in love.”

“It doesn’t bother you?”

“Is that your question?”

“Yeah. All these people we’ve known, people who worked with us and saw us every day, people who will probably be wondering if everything they thought about us was true. Does it bother you?”

CJ thinks on it, pries deep into the archives of her emotions, way back in the day, sepia-toned memories of the first administration, the second, and it doesn’t take long to find the deep swirling black hole of fear.

The conflict of interest had loomed over their heads for years, the knowledge that her friends didn’t want her dating him, she didn’t want to ruin their lives by dating him, and the fact that no matter how much he flirted, Danny probably hadn’t wanted to date her.

But it feels remote now, irrelevant.

CJ smiles, realizing she’s been quiet a few seconds too long, Danny’s brow furrowed with concern as he watches her. “No.”

“No?”

“It doesn’t bother me.”

“… Really?”

“Yes. Really. Who cares?”

“People will think-”

“Really, Danny, I don’t care what they think. I know what happened, and so do you. Besides, it’s not like it’s a conflict of interest now.”

“That’s good, cause I got another question for you.”

“Shoot.”

“Marry me.”

“A, that’s not a question, B, shut up, and C, you already asked me, remember? Hence this veritable tome of a guest list.”

“Veritable tome?” Danny asks, delighted, and CJ rolls her eyes.

“Go away.”

“Only if you come too.”

“That’s called eloping, Daniel.”

“Okay.”

She reaches across the table, squeezing his hand as her engagement ring catches the light. “It really doesn’t bother me, Danny.”

“Okay.”

“Besides, you really think I’d give everyone the satisfaction of making it something tawdry? I’m marrying you. It’s all above board.”

“Sure.”

“What?”

There’s a stupid grin on Danny’s face. “I guess I’m just not used to it yet.”

“Well face the facts, buster. You got the girl.”

“I did. Although why I didn’t win you over the first hundred times…”

“I said yes when it counted, didn’t I?”

It’s a loaded question, one that hangs in the air between them.

Yes to going out with him.

Yes to making the leap together.

And Yes to the last, most important, most on the record question he could ever ask.

“It was the kayaking that got you, wasn’t it?”

“Shut up.”

“Okay.”

They turn back to the guest list, CJ smiling to herself.

“So that’s a no on the kayaking?”

[shanakin-skywalker]

Shanakin's Stranger Things Fic Recs

Stranger Things

🍦Steve Harrington🍦

Title: Do You Have The Soup?

Author: @hannuhbee

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Word Count: 865

Type: Fluff; Drabble

Warnings: N/A

Summary: Not Provided

My Thoughts: This is such a sweet drabble. Literally so cute to the point my heart almost burst.

Link: [Tumblr] https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/hannuhbee/690683013464506368?source=share

Title: With Cable-Knit Sweaters and Freshly Pressed Levis

Author: @cursestothemoon

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Word Count: 5700+

Type: Slight Angst/Hurt/Comfort/Fluff; OneShot

Warnings: Slight steam, some cursing, nothing serious.

Summary: You’re going off to college and Steve starts to feel a little insecure about where his life is going resulting in him saying something he regrets. Robin talks some sense into him.

My Thoughts: I love the writing. The characterization is great and this squeezed my heart in the best way possible. I also love the flashbacks throughout this oneshot.

Link:  [Tumblr] https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/acunningstargazer/690554846766661632?source=share

Title: You Shook Me All Night Long

Author: @pinkchubbiebunnie

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!PlusSized/Thick!Reader

Word Count: 45091

Type: Fluff/Smut, Multi-Chapter(4)

Warnings: Inappropriate Work Boners, Masturbation, Smut, Mentions of Bullying, Mentions of Food, Oral Sex, Blow Jobs, Sexual Fantasy, Face Sitting, Subby Steve, Praise Kink, Multiple Orgasms, Shower Sex, Outdoor Sex, Mentions of Past Steve x Nancy, Mentions of Dieting and Diet Culture

Summary: Steve had never pictured himself eding up here – working for minimum wage at an ice cream shop, wearing a fucking sailor costume. But hey, life catches up to you and plans change. He also never would have guessed that someone who had been sitting quietly in the background of his life for years would secretly be the hottest babe of the century – and in the moent he found out, he had never been more thankful for ice cream minimum wage slavery and the stupid outfit you seemed to find adorable. Set Pre Season 3.

My Thoughts: This is such a satisfying read. Everything wraps up perfectly. There is no major conflict. Just Steve being a simp and I love that for him.

Link: [Ao3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/40074273/chapters/100363440

Title: Boy With Love

Author: @kxnobi

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 4569

Type: Smut/Fluff; Multi-Chapter (2)

Warnings: Smut, Sub!Steve, Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts, Breeding Kink, Dom!Fem!Reader, Dacryphilia, Service Kink, Masturbation, Multiple Orgasms

Summary: Steve got the emotional connection he’s been looking for! But now he’s too nervous to make a move so you take matters into your own hands.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/40685739

Title: Stone Cold Sober

Author: @fairyysoup

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2222

Type: Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Smut, Mild Dubcon B/C Steve’s Drunk, Switch!Steve, Phone Sex, Mutual Masturbation, Intoxication, Mutual Pining

Summary: This isn’t the first time Steve has called you- it’s just the first time it’s led to this.

My  Thoughts:

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/43608471

Title: Hot for Teacher

Author: @handfulofteeth(sonorous)

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 12960

Type: Smut/Fluff/Mild Hurt&Comfort/Angst; OneShot

Warnings: Cunnilingus, Car Sex, Blow Jobs in a Car, Blow Jobs, Porn with Plot, Porn with Feelings, Dirty Talk, Smut, Dom/Sub Undertones, Face-Fucking, Multiple Orgasms, Steve Harrington Really Loves Eating Pussy, Vaginal Fingering, A ‘lil Bit of Squirting, Mostly Just WAP.

Summary: “You know I heard Steve Harringtion can’t eat pussy?” It’s the day of your long-awaited date with Steve Harringtion, and your best friend chooses to drop that little nugget of information right on your head hours before he’s due to pick you up. But surely she’s just messing with you… right?

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/42719895

Title: Have You Seen Her?

Author: @luveline

Pairing: Steve Harringtion x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 27772

Type: Fluff/Hurt&Comfort/Smut; Multi-Chapter (2)

Warnings: Fluff, Mutual Pining, Sick Fic, Hurt/Comfort, Smut, Eventual Smut, Smut in Second Chapter, Penis in Vagina Sex, Praise Kink

Summary: Steve finds out that falling in love can be really, really easy. You find out what it’s like when somebody wants to take care of you.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/43097013

Title: I Don’t Wanna Wait My Whole Life Through (To Say I’m In Love With You)

Author: @kazbrekker

Pairing: Steve Harringtion x Fem!Reader x Eddie Munson

Word Count: 8853

Type: Smut/Fluff; OneShot

Warnings: Fluff, Smut, Pining, Reader Loves Books, And Changes Hyperfixations At A Rapid Pace, Eddie and Reader Are In An Established Relationship, Spit Roasting, Oral Sex, Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Cunnilingus

Summary: You and Eddie start to notice all the things Steve does for you two. Or, alternately, sometimes things that feel too good to be true are true anyways.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/40359996

Title: Her Best Friend’s Girl

Author: @starlight_searches

Pairing: Steve Harringtion x Fem!Reader x Robin Buckley

Word Count: 5534

Type: Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Porn without Plot, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Vaginal Fingering, Oral Sex, Daddy Kink, Recreational Drug Use, Underage Drinking

Summary: Robin watches the wiggling of his fingers, grimacing. Maybe she’s gayer than she thought, but it doesn’t look like it would feel very good at all. Steve frowns at his own hand, and then brushes the confusion away in a puff of smoke. “It’s too hard to describe. It’d be easier if I just show you. “Ewwww. Steve!” Robin slaps him hard enough that he almost drops the joint, but even her disgust is tempered by the high- punctuated by a deep throaty laugh. “Gross, no. Not like that-“Steve’s laughing too, falling over until his hair brushes her shoulder. “No, god no. I meant, you know, on my girl.” He shrugs, like its totally not a big deal. Like he hadn’t suggested something insane.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/42437568

Title: You Shook Me All Night Long

Author: @pinkchubbiebunnie

Pairing: Steve Harringtion x Plus Size!Fem!Reader

Word Count: 45091

Type: Smut/Fluff; Multi-Chapter (4)

Warnings: Season 3 Steve, Plus Size Reader, Inappropriate Work Boners, Masturbation, Smut, Mentions of Bullying, Mentions of Food, Oral Sex, Blow Jobs, Sexual Fantasy, Face-Sitting, Subby!Steve, Praise Kink, Multiple Orgasms, Shower Sex, Outdoor Sex, Mentions of Past Steve x Nancy, Mentions of Dieting and Diet Culture

Summary: Steve had never pictured himself ending up here- working for minimum wage at an ice  cream shop, wearing a fucking sailor costume. But hey, life catches up to you and plans change. He also never would have guessed that someone who had been sitting quietly in the background of his life for years would secretly be the hottest babe of the century- and in the moment he found that out, he had never been more thankful for ice cream minimum wage slavery and the stupid outfit you seemed to find adorable.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/40074273

Title: Hold On Loosely

Author: @eratothemuse

Pairing: Steve Harringtion x Fem!Reader x Eddie Munson

Word Count: 10385

Type: Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Smut, Spoilers for Stranger Things Season 4 Vol 1, Unprotected Sex, Sex Pollen, DubCon B/C of Sex Pollen, Oral Sex, Fuck or Die, Canon-Typical Injury, NSFW

Summary: There’s next to nothing truly known about the Upside-Down, but after you get stuck there with Eddie Munson and Steve Harringtion, you learn one thing; don’t touch the flowers.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/39589479

Title: Come Together (Over Me)

Author: @kazbrekkcr

Pairing: Steve Harringtion x Fem!Reader x Eddie Munson

Word Count: 6327

Type: Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Smut, Porn Without Plot, Vaginal Fingering, Penis in Vagina Sex, Cunnilingus, Blow Jobs, Oral Sex, Face-Fucking, Dirty Talk, Unprotected Smut

Summary: You meet Steve and Eddie one at a time, and then all together.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/48148630

Title: Head Over Heels

Author: @underoossss

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Grumpy!Fem!Reader

Word Count: N/A

Type: Angst/Hurt&Comfort/Fluff; OneShot

Warnings: Mentioned Family Problem, Trust Issues, Angst, Hurt/Comfort

Summary: Steve falls for Robin’s grumpy friend, and he falls hard. Grumpy x Sunshine Trope

My Thoughts: Listen, this was so romantic, I swooned.

🎸Eddie Munson🎸

Title: Play Pretend

Author: @webslinger-holland

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 4647

Type: Fluff; OneShot

Warnings: Sexual Tension, Swearing, Some Kissing, Fake Relationship

Summary: To escape the likes of Jason Carver, the reader has to play a little game of pretend with Eddie Munson himself.

My Thoughts: I am such a sucker for fake relationship into real relationship and this ticked every box for me.

Link: [Tumblr] https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/acunningstargazer/690516408204967936?source=share

Title: N/A

Author: eddiendee

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader

Word Count: N/A

Type: Fluff; Drabble

Warnings: N/A

Summary: Not Provided

My Thoughts: -Sigh- This is honestly so cute and endearing. This is exactly the type of thing I can picture Eddie doing and it’s a short read but I highly recommend it.

Link: [Tumblr] https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/acunningstargazer/690146879466504192?source=share

Title: I Don’t Wanna Wait My Whole Life Through (To Say I’m In Love With You)

Author: @kazbrekkcr

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader x Steve Harringtion

Word Count: 8853

Type: Smut/Fluff; OneShot

Warnings: Fluff, Smut, Pining, Reader Loves Books, And Changes Hyperfixations At A Rapid Pace, Eddie and Reader Are In An Established Relationship, Spit Roasting, Oral Sex, Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Cunnilingus

Summary: You and Eddie start to notice all the things Steve does for you two. Or, alternately, sometimes things that feel too good to be true are true anyways.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/40359996

Title: Official

Author: @Bippot

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 22050

Type: Smut/Fluff; OneShot

Warnings: Mutual Pining, Masturbation, Eventual  Smut, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friends with Benefits, Jealously, Recreational Drug Use, Underage Drinking

Summary: So, yeah, Eddie has a little crush. Between working in the garage, school, and late nights thinking about a special someone, he doesn’t quite think he has the guts to do something about it. But, that’s okay. She might have them.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/40234191

Title: Maybe

Author: @eveatethefruit

Pairing:Modern! Older!Eddie Munson x Younger!Fem!Reader

Word Count: 12000+

Type: Fluff/Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Modern!Eddie, Older!Eddie, Dom/Sub Dynamics, Daddy Kink, Slight DDLG Themes, Choking, Slapping, Oral Sex, Smut

Summary: When the hot older man in the neighborhood becomes a regular at your coffee shop, you can’t help but let your shameless flirting take over. And maybe, the fantasies are reciprocate

🛟Billy Hargrove🛟

Title: Daddy? Sorry

Author: @fbfh(cheweduphoodiestring)

Pairing: Bily Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 5576

Type: Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Smut, Breeding Kink, Daddy Kink, Mommy Kink, Neck Grabbing, Boners, Grinding, Groping, Teasing, Dom/Sub Undertones, Verbal Humiliation, Dominant Billy Hargrove, Forced Eye Contact, Temperature Play, Rings, Vaginal Fingering, Biting, Praise Kink, Degradation, French Kissing, Manhandling, Spanking, Hand Jobs, Restraints, Cervix Kissing, Size Kink, Good Girl, Multiple Orgasms, Misogyny, Nipple Play, Finger Sucking, Belly Bulge, Impregnation, Baby Fever, Dirty Talk, Overstimulation, Mating Press, Primal Kink, Cock Warming, Cum Plugging, Dumbification

Summary: You accidently call Billy daddy one too many times, and he’s now determined to level the playing field and make you a mommy.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/37652029

Title: Cow

Author: @M1nt_Chip

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 13818

Type: Slight Hurt&Comfort/Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Porn with Plot, Eventual Smut, Smut, Bullying, Name-Calling, Mentions of Over Eating, Mentions of Under Eating/Skipping Meals to Lose Weight, Almost Being Force-Fed Something Disgusting by Bullies, Other Slightly Triggering Topics Regarding One’s Body Image, Rough Sex, Breeding, Vaginal Fingering, Nipple Play, Vaginal Sex

Summary: Billy is intent on ‘pavlov’ing your brain into associating the horrible nickname the bullies gave you, into something that’d make you squirm.

Link: [AO3] https://archiveofourown.org/works/47859256

Title: Bully

Author: @billyhours

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 16375

Type: Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Bullying, Overprotective Parents, Strict Parents, Smut, Loss of Virginity, Innocent Reader, Porn with Plot

Summary: Billy Hargrove has a big ol crush on you but he’s kind of an idiot and doesn’t know how to process that so he just bullies you to get your attention. And maybe you like it.

🎺Robin Buckley🎺

Title: Her Best Friend’s Girl

Author: @starlight_searches

Pairing: Robin Buckley x Fem!Reader x Steve Harringtion

Word Count: 5534

Type: Smut; OneShot

Warnings: Porn without Plot, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Vaginal Fingering, Oral Sex, Daddy Kink, Recreational Drug Use, Underage Drinking

Summary: Robin watches the wiggling of his fingers, grimacing. Maybe she’s gayer than she thought, but it doesn’t look like it would feel very good at all. Steve frowns at his own hand, and then brushes the confusion away in a puff of smoke. “It’s too hard to describe. It’d be easier if I just show you. “Ewwww. Steve!” Robin slaps him hard enough that he almost drops the joint, but even her disgust is tempered by the high- punctuated by a deep throaty laugh. “Gross, no. Not like that-“Steve’s laughing too, falling over until his hair brushes her shoulder. “No, god no. I meant, you know, on my girl.” He shrugs, like its totally not a big deal. Like he hadn’t suggested something insane.

*Header Photo is NOT Mine. Credit to Owner.

**Will Continue to Update with More Recommendations

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

Not what you think

Masterlist

A/N: Lately, I've been in a sour mood - apparently - and I got into a nasty habit to continuously hurt my boys. Then, @geralts-yenn sent me this fun little prompt - and it just had to be Mike because I've been putting that boy through it, lately, holy shit. So here! Have some more (even more) Mikey fluff...

Pairing: Mike (Hellraiser) x reader (Specifically German!reader, I guess)

Summary: When Mike comes home, you're looking to pick a fight. Until it turns out he hasn't been sneaking around. Well... Not like that, anyway.

Word count: 656

Warnings: None. A little angst. Some German...

@geralts-yenn @deandoesthingstome @ellethespaceunicorn @peaches1958 @sillyrabbit81 @peyton-warren @summersong69 @mayloma @livisss

You looked at him, tears in your eyes. Your entire vacation together hinged on what was going to come out of Mike’s mouth in response to the question you were terrified to ask. In fact, you had been scared to death to even breach the subject for weeks now, but you knew you had to. If he was the lying, cheating bastard you thought he was, he could forget about coming with you on your trip to visit your family. And he could forget about your fantastic home cooking and your fabulous ass. And about you in general. In fact... He could fuck all the way off and never return.  

“What the fuck is going on with you, Mike? You haven’t been yourself lately. And the sneaking around... Are you cheating on me?” Fuck. Too many words... And did you have to sound so desperate? What happened to 'staying strong' and ‘getting to the bottom of this’ and several other girlboss power phrases your friends had thrown at you when you had discussed the situation.  

“No,” Mike said, his voice lacking any emotion. “How can you even think that?”  

Guilt hit you right in the gut. Hard. How could you? Mike would never do that... Would he? You had your reasons to be suspicious... Exhibit A: he had been very distant lately. Exhibit B: regular, unexplained cash withdrawals. Exhibit C: for weeks now, he had been feeding you bullshit about working late, when you knew for a fact that he hadn’t been working any of the nights he said he had been. What the fuck else were you supposed to think? 

“Alright,” Mike said after listening to you ramble on and on about your proof that he had been up to something shady, “I see how that looks bad, and I didn’t think this all the way through... You obviously weren’t supposed to find out and...” 

“Mike!” you yelled, grabbing a pillow off the couch and lobbing it at his stupid head. “Why the fuck does it matter that I wasn’t supposed to find out? What the fuck are you doing, Mike, if you’re not two-timing me with some skank from god knows where? Which, by the way, I’m still not convinced you aren’t!”  

“Babe,” he said, while trying to wrap you up in a hug. No way you were going to let him, so you took a swing at his arms each time they came closer. Eventually, he caught your hands. “Babe, listen. Babe! Ehh… Es ist nicht was du denkst.” 

You looked at him in disbelief for a few moments. “Come again?” 

“It’s not what you think,” he said hastily, eyes on the floor. Yeah, that’s what you thought he’d said. But… Had he been speaking German? That was impossible. Mike didn’t speak German. “I’ve been taking German classes a few nights a week. I… For when we visit your family this summer. I wanted to surprise you.” 

“Can you say that in German?” you blurted out as you wrapped your arms around his neck, never happier about having been wrong than you were right now.  

“Hm? Dass ich dich überraschen wollte?” He seemed hesitant, clearly not comfortable speaking your native language, but it was the sweetest thing ever. And he wasn’t half bad, either. He had the cutest American accent. (= 'that I wanted to surprise you?')

“Well, it worked,” you laughed before kissing him. “Sorry I ever doubted you.” 

“Nah,” he shrugged, “I can see that it looked real fishy…” 

“All of this because we will be visiting my family? My parents are going to love this!” you said. “You won’t be able to understand my grandmother, either way.”  

“Not just because we’re visiting your family,” he admitted. As he said it, he sounded so guilty that you almost instantly panicked again. The only thing that kept you from spiraling was the tight hug he gave you. “Ich wollte dich eigentlich auch noch fragen, ob du mich heiraten willst.”  (= I actually also wanted to ask you if you want to marry me.')

[garebearandnan]

LITG: The good ole days when girl chats were really good!

Season 2 | Day 1 | Part 3 | Scene 1 | Dressing Room (DR)

Note: Part 3, has over 6 scene changes: DR, lawn, kitchen, fire pit/new bombshell Priya, 3 scene choices next (includes multiple scene options; Lottie's moon celebration with the girls, pranking the boys, or spending time with LI), and the night ends with a really sweet scene with partner on the daybeds. There are a few other mini scenes if you choose to not greet Priya or another sweet scene by the pool when Gary when he talks about missing home if you choose pranking or moon celebration. Day 1 FB was already off to a great start with branching.

Scene 1- Dressing Room

In the dressing room, the girls are getting ready for the first night party. 

Hope: I think it will be really nice to have another girl in the villa.

Hope: More girls, more power, right?

Lottie rolls her eyes. 

Lottie: Oh, please.

Lottie: If the situation was different, sure. But in here? 

Lottie: You know, if a girl comes in now, she'll be the hottest person any of us have ever seen, and she'll be out to get what she wants. 

Lottie: And what if she wants Noah? 

Hope’s face falls.

Hannah: Hearing you say that makes me nervous.

Hannah: I just want everyone to meet their perfect match. But what if her perfect match is the same as mine?

MC (thinking): Should we be worried about another girl coming in? 

CHOICES: a.) I’d like another girl | b.) We need to get use to it | c.) I’m going to freeze her out

a.) MC: I’d like another girl

MC: I don’t think we should be worried. The more the merrier.

MC: She’ll probably be really nice.

b) MC: We need to get use to it

MC: It's all a part of the game. Let’s just make sure we're the best at playing it.

Marisol: I agree.

c) MC: I’m going to freeze her out.

MC: I don’t want another girl to come in here.

MC: If you're coming in now, it’s to only break up one of our couples.

MC: Why would I want to be friends with someone like that?

Lottie: You’re so right.

(end choice)

Hope: It could be a guy, you know.

Hope: Maybe your perfect man is going to walk through the door, Hannah.

Hope: He’ll have glasses, and a cardigan, and a moustache, and…

Hope: What else do you like?

Hannah: Horses!

Hope: And he’s going to ride in on a horse! 

Marisol stood to spray herself with body mist. 

Marisol: I’m imagining him riding shirtless. If that happens, you won’t be the only one falling at his feet. 

Hope: You like a guy that rides horses?

Marisol: I like a guy that’s shirtless.

Lottie: My ex back in Australia was always shirtless. He was so ripped, so I didn’t complain too much, but it was a little weird.

Lottie: One time he came to pick me up for a date and he didn’t have his shirt on.

Grace: What did you say when you first saw him? 

Lottie: Nothing. I just looked at his abs and took him inside. 

Lottie: We never made our reservation.

Hannah: If he was so hot, why did you break up?

Lottie: Oh gosh, he was as thick as a brick. 

Lottie: I didn’t see it at first because I was blinded by the fanny flutters…

Hannah: The what?

Lottie: Um… it’s an Aussie thing, I guess?

Lottie: Anyway, one time we talked about going on holiday and he asked me, ‘What country is France in?’

Lottie: That’s when I knew things were going south.

MC (thinking): Lottie’s ex sounds really stupid…

CHOICES: a) I would have done the same | b) I don’t think that’s fair c) What country is France in?

a) MC: I would have done the same

MC: That’s a special level of stupid.

Lottie: I think that was when I knew we had to break up. 

Lottie: I couldn’t imagine going on a holiday with him complaining every time he couldn’t get Vegemite.

b) MC: I don’t think that’s fair

MC: Why didn’t you try to be understanding? Not everyone is good at geography.

Lottie: I don’t think that’s my responsibility, babe. I’d rather ditch someone than play teacher to them.

Lottie: The roleplay stuff gets really boring, after the first couple of times.

c) MC: What country is France in?

Lottie: Are you serious?

Hope: Watch our Grace. Lottie’s going to break up with you as well!

(end choice)

Lottie: We had to break up twice in the end.

Hannah: What do you mean?

Lottie: He was watching the footie when I said, ‘I think we should take time apart’...

Hannah: I’ve heard that one before.

Lottie: And then two days later he showed up at my house like nothing had happened.

Lottie: Turns out he wasn’t even paying attention to me the first time I broke up with him!

Hannah: What did you do?

Lottie: I had to break up with him again. Louder.

Lottie: Although, I almost thought about taking him back, he was that fit.

Marisol: To be honest… 

Marsol: Sounds like it ended for a good reason, to be honest.

Marisol: I could never take someone back. Could you?

MC (thinking): Have I ever taken an ex back?

CHOICES: a)No, I only give people one chance | b)No, but I wish I could | c)Yeah, I have

a) MC: No, I only give people once chance. 

Lottie: Look at you with that attitude!

Lottie: I do not want to get on the wrong side of you.

b) MC: No, but I wish I could

Marisol: That sounds like a sad story. The one that got away?

MC: Yeah. I always wished we hadn’t broken up at all.

Hope: Well I can’t think of a better way to get over someone then being in here!

c) MC: Yeah, I have.

Hannah: And it still didn't work out?

MC: I’m single and on Love Island, so…

(end choice)

Hannah: I’m worried about what it will be like here. I can’t imagine how hard breaking up will be.

Marisol: You’ll have to see them every day. That’s a lot of difficult emotions to process.

Lottie: And you have to watch them get off with someone else. That would be the hardest thing for me.

MC (thinking): How would I feel about another girl in here kissing my ex?

CHOICES:  a) I’d be raging | b)We broke up for a reason | c)Depends on the situation

a) MC: I’d be raging

MC: I don’t think I could handle seeing any of you kissing someone after I’d kissed him first.

MC: I wish I could say I was more about group happiness, but I know it would feel like a betrayal to me.

Lottie: I get you.

b) MC: We broke up for a reason

MC: I don’t own a guy just because we kissed once.

MC: If one of you would be happier with him than I would, you should go ahead.

Hannah: That’s so wise.

c) MC: Depends on the situation.

MC: If we’ve just been coupled up for a day or something, I guess it’s fine. 

MC: If you steal him after we’ve been together for weeks and been to that hideaway… 

(end choice)

Lottie: I can just feel that it’s going to happen to me.

Lottie: I trust my instincts and I know one of you will end up kissing a guy I like.

Hannah: Do you think that would happen with Rocco?

Lottie: Depends how you all feel about him, I guess. I still don’t know how we’re all feeling.

Marisol: I honestly don’t know myself.

Hope: Don’t worry about it hun. 

Hope: It’s only the first day, after all. No-one’s attached yet.

Hope: Well, apart from me.

Marisol: Yeah, you and Noah seemed to have clicked straight away.

Hannah: What about you, Grace? Where’s your head at?

MC (thinking): How do I feel about my situation right now?

CHOICES: a) I’m really into Gary | b) I want to get to know someone else | c) I haven’t clicked with anyone yet

b) MC: I want to get to know someone else

** Marisol: You don’t think Gary is a good match? (not 100% sure about this response?)

c) MC: I haven’t clicked with anyone yet

** Marisol: You don’t think Gary is a good match? (not 100% sure about this response?)

a) MC: I’m really into Gary.

Marisol: Interesting… 

Marisol: I’ve been trying to keep an eye on all the boys and see if I can feel out what they’re like. 

Marisol: I think Gary’s type is someone who’s pretty chill and laid back. 

Marisol: You might be a bit much for him.

Marisol: Also, I’m pretty sure he wants someone who puts the group first.

Marisol: Does that sound like you?

MC (thinking): Am I that kind of girl?

CHOICES: a) I think so | b) I don’t think so | c)I’m not sure yet

** c) MC: I’m not sure yet ** b) MC: I don’t think so (not 100% sure about this response? don't have screenshot)

Marisol: Maybe you should chat to someone else.

a) MC: I think so.

Marisol: Maybe it will work out for you guys, then.

(end choice)

Marisol: To be fair, we’ve only just met each other. All this could change.

Lottie: It's good to know, though. I'm still not sure what I want.

Lottie: Rocco seems like a cool guy, but I'm not set on him.

Lottie: We've both given each other the look, if you know what I mean…

Lottie: But I have a feeling we're gonna clash if we spend too much time together. 

Lottie: And I noticed he might be looking elsewhere.

MC (thinking): Who is she talking about? 

Marisol: I’m not sure about Ibrahim, either.

Marisol: He’s gorgeous, but what if that means he’s never had to work for it?

Marisol: I don’t want to find out later he’s totally self-centred.

Hannah: I get the feeling there's hidden depths behind those beautiful eyes.

Hannah: It worries me that we might never get to find out more about these boys.

Hannah: If it’s a girl that comes in, we’ll have to fight for our place here.

MC (thinking): Do we need to fight for our place?

CHOICES: a) We’re a team now | b) It’s every girl for herself | c)It’s not a competition

a) MC: We’re a team now.

Lottie: Good on you, Grace.

b) MC: It’s every girl for herself.

Lottie: I don’t want to be like that. 

c) MC: It’s not a competition

Lottie: It’s literally a competition.

(end choice)

Lottie: None of us want to get screwed over by some rando that walks through the door. 

Lottie: Especially since we already know there’s going to be a recoupling.

Hannah: I’m with you on that.

Hope: I think we're getting ahead of ourselves. Let’s not make a clique.

Hope: We should be focusing on looking our best instead.

Hope: Let’s go out there looking amazing, and then all the boys will want us.

MC (thinking): Hope is right. I’ve got to get my look right if I’m going to stay in the competition.

*OUTFIT CHANGE

Lottie: You look amazing, Grace!

Lottie: If it's a new girl, she's not gonna have a chance.

Day 1 Fashion Board: