#as if the pineapple scrunchie wasn't already enough

[chewysgummies]

Fuck it, Humanized my mer frog-

[imaginationofomi]

Come Together

Twenty

Light woke her up. It was a faint hint, like the sun was just beginning its daily ascent. A weighty head rested on her neck and collar bone, breathing heavily with an occasional snore. Half of his body covered hers, his hand laid on her bare ribs and one leg wedged between her knees. She rubbed his taper and kissed his head, closing her eyes contently.

There was no asking for a better morning. Nothing past or current could beat it. The future probably would, but she was living in the present. She touched the top of his back, grazing his skin with the tips of her fingers. He stirred in her arms but remained sleep, exhaling slowly through parted lips.

Nayeli started to doze off until Ezra shifted. She felt the heat on her leg first then the firm outline of his dick began to dig into her flesh as he pulled her closer and kissed on her neck. He mumbled something and settled after a few seconds, his breathing pattern regulating while hers picked up. It was there again, that tug of war in her chest.

They hadn't done much besides kissing and cuddling, some soft petting here and there. She was hesitant to take that leap into the pond she couldn't see the bottom of. The thought of sharing her body with another man made her nervous despite that man being Ezra. She trusted him. She cared for him. She loved him. But deep in her gut, she knew that she wasn't confident enough to take that step. She wanted to be. She just wasn't there.

He never pushed her, allowing her to control how far they went and when it was time to separate. She felt a range of emotions from guilt to desire and shame. She was grown as hell with her life together, but when it came to sex, she was an amateur and felt as much. She worried that she wouldn't be able to satisfy him, knowing that his experiences vastly outranked hers. All of her knowledge was curated for one man's pleasure, and without that she was already years behind the curve.

Looking up at the ceiling, she sighed quietly, wiggling her body out from underneath his and tip toeing into her bathroom. She closed the door before she flipped the light on and stared in the mirror. Hair in a pineapple, some of her curls flopped against against her forehead. A few had escaped the satin scrunchie and sat on her neck.

She turned on the sink and dipped her head under the faucet, rinsing the stale feeling from her mouth before she wet her toothbrush and covered the bristles with Crest 3D White. Minutes later, she peeked into her room to see if Ezra was still asleep. He'd replaced her body with a pillow, and she kept quiet as she pulled on a pair of tights and a warmer shirt, grabbing her yoga mat from the corner of the room and slipping into her backyard.

Cold and wet air made her shiver and think twice about remaining outside. She tried to jog in place to help warm her muscles up, but her iron deficiency won. She walked back in the house and rearranged her living room furniture, making a spot for her morning yoga in front of the TV.

Her mind was supposed to be clear and calm, but like the rest of her muscles, it was filled with anxiety and uncertainty. She didn't like questioning herself. She'd always had confidence, always knew that she was one of one, but so were a bunch of other women. And her man wasn't regular.

He had his pick of the best of the best; women that made it their life's mission to fuck men well so that they were provided for. How could she compete? How could she bring that man to his knees so he wouldn't go looking elsewhere? Simple answer, she couldn't.

Knot in her stomach, she finished with five minutes of meditation and some breath work. Neither helped. Laying on her back with her hands rested on her stomach, she spent some time trying to convince herself that she hadn't made a mistake by waiting so long to experience physical intimacy. In a perfect world, everyone would wait for their forever partner, and there would be no need for comparisons, but they didn't live in a perfect world. Far from it, in fact.

Sex was a big part of a relationship. What if they weren't compatible? He seemed so sure that they would get married, but if she couldn't satisfy him, would they even get that far? If they did, would he stay with her and seek fulfillment elsewhere? She started to feel sick.

"Why you thinking so hard?"

Nayeli flinched when she heard his voice, unaware of when he had the time to sneak into the room and lay next to her. She turned her head, looking into his soft brown eyes that still drooped with sleepiness. He reached for her, minty fresh breath ghosting across her face when he leaned in to kiss her for the first time that morning. Holding his jaw, she shook her head.

"Nothing for you to worry about." It was her cross to bear....and she was a little apprehensive about his reaction.

"You look upset, though."

"I'm not. Did you sleep well?"

"Up until you left me."

"I do yoga first thing in the morning," she explained.

"We coulda did it together."

"I'll be sure to wake you up next time." Her lips stretched into a tiny smile, and she rolled onto her back, staring up at the smooth white ceiling. She really needed to paint soon. Quiet inside her home, the music of the wind chimes hanging above her back porch could be heard faintly as the morning breeze picked up and pushed angry gray clouds across the sky.

Ezra watched her, hoping the hole he might create in her cheek would get her to talk. Something was bothering her, and he wanted to know what it was. He'd been in the process of waking up when she touched him, her fingers awakening every part of his body when she stroked his back, and though his mind was still half shut down at the time, he remembered kissing her neck and mumbling that he loved her. She was gone not too long after that. Had she heard him and freaked out? No, that couldn't be it. They just talked about getting married the night before, but if that wasn't the problem, what was?

"Baby, what's wrong?" he asked, nudging her over to lay on the yoga mat with her. Raw dogging hardwood floors wasn't comfortable for anyone.

"Nothing is wrong. I just...............I'm.......I don't know how to say this without sounding a little pathetic," she said, touching his arm when he put it over her waist.

"You won't. Say whatever you have to."

Easier said than done. Nayeli felt that she was at a disadvantage, and she wasn't sure how to gain the upper hand. She needed to be open and honest, but how could she not be embarrassed? How many women could relate to the insecurity she dealt with? Not too many, she assumed. She didn't want her friends to laugh at her, so she either had to talk to Ezra or keep it to herself. If they were going to be together, expressing her concerns to him came with that.

"I feel like I'm too inexperienced for you," she said quietly and intentionally avoided eye contact.

"Huh?"

"I'm worried that when the time comes, I won't be able to please you."

"That's ridiculous."

Not what she wanted to hear nor did she expect it to come out of his mouth. The knot in her stomach hardened, and she sat up, pulling away from him to stand, "Way to make me feel better."

"Stop it. Come here." He got a hold of her before she could move too far, "That was the wrong thing to say. I-"

"Forget it." Prying his arms from around her waist, she stood and snatched her yoga mat from the ground to put it up.

"No, Nayeli. I'm not saying you're ridiculous-"

"But my feelings are so what's the difference?"

"No! Fuck, just let me talk." She didn't want to. He put his foot in his mouth, and she felt like enough of a fool. She should've kept her thoughts to herself, googled what to do about her insecurities, maybe watch some porn and learn a few tricks, anything but listen to him tell her that what she was feeling wasn't valid, "What you're worried about, it's not possible." There it was again, the foot in the mouth.

"Sexual incompatibility is very possible."

"Unless you're lazy, I really don't think so. I'm not into no wild shit."

"You don't have to be. There are a million different things that could go wrong. Like what if I bore you and can't make you cum? Then what?" It only took two seconds for her to want to punch him in his Adam's apple. Worse than putting his foot in his mouth for a third time, he started to laugh at her, "Ezra this isn't funny!"

"Baby, you gotta relax." He was still chuckling which pissed her off even more.

"I don't like how dismissive you're being right now. Is this how it's going to be every time I express myself? I should to be able to talk to you about this stuff without you laughing at me."

"I laughed because you're tripping over something that's not a problem."

"It's not a problem to you! It's a real concern for me. I explained to you how I felt when you asked me why I waited to have sex. You told me not to be ashamed but you find it funny that I'm worried about how the experience will be for you! Do you realize how fucked up that is?" She was so frustrated that tears welled up in the corners of her eyes. That made him stop, but the damage was already done.

"You're right. I shouldn't have laughed," he said, feeling guilty for upsetting her. He wasn't laughing to be malicious. He just didn't understand how she could feel that way when she made him nut in his sleep, but she didn't know that, and she didn't care to hear anything else that would come out of his mouth. He was going to try anyway, "I'm sorry. I just don't think we're going to have any issues. If we do, we'll work on them, okay? Practice makes perfect." He grabbed her hands, kissing the back of both of them and pulling her forward to hug her. She kept her arms at her sides, face laid sideways on his chest so he couldn't see her cry, but her cover was blown when she sniffled, "Shit, please don't cry."

"I don't like how this conversation went," she said shakily, stepping away from him and wiping her face.

"I don't either. I wasn't trying to upset you." But he did, and she no longer wanted to talk.

"I'm gonna make breakfast."

She left him in the doorway of her bedroom, dragging her feet solemnly to the kitchen and pulling out the ingredients for cinnamon rolls. The work of making the perfect dough kept her mind somewhat busy. She breathed deeply and slowly to keep her heart rate down, whisking eggs and frying breakfast sausages while the dough rose in a covered bowl off to the side.

One of her biggest fears naturalized, she regretted opening her mouth. Every thought in her head didn't need to be shared, even if someone asked. She didn't feel seen or heard, just humiliated by a man she loved, and that wasn't a comfortable feeling. Tiny droplets of water fell from her eyes and hit the counter as she put on a pot of coffee.

Ezra was standing at the edge of the kitchen, watching her and trying to give her space, but he couldn't help beating himself up. He didn't intend to cause her pain. He was supposed to listen to her fears and reassure her, not laugh in her face because he didn't understand or agree with her.

"Nayeli, I'm sorry," he said and walked up behind her, hesitantly placing his hands on her arms and hugging her when he felt like she wouldn't elbow him away.

"That doesn't change the fact that my feelings are hurt. You're supposed to be my safe space. I don't want to be afraid to talk to you."

"Understood. It won't happen again." That was one thing he knew for sure.

"Okay. Get off of me." Her tone meant business, and he backed away reluctantly, not wanting to piss her off more. It was their first squabble, and pushing her buttons wasn't wise.

He retreated to his phone, going through his contacts until he got to the florist he used for celebrations and her weekly bouquets. He'd said sorry twice without acceptance. Clearly words weren't enough. A big blunder required a big apology, and he hoped that she would forgive him because his heart couldn't take her not wanting him around.

Every so often, he poked his head into the kitchen and watched her work. Her face was tight, eyes red and a little swollen, but she moved with purpose. She was finishing the icing when the oven timer went off.

Like all mothers, despite not being one herself, she had eyes in the back of her head. She knew she was being watched, "It's almost ready, Ezra. Stop standing there like a child waiting to be let off timeout."

"That's kinda what this feels like."

"Just go sit at the table. I'll be there in a minute."

He didn't leave, instead daring to take a few steps forward. She set the hot cinnamon rolls on the stove and put the first layer of icing on them, allowing the bread to absorb the sticky sweetness while she loaded two plates with sausage and eggs.

"You will get popped with this spatula if you come any closer," she said when she noticed him creeping toward her. He ignored her threat, evading her when she did try to hit him and gently grabbing the utensil from her hand to set it on the edge of the baking pan, "Man, what do you want?"

"I want you to say you forgive me."

"You're lucky I'm feeding you breakfast. I should've sent you packing. Matter of fact..." She pulled his hands off of her and pointed to the doorway.

"Don't be like that. I said I'm sorry." And every flower she liked was headed her way, including a few that she could plant in front of her house or in the back, whichever she preferred. He gripped her waist, bringing her forward and lifting her chin to gain access to her lips. She tried to resist him, refusing to kiss him back the first few times he went in, but eventually she poked her lips out in hopes that he would leave her alone.

"Actions speak louder than words."

"What, you want me at your feet?" he asked, sinking to the floor until he knelt in front of her, "I'm here, and I'm sorry. I'll never do it again. Forgive me, please." He lifted the bottom of her shirt and folded the waistband of her tights, kissing the skin underneath her navel until he got to her hips and smiling when he felt her tremble, "Please baby?"

"I do like it when you beg," she sighed, and her back arched as he nipped her skin with his teeth. She tried to remember why she was mad because she knew it had something to do with the position they were currently in, but his lips felt too good, and he was kissing all of the right spots. Holding onto her anger became near impossible, and when he reached behind her and grabbed her butt, spreading her cheeks and tugging on the material until she heard the seams beginning to rip, she fully succumbed to his touch.....but only for a moment. As fast as she gave in, her brain kicked into high gear and she came to her senses, "Ezra, get up."

"I'm not done begging."

She huffed and pulled his hands off of her body.

"This isn't how I want to solve our problems, now or in the future. I need to know that you hear me. No quick fixes or sweeping things under the rug, and the same goes for when I piss you off. When I get over something, I'm over it. There's no circling back, but there needs to be understanding on both ends. I need to know that you hear me," she repeated and glared down at him. When he saw that she really did mean business, he stood up.

"I heard you. Laughing was insensitive, and saying that your feelings were ridiculous was, too. It wasn't my intention to brush you off."

"What was your intention? Why did you laugh?"

"You ever had a wet dream?"

"Who hasn't?"

"Okay, so you know what happens. You give me wet dreams. I'm not worried because if you can make me nut in my sleep, real life is gonna be better, and even if it wasn't, it's something that can we be fixed with a conversation and some extra sessions," he explained, "You're solution oriented, and I don't like to give up. We'll be good either way, baby. I promise you that." He hugged her and kissed the top of her head a few times. She was still pissed, but she felt better now that she knew what was going through his head. Those words made more sense than calling her ridiculous. 

"Don't ever laugh at me when I'm being serious again."

"I won't."

☼☼☼

Years ago when Nayeli was still a kid, Francine would tell her grandchildren that gray skies were a time for mourning. Parts of the earth were upset and in need of some TLC. Well, it was gray outside, and Nayeli felt like she needed some TLC.

She didn't anticipate the high amount of anxiety that plagued her throughout the morning and continued into early afternoon. Fine after yoga and church, when her family started to show up to carpool to Ezra's house, where they were going and what they were doing began to dawn on her. For real, not the passing thought she had when it was first mentioned.

They were far from ready to take that next step, and she didn't know how to tell him that maybe they needed to slow things down a little bit. To learn how to properly communicate and speak each other's languages. 

"I haven't seen you bite your nails since you were in high school," Bonnie said, wrapping her fingers around Nayeli's wrist and pulling her hand away from her mouth.

"I don't think I've been this nervous since high school."

"You don't need to be nervous. Everybody already likes him. I'm sure we'll like his family, too."

Nayeli wasn't concerned about her family liking him as much as she was about their opinions on the state of the relationship. She was already in her own head about it and didn't need them piling on.

From his own mouth, Ezra didn't care what anyone thought, but she did. Her people weren't known for holding their tongues on either side of her family. They could easily stress her out more.

"Will they like us is the question," Nana Jean said, touching her curly wisps of pale blonde hair with bony fingers. Just a few years ago, she still had some streaks of red, but all pigment was gone now.

"They have no reason not to."

"Your father's family didn't have a reason not to like me, and they shunned us all the same." Decades later, she still held some resentment. She was young with a young baby and pretty much left for dead after Maxwell's biological father passed. No one wanted to help her, and she learned a valuable lesson about how her people treated others when their actions bit her in the ass. She'd been colorblind because she was in love, but the pain inflicted for years couldn't be healed because she loved a Black man. People held grudges. They were traumatized, and the lack of melanin in her skin lumped her in with a group she didn't support.

"Ezra's not like that, Nana. Neither are his parents. I've already explained things to him."

"An explanation doesn't change the minds of the unwilling."

"Assuming they hate you won't help either. I don't want you to go over there on the defense. He asked for you to be there. If he had a problem with you being white, he wouldn't have invited you."

"Ya never think the shoe's gonna be on the other foot," Poppy sighed, laying a gentle hand on his wife's shoulder, "Darlin', I know why you're worried, but our grandchildren have had to deal with worse. We lost time with them because some assholes couldn't respect the fact that we're family. We've never followed them ignorant sons of bitches, and I don't want to see you feed into the stereotype of thinking everybody is the same, hm? Give these people a chance, Jean."

"Thank you, Poppy."

"You're welcome, but if they don't appreciate a good peach pie, we might have a problem." He gave everyone a much needed laugh break, kissing his wife's cheek and his granddaughter's hair. Nayeli relaxed a little and went into the kitchen to pick up the several containers of desserts with Maxine behind her.

"Nana's got a point. They're probably gonna look at us weird," Max said.

"Ezra didn't look at Dad weird when they met. I told him the back story and he did have questions, but it was more about wondering if they were racist toward us than the other way around. It's impossible for us to be racist anyway."

"I'm just saying that I see her point. Daddy's people treated her like crap, and I get that it was a different time, but that shit sticks with you. Same way the shit we had to deal with sticks with us."

"All we can do is hope for the best," Nayeli said, not wanting to internalize the negativity. Facts were facts, but they all had individual choices in how they wanted to respond.

Three cars deep, they traveled to Oceanview. The trip was getting easier as she learned her way around the neighborhood. She still felt strange when she passed all of the estates, but one day she wouldn't. She made her left turn and let her window down.

"Oh my," Bonnie gasped as Nayeli rolled to a stop at the gate with Maxwell and Leticia driving the cars behind her, "This is where he lives?"

"Yep," she replied, waving at the camera. The gate slid open, and she rolled through, parking in the same spot she had the last couple of times she was there, "It shocked me the first time I saw it too."

"It's just him and his daughter?" Francine asked from the back seat, she, too, amazed by the biggest home they'd ever seen with their own eyes.

"Yeah, most of the time, but he wants a big family."

"How big are we talking? Twenty people can live here easily," Bonnie said, getting out and helping her father stand. He was a tall man, taller than Francine, and years ago, he'd been heavy with muscle, but his body was slowly deteriorating. After his stroke, Tony never regained complete function of the left side of his body. He walked with a cane and still struggled with his speech from time to time. It discouraged him, so he kept himself away. Nayeli was happy that he agreed to come with them. She loved Poppy, but PawPaw was her favorite, the reason she knew several ways to break a man's nose and how to make a perfect strawberry rhubarb pie.

"We haven't discussed an exact number," Nayeli said, waiting for everyone to get out of the cars and slinging her bag of treats over her shoulder. All together, they were a small mob of people. Her heart fluttered nervously as she led them up the walkway. Ezra and Tatiana waited at the open door.

"NAYELI!" Tatiana squealed, a flurry of purple and blue and curly afro puffs rushing toward her. Nayeli made the mistake of crouching down and almost got sent to the floor with the bag that dropped off of her arm.

"Princess!" She returned the enthusiasm, catching herself on the cement with one hand, "You get stronger every time I see you. One of these days you really are going to knock me over."

"Sorry. I just missed you." Tati squeezed her neck.

"I missed you, too."

"Who's that?" she asked, looking at the group of people watching them with curious and questioning eyes.

"My family. That's my mom, Miss Bonnie, my dad, Mr. Maxwell, my grandmas, Big Momma and Nana Jean, my grandpas, Poppy and PawPaw, my sisters, Leti, Max, and Stella, and my nephew, Diesel."

"Hi. I'm Tatiana." She waved and smiled at them, latching onto Nayeli's hand and sticking close. First set of introductions over, Nayeli turned to Ezra and silently thanked him for keeping it PG when he hugged and kissed her. They'd worked through their spat, but she still held some weariness in her heart about what would happen the next time they approached a topic of sensitivity. She tried to push it to the back of her mind so it didn't affect her mood or their day.

Turning to face her family, her free hand took hold of Ezra's, and she went about introducing him to her grandparents and nephew. Discomfort was obvious on Jean's face, but she accepted the hug he offered. Francine grinned widely, grabbing and kissing both of his cheeks as she thanked him for his help all those years ago. Her words came out fast as she recounted the event to Tony who was confused by her behavior.

"You rescued my baby?" Bonnie asked him, not having heard the story herself until that moment.

"Yes ma'am."

"Twice," Nayeli added.

"You've been an angel to my granddaughter," Francine said and hugged Ezra tightly.

"Actually, she's been an angel to me. I'm not sure I deserve her, but I'm grateful that she chose me anyway."

Nayeli touched his arm and shushed him. If they started talking about who deserved what, the conversation could get interesting. Thirteen people deep, they walked into Ezra's home where his family waited for them in the sitting room closest to the door. Carmen was on her feet before they could make it all the way inside, walking over to give Nayeli a big hug and introduce herself to everyone. There was so much talking that the chatter became like white noise.

The cream sectional quickly filled up, and Nayeli sat next to Ezra's grandmother, Dianne, holding the woman's wrinkled hand as they discussed the latest episode of the Young and the Restless. Soap operas were Nayeli's guilty pleasure, and she was glad to have someone to converse with. Dianne was tiny, all white hair and light brown skin with almond eyes the color of black coffee. She had a sweet smile and an even sweeter voice that rasped from old age and years of smoking.

"Where's my cookies and cake?" Brandy teasingly demanded, sitting next to Nayeli's legs.

"In my bag. There's something in there for you, too, Miss Carmen."

"Whatcha got for me?"

Nayeli got up and pulled the containers out of her bag, taking the smaller one over to Carmen, "I wanted to make sure you liked it before I made your birthday batch. It's peanut brittle."

"You are just as sweet as you can be," Carmen gushed and kissed her cheek, taking the box from her hand and removing the top to give the confection a good sniff, "I already know it's the stuff. Thank you, baby girl."

"You're welcome."

When everyone was acquainted and making conversation, Ezra pulled Nayeli out of the room unseen, sneaking her past the kitchen and into the second sitting room so he could greet her the way that he really wanted to; alone with a mouth full of tongue.

He sensed that she hadn't completely forgiven him. She held back, limiting him to a few soft pecks that weren't nearly enough to satisfy his craving for her. Some time by themselves would take the edge off. He cupped her face tight, holding her to him, and warmth spread throughout his chest when he heard her melodic giggle that he loved so much.

"If this is your plan, we should go upstairs. I don't want your mom to find and pop us," she teased, gently catching his tongue between her teeth. Everyone was occupied for the most part, but they were taking a chance at being caught. Ezra lifted her off the floor and put her over his shoulder, power walking to the back stairs so they could remain out of sight, "I wasn't serious!" she laughed when he sped up, one hand on his t-shirt, the other playfully smacking and squeezing his butt and looking up to make sure they weren't being followed.

"All I need is five minutes. Maybe ten."

"Or we could see how long it takes for someone to notice that we're gone." She was joking, but he took her seriously and started to move faster.

"DADDY! NAYELI!"

They didn't even make it to three minutes.

"Gahdammit," Ezra grumbled, carrying her back down the steps he managed to climb and setting her feet on the floor, "Can't have shit in this house." With less people around, he would've kept going, but there were too many prying eyes and ears to ignore the calls.

"We can sneak away later," Nayeli promised, puckering her lips and tapping them with her finger so he knew to kiss her. A quick one turned into two, then three. He gently gripped the hair at the nape of her neck, tasting every inch of her mouth until two little voices interrupted.

"EEEEWWWWWWW!"

Nayeli forced herself away, lips wet and eyes wide with the shock of being caught by her nephew and Princess. Diesel looked disgusted the same way he did when he caught his moms kissing at home, emphasizing the disgust with an extra yuck.

"What's going on?" Nayeli asked, "You guys okay?" They were supposed to be playing in the game room, and there was plenty to keep them occupied, yet they'd come looking for the two adults that were technically unavailable.

"Yeah. I made you something, and I want you to see it," Tati said, walking over and grabbing her hand.

"What is it?"

"Come with me. I'll show you." Ezra already knew what it was. He supervised the process, but he thought Tatiana was going to wait until after dinner to give her the surprise, "Daddy, can we tell everybody to go to the table?"

"The food'll be here soon. We can do it then." Not wanting anyone to overextend themselves, he ordered platters of carne asada, marinated chicken and shrimp, soft and tostada shells, beans and rice for the house to enjoy. The caterers were en route, and it made more sense to hold off.

"But I'm already days late."

"Another hour or two won't hurt. Go play. I'll let you know when it's time."

"Okay," Tati sighed and dropped Nayeli's hand, telling Diesel that they could go in the backyard and kick the soccer ball around or keep playing Roblox.

Knowing they'd likely be interrupted again, Ezra and Nayeli rejoined their parents, grandparents and siblings. Phillip was fretting about not having his own tin of peanut brittle because Carmen didn't want to share, and Nayeli promised she would make him one for the next time she saw him.

Nana Jean and Dianne were sharing cobbler recipes, Poppy adding in his two cents about blueberry being better than blackberry and whether or not dusting sugar on top of the crust really mattered. Nayeli was just happy that her grandmother had loosened up and seemed to be enjoying herself.

Leti decided to be anti-social, sitting off to the side while everyone else laughed and had a good time. Sick of her attitude, Nayeli practically stomped over, "What's your damage?" she asked, trying to hide her annoyance and keep her voice low so she didn't draw attention to the conversation.

"I don't feel like being here."

"Why'd you come? You could've stayed at home."

"That would've been rude."

"You're being rude by acting like you have a stick up your ass."

"I'm not in the mood, Nayeli."

"So what? You were invited. The least you could do is interact."

"Get off my case, please."

"Then leave. I'll get everybody else home," Nayeli said and walked away, dropping herself onto the end of the sectional next to Trinity. She was tired of Leticia's attitude. She refused to share whatever she was going through, but everyone else had to pay for whoever fucked up with her. It wasn't fair, and Nayeli wasn't going to let her shit on the evening.

"I've always loved big families," Trinity said, recognizing the tension between the sisters and wanting to smooth things over, "The noise is great, and you're never really alone."

"You don't ever get sick of people?"

"All the time. Hell, I was sick of EJ this morning. He never stops talking about you."

Nayeli cracked a smile and relaxed, "Sorry."

"It's cute. After everything he's been through, I'm glad he finally found somebody that doesn't have an ulterior motive. It hasn't been easy for him."

"I can imagine, but you watched him grow up, so you'd definitely know better than I would. I just hope I'm everything he needs."

"You are. The relationship you have with Tatiana proves that. She talks about you almost as much as EJ does." In addition to everyone seeing the family portrait that was back on the front of the refrigerator. Tati was proud of her picture and bragged about it being called a masterpiece.

"She already has my heart. I wouldn't trade them for anything," Nayeli said and caught Ezra's fingers as they fondled her curls. She hadn't known that he was close by but accepted the kiss he left on her forehead and returned it with one to the back of his hand.

"I wouldn't trade you for anything, either." Much like his daughter did the last time the three of them were alone together, he wedged himself between the love of his life and his sister-in-law.

"Thanks for interrupting our conversation." Trinity faked a glare and made more space for him on the couch.

"Payback's a bitch, ain't it?"

"That was your momma and your nosy ass sister, not me."

"You mean your nosy ass wife?"

"She was your sister first."

Nayeli snickered at their bickering and let them have at it, excusing herself to grab a bottle of water. Upon her return, Rakim picked and ate candied pecans off a small piece of Sock It to Me cake, asking what her secret was because he'd never had a glaze that good before. She shared that instead of doing a cream cheese icing like some people, she mixed a maple-vanilla one with homemade extract and candied the pecans herself. There were more secrets, but she couldn't reveal all of her tricks.

"So now that we're family, I get a cake every year for my birthday, right? My favorite is Oreo cheesecake," he said, eating crumbs off his napkin until there was nothing left but a stain from the glaze.

"I'm family already?"

"Yeah. I thought that's why we're all here. E ain't asked you to marry him yet?"

"Uh, not exactly." She let out an uncomfortable laugh and glanced at where she left him. Had Ezra spoken to his family about a proposal? Was he planning on talking to her family about it? Suddenly, her heart started to race. She hadn't prepared any of them for that, and she didn't feel too prepared herself.

"I give him a week. Back to the cake. My birthday's in February. You ship to DC?"

"Rock, shut up," Brandy said, steering Nayeli away from him.

"Why I gotta shut up? I didn't lie."

"Ignore him. He's just trying to see if he can mess with your head. Unfortunately, he never grew up."

"He and Max will get along great, then. Two unserious people." Joking made it easy to hide her fear. There was no new information, but there were new feelings. Looking around the sitting room at all the people that gathered for her and Ezra.....it put everything into perspective for the second time that day.

She felt crazy. She'd thrown caution to the wind in the past, but nothing like this. Marriage? With someone that laughed off a huge insecurity of hers and dismissed her concerns? What the hell was she thinking?

The food arrived, and she did what she could to act like nothing was wrong. She smiled when she was supposed to, answered questions, entertained Tatiana until their plates were clear. Every time Ezra looked at her, she only met his eyes for a few moments at a time.

She'd been living in a fantasy land where all of her dreams were coming true, but would that be reality? When the newness of their relationship wore off, would they be able to sustain? She didn't know. Imagining a life together was only one aspect, and talk was cheap. When their bad habits showed up, when they misunderstood each other, when they disagreed, what would happen? Slow sips of water kept her nausea at bay.

"Daddy, can we do it now?" Tatiana asked, sliding off her seat between them at the table and bouncing up and down with anticipation as she pulled on his arm.

"Yeah, you can go. You need help?"

"No, I got it." She disappeared like a flash of lightning with a smile on her face, and Ezra moved one chair over, running his hand down Nayeli's back.

"You okay, baby?" He was hip to her false sense of calmness. The fact that she could barely look at him said something was wrong.

"I'm fine, but can we talk later?"

"Sure." She made him nervous. Asking to talk was never a good sign, and he had no clue what was going to come out of her mouth. Tatiana returned with slow steps, holding a plate with a big frosted vanilla cupcake and some pink and white striped candles in the top.

"Happy late birthday, Nayeli. I made it by myself. I wanted to make you something special since you made my birthday extra special and sing to you since I didn't get to on your actual birthday because Daddy left me at home," she said with a little attitude.

"You had school."

Nayeli's eyes watered immediately, and the dining room grew quiet to observe the interaction. She knew the gesture was from the heart, and it tugged violently at hers. She dabbed her eyes with her sleeve, "Thank you, Princess. I can't wait to eat it." She grabbed the plate and set it down on the table, scooting her chair back so she could hug Tati properly.

"I remembered everything you taught me, or I think I did. I hope it tastes good. We have to light the candles."

Ezra got up to grab a utility lighter and darkened the room after the wicks were lit. Everyone sang together, and Nayeli quickly turned into a blubbering mess. She hugged Tatiana again and kissed her soft coils.

"Happy tears?" Tati asked, wiping Nayeli's wet cheeks with the palms of her little hands.

"Yes. Very happy tears. Always happy tears for you." She was back to living in fantasy land because she had half a mind to ask Ezra for adoption papers on the spot, but that was even more of a reason to be scared. Now that she was a part of Tatiana's life, she had to be extra careful. She wasn't the only one that could end up hurt.