#anyways.. i don't think enough people follow me to actually do any voting but its fun

[swankpalanquin]

rules: list your five all time favorite films and have people vote on which one matches your vibe

(i was tagged by @finitevariety !)

i tag @casadegatos @watchfuldeer and @yunabot and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it!

[bread--quest]

who am i supposed to vote for in the blaseball polls. i want to support you but i am unsure who you are talking about and also i don't know shit from dick about blaseball

HAHAHHAHA YES. THANKS KEPLER BESTIE IM TAKING THIS AS AN EXCUSE TO EXPLAIN

why you should absolutely vote for patty fox/hatfield suzuki/anathema elemefayo in the blaseball ship brackets ( @blaseballshipbracket )

ok so. the thing you (kepler) need to know about blaseball is its fantasy sports with emphasis on the fantasy. Weird Shit Happens And People Die. the fans make up the characters of the players based on the info we're given on the site, which is basically a name and some weird stats. all three of these blorbos are on the new york millennials. you don't actually need to read the rest of this kepler it gets long. all blaseball fans following me do need to read it though. okay onwards

first of all let's talk about patty fox. she is a season one new york millennial!! she has been on the team since the game started and never ever left or died, which is impressive. (only 2 other players have been on the mills since season 1 and never left or died). lore-wise, she is somewhere between "anthropomorphic fox" and "just a guy who's last name is fox", it varies on interp. what is universally true about her is that she runs a restaurant called the sly fox!! it's a pop-up restaurant devoted to new york cuisine past present and future. if i talk any more about this i will start getting weepy about just how new york these millennials are so i'll cut myself off here. anyway yeah she runs a restaurant while also being a really good pitcher and also slowly watching all her friends leave or die as she remains. it's very impressive and a little sad. i love her so much

onwards!! hatfield suzuki came out of the millennials shadows to play for them in season 12! she is a tattoo artist from new jersey who has 4 arms, a lot of hats, and mild prophetic abilities via the tattoos. the tattoos are prophetic sometimes. you have to pay for them normally but if it turns into a prophecy it's on the house. she's generally very cool, good vibes, great at skateboarding. i think the retroactive lore was that patty and hatfield had been dating for a while and were both very excited to get to actually play together? but it might also have been that they just hit it off immediately once hatfield started playing. either way they're very cute and they can be each other's rock in the chaos of blaseball

and then!!! anathema elemefayo!! who is the replacement for winnie mccall after she died via incineration as happens in blaseball. winnie was a season 1 millennial so it was really really sad that they got incinerated but ana quickly won over everybody's hearts. he's a gorgon twitch streamer who wears kamina glasses. she's very confident on stream but offline struggles with anxiety, specifically a lot of worries about making her parents proud and honoring winnie's legacy and generally doing good.

so!!! that's the three of them. so i believe the relationship headcanon that emerged was that patty and hatfield were in an open relationship and patty started also dating ana. ana is not dating hatfield but they are friends. uhhhh. i don't have a ton else here i just think they're very nice. it's a healthy relationship!! all three of them are Slightly Less Put Together Then It Appears but generally okay enough and they support each other and maybe distract each other from playing well by sending cute texts midgame sometimes but such is the millennials way. vote for them. mills win

[glitch-trees]

//The following is very long so there's a TL;DR at the end :)

Hello good people of tumblr! Welcome to my account, glad to have you here. This is a roleplay account for the omens au by the lovely bunfloras and quizb. Any and all posts will be related to that, unless I specify otherwise! Ooc posts will be dignified by two slashes, like seen in the beginning of this post.

If you were part of omens before, you may or may not recognize me from the week of chaos that I shall now be dubbing the unfortunate happenings that once occurred (with various variations). I will not go into any detail of the events that occurred. In fact, I will be so cryptic about it that people who don't know what happened will think that someone was kidnapped and replaced by a clone that then tried to kill the original and his closest friends. Oh wait, wrong au.

ANYWAYS! I was indeed quite active in the week of omens over on Twitter. Same character and everything, @glitch_trees if you want to check it out and learn more about my character. Some of my personal favorite moments of mine are the following:

-Getting the oh-so-elusive Bikeman follow. He was a true homie, he will be missed

-Almost getting burnt alive when a hero set the warehouse I was in on fire

-Making raccoon robots after the racclone fiasco

-Falling into a dumpster during parkour

-Writing on villains with sharpie and putting stickers on them with Phosphor/Lightning Bug

-This sick photo taken when running from the police:

-Hiding eggs all over the city for Easter with other vigilantes:

And that's basically all the notable/entertaining things I've done during the last go around. I should note that I don't consider any of what happened last time canon unless the creators themselves mention it and make it clear that it's canon. So events like vote Bikeman for god, the racclone fiasco, etc. won't be brought up by me a lot. I may mention them once or twice to make a funny haha joke, but it'll be more like a vague reference and I'll treat it like it was a weird collective dream everyone had.

ENOUGH OF THE PAST! It's time to talk about what will be happening now!

I will continue to roleplay as Glitch going forward. Don't know who Glitch is? They're my vigilante omens o who loves inventing, coffee, explosives, and being a pain in the ass for heroes.

They do in fact have a power, but it's not revealed to the public. It's a pretty discreet one, so unless you knew what to look for you wouldn't know what it was. To sum it up, they can control any machine that's within a certain distance from them, with a passive effect of knowing where nearby machines and their parts are (like wires and such). How it works is they split their consciousness, some of it going to the machine they control. This lets them do things like hear and see through mics and cameras. They can change how much of their consciousness they put into a machine, so they can either have a very loose control or go fully into it. Their skill in controlling the machine also changes with how well they understand it. If they made the machine themself, or are familiar with its structure and how it functions, they can get a pretty tight control. But if they don't know a lot, they'll get a lot of fight back. It's still possible to control a machine they don't know, but it's a lot more taxing and time consuming, so they hardly do that. Backlash includes migraines, fatigue, dizziness, nausea, and dissociation. Side effects depends on how much of them goes into the machine.

They have quite a few tools in their kit, all of which were made by themself. Their main weapon is their staff, which is actually a pair of escrima sticks that combine together. They can be electrified as well. They have a laser knife, which is just a regular knife with a button that activates an electromagnetic radiation field around it. It can be used to cut and burn stuff that way. Then they have an eye mask, which is styled to look like one of those LED eye changing ones. But it has an earpiece connected that automatically hacks into police/hero radios so they can listen in. They have some animal robots, mostly smaller things like birds or bugs. Yes I'm keeping the raccoon robots, it was a cool idea okay. They use these to gather information before going into a fight or to distract their opponents. Some smaller things they have include hover boots, wrist braces that have various tools like a grapple gun, and generic tools like flashbangs, bear spray, lock picks, and smoke bombs.

But they're not Glitch all the time! By day, they're Emery Hart, a software developer trying to make ends meet.

They actually wanted to be a hero when they were younger. But when they applied for the academy, they were rejected, the only reason being that their power wasn't "heroic" enough. So, they took matters into their own hands, taking on the Glitch persona and saving people their own way. This might not be set in stone, if anything the creators say contradicts this backstory I will change it.

That's about all you need to know about Glitch! Let's talk a bit about me now.

I go by a few names. You can just call me Glitch ooc if you want. I also go by Apple, which is my regular username. Honestly I don't care what you call me as long as it isn't intentionally rude. I use she/her pronouns ooc, but I get it if you just want to use they/them so you just use the same pronouns for the same account.

I do use tone tags a decent amount myself. You don't need to use them when talking to me, but if it can come across a few ways then I would appreciate them just to clarify. If you don't use them for whatever reason, then I'Il probably ask what the tone was meant to be if I'm confused. If I don't ask and get the tone of your message wrong, just let me know no biggie.

I'm not actually that into the dsmp anymore, mostly I'm just into fan content like this. I do love Minecraft though, and a lot of video games in general. I mostly play Nintendo games, with Splatoon, Pokémon, and The Legend of Zelda being my favorite series. My favorite games are Kid Icarus: Uprising and Undertale though.

I write fanfics! I'm planning on uploading a ROTTMNT oc fic on my main Tumblr. It'll mostly be crack with no real plot in the beginning then lIl decide where I want it to go lol. I also have BNHA and Harry Potter fanfics that revolve around other ocs of mine. The BNHA one follows a quirkless vigilante and the Harry Potter one follows a Slytherin girl in Fred and George's year. They're both on A03, Quotev, and Wattpad, so if they sound interesting or you just like how I write on this page, then check them out! I assure you, you're not missing out on much if you don't know the plots of the source material. Each fic follows its own plotline, and while they might follow canon loosely, there are many differences that make it easy to follow without prior knowledge.

l also do art! I post ROTTMNT art and videos on TikTok along with some other content mixed in, and I post more finished pieces and WIPS on Twitter. If you like any art I post here and want to see more, check them out! That's about all I have to say. It was a big text dump so if you made it through all of it then congrats to you. You have my applause. I'll link the socials I mentioned previously below if you wanted to look into any, so peruse at your leisure.

Let's make this au amazing, and remember to PLEASE respect bun and quiz and all the work they've put into this!

TL:DR: Hi I'm gonna be role playing for the omens au by bunfloras and quizb. I'll be playing a vigilante character named Glitch who can control machines and is just an all around chaos incarnate. They have a bunch of cool gear that they made themself. They use they/them, and their civilian name is Emery Hart. When ooc, you can call me Glitch or Apple, and I use she/her but they/them is fine if you just want to use the same for op and oc. I use tone tags and would appreciate it if you use them as needed. I do a bunch of cool writing and art stuff on other sites which you can find the links to below. Let's have fun and not be weird okay? Woo!

Socials:

Original Glitch Twitter Page: https://twitter.com/glitch_trees

Main Tumblr!

Ao3:

Quotev:

Wattpad:

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@appple_treee?lang=en

Main Twitter: https://twitter.com/appple_tree

[lhyale14]

Compilation of a normal girl in a Country going to shit in Covid-19

It is not surprise that in a Country as The one I'm living , The corruption of power manage, control and If i may said pay more favors than a hooker, Has won in a moment of crisis as Covid-19.

1) SURPRISE SURPRISE..... NOT REALLY

Don't get me wrong, I love my country, MI PAÍS, its mine . I live on it, the people i love live on it and my family died, lived and keep going on it. However I can not  blame the people on it either . We are a democratic Country, with laws, separated instructional powers and the CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT to VOTE, as I said before people, ughh people, Political campaigns becomes a popular contest here to see who have more views, most followers or more money. I love my country but, their people. my people choose the same group of persons that use our Constitution, the prime example of the legal and constitutional right of every citizen to kick out THE President so their congressman , their president took powers as head of State .... Again, It should not surprise me but it does , it shouldn't surprise me that days after Congressmen and political groups open their mouth to said “ If we didn't vote, They (The congress) wouldn't lets us pass projects” , yet it does, I should NOT  be surprised to see people marching on the streets, making noises from their houses , filming the typical police´s brutal force. BUT I AM...  It's a sad thought..A real one. I can said that I will join the protest , but I'm not ... I don't have resources , the strength or the mental health to go out, I am scared. Our health programs and institutions neither were prepared to Covid - 19 a few weeks ago , nor they are now.  I still freaking out every time that food arrives.... Progress take time, I went to buy some groceries close to my house, just two blocks away, then I kind of change only my sweater, yey progress. 

So I´m doing the only thing i can do... Write about it 

2) WAIT.... WHAT?

Yeah I shouldn't be surprised, who could tell , right?. While all this was happening here in USA  was election time !! . How many people, famous people, use their famous social media power to promote vote and make a change in their administration. However as far as I know , we HAD TO  vote  even it we don't see any candidate with experience. political program and plan otherwise we have to paid a sanction, yeyy vote!! .Well, I can said that we without doubt bought, dig up, bury and paid the grave We are living right now ... damm We practically  put the sword of our hangman so he could wait until We were distracted. Without saying the obvious , the american people (north american) got to kick out their president (we all know it . Total Support here), while we were trying to keep ours , yet the people who represent us choose to kick him out so when people respond in the streets to get answers for their actions , They become Violent people, vandalism emerge from their rebel actions, anger became violence in the frustration of the moment when an act that in our CONSTITUTION stimulates as a legit legal right We OWN transform itself in a public disturbance that confronts the legal public order.. Yeah sure, Probably, They didn’t want their show to be disturb , well IT WAS ANYWAY..... Now the whole Country knows , We don't want you, neither of you .We do not acknowledge a President that we DID NOT CHOOSE, we did not VOTE FOR YOU  to assume that position in our government, We didn’t do it, The actual so called President was chosen by their friends that have more votes in the camera of congress.

Yeah, Dont tell us to SHUT UP, TO RESTRAIN OUR RIGHT TO EXPRESS OUR ANGER AND DISCOMFORT TO A DIRTY POLITICAL MOVE TO GAIN POWER WHEN PEOPLE WERE DYING WHILE THEY DID NOTHING BUT CAUSE MORE PROBLEMS THAN SOLUTIONS, o wait no my mistake THEY STILL ARE MAKING MORE PROBLEMS. 

I don't know what will be of us, my normal , limited studies, reading and knowledge of the constitution doesn't make me a legal expert , but I feel you , I feel the frustration of change every single one cabinet minister in a emergency state to put their people than not only change the dynamic of procedures, but it would take at least 2 months for them to understand the legal, economic, covid-19 situation We are living on.Many thing can happen in 2 months , shit every change in 1 weeks . People is becoming more trusting while Covid is still around us. 

I can only Hope that every single brave soul out there are protect enough to fight their battle in a safe and healthy way so when they arrive home , their families will still be safe of Covid as they will.

I’m proud to be Peruvian citizens , to know that in injustice we are one nation, one voice and more import We are telling that people who sit thinking we dont give a shit about it, WE FUCKIN CARE. NOW WE WOULD BE HEARD 

#MerinoNoMeRepresenta 

#ElCongresoNoMeRepresenta 

note: I wrote it in english because i don't know so many curse words.

Lo escribi en ingles porque no se muchas malas palabras que saldrían naturalemte 

[thegreymoon]

Sorry, You didn't really say or do anything to make me think that you are Asian. I thought that I read sth in your lj where u said that you were and just run with it. It was a long time ago and I must have misread. Also, you don't really post a lot political stuff, it is more like I notice it more because when I visit your page I skip all Merlin related stuff and am interested in the rest so again my fault. As for my ise of imaginary- yeah, it was passive agressive, altough not intentionally so

… my bad. I rarely engage in political conversations online because it never ends well, especially when my views clash with 90% of tumblr users so I am used to combative tone and it was unnecessary.. As for SJW I am not sure if that is dissmissive term as it discribes the “movement” well? I am not native speaker and am aware that it can be used as derogative term, but was also convinced that it is used by people on the left if political spectrum. I asked you why you are mainy interesetd in USA because I was working under the assumption that u are Asian it seemed to me weird that a person coming from China/Japan etc would be championing social justice in USA when it not that big of a problem(or at all IMO) whie ignoring very real problems in their own country. But since you are not Asian and you post political stuff rarely you are right it is a silly discussion. The fault is completely on my side. I am allergic to these kind of stuff and you are one of my favourite writers so I exaggerated. Once again sorry.

As for the rest of your response: I also come from relatively poor country that was screwed over by both Britain and USA and many other countries, and I don’t agree with many of their policies (or most) but I don’t hate them and believe that as much as people like to say they start wars for the oil etc it is not really true. There are many political and global players and everyone single country is motivated by greed it is only that not every country can exercise their power.  

Relatively they are not the worst, it is just that since USA tries to paint themselves as heroes they are held to different, much higher standards than other countries. To sum it up, I am not defending their foreign policies, they have done a lot of wrong and are shortseighted but I still think that are better than other superpowers that will soon take over like China or maybe India. Also, I don;t understand why would you include global warming in your answer?why do you believe it is their fault

I am trying to leave as “green” as I can, I am a vegetarian and I believe we should do everything to preserve environment, but I wouldnt want my country to sign any deals concerning CO2 emission as long as other countries do not do the same. Otherwise, they would just cripple their economy and not help the world? As for Trump(if you are still interested) I find him the epitome of self-important, conceited stereotypical american but still so much better than alternative and despite distaste. would still vote for him. Because he at least apppears to be anti globalist and has a much higher moral ground than Hillary. what are his SPECIFIC actions that you find so abhorrent? Anyway, what I alluded to in my message was not politics of USA but the social justcie issues, like support BLM or me to movement(I am not sure if you posted enything regarding that, so srry if I presume wrongly) which I find are absolutely not based on facts and despite that people still perpetuate that, and if u don’t agree you are racist and sexist. No arguments whatsoever. It is also silly to me when I see the posts about the West being this cesspool of sexism while honour killings or FGM is nearly a non issue on social media or racism when considering the West is still the least racist place in the world when you compare it to China/India/SA or any other place. So, I find the social media effort to be misdirected and controlled by emotions. Even the indigineous people issued you mentioned. Americans get so much shit for their history, while pretty much every single country that exist was created by conquering or displacement of the previous population(u just have to go far enough down the history). So, yeah wht happend to Indigenous people and dissappearance of their whole civilization is a great tragedy but not the first and unfortunately not the last in human history. Why are we hearing about it but not about Anuit people or Persian or Byzantians? it is so imbalanced. Ok, anyway, sorry for the rant it shouldn’t be directed at you and tumblr is definitely not the place for it. Sorry if I offended to you. As I said I love your writing, “DC” is my all time favourite fic, and because I creepely once read through all of your lj(including asks and responses) I(like an internet creep and stalker)liked you and thought you seemed smart, well balanced and knowledgeable so I guess I felt entitled to to make the ask. Wish you all the best in life. 

No worries, I’m sorry I came off so aggressive in my answer. I did actually live and work in China for a while during my LJ days and it’s entirely possible I may have tagged myself as being there on my fandom profiles at the time. It was a happy period for me and I talked about it a lot to anyone who had the patience to listen, so it’s very plausible that you have read something about it on my LJ! I’m very sorry if it was misleading, but I was only ever an expat there!

I used to be a lot more open about my real name and real-life dealings in fandom communities, but that almost backfired spectacularly, so I locked down a lot of stuff because it could do me quite a bit of damage. 

OK, I concede your point that if you remove the Merlin stuff, a lot of what is left on my Tumblr is going to be either me reblogging cats or raging about social injustices (oops) 😅

I’d just like to make it clear that I absolutely do not hate either the USA, the UK or any other country in the world. Like I said, people are people, and disgusting policies are disgusting policies and every single country is guilty of them. It’s just that some have a bigger impact and are more visible. My own country is a source of so much shame and anger for me, it far outweighs anything the UK and the USA could have ever done because it’s personal, but our nonsense is just not something that I come across when casually scrolling through Tumblr, so I don’t reblog it. It’s possible to love a nation and its people and still be critical of the evil they have done. 

Also, let me just clarify that I’m bothered by all injustices and human rights violations everywhere, but usually there isn’t a post about them when I’m scrolling at 2 am at night that I can reblog. The USA is just… low hanging fruit, and let’s face it, from where I stand, hating on their president, the white supremacists, the Nazis, fundamental Christians, racists and the Republicans in general after what they have turned into is not hating on the USA, but rather cheering on the sane part of the country to get rid of this toxic waste ASAP. The same goes for Brexiteers in the UK and I am so, so sad for all the people that are going to suffer because of it. 

Of course, I’m aware that China and Japan have issues and human rights violations that are mind-boggling, but again, they just don’t appear on my dash very often, or at least not in English or from a source I can easily fact-check. The Japanese and Chinese stuff I follow is mostly art, nature and pictures of pretty clothes. My knowledge of either of these countries is very superficial compared to Western countries, which impact me directly, so it really isn’t my place to appoint myself as a champion of human rights in the Far East when my own country and continent are a growing dumpster fire that cannot be contained.  

On the subject of global warming, I’m not blaming the USA (entirely, because they, of course, played their part, but so did the rest of humanity). I’m enraged by their governing body’s rhetoric as of late, the denial of climate change, every single action that Trump took since taking office (such as withdrawing from the Paris climate agreement), him making ignorant, snide remarks in the middle of the polar vortex just days ago while people were suffering, deliberately sabotaging scientists and spreading dangerous, false information when each and every single country should be all-hands-on-deck if we want to avert a disaster of global proportions (especially with all the signs pointing to us being too late already). Nobody is suggesting that the USA should unilaterally reduce carbon emissions, all countries in the world must do it and develop the technology to make it feasible to convert to clean energy. And yes, the USA, China and other giants have to lead the way because they are the ones with the power! My poor, tiny country is not the one that can impact anything, so yes, the USA is absolutely more responsible to lead the way forward, but instead of at least moving in the right direction, Trump is deliberately lying and sabotaging all effort because he likes the money he gets from Big Oil companies, and he’s giving a platform to religious nutcases for votes, who think that there won’t be a global disaster of epic proportions in the near future because God promised Noah he would never again flood the entire Earth in the Old Testament. It’s not even the outright evil that is bothering me the most right now, but the mind-numbing stupidity. 

I have nothing but loathing for both of the Clintons. They have caused so much destruction in my country and I do not want good things for either of them, ever. I will never pretend that Hillary Clinton is anything even resembling a good person because you do not reach that level of power by having a conscience, but at the very least, she is not a rapist and paedophile that the general public knows of (which is more than we can say for her husband, btw). Trump has no moral high ground whatsoever, IMO. He has done everything imaginable, from scamming charities (this was proven in court) to raping minors (see Epstein). He has no redeemable human characteristics and is not even intelligent enough to pretend that he does, which is at least one thing that Hillary has going for her. I’m not going to sit here and list all the reasons why Trump is abhorrent because a) it cannot fit in a Tumblr post b) I would be sitting here for years. 

I will also not engage in discussion about whether or not BLM is a valid movement, ever. I don’t understand what you mean when you say it isn’t based on ‘facts’. Which, facts are in doubt, exactly? It’s based on multigenerational, still ongoing trauma and persecution of an entire race of people! I’m neither black nor an American, but I believe African-American people when they talk about the terror they experience on a daily basis in their own country. I have eyes and I have ears, I know plenty of white people and have insight into how they think because I too am white and have been raised with similar bullshit. I have lived in Africa for years and seen things with my own eyes. I will never not take the side of black people when they protest racism anywhere and I will never not believe them when they talk about police brutality, race-based violence and systemic racism in countries built on slavery. 

Of course, I’m not saying racism doesn’t exist in other places and in other forms, but talking about one does not negate the other. 

Also, I don’t understand the point you’re trying to make about the West not being sexist because other places have it worse? I’m sure I misunderstood this, so forgive me if that is the case. FGM is terrible, yes, but that in no way invalidates other types of gender violence that still ruins the lives of countless women. Just because the women in, say, Saudi Arabia have it worse, that doesn’t mean that the women here or in the USA should not talk about issues that directly affect them (and, btw, I have absolutely been outraged about Saudi Arabia and FGM and shared posts about both). All are bad! This is not a competition. 

On the topic of you saying that America gets so much shit for its history, which you think is unjust, I have to mention that European settlers killed up to 95% of Native Americans in some areas in relatively recent history. Just days ago, I was reading an article about how they killed so many people, it actually changed the global climate! This is genocide on such a massive scale, my brain can’t even comprehend it, and yet here we are today, with Columbus Day and Thanksgiving as holidays while the surviving Native Americans suffer all kinds of indignity and discrimination, so no, I don’t think we are talking about it enough and I feel that America deserves all the shit it gets for its history. IMO, it is not getting enough shit! The fact that there are other issues out there that need to be talked about too and are being silenced does not in any way take away from any of this. 

Anyway, let’s not argue about which country is The Worst™ and which human rights issues are more worthwhile than others because that is pointless. We already agree that all governments are corrupt, that evil happened and is still happening all over the world and that all human rights issues are important. I firmly believe that if they were to be evaluated by a psychiatrist, 99% of all high-ranking politicians would be diagnosed with serious clusters of antisocial personality disorders. Most of them would do anything and the only thing stopping them is whether or not they can get away with it. The remaining 1% cannot really do much and keep both their conscience and political power intact. 

In any case, the last thing I want in life is to get into Tumblr discourse with LJ people, so how about we just put this behind us? Let’s agree to disagree on who is worse, Trump or Hillary, because that is a pointless disagreement, especially since neither of us is an American and this is getting out of hand. I feel like we are actually miscommunicating and talking about different things. We seem to be arguing different points, so all of it is coming off worse for both of us than it really should be. Also, I wish you hadn’t sent me this ask anonymously, because I now have no way of responding to you except publically, and Tumblr is seriously not a good place for this. 

On a happier note, I’m very glad that you enjoyed DC! I’m very sorry for the extremely long hiatus! Unfortunately, I’ve been going through things that stopped me from writing for a long time. I hope that one day I can still come back and finish that story, in spite of everything! Have a good day/night! :)

*hugs*

[chronicbatfictioner]

Theater of the Soul - Chapter 10

It all sounded wrong. The red in the box. Yet it sounded right, too. He felt that he was moved, somewhere, out of his safety-- the blanket. His fort that is his safety. Somewhere else cramped and smelled like fruit and chemicals.

A hand was extended toward him, followed with dark blue eyes that felt... safe. Safer than none. He took the hand, but didn't lower his legs from the cushions until the little girl came in and spoke to him. The scenery outside changed rapidly, but the little girl chirped along with everybody else and assured him that he would be okay.

Everything else was a big blur until he found himself on a couch. A comfortable couch, unlike the ones he would find on the streets - obviously. But there were no stars in the sky - not that there ever was in the skies of Los Angeles. The air felt chilled, but stale-- bottled. And he mourned a little, for the freedom he must have lost again, this time; for his little bird, gone with whatever meager possession they must have taken away from him, again; for the boy and the little girl, still with him from the sounds of her voice nearby, just probably not for long.

He sighed, a little dejectedly as he watched the activity and people talking around him without understanding. It was odd, that his brain could not understand. He was good with languages. Once upon a time. Before hell rained down on him. Before the wrath of... whoever or whatever deity that hated him befell him. But it was all his fault, anyway.

What else is new?

It seemed that seeing Barbara's quite an emotional response, and Jason's likewise response to Barbara finally convinced Danny that they were all somewhat related.

"How do I know you're not a pedo, dude?" He demanded once they managed to get Jason in to Helena's car, along with some meager possessions that... well, that Helena deemed worthy to be put in her car; which do not 'smell or looked like it hasn't seen a detergent or soap in twenty years.'

Tim gave him a withering glare. "I'm fifteen. You're sixteen. I believe 'pedo' requires the monster to be an older person." he deadpanned.

"She's an older lady." he pointed out.

"And I can assure you, young man, that I have no interest in men whose age start with the number one, or are yet to be able to legally buy liquor." Helena retorted.

"She's actually a school teacher, you know." Tim said. "Maybe..."

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Drake." Helena warned.

"Not making any, just a suggestion." Tim shrugged, taking the front passenger seat and partially turned around to look at Jason. The latter was huddled in the backseat, hugging his knees and looked...

Tim blinked in confusion.

...scared. That's what Jason looked like.

On a whim, he extended his hand toward Jason. After staring at Tim's hand for a long moment, Jason tentatively took it and held on.

"You'll be okay," Tim told him. "Whatever happened, you'll be okay. I promise..."

"What did I say about promises you can't keep?" Helena scoffed.

"I don't care, Helena. He will be okay. Whatever and however." Tim said, solemnly promising himself that.

"Well... I'm going in to get my sis... Won't be five minutes. But if he freaked out..." Danny warned them as the car pulled over in front of the Hope Center.

"We'll holler." Helena assured him. As Danny slipped out of the car, Tim started to feel the tremble.

"Hey, hey... you're alright... Jason, you'll be okay, I promise..." Tim soothed him, rubbing his thumb to the back of Jason's hand - still lightly clutching his. "I know... I know you're scared. Whatever happened to you..." he continued, keeping his voice soothing and low. "it's not your fault, okay? I'm here to help. We're here to help you go home."

Tim kept talking softly, with Helena watching, until Danny came back with a 4-year old girl in tow. She glowered at Tim and Helena before her eyes landed on Jason and she bounded into the car. "Hi, Red!" she cooed.

Jason didn't reply. But he didn't object either when the little girl firmly took a seat on his lap. He had released Tim's hand to hold her with both arms.

"This is Ellie, my sis." Danny explained. "I told her we're going to a hotel with some really nice folks." he glared, as if expecting Helena or Tim to challenge him.

"Babs and Dinah would've gotten some food," Tim said. "...I hope." he added.

"Dinah has... handled homeless issues before." Helena replied, a little grim. "Just... food for thought here, Timothy, we're not in Gotham. Nobody here cares enough like Bruce Wayne to start something to help everybody."

Tim nodded. "I know." he acknowledged. "Just... I'm not stupid, okay? I'd love to help whenever I can. But I know where I'm standing."

"We don't really need your help, you know." Danny said, a little huffily. "I toldja my mom would be outta jail next week."

"And then you think she'll go back to prostitution, or can find a job on her own thereafter?" Tim asked softly. "It's just... Gotham, where I'm from, has this kind of problem, too. Back there, we have someone who's willing to help those who need it - like your mom or you. Here, honestly, I don't know if anybody will. And if what Helena said is right, nobody would. You'll need all the help you can get, Danny." he added.

Danny was quiet for a long moment, and then said, "I can get a job. I just haven't found any so far."

Tim nodded, but said nothing. "Yeah, we'll figure it out, man. Just... give us a week, alright?"

It was only once they got to the penthouse, and met Barbara's glare, that Tim started to wonder if his plans would backfire at some point.

"Bruce is flying here right after curtain down tonight," Barbara told him. "I've told him that Jason might need a physician, so he's bringing along Dr Leslie Thompkins. Whatever you have in mind for those two - and probably their mother, next, I hope you have or will think it through, Tim."

"Yeah, well. No I haven't. But I've checked with the Teachers' Registry and their mother is registered there. She was laid off from a private school due to downsizing - not because of any complaints. Babs..." Tim pressed his lips, "do you ever think of how hard of a decision it would be for a teacher to go down the road of solicitation to feed her children?"

Barbara's sigh was soft, but right there. "I am a woman, Tim." she reminded, and Tim could feel the flush rising up in his cheeks.

"Yeah, just... you know, even those of the same gender can sometimes be insensitive of their own's plight. ...Not saying you do, that is. Just..." he backtracked quickly.

"Timmy, baby, your compassion is stellar. But..."

"...if Bruce had thought of having 'saved' only one person, Dick wouldn't be there. Jason wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be here. And that's not putting names or numbers to the Narrows and Park Row kids at the community theater of each area." Tim snapped. "I don't understand people's obsession with numbers. Yeah, it might take me a shit load of cost to try and help one person. Yeah, I'm a kid, and maybe I don't have that kind of money. But at least I can present to those who can help - can set aside some of their resources to help. Like Bruce, maybe. Or Kate. Or anyone.

"Even if it doesn't work in the long run, Babs, at least I've tried. It's better than doing nothing, right? If everyone who 'wants' to help eventually do nothing, where do those who have less get their second chances? I know I'm not a god who can just will everyone to prosper or suffer less. I know I didn't waste my vote on the stupid idiot we have to refer to as 'the President' who'd made people suffer indirectly and directly. But at least I don't sit around and do nothing other than clucking my tongue and twiddle my thumbs!" Even as he wrapped up his speech, he quickly became aware of Helena and Dinah's glare from behind him. He screwed his eyes shut, feeling foolish.

He understood that his wishes were wishful thinking. Tim was smart enough to understand that it would take more than a few weeks at the Penthouse or a few jobs offered to make sure Danny, his sister, and mom wouldn't need to suffer and/or live on the streets. He just... didn't see why he shouldn't try.

"I've called my boyfriend, Ollie," Dinah suddenly said. "He told me that his friend, Michael Holt, has just opened a business here in LA that's looking for new employees. I'll see if he can save up a few slots." Dinah's boyfriend Ollie - Oliver Queen - was a businessman whose businesses tend to lean on the sustainable green businesses. Michael Holt, Tim knew from the plethora of articles of him in various magazines, has a technology-based company that has since blown up bigger than Apple and its contemporaries.

"They... and their mom - can stay over at our place while they look for another." Helena said. "No need for Wayne to keep this penthouse open while our place can handle them."

"We don't need charity!" Danny suddenly burst in .

"Danny..." Tim started, but Dinah cut him off.

"Oh no, buddy, this ain't charity. I'll bill you and your mom once she got out." Dinah told him. "You should consider this as being put on credit."

Danny seemed to contemplate the thought for one long moment, and Tim could feel Barbara tugging the back of his shirt, likely warning Tim to not interfere.

"Okay, fine. Just... just because you'll be taking Jason and..." Danny turned to look at Jason, all the way across the other side of the living room. "...maybe taking him home. I mean... he's pretty strong and all. But..." he gulped.

And Tim understood. Jason has been protecting the two kids for the past few months. In Danny's mind, Jason had probably done a better job than his mother.

"He has a home, too, Danny. And people who love him dearly." Barbara said softly. "He... had gotten hurt coming out here. It's our duty to get him back to health and take care of him. I'm... the Jason I know won't abandon you, and once he's back to health, I know he'll look for you again."

Danny's chin jutted defiantly, and Tim pretended not to see the swift dip or the tremble of his lower lip. "Yeah, I know. Besides, I figured if I keep in touch with y'all, I'll know where and how he is, eventually. Maybe you can help him find his beloved little Red bird."

Tim's vision suddenly tunneled onto Danny.

"--What??"

"Little Red Bird. He has this photo of a bird with red chest like, mid-flight. A polaroid photo. He had it for-- I dunno how long. Since I've met him, I think. I don't know where he'd found it or what it meant. I thought it was his pet or something." Danny explained. "He lost the photo a few days ago and... well... he's been like that since." he thumbed toward Jason. Still inert, not even responding to the little girl chatting and crooning. "Not like he was chatty from the start. But when he lost the pic, it's like he'd lost his will to live or something." he shrugged.

"Oh." Tim replied numbly. He caught Barbara's questioning glare. "I..." he gulped, torn between wanting to search through his archives in his laptop, and giving an explanation to Barbara. "It's... oh... I gotta show you." the former won, and he dashed to his bedroom, to his laptop. After what felt like forever (and after sending a print command to a printer), he finally found it.

He marched triumphantly with his laptop to Barbara, and pointed at the screen. "This," he said. "is a robin."

"Cheeky," Barbara smiled as the photo was printed out in A4-size letter - and a few others in smaller size because there is no photo paper available in the penthouse, and Tim wasn't planning on getting it - at least not now. "Robin, huh?"

"Yes, Puck." Tim said, smiling smugly. "He'd accompanied me on the shoots for this one. We were..." he gulped around the lump that suddenly appeared in his throat. "...I was making his portfolio. And then we saw the robins. This... mama robin was landing to feel her fledglings." he explained. "It was more of a lucky catch than anything... Jason loved it and asked for a copy in polaroid shape."

"Shit, boy, you took this photo?" Danny gave a low whistle.

"Language!" Helena hissed.

"Sorry, but,.. yeah, seriously. You printin' this out? He could be... I mean, maybe he'll be less sad..." he said.

"Yeah, I'm printing it out." Tim said, going to the printer and retrieved the bigger picture. "I'm not sure this will work, though... But..." he handed the picture to Danny.

"Oh no, buddy. If you're... if I'm right, then you should give him the photo." Danny said.

"Boys, I strongly advise we wait until Doc Leslie got here. If anything... if he lashed out or anything, the doc can sedate him." Dinah suggested. "That's... an amazing photo, Tim." she added, looking at the photo. "But yes, I think he has been in some sort of trauma-based catatonia, and thus the strong emotional ties to the photo. I would prefer to give him a little time..." she paused at Tim's glare. "Okay, I would like to observe him without uncommon stimuli for as long as possible, at least until Bruce gets here. Or at the oh-so-very-most until morning, since Bruce will get here by the crack of dawn and I expect most of us to be asleep." her tone of voice did not leave room for argument, and Tim shrank away a little. "Right now, I would like you - all of you - to wash up. Use the pool or something. Just wash up real good. And then we can get some lunch. Wait-- no, supper. It's almost 5 p.m."

"Can we get Thai?" Danny asked, almost innocently. Dinah glared at him. "I haven't had Thai in like, forever!"

Dinah huffed. "Fine. Just... all of you scrub up. Now!" she glared at Tim. "You too, Timothy. Or else I'm gonna throw you to the pool."

Tim almost laughed. Almost. Then his eyes landed on Jason, still huddled quietly at the corner of the couch in the living room with Ellie, Danny's sister, leaning on him comfortably.

"I'll get you home, Jason, I promise." he muttered under his breath, even if his mind is telling him that Jason's blank stare equals to a very tall, very sturdy brick wall around Jason's mind that might just be very, very hard to break through.

[hetaliafucker]

You're right and you should say it.

[Note] I don’t wanna mix Hetalia with real life history too much for obvious reasons, and my points in the following are not intended to be pro war or pro imperialism/empire/colonisation. They are just examples from history but are in no way me glorifying any of those things.

I also think that you're allowed to interpret or characterise fictional chracaters however you want. These are just my personal opionions and I am not actually hating on how other people write/draw him, this post is half serious, half satrical. So, take my sarcasm and tone with a pinch of salf. [End Note]

When people write him as a helpless crybaby I'm like. Have you. Have you seen. Have you seen Arthur. Have you seen. How tactical England has been in history and wars. Like. Yes the UK in reality is shit right now, but if this is a basically immortal being. Who has seen the rise and fall of 100s of British eras and civilisations/societies. Who is a Nation in general, and one of the oldest.

Arthur (Even if not always England) has been kicking about since the BCs. Arthur looked after himself as a child, learned how to survive, hunt, and fight on his own. As a child. He is one of the few nations old enough to remember Primal living. To remember the Middle Stone Ages and shit. Who knows how to survive.

He has either overseen or been involved in countless wars. He eventually became one of the largest Empires in history, if not the largest. He's a powerhouse.

Let's also not forget Pirate England.

The UK in real life is a shambles right now (Just England tbh. The other three are fine). It is  ludicrous. Laughable. I don't know if it ever will be fully powerful again (I say this as a Brit) but if there was an immortal being who represented our country in real life, and had been alive for millennias, I don't think they would be suddenly laughable, too. I think they'd be throttling the entire government right now, if they'd even been able to get in power with a Nation's oversight in the first place.

All I can imagine is him verbally shredding them to pieces. 'You're all fucking children. I have been alive since the Middle Stone Ages, do you truly think I haven't seen this sort of dissonance before? You are letting people- My people- Starve and freeze for your own futile greed. Amounts of money that will outlast every single one of you. Amounts of money you couldn't use up in a thousand life times, let alone one, yet you hoard it anyway. I have seen Kings more significant than you'll ever be fall from the same greed. The elders you let freeze are men and women who have fought beside me in wars and helped me build this country. The children you let go hungry and provide a poor excuse of education to keep dumb and working are the future of this land and I. And you dare to force them into poverty? You have the gall and audacity to think I would not rip your throat out for it? Your legislature is your own mortal creation. I do not follow your laws. I am above them, but I am not above resorting to how I used to resolve these things. So far, I have followed the standards of modern civilisation. I have tried to be patient. I have tried to be civil. The people voted for you, even if you fed them lies to do so, and I will always stand by my people as best I can. But now in power is a man who no one has voted for, and you refuse to hold another election that the nation is rightfully demanding and other people are paying the price of that toll with their lives. I am well past the point of being civil. You offer no respect so you get none back. This is your final warning- Fix it or I will have your head on a spear before sundown.'

Like. He'd be fucking terrifying. He values life because it keeps him alive (And I have always headcanoned that Nations have deep empathy for their people as they can actaully feel their pain) but he would be ruthless and unafraid to take it if necessary. Especially if its the lives of genuine, good, innocent people vs the lives of greedy and undeserving pricks.

Yet so much of this fandom and its history has written him as some sort of feeble twink who cries when America looks at him the wrong way. [Joke].

I do think interpretations and chracterisations of all the Nations can differ slightly depending on AUs too, and I love that because it's one of the few fandoms that has such diversity and creative freedom for these characters. A human high school or uni student Arthur Kirkland isn't going to be able to just. Murder someone the way Nation England would. Yet I think Cardverse Arthur Kirkland who has a duty of care to his people as the Queen Of Spades would do so if necassary and could have the same balance of merciful yet ruthless, but wouldn't have as much of a black and white 'None of this matters all mortals die eventually anyway' mindset. He would also have limits as he can die too, and actaully has to consider legislature and public opinion, unlike England. It's extemely interesting writing Arthur as he would be as a Nation and still having Primal instincts due to both nature and nuture, and how he would be a as human who has been raised in a civilised society and has never had to kill to survive (Depending on the AU). It's the same for all the characters.

Hetalia itself is obviously satire and doesn't touch on the deep side of these things, and being an anime, I can see why he's just been written and drawn as a cliche 'Hot uwu anime boy. Little meow meow. Everyone's favourite yaoi puppet'. And I get it, I've been there. I've been in this fandom for about ten years, and I got in when I was a pre teen/teenager. Believe me, I've been there. But one, I'm older now, and two, looking back, he (And all of them tbh) deserve so much more character analysis. Personified nations is such a fun and complex idea to work with, and I want to see so much more content touching on the deeper takes on these characters, even if the source material is more light hearted than that.

I would like to leave off with saying, I don't actually hate the way people write him. I love seeing how different people interpret different chracters, and I don't fucking own the rights to Hetalia so it's not like its my place to police people. If you write them deeply like me, great! I love that. If you like to use England as part of a ship and that's all you really use these chracters for, that's fine too. These were just my opinions and slight headcanons for him...And me and Ssuckit both get off on ranting to each other about character analysis so it's also me treating them with our shared (Give or take) hot takes.

The discourse around good ol’ Arthur Kirkland drives me up the wall because I could write fucking essays on that man and you want to reduce him to some one dimensional loser!?

[blessedarethebinarybreakers]

(1/2) Hello lately I have been confused and cowardly, Recently I was in a car with my parents and holding some money. A homeless man knocked on the window and even though I could've easily helped him, I didn't for I was afraid of judgement and i was greedy ( my parents and their friend were talking about how homeless people don't use the money in good ways anyway) I felt TERRIBLE as we drove away, and still do. Now I am again confused and cowardly regarding the incident in Charolettesville.(1/2)

(2/2) I’ve always had the philosophy not to fight hate with hate, but I believe you are right in one of your recent posts regarding the matter. I’m not very brave and I’m pretty weak, as seen with the homeless man, so this leads me to wonder how I can be brave enough to stand up for justice. How can I be brave and do what God wants by helping people. I am so afraid in this world, and I want to help but my fear gets in the way but things that are going on is too much not to help even in small way

Hello there, thanks for reaching out. You are asking some really important questions and you’re definitely not alone in having them or feeling confused or cowardly. I’m going to start by addressing your story about the homeless man and then move on to Charlottesville and how to stand up for justice.

I’ve had multiple encounters with people asking for money on the sidewalk or by walking up to my car, and some of them haunt me. There’s guilt to my memories of them, yes, but I try to focus not on that guilt but on how I can do better next time. The past is the past and we can’t change it, but we can do better in the future. 

I moved to Louisville last year from a suburb, and the people walking up to your car at a red light to ask for cash was something new to me. The first time it happened, I had nothing to give, and the rest of the day that person haunted me. I let them haunt me, because the memory inspired me to act – the next time I went driving, I put some ones and fives in my car so that I’d be ready for the next person.

The next person to knock on my window was a woman in early December, her breath coming out as fog in the cold. I gave her some money and wished her the best in the short time before the light turned green, and a few minutes after I’d driven away I thought crap. Her hands must be freezing, and I doubt she’ll use the little money she has to get gloves. I should have given her the gloves I was wearing. She and her frozen hands haunt me still, even now that it’s mid-August. And I am glad for the haunting – there’s the occasional twinge of guilt but I transform it into a resolve to be better.

The most recent person to ask me for some money was on the sidewalk of Charlotte, North Carolina. I was recovering from top surgery that week and had been praying for small opportunities to pay back how I’d been blessed – this could have been the perfect chance but I only had a credit card, no cash, on me. So that man haunts me too; and only just this morning I thought of how I should have, could have helped him, what I should have said: “Hello, I’m sorry I don’t have any cash on me, but my girlfriend and I are walking to a restaurant right now. If you like, you can either tell us what you’d want from their and we’ll bring it back to you here, or you can come with us and eat with us.”

So he haunts me and will continue to haunt me and again, I thank God for these ghosts in my memory, reminding me that I have so much to do to become a better follower of Jesus in the world. You had you past moment and it haunts you – how will you be ready for future moments? 

So that addresses the guilt about the moments you’ve missed the chance to help someone. But what about the question of whether you should give homeless people money at all? Because I’m sure it’s true that some of them spend the money in ways you wouldn’t want. I have several responses to that.

1) Give them something instead of money. I have some classmates who carry granola bars in their car so that when someone comes to their window, they can offer food instead of cash. I’ve heard of people who make care packages in ziplock bags with things like bandaids and toothbrushes and quarters that they hand out too.You can also do the whole “I’m about to go in X store / restaurant, is there something I can buy you” or if it’s cold, have gloves or a hat ready to give them. And I wish to God I could get over my anxiety and shyness and give them some conversation, because that’s a gift too and one a lot of people who sit/stand on the sidewalk all day sorely want.

2) Give them money and know it might not go towards what you want but hey, once it’s their money it’s out of your hands. And if it’s cold and they buy whiskey or some cigarettes, they may just be trying to survive the cold buy ingesting something warm. We are called to help how we can, not to judge. I suppose you might also talk to them, be like “I’m hoping you’ll use this cash to buy some food, but I understand it’s out of my control.” They may listen! 

3) Because yeah, the argument many people give that “all” or “most” people asking for money spend it on bad things, or that they got themselves into this mess through addiction so why help them …. are pretty loveless arguments. Statistically, a good number of “panhandlers” are supporting children or others. 

Now, it’s also important to keep yourself safe. Don’t stop your car and pull down your window on a dark / deserted street to talk to someone, or invite someone to eat with you if you’re alone and don’t think you could defend yourself against them if needed. Be loving, but be smart too. 

And it sounds like you still live with your parents – it may be hard sometimes to help folks when they’re around. I was the same way, when my parents and I would go into the city and there’d be people on the sidewalks asking for money – my parents always said something if I stopped to give them even just loose change. So often I wouldn’t, just to avoid those comments. It’s up to you whether you have the money to spare as well as whether you’re able to give it around your parents without harm to you. Giving a smile, acknowledging the person exists, is a good thing too. And you’ve got time to help, and other ways to help – such as volunteering at a food pantry or giving money to such a place, if you can. 

Now on to the next topic. 

To expand a little on my opposition to the “don’t fight hate with hate” comments many people make, my main frustration with such comments (or “there’s been violence on both sides!” etc.) is that they derail the conversation. We need to be focusing on how to help the side that, like, doesn’t have nazis and white supremacists on it, rather than policing their tactics.

It’s not that I’m a fan of hate or anything, but too often the frustration and fear of the oppressed is raised up to be “just as bad” as what the oppressors or doing – despite the fact that the oppressors have way more power to actually act on hatred, to be violent without consequence. In Charlottesville, for example, some counter-protestors maced nazis and pushed nazis around. Meanwhile, the nazis waved torches in people’s faces, also used mace and pushed people around, and got multiple people hospitalized, beat at least one Black man near to death, and killed a person. And yet there are people on Facebook who don’t talk about that, about the ideologies of the nazis that want everyone who’s not white to disappear from our country….they talk about how “both sides” had some violence and spread the platitude of fighting hate with love. It doesn’t help, it doesn’t do anything but make the oppressed feel unheard. 

And on to your desire to fight for justice but worry that fear will stop you. It’s okay to be scared. Seriously. It doesn’t make you a coward. So many of us are terrified right now for various reasons. Don’t be ashamed of your fear, but bring it to God and pray for courage to work through the fear. Brainstorm ways to work past the fear in advance, because in the heat of the moment the fear will probably win out if you don’t have a plan to combat it. 

If you’re a white person, it is our job to confront racism when we see or hear it among other white people. This is hard. It’s not fun. Especially when it’s racism from our parents or siblings or friends. If speaking out would put you in real danger -- such as if your parents would hurt you for doing so (emotional abuse counts) -- then it’s okay not to talk to them. Keep safe!! But when you have the emotional energy and it’s safe to do so, find ways to call people out. Comment on someone’s racist status on Facebook that no, their view is not okay. Or make your own posts sharing people of color’s tweets or articles about what’s going on -- even if it means a lot of people are going to comment obnoxious crap on them. Even if you don’t have the words or the answers when people try to argue with you, you saying something will show people of color and other marginalized groups who see your comment that there are people on their side.

Another great thing to do that’s more private is to message individuals. Reach out to any friends of color, Jewish folks, LGBTQ folks you know and let them know that if they need someone to vent to you’re there, or to know that you’re thinking of them and they’re not alone. This takes courage in its own way. Some of them may not respond at all, some may respond with a quick thanks or looking for real conversation. Whatever they answer, it will help at least some of them. We all need reminders that we’re not alone right now. 

If you are old enough to vote, vote! Not just in the big elections. And call or write your representatives; if you google for information on how to do so in your state you’ll find lots of resources, including scripts you can read from. 

It’s really important to be listening to people of color right now and raising their voices; to listen to Jewish people and raise their voices, to LGBTQ people and disabled people and so on and raise their voices. So listen, share. Educate yourself. You’ll hear ways to help. 

And when the fear keeps you from doing something you know you should do, it’s okay. Acknowledge the guilt you feel and bring it to God with prayers to transform it into future action. How can you learn from past mistakes to do better now? 

To close this long thing, I’ve got a prayer for you.

God of Justice,This person has glimpsed your call to support the oppressed and to lift them up, but they are enwrapped in so much fear. Be with them. Let them know their fear is human, that it’s okay. Ease their guilt, their anxiety, and transform them, God. Let them learn to focus not on human judgment and arguments but on the need to fight for justice. As they begin to make small steps towards that, may it get easier for them. Send your Spirit of courage to inspire and motivate them, and your Spirit of understanding and right judgment to help them realize that love is often loud. As they seek to do your will, may this prayer sing in their heart: Make me your instrument of justice, God. Make me your instrument of justice. Amen. 

If anyone has more to add to this, please do!

[survivor-junglerun]

FTC Q&A

So for all my questions please answer them by video I am sick and i don't have the energy to read everything, so billy: I want to ask why you abstained from the final immunity challenge? Chips: throwing your vote not to jake is meh to me but tell me a move you felt you orchestrated in more detail Julia: I love you i am glad you are in the f3 queen, please hex my cold on video i want to see that. That is all good luck final 3

Answers:

Billy:  I abstained because I had to do work, that requires me to be on my computer all day. I was more than willing to do the endurance, but I was not available to do the puzzle. It had nothing to do with the challenge itself, but no one discussed times for an endurance, and we were just given the puzzle and I simply did not have time.

Chips: 

Julia:

Julia - What did you change in your game after winning your way back in, that allowed you to be in the majority from the beginning of the merge? Also, why do you deserve to win over two people who were never voted out?

Chips - What was the most difficult moment in the game for you, and how did you bounce back from it?

Billy - Why do you deserve to win against two people who put in (from my perspective) EXPONENTIALLY more time into the game?

Answers:

Billy: I said in my plea speech that I didn’t do as much as the other two, but I stopped caring half way through because why would I give something my all when I saw the outcome. I wasn’t going to win the challenges. The majority was never going to work with me. I was walking towards being voted out because once people are set, they’re set. I tried to get people to vote out Julia, several times, no one wanted to. So I stopped trying. Everyone was so quick to want to stick together, that I wasn’t going to go out of my way, when I knew it would be just this if I made it to the end anyway. More people like other people, that’s how it is. So why try when I wouldnt have beaten the majority in any situation? Tell me you wouldn’t have done it this way as well, and I’m not sure if I’d believe you. So, I don’t think I deserve to win. But I think for all of the people who did the work, and weren’t rewarded, and didn’t get second chances, and gave this game their all, I want to win for them, for the people who actually wanted to play the game with me and make it fun, instead of be picked off one by one. A lot of the jury played great games, and they’re not in FTC, and I wouldn’t be in FTC without them.

Chips: The most difficult moment in the game for me was the blind round. I think that the combination of not knowing who had won immunity paired with the fact that it would not be revealed who had actually stuck to what they had said created a challenge. I had previously been in a final two alliance with Chrissa called Chris² and heard early on in the round that Chrissa was the target for the round. She had heard the same herself and was trying to deflect the vote to Brandan and I knew that would be a hard sell since he had already formed a group against her and it wasn't entirely obvious who it would be safe to target instead. I bounced back from the round and losing my final two by picking up the pieces that remained and trying to make sure that even though I knew that people had taken a "shot" at who I trusted that they felt they could trust me enough to keep me late in the game. I kept up a positive social relationship with them so that we could potentially work together as the game progressed.

Julia:

Questions: What was the most villainous thing you’ve done in this game?

Answers:

Billy:

Carson: the most villainous thing I did all season was sit there and tell Julia I was keeping her and voted her out, then voted for her again and was like “nah girl I got you” when the tie happened. It’s not much, but you don’t have to always be a villain to make it far. Some people rely on that, I didn’t have to (or really have to do anything)

Chips:

Julia:

Carson: The most villianous thing I did in the game was flipping sides to keep Billy in the game and voted out one of my allies (Brandan). I felt like this needed to be done #1 because people were already againts him, #2 he had already gotten a few people out himself and did so succesfully and #3 I didn't really know how well he stood with me in the game. So I promised him a vote, and didn't give it to him and he left unanimously. (SO SORRY I HAD TO DO THT)

Questions:

Chips: hello

Billy: I’m so thankful for this game because as much as we didn’t care too much we actually worked together and that’s cute because I really have grown to consider you a friend in these things. Had we gotten Chips out when I went home, what would your plan have been for the end game?

Julia: ugh queen. Why should Billy get my vote over you?

Answers:

Billy: my plan was to go to F3 with you and Drew, as I saw both of you deserving the win. We worked together from day one in this game, and I wanted you to take it to the end. I knew I was just a number for you, and I was ok with that, because I wouldn’t have flipped on you. It didn’t make sense to. Had Brandan not flipped sides, and you went home, I would have stuck with you and Drew to make it to final three.

Chips: Hi

Julia: hi dan! ummm i dont think he should bc he didn't do anything and like wouldnt submit challenges ect.. lol

Questions: Did not submit

Answers:

Billy:

Chips:

Julia:

Unfortunately due to unforeseen circumstances, i had to drop out early into the merge so i feel as though i don't truly know who has done what in this game. so, what would each of you say was your strongest asset, and strongest game move? (i had no interactions with billy, and i had more conversation with julia than i did chips despite only playing two rounds with her before i had to depart).

Answers:

Billy:

Gavin: my strongest asset was finding the people in the game who actually wanted me in the game and sticking to them. I wish we had gotten to talk, because it sucks you had to go. But I don’t think we crossed paths before then. But I would have liked to. I’m not going to pretend like my game is the strongest, because it isn’t. But I played my game, and that’s all it was. I hope everything outside the game is better though, real life comes first, and I think a lot of people in this community forget that.

Chips:

Gavin I think that my strongest asset in this game definitely was my ability to take and use information effectively. I found out who was getting votes and why and if I did not like that outcome I used that information to redirect the vote. This asset extended into knowledge of the powers that were distributed in the game as well in that I had formed a relationship with Madison that enabled me to know about her initial power and the one that you had gifted her when you left. -- My strongest visible game move was teaming up with Madison to disrupt the flow of the round where she played her Ruby Monkey idol. It was the most "visible" move I made during the game because it took the two people being targeted and flipped the vote onto someone unexpected (Noah). I think it was the strongest because it was a choice made by me to effect a vote and its outcome and following the move the rest of the votes fell as I wanted without me having to struggle with the "let's stick to this" mindset that had been previously in place. -- My strongest "non-visible" move was maintaining a strong relationship with Brandan and Julia the round that Dan was planning to vote me out by convincing Julia to throw her vote. They caught wind of the true plan and came to me with it telling me that they would NEVER vote me out, switching their votes to Dan in the process.

Julia:

Gavin: My strongest asset in the game was that I was able to talk to people from both sides at one point and I could be able to have SEVERAL options that I wanted to follow thru with. My biggest game move was probably finding out that Dan had lied to me about a vote that we were promised to go thru with. If I didn't have the connection I had with Brandan at the time, than I wouldn't have realized what was about to happen. So after compaing notes, I had succesfully voted out someone who had tried to do me dirty AGAIN the second time in a row. And from that point on, making it to the end was 1000x easier!

Questions: did not submit

Answers:

Billy:

Chips:

Julia:

Julia: why do you feel like you deserve to win when you literally wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for me and my idol plays? and you can’t claim “our relationship” or anything as the reason I kept you safe, it was literally just bc you’re a woman. what have you actually done? bc I don’t see much.

Chips: I’m voting for you dw bb you played an incredible game and no matter what happens you deserve it.

Billy. goat noises

Answers:

Julia: I mean I thought we had like a friendship bc I would have never voted you and never did vote you. Always stuck by your side ect. But weather you see it that way or not you keeping me safe guarenteed I would see another round regardless. Sooooo idk whatever LOL hexed

And as to what I did I was in the loop for alot of things. Such as when Dan got voted out tht wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for me going back to Brandan figuring out Dan lied again. Or the time tht I was able to stay in the majority, or maybe being hated by everyone sm yet still remaining in the f3? Idk take it as you please.

Chips:

Madison Omg! I love you so much.

Billy: In a goat accent Now I’m glaaaad I had it tieeeee and you lost as a resullltttt. I already acknowledged my being a goat in the game. Did you even read my opening? Probably not. 

[taco-calamitous]

Ha-HA! Have THIS long-ass shit on your page!