#anyway they're simple but striking. i love them

[shigure]

lately i've been wearing one silver ring from my dad and one silver ring from my grandma, one on each middle finger and honestly i love how it looks and feels. they're simple rings so they don't bother me to wear, and i've worn them enough that it feels wrong not to have them on anymore. and i look so much cooler with them honestly

[wileys-russo]

childhood sweethearts (14) II a.russo x reader

playlist one two three four five six seven eight nine ten eleven twelve thirteen

childhood sweethearts (14) II a.russo x reader

"you're early? sorry who are you and what have you done with the alessia russo?" you gasped in mock surprise as you opened your front door, the blonde almost forty four minutes early to be exact.

"i've been saying i'm a changed woman! time management is now very important to me." alessia grinned as you moved aside to let her in, cheeks warming at the soft kiss she placed against your lips as she shuffled past.

"do you have enough layers on michelin man?" you teased as she unwrapped herself from the cocoon of clothes covering her, hanging things up as she went. "well it's freezing out there! and you never dress appropriately so i always wear extra so i can make sure you're warm." alessia admitted as you melted, surprised you weren't a puddle on the floor.

"what would i do without you?" you tugged her down into a grateful kiss as her strong hands grabbed your waist. "freeze to death probably." the taller girl mumbled against your lips, pulling away with a smile.

"also can we really call it time management if you're almost an hour early? wouldn't time management mean you were on time?" you teased as she made a beeline for your sofa.

"time is just a concept anyway. i can send you a great ted talk on it!" the striker pointed with a promising look before sinking into your lounge with a content sigh. "what?" alessia frowned as you moved in front of her and placed the back of your hand against her forehead.

"just checking you're not deathly ill. ted talks? not taking six hours to get ready? you made it all the way to the lounge without tripping on the edge of my carpet? have you by chance had a recent alien encounter?" you questioned seriously as the taller girl rolled her eyes and swatted your hand away.

"i just missed you." she answered honestly and once again you melted. "i saw you not even two hours ago!" you laughed but there was a fierce adoration in your eyes as you gazed down at her. "yeah and it was a long two hours." alessia huffed, pout forming on her lips as you rolled your eyes playfully.

"go get ready please! our reservations at seven." her foot shot out to kick your bum as your eyes widened. "less! you told me you'd come pick me up at seven." you spoke in shock as the blonde shrugged.

"did i?" alessia hummed looking away contemplatively as you sighed with frustration. "nah just kidding, its at seven thirty." the blonde grinned as your eyes narrowed, shaking your head and hurrying

"sounds like you should really work on your time management babe!"

~

"you look lovely." you settled as strong arms wound round your waist and alessia's chin made itself at home on your shoulder. "so do you, beautiful as always." you smiled, twisting your head to meet her in a gentle kiss.

"you're so cute lessi." you beamed as her cheeks flushed slightly pink. "am not." she buried her face in your neck as you grinned, placing in your earrings as the strikes lips softly peppered kisses beneath your ear.

"ready to go?" the taller girl kissed your cheek one last time and stood up properly as you nodded, rolling up her sleeve and checking her watch which you'd never admit to her but was a simple action you found ridiculously attractive.

"alessia!" you laughed in shock as you stood and just as quickly were swept off your feet into a bear hug, legs wrapping around her waist as she hoisted you up and onto her hips squeezing tightly.

"well i told you i'd pick you up at seven didn't i?" the italian grinned wolfishly, clearly very proud of her joke.

~

"so whose there?" you asked with a slight frown as alessia parked up in front of the darts bar, playing with the rings on her finger as her hand dropped into your lap. "the arsenal girls and a few of the united girls, they're up here for an away game and beth invited them." alessia answered softly sensing your nerves.

"hey if it's too much we can leave, maybe go back to my place and watch a movie? makeout a little." she smiled charmingly, interlacing her fingers with yours and squeezing gently.

"no no i know you've been wanting to see ella, i'll be fine. promise!" you assured, pecking her lips as her hand shot out to grab the back of your neck. "for good luck." she mumbled against your lips causing you to laugh softly before pulling away.

"i'm holding you to the movie and the makeout afterwards though." you poked at her with a stern look as she nodded, kissing your lips a few more times before you broke apart and stepped out of the car, the blonde quick to drape her arm over your shoulders and pull you into her side.

"you've met most of the girls before anyway but this time you're a little more sober." alessia teased quietly as you both handed your ID's over to the bouncer who checked them and handed them back with a nod.

"don't remind me!" you blushed and playfully punched her shoulder, already spotting the girls in a private room toward the back of the bar. "well hello! about time you both got here." you both stumbled a little as a body crashed into you and wedged themselves in the middle.

"you especially mate! come on, lets grab a drink." leah waved off alessia's protests as her arm replaced the strikers over your shoulder, guiding you to the bar as you sent her an apologetic smile over the older blondes head, watching as alessia was swarmed by a small army of her teammates.

"i'm gonna miss those little terrors. please if they offer to run the program again, we're completely in." leah promised, handing you a gin and tonic as the two of you hung around chatting. "they adore you. and thank you for the tickets! i don't think i'll be able to get them to sit still on monday." you laughed, leah waving off the gesture.

"go on, i'll introduce you to all the girls. don't tell less but i think some of them are more excited to meet you than see her!" leah whispered making you laugh as she grabbed her drink.

"the poor girl never shuts up about you at training and we always know when she's textin you because she's got this big dopey star eyed grin as she stares at her phone." leah teased as you caught alessia's eye across the room, sending her a smile and a nod as she raised an eyebrow wordlessly checking in.

leah taking you around the room you were passed from hug to hug, having met most of the girls at least once but easily an hour flew by as you got the chance to properly speak with them, feeling much more at ease the longer you did so.

"well well well, i knew it." you turned around with an amused smile, ella letting out a deep and dramatic sigh. "knew what ella?" you laughed as the mancunian placed a hand on your shoulder.

"you're just head over heels in love with me! obsessed, can't stay away." the girl nodded before you both broke out into laughter as she pulled you into a hug. "less looks really happy, thank you." the girl murmured in your ear in a much more serious tone as your face warmed.

"thats probably because she doesn't have to put up with you everyday!" you quipped as she scoffed and hit you on the arm. "nah she probably tells me she misses me more than you!" the brunette stuck her tongue out before the two of you started to properly catch up.

"hi pretty girl." you relaxed as arms wound round your torso and the scent of her perfume engulfed you, a small kiss placed discreetly behind your ear. "mind if i steal her?" alessia asked leah and beth who waved her off, too busy arguing with ella over how the rules of darts worked.

you let the taller girl pull you away from the hustle and bustle of the group, tugging you around a corner and camping out near the bathrooms where it was a little quieter. "hi." alessia smiled softly, ducking down to press a few tender kisses against your lips.

"you already said that." you teased as she rolled her eyes. "and i'll say it again, hi." her body pressed a little more into you, your back meeting the wall as you were drowned in the sight, smell, touch and feel of her.

"it makes me really happy to see you with all of them, you're my family and so are they." your heart leapt and skipped a beat at the sincere confession, lost in the baby blue pools of her eyes as you. "you're such a little softie now." you grinned as she groaned and buried her face in your neck.

"stop saying that. i could beat you up when we were twelve and i'll do it again now!" she huffed, causing you to squeal at the ticklish sensation of her warm breath against your neck. "mm sure you would. i'd just tell your mum!" you teased.

"yeah and she'd take your side in a heart beat, you were always her favorite daughter anyway." the striker pulled away with a pout which you wasted no time kissing away. "and don't you forget it russo." you warned tapping her chest with your hand.

"i wanted to ask you something." the blondes demeanor shifted, hands moving from your hips to take a small step back and put a little more space in between the two of you. "i'm all ears." you promised, eyebrows furrowing just a little in curiousity.

"i wanted to ask if-"

she was interrupted by the banging of a door beside you as the bathroom swung open as a few of the girls stumbled out with a laugh. "less! marys been askin for ya." ella warned, booping your nose as she stumbled past with maya, clearly a little tipsy.

"what did you want to ask?" you questioned once they'd left, catching alessia's attention once more. "later, once we have a bit more privacy." alessia smiled but there was a flicker of something in her eyes you couldn't quite place as she grabbed your hand and lead you away.

your stomach clenched nervously as she pulled you over toward a girl almost as tall as less, whom you recognized well despite never having met her and you knew meant nearly just as much to alessia as ella did.

"finally! where have ya been hiding her hm?" mary beamed as she spotted alessia, grabbing her into a tight hug as the blonde laughed and mumbled something back.

"and you don't need any introduction, feel like i've known you for years with the way she rambles on and on over the phone about you!" mary grinned as alessia paled. "mary!" the strker hissed, cheeks tinted with embarrassment as the goalkeeper hugged you tightly.

"you look after her yeah?" the girl mumbled quietly as you swallowed but nodded, the beaming smile which met you as she let go easing some of your nerves, knowing she was just looking after alessia at the end of the day.

"oh leave her be! if anything less needs the shovel talk, i like your girlfriend more than you." leah sauntered over with a slight slur, both of your faces blushing a little pink at that word which neither of you had actually discussed.

"right! another rum and coke then captain?" mary sensed the slight awkwardness and swept the blonde away toward the bar. "sorry." alessia apologized as you cocked your head to the side curiously. "why? you've got no reason to be sorry." you assured, placing a quick kiss to her lips before ella yelled out challenging the two of you to a game of darts.

~

"i'm telling you, you take it! i'm hopeless at the whole hand eye coordination thing." you shook your head firmly, almost stabbing the striker as you tried to thrust the dart back in her hand.

"oi this isn't a fencing drill! careful." alessia laughed, ella impatiently groaning for one of you to hurry up. "look i'll help you." the girl chuckled, maneuvering you in front of the throwing line and pressing her front into your back.

"fingertips, close one eye." her hand gripped yours, adjusting the way your fingers held the dart and moving your arm up slightly, a soft laugh left your lips as she pulled one of your eyelids gently down with the pad of her pointer finger.

"look over the top of the dart and don't throw it hard, or else it'll just go too high. we want to aim for the eleven so we slightly adjust-" she moved your elbow a little more forward, the two of you so wrapped up in your little bubble everyone else seemed to fade away, missing the loving smiles sent your way by the other girls around you.

"-then you inhale, exhale. throw!" the dart left your fingers and wedged itself into the wall, missing the board entirely as ella doubled over clutching her stomach with laughter as you groaned.

"see! i told you." you huffed, spinning around in alessia's hold who made no attempt to hide her amusement as you smacked her shoulder. "yeah you're rubbish at this." the blonde agreed, lips curling into a grin as you scoffed, held in a bear hug against your will as you tried to break free.

"i told you to take all the throws!"

~

alessia took a seat in between lia and vic and sipped at her water, neither one of you really having had more than a couple of drinks, her because she was driving and you because you'd been so anxious about making a good impression.

she watched on with an amused smirk as you argued back and forth with ella about why your fear of geese was much more rational than her fear of bananas, everyone around you both teasing they were both ridiculous and her heart warmed to see her two worlds meshing together so well.

but as she scrolled absentmindedly through instagram, clicking into a few of the girls stories she'd been tagged in with a smile, all of it was wiped away entirely as she watched leahs close friends story.

she was up and on her feet in seconds, nearly crash tackling the shorter girl who looked up in surprise at the clear panic plastered on her friends face. "whats wrong?" leah asked as alessia tugged her off to the side.

"leah you need to delete this right now, you can see us kissing in the background!" alessia thrust her phone in her national captains face who blinked a few times in surprise.

watching the video she'd taken of beth and jen singing along terribly to the kelly clarkson song booming over the speakers where sure enough you and alessia could be seen sharing a brief but sweet kiss in the background over beths shoulder.

"delete it leah, now!" alessia urged as the blonde nodded, grabbing out her phone and tapping around, showing her once it was gone from her close friends story. "less i'm really sorry i didn't even realise-" but her words fell on deaf ears as the striker stormed off.

"you ready to go?" you looked up in surprise from your conversation, but seeing a newly hardened look in alessia's eyes your protests disappeared, nodding and standing up to your feet.

you hurried to say goodbye to as many of the girls as you could, alessia seemingly in a hurry as she walked off alone and you followed quickly after her with a frown. "less what's wrong?" you asked softly once you'd left the bar and headed for the parking lot.

"nothing i'm fine." the girl mumbled back, tucking her hands into her pockets as you reached for them and your stomach lurched, a million and one doubts creeping in about if you'd done something wrong.

"hey. you're clearly upset, whats happened?" you tugged on the back of her jumper, hands flying to cup her flushed cheeks as you frowned with concern. "nothing, i'm fine." she forced a tightly lipped smile and let herself into her car as you made your way to the other side.

"lessi." you tried again, reaching for her hand over the console and breathing a small smile of relief when she allowed it to fall on her knee, her own hands gripping her steering wheel tightly.

"hey, its only me. talk to me love, whats happened?" you spoke gently, squeezing her knee as she let out a deep exhale. "leah posted some video on her close friends story and you could see you and i kissing in the background." alessia finally explained, pushing your hand off and starting up the car.

"okay." you frowned and nodded along, trying to prompt her to elaborate further but only met with an awkward silence as the engine roared and she pulled away, flicking on the radio. you tried to make conversation but only receiving singular word replies or a fake smile you gave that up, instead watching london pass by in a blur out the window as you sped home.

when alessia pulled up outside your flat and made no move to undo her seatbelt you put two and two together that there was clearly more to it and you could piece together where you thought her mind was.

"can you come inside please? i think we need to talk." those words had alessia's stomach dropping but you didn't give her much of a chance to protest, letting yourself out of her car and hearing her follow.

neither of you said a word as you felt around for your keys, pulling them from your pocket and letting the two of you inside, the silence building as you both stripped off your outer layers.

"do you want a tea?" you asked softly, alessia nodding wordlessly clearly caught up in her own head as she took a seat and you left her to it, moving quickly around the kitchen.

returning you placed a mug down in front of her as the striker mumbled a quiet thank you, bringing it to her lips with a small sip as you both sat with your thoughts for a moment on the sofa.

"i was trying to ask you to be my girlfriend tonight." alessia broke first as you sent her a small smile. "i know." you'd known that had been her question long before the two of you were interrupted.

"which is why i think we need to have a talk." you placed your mug down on the coffee table and tucked your legs underneath you, not missing the flicker of fear in the blondes eyes as she met your gaze before looking down into her tea.

"clearly the thing with leahs story really freaked you out." you stated your observations and waited for a moment to see if she would elaborate but when the taller girl remained quiet you continued on with your point.

"i don't think you're ready for this yet less." you forced out the words which felt like razor blades against your tongue, the blondes head snapping up as her eyebrows furrowed and she opened her mouth to protest as you held up a hand and she hesitated.

"i really like you and you really like me lessi. thats not what i doubt at all and i don't think its your feelings that are the barrier, i know they're sincere." you assured softly as she nodded.

"but you're not out to the public yet less and i think that needs to be something taken into consideration with all of this alongside the conversation we already had about how the fame and the social media side of things works." you reached out for her hand, relieved when she allowed you to take it, even pulling you a little closer as her mug joined yours on the table.

"alessia i would never ever in a million years even dream of pressuring you about your sexuality or how you express that to yourself, your friends, your family, the world, anyone, until you are ready." you promised, squeezing her hand gently as her eyes remained locked with your own.

"but look at how much you just freaked out over leahs close friends story. you said it yourself you already have such minimal privacy and i'd hate for you to feel like we're constantly having to look over our shoulders and be hyper alert whenever we're out on a date or out with your family or i come to a game." you continued softly, dropping her hand and moving them to gently cup her face as she slumped into your touch, legs pressed against yours as you shuffled even closer.

"we might have started our lives in the same place but now we come from different worlds lessi. you go and stand in front of tens of thousands of people every week for your job, you rub elbows with celebrities and give speeches at swanky award ceremonies in expensive suits or gorgeous dresses and do ads for adidas or model for magazines. I sit in a classroom wipe runny noses, make pasta necklaces and coordinate parent teacher conferences!" you gave her a sad smile which she returned, her hands coming to rest on your hips as she easily lifted you to be sat on her thighs staring down at her.

"but i don't care about that, i've never cared about that. i love what you do and how you teach and how passionate you are, and i'm so so proud of you." alessia whispered out, voice dangerously close to breaking which tugged at your heart and her grip tightened.

"i know, and i will forever and always be proud of you. like i said less you and i and how we feel about one another aren't the problem. you told me yourself how much your mental health suffered when everything became so toxic on social media with the transfer from united." you started, thumbs gently tracing her jawline.

"if someone posted a video of us kissing or holding hands or anything and the rumour mill started up about your sexuality and our relationship i would hate myself to see you get hurt like that again." you whispered out, unable to bare the thought of how heavy that would weigh on her.

"and we both know i don't really care for social media but if fans ever did some digging and found out which school i work at i could lose my job less." you reminded softly as alessia nodded with a pained wince.

"its a ridiculous concept that anyone needs to ever 'come out' but that journey and that decision it needs to be in your hands less, not at the fingertips of teenagers with no sense of boundaries and an iPhone." you promised firmly, eyebrows furrowing.

"but i love you." alessia breathed out, voice cracking as you smiled painfully. "and i love you. i've loved you since we were kids and i don't think despite how much time has passed i'll ever stop." you promised quietly.

"then why does this all feel like a goodbye?" alessia forced out and your heart broke at the tears which welled up in her eyes as her fingertips dug into your hips as if afraid you might disappear in the blink of an eye.

"its not a goodbye less, you'll always have me around. but you’d go and get glammed up at award shows and then come home to me in joggers on the sofa. you have an entire room of awards, trophies, medals, i have a few crayon pictures taped to my fridge. you are easily one of the most sincere, sweet, loving, caring, passionate human beings i've ever met and you deserve someone who can share the spotlight with you, not slink about and cower around the edges." you sighed, jolting a little in surprise as alessia moved you off her lap and stood.

"so what you're just, you're giving up on me, on this, on us?" the striker struggled to get out her words, face twisted and cheeks blotchy as her fists clenched. "no less i'm not-" you stood and tried to reach for her but she stepped away.

"i love you, you love me, we have been through so much together and worked so hard to fix things. why isn't that enough?" alessia frowned, chest heaving and head spinning as she struggled not to cry.

"you’re a stargirl alessia you always have been, so you deserve someone to shine bright with who doesn't need to be hidden or mean you feel pushed to do something you're not ready for yet! its because i love you that i just don’t think that someone you deserve is me." you confessed, trying to push down your own insecurities.

"no. no! i don't accept that. you're just tired and not thinking right and i'm tired and i just-i'm going to go home, we're going to sleep it off tonight and i'm going to see you at the game sunday afternoon and we can talk after that." alessia shook her head firmly, and before you could even say a word her lips were pressed against your cheek and the front door was closing after her.

~

only, that wasn't how it worked.

"lessi! darling you played brilliantly." carol beamed pulling her daughter into a firm hug, but the strikers eyes roamed the family and friends section, ignoring the praises and the hugs from her family only looking for one person.

"she's not here?" her eyes met her brothers who frowned as he pulled away from her. "i tried calling but she didn't pick up, i'm sorry less." gio apologised softly as alessia's face fell.

"its fine, thanks for trying." the girl sighed with a small smile, swept away by her parents and trying to force on a brave face as plans were discussed for their usual dinner.

"uh no, she's busy marking." alessia lied as you were brought up, mario questioning how many to make a reservation for, grateful for the fact no further questions followed as she excused herself to go and grab her things.

"hey, come with me for a second?" leah had picked up from across the stands the miserable look on the younger girls face and had been waiting for her in the tunnel, ignoring alessia's attempts to dismiss her and pulling her into one of the medic rooms for some privacy.

"is this about the other night? your head hasn't been in it all day. less i'm so sorry about the story i really should have looked but i was drinking and just clicked post and-" leah started to apologise as alessia shook her head firmly.

"leah i overreacted the other night and i'm really sorry, i know it wasn't on purpose and its not about that, well it sort of is but not completely and-" she struggled to get her words out, leah encouraging her to engage in a few deep breaths.

once she had calmed a little more the rest came out like word vomit, leah following along with a slight frown as the striker got everything off her chest about her-conversation? argument? disgareement? she wasn't even sure what to call it.

"okay. so now its been a couple of days, what do you think about everything she said?" leah asked gently, pulling herself to sit up on the med bench next to alessia who sighed.

"i don't know! i don't want to completely dismiss her feelings but to be blunt she's being stupid. if anything i don't deserve her and i don't care if our lines of work are rapidly different, if anything thats why i love her so much and i feel like we work so well together." alessia admitted honestly as leah hummed to show she was listening.

"but she has a point about the whole social media and boundaries thing. i'm not ready to come out but i shouldn't have to be in order to engage in a meaningful relationship? why does society get to ruin that for me just because people don't understand privacy." alessia huffed, kicking her feet out with a scowl.

"but then on the other hand i'd love nothing more than to be able to show her off because well...you met her and you know how wonderful she is. but people would just find every little reason to tear her down and i'm not able to protect her from everything, especially not faceless internet trolls." alessia groaned, leaning back on her forearms and looking up at the roof.

"but then why should any of that stop us from being together? i'd never want her to feel hidden or like a dirty little secret but there are ways we could go about maintaining our privacy. plus i guess her not being famous eliminates people being able to cyber stalk her, she hardly even uses social media." alessia frowned, a slight curl of leahs lips all that showed the amusement that came from watching alessia work herself through this.

"so then go tell her all of that lessi." leah bumped her shoulder into her teammates with a nod of encouragement. "okay. okay yeah i will!" alessias eyebrows knotted together and she jumped down to her feet.

"less!" the blonde paused, hand on door as leah called out, holding up her car keys which had slipped from her pocket.

"might need these romeo."

~

without really giving a believable excuse why but grateful no one pressed her about it alessia had cancelled dinner with her family and raced from the emirates right to your place.

but circling the block twice and unable to find a park she cursed to herself and retreated to her own flat, and then of course right as she stared to walk it started to rain.

when you heard knocks at your door that evening you assumed it was the pizza you were eagerly waiting for and leapt to your feet, eyes widening in shock to find a soaking wet alessia russo holding a boquet of soggy flowers on your doorstep instead.

"less?? jesus christ you're drenched! did you walk here?" you pulled her inside and closed the door, the rain thundering down against your roof.

"are you stupid? do you want to get sick? go get in the shower!" you ordered sternly, dismissing your shock at her sudden arrival for concern about her wellbeing. "alessia! go." you tried to push her when she remained unmoving, grunting as you had no success.

"no. we need to talk!" alessia shook her head stubbornly. "so you walked here in the pouring rain? why didn't you just call me?” you sighed as the blonde paused, cheeks flushing red at the realization.

"because i need to say this now!" she recovered and you accepted the flowers held out toward you. "sorry, they got a little wet." alessia mumbled as you couldn't help but smile at the gesture, moving to put them down in the kitchen.

"can you please go take a warm shower and i'll get you some dry clothes? then we can talk." you tried but again were met with a shake of her head, a small puddle forming beneath her on your floorboards.

"sit down please." her hands fell to your shoulders, walking you backwards until you reached the bar stools, giving in with a sigh and taking a seat.

"you had your time to speak on friday, and i've had my time to think things over about what you said." alessia started as you nodded, crossing one leg over the other and trying to ignore the urge to strip her wet clothes off of her and push her into the shower, already seeing a slight shake in her body.

"as much as i respect you, and i respect your thoughts and your feelings i still disagree. i meant it when i said i love you, i'm so in love with you and i have been for years. we've only just worked through everything that ruined what we had last time and i will never stop being sorry for my actions even with your forgiveness and i need you to know that." alessia pushed as your face softened.

"i know less, i know." you assured softly as she sighed a little in relief.

"good. that being said, i can completely understand that you want to protect me as much as i want to protect you. i know coming out needs to be my choice and a journey guided by my hands but why should me not being ready to go public stop me from enjoying a relationship where i feel so loved and safe and comfortable." alessia started, shifting nervously from one foot to the other.

"everyone who means something to me already knows, everyone in my support net and my circle knows and they still love and accept me regardless. i don't need the validation of coming out to a bunch of strangers but if it means i lose you then i'd do it in a heartbeat, there isn't anything i wouldn't do for you." alessia promised as you sighed quietly.

"less-" "please let me finish."

with a nod and a quiet apology you fell silent again as she took a deep breath.

"you said i deserve someone to shine bright with, to share my life with and not slink around the edges of it. but there isn't a single aspect of my life i can't see you fitting perfectly into or making feel even brighter! i don't care if i come home after some big ridiculous award show to you on the sofa in sweats marking spelling homework, in fact i can't think of anything else i'd rather come home to." alessia let out a small laugh as you cracked a smile.

"i know we come from different worlds, i can't fault that. but i'd love nothing more than for them to come together, i know you would always be there for me through all the highs and the lows, and you won't ever completely get it, but thats the beauty of it. i love you because you're you, not because of your job or your salary or the fact you can't kick a ball to save your life!" alessia threw her hands up in the air.

"hey!"

"everything that you think is a barrier or a difference or further proof of how wildly opposite our lives and careers are only makes me love you more. i'm not saying we won't have challenges and arguments or disagreements, but nothing thats worth fighting for is easy. and you are the number one person i'd go to war for." she closed the gap between the two of you, her wet hands clasping your cheeks as your own settled on top of them.

"now last time i gave you this speech you were very angry with me but i found it in my phone notes and i'd really like to say it again if you can get through it all without you kissing me to shut me up?" alessia joked softly as you nodded.

"i know that you still cut the crusts off your toast and you refuse under any circumstances to eat olives or tomatoes. i know this because i'd always make sure i'd take them off your plate for you before my mum would notice." alessia started as your lips curled into a smile.

"i know that you bite your nails when you're nervous or feeling shy, and you fidget with your necklace when you're worried someones speaking about you. you'd twist my rings around to distract me when you knew i was nervous before a game and i'd never even need to tell you because you just knew when i wasn't myself. i've loved you since you were that god awfully shy short unathletic six year old who had scuffed shoes two sizes too big and the boys shirt on because your mum accidentally sent you in your brothers hand me downs." alessia continued on.

"i know that you still use chopsticks or a spoon to eat certain kinds of crisps because you hate the feeling of the dust on your fingers. i know that you hate most hot drinks because they remind you of the time you burnt your tongue on two minute noodles. i know that you couldn't care less about football but you'd listen to me bang on about it for hours because you didn't want to hurt my feelings or have me think you didn't support me. you'd let me kick balls at your head for hours because you knew it helped me, you were the first person i'd go to after a game and the only one i'd point to when i scored!" alessia's smile grew as you shook your head lightly.

"the airplane arms have always been around." you teased gently as you reached up to gently move a wet strand of hair out of her face.

"every time that I am around you my entire being, every single cell and fiber and mollecule feels fizzy. you make me feel properly alive, full of hope and laughter and the purest kind of joy. i know that you could run intellectual rings around anybody but you choose not to because you're a very good person, the best kind of person actually. you're kind and you're selfless and you've always put other peoples needs before your own. which is exactly why you've always pushed me more than anyone else i've ever met, and that you've always believed in me, maybe even far more than i ever believed in myself. i do know you. because its you, its always been you, and i think it will only ever be you." alessias voice shook a little as she took a moment to compose herself.

"so for the love of god will you please be my girlfriend?" alessia held her breath the moment the words left her mouth, biting down nervously on her bottom lip unable to read your face.

unable to find the words the blonde was a little taken aback as you stood to your feet and surged forwards, pressing your lips against hers as your arms wound around her neck.

you poured every single little ounce of love into that kiss, and alessia felt it.

"so thats a yes?" the girl pulled away, pupils dilated and slightly out of breath as she pressed her forehead against yours. "yeah, thats a yes." you laughed, eyes welling up with tears at the overwhelming surge of emotions which flooded your body.

unable to stop the shit eating grin which devoured her face you laughed louder as alessia's hands hooked under your thighs and hoisted you up and into her arms, your legs wrapped around her waist as your mouths moved in perfect sync with one another.

"baby this is very romantic. but you are still soaking wet and your teeth are chattering, can we please go have a warm shower now?"

~

"okay! okay! 4D i need you to settle down please, listening ears on." you clapped out a pattern, half the class clapping back and the others still chattering away as they did every monday morning you'd try to settle them.

but with a gentle knock on the door they fell silent, eyes wide and soft whispers bouncing around the room at their visitor who looked to you with an apologetic smile.

warning your class about your superhuman hearing you stepped out of the room, rolling your eyes with a chuckle at the way the chatter exploded up again as you did though this time about the kitted out arsenal player who'd been standing sheepishly in the doorway.

"you forgot your lunch." alessia handed you the bag of food as you shook your head with a smile. "thank you baby." with a quick glance around you craned up to peck her lips appreciatively.

"now go! if you're late again kelly will have my head." you teased, the blonde grinning and pecking your lips one last time and stepping away. "i'll see you tonight pretty girl." she promised, blowing you a kiss and turning around.

"you know your bum looks great in those shorts 23." you teased quietly sending her a wink. "excuse me missy we're in a teaching environment. be professional!" the striker warned now walking backwards and wagging her finger at you, ring glinting as it hit the sun.

"but i know it does." she winked cockily with a smirk. “thirty years old and we’re still bringing the heat!” the footballer did a little shimmy as your eyes widened. "less watch out for-" your warning was far too late as she backed up into the rubbish bins, slipping over and tumbling to the floor with a loud bang as you winced.

"sorry! no need to worry we're all good here." you dismissed the heads which popped out of other classrooms, alessia hurrying to her feet and sending you one last apologetic smile before high tailing it out of the building.

with a sigh and a chuckle you returned to the classroom, the chatter falling silent as you raised an eyebrow.

"lets try this again then. good morning 4D!" you sung out with a smile.

"good morning mrs russo!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

aaaand that brings this delightful little series of mine to a close. thank you for reading my friends 🤎

[stxneflxwers]

duckies.

⋯⁂ summary. you seem to have found a kindred soul over loving rubber ducks.

⋯⁂ a/n. short and sweet, barely edited, etc. just rubber duckie bonding time! i have a very small collection of my own, so this felt partially warranted to write hehe.

⋯⁂ characters. dr ratio. gn reader.

⋯⁂ cw. fluff...? yeah sure whatever it's just fluff. ratio is a cw of his own. reader works at the intellgentsia guild.

dr. ratio.

💫 he visited your office once – once – only to find you nowhere in the room, but also spotting a rather fashionable-looking yellow rubber duck on your desk... it's dressed in a black and white tuxedo with a little bowtie and top hat.

💫 and, needless to say, he didn't stop himself from picking up the duck and observing it up close. he presses it between two fingers, forcing an airy squeak from it. his eyes narrow further into dangerous slits while he hums in contemplation – he was entirely unaware of your shared adoration for rubber ducks.

💫 although, he can't say he's one for various designs – the simple, classic yellow one is enough to satisfy him. but now he finds himself rethinking that. maybe he could get more... but where would he even purchase ones with such blatantly silly designs?

💫 and then you scare the living hell out of him by entering the room – he gasps and visibly jumps in surprise, the duck tossed between his hands before getting safely caught between both his large hands.

"...hi, veritas." you snicker, "do you like my duck?"

"you–" he sputters, slamming the rubber duck back down on your desk and quickly crossing his arms, but the blush that permeates on his cheeks is undeniable. "i was merely observing."

"a rubber duck? you didn't strike me as the type to have interest in rubber ducks." you grin. "but, anyway, i'm not here to shame you over our adoration for the cute little duckies!" he glares at you, "i have more at home! they're fun to collect."

"...you collect them." he says, sounding more like a statement than an inquiry.

"yup." you nod firmly, "should i...maybe commission one that looks just like you~? mind if i take a picture–" you howl with laughter when he storms out of your office with the reddest blush you've ever seen on his face – if you didn't know better, you would've asked if he has a fever.

how adorable.

and now you're sure you can find a staff identification picture to use to your advantage...

[octuscle]

Bowling Night

"Bowling? Really?" Francis was fuming with rage. His friend was finally back home after two weeks away on business. He had dressed up. He had been looking forward to a romantic evening. And now his friend was taking him to a shabby bowling center full of fat rednecks. "Darling, please! I had five-course dinners every night for two weeks, had to make small talk in a suit every night. I was looking forward to seeing you so much. But I want to do something really simple tonight. I don't know how I came across bowling myself, but I passed this place on my way from the airport. And somehow I really felt like it now." Konstantin took his friend tenderly in his arms and gave him a kiss on the forehead. Francis tapped his pink sneakers on the floor. Konstantin knew his friend only too well. He knew he couldn't stay angry for long. He gently pulled Francis out of the parking lot and towards the bowling center. Maybe it was going to be a nice and relaxed evening after all. He had always loved going bowling as a child. He had loved celebrating his childhood birthday at the bowling alley. But it must have been…. "YUCK!" Francis cried out. "I'm not wearing those shoes in my life. They're disgusting. What brand is that anyway?" The young man at the counter rolled his eyes. Konstantin tried to calm everything down. Francis struggled to calm down. Konstantin had promised him a glass of sparkling wine. He could usually always calm Francis down with that. And it seemed to be working now too. Konstantin took Francis in his arms and they walked to their train together. Francis continued to grumble quietly to himself. "And when is my champagne coming now?" he asked. "Yo, two brewskis for two browskis?" Francis looked at the young man like an insect to be squashed

"I've already got a beer, you can have that. I'll get a second one for you, buddy." The young man pressed an ice-cold bottle into Francis' hand. He smelled of sweat and Axe. Francis almost had to hold his nose. But then he looked the waiter in the eye. Beautiful blue eyes. Damn, what a face. Features as if chiseled from granite. And even though he didn't know what was coming over him, he gave the waiter a fist bump and said, "Thanks buddy, you're such a lifesaver!" And to Konstantin he said "Come on then, let's throw some bowling balls." Shit, for supposedly still bowling, he was good. Damn good, Konstantin thought to himself. And how did Francis know the waitress? The two of them seemed so familiar, as if they'd known each other since kindergarten? A burp from Francis snapped Konstantin out of his thoughts. "Bro, like seriously? Wake up, it's totally your go!" Konstantin's eyes were almost watering from the stench of nachos, beer and cigarettes that Francis had belched out. They didn't have any nachos. And Francis didn't smoke. "Yo, Chuck! We're all thirsting for another round of brewskis, and hey, you got any cancer sticks on deck?" Francis called out to the waiter. The legs of his sweatpants were tucked into white socks that were no longer quite clean. And what had he done to his hair? Konstantin threw his ball. Strike! He turned around. And saw Francis openly grabbing the crotch of the waiter, who had just returned with beer and cigarettes, and sticking his tongue down his throat. Francis registered Konstantin's horrified look with a grin. "Yo fam, Chuck is gonna roll up later on. I'm thinking a triple threat situation would be straight fire to cap off this lit night, amirite?" Francis stood up, took Konstantin's head and pulled him towards him. And then he gave Konstantin a deep, long French kiss. Konstantin felt dizzy. Francis stank. No, he smelled male. Very masculine. And he tasted masculine. And he felt masculine. Konstantin wanted to run Francis through his curls. But there were no more curls. There was only cropped hair. Francis pressed his crotch against Konstantin's. Both their cocks were hard as steel. "We gonna have that lit threesome later, but right now, I need you, like ASAP, like yesterday! Hurry up, babe!" Francis whispered in Konstantin's ear. And pulled him towards the toilet.

Always when Stan rolled back from a away gig, Frank went total cray-cray like a hyped-up rabbit. Those two went at it like wild animals in the john. Chuck totally saw that coming, no more bowling for them today, duh. When Frank and Stan finally strolled back, Chuck was there waiting with three brewskis like a boss. "Yo, chill out outside while I dim the lights. Hope you've got some juice left for me!" Stan and Frank just grinned and nodded. They sauntered out to the lot, Stan sparking up a ciggie. The night was just getting started, y'all! 🍻💥✨

[aragaki]

Darlin/Pack Members

Because my self-control is zero and I just think Darlin' is the most interesting listener character who also deserves the entire world and William Solaire's wallet.

Milo

Already wrote some about them here but they're my non-canon otp so ofc I wanna talk about them more

The pack's most photogenic couple. Milo puts in the effort to look good and dress well but Darlin' is just the most effortlessly good-looking. They can roll out of bed in yesterday's clothes and unbrushed hair and any candid shot looks like it belongs on an influencer's curated social media. It drives poor Milo crazy.

Before they moved in together, Milo would send messages to Darlin' throughout the day to let them know what he was up to and where he was going. They never asked but he knows it makes them more comfortable and he's always happy to do it.

Christian can't make his jokes about Milo's wolf size for nearly as long when he's mates with Darlin'. Darlin' isn't a brute, they're a protector, so of course they notice the way Milo's smile tightens when Christian piggybacks onto Ash's jokes. They give him three chances to knock it off and after he doesn't listen to them on strike three, they start swinging. Darlin' doesn't ask Milo to talk to David about how he's feeling but he has to anyway when David interrogates him about what caused Darlin' to break Christian's nose.

Darlin' has always been Marie's favorite and she has no problem saying as much. She's wanted them as her kid for as long as she's known them, little spitfire that they are, and is beyond happy when Milo finally makes it official.

This also means that Marie is Darlin's primary healer and gives them twice the ration of shit that she gives anyone else - including Milo! She loves them so much but will not hesitate to kick their ass for being reckless.

Milo is without a doubt Darlin's lifeline during pack meetings. It's a lot, being home and surrounded by people you thought would be fine without you - who are upset with you for thinking so - and Milo knows all the best places to escape with them. They never admit to needing a breather but he always knows.

Milo and Darlin train together!! They absolutely do!! Darlin' knows they can rock Milo's shit and he does too, and he loves it. When they spar or box together it's always going to end in a makeout session. He can't help it, they look so damn fine all fired up and sweaty. They've absolutely gotten caught but no amount of teasing will get them to stop.

Darlin' doesn't mind dressing up for Milo. It's not their thing usually, simple and maneuverable works best for them but every now and again they can be persuaded with plenty of kisses. Fancy restaurants make them feel out of place but Milo always seems so happy to see them under the light of glittery chandeliers and that makes them happy too.

One time he did manage to piss off Darlin' during a fancy dinner so they pretended to propose to him in front of the entire restaurant and it nearly gave him a heart attack. The cake and champagne they were given more than made up for it though.

When Darlin' sits down, Milo has the habit of coming up behind them and massaging their shoulders and neck. He has a hard time keeping his hands off of them at the best of times but he wants to help get rid of some of their stress so small random massages are his way of helping with that.

Darlin' likes things that are simple and physical, they're a tactile person so they've absolutely got a photo album of them and Milo. Marie even gave them some old pictures of them together from their teens for it. Milo finds it one day by accident and if it had him crying on their bedroom floor for 15 minutes that's between him and Aggro.

Speaking of Aggro, he has a love-hate relationship with Darlin'. They're convinced the cat hates them, the way he swats at them and hisses. They say Milo is Aggro's person and he's jealous that Darlin' takes up so much of his attention. But every night, he tries to climb up and sleep on Darlin's chest, head resting under their chin. And if Milo tries to move him to cuddle with Darlin' he gets a full-force bapping to the face until he gives up and lets Aggro do what he wants.

Darlin' has absolutely shifted and laid down so Aggro could climb up onto their back and nap there. They'll never tell a soul.

I talked about it in my other Milo post but Milo kissing Darlin's scars!! They've been through so much and it's affected their self-image so much. Milo can't stand that. So he kisses each and every one, even the ones that make Darlin' lip curl in disgust at themselves, and say something about them that he loves. Physical, emotional, about their personality. Anything. This praise king could go on forever. And he means it and that's what makes Darlin's heart ache the most.

And when they start to believe it, Milo couldn't be more proud. The crease between their brows when they see themselves smoothes out. They don't sneer at the bite marks that are dotted around their skin nearly as much. They get confidence in how they look, and in how desirable Milo finds them. He can't wait until it turns into true self-love.

Milo has no problem being the in-between for Darlin' and David. Both have strong personalities. Both can word things that, while meant to be loving, can be harsh and wound the one who hears them. Milo doesn't have a lot of patience, but he is fluent in Grumpy Wolf at this point. His interventions have honestly brought the unintentional hostility between them down and made it easier for them to talk about their thoughts, feelings, and opinions on their own.

When they're shifted, they're almost always stuck together. Doesn't matter if it's a hunt, a run during the Solstice, anything. They will not be separated. They're both ready to throw themselves headfirst into whatever danger might happen to protect the other, much to the exhaustion of the rest of the pack who really wish they would just stop throwing themselves into danger.

Asher

"Well mark me down as scared AND horny!" Has been Ash's response to basically everything Darlin' has done since they were teens.

Seriously, there would be no denying that Darlin' intimidated Asher when they joined the pack. A new wolf from outside of Dahlia joins the pack with a chip on their shoulder a mile wide and so fearless they'll jump in first into any problem??? They're intimidating but also!! They aren't mean to him!!

He was without a doubt one of the members of the pack who tried to help Darlin' integrate the most. He'd include them in anything he could, even if it made his other friends side-eye him. He was shameless about it too!! If they wouldn't spend time with him, he'd be following them around like a lost puppy. It was like they had a second shadow.

Some members of the pack scoff and roll their eyes at Asher but not Darlin'. Even if they don't seem interested in his rambling they're always paying attention. They've always listened. And he didn't realize how important that was to him until it was gone.

Becoming pack beta and David's second in command was a huge shift and he's well aware that plenty of people don't think he's up for it. But Darlin' was never one of them. They had their own quiet belief in Ash and what he could do, never questioned his fit for the role. Even as they withdrew from the pack they knew that David could handle it if he had Asher's support.

After Darlin' fell into the wrong crowd, Ash was the most vocal about getting them back and bringing them home. No argument mattered to him, Darlin' was a member of the pack and they needed to be there. He wasn't above saying it was just because he missed them. That didn't change when they stopped being teenagers. He still feels like a dumb kid with a huge crush who missed his chance.

Then, all at once, it all falls apart. Darlin's unempowered friend is almost killed, by Darln's own mate, and the Shaw pack is rallying behind them to try and push the department to act. Then it goes quiet. They leave, saying they're heading up to be with their family and Ash feels like someone hollowed out his chest. It's how he imagined it feels like when someone's mate dies - a constant ache in his chest. Which he knows he shouldn't feel because regardless of his feelings Darlin' isn't his mate. Hell, they just had to leave theirs because he was a shitty person!!

He's confused and it only gets worse when he finds out Darlin' had been lying to them. That Quinn was still at large, that they put the pack at risk, that they were putting themselves at risk trying to handle it alone. They didn't rely on the pack. On their friends. On him. And his impostor syndrome kicks him off on a spiral. But it doesn't take much to pull him out of it, not when Darlin' is finally back in his life.

As mates, Ash is the Will Smith red carpet meme. He wants everyone to look at his mate, to know that he's their mate and they're soooo in love!! It drives poor Darlin' insane.

And he can get away with it!! And damn near anything because Darlin' is so weak to Ash's puppy dog eyes. They have been since they were teens. If Asher wants a grilled cheese at 3 AM all he has to do is flash those eyes and Darlin' is hauling themselves out of bed, but grumbling about it the entire way.

Asher and Darlin' spend a lot of downtime gaming together. They trade recommendations back and forth, play each other's favorites, and terrorize everyone else who ends up in their lobbies. Darlin' can get a little heated and toxic during PVP but it's always defused by Asher doing an uwu voice and making Darlin' choke on their laughter.

David and Milo are happier than Asher when they finally get together, they've been listening to his lovesick pining for years and they're TIRED.

David

aka the character that got me into shipping Darlin' with their pack members

David and Darlin have such an interesting dynamic!! The devoted pack alpha and the wayward lone wolf. They both have strong personalities and we've seen them come into conflict with each other

But there's love there. There always has been.

I fully believe that in a David/Darlin' relationship, it'd be a case of he fell first and fell harder. It wasn't love at first sight, David's a bit too cynical for that even before his dad died. But there was a pull to the newcomer that drew him in and helping them settle in wasn't just because of his role as beta.

They were always there, in the background of David, Milo, and Asher's teenage years but never front and center. Always on the fringes, like they never found their footing. Something he wouldn't notice until it was too late.

Then Gabriel dies and Darlin' got together with Quinn. Instead of being distant, they're absent entirely. David knows that Quinn is their mate but something about that burns at his core, makes him feel queasy and unsettled. Like it's wrong. But htere's nothing he can do, he has a pack to run and protect.

The anger and hurt he feels when he finds out that they've been lying to him for so long. That they're trying to hunt down Quinn on their own, so stubborn and self-destructive. The fact that they consider themselves expendable and would risk breaking themselves to avenge their friend and protect the pack. He wants to shake them by the shoulders and tell them they're loved but he knows it'll be better to show them instead.

The pack meeting goes better than he hoped, with members both scolding and reassuring Darlin' of their place and their value. He watches them the whole time out of the corner of his eye and he says it's because he wants to make sure they don't bolt but he knows deep down he's just happy to see them back where they belong

The road to becoming mates is even more bumpy with Darlin' than it would be with Angel. He has to balance being their alpha and their partner and he already feels like he's failed them as a leader, they couldn't even trust him about Quinn.

The shift to being mates came with no small amount of arguing. Darlin' likes to fight with David on just about everything and it drives him crazy. It doesn't matter what it is, big or small it's always some kind of fight or contest and it makes his blood boil but at the same time he loves that little sparkle they get in their eye whenever they challenge him.

When there's a pack run and they're all shifted there's a 100% chance that Darlin' is gonna slam into David's flank and snap at him. Doesn't matter how many times he tells them to stop over the link, they're always going to start shit in a way even Asher wouldn't try.

Honestly, it's like David has two betas the way Darlin' and Asher flank him. And Darlin' isn't above mean-mugging clients if they think they aren't being taken seriously. (again, David tells them to stop. They don't.)

Scary movie nights are even more fun when David and Darlin' are sat next to each other, the contrast makes Darlin's abject terror even more hilarious.

[sucuretcannelle]

hi! i briefly remember you saying that you're into if's, so i was wondering what your favorites are

Sighs and shakes a red cup full of ice

Nobody thinks I'm a nerd till they hear the way I talk about interactive fiction...no one knows...

Anyway I started playing IF's in like December. Time flies

This is kind of in order? Of like enjoyment. HOWEVER take this with a grain of salt because I was sitting here trying to rearrange them (except the top 3) for 40 minutes. If it was mentioned, it's good 🙂‍↕️

1. The six that thrive by @the-six-that-thrive-if —

the way I was playing this bro. I wouldn't let myself sleep until I was done with the demo and not because it felt like I had to, but I knew I would be PISSED if I went to bed without absorbing all the content (Dante give me a chance PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏). Anyway the hierarchy system reminds me of the one that I have for the way I wrote hell and I was like 🫵 OMG THATS SO COOL.

Key factor that I appreciate: Dialogue, descriptions, and transitions. Dante is deadass so funny I'm not even playing bro. Buddy how do you write like that, lmk. Also the official art has me gnawing at the bars of my enclosure

2. College Tennis: Origin Story by @collegetennisoriginstory — I ACTUALLY HAVE A FUCKING PROBLEM BRO. LOOK. IN MY HEAD, I WAS IGNORING THAT THEY WERE PLAYING TENNIS SO I WAS VISUALIZING VOLLEYBALL. SO AT SOME POINT I READ THE WORD RACKET AND I WAS LIKE WHAT ARE WE PLAYING???

Key factor that I appreciate: Skill checks, attention to side characters, amazing use of character tropes. Idk how to describe it but the writing felt so CLEAN. Like so organized and orderly. Plus I wanna study all of the characters under a microscope

3. Superstition (omg first IF I ever played) by @13leaguestories — I played this while I was sick and that's literally all I did for 2 days besides eating and sleeping. Am I okay? Yeah cuz it happened in December but like I was OBSESSED. And ashamed. My friend told me i would be into Zillah and she was right. I haven't recovered. I promise I'm in therapy.

Key factor that I appreciate: The fact that there was always something going on. Literally at least 3 things were happening at the same time, all the time, and it kept my lil depressed ass stimulated. Who could ask for more

4. Infamous by @infamous-if — this game makes me scared of commitment cuz I can't have Orion and Griffin😐 I might be biased because. I sing! So I was just really connected to this story immediately. Either way, one of my favs cuz the writing is saurrrr good, makes ya feel

Key factor that I appreciate — Infamous is generally well rounded, so I don't feel like it's LACKING in anything. Me gusta.

5. Mind blind by @mindblindbard — I have a problem so I'm a stereotypical Rosie fan. But anyway I personally loved this one because of the world building, even tho I'm a character-focused girlie. Plus the game is so funny for no reason

Key factor that I appreciate— I actually really like the MC in general. Which is funny to say, because they're supposed to be you, but MC's are different from game to game, and I like this one

6. Soulmates Inc by @soulmatesinc-if — idk with some games, it's just the vibe. Like the vibe is right so I'll read it (which like...it's hard for me to find games where the vibe is what drags me along. Tis really good)

Key factor I appreciate — Wyatt. omg who said that...I also love this game's take on soulmates. It's simple, but original, and I fw it

7. Nine Blood Dances by @nineblooddances-if— I'm boutta cry, how did you end up here twice without me noticing bro. Idk this one and TSTT have like, vibes that are connected by a small string, and I did play this one first if that matters.

Key factor that I enjoyed: It felt very structured, and again, clean. I really don't know what this feeling is

8. When Twilight Strikes by @evertidings — I love ALL the characters because damn near all of them pissed me off once. That's actually impressive /pos. Anyway Rylan hit my line

Key factor that I enjoyed: watching my relationship descriptions change. Some left me devastated stop... Like sorry A you're driving me nuts...

Honorable mentions:

Apartment 502 by @apt502-if — I can't wait to see the future parts cuz like I like it but I cant analyze any of the characters yet. But trust me I'm ready 📝

The Kings Hound by @the-kingshound — Same typa situation was Apartment 502... I'm waiting...patiently 📝

[shadebloopnik]

Some really messy sketches on a small little AU with Carmilla as a Fallen Angel Warrior.

Different from the Exorcists who slaughter Sinners, and more dedicated to the actual protection of Heaven against the darker forces. The designs haven't been thought out much, but I like drawing the horns, so I thought it'd be a cool warrior hairdo, like how Exorcists wore demonic masks (I was really bored in class okay-)

Her daughters, Odette and Clara are there too. They looked pretty different even as twins, which were a bit of an oddity at the time. They were often made to dress alike, and act alike. Most viewed them as a package deal rather than taking time to understand their individuality.

Its why they're dressed so freely in hell, relishing in how different they can be whilst still having a great bond.

Her daughters are ultimately what causes her to fall. Drawing the half horn half hair down style looked a lot cooler in my head, but it was fun regardless.

Some secret regarding her daughters get found out, Heaven making her choose to either cast her daughters down or join them. Carmilla didn't hesitate.

More info on the AU/fic in the cut belowww:

I dunno if im ever gonna expand on it, but I loved the idea of making it Zestmilla. Maybe Carmilla met the old Overlord in one of her trips in hell, maybe fighting in a battle there? Or helping establish order? Anyway, she was alone when she met Zestial, and the two were quiet the enemies when they met. They fought, though didn't aim to kill, resulting in a close fight with Carmilla as victor. She wasn't an Exorcist warrior, and saw no need to immediately end this Overlord. She wasn't sent there to do mindless murder, and would like to avoid useless battles if she could. Besides, he was polite enough, and though she didn't trust him, he didn't grate on her nerves either. Zestial was quite taken with her, suspicious and quite murderous towards an angel, but liked her well enough for her wit and level headedness. Her grace and skill in battle was also admirable.

They bump into each other many more times, over the course of Carmilla's visits to hell, and with each meeting, they turn a bit more cordial, even striking an unlikely friendship, that blossoms into much more. It takes them about a hundred or so years(bc i LOVE relationships that REAAAALLLY take the time to develop and build on that trust and love) before they become romantically involved. They seem like the couple who would take it slow, being cautious and not rushing anything less it would harm the other.

And though Carmilla's trips to hell were halted, their love was not for naught as she gave birth to Clara and Odette. Her one regret was not being able to give Zestial the great news, he would've been an amazing father.

She manages to hide their identities for a good while. The two had rather angelic features, wings and all, and humanoid forms unlike their father's. The only thing that pointed to their demonic heritage were their eyes, whose sclera was the same shade of red as her iris. It was easily hidden with simple spells though. The two girls bore quite the resemblance towards her, even with some oddities, and were left fairly alone, being able to remain undetected for decades.

(I just left this post to sketch this out real quick lol, just to get the coloring in mind, not set on the design but I dont mind it.)

The peace couldn't last. After a while with Odette and Clara still being considered young as angels, their secret gets out. Maybe the spells wore off, or by a slip of the tongue, but for some reason or another it gets found out that they're half demons. They were attacked, and the daughters were stripped of their wings and sentenced to be cast down to Hell, left at the mercy of the next Extermination. Carmilla was given a chance to redeem herself and stand back, and let her "mistakes" be washed clean.

Carmilla fought back, her wingless daughters clutching to her own feathers for protection. She scooped them up, flying away to hell, less they get any more damaged. Try as she might, however, they didn't manage to escape unscathed. She plummeted into Hell; feeling the curses and painful burn of magic at her back, nipping at her form.

It was as if Heaven and Hell itself tore her apart with her descent, both pulling with reckless abandon, shaping her into what they wanted.

She couldn't even afford to lose consciousness; she had her daughters to protect after all. Both girls were weak and bleeding, their backs aching from where their wings used to be. Carmilla glanced at her own feathers, and felt her heart break. It looked just as painful as it felt. Her once sleek and razor sharp looking feathers were nearly singed beyond repair. She retracted them, less she attract more enemies with them in display.

She struggled to get up, carrying her daughters with her despite the weakness in her legs. She didn't even have her spear with her, weaponless except for the ballet slippers she'd forged herself with angelic steel. Her hair was down and unruly, all three of them covered in burns and cuts and bruises and bleeding wounds. The attack came out of nowhere. Her daughters weren't even given a chance to defend themselves.

Weaponless. It can't happen again.

She manages to drag her daughters with her, only one place she could think of approaching. Its been decades since she's been to Hell, she hopes the territories didn't change too much. She was hesitant in going to Zestial for help. After all, its been years, and she'd left without being able to say goodbye. He'd be justified in hating her, and she wouldn't hold it against him. At the least, they could hide somewhere in his territory. His lands were one of the best choices, the demons residing under his rule were fairly disciplined. In a place as dangerous as Hell, an environment that was fairly familiar to her gave some bit of comfort. Even if he didn't accept them, even if he was unaware of their existence, Carmilla was satisfied with simply a place to rest.

She needed not worry though. As soon as Zestial heard the slightest news about strangers in his territory, he rushed to meet them himself. He noticed the large crash just some hours before night fell, and couldn't help the spark of hope. He was greeted by the sight of a few dead bodies, 1 or 2 who thought they could get lucky taking advantage of a weakened opponent. He arrived just in time to see a third fall, bloodied heels clicking on the ground below. The figure stood tall, though was clearly tired and heaving deep breaths. He barely noticed the two smaller figures in the distance, his gaze focused solely upon the lone woman, whose silver hair was still so beautiful even with all the dirt and blood matting it. He stepped closer, the sound of it causing the woman to turn and-

It didn't matter how dark it was. It didn't matter how her sclera was now the same shade of red as her iris were, as if it were inverted. He'd recognize her anywhere.

Without caring that he'd get stabbed himself, he rushed to pull her in a tight embrace, feeling her freeze beneath his arms. He buried his face in her hair, nuzzling it even with the blood and dirt, afraid as though she'd disappear if he ever let go.

He felt her large hands wrap around him and for the first time since his existence in Hell, he felt as if he could cry. This was real. This wasn't a figment of his imagination, nor a result of insanity. She was here. After all these years she came back to him. He couldn't be happier.

He immediately takes her and the two girls back to his residence, letting them clean up and helping patch their wounds. When he found out the two were his daughters, he felt as if- yea no, he was crying, this wasn't just a feeling, he couldn't stop the tears from streaming down as he hugged the two as firmly as he could without aggravating their wounds. He felt so angry for them, enraged that heaven could deal out such punishments for something the girls couldn't control.

He took them all in, preparing rooms for everyone. He prepared one for Carmilla too, not wanting to push his luck. It has been years after all, and he didn't want to force himself onto her should she decide she didn't reciprocate anymore. In the end, they all slept in the same room. Carmilla wanted to be with Zestial, feeling safer with someone else in the room to stand guard, and her daughters crawled back to her, far too afraid to sleep in such a new place alone after everything that happened.

So they all snuggled in the same large bed, Zestial keeping a respectful distance from the young girls as to not frighten them, all the while letting his webbed cloak wrap around Carmilla in comfort.

Carmilla fell asleep last, her thoughts running wild. It was all so much, but right now, here with her daughters in her arms and under Zestial's embrace, she felt at peace for the first time in a long while.

Glancing at the mirror across the room, she hummed at the changes in her eyes. The only thing she could think of was how was that she finally matched her daughters. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all, she'd think, drifting off into sleep.

[mayakern]

I second the person who was talking about polyester being the sticking point for the shirts--I've been following for ages because I love your design sense and color choices, but I don't wear skirts much and between overheating issues & personal sustainability goals I've stopped buying synthetic fabrics. I LOVE the designs and several of them are in color combos I'd love to have in my button-up wardrobe, but alas I know I will not wear a polyester shirt. I'm mentally comparing them to Morningwitch, who does similar graphic cotton short sleeve button-ups for $50 each, and I'd be willing to potentially pay more than that for something as striking as the desert sunset button-up in 100% cotton (idk how scales/suppliers compare), but it would *probably* just be one if the price went any higher. Anyways, I'm wishing you good luck! Sucks about the numbers. They are really stunning designs.

i adore polina's work! i have a couple of her old button ups, which use the same fabric mine have now, but i haven't bought any of her cotton ones so i'm not sure if they're a texture i could wear or not.

(i have unfortunately had bad luck with other small artist natural fiber button ups and found them too rough for my textural sensitivities, so between that and me already owning enough clothing, i haven't bought any more in quite a while)

it's also important to note that polina spent an entire year (maybe longer) and a not insignificant amount of money searching for a natural fiber option for her shirts and that because shirts are her staple item (like skirts are mine), she sells significantly more of them than i do (even before making the switch to cotton), which enables her to drive down her PPU (price per unit) slightly and also charge less for them.

also, when the issue of sustainability comes up, it's not as simple as natural fiber vs. synthetic fiber. everything from the high cost in water for growing cotton, to the fuel cost for transporting it, and then its shorter lifespan (which is part of the point, i know, that natural fiber degrades faster, but it also means longterm you are buying more garments), as well as ethical concerns about labor rights...

in my experience when it comes to being a small brand functioning at my size or smaller, you can typically pick one of the following (if even that): natural fiber, ethical labor, or affordable price point. i have personally chosen to prioritize ethical labor over everything else while doing my best to keep my price points as reasonable as possible without undercutting myself. payroll and office space are expensive. 😅

of course, if you sell a higher volume, you can not only negotiate a lower PPU based on volume of sales (a factory will make more money from your business if you buy 10,000 shirts for $10/piece than if you buy 1,000 shirts for $12/piece*) but you can also get away with a lower margin because you're expecting to sell more units to customers. imagine selling 10,000 shirts for $25/ea instead of 1,000 for $35/ea. even with a profit margin of $15/ea instead of $23/ea, you would only need to sell about 1,534 shirts of your 10,000 to make the same net profit and you'd have almost another 8500 shirts you could keep selling.

*these are not real numbers just an example for easy math and to show how stupid manufacturing math is

[covenofthearticulate]

Ash please I am begging you for the detailed version of your Louis’ Room at Trinity Gate headcanons 🫢 I gotta know it ALL

HI HELLO OKAY LET'S FUCKING DO THIS

so the thing about Louis' rooms at Trinity Gate is that I absolutely believe they're a bit of a cluster fuck. And that is 100% on purpose. The rest of the mansion is so meticulously designed and so incredibly ornate, that Louis' room is purposefully a lot more simple in comparison (it is not actually simple by any means— when I say simple I mostly mean that there's no insane baroque murals on the ceiling or intricately patterned wallpaper or mountains of crown molding on every wall).

Louis' bedroom is his only real sanctuary in the house where he's not expected to be the Head of Household or the Gracious Host. It's also the only room that won't give him immediate Sensory Overload on the nights when the new blood makes everything feel Too Much. So all that being said: I imagine Louis' room is still an interior design dream come true, it's filled with lots of modern luxuries and is very rich, but at the same time it's the most lived in room in the house, so it's cluttered and messy and just very weird looking!!

OKAY LET'S DIVE IN:

Honestly I'd be remiss if I didn't start off by just dropping in some inspo pics from some of my favorite scenic design of all time, from Only Lovers Left Alive because I think Eve's bedroom and Adam's parlour both radiate Louis Vibes

like, look at all of her BOOKS!!! they're everywhere lmfao, the room is so big but it feels so crowded and intimate and even though she's alone on the bed/on the floor she doesn't feel lonely. it's a perfect little nest, and I definitely think Louis is guilty of leaving piles and piles of books around his room just because he likes the feeling of being surrounded by them. those are his comfort Dostoyevsky's.

At the same time, Adam's place is also just so painfully Louis to me with all the clutter from across the centuries:

like the furniture is beautiful and there was clear aesthetic intention once upon a time, but it's so overrun with shit...there are record crates, but also a walkman and headphones on the coffee table...there's a tv remote with no tv?? there's a fucking candelabra on the middle of the table? I just love it so much, it feels very Louis to me because in my mind even when he's mentally doing okay, Louis strikes me as one of those people who will keep lots of shit lying around.

He's not a material person in the way Lestat is, but sometimes it just doesn't really occur to him that he can just throw stuff away, and also I think he's really fascinated and sentimental about certain Human Things. Like I've said this before, but I've always headcanoned that he likes to keep all the slips of paper and makeshift bookmarks he finds in his secondhand books— occasionally Armand will organize them into a pile or tuck them into a drawer, but otherwise that kind of stuff you'll find scattered about Louis' bedside table, dresser top, and and writing desk.

ANYWAY so at Trinity Gate I think Louis' room itself is surprisingly small, and that's on purpose too. it's meant to be something intimate, so really the only furniture is the bed, a writing desk, some bedside tables, and maybe a small plush armchair for him to sit and read in. a lot of the design and layout is inspired by his familiar late 18th century style, but with a much more modern touch.

I know for a FACT Louis has a fancy four-poster bed, and it's a queen, not a king. He doesn't like all that extra space, he only needs enough for him and Armand to be comfortable in (space gets tight when Lestat sleeps over, but that's okay).

The bedding itself probably isn't too ornate— maybe a sage or navy colored duvet and matching pillow set. No patterns or anything fancy on the bedding, just one straight color. Hanging from the four posters are drapes that Louis absolutely utilizes when he wants a little Extra Privacy. It's also something he's used to from his mortal days (re: sleeping with mosquito netting in louisiana) so it's just muscle memory for him to let down the drapes once he knows he's going to be settling in for the evening.

For reference, I imagine something similar to the structure on the left, with the bedding set on the right

Actually the photo on the right is very similar to how I picture other aspects of Louis' room: the bookshelves in the wall, the cool gem toned walls, accented with a bit of crown molding but nothing too ornate.

I also love the idea of Louis only having a single painting decorating the wall, but I've always liked to imagine that it's a piece that Armand had made for him, hand-painted as a birthday or anniversary gift. Louis hangs it right above his bed and likes to stare up at it upon waking in the early evening.

And don't even THINK of bringing in overhead lighting into his room!!!! He NEEDS yellow gaslight sconce things on his wall!!

okay and lastly, I like to think that even though his room is quite small, he does have spaces carved out for all his lovers. Lestat likes to drape himself dramatically on the little ottoman at the foot of the bed and hang with his hair down as he talks for hours with Louis. Armand likes to perch on top of the writing desk like a cat, toying with all the little trinkets Louis has there, or occasionally flipping through his journals and books just to scribble little love notes in the margins.

Sorry I've gone on for too long but YEAH thinking about character's spaces is just such an interesting way to get to know them!! I am never not imagining all of the intricacies of Louis' bedroom!!!! Please I love him so much!!!

[thespectatingcrow]

Indigo Park rant

Okay, so Game Theory came out with a theory of Indigo Park and honestly I was a little underwhelmed. The visual storytelling is SUPER important to understand the things going on, and there were a couple of things that they didn't point out.

First off, this statue of Lloyd behind his Mane Stage.

This statue clearly went together with the statue of the founder at the entrance, or at least that's how I see it, and this (along with other things I'll point out) shows that Rambley has an issue against Lloyd for other reasons than simple jealousy.

This statue and the idea that Lloyd used to be much more used is supported with the description of Lloyd's plush.

This plush ^ gets a reply of "ew, Lloyd..." from Rambley, something I think is there partially for a laugh- same with the "*sigh*.. hey there, Lloyd." and "great show, Lloyd." comments on the Rambley Railroad ride- but I can't help but think Lloyd was originally the main face of Indigo Park. The charismatic look of Lloydford L. Lion's design strikes me as something that Isaac Indigo would have used to bring people in. As time passed, they tried to make some money with a retro plush version of Lloyd when their popularity died down. Lloyd wasn't as popular with the younger generation anymore, so they made Rambley!!

Rambley and Lloyd were shown to be buddies through a drawn photo on Rambley's Railroad:

But personally I don't think this shows us that they were friends. Rambley came in and suddenly everyone at Indigo Park needed to get used to people asking why there's less Lloyd items, why the Lloyd rides were being changed, etc etc. This image is a way for Isaac Indigo to be like "hey guys!! Rambley is the new face, and Lloyd is totally okay with this so you should be too! it's a new era!!"

I'm sure Rambley had his reasons for disliking Lloyd, and I can't say what those were since we haven't gotten much content between them, but Rambley clearly has feelings about the others so I'm sure he can somehow have complex memories and emotion for the other mascots.

I like the idea that the people at Game Theory had with the people at Indigo Park using animals to try and make the mascots come to life, that's something I'll admit here, but I also dislike that they're making Rambley out to be a super big bad AI and that he's gonna try and manipulate us into helping him become real.

I don't have as much evidence right now for that ^ but I doubt that Rambley is attempting to be evil or malicious. The player, the ONE PERSON who has been to the park in over 2000 days, is the only chance Rambley has to help his friends get back to normal. The player is the single chance he has to restore things, even if it's a fever dream Rambley and the player both have a strong connection to the park so I don't see why people can't accept that the player would just want to help Rambley get the park back up again.

Anyway, that's the *ramble* I wanted to do. I love Lloydford L. Lion so much and I can't wait to see more of the world the people behind the project build :)

[luimagines]

Dang you really got me on that Links in Our World brainrot. How dare you write such fun and interesting stories lol.

Anyway. Now I'm pondering what if the reader used the LoZ games as escapism when they were younger because their life kinda sucked. Like.

Link: How could you just play our adventures like that? How could you treat our trauma as a game???

Reader: You had people that cared about you. Playing the games was the only way I could experience that as a kid. And your problems seemed so simple. The solution was straightforward: stab the villian in the face, and the game was over. I couldn't fix my problems that way. The only thing I could do was wait it out until I was old enough to leave. Once, I got it into my head that I couldn't wait any longer. But I was only halfway through Link's Awakening. I decided I would finish the game first, and then got stuck on a dungeon for months. I'm sorry that some of the worst moments of your lives are used as children's entertainment, but... I don't think I'd still be here without them, you know?

I still think that it would be a little harder for them to wrap their heads around it, but I fully see where they're coming from.

I think that they would also have to see the nature of the games themselves because the way things are painted aren't inherently dark and doom and gloom and evil. You know?

A lot of the Zelda games are shown in a more lighthearted sense where you want to explore and accomplish good for the sake of being good. It's about love and community and being the light when things are dark. So like-.... surely that has to strike a cord with them as well.

[penpinetree]

Rhythm Doctor's tutorials are perfect and why subdivision beats are my favorite mechanic (SPOILERS FOR ACT 5)

before we get into spoilers: Rhythm doctor is a one button rhythm game where you apply defibrillation to numerous characters who each have their own tempo, mechanics and stories as to why they're at middle sea hospital, the game has a great story, amazing characters, and a simple (at first) gimmick, push the button on the 7th beat. its a good game, you should totally play it, and I recommend not reading this post if you haven't, if you have played it, then listen to me word vomit for a minute.

Act 5 is about subversion, even before the act officially starts the game tricks you into thinking it'll be a fun little baseball themed act

the entire act takes place in a new (to you) ward where you've overheard from two other patients that a popular baseball player has just been admitted there.

immediately you'll notice that this is not a ward in a hospital, this is a baseball field, strange, but whatever, doesn't matter. this song introduces a new gimmick, subdivision notes, which are a type of SVT beat (i realize i didn't explain those, basically you're given a get, set, go count and have to hit the beat on go) subdivision beats are simple (at first) where all you need to do is listen for a queue and hit more than one note.

they look like this (it was so hard to time snipping tool to get these). the top image is for a double subdivision and the bottom is for a triple subdivision the tutorial for these notes is really good at getting you used to these types of notes being matched with each other and regular notes respectively and you'll have a good grip on them by the end of it.

the song starts out in the same field that going into the physiotherapy ward brought you to, and the music is nice, mostly just a test to see if you have the subdivision beats down by now.

that is until you reach this point and a baseball suddenly flies into the screen, putting the song to a pause and pulling away the curtain.

it was a dream, this is lucky, the baseball player who was admitted to middlesea hospital for tearing their rotator cuff during a game. after a quick cutscene the song starts again, cutting back to the baseball field, except it's no longer a dream, it's a nightmare, its pouring rain, baseballs fall from the sky in larger and larger amounts, every now and then you can see the eyes of Lucky's fellow teammates staring at you from the dugout. and then it happens, my favorite part of act 5, the one queue that made me fall in love with this game for a third time.

FOUR! TONK-TONK-TONK-TONK

all of the sudden you're hit with a quadruple subdivision beat, they didn't teach you this, lightning strikes in the background as its called out, normally this would be bad game design, throwing something at you out of nowhere without explaining how you're supposed to deal with it. but you hit the notes anyway, because by now you've learned to ignore the visual cues and go based off of the game's rhythm, because the queue's "Tonks" are also in tempo with how quickly you have to hit the divided notes, so without making a sweat you hit the notes perfectly, even while the nightmare sequence starts to fall apart, telling lucky to wake up, you still hit every note perfectly until the end of the song

at the end of the song the screen zooms out from lucky, and you're shown the real physiotherapy ward, this room will no longer look like the baseball field unless you go to it on a new save, act 5 is such a good example of why this game is so dear to my heart (haha) and if you still somehow haven't played it, please, just buy it, give the developers your money.

[adobe-outdesign]

What do you think of the various fruit and vegetable Chias?

Chias are one of those all-time classic Neopets that are probably one of the first things that pop in your head when you think of the site (or they are for me, at least). Design-wise, they're about as simple as you get; a simple oval-ish torso with basic feet and arms, a bit of hair, and permanently closed eyes.

I'd argue that what makes them so memorable is less their design and more their other attributes—for example, their fruit colors (more on that below) and their tendency to get hunted by Lupes. Adding traits like that to a pet helps them stand out amongst other Neopets and is just fun all around.

I'd argue that Chias benefited from customization, because while they were saddled with a fist, they also had very old art that needed updated anyway. The converted design is pretty faithful to the original, just doing things like improving the shading, lengthening the arms so they don't look so stubby, detailing the hair more, etc. It also fixed a lot of the weird, misshaped parts of the original, such as the right foot and even the overall body.

The big improvement though was removing the godforsaken lip. It just looked so out of place and weirdly detailed for an otherwise very simplistic pet, and while it's nice that it drew the darker accent color through the design, it definitely looks better without it. Granted, I do wish that the converted mouth was up a bit closer to the eyes and the eyes were a bit more curved like the original, but I'll take what we got if it means that lip isn't there.

Favorite Colours:

One of the Chia's most iconic attributes is that they can be changed into a variety of fruit and veg shapes, both real and fantasy, via Magical Chia Pops. Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of good non-fruit/veg Chia colors (I love how Maraquan's a sea cucumber, how Relic has ferns for hair, etc.), but if you're getting a Chia, there's a pretty good chance you're after the fruit/veg designs. They're all pretty good, but for the purposes of this review I just picked out the ones I think are particularly interesting.

Onion: Onion is a super basic design, yet it still manages to delight me. I think it's the lack of arms; it's the only Chia color that doesn't retain them, and something about that just makes it 100% more appealing. I also like how nicely the feet compliment the body and some of the subtler details, like the striping.

Pepper: While lots of Chias change shape, the pepper Chia is probably one of the most extreme examples of this, and all the better for it. I love how skinny it is compared to a regular Chia, and things like the stem shape really add to the design. I also have to highlight the shading and highlights, which are particularly well done here, and how there's some very subtle speckling over the body that helps the design from feeling too flat.

Juppie: Rounding off the list with a Neopets-specific fruit, the Juppie Chia actually existed pre-customization but went unreleased for years. I'm honestly not sure why; it's a great addition. Perhaps it's because, while juppies come in a lot of colors, this blue swirled design is exclusive to the Juppie Chia. At any rate, it's nice to see an iconic Neopets' fruit get a colour, and I really like how striking the swirls and the cream/blue palette art.

BONUS: While I think the body's a bit too ovular (something that the pre-conversion version didn't have going on) and the shading's pretty rudimentary, the pea Chia is fun and iconic in its own right just because it's extremely tiny and looks like a super attack pea. Good stuff.

[imsiriuslyreading]

alright so i finished reading the oldest recipe for parsnip soup and its got me thinking so much honestly.

first up, as always, the wonderful writer that is eyra has absolutely outdone themselves once again and wrangled that magic of theirs in that way that only they can do. If you haven't read it yet, please please do. you will fall so far in love i cannot possibly warn you sufficiently.

anyway its got me thinking a couple things:

we are so so bloody lucky in the fanfic community/fandom to have access to stories like this. they're beautiful, relatable and so bloody thought-provoking. they often, respectfully, shit all over so many of the published books i read that i have to put them down and do a little emotional support lap.

2. the second thing is that any time i read a representation of neurodiverse people, i pay such close attention to how the people around them treat that character. so like, their friends or their family or people in shops and strangers on the street. and as someone who has a little touch of the spicy brain, but more importantly, is friends with many, many wonderful people who sit in this colourful category, it strikes me how much it hits when these characters are treated in a way that is kind, and effortless. Like, it's actually not hard, y'know? I hear stories of how my friends are often treated by other friends of theirs and I just think, it's actually not a difficult thing to accommodate you. and not infantilize you. and yet...

I had a friend recently tell me how well i can read them for what their needs are in a variety of situations, and how grateful they are for that. and I just feel like... the bar is in hell. because it's not difficult. its literally not rocket science. its certainly not something i have to ponder over.

so when I read something like this fic in particular, where James is so cognizant of Sirius and the sort of actions and conversations that will help him thrive, it just fucking hits different. it feels effortless and unimportant. because... well, it should be.

same as how remus' friends treat him in kill your darlings by messermoon.

it's so simple, but it's so incredibly easy to be aware, and to be inclusive.

[casdeans-pie]

Hi! First off, love your fics. They brighten my day. and your latte art is cool too.

Secondly, I've seen that you've gone to a few cons and I was curious what tips you'd give a baby con-goer who's going to their first spn con in a month? Also, what should I bring to have signed for an auto?

This might be a weird ask but I don't know who else to ask for con tips lol.

Hi Anon! Thanks so much !! ❤️ happy you're enjoying the stories! I have like a bazillion wips buzzing around my brain at all times so there will be plenty more!

And I genuinely wish I could pass you all supernatural themed coffees through my phone honestly lmaooo

Oooh!! First spn con! That's exciting because my first one wasn't objectively 'the best' but to. this. day it remains my favourite. It's so special to me. It'll be so so good you'll love it. The vibe at these kinds of cons is unmatched because spn fans are literally the friendliest people out there

Nothing quite like the bonds spn fans forge in The Queues. One big tip I'd give is to strike up a conversation with the folks around you - ask what they're getting signed or what poses they're doing - boom! Queue Friends.

Get all of your QR codes or tickets ready in the order you're gonna need them, so there's no panicking when you go for autos or photos. And definitely get a hard folder to put your autographed prints/photo ops in.

Don't forget a bottle of water! And lots of snacks!! And a portable charger/battery pack for your phone!! Mine dies in like a few hours so the extra power is a must.

Enjoy the very special vibe - soak up the atmosphere! There's just, a crazy amount of joy and hype at these things and if I could find a way to bottle it I would

As for stuff to get signed - it depends if you want a print of a character or not, cause usually they have those available at the signing itself on a desk nearby. So you wouldn't have to worry about taking anything. And the character prints always look rad with the signature on. OR you could get a dvd signed? Some artwork? Spn book? Some obscure merch you found? (my favourite kind)

Anyway I've rambled long enough lmao sorry anon you asked me a simple question and I have shot off into the stratosphere of long winded replies

It's not a weird question at all! The funny thing is that when you've done more (because there's always more spn cons) you'll look back on your first like, ah I didn't know what I was letting myself in for..... Addiction is such a negative word, but I'm struggling to think of another.... lmaoooo

Have an amazing time!!!

[canonicallyobserving911]

WIP Wednesday

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

Season 7 FANON Speculation: Buddie Multi-Chapter Fanfic - Hiatus Reading: “I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Chapter 16 is available on AO3 and Chapter 17 will be posted soon.

Currently 16 chapters completed: 549.4K Words Rated: Mature

One chapter will be posted at a time.

I'm excited to finish writing Chapter 17 because there's a lot happening as Buck and Eddie continue to prepare for everything that's going to happen in the next seven weeks.

For anyone who hasn't read Chapter 16, here's a brief overview: Buck and Eddie hired a travel agent to help them schedule everything for their upcoming international adventure. They also hired a tax accountant for the 12-million-dollar settlement money Buck was awarded after the sperm donor lawsuit ended and they hired a financial advisor so they could invest some of it.

They'll tie the knot before Christmas 2023 but they are NOT getting married in the U.S. and they won't have a wedding ceremony until May 2024. Currently, they think Chris is the only person who knows they're together but now several people have witnessed their romantic and emotionally intimate moments including Bobby, Chimney, Athena, Hen, Karen, Maddie and Ravi. Even though Adriana is in El Paso, she realized Eddie and Buck are together too.

Who else is going to realize they're together in Chapter 17?

___________

Here's a snippet from Chapter 17 of a call Buck gets early one morning while Eddie's on shift.

___________

Buck slowly wakes up out of a deep sleep when his cellphone starts ringing.  He opens his eyes, looks at the clock on the nightstand and wonders who would be calling him at 4:12AM.

He wipes his eyes, clears his throat then he sticks his arm out from underneath the comforter to grab his cellphone.  He looks at the caller ID and when he sees Bobby’s name, he immediately sits up in bed and goes on full alert because he wouldn’t be calling this time of morning unless it was an emergency.

He slides his finger across the screen and in his rough and raspy voice, he answers, “Bobby?”

“Buck?!”

Instantly, he recognizes Bobby’s speaking in his captain’s voice.  He knows it well because he’s heard it many times over the last seven years.  It’s always distinct and different from his regular speaking voice whenever he’s about to deliver bad news to a victim’s family.

Everything starts happening in slow motion and to him it feels like ginger ale is floating around in his skull.  He also feels like he’s drowning because his eyes aren’t focused and it seems like he’s looking through some cloudy water that might be filled with debris or swimming pool cleaner or something else but he's not sure.

A few seconds pass and he realizes the reason he’s having a difficult time seeing is because his eyes are full of tears.

Any words he’s planning to speak get choked in his throat because realization sets in and he knows Bobby’s calling because something bad happened.

His voice is just above a squeak when he whisper asks, “What is it?”

“Buck, listen to me... I need you to meet me Cedars Sinai.”

There’s a lump in his throat now because he knows that tone but he asks anyway, “Why?”

“It’s Eddie…”

He can’t hear anything else after he hears Eddie’s name because a high-pitched noise starts ringing in his ears.

What happened to Eddie? 🧐

How is Buck going to handle it when he arrives at the hospital? 👀

Will he be in a catatonic state of shock like he was after the shooting? 🤷🏽‍♀️

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Fic Summary: Months after Buck and Eddie were hit by the same lightning strike; they’re still struggling with the aftermath of it.  But before they make their love confessions, they’ll spend time getting to know themselves as individuals first. Eddie learns to enjoy the simple things in life as he participates in activities on his own and with new friends while Buck learns the rest of the 31-year-old deep dark family secret about his conception and birth. Their journey to forever is still a work in progress but once they finally admit they’re in love with each other, everything that follows their love confessions will be cataclysmic.

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Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1 - Eddie makes a new friend while Buck receives devastating news regarding the sperm donation he made for Connor and Kameron.

Chapter 2 - Buck does a lot of research to learn more about the abnormalities found in his red blood cells and Eddie starts a new therapy journey that’s all about him and not the traumas he’s experienced.

Chapter 3 - After more than a month, Buck and Eddie finally spend time together outside of work but it doesn’t end well and they part with a lot of uncertainty regarding their places in each other’s lives.

Chapter 4 - Eddie has a few realizations about his life which causes him to consider moving back to El Paso, TX while Buck continues to be reminded of his past which causes him to take an impromptu road trip across America.

Chapter 5 - Both Buck and Eddie have difficult conversations with their parents and Buck finally learns the truth behind the reason why his mother despised him while Eddie finally tells his mother about the way she tries to control him.

Chapter 6 - More than two weeks after Buck pushed Eddie away after suggesting they needed a break; Eddie decides to try again. Eddie’s there for Buck when he’s at his worst just like Buck was there for him when he was at his worst and he won’t let Buck give up.

Chapter 7 - After Buck’s mental breakdown, Eddie has his back the same way Buck had his when he had his own breakdown more than a year ago.  They share several vulnerable and emotionally intimate moments with one another and they begin to realize their small, sweet and caring gestures matter just as much if not more than any grand gesture ever could because these are the foundations of a long-lasting love relationship.

Chapter 8 - Buck, Eddie and Chris all have their own therapists and during their sessions, they reflect on their pasts while they’re in the present so they can prepare for their future together as a family.

Chapter 9 - Buck and Eddie are there for each other when Buck has to testify as a witness during the trial.  But by the end of it, they’ll both realize their individual and shared traumas are going to keep resurfacing until they talk about them, deal with the fact that they’re in love with one another and face the fact that they can’t live without each other.

Chapter 10 - As Buck and Eddie finally begin to confront their past traumas, they realize how much they need each other to fill in the gaps of their memories.  Additionally, the universe screams at them for what appears to be the one hundredth time so Buck can realize he doesn’t have to ‘find it’ because he already ‘made it’ and Eddie’s reminded tomorrow isn’t promised and he doesn’t have to die alone if he doesn’t want to.

Chapter 11 - A “virga” or dry thunderstorm is in the forecast but once the rain starts, the thunderstorm happening outside won’t be able to match the storm brewing inside between Buck and Eddie.  It’s the universe’s final scream and when the tumultuous winds begin to blow, they’ll have one last chance to hold onto everything they’ve built over the last six years or they’ll lose it all forever.

Chapter 12 - Buck and Eddie have always shared a deep physical attraction and an emotional intimacy that’s unmatched but now that they’re in a relationship, they’re learning how to navigate the romantic intimacy they’ve been waiting for six years to explore. The love they have for each other is a once in a lifetime, soulmate, love of their lives type of love that transcends space and time.

Chapter 13 - While navigating the newness of their romantic relationship, Buck and Eddie take advantage of every moment they spend together. As their individual lives, people from their pasts, time constraints and the possibility of losing each other again make attempts to interrupt and interfere with their journey to forever, they love, care for, support and hold onto each other even tighter to withstand it all.

Chapter 14 - Buck and Eddie can see the lights at the end of the tunnels regarding the results of Buck’s Cancer Screening along with everything else they’re dealing with. But are the lights they see exits to the tunnels or are they headlights on different runaway trains that are speeding towards them in an effort to interrupt their forever?

Chapter 15 - Buck and Eddie have known they were exactly who the other one wanted in a partner since they met six years ago when they agreed to have each other’s backs. They’re in a romantic relationship, they’re both preparing to ask the other one to spend forever with them and by the end of the seventh week into their relationship, together they will plan their most important and greatest adventure for their future.

Chapter 16 - As Buck and Eddie begin to prepare for their marriage ceremony that will take place in Rome, Italy in December 2023, they start planning their first international adventure as a romantic couple. Even though Chris is still the only person they’ve told about their relationship, several people who know them have already witnessed the love they share and as the days continue, others will witness it too.

Chapter 17 - Will be posted soon.

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Read chapters 1-16 are available on AO3.

Continue reading on AO3

Chapter 17 will be posted soon.