#any lathe worth using is going to set you back WELL past $40 even before you get to the rest of the tools and safety equipment you need

[greentrickster]

Had the most amazing experience on Saturday. Was dropping off a couple plush mages to the store that sells them for me downtown, because a couple had sold over the past few weeks and I try to be a good supplier.

It only takes a few minutes and I'd already paid for parking, so I decided to linger and look around the shop a bit, because it's a cool place where there's always a chance something new has arrived if you haven't been there for over a week. It's fantastic. If you told me there was some actual magic in this place I'd believe you, and I've been in the employees-only area.

Which is why I was present, leafing curiously through a book on the making of the movie Chicken Run, to hear a guy behind me loudly proclaim, "Forty dollars for this?! I could make this!" I'm aware that the things in this store can be pricy, but also that a lot of the stock is made by local crafters, like me, meaning prices can be a bit higher due to the fact that you're getting something hand-crafted instead of mass-produced. So I turn around to see what he's complaining about.

And this guy is holding a wooden wand that is unique, one-of-a-kind, hand-crafted from solid wood. All things I know at a glance because, as it happens, I'm not the only person in my family who sells stuff at this store... my dad does as well. And he's the one who made that wand.

Now here's the thing. My dad's part of the local woodturner's group, wood turning being a method of carving that involves spinning a chunk of wood on a high-speed lathe while holding a bit of sharp metal against it until it turns into a wand, bowl, cup, vase, what-have-you. It's a highly-skilled craft that requires a lot of practice and and specialized tools, which he picked up after retiring but before going back to work, and he's been practicing and perfecting the required skills for at least fifteen years. If he likes (and he does like), he can get a wooden sphere carved and polished to such a sheen and smoothness that it both reflects the light and feels like plastic, which is highly impressive on a technical scale and extremely disconcerting on a tactile one.

And this guy just said one of his pieces wasn't worth the price on the tag because 'he could do it too.' Which, as any crafter knows, is not the sort of statement fellow crafters make at volume.

Now, I'm a reasonable sort of trickster. As I said, my dad's part of a woodturning group, I'm well-aware that there genuinely are other people in this area who are as skilled as, if not more skilled than, my dad. Maybe he's just a skilled creep or disagrees with the pricing. So I turn to the guy and go, "Oh? It took my dad a couple years to learn how to make those."

To which he smiles at me and asks if I know what kind of wood the wand is made of.

"Purple Heart."

"Wow, you really know your stuff!"

I stare at him for a moment, because 1) Purple Heart wood is literally the easiest wood to identify on the planet because, as the name suggests, it's actually purple, which is a thing woods generally are not. And also 2) he has apparently not grasped that the reason I know this is because my father made the thing he is holding.

I do not say these things. Instead I clue him in on the situation he's in by saying, "Yes, my dad made that wand."

"Oh. Um. Thank-you!" he holds out his hand.

I look at the hand, then at him. "For what?"

"For your dad!"

...

...I do not shake his hand, and I'm beginning to suspect that this guy does, indeed, not have any clue what he's talking about when he said he could make this himself. But I could be wrong. He could just be socially awkward, I get that. So time for the final question. With a polite smile that no customer yet has been able to tell is completely fake, I ask, "Are you part of the local woodturner's group?"

"The what?"

"The local woodturner's group," I repeat, "My dad turned that wand by hand, on a lathe."

Guy, smiling, about to seal his own fate, "Ah. That is a tool I do not have."

Me, also smiling, because he's just proven beyond all shadow of a doubt that no he could not, in fact, make it himself. "Mm. And that's why it costs forty dollars."

You know, he didn't have anything to say to that?

Put a bit of a spring in my step as I left.