#anon really messed with my head and now i'm paranoid about everything i say

[r1poutmygvtz]

omg i just saw through the dysmorphia for a couple seconds and damn my wrists are tiny and my hands are kinda boney, i wish the dysmorphia would stay away because that motivated me to keep going SO HARD

(the pictures aren't the best but it's all i got :,))

right:

left:

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

EARLY BIRD

Angel Reyes x Reader

Anon asked: could you write an imagine with angel Reyes in which you think he’s gonna break up with you because he’s been distant with you.

Word Count: 1.9k

Thanks to my lovely beta reader @starrynite7114 ​ ✨

Author comments: I'm sorry it took me so long! I just needed some time away from my phone, 'cause I was feeling somewhat sick, but I'm back! I hope you all enjoy. Gif isn't mine, credits to the author.

Tag list: @starrynite7114 ​ @chibsytelford ​ @dazzledamazon ​ @mara-mpou ​ @sammskellington ​ @gemini0410 ​ @1-800-imagines ​ @briana-mishell24 ​@sassymox @whyisgmora @aquamento @sadeyesgf @viviansafizada @samcrobae @jade770 @witchy-wish @rebel-without-cause-x ✨ (if you wanna be tagged, send me a message!)

Another morning, waking up in an empty bed and the next side to yours totally cold. You snort turning your body above it, pulling your hair away from your forehead with a hand. There's any noise outside of the bedroom, the one you were supposed to share with Angel because, probably, he left the house stealthily some hours ago. You don't know what's going on. You don't know what's happening between you. And at any time you have tried to talk with him about it, he only says that everything is okay and you're just a little paranoid. You want to believe him. You really try with all your efforts, but there's a bunch of insecurities getting stuck inside your chest oppressing it, that doesn't let air through.

✉: “hey, early bird”

You haven't thought about it, grabbing your phone to know if he is still alive, leaving it on the pillow where your head is resting. Some minutes laters, when you're almost falling asleep again, the advice dings turning on the screen.

✉: “eh”

That's all. And he keeps saying that nothing has changed. For sure.

✉: “you free 2nig?”

✉: “i think so”

      “y?”

✉: “we could have a night in”

     “dinner and movie”

     “hang out for beers”

✉: “am into first”

✉: “k! 7? 8?”

✉: “8 good”

✉: “k! ily”.

✉: “back”

You know he's not going to come, but at least you try it.

When the night is about to fall down plunging Santo Padre into the darkness of the desert, you begin to set up ready in case a miracle happens. Putting the steaks you bought at pops, in the pan with some oil and salt over low heat, you leave the kitchen to change your clothes. Wearing nothing but his favorite shirt, you spread on your neck and collarbone that fruity and fresh perfume he loves the most. And picking up your hair in a ponytail, you walk barefoot back to the kitchen. It's flooded by the delicious smell of the meat cooking slowly, turning them to the other side when it's getting golden. Leaving the food in the background, you go next to the freezer checking that the cold beers are ready to be drinked. You have popcorn, candies and chocolate for later. Everything is on point, even if you don't have much faith that he's going to come.

You weren't wrong.

At half past nine you're sitting on the couch, eating the cold steak you cooked and drinking the third beer. Angel didn't answer any of your messages, nor your calls. So, after trying to contact him for almost one hour, you decided to have dinner alone.

Another night.

The desire to cry floods you with leaps and bounds, grabbing the last piece from the fork in a bad mood before leaving the dish on the table and drinking your beer till it's empty. You fall asleep on the sofa some minutes after with your eyes filled with tears.

Although the door closes silently, you open your eyes getting up, stretching once you sit up. Angel looks like shit, tired and upset with his hair made a mess. Noticing sideways that the sun is almost shining, you don't say anything when he's about to apologize. Leaving him alone with the word in his mouth. You don't even pick up dinner stuff, going back to bed and throwing away the shirt you're on to wear yours. Covering your head with the blankets, you can hear Angel's heavy steps following to the bathroom to get locked in. The water running down the shower.

A fist hitting the marble.

And finally, a weary snort when the mattress sinks a little next to you.

“I was arrested.”

No words from you. He knows you're awake. Once your eyes are opened, it's impossible for you to fall asleep again.

“I really wanted to spend last night with you, mi amor.”

Nothing.

You don't even move.

“I'm so sorry.”

You try to get up, pulling away the blankets tired of hearing bullshit. Not understanding why he just doesn't tell you it's all over, assuming he doesn't because he hates loneliness and no matter how much he despises you, that you're going to come back once and again like a beaten dog faithful to its master. He never was like that, he just changed from nothing. From being the loveliest man to a ghost in your life. Angel grabs your wrist, stopping you from leaving him alone, but you can't look at his face.

You can't fall again.

“Stay, please.”

“I needed you to stay a lot of times, and you weren't even here.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Yeah, you already said that.”

With a heavy snort being spitted by your lips, you sit on the edge of the bed rubbing your face with both hands. Getting up and holding your phone in a hand, you guide your feet to the door looking for some coffee in the kitchen, to serve it inside a big mug.

“Emily is back and I am just trying to save EZ's ass. I didn't see I was abandoning you.”

Sounds like an explanation, but you don't really care. This hole between you two isn't going to get closed with some apologies and some kisses. He's going to have to make it up to you.

Hard.

“And when I’m saying I’m sorry, it's because I'm really sorry (Y/N).” He takes three steps closer towards you, with his hands keeping down inside the pockets of his short sweatpants. “I fucking love you. Nothing and nobody could change that. I swear on my mom.”

You have a sip of your coffee, closing your eyes when he names his mother for the first time in that way.

“Listen, I got to be back at the scrapyard in four hours. But this afternoon we're gonna go to a place.”

“Which place?”

“You'll see. And I know you're gonna like it.”

“But?”

There's always a ‘but’.

“But first I have to pick up a buddy, I promise him that he could stay with us”.

“What the fuck, Angel?!”

You're drowning in coughs, leaving the cup to hit your chest with a palm.

“(Y/N), trust me, okay? You will love him.”

“You're a fucking jerk.”

“Mi amor, listen.” He grabs your forearm, stopping you. “Trust me”.

“I can't fucking trust you. Not today. Not after telling me you were fucking arrested, and now telling me you're gonna bring a ‘buddy’ to our fucking house without asking me.”

“You're gonna regret those words this afternoon.”

“Yeah, but for that, you have to be here and you're not gonna come.”

Letting go yourself, you walk away from him. You can't believe this is truly happening, getting worse as the minutes go by.

Driving through the desert, you don't know where the hell you're going, hoping he's not bringing you to Vicki's place because one of the girls needs to hide. Even if he talked to you about a guy. Angel is giving you the directions you have to take, making your blood boil whenever you ask him about it and he just smirks at you with that kind of smile you would like to punch out.

And yes, it's a surprise when you reach Grace's kennel. Frowning at him as you stop your car, you try to keep calm.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Am I a fucking joke to you, Angel?”

“What?”

“I'm not gonna fucking bring a junkie to my house!”

“We're n— We're not he—”. He can't even talk, breaking into laughs stirring on his seat. “Step out of the car, mi amor.”

“No! You know what? We're fucking done! I can't! I can't handle it!”

You're getting so nervous you don't know what you are saying. Collapsing. Exploding. But seems like the oldest Reyes doesn't give a fuck if you are on the verge of an anxiety attack, when he takes off your seat belt before grabbing the keys of your car. Angel doesn't say anything, getting out of it and walking to your side. After opening your door, he holds your hand pushing you into him. And you just let him do what he wants with you.

“You ok?” Grace asks you somewhat confused and worried, looking at your pale face. Pursing your lips, you shrug your shoulders.

Seems like you're in shock, not understanding anything that is going on around you while your boyfriend guides your steps to the backyard of the kennel. You find a big black dog lying on the ground with a plastic cone covering his head from his neck and some bandages on his paws and his tail. Tail that he begins to move full of happiness walking with some difficulties close to Angel.

“See, buddy?! I told ya I was coming back for ya'!” Your boyfriend squats towards the dog to hug him, whilst the animal is crying a little, stirring and trying to lick his face.

“What? What's that?” You point at the dog with a finger.

“I was driving on my way back home, and I saw a fuckig shithead dragging him by the paws with a bike. I was arrested because he ended up unconscious”.

Pursing your lips, you can't help but cry slightly bending over the floor and stretching a hand on air, just wanting that he can smell you to see you don't want to hurt him. The dog brings his snout closer, sniffing your fingers for some seconds taking two steps next to you. His tail starts to move again, imagine that he's also smelling Angel's scent on your clothes.

“Hey, buddy. Nice to meet you”. Using a soft and low tone, the dog shortens the distance licking your face without expecting. That makes you laugh loudly.

“I know you feel alone when I’m riding and he doesn't have a home.” Angel says, waiting for you to finish spinning the matter by yourself. “See? I knew you were gonna regret your words.”

“Ugh, shut up.” You growl, drawing a smile to your new friend with his head rested on your chest, as you caress one of his sides.

“Is he okay?” Your boyfriend asks Grace, getting up as he does, being followed by the dog.

The women nods.

“He's strong. But I'll give you some pills for pain, in case he complains. And you should change the bandages every day. Bring him back next week and I'll check him.”

“Done. How much do I own you, sweetheart?”

“Nothing. Just take him to his new home.”

“Thank you, Grace.” You say before hugging her tightly.

“Call me if you need anything, okay?” She said then, nodding at her.

“So, what's his name?” You ask Angel, walking back to the car with the dog practically glued to your legs.

“Caco”. He answers holding your hand, leaving a kiss on the back of it.

“So, I'm assuming the place where we’re going next is a pet shop, to buy him a lot of things.”

“Shit, mi amor, I got fucking horny every time you show me how smart you are.”

[aminiatureworld]

heyya, it's me again, hope you're having a wonderful day so far 💕

so i've just finished reading every chapter of the 'in my dreams' and i wanna comment how you did such good job with writing it! esp when its the flashblack / dream sequences also mainly i'm a history nerd and seeing stuff based on historical places makes me happy :D

and i also liked how you touched the emotional aspect of it. Seeing how the characters react to the anguish and pain the reader is experiencing is very comforting and it totally was not because i was projecting ahaha nope

but seriously, you did a great job. i hope you're feeling better now since you mentioned in a previous post that you were feeling a bit burnt out. if you ever reached that point, please do not hesitate to rest and take a break from writing! pushing yourself to do something you don't want to do will really take the fun out of it,,, plus i'm sure everyone here will be patiently waiting for you :D

anws i have another idea that popped itself in my head since i've watched too many horror films this week ;; i can't stomach gore horror like the saw movies or final destination, but i can however handle paranormal horror! it still freaks me out though

also this is partially a zhongli brainrot so i hope that you enjoy! if not pls feel free to delete

okay so, reader is an outcast from their village. they had no family, relatives, or even friends! it wasn't because they had done something inhumane, or horrific. heck, they aren't even a bad person! but, there is something deeply unsettling about them.

you see, whenever people look at them, they get the sense of uneasiness, something that they can't figure out and the longer they look, the more they become fearful and paranoid of their surroundings. they want to look away, but an unseen force practically forces them in a trance, which becomes more unbearable with each passing second.

reader is mainly aware of the dilemma they bring to everyone, so it causes them to become a hermit, practically living in isolation at the edge of the forest. at least in that way, no one has to be affected by their curse, right? right?

living in isolation was harder than they thought and they were going insane. at least back in the village, they had pets that kept them company but now? the complete silence was unbearable.

so, whether they cause a commotion or not, reader decides to travel to different cities in Teyvat, enjoying the different cultures and sceneries as one could. they do end up causing trouble from the local governments who thought they were a threat to the point that they were thrown to jail a few times, but other than that it ends up... fine? It was a miracle no archon tried to kill them!

On their journey to Liyue, reader was a bit lost when they end up bumping into someone. They profusely apologized, saying that they were being careless and it was rude of them. However, the gentleman simply acknowledges his mistake, and goes on to introduce himself when..

reader feels a chill crawl up their spine once they had eye contact. for a moment, it felt like the earth was pulling them down, slowly swallowing them whole and it was the most terrifying thing they had ever felt.

it was over in a blink of an eye and reader took a few steps back, unnerved by the entire situation.

"Do I know you?

"I'm no one of importance. I'm simply a consultant for the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. And who might you be?"

"No one of importance too, I suppose."

They exchanged directions and quickly parted ways, yet reader cannot shake the feeling that they're being watched. By whom? No one can say for certain. But, let's hope Liyue's adepti and its ex-archon won't do anything rash. For the meantime, reader enjoys their life as a traveler.

The end! It's abit long so apologies ;;

- 🍪

Hello anon! 

I’m doing well enough, I hope that the same is true for you!

I glad you enjoyed reading “In My Dreams”. I’m always happy to hear from a fellow history nerd, it’s very gratifying to hear that you enjoyed the dreams and flashbacks especially, I found those were sort of the hardest scenes since I usually got way too sucked into the history part of it. 

And projecting or not, that the emotional beats were satisfying is also something I’m glad to hear, especially since I was so focused on lore and trying to mess with that. I was afraid sometimes I left more personal feelings and connections in the lurch. Also if it was a comfort at all then I’m very glad to hear it. Sometimes fiction can be the best place to find a sort of understanding ear, and I’ve definitely read fics that I feel can accurately mirror certain feelings and emotions. 

Thank you for caring about my wellbeing. Thankfully I was only burning out a little bit, I think I just set a schedule that was a little too ambitious, or rather ambitious considering I always end up writing late into the night instead of during the day like an intelligent person might. Still, thank you for worrying. I promise if it ever gets very bad I will take a break, and I’m glad to hear that you would be willing to wait for me to come back.

And I also don’t particularly like horror films in the slasher genre! I find they tend to have worse writing, but it could just be that I find jumpscares really irritating. I mostly stick to anime horror and then thrillers like Silence of the Lambs, which I really think is more thriller than horror. I do agree though I think whether film or books psychological horror and paranormal horror is usually more enjoyable to consume. 

And oh I think that’s a very interesting premise! And don’t worry it’s not long at all. It could go so many different directions. Is the reader cursed with it or is it inherited? If it’s a curse then could it be a spirit or being that Zhongli has dealt with before? If not did Zhongli make some sort of contact with the reader’s ancestors? It would also be interesting to see how Zhongli might react later on. He tends to be passive enough unless there is a genuine threat to Liyue, and it would be interesting to explore what he bases the idea of something being threatening on, whether he waits for something to happen or makes an assumption, and how that might change as he interacts with the reader. 

One thing the premise also touches on is the strength of horror, that being ambiguity. Horror that works best leaves a lot to the imagination. Thus the idea of the reader being watched but us never getting an answer to what happens to them is - at least to me - very compelling. I really think that letting the mind run wild is sometimes much better than spelling everything out for them. Explain something too much and it’s no longer scary. Something that’s governed by specific rules is never as terrifying as something that just exists or happens or appears without explaination.

Thank you for your lovely ask and for letting me ramble a bit about horror. Your premise was as interesting as always and I hope you have a lovely week and that you write again!