#andiv3rs dad

[andiv3r]

My dad and I are watching Good Omens right now and like. Oh my god. He is behaving like a fucking child. As am I. We are both quoting every fucking line. He quotes Crowley and I quote Aziraphale. This is absurd.

[andiv3r]

I just showed this to my dad and he looked up with the most serious expression on his face and he said "That is absolutely correct, in every detail."

The reason why women go into the bathroom in groups is to avoid the toilet goblin, which does not attack you if you're moving in herds. Men do not do this, and the reason men take so long in the bathroom is because they have to fight the toilet goblin either to get in or to get out of the bathrooms every single time. To my knowledge, nonbinary people are entirely unaware of the existence of the toilet goblin.

[queer-reader-07]

thanks @ineffabildaddy and @crowleyslvt for the tags!!

last song: Ten Times More by Dropkick Murphys (the This Machine Kills Fascists Album has been on repeat for me for the past week or so lol)

favorite color: purple 💜

sweet, savory, or spicy: sweet!

relationship status: single, not actively ready to mingle but hopefully in the future

last TV show or movie: the last movie was Bottoms which i watched with my friends (much to the disappointment of my dad who had apparently been hoping to watch it with me)

currently watching: working my way through Doctor Who (i'm on the 12th doctor) and also ofc losing my mind over Percy Jackson

last thing i looked up: christina aguilera

literally zero pressure tags <3: @ineffablake @myhyperfixationmademedoit @procrastiel @takeme-totheworld @katspause @andiv3r @something-something-goodomens

[agoodpairofsocks]

weirdest thing you've ever done/seen someone do, GO

A couple years back, I, about 11, was in the parking lot of a gas station, waiting for my mother to come out of the store, when a father and two kids walked up to the store. The older child and the dad walk inside, but the younger child lingers outside the door- seemingly going unnoticed by the father. And this kid maybe 5 or 6 just starts itching his ass I stare in bewilderment as, in broad daylight, this child just stands upon the blessed threshold of the 7-11, vigorously itching his ass Im terrified A minute straight of him itching his ass he decides to just reach on down into them because why not? He's on the outside of the store, hands down his pants, itching his asshole with no shame or humanity with no witnesses but God and myself and I watch in horror as he reaches up sniffs his hand and opens the door.

Edit: Forgot to tag people to tell me about their weird stuff @bagelofchaos-thesequel @starry-cow @andiv3r uhhh shit i never know who to tag fuck @im-the-son-of-rage-and-lov3 @something-something-goodomens @ofdaisy @flyingmodelr0ckets

[andiv3r]

My dad and I were discussing my name change today, because why not, and it's so funny to me that he brings up his own hatred of his name and goes "but see, i made my name mean me, you could have made [deadname] mean you. You could have made it not a girl name."

And I'm like. "Yeah, I could have. There are trans people who do that, and ykw? Awesome. Great for them. They chose to keep the name they always had and make it mean who they are. But like. I didn't wanna do that." And he just kept trying to come up with reasons why it was cooler or more unique to keep a name that doesn't match your gender, and I eventually countered with "yeah but I made up a name that sounds way cooler than the one you gave me" and he shrugged and said "yeah can't argue there".

[andiv3r]

Writing with my dad is going Great.

[andiv3r]

So, my dad (who has written a novel and started writing many novels) and I (who... uh... well I've started writing a whole lot of stories but... well, you get the picture) decided to collaborate and write a story together yesterday, and uh.

I know for a fact nobody would be able to guess which ones he typed and which ones I typed because his are the ones that sound like a three year old, and mine are the ones that sound like a slightly more mature person. Maybe ten or eleven. So yeah. This is what you get when you put two writers with ADHD in a word document together.

Also, in case you're wondering why it looks like you're only seeing one half of a conversation, that's because you are. Whoever sits at the keyboard is the typist, and he is not allowed to speak. Should he speak, he will be BANISHED TO THE BOTTOMLESS PIT FOR ALL OF ETERNI- no, no, that's not right... oh, right, we swap seats and he doesn't get to be the typist anymore. Because of that, anything the typist says gets jotted down in our notes, and we're not allowed to delete.

Just as a treat I want to attribute ONE statement to each of us, so:

GAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY -my father

FFFFFFFUUUUUCCCCKKKK YYHOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuu 😊

-me

[andiv3r]

Me: Hell yeah I have mental stability!!

My dad: I have to go away for work for two weeks

Me: fuck

[alixfoxx]

Picrew is illegal guys just like tiktok

@andiv3r @cats-officially @thee0ne-with-rabies @official-gimmick-dad @meatybunger

Found this on Twitter, so I thought, why not posting it here and doing a tag game 😊

Ok, I’ll go first

If he is the reason, I’d go to prison gladly 🥰❤️‍🔥

Tagging: @killerqueen-ofwillowgreen @nic-214 @milkyway-ashes @dr-radiation @whitequeen-ofwillowgreen @sunsetdaydreamer @therockywhorerpictureshow @delicatelyfantasticninja and everyone 😊

Sorry if I forgot to tag some of you!

[andiv3r]

I'm actually gonna cry. My dad has just told me he might be moving to fucking UTAH which is horrifying. He'll be making $200k per year but. He won't be living right next to me anymore. I don't know how to handle that, emotionally.

[andiv3r]

My dad and I just had an interaction. It went like this:

Dad: *super fucking loud sneeze*

Me: Bless you... and the demon that just exited your mouth.

Dad: But... we don't want to bless the demon, do we? It needs no blessings.

Me: Well, I mean, wouldn't that, like... set it on fire or something?

Dad: Oh. Yeah, I guess it would. Hah. Bless you, motherfucker!! *directed at the air next to him*

[andiv3r]

My dad said he might make a Tumblr account, and very promptly said "but you might have to claim I'm not your dad" and I agreed. Yeah. Sorry. You all see how much I love him from my posts but I would not claim him if he got an account.

[queer-reader-07]

thanks for that tag <33

favorite color: purple

last song: Nina Cried Power by Hozier ft. Mavis Staples

last film: i think it was The Marvels? went and saw it with my dad

currently watching: still working my way through Doctor Who, started a soft rewatch of Sandman, about to be feral about the Percy Jackson show in a couple days

currently reading: Okay, Cupid by Mason Deaver is my current physical read (got an early copy of it!) & Freedom is A Constant Struggle by Angela Y Davis is my current audio read

currently working on: passing calculus lmao (it's not actually that bad i'm just dramatic). creatively though, i'm working on a thing about platonic love between the doctor & donna for my substack and also workshopping a different substack post about opera.

no pressure tags: @ineffablefood @andiv3r @bowtiepastabitch @cryptic-queer-cryptid @createserenity @myhyperfixationmademedoit

Thank you for the tag @floralomens!

Favorite Color: turquoise

Last Song: longest night - howie day

Last Movie: end of the world

Currently Watching: not a thing i’m too busy but i did rewatch good omens this week and will be doing the same with a friend who hasn’t yet seen it tomorrow

Currently Reading: good omens fan fiction

Currently Working On: chapter two of my good omens fanfic

Currently Obsessed With: good omens

No pressure tags: @ineffabildaddy @sad-chaos-goblin @apocalypticginger-blog

[andiv3r]

The last few days have been like

Me: hey dad wanna watch Staged??

Dad: yeah but I'm tutoring a kid right now

Then later,

Dad: hey, wanna watch Staged?

Me: *has just gotten into a creative flow with my writing and can't stop otherwise I'll lose all my ideas* AGHHHHH!!!!

Dad: ah okay

So anyways, woke up this morning and,

Me: so. Y'wanna watch Staged now?

Dad: nOo, I've only been saying I wanted to watch it for the pAST THREE DAYS NOW!

[andiv3r]

If anyone ever again asks about my transition goals I'm just going to google "young Michael Sheen" and hand over my phone.

[andiv3r]

Going 2 see if i can stay home today because my sickness has gotten progressively worse