#and the first painting took 2-4 hours I don't recall
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I really do love putting my own twists on master studies (the middle one just referenced off a photo though).
Featuring three characters from my 33 chapter story on Toyhouse: La Doña [she/her], Alfonz [he/they], and L'Oide [he/they]. Of the characters painted above, L'Oide only appears once.
References: [X] | [X] | [X]
#art by capseisen#digital art#master study#my works#painting#artists on tumblr#original character#image description in alt#La Doña [she/her]#Young!Alfonz#Alfonz [he/they]#L'Oide [he/they]#Young!La Doña#the photo reference painting took 2 hours#the last painting took 2 and a half#and the first painting took 2-4 hours I don't recall#I could name drop the story but I'm anxious about doing so#It's definitely very spicy lol#But I'm attached to all these characters#So thoughts about an ask blog are persistent...#I've been arting a lot btw just not uploading here#still using Toyhouse as my personal gallery lol
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Keeping the Faith part 6
title from billy joel's 'keeping the faith'
also posted on ao3
part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
“Has anyone seen Remus today?” Sirius asked, looking around the table in their English class.
When his boyfriend hadn’t been at his locker that morning, Sirius had just assumed Remus had already gone to class, but when he hadn’t come into third hour, Sirius had gotten worried. His only solace had been a simple i miss you too text he’d woken up to that had been timemarked at 4:30 in the morning. It hadn’t done much to ease his worries.
His concerns were reflected in James’ face. “I haven’t, but I don’t have first or second hour with him.” He turned to Marlene. “Was he in gym?”
She shook her head. “Haven’t seen him.”
“Maybe he’s sick?” Lily offered.
Sirius shook his head. “Remus doesn’t miss when he’s sick.” No matter how much he should.
Lily and Marlene shrugged, but Sirius caught James’ worried eyes. They nodded at each other. There would be a trip to Remus’ house after school today.
“Good morning, class,” McGonagall began. “As you all know, tomorrow and Wednesday will be presentation days, so today, we will have a work day. If you have any last minute questions, be sure to ask me.” She clapped her hands together. “Now, you may get together with your partners for your finishing touches.”
Marlene was already halfway to Dorcas before McGonagall even finished her sentence, but Sirius was surprised to see Dorcas coming their way, and she didn’t look happy.
"I need to talk to you,” she said to him.
Immediately, Sirius felt nerves tingle up his spine. There was only one thing the two of them had in common, and that thing was Regulus. "What happened? Is Regulus okay?" He couldn't stop the quaver at his brother's name.
Fortunately, Dorcas knew to keep her voice down. "He's fine," she said, but the frown remained on her face.
"What is it?" Apparently, it was possible to be even more worried than he already was.
"He said to tell you that he changed his mind," she said carefully. Clearly, Dorcas didn't approve of this decision.
Sirius' face dropped into a deep frown. "Tell him that's not acceptable." He stopped for a second. "Actually, don't tell him anything. I'll talk to him in his last class." Since Sirius had office aid as his last hour, he had the power to call Regulus out of class. (He didn't, actually, but he did have access to the intercom, and it was only not allowed if he got caught, right?)
Dorcas put her hands up, but a short look of relief crossed her face. "I don't care what you do, as long as his mind changes back." With that, she returned to her table. Next to James, Sirius saw a look of confusion scrunching in Lily’s eyebrows, but she thankfully kept her eyes on her laptop, evidently working on their presentation.
He turned to James, a question in his eyes. James just nodded. “I’ll check on Remus and come back to get you.”
“Thank you,” Sirius breathed, though it didn’t make him any less worried.
-
As James pulled the Pig up to Remus' double-wide, he carefully took in the trailer park where his friend had grown up. Really, it wasn't even a park, just a small gravel road that snaked around the far end of Cabeswater. There were about 20 trailers in all, and James knew that Snape lived in one of them, though he wasn't sure which. The sixth from the main road was rather dark, even compared to the other trailers, painted drab gray with heavy curtains shielding the inside from view. Beer cans and cigarette butts dotted the tiny front porch and driveway.
That one, James recalled, housed Fenrir Greyback, one of his least favorite people in the universe no matter how much Remus insisted the man had "helped" him. James knew exactly what a man like Greyback's help was worth.
The house next to Greyback's was only slightly less depressing. This one was painted faded white, and the green curtains in the windows matched the front door, both of which Remus' mother had picked out before she died.
He parked in front of the white one and quickly ran up the steps.
Before he could even knock, there came a yell from inside. "Go away, James!"
He scoffed. Like that was gonna happen. "I'm not leaving til you tell me why you weren't at school." He rapped the door for good measure.
"I'm sick," was Remus' response.
James rolled his eyes. "We both know that's not true."
"How do you know? You haven't seen me all day."
James groaned in frustration. "Open the damn door, Remus!"
"Fine, Jesus." There was movement from inside. "I'm only doing this because I know you'll stay there all night if I don’t."
Finally, the door swung open, and James failed to hold in his gasp.
There were two large bruises covering Remus' eyes giving him a distinct raccoon look, and his nose was red and swollen.
"Who the hell did this to you?" James exclaimed.
"Shhh!" Remus' darted around, as if checking to make sure no one was listening in. He lowered his voice. "You've seen me. Now you can go."
"What? No, I-"
"James, there's nothing you can do. You should know that by now." He went to close the door, but James put a hand out.
"What are you gonna do tomorrow? That won't heal for at least a week," he said, knowing the only way to get through to Remus would be through school.
He shrugged. "I'll figure something out."
James blew out a breathe threw his nose. "Why don't you just turn him in?" he asked, even though he knew it was useless.
Remus gave him a look, but James was loath to give up now. "You're still a minor! If you cut a deal, you probably won't even-"
Remus slammed the door in his face. "Kay," he said awkwardly. "Good talk." He knocked on the door. "Are you gonna open the door?"
When there was no answer, he knocked again. "Remus!"
This time, James saw the lights go out inside the trailer, and he decided that was all he was gonna get out of his friend. He also noticed some of Remus' neighbors peeking out of their windows at the Pig which would not be good for anyone involved.
Sighing, he hopped back in the orange Camaro and pulled away, all the while cursing Remus' stubbornness.
At the very least, he could tell Sirius that Remus hadn’t died yet.
-
"Regulus Black, please report to the front office. Regulus Black, you are needed at the front office."
The teenager in question stilled as the intercom crackled itself back to silence.
If there was one thing Regulus did not want to do, it was go to the front office.
Unfortunately, Mr. Slughorn had other ideas. "Mr. Black, I believe that call was for you."
There were a few snickers from his classmates, but at least Evan gave him a worried look as he made his way to the door.
Regulus and Evan both knew exactly what that call was about.
"Try to be fast, we have important things to do today," Slughorn called, despite it being only ten minutes from the final bell.
Nevertheless, Regulus nodded. He would be back as soon as humanly possible. Maybe even before that.
It only took him a couple minutes to reach the front office, even with taking the long way, and in what felt like no time at all, he was forcing himself to take a deep breath before stepping inside.
From where he was standing, he could see the big blue desk dividing the room in two. There were also a couple of kids sitting in those stupid office chairs, waiting their turn to be called back, presumably to talk to Dumbledore. There also seemed to be a parent arguing with the desk worker.
The desk worker that happened to be his estranged older brother.
The second he stepped inside, Sirius' eyes snapped to Regulus' matching gray ones, and his face lit up. He quickly covered it up with a disinterested, "I'll be with you in a minute," and if Regulus hadn't received the same lessons in emotion control, he might have been fooled.
He settled down in a chair, thinking he should have brought a book. It was really a pain in the ass sometimes to not have a phone to take places.
Instead, he listened in on the conversation between Sirius and the woman arguing with him.
"There has to be something you can do," she was saying, the sunglasses sitting on her dyed blonde head throwing a glare around the office.
Sirius didn't miss a beat. "As I said before, there's nothing I can do. The best option is to tell your son to turn in his-" Sirius glanced at what Regulus assumed was a computer monitor behind the desk "-wow, 37 missing assignments. That's gotta be a record." Regulus felt his eyes widen. He’d never even had one missing assignment, let alone thirty-seven. They had to be talking about a freshman.
The woman's face grew red with fury. "Excuse me?"
Sirius cracked a grin. "I'm just saying, maybe instead of yelling at me, you should be supporting him on his journey to secondary education." The last bit was said with a deadpan deliverance, as if he was reciting a line. If he had only repeated their mother like that, both their lives would have been much easier. "Or, if that's too much for you, we offer a wide variety of tutoring services, free, paid, in person, and online." He placed a pamphlet on the desk, but the woman didn't take it.
"My son doesn't need tutoring,” she said as if personally offended.
"Well, he needs something, and clearly, we don't offer it," Sirius responded. He turned his attention to the two kids in the chairs next to Regulus. "I'm guessing you two are here for fighting?"
Regulus realized with a start that when he passed, he had failed to notice that one of the kids had a black eye and the other a split lip.
He chided himself. He shouldn’t have gotten so distracted thinking about talking to Sirius again. It had only been a year and a half; he shouldn’t be so anxious. It wasn’t like a year and a half was 9 percent of his entire life or anything, or that the last time they had spoken was right before their parents had nearly killed the older of the two, and Regulus had been forced to listen.
He was fine.
"Okay, tell me your names and what happened," Sirius said as he searched for something in the desk. The angry woman skulked out the door.
Distantly, Regulus wondered where the person who was actually paid to work in the front office was. There was no way having a 17 year old kid working the desk by himself was allowed.
The two kids gave their names and started talking over each other in an effort to explain themselves out of punishment.
"She came at me out nowhere-"
"He broke up with me because I told him he's clingy-"
"She cheated on me with Mark-"
"-thought what we had was special-
"-so I told her off and she punched me-"
Sirius clapped loudly, and they shut up. Thank god. "One at a time." He pointed. "Her first." He then did something with the computer.
The girl sat up straighter, dyed red hair tumbling over her shoulders. She couldn't have been older than 14. "He broke up with me yesterday over Snapchat because I told him he was too clingy, and then he just started yelling at me in eighth hour as if it was my fault. Then he attacked me!" She huffed, and Regulus couldn't help but chuckle.
She glared at him. "What's your problem?"
Sirius snickered. "Yeah, Regulus, what's your problem?"
Regulus flushed red with embarrassment, but before he could say anything, the boy with the black eye broke in, eyebrows raised. "Your name is Regulus?”
Regulus’ face flushed, and he pointed at his brother. "His name is Sirius!"
Both the kids drew back. "No offense, but your parents suck." Regulus was too busy being offended to notice which one said that.
"You have no idea," Sirius said. There was a noise behind the desk that sounded like a printer, and Sirius placed two pieces of paper down onto the desk. "Sign these."
"But I didn't get to tell you my side!" the boy said indignantly.
"Yeah, about that," Sirius started. "It doesn't actually matter what happened. As long as both of you hit each other, you'll each be suspended for a week with a month of detention."
"But he started it!" the girl said at the same time the boy said, "But she started it!"
But Sirius had already turned his attention back to the computer. "Doesn't matter, sign it." The two glanced at each other but got up to sign the papers. Sirius nodded. "Good. Both of your parents have been called. They'll be here to get you in a few minutes."
"But I ride with-"
"Don't care." Sirius pulled out another piece of paper and moved to the other side of the desk. "All of you be quiet, I have to do announcements."
There was a beep and a crackle, and then Sirius was saying into what Regulus assumed was the intercom, "Good afternoon, Henrietta. Please be aware of the giant pothole outside the parking lot. Also, varsity football has an away game at Durmstrang this Friday. Finally, if you're James Potter, I'm gonna be late leaving today, so plan accordingly. And just like that, we're one day closer to Christmas break." He lifted his finger from the intercom button, and it crackled again. He looked up.
"Regulus, your turn. Why haven't you been answering my texts?"
Regulus' mind went blank trying to process the whiplash it had just gone through. "Huh?" was all he managed.
"Why haven't you been answering my texts?" Sirius repeated, slower this time.
The boy sent him a look of sympathy. "Good luck, dude."
Regulus shook his head, trying to clear the fog. "I haven't been ignoring them, just-" he gestured vaguely.
"Avoiding them?" Sirius offered.
Regulus nodded.
Sirius tucked a stray hair behind his ear. "You need to make a decision. Either you stay, or you go."
Regulus looked down. "It's not that simple, Sirius."
"Why not?"
"I-"
"Wait, wait, time out," the girl said, making a T with her hands. "What's going on?"
Before Regulus could tell her to fuck off, Sirius said, “That’s not your business.”
The girl’s face scrunched up. “We told you our business, but whatever.”
Regulus and Sirius looked at each other, and after a moment of silent conversation, Sirius said, "I want him to move in with me, but he's afraid to leave our parents' house."
The girl made a confused noise. "Aren't you teenagers?"
They all jumped as the bell rang suddenly, and the sound of students rushing for the exit soon filled the building.
"I have to go," Regulus said, moving to stand up.
"Please, I know you sit in the library til 4 everyday with Evan and Dorcas," Sirius said.
Regulus made a face.
"To answer your question, Sara, yes we are teenagers, but our parents suck," Sirius explained. "Which is why I left and why I want him to move in with me."
Sara made a noise of understanding. "But he's afraid of leaving the only home he's ever known."
Regulus shifted in his seat, distinctly uncomfortable at having his feelings bared to people he didn't even know.
The boy said, "I get that. I mean, we're horrible for each other, but we keep getting back together." He grinned at Sara.
Sirius nodded. "Yes, Chris, exactly."
It occurred to Regulus just then that he had left his stuff in Slughorn's classroom. He hoped Evan grabbed it for him.
"So, what you need to do is show him that living with you can still be like living at home," Sara said.
And that was actually perfectly reasonable, except - "Living with me will never be like living at home," Sirius said, face stony.
Sara's eyes grew wide, and she and Chris exchanged a glance. "Oookay." She thought for a moment. "What if he does it in stages? Maybe start moving things over gradually, then spend some time with him and some time at home?" She was looking at Regulus now, as were Sirius and the boy.
He took a second to form an answer. "That wouldn't work. If I move, it needs to be between today and Saturday." A detail he had been ignoring.
Sirius cocked his head. "Why?"
Regulus glanced at Sara and Chris, debating what he wanted to share with them. He looked back at his brother. "You remember the thing they wanted you to do right before you left?"
Sirius' face grew pale. "They want you to do that on Saturday?" he asked, far too calmly.
Regulus nodded.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Sirius asked, straightening. "Reg, that's not good."
"You don't think I know that?" He sighed. "I don't know what to do, Siri."
His brother's mouth ticked upward at the old nickname, but he quickly turned serious. "Okay, how about this?"
30 minutes later, they had come up with a pretty decent plan with the help of Sara and Chris who had both been picked up by their parents at some point.
Regulus would leave his school stuff in his locker that night and go home and shove as much stuff as he could in his backpack. Then, tomorrow, he would just go home with Sirius, who assured him that the Potters were working on the legal aspects of his escape and had been since he texted Sirius all those nights ago.
By the time they were done, it was past 3, and Sirius looked up abruptly.
"Hey, James," he greeted.
Hey, James, indeed. The youngest Potter had just walked in, presumably to pick up his brother.
When he saw Regulus, he waved. "Hi, Baby Black."
Regulus made a face. "Don't call me that."
James gave him a thumbs up.
Regulus frowned. From day one, he had harbored a deep jealousy toward the Potter boy. The day Sirius started preschool, it was all James this and James that and James is so cool, can I go to James’ house? Unfortunately, 4 year old Sirius had been right. James was so cool. With his perfect grades, perfect family, perfect dimples, it was no wonder his brother had been caught so quickly in James' orbit.
But not Regulus, no way. Regulus decided right off the bat to hate the Potter boy, ever since he had stolen his brother's attention, and since then, his feelings had only sharpened.
So whenever he told James not to call him "Baby Black," what he was really saying was, "Fuck you."
He caught Sirius giving him a look he couldn't quite figure out, and he realized he was making a face at James' back. He quickly looked down.
“You ready to go?” James asked.
Regulus looked at him, confused, until he realized the taller boy was addressing Sirius, not him.
“Yeah, we can go,” Sirius responded. He glanced at Regulus. “You good, or do you need me to stay longer?”
Regulus shook his head. “Go, I need to get to the library.”
“Kay.” He walked around the desk, backpack in hand, and left with James, but not before waving. “See you.”
-
Remus stared into the bathroom mirror and gently prodded the black skin around his eyes, wincing when it stung.
The deep bruises from his fight with Crabbe on Sunday weren't showing any signs of fading. On the contrary, they seemed to be getting darker.
Maybe James had been right, and there was no way he'd be able to go to school today.
No. That wasn't an option. He'd just have to figure something out.
Remus drummed his fingers on the edge of the sink, thinking. He just needed to cover up the bruising.
That was immediately a problem. There was nothing in his house he could think of that wouldn't be noticeable on his face. It wasn't like he or his dad had any make up lying around.
It was quickly becoming apparent that if he wanted to go to school today, he would have to show his face to at least one of his friends.
Unfortunately, the only person he was okay with seeing him like this was James, but Remus didn't think he had any make up, and he certainly didn't have the skills Remus needed.
The girls were out. Lily would absolutely lose it if she saw him like this, and Marlene might not even be at home. Since she and Dorcas had revealed their relationship, they had been sleeping over at each other's houses most nights.
Peter wasn't even an option. Remus doubted he even knew what foundation was.
That left Sirius, which wasn't actually a terrible idea. Remus knew he often used make up and as an artist was very skilled with it. They'd also been very clear with each other from the beginning of their relationship that they were both entitled to their secrets, and the other wouldn't ask.
Reluctantly, he pulled out his phone.
Remus: can i stop at monmouth before school
It was barely a minute before Remus received a text back.
Sirius: obviously
Remus: omw
He grabbed his bookbag and keys and set out on the 20 minute walk to Monmouth. If anyone asked, he took the fastest path without stalling at all.
When he got there, the front door was unlocked, and he hoped that was because they'd just opened it for him and not because they forgot to lock it, though honestly either option was likely.
He quickly bounded up the stairs to Sirius' room above, barely slowing to return James' knowing frown and cheerful, "Good morning!"
"Sirius?" he called once he reached his boyfriend’s room.
"In here!" Sirius said.
Remus crossed the room to the bathroom. "Hey, love." He held his breath and waited for Sirius to look at him.
"Hey, Re. I'm almost done." From what Remus could tell, he was doing something with his hair, though what, Remus had no idea. “Oh! I have something to tell you about Regulus.”
“What’s that?”
Sirius smiled widely into the mirror. “He’s coming home with us today!”
“That’s great!” Finally, some good fucking news. Sirius had been trying to get Regulus to leave Grimmauld Place for years, though Remus thought the reasoning for his sudden change of mind couldn’t be good.
“Yeah, our parents decided they were going to force him to take the Dark Mark on Saturday, so he’s leaving.” Well, bad incident with a good outcome. Those were always good.
“Do you want me to come over?” Remus asked. He hoped not; he had work, and he was not in the mood for socializing.
Thankfully, Sirius shook his head. “No, I don’t want to overwhelm him. Thank you for offering, though.”
“Of course.”
They stood there in silence for another few minutes until Sirius finally turned away from the mirror. When he caught sight of his boyfriend, he gasped, and his eyes widened. "What the fuck, Re?"
Remus waved him away. "Can you cover it up?"
Sirius blinked. "I-um," he started. "Yeah, I can. What happened?"
"Doesn't matter," Remus said. "Cover it? Please?"
Sirius shook his head. "Yeah, of course. Let me just-" He went and grabbed a bag of what Remus hoped was make-up out of his nightstand. Once back in the bathroom, he pulled out a little tube labeled "concealer."
"Hold still." He clutched Remus' chin in his hand, and he tried not to feel guilty. “I can’t believe you had this-” he pointed at Remus’ face “-going on, and you let me stand there and talk about Regulus.”
Remus frowned lightly. “You were doing something, and the Regulus thing was important.”
“So is you looking like a raccoon!” he said, as if the punch was the worst thing that happened to him on Sunday.
“Sorry.”
Sirius shook his head. “You don’t have to apologize for that.”
“Sorry.”
“Remus.”
“Yeah, sorry.”
“Remus.”
Remus clamped his mouth shut, biting down on another apology. "Should I close my eyes?" he asked.
"Not yet," Sirius bit out. Then, he uncapped the tube and touched it to Remus' face. It was cold.
After a bit of what felt like him drawing on Remus' face, he took out a sponge looking thing and started blending in the concealer.
Eventually, Sirius broke the silence. "Are you going to tell me what happened?"
That was a tough question. He really, really didn't want to, but he supposed he owed Sirius at least some explanation. "I got punched."
Sirius looked up, alarmed. "By who? Is that why you weren't at school yesterday?"
"Yes. Believe it or not, it was even worse yesterday," he said. "And it doesn't matter who did it."
Sirius looked like he wanted to argue, but all he said was, "We'll agree to disagree. Did you at least hit the other guy back?"
"Doesn't matter," Remus said again.
Sirius huffed. "What does matter?"
"I made rent this month," Remus said. That had been a nice surprise; once he'd realized he'd forgotten to get his money from Greyback, he had stepped outside to decide if he wanted to return or risk eviction, and had instead found a duffel bag of cash on the doorstep. He tried not to think about where it came from.
A pained look crossed Sirius' face, but it was quickly replaced with concern. "At least there's that."
Remus ran a hand down Sirius' side. "At least there's that."
-
"Alright, class. Today is presentation day. I trust you all know your order?" McGonagall said after the bell rang.
Yes. Because McGonagall wasn't like other teachers. There would be no volunteering or waiting it out until the very end. She assigned everyone a time slot, and god forbid a group miss their time.
First up was a couple of cheerleaders whose names James didn't know, and he zoned out for the entire presentation, too busy worrying about the mission currently underway to rescue Regulus from Number 12 Grimmauld Place. He was happy for him, of course, but James couldn't help but feel that after years of trying for this exact thing, it was too easy.
All too soon, James and Lily were being called to the front, their Shrek slides being projected up onto the board.
They did very well, though it was really just the same presentation he had been giving for years. The "love yourself" theme was something James had been trying to get his friends to internalize since the day he met each of them.
Then it was Remus and Sirius' turn, and James couldn't help but grin at hearing Sirius recite verbatim Remus' little hallway speech from two weeks ago. The boy was whipped.
Unfortunately for them, Marlene and Dorcas weren't scheduled until the next day, but the last group scheduled for Tuesday was Snape and some kid called Mulciber.
They were doing their project on a book simply called Narc.
"Narc is about a teenager named Philip who is part of a New York gang," Snape began in his distinct bored drawl. "Philip is recruited by another gang to play spy with the promise of wealth and eventually escaping to a better life. For a while, all is well, but just before the climax, Philip is caught by the first gang and tortured for information and ultimately killed without managing to change a single thing in his life for the better." Snape looked at Remus then, and James' blood ran cold. He knew. "The theme of this story is that no matter how hard one tries, one may never change their station, and criminality follows a person wherever they go."
James tried to get Remus' attention, to do what, he didn't know. Maybe attempt to reassure him that Snape was wrong, but it was too late. Remus refused to look up from the table.
Shit.
-
Sirius took his phone out of his pocket again, checking the time. If Regulus didn't show up in the next five minutes, Sirius would have to call him.
He let his head drop against the door frame. He really did not need this today, not after his disastrous English class. Once they had left third hour, Remus had rushed off, refusing to talk to anyone. Sirius hadn't heard from him since, but he assumed it had something to do with Snape’s shitty presentation and the bruises he’d had him cover up that morning. Sirius hadn’t asked any questions, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t worried about his boyfriend.
Finally, he saw someone walking toward the office.
"I've been waiting-" The rest of the sentence died on his lips when he realized the person walking toward him was not in fact Regulus but Evan Rosier, and he looked terrified.
"I'll fucking kill them, I swear to God, I'll do it!" he said as soon as he was upon Sirius.
He held a hand up. "Woah, what? Where the hell is my brother?"
The scared look in Evan's eyes multiplied. "They took him, Sirius. Your parents took him home."
#wolfstar#dorlene#marauders#marauders era#fanfiction#fanfic#my fic#my writing#dorcas meadowes#marlene mckinnon#james potter#lily evans#remus lupin#sirius black#marauders fic#wolfstar fic#dorlene fic#jily fic#regulus black#raven cycle#raven cycle au#tw mentioned child abuse#anti snape#keeping the faith
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𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐤𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐢 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠
Word count: 1200+
Contents/Warnings: (1) Fushiguro Megumi x gn!Reader (2) Classic training but no fighting scene I apologise (3) A... dirty humor joke? (4) Idiot in love cough cough (5) Laidback romance, this may become a pattern on my fanfiction :3
A/N: Hello, I introduce myself as Hara! This is my very first written piece! I would like to apologise for any typos, english is not my first language; that being said, I hope this works out alright! :)
It's around mid afternoon, the sky painted in a vibrant blue with multiple clouds scattered around, Fushiguro recalls having started training right after lunch; he politely declined Maki's suggestion of training together, it wasn't about strength or fighting hand to hand today, the struggle was his shikigami. Lately, he's been having problems over teamwork - before, he thought such a thing was impossible, since all of the shikigami were under one will alone, being his. Yet the amount of times the divine dogs have bumped into eachothers, sometimes Nue would simply skip past the target, not paying attention to it at all.
Or perhaps, he himself was to blame. Fushiguro likes thinking about you, more than he'd admit, but now it's starting to distract for real. That's what he need, to think of you- I mean, concentration! And maybe, new group attacks, that would do nicely, too.
He's been beating a tedious dummy for a hour and half now, maybe more. After managing to make up a combo or two, he sits down on the grass, just to breathe for a moment. Breathing is nice, he observes as the divine dogs go slack like their owner, now playing around with one another rather than chewing the dummies stuffing. His black and white snake is watching the banter between the canine shikigamis, tongue coming in and out just like a real snake. Nue settles upon the dummies ragged body, eyes closed- peacefully enjoying sunbathing. Fushiguro had no idea they were so lively until now, now he knew why people constantly asked if they could pet his shikigami.
He glances down at the frog supporting his arm, it's like they enjoy just laying on grass, just breathing like him.
"How many buddies out! Are you training today, Fushiguro?"
At the sound of your voice, you bet his lips casually turn upwars in a casual yet small smile. Kugisaki saw it from distance once, says she it's almost a robotic response.
"Yes, I'm training their cooperation." Fushiguro replies, swiftly getting up. He notices the frog from earlier making a beeline to you, as if to say hello.
So you crouch down and pets it briefly, smiling at the small creature.
"That ought to be hard, specially with a innefective dummy." You approach its remains, chuckling at all the stuffing and cloth scattered around. "Make me your target instead!"
Say what?
"I uh, come again?"
"I'll do the running and dodging, it's much practical this way!"
He has trouble accepting that, even if it's true. You mean more than an ally on his heart, and besides, that's some Itadori-level-recklessy. So he groans, slightly irritated and obviously, worried for your safety. "You'll get hurt."
"Don't we get hurt everyday? Even if there is an accident, I know you'll call them out and help me quickly, you notice things fast."
He does, Fushiguro would help you in a heartbeat- probably faster.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, lash out on me!"
Putting 'lash' and 'me' in the same phrase got heat rising on his ears, but he complied nonetheless. "Just letting you know, I'll stand here and the shikigami attacks."
You protest. "Wouldn't it be better if you fought among them?"
"For today, I'd like to focus on their compatibility only."
"Oh, got it! Next time we can work on the latter option then!" Next time. He wants there to be a next time.
Even though you're the one troubling his mind in battles, he's head over heels. He remembers when it all started, your relationship is basically pools worth of quality time. You came along with Itadori, tangled into the mess back in Sendai. Strangely, Fushiguro clicked with you even faster than Itadori- your collected personality was a great factor, even though you are just as cheerful as the cherry boy.
"You're spacing out, what's up?"
Fushiguro's gaze snapped up to meet yours, realizing his mistake. "Ah, nothing, let's start." His hands folded as your guard rose, so it begun. If you noticed his lame excuse, you didn't comment about it.
The ravenette was pleasantly relieved how easily you could deceive and dodge his attacks, his shikigami may leave a tear or two on your clothes, that he didn't have to worry about, because they're easily fixable. Naturally, the toughest for you to dodge was mostly his snake, sometimes Nue would surprise you from above, nothing you couldn't handle. He started intensing up using the combined attacks, and immediately noticed your faltering steps, earning a bruise on your calf. Although neither he or you stopped, adrenaline rushing through veins nonstop.
You somehow finished training with a bite mark over your forehead, not deep enough to be worth worry. The instant your bodies came to slack, his shikigami ran to you like little children lost in a supermarket. At this point, it was pratically multitasking, to pet both demon dogs while trying not to run out of breath having Orochi wrapped around your midsection. Megumi flushed over the affectionate antics, knowing they were a manifestation of feelings within himself.
Now, you and Fushiguro are spawled on the training field, neither showered, coated with sweat sticking to your clothes, but it didn't matter much.
"I never realized, just how many cursed energy do you have? It's surprising how many shikigami you kept our for this long time." Fushiguro heard you shifting to sit up, and followed you up.
"A bunch." It was not a creative nor informative answer, but you took it in with a smile on your face anyway.
He watched you get up to fetch a drink, careful to not trip over the shikigami also scattered around -- Fushiguro always 'forgot' to put them away next to you.
You handed him a strawberry yogurt box, the same drink also sat in your hands. "Well then, why are you spacing out so much these days? You can be honest with me."
'She's oblivious enough, I'm in need of advice, it's convenient.' So he thought, figuring if he disguised it enough, you wouldn't be able to tell. It's not a big deal if you did, though, saves time actually.
"Something's on my mind, and it troubles me during fights."
"Simple, you can just come in terms with it."
He glanced down, "Why?"
"The sooner the better, when you accept something, it comes at ease on your mind. I'm a hundred percent sure it works!" You gave him a thumbsup, slurping on the pink drink.
"Such faithful source."
"I'm sure it does! The thought keeps coming back because you're denying it, am I wrong?"
Not really, no. Fushiguro wants to keep it as friendship for the sake of your both careers within the jujutsu world; he knows it's dangerous, yet a part of him just wants to say 'fuck it', like if he had the guts to. The ravenette thinks it's a way too much generic way to describe what he feels, but it's the easiest, so he goes with it anyway. The back of his brain fears rejection, part of the reason why he hasn't made a move yet.
"I'll try it out."
"Good!" And you're always supportive no matter what, to the point it charms him more and more everyday.
For now, he's okay keeping it platonic. But, when the day after tomorrow comes, he just might confess.
#fushiguro megumi x reader#megumi fushiguro x reader#megumi+fluff#megumi x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu megumi#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x you
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Gotta walk before you fly...
journey noun
jour·ney | \ ˈjər-nē \
plural journeys
Definition of journey
1 : something suggesting travel or passage from one place to another
// the journey from youth to maturity
// a journey through time
2 : an act or instance of traveling from one place to another : TRIP
// a three-day journey
// going on a long journey
That's how Webster's online dictionary defines the word journey. Yes, the online version, because I can't recall the last time I saw my copy of Webster's dictionary, but I'm sure it was bought pre 2000.
It's pretty black and white, very cut and dry. You either make it to a destination...or you don't. If there's a job that needs to be done in Arizona, and you only make it as far as Nevada, you don't get credit for making it that far. You either do the job...or you don't.
We live in a time where people want to make you feel better about failing. I'm not quite sure when it happened, but it's happened (past tense) it's here...NOW. I don't recall being born into the world and the doctor handing me some orange slices and a participation trophy and saying "good job for being born". He slaps you on the ass and says, "yep, you can expect to be slapped about a billion more times in life. Good Luck"
That's how I recall things. Whether it really happened or not (the slap) is irrelevant, because you learn pretty quickly that life punches...hard. Perhaps in those early years you don't understand the concept, but you learn pretty quickly, that your actions have consequences.
Consequences.
This journal is about a journey...One that has been ongoing since my youth. The journey that a majority of America can certainly relate to. I guess, you could use so many words to describe it.
A search for weight loss. A journey towards health...clarity...Self love.
Evolution.
This isn't a vanity project meant to satiate my ego. It's about accountability. I have a goal in my head, and anything less, would be complete failure. Those are the standards I have set for myself, and if they seem harsh, you don't have to like them. This isn't about anyone other than myself.
This is my journey.
Do I know how long it will take? Not exactly
Is it achievable? All things are possible
Are you frightened? Beyond reason
The first part of my plan has to focus on health. You see these last few years have been so much more than a struggle. It began with a "mystery" illness" carrying symptoms ranging from Dizziness to Nausea. I saw doctors...many many doctors. And they were determined that it was equilibrium related. I had cat scans, hearing tests, I even had a high tech test where they filled my ears with water and shook me like a paint can. They never seemed able to pinpoint things.
In the meantime my personal life was spinning out of control. I was happily married, but I couldn't work, I couldn't function in normal life. One by one all of the things I had worked so hard for were taken from me. Car, Job, all culminating in the loss of my house. Our house. Here I was at 42 with a wife and 2 kids, and no place to go.
It was a dark time...one I don't care to go into much more detail here.
My wife and I ended up in Nevada and one of the first things we did was get set up for medical care. I began seeing new doctors, and at the time the thought of going through all of this all over again from the beginning, was more than i could bare.
But it actually saved my life.
Turns out I had 2 clogged arteries.
The doctors here took things step by step and instead of saying things like, "you're too young for this to be something major". They listened to my symptoms, made observations, and suggested we move in a different direction.
It was my heart. One of the symptoms I had complained about to previous doctors was heart palpitations and irregular heartbeat. But for whatever reason, they were hyper focused on my head. I'm not here to condemn them for not testing for these things previously, I don't have time for grudges. If I was going to hold a grudge it would be towards myself.
I have lived the majority of my life overweight. And I'm done with it. I can't do it anymore. I don't want to do it anymore.
So I've decided to start this blog. This is my reflection staring at me in the mirror carved in stone. This is the weight flashing on my scale come to life. This is the sweat dripping from my skin and the air forced from my mouth put to words. I am accountable from here on out. I take responsibility. This is my journey.
It begins with a single step....
2/4/2019 9:30am
Starting weight- 306
Listening to: Roy Rogers- Ride Concrete Cowboy, Ride
Current Mood- Crazed
Fasted- 14 hours
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