#and shes trying to fucking act like shes tryinf to hide the urge to cry
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I literally just got home after being gone for the weekend and Im already being woken up by 9am to my step mom making a show of trying not to cry because shes so upset Im grumpy and annoyed .5 seconds after waking up after also not sleeping till 5am
#she needed help letting the dog out#just opened our doors and didnt say anything#and when she did and I responded multiple times she somehow didnt hear me#and then got pissed we didnt get up asap#and despite the fact Ive been trying not to cry since I stood up#and I get slight attitude for even just a second#and shes trying to fucking act like shes tryinf to hide the urge to cry#but doing it in a way where she DEFINITELY wants me to fucking notice#like its a show shes now so upset#I also have a headache#and then also heard her tell the dog potty later#and then she stil continued to get him ready and be pissed we werent up fast enough#I feel like garbage and my head hurts#but its not like she fucking cares#or would ask or would fucking care if I said so#shes a living double standard#her mental health and physical health excuse her to be shitty and horrible and pissy and uncomfortable#but if it happens to me theres a 50/50 she’ll be caring or not give a single fuck and possibly try and blame me more than comfort me#and if its my brother theres only like a 20% chance she’ll NOT scold him for being unwell#Im caring less and less when she gets actually upset#even when its for valid and legit reasons#I just cant fucking deal with this shit and this fucking hypocrisy and double standards#and every other fucking thing#i thought I was getting better and feeling better about/with her but she makes it hard#I KNOW my life and my health wouldve been better off if she’d never fucking shown up#there was lots of good yes#but at what fucking cost?#MOST of my fucking issues and horrible fucking weird problems that have made functioning healthily impossible for me-#are tied directly to her and shit she repeatedly said or did while we were growing up#she broke me
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