#and regulus not being able to touch anyone the ANGST

[lexithwrites]

Watching X-Men and my god imagine Regulus with Rogue’s powers and Remus with Wolverine’s BRO

[thebestofoneshots]

Gilded Constellations | (wolfstar x reader)

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Pairing: Wolfstar x Reader Word Count: 10.7 K Warnings: ANGST! Use of the unforgivables, bIood, major and minor character dеath, major sad moments, mental breakdowns, taking characters to their breaking point, pain, griеf… I’m really sorry. Prompt: What happens when you hear something dreadful happening, will you stand up for what's right? Will you stay quiet for the greater good? This IS a Wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it. Proofread by lovely: @aremuslupinsimp

A/N: This chapter is getting shadowbanned no matter what I change so please like, reblog and comment so it does not go under the radar.

Chapter 44: No One But You 

A hand above the water An angel reachin' for the sky Is it raining in Heaven? Do you want us to cry?

Where the hell is the alcohol in this party? You wondered as you stepped out of the room, dealing with Arkalis and Evan was more than enough for the rest of the night. If only you could find a corner, pull out a book and focus on that without being bothered by anything or anyone else, you’d be satisfied. Of course, that could not be the case, could it? 

“Well look who’s here?” Barty said with a smile as he blocked your path. 

“Oh, Barty!” you said as you tilted your head. “You should probably go look for Evan, he seemed like he needed… a friend.” 

Barty’s eyes seemed to burn when you spoke, but you stood your ground, even as he approached you with ferocity. He might be as tall as you were, even if younger, and he might have been able to overpower you in the past, but he was not about to make a scene in the middle of the party, he wasn’t dumb, he had never been. And clearly, he wasn’t important enough for the deatheater clique to be at the private dinner, he didn’t need unwanted attention. 

“If you did something to him again…” he said, voice low and threatening.

You blinked calmly at him, “Barty… in this party, you should be careful with the things that come out of your mouth.” He grabbed onto your wrist, anger clearly seething from him. “I didn’t touch him,” you said as you looked down at his hand and then back at his face, “I’d suggest you’d have the decency of doing the same.” 

Then you felt a hand on your shoulder, Barty finally let go of his hold on you but stayed in his place, glaring now at the person standing behind you. 

“And I would suggest you turn the fuck away before I hex you again. Remember where you are Crouch. This might be Arkalis’ dinner, but my father was the one to invite Tom here.” 

Barty gave you another look of hatred and then stormed off. You sighed and turned back to look at Regulus. 

“Did he hurt you?” he asked, eyebrows softly knit in concern.

“No,” you said as you shook your head and moved your hand a little bit, it was the same arm Evan had latched onto you earlier, but frankly, after having fallen from your broom, punched by bludgers, dragged by water spirits and scratched by werewolves, this felt like nothing. “Is there Firewhiskey here?”

“Firewhiskey?” Regulus asked in disbelief. “You want to drink?” 

“Oh, don’t tell me you’ve never sneaked out Firewhiskey from your father’s stash.” Regulus gave you a look in return that was answer enough. “So, you’ve never drunk?” 

He shook his head and you laughed at that, “Such a good boy,” you teased. In response, Regulus pushed you to the side, which only made you laugh a little more. “Let’s find some,” you said with a smile, Regulus tilted his head to the side disapprovingly. 

“It’s a terrible idea to do it here,” he responded. 

“Come on, Reg, there’s no way you want to see whatever the hell those people consider to be a show, do you?” 

Regulus averted your gaze, and you narrowed your eyes at him. Does he know something…

A glass of cold water over your dress diverted your thoughts. “Oh, sorry,” the girl said, she had a streak of white hair pulled back behind her ears and looked far from being sorry. 

Your dress was black, so whatever she had poured, certainly didn’t ruin the look, even if it was fucking freezing you now, “Whatever, I’ll just use a drying spell,” you said as you pulled your wand out and waved it over your dress. 

“You’re Silas’ daughter, aren’t you? You were sitting next to Lucius at the dinner.” 

You turned to her with a small frown, she was the girl talking to Barty earlier, the one that looked like Sirius and Regulus. You extended your hand politely, “I’m afraid I don’t know who you are.” 

She seemed irritated at your lack of recognition. “This is my cousin Narcissa, Cygnus’ daughter,” Reggie said, introducing her to you.  

Cygnus’ daughter… Where had you heard that name? Right, Andromeda’s sister, you thought. You hadn’t spoken much to Andromeda Tonks, though Sirius and Remus had shown you some of her letters. As far as you knew, she had been kicked out of the family in the same way Sirius had, and her sisters had done nothing to help them. But then again, Regulus hadn’t helped Sirius either and you didn’t hate him for that. 

“Nice to meet you,” you added, she gave you a look before actually shaking your hand. 

“You’re dating Sirius,” she added, her tone making it clear that she looked down on you for it. 

“Cissy,” Regulus said in a warning tone. 

“I am, he’s delightful, you should know since you grew up together.” 

She scoffed. “Sirius is a disaster. He would always spark chaos and make stupid pranks on the parties, I’m glad he’s not invited anymore. He wears that awful leather jacket all the time, pretending to be a muggle or whatever and he’s insufferably loud.” 

“All of which I find absolutely charming,” you replied with a nonchalant smile, “You do not?” 

Cissy, as Regulus called her, scoffed again. “Just stay away from Lucius,” she added before leaving you and Regulus behind in favour of talking with someone else, her long hair flipping behind her in a rather majestic way that you would have praised had she not been a total bitch to Sirius. It must be in their genes, you thought, the Blacks have amazing hair.

You turned to him with a raised eyebrow. “The hell was that about?” 

“Lucius is her fiancé, she must have seen you talking to him at the dinner,” Regulus said. “You… looked very interested in whatever he was telling you.” 

“Oh, that?” You asked with a smile that turned into a smirk, “I was trying to piss Evan off.” 

“I figured.” 

“Not sure if I should take that as a compliment or an offence.” Regulus raised his eyebrows at you and you gasped in disbelief. Then you spotted someone serving themselves a drink over in the far corner, it was the bar. You smirked, “Come on Reg, I’ll teach you how to drink.” 

“I don’t need to–” 

“Just come,” you added and pulled him along with you, you managed to convince the house elf there to give you a half-empty bottle of Fire Whiskey after telling them Arkalis had asked you to take them to him and pulled Reggie along towards a balcony. 

“It’s cold,” he said as the two of you stepped out, you could see the puff of condensed air blowing from his mouth as he spoke. 

“This’ll warm you up,” you said as you offered him the bottle. He gave you an exasperated look that was an awful lot like Sirius’ but took the bottle in his hands anyway, taking a small sip and scrunching up his face as he felt the bitter taste. Then he coughed and covered his mouth with his arm as he returned the bottle to you with a disgusted frown, you were laughing so much it took you a second to lean closer to him and place your hand on his back. “You all right?” 

“No wonder they call it Firewhiskey,” he said as he managed to catch his breath. You laughed again, still rubbing your hand over his back, he shook his head as he stood straight. He was a deal taller than you now, it hadn’t quite settled back in school, but it was evident now. “Why would you even drink it?” 

“Do you not feel warmer?” you asked as with a raised eyebrow, he seemed to think about it for a second. You were now taking your own sip of the bottle. 

“A warming spell would for sure do the trick.” 

You sighed and leaned over to look at the sky, you could see Sirius’ star up there, shiny and beautiful, just like him. Walburga and Orion might have been awful, but they definitely had a good eye for picking out names, even if they were just copying those of the stars. 

“Yeah, but it would take away the fun,” you said, head still tilted up and looking at the sky. You heard a few whispers from the inside, and you leaned your head over the window, there were people crowding a certain area of the room. Regulus stepped in between you and the window. 

“How’s school going?” 

You gave him a look, that was a stupid question. 

“I mean, I saw you at the Slug Party, you’ve been doing good at potions, haven’t you?” he pressed. 

“Haven’t I?” you asked with a frown, allowing your gaze to turn back to him. “It’s all thanks to my partner, he’s really good?” 

“Sirius?” Regulus asked, he had never heard of his brother being remarkably good at potions. 

“What? No, my potions partner, Remus.” 

“Ah… of course,” he said, now he had heard how good his brother’s best friend was. He was even a prefect. 

“But I’m shit at transfiguration,” you said with a shrug. “I don’t think Minnie and Horace are friends enough to discuss such things, though.” 

“I could teach you,” he offered. 

“Thanks, but I’ve already got a tutor.” You tilted your head to the side to try and see inside and then he moved, blocking your line of sight again. “Regulus?” 

“Yeah?” he asked, playing dumb. 

“You know what’s happening there, don’t you?” 

He swallowed thickly, “Nothing you should be concerned about, it’s adult stuff.” You shook your head as that and motioned to move inside but he stopped you again. “Please!” He sounded desperate. “Let’s stay here, and drink a bit more, I’m… I’m not looking forward to seeing my parents again.” 

You sighed, you knew how delicate it was for both Regulus and Sirius to deal with Walburga and Orion, and perhaps you shouldn’t have listened, you should have followed your instinct and walked inside, but there was something about the pleading expression Regulus had made that convinced you. You huffed out a breath and turned back to him. “How’s school for you? Messing with Severus didn’t put you on the spot, did it?” 

Regulus shook his head and carefully moved to the side, pulling his wand from his pocket and secretly casting a spell towards the doors so the sounds from the inside wouldn’t filter to the outside. You were looking at his face, so determined to figure out his emotions that you failed to notice what he was doing.   

“Not at all,” he responded. “Severus thinks it was all your fault.” 

You pouted at that, “How could it even be my fault, he’s the one that ate the snacks, I didn’t even offer them to him.” 

Regulus laughed at that, “So you had nothing to do? No emotional manipulation involved?” 

“What do you take me for? A housemate?” 

“Haven’t you been saying you ‘missed the whole indoctrination’ part by getting to Hogwarts so late?” 

“Doesn’t change the fact the snakes can be very manipulative. You know the muggles think they’re to blame for losing paradise.” 

Regulus huffed as he shook his head, he was just proving your point right then and there, “Well, I’ve never met a snake with ‘Vixen’ as a nickname.” 

“You know about that?” you asked in disbelief. “How do you even know about that?” 

“The entire school knows about that! Potter isn’t exactly subtle when he calls you. To be honest, I thought he was pissed the first time I heard it, and then I was surprised you weren’t insulted by it.” 

“It’s an inside joke.” 

“I could tell,” he responded and then smirked, almost imperceptibly, “I think it fits.” 

“Ass,” you said with a laugh and pushed him lightly. He laughed along with you. 

Talking with Regulus was fun, he told you more about the Slytherin common room, he mentioned seeing the giant squid through their window once when he was in his second year studying for a quiz late at night, and he told you about the time he had done the quidditch trials, back when Dorcas was still in the team. He asked you about the race, and you told him that’s when you and Sirius got together. 

You also told him about some of the fun things you had done with the boys, like picnics near the lake and even sneaking out at night to get books from the forbidden section. He asked you to teach him the disillusionment charm one day, and you promised you would. 

While the rest of his family was a piece of work, you thought Regulus had come out as nice as Sirius, even if a little more stuck up. You didn’t mind though, it was part of his own charm. He’d make a great brother-in-law…

“And then Solacis added the last ingredient of the potion, and it blew up on their faces…” he told you with a smile, mimicking the explosion with his own hands. The alcohol had warmed his cheeks and made him a lot more expressive by now. You laughed along with him. 

“Yeah? And what did Slughorn do?” 

“Nothing, he was being distracted by Nox so they wouldn’t fail the both of us,” he explained. “Nox added dragon breath to his potion and it clogged the entire classroom with purple smoke.” 

“For real?” 

He nodded excitedly, it was nice to see Regulus more relaxed, “Nox thought it was amazing and tried switching the ingredients around, he now knows how to make smoke of almost any colour, we’ve used it on parties so many times since then.” 

“I had no idea Nox was that into potions…” 

“Oh, he loves them! Slughorn doesn’t like him too much though, he’s always doing his own experiments in the back of the classroom instead of focusing on the class, and often ends up changing the potions around and–” a harrowing scream cut through his words. 

Your head snapped towards the inside and Regulus blinked a couple of times. His spell! It had worn out. 

But I’m not that drunk, he thought, he was certainly having fun, but that was just a consequence of hanging out with you.

“What the hell was that?” you asked as you looked inside, but he stood in between you and the door in a second.

You gave Regulus a stern look but he shook his head really fast, he looked nervous, like a kid that had done something terrible and didn’t want his parents to find out. 

“Regulus,” you said as you tried to look over his shoulder, but he moved to block your sight again. “Regulus, what’s going on?” 

“Nothing. You… you don’t want to know, just trust me.” It was more a plea than anything else. 

You took a step back, “Have you been distracting me?”  

Regulus swallowed and then nodded, “I’m sorry.” 

“Why?” You asked, voice dry. 

“I don’t want you to see what’s happening in there.” 

“And…” 

“Your mum might have implied I’d be better this way as well.” 

You nodded, you weren’t angry at Regulus, at this point you understood why he did most of the things he did, and you knew whatever he was doing now, it was because he wanted to protect you from his parents and whatever it was they were doing. 

“Will you tell me what’s happening inside?” 

“Will you promise not to enter if I do?” 

You sighed, “You know I cannot do that, Reg.” 

“It’s dangerous.” 

“Yeah?! For me or for the person screaming?” 

“If you do anything reckless–” 

You squared your shoulders, determined. “Regulus, let me in.” 

He didn’t move. You tried to move to the side and he moved along with you, effectively blocking your way again, you scoffed, slightly exasperated. 

“Regulus, I–” You were interrupted by another harrowing screaming, and then a silence so eerie it chilled your very bones. You looked at him, straight in the eyes, his eyes were red-rimmed and shiny, you were about to ask him what the hell was going on when a cheer erupted from the inside. All of the wizards were clapping, as if whatever had happened was cause for celebration. 

Regulus winced at that which only made you worry more about what was happening inside. 

“You don’t need to see that, trust me,” he repeated. Thunder came from above and then a smokey green skull appeared in the sky. There was a snake protruding from its mouth, slowly swirling around the skull. You swallowed, you knew exactly what that was, Seraphina had shown you pictures, and she had told you that one of the reasons they’d cast that spell was because… they had just murdered a muggle. 

You swallowed thickly, the scream, the silence, the cheering. It all made sense now. They had been tоrturing someone and you had been distracted, you weren’t even given the chance to stop it. But then again, could you have stopped it? One person –nay, a 6th year– against an entire army of deatheaters, you might have been a good duelist, but you weren’t narcissistic enough to believe you could take them all down by yourself

Perhaps it really was better to be out here, avoiding the reality that was inside and hanging out with the one person in this entire party that you’d actually want to talk to. You didn’t appreciate being tricked, you hated that Regulus had decided to keep you in the dark, but at the same time, you were thankful. He had spared you from having to witness whatever horrors were being committed inside. 

You were just a kid, why was it your responsibility to stop it? Why was it your war to fight? It was fucking unfair. 

“Trust me,” Regulus said, “stay here, it’s better this way.” 

You swallowed, and there was another scream, you shut your eyes and turned your gaze to the side, you could feel tears prickling in your eyes. 

“It’s not your fault, you won’t be able to do anything, even if you witness it.” 

You turned back to look at him, your teeth pressed so hard against each other it hurt, “They’re kiIling muggles,” you whispered. 

Regulus sighed, his eyes were just as glassy as yours, “We can’t do anything about it.” 

You huffed and looked at nowhere in particular. There was another scream, and then another one, and then there was silence and cheers. You sank down to the floor, the snake in the sky was still crawling around. Your breath was slow and controlled as if you were trying to keep it together. The first scream, you couldn’t have blamed yourself for it. The first one out? You had no idea. But this one? 

You already knew what was happening and chose to stay outside with Regulus. You chose to ignore it and an innocent had diеd. Were you any different from your father now? He had sacrificed Sirius and Regulus for his political means –and he hadn’t even gotten them kiIled– and now you were letting those innocent people diе. 

For what? To be the perfect daughter? To play the part they asked you to play and then pretend like nothing had happened? To write a letter to Nightshade and Dumbledore telling them everything that had happened tonight and becoming a valuable asset? A spy? Was that what you wanted to be? Was that what you were meant to do? Was it worth it to let all these people diе, in order to win the war in the future? Were lives exchangeable like that? One life for a hundred, does that… make it worth it? 

There was another harrowing scream and then silence and then more cheers. You dug your head on your knees. 

You

Were

Heinous

As much as you considered your father to be.

Was stopping a war, winning a war, any different from the way he coveted power? Was it any difference in doing things for the greater good to doing things for power if the casualties were exactly the same? People were dying, and you were too much of a coward to do anything about it. Hiding behind a mask of righteousness and pretending it was all for the greater good –It was, but it didn’t feel right.

Sacrificing innocents was never okay, not even for the greater good, and yet… you were here, crouching on the floor, and wishing you were somewhere else, wishing you hadn’t heard that first scream, and that Regulus was still telling you about Nox and how good he was in potions and so on. You wanted to feel like things were normal, like there wasn’t a war; like you were a normal teen, not one being trained to be a soldier, a spy, a warrior.  

Was it selfish to wish for all of this to go away? To wish to be elsewhere? Were you selfish? And if you were then, for what? 

For letting innocents diе or for wishing you were ignorant about it? 

There it was, the eerie silence again. And then a wicked laugh. “Would you look at that? the little witch has claws?” 

The what she said?

 You turned your head to Regulus and the look he gave you in return made you instantly know that whatever was going on inside was as much of a surprise to him as it was to you. 

“Reg wha– What does she mean by witch?” 

“I–” he stuttered and turned to look back, there wasn’t much he could see, except for Bella’s black hair bouncing around as she said something else. “I’m not sure but–” 

“Filthy mudblood!” the same voice roared and then there were screams. 

But there was something about those screams, they were different from the rest… And not because it was a witch but because… you gasped when the realisation hit you –you knew that person.

“Nina,” you whispered. 

“What?” Regulus asked, confused. 

“That’s Nina!” you repeated as you stood up and tried to get inside. 

Regulus squared his shoulders to block your path, and then gently placed his hand on your arm, “There’s nothing you can do, forget it.” 

“They have kilIed muggles, Regulus. What’s stopping them from doing the same thing to her?” 

Regulus shook his head, “You cannot intervene, even if you know her.” 

“Even if I– Regulus, Nina’s my friend! Like you, like James! I would intervene for you, even if it did nothing.” 

“It would be stupid,” he replied, there were tears in his eyes, you could tell his mental struggle ran as deep as yours.  

“If it were me, would you just wait and let me diе?” 

Regulus closed his mouth, looking down while not being able to give you an answer. You weren’t sure you wanted to hear it either way. 

“Let me through, please.” 

“I wouldn’t let you diе,” he said, panic filling his voice, he felt like he had to reassure you, he wasn’t the evil one here, he just wanted to protect you. “But I’ve known you for years, you’re my brother’s girlfriend, it’s different,” his voice was filled with panic. 

“It’s not different for me,” you said as you shook your head, a sombre tone adorning your words. 

“I can’t let you go in,” he replied, his voice breaking towards the end. “I’m sorry.” 

You pulled him into a hug, you could sense him relax into your hug the second you did. She understands, he thought. 

 “I’m sorry too,” you whispered with a sad smile, he didn’t have enough time to react, “Petrificus totalus.” 

You caught him as he fell, his entire body leaning onto yours as you tried to hold him from hitting the ground. Regulus was a lot heavier than he looked but you managed to open the door again and drag him back inside. You smiled awkwardly at the person who spotted the two of you and lifted the bottle as an excuse. If they thought Reggie was passed out drunk, they wouldn’t think you’d charmed him to get in. The person nodded as if completely understanding and you dragged Reggie to a chair. 

“I’m sorry,” you whispered again, accommodating him to look asleep. 

And then you walked as fast as you could towards her screams. 

It took all your strength not to break down at the sight, there were people –not people, their bodies– on the floor. They weren’t covered with bIood or anything like that, it wasn’t gory, it was just… harrowing. At least 7 of them, all of them on the floor, horrified expressions on their faces. They probably had no idea why they were there and had been hexed and tоrtured till the light escaped his eyes.

The scene enraptured you so much the screams in the background almost faded out, especially when you saw someone you instantly recognized. The lady at Kings Cross, the one that had hugged Nina, she was there too, you sobbed. You had allowed that to happen, you had allowed them to kilI Nina’s mum because you were too scared to intervene. 

“Crucio!” you heard the woman scream again. 

You turned your face away from them and towards the turmoil, there were many people crowding around her and Nina, so many that you could barely see the top of her blonde hair, and the only reason you knew Nina was still there was because of her screams. You spotted Tom, Arkalis and the man you now knew as Rodolphus Lestrange all sitting and chatting at a faraway table as if none of it was happening. Tom would often turn to see what was going on, smile and then go back to the conversation with a pleased expression.  

You shuddered and tried to find a way through the people. You had to push a few wizards around and got an angry elbow shoved in the rib at some point but you pressed on. Eventually, you reached the edge of the circle, and you had to hold back the tears threatening to spill out as your young friend squirmed, her long hair sprawled all over the floor, and tears in her eyes. She had her mouth determinedly closed and her brows furrowed, she was trying to resist screaming again, all to avoid giving the woman the satisfaction. 

“I’ll find a way to help you,” you mumbled as you looked around for possible solutions. If you had had more time perhaps you could have used a mist bomb to create a commotion, if you had more time to think of a solution, perhaps you would have burned the curtains down with incendio or caused some other kind of distraction to drive people away from Nina and sneak her out. But you had no time, and your mind was filled with the stress of seeing poor Nina on the floor, with that heart-wrenching expression on her face, and the soft whimpers that she couldn’t help but let out as she continued holding her cries and the woman with curly hair twisted her wand to inflict more pain. 

If you had acted earlier, if you hadn’t let fear and cowardice drive you away from the incident, perhaps things wouldn’t have ended up the way they had, but you had been selfish, and you were now facing the consequences of your own decisions, them being mainly the mental strain and the stupidity of the action you were about to commit. 

“CRUCIO!” the woman shrieked again. “Come on luv, don’t be shy, we want to hear your cries.” 

She twisted her wand and Nina let out an agonising cry. This can’t continue, she’s not gonna last. 

“Come on little mudblood, cry louder!” the woman said, enjoying herself so much you felt like you wanted to puke. “Entertain us!”

You stepped forward, “Stop!” You shouted. 

The woman turned to you and, surprised you had spoken and twisted her wand again, Nina cried, but the moment she spotted you, there was a glimmer of hope in her eyes. 

You raised your wand at her, “I said STOP!” 

“Silas’ daughter?” she asked, clearly diverted. “Thought you were snogging my little cousin Regulus somewhere in a corner.” 

You held her gaze, “Last warning,” you added. 

She laughed haughtily in return, “You think you could do anything to me? What are you? A 4th year?”

You were so focused on the woman and Nina, that you weren’t paying attention to the things surrounding you, at least you had gotten her attention enough to have her stop torturing Nina, who was now struggling to catch her breath. 

In the far corner, Orion and Tom had turned to look at the scene with a perturbing interest, as if they wanted to see the bIoodshed that your stupid disobedience would cause. Evan had gripped onto Barty’s forearm and pulled him away from the circle and both of your parents were rushing towards you as fast as you could, but the crowd, which seemed just as interested in the situation, was making it harder for them to reach you. 

“None of your fucking business,” you replied. She turned her wand back to Nina and you stepped in her way in two long strides, she laughed again. 

“You’re a Gryffindor, aren’t you? There’s no way a Slytherin would be so recklessly stupid.” 

“Let her go,” you said sternly. “She’s a witch, just like you.” 

The woman laughed again. “She’s as much of a witch as the rest of them,” she said with a smile and pointed at the pile of bodies behind her, “Muggle-borns are abominations that shouldn’t exist. So weak they need real wizards to defend them, don’t they, Luv?” She said the last bit looking at Nina, she was still on the ground, eyes shiny with unshed tears but she held her head high. 

“I’m only making things even,” you replied, “do you really feel superior when you need thirty-plus wizards for torturing a 14-year-old?” 

The woman scoffed, “Do you even know who you’re talking to?” 

“No, but I bet I can guess,” you replied. “Dark curly hair, pretty but dеadly, a little crazy –I assume due to inbreeding– and you were sitting next to Rodolphus, which makes you one of Cygnus’ daughters. I met Narcissa today, and you’re definitely not Andromeda, which leaves out… Saiph? No wait, wrong star, it’s Bella, isn’t it?” 

She gave you a deranged smile, “Bellatrix.”

“Yeah, whatever,” you responded. “Now let’s leave this nonsense behind, and–” 

“Crucio,” she said pointing her wand behind you, Nina cried again. 

“Stop!” you shrieked. “Confringo!”

Bella barely managed to stop your spell and turned to you with rage, “Can someone take care of her?” she asked to no one in particular. Suddenly there were several wands pointing your way, but no one cast a spell. No one was brave enough to attack Silas’ daughter directly. 

Bella smiled and pointed her wand towards you, “Expelliarmus,” she said with a smile, your wand left your hand faster than you could react. 

She gave you a wicked grin as she pointed her wand at Nina again. She looked like she couldn’t take another moment of it, and you were running out of ideas. “Stop! I have a better prey for you.” 

Your father said your name sternly as if he could read your thoughts. 

You ignored it completely, “Why bother with a muggle-born when you could be torturing someone who’s mixed-race.” 

Your father screamed your name again, but Bella seemed interested enough to lower her wand and look at you, she wanted to know whose life you’d propose instead of Nina’s. 

“A mixed-race you said? Whoever could that be?” 

“Me!” you said and took a short breath, “I’m part-fairy.” Several gasps echoed in the room followed by whispers of the crowd.

“She’s lying!” your father spat.

“I am not!” You added quickly. 

“She’s trying to buy time.” 

“I can prove it!” you said desperately. “Use diffindo,” you told one of the people next to you. 

“Do not dare to touch my daughter!” your father roared. 

You looked around, trying to find Barty or Evan, since you knew neither of them would think twice before hurting you, but they were nowhere to be seen. Worst time to be fucking absent, you thought. No one dared to do it. 

“Fine then, bunch of cowards,” you said looking around before bringing your arm to your mouth. You had never done this, but you had practised half transfigurations, you focused all your energy on your mouth and managed to turn your canines into Vixen’s, and then you bit onto your skin and dragged your arm, slicing through it, you didn’t even wince. 

“That proves nothing,” Your father said. He was still trying to reach where you were.

“No, it doesn’t,” you responded. You could feel the metallic taste of your bIood in your mouth, you wondered if you looked as deranged as Bella did now. “But this will,” you said and focused your gaze on the cut you’d made, “Revelio.” 

A single drop of bIood fell from your arm, everyone witnessed it change colour and clash onto the ground in a shiny, silver drop. There was another collective gasp. Bellatrix cackled and your father looked at you with an expression you couldn’t quite pinpoint, a mix of desperation, rage and disappointment.

“Well, well, well,” a voice boomed from the back of the room, “what an interesting little plot twist.” The crowd parted to allow the dark lord to walk towards the centre of the room, he seemed pleasantly entertained. “Silas,” he said as he turned to your dad calmly. “Anything you care to explain?” 

You turned to your father, being thankful that everyone’s attention had turned the other way, and looking for someone distracted enough for you to do your next move. 

Your father was about to say something but was quickly interrupted by your mother, “He didn’t know! I lied to him.” 

Your head snapped back towards them, Why is she–? 

“Is that true? Silas?” 

Your father stood straighter, looking indifferent. “I had no idea,” he lied blatantly, “I wouldn’t be married if I did.”

“That’s a bunch of bullshit–” 

“Silence child,” you were interrupted by the dark lord who was staring at your dad with interest, he hadn’t said the words to the spell, but your tongue was tied, and you couldn’t emit a word anymore either, “the adults are talking.” 

You moved towards them when you realised you wouldn’t be able to speak. “Incarcerus,” Tom’s voice boomed and a set of ropes appeared from thin air, binding you to the spot you were currently on. His spell was much stronger than Evan’s had been, it was as if the more you moved the more the ropes tightened around your arms, digging into your skin sharply. Tom turned to your mother. “Elaborate.” 

“I met him, I knew he wouldn’t like me if he knew of my heritage so I lied and hid it from him.” 

“Well, I find this is the perfect little set-up for you to prove your loyalty,” Tom said with a simple smile. “Torture her.” 

What? You thought, head snapping towards your mother sharply, forgetting about the ropes entirely. 

Your mother and father exchanged a look, your mom nodded, almost imperceptibly, and then your father raised his wand against her, “Crucio.” 

There was a wicked laugh from Bellatrix as your mother sank to the ground and started screaming. You stared at the scene as if petrified. If there was something you had never doubted in the past, it was the love your parents had for each other. How could he– how was it even…

You turned back to the ropes and started to desperately fight against them. When you realised it wasn’t working you went for plan B, you turned into Vixen and jumped as fast as possible, snatching a random wizard’s wand from their hands as you turned back. 

Of all the terrible ideas you’d had today, this might have been the worst. You barely had enough control over the spell with your own wand, but you had to do something. You took a deep breath and pointed your wand at Bellatrix, “Pestis Incendium.” 

A giant fire exploded out of the tip of the wand you had stolen, prompting the people around you to step back several metres as the fire turned into a massive Chimera. Fiendfyre was a dark and dangerous spell, and you had only practised it in a controlled environment with Nightshade watching your back. But the Chimera you had formed now was bigger and angrier than anything you’d ever created, she was dеadly. The massive winged lion-goat was burning everything in its way as people ran to the sides and attempted to apparate the hell away from the room. 

But Evan’s house was charmed against apparitions, a few of them were caught in the fire as they attempted to run, others tried to fight against it, with water spells, but they seemed to do nothing against the angry beast you’d created. The heat quickly filled the room, smoke from burning things wafting through the air and making it harder to see. You searched for your mother, but you couldn’t spot her at all, so you turned back to Nina who was looking at you with an awed struck expression. You picked up a wand from the floor and handed it over to her before helping her up and casting a disillusionment charm around the two of you. 

“We need to get out,” you whispered, as you grabbed onto her hand and pulled her along with you. You sped through the running crowds as the curtains and furniture started to catch on fire and remembered you had left Regulus petrified. 

You ran towards him, pulling Nina alongside you and finding him still unconscious in the place you’d left him. “Finite Incantatem!” you said and Regulus opened his eyes hastily. He looked around confused and opened his eyes wide when he spotted the giant Chimera behind you, being even more confused when it completely ignored him and turned to the other side. You grabbed onto his arm, leaving traces of bIood over his white shirt, “Get out!” 

“What?” he asked, confused. 

“I won’t be able to control it for much longer, get out!” you repeated and pushed him towards the window before you pulled Nina to the side again. 

She used her wand and started hexing people as you sped through the crowd and toward the window behind the snack area. If you could reach the hedge maze, you’d have enough time to think of a better way to get the hell away from there. 

Finally, you spotted your mum again, she was right in front of the Chimera, using relashio in an attempt to slow her down. You raised your want towards your fiendfyre to drag it away from her but there was a spell cast in your direction. 

“Stupefy!” Bellatrix said as you fell to the ground, you lost control over the Chimera completely and the beast used one of its paws to crush your mother. You could hear your father’s scream ringing in your ears alongside yours, followed by a sob as tears welled up in your eyes. Bellatrix smiled, “Well, well, well, would you look at that, one little fae gone, and one to go,” she said as she pointed her wand towards you. 

You were on the floor, still trying to get a grasp of the situation and attempting to gain control over the Chimera again but it was pointless, she was doing whatever she wanted. Bellatrix smiled and raised her wand towards you, “Avada–” 

“Crucio,” Nina shrieked next to you, and Bellatrix instantly fell to the ground, with a cry. Nina’s curse was so strong that the woman continued to scream madly as she pulled onto her hair. “CRUCIO!” Nina repeated. You looked at her in amazement and she gave you a half smile, fear hidden behind her eyes. “She’s not going to touch you ever again,” she reassured and extended her hand your way, you took it and she helped you up. “Ferrum Incarcerus,” she said and suddenly a set of chains bound Bellatrix Lestrange, “Flagrante,” she said next and the woman started to cry in pain as the chains started to heat up and burn. “Call me a Mudblood again, you bitch!” Nina spat, and you recast the disillusionment charm around the both of you. 

Clutching to each other you walked all the way to the snack table “Bombarda!” you shouted, the window blew into pieces, and your Chimera went wild, growing wider and wider. You looked back once more, Bellatrix was still crying over the chains. There was a tall man, Cygnus, you assumed, trying to help her out of them, but Nina’s spell was strong and whatever he was doing wasn’t working properly. 

You spotted your father clutching the burned remnants of your mom and you stared at the scene almost petrified. You had done that, you had murdered her. 

Nina looked at you with tears in her eyes and decided to avoid staring at the pile where she knew her mother’s body would be, focusing on you, and on getting the hell away from that damned hellhole you’d ended up in. 

“Come on,” she pulled onto your arm. “We have to go, come on!” 

“That–” you said, still looking, the Chimera was bigger now, angrier. “They’re gone.” 

“I know,” she said somberly, but then the urgency came back to her, “Come on, they’d want us to get out!” she added as she pulled onto your arm again, this time much stronger, you didn’t move at all. “Hey, look at me!” she added and grabbed your head in between her hands to force you to look at her, Nina might have been younger, but she seemed so much wiser than you at that moment. “This is awful. Things are awful, and it’s unfair. But two things are true: It was not your fault, and we need to get out.” 

You tilted your head to the side, she didn’t know, she didn’t know you had ignored her mother’s cries. Tears welled up in your eyes as you nodded, what a terrible person you were. “Okay,” you managed to say and allowed Nina to pull you alongside her and both of you managed to exit through the window. 

The cold was the first thing you noticed, white snow melting into puddles close to the house due to the fire. Messy mud on the floor making the pristine white layer of snow look brown and messy.

There were already Wizards outside, Regulus stood next to his mother and Narcissa, who kept looking inside as if waiting for someone to come out as well. Reggie too was looking around nervously, the last time he saw you, you were still inside and things were chaos. 

You took a small stone and threw it towards him, when he turned around you said “Vermillious,” and from the tip of the wand you had stolen, faint red sparks appeared. People weren’t looking your way, and they had been so faint that they were nothing in comparison to the amount of light that came from your blazing Fiendfyre, but you saw Regulus smile and nod your way. You turned to Nina, somehow much more composed than seconds ago. “You like puzzles, don’t you?” you asked her as you nodded towards the hedge maze. 

She smiled and gave you a nod, “Let’s get out of here,” she added, and the two of you walked inside. You ran through the maze, staying as close to each other as possible, and jumping from dеad end to dеad end. It truly was a headache, but Nina was as determined to get out as you were, so you followed her lead and continued walking behind her. 

“We can’t be too far from the way out, the magic stopping us from apparating is losing power the deeper we go, can you feel it?” 

“Yes,” you replied with a smile, and end to the nightmare, finally. 

“You can apparate already, right?” 

“Kind of,” you replied. “I mean, yes,” you reassured, you’d figure out a way, you’d both get out, you had to.

“Finite incantatem,” someone said when you rounded a corner, and both you and Nina raised your wands against him.

“Would you look at that, charming little butterfly and her mudblood friend,” The man said with a wicked smile, his silver hair flowing behind him. “You really thought you’d get away after causing so much havoc? My fiancé’s father is dеad because of your little ruse.” 

“Obscuro,” you spat, ignoring his remark and going straight for defence.

“Protego,” he returned. “Stupefy!” 

You blocked his spell with practised ease. “Nina behind me!” you said with determination, “Depulso!” 

He blocked as well, “Confringo!” 

You ducked and pulled Nina alongside you to the ground. His spell went straight to one of the hedges and things started to heat up, quite literally. The snow surrounding the area behind you melted and mixed with the dirt beneath, making mud similar to the one just outside the house. 

Lucius taunted and attacked with increasing ferocity, while you fought desperately to defend both yourself and Nina. Spells flew back and forth, lighting up the night with bursts of magic. With each passing moment, the intensity of the duel escalated, fueled by adrenaline and desperation. 

There was constant shouting and blocking. The more time passed and the more time you stood your ground against the man, the angrier he seemed to become. And you were tired, the amount of magic you had used up to conjure the Fiendfyre and the fact that she was still distracting and burning things back at the house, even if out of your control, was draining your energy –and magic– at worrying speeds. 

Combining that with the charred image of your mother that you desperately tried to bury in the back of your mind, you felt closer and closer to losing your grip and concentration, but you refused to give in, if there was something that you were, even in cases of life and dеath, was stubborn. 

“Getting tired, butterfly?” he asked with a cocky smile when he noticed you had almost tripped on a spell. 

“Opugno!” you responded, ignoring his taunting. Suddenly the branches of the hedges seemed to come alive as they went straight to get him.

“Deprimo!” he shouted before the spell hit him, and the floor started to shake, both you and Nina managed to step out of the way, on time, but the hole in the ground had now trapped the two of you in a dеad end. 

“Reparo!” you shouted, your previous spell had been strong enough to distract him while you attempted to build the ground back up so you could continue. 

“Impedimenta!” he shouted, and you were locked in place. When did he even get out of the hedges?

You tried to focus on shaking the charm off while he pointed his wand at you again. You were tired, but you had fought against Nightshade’s impedimenta several times before, and Lucius’ curse was much weaker. Despite that, the amount of magic you had already used had debilitated you and it seemed to require even more concentration than it had done in the past. That didn’t make it impossible. 

You were just getting a grip on the knot of magic that seemed to lock you in place when Lucius smiled, still bound by the hedges but gloating at the way you struggled. 

“Stupefy Maxima!” he shouted. You braced yourself to receive the spell, but instead, you felt a push from the side and ended up cornered against one of the hedges as Nina fell to the ground right in front of you. 

“Nina!” you shouted and dropped to the ground next to her in an instant, then you saw another spell leave his wand. You stared at the red bolt coming straight at you with watery eyes, thinking of all the things you wouldn’t be able to do, of all the things Nina wouldn’t be able to do because you had failed to save her. Anger and sorrow filled your thoughts as you stared at dеath straight in the eyes. 

But she didn’t stare back.

Instead, there was a bright, blinding light that lasted no more than half a second, and Lucius was thrown back against one of the hedges. It was as if his wand had backfired the spell on him. You stared at the scene confused, your bafflement increasing only when you spotted Barty Crouch shooting a stunning spell in Lucius’ direction. 

You turned back to Nina as the two of them fought the other, “Nina,” you said softly as you placed your hands around her face, her cheeks were cold but there was something gooey and warm behind her hair. As you pulled your hand back to look at it better you realised what it was. You shook your head and as you stared. “No, no, no, no...” you repeated over and over again as you leaned down only to realise she had fallen onto a sharp rock. “No, no… Nina, look at me,” you said, voice wavering. 

Her weary gaze turned to you, her eyelids were heavy and tired, but she smiled faintly when she saw you. “You’re okay,” she sighed. 

“No, no, no,” you repeated, tears already blurring your sight as you stared at her. 

“Go!” she said softly, reassuringly. 

“No!” you said again, voice cracking near the end. 

She nodded soothingly, “It’s okay, you have to go.” 

“Nina, please!” you begged. “We can do something, we can find a way to–” 

“Go,” she interrupted you calmly, more secure now. “You’re all right,” she said and smiled, “I can go happy knowing you’ll be alright.” 

“You can’t! I won’t leave, not without you,” you replied stubbornly, shaking your head as you said it.

“You can’t stop her now, the bargain’s made, the deal’s done,” she said simply. 

“No, please,” you said as you leaned onto her chest and allowed the tears to stream down your face, the girl somehow managed to place her hand over your hair and played with some of the strands with the little strength she had left. 

“You know… I’ve been bles-sed,” she said, her breath caught in her throat. “Blessed that you were the last thing I got to see,” she added with a smile, “thank you for saving me.” 

You felt her hand go limp over your head and you heard the last beat of her heart boom against your ear. “No!” you cried and stood back up to look at her. She had a pleased and peaceful expression on her face, contrasting completely with her stained blonde hair, and the rapidly changing colour of snow, no longer white, but scarlet. “Rennervate,” you said pointing the wand at her. Nothing. “Rennervate,” you repeated, tears streaming down your cheeks. “Rennervate, Rennervate, Rennervate.” 

“Stop it!” you heard Barty say from behind you. 

“Rennervate!” you said again, completely disregarding the boy. 

“Hey! You need to get out of here, people are coming.” 

“I don’t care!” You snapped. And turned back “RENNERVATE!” 

“You’re going to diе too! Her sacrifice would be for nothing!” 

“Go to hell!” You responded. You felt him trying to pull you away from her. “Get your filthy hands off me!” 

“Re- rennervate,” you repeated, it was more a whisper than anything else, a desperate cry, a futile attempt to cling onto something that wasn’t there anymore, that wouldn’t be there no matter what you did. Perhaps you had used up your magic, it was a stunning spell, not a kiIling curse. 

But it had also been the fall, and the rock.  

“Listen to me!” Barty said as he hauled you up by pushing you against one of the hedges. “She’s gone, and if you don’t move, you’ll be the same! Your stupid spell will do nothing to bring her back!”

“She’s my friend!” you shouted angrily as you tried to pry his hands away from your arms. But Barty was still stronger than you. “She’s my friend, and she’s struggling because of me. I won’t give up on her!” 

“THERE IS NOTHING TO GIVE UP ON! SHE’S FUCKING DЕAD!” 

Rage filled your gaze as you managed to focus on him again, you tried to push him off of you again, this time with much more determination. When he realised, he smiled and loosened his grip. 

“What?” you asked in disbelief. 

“Wrath is more useful than desperation,” he retorted. “You need to get out of here.” 

You gave one last look at Nina, her pleased expression made her look as if she was sleeping, soft and simple and happy. Could you trick your brain into thinking she was just sleeping if you tried hard enough? 

You turned back to Barty wearily, “Why– why are you helping me?” you asked with a wavering voice, emotions raw and unfiltered at this point. 

“Evan told me what you did for him. He’s taking care of Lucius and I’m much better at apparating than him.” 

You swallowed, distrusting, and turned to the side, Evan was indeed in the distance, performing some kind of spell on the man that had murdered Nina. Your mind was spinning with conflicting emotions. You wanted to lash out, to scream and rage against the unfairness of it all. But there was no use, Nina was dеad and no matter how much you cried about it, you wouldn’t bring her back.

“Look! If it makes you feel better you can hit me–” His words were cut short as your fist connected to his face. “Fuck! I’m trying to help you!” he winced as he reached for his nose. Your fist stung, but clearly, his face did just as much. 

“You’ve been an asshole to me for months.” 

“And I’m trying to do a good deed, bIoody hell!” he replied with a frown, you glared in return. “Come on, we need to get out.” 

“I don’t want to!” You said in a stubborn whisper, you wanted to lean against her and cry until the snow covered both of your bodies and you could forget about it all. 

“But she wanted you to,” he replied, there was bIood streaming down his nose, but there was an honesty in his gaze that you didn’t think Barty was capable of. “Allow me to help make her last wish true.” 

You swallowed, giving the boy one more weary look, “Can you try?” 

“Try?” he asked, confused. He was trying.  

“To save her.” 

“It’s pointless, if you couldn’t do it–” 

“My magic’s weak,” you admitted, despite yourself, it didn’t matter anymore, you didn’t care if Barty or Evan used it against you as long as Nina came back. 

The boy sighed, clearly thinking it was pointless, but leaned down next to Nina either way “Rennervate!” he said steadily.

Seconds passed by, agonisingly slow but nothing happened.

You let out a defeated breath, your mind was suddenly empty. You realised if you didn’t want to end up like her, you’d have to pull yourself together somehow. Barty tried again, even if you didn’t ask him, but the result was the same. You placed a hand on his shoulder. 

“Fine, let’s get out,” you said with a nod. Barty stood up and you tighten your grip around the wand you were holding, taking in a deep breath before pointing it at Nina. “Papilioscorpus,” you said, focusing all of your attention on that one spell.

Suddenly Nina’s body transformed into a heap of small blue butterflies. You held back the sob that threatened to escape by sucking in a breath as the small creatures broke off Nina’s body, one by one until there was no more of her, but hundreds of them. 

How unfair it was, that Nina had to diе because she wasn’t a pureblood, you thought, even if Nina would disagree. She didn’t diе because she wasn’t a pureblood wizard, she didn’t diе because they tortured her to dеath, she didn’t diе weak and defenceless and in despair, you had spared her from that fate. No, Nina diеd to save you, and she was pleased with the choice she’d made, simply because she wouldn’t want to live in a world where you didn’t exist. 

They flew up, circling you for a second before continuing their path, way above the hedges, and leaving behind the bIoodstained snow in search of somewhere warm. 

Barty turned to you with a soft expression and then raised his wand to the butterflies, “Irascor,” he said simply. A protective charm, so they would be safe, even if Nina hadn’t been. 

“Thank you,” you managed to mumble, as you saw them leave, not allowing yourself to wallow in the hopelessness you felt at such a stunningly beautiful sight. The snow-covered landscape, the stars shining above in the sky, the small snowflakes falling softly on the ground, all contrasted deeply with how you felt, how broken and in pain you were. You blinked back the tears and turned back to him. 

He nodded and cocked his head to the side, indicating you to follow him. It was slow at first, steps into a different direction, away from the bIood, now being covered by a fresh layer of snow, away from Evan and unconscious Lucius. 

Eventually, Barty started to pick up speed and you matched his pace, a welcome heat to the cold that had now chilled your bones. The dress you had, while long-sleeved, wasn’t exactly snow-friendly. Your heels long forgotten, left as you took faster and faster steps. The white cool of snow against your heels, helping you focus on anything other than all the previous events. 

Barty seemed to know exactly where he was going, and you followed him blindly. The traces of your steps had been long erased by the constant falling snow. If he was leading you to safety or back to the house, what difference did it make at this point? 

But then you felt it: the barriers against apparating were gone. “Where should I take you?” He asked softly, softer than you’d expect him to, the two of you breathing heavily as you tried to catch your breath. 

You blinked, looking around like a lost puppy. You had no mother, your father was a deatheater or something, and your home was probably not yours anymore –not that it had felt like one in the last few years. “I have nowhere to go,” you said the words as you realised their weight. 

Barty sighed, he knew what it was like to not belong. To feel lonely and forgotten and like he had to be outstanding to be cared for, to be worthy. He knew what it was to have no place to call home, but he had Evan now. He knew what that felt like, and for the first time since he’d met you, he empathised with you. “Sirius?” he offered, he might not like him, but he knew Sirius was as special to you as Evan was to him.

“He’s with the Potters, you cannot apparate there, you don’t know where it is… It would be too dangerous, for the both of us,” you said steadily, emotionlessly, trying to cling to your analytical side. If you blocked the emotions threatening to boil out of you, if you hid them so deep within your mind that they wouldn’t bother you then perhaps you’d be able to keep moving. 

“Secret hideout?” 

“I–” then you remembered. “School! Take me to Hogwarts!” 

“You can’t apparate there…” he said with a frown. Hogwarts was a brilliant idea though, it would certainly be safer.

“No, but, you can apparate on the Shrieking Shack! You’ve done it before.” 

“You want me to take you back, there?” he asked, disbelief laced in his tone.

“Yeah!” you said with a confident nod. 

“Are you… sure?” he asked again, perhaps the emotional toll of the night was getting to you. 

“Yes! I can get to the castle from there,” you repeated. 

He looked at you as if analysing the situation, you seemed pretty sure of yourself, so he nodded, grabbing onto your arm and pulling you closer, Barty was as tall as you, still growing, so you assumed he’d be taller. You ended up hugging each other in the most awkward way possible (a weird sort of hug where neither of you seemed to want to touch each other) before he apparated just outside the shack. 

You felt a sense of relief when you spotted the snow-coated building. You had made it this far, against all odds. But was it worth it? With how much it had cost? 

Barty gave you one last look, “Can I have the wand?” he asked in a relatively polite tone as he pointed to the wand in your hand. He was being considerate, even for his standards.

“Pardon?” You asked as your grip on the wand tightened. 

“I’m going to say I tried to stop you but you apparated away, you’re talented for your age so it’s believable enough. Evan is obliviating Lucius. We’ll try to get your actual wand back–” 

“Nina’s,” you said as you handed him the one in your hand. He frowned. “Get Nina’s wand, it’s more important.” 

“Why?” 

“I can buy another wand, but she… she can’t,” you said, trying not to let your features betray the emotions you felt. 

“But it’ll be useless to–” You gave him a mix between a pleading look and a glare, and he stopped his words, “we’ll try,” he conceded.

You smiled weakly, “Thanks.” He was about to leave. “Wait!” you stopped him, a hand on his shoulder, he turned to you, movements soft and calm, he knew you were on edge. “Priori incantatem, they will know you tried to bring Nina back if they check.” 

“Give me the wand,” you said and he did as told. “Now take it.” 

“Expelliarmus,” he said and the wand you had stolen flew from your hand to his, he caught it in the air with ease. It was surprising how fast he’d caught on to what you meant, but you already knew Barty was brilliant, even if he used said brilliance for evil deeds more often than not. 

“And now stun me.” 

“What? Are you daft? I’m trying to save you,” he protested with a frown.

“And this is my way of thanking you, you put up a fight against me. Stun me softly if you will–” 

“Stupefy!” 

Your body reeled back against the gate and ended up on the floor. It had been soft, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. Either way, the physical pain was a welcome distraction from the grief that threatened to consume you whole. 

“Payback for punching me in the face,” Barty said with a smile as he offered his hand. He was joking. 

You scoffed and pushed his hand away, deciding that sitting on the snow was comfortable enough. “Get the hell out before I punch you again.” 

His smile only grew wider and he had the nerve to send you a wink before he apparated again. You stared at the empty space he’d left for a while, there was snow all around. Falling and falling in a stunningly, slumbery sort of way. So peaceful and quiet in comparison to how loud and hectic things had been just seconds ago. Even your heartbeat, which had been blasting against your ears, was slowing down. 

You stared at the cold white snow, and let your head fall back onto the gate as one of your hands fell on it, pulling some of it up and staring at the way it fell from your fingers lazily. You remembered playing in the snow with the boys, how happy you had been that day, you wondered if you could ever be that happy again. 

Ah… how tired did you feel, things were calm now, you weren’t in danger anymore, you sank deeper into the ground, adrenaline dissipating with ease and exhaustion washing over you in waves. You closed and opened your eyes wearily. 

The shack, why did you have to get to the shack? You wondered, everything was so peaceful where you were, you liked it, the cold of the snow soothingly numbing the pain, all the pain, not just the physical one. You let a faint smile coat your lips, who’s that in the distance? You wondered, it looked like someone you knew, but paler. Could it be… Nina? 

And then you closed your eyes. 

And so we grace another table And raise our glasses one more time There's a face at the window And I ain't never, never sayin' goodbye…

Series Masterlist | Next Chapter

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A/N: This chapter is getting shadowbanned no matter what I change so please like, reblog and comment so it does not go under the radar. They're only flyin' too close to the sun

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[breadcat-xx]

When Harry first started attending Hogwarts, he and Regulus had come to an agreement.

As a professor, Regulus couldn’t afford to give Harry any special treatment just because he happened to be his son. Besides, the last thing Regulus wanted to do was ruin Harry’s years at Hogwarts by being overbearing and having an overt preference for him. That really wouldn’t do his social life any good.

Before he started his first year, Regulus had explained this to him, and Harry – being the bright little boy he was – had been very understanding about it. He knew that his father’s love for him was unconditional, and that nothing could ever change that.

So they’ve had this unspoken rule for years now, where at Hogwarts, Regulus is not dad but professor Black. He isn’t exactly happy to distance himself from his son, but it’s a necessary evil. And sometimes, when he is sure no one’s watching, he’s able to ruffle Harry’s wild curls or gently pull on his ear, which is usually met with a scrunched nose or eye-roll. Now that Harry’s older, the entire thing has become much easier. During his first year, Regulus had been able to tell how conflicting it was for him to be taught by his dad. And honestly, it had been uncomfortable for him too. But now, neither of them cringes anymore when Harry calls him professor. Regulus is in the middle of grading his fourth years’ essays, humming disapprovingly every now and again and scribbling notes on the parchment in red ink, when suddenly there’s a knock on the door to his personal quarters. He frowns. It’s past curfew, and he isn’t expecting anyone. Regulus pushes himself out of his chair and heads over to the door, and when he opens it, he’s startled to find Harry standing outside of it. He's holding onto his Invisibility Cloak, and Regulus can’t help but inwardly curse James. He’d told him not to give it to the boy, well aware of the rebellious streak he’d inherited from him, but James had insisted it was ‘part of the Hogwarts experience’.

“Harry.” Regulus tries hard to sound stern. “It’s past curfew.”

“I know.” Harry says, and Regulus immediately realises something’s off. “Look, don’t be angry with me, okay? Can I just… Can I come in?”

Regulus stares at him. Harry knows his quarters are off limits to students – including him. But as he stares at the teen’s face, he can tell something is bothering him. His eyes are red-rimmed and he’s visibly upset. He knows he shouldn’t allow him to enter, but he can’t stop his parental instincts from kicking in.

“Fine…” He takes a step back and Harry lets out a relieved noise.

As soon as he’s let him inside and the door is closed again, Harry launches himself at Regulus, wrapping his arms around him and hiding his face into his father’s chest. Regulus is taken aback by it, but easily reciprocates the hug.

“What’s wrong, love?” He whispers, running his fingers through Harry’s messy hair.

“Nothing…”

He can hear the tears in his son’s voice, and his heart breaks a little. He hums and hugs him tighter. It’s been a very long time since he was a teenager himself, but he can definitely recall the angst and overwhelming emotions that came with being one. Whatever it is that’s bothering Harry right now, it probably feels like the end of the world to him.

“I see…” Regulus leans back a little, just enough to be able to look at his son’s face. Harry sniffles, and leans into his touch when he wipes his cheeks dry.

“What about I put on the kettle?” Regulus offers. “Then we can talk about it… Or not, whatever you prefer.”

Harry nods sheepishly. Regulus directs him a gentle smile before ushering him to the sofa.

If there’s anything he's learned during his years as a professor and a father, it’s that a good cup of tea is hardly ever not part of the solution.  

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Pain (Part 3)

Regulus Black AU

Summary:   Losing everything that makes life worth living is the worst thing that can possibly happen. Is it possible to gain some of it back or is everything truly lost forever? Regulus’ life falls apart after losing his family. Moving on isn’t possible. Living each day is a curse, not a blessing. Sirius finally steps in to fix the problem but will Regulus and the reader be receptive?  

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Death, angst

Link to Part 2

Song at the beginning of the chapter: “Over my head” by The Fray

______

And suddenly I become a part of your past. I'm becoming the part that don't last. I'm losing you and it's effortless. Without a sound, we lose sight of the ground. In the throw-around, never thought that you wanted to bring it down. I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves. And everyone knows I'm in over my head, over my head. With eight seconds left in overtime. She's on your mind, she's on your mind

Once again Regulus found himself unable to move. You had been there...so close for him to touch. You were right in front of him reaching out to help and he shoved you away.

What the bloody hell have I done?

It was the only thought that Regulus could think. You had come back to him just as he had hoped and dreamed about. As usual, you were kind and gentle. You were being exactly what Regulus needed and yet he was a typical useless man.

All Regulus could see was the shocked and disappointed expression on your face. You had tried. Anyone would be able to agree to that. You tried valiantly to convince Regulus that is perfectly normal to still be grieving and he didn’t want to hear it. He didn’t want to hear that you had somehow pulled yourself together, reached out for help, and appeared to be a lot better off than him.

“There is no right way to grieve.”

Regulus sighed at the thought. You were trying to get him to see that he wasn’t a complete loser who had no idea how to process losing a wife and a child. It honestly seemed that you were trying to tell Regulus that you regretted how things ended between the two of you. As usual, he wasn’t listening…just like when Mila died and you begged him for a moment’s of attention. You had pleaded with Regulus for help…for attention…for anything and he didn’t have much to give.

“God damn it, I really ruin everything that I touch.”

Regulus grumbled before lying back on the couch. If he died at the moment, Regulus really wouldn’t mind at all…

(meanwhile)

You stood outside of Sirius’ door waiting for someone to answer. While you weren’t entirely shocked by Regulus’ reaction to your return you also weren’t truly prepared for it. Part of you didn’t blame him for telling you to leave. What kind of wife left her husband when both were clearly struggling with losing their only child? How heartless could you have been?

The other part, the part that had gone to therapy and listened, felt differently. You wanted Regulus to understand that you didn’t blame him. He didn’t know how to grieve just as you hadn’t. Neither of you truly knew how to process Mila’s death and perhaps parts of you still didn’t.

“It is normal to have emotions and push people that you typically wouldn’t away. You felt alone. In your state of mind, leaving was what made sense. You didn’t do anything wrong, Y/n. Your husband did nothing wrong. There is no right way to grieve death.”

Your therapist’s words were ever present in your mind. Those words were what kept you hanging on when you were feeling ready to give up on things. Getting help was what made you get through.

The door opening pulled you from your thoughts. Sirius immediately smile the moment that he saw you before pulling you into a long hug. Wrapping your arms around your former brother-in-law, you felt somewhat better. A hug was what you needed after what just happened.

“Hey! I was wondering when you would get here. How is it? Do you want me to go with you to talk to Regulus?”

You looked down as Sirius pulled away. Shaking your head, you finally brought your gaze up to his.

“I already tried and it didn’t go well. He told me that he never wanted to see me again.”

Sirius’ smile faded as he quietly muttered “damn it, Reg” under his breath. Moving out of the way, Sirius let you step inside.

“Damn it. I don’t know what he was thinking. I thought that seeing you would make him feel better.”

You followed Sirius into the kitchen. Sitting down, you fought the sudden urge to cry. You had never been much of a crier until Mila died. After your baby girl’s death, you found yourself crying daily. It could be about anything…Mila, losing Regulus, your poor decision to leave him, or even something simple as being out of milk for tea.

“He’s hurt, Sirius. I’m not entirely surprised by his reaction…I was just hoping for something different.”

Sirius began to make a cup of tea but decided to opt for fire whiskey instead. He poured two glasses before putting one down in front of you.

“So, what happened? I told him that I wrote to you and he actually looked thrilled. I thought the man would be ecstatic to see you.”

You took a sip of the fire whiskey before shrugging.

“Regulus is still clearly hurt by my decision to leave him…which I don’t him. I regret that decision too. I was stupid to do it.”

Sirius frowned. He reached over the table and took your hand in his.

“Love, you were both grieving something that no parent should ever have to go through. You did what you felt was best at the moment…”

“Because I was lonely…I’m even more lonely now. If I had stayed, I would have at least been able to take care of Regulus. He wouldn’t be in the state that he is in now.”

Sirius took a sip of his drink.

“Y/n, you don’t need to blame yourself. I understand that you feel it would have been best to stay and maybe it would or wouldn’t have been. I don’t know what the answer to that one is but what I do know is sometimes decisions that we make are the right ones….even if they don’t seem that way. You needed to take care of yourself to ever know how to take care of Regulus.”

You gave Sirius a small smile. That was exactly what you needed to hear. While you typically loved Sirius’ jovial sense of humor, he was also wonderful at giving great advice (when he wanted to).

“I only hope that someday he will be willing to speak to me again…before it’s too late. I don’t want to put him in the ground as we did with Mila.”

Sirius was quiet. He didn’t want to think of Regulus dying. His mind and heart couldn’t process it. Losing his niece was enough to make Sirius bat-shit scared of the subject of death.

“I’m doing everything that I can to keep him alive. I have become his nightmare. Once he gets himself straight, I think Regulus will want nothing more than to talk to you properly. You don’t go from being in love with someone since the age of 5 to totally turning it off.”

“One can only hope.”

You commented. Sirius gave you a small nod before running his hand through his hair.

“So, what are your plans? Are you going to stick around for a while?”

You shook your head. At the moment, you really saw no point. If you tried to talk to Regulus again, you had a feeling that he would be throwing hexes at you. It would probably be best to let Regulus come to you (even if you felt like it wasn’t the best idea).

“No, I think I will head back home. Regulus made himself clear and I don’t want to pressure him. When he’s ready to talk, you have my address.”

The next morning, Regulus woke up on the floor beside the couch. He wasn’t sure how much booze he had drunk the night before or how he ended up on the floor. Sitting up, Regulus rubbed the top of his head which was aching.

“Fucking hell, this is a nightmare. Y/n?”

Regulus could smell your perfume and something gave him hope that you were in the house somewhere. When no response came, Regulus looked down to see your cashmere scarf lying beside him. He had been pathetically cuddling your scarf like a security blanket in his sleep.

You really were there!

It wasn’t a drunken dream that would plague Regulus’ mind. Thinking about how he treated you came right back into his mind as all instructive cold thoughts typically did. Regulus quickly stood up and began looking for clean clothes.

“I can’t let her leave! I needed to fix this! I have to fix this.”

Regulus muttered to himself. He knew exactly where you would be. If he was lucky, you would have a sit-down and listen to his pathetic reasoning on why he was such a dick to you. Maybe, Regulus could get you to see how much he loved you.

“I’m sorry I was a shit husband and didn’t know that you were crying out for attention. You needed me and I wasn’t there for you as I was supposed to be. Please forgive me. We can work this out and be together as were are meant to be.”

That sounded like a good enough apology for the moment. Regulus didn’t even bother locking the door before apparating to Sirius’. He didn’t care if someone broke in and stole all that he had. At the moment, you were all that Regulus cared about.

Banging on Sirius’ door, Regulus was nearly ready to come unglued the moment his older brother answered.

“Hey, you actually came out of your house.”

Sirius said, looking honestly surprised. Regulus started at Sirius in slight shock for a moment before remembering why he was there.

“No time for niceties, Sirius. I need to see Y/n. I know that she came here. I have to talk to her.”

Sirius’ amused smirk vanished before he anxiously rubbed the back of his neck.

“She isn’t here, Regulus.”

Regulus’ face dropped and suddenly he looked like the depressed young man that he had been for a few years.

“What?”

Sirius sighed.

“She went back to New York, Regulus. She took the whole stay the fuck away from me thing that you said seriously.”

Regulus felt a panic attack building. You were gone! You were gone and Regulus blew whatever chance he had at finding you again. Sirius, seeing what was about to happen, reached out and grabbed Regulus by the shoulders.

“Hey, I have her address. We can go find her…okay? She left last night. We can go talk to her and maybe the two of you can fix this.”

Regulus didn’t say anything as he slowly nodded. Something told him that yet again he blew it. Yet again, he pushed you away and this could be for the very last time…

______

@amelie-black @justfinishthis @georgeweasleydumbhoe @acciosiriusblack @jessyballet @knreidy1 @siriuslyceleste @coffeeaddictednymph @millies0bsimp @fific7 @rogue-nyx88 @readtomeregulus @valvlry @daddyslittlevillain @panpride @saramaple @f4iryluvy @s-we-e-t-t-ea @i-love-scott-mccall @taylor-will-be-the-death-of-me @missgorldafirst @buttercup-beeee @padf00ts-l0ver @goldensunshineshit @haroldpotterson @aurorasnape12 @eclipsejune @mentally-unstable-hoe @quinis @lostarc24 @un-lovesherself @gugggu6gvai @jag9000 @lushour @play-morezeppelin @ravenhood2792 @dummybinch @bennyberry @rubyroscoe1 @mimisparkle12 @teletubiswszpilkach @criminalyetminimal @whymyparentscheckmyphone @lucasfilms77@spideyxalmighty @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @moldy-old-boot @hankypranky @summer-novak @emiwrites3reads @shaylybaby2032 @deanwherescas @shitfaceddaniel-blog @li0nh34rt @tas898 @knight-of-gleefulness @sprnaturallover @untoldshortsofthefandoms @wontlookaway @melaninnbarbie @marichromatic

[heloisedaphnebrightmore]

Heloise's 3.5k Followers Sleepover [Closed!] and Writing Challenge [Closed!]

Hello my lovelies <3

On Wednesday we reached another milestone once again! I can’t tell you how happy I am to know that so many of you have been enjoying my writing. All the support I’ve gotten from my followers has been beyond my expectations and I’m just so very grateful. I never imagined getting 50 let alone 3500 followers. Mind blowing really! I wanted to do something fun for such a huge milestone and as it’s a writing blog, I thought, let’s write. I want the writers to enjoy writing and the readers to enjoy reading. However, on the other hand, I didn’t want to leave out my non-writer followers so a sleepover should be in place as well.

Therefore, welcome to⁠—

Heloise’s 3.5k followers Sleepover and Writing Challenge

Part 1. Sleepover [Closed!] (Please click on the link above!)

Part 2. Writing Challenge [Closed!] (See below the Keep Reading option!)

Let's have fun and send your Ask! ^^

Heloise's Map | Masterlists

Heloise’s 3.5k Followers Writing Challenge Masterlist

Part 2. Writing Challenge!

Disclaimer! I do not own any of the prompts listed below, they all belong to @screnwriter and @dreamy-prose and each prompt list I have used for creating this event are listed at the bottom of the post. [Numbers] next to prompts refer to the prompt lists you can find them at.

Rules!

➵ You don’t have to follow me to participate, although it would be much appreciated. ➵ Chose as many prompts as you’d like. No limits. ➵ Write for any universe and any pairings, I basically read everything. ➵ No incest, racial, religious, or sexual hate openly, not related to the story line, but to hurt others. If you have any of the above in your fic, I will not reblog it. ➵ Fluff, angst, smut, anything goes, just please use appropriate Warnings!  ➵ Use the Keep reading option above 500 words. Tutorial from phone is Here! ➵ No deadline for submission, but deadline for entry closes on 27 September 2021. Clarification: You can submit your fics even next year if you wish. End date is only for entering the event. I will not be able to accept entries after 27 September 2021. ➵ If you would like to participate, just send me an Ask with the prompt(s) and character and Reblog this post. ➵ Please use the tag #heloises3.5kcelebration and tag my name @heloisedaphnebrightmore when you post your fic. If it's not reblogged in 48 hours, please send me an Ask or DM. My tags seem to be funny at times. ➵ And most importantly, Have fun! :)

I decided to use both Scenario prompts and Dialogue prompts to take on a different approach compared to my last writing challenge.

Scenario prompts

Enemies to lovers / Tension prompts

1. “I’ll kiss you right now to prove that I don’t feel anything for you.” “Okay.” The two characters kiss, and whoops they felt something, followed by lingering, as they’re catching their breath, trying to make sense of what just happened, and the feelings rushing through them, and then there’s this urge to dive back in for another kiss. [5]

@goddessofdawns (x) Loki Laufeyson x Reader

2. Your enemy has never let anyone touch their scar, until you come along. [7]

@natashxromanovf (x) Bucky Barnes x Reader

3. Character A and B kiss each other to prove there's nothing going on between them, but they get so caught up in each other, they prove the exact opposite. [2]

@wearywinchester (x) Dean Winchester x Reader

4. For one night, Character A and B give into temptation and sleep with each other, hoping it will solve the tension building between them. It does the opposite. [2]

5. Character A and B avoid each other after sharing an intimate moment, be it a kiss, a hug, holding hands, or just looking at each other's lips longer than appropriate. [1]

@wearywinchester (x) Dean Winchester x Reader

6. You're upset one night, and you don't know where to go, so you end up at your enemy's house, and as they open the door, you stay silent for a second, before saying “I don't know where else to go.” Your enemy doesn't say anything, instead they pull you into their arms, giving you a shoulder to cry on. [1]

@goddessofdawns (x) Bucky Barnes x Reader

7. The best friends to lovers “Let’s just kiss to see what it’s like.” They kiss, followed by the characters pulling away, eyes still closed, forehead against forehead, lingering… and then they go in for the second kiss. [5]

@goddessofdawns (x) Newt (Maze Runner) x Reader

8. You threaten your enemy, and when they close the distance between you, you realize how attracted you truly are to them. [1]

9. Pinning your enemy against the wall. Or straddling your enemy’s hips whilst they pin your arms above your head. [1]

@theravenclawgal (x) Sirius Black x Reader

10. You end up on your enemy's lap, and you yank the belt from their pants “Let's just get this over with.” [1]

11. You're about to leave the room, but your enemy slams the door shut, and with one hand on either side of your head, barricade you against the wall... (cue the reckless make-out session). [2]

@band--psycho (x) James Potter x Reader

12. You’re sharing a bed with your enemy and being told “Stay on your side or I'll set this whole bed on fire”. Only to wake up the next day with your enemy's arms wrapped around you. [2]

@forever-and-more (x) Lorcan Salvaterre (Throne of Glass) x Reader

13. Your enemy has been badly wounded, and somebody needs to bandage them up, so you agree to help them, and suddenly they're shirtless, and you can't help but admire their body, something that cheeky bastard takes notice of. [1]

14. You've been wounded, your face is all bruised up. Your enemy puts a finger under your chin, bringing your eyes to theirs, asking “Who did this to you?”. When you don't answer, they ask you again “Who did this to you?”. [1]

@band--psycho (x) Klaus Mikaelson x Reader

@grimdevil (x) Regulus Black x Reader

15. You've just been hurt, you're bleeding out, and your enemy is freaking out, dropping the “I love you. I can't lose you” card, begging you not to close your eyes. [2]

@goddessofdawns (x) Loki Laufeyson x Reader

@forever-and-more (x) Lorcan Salvaterre (Throne of Glass) x Reader

16. Two characters look at each other, a tense silence between them and then bang, lips crash into each other as they can’t resist anymore and then one of them pins the other against the wall. [6]

@forever-and-more (x) Lorcan Salvaterre (Throne of Glass) x Reader

17. You had a really good time on the date tonight, and your date is asking for a good night kiss. It was only meant to be on the cheek, but then you pull back, our eyes meet, and there's a gravitational pull pulling you closer again. [6]

18. You’ve never been kissed before so your friend volunteers, but you decline because you’ve been best friends and it would be weird. But a couple hours later you lay awake in bed and can't stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss them and suddenly you regret what you said. [6]

@queen-of-brokenhearts (x) Hermione Granger x Female!Reader

Intimate / Domestic prompts

19. You are wearing your lover’s clothes when they say, “Can I get my shirt/hoodie back?” and you say “No.” or “Come and get it.”. [4]

@oliverwoodmarrymepls (x) Oliver Wood x Reader

20. You're talking on the phone and your lover quietly comes up behind you, wraps their arms around you, and starts gently kissing your neck. You begin to lose focus on your phone call as you concentrate on not making any noise. [3]

@band--psycho (x) Fred Weasley x Reader

21. You’re supposed to be mad at your lover but they’re holding your face and smiling, and you just can't resist it when they're pouting like that. [6]

22. You and your lover sitting next to each other at a table, and they rest their hand on your thigh, gently rubbing their thumb back and forth. [3]

23. Looking at your crush or lover only to find them already looking at you and when you make eye contact, they smile at you. [3]

@iliveiloveiwrite (x) - Benedict Bridgerton x Reader

24. You think mistletoe kisses are lame, but your love interest brings you under one, regardless of the season and suddenly you're all for it. [6]

25. You and your lover are in bed, when you say, “It’s time to get up.” and your lover pulls you back down, wraps their hands around your body, snuggles up close, preventing you from getting out of bed. [4]

26. Your lover is resting their head on your lap, falling asleep whilst you are playing with their hair. [4]

@oliverwoodmarrymepls (x) Oliver Wood x Reader

@band--psycho (x) Young!Remus Lupin x Reader

27. Having a piece of hair brushed off your face as you're reading or looking down. [3]

28. You're sick, and you can't kiss your lover, and it's an absolute torture. [6]

@msmarvelouswinchester (x) Jensen Ackles or Dean Winchester x Reader

29. Being asked “Are you sure?” (There's nothing sexier than consent) [3]

30. When it’s a slow burn, and the characters just look at each other like “Fuck it, I’m done with this.” and they finally kiss. [4]

@acourtofbooksandfantasy (x) Azriel (ACOTAR) x Reader

Dialogue prompts

Flirty / Sarcastic prompts

1. “Well, I guess it’s a good thing I like the sound of your voice, because you don’t seem to ever shut up.” [9]

2. “Is that a challenge?” [9]

3. “You’re cute when you’re nervous.” [15]

@will-be-a-fineline (x) Harry Styles x reader

4. “When have I ever put you in danger? Actually, don't answer that.” [11]

@wearywinchester (x) Dean Winchester x Reader

5. “I dare you.” [9]

6. “If you don’t shut up, I might as well kiss you to put that mouth to good use.” [9]

7. Character A: “Do yourself a favour, get laid.” Character B: “Why, are you offering?” [9]

@grimdevil (x) Draco Malfoy x Reader

@theravenclawgal (x) Sirius Black x Reader

8. Character A: “What if bite you?” Character B: “I’m into that.” [10]

9. Character A is returning a priced procession to Character B and says, “I want something in return.” Character B “What?”  Character A “You.” [2]

10. Character A: “What changed your mind? “ Character B: “You.” [7]

11. Character A: “What do you want?” Character B: “You.” [9]

12. Character A: “Just admit it.” Character B: “Admit what?” Character A: “I’m the best you’ve ever had.” [13]

13. Character A: “You haven’t listened to a word I’ve said, have you?” Character B: “And yet for some reason your mouth just keeps on going.” [8]

@wearywinchester (x) Dean Winchester x Reader

@theravenclawgal (x) Sirius Black x Reader

14. Character A: “I shouldn't have kissed you” “ Character B: You're right. But I should've.” [7]

15. Character A: “Do you flirt with everyone?” Character B: “Unfortunately, you’re the only one who caught my attention.” Character A: “Unfortunately?” [8]

@sexysirius (x) Sirius Black x Reader

16. Character B: “I like to keep my options open.” [8]

17. “I hate you. Oh, I hate you so much right now.” [11]

18. “Jesus Christ, you're annoying.” [11]

First kiss / Confession prompts

19. Character A: “Come over here.” Character B: “Why?” Character A: “You said you’ve never been kissed before. I’m planning on changing that.” [10]

20. Character A: “Just… don’t make this weird, all right?” Character B: “Meaning what?” Character A: “Meaning, don’t treat me like I haven’t been kissed before.” Character B: “But you… haven’t been kissed before.” Character A: “Look, I just want this over and done with, okay. I don’t want to be treated like a delicate flower. Kiss me like you mean it.” [10]

@band--psycho (x) Damon Salvatore x Reader

21. Character A: “I love you.” Character B: “I know.” Character A: “You knew?” Character B: “You haven’t exactly been discreet.” [15]

@band--psycho (x) Natasha Romanoff x Reader

22. “Listen, I know you’re busy, but… it’s important.” [15]

23. “I love you, and I don’t care if you don’t love me back. I just need you to know that I do.” [15]

24. Character A: “Do you have feelings for me?” Character B: “What?” Character A: “Do you have feelings for me?” [14]

25. “Is that truly, all it is? Just, two friends, hanging out?” [14]

@pregnant-piggy (x) Sirius Black x Reader

26. “I need to ask you something and I don’t want you to brush off the subject or turn it into a joke… I need you to be honest with me.” [14]

@grimdevil (x) Young!Sirius Black

27. “Are you… are you in love with me?” [14]

28. “I can’t stop thinking about you.” [14]

29. “All this time I thought you didn’t want me.” [14]

30. “If there’s something you want to tell me, now’s the time.” [14]

@wearywinchester (x) Dean Winchester x Reader

31. “There’s nothing going on between me and Character C. because the person I want to be with is standing right in front of me.” [14]

32. Character A: “I want this to work. I really do.” Character B: “Then we’re on the same page.” [16]

33. “I’ve missed you so much. I didn’t even think it was possible to miss someone this much.” [16]

34. “I know we're not together, but I might die today so I'm going to kiss you just in case there is no later.” [6]

Reassurance / Sweet prompts

35. “You could stay here, tonight. For as long as you'd like.” [7]

@oliverwoodmarrymepls (x) Oliver Wood x Reader

36. “Could you ever love someone like me?” [7]

37. Character A: “I've never been in love before.” Character B: “Then let me show you.” [7]

@goddessofdawns (x) Sam Wilson x Reader

38. “I can’t get up. You’re gonna have to carry me.” [11]

@goddessofdawns (x) Sam Wilson x Reader

39. “Are you okay with me kissing you?” [12]

@deanwanddamons (x) Jensen Ackles x Reader

40. “I feel safe with you. I always have.” [12]

@band--psycho (x) Newt (Maze Runner) x Reader

41. “I need you to know that you can always come to me.” [12]

@iliveiloveiwrite (x) - Benedict Bridgerton x Reader

42. Character A: “You’ll wait for me?” Character B: “For as long as I need to.” [12]

43. “I’ll always be there for you. Don’t you ever doubt that.” [12]

@band--psycho (x) George Weasley x Reader

44. “Don’t hide from me. you’re even more beautiful in the morning.” [13]

@will-be-a-fineline (x) Harry Styles x reader

45. “I’m going to kiss you until you’re sick of it.” [13]

@goddessofdawns (x) Sam Wilson x Reader

46. “Just hold me. I’m not ready to wake up.” [13]

@pregnant-piggy (x) Sirius Black x Reader

If you have any questions, don’t be afraid of sending me a message. My inbox is always open for everyone :)

Prompt lists used from @screnwriter and @dreamy-prose

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16]

[omgrachwrites]

The Princess and The Duke - Chapter Fourteen

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Summary: As the Princess of Spain, you were always supposed to marry King James of England to make an alliance between Spain and England. When he marries a woman at his court for love, you are married off to his best friend, Sirius Black the Duke of Bedford to keep the alliance. However, the court is riddled with secrets and a rebel in the North starts to rise against the Throne. Royal AU.

Warnings: fluff, angst, James and Lily being adorable

Words: 2666

Disclaimer: The Spanish may be wrong and these gifs don’t belong to me!

Translations: lo prometo - I promise

Gracias, eres una maravilla - Thank you, you’re wonderful

A/N: This is a formal apology for the next chapter :( I’m so sorry again, the Spanish in this was used with Google Translate so I’m so sorry if it’s wrong! Hope you guys enjoy this and please let me know what you think and let me know if you would like to be tagged! I love you all! xxx

Chapter Fourteen - Beware of The City

It seemed like good looks ran in the family, Regulus’ face was alight with joy, happiness burning in his eyes as he met his niece and nephew, it was the first time that you’d brought them to see him. He was looking quite well, he’d been so gravely injured that James wouldn’t allow anyone to see him – not even Sirius – he was worried that visitors would make Regulus’ condition worse.

As soon as James deemed Regulus fit enough to see people, you and Sirius were there in a flash, Sirius had barely left his side and you were proud of how much of a good brother Sirius was. Sirius grinned up at you, almost turning your legs to jelly in the process, and you combed your fingers through his inky black hair that was beginning to get long again and he sweetly pressed his lips against your cheek.

“Elena and Johnathan really are so beautiful, Y/N, they obviously take after you in that respect,” he smirked, glancing over at his older brother.

Instead of acting offended, Sirius simply inclined his head in a nod, “they certainly do take after their beautiful mother,” he cupped your cheek as he turned to look at you. There was so much adoration and love swimming in his eyes that butterflies fluttered in the pit of your stomach as your breath was momentarily stolen away. God, you loved him so much, every day you were thankful for him.

Blushing, you averted your eyes to the grey stone floor, “God, if you two keep saying things like that then I’m afraid my head will get so large that it won’t even be able to fit through that door,” you giggled, gesturing to the golden arched doorway behind you. The two brothers laughed as Sirius kissed along your knuckles, lacing his fingers through yours.

The thud of hesitant footsteps against the stone floor captured your attention and you saw the easy smile slide of Sirius’ face and it drained of colour. Almost at once, the atmosphere in the room switched from something that was very happy and light, to something stifling and tense. You turned around to see James lingering in the doorway, he shot an apologetic look at Regulus and you could feel Sirius tense behind you, it was time.

“I’m so sorry to break this up, but the court is assembled.”

Regulus nodded as he forced a smile at you and Sirius as he passed the twins back to you, “you don’t have to do this, Reg,” Sirius sighed and you could hear the pain in his voice, you wished that you could take it all away.

“Sirius is right, Reg.”

Regulus shook his head as he got out of bed, wincing as he did so, rejecting Sirius’ silent offer to help, “I have to, the court needs to know, I’ll be fine, lo prometo,” he assured you in Spanish, forcing out a tight smile. He was much too noble. You and Sirius both exchanged a worried glance as you followed Regulus out of the chambers that he was currently residing in.

The atmosphere in The Throne Room was thick and the tension was only building as a hushed whisper fell across the room. Lucius Malfoy gave Regulus a murderous stare as he approached the throne, James and Lily looked nervous and rightfully so. Regulus didn’t seem to notice, in fact, he walked with his head held high.

“Regulus,” James started, “when the palace guards saw that you were hurt and went to get you some help, this bag was found with your possessions and you mentioned the importance of it,” James frowned, looking weary and you wondered if this great responsibility was exhausting him yet. He held up a small satin pouch that was tied with drawstrings, “can you tell me what’s inside?”

Regulus inclined his head, “certainly, Your Majesty. They are seals of nobility of houses that associate with Lord Voldemort, the rumours are true. He wasn’t killed as a child like we were told by our parents and grandparents,” there was a gasp and again, a hushed whisper rippled through the court. Dread ran through your veins like ice, “regretfully during my time in Cumbria, I could only accumulate a couple of seals before I could get away with my life.”

James nodded as he sat down on his magnificent golden throne, his Queen at his side and he pulled open the bag, “whoever is in league with this Lord Voldemort will be imprisoned for treason and you will spend the rest of your life rotting in prison,” he cleared his throat and pulled out a piece of parchment and his eyes hardened, “Malfoy.”

Lucius Malfoy only sneered as the guards came to arrest him, “long live the King!” he shouted sarcastically as he was led away.

“Mulciber, Lestrange, Rossier, Crabbe, Goyle.”

As the King called out the names of the traitors, they were arrested one by one. Some of the men went silently, some begged for their lives, trying to appeal to James’ good nature. You shuddered as a chill ran down your spine as you held your children closer. It was an awful thing to hear someone beg for their life. It had truly been the worst day; you wished you were back in France – or Spain – beneath the warm sun without a care in the world.

James sighed as he turned to address the court and Sirius pulled you close and you kissed his cheek, he was the light in all of this darkness, “the penalty for treachery will be imprisonment, perhaps even death,” you were shocked at his words but you knew that he had to keep his Kingdom safe, “I will not be made a fool of! Thank you, Regulus for bringing this to our attention.”

“If you permit me to return to Cumbria, Your Majesty, I will be able to get you more names.”

Before James could reply, Sirius spoke up and you heard the panicked tone in his voice, “you can’t! He’ll kill you, Regulus, I-I can’t lose you!” pain and worry flashed across Sirius’ handsome face, his voice growing thick. Your heart clenched as you saw your husband in such turmoil.

Regulus bit his lip as he glanced at his worried brother and he placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, “I’ll be fine, he won’t kill me because I’m going to blame this on someone else, someone who is so evil that they deserve to die.”

Almost instantly, Sirius’ face transformed into a sneer as his soft grey eyes grew hard, “it seems like you’ve got it all figured out,” he scoffed as he shook his head as he stormed out of The Throne Room.

Regulus gazed after his brother with a pained expression as he ran a hand over his tired face, “I’ll go after him, Reg,” you wanted to help so you offered him a small smile as you passed your children to Remus, and his wife, Mary,” he didn’t mean it, he’s just scared. We all are, everything will be okay.”

Regulus grinned at you weakly as he brushed a knuckle against your cheek, “Gracias, Y/N, eres una maravilla,” you were distracted as you spoke to Regulus so you didn’t notice someone hurry after your husband.

You sighed as you made your way down the castle hallways, it was a beautiful day outside, and it was such a contrast compared to the horror that had unfolded in The Throne Room. It was then that you heard her soft voice; it was amazing how far the sound travelled.

“I’m so sorry about your brother, Sirius, you’re both so brave,” Marlene’s voice was so breathy that it made your blood boil. He was your husband.  

You quickly rounded the corner and saw red, feeling sick and angry, you were so angry. Marlene had her hands placed against Sirius’ chest and she brushed her lips against Sirius’. Instantly, Sirius pushed her away with a frown, “what the hell do you think you’re doing? I love Y/N and my family more than anything, I wouldn’t jeopardise that!” his rejection filled you with relief that almost eclipsed your anger.

When Marlene scoffed, you lost your temper, “how dare you?!”

Sirius and Marlene both turned to look at you with wide eyes, as soon as Marlene saw you, a look of boredom flashed across her face, while Sirius looked devastated as his eyes filled with tears.

“Y/N,” he choked.

“I graciously gave you a job! And you betray me, going behind my back to seduce my husband!” you pointed a finger at her angrily, you felt like a crazed woman but you didn’t care, “get out of my sight, you’re dismissed! I never want to see you again!” Marlene scowled at you as she shook her head and walked away.

“Y/N,” all of your anger dissipated when you saw the tears streaming down Sirius’ cheeks and you felt tears sting at your own eyes. Marlene was exactly the kind of woman that you imagined Sirius would be with if he hadn’t had to marry you, “she kissed me, I didn’t do anything, I didn’t want her to kiss me,” his face was pleading as he reached for you. You flinched slightly from his touch and his face crumpled as he choked on his tears, “I love you.”

You nodded, hot tears streaming down your cheeks, an unbearable ache in your chest, “I love you too, I know that you pushed her away, I don’t blame you, my darling,” it was true but you just couldn’t get the image out of your head.

-----------------------------------------------

2 Years Later:

The pitter patter of little feet running down the hallway – the twins giggled as they chased each other – made Sirius grin. Elena and Johnathan were growing up so fast; they had the complexion and beauty of their mother, with their father’s thick hair and stormy grey eyes. Sirius grinned at his wife who looked like a Queen in golden robes and flowers in her long flowing tresses of hair. When Y/N spotted Sirius gazing at her lovingly, she lightly smacked his arm as a light melodic giggle escaped her lips.

Things had been going well between them, they had been rocky for a little while after Y/N had walked in on Marlene kissing him in that deserted hallway. Sirius was still devastated by the memory, Y/N had been heart broken and he was partly to blame. Though, they worked through their difficult feelings and were stronger than ever.

“You look so beautiful, Y/N” Sirius smiled as he reached down and laced their fingers together.

Y/N grinned up at him, her eyes sparkling and her cheeks flushed a pretty colour, “you don’t look so bad yourself,” she smirked and raised an eyebrow as her gaze flickered down to Sirius’ lips.

Sirius chuckled and cupped Y/N’s cheeks as she pulled him into a deep kiss, her tongue tracing the seam of his lips before pulling away. Sirius missed the warmth of his wife’s lips and he tried to follow her lips with his which made her giggle and she pressed a teasing kiss against his nose. The twins giggle caught Sirius’ attention again and he sighed happily, shaking his head.

“Slow down, you two!”

Johnathan whined, “Papa!” while Elena pouted as her eyes went round.

“God, that’s your trick when you don’t get what you want.”

Y/N laughed as she leaned her head on his shoulder, it was a nice warm weight and her hair smelled of citrus, “moral of the story is to give me everything I want,” she teased as they caught up with the twins.

Both Elena and Johnathan were so excited, Lily and James had invited them – along with Remus, Mary and Peter – to an intimate banquet. Sirius vaguely wondered what the occasion was. As soon as they walked into the banquet hall, Sirius heard Y/N take a sharp intake of breath and Sirius could see why. Over a dozen flickering candles filled the diamond encrusted chandelier that created a warm orange glow. The spread looked absolutely amazing, Sirius almost expected the velvet covered table to groan beneath the weight. Beautiful golden tapestries lined the walls and Sirius had to wonder if this was some sort of celebration.

Elena and Johnathan ran full force at James and Lily who laughed as they lifted them into their arms, “hello, you two,” James grinned before looking over at Sirius and Y/N, “you look great guys.”

Y/N smiled as she waved back, “thank you! So do you,” that was when Sirius noticed that Lily looked amazingly happy and there was a glow to her cheeks.

Sirius smiled as he greeted Remus, Mary and Peter, “do you three know why we’re here? And why the Hall is decorating like something out of a portrait?”

Remus shook his head as he wrapped his arms around Mary, his hand resting on her pregnant belly, “I’ve got no clue, they just asked us to be here.”

Y/N grinned and let out a wistful sigh, “I think I know why we’re here.”

There were so many courses of wonderful food, the flavours danced across Sirius’ tongue and he groaned quietly, blushing when Y/N smirked at him. Sirius expected James and Lily to tell them why they were here straight away but by the time the dessert was served he was still none the wiser. He couldn’t stand the anticipation for much longer.

“So, why are we here?” Sirius smiled as he wiped the food from Elena’s face.

James and Lily exchanged bright and happy looks, “okay, I suppose we can tell you now. We wanted our closest friends to be the first ones to find out,” James grinned as he lovingly kissed his wife on the lips.

“We’re going to have a baby!” they said in unison and for a split second there was silence before everyone began talking over one another.

“Congratulations, I’m so happy for you two!” Y/N squealed as she pulled Lily into a hug, “you are just going to be the best parents!”

Remus shook James’ hand with a teasing smile on his face, “another James running around, how will we ever survive?”

Sirius laughed as a happy feeling ballooned in his chest as he pulled his friend into a hug, James’ hazel eyes looked teary as Sirius pulled away. He knew that they had been trying for a baby for so long and they deserved to be parents, “they’re going to be so loved!” he was so incredibly happy for his best friends, it would be great for Elena and Johnathan to grow up with another child.

The mood was jovial and happy as dessert was finished off and Sirius made a toast, “I can’t quite believe that you two are going to have a baby, and we couldn’t be happier! To baby Potter!”

“To baby Potter!” everyone laughed and clinked their glasses together; the smile never left James and Lily’s faces.

Unfortunately, the happy mood couldn’t last long because when the dishes were being cleared away, The Captain of the Guard came running in. His face was worried and a pang of worry filled Sirius’ chest.

“Your Majesty! The prisoners, the traitors have escaped!” a gasp filled the room and regret filled James’ face. He had chosen not to kill the traitors so to keep their families compliant and in good faith. Lord Voldemort had been rather quiet for the past two years, in England at least, he’d been causing terror all over Europe and Sirius was worried that he was gathering more followers to knock James off his throne. Voldemort believed that he was the real heir to the throne.

Sirius bit his lip as he looked at Y/N whose eyes were filled with worry and she squeezed Sirius’ hand; he knew that she was thinking the same thing that he was. With the followers of Voldemort out of prison, what did that mean for Regulus?

-----------------------------------------------

@smiithys @elayneblack @amelie-black​ @siriuslyjanhvi​ @pregnant-piggy​ @lindatreb​ @mabelle-cherie​ @hxrgreeves​ @britishspidey​ @mads-bri​ @classicrocketqueen​ @sxtansqueen​ @hufflepuffzutara​ @missmulti​ @bruxa0007​ @ourstarsailor​ @fific7​ @galwithbluethoughts​ @2410slb​ @sunles​ @krismeunicornbaobei​ @theincredibledeadlyviper​ @deathkat657​ @lonegryffindor2005​

[hp-imagines-07]

Only You

Sirius Black x Fem!Gryffindor!MuggleBorn!Reader

Universe: Harry Potter; The Marauders era

Type: fluffy and ANGST (but with a happy ending, u'll love it, i swear)

Summary: [y/n] and Sirius' relationship is in danger... the request really

Request: YES|no - "Great so the idea I had was a Sirius x reader - regulus threatens the reader and says he will hurt Sirius or whatever if reader doesn’t break up with him . the reader doesn’t tell anyone and don’t listen to begin with then something happens so she feels she has no choice . Sirius is suspicious since lily told him that the reader said he is the one and also the fact she is avoiding everyone . Find out about it when they see regulus threaten reader and then Convinces the reader to get back together. Also the reader is muggle born." @rebsx​ thank you for the perfect request, hope you cry with me at the sad parts

Prompt: xxx

Warnings: cursing probably, heartbreak in slowburn(?) and threats maybe

Song: xxx

Word Count: 5.6K (i can't believe it's this big, i swear it wasn't my intention)

Posted: 28th of September 2020

A/N: i'm sorry that i took so long to write it... but i really hope you like it as much as i loved it (probably my best work until now)

My Others Accounts: @imagines-07 (Principal Account) | @obx-imagines-07 (Outer Banks) | @mcu-imagines-07 (Marvel Comics Universe) | @stit-imagines-07 (Stranger Things & IT) | @cm-imagines-07​ (Criminal Minds)

MY MASTERLIST

"See you after Charms, my love." Sirius says and kisses [y/n]'s forehead, before pecking her lips and walking away to his next class. She just smiles to herself and starts to walk up the stairs to the Fat Lady Portrait, going to spend her free period reading a book or doing nothing alone in the common room.

Having free periods like this are the worse, [y/n] can't even spend time with her boyfriend or any of her friends because she was the lucky one to have a free period on the last class of Wednesday while all of them were on Charms together.

As she was getting to the next staircase, it decided to change with all of the other ones. Her eyes rolled when the entrance of the Gryffindor common room just got more and more distant, and then she saw something weird...

Slytherins. Wait, not just ordinary Slytherins or one of the ones she shares tables at Potions, but Blacks. Regulus was in front of the other ones, walking down the stairs with Narcissa and Bellatrix just behind him. All that [y/n] was wishing was that the stairs they were while staring at her, wasn't going to meet with the one she was at. But luck wasn't by her side.

[y/n]'s hands held her up by holding the handrail at her right when the stairs stopped moving - even after 6 years, she couldn't get used to it - and her eyes founded the three Slytherins at the same staircase as her, going down the stairs with light steps that she wouldn't be able to listen if she wasn't looking at them.

'What in bloody hell would a Slytherin be doing at this part of the castle?'

[y/n] shook her head and all the weird thoughts went directly to the back of her mind, where they should stay and never get out. Her feet started to bring her up the long stairs she still had to walk to get to the common room and even with her huge and heavy bag filled with books of all the classes [y/n] had today, her legs were moving fast. It was probably the need to stay away from a few people that just hated her existence and stay in a safe place, but just maybe...

As they walked straight to each other, [y/n] could feel her heart beating at her throat and ears, chills going up and down her arms and legs, and a weird feeling in the deepest part of her heart. Her gut was screaming to her that something was off and that she should get to the common room as fast as her legs could take her up the almost infinity stair.

And with the fact that the unique people that she could see all around her were the Black cousins, [y/n] knew they were up to something. And just the thought that they were up to something while looking at her, made her hands cold and sweat and her knees feel weak.

As they finally got to each other, Regulus just took his hand out of his pocket and stopped you with a warning hand in front of your chest without even the need to touch you. [y/n]'s face turned towards them and the three of them were already looking at her with their characteristic expressions.

Regulus had one of his eyebrows raised and the corner of his lips that, if you squinted your eyes really hard, you could notice that it was a little upwards in a sly smirk. Narcissa had her serious face, without the slightest of emotion letting through her face, and even her eyes were as deep as the end of a maze can be. And Bellatrix had her wide smile, that could stay in any child's worst nightmares, with her big eyes as wide as her smile was.

"Uhm, hello?" [y/n] said with a delicate voice, just above a whisper, but even this low, she showed confidence. It doesn't matter if the girl was dying on the inside, she would never let anyone - especially them - know that they got under her skin. Never...

"We need to have a little chat with you, sister-in-law." It was Regulus strong and deep voice that cut the insides of her ears in fear with his sarcasm while using the nickname.

"Spill." Sirius' girlfriend said and crossed her arms across her chest, in a position of authority while she pretended to not notice Bellatrix's eyes that went directly to her bobs and the way the girl was shifting on her foot.

"The thing is that it's kinda complicated what I have to say to you. But it is an order from my parents, so I will have to say it in any way..." Regulus started and [y/n]'s left eyebrow raised without her even think about it and her right hand moved to put his hand down. "So, I need you to break up with my big brother."

The words seemed so funny that [y/n] tried she really tried to not laugh at it, but a chuckle got out from the back of her throat as the sentence hit her.

"Excuse you?"

"I am serious. And I didn't want to get in details, but my mother says that you are a terrible influence for Sirius and that you can't date him." Regulus explained to [y/n] but her head just shook in disbelief.

"Look, I'm so sorry to disappoint you. But if you think that I'm going to break up with the boy I love, all of you are dumber than what I thought you were." [y/n] said and started to walk upstairs again, just wanting to go back to her dorm or the common room and read the book Remus gave to her last weekend. "Thank you for your attention, but I won't."

"Ok, do whatever you want to do," Regulus said and his cousins looked at him with surprised faces, probably not expecting the way he accepted [y/n]'s decision. "But I should warn you that, my mother's orders were to do something with Sirius if you just decided to not listen to us. And that's what I will do." Your body froze five steps upwards the one he was in and four from the girls. "So, I am giving you until Friday. You have two days to break his little heart, or we will hurt him physically and we won't hesitate."

[y/n] gulped loudly with the words of the brother of her boyfriend and felt her fingers starting to shake. No, they wouldn't do this to Sirius... His own family? No, they couldn't. Right?

The thing was that she didn't know the answer and was afraid to find out.

-

Friday.

It was finally Friday and [y/n] didn't have the guts to break up with Sirius. She just couldn't.

And since the threaten, she has had a billion eyes to look out for Sirius. Every single second that he was away from her, she was worried sick about him, and all of their friends noticed the way that [y/n] couldn't stay mere seconds without her boyfriend, or she would start to freak out and look for him at every corner of the castle. [y/n] got paranoid when it was still Thursday.

And now, at her last class of Friday, she couldn't bring herself to change her gaze from Sirius to the professor, neither pay attention to the new subject. Lily's eyes were focused on her since the start of class, but [y/n] didn't even notice the redheaded strong gaze on her. And it was worrying Lily.

As the professor dismissed everyone, Lily ran behind [y/n] like a lost puppy, that was already outside the classroom looking around her like a mad man.

"Hi, babes. Can I talk to you?" Lily's voice was the sweetest she had ever heard but [y/n] still jumped scared with the sudden voice.

"Sorry, I can talk right now..." The other girl said and tried to turn around and run - probably to Sirius - but before she could breathe a little bit far from her best friend, Lily held her wrist and didn't say a word while she brought [y/n] to another corridor, an empty and quiet one. "What are you doing, Lily? I said I can't talk right now!" [y/n] hissed at her but Lily just rolled her eyes at the stubborn girl.

"Look, you've been acting weird since your free period on Wednesday, but today you're looking like you're paranoid. What's going on?" Lily asked with an expression of empathy and held both of [y/n]'s hands on hers, softly caressing her best friend's hands with her thumbs. "You can tell me."

[y/n]'s shoulders started to relax under her friend's warm touch, she felt her tense forehead starting to release of this tension and her vision being blurred by tears as she realized what she had gotten into. "I- I..." She didn't know how to tell for Lily about what [y/n] have been feeling lately, it was just too much to take care of alone. And then she let herself open up to her best friend, because if there was anyone that would listen to [y/n], was Lily. "I don't know how to say this, but-" Her weak voice was rudely stopped with a loud noise coming from a corridor close to the one they were on.

'Sirius!'

[y/n] ran away from Lily as fast as her legs could take her tired body from all the sleepless nights since Wednesday and the redheaded one followed just behind her friend with plenty question marks flying around her head.

As they got to the corridor, there were confused, scared and disgusted people with what was happening. [y/n] excused herself and passed through everyone that was on her way to the middle of the circle while people sent her rough looks.

When [y/n]'s eyes met Sirius, she felt the air finally coming back to her lungs, the color of the world coming back to her vision and the control of her moves coming back to her brain, with the view of Sirius completely fine.

"Oh, my Godric Gryffindor. What happened?" Lily's voice beside [y/n] brought her back to reality and she noticed Peter with a broken arm, just at Sirius' left.

"W-We don't know..." Remus said and fell on his knees to help Wormtail to stay up, when he noticed no one was going to help him, he looked around with raised eyebrows. "A little help here?"

James and Sirius didn't wait a second to help their friend in need and in a few seconds all of you were taking Peter to Madam Pomfrey.

[y/n] and Lily were holding Peter's broken arm in the air, so it wouldn't hurt any more with any touch or sudden move, while James carried Peter by his left side, Remus by his right and Sirius was guiding them while holding Peter's waist to make sure he wasn't going to fall.

"Don't worry, Wormtail. You're not going to die." Sirius said joking and just James laughed.

"What? I'm gonna die?"

"Nah, don't worry about it, Pete. It's just a broken arm." James said back but Peter's eyes just got bigger and as he turned his eyes to look at his arm, Remus put one of his hands on his friend's eyes before he could look at his arm in a position that it shouldn't be. Well, if looks could kill, Prongs would be six feet underground just by the glance Moony gave to him. "Sorry..." He whispered back and focused on trying to hold Peter on his feet.

As soon as Madam Pomfrey saw them, she thanked for their help, said that what they did was smart - bringing Peter to her directly and not trying to solve this by themselves - and asked for all of them to wait outside.

"My love," Sirius called [y/n] the same moment the both of them stepped out of the room. "can I talk to you for a second?" He asked and she just nodded as an answer while he held her hand in his and brought her to as far as they friends couldn't hear them. A second before Sirius could open his mouth to say what he wanted, [y/n] jumped on him.

Her arms hugged his neck and her forehead rested on his shoulder, it took a little bit to Sirius understand what was happening but not even a second after, he hugged her back with such as love and caring as she was.

He couldn't actually understand what was happening and even with [y/n/n] loving to hug him at all the times she could, Sirius knew there was something else there. "Hey, what is all this for?" He asked a few seconds later in the embrace and when he felt [y/n] starting to release her tight grip on him because of his question, his arms just held her body closer to his (if that was possible).

"I don't know... I was just worried that you were the hurt one." [y/n]'s voice was just above a whisper and Sirius felt his heart clench with the worry and sadness on her delicate voice.

"Well, I'll just let you worry because it was almost me.." Sirius trailed off and [y/n] felt her whole world stop as she sank the words in. She raised her head to look on Sirius' eyes and hoping to find that little glow from when he was joking or pranking someone. But it wasn't there. "The spell hit Peter because he accidentally stumbled and ended up in front of me..."

Oh, no...

"Sirius... I need to tell you something." That was it, [y/n] was going to tell him how his family was threatening her to break up with him or they would hurt him. This was going to end now. But then she saw him. [y/n] saw Regulus behind a group of people looking at her like he could read her mind - well, maybe he could... He knew she was going to tell Sirius about it. But she couldn't, or they would hurt him. "I-I-I..." She looked back at Sirius' gorgeous face, filled with love and empathy towards her. [y/n] couldn't do it. When her eyes looked at her feet she did it... "Sirius, I-I want to b-break up..."

-

Three days, eight hours, twenty-five minutes and ten seconds.

It's been three days, eight hours, twenty-five minutes and eleven seconds since [y/n] broke up with Sirius.

And they couldn't be worse without each other.

Neither of them left their dorm room for the weekend and if it wasn't for James and Lily, they wouldn't have eaten anything in those two days. Remus was starting to actually worry about Sirius and Marlene was worried like crazy about [y/n]...

But the problem was that, even Sirius was talking to his friends that he didn't know what to do without her, [y/n] wasn't...

She closed the curtains of her bed the second she sat at the bed but even after three days, eight hours, twenty-six minutes and four seconds, she didn't open it. And she wasn't going to until she could keep them closed.

The first night was torture to all of her friends. [y/n] tried, she really tried, but the loud and agonizing sobs were coming out of her in any way... She cried for the whole night all by herself. On the first ten minutes, Lily, Marlene and even Alice were trying to find a spell to open her curtains so they could help her friend and hold her, but nothing seemed to work.

After a while, they all went to their beds and when they thought she was going to stop crying, with a couple of seconds in silence, [y/n] wasn't able to hold it and she started crying harder. Marlene was silently crying on her bed with her face on her pillow, Alice went to her dorm and Lily tried to stay, but she couldn't take it, so she went to James' room. When she got there, Sirius bed was empty and they were all sleeping, Lily felt bad by coming here but as she turned around to walk away, James stopped her.

Anyone had ever seen Lily cry so much because of something...

Marlene was the unique one on the room with [y/n], she even thought of going somewhere else just to not listen to her best friend cry on that way, but she couldn't let her alone there.

[y/n]'s heart was aching like it was never before. Her first heartbreak, when her family forgot her birthday, when Sirius appeared with scars after summer break... Nothing compared to this moment where she had to hold herself while crying because she had a broken heart that would never be fixed again, and it was all her fault.

Well, that's what she was telling herself. Even with [y/n] wanting to stop thinking about anything - because literally had a way to get to Sirius Orion Black -, her brain was repeating like a mantra that it was happening because she wasn't the perfect girl for him.

While Sirius was bad...

Oh, the boy was heartbreak.

But he didn't want to think much about it, because he was still so confused about how everything just seemed to have collapsed after just a blink.

Because it felt like it, a second he was holding her and then he blinked and she broke up with him... All Sirius wanted was to understand what made [y/n] break his heart the way she has done, but he couldn't.

First of all, he could remember pretty well of when he was worried about her breaking up with him last month (when she was just doing a surprise for him) and Lily told him about how [y/n] said once how she knew he was the one. The one she wanted to be engaged with, married, live together, have kids with and have the happily ever after.

Lily also told him how [y/n] loved Sirius more than anything in this entire world and how she would do anything for him... So, it didn't fix it.

And he also thought about everything his brain could possibly think of that could be in any way a reason for her to break up with him and he wasn't understanding why nothing fixed!

Because even when [y/n]'s mouth was telling him she wanted to break up, her eyes couldn't even look inside of his and Sirius was able to read her better than a book. He saw by how her shoulders were down that she was already depressed before finishing her sentence, the way she started hyperventilate that she was trying to not cry in front of him, how her voice was failing on the middle of the words that she was holding down her sobs, the way she was nervously playing with her own fingers, her trembling lower lip, eyes that were screaming how she loved him... Everything was telling him that she didn't want to do it.

So, why did she?

That was the question that was haunting his thoughts since the first second he took to think about what had happened there.

Sirius thought that staying at the Astronomy Tower would help him to think about it, just like it had always helped [y/n] to study, but nothing was helping him...

Then he got frustrated with all of this bullshit. All he had to do was talk to [y/n], right? Then she would explain to him what actually happened and everything would be alright again because they would get back together and be happy just like they were.

And, while Sirius was thinking about what he was going to say to [y/n] so she would explain everything to him, Marlene, Lily and Alice woke up really early and ran to Professor McGonagall's classroom. If there was someone with more experience in heartbreaks than the girls and that would be willing to help [y/n] was Minerva.

It wasn't a lie to anyone that [y/n] was one of her favourite students - but if you ever told this to McGonagall, she would deny - and she would be happy to help.

So, when the girls explained to her why [y/n] wasn't there at class, why she also wasn't on the great hall for meals and how she was trying to stay distant from everyone, Minerva went right away with the girls to their dorm to check up on [y/l/n].

The same second the professor passed through the Fat Lady portrait, all the students at the common room during their free period looked at McGonagall like she was an alien inside of Hogwarts, maybe it was because she was supposed to be teaching Transfiguration to fifth years, but just maybe...

As they got close to the dorm's door, Marlene - that was the last one to leave - noticed that [y/n]'s sobs had finally stopped and all that they could hear were soft sniffles, heavy breathing and her bed creaking as [y/n] moved around to find a comfortable position that she hadn't been on the last days.

When the girls opened the door for Minerva, the first thing she noticed was the spell around the girl's bed so no one would bother her and if it was in another situation, the professor would be proud of her by such a well-done spell.

[y/n] was crying in a typical way without tears. Because there weren't any more tears to fall from her eyes.

"How long has it been?" Minerva asked while looking at the girls beside her that just shrugged her shoulders.

"Three days..." [y/n]'s raspy voice came out as a whisper but was stopped by a quiet sob. "Three days, ten hours, seven minutes and third-six seconds."

All the girls (and the woman) in the room felt their hearts clench with [y/n]'s hurt voice and how she knew exactly the time that had passed since the breakup. McGonagall, with just a shake of her wand and a whisper under her breath, made the spell open [y/n]'s curtains and in just a second they saw [y/n] wearing Sirius' quidditch jersey and her arms tightly holding one of her pillows to her chest as her legs tried to get closer to herself. She looked so vulnerable there, sitting alone at her bed, with swollen and red eyes...

Lily could feel that, if Sirius saw her like this, he would go back in time and make her sit at the right table on Potions Class, so she would never see how he was struggling with the potion, she would never have helped him to do it and they would never fall for each other.

Marlene was the fastest one to jump on [y/n]'s bed and hold her like their both lives depended on it.

Her soft arms wrapped around her best friend's body as [y/n]'s arms begrudgingly let go of her warm pillow, soon wrapping around Marlene's neck and gold blond hair. A single tear feel from [y/n]'s left eye, softly laying on her friend's shoulder.

Lily and Alice followed Marlene just right behind her and the three girls held their friend as close as they could. Minerva couldn't hold back the little smile that appeared on her face while seeing the girls caring so much about each other.

"Miss [y/l/n], I think you should get ready for your next class." McGonagall said softly and all the girls looked at her. [y/n] looked at her favourite professor with a grateful glance, that Minerva answered with a little nod.

The girls helped [y/n/n] get dressed, but even with her friends helping her, the girl just didn't seem to say anything to them about what happened between her and Sirius... But they knew that she was going to share with them every detail of her thoughts as soon as she was ready, and they just couldn't push it, even if they wanted to - which they didn't.

-

Sirius had been looking everywhere for [y/n].

Since he decided what he wanted and needed to say to her, Sirius ran downstairs from the Astronomy Tower and started to look for her at the corridors, classrooms, bathrooms, basically everywhere she could be, he had looked for.

His right hand went through his dark black locks in frustration as he looked around himself to see if he could grab a glimpse of [y/n]'s gorgeous [y/h/c] hair or anything that would make his mind scream to him that she was there and he should talk to her. But not even a red, gold blond or almost-white blond from any of the girls to give him some kind of hope that the love of his life could be any close to him.

All he noticed was a jet black hair, just like his, being followed by two other long dark hair. Regulus, Bellatrix and Narcissa. "What?" Sirius muttered to himself under his breath as he saw three of his family members walking to the staircases that led to the Gryffindor common room but the exact opposite way to the Slytherin one, with narrowed eyes...

Sirius didn't need to read minds to know that something was wrong. Something was telling him that he should go after them, that nothing good could come from it. So he did.

Sirius' black boots were tapping the castle floors through the crowds of students as silently as he could to not be seen by his family relatives as he followed them at the corridors. He was feeling like one of the spies from the muggle movies [y/n] had showed him before while hiding behind people, pillars, trash cans and anything he could use to not be noticed.

And then, the trio suddenly turned on an empty corridor, almost filed with fully darkness and Sirius stopped on the right side of the entrance to the hall. Just as he looked at it, Sirius felt his eyes shine with the beautiful sight that [y/n] was to his eyes. She didn't need much to be stunning...

'Wait...' He's thoughts stopped on the second that the reality fell upon him. 'Why are my brother and cousins talking to my girlfr-, ex-girlfriend, on a empty hall? And why does she look so scared?'

"[y/l/n]..." Regulus said and stopped in front of her, blocking her way and the light vision Sirius had of her.

"Look, I did exactly what asked me to, ok? Just let me be..." She snapped back with a trembling and weak voice that made Sirius want to run and just hold her in his arms again.

"We know and I just came here to say that my mother would be thankful for your help... If you weren't a mudblood, you know." Regulus said and Sirius' forehead frowned with anger and confusion. 'My mother asking [y/n/n] for a favor?'

"I didn't do it because your mother asked me to, I just broke up with Sirius because you were up to hurt him if i didn't do it. So, shut up because I don't need your mother's 'thank you's or anything else that comes from her." [y/n] said while poking Regulus' chest. "You should bother someone else with your puppies."

[y/n] passed through them, hitting her shoulder with Regulus' left one and Sirius felt like there was a light bulb above his head being turned on. It all finally made sense, the way that [y/n] didn't want to break up with him, the way she was worried sick with him the whole week, the way she almost freaked out when she thought that the spell hit Sirius and not Peter... And it was all his family's fault.

Sirius didn't know what to do to fix this hugeous mess that was happening just under his nose, but he knew that he needed to take his family threats and intentions far from him and his love before he went to talk to her.

He silently thanked Godric Gryffindor when [y/n] went to the other side of the corridor and didn't notice him there, eavesdropping on their serious conversation. Sirius would take care of this talk with her later...

Just when Regulus started to walk out of the scary corridor, Sirius stopped in front of his little brother, that nervously gulped loudly with the sight of the last person who should hear about their mother's plan.

"You know I love you, Reg. And I know it's not your fault, but if I ever see you talk to [y/n] again, you'd wished you never listened to mother for once." Sirius said calmly. "And don't forget to tell her that there's no way I'm gonna let this girl go, I love her more than anything in this entire world and any of you will take her away from me."

Sirius turned around and walked away from a scared and disappointed - with himself - Regulus and ran to find the unique girl who could make him do those crazy things and don't regret anything after...

Sirius even felt himself starting to hit a few people while he tried to pass through the slow people walking around but he didn't bring himself to stop and care about them while he had to look for her as fast as he could. His heartbeat was in an almost impossible speed, his hands sweating and lightly trembling with anticipation, his mind running around the whole castle while his body was trying to follow his thoughts... Until he saw her.

His whole world froze and all he could see was [y/n] calmly walking to her next class, just like everyone else around her - who his eyes didn't bother to focus or pay attention to. All Sirius was seeing was [y/n].

And before he could notice his movements or think of what he would do when he got to her, his legs were bringing him the closer he could get to her. And, when he thought that the world wasn't moving already, Sirius felt everything else disappear when [y/n] turned around by his hand touching her shoulder.

[y/n] have never looked more gorgeous to him before...

Even with the sore eyelids, the dark bag under her eyes, her without-life skin, her pale lips, her tired eyes and the frown on her forehead when her eyes captured the sight of him... [y/n] couldn't be anymore gorgeous even if she wanted to.

"Sirius?" Her surprised and confused whisper fell upon dead ears as Sirius grabbed the sides of her face and glued his lips on hers.

They've done it so many times before, but after passing days thinking that they would never do it again, made it as special as the very first time, two years ago, in their fourth year.

[y/n] didn't kissed back in the first seconds, but she didn't pull away neither. [y/n] knew she shouldn't, actually, she couldn't do it, but she just couldn't bring herself to stop it and pull away from Sirius' touch. And in a few seconds, she felt her whole body melt onto the kiss as [y/n] finally kissed him back.

Sirius felt a wave of relief pass through his body as it was a shock while [y/n] felt all her organs burning from inside out. At that moment, neither of them knew how they survived the last three days, fifteen hours, forty-three minutes and six seconds without feeling each other's touch.

Sirius' hands fell from her face to her waist like there was the place they belonged to and [y/n]'s hands ran in the direction of his dark hair, getting lost in there like it was the maze she was used of going every single day.

When [y/n] felt her mind dizzy with one of the best kisses they ever shared, she separated her lips from his, but just enough for them to be felt almost touching, their foreheads touching and their hot breathes mixing.

"Sirius, wh-" [y/n] started, but before she could keep going, Sirius abruptly interrupted her.

"I know the truth." [y/n] could have opened her eyes wide as a fish if they weren't glued closed with tiredness. "And I don't care. They took a lot from me, but they're not taking you, just over my dead body..." Sirius said and took a breath to keep going. "I love you, I want you. I only care about you. I don't care about what they think is right for me, because it's you. Only you, [y/n]."

"I love you too, Siri." That was all that [y/n] could let out with a trembling voice but with the biggest certain that she ever had about anything in this world.

They needed each other and nothing would be on their way to happiness and love.

☀︎︎☀︎︎☀︎︎☀︎︎☀︎︎

+ bonus: (Sirius' letter to his mother)

Dear Mother, hope you and father are going well, even if you don't care about me. I think you heard from someone (probably Reg) that your master plan wasn't so good and it didn't work out... I just wanted to say that I'm sorry if you think I'm ever going to stay away from [y/n]. I love her more than I've ever loved anything in this world and I don't care about her blood status - which just makes me love her more. I think you won't understand me because your marriage wasn't pretty much your choice, but all I'm asking you is to let her alone. Every single choice I've done until now were decided by me, and anyone else should take the consequences for it. If you ever have a problem with me, I don't want you to make Regulus do your dirty little job, I want for you to talk to me. Thank you for reading so far and I won't be coming home anymore, neither receiving any letters from you. So, enjoy this picture of me and my gorgeous girlfriend, being happy on a beautiful sunset, just the two of us. I love her and only her, hope someday you'll understand that she's an amazing woman and deserve all the happiness and love the world can give her. Goodbye, mother... Sincerely, Sirius Orion Black.

☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾

Taglist:

@cheapglitter @weasleysmuch @missmulti @writtenbypics @littlemaladaptivedaydreamer @dralf0yy @buff-bork @rd155 @seppys-return-to-madness @luciferedits @old-soul-young-mind @pxtrickhxckstettxr @sleep-i-ness @marauderswhisperer @liberty01 @gweaslvy @weasleytwins-41 @siriuslysirius07 @turtlepad @ilovewinter101 @monimillion @simonsbluee @smokey102​ @aberette13 @yourbloodyqueen @loverboyreid @eeshea @susceptible-but-siriusexual @weareloserstogether​

[imaginejamesandsirius]

I love your fics so much, thank you for keeping this ship alive! I really appreciate your hard work and I love your characterisations for James and Sirius. There's no pressure to write this if you're busy, but a deathly hallows fic would be cool. Sirius survived the battle at the Ministry. Voldemort brought James and Regulus back (to use them as bait or to torture them, any reason is fine) but Peter has been guarding them? Mainly Sirius' reaction to them being alive? Probably angst then fluff :)

Naturally, Sirius's first reaction was to kill him. Considering how many years he'd been thinking about murdering Pettigrew, it wasn't exactly a surprise that that was his first reaction. And then he had some time to think about it, and that initial reaction didn't go away.

Unsurprisingly, Harry was the one holding him back. Rather, Harry was in his way, and Sirius wasn't going to risk hurting him. "Sirius, don't," Harry said as he slid in front of him, facing Pettigrew. It was a good thing there was no one else in this building, otherwise they'd be incredibly suspicious of what was happening between all of them.

"Move," Sirius said tensely.

"No. What are you doing here?" he asked Pettigrew.

"I- I-" Pettigrew swallowed thickly, looking as nervous as ever.

He was saved from having to continue when a head peeked around him. "Oh good," he said flatly. "Another Potter. That's what the world needed more of."

"Regulus?" Sirius said numbly.

Harry glanced back at him, looking as bewildered as Sirius felt. "Regulus as in your brother?"

"That would be me," Regulus confirmed, stepping half out from behind Pettigrew. He was then pushed further to the side so an extremely familiar figure could reveal himself with a wide grin.

"Sorry Wormtail," James said, not sounding very sorry at all, "but you were taking too long. Dark magic, Voldemort's got some strange ideas, and a nice heaping of something I'm going to call divine intervention. Like, seriously, if he knew he could resurrect people, wouldn't he have picked people that supported him?"

"He never was very smart on the small scale," Regulus said.

Sirius felt like his legs were going to give out. "What the hell is going on?"

James blinked at him. "Didn't I just say? Voldemort resurrected us. Still iffy on the why of it, but-"

"Aside from Dumbledore, he considers Harry and Sirius the biggest threat to his power," Pettigrew interrupted quietly. "With Dumbledore gone, he wanted to get rid of them next. He figured he could lure them into an ambush with the two of you as bait and then there would be no one to oppose him."

"And we're supposed to believe that you suddenly had a change of heart?" Harry asked.

"I'm not asking for anyone to trust me."

"Then what are you wanting in exchange for getting them out?" Sirius asked, because there was no way he was bringing them here purely out of the goodness of his heart-- not after he'd cared for Voldemort in Harry's fourth year at Hogwarts and helped him get back to his full strength.

"Someplace to hide," he answered immediately.

"You should-" Harry started to say, but he cut himself off before he could finish. He'd probably been about to say that if Pettigrew wanted protection, he should go to Dumbledore for it, not them. Harry was having a hard time dealing with it. Despite having more misadventures in school and having to deal with so many issues by himself, he'd still looked to Dumbledore as the wizard with all the answers-- the one that could save them, just as he'd saved the Wizarding World from Grindelwald all those years ago.

Sirius knew the feeling. Even for all the mistakes Dumbledore had made, he'd been a hell of a lot better at managing the situation than anyone else. Sirius put a hand on Harry's shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze. "There's an old Black property you can stay at. Warded to hell and back, if you want to stay there, but after that you're on your own." It wasn't as good as Grimmauld Place had been, but that location was compromised, what with Snape and everything. The entire situation with Snape didn't sit right with him, but he didn't have the time to think about it now, and he hadn't had the time for weeks, and probably wouldn't have time for a while longer. Figuring out what was going on in Snape’s head wasn’t exactly a high priority for him.

Pettigrew nodded vigorously. He'd probably hole up there and not leave for a decade, or until he heard news that the war was over.

Sirius glanced at James, eyes lingering, then Regulus. What was he supposed to do about this? The obvious answer is that they'd stay with him and everyone else at the Black Manor-- Merlin knew it had the space to fit everyone-- but he should make sure it was them, right? Only he had no idea how to do that. It was supposed to be a rule of magic that no one could be resurrected. With a lot of heavy spellwork, people could be charmed to look like them, but voices were hard to pin down. There was a piece of a person's essence in their voice, which is why polyjuice was so time consuming to brew.

But their voices had been perfect. Maybe that was authentication enough. "Safe to say neither of you have grand plans?" Sirius asked, a touch flatly.

"Nope," James said cheerfully. "Open schedule. I'll be back to kicking arse as soon as I get a wand again."

"...You don't have a wand?" Sirius asked. It shouldn't surprise him, but it did. Mostly he was worried at how vulnerable they were without wands.

"I wasn't exactly brought back to life with all my possessions intact."

Sirius glanced at Regulus, wondering if he was going to answer, but he looked to the side shiftily. He did have things he wanted to do, but he wasn't going to say it. Sirius was going to choose to believe that that wasn't about him, but about Pettigrew's presence. He made a mental note to ask Regulus about it when they had a moment alone together. "We'll see about getting you wands tomorrow." He'd do it tonight if it wasn't so late, but buying a new wand wasn't exactly a two minute endeavor. "C'mon, we'll drop Pettigrew off and then go get some sleep."

"That's it?" Regulus asked. "You're accepting that it's us just like that?"

"I've got my reasons, Reggie," Sirius said, just because he knew Regulus hated that nickname.

Sure enough, there was a familiar twist to his mouth, but it eased when he caught the smile on Sirius's. Then he rolled his eyes with his usual long suffering sigh. It was strange that it had been so long since he'd been alive, and even longer since they were on good terms with each other, but this was as familiar as breathing.

Sirius winked at James, who stifled a laugh. "Let's go."

*

Pettigrew thanked him for the place to stay, and Sirius pretended like he still didn't want him dead. Unfortunately, he didn't have the luxury of murdering someone right now, and he would settle for never seeing him again-- a courtesy extended because he had brought James and Regulus back; if Lily had been with them, Sirius might have considered actually forgiving him, but Pettigrew only operated out of fear, and Sirius would never be able to trust him.

The handful of other people staying in the Manor were already in bed, so Sirius was saved from having to explain the situation.

Regulus stood awkwardly in the corner, not sure what to make of being here with people he barely knew in a place he'd only visited during holidays as a child before their father succumbed entirely to paranoia and moved them to Grimmauld Place permanently.

James had some getting-to-know-you conversation with Harry before the kid got so tired that Sirius sent him to bed, and then James barreled into him, hugging him so tight it hurt. Regulus ambled off to his old room without saying goodbye, only making eye contact for a couple awkward seconds with Sirius before he left; they hadn't said anything to each other, and they'd probably make it through most of tomorrow morning without breaking that silence.

"Merlin, Sirius, I missed you so much," he whispered.

"Were you- were you aware of time passing?" It was a horrifying thought, that he might’ve been in limbo for that long.

"No, I meant- erm, y'know, me and Lily were in hiding, so I hadn't seen you for months." James pulled back a little, letting his arms drop to the side. "I imagine you've had it a hell of a lot worse, though. I mean, it's been... what, fifteen years?"

"Something like that," Sirius said, even though he knew it to the day. Moony said that he was obsessed, but he disagreed. He'd spent so long in Azkaban, letting the days meld together into a massive, horrible blur. Keeping track of how much of his life he'd lived without James was just a way of keeping tabs on that lost time.

"What've you been up to? I want to hear everything I missed."

"Not much to tell," Sirius hedged, knowing as he said it that it wouldn't be enough to deter him.

"I missed fifteen years and you expect me to believe that there isn't much to tell? If you don't want to talk about yourself, then how about Harry as a kid? It seems like he's turned out pretty great."

No one had told him. That made sense. After all, who would've mentioned it? Pettigrew wasn't about to explain everything, and presumably, the only other person he'd talked to was Regulus, who was similarly ignorant of what had happened. "James..."

"What?" he asked, frowning.

"I didn't raise Harry."

"What are you talking about? You're his godfather, of course you raised him."

Sirius sighed, walking over to the couch and collapsing onto it. "Did Pettigrew tell you why he was in a position to save you tonight?"

James opened his mouth, then closed it again. "No," he said quietly. He sat on the couch next to Sirius, close enough that he wouldn't have to shift his weight very much to make contact. "I assumed he was undercover or summat, but I'm guessing you're going to tell me that's wrong."

"Mate, he was your secret keeper in the first war. He betrayed you to Voldemort."

James didn't say anything, looking like that hadn't occurred to him before.

"I went after him because of it, wanting revenge. When I finally found him, he blew up the street. Cut off his finger and transformed so he could run. I got blamed for the deaths and went to Azkaban."

"What?" James breathed, aghast.

Sirius ignored that and rubbed his palms together just to give him something to do with his hands. "I escaped a couple years ago. Got my name cleared of the crime last month. There's... there's really not much to tell. I haven't done anything except been on the run and tried to help Harry when I could. Not that he needed it. He's a bright kid." He paused, letting that sink in. The Azkaban thing, not that Harry was smart-- the latter didn't require time to get used to. Then, "How long were you and Regulus back for?"

"I dunno, maybe a week? We talked a lot, got to know each other a little. He's pretty funny when he wants to be. You were really in Azkaban?"

"Is that really so hard to believe?"

"Yes. Where the hell was Moony?"

"Imagine, for a moment, a werewolf trying to force the Ministry into letting go a suspected member of the Death Eaters."

"How could anyone think you were a Death Eater?"

"The name Black carries a lot of baggage, mate. You know that."

James's expression made it clear that he did know that, and he thought it was shite; personally, Sirius agreed, but he didn't see the point in saying so aloud. James didn't push it. Whether it was because he didn't want to think about it or he knew that Sirius didn't want to talk about it, he left it alone, and Sirius was grateful. "Can I stay with you tonight?"

"Yeah, of course."

The first thing James did when the door to the bedroom closed was kiss Sirius. The second thing he did, immediately after, was go rifling through the clothes so he could change into something of Sirius's. Even when he'd had his own wardrobe, he'd still often chosen to wear Sirius's things. He'd always said that they were more comfortable, but Sirius had known it was because James liked the way he smelled. Even now, with perfectly legitimate reasons to need to change and specifically to wear Sirius's things, Sirius would be willing to bet that James's motivation remained unchanged.

For his part, Sirius was stood, frozen by the door, a hand brought up to his mouth, because James had kissed him so easily, like a good night peck to remind Sirius that he loved him, and it wasn't something that Sirius had felt in over a decade. He was as mind-numbingly in love with James today as he had been yesterday and the last time that he'd seen him alive. James had taken his feelings as a given, and he'd been right.

*

Sirius was the first one in the house up, trying to figure out the logistics of getting two people wands without letting anyone see their faces. A few cosmetic spells to change distinctive features would be the best option, but a lot of places had protections in place so that people couldn't do that now. A safety precaution for them, but a minor one. Mostly, it was an annoyance since it prevented Sirius from doing things the easy way, and it didn't do much to stop the wizards that wanted to hurt people. Polyjuice wasn't so easily circumvented, but they didn't have very much of that and Sirius would prefer to save it for an emergency-- not to mention part of it was already being saved for Bill and Fleur's wedding so that Harry could attend. It's not like he could just decide to brew more with everything else going on.

He was still trying to figure it out when Regulus walked into the room. Without a good morning or a nod hello, he said, "Do you know what a horcrux is?"

Sirius had rather forgotten how blunt his brother could be, as well as how light his footsteps were. He jerked so hard in surprise that he knocked over his cup and spilt tea all over the table. "Why do you know what a horcrux is?"

"The Dark Lord has at least one. Possibly more. We're never going to survive this if-"

"It was you," Sirius said, realising it all at once. Harry had told him about the locket and the cave he'd gone to with Dumbledore, and he'd said that there was a note inside, but he hadn't shown it to Sirius; he'd only summarised what it said. "You died stealing Slytherin's locket."

Regulus blinked at him, not betraying the shock he was surely feeling. "Yes."

"Where is it? Or did you manage to destroy it?"

A pause, then he shook his head. "I left it with Kreacher. I don't know if he was ever successful."

"You would've left it with him," Sirius said grumpily.

"You should be more kind to him."

"He believed in all our parents' blood purist rubbish, and you want me to be nice to him?"

"You were always cruel."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "After I get you a wand, will you go over to Grimmauld Place and see if he still has it?"

"Why don't you do it?"

"Because he bloody hates me, and I hate him. I'll go with you if you care so buggering much, but he won't tell me shite if I go there alone."

Regulus stared at him for a moment, then repeated, quietly, "I still think you could've been nicer to him."

"For fuck's sake, is this really an argument you want to have with me?" Sirius asked. "Consider, for a moment, what you used to believe and think if I'll ever be willing to concede to you about something, even if you're right."

Regulus continued to look at him. He'd always done that: stared silently and waited. Sometimes, even when their parents had asked him a direct question, he'd stayed quiet.

Not so suddenly, but rather as part of a growing emotion that had been building from the first moment he saw his brother alive and well again, he felt like dirt. What was he supposed to do about it? The answer was, obviously, change how he was acting. But he didn't know how else to act. Even having James back wasn't enough to fix everything. It made Sirius feel a hell of a lot better, no doubt, but it didn't actually help him know what to do. Creepy as it was to think, James was basically a kid. It's not like James would have all the answers he needed for how to win this, how to save Harry from any further harm, or how to help everyone that needed it.

"Your last wand was ash, right?" Sirius asked.

Regulus nodded.

"I'll try and get you something similar."

"You're not taking me with you?"

"It wouldn't be safe. James is going to stay here too," he added, thinking that that might make Regulus feel better. After all, this time, it wasn't personal. Sirius wasn't going to take anyone with him when he left today because the risk would be too great. For that matter, the sooner he got it done, the better. He cleaned up his mess and headed for the door. "I'll be back soon."

"You're leaving now?"

Sirius paused and turned back to face him. "The sooner you have a wand, the safer you'll be. I'll only be a minute."

Regulus didn't say anything. He just stared.

"What?" Sirius prodded.

"Nothing," Regulus said immediately, but that was clearly a lie.

Sirius waited for him to change his mind, but he didn't. "Fine."

*

"Are you alright?" James asked when they were alone again. Not alone by happenstance, but because Sirius had gone to the loo, and James, with his usual disregard for normal societal boundaries, had followed him. At least he had waited until Sirius was done to talk.

If it was anyone else, Sirius would say that of course he was alright. But this was James, and James would know in a flat second if he was lying. "It's wartime, mate. No one's alright."

"Why do you keep doing that?"

"Doing what?"

"Calling me mate."

"Because you are?"

"Yeah, but it's just us here. We don't need to hide our relationship from anyone."

Sirius chewed on the inside of his cheek, trying to think of how he should phrase what was on his mind.

"Is this about Lily?" James asked, because he could understand how that would complicate matters, especially with Harry around.

"No. It's- it's about you."

James swallowed thickly and tried to keep a brave face. "If you don't love me anymore, you can-"

"Don't be stupid," Sirius cut in, "of course I still love you."

"Then what's wrong?"

"You're... for Merlin's sake, James, you're practically a kid. You're only a couple years older than Harry now."

"Okay," James said slowly. "Does this bother you or are you worried because you think it should bother you?"

Sirius opened his mouth to say that yes, it did bother him, then he paused. "I- well, I don't know. I've been too busy for introspection."

"Either make the time or let it go. It's just me, Sirius. We've always got each other; we always will."

"You say 'always' a lot for a bloke that was dead a month ago."

"If me being dead for ages didn't change how you felt, I don't see what that has to do with anything."

Sirius chuckled. It was such a James thing to say that he couldn't help himself. "Fine. If it makes anyone think I'm being a pedo though, you have to explain it to them."

"I will. Happily. They'll have to sit there while I talk about you. Do you know how long it's been since people couldn't leave while I do that?"

"I'd imagine it's been a while."

"And you'd be right. Lily said that if I did it one more time, she was going to make me cook every night instead of switching."

"I thought you liked cooking," Sirius said. That's what James had always told him when Sirius said that he didn't have to cook him breakfast.

"I do, but not every single night for someone that's such a bloody picky eater. Not blaming Lily, but she had a whole list of things she couldn't eat. You would eat anything and everything I put in front of you and say it was delicious."

"It was delicious."

"And that's one of the many reasons I keep you around," James said with a grin.

*

"Reg, Regulus, buddy," James said, putting an arm around his shoulders and steering him away. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Don't think what's a good idea?" Regulus asked, frowning.

"You and Harry."

"Me and Harry what?"

"Dating."

"Okay?" he said slowly, clearly confused about where James was getting that from. It's not like he was attracted to Harry, and Harry certainly wasn't attracted to him either. "I'll keep that in mind, but you know that you're only sort of his father, right?"

"Excuse you, I'm definitely his father."

"A father that's the same age as an older brother," Regulus said.

"True as that might be, it doesn't change what I think of the two of you."

"There's nothing there to be thinking about, but okay." Regulus slipped out from under his arm and quickly left the room.

James huffed and stomped over to the study, where Sirius was trying to figure out the logistics of how many people could reasonably fit inside the Manor. James had offered to help, but Sirius threw him out-- with a laugh-- when James had sat on his lap and kept distracting him with kisses and invitations for more fun things they could be doing. "Your brother is being irresponsible," he said as he barged in.

"Yeah, he does that. I thought you knew. Or did the horcrux hunt not clue you in?"

"I think he fancies Harry," James said, hoping to get Sirius on his side.

Sirius snorted.

Maybe Sirius wasn't on his side; there had to be a first time for everything, he supposed.

"I don't think you have anything to worry about, love."

"You think Regulus doesn't fancy him?"

"I think that whether or not Regulus fancies Harry is immaterial because he'll never act on it, and if Harry is the one to initiate some sort of relationship, then it'll hardly be Regulus's fault if it all goes to shite."

James blinked once, twice, then said, "I don't think I like your parenting method here."

"Oh, you're right, I should go meddle in both of their love lives. That'll get them to like me." Sirius stretched his arms over his head and James considered abandoning his protection of Harry to give sitting in Sirius's lap another try. "So long as they aren't trying to hurt each other, I'm staying out of it."

"That doesn't sound like the meddling Sirius Black that I fell in love with."

"Tragically, I grew up," Sirius said, throwing a smirk in his direction.

James was weak, so he walked over and leaned against the desk, facing Sirius. "Tragic, indeed. I mean, look at you. You went and got horribly handsome while I still look like a kid. So unfair."

"Life's not fair," Sirius said, leaning forward and putting an arm around James's hips to pull him closer.

"I can see you're very upset about that on my behalf," James said flatly.

"Oh, extremely."

"Are you going to do anything to cheer me up?"

"The fact that I haven't kicked you out again should let you know the answer to that," Sirius said, pulling James's shirt up enough that he could kiss at his newly bared skin.

*

James sniffled, rubbing at his face with a sleeve to get rid of the tears before they could fall down his cheeks and make them itch.

"James?" Harry asked, since calling him 'Dad' had felt weird to both of them.

James glanced over at him, then rubbed harder at his face. "Hey. What's up?"

"Are you okay?" Harry asked. He pulled up a chair next to him.

"Yeah, just- y'know. Thinking about Lily. She would've loved all this," he said, giving a wave to encompass the room, the house, and everyone in it. "She always thought it was stupid that we split up. She always wanted a big family... friends around all the time."

Harry was quiet for a long moment. When he spoke again, it wasn't what James expected. "After being told about you and Sirius, I always wondered if you ever loved her. But you did, didn't you?"

James nodded. "It wasn't simple, and if she was here now, I'm sure things would be very different, but I do love her."

“Ah,” he said, then he shifted his weight awkwardly, unsure what to do with himself. "Do you want me to leave you alone?"

"Nah, you're fine, Haz. On the topic of love, has anyone caught your eye?” James gave another wipe at his eyes since he wasn’t crying anymore but still had some stray tears that had leaked free while he was talking to Harry. “Now that you're not, y'know, running from people that want you dead."

Harry grinned at him. "If there was, I wouldn't tell you," he said, jokingly giving his shoulder a shove.

"Oh, I see how it is. Pick on your old man."

"Yeah, you're so, so old, at the ripe age difference of four years."

"That's right. Respect your elders, you young whipper snapper."

*

James shifted so that his ear was pressed over Sirius's heart. His head rose and fell with every breath Sirius took. He'd been back for a year now, and he still wasn't tired of this. He acted casually when his death was mentioned, but every morning he got to wake up next to Sirius was a miracle. A miracle he never tired of.

Moony joked that he was clingy, and Regulus said that he was so over-the-top in love with Sirius because they were practically the same person so it was little more than an exercise in narcissism. James didn't care what anybody else said, because getting this for a year had been more than he thought he'd ever get. Getting it for the rest of his life? Definitely a miracle.

He knew the minute that Sirius woke because his breathing changed, and a few seconds later, Sirius's fingers threaded through his hair. "You awake?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah."

"Nightmare?"

"Yeah." Nothing noteworthy. He didn't even remember it. All he knew was that it had scared him awake, and the only thing that could calm him down was wrapping himself around Sirius. It was a solution he hardly minded.

"You want to talk about it?" Sirius offered.

"No. I don't remember what it was. I just couldn't get back to sleep."

"Okay," Sirius said, and then they laid there for a long time in comfortable silence, the only sound the ticking of the clock.

[unfortunatelysirius]

╰☆☆ ℕ𝕆𝕋 𝕐𝕆𝕌ℝ 𝔾𝕀ℝ𝕃𝔽ℝ𝕀𝔼ℕ𝔻 ☆☆╮ [Sirius Black – Marauders Era] [Part 13]

Previous Installments: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12 ╰❂╮ prompt ╰❂╮ ☾ ¡Original! ☾ Y/N and Regulus make a pact, and Sirius begins to uncover the truth. ╰❂╮ author’s note ╰❂╮ so so sorry for the huge wait, but here i am, and this is short (not terribly short but still short) but believeeeee me, the next part will be soon and will be big~ hope you guys are doing fantastic :]]] ╰❂╮ warnings ╰❂╮ Angst, Swearing ╰❂╮ word count ╰❂╮ 1843 ╰❂╮ tag-list ╰❂╮ @kapolisradomthoughts @rageofcaliban @saucyleftovers @bunnymother93 @siriuslyr5 @apareciumimagines  @random-quartz @ruefulposts @seabasstiantrash @starlightspidey @pinkettepoet @peppermintspecks @jiongyongguk

    “Regulus,” whispered Y/N, heart pounding erratically against her chest, “what is going on?”

         There was nothing—nothing but the look of disdain he wore as a mask, and the blue, tremoring veins pressed against the tightly-woven flesh of his fist, an alarming feature that did not whisk by unnoticed. Observing him, Y/N could read nothing but his obvious fatigue, the tension in his shoulders, the way his hair appeared uncombed. The wrinkled composition of his robes. The resemblance he bore to Severus Snape at that moment was unsettling, though Y/N could tell it was not something he wanted—not in the slightest—and that alone caused an ache of sympathy to shoot through Y/N’s heart—

         But observations aside, there was a reason she was called away from her obligations of sitting and dissecting pumpkin crumble to assist him as a conservational partner. The last part was certainly dubious. Of course, this was Regulus Black she was associating herself with; the boy was antisocial, and clever beyond a wit’s measure, and Y/N never saw him talking to anyone but a select few housemates and occasionally Sirius. The two of them weren’t friends. This had to be a serious matter, though the prejudiced part of Y/N wondered if his unsubtle request was a cruel joke, one he would allow Mulciber and Rosier and Goyle to perform on her.

         “You’ve been Obliviated,” said Regulus, finally, in such a tone—dripping in finality—that Y/N startled. “Do you remember anything?”

         Y/N pushed his words aside, her fear overruling rationality, the side which wanted to listen and understand what has caused everything to go so terribly wrong. She bit her lip, and frowned. “We shouldn’t be talking to each other—it could wind up getting you or me seriously hurt—“

         “That’s not what matters here, Y/N!” Y/N, in all her years at Hogwarts, never thought Regulus to be capable of raising his voice. This caused her to blink, and to internally shrink, previous fight slowly faltering, like a dying animal. “I know the stories. I know the rumors. And I know you’re being a pawn to a bigger player’s game.”

         Y/N’s frown deepened. “How did you know I was Obliviated? How do you know any of this?”

         “Not the point,” Regulus said dismissively, and then hissed, “Any proper potions brewer can manipulate the potion to perform a supplement of its actual effect. Take Veritaserum; with proper handling, and proper instruction, any person with a brain can tamper it to make everything out of your mouth a lie, not truth.

         “The same can be done to a love potion. You can tamper it, enchant it, to make whoever sips it temporarily smitten with the first person they see. But the strong brewers can use their words, make whoever you become smitten with whoever they want. And sometimes, they can mix it with other elements and ingredients, make it where you’re in a different mindset and following the heart of whoever it is. The last one’s easier. All you need is a lock of someone’s hair.”

         Y/N gasped, horrified to think everything was suddenly making sense, then thought back to that fatal outing she had with Sirius:

{…} “The stars do look rather beautiful tonight,” said Y/N, raising her canteen at Sirius. She was the first to take a sip.

Then, she mumbled something. It was a hollow, throated sound, filled with monotonous desperation. And Y/N’s entire mind clouded, replaced with the thoughts of someone foreign, the feelings as foreign to her as water was to fire, and thoughts appeared, all at once.

I wonder if Father will allow me to marry Lucius. He’s the only kind one of my suitors. Oh, but Alex! He may be young, but he has an adventurous soul, though it is rather limited. I remember the flowers he brought me on Valentine’s…

Her gaze was now clearing and her eyelids were thickening, raising higher and higher and higher—all until she looked like a madwoman, breaths falling from her mouth in uneven intervals. “Alex. Alex. Oh, Alex.”

Sirius looked horrified. He reached across the table and grabbed her hands into his, ignoring how she recoiled at his touch—ignoring the repulsion on her mouth. “Y/N,” he said softly. “Who is Alex?”

Y/N—Narcissa—snatched her hands away from him. “Oh, Alex,” she whimpered. “How could he bear to know that someone with the name Black has touched my hand, has branded me a blood-traitor? He will never ask for my hand in marriage now. Never, never, never.”

         Alex will never take the hand of a blood traitor. I am no blood-traitor. I am Narcissa Black, the only Black not crazy or a traitor, and Alex will take my hand in marriage.

         -

         “Oh my god,” said Y/N, no longer able to stand on her own two legs. She slowly slumped to the ground, bringing with her whatever dignity she had left.

         Regulus crouched down, bringing up a hand to lay on Y/N’s knee. It may have looked suggestive to any mere passerby, but Y/N knew it was empathetic comfort, nothing more. “I’ll need to help you get back your memories, Y/N,” the boy said lowly, quiet enough that they were the only two souls to hear it. “But we cannot do it here. Meet me in the Restricted Section tonight, at midnight.”

         Before Y/N could get a word out—specifically her affirmation for the idea---Regulus was standing and turning, leaving with a swish of his robes. It left Y/N with a rotten taste in her mouth, one that caused her to sink further into the ground, wishing she could be swallowed whole.

         -

         “Oh, Merlin,” Remus Lupin whispered, turning to look at Sirius after the four Marauders watched Regulus stride off and Y/N collapse. They’d heard most of everything, and the broken, remorseful expression on Sirius’s face was enough to make any living person’s chest ache. “Sirius…”

         But Sirius wasn’t looking. And he wasn’t listening. He had his eyes clenched shut, looking to be totally void of any sense for the modern day, as he pulled at his hair, angry, angry, angry, like the only one he now wanted to punch and kick was himself.

         Similarly, James wasn’t looking at either of them. And he held no attention for Peter, who was nervously looking at Remus, like he was the only one with any real sense. Instead, James was staring at Y/N. Watching her with this look of heart-churning realization, like his gut had wrenched itself inside-out. He’d been so angry at her, thinking she’d played some sick game with his best mate’s head, when in reality, they were all pawns to a bigger pawn’s game—just like Regulus had said.

         And Regulus. James knew it was shameful for the four of them—the Marauders, known for their wit and intelligence—to be so stupidly blind. To allow Y/N to be hurt, and to hunt for answers all by herself, while they patted their friend on the back, brooding over the betrayal of someone who did nothing but wear her heart on her sleeve, like a true Gryffindor.

         James was disappointed in himself. He should have known something was amiss, especially when Y/N came knocking on their door, desperate to reconcile. If she were truly ill-intentioned, she would not have come looking to apologize. She wouldn’t have seemed ready to cry when James had snapped at her, telling her to leave his best friend alone.

         It was all a bloody mess. One that James had no clue how to fix.

         One that Remus had no clue how to fix.

         One that Peter had no clue how to fix.

         One that Sirius had no clue how to fix.

-

         Y/N stood, onto shaky legs. She could feel her heart pounding, and her body aching, as though she’d been pummeled by the sky a thousand times over. And she could feel her heart hurting, more than it had ever hurt before, because this time it was due to fallen memories, dying from the absence it held of answers she needed, ones made complicated by the flourish of a fucking wand.

         She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry. She wanted to pound her fists into the dirt, yelling for a mercy that no one—not even Merlin himself—would grant.

         This situation was painful. So painful and so consequential that Y/N was looking to a stranger for guidance, a boy who she once thought washed with insensible, parental bullshit, now capable of compassion, and willing to help her, even though she was broken—broken beyond prepare.

         And here was the broken girl, walking slowly away from the place where she’d lost her dignity, heading to where she’d stay until it was time for answers, her dormitory, because she had nowhere else to go, and not a single soul to curve into for comfort.

         And even now, she was hallucinating the idea of Sirius, for he was standing in the next corridor, there with his friends, three blokes once dearly close to Y/N, before she’d lost them. And he seemed so real, too, because he was staring at her, with these round, bloodshot eyes, just staring, so terribly sad and heartbroken that Y/N just wanted to hug him.

         She ached to touch him again, to hold him dear and close—just as she dreamed and just as she now deluded herself into imagining. It was beautiful. And heart-wrenching.

         Something Y/N kept thinking, and yearning for, that she could hardly feel or return the hard, abrupt, and clumsy hug she suddenly received from Sirius Black himself.

         She was frozen. She was concerned. She questioned her own sanity because his arms felt so real, his hair felt so real, his tears felt so real. Was he real? Was this a ghost of the past? Was this a dream? Or would he get brutally ripped from her, leaving her in the essence of a nightmare?

         She was unsure. She was stuck. Until he murmured three words, against the base of her throat, words that brought air bubbles into her heart’s pitter-pattering beat, that had a hiccupping sob erupting from her mouth—

         “I’m so sorry.”

         And Y/N’s arms returned the hug, feverishly, like she might never hug again. Like he might disappear, and she’d be left with nothing. But he was physical flesh. He was physical bone. He was a beautiful canvas, one Y/N desperately sought to ruin, over and over again, until he was her flesh, until he was her bone.

         “I love you,” he sobbed into her hair. “I’m so sorry. I’m sorry.”

         And though Y/N wanted to pound at his chest and scream at him for shredding apart her heart and leaving her with nothing, she felt no other feeling than love, than wholeness, for her heart was no longer shredded. It had come back together into a puzzle of pieces meant only for one man, whose name was Sirius.

         He was here, living, breathing—and he still loved her. And that was all that mattered.

[masked-disciple]

I posted 7,239 times in 2021

58 posts created (1%)

7181 posts reblogged (99%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 123.8 posts.

I added 1,535 tags in 2021

#third life - 575 posts

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Longest Tag: 117 characters

#but everything is problematic and if i’m going to get history i dislike being told we have to stop having fun with it

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

If anyone's wondering, I did finish up some art! You have no idea how glad I am to be done with this! It's Sagiverse!Regulus~

11 notes • Posted 2021-10-14 06:29:14 GMT

#4

tbh this whole thing with CT has made me reconsider my opinions on reality shifting, because if they have garbage opinion on anything outside of their narrow worldview, why not? Off to repainting Hogwarts in trans flag colors I go

SNORTS

Please go ask Dinocanid or FancySon, those are the reality shifts I know, and they should be able to help you learn how to do that. But please go do that. Take a copy of My Immortal while you’re at it, and deck Dumbledore for me that guy was fucked up.

I love you, anon.

13 notes • Posted 2021-03-11 19:59:12 GMT

#3

BOY IS HOME

19 notes • Posted 2021-01-21 20:01:11 GMT

#2

I did go and comment on Grian's last episode with some Ideas for S3 game mechanics, so here's what I put down for the fandom to chew on. I am 95% sure at least one of these will happen, because I all but predicted the red-life curse completely on accident, which means Apollo likes me, which means it might actually happen.

-Instead of 'all reds must cut off all their alliances', let them have One Ally, but that ally has to cut off everyone but the red person.

-Amplified world. Just because fall damage is the most entertaining way for folks to go when they're not pulling a Tango.

-Trying to summon Bdubs was too funny to not suggest that the spectators should be able to stay on and help and occasionally flip a lever even if they can't place blocks.

-Keep the change-your-skin-on-red thing we've got going. Eventually Grian himself will do it and I will die a happy man.

-TNT now has a 1/5 chance of spawning a Ghast 50 blocks above it when it explodes. -Wouldn't it be funny if there was an end portal somewhere in the map? I think it'd be funny.

-If you're on red, you should be allowed to hear the spectators if they're close enough to you, although I'd say prox chat for spectators to reds has half the radius that it normally does, so they have to be closer in order to be heard.

-Although honestly I just want to see more spectators getting to do what Bdubs did, and their series not necessarily being over if they permadie.

-You can give a life to a spectator to put them back on red... but only once, and you can't bring them up to yellow from there. Even better, there are three alternate totems of undying that do just this, but there's only three total, so only three dead can come back. (Makes the stakes higher in the endgame, especially assuming that season three will have more people. The infighting would be bloody glorious.)

-Please keep the boogeyman feature, it was so much fun.

(Another guy also suggested a Sworn Enemy system, where at the beginning of the game you're given a random person and you can't ally with them, or ally with any of their current allies. That would also be mega interesting. Imagine the angst if folks rolled their husbands from previous seasons.)

28 notes • Posted 2021-11-17 00:52:59 GMT

#1

I haven't touched my FR account in about two, maybe three years, and I've been diving in and out of art sales forum for about three days.

If you can draw humanoids (or even better can gijinka dragons based off the dragon and a description of what I'd like), have open slots, and you take gems, PLEASE reblog this post with a link to your art shop / commissions sheet. I have 29kg right now from liquidating about half my account. I've only sold half my dragons (I was an almost pure gen1 lair) and I have not yet listed the twenty-six pages of apparel I have.

I have a metric fuckton of gems. I have OCs that need art. Art sales forum has only given me a little luck. ;~; Help me, FR tumblr. You've been wonderful in the past, I'm counting on you now.

40 notes • Posted 2021-10-08 06:39:34 GMT

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