#and not 'this is an incredibly unhealthy situation for a child to be in. a kid shouldnt have someone elses wellbeing depending on them'

[mukuroom]

i cant blame fuuta for doing what she's doing but it's traumatising for a child to have someone depending on her so much, especially an adult...

[katerinaaqu]

Achilles being who he is could be a subject of his upbringing (and how CONTEMPORARY his case seems if one thinks of it!) - an Analysis

Soooo I got an amazing ask today here and got inspired for some random thoughts here!

Has anyone noticed that Achilles's complicated psychology might as well be a result of his upbringing and how incredibly MODERN his case can be? Think about it;

He was prophesied he would die early. His family of course was concerned about it (how similar it is to children born with terminal illnesses nowadays indeed!)

His mother was already worried given how she was immortal and she was already worried her son was mortal much more when she found out he would be short-lived

His father cared enough to fight his goddess wife but also to send him to Chiron, the man who was known to train the best heroes in hope that his son would get the best education but also be prepared for every terrible situation in his life

His mother dressed him up as a woman and hid him among women so that he would live

His father promised his hair to a river god in hope that he would escape his ill fate (how similar to parents who want their child to go for treatment abroad even if they know it is hopeless!)

One can say Achilles is a child ill-fated, already people overly-indulge him because of his natural talents but also his ill fate. He got his life settled for him one way or another. Built skills as spherical as possible (arguably even for his mother's charade he learnt some female roles as well!), he had the best education as a golden child (from the art of war till music and all) and exceeded in all but also he had his family always worried of him. He even had a companion by his side at all occasions to make sure nothing would happen to him. Arguably his withdrawal to Chiron in nature also shielded Achilles to remain pure from the intrigues of palaces, from actual talks of violence and war WHILE being prepared for war just in case he would need to use it!

But also if one thinks of it...

Achilles was a child of divorced parents. Thetis abandoned the already bad for her marriage with Peleus. Peleus who attacked her with accusations that she would hurt her own child, for example in Argonautica, when he saw her hold the child over the flames to make him immortal. His family loved him;

And yet his parents abandoned him one way or another in his young mind!

His mother abandoned him in Phthia when she divorced his father

His father abandoned him to Chiron to get education

Abandonment pattern became apparent in Achilles's life! Both his parents loved him he knew that very well. Both parents wanted to protect him almost to a suffocating degree. They shielded him from violence and all that could potentially bring violence such as intrigues and plans but they also prepared him for the worst all his life while his father was telling him to always aim for being noble.

Achilles learnt by them to care and love to almost an unhealthy degree. He could see people who loved him abandoned him! He was trying his best to be the golden child, the honorable one. The one who would bring pride to his noble father and his goddess mother and his god ancestors. And yet he felt people who loved him unconditionally abandoned him! No wonder he clang to Patroclus. He was the only person that would stick around; he was following him. He was his family, his friend, his companion, his squire and his everything basically. His love for him was unconditional. Achilles also probably expected that Patroclus would never abandon him; he would die after him!

Achilles was introduced to violence way too soon, way too quickly and way too definitive!

He was sent to conflict very quickly

He saw first hand how blasphemy affects humans

He witnessed a human sacrifice (or the attempt of it depending on the source)

He saw intrigue arguably for the first time in his shielded life

He caused a lot of slaughter at a bloody war that wasn't even his business

He had his honor, the one he was fighting SO HARD to maintain for it would be the only thing left of him

And finally he lost that ONE PERSON he was sure he wouldn't leave him all alone! And he lost him because of HIS DECISION to send him in his place!

No wonder how he broke down eventually. His mind which was already at a limbo state because of the expectations he felt he was carrying on his shoulders in combination to the overly protective love he received from his parents. He simply collapsed!

He committed all the atrocities one could expect a person pure as him wouldn't commit;

He wished other people harm even if he had a personal grudge against one person

He refused the heroic ideal in order to go home

He fell into an absolute emotional collapse when he lost Patroclus clasping a dead body for DAYS (miasma) and wouldn't allow anyone to bury him (technically disrespect for the dead)

He went to blind rage and killed many for the name of his lost companion

Utterly disrespected the dead by dragging Hector's body around with the aim of absolutely destroying them

Barrage of human sacrifices before or even after his death

Possibly attempt of rape of Troilus and his killing over an altar

Achilles seems to have completely broken down to every single thing his family wanted to prevent him from! It was as if all the sins he was taught to avert were introduced to him all at once and that was catastrophic for his mind and eventually Patroclus's death was the final stroke for his already fragile psychology! I feel like these ancient writers knew what psychology was before psychology was a thing because man! One can get mind-blown every single time!

Next time someone says that these ancient poems are "out of date" or that they are "not connected to our reality" please think of stuff like this! I mean how can one get more contemporary than that!?

My other analysis on Achilles: Achilles and Patroclus relationship "Devil's advocate" reasons (under a post by @justvea18) On Achilles being on the edge On silence and Achilles's expression of emotion (inspired by @deadbaguette)

To gather some more Achilles potential squad: @hermesmoly , @h0bg0blin-meat , @deadbaguette , @greeknerdsstuff , @smokey07 , @wolfythewitch , @achillesisnotcomingdown , @emmikay , @superkooku , @captnbunnie , @ri-dumb-fck , @hymnoeides , @cynicalclairvoyantcadaver , @venomspecs , @roachcicle , @mt-isnothere12 , @mythology-lover , @mythology-loving-lee , @kindred-spirit-93 , @dionysism , @margaretkart

If I forget someone forgive me please join us!!!! Also please join the profile of my friend @yararts for other type of amazing stuff!

[mothwingwritings]

WOW!!! I LOVED "The Innocent Act Of Dredging Up The Past", IT WAS VERY GOOD!

I wonder how Y/N reacted when she found out she was pregnant and how Fox allowed herself to keep the baby because he doesn't seem like someone who likes sharing attention.

Thank you so much darling!!! I am so glad you asked me this because I have been thinking about Ren as a father nonstop since that request. My brain has been full of many thoughts and opinions and I am happy to have an outlet for sharing lol. That being said, forgive my blathering. ^^;

(18+ and warnings for noncon, pregancy/baby birthing talk, incredibly unhealthy relationships, abuse, and being kidnapped/held against your will.)

Being impregnated by Ren would be absolutely dreadful for you, causing you to spiral into a pit of fear and despair the moment you miss a period or begin to feel queasy in the morning. With the signs starting to show, your brain comes to the instant conclusion that you are with child-his child, and it frightens you like nothing else before. At first you try and convince yourself nothing is wrong, that you are probably just late due to stress, and your upset stomach can be any number of things, it doesn’t necessarily mean you are pregnant. Any of your symptoms can be explained away by something else, so in an effort to try and maintain your sanity your brain churns out explanation after explanation, no matter how nonsensical they may be, in hopes of calming your rampant nerves by coming to some other resolution. A stream of constant lies and false reassurances play on repeat in your brain, forcing the thought that you may actually be a mother to the farthest reaches of your mind.

But the longer you wait and the more you dwell on it, the more you are faced with the inevitable. He never wears protection, you haven’t had access to birth control, and despite your warnings of it being a delicate time of month for you, his base instincts always won out in the end. There was nothing else this could be.

Faced with the reality of the situation, you were now tasked with the burden of sharing the news with Ren. You didn’t want to tell him, terrified of what his response would be, worried that he would somehow blame this all on you and hurt you because of it, quite possibly worse than he ever has before. But an even more horrifying concern than that is if the news actually pleases him. What if he wants to keep the baby? What if you were forced to carry this pregnancy to term while trapped in this grim environment, left to raise another human that shares half their dna with a man who has done nothing but cause you irrevocable damage?

No matter what the outcome, none of them are favorable.

But you didn’t have a choice, and you knew it was better to break it to Ren sooner rather than later, lest this whole nightmare become irreversible. In the event he saw things your way, you wanted this thing out of your body as soon as possible (though you loathed to consider what strings Ren would pull to achieve this, and what backwater procedure would be done to do so).

At first Ren brushes it off, not truly believing your concern. He’s had sex with you countless times without protection and just now you get pregnant? Seems suspicious, so he concludes you’re either overreacting or trying to get a rise out of him, potentially both, and that in and of itself riles him up. Are you telling him this as some kind of ploy? Are you using a false pregnancy as a means to get him to ease up on you a bit or as an attempt at escape? After all you had gone through together, after all the love he has lavished upon you by sharing his home, his life, his heart, with you… Would you really tell a lie like this?

He struggles with that possibility. Despite his inclination to feel otherwise, he has a hard time believing you would use a pregnancy scare for your own selfish benefit. You have always been a good girl, his good girl, and deep inside he knows this is not something that is within your nature to do, even if he does have some major doubts.

So, though he doesn’t truly believe your claims, he buys the pregnancy test more as a means to shut you up and prove a point than because he actually believes you. Needless to say, he ends up biting his tongue over that one.

When hit with the truth, his emotions are mixed. On one hand, he wants nothing to do with children or child rearing. He didn’t have to do much of a self-assessment to recognize he would be a shit father, and he never particularly wanted to be a father to begin with. His own upbringing wasn’t the best, he himself never really having a father figure that was worth a damn to guide him or show him any love or support. He had no parenting manual to go off of, and was sure that a culmination of having no positive family experience and maturing into the warped individual he had become led to no other conclusion than NOT being cut out for fatherhood in the slightest.

More than that however, the thought of sharing you, even with a life he helped create, really REALLY pissed him off. Thinking of all the nights you would be spending tending to the baby when you could instead be wrapped up in his arms, or all the attention and affection you will be giving some inept kid that could instead be going towards him, truly gets under his skin. He doesn’t WANT to share you. You’re HIS. And while a baby isn’t going to change that, he doesn’t want the needless competition to begin with.

But on the other hand, having a baby does have its appeal. It would be nice to bring a life into this world that loves him from the get-go, completely relying on him while being totally oblivious to all that has happened in the past. That sort of pure, blind love is hard to come by in this world, and the fact that he could obtain it so easily from a life he created with you, a human that has your blood running through its veins, is EXTREMELY appealing. And on top of that, you are sure to love the child whether its conception was wanted/planned or not. If you loved a child that was half his for the remainder of your life, would that not bind you to him for just as long? Though he didn’t doubt your loyalty (or his ability to keep you tied to him with no hope of escape), it would be a nice assurance to have in the rare event things did not end up going his way.

Once that thought enters his head, it’s over. No further thinking or future planning is required-he is going to be a father, and YOU are the beautiful mama! Congratulations! (Does he get off to you being pregnant? Did this pregnancy make Ren Hana realize he has a breeding kink??? Sources say yes and that’s your problem to deal with now. :))

♡

Holding his newborn for the first time, he has never been so nervous. Tears flood his eyes as he watches the small bundle squirming in his arms, his heart aching as they stare up at him with wide, pure, inquisitive eyes. He was no stranger to ending lives, but creating them? This was something entirely new, as exhilarating as it was scary. His smile grew as he stared at her small face, pleased that she looked so much like you. He could only hope that her personality would mirror yours as well.

♡

As time passes and the baby grows, you find out quick that Ren has a very ‘hands off’ way of parenting, which is to say he relies on you to do most of the work. And honestly, he feels that is fair. He’s the breadwinner who works hard to provide for you and the newborn, which leaves all other parental duties in your capable hands. You are left to be the child’s main caregiver, their guiding force to lead them through life, their teacher, confidante, and friend. It’s a daunting task, all residing solely on your shoulders.

Ren won’t readily admit it, but he much prefers it that way. All the abuse that he has suffered through from an early age, every heinous act of violence that has been carried out by his own hands (your wounds, included), all of it has turned him into something unrecognizable, something grotesque. Even if he wanted to have more of a presence in his child’s life, he knows he doesn’t deserve it. If he had too much sway in the kids development there’s a good chance they will grow up to be like him in some way or another, which would be a waste of all the love and hard work that you had put into raising them into being an upstanding person. Ren had made peace with who he had become, but that didn’t mean he wanted to keep a cycle that someone like Strade had begun going either.

So, the baby more or less becomes your soul responsibility, and god is that a burden for you. It’s bad enough that you have such little support from Ren to begin with, but the fact that this is YOUR first time being a parent as well makes it all so much worse. You have no idea what the hell you are doing, and with Ren making sure to keep you as isolated as possible you had no one else to turn to for help, either. It was just you and this brand new life with no one else to rely on, if you fucked up in even the smallest way it could be devastating to the baby. If your daughter got truly hurt, sick, or worse in your care, you didn’t know how you would live with the repercussions, let alone handle Ren’s reaction.

If your life with Ren hadn’t already made you a strung out, nervous, irritable wreck, being a mother certainly would. As she continues to grow, Ren refuses to discipline the child at all, not wanting in any way to appear like a ‘bad guy’ to your daughter. Given the circumstances, part of you is thankful for that (you honestly don’t know what you would do if he turned his ire towards her), but it also just makes things more difficult with you. You are already beyond stressed about trying to raise a child in this type of environment, having no united front and constantly butting heads makes raising her that much harder, especially when any kind of rule you attempt to establish can so easily be overridden by her father who has no remorse over the frustration this causes, nor care as to how his flippancy may affect your child’s development in the long run.

It’s also not lost on you that being the sole disciplinarian also paints you in a less than favorable manner in your child’s eyes, something you are sure Ren has thought about as well. Being the ‘strict’ parent means your child will be more likely to hide things from you, or seek out her father instead of you for support, approval, and advice. Given whom Ren was as a person, this thought didn’t sit particularly well with you.

All you can really hope and pray for is that somehow despite the lack of social interaction and outside influence she will grow up to be a decent human. Even maturing under the delusion that her father is a noble man, even if in some instances you have to make yourself the villain, as long as it helps her out in  the long run you’ll do everything you can to insure your daughter lives the best life she possibly can, whether her father helps you or not.

I think the REAL problems will begin when the child gets older. When she truly comes into herself and forms her own opinions, develops her own personality, and starts to forge her own way of life… It’s gonna be messy. :/ Your child’s autonomy is definitely going to be a point of contention for Ren in the future, and he won’t be so pleased if/when she catches on to his true nature and begins to rebel or straight up reject him. God forbid she tries and join forces with you or attempt to become your savior. It’s going to take a lot of cunning on her end to make it out unscathed.

Also, I kind of touched on it previously, but Ren would be incredibly horny the whole pregnancy. Not that he isn’t already incessantly slavering over you, something about seeing you round and full just makes him snap. Which is scary in its own right, Ren isn’t the most gentle of lovers to begin with and has a tendency to lose himself more often than naught, hurting you in the process. It’s a constant struggle to satiate him while protecting yourself and the unborn baby, best of luck to you! :D

(And he’ll definitely breastfeed from you. He’s gotta make sure you are producing enough for the baby, ya know? :))

[hwnglx]

he had so much to say, and has such self-degrading tendencies that even his green flags came out tainted in this negative light.. so the lines were a little blurred ㅜ

wonbin's real personality behind the scenes

based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!

+ so, very early into the reading, i got this vibe of a “protected child” who's been thrown out into the real world, and is trying his best to find his way and place. wonbin has quite pure energy, he's someone who's kinda obsessed about constantly doing what people expect of him, or want him to do. he's so incredibly focused on always meeting people's expectations, that he's still not entirely sure of who he is beyond that; his “true” self persé. his personality is basically the result of what others want him to be, need him to be or see him as. (his energy somewhat reminds me of a more emotional young jk) he sees his own self in the eyes of others, meaning people's opinions have a huge effect on his self-image, which can become a little unhealthy for someone in the public eye, who's out there left vulnerable to be criticized by the audience left and right. he has so so much pisces and libra energy in him, it's crazy. if you asked wonbin “what are your strengths?” it's likely he'd ask what you think his strengths are, and nod his head saying “yeah, that's probably right.”

interesting thing is, he has an abundance of drive and determination. a lot of achievements he's aiming for, so much ambition. but he's very worried about coming off too strong to people. his own “selfish” desires, which basically everyone has, can weigh on him because of this. he doesn't wanna overwhelm anyone, or have anyone think he's too greedy.

wonbin is honestly, one of the few energies i've read for now, who seems to genuinely care for the people around him, which is why he has the tendency to adjust his behavior according to other people's needs. i remember in the reading i did about riize's feelings towards seunghan, wonbin was one of the members who felt sincerely sad about the situation, and it made him look back on himself a lot. this seems to be a pretty good depiction of the type of person he is. i could see the members in this reading here as well, i just think he bases so much of himself on what he can do for the people that depend on him. he wants to be this figure of generosity and kindness, but he's still so.. scared of doing too much, people being bothered by him. i'm in his energy, and he's just nervous.

i'm also getting a lot of voices telling him how he should behave, how he has to be this star and main character in the group, how he has to be the stan attractor, and wonbin just suffers under that pressure, because it doesn't exactly suit his personality. he's very charming and attracts people easily, but he isn't boisterous, or someone who loves being the center of attention all the time. he wants to be comfortable giving others the spotlight sometimes. however, he doesn't wanna disappoint anyone, and truly thrives off of public validation, so.. it's just difficult for him to navigate it, i can feel him being caught up in a dilemma here.

he just seems like this young and clueless guy not even sure of who he is yet, being thrown out into an industry that basically forces a certain image on him, so now he's just running with that. he's like “oh, you want me to be the attractive and flirty guy? okay, i'll act like him then. oh, you want me to be the mysterious and quiet guy? okay, i'll become him then.” that's the energy he seems to be in right now. but, i can truthfully see this changing as he matures. his energy is very young still.

- he's just walking emotion. soooo so emotional. he can give off the impression of being emotionless, but there's an actual turmoil in his head. he takes things personally a lot, even constructive criticism can hurt his heart, which can make him insecure. he deals with a lot of insecurities behind the scenes, many thoughts and concerns about not being enough for people, not meeting expectations. he's an overthinker who's stuck in his head a lot, and can, as a result, make things worse for himself. create problems out of trivial things and dramatize situations in his mind, when from an outsider's perspective, it isn't nearly as bad. very anxious energy.

he can blame himself for many things, especially not living up to the person he himself wishes he was. he has this exact idea of the man he'd like to be (emotionally mature and intelligent, stable and dependable, grown up) and he has problems accepting his journey for what it is. like he wants himself to be at level 100 already, when it's a process, and only natural for him to be at like.. 20, considering he's still so young.

this seems to be a common trait of libra placements, but wonbin also has a habit of pushing down his thoughts and emotions a lot, avoiding negative situations. he doesn't always enjoy expressing himself. he's worried of it coming off wrong and people misunderstanding him. he is the type of person who can sound way more forceful than he actually wants to, just because he keeps bottling everything up and keeps trying to approach every situation peacefully, up until his emotions just come bubbling out of him in this aggressive manner. he doesn't have any bad intentions, but can give a wrong impression to others in this way.

i can also sense a certain struggle with fame he could be experiencing at this moment. it feels like the rose-colored glasses are fading, and fame is starting to become less appealing and “glamorous” as before, the harsh realities of it are making him a little uneasy. he might've expected and imagined it to be different, and is beginning to realize the shallowness behind the concept of fame. it can feel fake and superficial to him, not as fulfilling as its made out to be.

[protect-edwin-at-all-costs]

"Those memories are not why I chose to stay here. I still have a purpose. I'm a dead boy detective!"

Charles hates the memories of his life. He only stays because of his purpose as a Dead Boy Detective. He only stays because of Edwin. Hes clinging onto that purpose with dear “life”.

"Why are you all looking at me like that? I did that for us. She was gonna take us."

And all the response he gets to that is "Charles, that was... extreme."

By Edwin, the reason he’s still here. His sole reason for fighting this hard, telling him his actions were uncalled for.

And he can’t help but laugh at the sure ridiculousness of it. Apparently, he’s overreacting. He doesn’t understand it at all.

"So was me dying at 16 mate... I don't want to be dead. I hate it."

"But everyday, I'm fucking smiling."

Of course the rest of this scene is very important BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT IM HERE FOR THIS TIME

You wanna know what Charles' official essense it? Are you sure you're ready for it?

His base ESSENCE as a character is that he wants to LIVE, and that thing was taken away from him far too soon. He was born in 1973. Technically, he’s gen x. He could have still been alive, and he could even have had a family. But he was beaten and killed as a school boy, a fucking child they never got a chance to move past those issues and do great things with his life.

He stays on earth to feel alive, anything to keep from moving on. Charles still hasn’t accepted his death, and Edwin and being a Dead Boy Detective is what keeps him on earth because they make him feel alive.

Edwin is his reason for staying on earth, his sole reason for 35 years, but he’s also a constant reminder of death. Edwin is a complex double edged sword that has kept him afloat this long, while also forcing him to keep up happy appearances for Edwin’s sake, and that’s so incredibly sweet, but also unhealthy and unsustainable.

This is why he’s so obsessed with Crystal. Alive, talking to him, making him feel seen, allowing him to pretend to be alive for just a moment before he has to accept reality.

Anger of life

Resentment of death

Helpless to change anything about his situation, and whenever he tries he gets told her overreacting or “acting off.”

Refusing to accept the past, present, or future for himself.

[aluraveil]

What Goes Around, Comes Around

Sypnosis: Pantalone gets back at his childhood bully (aka you, the Reader).

TW: Massive warning for bullying, talks of poverty, forced relationships, abuse of power, unhealthy power dynamics, etc.

Pairing: Yandere Pantalone x Reader

-

There’s an old saying that what goes around, comes back around eventually.

You on the other hand, never cared too much about that saying.

Growing up a child from an extremely wealthy family meant that you had no worries about the consequences of your actions. If you ever messed up badly, it could all be erased with just one snap of your finger with the power of mora. Mora was everything in the world of Teyvat, there was nothing you couldn’t achieve without it.

You also never had to worry about when your next meal would be coming from, or if you would even eat at all the next day. In fact, you were so carefree in your life and you did what normal children would do. You would love to play outside and especially at a local playground near the town park.

However, you couldn’t say the same for a certain boy you would often run into on the playground.

The boy liked so malnourished that you could practically see his bones. His clothes were nothing but old, dirty rags. His hair was extremely disheveled and his skin was covered in scratches and dirt. The boy looks like he hadn’t eaten in days. You’d often notice the boy sitting on a wooden log staring at the ground.

Naturally the boy was an easy target for you and your two other playground friends to pick on. He didn’t have anything, while your family could give you the whole world if you simply asked. The three of you would torment that boy every single day. You all would often make fun of the way he dressed. One day, you actually learned the kids name which was Pantalone. Of course, you picked on his name as well.

“Your names Pantalone? It sounds like Pants! How funny considering the fact that you can’t even afford a pair of pants.”

It was the same torment every single day for the boy named Pantalone. He was destitute and living in poverty. He didn’t have anywhere else to go. He was suffering so many hardships and your friends picking on him didn’t make his situation any better.

When Pantalone managed to find a meal for himself to eat, he would often sit on the same wooden log to enjoy the food. He made sure to come to the playground at a time when you and your friends weren’t nearby. But oh boy, that’s what you and your friends were waiting for.

One of your friends decided to go up to the boy and immediately snatched his food out of his hands. In one swift motion, it was tossed into the trash can nearby. The look on Pantalone’s face was absolutely princely as he was shocked and he looked incredibly sad. You and your group found this hilarious as you both were hunched over on the grass snickering uncontrollably.

“Did you see the look on his face?”

“Yes, it was absolutely hilarious!” You replied gasping for air.

Everyday was the same torment for Pantalone. He would sit on the wooden log because he had no where else to go. And each and every single day, he would be ridiculed by your friend group. It was a whole routine for you guys. You would wake up in the morning, eat breakfast, play at the park with your friends, and relentlessly bully the poor kid.

However, your daily routine would eventually come to a close. Over the course of the next few months, you watched as your family’s business did worse and worse and gradually was close to being bankrupt. Your parents were exposed for fraud and their shady dealings. You watched as your lavish empire crumbled slowly and slowly, until there was nothing left. You could only sit in silence whenever your parents would have loud arguments about money troubles. You were a spoiled kid who was finally being shown the true reality of this world.

All of your expensive clothes and jewelry had to be pawned or sold off to scrap every last bit of mora they could get. Soon, your family was forced to sell their large house to move to an extremely cramped one with barely any space. You no longer could afford the once extravagant lifestyle you once knew. You were beyond sad, and most of all, you stopped visiting the playground out of embarrassment of the way that things in your life had turned out. Over the next few years, you lived in extreme poverty and most of the times, your family couldn’t afford a meal. Pantalone’s destitute reality was slowly becoming yours, and it was ironic how you picked on him for being poor while you were now living in the same conditions. You spent every last day feeling tormented over your immature behavior for bullying an innocent kid. You felt embarrassed and extremely ashamed of your actions.

You would soon spend the rest of your childhood living in poverty. Your family’s business never healed from the damage to their reputation and it was way too hard to recover from a drastic downfall like that one. It was also difficult to find work as well because most jobs weren’t even hiring, and they barely paid enough to buy your family a meal.

You head out to town one day searching for job applications when you notice a listing looking for maids to work for the Fatui.

Wait the fatui? You dig deep back into your memories as you’ve heard many things about the fatui from passing about the 11 fatui harbingers and how they’re notorious for being extremely dangerous criminals. Trying to work as a maid for them is equivalent to asking for a death sentence. But you checked the yearly pay and it was almost double the previous job posting you saw. It wasn’t quite enough to buy your family a meal everyday, but you could at least guarantee that you’d eat every other day. But your life could be in danger. What’s the point of even eating a meal every other day when you’re constantly fearing for your life in the fatui? But what other choice did you have? At the very least, you could guarantee that if you somehow died, you’d be one less mouth to feed and one less burden to your family.

And like the desperate person you were, you mailed your application to the mailing address and showed up for the job interview once you were accepted.

-

You didn’t expect the location to be a giant mansion. You stared in awe as you saw the beautiful fountain in the front lawn and the numerous gardeners taking care of the plants. It reminded you of your past life, and you couldn’t help but feel an eerily empty feeling in your heart. You were staring at your past life while wearing the dirty rags of your new life and you wanted to know if this would still be your life if things hadn’t gone south with your family business.

”A mansion..” You whispered quietly with your mouth wide open.

Suddenly, a woman walks up next to you, startling you a bit. “Hello Miss. Are you here for the job interview?” She asked politely but with a monotone voice.

“If so, please let me lead the way.” You nodded your head and you began to follow her inside the mansion.

You passed by many long hallways and you saw the hundreds of other maids all working, cleaning, sweeping, and tidying the mansion. None of the other maids even spared you a single glance as they were so involved in their work. You couldn’t help but think about how you used to be the one in charge of these maids back in your old life. You couldn’t help but shed a tear from these painful memories.

“The Lord Regrator’s office is right here. Please knock before entering. Best of luck to you.” The woman explained with a cold voice, you could tell she didn’t mean the last part. She sounded as if she said it out of habit and didn’t mean it. Nonetheless you shrugged it off because hey? Why should it bother you.

You knocked. The next couple of seconds that followed felt like an eternity. You don’t hear anything.

You knock for the second time, and finally you hear a “come in”.

You were instantly greeted with a man sitting at his desk surrounded by a lit candle and paperwork. You had to admit, the man was pretty attractive and you could tell that he was dressed in the latest fashion trends. He had long black hair, a signature white harbinger coat, and his glasses remained perched on top of his nose.

The Regrator looked up from his papers and smiled at you, “please take a seat.”

You felt extremely uneasy as you felt his gaze in you as you walked over. It felt pretty awkward and the atmosphere was uncomfortable. You could tell that things were pretty tense.

“I’m not going to waste your time by boring you, but to simply put it, I can’t hire you.” The Regrator said sternly and his warm expression turned into that of a dull one.

“..Huh? Why?” You stammered out confused. You came all the way here just for him to tell you that?

“Simply put, your clothes look filthy and you don’t quite deserve to work under me.” He said sternly.

What the actual fuck? Did he just.. say that to you? You were quite shocked and it took you a minute to even say something in reply.

“Please! I really need this job. I’ll do anything!” You desperately begged, “I don’t have a job and I need one badly.”

“You are so adorable begging me like that.” The Regrator looked at you with a dark look in his eye. “Oh how the tables have turned.”

Geez what a creep. What’s he’s even talking about now?

“I can tell by your expression you’re very confused by what I mean by the last part.” He continued,

“Say, do you remember a place known as Liyuen Park?”

You froze. The mention of that playground was enough to bring back all the horrible memories. You instantly thought of the boy you bullied and your old friends. Time seemed to stop for a moment as you replayed the memories over and over again in your head. Wait.. could it be?..

“Pantalone?”

“Right on the jackpot sweetheart.”

Oh Archons. The embarrassment that you feel right now got even worse. You wanted to dig a deep hole and crawl into it.

The power gap between you and Pantalone couldn’t get any bigger. You, the one living in poverty while Pantalone lived in luxury.

You instantly knew that you were so fucked. You were not only messing with Pantalone, but a fatui harbinger too.

“I’m so sorry-“ You were interrupted before you could finish your rambling.

“I don’t need your apologies darling,” Pantalone replied sweetly. “I hope you realize the dangerous situation you are in right now. I’m gonna make your life a living hell, and that’s a promise.” He said with a crazy glint in his eyes.

“Anyways, I was only playing with you. You’re officially hired and you start tomorrow.” Pantalone said with a smile, “Oh and we’re gonna have a lot of fun together too.”

“You’re dismissed.” He went back to his paperwork indicating that the conversation was over.

You gulped and walked out of the office. You couldn’t believe what just happened. You met the boy you bullied and turns out he’s your new boss now?

You walked home in silence as fear creeped inside your veins and clouded your mind.

Now you were really starting to understand the inevitable consequences of your actions and how your past deeds eventually caught up to you.

Afterall, what goes around comes around.

-

[wings-of-fire-confessions]

Hot take. Everyone needs to stop pointing at one character in Jade Winglet and be like “AH! They're THE asshole of the group! That one! That one specifically!” Because everyone is an asshole.

Moonwatcher won't shut the fuck up which causes people to feel bad (Reference; Winter Turning, Pg. 75) because, hypocritically, she only has a censor if it “benefits” (hard quotation because it has always failed her. Reference; Luna and Moonwatchers interaction) her.

Qibli is an ass, like, a HUGE ass. He pressures Turtle and berates the very thing he's self-conscious about. He's got massive main-character syndrome; he wants power, he always wanted power, but he wants COMPLETE control of power without any repercussions. One of the reasons he refused Darkstalker's offer was because he wasn't entirely sure he would slip something in there.

Winter is an ass, he literally attacks other dragons without thinking about it (Reference; Peril), he's quick to strike and like Qibli, berates Turtle for being “a waste of potential” to his tribe.

Kinkajou goes off on everyone's backs and uses the remnants of the magic scroll to control and transform Darkstalkers against his consent or will. She has essentially killed him via poison. The whole book and DS character arc was trying to push through a narrative that you shouldn't control people, that you shouldn't take away their free will, and that you shouldn't transform their being into a form for your desire and comfort. Yet it's completely flipped on its head because Kinkajou wanted to be “a little silly” with her solution in ending the IceWing and NightWing conflict. She does exactly just this and that makes her part of the asshole list.

Turtle is inactive, his inaction causes a lot of problems for the others in a negative way in order to preserve his own self. He uses animus magic on Anemone just to make sure that he doesn't get any attention but this backfires and his sister is left not only being used as a WMD by Queen Coral, additionally, she is also left feeling alone in her magic. Turtle just sat on the sidelines as he actively watched Anemone get used like a tool by her mother and groomed by a disgusting snotball of a power-hungry political obsessed eel bbq dragon. His “neutrality” was incredibly toxic towards the upbringing of his sister. Yet, despite being the one guy everyone likes to pounce on and beat down he's probably the LEAST asshole character out of everyone in Jade Winglet. You can point at Turtle's issue of “not doing anything” and dig deeper to realize he's a child for one (an even younger child when he enchanted Anemone) and for two it's an unhealthy trauma response from his family. He has helped and supported every single Jade Winglet member in their “fall/on their knees” development and all he ever got in return was those to treat him like garbage (with Peril being the only one who wanted to help him and realizing how shitty animus magic is for him and attempted to make a situation better by ripping up the scroll with good intentions in mind).

Peril is probably the most self-explanatory but she tries. I can't really say anything else about the flaming toaster oven w/ the pizza box inside it dragon that not everyone else has said negatively about Peril before. She's uncontrollable and she constantly talks about hurting others, yak yak yak… Brownie points is that she's attempting to become a better person and trying to find her own path in life.

Now that everyone has run away typing furiously in the comments reblogging tags about this and that I want to emphasize that everything I said above is about CANON CONTENT. You can LOVE YOUR ASSHOLES!!! I personally LOVE MY ASSHOLES!!! There is nothing wrong with acknowledging that the protagonists that you read aren't the greatest people in the whole wide world. I know I wouldn't want to be in the same room as Peril if she was an actual person; with that said that doesn't mean she ISN’T my favorite dragon in the whole gosh darn freaking series. Winter is a bastard, I love Winter. Qibli is a bastard, I love Qibli. Moonwatcher… Actually, no. Moonwatcher can not. (this last one is a joke and a personal opinion, if I was to look at her into it retrospectively and have a positive thing to say I would say she's very neurodivergent relatable, and her power is very autism-coded.).

Jade Winglet is full of bastards.

I love my Jade Winglet bastards.

Stop being in denial and using “well I don't like [Insert Jade Winglet Member] because of what they did with [Insert Plot Point Here]” and accept that your favorite is a bastard. Tired of hearing about this rank system on who's more fucked up than the other and debating if they deserve love and respect for that. Ofc they do. They're your favs, y'all don't need to push or morally justify trying to like your favs by putting another Jade Winglet member down. You aren't impressing anyone or going “GOTCHA!” for this thought process.

Now stop fighting you cursed dragon hyperfixated disaster fandom. (/j)

Drops Mic

.

[ateez-himari]

PRAY : HIDDEN FOOTAGE

A more private aspect of the relationship between the industry's producing sibling duo as camera follows them behind the scenes.

June 26, 2024 (6:30PM)

CONTENT WARNING: This article contains mentions of parental loss following a car collision, discussions of mental health, allusions to suicidal tendencies and talk of an unhealthy childhood. Please read at your own discretion.

To celebrate the one year anniversary of an emotional collaboration that also served as the very first solo release of a talented vocalist, BANGTANTV in partnership with KQ ENTERTAINMENT uploaded a two part documentary showcasing the process behind the single 'Pray' by Agust D and Himari. Throughout the years people have come to build these siblings an untouchable reputation through the title 'Hands of Midas', in reference to their incredible musical genius, so it was only natural for netizens to be interested in their work behind the scenes. However, it seems as though they received much more than they had bargained for when heartbreaking stories of the past were recalled by the artists to explain the mindset of each track.

In order to help viewers understand why the pair resemble each other in such a striking manner despite being linked legally rather than through blood, a short rundown of their history was given in the first few minutes. Prior to the tragic accident both families were very close friends and due to this bond the rapper has been in his younger sister's life since her birth, later playing a huge role in raising her following the adoption. While their parents were not detached from their lives, they did work a lot, and with the eldest living his own life it was left to the remaining brothers to take care of her. The girl's biological sibling however was dealing with a lot of physical as well as mental difficulties at the time, which meant that he was in no state to carry out such a huge responsibility.

'I was left with a lot of injuries from the accident so I couldn't move much at the time, and the grief put me in a really dark situation. Because she was still very young she couldn't deal with it properly and was always happy instead...so I couldn't find a way to approach her to take care of her.' Hanzo said in an interview with Cosmopolitan Korea

This paved the way into the conversation that took place while each wrote their respective verses in the side track 'Snooze', and here is what we now know. The middle brother took ever chance available to come home to her, yet these moments were unfortunately few and far between, leaving the family's youngest with no other option than to grow up quickly in order to adjust to an independent lifestyle in the midst of grief. In the refrain along with the first verse Agust D talks about acknowledging life's hardships, some originating from the music industry, all the while reassuring whoever is listening that it is alright to show weakness and lean on somebody.

'They're [the lyrics] what I would have wanted to tell you back then but looking at them makes me realize how much I missed.' Yoongi admitted. 'I regret it a lot you know, seeing that the more I came home, the quicker you seemed to grow up. You saw a lot of things because of me, all of them I wish to take back.'

The last piece of this statement was lightly touched upon in later footage, revealing that the young woman was made to take care of her brother rather often due to him being stuck in a very dark place at the time, leaving him too mentally distant to raise her, with certain anecdotes suggesting she might have been witness to events that were traumatizing for a mere child. While no speculations will be made on this very delicate matter, it is clear that something much deeper has bonded these siblings together, as the man who very rarely cries on camera could be seen tearing up holding his sister.

'When I listened to The Last, I remember throwing up afterwards.' Himari recalled. 'The emotions were just too much and I think it was my body's way of dealing with them, since I never truly got closure. I was terrified back then, having to pull you out this often, but I don't blame you for it. If anything I feel relieved that someone was there at the time, even if it had to be me.'

With the discussion that followed being extremely personal we have decided not to summarize it, so for those who wish to listen, it can be found at the 25 minute mark in the first part of the documentary which can be found on BANGTANTV. We advise viewers to watch at their own discretion as it contains mentions of attempted suicide and deep childhood trauma, as well as heavy mental distress. What can be said in short however is that we now understand why the maknae tends to act childishly, as there was never truly a time in the two year period preceding training that she had the opportunity to live as one.

While devastating aspects of their past were unraveled, most pieces of footage filmed on personal cameras managed to heal viewers' hearts as they showed their healed relationship, from playing around while creating to going out to cafes or PC bangs. Multiple instances of the young woman falling asleep on the couch in her brother's studio have been reposted on social media, as it led to the rapper caring for her as one would a child, demonstrating the amount of attentiveness he holds towards her.

'I raised her, so there's something more in how I see her.' He said in episode 20 of Suchwita [with Taemin] 'It's not a parental link or anything...but it feels like it sometimes.'

This nearly fatherly care for his sister was demonstrated through an anecdote in which her difficulties navigating the music industry with a near deaf ear were talked about, leading viewers to learn that due to the family's low financial status they were unable to afford a hearing aid for their youngest, seeing as they already had to pay the hospital fees. The girl being fully aware of their predicament had never mentioned need for it, yet Yoongi rapidly caught on to the struggles this new impairment brought into her daily life, such as extreme fatigue along with splitting headaches and so he set aside money following every paycheck earned during his delivery job.

'The song that fits us the most...' Himari pondered over the question asked in a solo segment. 'Maybe Mockingbird by Eminem, my brother used to play it a lot at home. There's a lot of regrets in the song, a lot of promises about protection and sacrifices just to make her [his daughter] life better. It was the same with us in a sense...I guess a good example is that back then he needed money but he saved so much just to buy me a hearing aid.'

That is not to say the youngest does not care for her brother to the same extent, as she would reassure the older artist by holding his hands when he talked about something especially painful, even wiping fallen tears whilst talking about how great a man he is. Food ordered for him would very quickly fill the studio and although claiming to have eaten well, the rapper finished every single dish, even accepting the soft pink blankets draped over him when producing sessions lasted into late at night. While not providing the same way as he had during their childhood, the vocalist shows her care through small actions that prove the amount of attention truly on him at all times.

Their heavy history is easily discernable from the way these artists embrace one another, as there never seems to have been a singular loose hug, never a moment where they did not treasure the simple fact of each other's presence. Although the rapper usually rejects skinship in front of cameras, he could be seen seeking it out throughout the documentary, always asking for a small kiss on the cheek whenever the youngest arrived or left. Sharp eyed netizens also noticed how the senior fidgeted with his rings when listening to the vulnerable lyrics written by his sister, while she on the other hand tended to zone out as if attempting to repress certain emotions.

Peace can be found through these pieces of media as the siblings have stated that despite these setbacks they have managed to find their own balance, and are now going about life with fresh scars rather than carrying old wounds. Strangely enough, having these many instances of them laughing with one another, both fandoms noticed that their smiles are practically identical which had led to sweet speculations about fate meaning for them to be one another's healing.

National Soccer Team Captain, Min Hanzo, made several appearances

With the relationship between the vocalist and her biological brother being kept away from the spotlight, it has left many wondering about whether they were truly close or if something was brewing behind closed doors that neither wished to address. This worry was however rapidly dismissed, as several videos of them inserted throughout this documentary reassured fans that the siblings' bond is even stronger than they had claimed it to be. While every single piece of footage was heart warming enough to spark conversations it was not what caught the attention of sharp eyed netizens, but rather a singular clip filmed by the rapper in which they could be seen playing basketball.

The reason behind the influx of speculative threads on the X platform was the fact that their scars from the accident seemed to complete one another's, as where the idol was marked on the right, her brother's much more prominent ones were on the left. The most popular hypothesis is that the older man would have allegedly pulled Himari into his chest in order to protect her from the impact, which seems rather convincing due to the fact that the difference in their injuries' visibility suggests he had suffered the brunt of the impact. Amateur detectives on social media also recalled that the soccer player had made a few references to the aftermath of this tragedy in the past, in which he recalls being impaired to the point of barely being able to move for days while his sister seemed to be relatively healthier.

Making History

While life has not favored these artists in their younger years, their current standing at the top of the industry reflects the diligence in the siblings' work ethic as several pieces of history have been written through their groups despite the incredible amount of challenges they were made to overcome. The senior idols are well recognized for having paved the way for future generations while their juniors are slowly catching up to their achievements, having become the first male group to perform at Coachella and the first k-pop act to grace the stage of Mawazine, the second biggest music festival.

'At times, staying in this career was terrifying.' Himari had said rather hesitantly. 'On more than one occasion I felt like it was the end, like the exhaustion was genuinely going to kill me the second I closed my eyes. So much went on behind the scenes, we would go from one schedule to another without rest and using oxygen masks to avoid fainting became common.'

Much more weight than simply performing rests on their shoulders as both hold the position of producer, alongside several members, which demands that they constantly create new melodies in the midst of their already overwhelming schedules. Their skills have no grounds to be questioned as other well renowned idols have turned to them for their own releases, the most blatant examples being soloist IU with Yoongi and SHINee member Taemin with Himari.

Closing Statement

This documentary was heart wrenching to say the least yet placed much more meaning on the single's tracks with clear connections to dark aspects of their past now being unlocked to the public, serving as a form of closure for these siblings as well. They have truly shown that trauma does not make up the entirety of an individual as both are now known for their intoxicating happiness, giving the audience a valuable lesson about mental health and healing.

REMINDER to keep streaming Golden Hour Part : 1 by ATEEZ and support Jimin's upcoming comeback 'Muse' releasing on July 19 at 1PM (KST) along with 'Type 1' photobook by V releasing on July 9.

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A/N; Please keep in mind that while Yoongi has talked about mental health in the past, this is not an accurate representation of what he has lived as this is purely a work of fiction!

[connorsnothereeither]

I know there's the whole AU of Ulysses being there with Aax when he washes up and the two of them meeting Rae and Ulysses immediately going dad mode on this very sad child, but, what would happen if they met Icarus at any point during that idea? be it with Rae or otherwise - how do you think Ulysses would react to them?

This is a very long answer sorry lol, but I think, completely and honestly, Ulysses would see young Icarus as a threat. Especially at that point in the timeline.

Not a threat that he would ever fight, but certainly a threat he needs to keep himself and Aax far away from. He would be incredibly afraid of the power that young Icarus wields. Because Icarus is not kind. Icarus would rat them out.

We saw in canon that Icarus, as a tween/teenager, is a really mean and shitty kid. Icarus is a bully. The kind of kid who would absolutely hand Ulysses over to the people he’s running from in a heartbeat, if they thought it was what Fable would want. If it would make Fable happy. They probably wouldn’t even spare them a second thought. And I think, especially knowing Rae and then meeting Icarus, Ulysses would pick up on that. He would pick up on the fact that Icarus is not kind to Rae. That Icarus is both a victim of the situation, and part of the problem. That there is no winning over Icarus while Fable is in the picture, because Ulysses could never combat Fable on his own. And trying to help Icarus would quite literally bring the wrath of god down upon him and his child.

While Icarus is certainly in an unhealthy environment too, Ulysses can’t do much to help, because unlike Rae, Icarus doesn’t want to leave. I could be misremembering things, but from what I know, at that point in the timeline, Icarus adores Fable. And treats Rae badly because of it. Ulysses isn’t exactly in a position to separate Icarus from that environment unless they leave willingly. Ulysses wouldn’t be able to trust Icarus the way he would Rae. And I think he hates the fact that he can’t; because it shows how much under Fable’s thumb Icarus already is at that young age, and how fragile Ulysses’ and Perseus’ own safety and existence is when they’re on the run. It’s not Icarus’ fault in any way, but Icarus is too much of a risk for Ulysses to trust. And honestly I think that Icarus would never choose to trust Ulysses in return. Because trusting Ulysses means admitting that Fable is bad. And I don’t think young Icarus would do that.

If it came down to risking the lives of Perseus and Rae in order to show kindness to Icarus? Ulysses wouldn’t take that risk. He wouldn’t let himself take that risk. He would feel awful about not being able to do more to help this child, it would eat away at him, but he would know he couldn’t do more, and why he couldn’t.

Trying to save Icarus would be a gamble in any situation. If it was Ulysses on his own, he would take that gamble. But not if he’s also gambling the lives of not just one, but potentially two young children, who are depending on him for safety. His own life is one thing. He doesn’t care about putting that in the line, especially to save another. But he wouldn’t let himself sacrifice any more innocent lives in the process.

[crownedhades]

this is a oneshot based on this headcanon i briefly talked about. keep in mind that this is purely self-indulgent and i dont care if i write them incorrectly, because thats not the point.

featuring: killer sans and horror sans.

t/w: eating disorder and being forcibly fed food. mentions of objectification. being babied as a grown adult. an incredibly unhealthy dynamic that is not for everyone. read with caution.

please remain respectful.

.°• ੈ♡₊˚•.

"you need to eat. now."

a deep voice with an all too familiar tone; a skeleton who was a head taller than him.

killer couldn't understand this man. he couldn't understand why horror was so adamant about him eating, or why he went out of his way every day to keep him on this schedule that he forced upon him.

he knew that neglecting himself was unhealthy. logically, he knew all of this. and yet, with his hand clenching his stomach, he kept his mouth shut. his eye sockets narrowed with a flicker of white flashing inside, a less obvious indicator of his emotional state.

no, what was more obvious was the bright red soul hovering above his chest, molding and whizzing into an uncommon shape that horror didn't see often. an upside-down heart that was scorching to the touch.

it wasn't the first time he's seen it, but it always confused him when he did. to horror, killer was a complicated creature with all sorts of mysteries. the kind of mysteries that repulsed him, as he instinctively knew where the red determination was sourced.

but it was moments like these... that allowed horror to see past the villain that killer has depicted himself to be. a sort of moment that reminded horror of an immature child.

a child throwing a tantrum.

as horror took a step forward, cornering the strangely small skeleton before him, he watched as killer visibly tensed up, scouring his mind for a way to flee.

his hp was low. it went from its usual 1 to a 0.6 in just the past few minutes. killer knew he shouldn't be struggling and that he should just suck it up and eat, but he couldn't do it. not when the mere thought of it overwhelmed him.

horror took another step, summoning a butterscotch-cinnamon pie out of his inventory. it wasn't his first choice to shove down killer's throat, but it was one of the rare sources of food that automatically maxed out your hp no matter the situation.

unhealthy and sugary, but it didn't matter. what mattered to horror was keeping this child fed.

killer's white pinprick darted to the pie, his expression becoming more tense. a nauseating wave of dread rolled past his shoulders as he spoke.

"you know... you act like you're supposed to be my dad. it's annoying, so fuck off already."

his voice was bitter and resentful. he didn't like being forced to eat anything. he'd rather die and wither away into a pile of dust than lose any sense of autonomy.

all horror was doing... was feeding into killer's self-hatred. because he knew he was being immature. but could you blame him? he was used like a rag doll by the player, and now his self-objectification returned whenever nightmare or anyone else forced him to do something against his will.

"if you don't eat, you'll die."

the second horror spoke these words, killer activated his magic in an attempt to teleport out of there---only for horror to grab his shoulder with his free hand, slamming killer against the wall.

"you need to eat." horror repeated, using his body weight to keep killer still as his large, boney hand moved to his teeth.

killer was now cussing and screaming, kicking his legs and thrashing around. he summoned one of his red knives, plundging it into horror's shoulder before pulling it out and repeating the action, over and over again, trying to keep horror away from him.

"let go of me, you gigantic freak!"

but horror didn't budge, using the tips of his fingers to pry open killer's teeth. then, he shoved the butterscotch-cinnamon pie into killer's mouth before forcibly shutting his jaw, keeping him held down.

killer's whole body was trembling, with watery tears mixing into the black tar-like substance leaking from his eyes. the taste of that sugary sweet pie made him recoil with disgust, letting out a frustrated scream while he was being forced to chew and swallow.

soon after, killer went limp when horror released him, falling to the ground with his hands covering his mouth. the knife still lodged into horror's shoulder.

horror stared at killer's hp bar, letting out a huff before feeling the red, glowing knife fizz away and disappear from his bones. killer deactivated his magic.

"next time, don't let it get this bad. or you might actually starve to death."

killer was not at all amused with horror. "why the fuck do you even care---you're just some overgrown piece of shit that---"

"i dont care." horror cut him off, his tone sharp. "i dont care about you, anyway. im just not going to stand around and let some immature child starve himself to death."

"i know youre an older version of myself, but im not a damn child---"

"you sure act like one."

killer... never knew how to retort against horror. at least not in these situations, where his mind is fogged and he can't think straight. it didn't help that his soul was molding back into phase one, where his constitution was far more weak than usual.

horror was an overwhelming monstrousity. the kind of person that didn't care if he triggered killer or poked where he shouldn't, as long as killer was fed and alive.

killer wondered if he should be lucky that horror never asked him any questions beyond getting him fed. he was the only person besides color and the boss thats seen him like... this.

and he hated that. hated horror.

"one of these days... im gonna kill you." killer swore, still tasting the lingering sweetness of the pie. his hp recovered to its full health.

horror rolled his red eye, unconvinced. "good luck with that. youll do us both a favor if you manage to succeed."

[inbarfink]

Simon loved Betty dearly, but he was always kinda passively ignorantly selfish in their relationship. Allowing Betty to be needlessly self-sacrificial while not really giving her anything like that in return because… he was just not really noticing the pattern or how unhealthy obsessed Betty was with him.

Simon’s tunnel vision and incredible level of ignorance about Betty’s obsession and infatuation is so clear when you compare Simon’s original narrative of Betty leaving him with what actually happened.

Simon was so sure Betty left him because he just said or did something so horrible that no reasonable person could still love him like that. She probably just left him and spent the rest of her pre-War days peacefully alone or with someone else. But Betty instinctively knew she would never do that, the only person she would leave Simon for, is Simon 

But ever since the double-whammy of being Cursed and Betty ‘leaving’ him made his self-image tank - Simon taught himself to love others in the same unhealthy self-sacrificial and codependent way that Betty loved him. 

First there was Marcy. Simon himself nearly directly say, in his very first scene in ‘Fionna and Cake’, that he would be a wreck without Marceline being around - as something to give him a purpose. 

And that purpose was pretty heavily tied in with a sense of self-sacrifice.

It… was a difficult situation, to survive and take care of a little child in the middle of a Magical Nuclear War with a cursed artifact that would have consumed his mind sooner or later. But all evidence suggests that Simon was maybe a bit too eager to use the Crown to protect Marcy. 

Maybe partly a magically-induced compulsion to use the Crown more and more, but also I think… he found his purpose in the idea that he’s going to sacrifice himself for Marcy’s sake. Even as it pained Marcy to see him like - even as she, a little girl, was trying to stop him.

And eventually… it got to the point where the only way to actually keep her safe was to leave her. 

A heartbreaking traumatic experience with a vital role within the rich tapestry of traumatic experiences that is Marceline’s life. 

And… it’s hard to say what he should’ve done in the situation, there’s probably not a scenario where everything works out perfectly. We literally saw what happened if he hadn’t put the Crown at all and it was not a pretty sight. 

Simon was doomed from the moment he found that Crown. But at the very least, keeping himself together through nuclear Armageddon by focusing all of his energy into saving Marcy is what burned that streak of self-sacrificial selflessness into his psyche.

We see it most within the Fionna and Cake storyline, of course, and how eager he became to doom himself again for the sake of someone else who needed him, but…Even with Betty herself, despite not even being around, with how obsessed he became with his ‘Princess’. By the end, winning back Betty’s love was the only motivation he could find to regaining his own mind. 

And then when he finally regained his sanity briefly, for the price of a very, very limited time left to his life

he decided to dedicate it all to apologize to Betty. There’s clear, like, parallels done with the Bus Stop scene, I think

But Simon wasn’t trying to convince Betty to come with him, or stay with Past Simon or even find out more about what happened to her - it wasn't about what he wanted, for once. He was just trying to give her some peace of mind and closure. He was sacrificing all of his remaining time on earth for that.

But at this point, all that ended up doing was reinforce their original unequal relationship dynamic. 

And actually lay the ground for the problems within it to grow worse.

[freakenomenon]

OKAY. I FINALLY HAVE ANOTHER ESSAY RANT THING BUT ITS NOT IHNMAIMS SADLY.

I find it so interesting how REAL the desperation in the delivery of other mother saying "DONT LEAVE ME, ILL DIE WITHOUT YOU." is,, of course within the nature of the beldams character you'd find yourself questioning the honesty of this statement.

i mean duh we're not the 11 year old hurriedly rushing away from an entity we'd briefly been attached to and found solace in. from the start, other mother seems eerie and just. OFF. but i find it endlessly interesting how progressively desperate other mother is for coraline to stay with her. its incredibly vague what other mother does to the previous children in the movie. most people interpret it as her LITERALLY eating the children or eating their souls. but it seems like there is genuine attachment there, although incredibly unhealthy. its there.

while talking with the cat, not only does it comment that it thinks the mother simply wants something to love other than herself. but i noticed coraline literally walks away from the abhorrent situation she's left to deal with, only to end up right back where she started. which I think is a representation of how unhealthy coralines escapism through this world is. she is being neglected of attention and rather than branch out, she retreats to a world that seems much more welcoming. but is just as unhealthy as the last. walk around the world.

this is coralines world. at this age, her house, her parents, her. attachments. thats her whole world, and even as she detaches from it. humans are creatures of habit, so she ends up in practically the same place. and personally i think that says a lot about the other mother as well. confined to the pink palace apartments, she seeks out children who are unhappy and gives them everything they want in exchange for them blinding themselves to their pasts and being entirely dependent on her. and with each child, they sew the buttons and allow her to literally love them to death. its all she has, she exists for this soul purpose. or at least that's what shes convinced herself. the gap she has between reality, tragedy and triumph, to carve something she believes as perfection to appease others is all she is.

and as each other child shattered beneath the weight of her affection and bent to her charm, coraline falters. she refuses. she DARES to believe shed rather go back to her real parents, to realize shes not too far gone. its unpredictable, it breaks that mask of delusion SHES blinded herself. BLINDED OTHERS with. and brings her back to the cold reality that is the blank void she's been confined to. between reality. where she can only create half baked imitations of what's around her and pretend that what shes made is better. but who else is there for her to impress? to help. to play with.

just like with coraline, now that shes moved and lost her friends. her parents are all she has left to cling to.

BUT IDK thats just my interpretation

[sugoi-and-spice]

Chapter Twenty-Six - The “Single” Life

Summary: Tomura Shigaraki was her dad’s boss’s son. He was the creep that stole girls’ underwear and tried to grope her in his room. But it’s not like he could get her Dad fired just because she wouldn’t sleep with him, right? …right?

CW: Quirkless!AU, Explicit Smut, Dub-Con, Coercion, Blackmail, Cheating, Sexual Guilt, Humiliation, Unhealthy Relationships, Virginity Kink, Groping, Power Play, Hate to Love, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Animal Death, Slow Burn, Misogyny

A/N: Thank you all again for your patience, kind words, and support while I worked on this chapter. It makes me really excited to bring this story over the finish line.

Read Full Chapter on AO3

[excerpt]

She woke up first, her internal clock set to the ass crack of dawn due to years of early morning swim meets. Usually she’d greet an early morning like this with a middle finger and a groan as she buried herself back into the abyss of her covers. But today, she was kind of glad she woke up early.

After all, how often was it that she actually got to see Tomura Shigaraki asleep in her bed?

It was a shame that he had so much trouble sleeping — for a lot of reasons of course — but right now, she couldn’t help but think it was especially tragic due to how cute he looked asleep. The handsome details of his face, that were typically so hidden by his anger — those long lashes, full lips, well-defined jawline, and of course that wonderful little beauty mark — they were glowing now under the soft light slipping through her curtains. He was so at peace, not a furrow in his brow or a frown line in sight. So natural, hugged by her valley of fluffy pillows and blankets. Surrounded by comfort.

She decided to take the risk of moving some of his hair out of his face, those surprisingly soft locks curling delightfully around her fingers. The palm of her hand brushed against the skin of his cheek, awakening her to another discovery. The skin around his cheekbones was actually surprisingly soft, not dry and crusted like she’d always assumed. Just raised from the scarring, from a lifetime of self-abuse.

It was incredible to think about. In just a day, so many of her preconceived notions about Shigaraki — the texture of his skin, the idea that he’d never apologize, the selfishness she so deeply associated with him — it was all proven so incredibly wrong. And it had her realizing just how little she truly knew about Tomura Shigaraki.

And how excited she was to learn.

He stirred awake then, and she found a brand new favorite look on him. His dazed, dreamy expression as he slowly came into consciousness. Eyes fluttering open, lips smacking gently to regain some moisture. A moment of disoriented wonder as he recognized that he wasn’t in his own room. But then a contentedness settled in its place as he realized that he was more than okay with the room that he was in. He happily buried himself back into the bed as he found some still half-asleep comfort in the covers.

She smiled, burying herself back under the covers with him, nuzzling her forehead just inches away from his own.

“Sleep well?” 

“Yeah…” he breathed, dreamily.

Then suddenly his eyes snapped wide open, the realization hitting him hard. He shot up to a sit with a speed that made her jump a little.

“Woah! What’s wrong?” she asked, sitting up to meet him.

“What time is it?”

“Huh? Well uh…” she took a quick look at her phone, “Like 6:30?”

He looked down at the covers, at himself in the covers, and really just tried to take that in.

“We… slept through the night?”

She smiled a little sadly at the utter disbelief in his voice. The idea that sleeping through the night was not normal for him. 

“Yeah,” she said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, “Yeah, we did.”

Shigaraki looked back at her, and sobered from his shock quickly as he took something else in from the situation. They’d had sex last night. No, not just sex. If there was such a thing as making love, Shigaraki couldn’t believe it was anything else then what they’d done. They’d shared their feelings (however indirectly). Shared sacred details of their pasts. Held each other close and then fell asleep in each other’s arms. What they’d done together last night was different than anything else before. It was real. It was something they had to talk about. 

But that neither was really ready to.

His sense of security and comfort went as soon as it came when he realized that. 

God, what the fuck had he done?

Continue on AO3

[ihopesocomic]

in my honest opinion, No Contact as a chapter belongs in a museum. It's very rare that any piece of media confronts the notion of disowning your parents, much less being portrayed as perfectly acceptable when you've absolutely had enough. I was so tired of seeing media that handles abuse push this notion that you should forgive your abuser if they're a family member. I'm not suggesting that forgiveness is unhealthy, just that it's very nice to see a entirely different perspective on things!!

Ahh thank you so much, anon. This is truly flattering to hear.

It's certainly a tough topic to cover. Like you say, we just wanted to tackle the whole concept of going no contact with abusive family members. People may try and argue that this is us saying forgiveness isn't healthy and to always keep up your walls but... we're not?

The fact of the matter is that going no contact is an incredibly stressful and upsetting thing to do and yet the media never covers it because cutting off your family members for life is firmly seen as wrong by society. Forgiveness is all well and good but it's seen as the default in situations where it absolutely shouldn't be, sometimes to the detriment of the victim.

And that's why we felt compelled to cover it and say that no, sometimes it's perfectly OK to put yourself first. Especially when you've been forced into that situation in the first place.

I wasn't forced to cut off my biological family. They did it themselves by being fantastically ableist and not caring about my existence. Yet I was firmly portrayed as the bad guy for returning their disinterest and denying their opportunistic attempts to 'connect' with me because they feel bad and wanted validation. And I was a child, to boot.

There's just an unhealthy focus on how family is family no matter what in today's society and yeah no, I'm certainly going to use my own story to deconstruct that notion. And I'm very glad to hear it touched you, anon. c: - RJ

[for-those-who-wait]

Would love to see more of your android Hunter au! Love the idea it just won’t leave my head…

A question I would have for this is Hunter still like a replica of Caleb? Sorta like an Astro boy type thing going on here or what? If so what’s the story behind that if you are willing to share.

Never played become human, despite years of saying I will bc it looks made for me jksskkm, so sorry if I’m missing something there.

Yes I'm so glad!! I'm a very big fan of it and I am very tempted to write something for it (I too have been possessed)

The short answer is that Hunter was made in Caleb's image—as close as Philip could get! Very much an Astro boy situation where he's made as a sort of replacement that was programmed to experience, interpret, and interact with the world exactly as a human would.

As for the long answer and the story behind it, my thoughts are "take canon and replace witches with androids" and that's your initial argument between Philip and Caleb. I haven't thought about it too much but my initial idea is that before the revolution, they both lived in Detroit and worked with androids, and both worked at CyberLife (Caleb because he's naturally fascinated with them and Philip because he's just following in Caleb's footsteps [call it brotherly bonding or unhealthy obsession, take your pick!]), but it's Caleb that sees the early signs of deviancy and sees something more within androids that Philip just can't fathom (that being the capacity for free thought and will). Philip sees this as a betrayal—How dare you see humanity in these machines! How dare you try and extend the sanctity of the human soul to these inhuman bodies of plastic!—and like in canon, he kills Caleb for that betrayal.

Now this all happened in the late 2010s and early 2020s because for some reason, Detroit: Become Human is in a technologically advanced version of our world where CyberLife was founded and androids were first created in 2018 (the actual game and android revolution take place in 2038). I think it would be a few years until Philip does kill Caleb, let's say 2027 or so (because androids pass the Turing test in 2022 and 2027 is the year that a million androids have been sold, so the concept of deviancy was able to marinate a bit and I think that's enough time for the signs to start popping up and for Elijah Kamski, the CEO of CyberLife, to start being weird and existential about it).

So it's 2027, Caleb is dead, Philip is never considered a suspect, is never tried, and the murder is never solved. He is so incredibly not well (my man needs magical levels of therapy and his ass is not getting it). At this point, Philip has been working at CyberLife long enough to have a pretty high status. He totally has the authority and the power to request a custom android to be built off-the-books, probably because of threats or blackmail or whatever other abusive tactics he can pull as a superior to most employees at the company. Because it's freaking weird to make a child android in the image of your brother that was mysteriously murdered.

But Hunter is made like a regular factory-set android with no personality, no emotions, etc. but Philip of course knows exactly how to fix that (he's been working at CyberLife for nine years, he can do these things). It's his version of a sort of middle finger to Caleb, giving an android emotions and free will. Kind of like "Hey, you know how you thought androids were capable of having human emotional intelligence and conscious individual thought and a soul and humanity? Well actually I'm going to give these 'emotions' and this 'humanity' to your android and show you that they aren't real." And he does this by just being the absolute WORST android/child/whatever caretaker in the existence of the entire world in every single possible way because "See? Its blood is blue and it's not dying when I bloodlet it, it's clearly not human. Ah, see how it's become completely catatonic as a result of repeated trauma? Clearly this is just malfunctioning software. It's obviously just broken. See, Caleb? See how wrong you were about androids having humanity?" This man is evil and stupid

Hunter doesn't have Caleb's memories or anything, and let's call the tooth gap a manufacturing error from doing things under the table that Philip (who doesn't do chassis repairs) can't fix without CyberLife setting off alarm bells. It's probably in 2028 or 2029 that Philip packs up and moves to Gravesfield and that leads to the rest of what I talked about in my other post, where Hunter is completely isolated and kept ignorant of the ongoing revolution come 2038, and still doesn't obtain freedom until a long while after that

Thank you for the ask!! I will happily ramble about this AU whenever somebody asks about it. You should totally play the game if you can. I'll be the first to admit it's got issues as a civil rights allegory (thanks, director David Cage) but it is a fun time and such a cool concept and the characters are great and we love Detroit: Become Human in this house. Sorry if any of the terms weren't explained well, I will happily specify more so if anything is unclear, just let me know! Planning on making more content for it at some point :))

[radical-revolution]

THE HEALING POWER OF ANGER

For much of my life, I repressed my anger.

I never allowed myself to truly feel it, express it, or share with anyone that I was angry, upset, or anything less than “okay.”

I was a “good boy.”

I was a “nice boy.”

(Except really, I was an angry boy.)

I had been taught—and this was my trauma—that anger was bad, shameful, unspiritual, and a sign of weakness. On top of that, I felt a narcissistic need to protect an image of myself as kind, caring, compassionate, and very, very spiritual, free from any hint of anger.

Science is now showing that people-pleasing, anger-repression, and stuffing down all the life inside of us is incredibly harmful to our health, contributing to and exacerbating a myriad of illnesses and chronic conditions.

When we repress our anger, we repress our life force, our passion, our sexuality, our discernment, our fire. We throw the baby out with the bathwater in our pursuit to be “nice.”

“Nice” is a lie, in that sense.

It was both terrifying and liberating to start allowing myself to feel and express anger in healthy ways. Saying “no” when I meant no, becoming okay with upsetting, disappointing, and even angering people, setting healthy and fierce boundaries, and allowing myself to fully grieve the past.

Giving that inner child full permission to grieve and cry and truth-tell his way into love. Being my authentic self.

I stopped acting out of guilt and shame and allowed myself to walk away from people and situations that didn't serve me or align with my highest ideals.

I stopped allowing anger to control me.

I stopped trying to save everyone and pretending to be the “nice guy.” I let go of the need to be seen as compassionate, spiritual, and kind.

None of that is my business. How people see me.

I stopped caring what people thought of me. This was the most liberating thing of all.

This journey through the healing portal of anger has been deeply liberating and has unlocked so much energy.

Anger is good, you see. Anger is healthy. Anger is not unspiritual, harmful, unhealthy or bad when you finally find out how to unlock and harness its awesome power.

Anger will heal you to the core if you let it, and will unlock the true mysteries of compassion.

- Jeff Foster