#and if people ARE weird I can just not engage with them. there's. I can decide for myself!

[lurks-no-more]

Also - there being problematic stuff in the art or the books or the shows you like does not automatically mean you should drop them, or that you are a bad person. You just have to consider things and come to

For example: Howard Phillips Lovecraft is a seminal writer of weird fictio, who has influenced and shaped the fantasy, horror and SF genres, and the general pop culture, of the 20th century like few others. He was also an extremely racist neurotic weirdo, whose most powerful stories are inescapably rooted in his xenophobia and visceral fear of corruption from within. But he's been dead for close to a century, and all of his works are in public domain. So, if you want to read the HPL originals, you can do so with clear conscience, and if you don't, there are plenty of modern authors who are playing with the concepts and tropes he used in a non-bigoted ways, or actively deconstructing and engaging with the early-20th century bigotry that was prevalent in the works of HPL and so many other weird fiction writers.

For another example: JK Rowling is the well-known author of the massively successful and popular Harry Potter books, which have spawned movies, games, toys and various spin-offs. She is also a loathsome transphobe, who is actively using her massive wealth and connections to push for harmful policies and politics in the UK and worldwide. If you spend any money on any HP products - books, games, movies etc. - a portion of that is funneled to JKR, who will be using it to hurt trans people. Everyone must, of course, do their own ethical calculus, but I do think that nobody who cares about trans rights should watch the coming HP series, or buy any related merchandise. Where you draw the line on fanart and fanmade stuff is a trickier decision, but it has to be remembered that JKR has in the past said that she sees people supporting Harry Potter as supporting her.

To summarize: this stuff is complicated and nothing is pure unproblematic good or pure bad, but there are still degrees of good and bad, the context matters an awful lot, and everyone should have lines they won't cross.

my friends, it is not illegal to recognize there are problematic elements to the content you enjoy. it’s called critical thinking. you can enjoy something and not turn a blind eye to the shit wrong with it. 

[certifiedsexed]

is it weird to be into something in theory, but not really in practice, even if it’s something that’s technically possible? like, i like the idea of exhibitionism, but even though that idea is arousing for me, i get drawn out of the ‘escape of sexual stuff’ pretty quick when i think about how things like that can go wrong, like i’m already a bit paranoid about being recorded without my consent in general, you know?

If that's weird, it's all weird, Anon. That's actually fairly common, though.

Some people have tons of kinks they only like in theory but not in practice. It's playing pretend! It's okay to just think about certain types of play without actually physically engaging in them. [Especially since some people have kinks that are currently literally impossible. Like mermaid sex!]

It makes sense that anxiety like that could interfere with enjoying a kink like that. I think it'd probably really help if you counter those sorts of thoughts down with the fact you are not planning on doing it in real life, you are just playing pretend in your mind. Tell your brain to shut the fuck up.

Treat it as if you're writing a story, or planning a play. It doesn't have to be realistic or play into your anxiety, it's just a fantasy! It's just you, playing with your imagination.

Hope this helps, Anon! Let me know if you have any other questions. <3

[sleepymccoy]

Okay so something happened in the trekdom (is that a term anyone has ever used)

I think spirk got canonised?? Or something?? And I assume that as my certified Trekkie Mutual you feel some kinda way about this. you’re a Spones shipper but still how we doing?

I'm sure someone's used trekdom! It makes sense as a word regardless

I appreciate the Trekkie certification lol

Yeah dude, look. Most of the fandom is big into spirk so like people enjoying that romance is par for the course! I got nothing against spirk, it's just a bit of a boring dynamic so I don't really spend time on it. Too healthy for my tastes. Spones is way more juicy, it's got the tension and the sort of different world views that you see in good omens, so it's fun!

To be clear tho, spirk is as canon as it's ever been. Strong subtext, but in the way that a homophobe could watch it and say well they're just good friends. Nothing has changed in that sense, it's just another bit of footage doing more of the same. It's less gay than a lot of the original series, but it's new and shiny so on a surface level i get the excitement

Shatner, who plays Kirk, has done this as a non canon short film. It's apparently considered as canon as the novels? Which is like, not much. Most people don't engage. I haven't really looked into that, im not gonna watch it cos it kind of pisses me off

The thing that really fucks my goat about it is that the guy who plays Spock died a while ago, and didn't get along with the guy who plays Kirk. But the guy who plays Kirk has funded and produced and managed this whole thing to be about his character and his importance, regardless of the wishes of the original Spock actor. Including literally doing someone up in prosthetics to look more like Nimoy. Not just Spock generally, but specifically Nimoy's Spock. Nimoy was involved in star trek films in his late life, and he didn't choose to do this when he was alive. Only after his death has Shatner forced this to happen

That's what's leaving a really bad taste in my mouth. And I feel like people are either not accepting Nimoy's death and are happy to see him puppeted by someone he disliked, which makes me pity them. I work in aged care so I know I'm more comfortable with death than the average, but like. This is a bit fucking dark, no? It's maudlin, let him rest in peace for fucks sake.

That, or they don't mind the manipulation of his image if it tickles their ship, which makes me dislike them. And I don't think I'll really get over that any time soon, it's so disrespectful. And those are both negative feelings, so I'm kind of generally not pleased about my dash rn

I'm trying to take an angle of being about McCoy cos he doesn't feature in the short and that feels wrong. Spock-centric stuff is feeling a little tainted right now, but I'm sure that'll pass. Fanart is different to this kind of image stealing, but it's still weird for me rn. And as much as I love Kirk, I can't remove him from Shatner and his megalomania right now. I hope that'll pass, but I don't think Shatner's gonna stop here so. Hm.

Besides I like McCoy and he's not complicated by all this so I'm just continuing to play in my little sandbox

It's a weird time for trekdom. There's a bit of a rift, and not down shipping lines. I'm seeing a lot of posts working through their complicated feeling around the disrespect inherent in stealing Nimoy's face for Shatner. And I'm seeing other people celebrate the disrespect cos their ship held hands and that makes it worth it.

I'm hoping people overwhelmingly calm down a bit in a week, get a bit embarassed about how pleased they were over something so gross, and it just sort of goes away. Then we can all go back to having a go at Shatner for his constant sexism and homophobia

At least it's not fucking AI tho!

[sophieinwonderland]

It is actually so weird to read the updates to the Sophie is Dangerous doc and see the hypocrisy in the language they use.

They will, in one breath, call for the "deplatforming" of a list of pro-endo blogs that they disagree with.

Then in the next breath, whine about how the pro endo community "blacklisted" them for their actions.

To now be blacklisted from the entire pro-endo community because we documented and called out @/sophieinwonderland’s abusive behavior, we well as corrected @/noxsyncourse when he insisted that anti-endos are a “hate group” is fucking insane to us. ... With that being said, this document is now being expanded to include the original documentation of @/sophieinwonderland’s abhorrent behavior, as well as the domino effect that followed which resulted in us being essentially blacklisted from the pro-endo community ... We personally believe Sophie needs to be deplatformed within the pro-endo community. ... we believe it’s up to the plural community, anti- and pro-endo alike, to deplatform her. This means block/unfollow. This means no longer engaging with her posts. This means no screenshotting her posts and talking about them on your blogs where she’s blocked or private Discord servers. Sophie is never going to recognize that her actions are out of line. So, the less the plural community engages with her, the less exposure the community has to her, the less reach her damage has.

The irony being that the author was the one who actually created a list of people that they told their followers to block. The pro-endos just independently decided to unfollow the author and not interact with them anymore.

I don't believe that anybody ever put the author's name on a list or told anyone else to block them. People just chose to. Completely independently. Because they didn't like the author's behavior.

I just... Can't understand how some people can possess such a complete lack of self-awareness.

[creatingblackcharacters]

Some of my thoughts for your conversation about inaction towards antiBlack/racist behavior in shared online spaces (particularly fandom).

1. "I dont see it / I dont go here" - this was my first thought/defensive reaction and in reading others responses I think its a shared one.

Tumblr is perhaps unique in how purposely you can shape your experience and limit what you interact with. Blocking someone just cause is fully acceptable and expected here.

So, when Ive seen depictions of 'Black' characters that made me go, "Mmm idk man" its been my policy to just block and move on. Less chance of seeing a racist in the tags I like in the future *shrug*

Now on other sites perhaps there is some consideration that could be given to not wanting to boost something racist via interaction...but that's not how Tumblr works. Furthermore your reminder that seeing things go unopposed is the problem hit me like a frying pan to the face. Because...yeah duh.

We know the 'social rules' of this platform, you report/block the porn bots, you dont spam tags for engagement (or report if you see it), add image descriptions, reblog things you like etc. Would it be so hard to leave a simple comment on the things you want to see be changed?

2. "What if I do it wrong/I dont know this fandom/Not my place to speak?" - I firmly believe the main reasons people dont meaningfully engage with posts here or on other platforms is two fold: Responses and Outting.

If you were to post a mild comment saying for example, "Hey, feels kinda weird how you're only talking about this Black character being violent in this show. Why dont you check out this blog post by CBC, a Black artist who really digs into this topic more?"

Now you are expected to 1. 'deal' with whatever that persons response is and 2. Anyone an see and respond to what you said.

I think we generally expect random stranger interactions on the Internet to be unpleasant but, like if we are putting the focus on caring about Black people in out spaces...shits already 'unpleasant' for them.

Its time to start firing fireworks off in our neighborhoods to keep the rents low so to speak. You, non-Black folk (i.e me), dont have to wage endless comment battles with someone who wont listen. Just stating what you are seeing is enough, its marking that post for other people coming along. Forcing the question, "Y'all are we cool with this?"

As for messing up/having a record of things you said someone else might take issue with later on. Yeah but thats already happening whenever you reblog anything.

If you actually spoke out of turn just say, "Im sorry thanks for letting me know" and move on with your life. Otherwise folks on here will actually harass you over your shipping preferences so your rolling those dice already. Why not do it for something better worth it?

3. A Note - Genuinely thank you for posing these thoughtful question and just honestly expressing your frustration/hurt. It helped me think more deeply about some old habits.

Thank you!

Hm. And you're welcome

[bayeprose]

‿︵ ‧˚⭒ excerpt from please stay, hippocrene on ao3

(warning: contains suggestive text + mentions of kissing) ‧˚⭒

Frank eventually sputtered, “I’m... I’m just gonna try to explain what happened, and you can just tell me to shut up when it’s TMI, okay?” “Okay.” Percy said. He lowered his voice even more. Shadows from the gray sky made it seem like he was about to tell a ghost story. “Last night, things with Hazel got kind of... weird...” “Weird?” “Yeah... weird.” “How weird?” “We... we were kissing.” “Oh.” Percy blinked. That’s not where he thought this was going. “Okay. Uh... do you guys not usually do that, or—” “No, no, we’ve kissed before. But this time, we really kissed. A lot. Like, we were making out. And it was great.” Out of respect, Percy tried not to visibly grimace. No offense to either of them, but Hazel was like a little sister to him, and it felt really strange to hear Frank talk of her like that. It just wasn't something that he wished to visualize. “Okay,” he said calmly. Really. He was trying his best to be calm. “And?” “Well...” Frank twiddled his thumbs. “We’ve never done that before. And it got really intense, and I... I kind of reacted to it too much.” Now, here was some telling information, finally. Percy felt like he was starting to understand what his friend was getting at. But... their first time making out? Last night? Really? Percy’s free time was quite limited, and he spent approximately zero seconds of his days thinking about what other people in his circle did behind closed doors. He’s a--‘That’s none of my business.’--type of guy, to the extent that Annabeth was often irritated by his lack of interest in demigod drama. She’d come to him with fresh, riveting gossip like, “Did you hear? Sherman and Miranda got caught in the Big House together.” and he’d have little more to say than, “I forgot they were dating.”

Like... sure, he figured that the couples he knew of were sleeping together. He could even surmise that the singles he knew of might be sleeping together. But... so what? They’re adults, now; it’s not really all that scandalous or interesting, and in fact, people not sleeping together seemed a lot more noteworthy than the alternative. So to hear that Frank and Hazel had never even made out before... not only was it noteworthy, considering how long they’ve been together, but it was so surprising that he needed to know more in spite of his discomfort with the sordid subject matter. Is this why people like gossip? “... Wait,” Percy started nervously. “What do you mean you ‘reacted too much’?” Frank blushed, which made Percy even more nervous. “Um... Hazel was, well, we were on the couch, and we just finished a movie, and we were just really close, and I kind of— “Oh gods, Frank, you didn’t... do that, did you?”

Summary: In Frank's eyes, Percy and Annabeth are the perfect demigod couple. They're grown, they're engaged, and they've overcome so much together. Feeling helpless in escalating his own relationship to their coveted adult achievements, he seeks out Percy's help. Unbeknownst to Frank, Percy and Annabeth are grappling with some intimacy struggles of their own.

read on ao3 ⭒ 25k/ongoing ⭒ explicit content/18+ only ⭒ percabeth/frazel

[a-dragons-journal]

hey, i know you’re na’vi link so i wanted to ask something. i’m questioning na’vi kin right now but can’t talk about it on my main blog because one of my friends follows me. they know about my alterhumanity and i post about it on that blog. however, i am white. very white. i’ve seen some people say that na’vi kin is cultural appropriation? i’m worried my alterhuman friends will try to accuse me of cultural appropriation if i confirm this kintype. any advice?

Okay, well, first off, I'm also white, so let's get that out of the way. However I have had this conversation with and have heard the opinions of Native American people with both opinions, so I can pass on my conclusions from that conversation, and if other people have opinions they want to add I welcome them to, especially Indigenous folks of course.

Thing number one: if it's not a choice, it can't be morally wrong. End of. You can't apply morality to things that aren't choices. You can engage with it in moral vs immoral ways, but simply having an identity that you didn't choose cannot be immoral.

Now obviously that doesn't apply to me, and it may or may not apply to you, so here's the rest of it:

Someone who's Na'vikin/link isn't claiming to be Indigenous here and now. We're not claiming to have direct experience with those struggles or the same amount of voice as Indigenous people do with regards to them. Na'vi are similar to and based on Indigenous people, but they aren't actually Indigenous people.

The Na'vi aren't based on any one Indigenous culture - although the Metkayina are much more heavily based on the Maori than anything else, the other clans we've seen aren't as specific, and are intentionally a mish-mash of dozens of Indigenous cultures. So... who is allowed to be Na'vikin/link, exactly? If the answer is "only people from the culture they're based on," then the real answer is no one. And about that:

This is really just a variant on the old "is kinning outside your race problematic" argument, and we came to a community-agreed-upon conclusion on that years ago: no. For a lot of reasons, including the above, and also the fact that if you're saying it's okay to identify as a wolf but not as a character of a different ethnicity than you... does that not imply that it's easier for a white person to connect that deeply with an animal than with a person of color? Is that not pretty damn problematic itself?

As a bonus round, if your answer then becomes "well, I guess you can be Na'vikin/link, but you shouldn't talk about it/engage with it in public": we know that suppressing kintypes is bad for you. We have learned this the hard way - how many stories are out there about how incredibly unhealthy that is for most people? You're now advocating for a known harm in order to avoid a hypothetical one. I don't think that's fair to anyone.

For what it's worth, I do think there are probably ways to engage with being a Na'vi that are appropriative, racist, and weird toward Indigenous people - just like there are plenty of ways to be a fan of the Na'vi that are appropriative, racist, and weird toward Indigenous people. But I don't think being a Na'vi is inherently that way. I don't think it's that hard to be Na'vi and be respectful of real-world Indigenous cultures that the Na'vi have parallels to. As long as you're not claiming to be Indigenous here and now, or have some ~special connection~ to Indigenous cultures because of your Na'vi 'type, or appropriating Indigenous things because they have Na'vi vibes, then I think you're fine.

But, as I said, I'm more than willing to hear other opinions if people have them! Please, add on in the notes. (I also feel like I'm forgetting a major point in my argument as to why it's fine for some reason, but can't get my hands around it, so hopefully I'm wrong and if not you might see an update to this post in the future when I remember. I've got a bit of a headache right now, so I'm a little bleary.)

[better-than-sleeping]

A part of Richard's isolation from the group that I would like to put forward is this:

I truly do believe the group care for Richard as a friend, even when their relationships start to spiral out of control near the end. But that care isn't always present throughout their lives, the same way most people aren't constantly obsessing over their friend's feelings 24/7, and he cannot understand it.

It's not just the stuff you would typically think of that proves this to me, like the twins going out of their way to include him, companionable rambles with Bunny, making food with Francis. The most obvious instance of this is Richard being excluded from the Bacchanalia, and yes, this obviously sucks as someone trying so desperately to be included and a part of the group, but also makes so much sense from their perspective.

If Richard had been normal, he would have been so weirded out! This could be a convenient excuse, but it could just as easily be the group showing their own desires to be accepted by HIM, in a kind of reverse of roles that Richard naturally doesn't want to pick up on, because that would be seeing them human, and fallible, and SIMILAR TO HIMSELF. Unthinkable!

Something I've not seen discussed is the little aside when he first falls in with the group proper and relates that they had found him just as aloof as he had found them. Their inviting him to Francis's house was simply an urge to impress him, and I can't see any other way of reading it than that. If they had simply wanted to include him, but didn't care about how he saw them, they could have simply kept inviting him to their houses and out for lunch.

But, it's the moments that also double as little instances of ostracism that really interest me: Camilla saying Henry didn't want to do another pig ritual because he thought it would upset Richard, the group telling him they've already involved him enough and that he shouldn't participate in Bunny's murder. The general reading of this (that I've seen so far) seems to be that Henry did these things purposefully to keep Richard apart from the group, he didn't know him as well as the others, an unknown quantity, someone he didn't care for as much since he hadn't known him as long. But there's a lot of ambiguity there as well, and I think what makes things so compelling is that uncertainty. It could be purposeful, or unintentional, or some inextricable combination of the two.

(As an aside- ironically, I believe Henry may care about Richard the most out of anyone in the group. Helping him while he was sick, worried about seeing Richard drunk during the day, it's all rather sweet, and I don't believe it was entirely some machievellian scheme.)

However, I like to see the isolation as mostly, if not entirely unintentional, because that makes it so much more cutting to me. It's subtle. They don't put any special thought into doing it, they just…don't even think how these things could make him feel.

The worst part is, as far as I remember, Richard never fully engages with his feelings about this, but they are felt so much through the story and his actions within them. They are moments that sunk deep within his psyche like a stone that's dropped into water and swallowed immediately without a trace. It sits very still inside him, unmoveable.

His acceptance of these moments as they are happening to him is likely a result of his history of loneliness and being apart from others. There is nothing unusual to him about this, that it would require further thought from him within his narrative.

A large part of Richard's isolation is due to his glorification of the people he deems worthy, which continues even after he begins to see their flaws. Despite them, he still can't bear to see them torn down to his level, people he can relate to instead of glorify or look down upon. I think there is an element of self destruction to this, not wanting to understand so he has an excuse to punish himself for self perceived deficiencies.

It's very intriguing, this uncertainty of how much of Richard's isolation from the group is imagined, or perhaps even self imposed in a kind of feedback loop, where he feels pushed away and so pulls himself away from them, to anonymous parties with people he professes not to care about, takes pills and sleeps for days, to numb himself from the pain of their rejection.

And in the process, this feeling of isolation is enforced, becomes more a reality through the concrete evidence he has produced by himself. Maybe the group see his behaviour and think he needs space, they give it to him. He feels lonely, he says nothing. Because he would rather freeze to death than ask for help.

[plethomacademia]

Ok, I'm explaining my cryptic shit after the jump. CW fertility stuff and also it's long, sorry.

Up front, please read through before commenting as I have a request for how people engage with this.

I was supposed to start birth control as the first step of the IVF egg retrieval process two weeks ago today, because that's when my period was supposed to start. My periods have a habit of disappearing in the fall/winter, a weird pattern that no one has been able to explain but one that started back in 2022.

When my period didn't show up, I was pretty upset, because it doesn't come a week late when this happens, it comes a month late at best, sometimes even two or three months. My IVF clinic knows this, so I was not happy that they made me wait a full week to come in to have tests run to see why it was not showing up. Last Friday, I finally got to go in for some bloodwork and an ultrasound. They called me that day at noon to let me know that my period was late because I was pregnant.

We were told we could keep trying while we were getting our tests ran for IVF and it worked. I had tested myself, but the home tests I used came back negative and I didn't test more than once because honestly, I was over peeing on sticks. I have peed on a lot of sticks this year.

This week, we had a lot of blood draws to confirm my hormones were increasing appropriately. They are low, but the slope looks good. Today, we had an ultrasound and saw the gestational sac in the uterus with good placement.

Anyway, that's my whirlwind! I am only mentioning this because I can't really talk about it openly outside of a few close friends and I am really scared! I have no reason to think I will be any luckier with this baby than I was with the last one, since we are rolling the dice with my older eggs again. I need a place to vent that anxiety and fear, so I am going to do that here.

My request: I am ok with congratulations, but please just layer them with caution. In the loss communities I am in, we talk a lot about hoping for the best and preparing for the worst. I really appreciate when people say "cautious congrats" or "hoping for the best" or things like that. When people tell me not to worry or that it's going to be fine, I do not respond well because, respectfully, you don't fucking know. I don't fucking know. All I can do is take this one scan at a time.

If you don't want to hear about this, please block the tag, that's why I am using it.

[moeblob]

"What's cookin', good lookin'?"

AKA I love how unhinged both Alfred and Bunet are and I want to study their brains.

[forestgreenlesbian]

.

[dykedvonte]

My post about Anya is making like a little ruckus on Twitter and I think it’s crazy how many people like have a problem with it.

Like you don’t have to agree with how I characterize Anya and her actions but it’s more like, why are you focused on only one aspect of her character? Why are you removing nuance from the situation? I don’t see it as giving Curly the benefit of the doubt when it comes to doing better for Anya, but as exploring his character and hers relationship with a the very little authentic facts we get about them. In truth, there’s a lot more I wish Curly did, even if it wasn’t pragmatic but I realize the issue there.

The first psychological horror game in a while that’s real intricate in its storytelling and makes you need to really need to address the morality of intentions and its already getting torn asunder smh 😔

[bogunicorn]

apparently my hottest fandom take is that i think it's Certified Loser Shit to go on tumblr and act like you're being discriminated against because of the race or whatever of your fantasy OC in a video game

the devs of (insert game here) don't "hate you" and take things away from "your people" because you can't be remotely normal about playing a catgirl or a dwarf or an elf or something

[daughterofsarenrae]

eek

[uncanny-tranny]

Do you believe in transandrophobia

I mean, I talk at length about being a trans man and the intersections of my trans manhood and interacting in a world which often doesn't want people like me to exist, so even if I don't really call my experiences that, maybe you might? I generally support people calling their experiences with oppression how they see it, which is why some trans men say they experience misogyny and some don't. Neither are "more correct" because we almost all experience transphobia, misogyny, and everything else slightly differently.

At the end of the day, trans liberation must happen with all of us no matter what their experience is. I've seen so much "discourse" surrounding terms like these when at the end of the day, we're still being oppressed no matter what we call our experiences. I think it's okay for people to label their experiences as they see fit, but I don't think that's the end-all-be-all. I guess my sole focal point is trans liberation before debating about what terms we have to use.

I always find asks like this to be very odd, mostly because I don't know what the context behind this is or why it's asked. If you want a more direct answer to my political or philosophical views, I really would at least like more details as to what inspired questions like these so I can clarify, expand, or discuss specific points.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...