#and i might lose them both
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I know this is old hat to just about everyone, but I'm more and more enjoying Imogen and Laudna as not just a mirror of the Briarwoods but also, and perhaps even more so, as a foil.
Laudna may be the death magic goth with a necromancer in her head, but out of the two of them, Imogen is the stronger mirror of Delilah. She’s the one with the undead lover, the one prepared to break the world by risking Delilah's return as long as it got her Laudna back, the one with the drive and the thirst for power and knowledge. Laudna meanwhile, while also tempted by power, is mostly just along for the ride, deeply devoted to Imogen over anything or anyone, alive only because Imogen found a way to resurrect her. They have looked each other in the eye, recognised the same seeds of darkness and the possibility of giving in, and said 'Together either way'.
But they are also in many ways a direct subversion of the Briarwoods. Delilah and Sylas both seemed perfectly happy to have made a pact with Vecna and revelled in the power he granted them, even knowing the disaster he would bring and the horrific acts he asked of them. Imogen and Laudna meanwhile, while tempted by power and openly voicing said temptation to each other, actively fight against it. Imogen was prepared to risk Delilah's return for the sake of Laudna's resurrection, but she would've fought her every step of the way. She's tempted by the power and knowledge of Ruidus, but also prepared to give all of it up if it means saving the world, because unlike Delilah she chooses to care about people other than herself and her lover. Laudna may be prepared to follow Imogen into hell itself, but she may also be what would lead her back out, because unlike Sylas she doesn’t just recognise darkness in her lover, she wants to fight it alongside her.
This is what I mean when I say these two hold the potential for great darkness. They wouldn’t function as a mirror and a foil of the most romantically iconic critical role villain duo if they didn't. But holding the potential for darkness and corruption also means holding the potential to resist and fight said darkness at every turn. It gives them the potential to choose kindness and struggle while still keeping a little bit of that darkness in their hearts, because without it, they never would have found each other.
#critical role#imogen temult#laudna#cr3 spoilers#imodna#southern gothic#cr3#i still get weirded out by the way large swaths of shippers will happily compare imodna to the briarwoods because#'ooh romance and aesthetic and breaking the world for each other ~~'#and yet will completely lose their shit when someone actually engages with the darker aspects of their characters#and talks about their relationship as anything other than perfect and fluffy and supportive#guys. the potential darkness is what makes them interesting. it's where the flavor comes from. embrace it#I'm hoping for more moments where they give in a little to that dark the way laudna did when killing bor'dor#i mean laura even said last 4sd that imogen very well might next time because she Wants To Know!!#please go there miss bailey I'm begging it would be such an interesting turn for both imogen and laudna!#delilah briarwood#sylas briarwood#nella talks cr
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. �� (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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its so funny that all minute—the guy who once upon a time hoped to redeem zam—'s team has accomplished is getting him to consider giving up his remaining honor in order to match the level they're playing on ?
#m#lifesteal#i can't stop thinking about minute&co dismissing the argument about how they've encouraged players#to ban themselves and thus contradicted their own stated goal#the way 'peaceful ending' warped into 'it doesn't matter what we do so long as we can flip a switch at the end' but what the fuck happens#in a scenario where you unban everyone who you've pissed off ? are they happy? is that peace? and you won't even defend the choice!#what the fuck is happening here!#you laugh at zam for saying he's won but you won't have the argument that you know you'd lose ^_^#none of this is angry in tone i'm having fun. thisis my bread and butter. i'm happy lifesteal is weird and tense again#enjoying that it's looped this far around into the ACTIVE dismissal of rp-logic where zam&co are having to say 'okay then#we'll win This game too!'#them acting dismayed that mapicc wouldn't walk into that obsidian box. like oh my god#and it's so different from the weird tenseness of s4 it's something different entirely. new meta conflicts just for me !????#we'll see how it all ends.... they might make me mad again but we'll cross that bridge#it's so different from the Vitalasy Incident even though both involve people functioning in opposition to lifesteal's 'storytelling rules'#for vi it was because of his emotional investment. it manifested in nothing but endless 'character-level' debate in the lead up and#plenty of emotional roleplay from vitalasy in the aftermath#vi's primary effect on season 4 through the wormhole was to render lifesteal's gameplay obsolete#pb&j's primary effect is instead to focus intently on Winning that game while everything else falls by the wayside
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o wait before i start posting any pics.. i was thinking that maybe.. you guys could help me liquify this gender some more by switching up what you call me.... DON'T GET ME WRONG I LOVE . LOVE LOVE LOVE WHEN YOU USE HE/HIM AND JUST OVERALL LIKE MORE MASC STUFF THAT'S SOOO MMMMMMMMMSO FUCKING GOOD like i don't get to feel that irl at all so it really does make me so happy but i've just been thinking abt TRYING to switch it up more yk? does this even make sense...... . hhhh anyway i might won't even like it and i'll want to just go back to hehim but i wanna try... JUST TO SWITCH IT UP.
#i think the only term that is incredibly questionable is “queen” lmao#idk i have some personal beef with that one#MAN I REALLY MIGHT JUST DELETE THIS IN LIKE FIVE MINUTES#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#WHY DON'T I KNOW WHAT I WANT#i'm not asking you to fully drop the he him but just maybe.. use she her every once in a while..#I'M GONNA EXPLODE WHY IS THIS THE WEIRDEST POST EVER TO MAKE WHAT IS GENDER CAN SOMEBODY TELL ME#btw if anybody happens to be wondering why i don't just use they/them#iii just don't feel anything towards those#personally#like they don't make me feel like anything while he him and she her are more like yes:3333#does.. does that even make sense#oh my god#there are question marks flying around my head#i read this fic the other day#which is in my drafts i need to add tags to it#but the op just.. like made my brain grow two sizes#bc they made the reader genderfluid and then proceeded to use both “girlfriend” and “boyfriend” throughout the fic and i just#HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#how do i .. get that#asghdhsaghdasghdshagdhgas#GUYS LOOK I'M GONNA SPIRAL I'M JUST GONNA HIT POST#ENOUGH#mayor of loserville#mickey vs gender#10 - 17#I'M LOSING AGAIN OHHH FUCK OFF
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the good news: the elf update will allow me to give Ethedis freckles and I've fallen in love with the idea
the bad news: they're going to massacre her hair 😭
(oh well, at least I can still draw her cute)
#lotro#lotro oc#Ethedis#*hoping and praying* this is only the first draft there's still time for them to fix her hair there's still time they might fix it there's-#RIP i guess I'll need to find her some nice hoods and hats#trying to play a little more lose with the lineart here both so I can draw faster and hopefully things will look less stiff#idk how this is working out tho
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the smudge on an otherwise perfect painting, and tears of moss
tags for more context
#itafushi#fushiita#meguyuji#meguyuuji#MEGUYUUJI YEHAHAAAAAA i’m sorry that ship name is the best one for them nothing compares#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen#megumi fushiguro#itadori yuuji#fushiguro megumi#yuuji itadori#yuji itadori#itadori yuji#i’m realizing i never say yuji oops sorry guys yuuji looks nicer#i drew the megumi one for my friends birthday !!!!! happy birthday to her i love her she’s a real one#so ermmm there is meaning behind this bc i love them a lot#these are both megumi pov/feelings#both are different angles of the same grief/loss of losing yuuji#this can be taken as him losing yuuji in season 1 or post shibuya pre culling game#both of these are supposed to be “perfect” but ruined by something#for yuuji it’s sukuna (or what i like to call sukuna scars)#for megumi it’s emotions/tears and the fact he does not want to address them much#so i tried to go for a moss look on his? that his tears look like they’re eating away at the canvas#might be off abt how i drew it#errrr whatever I LOVE ITAFUSHI YEARNING#fushiguro x itadori#itadori x fushiguro#itafushi fanart#fushiita fanart
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Belobog was my fave main quest but a lot of it is so. Contradictory. It's like they had multiple groups doing different shit and none of them checked in with each other for consistency. And you see this so much in Gepard's profile.
So in the main quest, they made him unfailingly, unquestionably loyal to Cocolia. Gepard's character arc is him learning to question authority etc etc. And this isn't even a bad thing; that's a story worth telling! It makes good conflict between him and Serval! And I love that we got Gepard as a boss battle and I get to see him all the time in SU!
But then you look at his character stories and it's like. The complete opposite.
According to his profile, Gepard has already HAD this awakening, long before the Astral Express, and he'd already decided Cocolia sucks. Even outside of his stories, there's a pretty damning readable between him and Pela.
He even disobeyed direct orders right in front of her- he has been disobeying orders for a while now!
So I've decided I'm marrying the two different sides of this into a 1.5k fic-ish thingy, because I think there's some fun potential there with Gepard not trusting Cocolia, but still having to pretend to be a good obedient little soldier.
Anyway. I love to think of it as like. Gepard knows Cocolia has sunk into her apathy. He can see it in her eyes every time he looks at her. She doesn't care. Not about him, not about Pela, not about all his soldiers on the frontlines giving their lives to protect the citizens. And that's... It makes him bristle a bit, but ok. Gepard can deal with this. Even if Cocolia no longer cares, as long as she does her job then it's fine. Having compassion behind an action doesn't matter as much as the action itself. If Cocolia's heart is no longer swayed, then he'll just have to care twice as hard to pick up the slack. He considers it part of his duty as a captain of the guard anyway. It's fine. Gepard can deal with it.
And then, Cocolia starts coming down to the restricted zone. Issuing direct orders.
And Gepard realizes he is in way over his head.
Because Cocolia orders him to stay back and issue commands from the ramparts, away from all his comrades, away from where he can protect them.
Gepard had thought nothing could be as bad as watching a fellow guard die right next to him. But the first time he watches someone struck by a killing blow, so far away, it hurts. Every defensive scar across his arms itches, his fingers curl in want of a weapon, the cold cannot numb his hands enough as they desperately ache for his shield. It hurts.
Gepard tries to find any reason to stay. Because surely... He knows Cocolia has lost her love for her people, but surely... She wouldn't...
One day, Cocolia orders for their gunners to advance 20 yards. There are no survivors. She almost looks like she smiles.
Gepard doesn't sleep that night.
Pela brings him the report at the end of the first month; and then the month after that, and the month after that. A significant uptick in losses, and all of it started on that first day Cocolia started overriding his authority and issuing her own orders. The ends of Gepard's pens have all been nearly chewed off. Pela outright calls Cocolia an idiot, and Gepard corrects her. Cocolia isn't an idiot. Gepard had known her through Serval, knew her through all her college years and then some, and he knows how intelligent she is. It's not that she's stupid, and it's not that she's inexperienced, it's nothing of the sort.
Cocolia knows exactly what she's doing.
She must, there's no way she could make such a horrible mess of things so badly by accident. And Pela, quick as a whip, sharp as a tack, always too smart for her own good, catches onto the meaning behind Gepard's correction without any further prompting. The tent goes deathly quiet, nothing but the wind howling outside.
"...She's trying to kill us," Pela whispers, her voice swiftly suffocated by the silence.
Gepard swallows. He can't bring himself to correct her this time. There is nothing he could say that he would actually mean.
His gaze drops, back down to his desk and the reports on it. The names aren't listed, just the numbers, but Gepard knows them, knew them, and there must be something wrong, something he's missing, because why, why would she-? What could this possibly accomplish-?
“Gepard! Focus!” Something snaps right under his nose, and Gepard startles, eyes instantly honing in on Pela's irritated face as she leans over his desk. She holds his gaze for a moment before she huffs and begins to pace, wedges a knuckle between her teeth and bites like Gepard hasn't seen her do since cadet school.
Pela angrily strides from one end of his tent to the other, words hissed between her grit teeth. “What are we going to do?” In the dim lighting, Gepard can just barely see the damp spot of blood weeping under her gloves. “We need a plan.”
“A plan?”
“Wh- Yes, a plan! Unless you want more people to die!” Pela rounds on him then, all the wrath of a blizzard, winds roaring and snow sharp enough to cut.
“We don't even know-”
“What does it matter?! She killed-!!” Pela cuts off with a garbled noise when Gepard leaps up from his desk, hastily shoves his hand over her mouth. The prosthetic, not the flesh one, because he knows better than to assume Pela won't seize the opportunity to leave teeth marks in his skin.
“You're right. I'm sorry, I'm sorry; you're right. But you need to keep quiet.” Pela quirks an eyebrow at him and Gepard can read the question in her face. “Because we both saw what she did to Serval,” he hisses.
It's amazing the snow plains haven't thawed out yet, the amount of heat Pela can put behind a glare. The mere mention of Serval, and the smoking ruins Cocolia had made of her life and career, have her bristling up like a riled cat. The sudden hot breath she takes fans fog across his metal skin, and Gepard wisely keeps it in place until Pela finally sighs and reaches up, taps her fingertips against the back of his hand.
The second she's free, Pela bats him away and then her knuckle is right back between her teeth again, Gepard leaning back against his desk with his arms crossed to watch her resume her pacing. “If we spread the word, she'll have us discharged and make sure we can't even touch the frontlines,” Pela's voice seethes like an open sore. Gepard nods but keeps his silence. He knows better than to get in her way.
“And if you and I are both out of the picture, Belobog is fucked.” A little harsher than how he would have put it, but there's no denying that they're both important to the city's survival. Pela has the restricted zone running as efficiently as ever, and Gepard had become the youngest captain on record for a reason. “We need to keep this tight under wraps, at least for now… It can't leak to anyone higher up the chain.” Another nod. “Serval might know other discontents…” Another n-
Gepard's head snaps up. “No.”
“No what?”
“No. We're not involving Serval in this.”
Somehow, even the same tone that leaves entire squadrons shaking in their boots has never worked on her. “You're not deciding that for her, Gepard.”
Pela hadn't seen the worst of it, though, back when his sister had just been banned from the Architects. Serval's pride hadn't allowed it. Pela wasn't the one to find her passed out bottle still in hand, hadn't been the one to wash the sick out of her hair or carry her to bed.
Serval still has trouble thinking clearly when it comes to Cocolia, still can't quite bring herself to be objective. And Gepard maybe doesn't want her to be purely objective- but he would worry a lot less if she thought twice before she acted more often.
“At least let me be the one to bring it up to her.”
“Whatever, fine,” Pela gestures affirmatively at him as she paces past, and Gepard sighs. Good, at least that's one thing he can help.
From there, it's a lot of hemming and hawing and frustration. Cocolia has them under her boot, and Gepard and Pela both know it. Even with the way she's been cracking down on freedoms lately, Cocolia is still, overall, liked by the people. It's unlikely anyone would believe them. They don't even have solid proof, because most people don't know Cocolia as well as they do and won't see the clues in the same light.
The Fragmentum has been ramping up in recent years, too. Everyone is struggling just to survive as is, they can't afford a fight on two fronts. Gepard is a damn good captain, one of the best for that matter. But they're at a massive disadvantage, his experience is narrowed to fighting a defensive battle against monsters, that's all he's ever done. That's all anyone there has ever done. He has no way of finding first-hand knowledge for taking the offensive against a human opponent, and if he goes at this blind, there's no way he'll get everyone out unscathed. He's going to lose people. He's going to lose a lot of people.
He'd never thought before that Cocolia would have it in her to have someone killed. And with this new knowledge, he has no guarantee she won't go after Serval or Lynx if she decides to retaliate.
Gepard has to remind himself to breathe when he realizes this.
Pela writes down every name the two of them can come up with. Lists and lists of names and groups and anyone they can think of who might be an ally in all of this. They memorize every bit of it, make their plans of who to talk to and when. Gepard watches the sparks reflect off Pela's glasses as they burn the evidence together.
Pela finally leaves, far too late to make it home, but says she wants to stay in the restricted zone anyway to investigate. Gepard watches her make her way in the direction of Dunn's tent, watches her back until she's out of his sight and squashes down the urge to follow and keep an eye on her. His tent feels empty.
In the morning, Gepard is up before the wake up bells. He drags himself out of bed, leads his soldiers through their morning training. The same people gravitate to each other everyday. Friend groups and training partners. There's an ongoing rivalry between a few squadrons that everyone bets on. Some of them have lockets around their necks, keepsakes, mementos. Some of them wear wedding rings.
Gepard is suddenly, painfully aware of something acidic clawing at the inside of his throat, of a heavy weight low in his chest that blooms, takes up room until it threatens to spread his ribs. His mouth tastes of bile and blood.
He rearranges the schedules. Puts himself down for every open patrol into the Fragmentum, makes sure he'll be on the frontlines every single time Cocolia visits.
He only hopes that it's enough.
#honkai star rail#gepard landau#hsr gepard#pelageya sergeyevna#hsr pela#hsr#smacking Gepard out of Hoyo's hands and running off with him skzjmdkd#tentatively Figuring Out how to write these two... It feels a little tricky starting out with extreme circumstances like this haha#I feel like a lot of people see Gepard as naive for trusting Cocolia so much but I don't think that's quite it. He's not stupid.#He's not even naive.#He's someone who has been groomed since birth by his own parents to be an obedient Guard and nothing outside of that role.#You are not immune to propaganda etc etc#But even then there are a lot of things like all the included screenshots where he. Doesn't actually seem to like/trust Cocolia much.#I think Serval was a really good influence on him as a kid. He might have turned out much much worse without her.#and even with how I've written him here. I don't think he's normally slow to act or one to stand aside and make other people lead.#it's just that this specifically was a pretty extreme circumstance for him.#and also he openly states elsewhere that Pela is overbearing and he tries not to interfere with her work whenever possible nskzhdjdjd#Pela too. I don't know that I normally see her as someone with a bad temper or quick to anger.#But again; extreme circumstances haha#Bc like. they both would have seen what happened to Serval when she stood up to Cocolia. they know damn well what's going to happen to them.#if they fuck this up and get caught then they're done.#and I mean. What are they supposed to do? they're two people against the highest authority of the entire nation.#regardless I do love Gepard agonizing over this in the future after Bronya takes over and everything has settled down#did he do the right thing? did he make the right choice? if he went vigilante how many soldiers would have died without his protection?#would Belobog have fallen completely? how many people died because he DIDN'T run away? was it actually enough?#I love characters forced between a rock and a hard place. no good options. pick your poison.#no winning- only weighing what you can and cannot bear to lose.#make your choice and decide whether you want to rot or to burn.
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long!!! distance!!!! sucks!!!!!!
#I have no idea how long distance couples survive#I'm losing my mind over my squish being so far away#wdym I can't hug them :(#wdym there's a whole ass month left until they come back????#and like. I wanna text and call them so often but I'm scared of being too much yk#but equally it's been a week since I last heard their voice and I'm going insane#I also hate the time difference!!!!!! there's like a three hour window in which we both MIGHT be free but it's hard to coordinate :(#I just. I've never missed someone this much before#I imagine being reunited almost every day#sigh#also kinda scared about the fact that we're going to go from not having seen each other for 3 months to LIVING TOGETHER#I'm really hyped don't get me wrong#but also. aaaaaaa#(post inspired by the fact that they haven't messaged me back yet despite it being only 9am for them lol)#me? clingy? haha whaaaaaat nooooo#comso rambles#queerplatonic yearning hours#qpr yearning#queerplatonic#aroace#long distance love
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Suddenly somewhat sad Roy and Jamie didn’t get more violent with each other in 1x05, not because I’m Barbara and like them a bit bruised*, but because having them both getting red-carded would have been extremely funny.
And by extremely funny I mean them being sent to the dressing room all by themselves and worked up, and the tension and frustration and anger and shame and—
Because the thing is, they’d still be really fucking furious but without the presence of an audience spurring them onto Extra Performative Masculinity, and with the dawning embarassment of being sent off for fighting your own team mate and leaving your team two men down…
Mmm. Super tense. Uncomfortable. Weird. Could go a number of ways, and they’re all really fucking delightful.
#*i’m not not barbara either to be fair…#they’d both think they were in the right bc the other is an arsehole#but they’re both super vain and increasingly aware of an upset by how very very bad the optics are#and roy might start to think that he should be older and wiser than this#even if jamie IS a prick#but in a strange way they’re in this together now#they’ll both be in the dog house if richmond loses#which they for the purposes of this fantasy but also realism absolutely do#you’d think ted would think to send someone off with them#to stave off further potential carnage#but he is slightly busy with having his team down two players so#beard does note the danger but keeps quiet for beard reasons#nate notes the danger too but hopes roy will actually break jamie’s jaw#i want to fic this now...#jamie tartt#roy kent#roy & jamie#1x05#my stuff
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scrapnik island is soo good !!! I really want mecha and silver to be farming buddies now!! :,)
#kickdraw#sonic idw#scrapnik island#scrapnik mecha sonic#silver the hedgehog#sonic#idw sonic spoilers#old drawing but i finally slapped some colors on it to post cause im not going to otherwise hadkfjghadf#both of them getting arcs at the same time and ian saying mecha could come back sooner than you might think is making my lose my mind#silver would accept mecha he's one of the characters who would probably just hang out with him right off the bat imo#kinda would fit the arc he's in right now...#please.... hear me out... i want them to be besties....#nothing like 2 separate characters who have never met turning to farming to fill the void of purpose in their new lives#LET THEM BE FRIENDS!! PLEASE!!!!
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How did the Wonderbolts find out/react to Spitfire and Rainbow's relationship?
Ok I will focus on Fleetfoot here because otherwise it'll be too long. I ended up drawing a few panels but can't finish them right now, so I'm giving you all the sketches.
I hc Fleetfoot to know Spitfire the longest right after Soarin. They're close friends (Fleets considers Spitty her best friend even) and even though she's got a pretty intense rivalry with Rainbow, they also started a close and intense friendship after Rainbow joined. Fleetfoot considers her friendship to both to be very special.
The scene in question happens during some holiday, general WB vacation, or just a weekend. It's one of the AUs where Spitty and Rainbow start dating and get closer while still in the WBs. At some point they don't want to stay at home and want to show physical intimacy in public instead of acting like friends. But both being well known (especially Spitfire) immediately excludes all bigger and nearer towns. They can't just go out and hold hands and kiss without the press immediately writing about it and it ending in a huge scandal for the Wonderbolts.
They end up spending this specific date in a small village which hosts some minor festival that day. It's tiny, not that well known and is perfect for them. People don't recognize them outside of their uniforms and signature outfits.
It's pure happenstance that Fleetfoot is at the same no-name festival, visiting either an old friend or having to spend some time there due to some family issue. She notices the familiar, colorful hair in the corner of her eye. The hair is a lot more vibrant and visible in the up-do Rainbow wears - a bit foolish of her to not wear a cap like Spitfire. But Rainbow being able to test, investigate and discover her own femininity in the safety of their private time is a big part of her. Plus, Spitfire also didn't think it would be a problem.
From the outfit, Fleetfoot wouldn't have guessed it's really Rainbow further down the street. But she recognizes her hair and laughter immediately. As for Spitfire, even with a hat and glasses, she'd recognize her a mile away as well.
It's a bizarre scene for Fleetfoot and seeing them kiss feels like a gut punch. At this point she's often tried to push Spitfire to go out and at least have some sexy flings, some fun nights with nameless girls instead of her just drowning in WB work. Spitfire always dismissed her, saying she can focus on romance later when she can actually date someone in private and not have the press nonstop on her heels. Similarly Rainbow always denied liking someone and wanting to focus on being a great Wonderbolt member, being the newest addition. The most Fleetfoot got out of her, was doing silly "Smash or Pass" games the nights out after training or a big event.
Fleetfoot would never even have guessed that either would be interested in anyone, especially not each other. And seeing them in front of her seems is like a dream. She feels like she's seeing two completely different people in front of her and not her friends: Rainbow with her more delicate and feminine attire than usual, and Spitfire who's acting a lot more flirty, soft and seductive instead of her serious, rough or dudebro-joking attitude as captain.
Fleetfoot considered her relationship to both as special. She's not just "a friend" and that's the first reason why catching them in the act affects her this deeply.
The second reason is that she takes the Wonderbolts, their reputation, and especially the team bond just as serious as Spitfire. Seeing them involved romantically goes not only against the Wonderbolt code and rules, but would raise red flags even if it was allowed. There are a gazillion reasons why trouble could and - in Fleets' eyes - would follow. Can either separate work from relationship? Can they stay neutral? Will there be favoritism? Will Rainbow start to slack off? Will she distract Spitfire form her duties? Will there be silent grudges in the team? Will the team and performance suffer?
Fleets is usually pretty outgoing and wears her emotions on her sleeve. This time she swallows her anger and other complicated emotions and keeps quiet. The desire to just go up to and confront them is big - but she doesn't want this to end in a catastrophe for the team. Also she feels Spitfire could talk and explain herself and Rainbow out of it - probably playing it all down since Fleetfoot doesn't even have evidence.
So Fleetfoot waits for now, hoping to observe and collect evidence she can use against them once her judgement day comes. She's still convinced this is bad and will hurt everyone in the long run. But even with a very close eye on them, she doesn't notice anything. Their performance doesn't falter. They're both as motivated to be peak Wonderbolts as ever. There are no noticeable longer or romantic touches. No special eye gazing. Rainbow gets no special treatment, quite the opposite - Fleets wonders if maybe she gets more criticism and work than the others (which is 100% the case. Spitfire does overcompensate a bit in her attempt to hide their relationship) She doesn't see them meet up in a romantic way. She never sees a kiss or romantic gesture again. And even when she spies on them when they think they're all alone, they don't act differently to regular teammates.
There are days where Fleetfoot wonders if her mind way playing a trick on her and that she saw two other people that day. Only sometimes though. And with time moving on and her not seeing any bad consequences, her emotions towards this secret mellow out and transform into a different, more empathetic nature.
There is more going on and some follow-up with Fleetfoot and Rainbow which also covers Rainbow's insecurity about feminine clothing - but it's a long post already. I might want to doodle something for it as well, when that time comes.
#Fleets has the biggest scenario/hc of all the WBs#There isn't as big one for Soarin and the others and i feel I might need to post them in a separate post or ask...#Feel free to ask again if you want to know specifically anon#otherwise I might take quite a while until I post#also I gotta work on the monthly challenge that's why I didn't clean the sketches up yet#Listen I love fleets#her feeling like she gets left behind by both of them?#feeling like she's losing her best friend (Spitfire)???#I love it#mlp#my art#ask chim#fleetfoot#spitdash#spitfire#mlp spitfire#rainbow dash#wonderbolts#sketches#headcanons
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its kinda weird to think but in my comics story ghirahim is probably the most 'normal' one of the main characters
he still has his dad master after all
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#i keep thinking i need to make ghirahim more fked up but then i remember that happens through losing the only thing he cares about#...and in my story not jsut demise but also hylia and fi bc yes he likes all of them#i keep feeling like im letting down ghirahim fans bc hes not yet like in skyward sword#and thats two points im worried about bc demise isnt the kind of evil monster most might expect#and yes demise i ghirahims dad- more or less literally#he is forged from a part of demises own spirit AND was raised by him like a son#and while losing their home fked them both up ghirahim still cared the most about demise#:^)))
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the never stop blowing up vhs is where cute twinks go to get harmed
#not art#nsbu spoilers#kirk blade.... johnny manhattan..... maybe tenuously cosmo chase#also genuinely I Love that vic ethanol is showing himself to be bit of a dick#and kingskin conversely First Actual Communication With The Player is like. idk I just work here#(I am vibrating in my seat abt liv bloodlust. shes experiencing a bit of emotional consequence. hope she powers thru it and#becomes even worse)#I also love that g13 and jack manhattan are both like. gone#I know in adventuring party they're charting it to shape up as like. usha also slowly losing herself to the work like g13 did#and them becoming one entity entirely in the sense that their selves stop mattering in the face of their hacker capacity#(also called the Forum Moderator Dilemma)#but I also like to think that g13 handed it back to usha cleanly in the second episode with that one interaction#and is now fully unplugged from everything. left the movie. man is Sleeping#we all agree that paula ate jack manhattan tho I think it's fine to assume that#and! the way russell has been like. fully going whole hog full tilt into helping other people and moving the plot along#while Suggesting That Doing Self Reflection And Learning Lessons From This World Might Help to Other People#like I love that. 1/lieutenant syndrome but also 2/extremely transfem coded#like past the ''ohh I have realisationd I'm coming to'' stage. far past. man is bored with thinking abt genders#not new realisation to him! had that thought two decades ago. not motivated enough by anything to change anything#I think I just love the scenario of like magical mystical journey in a fantasy world clearly designed to make you contemplate ur gender#and ur like oh no what? we did that years ago. whats up#deeply interested tho. open up russell we wanna see whats up with u#dang is perfect no note 10/10 more important than anything else he is genre aware and savvy and that truly is all he needs here#the ''let's make it fun'' scene he does with liv is SO good I love him. Im so scared the vhs will snatch him away. hes too genre perfect
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“least favorite” isn’t anywhere close to bad. it just shows how damn hard the competition is going, but we’re talking about gold medals all around for each actor i’ve seen portray the doctor so far.
#and again on acting alone. i think i might prefer him over tennant in the long run.#which isnt saying tenannt is bad either its saying like. i just love them both but i love what smith brings to the table just slightly more.#i dont really put the war doctor on my rankings very seriously because he only had the one rpisode. and it was. a bad episode.#but his performance endeared me enough to him eith his haunted eyes and the weight he’s carrying that i would. possibly with a bias.#put him between ten and eleven.#and then first place depends on the day but i think twelve has pulled ahead of nine just barely. like damn. capaldi Gets It man. eccleston#also Got It in similar ways but obviously his shorter tenure did give him less tjme to show it off and twelve’s gotten three seasons to show#just how fantastically capaldi pulls together this grieving weirdo. this man who loves so hard it burns him up. who is so scared of his own#goodness and losing it. he’s so good guys.#god i cant wait to see where jodie falls on this list im really excited for her take. and mr gatwa too.#and the classic who guys obviously. i mean i already like the guy they get to play One in the audios and im really curious how he measures#up against hartnell(?)’s original performance#i know the vibes will be very different than those of nuwho but im excited :)
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actually so evil how much of hal's internal world gets obliterated with the rewriting of his relationships with jessica and martin.
#hal jordan#empyrean posting#ok going in the tags because im not actually v confident in my understanding of his character. i read all of his 80s/90s stuff but forgot#90% of it but ANYWAY.#so much of him just does not make sense with how geoff johns characterises him and his relationships with his parents particularly the#parallax stuff simply because of how much his relationship with the guardians and their apathy/'betrayal' is influenced by hal's original#relationship with his dad. like at its heart it's pretty much the same dynamic in how hal blindly trusts and sort of idolises the guardians#despite their repeated infractions in hope of... something in return just as he had with his father and the abuse he suffered at martin's#hands. that's what makes his anger at the guardians make sense when it does show itself because the relationship parallel didn't stop there.#as with martin hal gets nothing for his devotion. he gets nothing for doing everything that's asked of him and more and it ends the same way#too: with a man in the sky burning like a newborn star. and you lose so much of that nuance and intrigue behind that if you just make#jessica the 'bad one' because!!! you cheapen it!!!!#the whole idea of hal is that he has his father's face but his mother's scars#(to me). in the sense that they both reacted to martin the same way with that cognisance of who he was as a man yet inability to pull away#because... love. both the love they had for him and the conviction that he did or could love them too. and jessica arguably did eventually#but also she didnt did she? because she held onto that notion of love till the very end. the few scraps she had she ballooned outwards until#they became the whole. but hal didnt have even that and he spent his whole life chasing it & running away from wanting it at the same time#like i think there's something so interesting to the fact that he had to be convinced that flying was what he wanted to do. how much of that#was touched by his father? the fear that he was already too much like him than he could bear to be? he already had his face now he had his#dreams and longing for the sky. how much more could he have before he began repeating the cycle?#and at the end he even had his father's death. burning in the clouds. like there's so much there and that's not even touching on how it#impacts his relationships with other heroes. not just in the sense of why did kyle clark and diana get to keep their close yet complex#relationships with their moms when hal had to lose his (although yeah why did they) but also just how he lets himself come across to them.#because it's on purpose right? that he lets them think his reflection of his father is born out of unadulterated love for a man worthy of it#? he has his father's job he wears his father's jacket he smiles his father's smile. what else are they supposed to think.#and isnt that interesting!!! that this man who is so committed to being good & just can lie so casually to people he thinks of as friends!!!#can you see how that might be his mother through and through!!! in how she might have glossed over the abuse to other people and herself!!!#can you see how in spite of it all he might want to be perceived as his father that paragon of masculinity and resent that he is not!!!#do you understand how everything he loves has been poisoned!!! im thinking of that scene where he tells bruce about watching martin die &#wouldnt it have been so much more interesting through this lens. how he is both revealing & obfuscating at once. i hate the change sm
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Here have this
#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#welcome home arg#welcome home puppet arg#wally darling#frank frankly#Relates to my…#I refuse to call it an au#It was once an interpretation of what I thought the Welcome Home lore might be about#But then as I wrote it I realized#“Yeah this is far too angsty for Welcome Home”#So we are NOT calling it an AU#We are calling it like a story or a fanfiction or something#Because it was originally based on theories and then took a path of its own#But basically this is Frank’s POV#Wally isn’t downright evil there’s more to the story than that#Don’t wanna spoil anything(not that the story is anything better than an angsty mess of a teenager’s writing) but Frank sees Wally this way#And he is losing his sense of reality#Both of them are actually#Ye @:3#my art#pawfulofdoodles
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