#and i honestly really thought i could be with my best friend forever and it’d just be the two of us

[midniallsnack]

(prev tags: #as an aroace myself this can be devastating sometimes #just the constant fear your friends are just waiting to move on to something better #and all you want is for a few people to love you the same way you love them)

Saw a reddit post today about a girl who was upset that her childhood best friend replaced a photo of the two of them in his wallet with one of him and his girlfriend. And while yeah, she was being unreasonable with a lot of what she was saying, I totally understand the sadness of a friend "replacing" you with someone they have romantic feelings for. Makes it worse when the top comment is this

Every single comment on this post is about how family and romantic relationships always take precedence over friendships. I don't have anything more to say to this aside from the fact that... this is why it's hard for aroaces to imagine futures for themselves. Society drills it into your head that you're going to live in a world where you are no one's priority if you don't have romantic relationships and it fucking sucks

[lighthouseas]

hi all! i know that i haven’t posted for a while, but since the end of the year is fast approaching, i thought i’d make a post detailing my appreciation for my lovely mutuals . (if you saw this post earlier because tumblr was being a bitch, no you didn’t <3333)

anyway, without further ado- and in no particular order-

bee’s end-of-the-year MUTUAL APPRECIATION POST!!!

@hazmatazz - OHHH MAN. SILLY GUY ALERT. starting off strong with the lovely the amazing the fantabulous HAZ HAZMATAZZ. haz, being your friend and fellow Silly Squad member has been such an honor. you’re so funny and sweet and smart and make the best posts that make me giggle. and even though i don’t talk in it much, seeing so many Shenanigans go down in the discord server is seriously the funniest thing. I could just. squish you. you make me so happy and it’s an honor to be your friend. seriously hope 2024 treats you amazingly bc you deserve all of it <3333

@cannibalismyuri - SARA!!!! sara my lovely ohhh you are. the funniest. seriously. i have been reduced to Tears of laughter from posts on your blog. you have such an energy about you that is completely unmatched. even with Fandom Weirdness and the like, you’ve still pulled through and kept being your silliest self (and let me be silly with you which is awesome), and i commend you for that. aaaand not to get sappy or whatever but i really do look up to and admire you. you inspire me a lot. also, i love your new url. i want to eat it. pun intended. HAVE THE BEST 2024 EVER <3333

@qulizalfos - LIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. everyone listen up okay. liza is the loml IF ANYONE EVEN CARESSS. liza oh my god i adore you and your endless enthusiasm. seriously your comments on tsad are comments that i look back on when i need motivation because they’re just. so sweet. you are so sweet. we’ve only been mutuals since this SUMMER and yet it feels like we’ve known each other forever. i love screaming about things with you and i love the fact that my FIC is in your BIO??? HELLOOOO??? also okay. can we talk about your writing and art. liza i cannot say ENOUGH how talented you are. if i could staple your fics and art to the entire st fandom’s forehead so they would have to look at it forever then i would. your brain is so ginormous and the way you describe things and think about things is something i could only dream of doing. literally adore everything about you and wish i could hang out with you and wayli so we could all be a little insane together <33333 love you. LOVE YOUUUU I hope 2024 is awesomesauce for you <33333333

@wayward-sherlock - SPEAKING of wayli. oh wayli. if i had time to write a 10 page essay detailing how much of an impact you have had on me i would. seriously though you are just the sweetest, kindest, and most positive person ever. seeing you blow up my notes makes me grin So Hard because like oh man. wayli likes my blog. THEEE wayli thinks i’m cool. wtfff….anyway. you are so smart and it shows in your literally breathtaking writing and analysis (ANALYSIS FIRM!!!) you’re so perceptive and it honestly blows me away. reading your writing is so mesmerizing and just. sends me on an adventure. actually just scrolling through your BLOG sends me on an adventure because you always have the best stuff on there. honestly, I just wanna give you the biggest hug and tell you how awesome you are because rambling in a tumblr post simply is not enough. all’s that to say, i’m really looking forward to this coming year that will hopefully include more screaming about fanfiction in our discord messages and more of us being friends. because i love being your friend and it’d be so awesome if one day we could hang out together and be a tad Insane. doopel dopple gang STICKS TOGETHER AMIRITE?? anyway. i love you so much and wish you all the best in 2024 <333333

@antibyler - spencer HIII i know it’s been a minute since we last talked but can i just say that it has been an HONOR being your mutual this year. you’re so cool and fun and easy to talk to and also are a Fellow NHIE Fan which makes you even cooler. don’t think i’ve ever seen a bad opinion on your blog, which i know is saying a lot but it’s true To Me okay. seriously could never ever imagine Not following spencer basiltonpitch antibyler because like. that’s some essential dash content right there. THEEE blog to ever. makes the tumblr experience about 2034549650 times better. hope 2024 treats you wonderfully, my triple b mutual WOO <3

@versa-vices - FINNIEEEE!!!!!! you are my sunshine my special sunshine you make me happyyyyyyyy when skies are grayyyy….like actually though you are such a sunshine. seeing your comments on my posts never fails to make me giggle. a Silly Squad member that’s for sure. but like. being your tumblr bestie this past year has been so much fun. hanging out on the dash together and being Slightly Unhinged in the discord messages has been one of the highlights of my year. you’re so sweet and lovely and i don’t think it would be tumblr without you (those 10 minutes where you deactivated were HARD man okay. what am i supposed to do without u :(() okay anyhoo. thank you for being the bestest ever and hope 2024 treats you well <333

@light-lanterne - angel hiii! it’s been a bit since we’ve interacted but i needed to talk about how kind and patient you’ve been throughout literally everything because tumblr can be a little much sometimes. your kindness and determination to make so many beautiful graphics is absolutely incredible. i still look back on the graphics you’ve made for my fics sometimes, and it’s just…amazing. you’re so talented both in your art and your writing. when times got tough in the Fandom, i could always count on your blog to be a cozy and warm retreat from the craziness. it’s an honor to be your mutual, and i hope 2024 treats you kindly, because you seriously deserve it <33

@booksandpaperss - ELLI HIII!! holy shit one of my oldest mutuals. here when the ancient scrolls were written. elli , you have made my fandom experience so much more enjoyable. what with your huge brain and amazing takes, you always keep things real and i admire that about you. you’re also just. so easy to talk to. both because you’re ridiculously funny and also because you’re so nice to me like what. i love Discussing things with you, especially when it felt like we were sitting in a corner sipping tea and having a grand old time while the entire fandom went batshit. uscore fr. also, your comments on tsad…dude…they made me and STILL make me tear up. you read everything with such an attentive eye and then give the sweetest compliments on it. it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. you’re just. so awesome okay. never forget that. hope u have a wonderful 2024 <3333

@karenchildress - hi jo!!!!!!!!!! i know we don’t interact as much but like. you’re such a joy to see on the dash i’m being so fr right now. how are you so funny like some of your posts still make me laugh to this day. you also keep things Real which i appreciate a lot, people tend not to do that nowadays T-T. we need more jo karenchildresses in the st fandom i think. things would improve marginally. anyway. keep being cool and fun and hope 2024 brings you much joy <3

@homohabu - oh man you’re just. you’re so nice. your blog is so inviting and has the loveliest colors all over it that make me very happy. you’ve always been so lovely to me and it makes me smile. you’re also another one of my oldest mutuals…and you’ve still stuck around through everything. thank you for having an awesome blog and being an awesome person! hope 2024 is good for you!!!!!!!!

@kuntniss - sierra!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hiiiii it’s been a minute but can i just say that your blog makes me so so so super happy whenever i look at it. both your reblogs and original posts are just. great vibes. great vibes all around. you’ve been so nice to me this past year and it’s seriously been so wonderful interacting with you and looking forward to seeing your posts. being your mutual is so fun. i hope 2024 brings you so many good things, you deserve all of them <33333333

@weirdo09  - cade! i know you haven’t been online in a while but i just wanted to say that you’ve been such a wonderful friend to me this past year. you’re so creative and i loved hearing your ideas in my inbox and getting tagged in your wonderful. i hope you’re doing okay now, because you were honestly such a joy to see on the dash and in my notes. also, your ever changing themes were always a nice surprise to come across when i opened your blog, lol. hope 2024 treats you well :)

@holyvirgilscriptures - virgil !!!! oh my god i adore your blog so badddd like. i could seriously scroll through it forever it’s just banger after banger after banger. you always have the best takes on like. Everything. also FELLOW TAWOG BROTHER IN ARMS HELLOOOO !!!! BEST TASTE IN MEDIA AWARD GOES TO YOU MY FRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway. you have made this year so so so enjoyable just with the Existence of your blog. this coming year i hope we can interact a bit more because you’re super awesome <333 may 2024 bring you many good things! 

@ollsonline - oliver <3333 my lovely. since we became mutuals you have been nothing but the sweetest, kindest, friendliest person to me. you’re so welcoming to everyone and it absolutely warms my heart. you’ve been such an amazing friend to me this year and we should totally talk more because you’re super cool and awesome also!!! thank you for being the best and i hope 2024 treats you kindly <3

okay that’s all i’ve got! to any mutuals i did not get to mention: i love you so much. you have made The Tumblr Experience that much more bearable with your endless kindness. i love all of you so much, and am wishing you a happy new year through the screen! MWAH!!!!!!!

[ev1llesb1an]

Documentation of my comphet throughout the years 🧍‍♀️

Okay so I thought it’d be funny to talk abt my most intense male fixation eras as a lesbian (idk i’m just shitposting into the void again) judge me all u want (it is probably needed) but i need ppl to understand the real me 🙏

IT CROPPED HALF HIS FACE OUT but i just realised if you aren’t british ur gonna have no idea who he is anyone (he’s lachlan white from emmerdale) omg this was an ERA everyone around me thought i was going insane (i was) but like they just didn’t get it he slayed so hard at a level that will never be reached (literally) also tom atkinson on sex education was like a full circle moment for me omg but anyways i was like 11-12 here these were literally my formative years this changed me FOREVER don’t judge he slayed omg

THIS okay so u can’t even blame me for this one it’s just correct. yes he’s like walking masculinity stereotype BUT he also had depth and was interesting 😌 the fanfics were SO GOOD this is when i really got into fanfiction and accidentally read smut where someone get pregnant in the hunger games 🧍‍♀️i read this one fic that was like x reader AND THEY STRAIGHT UP BOTH DIED but anyways. i read fanfics abt literally everyone thg character (read abt women and convinced myself i was still straight lmfao) but he was the stand out for me. i recently revisited this era and the fics ppl write on ao3 r INSANE omg like what is wrong with u ppl ( i say this lovingly but also wtf )

OMGOMGOMG BEST ERA OF MY LIFE u actually don’t understand u just had to be there. a solid percentage of my brain even to this day is made up of this man. this is like the stupidest thing ever but when i was like 14 i would just mirror his personality (and tone down the arsehole part obvs) so that i could get more talkative AND IT ACTUALLY WORKED nobody in the whole world will ever understand how much he means to me (i don’t rly understand it myself tbh) and ik ppl literally fuckinf despise him but i will not tolerate the dandy mott slander bc he is literally part of my core identity atp i revisit him every few months just to fully reconnect with my inner being. did anyone read Companion? that shit was crazy also i wrote a fic abt him on wattpad and people actually READ IT so anyways best era of my life it truly never got better i rly hit me peak (i had 0 friends) the few friends i had literally told me i talked abt him too much and it made them like me less 💀

this was arguably my most chill era like yea i was pretty obsessive but with marvel it’s so normalised to be so intense abt everything i kinda just fit right in. there’s too much professor fanfiction r u ppl okay 🧍‍♀️ also more actor fanfiction than i have ever seen for any other man in my LIFE but the capitalism went hard during this era the fluff was so good. arguably my most comforting era? idk i can’t rly explain that one

okay so these two r kinda completely different but also (for obvious reasons) the exact same. gotham was my most openly gay era and for that i will forever be grateful HOWEVER the kristen kringle haters were doing WAY TOO MUCH like she’s already dead why u doing her like that constantly (u will see this sentiment echoed later abt someone else hmmm i wonder who) but yea and then YES i was a paul dano lesbian (literally wasn’t out as lesbian at this point lmao) honestly this is probably the era my friends hated the most they would either awkwardly pretend to agree/care abt the shit i was saying or straight up tell me i was delusional 💀 my friends even now still call it my worst era but i LOVED IT kinda solidified my position at the bottom of the hellish secondary school hierarchy but i still had a good time. the paul dani riddler fanfics r next level tho the way ppl would just post STALKER fics constantly with like zero warnings and it was never labelled as yandere 🧍‍♀️i also got in an argument with a writer on wattpad bc they made the riddler and the oc have like a 6 year age gap and they met when she was 10 and he was like 16 💀 other than that good vibes all round

tbh this era was pretty brief i can’t fully explain what happened here like the vibes were immaculate but also insane WHY IS THERE SM YANDERE FANFIC peter parker is so nice but then in fanfics it’s like 👹 but i rly like spider-man HOWEVER this then led me to my final destination on the comphet journey…

omg were finally at the final stop the peak of comphet ( i came out as lesbian within this era ) arguably not my finest hour bc i swore i would never watch criminal minds bc the number of seasons is WAY TOO MUCH but here we are i watched it bc i read too much fanfic abt this man. i have lots of criticism for the fandom but he in himself is acc a rly good character. this was supposed to be like my ethical era but he’s acc killed like a bunch of ppl and thomas gibson is MESSY (don’t cancel me pls i say that lovingly 🫶) the haley hotchner misogyny nearly killed me off i don’t think i’ve ever been so miserable in a fandom and the fanfics kinda take feminism back a few hundred years but pretty good besides that

anyways there is my brainrot i hope the two (at most) ppl who will read this enjoyed 🫶 LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO im gonna say i posted this in honour of international lesbian day even tho that was several days ago

[pagerspages]

Dear Dad Four Months

Dear Dad

Hey Dad. It’s been four months since you died. Miss you. Not much has changed for me honestly. Still have the same job. Still don’t really do much outside of work. I’m still single. I’ve been trying dating but I’m just scared to put myself out there because I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to be close to anyone again. I deleted all of my dating apps. Kinda regret that now because I’m lonely and wish I had people to talk to. Remember that girl I told you about that I went on a couple of dates with? I told her I wasn’t actually ready to date. I think in reality I was just scared to let anyone get close to me. (I've redownloaded them since I started this letter)

I’ve been real sad lately. Nothing more than what I’ve been through before but it’s not like that makes it easier. I got established at a doctors office so I’ve been considering going and talking to them about getting on antidepressants. I’m sure it would help me function but I just don’t want to be a robot. I guess being an alive robot would be better than a dead person. Not that I’m going to kill myself or anything. I did have the thought that if I did kill myself and we ended up in the same place it’d be pretty cool to see you again even though you’d be disappointed in me. 

My friend's dad died the other day. Their relationship was really bad. Not anywhere near ours. It made me realize how awkward people are around grief. I didn’t have a clue what to say to him. The people in this group of friends barely said anything when I told them you died, I realize now that’s because I didn’t say much. I’m doing my best to check in with my friend though. 

I got to thinking again about the things you’ll miss being gone. Obviously the big ones this year. Your birthday a couple days after you died. Your anniversary the month after. My birthday in June. And the ones you will miss. Moms birthday. Thanksgiving. Christmas. I’m half tempted to just not celebrate Christmas this year. If it hurts this bad just being the 4 month anniversary how the hell am I going to feel on christmas? How are you supposed to feel on the first Christmas after your dad dies? I guess time will tell. 

I realized today what our last conversation was. You texted me asking me to pick up a card for mom that you could give her on Valentines day. I was so annoyed because I felt like it was so out of my way to pick up a $2 card and dive it 20 minutes to you. You’re now a lot further away than 20 minutes. I’m sorry. I can’t even remember if I got you a card or not now. 

Love you. Miss you forever. 

-Ky

[su8arandspite]

on today’s oc brain rot:

Hawkins High Prom, 1985!

prom night 1985

- someday, I’ll make this an actual blurb, but that day is not today so instead here’s the next best thing

- by the time prom season rolls around, steve is no less in love with beth and growing both more smitten and in denial by the day

- so, naturally, he suggests to her that they should go as friends!! bc they’re best friends!! (upon hearing this, I’d like to note that the force of tiffany and amy’s collective eye roll could be felt all the way in Ohio)

- there’s no one else either of them can even fathom spending the night with anyways

- so, when steve shows up on her doorstep, corsage in hand, he is buzzing with anticipation

- but whatever small talk debbie and rich were trying to make with him falls upon deaf ears the second beth turns the corner and begins the descent down the stairs

- on their way to spy from the living room, katy and dustin remind steve to close his mouth before he starts drooling

- and he can’t even quip back at them bc she’s breathtaking and it’s so unfair

- the dress she has on is perfectly tailored and it looks like it was made just for her; the pouf, the off-shoulder look neckline, the pink, the taffeta, even her satin minnie mouse pumps

- and it’s nice to take a night to just be normal teenagers after all the shit life’s thrown at them

- dancing like idiots

- slow dancing to a pop song bc he just really wants to be close to her

- aNd STEVE oh my god..,.

- when beth wins prom queen he’s just all 🥹😍 and proud boyfriend best friend bc she deserves it more than anyone else

- but no one’s really more surprised than steve when he wins king

- bc honestly he thought it’d be some asshole like billy hargove

- smitten, giggly beans slow dancing as king and queen

- to beth’s favorite song, cuz of fucking course steve is that kind of a cheeseball and he’d 100% request it

- and i think that was the moment (slow dancing, with half the school watching them, and beth clinging to him) that steve swore to himself that they were going to be exact like this for their first dance- as husband and wife, not prom king and queen

- but his favorite part of the whole night?

- the end, when beth has gone home and she’s half-asleep, wearing one of his t-shirts that’s way too big on her

- and he’s sneaking into the bed next to her

- and both of them just wanting to spend forever with the other next to them

- and if they made out more than friends probably should that night? it’s none of my business

[redemptioninterlude]

five times comforted for avery & mateo :>

5 times ... meme ( accepting ) + @ofchaotics // mateo five times the receiver comforted the sender ( i reversed it bc i couldn't read this shit on the plane sorry )

Does he know the effect his presence has on others? Avery playing like it barely mattered to her, that she’s here for a good time, not a long time, because they’re just like that. That he tells her that they gotta call this whatever it is QUITS because he’s gone and gotten himself a girlfriend and it wouldn’t be right to her. Avery’s just blinking back at him because she didn’t know it’d be like that, and maybe she’s kind of hurt that he didn’t consider her in all of this, that maybe she wanted to be his too, but she’s the kind of girl who’d pretend with flippant ease that this was nothing. Eyes rolling as she tells him, “Well duh,” because she was no homewrecker, even if she was painted in that light more often then she wasn’t with others, and she cracks a grin when he’s left fumbling with her response. “What. Do you want me to be sad about it?” That wasn’t a feeling that he was yet allowed privy to, and she made that clear in the lines she drew in that moment, her heart a vaulted thing with walls built to be sky high. There’s no room for the kind of hurt that he might introduce, but like the empathetic tall fuck that he was, his hand smoothes through her hair, an awkward motion. “For now.” He adds, as if making some kind of strange, internal decision for it. Vulpine eyes finding his own, holding there for a moment before she barks with a laugh. “What? Putting an expiration date on this whole relationship thing already? That’s not very gentlemanly of you, Mateo!” But oh, did it feel good to know. He’d be back. Of course he’d be back.

Part of her feels kind of stupid for trusting in that FUCKING JERK. She comes home to find him with someone else in her bed, that he has the keys to her place and would dare use it as a place to carry on with his fucking affairs, when he thought she was out in New York doing yet another show. She’s home early, a flight caught that she thought would mean that she could surprise him but she’s the one instead watching someone’s body slide, serpentine on top of him, in her fucking sheets. It’s a hysterical moment, with Avery kicking the both of them out naked as she screams at them from her window, setting his shit on fire that she throws out into the street after him, and of course she’s the one painted as being unreasonable, but Mateo’s the first one there. Offering up her favourite cigarettes and a joint like some kind of peace offering to barter entry into her place, as she’s telling him she wants to get rid of fucking everything. “I hate it, I hate everything now-“ and he doesn’t tell her that she’s being unfair or crazy, like her now freshly minted ex did when he was being run out of her place. Instead he offers to help her do it. “Want me to carry the mattress out?” When Avery declared, angrily, that she was going to sleep on the floor. And honestly, if he wasn’t dating that stupid boytoy DJ from Columbia, she would have fucking kissed him, instead laughing as she hugged him close, craving and needing that comfort right now more than anything.

The whole fight and falling out between her and her ex best friend hurt. It’s one of those things that she doesn’t talk about with anybody else, but it strikes her somewhere deep. There’s so many reasons for the potential why of it, but she supposes none of it mattered, not really. “I always thought SHE AND I would be friends forever…” there’s a quietness to her voice, curled tightly within Mateo’s embrace as he wrapped her up close, her head against his chest. “I didn’t think it’d be the success thing that got in the way. I thought we were better than that? She was just… you know. Getting started. Like I know that I’ve gotten a leg up because of who my parents are. It didn’t mean that I’m like… not good, either.” There are words that can’t be taken back, and they sting still within her chest, her heart mourning the friendship that she thought that they had had. It was supposed to be the two of them, through thick and thin… that the now feels like a fucking fever dream, and she wished that she could call her like always, where they call to catch up, like nothing were remiss. But Avery knows it’s over, dead as anything, her own pride refusing to allow for anything less. At least Mateo was there… carding his fingers through her hair, old motions for new hurts, wishing that it didn’t have to be so fucking complicated, but she supposed that was growing up for the both of them.

The baby wasn’t supposed to be a thing in the first place. They’re not married, her mother says, scandalised, as if she didn’t know that fact between them, dark eyes fascinated on her stomach as she tells them with Mateo there with her. Avery, stiff, as her gaze moved between her mother and her father, saying that she loves him and nothing else mattered. A declaration that was stated and placed into THE GROUNDS BETWEEN THEM. It hurts to know that they’re more worried about their image, less than kind things said about her own career, the way that it seemed she was more obsessed with fame than she was dedicated to the craft, an accusation that leaves her cheeks enflamed, looking to Mateo as a silent cue that it was time for them to leave. Gently saying goodbye, wasn’t he always the consummate example of manners with them? Even though she knew he was burning too for the rejection that came with this for the moment, though she tells him, unconvincingly, that it’s just nerves. Just her parents trying to deal with their own shock. But it hurts, doesn’t it? Come the night when she cries about it, and he holds her close and tells her it’s going to be alright, that she wasn’t the sell out that they accuse her of being, and that she still mattered… and that they still had, at the end of the day, each other.

France is beautiful. Stop number three in their world tour away from home, their escape from the sadness that existed there after they lose the baby. It’s getting better, the way that they deal with the sorrow. Both of them creating more, now, than ever, as she lounges in the sun and paints, the colour coming out overtop of the sketches in light pencil beneath it, trying new things with new mediums and new styles. Brand new everything, obsessive, and nobody gets it better than Mateo, who’s wearing his new role as Grammy winner so well. And god, Avery is just so proud of him, the both of them now MAKING THE MOST of their new lives like this until they’re ready to go home, which, Avery has broached quietly the other night. Mateo hums and haws and says maybe. But there’s something to do first. At first she doesn’t get it, until he comes up to her now, sweeping her up into a kiss that feels oh so lovely… distracted with the feeling of his mouth bruising to her own that she doesn’t think anything of him taking hold of her hand. Nothing, until she feels him slide something over her finger, and Avery, confused, paused to glance downwards to see the ring that gleamed there with a sudden stutter in her heart, looking at him and the hopeful expression on his face as if he wasn’t sure she’d say anything other than yes, eyes watering as she tried grasping for words, but could only manage a nod. And just like that, he had her swept up within her arms, Avery having a moment where she cried ugly against him, Mateo holding her so sweetly, whispering to her in Spanish as he soothed her through the emotions that drew jagged within her chest as she repeated her confirmation to him aloud, again and again, like a mantra. 

[demcnsinmymind]

birdonawiresara​:

Sara silently nodded, knowing that wasn’t the truth; if it was, he wouldn’t have been panicking and she wouldn’t have had to bring him up here in the first place. But at the same time, she understood the need to pretend otherwise. The need to never divulge a vulnerability, to never let anyone spot a weakness. It had been drilled into her by the League, and it wasn’t something that could easily be untaught. It was possible it could never be untaught. So she let it go, instead agreeing with a nod, “Me, too. I’ve traveled all over the world, experienced just about every kind of environment you can imagine, but nothing beats a good city and a good city view.” As for him relating to not liking to asking for help, but appreciating what she did anyway, she shrugged it off, “It’s not a big deal. Just a change of location, right? I say let the people down there have their cramped space, and their noise, and their overwhelming sights and smells. …I’ll take a nice quiet rooftop over that any day.”

Sara laughed lightly with him, “I guess that’s one way of looking at it, and it’s not completely wrong. It is a lot easier for me to help people solve their problems rather than dealing with my own.” It just usually involved more ass-kicking and less talking. “…But there’s more to it than that. For one, I know what it’s like to feel the way you felt. And like I said, a lot of times, I deal with it on my own, but… I’ve also had my dad’s hand. My sister’s. My best friend’s. You needed a hand, and I offered it.” She paused before adding, “Not to mention, I spent a lot of time… I wasn’t a good person. And while it’s hard to explain, it felt like there was a finality to that. That the bad I did would forever outweigh any good but… I got lucky.” To put it mildly. She’d been killed and then brought back from the dead, but given the circumstances she’d go with lucky. “I got a second chance at life, and I’m trying to - well I can’t undo what I did, but I can do better. I’m trying to be better. As for picking random people to talk to, I’d, uh…take baby steps. Do little things to help, work your way up if that’s what you want to do.”

“You and me both” Lance said, still smiling at her. Though truth be told, he’d really like to become his old self again one day. The one who used to enjoy mingling with the crowds from time to time. Having all eyes and ears on him without panicking, but enjoying it instead.

His face fell a little when she mentioned her dad, her family, because by god did he miss that, too. The times from many many years before. When his dad had still been alive. When they’d still had a connection. When he’d still allowed people to lend a hand. But that had been decades ago. Before the job. Before LA. Before his studies...before everything. Jesus, he couldn’t even tell anymore. When exactly it’d all gone wrong and he’d become the person he is today.

“You don’t have to explain. I know exactly what you mean. I feel the same way about it.”

He’d done his own share of very bad things in order to survive and save himself. One of the many reasons why he couldn’t look her in the eye anymore. And sure, he’d give anything in the world to undo it all. Or to outdo it all with something good. But in that regard, he thought just like her. Maybe even more extremely so. Some bad things should never be outweighed by any good. Some were just...too bad.

“I don’t know” he told her honestly, letting out a sigh, looking down at the streets below. “I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m trying. I really am. And I’m gonna keep trying and doing it. Truth be told though?” now, he was finally looking back at her. “Most of the time, it just makes me feel like a fucking hypocrite. I mean, it’s kinda selfish, isn’t it? Trying to earn some brownie points just to make myself feel better. Don’t know, kinda feels like it’s just making things worse.Besides. It’s not gonna bring back the dead anyway, is it now. So most of the time, I’m just thinking to myself ‘why bother?’” he added, laughing a little, though it sounded hollow. “Yet here I am, still doing it anyway. Just like you I suppose.”

[thegettingbyp2]

Congrats for the 100 followers! Can we have a Johnny knoxville x reader, a little angsty, in which they fight because after the last bull in jackass forever, the doctor told him to stop with big stunts but he continues to coming up with ideas? The reader is worried sick and eventually decided to leave him because of this behavior that's hurting her. But pls end it with a happy ending and a reconciliation ** your ff are my fave here on tumbrl**

Thank you!! That honestly means so much to me :') really hope you like this! I've never written Johnny upset so I liked the challenge and hopefully I've done it well!

No More Bulls

I knew that by dating Johnny Knoxville, I was signing up for constant worrying when he was filming Jackass, but I had never felt as much fear as I did when I saw him walk into that bullring.

‘Be careful,’ I said just before he entered the ring.

‘Always am darlin,’ he said, pressing a kiss to my forehead as he walked past, giving my hand a tight squeeze. I went to stand next to Steve-O, who as Johnny’s best friend, also became mine and I felt him wrap his arm around my shoulders to comfort me.

Everything seemed to go in slow motion when I saw the bull hit Johnny and he flipped in the air. When he hit the ground, I felt panic set in when I noticed that he wasn’t moving and he quickly disappeared from my sight as he was surrounded by paramedics. My first instinct was to run over to him to see if he was okay but I was quickly stopped when Steve-O’s arm wrapped around my waist, stopping me from going any further.

‘Steve-O, let me go,’ I said, voice shaking as I struggled in his grip, trying to get closer to Johnny.

‘(Y/N), just wait a second, let them get the bull away and then I’ll let you go okay?’ Steve-O said, used to having to talk me down when I stressed when Johnny was hurt. I felt my body still but my eyes didn’t leave the group of people surrounding my boyfriend. As soon as the bull was taken out of the ring, I felt Steve-O’s arm release my waist and I shot through the gate to Johnny’s side, sinking to my knees and grabbing his hand.

I heard a slight groan from Johnny’s throat as his eyes opened slowly. Tears fell from my eyes as I released the breath I didn’t know I had been holding. ‘Did we get the shot?’ he asked groggily making everyone around him laugh at his priorities.

‘We got it,’ Jeff said from behind me.

‘You okay doll,’ he asked, looking over at me as he was lifted off the ground in a stretcher and carried to the back of the ambulance. I climbed in straight after, still gripping his hand.

‘You really want an answer to that question?’ I asked sarcastically, ‘let’s just get you to the hospital,’ I said softly. He lifted my hand and kissed the back of my hand.

---

‘So I was thinking that next time I could have two bulls in there with me and if I can convince some of the other guys, we can do the Toro Totter again,’ Johnny said excitedly as he was jotting ideas for new stunts in his notebook. My head shot up as soon as I heard him mention bulls.

‘You really think it’s a good idea to get back in the bullring babe?’ I questioned, treading lightly around the subject. ‘I mean, you haven’t fully recovered from the last one yet.’

It had been the hardest hit he’d ever had from the bull and ended with him having to spend an entire weekend in the hospital. The injuries he sustained from it was a broken wrist, broken ribs, a concussion and a brain haemorrhage. The fact he wanted to carry on working with the bulls baffled me.

‘Well obviously not yet, darlin’, but when my wrists all healed up then I think it’d be great!’ He said, chuckling to himself. I sighed softly but not as quiet as I thought because Johnny looked up from his pad and asked what was wrong.

‘Nothing, it’s just you heard what the doctors said, they said no more big stunts,’

‘Babydoll, they say that every time I go,’ Johnny said, getting up from his seat and walking over to me, sitting on the coffee table opposite me and took my hand in his one good hand.

‘I know but this time was different. Baby, you’re not as young as you were ten years ago and I still fully support you doing these films because you love it and I’d never stop you from doing something you love but I can’t just sit by and watch you get seriously hurt because what if one of these times, the doctors can’t do anything to help you.’ I said all of this in one breath, needing to get it out, tears starting to spill from my eyes. I looked up to see Johnny staring at me.

‘Are you saying that if I carry on doing my big stunts, you’re gonna leave?’ He asked carefully, eyes trying to discern my answer from the look on my face. I looked down, squeezing his hand in mine as I worked up the courage to say what I needed to.

‘Johnny, I love you but I can’t keep panicking every time you go to work that you’re not going to come back, sitting by the phone worrying that I’m going to get a call from Jeff or Steve-O that something’s happened you’re not going to be able to come back from.’

There was a period of silence between us as we both sat staring at each other for a while before Johnny swallowed heavily and spoke, his words shattering my heart.

‘Sweetheart, I can’t just stop doing what I love.’

I nodded as more tears fell from my eyes, smiling softly before squeezing his hand once more and disentangling our fingers and standing up, wiping the tears off of my cheeks. ‘I’m really sorry, but I can’t do this anymore and there’s no way I’m going to ask you to choose between me and your job, I just can’t be around to see it anymore,’ I said quietly.

‘Sweetheart,’ Johnny started before cutting himself off, his voice thick and his eyes shining with unshed tears as he gripped at the hem of my shirt. I put one hand on the back of his head and other on his shoulder as I gently kissed the top of his head before pulling myself away. I looked at him and had to quickly look away so I didn’t start crying again. I squeezed his shoulder and let my hand gently cradle his cheek before walking away, not letting myself look behind me.

---

It had been two months since I had walked out on Johnny and every day I missed him so much my heart physically hurt, but at the same time, I knew that I had made the right decision with how much it was killing me seeing him getting so hurt all the time. I was renting a small apartment, not needing so spend extra money on a big place for just one person and I only left it when I needed to go out to buy groceries.

I hadn’t seen Johnny in the past two months but I had been keeping up to date on Instagram with how filming was getting on and I can’t lie, it worried be a bit that I hadn’t really seen any pictures or videos of Johnny on set. I kept having to remind myself that it was no longer any of my business what Johnny got up to.

It was a normal day, I was sitting on my sofa, covered with a blanket and watching my favourite TV show when I heard three loud knocks at my door. Confused because the only people who knew my new address were my parents and Steve-O (he came round when I first got the apartment to check that I was okay), I set my coffee on the small table, shook the blanket off my shoulders and made my way to the door. I couldn’t help the shape intake of breath when I saw Johnny in the doorway. He looked terrible, his eyes were dark as if he hadn’t slept in weeks and they we’re rimmed with red, a sign that he’d been crying.

‘No more bulls,’ he said quietly.

‘What?’

‘No more bulls,’ he repeated when I stepped aside to let him in. He walked into the apartment and turned to face me as soon as the door shut behind me. ‘Don’t be mad but I made Steve-O tell me where you were living.’

‘Okay? Johnny I,’

‘(Y/N), sweetheart, I’m a mess. I miss you, I haven’t been able to film anything because every time I did, I’d turn to find you and you weren’t there. It feels like there’s no point without you. I’m going to stop doing the stunts with bulls.’

‘Johnny, I told you I wasn’t going to ask you to,’

‘This isn’t me choosing between two things I love, (Y/N). This is me choosing between something I love and someone I can’t live without.’ He moved closer to me and took my hands in both of his, I looked down and noticed that the cast had come off his wrist, his thumbs rubbing soft circles on the insides of my wrists. ‘I’ve been miserable without you. I hate it. I found one of your books in my bedside drawer the other night and spent the night crying. Come back to me,’ his voice broke off slightly as tears formed in his eyes. I raised my hand and wiped the tear away, leaving my hand on his cheek when he leant further into my touch.

‘I miss you too. You have no idea the amount of times I’ve made two cups of coffee before I realised that you weren’t around anymore.’ Johnny laughed softly. ‘Are you sure that you’d be okay with giving up the bulls, you love them.’

‘I love you more.’ Johnny replied instantly. ‘Way more. I don’t care if I never even see a bull again. I’ve had this decided for weeks it’s just taken me this long to get your address from Steve-O, he was pissed at me when I told him what happened. I want you to come back. I want to wake up next you, I need to feel you laying on top of me again when you nod off sweetheart,’ he leant in closer so I could feel his breath on my lips. ‘Come back to me sweetheart.’

Without thinking, I wrapped my arms around his neck and stood on my toes to kiss him. His arms instantly wrapped around my waist and lifted me up. I pulled back and looked him in the eyes.

‘No more bulls?’

‘No more bulls sweetheart.’

[erimeows]

Who?

Might Guy considered himself a simple but talented man; a man of many feats who could do just about anything. He was a skilled fighter, in touch with his emotions, good at communicating, a compassionate friend and teacher, youthful, and an incredibly hard worker.

He could do a lot of things.

Romance was not one of those things.

So, despite his cheery demeanor, he was incredibly nervous as he sat right next to you, the beautiful Jonin he'd been in love with for the past decade. You, Guy, and a few others were in one of the local bars, all crammed into a circular booth. You were on one of the edges with Guy by your side, the two of you so close that your thighs were touching- not that Guy was bothered by it, of course, and you seemed not to mind it either.

There was you, him, Genma, Ebisu, Anko, Kotetsu, Izumo, and Shizune in that order on the large leather-clad seat, and the music that was blasting through the speakers was incredibly loud. Guy usually wasn't the type to become nervous in crowded settings, but as always, your presence managed to unsettle him in the worst (but also best) way possible.

That unsettled feeling in his gut was made worse when Genma, who was on his right, leaned over him a bit to talk to you, as you were on his left.

"Y'know, (y/n), you're pretty cute," Guy's heart dropped. He'd never spoken about his crush on you to anyone, but hearing his teammate hitting on you honestly made him feel... Challenged. He'd always tried to have a positive attitude about things, but something that he couldn't control were your feelings for him and other people. If you liked Genma, you liked Genma, and Guy could understand that; Genma was cool, funny, skilled, and conventionally attractive. Guy hadn't even made his intentions towards you well-known, so it'd be ridiculous to get upset over it, but there he was... Taking in a deep breath through his nose, Guy tensed and prepared himself to listen to the following exchange. "You should let me take you out on a date sometime."

"Ah, I appreciate that, Genma, but I've got my eyes set on someone else."

For a moment, Guy felt instant relief. It sucked to see his former teammate and one of his closest friends get rejected, sure, but if it meant that he wouldn't have to see the two of you flirting all the time and possibly even dating, he could live with it.

And then he felt panic. Someone else?

"You're dating someone?" He asked without much thought, shooting you a look of shock. "Since when?"

"Oh, no, I just have a bit of a..." You trailed off, nervously moving a hand to fix your (h/l) (h/c) hair. You'd always been gorgeous without even trying with that hair he wanted to touch and those (e/c) eyes he could stare into forever. You were in the standard Jonin vest with your headband hanging loosely around your neck, but you somehow managed to pull the look off better than everyone else in the village who had the exact same getup. "Crush."

"Who?" Guy asked, wanting to know who it was. Maybe he could out-romance them?

"Kakashi?" Ebisu guessed, tilting his head as he took another shot. Apparently, he'd had a hard time with Konohamaru that day. "I don't know why, but a lot of girls in the village seem to have a thing for him."

"I understand why!" Guy grinned, trying to act supportive and unbothered despite the fact that he was internally dying at the thought of you having a crush on his rival of all people. It'd be such a waste, too- If it weren't for those books he constantly read, Guy wouldn't have been sure that his rival could feel or understand anything romantic at all. Kakashi didn't even act like he liked you all that much. "He's strong, but silent and charming, and he's got quite the mysterious persona!"

"No, it's not Kakashi..." You laughed, finishing your (f/d) before placing a hand on Guy's shoulder. He blushed at the contact, but you were quickly pulling away and standing up. "Quite the opposite, really, but I should get going."

"(y/n)! I promise that one day, I'll guess who your crush is!" Guy challenged you, a large grin on his face, and oddly enough, you grinned back at him.

"Heh," You shook your head, giving the ravenette a look that he couldn't quite read. "I bet you won't anytime soon, but I'll let you keep guessing, Guy."

~

It was the next day, and as always, you and Guy were walking together.

You'd been good friends for the past fifteen years or so, having met when you transferred from The Sand Village to The Leaf Village as a Chunin due to some complicated family circumstances that you never really talked about. Many people had questioned how much of an asset you would be since you were from a village that they'd had problems with, but Guy and his friends had welcomed you with open arms, and you two had clicked almost instantly.

So, when he wasn't busy working with his students, the two of you tried to squeeze in a sparing session every day. You'd finished about a half-hour before, and though he'd initially claimed to be walking you home, you'd passed your house a good fifteen minutes ago and were now just walking aimlessly around the village together.

"So it's not Kakashi!" Guy spoke, bringing the two of you back to the subject of your crush yet again. He'd promised that he would guess who it was, and you'd agreed to tell him the truth if he got it right. He was determined, because no matter who it was, he would try to compete with them for your affections. It would be unyouthful to just roll over and die instead of trying his best to win your heart, after all! "Why is that?"

"He's a good friend, but a little quiet for my tastes and not emotionally available," As much as Guy loved his rival, that was true. "I like someone who can express themselves."

"Does that exclude Yamato from the choices, too?"

"Yes, for the same reasons but a little less severe," You chuckled, looking up at the sky, and Might took the opportunity to admire the smile he'd fallen in love with all those years ago. "I like his sense of humor, and again, good friend, but I'm not attracted to him romantically."

"Ebisu?"

He doubted it was actually Ebisu for... Reasons, but he wanted to get his teammates and the other people he was close to out of the way.

"Remember the expressing yourself thing? I don't mind dudes who are into weird shit, but he hides it and that's kind of a turn off," Of course, you were talking about how Ebisu read Jiraiya's books "in secret" but judged people who read them in public- the "in secret" only in quotations because literally everyone knew about it. "Screams repressed to me, so no, not Ebisu... Also, he's disrespectful towards a lot of the people I like."

"I guess it isn't Genma since you said no to his date proposal, right?"

"Right. He's pretty cool, but I'm not into him like that. He's more like a brother," With that, you looked at your wrist despite it not even having a watch on it. "Ah, would you look at the time? I've gotta get going. See you around, Guy."

With that, you were gone, and Guy was heading back home to go to the drawing board yet again.

Who could it be?

~

A few days later and Guy was popping in through the window of The Ninja Academy, a place where you'd occasionally volunteer your services. They were currently trying to implement lessons about Medical Ninjutsu, and you were one of the few kunoichi in the village who was talented at it, so you helped Iruka out with the occasional lesson. You were sitting alone in the classroom, packing your things- probably about to head home for the day.

You didn't look surprised to see him, only turning around with a small smile when you noticed him perched on the windowsill.

"I've returned to continue our challenge!"

"Oh?" You tilted your head, chuckling as you spun around in your roller chair. "Who are you guessing now?"

Guy stepped all the way into the classroom, sitting on top of the desk you were behind and crossing his arms as he mentally went through the list of names that he'd come up with over the past few days.

"Iruka-Sensei!"

"Good guess," You laughed, but shook your head and crossed your arms as well, propping your feet up on the desk. "He's very compassionate and hard-working, but to be honest, I see most of the Chunin as babies since I've been in charge of them so many times."

That was a good point. Though Iruka was only a few years younger than the two of you, it was more about the fact that you'd both been in charge of so many squads with him and other Chunin and Genin that the two seemed to blend into each other despite having a huge age-division between the groups with most Genin being preteens and young teenagers- on rare occasion, children- and most Chunin being late teenagers or adults. It would feel just as weird for you as it would for him to date someone who wasn't another Jonin or even a civilian that you could separate from work.

"Well, there goes my guesses for Izumo and Kotetsu..." Guy muttered, trying to think of other Jonin or even civilians that you interacted with regularly before remembering how often you went to Ichiraku. The owner was older than you, but you two seemed to be good friends at the very least, and he was running out of options. "Oh! Teuchi from Ichiraku? You two have always gotten along!"

"He's more like my dad, and I'm not sure if he's married or not," You rubbed the bridge of your nose between your thumb and pointer as you allowed your eyes to fall shut, the expression on your face screaming disappointed, but not surprised. "Also wouldn't want to make his daughter uncomfortable- I think I'm closer to her age than I am to his."

"Huh... I do know them, right?" Guy asked, feeling like he was running out of options.

Who the hell could it be?

"Rather well, actually, but I've gotta get going," You stood, pulling your bag over your shoulder and smiling before offering him a small wink. "Good luck next time."

~

Another day passed, and Guy was completely confused before another thought crossed his mind; he hadn't guessed any women yet. For all he knew, you could like Kurenai, Shizune, Anko, Tsunade- any of the girls in the village.

As luck had it, though, when he brought it up during one of your sparring sessions, he found out that he still didn't have the right answer.

"Is it a woman?" He asked at the same time he dodged a kunai you'd sent flying in his direction, quickly moving to the side when you appeared behind him without any warning and kicked him in the back before answering.

"No."

As a result of the sudden kick, he landed on the ground, barely able to catch himself with his hands before he raised a hand to gesture that the two of you pause. You seemed to understand and stopped in your motions completely, simply standing in front of him and waiting for him to speak. The ravenette sat up, still on the ground.

"Huh. I'm stumped! You might win this challenge..." Guy trailed off, raising a hand to run through his hair before tossing out one of the more unlikely guessed that had crossed his mind. "It's not Asuma?"

"Kurenai's one of my best friends. Of course it's not Asuma."

"Right, right..." He gave a dismissive wave, knowing that you liking Asuma would've been ridiculous, as he'd been dating Kurenai for years now. "Gosh! I have no idea who it could be!"

"I'll give you a hint; you've guessed just about everyone except who it actually is and the answer is right in front of you," With that, you turned around and waved back at him, a lop-sided smile taking over the lips he'd been wanting to kiss for so many years. "See ya."

~

Now, it had been a full week since Might Guy had started his journey to figure out who it was that you had a crush on. He was sitting in the bar again in the same booth he had been when the subject of your love-life had initially come up, but now, only two people were with him now; Genma to his right, and Ebisu to the brunette's right.

"I just have no idea who it could be!" Guy ranted, groaning as he stared up at the ceiling. "I've been guessing for the past week and none of my answers are right, but she said whoever it is has been right in front of me!"

"Who all have you guessed?" Ebisu questioned, seemingly annoyed by the subject.

"Both of you, Kakashi, Iruka, Kotetsu, Izumo- she said it wasn't a woman, so that's out of the question- Asuma despite him already dating Kurenai because who knows, Teuchi, and Yamato!"

Without any warning whatsoever, Genma slammed his head against the wood of the table so hard that the sound resonated through the room. He sat up a second later, looking surprisingly unphased despite the fact that the wood now had a very visible crack in it from the mere force he'd used.

"Genma-" Ebisu started, clearly panicked as he rested a shaky hand on Genma's back.

"Are you okay!?" Guy exclaimed, but Genma only glared at him.

"I love you to death, Guy, but you have the I.Q. of a fried goldfish."

"Hey! What's that for all of a sudden!?"

"Why do you think I asked (y/n) out?" Genma questioned, not giving Guy the chance to respond before slamming the rest of his shandy and leaning back in the booth.

"Because you like her?" Guy gave what he assumed was the obvious answer, only to earn a yell of frustration from the usually-calm Genma.

"No, you idiot- I'm gay! Literally as straight as your aim, which isn't very straight. I was trying to get both of you to realize that you like each other. It was a dumb idea, but I figured she'd admit that she has a crush on you, and now she's gone and made a game out of it. So, there's your answer. It's been you this whole time. Go talk to her before I slam my head against this table a few more times and give myself brain damage or something."

Guy nodded before standing up, mouth suddenly much drier than it was before. He reached into his pocket to leave money for the drink he'd only taken a few sips of, shakily leaving it on the table before running out of the bar, knowing exactly where to find you at this time of night.

~

When he landed on the roof of your apartment, Guy was relieved to see that you were sitting there like you usually were on nights like this.

"(y/n)!"

Taking in a deep breath and offering the typical grin and thumbs up that always seemed to make you chuckle, he sat down next to you, looking up at the sky instead of meeting your gaze.

"Oh, Guy," You smiled at him, and he wondered if what Genma had said was really true. If someone as beautiful as you were really in love with him, he was one lucky bastard. "You have more guesses for me?"

"It's me, right?"

"So you finally figured it out," You allowed your eyes to fall shut, bringing your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around them as your smile fell. "Took you long enough, but I guess it doesn't matter since you don't really return the feelings."

"Who said I didn't return your feelings?" Guy asked, moving to place a reassuring hand on your shoulder as he frowned. Sure, he hadn't openly expressed it, but he'd assumed that it was somewhat obvious. Plus, you could have anyone you wanted- how could you not think that he'd like you?

"You took forever to guess," You explained, looking off to the side and trying to suppress the obvious frown that was threatening to take over your face. "So I just assumed that you were repulsed by the thought."

Not even thinking about it, the ravenette grabbed both of your hands, holding them in his much larger ones and intertwining your fingers.

"Let me prove you wrong, then!"

"And how do you plan on doing that?"

"Like this, if it's okay..." Guy whispered, leaning in until his lips brushed against yours. Your eyes fell shut, and you were wrapping your arms around his neck, so he assumed that was a 'yes' and went for it. His lips were pressed against yours in seconds, all of the tension that'd been building between the two of you since you'd met suddenly released within the span of a few seconds. You were perfect, soft lips moving against his much rougher ones in a passionate yet languid manner. He would've stayed there and relished in the feeling forever, but unfortunately, you both needed oxygen.

"Oh my God," You whispered back, gently reaching up and running your fingers through the ends of his silky hair as you broke the kiss. "I love you."

"I love you, too! How about a date?"

"Right now?" You questioned, tilting your head.

"If you're up for it, yes!"

"I guess it's your reward for winning the challenge, right?" You asked, giggling as you stood and pulled him up along with you. "C'mon."

[wvsteria]

misteriios​:

“yep, it’s whatever. he wasn’t ready to have a kid is my wild guess. was just thrown into it without wanting to and didn’t care much to make it better. i can’t help to feel a little pity for him“ he shouldn’t. why care about someone who doesn’t give a shit about you? it’s waste of energy “thanks” was all he could answer. he was glad his life wasn’t all sad. having friends who supported each other was the best “neither did i. i am thinking sometimes if it’d be different if she was still there. don’t you sometimes wish your parents were? or saw that it doesn’t matter where someone comes from? or were they afraid we were a bad influence on you? i understand i was, but john b and pope weren’t, maybe john b sometimes, not pope” why couldn’t they get along, all of them. money wasn’t everything and yet many in outer banks thought it was. life was about to have fun with the people you loved to be around. his motto was if you want something, take it, or these things you could take “you are too kind, you know that?” but it was good one of them were “i know, perhaps it is what formed me into the person i am” jj shrugged. knowing very well how right she was. damn, again she was good to find the right words to say. every time she said such smart things, he couldn’t stop wondering why she was his friend. he nodded his head to what she said “okay, i admit you are right. of course, you are the only family i have and had. friends are meant to be there for each other, right?” he bit on the inside of his cheek when kie mentioned her fake memories “sucks it happened to you. i bet you were still the same old kie as you were back home when you was a kid” maybe, what did he know about it?

“well if he ever shows his face around here, he’s getting a swift punch to the face again.” kiara hoped honestly that luke wouldn’t show up. jj deserved this chance to be happy and not have that guy looming over his life. “i do sometimes wish my parents were here.” kiara had such a complicated relationship with her parents. she loved them with all her heart, but the way they saw the world was just entirely different than her. who she spent her time with. none of that status or class stuff mattered and she hated that they thought it did. she’d never stop hanging out with her friends ever again. she’d already gone that year at the kook academy and it was the worst year of her life. “i guess they have some twisted idea that i’d get stuck in the cut or something.” she shrugged her shoulders. she didn’t get it. but at the same time she saw how happy they were when she had left the house. she was convinced they didn’t want her around anymore. “but it doesn’t really matter what i want.” kie said with a shrug. “they’re probably much happier without me around honestly.” the compliment from jj brought a smile to her face. she turned her head to try and hide it form him a bit. “oh shut up.” she said while nudging his side. “but you know i’m always right.” she teased with a smile, “friends and family forever and always, jj. literally nothing could ever break that up.” 

[midgardianweasley]

I‘d love to see you write an angsty fanfic with Natasha x reader (male or female is up to you) with a bad ending of your choice.

No pressure of course ✨

as requested Violet!! I hope it's okay<3

How could you do this to me?

Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary: Natasha hasn’t been around recently and Y/N’s been really missing her company, but that changes when some CCTV footage is discovered.

Warnings: Cheating, swearing.

Word Count: 3.6k

there was an attempted proof read, but sorry in advance if i've missed anything!!

message/ask to be added to the taglist<3

Requests are open!

You weren’t surprised when you woke up to an empty bed once again, the space beside you missing a red-head assassin. You’d grown used to the sight of bedsheets spread lazily on your side of the bed, almost completely thrown off of the edge. It wasn’t unusual, however, the feeling of disappointment that lingered in your chest every morning never eased with time.

‘I’m just off to train, baby.’

‘I need to go and see Fury about this next mission, you go back to sleep’

‘I forgot to debrief the team last night, so we need to have a meeting this morning instead.’

‘Off to get some breakfast, my love. I’ll save you some eggs.’

Those were the typical reasons you received whenever you questioned where she was going in such a hurry in the mornings. You knew she was busy, of course you did. But, you missed the mornings when she’d pull you back into her chest, refusing to let you leave until you gave her a few kisses, which never ended up just being kisses, but you always gave in either way.

Now that you think of it, you can’t remember the last time she held you. Not properly. She used to hold you in a death grip, so tight that you could almost feel her heartbeat in your own chest. Nowadays, you were lucky to get more than a few taps on the back, it felt like you were being congratulated for something.

You’d always brushed it off, thinking that you must’ve been selfish for wanting so much of her attention, you had to be more understanding of how demanding her job is. It wasn’t like you never tried, you did, everyday. It would just be nice to feel her love for you a little more, even if it was just a quick peck before she left in the mornings.

“Hey Wan’, Hey Vis” You smiled at the pair as they stood at the kitchen counter, cracking eggs and buttering some toast. They loved cooking together, Wanda always told you how cute it was when Vision was trying to learn, especially after his fiasco with the Paprika.

“Hi Y/N, want something to eat?” Wanda handed you some toast, which you took gratefully, slowly munching on it.

Vision looked up as though to engage in conversation, when he then looked around in confusion. “Where’s Ms. Romanoff?”. You shrugged.

“I’m not sure, I think she’s training, I’ve not heard from her yet.”

You were looking at Vision, but it was near impossible to miss the sympathetic look Wanda was giving you. She knew about how you’d been feeling with Natasha not being around so much, she had tried to help, to hint to Nat that you’d been feeling a bit neglected for a while now, but she hadn’t gotten very far.

“Nat, nat, I just think that maybe you should spend a little more time with Y/N” It was obvious the assassin wasn’t listening to her, shrugging it off and trying to walk past the witch, only to have a hand pressed on her chest to push her backwards.

“Wanda, I need to go, I'm running late.”

“you’re always running somewhere. I'm sure Fury, or Tony or whoever you’re in such a rush to see, can wait. You haven’t seen your girlfriend in forever.”

“I saw her last night.”

“Crawling into bed in the early hours of the morning and sleeping next to her, isn’t seeing her, Nat.”

Her words fell on deaf ears as she watched her friend turn around and walk the other way. She could’ve used her powers to stop her, she didn’t see a point though. She wasn’t listening, and she couldn’t force her to.

“It's fine though, honestly! I can hang out with you guys today if you’re not busy?”

the couple shared a look of awkwardness before looking back towards you.

“Actually, we were going to go into town and do some sightseeing. You’re welcome to join us though!” She smiled, not wanting you to be alone, which you were grateful for, but you couldn’t intrude.

“No no, don’t worry! I think I've got something Tony wanted me to check out in the Lab, now that I think about it.” You didn’t. “You guys have fun though! take pictures!” You winked, knowing full well that your best friend didn’t believe you, she hesitated before nodding her head in agreement and beginning to walk off with Vision in tow.

__________________

An hour or so went by, you still hadn’t seen Natasha at all, or anyone, really. They all seemed to have disappeared to do their own thing, leaving you to find yours. So, you found yourself wandering into your lab, where you found Tony observing the screens with an endless amount of data changing every couple of seconds. You never really understood how he made sense of it all so quickly, but you’d always been intrigued nonetheless.

He must’ve sensed someone was there, as he broke away from his train of thought and glanced over towards you, fully acknowledging how your shoulders were slumped and your eyes lacked your usual sparkle. Tony alway had a soft spot for you, he’d known you for years, taking on a role similar to a father’s. Seeing you look so defeated recently, it’d hurt him a little more than he cared to admit.

Gesturing for you to come in with a gentle smile before moving and adjusting various chunks of metal on the table in the centre of the lab.

“Ah ah!” He tapped the bridge of his nose

“You can’t be serious! Tony I-”

“Nope”

“I’m a grown woman!” You laughed in disbelief at his

“Yes, you are, and I do not plan on taking said grown woman to medical because she got a shot of electricity through her eyeball. Put them on.”

You rolled your eyes, picking up a pair of the obnoxiously large lab goggles and put them over your face. He really took being a ‘father figure’ too seriously sometimes. With your goggles on, you took yourself over to where he stood, hoping to help him out somehow and keep yourself occupied.

You watched him move around blueprints on the screen above. “So, whatcha working on?”

“Well, remember that last mission we went on? How that ended?”

“Well, considering I had to get bullets removed for the last two hours, I’d say I remember pretty well.”

His face cringed slightly “Yeah, that’s the one. I’m basically just trying to layer the suits more, but keep the weight to a minimum so that there’s more protection, but the speed and mobility is almost, if not, the same.” He pondered, mind wandering off again to try and figure out how he could make this work.

Suddenly springing to action, he started assembling some pieces together, chucking some aside and reaching for different tools he required.

Looking towards you, he tilted his head “Can you pass me the-”

His sentence was interrupted. “Hey Tony, hey-” Banner. You didn’t mind Bruce, he was always quite quiet and polite most of the time, a little awkward, but, when you have a literal Hulk inside of you, it’s probably the least of your concerns.

You waved at the Avenger. “Hi Bruce” You gave him a friendly smile, for it to be returned with an awkward gaze, which he tried to quickly shove off.

“Yeah, uh, hi, Y/N. W-what brings you here?”

“Oh, no particular reason, I wanted something to do so I thought I'd come down, just pay a visit.” He nodded, acknowledging your words but appearing a little on edge, almost.

“Hey, you okay?” You asked “You look a little pale?”

“Yeah, yeah n-no I'm fine, just a-a bit tired.” He stuttered before suddenly directing his attention towards the man standing beside you. “How’s it coming along, Ton’?”

“Not bad, I have a wonderful assistant to help me out.” he nudged you playfully.

“Haha, yeah. She’s great. Anyways, you seem to have a good hold on things, so, I’ll leave you to it and come back later.”

Neither of you had managed to get a word out before Banner had walked out and was already out of sight. You turned to face Tony again.

“Was that- did you find that weird at all?”

“I find most of the people in this compound weird.”

It was a serious question, but you couldn’t help but let out a laugh at the millionaire’s response.

“I do pride myself on it.”

“As you should. You’re the weirdest one.”

“Hey!” You slapped his arm. “Rude!”

“I’m kidding! Now, pass me that screwdriver, goggles.”

Chuckling, you threw him the screwdriver and zoned out thinking about Bruce’s weird behaviour. While Tony was right, the majority of us are weird. You couldn’t stop thinking about how unusual it was, even for him. You put it to the back of your mind though, focusing back on what the man beside you was working on. You’re sure it’s fine.

________________________

You thought you were going crazy. First you had Nat, who was disappearing every chance she got, Then you had Bruce who couldn’t look you in the eye and when you finally believed it couldn’t get any weirder, you picked up on some strange vibes from Steve.

“Oh finally! I was beginning to think no one else actually lives here.” You approached Steve who seemed to be walking and talking with Bruce, both taking a step back when they looked towards you.

“Hey Y/N, we were just-”

“We were just about to go and have a shower. Training.” Steve cut in, earning himself a glare and a shake of the head from the scientist beside him, subtle, so you hadn’t noticed, otherwise you would’ve questioned it.

“Oh? You were training too, Bruce?”

“Well, I-” He glanced at Steve. “Yeah. Yeah, I, uh, wanted to get some combat down, just in case I needed it.”

“Considering our last mission, I think we all should.” the super soldier quickly added, sending you an enthusiastic smile, which you had returned. You went to speak again, possibly inquiring as to whether or not they knew where your girlfriend was, but you hadn't had the chance as the pair of them quickly rushed off, muttering something about catching you later, leaving you on your own, once again.

What the hell was going on?

_____________________

Feeling defeated, you trudged your way into your bedroom, just wanting to shower, get into bed and sleep, and hope for some form of normality.

What you hadn’t expected, was to walk in and see the back of a familiar figure sporting the black suit she practically lived in, tying her hair into a low bun and beginning to change into some more comfortable clothes.

You were dating, so it wasn’t new to see Nat changing, but you still thought it would be decent to make her aware of your presence. The small “ahem” was enough to make her spin round and flash you a smile, her pearly white teeth on show.

“Hi babe, i’m just changing for bed. You okay?”

The words felt so unfamiliar to you, having not heard them in what felt like forever. Still, you decided to humour it.

“Yeah, yeah I'm okay. A bit of a weird day is all.”

She laughed, returning to laying out her clothes. “Well, we are surrounded by some weird people.”

“That’s what Tony said.”

There was an atmosphere in the air that you couldn’t quite pinpoint. It had always felt comfortable with Natasha, you would describe her company as being like a safety blanket, enveloping you with warmth and a sense of security. This felt different. It didn’t feel familiar anymore, it was like you were face to face with a stranger and the more you looked at her, the more it upset you.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” Natasha put her palms on your cheeks, bringing your Y/E/C eyes to meet her emerald ones in the process. You hadn’t realised that tears had fallen until the pad of her thumbs gently brushed them away.

“I just, it sounds so stupid.”

“Tell me.”

You let out a sigh, eyes beginning to dart around the room. “It just feels like I’ve never seen you, I don’t remember the last time we’ve spoken and it’s, it’s been lonely.” Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion at your response, lips falling into a frown, but you were quick to speak again.

“It hasn’t just been you though, I understand that work gets in the way, but, it felt like some members of the team were acting differently around me.”

“Really? Like who?”

“Well, I mean, Bruce could barely bring himself to say anything more than a sentence to me and I tried to speak to Steve just before I came here and he rushed off like his life depended on it. I don’t know, maybe I’m just being a bit paranoid.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing, Detka, I wouldn’t worry about it.” She whispered, hands pulling you forward with ease to bring your lips together. You smiled at the contact, you’d missed it.

You were so caught up in it, that you hadn’t noticed you were the only one smiling.

It wasn’t long before the both of you were interrupted by an electronic voice in the room.

“Miss Romanoff, Miss Y/L/N.” It was F.R.I.D.A.Y. “Mr Stark is asking for you both in the conference room.”

“Alright, thanks F.R.I.D.A.Y., we’re on our way.” Your girlfriend replied, rushing away from the kiss and leading you to the door.

Why was everyone in such a rush today?

_______________________

“So, I was messing around with some things in the lab, and I think I've found a solution to our suit issue. It’s still a work in progress because I'll need to tweak some things and then tailor them blah blah blah, but I thought I'd show you guys the latest. JARVIS?”

“Bringing up footage 182.”

While you waited for the video to be up and running, you took note of everyone sitting around you. For the most part, they looked tired, though you don’t blame them, it was pretty late.

Shuffling to your left, you held Natasha’s hand in yours, sending her a loving gaze before resting your head on her shoulder, just content that she was close by. She sat a little straighter at the action, careful not to push you off of her, but not entirely relaxing either.

The large tv screen lit up, a view from the corner of the lab came into sight where you could see Tony installing different wires and pieces of loose metal into the suit, watching it light up as he did so. He was in the middle of explaining what he was doing as the recording went on, when the screen suddenly turned to static, black and white lines taking over the screen.

“JARVIS?”

“Minor technical issue, working on it, Mr Stark.”

You caught Wanda’s eye across the table, a playful smirk plastered onto her face at the mishap, watching the billionaire get stressed over a television. You couldn’t help but laugh at the words flying from his mouth as he started hitting the remote, as if he was someone who didn’t understand technology.

It wasn’t long before an image appeared back on the screen, however, this wasn’t the same recording. This is from the gym. It focused on one of the square mats in the middle of the room where two people were sparring. One of which, you immediately recognised as Natasha.

The other person definitely wasn’t a girl, their hair was short and muscles so big you were worried that one slice would be the end. It zoomed in a little, and from the blonde hair and dark blue outfit, you pieced together who it was.

“Oooh, Black Widow and the SuperSoldier, one vs one. Now this should be interesting.” A previously tired looking Sam clapped his hands and leaned forward, now fully invested in the scene in front of him.

You turned to Nat, who now looked a little paler than she did before.

“You look like you’ve just seen a ghost, don’t tell me, you lost this spar?” You joked, expecting her to join in and tease you back. Instead, her face displayed an emotion you weren’t entirely sure of.

Before you could question it, you noticed the room fall silent. Not even a breath could be heard in the room. Your head turned slowly, meeting a mixture of shocked and sympathetic faces. And that was when you saw it.

Nat had kissed Steve, and he didn’t stop her.

If you weren't aware of your heartbeat before, you couldn’t be now, for it felt like it had completely stopped. Your jaw fell as your eyes filled with tears, only worsening the longer you saw the two of them on the screen. It was only turned off when a third person walked into view, not needing to ponder on who it could be, you immediately faced guilty stares. Three of them.

“You- you kissed-” You stuttered, incapable of forming a sentence towards your teammate. “And, you knew?” Your voice broke, tears now beginning to find their way down your cheeks for the second time as Bruce couldn’t bring himself to answer you.

You swiftly rose out of your seat, attempting to keep yourself composed until you could be alone.

“Baby-” Natasha murmured, trying to take hold of your hand, which you snatched back before she could lay a finger on it.

“Don’t.”

“Please-”

“Leave me alone.” You spat, speed walking out of what now felt like an overcrowded room.

You didn’t hear it, you’d left too early, but if you had stayed, you would’ve heard the team give Nat and Steve the scolding of their lives, mainly from Wanda and Tony, telling them how disappointed they were in them both. How they’d be lucky if you were to forgive them for what they did.

________________________

You don’t know how long you’d been sitting on your shared bed for. It could’ve been an hour, it could’ve been a couple of minutes. All you knew, was that you couldn’t stay in this room much longer, looking at the picture frames and the shared wardrobe, it just felt painful.

So, you walked over to your wardrobe and gathered every item of your clothing into your arms, lacking any care for if there were hangers or labels in the way, and chucked them on the bed and started to chuck it all into a suitcase intended for holidays but, you don’t see that happening anytime soon.

The sound of sniffles and rustling was all you could hear in the room, so much so that it was suffocating, and it didn’t help when you heard the door creak open.

“What are you doing?” A voice squeaked. Natasha stood beside the door, fidgeting with her fingers as she anxiously bounced from one foot to the other. You didn’t even bother to look up in her direction, focusing solely on getting out of there as soon as you could.

“Baby, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what happened, I didn’t mean it.” You scoffed at her attempt at an explanation. “I love you.”

That’s what made you whip your head to see her red and puffy eyes, if this was any other situation, you would’ve rushed over and engulfed her in a hug, tell her that everything would be okay and you’re there for her. Now? All you felt was anger.

“If you loved me, you wouldn’t have kissed him.”

“I didn’t know-”

You stood up straight, almost laughing at her choice of words. “You didn’t know? Bullshit. I’m pretty fucking sure everyone is aware when they kiss someone. Did you know when you were kissing me then? Or did you not know that either?”

“I wasn’t thinking.”

“I don’t think I care.”

She tries to step closer to you, only for you to take one back, holding your hand out, indicating for her to stop.

“No. no, you know what Nat, you don’t get to do this. You don’t get to treat me like a stranger for weeks, like I'm sharing a bed with someone I don’t know, for you to then kiss someone else and expect me to forgive you. You have no idea how I've felt these past weeks, blaming myself and thinking I was selfish for wanting your time. It’s funny, really.”

She looked away from you, regret taking over her features, both of you now having tear stains covering your rosy red cheeks.

You broke the silence once again. “Was that the first time?”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“Y/N-” She pleaded

“Answer the question, Natasha.” You spoke through gritted teeth.

Silence returned to the four walls.

“Get out.”

“No, no, we-” She stepped forward, only to halt herself when she realised what she was doing.

“There is no ‘we’. We’re done. I’ll have my stuff moved back into my room by tonight, though I'm sure it won’t make much of a difference to you.”

“I’m really sorry.”

“Whatever.”

She walked out of the room, hesitating slightly, wondering if it’s worth staying and trying to figure out whatever this is. She shook her head to herself, knowing she’d fucked up. There wasn’t a fight anymore. It was done.

Collapsing on the bed, the feeling washed over you again as the finality of it all set in. You didn’t stop though. You packed your clothes, your perfumes, all of your loose hair ties and left the room with only one thought on your mind.

Natasha won’t even notice the difference.

Taglist: @natashas-favourite-knives @wandaromanova

[yeonjunszn]

— 𝐞𝐧𝐡𝐲𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐬 ♡

pairing: ot7 x f!reader

genre: absolute fluff

warnings: mature language, jay’s has a minuscular amount of angst

— hey hi hello! my first actual post on this blog 🙀 i hope you enjoy bc me and my best friend literally make up hcs on the DAILY LMFAOO the plan is to turn these all into drabbles or fics hopefully, but most likely with different plots than the actual hcs under the cut.

—beta read by my 4ever partner in crime kaz <3

lee heeseung & sharing a bed ♡

✩ the way it happens is a cute story, honestly. since the group is an uneven number of members, they asked you, a dear friend from the staff, if you’d like to go on a trip with them. you were the closest to their age, only a year or two older than heeseung, so you agree. it’d be best if they had some professional supervision anyways. they behaved like teenage boys still.

✩ when you arrived at the house they rented, the younger boys immediately sprinted to pick out rooms. jake and sunghoon decided to room together, obviously. which resulted in jungwon and jay, then ni-ki and sunoo. this left you with heeseung, who you’d always thought was attractive. but of course, since the others had already started fighting over rooms, hee suggests settling with rock paper scissors. and everyone knows the person who brings it up always loses. so the two of you end up with the smallest room— which happens to only have one bed.

park jay & brother’s best friend ♡

✩ jay is the type of person who doesn’t have many friends, but has a few very good ones, the ones that he knows he’ll be able to trust for the rest of his life. those people are his group members and the only friend of his who stuck by his side after he became an idol. he met your brother at the end of middle school and they became extremely close from how much they related to one another. they always hung out after school, did all the usual teenage stuff.

✩ your brother introduced you to jay that same summer, right before high school started for them. you were only a year younger, so you figured you’d get along well with him too. except you got along a little too well. you both realized how far you’d fallen when it too late. jay felt horrible for telling you about leaving for idol training before telling your brother, his best friend, but he didn’t want to break your heart. he wanted to try and give you enough time to get over him so that way you’d be okay when he left. you didn’t have the heart to tell him you couldn’t, especially because he took it right with him the day he set off to follow his dreams. and you didn’t know he left his behind, right in the palm of your hand.

sim jake & childhood bffs to lovers ♡

✩ to me, this is the only trope that fits jake. he wants to fall in love with someone he trusts and cares for on an unparalleled level, and that can only be achieved with his forever best friend. when he realizes what his true feelings are, he thinks he’s lost his damn mind, because what! he sees you as more than just a friend??

✩ you’re the one who cleaned his scrapes after he fell while playing soccer. you held his hand when his mom dragged him to doctors appointments for shots. you fixed his tie for every single formal dance you attended together. you were his number one supporter throughout his short idol training. you cheered for him back home during his time on i-land. you texted him every single day leading up to enhypen’s debut. you were the only one who believed in him when he felt the world was against him. so he wonders to himself why he freaked out so much. you’re quite literally the only person he could ever want a future with anyway.

park sunghoon & ex lovers to lovers ♡

✩ when the relationship ended, it was very mutual. he was leaving to pursue his dreams of becoming an idol and didn’t want you to wait around for him. he didn’t see you as an obstacle or anything, god no, you were his number one fan. he just knew that he’d be away for a really long time and didn’t want you to have to deal with the stress of a long distance relationship. so you both decided to break things off and that was that.

✩ after the debut, you were the first person he texted. he’d felt so homesick and he remembered how much warmth coursed through his body whenever he was with you. he tried to pass it off as familiarity, because it’d been months since the two of you had last spoken, but the longer he received another message back from you, the deeper he got reeled in. he never fully moved on, however, he never really wanted to in the first place. you reminded him of things that made him feel safe. you kept out the cold in the winter and the heat in the summer. you’d always be his home away from home— no matter how far apart you were.

kim sunoo & fake lovers to lovers ♡

✩ sunoo pretends to be your boyfriend only because you asked him so nicely and offered him compensation in return for his services. this guy wouldn’t leave you alone and you figured if you had someone on your arm, he’d stop pestering you. the reason you asked sunoo? you already had a teensy crush on him.

✩ it was hard not to grovel at kim sunoo’s feet. while he had a flair for the dramatics, he was one of the brightest human beings to walk the face of the earth. his aura constantly radiated comfort and shone like the sun. it was a miracle that he happened to be in your class. once the two of you started spending more time together to make your relationship more “authentic”, you began to see all the different sides of him that no one else saw. you found yourself falling more and more each day. and of course it was only fair that he did the same.

yang jungwon & the coffee shop au ♡

✩ as the leader of an idol group, yang jungwon is not unwelcome to stress. in fact, it’s the very thing that nearly forces him to pull at the hair on his head. no less being the youngest leader amongst all the current kpop groups. having to keep his group members in check is no doubt a headache, especially with ni-ki the gremlin around. finding a small escape of sorts is sometimes his key to tranquility, and that small escape became coffee.

✩ he learns that he thinks clearer when he gets some fresh air and steps outside, away from all his worries, so he began to frequent a quaint little cafè located less than half an hour walk from the dorms. the atmosphere and the aesthetics calm him every single time, various shades of browns and beiges invading his eyesight as the scent of coffee beans waft through the space surrounding him. no one recognizes him either, with the dark sunglasses perched on the bridge of his nose and the hat on his head concealing his face. another plus? the cute part-time barista who happens to be his age and doesn’t have a clue as to who enhypen or yang jungwon are.

nishimura riki & enemies to lovers ♡

✩ ni-ki is fucking competitive. there’s no doubt in my mind that a day doesn’t go by where he’s not conjuring up new ways to better himself. and as much as you hate to admit it, he’s a really good dancer. it’s not surprising, seeing as he’s been doing this since he was a small child. he’s only gotten stronger with his skills as he’s grown older, and even now he’s only in his late teens, so he hasn’t even reached his prime yet. imagine how frustrating it is to hear that someone is trying to claim his title as ‘best dancer’ in school, especially when he’s worked so hard to earn it.

✩ it’s actually kinda silly because you aren’t trying to steal his thunder purposefully, you just happen to be very successful at doing so and it irritates him to no end. how can you even live with yourself for soaking up all this attention without remorse? how can you let all these other guys fawn over you and your near-flawless technique? the worse part of it all is the fact that he knows he’d do the same if he wasn’t so hellbent on upholding this rivalry with you. and he hates the churning feeling in his stomach he gets from watching you get giddy over executing several fouettés in a row. he hates you. but maybe just maybe, he kinda sorta likes you, too.

© yeonjunszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.

[mountswhore]

𝐛𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 — marcus rashford

summary: marcus broke up with you months ago, claiming you were his biggest distraction. but he just can’t escape you.

notes: requests are open, ask away.

“I shouldn’t still be in love with you.”

for my love, @diorfairy777

“Why are you being so off, love?” You asked Marcus, who’d just walked in from training. You were cooking dinner for him, as you were only staying at his house for a few nights. But the moment Marcus walked in, he was a completely different person. No kiss to greet you, no questions about your day or retelling of his, no wandering hands. He was completely shut off.

Taking it as him being tired, you just sighed and returned to cooking. But he sat at the island, staring at you, almost as if he were waiting for you to turn around. So you did, meeting his eyes that almost spilled over with nerves. He didn’t want to do this to you, he wanted you to stay here with him forever. But it’s for his career.

“I think we should break up.”

The words felt like bullet holes in your chest, the air leaving your lungs and not returning. You could barely hear the pan sizzling over your thoughts. Marcus refused to look at you, he didn’t want this to be worse than it was. He thought that if he did it without looking into your gorgeous eyes again, it would be okay.

“Why?” You mumbled, barely any sound coming from you.

“You’re my biggest distraction. Even the boys think my games off, and I need to get back out there. I need to be the best I can be, and I can’t do that with you.” He explained. You wished he didn’t have a way with words, he made it sound so okay. But you didn’t want to leave him. You loved him.

“So you’re throwing away three years of us, just so you can be better at football?” You questioned. He just nodded, stop avoiding your eyes. You felt suddenly out of place, like you shouldn’t be standing here anymore. You turned the oven off, silently going to grab your things, and left. Without another word.

Marcus watched as you left the driveway, tears burning his waterline. Why did he have to do this to you?

It had been three months since breaking up with you, and Marcus couldn’t escape you. His friends would bring you up, because you were still mates with them, his family would ask about you, he’d see that stupid bakery you loved every morning on his drive to work, he’d see your favourite flowers in a shop window, he’d see your car model and almost have a heart attack. You were everywhere, and it was proving difficult to get over you.

But for you it was vastly different. The only time you saw or heard of Marcus was in your family’s presence, watching the football. It was safe to say you were getting over him, at least you thought you were. You still spoke to Jesse, Paul, Jadon, and some other United boys, and they knew not to speak of Marcus. They obviously wanted you back together, because Marcus just wasn’t the same, they just didn’t know how.

“And what do you suggest we do, dickhead?” Jesse asked Jadon, as they sat together by the water bottles at training. Putting these two brains together to form a plan wouldn’t be a good idea.

“Have a party, a house party, and invite the pair,” Jadon mentioned, throwing his bottle to the side of him. “Tell Y/N that we don’t know if Marcus will show up, and Marcus won’t expect her to show up either.” Jesse couldn’t believe he was even considering it, but he nodded anyway.

Hey, Y/N. I’m having a party this weekend, if you wanted to come. It’d be lovely to see you, Jesse texted you. Sitting by his phone anxiously for your reply, he sighed deeply.

I don’t think that would be a good idea. I don’t want to make your best mates feel awkward, you replied. Jesse knew you were talking about Marcus, and his heart melted at your compassion, but he was adamant on you coming.

I doubt he will even come, he’s been so focused on football, Jesse texted back.

Fine. See you Saturday, J Lingz, you responded, finally dropping your phone in defeat. It would be lovely to see the boys again, but did you want to risk running into Marcus again? Your heart still clenched every time you saw him playing.

“Fuck it.” You mumbled to yourself, grabbing your purse and shoes, running out to your car. You wanted to find a nice outfit, and get yourself dressed up to enjoy yourself, whether Marcus was there or not.

Saturday had arrived, and you were sitting on your couch, waiting for Jesse to pick you up. He said you could stay the night, because there was a 99% chance you’d be drinking. The dress was short, tight, completely unlike you. You were feeling more and more self conscious, and were in the right mind to cancel on Jesse.

But the moment he arrived and opened your door to see you, you felt okay again. Jesse was your personal hype man, always making you feel better about yourself.

“Ooh, look at you. You look gorgeous.” Jesse hummed in appreciation, holding you tight to his chest. It felt good to see him again, to hug him again, losing Marcus meant you lost Jesse. Sure, you still spoke to him. But there was always a tension.

“Thanks, Jess.” You replied, pulling away from him, “now let’s get fucked up.”

Jesse had taken you back to his, the house crawling with other footballers, girlfriends of those footballers, and some other friends. As much as you hated big parties, it made it easier to avoid Marcus if he did turn up. Jesse still had a tight hold on your hand, leading you through crowds of people, to the kitchen with the drinks.

“Y/N!” Jadon cheered, pulling you into him. You smiled and returned the embrace. Jesse had handed you a drink, and you quickly downed it. “I’m gonna make the rounds, Y/N, have fun.”

You were left by yourself, which was fine, because it gave you time to see the footballers you hadn’t seen in a while. Some of the England squad was here, so you spent most of your time talking to them. The music was very loud, you could barely hear the others surrounding you, but you almost choked on your drink when you heard someone shout, ‘Rashy’.

Your head darted in the direction of the front door, and there he was. Still as gorgeous as ever, now sporting frosted tips. His smile still shone brightly in the dark lighting of Jesse’s house, but something was different. You finished your drink, promising Mason and Declan you’d get back to them, before quickly pouring yourself another.

“Y/N’s getting a drink, quickly take Rashy to get one.” Jesse instructed Jadon, pushing him and disappearing within the bodies of people. Jadon sighed and greeted his friend, practically dragging him to the island that held the drinks.

That was when he saw you.

For the first time in months.

The one place he thought he was free from everything that reminded him of you.

“What are you doing here?” Marcus asked, the question sounding more rude than he had anticipated, but still you turned around with a smile. A false one, that even he could see was put on. Jadon had quickly slipped out of the situation, watching from afar as the pair of you spoke.

“Jesse invited me, well, begged me to come.” You stated, mixing a few drinks together and quickly letting it hit the back of your throat. It had gotten to the point of the night that you were no longer wincing at the warmth of it. “Why? Am I not allowed to be here?” You joked, a playful smile still stuck to your face.

How could you be so okay around him? Were you really over him? His thoughts plagued his mind as he poured a drink of his own, smiling down at you as you watched him. You used to go to parties together, Marcus would always make your drinks and he wouldn’t let you leave his sight. But now here you were, making drinks for yourself.

“It’s just not your scene, that’s all.” Marcus commented, sipping on the drink. He hated it, but he needed it if he were to spend the next few hours here with you. He needed the confidence to hopefully speak to you.

“I know. This dress is far too tight, I feel like I’m exposed,” you laughed, earning one from him, “anyway, how’s things been with you?”

“Same old. What about you?”

“Not much going on at the moment,” you answered him, you both hated small talk. You used to sit at home together and thank the Heavens you didn’t have an awkward small talk phase, but here you were, racking your brain for things to talk about.

You finished your drink, still feeling tipsy at most. “Well, Marcus. I hope you enjoy your night, I’m gonna go see what Mason and Declan are laughing about.” Marcus nodded and watched you leave, both boys welcoming you with laughter and tight squeezes. What he would give to feel your arms around him again. It was criminal having to watch you parade around for hours, talking to his teammates and not him, pretending he was over you when he wasn’t.

“So,” Mason challenged, nudging your arm lightly with his, “you and Marcus are talking again?”

You shook your head, flicking your head back to look at him. His eyes quickly diverted as they met yours, now focusing on the detailing of the bottles opposite him. “No, nothing like that. I was just greeting him.”

“I think you should.” Declan stated, honestly. Arms folded and face completely serious.

“And why would I do that? He broke up with me, why should I reconnect with him?”

“Because you clearly still like him, Y/N. It’s obvious,” Declan confessed, and as you went to look at Mason for some support, he just nodded, “just talk to him. Even if it’s to arrange a proper meeting.”

Declan was right. He always was. You just sighed and leant into Mason, who held you tightly to his side. You weren’t prepared for this at all, you were barely prepared to even see the man, let alone have a heart-to-heart with him.

You handed Mason your cup, approaching Marcus, who looked rather blasé about the party happening around him. He didn’t even notice you walking up to him, but he felt a hand on his forearm and looked down to see your distinctive hands. The tiny tattoo you had on the side of your middle finger. It was you.

“I think we need to talk.”

You led him upstairs, into the room that you’d be staying in tonight. Jesse and Jadon silently cheering behind you as you entered the room and closed the door. The music was now muffled, and you could hear the occasional laugh. You sat on the bed beside Marcus, almost a meter between the two of you. You were unsure of where to start.

“So, has your football really improved since I’ve left?” You questioned, Marcus shifting uncomfortably as you’d gone straight into the deep end. He couldn’t bare to look at you, still ashamed about that Thursday evening three months ago.

“Stayed about the same.” He admitted quietly, ready for your wrath. But it never came. You were always a relaxed person, that’s what attracted Marcus to you in the first place. But if you were mad, he’d always be the one to calm you down, to help you back into your calm state.

“We broke up for nothing, got it.” You noted sarcastically, your head falling into your hands with a heavy sigh.

“Y/N, I’m sorry. Really, I am.” He apologised, his large hand finding it’s way onto your thigh. It reminded you of your times in the car, he knew you hated the motorways, so he’d drive with a hand on your thigh whenever you were on one.

“Just save it, Marcus, what’s done is done.” You stood up to leave, but he held your wrist gently. Marcus was never violent, never harsh, he was the perfect lover. Which is why it hurt so much that he left you.

“No.” He firmly declared, joining you as you stood up, “I’m not saving it. I never had the chance to tell you all of this, so I’m doing it now. I never wanted to leave you, I was told that whatever was going on at home was clearly getting in my head, and it’s making me slack at work. And like an idiot, I listened. I believed that if I was good at work, nothing else mattered. So I left you.”

You winced, recalling the memories once again. You didn’t want to live through that again. Marcus was now opposite you, little distance between the pair of you. “And it’s the worst mistake I’ve ever made.”

You couldn’t contain yourself. All the emotions you’d felt for Marcus, that you’d believed had gone, were still very much present and pushing you to just kiss him. So you did, his large hands held your face as you looked up, joining your lips together after months apart. You fit perfectly under him, his hands felt familiar the second they grazed your skin.

“I shouldn’t still be in love with you.” He conceded, pulling apart from your lips, keeping his hands on your cheeks. “But I am. I can’t move on from you, Y/N.”

“Good.” You mumbled back, gripping the sides of his shirt tightly and pulling him back into you, “because I can’t move on either.”

[artzee-bee]

Headcanons | Adrien Agreste x blind!reader

Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug

Request: kinda? by thebunniwagon “ How about one where the reader has a form of disability; being deaf, blind, etc. “

Genre: headcanons (fluff)

Warnings: none that I’m awear of

A/N: A long time ago I made a post asking for mlb requests and this was in the replies so I’ve been experimenting with it since. I’ve never done headcanons before and honestly, it was really challenging (who would have thought?? It’s like 3 times less writting!) but I hope this is somewhat good and that I was able to accurately represent and talk about blindness. I am open to any comments or criticism you have, I am trying my best to educate myself.

~~~

You met Adrien on your first day of school. He was the one to show you around and introduce you to all his friends

He walked you around school everyday until you learned where everything was. He introduced you to his friend group and did his best to make you feel welcome and at home in your new environment. 

Adrien would definitely be very overprotective at first!! Whenever you’d have to go to the library he’d insist on coming with you to help you find your book, no matter how many times you explained to him you could just ask the librarian. At lunch he would be by your side always, making sure you didn’t trip or run into someone, even though you were perfectly capable of getting to your table by yourself. 

As you grew closer, he learned to trust you more, even though he was still very attentive with you and your needs. Adrien always went out of his way to help you with whatever you needed.

Whenever you two would go on a school trip or somewhere you hadn’t been before, he’d give you his arm to hold onto. Partly so you wouldn’t get lost but mostly because it made it so much easier for you two to gossip in secret.

You began dating around 4 months after meeting for the first time. Your first date was at a pottery class. Adrien thought it would be fun and unique. The day was indeed a success. You both came home with 2 messed up flower pots, with both your initials engraved on the bottom. Your clothes were dirty and you had clay and paint underneath your fingernails but it didn’t matter because you were too absorbed by each other’s presence to care.

When you’d start visiting Adrien at home, he’d often play the piano for you,especially if you are stressed or tired. Sometimes, if you were studying at his place and you’d get overwhelmed, Adrien would simply go to the piano and play a happy tune. It always managed to cheer you up.

You two would go on so many shopping dates!! Adrien would describe the patterns and colors of clothes you’d pick out and help you find something that would fit you just right!! This meant, more times than not, having to deal with the bossy, sassy side of Adrien. As a model, he was very particular about picking outfits. At times he’d drive you nuts but than he’d make up for it by hyping you up almost every time you tried on something

Aside from helping you pick out clothes, Adrien always helped you with your makeup. He would help you find the products you needed while in the store and pick out your shade for you. He tried learning how to put on makeup too, but after 2 or 3 attempts, you both decided it’d be better if he simply let you do your thing. He still sits by your vanity everyday while you are getting ready.

Adrien was the most supportive and caring partner you could ever ask for! He’d be by your side forever and than some more, because nothing could ever compared to the butterflies he still felt every time you laughed with him

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: July 10th

I really let asks get away from me lately. I was super focused on working on that Patreon Moment. With that done I can finally think about doing other things, so here’s a new collection of answers!

Thank you for sending in questions everyone ^^.

For the new Patreon moment, will you be able to reference it in step 4? Or just like a tiny nod to it if you pick certain choices?

There won’t be. I’m sorry if you were hoping for that! The Patreon moment is meant to be entirely optional, it’s not something that gets you extra content in the main game.

Is the new CG artist the main one now? :0 I’ve noticed theres been a difference in the art style recently. Is the old CG artist still going to make art for the game? :0

The original artist still makes CGs for the game sometimes, but he mainly focuses on character sprites.

Are you going to put the NSFW our life moment on a website other than patreon? I would love to get it but I can't use patreon atm.

I don’t know. I'm afraid we can't release the Patreon Moment on a normal game storefront because we can't mix 18+ content with our family friendly game. If there's some other place similar to Patreon where it's not the normal type of full-scale public content releases we'd consider using that, but I’m not sure if there is another site that’s better than Patreon in that regard. I'm sorry.

Out of curiosity, in all of your games so far, which characters in each were the most fun to write? They obviously don't have to be your favorite characters!

Buffalo Seer in AFA, really everyone in XOD/XOBD is pretty equally entertaining to write, The Guide in LoV, and Cove in OL!

idk if you accept "personal" questions, but is there anything you've been watching/ listening to lately

Mostly, I’ve been watching/listening to Authortube videos as of late! It’s people who talk generally about the process of how books become traditionally published and/or share their own experience as they attempt to be published. I don’t have an interest in writing normal text based books, but it’s really interesting to hear about that world. I’m listening to a video about royalties right now as I answer these asks.

Will one of the desserts we get to pick be fudge? That'd be such a cute reference! 

Haha, yeah, it should. Unless I completely blank on it and forget when trying to include the various referential food options.

I don't know if this has been asked previously but what would be the approximate heights for the presets MC can choose from Step 2 ~ 4? Are there any measurement you had in mind? Sorry if I didn't make myself clear kk I've been struggling with my English lately 💀 

I don’t know, ahah. I didn’t have any numbers in mind for that. So it’s whatever you imagine it is!

I noticed a bug with the Patreon moment when it comes to what your character wears. When Jamie and Cove are kissing while my character only had dresses selected, I had both the option to remove the dress or to remove the shirt... Picking one of the options to interact with Cove, after he removed his shirt, it had Jamie remove their shirt followed by ther pants despite only having dresses picked. 

Thank you for reporting ^^

I keep refreshing steam to see when the new doc for xobd will be released. I noticed you haven't posted anything about it in quite some time. Would it be possible to ask about a timeline/potential date? (If it's even this year—) I know you and your team are probably working super hard, I'm just super curious! ~Thank you!~ 

There are more stories done, I just haven’t gotten around to publicly releasing them. Hopefully I will have a chance to spend the time on that sooner rather than later!

hello!! i’m not sure if it’s an update but i’ve just replayed our life and at the end i can’t propose to cove anymore? :(( i’ve actually tried playing twice but the options are not there anymore, did you guys remove the options? i’m sorry if you’ve answered this before!! thank you and have a good one :) 

I’m afraid things haven’t been changed or removed, so I think you might’ve accidentally picked the wrong things somewhere along the way and locked yourself out of being able to propose by mistake. Sometimes you meant to say you want to get married but instead you mis-click and have it so the MC isn’t thinking about marriage or something. All I can suggest is starting from the beginning of Step 3 and making sure to follow the steps listed in the FAQ. I’m sorry for that.

Did yall remove some of the options for when youre making out with Cove in the charity moment? I could've sworn you could grab his bonkadonk and its not there anymore 

This is the same situation as the above. We didn’t remove things and you’re not wrong that there are sometimes those options. But there are various choices you have to make to get those options and it sounds like you accidentally missed something. If your relationship isn’t long-term, you can’t do it for example.

HI IM SO EXCITED I CAN FINALLY GET THE STEP 3 DLC 

Thank you for getting it!

Is Shiloh super totally straight bc I’m very gay and a huge Shiloh fan, would my man make an exception?😩

Sadly, he is one of our super straight characters. I’m sorry.

Hi, I have a very dumb question. In Step 2 does Cove not wanna share his drink with us at the mall (or rather why he stops drinking it) because it's an indirect kiss? Or is it like ...weird to him to share? Because if I remember right he eats off our spoon in the birthday scene right? 

Yeah, he’s awkward about it because he likes the MC and it feels very personal to share a straw with his crush.

Hi! If you don't mind me asking, who is the artist for OL2? Their style is so pretty! 

Thank you for saying so! This is her Twitter- https://twitter.com/redridingheart

Do Beginnings & Always and Now & Forever exist in the same universe? 

Yep! XOXO Droplets also exists in the same universe. It’s one big GB Patch world, haha.

Do Pran's parents regret the way they raised him? Do they feel ashamed of it?

No. They’re the type of people best cut out because they’re not gonna change. Which is why Pran does go very limited contact when he’s an adult.

Hi! I just wrapped up my second playthrough of Our Life, and I absolutely adore it, but I had a question. I went to the gallery and found I was missing 2 CGS (specifically Step 1-3 and 2-3) and I had no clue where they would've shown up. Which moments are those found in? 

You get it by telling Cove about his dad offering you money to be his friend in Step 1 and Step 2. You can’t get both in one playthrough, since you can only tell Cove the truth once. I’m really glad you liked it!

Hi hi! Please, how tall is Baxter and Derek? Love the game so much and I can't wait to see more! 

I don’t know, aha. I think Baxter was around 5′10 and Derek was like 5′8/5′9, maybe. I really am not one who has specific heights for things in mind.

is adult cove a bottom, top, or switch? 

A switch, though would choose the top if he had to pick.

I was wondering if there is a way to transfer save data? Even if through the game files. I wanted to be able to transfer my save data from my desktop over to my laptop so that I could continue playing right where I left off from but I'm not entirely sure how to go about that. 

If you save the save folder/persistent data of the game from your desktop and put it into the game folder on your other device, that could work.

Hi! Is it possible for us to know the date when our life: now and forever comes out on steam? Sorry if you've mentioned it before but I haven't seen it and I'm looking foward to that happening and just wanted to know :) 

It’s gonna be a long time, I’m afraid. There’s no estimate right now.

I started playing Our Life with my sister a while ago, and I think you guys should know that we discovered your secret. >:)

L from death note and Cove are clearly the same person, and this whole game is just an origin story!!

I’ve never seen that show so I’m sorry to say I don’t understand the connection/reference you’re trying to make. I’m pretty out of the loop when it comes to media. I don’t watch movies or TV.

Will OL2 have options for disabled MCs?

I understand if it's too complicated, just curious

Unfortunately, it’s not really something we have a plan for. We couldn’t finish the game if we tried to include every disability and have it be meaningful. It’d just be too much content to create. But if we decide to only include a few, how would we choose which disabilities get to be represented and which are left out? I don’t know. It’ll probably have to be something we don’t include as an option again, sadly. I’m sorry.

playing our life > anything else 

Haha, I’m glad you’re enjoying it.

Honestly, I would like to thank Our Life for helping me come to terms with my sexuality. Before, I never would've actually thought that it was possible to like boys romantically and still be asexual. Almost all of the BL visual novels I've read had unskippable sexual content in them and it honestly just didn't click with what I feel. I'm glad I found Our Life. I love the game, the developers, and this fandom so much. Now, I can safely come out as homoromantic AND asexual (at least anonymously here anyway; my parents are still huge homophobes 😂). 

Aw, it’s great to hear you felt comfortable being yourself in the game! That’s wonderful. I’m really sorry about your parents, though.

Will the demo for OL2 be on android? Really not sure if I could wait any longer than I have to aha 

Yeah, it’ll be available for Android once we eventually release a demo!

Do all these reveals perhaps mean development is progressing ahead of schedule? Please let that be the case I'm already obsessed with Qiu 

No, sorry, aha. Art comes along much faster than script/programming-work for us. It’s gonna be a long time before the game is a finished thing you can actually play. But at least we can look at the beautiful images.

Hey! First of all I wanna say I reallllllyyyyy loooovvveeee Our Life and XOXO Droplets! I have over 300 hours of playtime on Our Life… Anyways, I was just wondering, are the Derek and Baxter DLCs going to come out at the same time? If not, which one do you plan to release first? :3 

They will come out separately and Derek will be first! Glad you like the game.

I keep replaying Our Life to get every possible iteration and I am loving it <3 I was wondering if Cove gets locked out of his confession because MC was talking to Lee, would it be possible to confess to him in step 4? 

Yeah, you can avoid the confession in Step 3 and then get it in Step 4.

Hi, my Cove wears bracelets through step 2 and 3 but I still don't get an option to give him a bracelet? I didn't even know that was possible until I seen someone else ask about it lol 

Hm, did you use the Cove creator? Maybe there’s a bug where using the creator to add bracelets doesn’t fulfill the requirement to give Cove a bracelet in Step 3.

Wait, I'm dense, when does Baxter appear in step 2? Is it from big park firework? I feel so bad since i really love Baxter and waiting to buy his dlc. 

It’s in the Soiree Moment. You have to be just friends with Cove, indifferent, or crushing but not ask Cove to the dance at all. Then while there you can find someone new to dance with. But if you bring Cove to the dance while crushing, the MC won’t wanna dance with anyone else so you can’t get the scene.

In step 2 when we go to the soiree I made my mc go alone and baxter chooses the mc to dance, i'm curious, why did he pick the mc? sorry if this has been asked before! 

Because the MC looked to be around his age, seemed to also be searching for a partner, and had nice legs. A perfect option for him.

I read some of the FAQs, and I saw that we could tell Baxter about the condo that he rented there was previously the mean old grandparents. how do we get the mc to tell him that? 

It happens in the DLC Moment “Late Shift”. If you don’t have a job you instead get a longer scene with Baxter.

I don’t know if you’ve addressed this or not, but are you planning on paying voice actors for our life: now and forever? 

Yeah, we pay our VAs in all our projects.

hey can i ask how you did the moments thing in ol? im trying to get into making visual novels and while im VERY sure its out of my comfort zone and all that atm i kinda wanna know just for the future, bc im p sure it would work well for something i wanna do :O but its also fine if you cant say for other reasons :> 

I’m afraid I’m not sure what you mean. Are you asking how we programmed the screen or something script related? Adding Moments like that is pretty straightforward, though. You just have buttons that open to different labels and then the scripts are essentially individual short stories/vignettes. Good luck with your VN!

Since Autumn becomes gender fluid later in the game, will there be a character who remains as he/him to romance in game? 

OL1 has the he/him LIs, OL2 is all about other genders.

I don't want to impose on your creative plans, but a parrot could possibly make a good pet in an OL-type game? They're pretty long-lived and likely to still be thriving by the end even if the MC got them back in step 1. 

I do appreciate the suggestion, but I’m afraid it’s not likely going to happen. I understand there are technically some animals that could theoretically live long enough to last the whole game that or we could have the MC only get a pet after some years have already passed. But the many things that would have to be considered/accommodated for makes it just something we probably can’t manage adding. I’m sorry.

As time passes will we be able to see Qiu and Tamarack's other stage arts as well?

They are both so cute i can't wait to be friends with them!

Yeah, we’ll show content from other Steps in the future. It’ll be a little while from now, though.

Can you date Cove and still have your family comfort you in the car?

You can’t get Cove’s Step 3 confession scene if you have the family comfort you in the car. But that’s not the only way to date him. You can get together with him earlier in the game or later on in Step 4.

Is Mc always going to be the one walking down the aisle or could Cove do it? Also could you choose to have one of your moms walk you? 

No. Cove wouldn’t want to walk down the aisle like that and the MC automatically respects that. And the MC also gets to have their preferences respected, so it’s up to you whether they want to do an aisle walk or not. You also can pick who, if anyone, walks with you.

Once step 4 is out, will you be able to go the whole game on crush/love without either of you confessing? 

Yes, as long as you tell the game you don’t want to progress the relationship. Even in Step 4 it won’t force you to officially get together.

Howdy, so in Step 4, there will be any Romance with Derek that is not part of any dlc? 

He’s only a friend unless you get his romance story.

Will the step 4 in OL2 be one big step or are you considering moments? 

Step 4 is just an epilogue in both games.

hi kind of a weird question but!! we know tht cliff doesn't start dating again but. wht abt flings? like does he ever do 1 night stands or anything? thank u!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Nope. Cliff has a very small interest in sex. If he’s not in a real relationship with a partner he’s crazy about it simply isn’t something he feels a need for, so one night stands wouldn’t even cross his mind.

sorry if you've already answered this, but i was wondering if there were plans for there to be bonus love interests in OL2 like how we have derek and baxter in OL1.

Maybe! There are side characters who could be given romance stories, but whether or not it will happen depends on funding and how long everything else takes to finish.

I don't know if i'm allowed to ask about ol2 here yet, if not u can ignore this or answer it later. My question is can you date one of them and be good friends with the other? I don't want to be strangers with the other bcs i love them both a lot :<

Yes you can!

what patreon level do i have to be to unlock the nsfw moment? im on the $5 one right now, will that give me access to the moment, or just access to the moment progress? 

That’ll give you access! Tier 2 and anything higher allows the player to download it.

[mazuwii]

Zeke SFW Alphabet

Flying monke

Hey bestie, I see you like Mr Monke😏

No shame! No shame!😤 I am writing the chapters everyone has requested but I got asked to do a Zeke alphabet first so here it is

—A (Affection. How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

•Not very physically affectionate in public, he tends to give you stares that gives you the same warm feeling you get from being hugged tightly.

•When you crash into him for a hug, he's so shocked and confused, his heart is dancing at the feeling of your warm little body right against his, affectionately rubbing his back. Before he knows it, he's silently crying, holding your face to his chest so that you don't see.

•Zeke never knew hugs felt so nice and now whenever he's feeling down or whenever you both have nothing to do, he randomly opens his arms up and waits for you to run into them. If you take too long all he does is twitch his hands slightly, which is funny and cute.

•I can see him being way more affectionate in the nighttime, where you're sleeping on him and you mumble under your breath, he kisses your head and strokes your cheek, lovingly gazing at you.

—B (Bestfriend, how would he be like as a best friend, how would the friendship start?)

•Zeke would be the bestest friend ever, sure he isn't the most affectionate or upfront friend but he is incredibly reliable!

•Always defending you behind your back. He insults you but then compliments and uplifts you behind your back to other people. Basically your lawyer.

•I will never stop saying this, Zeke Jaegar is intelligent as fuck and hates small talk so his conversations are so delicious, so full of flavour. His intelligence turns you on so hard, he is so fun to talk to because A, he makes fair points and teaches you things, B, he has a good sense of humour, C, he genuinely listens. He wants your opinion and understands your point of view on the subject.

—C (Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

•Before getting into a relationship, he always thought hugs would be stiff and horrible, especially in bed but he discovered that he was wrong.

•When you were spooning him, he couldn't nearly think straight from the appreciation he felt. Your arm was so secure around his waist and your body was warm against him, it was a feeling that made him wish he was immortal and experience this FOREVER!

•He likes it when you bring yourself to him, automatically. He finds it cute and always compliments you when you do. It isn't a full-of-shit-flattery compliment, he means it.

•"Why- on this gruesome green earth, are you so cute?" He kisses your head as you nestle yourself on his chest. "Mind telling me? Hm?" He pecks your head again and tightens his arm around you.

•One thing he will die to protect is you, he wants to hide you away from all the horrors of the world and treasures you so much and one way to do it is to tightly hold you right against him, melting at the sound of your giggle.

—D (Domestic. Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

•Zeke wants to live in a cottage with you, secluded from other humans. All the serenity of it relaxes him, it's one thing he'd never stop thinking about.

•Sure he wants to settle down but he'd never want to have kids. He sees himself as a failure to all and can see his little ones hating his guts, having to hear them exclaim how much they hate their papa (even if it's just his imagination) terrifies him.

•He felt like everyone hated him, but you and his grandparents and Mr Ksaver. Children would be too much stress

•As for cooking and cleaning, I don't think he's good with cooking or cleaning. He doesn't really make a mess so it's okay that he isn't good at cleaning

•However he isn't bothered with cooking actual food, he'd always just have fruit or instant noodles when he's hungry. So you'd have to be a good cook because my mans has no motivation for that stuff

—F (Fiance(e) How would they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

•Like I said before, Zeke isn't good on relationships so if you both last more than a year and he realises you've helped him as a person and he has helped you, he secures it.

•But proposing would be difficult, he's shy, scared, worried you may laugh and blow him off.

•Eventually he gives in and asks, a heavyweight washing off his shoulders when you said yes, even getting butterflies when he realised you were crying.

—G (Gentle. How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

•His inner child is bruised, you can see a little boy in him anytime he smiles properly, it makes your heart shatter to know that he never experienced his childhood properly and is currently a little boy in an old man's body

•He is gentle, he tries so hard to be soft with you and touches you like you're made of glass. H o w e v e r, my man does not hold back when it comes to baseball.

•Zeke is so happy when he's playing baseball with you that he doesn't realise he may have thrown too hard and only realises it when you grunt at the impact it made with your collarbone, dropping everything and running to check on you.

—H (Hugs. Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

•He hesitates at first when your smaller body collides with his, he had let out a small yelp but couldn't help smiling when your arms get tighter in desperation.

•Slowly and gently, he'd embrace you back and smell your hair.

•Zeke's hugs are warm, secure and surprisingly cuddly. He's too shy to hug you first, you'd have to hug him first and he'd not hesitate anymore. Sometimes, when he's missed you so much, he'd hug so tight that your legs float off the floor, completely powerless in his embrace.

—I (I love you. How fast do they say the L-word)

•Zeke thinks a lot so admitting that he loves you would be an epiphany, even years into the relationship. He genuinely can't believe someone loves him and stayed with him.

•He'd say it with a kiss to your forehead, small freckles of tears glistening in his eyes when he stares longingly at you.

—J (Jealousy. How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous)

•Very jealous but he keeps it to himself. Especially when it comes to the opposite sex. He realises anytime a man talks to you and you smile around them, he can feel himself shrink. He's all dramatic in his head, wondering if he'd ever been enough for you or if you finally realised you deserved a better guy than him.

•All of those thoughts would disappear when you take his hand or talk to him with the tone you always use with him, a cheerful and appreciative one.

—K (What are his kisses like? Where does he like to kiss you? Where does he like to be kissed?)

•Zeke's kisses are hesitant and full of pauses. Sometimes you do most of the work, bringing him closer and all that while he's questioning if he deserves you.

•When Zeke tries to be affectionate, he likes to kiss your forehead, crown of your head, cheek, lips in private. It's reassuring and he loves his little lady more than anything. This small kiss passes on so much serotonin through your skull.

•Zeke doesn't have a specific preference but when you pepper his face with kisses it makes him so happy and fireworks go off in his tummy. With your hands gently cupping his face and your lips pressing every area on his face he softly holds onto you with a flustered smile.

—L (Little ones. How are they around children)

•Lol, he's like their older bro but a lil more distant

Let's move on...

—M (Morning. How are mornings spent with them?)

•Zeke's life is full of duties and priorities but he wishes with his full heart that he could spend the rest of his life lazily holding you with you peacefully laying by his side

•To his dismay, he must leave you to sleep. He has to get up earlier and doesn't bother waking up his sleeping angel, getting ready for work and leaving- not without kissing your cheek. Even if you're fast asleep, Zeke tucks you in and pecks your cheek, admiring you for a few seconds before heading on with his day.

•I'd say on good days, you make an effort to wake up with him and make breakfast so that he doesn't go to work and smoke ciggerates on an empty stomach. Fucking idiot, sorry but don't do that 🙄 even to my readers, don't smoke bestie💜

—N (Night. How are nights spent with them?)

•He does sleep at a reasonable time, sometimes at ten PM, sometimes at eight PM..

•Before bed he'd watch a documentary with you while having dinner and probably tire himself out by sucking in all that knowledge (the TV voice makes him sleepy, so you can see his eyelids drooping when he lies about how he isn't tired... it's cute)

•When it's time for bed he does the usual routine and gets into bed after smoking... which is pretty painful for you to watch but you won't scold him, you'll bring him closer to you and kiss his nose, massaging his scalp and becoming limp when his hand is soft at your waist, caressing patterns with his slender fingers until you fall asleep.

—O (Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

•Zeke thinks he is the scum of the Earth and wouldn't be surprised if you thought so too. It'd be difficult for him to mention any of his trauma so it all comes out through his humour.

•Daddy issues jokes, mommy issues jokes, self-deprecating jokes and you go through so many until you realise the man is traumatised. I can say with full confidence that he once tried making a joke for the millionth time and ended up crying instead of laughing. Of course, you were reassuring and comforted him in every way he needed.

—P (Patience. How easily angered are they?)

•Very patient when it comes to his S/O, he doesn't force anything out of you and slowly, gently speaks.

•Zeke doesn't become angry easily, honestly, he's so smart and open-minded that it becomes a problem because he understands so many things, unable to use his emotions to his advantage.

•Again, emotions pass and are useless to him, they just come and go so he doesn't like feeling too vividly. Especially anger, he thinks there's no use in it.

—Q (Quizzes. How much would they remember about you?  Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing or do they kind of forget everything?)

•Like I keep saying, Zeke is a smart, attentive person even when he doesn't mean to be. He pays attention to small details by accident and remembers subconsciously. He memorises a lot of your habits, bad and good and makes notes of when and where they mostly happen, adapting to your lifestyle without realising.

•Someone is asking what to get for your birthday and tries to get a type of chocolate flavour he remembers you despise and he gives away your full interests and a list of what you like, dumping an essay of your public info to one of your best friends and they're just like °_°...?

•It's cute, he just doesn't know his brain sucks everything about you in

—R (Remember. What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

•When you took him out to dance and the music suddenly switched from formal dancing to just 'go crazy' and he watched you GO OFF. You were shaking your hip and hopping around energetically, glaring at him for laughing his ass off over the loud music.

•You forced him to dance with you, both of you whipping your hair back and forth, your movements less stiff but nonetheless, in sync. He's never had so much fun. No one he knew was there, it was all strangers but he felt like only you and he were there, dancing freely to the music, he'd just follow your lead confidently

—S (Security. How protective are they? How would they like to be protected?)

•Zeke is so protective, paranoid but never expressing it, knowing he'd sound insane:

-"Angel, I have to go out with you because what'll happen if you suddenly get run over?!"

-"No you can't use the phone while it's in charge, what if it explodes in your face?!"

-"Cookie dough, don't try handstanding, you could snap your neck!"

-"No, I won't let you go up these faulty escalators, they could suddenly break open and swallow you, here let me hold your hand up the normal stairs."

-"Don't lean against the balcony, you could fall over!"

•So instead he does it sneakily. Like small solutions, in order, he'd: offering to help you shop when you go out, making you put your phone down to massage him, scaring you into stopping your handstands, holding your waist securely when you're both on the balcony.

•To feel protected, Zeke needs constant reassurance from you. Physically and emotionally. A small kiss on his cheek and a little "Don't overthink, I'm here, let it all out, I'll listen to your thoughts."

—T (Try. How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

•I think Zeke is more of a private person but his dates can be fun too. For anniversaries, you'd both have turns. For his half of the day, it would be spent playing baseball, going to the arcade, taking you out to dinner and then he'd warmly hold your hands in his, asking you what you want to do now.

•His gifts are so thoughtful but he tries to be cool when he gives it to you, lips straight and eyes avoiding you like a shy schoolboy. He can't keep his cool since you have to attack his face with kisses🙄 Jees Y/n stop it, he totally doesn't go insane when you do that to him, totally isn't in love

—U (Ugly. What are some bad habits of theirs?)

•I'd say the damn smoking. Zeke chose an unhealthy coping mechanism and needs guidance out of it, so you do just that.

•Taking his cigarettes and helping him get the nicotine out of his body through skipping rope, taking him to the sauna and even massaging his scalp when he has a headache.

•If course it'd be such a shock to him when he realises how nice he feels after his addiction is over, it's amazing what getting rid of one bad habit can do to your life.

—V (Vanity. How concerned are they with their looks?)

•Zeke trimmed his beard shorter and did his hair when he realised he had seemed to be ageing faster but... for the sake of my selfishness this is a modern au

•Surprisingly, he actually has good skin, a nice beard and a good haircut. Zeke is beautiful.

•Only once, has he ever shaved fully and my guy looked 10 years younger and was lowkey getting cocky but he rathered the beard and let it grow out... not too long though

—W (Whole. Would they feel incomplete without you?)

•Zeke is like the moon, it's a bit dark but it's still useful, however, it needs the sun to give it a boost? So what I'm trying to say is you're the sun to him, life wouldn't feel the same now that you've made your mark

—X (Xtra. A random headcanon for them.)

•I don't care what you say, he can do the entire dance for boy with luv by BTS. He doesn't know why he knows it so well, he's only seen the dance rehearsal once (yes he memorizes pretty fast)

•extra but, by the way, Monke man can figure out a Rubix cube faster than a War breaking out in AOT so... haha very fast👁👁

—Y (Yuck. What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

•He doesn't like a controlling partner, not everything has to go your way babe, life is always going to steer you in a different direction and it sometimes is in a better direction than the one you had first intended.

•So there's that

—Z (Zzz. What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

•This is funny to me for some reason? But once he lets go of your cuddle, he subconsciously sprawls his body out, and he does it for the entire night even when you're on top of him, his clothes are somehow half-off. The pillows are everywhere, the blanket is under his heavy thighs so you're freezing on him :")