#and YES I'M AWARE IT'S TWICE AS LONG AS THE LAST

[umbral-archives]

Kinktober 2024: Day 4 | Choking/Breath Play + Illinois

Rating: NSFW MINORS DNI

AMAB!Reader/Masc

Pairing: Illinois (Markiplier CU) x AMAB!Reader

Warnings: Choking/Breath Play, Pet Names, Toys (Whip, but not used how you think ahaha), mentions of Oral (M receiving, reader giving), VERY MILD Orgasm Denial

Word Count: ... 806 (echo lissen)

Warm, calloused fingers graze over your neck, following the divot of your Adam's apple into the valley between your collar bones. You swallow beneath them as they trail back up, that hand wrapping around your throat with a practiced motion and you grunt. Your neglected cock twitches in protest, but you make no move to alleviate it.

You’re not allowed to touch–not until he says so.

Illinois looms above you as you lay sprawled out on the bed, head hanging off the side just enough to get the right angle. His eyes are transfixed on your mouth, his expression a mixture of concentration and lust. It’s not his cock he’s guiding down your throat, though.

No, the adventurer is feeding the handle of a very particular whip into your mouth as a stand-in for it, using the thing as a measure to determine how deep you can actually take him now. Given, he’s been training you for weeks to take him to the base, but that’s his cock…

This is something entirely different, and you can’t help but feel ashamed at the way it sinking deeply affects you. The familiar haze of lightheadedness starts up the further it goes, but you try not to squirm.

You want to do this. You want to be good, make him proud.

Illinois’ hand tightens when it reaches your upper limit, shuddering somewhat–like he can almost feel it under his hand. You already can’t breathe, but then it bumps the back of your throat, easing in just a little further.

You let out a pathetically aroused whine suddenly and he grunts, hips jerking slightly and losing himself a little to the idea. God. Fuck. The mission is all that’s keeping you together, arousal and stubbornness holding you there while your vision starts to blur.

Why is this getting to you so easily?

The burn grows dizzying, tears prickling at the corners of your eyes and you finally gag, hands pushing at his thighs as a sign for him to back off. Illinois does so just enough for you to breathe deeply through your nose, coughing a little and swallowing around it you try to catch your breath.

“Oh honey,” he drawls lazily, hand flexing over your throat while he steps back to get a proper look at you, “how’re you gonna take my cock if you can’t handle my whip?”

You grumble indignantly around the intrusion, embarrassment and desire heating your cheeks further. This isn’t even his whip–it’s a silicone copy he’d had made for these exact scenarios. It’s usually wrapped around your throat or used to tie you up.

The adventurer rubs soothing circles over your chest, giving you that signature smile of his. “You have one more try in you? If we don’t get it, we’ll move on.”

You nod weakly, fingers digging into his thighs lightly. Despite the oddness of the method, you want to do this.

Illinois’ expression changes to that soft, hungry look again and he returns to his previous position, gently feeding the handle back down your throat. You breathe through your nose carefully until you can’t anymore, willing your body to relax for him.

Wanna be good.

In your mind’s eye, you imagine the girth in your throat as Illy’s cock instead, the weight he feels beneath his palm being his own doing. The image mixes with sensation and you feel it slot even deeper, eyes rolling back in your head as that lightheadedness returns twofold.

“Fuck, that’s it, darlin’, just like that–you’re doin’ so good for me.”

You moan weakly, his words going straight to your groin. It’s the idea of his face, twisted with desire and pride as you take him to the base that makes you relax just that little bit further. Despite the way your head swims and lungs burn, the thrill shuddering down your spine keeps you in place.

You trust him.

“Just a little more…”

The base of the handle finally brushes against your lips and he swears, squeezing again. That alone drives a spike of arousal deep into your gut and your hips buck harshly off the bed, precum dribbling down onto your stomach. You feel like you’re floating.

“Fuck, baby boy, you took it all.”

Illinois' voice almost cracks, he's that turned on. The praise adds to the rush that slams into you once he eases the handle out, kisses pressed to your shoulder as you breathe erratically.

Your high remains even as the spots in your vision start to fade, though if that’s from the adrenaline or the praise, you don’t know.

“Good boy, I knew you could do it for me,” he all but purrs, wrapping the whip around your throat and taking it’s previous position. “You take my cock like that and I’ll let you cum as much as you want, yeah?”

[callofdudes]

So, uh, I was watching Bad Boys 2 with my dad and when the shootout scene happened and Marcus accidentally got shot in the ass I couldn’t help but wonder after I was done LMFAOing; how the COD boys (or the guys from 141 if you have a character limit) would react to and deal with having been shot in the ass? Especially if their S/O or best friend was there?

Ouchie ouchie. Here ya go anon! Sorry it took so long!

Getting shot in the ass.

Fucking humiliated.

First off, it hurt and oh boy he would not talk to anyone. If you're not in the immediate vicinity of medical attention he is going to have to be taken care of by one of you.

He'd probably trust either you or Price. He loves Johnny but not enough to touch his whole ass.

If you're his spouse you will 100% try to make jokes to calm him down, and it doesn't end up making it any better. Simon laying on his stomach writhing in pain while you've got him pantsed.

He's never speaking to any of you again. He'd rather be buried alive than have you bandaging his whole asscheek so he doesn't bleed everywhere.

"Are-fuck! Are you done yet!?" He growled, turning into a whine near the end because he's in pain. Come on man...

"Almost Simon, just hang in with me ok?"

He whines, and you continue to as gently as you can patch the wound. And like a meanie you're trying not to laugh the whole time.

When you're done you'll pat his butt gently and help him up. "Fuck you, and fuck that last 20 minutes of my life." He winces, attempting to stand.

"It's an occupational hazard y'know-"

"In my ass. MY BLOODY ARSE!"

"Well it's not bloody anymore...??"

Yeah he's never speaking to you. Or the others. He'll go back to that coffin where he was safe and his beautiful ass wasn't being threatened 24/7.

When you get back if you tell anyone he's suffocating you in your sleep. Not like the medical team will let him go. Surgery to get the bullet out of his arse and then was hurting for weeks.

Glaring constantly because now he has one of those butt pillows that you'd sit on after a BBL. And the recruits are bugging him because, "Got a lift Lt??" "Thought it was already big enough."

His arse is a point of contention for him and now he's being pointed out for the masses.

"You... You want me to help??"

"Nope." He dragged his leg, limping his way as blood spilled.

"You've uh, got a hole in your-"

"I'm very well aware!" He grimaced, trying to ease down on his side. "Other room." He demands.

"I can help-"

"OTHER ROOM."

"Yes sir."

You step away and let Price undo his belt and survey the damage himself. The last time he was bleeding from his arse his military dad was spanking him upside down and sideways.

By the time he realizes he's going to need a little help he's already regretting his life. He's nearly had his balls shot off before, this shouldn't be news to him, but also, why....

Begrudgingly he calls you back in after messing with it enough it hurts twice as much as before.

So you grab some bandages and get to work.

"Don't-"

"I'm very well aware of where my hands are going captain, you're fine."

"Gross."

"You're bleeding."

"Thank you for stating the obvious." He rubbed his forehead, sighing.

You feel less inclined to snicker at Price because the poor man is just trying to make a living fighting crime. He doesn't deserve this. His beautiful soft ass doesn't deserve this.

When you get back he is just wanting the bullet out by that point so he doesn't fight medical. They get the bullet out and he is taking painkillers like they're going out of style. (No, not in an unhealthy way)

Will probably stay between his room and his office. He wants to do work very badly and hasn't enjoyed sitting around doing nothing for long periods of time.

Can't wear his favorite pants now because they're tighter and the seam cuts right into the stitches. Sweatpants and butt pillow it is until he's out of this hell.

Most recruits know not to poke the bear, unlike you. Or Simon.

"Whew, that was close." You panted and looked at Johnny with relief. "No kidding." But as the adrenaline wore off, Johnny felt lightheaded, and fell to his side.

"Ow-" He winced, his leg feeling numb. You quickly rushed to him and looked him over. He wasn't shot anywhere... Oh. Oh, no never mind, yes he was.

"Johnny..."

"Yeah..?"

"You're shot."

Johnny followed your gaze and saw.

Surprisingly calm. Like, out of everyone he doesn't panic as much. Pulls up his shirt into his mouth and tells you to get it out.

You're hesitant because it's trying to pull a bullet out of someone's ass. And pulling a bullet out is never... Fun. But he trusts you, even if his cheeks are glaringly red from utter embarrassment.

But he doesn't want anyone else to do it for some reason, so you do your best.

Long story short, it did not go well. You ended up messing with the wound that his right ass cheek was so swollen. He looked like an idiot. Laying on his stomach in pain while waiting for Evac.

"I'm sorry..." You rubbed his shoulder.

You'd pulled his pants down further, while still being respectful. But man if he didn't look stupid, and it looked like it hurt. One cheek much bigger than the other, red and swollen.

Johnny promised to never get shot in the ass again. After he was put on bed rest because he had an infection. So uh... That was a fun adventure.

"Why the hell did you try to dig the bullet out of my ass??" He looked over at you when you visited him.

"You told me to do that! I told you it was a bad idea."

"Oh yeah..." He sniffled and crossed his arms, pouting his lip.

"Johnny.. come on, it'll get better."

"Well it can't get worse. Can it?"

"Ow!! Bloody- shit!" He slid down a wall and looked down at his side, expecting the stinging pain he felt to have hit his leg, he was dismayed to find the bullet had got him in the ass.

"Oh fucking of course!" He groaned and tried his best to hold something over the wound while still getting bullets pelted at him.

"How're we looking, sergeant??"

Kyle looked back briefly and then adjusted his gun. "Fine! But I've got a bloody hole in my arse!"

"Say again?"

Kyle groaned. Falling out of helicopters, getting shot in the ass, what was next huh?

"I've. Got. A. Bullet. In my ass!!"

Mortified when the others get to him and see he was not lying. Kyle must have just about the worst luck because what the hell is this?? They got him to medical and they did indeed confirm he had a bullet where the sun don't shine.

His perfect, pretty, unscarred butt was now about to be dug into to get a bullet out. How humiliating. He had bad stuff happen to him, but this he refused to talk about.

"How're... How're you feeling?" You asked after he came out of surgery. Still high on drugs, Kyle glared at you. "Don't even..."

"Don't what?" You snickered slightly.

"Oh fuck off..."

You smiled a little and sat down. "Hey, you'll recover. It sucks, but you've gotten through worse."

"Bullet in the ass."

"Had a bullet in the ass."

"It was still there at one point. That was my reality, y/n!"

You lovingly shushed him with a glass of water.

Kyle did not say a word about it. Even when he needed a pillow to help him sit after the surgery, he never pointed it out. And the others saw the look, if they said anything Kyle would drag them behind a shed and suffocate them with said pillow.

And therefore, for everyone's collective safety, it was never brought up.

[marvelfilth]

Little death (18+)

Pairing: Wednesday Addams x f!reader

Warnings: g!p Wednesday, soft Wednesday, established relationship, smut, blow job, cockwarming, lots of Italian petnames.

Summary: working with normies takes a toll on Wednesday, but, luckily, you're always there to make it better.

A/n: I don't know any Italian, so please tell me if I made any mistakes.

Masterlist

You wake up to the sound of the front door clicking shut. Blinking blearily you hide a yawn behind your palm. The clock reads eleven pm and you sigh, wiping the sleep out of your eyes as you trudge into the kitchen, where Wednesday fixes herself a cup of coffee. You frown, stepping into her line of vision.

"Cara mia," she greets, "you should be asleep." She frowns as you unsuccessfully try to hide another yawn.

"I wanted to wait for you." You gesture to the couch and Wednesday grips the cup tighter.

You know she doesn't like it when you sacrifice sleep for her sake, but what she doesn't know is that you can't properly rest without her by your side, holding you like you're the most precious thing in the world.

Lately she's been spending more and more time at the station, working twice as hard as her peers to receive twice as little credit. It's eating away at both of you. She claims it doesn't bother her - the way they refuse to take her seriously, even when she solves cases that usually take months in weeks - but you see it in her rigid posture and the clench of her jaw. She wants recognition and she has every right to demand it.

"I still have some work to do." Her tone is monotone, but her eyes betray her emotions - she hates the words just as much as you do.

You nod. "I'll heat up your dinner." You turn around to busy yourself at the stove, but a hand on your wrist stops you.

"I'm not hungry." Her words are barely a whisper. "Go back to sleep. In our bed."

You want to argue, but you see the look in her eyes, the one that tells you you won't win. So you push her fringe to the side and place a tender kiss to her forehead. "Don't stay too long, okay?"

She nods reluctantly and takes measured steps to her office, a cup of coffee in hand.

You sink against the counter, shaking your head. The girl is going to work herself to death.

You remember the first time you asked her why she is so adamant on working at the police station when she has the money, the means and the skill to open her own firm. You remember the way she stood up straighter (you didn't even know it was possible) and told you only one thing, "No matter how much it pains me to admit it, they're far more experienced then I am, and their expertise is one I can learn from."

You sigh and walk into your bedroom, accompanied by the tapping of Wednesday's typewriter. You decide to give her an hour, tops.

Thing taps on the nightstand rapidly, despite the exhaustion you can clearly see in the added wrinkles on the pale skin. You shake your head, "You'll lose a finger if you do that."

He slumps back dramatically, and you can almost see him huff.

"I'll get her in an hour, don't worry. Just go rest."

He leaves with that, albeit begrudgingly, and you make sure he doesn't go anywhere near Wednesday's office to hide her briefcase.

You spend at least twenty minutes laying on the bed and staring mindlessly at the ceiling. When half an hour passes you get up and make your own cup of coffee, sleep already forgotten by the time you take the last sip.

Thing wiggles a finger at you and you roll your eyes, "It's one cup, Thing, I'll be fine."

He taps on the pillow and you sigh.

"Yes, I'm aware it's almost midnight."

He taps again, this time forcefully and you feel like a reprimanded child.

"Okay! I get it. No need to act like my mom. I just don't want to fall asleep and let Wednesday work until the morning," you mumble, earning a sympathetic pat on your shoulder.

You look at the clock again. Quarter to midnight.

You decide to test your luck.

"I told you to go back to sleep."

You burrow into her neck, your breath fanning the skin there. "You don't need to apologize." You start loosening her tie, and take it off when she doesn't protest.

You freeze in the doorway. Your girlfriend continues typing, but you can tell she hears you shuffling around as you make your way to her.

"You had coffee." She says as soon as your arms circle her shoulders. She sighs and pushes back against you, letting her head fall on your shoulder in a display of vulnerability only you are allowed to witness. "I'm sorry," she utters.

"Cuore mio," she mumbles, tilting her head to grant you access.

You hum, peppering her neck with featherlight kisses, hands sneaking beneath the collar of her shirt to trace her collarbones.

"Let me take care of you, Weds." Your words press into her skin, your lips brushing the sensitive spot on her neck. "Please?"

She pushes your hands away and turns her chair to face you and it's the only answer you need. You sit on her lap, her hands land on your waist, squeezing gently. Her eyes close as you unbutton her shirt, and she relaxes in your hold, almost melting into the leather of her office chair. You waste no time in getting it off, presenting yourself with a delicious view of her pale body. You lean lower to tease her breasts with your teeth. Her hands slide lower on your waist and you take it as a sign to move. You take off her bra in one swift motion and throw it on the floor, latching on the exposed skin faster than it hits the floor.

She whimpers quietly, the sound almost going unnoticed by you. You grind on her lap, feeling her harden, and get back to work, enveloping the other nipple in the warmth of your mouth, enjoying the way she arches into you.

"I'm gonna use my mouth, okay?" You breathe out, palming her over her pants.

She nods shakily as her hands settle on your ass, squeezing possessively. "Anything you want."

You squeeze her shaft before climbing off her lap onto the floor, but she stops you, blinking as she looks around the room. Her eyes glint and she reaches to grab a blanket you gifted her off the small sofa. She folds it neatly before placing it on the floor near her feet, only then allowing you to kneel before her.

You feel like you're about to explode.

"I love you," you whisper, kissing her knee, "so much."

Her face lights up with a rare smile, making your heart squeeze tightly in your chest. "I know, mia amata, I know." The term of endearment so easily slipping past her lips makes you nuzzle into her thigh, littering it with kisses.

You don't know how you got so lucky.

She gently massages your scalp, not rushing you as you both bask in the moment. You pull away just enough to undo her belt and buttons on her pants. She lifts her hips and you slide them off slowly, revealing the bulge poorly concealed by her boxers. Her fingers thread through your hair and you lean to kiss her through the fabric, enhaling her deep, musky scent. The twitch is barely noticeable, but it makes you quicken your pace, eagerly tugging her underwear down to reveal her thick shaft. You sit back on the balls of your feet to take in the sight of her sprawled on the chair, her legs spread and her cock standing proudly, waiting for your mouth to claim it.

Wednesday squeezes the back of your neck, asking, pleading, and you comply, taking the reddened head of her cock between your lips and sucking, enticing a low moan.

You grip her thighs with both hands and bury her shaft deep in your throat, blinking away the tears.

"Don't hurt yourself," she manages to whimper, her fingers painfully tight on your neck.

You hum around her, earning a low whine and start bobbing your head up and down. Her moans grow louder each time your nose buries in her dark hair, her hips snapping up to meet you halfway.

You can tell she's close.

"Just like that, tesorino," She cries out, and finally forces your face down, using you to pleasure herself. You gag around her thick length, swallowing precum.

She thrusts fast, blabbering in Italian as she chases her high. Her eyes roll to the back of her head with a final snap of her hips and she cums, her cock buried deep inside your throat.

You struggle to breath and swallow, pulling away from her and letting her paint your neck and breasts white.

You catch your breath, reveling in her reddened cheeks and heaving chest.

She lazily reaches behind her to rummage around one of the drawers and pulls out a box of wipes. She works slowly, tenderly brushing your skin clean. Then, she tugs on the string of your silk robe, her pupils blowing even wider when your naked body is finally revealed. She pats her thighs and you don't wate a second in straddling her. You pull her in a tender kiss, one full of love and promise.

She guides you up and nudges the tip of her cock against your entrance and you sink down, clenching around her length.

"Can you keep still for me?" She asks, her voice hoarse.

You nod, glancing at the mess of her desk. "How long will it take?" You ask, knowing full well you'd stay forever if that's what she wanted.

"Not long." With that she turns back around, places her chin on your shoulder and goes through the papers on her desk as you struggle not to whine, your pussy pulsing at the slightest nudge from the ravenette.

You relax against her when she finally settles, and burrow your face into her neck, smiling. She places occasional kisses to your temple, making sure not to jostle you too much.

She enjoys torture, but not when it comes to you.

Your eyes start to drop and you decide to busy yourself with undoing her braids, untangling from her to face her fully, the motion making you both swallow back a moan. Your fingers thread through the dark tresses with utmost care, massaging her shoulders on your way up and finally fully undoing her braids, letting her hair fall free.

She looks breathtaking.

"Bed?" She asks, and you realize you've been admiring her far longer than you thought. You nod, slumping against her.

She gets up without as much as a hitch to her breath, cupping your ass and pushing you snug against her, her dick rubbing inside you deliciously. You moan into her ear, urging her to move faster and she complies, gently laying you down on the bed not even five seconds later.

She cradles your face between her palms and peppers it with kisses as she starts moving inside you, setting up a pace. "Anima mia." A kiss on the underside of your jaw. "Luce della mia vita." A chaste kiss on your lips, as she fastens her thrusts. "Sei il mio tutto." She mutters, losing herself in your body.

You're too out of it to understand what she's saying, simply nodding to each statement and squeezing tighter around her with each foreign word. She stretches you, bottoming out in your gushing center. Her mouth busies itself on your breasts, paying enough attention to each hardened nub.

"Wednesday, I'm-" you cry out, pushing her head back down when she tries to look up, "Keep going please, please, please," you moan, letting tears spill free.

"Let go for me," she whispers, "now, cara mia."

You come with a loud cry, arching into her, squeezing her length as she releases inside you with a low whine.

"I love you," you pant as she falls on your chest.

She hums softly, her eyes growing heavier by second, and nuzzles deeper into you. "I love you," she mutters at last, before finally surrendering to sleep.

-------------------

Cara mia - my dear

Cuore mio - my heart

Mia amata - my love

Tesorino - sweetheart

Anima mia - my soul

Luce della mia vita - light of my life

Sei il mio tutto - you're my everything

Requested by 🧞‍♀️ anon

[reiderwriter]

♦️Pardon The Way That I Stare♦️

Chapter 8 of That's What You Get

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Summary: After some encouragement from Emily and Penelope, you try to explain your reaction to Reid at work. Until you find yourself reacting to him more and more, distracting you from doing your job. Warnings: Alcohol consumption, mentions of sex, Reader is just really horny for Reid (REAL). A/N: We're getting closer to the climax and I'm SO beyond excited for everyone to read the next chapter because I think it's going to be so good but also so evil and I enjoy that very much. If you like the series, let me know by dropping a message in the replies or in my inbox, and follow my other account @reiderslibrary for just fics from me without my random thoughts and bullshit in between... You can find masterlist here, and the series masterlist is linked here!

You were stupid, there was no other logical explanation for it. Staring at Emily on your doorstep as your brain stood there, slack-jawed and wide-eyed, trying to process the words she’d just said to you, there was really only one thing running through your brain.

“I’m a fucking dumbass.” you groaned, your hands coming up to your head as you pondered your next move.

“There’s no chance that you’ll believe this was all just one practical joke that I’ve been playing to test how quickly you could turn up at my place with wine?” You looked up hopefully at Emily, and she returned with a concerned look of her own, that silently communicated ‘No, I wasn’t born yesterday.’

“Worth a shot, come on in.” You opened the door wider for Emily and grabbed a second glass from your kitchen to share the wine before she could start her interrogation.

“So,” she prompted as soon as you returned to the couch, and you sighed heavily as you nodded and began.

“I married Reid in Vegas.”

“Yes, I got that from the text, what I didn’t get was why, what, when, where, who, and how! Question words, Y/N, important information if you please.” You chuckled at Emily’s tone, and you melted a little into your couch. Just like with Penelope, letting others know had comforted you. You’d never been one to bottle up your emotions, and you couldn’t exactly tell Spencer how you felt about him, so your dearest FBI-assigned best friends were a welcome compromise.

“You promise not to tell anyone? Penelope knows, and so does Rossi, but no one else does. Well maybe someone else but I don’t know who that someone is - long story.” You rambled, still aware of the promise you’d made with Spencer, and knowing that you’d actually broken it twice now.

“Scouts honor, now get on with it.”

“You were never a scout.”

“That’s beside the point, Y/N, now spill!”

“Do you remember when we finished the case in Vegas last weekend, and we all wanted nothing more than to go home, but the jet was landed?” A small nod encourages you to continue. “Well, Reid offered to show me this bar that he thought I’d enjoy, and honestly, I’d had a tense phone call with my mom and was feeling a bit crappy, so I thought a drink wouldn’t hurt.”

“A drink might get you married though.” You glared at her at the interruption, and she held her hands up in surrender as you continued.

“The bar was amazing, and he noticed I was feeling down, and I don’t know, he just has this way of making me feel calm and fully together. I was a mess earlier that day, but with like one short conversation, he kind of turned my mood entirely around.” You flushed then and decided to ignore Emily’s next interjection.

“Oh god…”

“Apparently after that, we went to a casino or another bar or something, but honestly, I drank so much I don’t remember any of that. But at some point, we bought a very expensive engagement ring, made our way to the Bureau for Wedding Licences and then a chapel and now we’re legally married.” You tried to end your story there, but Emily wasn’t having that.

“No, you’re not stopping there. You said you kissed, and you ruined everything, and you mentioned a wedding night in that text, do not shortchange me now, Y/L/N. Wait, should I be calling you Reid now?” She grinned at the flush that coated your entire body with that, and you buried your head in your pillows.

“Okay, okay. Well, we’re trying to figure out who the witnesses to our wedding were. We know that two team members were there, and Penelope was one of them, but Spencer doesn’t know that yet. Again, another long story.” You let your words sink in as you realize the tangled mess you’d spun for yourself in the last week.

“We spent some time researching our options on Saturday night, to see if we could get our memories to come back and I might not have left until a couple hours ago?”

“Y/N! You’ve been banging Reid for the last three days?”

“No! No, nothing like that, we didn’t- well, we did just not at his house, but also I don’t think you want to hear about that.” You spilled all the details about your last few days with Reid, his touches, his care, the dates you’d been on, the way you’d wrapped yourself around each other in your sleep, but still woken up to an empty bed, all the way up to that fateful kiss and your stupid reaction.

“So there, I’ve ruined it.” Emily looked at you pityingly and started to say something when your doorbell rang a second time.

“That’s reinforcements,” Emily said, standing and moving to greet the newcomer herself. You were relieved when Penelope Garcia came marching through the door, ice cream in hand and mouth already moving.

“Have no fear, your guardian angel is here. Emily texted me en route and I disentangled myself from my plans with a now very suspicious Derek Morgan to race over here. I think I managed to throw him off the scent by mentioning my ukelele lessons with Sam though, he always kinda glazes over whenever I go into heavy details about that.” She perches herself on the couch beside you and starts organizing things on the table, pulling out three tubs of ice cream and locating adequate spoons in the drawer.

“Pen, you didn’t have to do all this…”

“Yes, I did. Emily tell her I did. I need all the details that you suddenly remembered Y/N or I’m going to go crazy, and let me tell you, I am not an effective tech analyst when my mind is all aflutter with wonder.” You smiled awkwardly at the situation. You’d glossed over the details of your wedding night with Emily, going no further than insinuating that you’d had sex, but now the pressure was on.

“We just want to help you, Y/N. And we’re morbidly curious.” Emily joined in. Both of their eyes were trained on you in a hopeful expression, leaving the ball firmly in your court as you fought down the embarrassment rising from the back of your throat.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath.

“I think it was the best sex I’ve ever had in my life,” was all you managed to squeak out before they were reacting, asking twenty questions each in the space of a minute as your body both caught fire at the memory and shrunk down to the size of an ant at the attentions.

“Calm down, calm down, I’ll tell you more but you have to calm down.” They stilled themselves and bit their tongue, and you continued.

“Well I don’t want to get into the, uh, specific details, but let’s just say that he’s very good at putting theory into practice. That or he’s actually very experienced in sex and nobody ever realized, because the things he was doing were like, expert-level maneuvers. I didn’t think I was that flexible until he was hitting from-”

“OKAY not that much detail, this is still Reid we’re talking about.”

“Sorry,” you giggled sheepishly and decided to spare them all the details. “All I’ll say is that we both finished multiple times. And I might have stupidly let him finish inside of me.”

“Y/N, you should know better! Safe sex is really important, especially if you’re fucking in a hotel room in Vegas.” Emily half-chastised you, but you could hear the humor in her voice and just rolled your eyes.

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t exactly having sex with a stranger, I was having sex with my husband.” That got you a teasing cooing from the two women and you buried your face in your hands again.

“So he’s your husband now, is he? How long have you been married? Like three days?”

“Five. Fuck, we’re running out of time.” The length of time that had elapsed since you’d walked down the aisle shocked you as soon as you’d acknowledged it, and you downed your glass of wine as your brain ran rampant.

“Rossi said that if we didn’t tell everyone in a week, he’d do it for us so we didn’t lose our jobs, and we need to file for an annulment soon so we don’t have to get a divorce but there’s like… a one week window, and it’s already been five days. Shit. shit shit shit shit.”

“Hold on, Y/N, you said he kissed you earlier today, right? I wouldn’t exactly recommend getting married and then dating your partner, but it sounds like you both at least like each other enough to pursue this relationship, why would you need an annulment?” Emily’s confusion only served to remind you of the reason they were both here in the first place.

“That’s the problem. I think he thinks I don’t like him like that. And it’s totally my fault that he thinks that, because when he kissed me I didn’t react well and then he just left, and I think I ruined everything.”

“Define not reacting well,” Emily probed further.

“I pushed him away and slammed the door in his face. But that was only because I remembered everything that happened between us on our wedding night, and remembering the most satisfying experience of your entire existence while face-to-face with the man who you’d hitherto never thought capable of that, and having it occur in like 0.02 of a second is a paralyzing experience.”

“Oh my god, you’re an idiot,” Penelope whispered from her side of the couch and you nodded heartily in agreement.

“And what, he just left?” Emily asked again, tone incredulous with all the information she was receiving.

“Well when I’d had my moment and realized what I’d done, I opened the door again and he wasn’t there. And that was only like a minute later. He messaged me this after he left.” You grabbed your phone and opened it up, showing the girls the message and noting their winces in reaction to his words.

“It’s bad, right?”

“No! No, this is salvageable! You just have to… be brave?” Penelope didn’t seem to believe her own words as you pulled your phone back and poured yourself another glass, ready to drown your sorrows once again. Emily was a little more confident.

“Okay. Here’s what you do. I’m going to talk to Rossi for you tomorrow morning at work, get him to hold off on his big reveal while you go and explain everything to Spencer. How does that sound?”

“That sounds doable, I guess.” You sniffled a little, rereading the text having made your emotions jump back up to the surface again as you fought off tears.

“Brilliant. And then you can stay married and continue having wonderful sex, and make some genius babies and make me their godmother.” You threw a pillow at Penelope that she was just too slow to catch, and filled the rest of your evening with wine, ice cream, and good company.

–X–

Emily sends you a thumbs-up text after she talks to Rossi the next morning, and a weight falls off your shoulder. One step down, one to go right?

You’d arrived at work probably a little bit too early, having spent the night tossing and turning and playing every possible outcome in your mind over and over again. It had been half an hour before the next person turned up, and Hotch had only given you a confused half-nod in greeting before secluding himself in his office. Rossi had been the next to arrive, about twenty minutes later, and he too had questioned your presence but not in so many words.

“Early morning, Y/N? Settling into new routines in your newly-wed life, are we?” You’d stuttered out an answer but he was halfway up the stairs by the time you finished, obviously meaning the comment to be rhetorical.

Morgan, Emily, and JJ were all next, showing up only a few minutes before your shift officially started, but there was no sign of Reid, and you were running out of time - and privacy - to talk to him.

Then at 9 sharp the elevator doors opened, and from your seat at your desk, you watched him step out, feeling your tongue grow thick and your heart beat faster as he made his way into the office. This wasn’t how you were supposed to feel, this was cartoonish like a teenage boy in a brat pack movie watching the hottest girl in the school walk down a corridor. This was Spencer, your husband, and your best friend, and here you were feeling giggly and shy.

You almost felt like texting Emily back, telling her if you started giggling and twirling your hair, to take you out back and put you out of your misery.

He didn’t make eye contact with you as he settled into his morning routine, pulling off his scarf, putting his bag away, and then moving to the kitchen to fill up on his morning coffee. You did your best to covertly follow him, trying not to alert the others to your heart eyes as you looked at him and forgot everyone else.

“Spencer, can we talk?” You blocked off the entry to the kitchen as he spun around to face you, a bittersweet smile playing on his lips.

“Sure, Y/N, what’s up?” His voice didn’t betray any of his emotions, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes, and you could tell you’d hurt him the day before. You took a deep breath and walked closer to him as he continued making his coffee, again refusing to look you in the eyes as he continued as normal.

“It’s about yesterday-”

“We probably shouldn’t talk about this here, right?” He cut you off in a whisper, his voice sending shivers down your spine as you gripped the countertop beside him for support. You’d gotten closer than you expected at first, somehow magnetically drawn to him, your body language just as open to him as he was closed to you.

“I think we need to, Spence. I’m sorry, I panicked.”

“No, it’s my fault, I shouldn’t have done that-”

“Spencer I got my memory back.” His eyes widened and he blossomed in front of you again, attention entirely on you now as he took in your words.

“You did?”

“Partially, only the… Only the memories of your hotel room.” His eyes darkened in understanding, moving unconsciously closer to you, placing a hand next to yours on the counter as he effectively trapped your body in.

“Oh. Those memories.”

“Yeah. So you can see why I was a bit distracted.” He nodded at your words, but he was still coming closer to you now. Your body felt weak underneath you, entirely reacting to his closeness, the warmth rolling off his body, the electricity sparking between you despite him not touching you anywhere.

“Distracted?” His eyes darted to your lips as he grew closer, and your legs chose that exact second to give in underneath you.

Your knees hit the ground uncomfortably, as he reacted to your sudden movement, trying to grab you and pull you up, but only managing to grab the hand that was already holding the counter above you, awkwardly twisting and pinning your arm up.

“Oh my god. Oh my god, I’m sorry, I think… I think I should go,” you were face to face with his crotch, and looking up at him in that position was certainly giving you unwholesome thoughts. He jumped back as you scrambled out from underneath him, begging whatever god was out there that none of the profilers you worked with would question the dazed state that would follow you for the rest of the day.

–X–

Despite your need to straighten things out with Spencer, you’d avoided him for the rest of the day, and, having been called out on a case, you spent the better part of the week avoiding him as well. After literally falling for him, you’d decided that maybe in your newly weakened lovesick stage, it was best for everyone on the team that you try to stay as clear-headed as possible.

Not everyone on the team, though, agreed. He’d trailed after you like a lost puppy for days now, and you wanted nothing more than to give in and throw yourself in his arms. But there was a murderer on the loose and you needed to give your entire attention to it.

He’d tried multiple times to get you to help him with some work, suggesting that you go through some files together, or check out one of the witnesses together, much to your discomfort. Luckily, Hotch had picked up on some of the discomfort between the two of you and had kept you somewhat apart, not asking questions.

But the last night on the case, he’d cornered you, and you had to work twice as hard to extricate yourself from the situation.

“Y/N, why are you avoiding me?” He’d caught you alone in the hotel lobby, pulling you into a dark corner without much foot traffic to confront you. “Is it because of the kiss? Because the way you talked about getting your memories back the other day made me think we were okay about that again, but if we’re not then I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable.”

“It’s not the kiss, Spence, and we really shouldn’t be talking about this here.” You tried to turn and leave, but he grabbed your elbow and spun you back into him, bodies pressed flush up against each other now.

“Spencer let go, someone could see us.” Even you knew your voice sounded half-hearted, not really wanting him to stop touching you at all.

“If it’s not the kiss, then why are you acting like I don’t exist?” His face was close again, and you felt your body reacting the same way it had done in the staff kitchen. Your knees went weak again, but he was prepared this time, holding you up in his arms, gently maneuvering you so you were pinned against the wall.

“Is this it?” He asked, letting his hands trail over your body as you whimpered under his touch. “Your reactions?”

Your brain was empty of a response, so you just held still, desperate to see what he would do or say next.

“You know, the deadline on our annulment has passed. It’s been over a week now,” he said, his forehead resting on yours as he brought his hips ever closer.

You were the one that gave in first, pushing your head up to capture his lips in a crushing kiss, needing him the way you needed water, food, and sleep. You’d deprived yourself for so long, and now you were hungry, ravenous, and he was the same. Your lips opened, and soon his tongue was snaking in, caressing you in ways both familiar and new, and your entire body heated up to its boiling point.

You moaned under his touch as his hands wandered, silently begging for more of him. Your brain only kicked back into gear when you registered the sound of voices about to turn the corner. Quickly pushing him off, you pulled yourself together just as JJ and Morgan found you there.

“Y/N, Reid, Garcia got a positive ID on our unsub, we’re about to go SWAT his house, get your gear ready.”

Either you were very good at masking your emotions and the physical outburst you’d just shared, or Morgan was just too caught up in getting his job done that he didn’t look too closely at the way Reid’s tie was half undone, your lips were pink and swollen and that both of you were breathing abnormally. Whichever it was, you were just thankful that neither of them questioned you as you all left to go and do your job.

–X–

To your detriment, you’d avoided him on the jet back as well, choosing to wrap a blanket around yourself and sit in a single seat at the end of the plane rather than risk his hands on you again like last time. You already couldn’t be trusted around him, and you wanted to take no risks with everyone else present.

He’d sat in your line of vision purposefully though, making eye contact every now and then to remind you that he was still watching you. You’d feigned exhaustion and pretended to sleep in the end, despite the flight duration only being a measly two hours. He’d let you exit the plane alone though, and said a general goodbye to the team upon landing, giving you a second look and wave before taking himself home.

The ball was firmly in your court.

“What the hell was all that?” Emily whispered in your ear as you both watched him leave alone. “What happened to the plan?” You smiled awkwardly, not wanting to admit how fucking horny the man made you feel, and how it was affecting your work performance so badly that avoiding him was the only way to keep your job.

“We had the talk, everything’s fine.”

“The two of you aren’t walking out of here hand in hand, so obviously everything is not fine, Penelope, tell me I’m wrong.” The other woman had stumbled into the bullpen upon landing and Emily had immediately drawn her into your hushed conversation as soon as Morgan had made to go home as well.

“What’s going on, hot stuff, I thought you’d be enjoying every second of your marital bliss by now.”

“He’s too distracting.” You whisper shouted at him. “He kissed me again last night and I almost let him take me in the lobby. And Morgan and JJ almost caught us, so yeah, he’s too distracting.”

“Oh god, you’re horny for Reid.” Emily laughed slightly at the implication as if it had just dawned on her and you hadn’t had an entire conversation where you fawned about how good in bed he was.

“Yes, I’m horny for Reid, okay, now please stop laughing, I’m in pain.”

“Well you know there’s only one solution, right?” Penelope said as if it were clear as day. “You need to go have sex with him again. See if you can be normal with him when you’re not so pent up.”

“I don’t know, Pen….” You were still staring at the elevator doors, even after it had been so long since he’d left.

“What is there to not know? You like him, he likes you, you’re married. Like you said before, it’s not like you’re having sex with a stranger, he’s your husband.” Having your words thrown back in your face gave you the boost of confidence that you needed, and you sprang from your chair.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Emily repeated and you looked back down at the two women.

“Okay, I’m gonna… I’m gonna go seduce my husband, I guess?” You turned on your heel and left, marching out to the sounds of whoops and cheers from the two women behind you.

🏷️ @w-windyy @multifandom-on-the-side @reidandhotchsgirl @babybluecakes @hugyourlungs @prentissesredtanktop @reidscaffeine @bethanyhaas01 @average-sunflower @academiareid @sailortongue @daddy-dotcom @high-functioning-cosplayer @anniewhalelover @abbyshmaby @isabel-ffl-xoxo @sujan39 @frxcless @bluestuesday @busy-buzzing @breadbrobin @maxinehufflepuffprincess @l0v3cam @booksandwonderlands @myescapefromthislife @ferrjulie @scoobydoopoo @aelinismyqueen @littlesingingbean @jamiemuscatosslut @xohoneybun @anchovy89freya @dysphoricsanity @ghostheartbeat @casss2111 @rebloggiest-reblogger @wishyoudaskme @imawhoreforu @academiacoffeelover @softservepunk @andiebeaword @r-3dlips @wakaladjarin @ratbastardchild @mcira @danika1994 @stargurl99 @whovianwholikesgirls @its-not-too-late-for-coffee

[romanarose]

The Bikeriders as a metaphor for bisexuality

Now I ain't saying this was intentional because I'm pretty sure it's not but this is how I read the struggle between Johnny and Kathy for Benny just feels like Benny's internal struggle between homosexuality and heteosexuality, how neither of it fits him so he was always walking that line.

For the record Im speaking in terms of binary gender because this is just a simple movie theory. I am well aware of other genders but this is just how I see it.

Spoilers below

Kathy tried to get him to leave, he wouln't do it. It's like he wouldn't let go of that same/sex attraction, the queerness, the subversive side of him.

Johnny never tried to get him to leave Kathy for him, but his pull comes in the two times he tried to get Benny to take over the club. Benny refused, because that full commitment to the club, the lifestyle, would be rejecting the other side of him.

He didn't want to choose. he wanted to just be himself. I think his happiness came in accepting that.

Benny didnt give up riding because Kathy made him. He gave it up because Johnny was dead and that broke him. He was ready to settle down. Benny didn't choose "being straight", I think in his crying, his finally crying he and Kathy new what Johnny was to him and I think Benny accepted who he was. Then he was happy with Kathy, because he did love her. I think she was wrong that he didn't miss it. I think he did. But I think he misses it in a sense that we as people will always long for the past.

Another way I see it is that yes, he's happy. Yes he has a good life. But Maybe he was always going to end up with Kathy as the "settling down". Johnny didn't equal settling down. I think a lot of times, especially back then, homosexuality was viewed as a phase, like the trope of college girls going through a "gay phase" or concepts of homoerotic military men secluded from women. That its something you do for a while then you "grow out of it." But thats not how it really works. I stand by that Benny loves Kathy and is happy at the end.

He smiles, which is rare for his character. He's smiling when Kathy isn't looking, so he's not performing for anyone.

But I think when you look at it in the context of the time, she was the option if he wanted to settle down. That, as bisexual people, maybe you have some crazy times in college but then you find someone in a heterosexual relationship and settle and try to put that behind you. It doesn't mean he's not happy, as bisexual people in straightpassing relationships are happy. It just means, when the motercycle sounds echo for him, he still thinks about the past. the what if.

And thats just a human thing to do.

I saw The Bikeriders on Saturday and then twice, yes twice today (sunday). I was bawling at the end the last two times when the bisexual metaphore theory came to me. I read Benny as bi right away.

Johnny is said to have gotten his inspiration from Marlon Brando. Bando has talked about being bisexual. Another famous name and face of Brando's era was James Dean. Although Dean was more a car guy in the end, he was deffinetly into motercycles. Dean's sexuality is speculated but many close friends say he was bisexual.

I think it would be almost impossible not to have homoerotic subtext with this sort of thing if the movie was true to inspirations of the era. I don't know how you can watch it and think benny and Johnny dont want each other.

Personally, I don't think Johnny was bi, I think he was gay. I think because of how little emphasis on his wife there was, how she never quite seemed to get him, not in the way Benny got him, I think he was gay. I think he married and had kids because thats what you did.

Anyway all this to say I fucking love this movie. At first watch I wasn't a fan of Austin butlers performance but now I get it. Wow. I get it

I know its not anyone intention making the movie for it to be a metaphore for bisexuality but I can just see it see clearly.

This came out during pride month for a reason

[trinoxtrinox]

Abbeyofcyn Colour in your style

Painting the lineart for this was really fun, and I really enjoyed doing it, even if I feel like I bit a bit more than I could chew at first, what with me wanting to do two different light sources XD

I also wanted to colour the lineart of this, however the results that I got aren't that good, so I'll be uploading two pieces, one without the lineart painted (the one I like more), and the one with the coloured lineart. Hope you like it everyone and @abbeyofcyn

Ok, now that the art is done, I have a lot to say about how I chose to color everything, but that could get long so I'll leave all of that under a read more, expand at your own risk XD

Allright, so first of all, a detail that I'm not sure many people will be able to catch in the first place. The flowers, I colored them in a specific way, because each of them represents a different person.

In here I added the flowers to represent each of the beings present on the art, Red for Raph, Light Blue for Leo, Purple for Donnie, Orange for Mickey, Dark blue for F!Leo, and finally Pink for the Krang; because the latest might not be present literally, but the sky and pink light clearly indicate that they're still a presence to be felt in the world.

In here we have the four turtles again, with the flowers being their respective colors. However, since all but one of them are cut, I chose to color them in what I believe the order they died in the bad future is. First is Raph, I doubt he'd let anyone die before him, so the single corner of a red petal goes to him, then Donnie goes next, hence why a petal and a bit of the center is the only thing that can be seen of him; and now we come to the first scene of the movie, which makes it so that Mikey is the next flower that's cut off, and finally Leo gets the only not cutt off flower, because he's still living here.

This are the last patch of flowers, and the reason why I colored them that way is because each of them represent a different person that's important for the turtles. The Green represent April's Ninpo, I wanted to add her and ther ninpo was the only way I could think of, and on the same vein, the white and black next to her are Splinter when he's on his Ninpo state at their final fight against Shredder. Below them there's the gray and sorta orange flowers, this time they both represent Splinter in his normal form, and yes I know I put him twice in there, he's their father, he deserves it XD

Finally there's the dark brown and gray flowers, these one represent Cassandra Jones and Cassey Junior, you can't argue that they end up being pretty important to the turtles, the first one helped them in the fight against Shredder, and the second one literally kickstarted the movie XD

Next thing to discuss is why I chose to have two different lightning sources and why they are what they are.

First is the Krang sky at the front, I chose this because I got inspired by this idea for the AU behind this lineart from Abbeyofcyn and wanted to continue said AU idea. My take and continuation is that even after the Magic Tie Portal that Mickey did to send Casey Jr. to the past exploded and send the Krang at the battlefield away (and considering how big the battlefield it was, it most likely killed or pushed away every single Krang at New York) and F!Leo got the Tots!Turtles, there were still enough living Krang around the world that are still ravaging the world, this time more out of spite than anything since they know the won and simply want to kick down a dead horse. F!Leo is going in that direction because he's aware that there are Krang still left, and the sad reality is that he can't shield the Tots!Turtles forever, but at least he should be able to train them and teach them everything he can, while also giving them the chance to have a childhood as well, similar to Casey Jr. but more chill.

F!Leo and Tots!Raph are the only ones facing the Krang light, and that's on purpose, the former because obviously he'll be the main force against the remnants of the Krang that are still on Earth, and the latter because no matter the form, Raph will always want to protect his siblings, and he ain't afraid to punch a few f them in the face to do so. Tots!Mikey meanwhile is in the backpack, being shielded from the Krang light, with it barely reaching him, and again, that's on purpose, everyone will want to protect him since he's the youngest, and the fact that he also will become the strongest Mystical Warrior the world will ever see again, and so F!Leo will try to teach him whatever he knows about Ninpo and the Mystic Powers, doing his best to shield him from the horrors of the Krang so that he can focus on learning Mystical Powers.

Tots!Leo and Tots!Donnie are giving their back to the Krang light, but that's not because they'll ignore the menace they represent, but rather because they're focusing on what's more important to them at the moment, for Tots!Leo is his twin brother and the shenanigans/drama he can get with him, while for Tots!Donnie is his curiosity and need to learn about the world around him (Also he's autistic and likes rocks, fight me XD). Leo here is shielding Donnie from the Krang's light, agan made on purpose, because he loves his twin too much and wants to protect him from the horrors, while also pulling his rope to bring him back to the present; Donnie meanwhile only has a little bit of Krang light on him, which is their looming threat that they represent for a great while, however they aren't the biggest thing occuping his mind, and thanks to his twin, he's able to not focus on them for a while to concentrate on more things that'll help everyone in the future; which brings me to...

The yellow light, which comes from the sun that's behind them, and considering how it's a yellow and not an orange one, the current time is morning and it's Dawn, the rise of a new day, new begginings and start for a new hope. It might seem like they're walking away from the light and into the Krang's side, however with this idea I had it's less that they're getting further away from the light, but rather bringing the light with them, illuminating everyone's path and pushing back against the Krang.

As you can see, everyone is bathed in the sun's light glow, however Tots!Donnie, Tots!Raph and Tots!Leo are the ones that are literally bathed in it, while F!Leo has his legs covered in it and Tots!Mikey only has sunlight on his head. Once again this is all on purpose, and I'll explain everyone's light position now :3

Tots!Raph, The sunlight is mostly on his shell, tail and arms, which is because he'll be in charge of protecting everyone's uture, and that sadly also means that he'll be bearing the heaviest burden out of his brothers, but that'll also means that when the burden is eventually lifted, he'll be the one that looks forwards the most.

F!Leo's future is uncertain, the sunlight covers only his legs completly because even if he's the guiding light of everyone's future, and no matter how much light he has on his back, shell, legs and arms; he's not covered in any of it beyond his role as a guide, so still uncertainty envelops him.

Tots!Mikey is literally being carried in a bag to the future, which again is because he's the youngest and the strongest mystical warior out of them, but he's also somewhat of a backup plan, his role will be less to guide anyone to the bright future and more ensure that no one gets left behind under the looming threat of the Krang, hence why he only has the sunlight on his face and he's not covered in it like his brothers.

Tots!Leo and Tots!donnie, the disaster twins, they both are encased in light because both of them will help create the brightest future as well, however Donnie is covering a half of Leo, not letting him be truly fully under the sunlight, and again, that's because while he protects his twin from the Krang, Leo is sacrificing part of his abilities to guide everyone else but his brother. Donnie meanwhile is literally encased in light, his face fully iluminated, and that's because with his smarts and creativity, he'll be the biggest reason that a brighter future will be created for Earth, his inventions carrying everyone towards it.

Finally, why I started with dry grass on the foreground and ended with green grass at the mountains on the horizon, and that's because even with their uncertain future, even though they are the guiding light that'll bring a new brighter future to the world, that doesn't mean that the world is at such a critical state that they literally can't be saved. There are still people out there, living in hiding, no matter how it seems from the start point, there's still life out there.

And that's all I wanted to say about how I painted it and why I did so, I had so much I wanted to say and, to anyone who bothers to read all of this, thanks for doing so, I put way too much thoughts into this ambitious for me painting, and I loved writing all of this down as well. See y'all in the future n.n

[ltleflrt]

I am STUCK on Veilguard.

I can't choose between Emmrich and Lucanis. I am currently sitting here with the choice to commit or not commit with Emmrich on my screen, and I've been scrolling tumblr, playing neko atsume, making myself breakfast, scrolling tiktok, answering my ao3 comments... anything but making a decision. This decision has been up on my screen for oh, about an hour. And I've been waffling for days. Last night I even started both romances just to see if one of their scenes made me go "oh that one for sure", but nope. Nope. I am more torn than ever.

I didn't struggle this hard choosing between Anders and Fenris, and that was a difficult choice. I think what makes the difference here though is the length of the game and how likely I think I am to replay it. The first time I played DA2, I romanced Merrill, and I knew I was going to replay it, and it's a comparatively short game, so my thirst for more made me replay it several times. (15 times in a row to be exact. Still wasn't enough, and then my husband introduced me to the concept of fanfiction and signed me up for FFNet lol). Knowing that I'd be back again soon made it easy to just pick one and go. (I don't remember who I picked. After Merrill, I just kept switching back and forth between Anders and Fenris every replay, and on my most recent one last year I installed the poly mod and played it twice in a row while romancing them at the same time. Seriously, I love that fucking game so much lol).

But while I'm thoroughly enjoying Veilguard, more than I'd expected to, it's a very long game in comparison, and it's not quite compelling enough for me to go "oh yeah, I'm going to immediately start over as soon as the credits are done rolling." I mean, I'm aware I may change my mind once I've actually finished it for the first time, but every game I've obsessively replayed, I knew I would be obsessively replaying it before the halfway point.

So yeah, I'm sitting here typing up this post instead of checking yes or no on Emmrich's romance, because I CANNOT DECIIIIIIIIDE.

*refreshes Nexus and prays for a poly mod*

[two-white-butterflies]

parallel lines | d. targaryen | part four

Description: An ordinary middle school teacher moves to a desolate town with her fiancee. After suffering episodes of vivid nightmares, she realizes that his uncle looks exactly like the man in her dreams.

Pairings: daemon targaryen/reader, aemond targaryen/reader

Trope: Reincarnation

series masterlist |

"I don't pray for revival, I'm already living in one."

Daemon's body was mere centimeters away from yours, he was looking at you with those puppy eyes - praying to the gods that you'd remember. Aemond almost sees red.

He calls out to you.

"Yes?" you raised your eyebrows, he takes a mammoth stride in your direction, creating an empty space between you and Daemon. "Everything alright?" you inquired, seeing that pout on his lips.

He shakes his head, reaching for the beer on the coffee table. "Yep," he popped his lips, glaring at his uncle's direction. He did love you to an extent, but he could never love you more than Alys.

"We were having an interesting conversation about zombies," Daemon referenced and you responded with a giggle. Aemond huffed, clearly uncomfortable. "I thought you were scared of zombies?" he tried to play it off with a chuckle.

You leaned closer to his touch.

The image of a man covered in blood never boded well with your sensitive stomach. "I still am - but Daemon has a strange way of making them funny." you responded, and he pretended to look away. "Does that mean that you'll watch 'the Sadness' with me?" he narrowed his eyes and you quickly shook your head.

"Now you're just trying to scare me on purpose," you smiled and he pressed a kiss to your cheek, aware that Daemon was a spectator. Aemond thought for a moment that he had finally won. He's taken you with avarice before, and he's not afraid to do it twice.

You shake the ice on your empty cup.

"I'll grab more drinks, do you want any?" you offer the men and Daemon nods his head. "I'll take a pornstar martini, you know how I like it." he winked, referencing another joke that you had prior to Aemond joining the conversation. "You're getting me into trouble," you jested and he laughed.

"Make it fast," he teased.

"Don't make this complicated, kepus. You might regret it." he warns.

Something in Daemon's subconscious shifts. How long has it been since they last fought? A thousand years. One would almost forget the rabidness that a desperate man possessed.

"The greatest swordsman killed by his own nephew." Aemond mocked, taking a swig of his beer. "I wasn't wearing a sword, and it wasn't much of a fight if your bitch wasn't playing fair." Daemon gritted his teeth.

Aemond smirks, taking the upper hand.

"Calm down," Aemond antagonized.

"What do you want from her?" Daemon quickly interrogated. Everyone knew that you were his, since the moment you met in the Stepstones - you came back to Harrenhal as a claimed woman. Even after his marriage to Lady Laena, he always came back to you. A bastard, loving him better than any trueborn woman. "She doesn't know who you are, she loves me." Aemond emphasized.

And it pained Daemon to see that he was right.

"She's bound to remember," Daemon retorted.

"You are right, but she'll still choose me." he smirked.

"Even when she remembers the whole truth?" Daemon challenged.

Aemond's eye softens, wholly unsure. He remembers what he's done to you - those dark nights in your sister's castle. Hands tied together, eyes flowing with tears and begging for death. No, he was sure that if you remembered - you'd leave him; you'd hate him forever, and he'll be alone once more. He decides to shift the conversation, for now. Until he finds a permanent solution for your memories.

"You were lucky to have been spared before the capture. You couldn't have saved her from me." Aemond mumbles, waiting until the gears click and Daemon realizes the full truth. "You didn't kill her?" Daemon's eyes narrowed and Aemond nods smugly. "What did you do?" Daemon inquires, scanning the room for allies.

"I gave your wife an heir, something you couldn't provide." he whispered and Daemon lifts his fist, striking the man on his face. Aemond falters from the shear force, but quickly regains his strength. Daemon lifts his fist again, but Laenor prevents him this time. "Daemon," his friend breathed - running across the room to stop this circus.

"You cannot change the past." Aemond lifted his chin. "You should've seen her, alas that memory is mine alone." he smirked, seeing Laenor hold Daemon with all of his might. The man was struggling to hold his friend back, as Daemon was a trained soldier - strong and big.

"You told us that murder was forbidden in this world, but this house has a garden of fifty-hectares. I could bury you and I know for a fact that the police wouldn't dare search." Daemon threatened, the atmosphere suddenly grew thick.

Laenor and Aemond knew that he wouldn't be making this threats if they weren't promises. "Hide me like you've hidden our family's dirt?" Aemond antagonized further. "If you're going to make him mad, I'm not going to hold him back." Laenor warned, the boy ignores him.

"Be careful with your words, Aemond. Your confession will lead you to a place with no return." Daemon warned, a part of his heart still feeling for his young nephew.

It wasn't always this way.

(December 25, 2003)

Daemon could hear his nephews cry in the other room. "Everything alright?" he asks his brother's wife, her hair was disheveled and the entire house was out of place.

"Viserys and Aemond had a fight, I don't think that boy will ever like his father again." she shook her head. A sigh escapes his mouth. "Is there anything I can do to help? I should've been here yesterday but there wasn't any flights until Yule morning." Daemon reasoned, handing his sister-in-law the gifts for the children.

"Merry Christmas, Daemon." Alicent greeted weakly. "Talk to Aemond for me, please. You know how much the boy adores you." she pleaded, the older man nodded. "Of course."

Aemond was sobbing loudly, covered by his pillows and sheets of duvet. "Byka zaldrīzes?" his uncle called out, taking a cautious step towards the bed. "Go away." Aemond mumbled.

"What happened?" Daemon ignored, settling down on the mattress. "Da' got mad at him for opening the gifts too early." Aegon responded, taking a sip of his eggnog - he's probably too young to be drinking that. "It's Christmas?" Daemon frowned.

He lifts the pillows off Aemond's body - exposing his sweaty body. "I got all of you gifts, they're with Mum." he pokes his nephew. "Maybe we can go out later, enjoy the funfair." Daemon offered.

"I want to stay at home." Aemond huffed.

"We can stay at home," Daemon wiped the boy's sweat with his handkerchief. He reminds him so much of himself.

next chapter>>

[an-au-blog]

Kissing booth but its zosan

I'll just assume you're not talking about the movie, (if I'm wrong, correct me, I can work with that too... i think) to which I will say: yes. I agree.

I mean listen -

Vivi started a fundraiser for charity and she decided that it'd be fun if they made it in a more festive manner. To which Sanji is happy to help because, how could he say no to a beautiful lady in need? Zoro on the other hand did not want to go but Nami blackmailed him into doing this "eentsy weetsy" favor for her girlfriend. (He still owes her money.)

Luffy, Zoro and Franky help with carrying the heavy things. Usopp and Franky do the lights and music set-up. Sanji does cooks the food and the rest help with decorations and setting up different attractions.

Once the event began, they put Franky and Robin in the haunted house, Book has a performance, Luffy is let to run around because he can't stay in one place and so on everyone is at attractions. Sanji thought he was going to be at the food stands, but then Nami drags him aside to an empty standalone booth. What was even more confusing was that Zoro also had one right next to his.

Nami as if talking to toddlers: You guys are gonna be on kissing booth duty, isn't that exciting?!

Zoro: Wtf? No, I'm not doing that.

Nami, taking out her phone: Let's see, January - 50, February - 25, Match... wow 140 that's a lot, huh? Anyways, April -

Zoro: Okay, okay I get it.

Zoro got a line of beautiful girls, some young some old, but his attitude is the same for all of them. Irritation with slight boredom. Sanji on the other hand, had only a handful of women. Most were Okamas and his line was still twice smaller than Zoro's.

Sanji agrees because he would live to kiss pretty ladies. He doesn't need convincing, but Nami throws in a "I'm putting the two most handsome boys on these stands after all" just to ensure Sanji stays.

She also ended up giving them a quota to fulfill.

In their "hygiene break", Sanji grabs him by the collar and gets real close to his face.

Sanji: You think you're all that just because you got more ladies? Huh?

Zoro smiling for the first time since the festival started: Are you jealous of them, cook? Of you want a kiss, you gotta pay me first.

Sanji becomes furious and starts shouting at him but then a lady from the ones waiting speaks up.

Woman: Um, actually, I'd pay to see you two kiss.

Sanji: ...

Sanji: Pardon? Je ne comprends pas. ("I don't understand" in french)

Zoro looks at the woman: You have the money?

Woman: Yes.

And she put the money in the slot.

Zoro smiles again and shrugs: Welp, money's money. Works for me.

He grabs Sanji by the back of the neck and plants a kiss on his lips. It was short and as if out of spite. Not in a bad way. Im fact Sanji was surprised how much "not in a bad way" it was. His lips were soft and soaked in long overdue passion. He couldn't dare say it was in a good way though, he still had some pride to admit it.

Still, he was frozen in place.

Another "client" raised their hand in the air holding money: I want the same thing, please!

Zoro nodded and kissed Sanji again, ironically enough it broke Sanji's trance-like state. He was a bit too aware of everyone's eyes on them.

Zoro, amused and absolutely sure Sanji wouldn't do it, tilts his head in the person's depreciation, he laughed: You heard the clients, so what ya gonna do love cook?

A third person from the back, throwing in three times the price: I'll pay triple for Sanji to kiss him.

Sanji furrows his brow, takes a deep breath and pulls Zoro into a deep and passionate kiss that caught everyone off guard. Once he pulled away, they were both out breath and everyone was watching them wordlessly.

After a long moment of Sanji's determined eyes looking into Zoro's pleasantly shocked ones, the cook looked back at the people and announced: That's the last show your getting from us. Booths are open again.

After that, until the end of the night qt least eight more people asked if they could make them kiss each other again, but they said "no".

Afterwards Zoro was pulled aside before they could go to the others. He got pinned to the wall, Sanji's hands leaning on either side of his head. They were sharing air, almost like when they were fighting but if felt so much more intimate this time for some reason.

Sanji: Stop me if you don't like what I'm about to do.

After which Sanji kissed Zoro again. Not being watched must have been a factor, because if Zoro guessed by his movements and kisses, Sanji was no longer holding back on him.

Zoro never stopped him.

[randomprose]

the rest is confetti

written for the satosho server weekly prompt: wedding [ao3] shoko and satoru get married—twice

When Shoko decided to get married, and when Satoru said it’s gonna be a traditional wedding because of the clan and both of their standing in Jujutsu society, she didn’t think much of it.

When Shoko let him slip that very shiny ring on her finger, she knew exactly what she was getting into.

Hell, she knew it the day Satoru finally got his shit and his words together long enough to ask her out on a date, and she knew it when she leaned it at the end of it to kiss him.

So Ieiri Shoko entered the wedding planning process and it didn’t come as a surprise to her at all that everything would be chaotic and hectic. To say the least.

What did come as a surprise, however, is how…not well Satoru is taking it all in.

While the usual planning and preparation time of a wedding as big and as important as theirs—she is well aware despite not really seeing the point of it—takes six months to a full year, theirs were all set and done in just two months. Which doesn’t really surprise her given the extent of the Gojo clan’s wealth and influence.

In two months, Shoko was ushered in and out of dress fittings and alterations, food and cake tasting, wine sampling (which she thoroughly enjoyed), flowers and decor (which she really didn’t care much for), and all other inanity such as seating arrangements and memorizing clan members. The last part was fairly easy having been in and out of the Gojo estate and having met most of Satoru’s kinsmen since becoming friends with him. It’s the other clans she couldn’t give less of a fuck about.

Everything went relatively alright and smoothly considering both hers and Satoru’s very busy schedule. And all the while Shoko was just thinking they just needed to get through all these frivolities and then they’re golden.

And then Satoru goes AWOL the day before the wedding. Shoko finds him hours later in the clan’s secret garden hiding in the gazebo she and Satoru used to lounge around with Suguru when they would visit in the summers.

“Thought I’d find you here,” Shoko says as she spots him lying on the gazebo’s cold marble floor. “What? Getting cold feet?”

“Marrying you? As if,” Satoru scoffs from his place on the floor. 

“We can still call off, you know? The wedding isn’t until tomorrow. We have time.”

“What, and have my clan and all of Jujutsu society on our ass forever?” Satoru runs a hand through his hair. He has a bitching headache and it's obvious with the way his brows are pinched. “Listen, Shoko. I need you to know that you’re the only one I’m sure about in this whole fucking circus, okay? I’m not backing out on that. And you can’t either! I'm just having an off day that's all! Don’t think you can use this as an excuse to back out!”

“I know that, doofus. And I’m not running away. I’m not the one who’s gone awol and went into hiding the day before their wedding, am I?” Shoko says as he sits by his head, putting a hand over his eyes to soothe them and rid him of his migraine. He’s in the mood for jokes even in his state and that’s a good sign. “So, what is this really about?”

“It’s just…” Satoru sighs in relief as he feels her technique course through him. The pinch in his brows is gone. “I’m sorry for putting you through all this bullshit. I know it’s not your style.”

Shoko smiles exasperatedly. Of course, Gojo Satoru will have a meltdown the day before their wedding.

“Please. Give me some credit. I knew what I was getting into the moment I allowed your dork ass to hang around me.”

“Oh, yeah? What, that you’ll one day be marrying the strongest sorcerer?”

“That you’ll one day bamboozle me into somehow agreeing to marry you, yes.”

“Oh, shut up. You beat me to the punch and asked first,” Satoru retorts, clambering up to lay his head on her lap. “You love me.”

“Of course, I do,” Shoko answers without missing a beat and they sit like that for a while with her fingers carding through his hair until the edges of his eyes have softened and his face finally relaxed.

“Man,” Satoru sighs after a while. “This whole thing kinda got away from us, huh?”

“You know I don’t care about any of this, right? But I’m okay to go along with it all because it’s you I get to meet at the end of the aisle.” Shoko looks at him, really looks at him. “Now, I’m asking you. What do you want?”

She’s asking him what he wants. Outside of him being the strongest sorcerer of their time, beyond him being the head of the Gojo clan, taking aside his duty to Jujutsu society and the world it promises to protect, Shoko is asking him what he wants as just him. As just Satoru.

“You,” Satoru answers without hesitation. He sits up so he can look at her properly. “I just want you.”

“Okay,” Shoko smiles. “Then you have me.”

In the next second, Shoko had sneaked them out of the secret backdoor hidden in the garden’s hedges and into a car. She tells Satoru to drive to the airport while she makes some calls. When Satoru asks where they’re going, Shoko just simply tells him ‘Tokyo’ and to drive fast so they can catch the next flight out. She holds up a finger in a shushing motion when Satoru tries to say something because Suguru has already picked up on the other end of the line. 

Shoko knows their friends won’t be flying out to Kyoto for the Gojo estate until tomorrow. She tells Suguru to round up the gang and to get Yaga certified to officiate then meet them at the school in two hours.

It is only when they’re sitting in the plane’s first-class cabin do Satoru says, “You know I could’ve just teleported us to Tokyo, right?”

“I know, but we gotta give the gang time to get ready. It’s lucky Utahime and Mei are on a mission in Tokyo right now. She’ll want to get presentable first at least.”

They get to Jujutsu High with just enough time for Utahime to squeeze Shoko out of her sensible turtle neck and trousers into a pantsuit at her insistence. She also does Shoko’s hair in a modest updo and puts light make-up on her. Mei-mei hands her a bouquet. 

In another room, Suguru and Yuu manage to wrangle Satoru out of his shirt and jeans into a white button-up and slacks. Kento lends him one of his suit jackets and tames his unruly white hair into a slick do.

They get married on the school grounds at dusk with Yaga blubbering through half the ceremony and his officiation and lecturing them about how they’re impulsive idiots who are a pain in his ass and that he loves them both very much.

Shoko tosses her bouquet and Utahime catches it. Satoru makes a teasing quip about it and Utahime counters by saying she’ll be walking the aisle next for when Shoko divorces him.

Their reception is held at their favorite izakaya and Satoru and Shoko cut a cake bought by Haibara from Satoru’s favorite bakery.

And then, after all the festivities and the congratulations and the ‘see you tomorrow’s, Shoko and Satoru hop on a flight back to Kyoto (because Satoru took a sip of Shoko’s sake and was feeling a little woozy to teleport) and retire to their respective rooms when they get back to the Gojo clan's estate. 

In the morning, Satoru and Shoko get married in the traditional way that was expected of people of their standing, with the Gojo clan and all the representatives of major Jujutsu clans in attendance, the Council, and everyone who’s anyone in the Jujutsu society. Their friends are among the crowd of attendees, no less excited and happy for them than they were the day before.

“Is this your first time?” Satoru asks lowly once they’re arm in arm. “Getting married, I mean.”

“Not really,” Shoko shrugs. “I’ve been married before. You?”

“Oh, same.”

“Good to know we both have some experience then.” 

“Just so you know, Mrs. Gojo-Ieiri,” Satoru says leaning down so only his wife could hear. “I would marry you a thousand times over any day, anytime, anywhere.”

“Eehh,” Shoko smirks shifting closer and bumping shoulders with her husband. “How very romantic of you, Mr. Ieiri-Gojo.”

Shoko and Satoru share knowing secretive smiles throughout the ceremony.

[officalroyalsofpierreland]

These Kids...

The Emperor's Office, Windensen, Pierreland

Louis: How is my father doing this afternoon August? Private Secretary: He is currently speaking with Their Imperial Highnesses about their...behavior... Louis: So he's not doing well. Private Secretary: That is correct sir. For your sake, I do recommend a breath mint. Your breath still smells of whiskey. Louis [mumbling]: right...thanks...

David: Honestly, It's like I can't trust you two to go anywhere. Henri, that incident with the paparazzo in Marseilles. And you Maria Aisha. I send you to Lunaria to go to a charity function for your Aunt Minnie and Uncle Nicky- Maria Aisha: Which I did. David: You weren't supposed to go to some club with Crown Prince Stephanos and be seen...all over him! For Watcher's sake Maria Aisha... Maria Aisha: Papa...I'm an adult. Who I spend my free time with- David: Is my business as long as the state pays for you. Louis: Well well well. Look at what we have here. What'd Maria Aisha do now Papa?

Maria Aisha: Nice of you to finally join the communal ass chewing Louis. Louis: Actually, I'm here to not get chewed out by Papa for once. Henri: Really? That's a shocker. Louis: Shut it Hen. Henri: Make me Lou! David: Will all of you shut up? The siblings: Yes sir.

David: Henri, you can't just push a papparazzo. Henri: In my defense, he was getting way to close to my date! David [sighing]: and as valid as that is, the optics can be spun. Try to avoid it please. as for Maria Aisha Maria Aisha: Here we go. David [sighing]: Just...keep your head down and go to uni...figure out if you and Stephanos are going to be more than just friends with benefits alright? I know you hate it when your mother brings it up, but you are held to a different standard than the boys sadly. Maria Aisha [mumbling]: Sexist establishment... David: I agree with you...but it takes a while for this place to change you know...And Louis. We need to discuss you using the family plane for these...trips you keep going on, as well as your spending on liquor.

Henri: so maybe you are getting your ass chewed today Lou! Congrats. Louis [mumbling]: Shut it Hen. David: Henri, Aisha. Your mama wants to see both of you before you leave. Maria Aisha [groaning]: Gggrrrreeeaaatttt...just great....Mama's gonna eat me alive. Henri: and that will be funny to see. David [sighing]: just both of you get out of my office please.

[Door shuts behind the twins]

Louis: About the plane- David: yes. where the fuck are you going once or twice a week? Louis: a concert... David: a concert? Louis: Yeah.... David: And the flowers? Are they for this...musician as well? Louis [mumbling]: yeah... David [sighing]: Have a seat Lou...

David: You know...I know that you and Maggie's relationship is...frankly nonexistent...does she know that you're sending her- Louis: No...if she knew, she'd probably honestly chuck the flowers...and try to get me black listed from seeing any of her concerts. David: Where you in Lunaria two nights ago? Louis: I was...she even saw me...unintentionally...I was trying to run out of there so I could get the plane back in time- David: Why didn't you stay? Louis: She said she never wanted to see me again...so I'm... attempting to honor that request. David [sighing]: Louis-

Louis: But even if its just through her music, I need to have some connection to Maggie in my life Papa... David [sighing]: Louis...I want you to really think about why you do this, between all the trips and the booze...Your Mama and I are worried- Louis: I know...I know...I'm...not drinking as much...last night was the most I've had in a while. David: Okay. As long as you are...at least aware, you are a grown adult...I won't pry into your life, as long as you keep everything under control. Now...let's discuss your trip up north.

Louis: Right...going up to Scotland for military maneuvers for the next 2 months. David: Yes. You'll be working with the Blues and Royals Cavalry unit. Louis: oh... David: In fact, you'll be working directly with Prince Magnus. Can you do that?

Louis: Yeah! I can spend a couple of months in the cold and wet with Magnus...after all up there, we're not Princes...we're soldiers. After all, what's the worst that's gonna happen.

[anabdaniels]

Cowboytober Day 19- Praising

Paring: Agent Whiskey x Female Reader

Word counting: 2.6k

Rating: 18+

Warning: The following work contains mentions of post-partum blues and frustration towards the needed mode of delivery (c-section).

Masterlist

A/N: I'm so sorry for how long this is, I got carried away by the backstory. This can be read as the part two of Flufftober Day 19.

If you were going to be honest, your expectations about the first months of your newborn were the worst possible. Turned out that it wasn’t that bad. Of course, the nights were still being animated, especially when the baby woke up with colic, but luckily, your handsome cowboy made an excellent husband and father.

In the first weeks, you were strictly forbidden to do anything but breastfeed the baby and walk a bit around the ranch, since it was a medical recommendation to help you recover from the c-section. Anything out of those two things would end up with Jack asking a hundred times if you were feeling okay and really didn’t prefer to let him do it. Sometimes you got close to getting irritated with him, but then you pondered for a moment and realized that he was just concerned about your well-being.

When your daughter was 4-months-old, things were starting to get calmer; her sleep was becoming more consistent, her episodes of colic were pretty rare, and, in a general aspect, Katherine was a pretty calm baby, only crying when her little tummy wasn’t that good was for some stuck gas or because she was hungry or when she remained too long without being snuggled by you or Jack.

But a peaceful baby didn’t mean that you didn’t have any problems to deal with.

Even after 4 months, you were still frustrated with the fact that you couldn’t have a natural delivery, even after all the times you and Jack talked about it and he reassured you endlessly that you shouldn’t martyrize yourself so much about something you had no control about, the subject was still living rent-free on your head. Such as your schism with the scar left from the c-section. There was nothing wrong with it, but to your paranoia, it didn’t matter, you’d always see it as a defect in you.

Jack had plenty of awareness of your mean thoughts about yourself and had spent a considerable time planning that night out in the city. You two had spent the last four months going out just for medical appointments and to do the groceries, a little time out without worries about diapers or a shopping list was a needed pause for both of you. Not surprising Jack at all, Ginger and Tequila didn’t even think twice before accepting to take care of their self-proclaimed niece.

“Are you two sure that you can handle it?” Jack asked while observing Ginger and Tequila absorbed watching Katherine sleeping on the baby stroller.

“You kidding? Have you forgotten I’m the older of three siblings? I’m a specialist on babies, Whiskey.” Tequila said in a convinced tone, still observing Katherine asleep.

“And I’m here to make sure he’ll not steal Katherine’s toys, so we’ll be fine.” Ginger completed calmly, also looking at Katherine.

“Something tells me that we’ll have some trouble to get our baby back.” You said observing the scene.

“Maybe you will.” Ginger turned to look at you “But what are you two still doing here?” she said while approaching you and Jack, guiding both of you to the door.

“Are we being kicked out of our own house?” Jack questioned raising one eyebrow.

“Yes.” Ginger answered naturally while opening the front door and gently putting you and Jack out “And you two better not show up here before the morning.” Before both of you even had the chance to answer, Ginger closed the door. You and Jack just looked at each other and laughed before going to the car.

---------------------

Safe to say that the night was running perfectly: a little walk around the city while talking about the most random things possible, a good dinner in a fancy restaurant, and the last stop was on a comfortable suite in a luxury hotel. Jack never failed to deliver amazing date nights.

“I have to give you the reason this time.” You said while playing with his hair, sitting sideways on his lap “We really needed to get out of home a little bit.”

“I thought you believed more in my observing skills.” Jack chuckled and kissed your shoulder, keeping his arms around your waist.

“I believe them.” You said calmly and looked away. Jack frowned and caressed your back.

“What’s the matter, honey?” he asked softly, making you look back at him.

“If I ask you something, can you give me an honest answer?” after he nodded, you took a deep breath before questioning “How bad is it?”

“You mean?” Jack asked with a confused look.

“My appearance since I gave birth.” You said calmly, looking away again “I mean, you haven’t made any move since I got cleared by the doctor to have sex again, not even tonight.” Your declaration for sure got Jack off guard, and Jack needed to ponder for a moment before answering.

“Honey, you’re turning this inside out.” He started calmly and kissed your cheek “First things first, don’t you think I don’t want you desperately because I do. The thing is, I know you’ve been dealing with a lot in the last few months. I know you still mulling over the fact that you had to go into a c-section and that the scar annoys you really much, so, the most I desire you, I’d never turn this into another thing to bother you, sugar.” Jack cupped your cheek with his hand, making you look at him “I’m fine with wait as long as it’s necessary. I want you to feel good about yourself and enjoy it, so, if you need four more months for that, I’ll wait. You’re the love of my life, the mother of my little princess, nothing is more important to me than your happiness.”

You couldn’t disguise your slight shock with all the information you received. You didn’t expect him to know so well what was going on in your mind, Jack for sure always had been a good observer, but you were sure that you had managed to keep your thoughts to yourself.

“I wasn’t expecting that.” You admitted with a surprised smile, settling better on his lap, getting mounted on his thighs, and resting your hands on his shoulders.

“C’mon, sugar, if you had taken a single look at your ass after you gave birth, I wouldn’t need to tell you all that.” You couldn’t hold back a hearty laugh, shaking your head.

“I hate you sometimes, Jack.” You said while still smiling, observing the smirk on his lips.

“Hate me as much as you want, but you can’t deny that my techniques are effective.” He answered in the cocky manner you loved so much and rested his hands on your thighs.

“You might have a point, but now back to business.” You said while settling better on his lap “I don’t think I’ll need four more months.”

“I’m seeing that, honey.” Jack raised his eyebrows, still smirking and moving his hands up on your body “Especially having your cleavage so close to my face.” He said while cupping your breasts softly.

“I didn’t hear your complaint about it.” You said with a sideways smile while undoing his tie and starting to unbutton his shirt.

“I’d never be that crazy, mainly now with this whole breastfeeding thing doing wonders here.” He said quietly, leaning forward to kiss the skin of your breasts that was exposed on your cleavage.

“You had no single crumb of decency left.” You said in a chuckle “I like it.”

“I know you do.” He said looking up to you, moving one hand to the back of your neck, and kissing you passionately.

And it was more than enough for you to forget any possible concern left.

You allowed yourself to dive in on the moment, enjoying the feeling of Jack’s hands and body all over you. Without even realizing it, you kept what you were doing before, getting rid of his shirt and moving your hands down to undo his belt. Also, not wasting time, Jack moved one hand to the zipper of your dress, opening it and taking it off your body without a second thought, promptly doing the same with your underwear. You moaned quietly when he placed you lying on your back on the bed, caressing the sides of your body and looking at you with a wide smile.

“You’re so beautiful, honeybee. I love you so much.” He whispered close to your mouth, biting your bottom lip and moving forward to kiss your neck slowly, making you unable to do anything but grab his hair and sigh loudly.

Despite his growing desire, Jack held himself back, moving slowly down your body and touching your body gently, aware that you were still very sensitive, not only on the physical aspect. But that didn’t prevent him from savoring every inch of your skin, kissing and nibbling every place he could reach, making you squirm and moan quietly, pulling his hair without even noticing.

Once he reached your lower stomach, Jack couldn’t prevent himself from kissing the scar of your c-section as he always had been tempted to do, not only to remind you that there was nothing wrong with it or because it had been the solution for you and the baby to get out from the labor safely but because he genuinely found it beautiful. You could feel your heart racing a bit while feeling all his attention tuned to that spot you’ve tried to avoid so much the last months.

When Jack finally moved to where you desperately needed him, you couldn’t contain your reflex of squeezing his head between your thighs while whimpering audibly and pulling his hair. And, Jack being Jack, loved your genuine reaction and of course, he would do his best to make you react even more, turning all his attention to your sensitive throbbing clit, while letting his fingertips circle your wet entrance.

At that point you were all messed up, contorting on the bed, pulling his hair, arching your back, and unable to contain your moans. Being away from him on the sexual field for four months certainly hadn’t helped with your self-control, but Jack wasn’t being exactly cooperative while smoothly sliding his fingers inside you and curling them to hit that precise spot that never failed to make you lose your composure. And it wouldn’t be different that time.

You just focused on enjoying every feeling you could get from the moment, noticing your involuntary movements getting more intense but unable to control them. You tangled your fingers in Jack’s hair, pulling it hard and squeezing his head even more between your thighs as you got taken aback by that intense orgasm. Jack smiled satisfied seeing you melted on the bed with your breath out of rhythm.

Calmly, he moved on the bed to lay at your side, caressing your face softly. You opened your eyes slowly and looked at him with a satisfied smile.

“Don’t look at me like that, you’re already pretty enough without making any effort.” He said quietly and kissed you softly, making you moan when you tasted yourself on his lips.

“I have a doubt.” You said quietly against his lips “Why haven’t you got rid of your vacuum-packed jeans yet?” he chuckled and shook his head.

“You’re getting way too audacious, little lady.” Jack said with a smirk but didn’t hesitate to get rid of his remaining clothes.

“You’re too well-behaved tonight for my taste.” You teased as he crawled on the bed, getting on top of you.

“Can you blame me? I have the most beautiful lady with me, of course, I’ll behave well.” He teased back with that charming smirk.

“You need to take it easy with your flirt.” You said while passing your arms around his neck.

“Now you’re asking for too much.” He said as if it was serious and leaned to kiss you.

You whimpered quietly as you felt him moving slowly inside you, and sank one hand on his hair, tightening your other arm around his neck even though your whole body relaxed with that amazing feeling.

“You’re okay, honey?” Jack asked quietly against your lips while caressing your waist. You just nodded and kissed him again, starting to get highly needy of him once more.

Jack for sure was caught off guard by your reaction, but followed your rhythm, kissing you passionately while caressing and groping every part of your body he could reach, feeling his heart racing considerably, not only for the physical effort, but because have you so relaxed into the moment after all the harsh moments you had been through could make Jack cry genuine happy tears if he thought too much about it.

If you had to say, you wouldn’t remember when you had hooked your legs on Jack’s hips, wanting him the closest possible from you. When both of you needed a moment to catch a breath, you for sure got slightly melted when Jack rested his forehead on yours, looking deep into your eyes. Conscious about the emotional and psychological weight all of that had on you, Jack wouldn’t waste the chance to remind you of how much he loved and appreciated you.

“You’re so amazing, honeybee. I love you so much.” His velvety voice whispering that by itself was already enough to affect you, but with his warm brown gaze staring straight into your eyes, it for sure had hit you a hundred times harder, making you unconsciously pull him closer with your legs and arms.

Seeing you craving for him that much, Jack allowed himself to move slightly faster and move one of his hands over your skin more intensely, while the other moved down to between your legs, rubbing your clit at the same pace of his thrusts, turning you into a complete mess of moans, whimpers, and spasms, giving him an incredible opportunity of ruin your rationality even more.

“My pretty lady is enjoying herself so much.” Jack kept his low tone, aware of its effects on you “You look so beautiful like that, sweetheart, even more than you already usually do.” He moved his free hand to your face, gently holding your jaw to keep your face the closest possible of his, wanting all your attention just to push you even closer to your limit “You feel so good, sugar, and I love you so much, I could never ask for a better wife.”

That hit you harder than you could ever imagine.

The incredible feeling of finally having his body joined to yours again for itself was already more than you could bear, but that amount of praising was definitely more than you could deal with. You could only surrender to the incredible number of feelings, scratching the back of his neck and pulling his hair as you moaned loudly and closed your eyes hard, feeling your legs trembling slightly as you enjoyed your orgasm.

Jack was having a tough time trying to contain himself and, when he saw that astonishing vision of you moaning and contorting under his body, he just sank his face on the curve of your neck and groaned hoarsely against your skin as he came inside you.

After being able to recover his breath and rationality, Jack leaned to the side, pulling you close to his chest, kissing your forehead, and caressing your back. You still were boneless and lazy, so the most you could do was nestle against him and look at him with a soft and happy expression, sighing when he caressed your cheek.

“It’s so good to see this adorable look on your face again.” He said calmly, still caressing your cheek.

“I think you’ll need to plan a few more date nights for us.” You said while letting your fingers draw senseless forms on his skin.

“Trust me, sugar. I already have another twenty plans.” Jack winked at you with a smirk and pressed a soft kiss on your lips.

Cowboytober Masterlist

[woonova]

꩜ ﾟ˖ SING ME TO SLEEP !.

◟﹙ 🎡 ﹚kim sunoo ﹕oneshot ﹙ @woonova ﹚

ʚɞ ﾟ˖  written to say something by twice

ʚɞ ﾟ˖  genre fluff, high school au

ʚɞ ﾟ˖  synopsis annoyed at the fact that he would now have to take a different bus because of his teacher's actions sunoo saunters into the afternoon with a displeased mood, that quickly changes once he catches sight of you heading towards the empty seat next to him

ʚɞ ﾟ˖  warning none i'm aware of, plz notify me if you find any

ʚɞ ﾟ˖  wc 0.95k

rin's notes ! tumblr’s algorithm works best with reblogging so plz consider reblogging and liking my posts

SUNOO WAS STARTING TO GET ANNOYED. Slowly, but surely, his eyes were forming into sharp creases and the furrow of his eyebrows grew deeper with every passing minute — forming a deep line in the center of his forehead.

He was meant to leave this dreary building an hour ago — happily finding a seat next to the bus' window as he listened to the soothing melodies that were emitted from his dark coloured earbuds. He grumbled to himself as he stepped out of the building, clearly upset at the fact that his extra lesson's teacher had kept back the class for an extra hour. He would now have to take a different bus that took a longer route, which he was obviously not very keen on doing.

The wait was a short one, it seemed as if as soon as he sat at the waiting area, with an irritated expression and a pout etched on his lips, the bus driver decided to arrive and end his misery. 'It could be worse,' Sunoo thought as he stepped up the worn out steps. The bus wasn't crowded and still had a decent amount of seats left, which Sunoo grinned at — at least he wouldn't have to give up his beloved window seat.

But alas, all happiness and excitement turned to nervousness as tension raked along his body like a thick blanket. He sat upright, anxiously pulling his eyes over your advancing figure.

You seemed tired, exhausted even. Hair pulled back into a messy updo, loose curls escaping — creating a beautiful frame for your face. Your face that carried a drowsy expression, lips pulled into a small pout and eyes slowly hoping for an empty seat to earn its visibility. And before long, you were seated at the far end of the bus, situated in the last row away from all noise and distraction. In an empty seat next to him.

Kim Sunoo was never in your group of associates. Sure, you had seen him lurking around the campus, his bright eyes and radiant smile instantly setting him apart from the rest, but you had never been one to actively seek out an interaction with the boy.

Likewise, you were never a member in Sunoo's large group of friends. Yes, he had seen you around many a times, to the point where his friend, Jungwon claimed he had a special eye just for you. But, unlike you Sunoo had always wondered what you were like under your mask of indifference. He thought of how beautiful your smile would be and the sound of your laughter as he relayed to you one of the many jokes that passed around his circle.

As you sat next to the peachy boy you could almost instantly clock the tension in the air. His shoulders were stiff as he held his backpack close, almost afraid to come any closer than he already was.

"Are you okay?" a soft voice called out and Sunoo abruptly turned to find its owner. He was so baffled that you were even speaking to him that he disregarded the fact that his weird behaviour was evident to you. While you were worried because you were sure of the fact that if he didnt relax soon he would probably face whiplash.

"Calm down, im not gonna hurt you or anything. It's just that you looked a little frightened." you later voiced out after the small pause of silence. Sunoo let out a breath as he relaxed in his seat, becoming hyper aware of his behaviour towards you. He cleared his throat before responding, "Umm yeah, i'm fine." internally cringing at the way his voice sounded.

"Cool, wouldn't want you passing out on me now."

And Sunoo let out a small chuckle at this, "Yeah, cool."

After your unexpected interaction you both fell into a comfortable air of silence. His thick blanket seemingly, slowly slid off leaving him comfortably perched on his seat as he stared out the window, hoping to get away from your gaze. He was falling back into his regular routine. Sweet melodies traveling through his earbuds as he gazed out at the unfamiliar scenery.

Contentment, that could be the word to describe his state as he lightly hummed to himself, creating a beautiful harmony for whoever heard it. You were still seated next to him, your face still carrying that tired expression but now you were a bit more relaxed. And Sunoo couldn't help but think he was the reason as he physically felt you calm down beside him. Your head unconsciously traveling towards his shoulder, as your grip on your own backpack loosened.

And with this newfound knowledge Sunoo continued his actions. He slowly reached upwards to fix your body against his, so that you wouldn't have to worry about a neck ache later in the afternoon and pulled your bag closer into his lap. Never stopping the soothing noises that came from his mouth. You both stayed like this until the end of the ride, sat in soothing tranquility as a blanket of peace wrapped around you.

You awoke from a light shake on your shoulder, it was Sunoo. "Uhh were almost at my stop so I thought i'd wake you." his voice was ever so quiet as if he was afraid to pull you out of your peaceful state.

"Oh yeah no worries, i'm sorry for you know...." you trailed off at the end of your sentence growing a bit shy because of your current situation.

"Don't worry it's not a problem. I'll always be here if you need a shoulder to lay on." He offered you a sly smile.

"I'll hold you to it then."

"I would be sad if you didn't."

ʚɞ ﾟ˖  sponsors @hyfenet @k-labels @en-web @k-films

© https://...woonova | 2023

[sarahfeliciam]

The Ultimatum Ch 1

Author's Note: I know this is jumping right into the story, but that is where my inspiration struck. Rest assured, there will be flashbacks throughout the story every now and again as we go forward. This shall take us from Prisoner of Azkaban through Deathly Hallows and beyond. Bear with me on updates, I am a mama to three and plan to attempt updating twice weekly. Let's pray ha! 

"You wanted to see me, Professor Lupin?"

Even from the far back of the classroom, her words were louder than her knock. She was a bright and bubbly young witch. Remus turned on his heel behind his desk and looked up at her. He took a split second to take in her kind eyes, glistening much like his used to, and her soft and curly, chestnut hair. She wore her tattered Hufflepuff robes with pride and walked slowly toward the desk as he raised a hand to motion to her.

"Yes, Miss Whitticker, please have a seat."

He stood awkwardly before her as she obliged, clasping his hands together and ringing them around eachother once before forcing himself to sit opposite her, the large mahogany desk separating them. She breathed in deeply the smell of old books and Belgian chocolate.

"Are you alright, Professor?"

Her kind eyes shined at him once again and she smiled politely. Somehow, he managed a smile back.

"Yes, I'm sorry," he chose his words carefully. "I want to deliver this news as gentle as one can, is all."

He watched the color leave her face as her lips parted slightly.

"Oh, Merlin, I've failed my term paper, haven't I?" She shot up from her seated position and began pacing in a quickly induced panic across his floor, muttering to herself about surmounting to nothing in life.

"Emeline!"

She broke clean of her reverie and looked up into his eyes, realizing then her professor had her by both shoulders gently.

"You haven't failed anything."

Wheels turned in her brain like the innards of a clock and it shown plainly on her face.

"Well, what have you to tell me then, Professor?"

She watched him swallow hard before slowly lowering his hands and standing over her, looking down with his usual cozy demeanor. But the love she felt in his gaze was different than even his usual teaching spirit.

"Emeline, you're my daughter."

There it was: her clockwork turning again, however this time it took much longer to tick. She stared up at him blankly as she grasped to register what he'd said. Hands stuffed in his pockets, he kept his gaze unwavering, although turning a bit concerned as he searched her face for any sliver of impending comment.

"Em-"

"-your daughter?"

His heart broke at the unusual meekness in her voice.

"Yes."

It only took a moment longer for her to complete her absorption of this earth-shaking admission. Before he could have a chance to process, she pulled him into a close hug and began to cry quietly against his worn, tweed coat.

"I always dreamed you existed."

Her immediate proximity and sharing of dreams had him taken aback, but he tapped into instincts he always dreamed he had if they were admitting hopes, and rested his hand on the back of her head, pulling her closer.

"I'm so sorry you've lived in that for so long."

She released her grip and looked up now with a furrow in her brow.

"Why didn't you come to me sooner?"

He'd never seen hurt or anger flash across her face before, so he wasn't sure which it was. But guilt enveloped him like a suffocating blanket.

"Why don't we sit again?"

He waited for her to take a seat, pinching the bridge of his nose and breathing in deeply before taking his own again.

"I imagine that you're aware that your grandparents.. weren't my largest supporters," he spoke cautiously, the last thing he'd desire to do was insult the only family she'd grown up with aside from her mother. "They made that very quickly known to your mother and I."

"But," she looked torn but didn't break her stare. "My grandparents never spoke of you; not any father for that matter."

Remus lifted his head in a half-nod of understanding and leaned back in his chair. He supposed that did make sense now, however it was never a theory he had entertained. In fact, there was only one he subscribed to.

"I thought for sure they'd make it known to you as well, the ultimatum that stood."

If Remus expected any response from her, it certainly wasn't a laugh. Yet here Emeline was before him: that precious smile she'd always worn turned all the way up into a chuckle.

"Forgive me - what ultimatum would have grounds to keep me from my own father? Murdered someone, have you?"

The air grew thick, though Remus knew he was the only one who could feel it. He'd pondered this exact moment all of his life since learning he'd be a father. Naturally, he never could've dreamed he'd be separated from his child for thirteen years. However, he did often wonder how he or she would take to the news when they were old enough to comprehend it.

Exactly what he was; exactly how dangerous he was.

She wore a new expression now. He could recognize this one, she wore it in class often: she was hanging on his every word.

"Emeline, I'm not sure I have the words for this-"

"-you certainly came out with this announcement easily enough and it is the biggest news of my life. What could hold more weight than that?"

He watched her quietly. How could he gain her and lose her in the same few moments? All that pressed him on was simply the fact that he knew he must. He had to make sense of this for her.

"Your grandparents had every reason to forbid your mother and you from allowing my involvement."

"What did you do?" Her words were a bit more forceful now; perhaps they were tinged with slight hesitation. Nonetheless, it was now or never.

"It was never what I did but rather, what I am."

Emeline's face paled into an almost white that was so solemn Remus struggled to accept it was the same student he'd come to know this year.

"You don't need to continue, Professor. My grandparents only ever hated one thing in this world." Her voice sounded bitter, an emotion he'd never seen from her whilst teaching.

"Werewolves." He whispered, nodding.

She shook her head frantically and held up her hand.

"Please. Don't."

He quieted and sat back immediately, feeling the weight of what he was sure being before the Wizengamot would feel like. He pleaded his case with the look he cast her, awaiting her next response for what seemed a decade. As he waited, he took a moment to absorb the gravity of the situation in front of him. Despite knowing all along that Emeline was his sole reason for returning to Hogwarts and he couldn't have helped the ultimatum he was given all those years ago, he felt like a fraud. How had he really let her grow up without him? In the silence, he was able to take in her gentlest quirks; the way she had found an object to fixate on already much like he used to as she toyed with the fraying end of her cloak. When they were finally in an entirely new millennia by the time she spoke, she took him by surprise.

"I said my grandparents hated them, not that I do." Her facial expression softened as he watched her find her own footing and belief right in front of him. She didn't look as pale now, he noted.

"Em," he reached his hand out to her across the desk, remembering momentarily when her newborn fingers clutched around his for the first and only time. He pulled back when she failed to respond and it occurred to him just how much of a stranger he was to her. "Forgive me. I don't know how to make this better but it appears I certainly know how to make it worse. I appreciate your kindness but you need not pretend on my account and I only hope to navigate this as you see fit. However on that note, I have one more necessity to discuss."

She nodded at his return to teacher monologue. "I've never found reason in my life to lie and I won't start now, Professor. Please, continue."

"This entire discussion is emotionally taxing, I'm sure you'd agree. I've always only wanted what's best for you and I have missed you from the day I had to say goodbye, Emeline. I know you may not believe that right now, but I swear to Merlin not a day has past I haven't thought of you. Even the days of the moon. In wishing to shield you any further confusion or pain, I've had to be convinced of this by Dumbledore. It seems he disagrees that there is any reason for our family to remain separate now… in light of recent events." At his last word, his voice broke again out of the confines of teacher. She saw the tears stinging to be free from his eyes and swallowed thickly.

Emeline had been wondering where she'd call home now that her mother was gone, following her grandfather who held out for quite some time after her grandmother. It had all happened so quickly with her mother, that she agreed to return to Hogwarts for third year in a mourning haze. Dumbledore promised her he would have her home life sorted and offer her the comfort she desperately needed to pull through this insurmountable loss. Emeline couldn't have possibly fathomed that the details were so pristinely ironed out behind closed doors, though. She has given up the dream of a father a long time ago. It almost stung, being left out in the dark until now. Why wouldn't Professor Lupin have collected her immediately? Why the 'welcome back' and 'meet your new Professor' charade? Nevertheless, she shook her head to release the emotions bubbling inside her. She was an easy crier and her eyes looked similar to her father's at present, though she was desperately teetering on the chasm between composure and floodgates at the mention of her mother and at the dawning of this life changing news.

"I have so many questions." She choked out.

He couldn't avoid it any longer. He stood swiftly and was relieved that she did as well, sobbing against his chest as he came in to hug her. It felt as though she was weeping years of heartache from her body and at that moment she couldn't have cared who was in the room. She clung to him tightly; the only family she had left.

"I will spend my life answering your questions, Emeline."

Author's Note: There it is – our first chapter! I have such an idea for this story and so hope you all would enjoy following along. If fanfiction still has active readers who are enjoying this, please give me a favorite or review – it is so encouraging to know I am not alone in the tumbleweeds out here writing Remus for over fifteen years now, haha!

[maximura]

Ad Astra: The Theory Of Relativity | An Interstellar Ateez story Part I | Part II | Part III | Park IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII (Words 5000, Gen, Warnings: swearing) You can now also read it all on A03

The rocket thrusters continue to fire at 100% but they cannot maintain the shuttle’s momentum without the pilot taking control of the flight path. The shuttle’s wing panels shake and shimmer with instability, the craft veers dangerously off course, losing both fuel and momentum as it surges haphazardly towards the exosphere. 

The pilot loses control of the engines. 

The pilot loses control of the thrusters. 

The pilot loses control of the navigation. 

The shuttle breaks apart in the exosphere with no survivors on board. 

The screen goes black.

*

“This simulation is rigged!” San announces hotly as he climbs out of the flight simulator.

“No, it’s not.” Hongjoong replies through the intercom of the control room. “This is based on a real mission. It is achievable.”

“I’ve done it twice and it’s failed both times. Even Mingyu didn’t get past the exosphere and Taehyun crashed it four times! How do we even know it can be done?"

Seungcheol steeples his fingers in contemplation but there’s a sly mischievous grin on his face as he looks at Hongjoong and nods towards the simulator. 

“Go on. Show the children.” 

Hongjoong pushes the intercom button again.

“I know it can be done San because I did it. This was my mission. I wrote this simulation."

If earning Choi San’s awe and respect turns out to be a bad influence on the teenager, well that’s between them and God. 

****

Dear Mr Kim, 

I regret to inform you that there has been an incident regarding Flight Training Simulator A. As you know, an emergency meeting has been arranged tomorrow. You are expected to arrive at 9:00am KST sharp. I’m sure you are also aware, though I feel the need to remind you again, that the consequence of your non-compliance, like mine, always leads to martial law.

Regards, 

Dr Park Seonghwa

NASA Deputy head of Astrophysics, Robotic Engineering and Interstellar Biology, PhD

P.S I strongly advise that you dress appropriately and avoid any confrontation, for both our sakes. As I am writing to you in confidence, please delete this message after reading. 

****

“Yunho! Get up!” 

The lump on the bed doesn’t move.

At least not until Hongjoong nudges it with his foot. “I’m serious, get up! I need to talk to you.”

Groaning, Yunho rolls over, a little shocked to see his older brother fully dressed up in a shirt and tie this early on a Saturday morning.

“Why are you up already? What are you wearing?” He croaks, throat rusty from sleep. “Is that dad’s tie?”

Hongjoong is reading a letter with a deep frown on his face. “I’ve been called into NASA’s head office for an urgent meeting, they’re flipping out about something. I need you to start that job on Mr Lee’s tractor engine by yourself today. You know how, we did the same thing a few weeks ago. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“What? By myself?” Yunho repeats in disbelief. "Are you sure?"

Hongjoong doesn’t look up from his letter. “Yes I'm sure. I’ve already called Mr Lee. He’s fine with it as long as I come take a look this afternoon to double check. You’ll be fine, you’ve done it plenty of times already.”

Yunho sits up in bed now. “I’ve only done it five times Hongjoong and you were there for all of them.” 

“I barely had to correct you on anything last time. You don't really need me anymore. You're ready.”

Yunho just gapes at him, mouth opening and closing without any words coming out. 

Hongjoong finally folds the offending document he’s reading into his bag and looks at his brother. 

They’ve been so tired and caught up in their own separate problems that they’ve missed how worn out the other has been. The NASA job eats up most of Hongjoong’s time and if there’s anything left over, it’s spent trying to keep up with all the farming jobs that continue to come in.

Hongjoong makes it a rule that no matter where their day takes them, they come home to eat dinner together. Yunho appreciates how hard his older brother is trying to hold everything together but can’t ignore the way that grip is slipping. One day there won't be a grip at all. One day Yunho will need to take matters into his own hands. He knows it's coming, he just doesn't know when.

“Listen, if you can’t do it, I’ll call Mr Lee and reschedule it.” Hongjoong sighs, running a hand through his hair. “He’ll understand."

“No, I can do it!” Yunho interjects loudly, wincing at how harsh his voice suddenly got. “It’s just….I haven’t done a whole job without you before.”

Hongjoong comes over to squeeze his brother's shoulder firmly, the movement is reassuring and grounding for the both of them. “The tractor is older than you. It’s basic as they come. Mr Lee isn’t in a rush so you’ll be fine. Wooyoung is on for tool-duty. You got this.”

“Well, um okay. If you think so.”

“Yes, I do.” Hongjoong nods. “Now get up. It’s 8am. I’ll drop you guys off with the tools on the way.”

“Can I have five more minutes?”

“Sure.”

“Really?”

“Nope. Get your ass up now.”

*****

It's with a sense of deja vu that Hongjoong meets Seungcheol in the dim corridor of NASA’s headquarters. The older man painting a well-practiced picture of apathy: his white shirt sleeves are already rolled up to the elbows, dark blue tie slackened despite the early hour and those broad shoulders devoid of any tension at all as they lean against the wall.

He wears a deeply unimpressed expression on his face which only brightens up when he sees Hongjoong approaching. 

“Morning!”

“Morning?” Hongjoong replies slowly, confused by the jovial tone of his friend at a time like this. “Did you get the same memos as me? NASA sounds pissed.”

“Every government agency sounds pissed.” Seungcheol points out. “Same shit, different day.”

“Why don’t you have PTSD from this?” Hongjoong asks. “Last time we were both summoned to a meeting together, we both lost our jobs.”

Seungcheol laughs brightly. “Well, kiddo, the thing is: we’re all they’ve got. They know it. I know it. You know it. So this is probably just a little formality to let them air their grievances so it looks like we got disciplined. Just nod and smile and we’ll be outta here in 40 minutes max.”

Hongjoong opens his mouth to protest but Seungcheol is already holding up a finger. “Do. Not. Engage. You hear me? Your mouth and attitude always gets us in trouble.”

“Me?! But I don’t even know what-”

Seungcheol quirks a strong, and vaguely threatening, eyebrow. 

“Okay okay.” Hongjoong sighs, holding his hands up in surrender. “No engaging, I got it.”

“Good. Just smile and nod. It’ll be fine!” Seungcheol chirps cheerfully again. “Whatever this bullshit is, let’s just get it over with. The fucking audacity to call me in on my day off and not even tell me the emergency. I swear these clowns just want to push my buttons.”

Hongjoong looks over, confused again. Maybe Seungcheol didn’t get the same memo from Dr. Park. Maybe he just didn’t bother to read the details. Or maybe he didn’t want to know, though the latter scenarios seem highly unlikely. Which leaves… 

“We’re all here on our day off Commander Choi. Perhaps the clowns are just ready for the circus to roll into town.”

Doctor Park Seonghwa. 

He had walked up to them so quietly that Hongjoong barely even heard it. They nod a polite greeting to one another but nothing more is said.

It's been awhile since they saw each other; a few weeks feeling like years, both men now in possession of longer hair, shorter tempers and heavier responsibilities. Not even the dim lighting of NASA’s corridor could hide their dark circles and tired lines; familiar telltale signs of one’s complete inability to find any work-life balance. 

They share a brief look of what might be understanding or maybe commiseration, on Hongjoong’s part anyway, before Yeosang directs them into the boardroom with a professionally neutral expression on his face. 

And then it begins. 

Yeosang clears his throat before briefing the room on the latest developments: 

“Last night, Friday 22nd, at approximately 7pm, our security personnel received an alert from the Western training facility. Upon further investigation, a Level 1 trainee was discovered in Flight Training Simulator A. He was promptly escorted off the premises and will be questioned in due course. This meeting’s purpose is to address the unfortunate news that there has been a malfunction with Simulator A that has rendered it inoperable for the foreseeable future. We have our technicians assessing it as we speak.”

What the hell.

Hongjoong notices that Professsor Park is not present around the table but the same familiar suits and faces from his previous interrogation are. This is not going to end well. Not when he was the last person to run a simulation on that very machine. 

“Commander Choi, as lead instructor, what is your knowledge regarding the malfunction of Flight Training Simulator A?”

For all his intensity and prickly demeanour, Seungcheol remains oddly civil. “The simulator was functioning normally during the last training session. I have no knowledge of any malfunctions. NASA doesn’t pay me enough to babysit the children after hours.”

The suits are unamused but accept his answer and move on.

“Mr Kim, what is your knowledge regarding the malfunction of Flight Training Simulator A?”

“Training finished at the scheduled 5pm. The simulator was working normally when we left. I….was at a birthday party for my brother after that. I don’t have any knowledge of the malfunction either.”

There’s a murmur from the Head Suits but they also move on, turning to the left to address someone else. 

“Doctor Park, as a Deputy Head, what is your knowledge regarding the malfunction of Flight Training Simulator A?”

Hongjoong looks across the tablet in surprise.

The young Doctor is trying keeping his face neutral but Hongjoong can see his jaw muscles tensing, no doubt a movement to contain the simmering frustration underneath.

“As I have already informed you all in writing, I do not have further knowledge of the malfunction.”

The Blue Suit leans forward, in both a leering and aggressive way that makes Hongjoong’s hands twitch. “Yes, of course we have read your email but what I am asking you now Doctor Park, is why your security ID tag was used to access the training facility after hours?”

Quiet gasps of shock ripples through the room and Hongjoong looks at the Doctor in earnest now, searching that stern and cold face for any signs of….anything. 

But there’s barely anything else to find. 

“I believe I also explained that in my email.” Doctor Park replies evenly, before dropping his security tag onto the wooden table with a loud clack that echoes uncomfortably in the cavernous room. “There is only one copy of my security ID tag and it is sitting here on this table right now. If there is another one out there, then that is a security issue, because I can assure you that I have not-“

“Could it be that you allowed the trainee to borrow it?” The Blue Suit interrupts. “He would have access to it, would he not? Perhaps when you were not looking?”

“No. I did not do that.” Doctor Park furrows his eyebrows in frustration. It’s a small movement but it’s there. The cracks are beginning to show and it makes Hongjoong suddenly nervous to see the other man be anything but a cold stone wall.

“He knows not to do that.”

He? 

Who?

Oh no.

Hongjoong is still processing the information but Seungcheol is leaning back in his chair chuckling quietly to himself, as if he’s figured it all out and all that’s missing is a bowl of popcorn to enjoy the show. 

“But he did do it.” The Blue Suit pushes on. “We have security footage that Choi San used your ID tag to gain access to the training facility, then proceeded to spend the next three hours frying the electrics of our Flight Simulator. What do you think we should do about that?”

Doctor Park’s hands form two fists on the table for a few seconds before relaxing again. “He is to face the consequences the Board sees fit but I ask you to consider his age and abilities-“

“You cannot be impartial.” The Blue Suit scowls, shaking his head in disappointment. “The board members have been considering removing you from the Lazarus mission. Favouritism has no place at NASA.”

At this, there is audible shock in the room. Even Seungcheol sits up. 

“What the hell?!” It slips from Hongjoong’s mouth before his filter could even catch it. “This is ridiculous. It’s mostly his mission!”

Seungcheol groans beside him and kicks at his ankle in warning. “Don’t…”

But it’s too late, all the attention swings from Doctor Park to rest heavily on Hongjoong’s face. Suddenly his dad’s tie feels like it’s choking him.

Flashbacks flood his mind now; from being escorted off his half broken ship, to the humiliating hearing, to the disappointment on his parent's faces, to Seungcheol’s angry tirade in the aftermath and finally, to them both being fired permanently from any NASA or military employment. 

Yeosang clears his throat, perhaps sensing the precarious mood in the room, and speaks before the Suits get the chance. 

“Mr Kim, if you do not have any further relevant information to contribute to this matter, I would suggest letting the Board continue.”

It’s a warning and a small mercy. Seungcheol has to kick Hongjoong’s ankle twice to get the message across. 

“Yes. I apologise.” Hongjoong forces himself to say. “I don’t have any more….relevant information.” 

The Suits turn back to Doctor Park, whose elegant edges were beginning to fray. 

“Doctor Park, the Board has always appreciated you and your father’s generosity in assisting Trainee Choi San into the program. We regret Professor Park cannot join us today but we cannot be seen showing leniency and favouritism in the face of such egregious irresponsibility. The Board moves to relieve you of your role in the flight training portion of the Lazarus Mission. You will only have security clearance for your robotics and biological pursuits. Trainee Choi will be demoted from Level 1 to Level 2 as a consequence. You understand this has to be done. We take no joy in it.”

Doctor Park’s jaw tenses again and Hongjoong can feel the intensity rolling off the other man in deafening waves. 

“I ask you to please reconsider. I will pay for the repairs, I can assure you Trainee Choi only had good intentions-“

The Blue Suit laughs. “His good intentions broke a $10 Million dollar NASA grade machine.”

The Doctor slumps at that. Finally defeated.

“The Board’s decision is final. If there are any objections from any other members, let them voice it now.”

Hongjoong’s fingers dig into the arm rests but before he can even move forward in his seat to protest again, Seungcheol’s hand shoots out to yank him back. “No.”

When Hongjoong looks across the table to lock eyes with Doctor Park, he’s met with a small dejected shake of the head.

Remnants of last night's email echoes in his head;

P.S I strongly advise that you dress appropriately and avoid any confrontation, for both our sakes.

It's only then that the fight leaves Hongjoong. 

“That concludes the first portion of today’s meeting.” Yeosang’s neutral voice fills the room again. “We move to the second portion, regarding the unsatisfactory behaviour and progress of our trainees. The Board expresses concerns regarding the training methods used by Commander Choi and Mr Kim, from whom we request an explanation.”

It takes a few seconds for Seungcheol to move forward in his seat, like he had all the time in the world. His tie remains askew and he runs a hand through his long dark hair before speaking. The movement irks several Board Members and Hongjoong marvels at Seungcheol’s exceptional talent for pissing off government heads. 

“We’ve inherited a misfit group of mediocre pilot trainees. It takes time breaking bad habits, we’re doing it as fast as we can. Bad habits are worse than no habits.”

“What is your solution for this mediocre performance?”

“Solution?” Seungcheol snorts a laugh that sounds both resigned and annoyed. “You want us to upskill a bunch of kids in 12 months, at something that takes at least 4 years, in a job that less than 1% of the population can perform, with 90% less resources. The solution is to keep going.”

“Keep going?” The Blue Suit deadpans condescendingly. “That’s the solution? Could you be more specific? Might I remind you of the amount of goodwill and money we have—“

Seungcheol breathes in and out so heavily and so slowly that the entire room can see it, hear it and feel it. Like a Dragon taking pause before it makes a kill. Even Yeosang shifts uncomfortably in his chair. 

“No. You may not.” The commander says coldly. “No amount of money can fix them. If you want specifics: these kids aren’t good enough. The only solution for better results is better training and better pilots. We’re working like hell on the former but we’re in short supply of the latter.”

Hongjoong braces himself as Seungcheol continues. 

“Do not speak to me about goodwill. Your goodwill means nothing. These kids know they may be giving up their lives for future missions and they’re still stubborn enough to keep going. That’s the only goodwill I care about.”

There is a beat of silence but miraculously, Blue Suit only frowns as he continues. “How do you propose to increase their experience now that one of the simulators is out of action? Are you prepared to increase your work hours? Are either of you? We need pilots ready as soon as possible.”

“Well, you already have a fully trained pilot don’t you?" Seungcheol says, his eyes full of apology as they land on Hongjoong. "He’s a bit rusty, sure, but it would take me less time getting him mission-ready than it would running that pilot daycare.”

Seungcheol pauses, and there’s another rare gentle look in his eyes as he regards Hongjoong again, “The pilot daycare is years away from being mission ready so if you people want a competent pilot in space in the next 6 months, get the CyberSynk program back online. CAASI was made for this wasn’t he?”

This question is directed at Doctor Park, whose shock is clearly visible. “Yes but he hasn't done a flight with another human since the program shut down."

"But he can do it can't he? Isn't this what you built him for?"

"....Yes."

The Suits voice their objections but Seungcheol pushes on.

“How soon can you get him and LEO flight ready?”

Doctor Park is taken aback by the question again but after a moment's pause, his reply comes out steady, “A month at most, to recalibrate the data and sequences.”

“See? There you go. I solved this ridiculous maths problem for you all.” Seungcheol leans back in his chair with a smug grin before pointing to both Hongjoong and Doctor Park. “I need that lunatic because he’s our best pilot and I need the good doctor over there for his robots. So if you really want to get this circus on the road, you’re going to need to immediately re-instate both of them as active mission personnel.”

The room breaks out into instant loud protest again but Hongjoong can’t hear them above the chaos in his head. How well does Seungcheol know CAASI? Who was LEO? The CyberSynk Program was shut down by NASA years ago because they couldn't be convinced that man and robot could co-pilot a space shuttle together into deep space. They had deemed the standard built-in auto-pilot AI option was already adequate. If CyberSynk has been shut down for all these years, why was CAASI built for it?

Hongjoong can’t think straight. There’s a loud ringing in his ears that keeps him frozen in his chair but when he finally lifts his head up to look across the table, all he sees is Doctor Park’s wide eyes locking into his. 

There’s Shock. Concern. But underneath it all, determination. 

****

Hongjoong sits on a metal bench, hidden away from the main building, just breathing and staring at the expanse of dirt and dust in front of him. It was quiet, calm, not altogether unpleasant but this dusty-nothingness wasn’t really a way to live either. His brothers deserve better. 

There’s a rustle to his left that pulls him back to the present and when he looks up, he’s surprised it’s neither of the people he expected; not a smugly victorious Seungcheol or a stressed-out Doctor Park but a lanky teenager in a shirt and tie who had the audacity to look sheepish.

“Hi.” San says quietly. 

“Hey.” Hongjoong replies back, attempting a smile but knowing it comes across as a grimace, judging by the way San just stays awkwardly rooted in his spot. 

“Sorry….about your meeting. You probably had better things to do today.”

Hongjoong chuckles. “That’s what you’re sorry about? You’re not sorry about breaking a 10 million dollar NASA machine?”

San pokes at the gravel with the toe of his shoe and shrugs. “It was an old machine on it’s last legs anyway. It was going to die soon, especially with all the training we’ve been doing on it lately. That thing is older than me. Seonghwa took me to see it when I first came to NASA.”

Hongjoong recalls San’s story; of him being orphaned as a child, brought to NASA, taken in by a generous family...

Oh.

It suddenly explains so much.

“So, er, you and Doctor Park….” Hongjoong starts carefully, unsure how to really continue but really wanting to ask. San must have understood the silence because he takes a step closer, this time with a fond smile. 

“Professor Park adopted me in when I was little. Seonghwa has always been a brother to me.” The young pilot says. “NASA didn’t really like it, something about how unfair it was and they how thought I cheated my way in. Maybe I’m just good!”

Hongjoong laughs out loud at the arrogance of teenage hood. He’s heard this before because he probably said the exact same thing to Seungcheol once upon a time and earned a good cuff behind the ears. The laughter startles a smile out of San, whose shoulders relax a little. 

“Sit down.” Hongjoong says, patting the empty spot on the bench. “How did you do it?”

“Do what?”

Hongjoong fixes San with a withering look. “Steal your supposed brother’s security ID to break into a NASA facility and destroy one of their training simulators.”

There’s a smile that threatens to creep onto San’s face and if Hongjoong was a better role model he’d have felt the need to scold the teenager for it. 

He doesn't.

“I just swapped it for mine when he wasn’t looking.” San replies nonchalantly, like it was something so simple a mere child could do it and in fact, did. “He’s been so focused on the mission's projects, I figured he wasn’t going to notice for awhile-”

“Wait a second,” Hongjoong interrupts. “When was he not looking? He’s always looking. He looks at everything!”

San rolls his eyes. “It’s called being obsessed and hyper fixated actually. He gets into these zones and forgets everything else. You could set yourself on fire in front of him and he might not even notice.”

Hongjoong frowns at the thought of the other man burning himself out for this mission, only to front a meeting for something he didn’t even do. And yet, as he looks at the culprit beside him, he can’t really summon up anger or blame either. Not when he did the exact same thing himself a few years ago with far more expensive consequences.

“Why did you do it San?”

The young trainee shrugs. 

“San…”

There’s silence for a minute. It’s not as uncomfortable as Hongjoong was expecting. San plays with his restless hands before finally speaking again. 

“You said it could be done. I wanted to try and do it like you showed us but it never worked. I kept getting it wrong, over and over again.” 

“You’re a level 1 trainee. You’re not supposed to be getting every simulation right. That’s not the point of the training. That’s what the exams are for.”

“Well, I almost had it before the stupid thing started smoking and dying on me.” 

Against his better judgment, Hongjoong laughs. San, sensing he wasn’t going to get scolded again, chuckles along cautiously.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.” Hongjoong replies.

“Did they fire you again?”

Hongjoong shakes his head, unsure what to really say. "No, not quite."

"Oh good." San breathes out a sigh of relief. "So I didn't get you or Commander Choi in trouble? Will you still teach us?"

"We'll be fine but you got demoted San. I'm not sure who will be teaching your level now."

"I know." San mumbles miserably. "But if you had free time..."

"If I had free time and it was legally approved, then sure."

"But even if it wasn't technically legally approved-"

"You really are trying to get me fired again aren't you?"

***

It’s Doctor Park who finds them in the end.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.” San replies at the same time Hongjoong nods, each unsure who the question was meant for. 

“Looks like there will be a lot of new changes soon.” Doctor Park says as he sits down on the bench. “For all of us.”

“I know.” San mumbles. “It’s so stupid I have to train with the level 2 kids. They’re so slow. I deserve to be with the level 1’s!”

“You are still a kid and you’re lucky they didn’t kick you off the program altogether.”

“I’m their best pilot!” San exclaims, looking at the only older brother he’s ever known. “Seonghwa, I was just trying to be better, I swear. That’s what they said they wanted! It’s so stupid I have to be held back for doing exactly what they wanted."

He has a point, Hongjoong thinks.

“That’s not the point.” Doctor Park says as he lets out a quiet weary sigh. It comes out so soft that Hongjoong has a hard time believing this is the same man who interrogated him a few months ago and won.

“Is….the Professor angry with me?” San asks tentatively.

“Angry?” Doctor Park smirks as he looks over. “He laughed for multiple minutes when I told him what you did. I guess breaking rules is in this family’s DNA.”

“But I’m adopted.” San points out. 

“Then it’s all my fault you’re a lunatic. You were raised by wolves and I’m the wolf mother.” 

The image of Doctor Park playing mother wolf to a wild teenage San flashes through Hongjoong’s mind and he can't to stop the bubble of laughter from escaping. They both look across at him in question and only slight judgement. 

“Um, I think we’re all to blame for this lunatic, Doctor Park. He’s been raised by a whole pack of wolves.” Hongjoong says with a chuckle. “I’m not exactly the best role model NASA has available.”

“Oh I am very aware of that.”

"No, he’s awesome Seonghwa!" San surges forward to object. "He taught me how to-“

“Anyway,” Hongjoong interrupts hastily, kicking at the teenager's foot to stop the incriminating rambling, even if he was warmed by San’s defence of him. If Doctor Park noticed, he doesn’t say anything and Hongjoong takes the opportunity to change the subject. 

“How is the professor? He didn’t come to the meeting.”

“My father was not feeling well this morning. He’s been updated on the outcomes.”

It’s an answer that is deliberately brief but firm enough not to invite any more questions. It does nothing to reassure him but Hongjoong doesn’t miss the microsecond of sadness that flashes across Doctor Park’s face, it doesn’t linger, few emotions do, and before anything more can be said, the impassive neutral mask is back on. 

“Please let him know I hope he recovers soon.” Hongjoong says.

“I will.” 

“Do you need-“

“We’re fine.”

“Okay.” Hongjoong nods, not pushing the matter. 

The air between them grows awkward, San must sense it because he’s looking between the two adults on either side of him, his prodigious mind no doubt whirring furiously as it tries to figure out the cause.

Not wanting to make it more awkward, Hongjoong stands up abruptly, nearly bumping into Doctor Park, who also stands up abruptly, both clearly having the same idea of ending this conversation but simply walking away. 

“I better get going.”

“So should we. Come on San, time to go home.”

San’s confusion clears enough for a mischievous expression to form on his face. “Can I drive?”

Both adults turn to him in unison. “NO.”

“I know how!” San cries.

Doctor Park rolls his eyes and nudges his adopted brother towards the car park. “Still no.”

“What am I going to do all day?" The teenager whines. "I don’t want to read and study anymore Seonghwa! It's so boring.”

And it’s then that the circus in Hongjoong’s brain spits out a thought he may live to regret. 

“Hey, if you want him to let off some steam, he’s welcome to join me on the farm with my brothers. We’ll be fixing some tractors today and could always use a hand. It might keep him out of trouble for awhile. Give you some peace and quiet?”

Doctor Park stops dead in his tracks, eyes uncertain but thoughtful as he considers the offer, no doubt overthinking about the 14 million possible ways it could all go wrong. Especially when San has just freshly broken a 10 million dollar government machine. 

The young criminal in question perks up like a puppy being offered a walk. 

“Wait, I can drive tractors! I know how. Seonghwa can I go?” 

“You don’t even officially have your driver’s licence yet.” Doctor Park points out. 

“Oh come on, it’s a tractor! You can't even speed in it.”

Hongjoong chooses his next words carefully, not wanting to overstep his boundaries or undermine the doctor’s parenting but if anyone knows a how to depressurise a hyperactive teenage genius, it's him.

“I have about 4 hectares of land out there, plenty of space, even if they crash. The tractors are really old and slow. My brother’s know how to handle themselves around them safely. I’ll be there to watch the whole time. I won’t let him get hurt.”

Doctor Park is silent as he looks from one pilot to the other. It's a piercing and uncomfortable gaze, heavy with both exasperation and adoration as it lands on San.

“Alright fine but I don't trust either of you with machinery right now. I will be coming along to supervise."

[gaytotaldrama]

[Request] Alejandro has to explain to his important diplomat father why he frenched a pineapple on international tv, got kicked in the kiwis (also on international tv), then vanished off the face of the earth for a good year.

also on my ao3!

Practically the second Alejandro emerges from the humiliating send-off that had been the Flush of Shame, his dad's calling him. On a hotel phone. On a hotel phone in Miami, of all the God-forsaken places in the world. It's a testament to the Burromuerto name that it'd been so easy for his father to find him - but where was all that during the year Alejandro's spent inside a robot suit?!

And the reception is horrible, too. Naturalmente.

"So." His father's voice crackles through the line in his usual clipped Spanish, formal and curt. "You're alive, then."

"Well, yes," Alejandro returns, furrowing his brows. "Did you think I was dead?"

A non-committal grunt. "The volcano in Hawaii burnt you to a crisp."

"Yes, but then - "

"Then you failed to win the million dollars. Twice now, if I'm not mistaken."

Alejandro rolls his eyes, thankful his father can't see him do it. "Why should it matter to you? You've got your own money."

"It doesn't. What matters is my own blood soiling the family name on international television for the entire world to see."

"Soil - ? I've been one of Total Drama's most ambitious competitors!" he exclaims, irked at the erasure. "I was the master schemer of the third season! You saw!"

"I didn't watch," his father says, which, oh. Alejandro hadn't been aware of that. It's expected, no doubt about it, but it's different, hearing its confirmation. "Your brothers have kept me updated on all of your shortcomings."

"Oh, have they, now," Alejandro seethes.

"You allowed yourself to become much too cocky. Toying with all the girls' hearts, so certain you'd win. Then you let that little Asian witch outsmart you. Kicking you while your guard was down. What in God's name made you fail that way, Alejandro?" 

"Heather is not a witch," he fumes back. "Only I get to call her that. And so what if she won? She didn't get to keep the money, either, not after the eruption."

His father scoffs. "You think that's what matters? No. What matters is the humiliation you've caused us all, Alejandro."

"You already said that," Alejandro deadpans. "If you're going to ruthlessly insult me, at least have the originality not to be repetitive."

"Oh, so you're giving me cheek now, hm?" His father sounds pissed, which is exactly what Alejandro was going for. "Two pathetic stints on a damn reality show where you french kiss a pineapple and you think you're king of the world! Why I ever bothered to have a third son is lost on me, I must admit."

"I've been asking that same question for years."

A snort. "Well, if you think you're welcome at Christmas, you are gravely mistaken!!

"That's what you say," Alejandro points out. "Good luck getting that past Mom." And then he hangs up, jamming the phone back in its charging port, so his father won't have the satisfaction of getting in the last word.

He lays back on the scratchy pillow, folding his arms behind his head and thinking, contemplating, looking up at the mildewy ceiling. He wishes he could say that his father's words stopped hurting him a long time ago, but the hollowness in his heart tells him otherwise. Twenty years of trying to impress the man. Two decades of failure.

His dear mamá will stick up for him, he knows, but even so. It may be a good idea to throw together a different plan for the winter holidays. And also, you know. Find a more permanent place to stay.

An idea strikes, nearly wiping the previous conversation from his brain entirely. He reaches again for the telephone, entering the digits carefully with the calloused pad of his thumb. Smirking, he presses Call. He knew he still remembered Heather's number...