#and Tara and Willow have the divorce talk

[magpie-trove]

Pls Mr Giles come back sir we need you

[fandomtherapy44]

Stolen Moments Spike x reader Oneshot!

Paring: Spike x reader

Warnings: SMUT, language, small spoilers for season 5

Summary: Y/n and Spike have some stolen moments on the couch.

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WC: 2,646

Hey, y'all, I wanted to try something a little different. Plus, I have been obsessed with BTVS and especially Spike, so I created a fic for him. I got the inspo for this from this fic, Movie Night at the Summers Residence, so you should go check it out!

My life has never been… easy to say but it’s not like I didn’t have a support system I had my mother and my two sisters. I remember the day coming home from the orphanage and the feeling of comfort and love came over my body for the first time in my life. From that day I was Y/n Summers. I didn’t know life could be more fulfilling till I got my baby sister Buffy then my mom had Dawn a couple of years later. Even as a four-year-old, I knew I loved being an older sister.

So the day Buffy sacrificed herself to save the world again I had felt like I had failed not just Buffy but also my mom and Dawn. So I threw myself fully into being Dawn’s guardian the one she deserved, because like Dad would lift a finger. Motherfucker didn’t even call to talk to us about Mom’s passing it’s like as soon as the divorce was finalized he forgot he was still a father. Our friends did everything to help Dawn, Giles helped her get on track with her schoolwork, Willow and Tara would teach her a few simple spells, Anya and Xander would take her to do fun things to distract her from the heavy grief that both of us were going through.

But Spike crazily enough has been the hugest supporter of Dawn and me. It’s crazy because if you told me four years ago that Spike is reformed and that you trust him to watch your little sister I would laugh at your funny joke. He stays with her all night when I have to work the night shifts unfortunately I get more money from those. And somehow he and I built a friendship through our grief and just wanting someone to be there.

“Hey, how was it?” I asked quietly seeing Dawn asleep on the floor clearly falling asleep during the movie they were watching.

“Uhh, just a little scared,” Spike responded looking at Dawn. A mini heart attack goes through me and he sees my face.

“Sorry, I mean from the horror movie.”

I drop my bag and sit next to him on the couch. “Lead with that next time would you.” I joked and taped his arm. “And I thought we said no scary movies.” I gave him a knowing annoyed look. I can see him and how he's trying to come up with a good reason.

“Ah you know the little bit she is very convening with those damn puppy dog eyes.” He replied turning his body to me and trying that half-assed excuse on me and I had to admit it was pretty cute. 

“Ok fine you're off the hook but no more Micahel Myers at least till she’s sixteen… in half.”

“Isn’t that a little excessive luv?” He called me out while leaning back on the couch arm.

“I know I know I just want to protect her as much as possible as long as possible with how much she has lost in just the last three months I want to protect her while I still can.” I walked over and stroked her hair. I glanced up at him and in his eyes saw my earnestness and truth. 

“Can you carry her to bed I’ll pop open some beers I think we both could use one.” I ended with a smirk.

“Of course and for me-”

“In a bottle, I know spike.” I giggled and walked to the kitchen while he carried her to bed.

In an hour we were both delightfully buzzed our bodies across from each other on the couch and I got to rant to him.

“So get this I walked over to get this guy his coffee and not even a minute later he demanded it again calling me lazy, like I'm sorry sir if I’m not the flash.” We both laughed at that and almost spilled our beers.

“Bloody Hell Luv I’m sorry you have to deal with that.” He sips his beer looking in it.

And I looked in mine like it was a pond a movie character thinking about a decision but really it was still just beer. “Yeah well it pays the bills so in my book it’s the best job in the world.”

“You know I could still help.” He lifts his head to meet mine and his eyes bored into mine.

“Spike I really appreciate the offer but I just can’t take money from you, you already do so much for Dawn and me if I took the money I would feel like I was taking advantage and I couldn't do that, not to you.” I fiddled with the bottle thinking about it and before I knew he had moved right in front of me.

“Luv listen to me, if I can help you not feel like doom is around the corner then that way I can feel that I’m more than what my title is you make me feel like I’m more than a vampire, a monster you make me feel like a man.” He lifted my chin with his hand and I know he’s telling the truth.

“Plus I wouldn’t mind being taken “advantage” of.” He smirked. Leave it to Spike to flirt when things get a little too real.

“Oh really.” I played-shoved him and he caught my hand. And we were left with a sizzling tension between us that had also been building with the friendship. He slowly leaned in looking to me if it was okay. And I nodded yes.

Our lips met in the middle and it was everything I had been dreaming about. It started out slowly but there was a certain desperation behind it. He gently grabbed the back of my head to cradle it. 

SMUT 18+ ...... Below cut

“So should I go or…” He questioned and I grabbed him back into me.

“Spike I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time I don’t about you.” I breathed heavily.

He flipped us over to where he was on top of me and I was below. “Been dreaming of it, sweetheart.” He then pressed his lips again but this time more intense. Before I know it his tongue met mine.

“Mhhh spike.” I moaned between the tongues.

“Not so loud pet Dawn is right upstairs.” His mouth traveled down my neck slowly too slowly for my liking. I grab his shirt.

“Spike…” He chuckles at that.

“I didn’t know you were this desperate pet but have patience, I want to savor this moment.” He goes to remove my shirt. “This okay?” I just nod. He unbuttons it and just looks down at me.

I get self-conscious and hold my arms over my chest. He gently pulls them away. “Y/n you are beautiful no need to be shy but if you do want to cover up I'm fine with that too.” He whispered.

“It’s okay, it’s just I haven't done this for a… while.” I was a little embarrassed to say.

“Me too Luv, so we’ll go at this at our pace okay? I nod and take off my bra.

“Oh, the wait was definitely worth it.” He scanned down and made me feel… sexy which I haven't felt in a while between the sweat build-up and stress.

“Oh spike-” I get stopped by him sucking on my sweet spot. He goes harder and it starts to pulse with a little pain but soothed by him licking it. His hands go to my strap pulling it down I’m so distracted by the bite that I didn’t even feel him fondling my nipple. And it feels… electrifying. I sit up and fully remove my bra. I then glanced at him and annoyingly he still had his shirt on. 

“I think this is a little unfair don’t you think?” I crossed my arms.

“You're right Pet.” He pulled it off like it was a million degrees and was just waiting to shed his clothes. His chest was pale with a slight pink to it from us being like this his abs were well-defined and went into a sharp v-line. I don’t notice I'm staring.

“See something you like?” He smirked knowing the effect he was having.

“Oh just kiss me, dummy.” I pull him back down and we start to get into a rhythm fast-paced and arousing. Our chests blending turning us both on. His hands then drift down to my pants.

“How about we get these annoying things out of the way huh?” He asks and I just nod. His hands go to my waist and I help him shimmy out of my pants. He continues kissing me and his fingers go to my panties. I gasp into his mouth at the sudden contact. Feeling my wetness seeping through the fabric.

“All this for me huh baby?” He grunted like to me. Then his fingers go up and down my slit.

“Uh-huh.” I tried to get out. Then, his finger slowly goes in. “Spike…” The finger makes circles in my pussy. I am trying not to release just at that, and then suddenly, he adds in another. He starts to pump in and out. His thick fingers were rubbing against my soft walls, looking to my face, seeing my reaction and liking it.

“You like that?” He speeds up.

“Yes, Spike yes.” I moaned out he was going in between slow and fast seeing how I reacted to what he was doing well, studying me. It was heaven, in the past guys would barely warm me up and then pull down their pants thinking that would be enough. Spike was like a fresh breath of air.

He started to go more slow noticing I was getting closer not wanting to overwhelm my nerves. And my body was moving with him becoming one. 

“Spike I’m getting close.” His hand ramps up now pounding my pussy. “Ahh Spike!” 

“Let go just let go.” And I did I came all over his hand.

I breathed in deeply trying to recover from the best finger bang I've ever gotten. “Fuck spike you're… good at that.” I climb on top of him going back to making out.

“Yeah?” I start to grind down on him as an answer.

I gently grabbed his face. “Yes, you are.” I stand up and take down my panties.

“Holy… I think I believe there is a God.” He stood up quickly and pulled down his pants and underwear. His shaft springs forward and it is big and bulging the same color as the rest of him just a little redder. I step up and handled it and start to pump it.

“Would you like me to return the favor?” I whisper in his ear and nip his earlobe.

“Ahh Luv… I would but I don’t think I would last and I’m just dying to get inside of you.” he could barely get out finding it hard to focus with my hand pumping him.

“Okay then sit down.” he backs down on the couch. Watching my body strut over to him I straddle him and our bodies meet fully nude. We start to kiss again and get the familiar rhythm like we were meant to be here tonight. His teeth nip down on my lip and the tongue licks it. The air is thick with lust and emotions like I've never felt before. I hover over his shaft and start to grind on it. Getting us both ready with the slick. I lift up and get his shaft and slowly sink in. 

“Spike”

“Y/n” 

Both of us feel euphoric, I have to stay in this spot because he is so big that my walls have to get used to it the cum from before helping it be more comfortable for me. 

“Let me know when I can start moving kay?” He said trying to hold back, making sure this would be amazing for me too.

“Kay.” I breathed out. I rolled my hips to test the waters and both of us liked it. I lift up and slide down gently. He meets my hips and we go together. Breathing up and down together. He juts up into me and makes me lose my balance for a second but he catches me. His shaft goes faster into me.

He flipped us over again so he had more control and I didn’t mind it. My legs wrap his back and my hands scratch into his back. He starts to pound in faster and faster having the stamina of a fucking stallion. He then hits my G spot and stars. He knew how to use what God had given him. I pull him closer and he licks my bite again.

“So bloody pretty.” He heard my moans. 

“Spike… need… more!” He gets my hint and his fingers go to stroke my clit to really get me there. 

“Getting close Luv?” I nod.

He pulls my head to meet his and our eyes meet. “Ready?” He rubs quicker and quicker.

“Ahh! Ahh!” And obsolete explosion both of us came together. We breathe in together not believing what just transpired. He slips out and pushes himself next to me on the small couch barely keeping both of us on. 

“That was-”

“Amazing.” I finished.

“Yeah bloody amazing.” 

I then slipped off into sleep being the most at peace I have felt in a while.

My eyes blink open it being early morning. I then remembered what happened last night and looked to my side and Spike was sleeping there soundly. It felt almost… surreal like this could be regular. I then hear the shower going on upstairs which is weird because Dawn should be sleeping-. SHIT ITS A SCHOOL DAY! She will be downstairs in five minutes. I then notice the state of the two of us.

“Spike Spike! Wake up!” He woke with alertness and fell off the couch.

“What what is attacking us!?” 

“Nothing, Dawn is going to be downstairs now in three minutes!” He then comes to the same realization. 

“Oh SHIT!” 

“Yeah! So come on get your clothes on I have to make a quick breakfast for her.” I throw my clothes on and run to the kitchen. Spike goes to the backdoor but before he leaves he turns to me.

“I don’t regret what happened last night, do you?” Those damn blue eyes begged for an answer. I didn't but I couldn't get into this right now.

“Uhh We’ll talk later okay.” I responded while flipping the eggs not being able to tell to his face. I can tell he wants to keep going but knows he can’t so he throws on a blanket over his head and run out the backdoor. And not a minute later Dawn is in front of me.

“Hey did Spike sleep here last night?” She questioned innocently. I was pouring orange juice and dropped the glass.

“What what no no why ask?” I quickly picked up the glass and avoided her eyes.

“Just he left his lighter on the couch, you okay?” She saw my behavior.

“Yup just tired you know, well would you look at the time you should be off to school!” I pick her up backpack and lunchpail and practically push her out the door.

“Are you sure you okay Y/n because I can-”

“No! I mean I'm okay now go that brain needs knowledge.” I smiled and waved to her as she walked off super confused about her sister’s erratic behavior. I closed the door finally being able to breathe. I walk to the couch looking at the tangled blankets and remembering what only really happened a couple of hours ago and spot the silver lighter and pick it up.

“What did I do?” Did we ruin a friendship or start something more?

[thepunkmuppet]

have you thought about anyiles because I have Thought About Anyiles. strap the fuck in guys

first question. why does anya like xander?? like obviously anybody can be attracted to anybody, that makes perfect sense and is fine, but WHY does she love him and pursue a relationship with him?? she’s not actually a teenager, they have literally nothing in common! he makes it very very clear that he doesn’t understand her at all, not to mention constantly belittling and undermining her. when he tries to be “helpful” and teach her social skills and cues, he only does it because it embarrasses him, not to actually help her understand, and is just so fucking condescending and rude!!!! (can you tell that autistic/neurodivergent-coded anya in relation to the way xander treats her makes me mad??)

basically, regardless of how much I just don’t really like it, I genuinely never understood why that relationship ever even happened.

anya and giles however. it’s not necessarily my favourite ship in the fandom as it is, but the idea of what the show would have been had it been canon instead of xanya makes me love it more and more by the second.

let’s talk about canon moments. they have a connection! when they bicker, buffy compares them to her divorced parents, he calls her “dear” at one point for literally no reason, and the biggest one is of course tabula rasa. sure they pieced together the context that they ran the shop together and then just ran with it, assuming they were a couple, but tara and willow were fully attracted to each other and seemed to somehow know that they had a connection, as did xander and willow. xander and anya barely even speak to each other, while anya and giles fall into the role of a couple so easily, kissing passionately without even breaking a sweat

so just think about an alternate version of the show, where instead of liking xander for absolutely no reason, anya pursues giles.

they are both incredibly knowledgeable on demons and history, they both have crazy evil pasts, they both have dry senses of humour, they’re both way more powerful than they come across. and just the poetry of it - giles was the one to destroy her necklace and essentially curse her with humanity. him being the one to make her fall in love with humanity and want to be human again is so FUCKING BEAUTIFUL! and just the idea of exploring his trauma around jenny, unwillingness to love again, etc.

also ik it makes perfect sense for xander’s character so I don’t have beef with it from a writers perspective, but it needs to be said. GILES WOULD NEVER LEAVE HER AT THE ALTAR

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Saturday, April 20th

Wesley: *What* are you doing!?! This book is twelve centuries old! Harmony: Okay. So it's not like I messed up a new one.

~~Disharmony~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Do You Want to Play a Game? by NotASlayer (Anya & Dawn, T)

Freedom by Enigmatist (Angel, not rated)

[Text chat between Buffybot and Anya] by scooby-group-texts (not rated)

Angel kisses Cordy back in Parting Gifts and it changes everything by vampandvisiongirl (not rated)

[Chaptered Fiction]

With Arms Wide Open, Chapter 32 by jaybird023 (Buffy/Giles, E)

Thirty-ish Days (and Thirty-ish Years), Chapter 27 by Dynapink (Buffy/Giles, T)

A Reincarnation in Sunnydale, Chapter 37 by DracoRim98 (Buffy/Angel, M)

Gemini, Chapter 6 by BuildMeUpButtercup_x (Buffy/Angel, M)

Wish Granted, Chapter 8 by faewm (Anyanka, Harry Potter crossover, T)

An odd Couple of grumpy old Brits, Chapter 13 by julikobold (Giles & Spike, T)

Rebehold the Stars (Love from the Other Side of the Apocalypse), Chapter 13 by asokatanos (Emryslin) (Buffy/Spike, T)

Raven, Chapter 12 by sparrow2000 (Xander & Spike, G)

Greatest Love Story Postlude, Chapter 14 by FalseGinger (Angel/Spike, M)

With Sprinkles, Chapter 40 by dogbertcarroll, Narsil (Xander, multiple crossovers, M)

The Stars to Hold Our Destiny, Chapter 12 by Hermione2be (Buffy, Star Trek: Strange New Worlds crossover, G)

You’re my always, Chapter 5 (complete!) by ronanceisrxmance (Willow/Tara, T)

Object of Affection, Chapter 2 by felixsfishnets (Xander/Spike, E)

Highlands and Tropical Islands, Chapter 2 by QuillBard (Buffy/Faith, M)

The Scoobies and The Party, Chapter 2 by StrangerThings_Writer011 (Scoobies, Stranger Things crossover, G)

She's in Parties, Chapter 1 by betweenfactandbreakfast (Spike/Drusilla, E)

Surviving Together, Chapter 18 by ionlylikebadboys (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only)

Love Lives Here, Chapter 51 by Passion4Spike (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

Meow, Chapter 5 by CheekyKitten (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

Afterburn: In The Dark, Chapter 2 by Melme1325 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

What Love Looks Like, Chapter 2 by DeamonQueen (Buffy/Spike, R)

Going Astral, Chapter 1 by Geliot99 (Buffy/Spike, R)

Out For A Walk... Bitch, Chapters 14-15 by MaggieLaFey (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only)

Early One Morning, Chapter 34 by all choseny (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

Lie to Me, Chapter 24 by In Mortal (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only)

Cradle of Love, Chapters 2-3 by Lilacsandorangeblossoms (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: Buffy ensemble, Buffy & Angel by Hippano (worksafe)

Artwork: Dusk Summers by isevery0nehereverystoned (worksafe)

Artwork: Same robin and nikki doodles by aa-arttss (worksafe)

Artwork: Buffy by deathoftheartist (worksafe)

Comic: Willow vs Ulquiorra Page 4 written by MattanzaMFedora & illustrated by RichCass on DeviantArt by MattanzaMafiaFedora (worksafe)

Fanvid: Cordelia&Angel | The 1 by 1SnoWhiteQueen1

Fanvid: Faith & Angel || Slayer and Vampire [Bring me back to life] by Charmed 567

Fanvid: Giles/Buffy - When you find me by Kiss The Librarian

Fanvid: I Wanna Be Your Slave | Buffy & Spike by Werepaca

[Reviews & Recaps]

Video: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 2 Review! (Spoilers!) by SundayScariesReview

Video: Doublemeat Palace-Slayer Sunday by Jane Talks Buffy

Podcast: Episode 26: Buffy The Vampire Slayer Discussion Part 1 by Friends Talking Nerdy

Podcast: Help S7 E4 Buffy and the Art of Story Podcast by Lisa M. Lilly

Podcast: Language in Buffy the Vampire Slayer by A Girl, A Guy and A Buffy Podcast

[Recs]

Vid rec: Final Hour (tribute video) [old version/2011] by Narvinek recced by I_want_to_believe_99

[Fandom Discussions]

Season 5 literally could have given us insane lilah and wesley divorce by all-seeing-ifer

Buffy Summers for the character asks by laufire

Angel btvs for the character ask game by laufire

Character breakdown: Cordelia Chase by nicnacsnonsense

the scene where Faith in Buffy’s body seduces and has sex with Riley by nicnacsnonsense

They have Cassie tell the audience/Spike that Buffy will tell him she loves him by raisedbythetv89

The First's Plan by NoShip

Rewatch thoughts and questions continued by multiple posters

Why Giles wants Spike dead continued by multiple posters

Spike and the first continued by multiple posters

What is something you dislike about your favorite character? by The Whirlwind

How would you 'fix' Angelus on Angel? by ethihoff

What was the original plan for [AtS] Season 4? by CuriousHedgehog636

Why are they still SINGING??? by Syn_33

How come Superstar be better rated than Beer Bad? by lua121

Lindsey and Faith parallel by IntelligentPumpkin74

Xander and his need for a woman by Iluthradanar

[1/22] What's your favorite episode 1 across all seasons? by jonaskoelker

Watching Buffy for the first time - what makes the slayer special? by UltimateEel

Are slayers genetic?? by Grocery-Full

Rewatching as an adult [Giles in OMWF] by MiniKb

This Year's Girl - Why did Buffy come crushing through the window? by brwitch

If you could skip only ONE episode per whole rewatch, which one would it be and why? by DistributionRight620

what are answers from Buffy [things in canon you pretend are not] by Independent-Rise2480

What are some of the worst line-reads in the series? by To55ursalad

Man I really miss Doyle, I wonder how different the show would've been if he had still stayed on for it by AxelNoir

Things you noticed upon rewatch that you missed before (non-verbal only) by dragonsrawesomesauce

Video: Why Did Joyce Have To Get A Brain Tumor In Season 5 Of Buffy The Vampire Slayer? by CrasHNburN

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[firemanwhenthefloodsrollback]

things i would have liked to see in season 7 as resolution to character arcs

gonna start by saying i genuinely don't dislike season seven. sure i find the potentials annoying, which is a universal emotion everyone who's ever seen the show shares, but I really do like it overall. aside from the potentials and that one english accent that poisons my dreams every night, there isn't much i'd remove but there is stuff i'd love to add to make the season three times as long. including:

- i'd like to see buffy reading or doing something casually academic. after dropping out of college and not being able to rejoin in season six, it wasn't realistic or necessary for her to rejoin college in season seven, but i'd have liked to see something. buffy was clever and loved learning when she didn't have pressure on her or other places to be, and in a season about her growing up, learning how to balance putting pressure on herself and knowing her strengths, one scene of her losing herself in a book or enjoying signing up to a casual evening class could have been such a nice tiny moment. an older, mature verison of buffy could read for fun and not always be running late for a test or failing to do homework for other people.

- willow makes practical amends in some way. i love willow's character arc but i'd have liked to see more than her visiting tara's grave once and learning a lot in england. i'd like for this to include magic now that she knows magic has to be a part of her life going forwards, maybe she does some good works in tara's name magically around the city she tried to destroy.

- characters other than willow mentioning tara, and tbh willow mentioning her more. tara was both an important person in everyone's lives and a powerful symbol of what so many characters were lacking in season six and aiming for in season seven. she's all of your patron saints. acknowledge her.

- something with xander's family. not a neat bow on it but some kind of resolution to his relationship with them, either a positive moment with some member of his family in some way or him divorcing himself from them and confidently approaching becoming his own person. i don't want hells bells to be the last word we got on his relationship with his family.

- chat about other characters who have died or left. in a series about understanding your place in the world and going full circle, we needed to talk about more than just joyce. i want to see poignant conversations about kendra, ms calendar, oz, cordelia, faith (before she turns up, like they weren't expecting her soo).

[beatriceeagle]

@scarletwinterraven asked: Of the shows on my list, what are my favorite ships and why?

ATLA: Zuko/Mai. I wouldn’t have called myself an ATLA shipper, but on my most recent rewatch I found myself really fascinated by the Zuko/Mai dynamic and by Mai as like, a person, generally, and I actually have most of a fic about them written. I just like them both so much individually, and also, there’s something deeply interesting to me about the balancing act that they must have had to perform throughout their adolescence, having a crush around Azula and all that palace intrigue. And can you imagine being Mai, and having a crush on the crown prince once day, and then the next day he’s been banished forever, and his sister is still ostensibly your best friend? And knowing that any amount of emotion you display over that is power that you’re giving her over you? And then he comes back after three years away? I would so desperately love to have seen their reunion scene.

Angel/Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Wesley/Lilah. It’s technically an Angel ship, but Angel should really be on the list, anyway and also my GOD I love that ship so much. They were the first couple I ever shipped, which, uh, probably tells you something about me. I don’t want to see them end up together, or anything, I just enjoy them so damn much. Also Willow/Tara of course, but I don’t wanna talk about it.

Community: Britta/Jeff. Also not in an endgame way, more in like an, “I really enjoy every time these two people are paired on screen together” kind of way, but they obviously shouldn’t be together, that would be a trainwreck. (I also thought Britta/Troy was very sweet.)

ER: Carter/Abby. They’re one of my ride-or-die OTPs, and I will NEVER be over the bullshit that show pulled with this ship. She left him for Luka? LUKA? HOW BORING CAN A PERSON POSSIBLY BE?

Farscape: So like. Is it possible to friendship ship people? Like, not in a BroTP way, but like, specifically, there’s a kind of dynamic that I very rarely see in fiction that I can get REALLY into, where two people are best friends who love each other incredibly deeply and want the world for each other, and who have a platonic relationship, but there’s a lot of sexual tension there and they both know it, but it would be an incredibly bad idea to follow through on it, so they don’t, or maybe they do for a while but then they stop, but there is a definite sexual component to the relationship, but ultimately it’s more friendship than anything else, just… complicated by this other thing. I fall head over heels for relationships like that, and in that sense, you could say I “ship” John/Chiana.

Girl Meets World: I am. Sigh. A Lucas/Maya shipper. Don’t look at me.

Legend of Korra: Korrasami, obvs.

Leverage: Hardison/Parker/Eliot TIL MY DYING DAY, BAYBEE.

The Magicians: Quentin/Eliot is still a great ship, and you will pry it from my cold dead hands, motherfuckers.

NMTD/LoLiLo: Pedrazar  :) :) :)

One Day at a Time: Uh, okay, so here’s the thing, I don’t SHIP Penelope/Schneider, but I ABSOLUTELY see the chemistry and I think it’s HYSTERICAL, and because I am secretly, in my heart of hearts, kind of a troll, I’m so excited by the fact that it’s there and the show is getting another season and somehow they’re going to have to deal with it. Does that count?

Parks and Rec: Ben/Leslie are a weird exception to almost everything that I normally ship, but whatever, I love them. Gimme all the wholesome nerds in love and supporting each other.

Schitt’s Creek: I “ship” David/Stevie in all the same ways and for all the same reasons that I do John/Chiana.

Scooby Doo Mystery Incorporated: Fred/traps.

Star Trek: Tom/B’Elanna is probably the ship I have loved the most that has ended up being endgame, and I can’t believe that it was on freaking Voyager. There’s something about the way that they are both such incredible disasters, and they are both kind of incredibly hard to be in a relationship with, but also they both try so hard to be there for each other regardless, that really works for me. Every relationship should ideally switch back and forth between insulting each other, sincerely reassuring each other that you’ll be there during times of trouble, and encouraging each other to commit acts of ecoterrorism.

(I’m also really into Picard/Crusher but specifically as a weird, tense, unconsummated thing. Like hell yeah, TNG, show me a future where Picard and Crusher are already divorced. That’s the good stuff!)

Superstore: JONAH/AMY OH MY GOD. These two are a disaster in probably a bad way, but there’s something so real about Superstore, and something so delightful about their chemistry, and again, I’m just such a sucker for people who can’t get their shit together, and like. They had sex for the first time when she was pregnant with her ex-husband’s child? Their life is a series of awkward, undernegotiated attempts to merge their extraordinarily incompatible contexts? I just feel like Jonah/Amy takes the standard trappings of the Mike Schur style grounded soulmate workplace romance and turns it into this slightly sordid, unwholesome, not always good thing, where the fact that they’re opposites who attract and work together leads them to have real problems, like, a lot of the time. But also (because I promise I’m not a complete downer) that relationship just feels so fucking lived in, those people just feel so detailed. The joy they take in each other feels equally real.

Teen Wolf: If you’ve gotten all the way to the bottom of this list, surely you can guess that I am in love with Stiles/Malia. FOR FUCKS SAKE. They lose their virginity to each other in the basement of the mental hospital that they’re both staying in while dealing with their overwhelming trauma. After knowing each other for like five minutes. And then they turn that into a relationship. Those two are in no position to be dating anyone, let alone each other, I love them so much.

As you can see, I find it very difficult to ship like a normal person, and therefore I am perennially frustrated. (Other ships I have loved: Jane/Michael from Jane the Virgin; Clarke/Lexa from The 100; oh, and I wrote what I believe to be the single most popular Tony/Nebula fic in all of Avengers fandom.)

My migraine is getting better, but feel free to keep sending me meta asks!

[ettadunham]

A Buffy rewatch 5x19 Tough Love

aka you are not immune to… internalized bi erasure?

Welcome to this dailyish (weekly? bi-weekly?) text post series where I will rewatch an episode of Buffy and go on an impromptu rant about it for an hour. Is it about one hyperspecific thing or twenty observations? 10 or 3k words? You don’t know! I don’t know!!! In this house we don’t know things.

And in today’s episode Tara’s not perfect and gets her mind sucked out for it, we kick off the season’s multi-episode finale arc by revealing Dawn to Glory, and we draw some weird parallels between two of our dynamics. Perhaps mostly though, I’ll just talk about Willow’s sexuality, because at some point, we need to properly address that elephant in the room.

Okay, so, let’s just kick this off. If you’ve been in this fandom long enough, you’ve been inevitably exposed to the discourse of Willow’s sexuality. And you might be asking now… what’s the big deal anyway? Isn’t art up to interpretation? Wasn’t that one of my main motivations for this rewatch? Why does it matter that parts of the audience ascribe different labels to Willow?

And well… that’s valid, but it also misses a crucial element of our media, one that I alluded to in my rant about Whedon character deaths. Art doesn’t happen in a vacuum. And the significance of that is only amplified for folks and groups whose experiences aren’t recognized or seen by society in the first place.

To them it will matter whether or not someone recognizes a character by a certain label. Because a refusal to do so feels like an erasure of their own identities. That’s what makes this whole discussion complicated in the first place.

Now, am I the best person to do a deep dive on this? No. Especially not in one of these barely proof-read long rant posts. I’m sure you can find much better sources, so please do that. But it’d feel disingenuous to ignore it too, so I’m just gonna address it to the best of my abilities as well as provide my own in-universe interpretation of what it could mean for the characters.

Great. Now for that pesky discourse.

Personally my go-to analogy to describe it is the classic Shrek onion one.

You see, you peel away a layer of the Willow’s sexuality onion… and it’s still an onion. You peel away all the layers, you chop it up, and sure, it remains an onion, but now everything’s a mess and you’re crying.

The issue is that you kind of need to peel those layers away anyway if you want to truly divorce yourself from the binary thinking that the show itself often engages with. Which is what’s arguably gotten us into this mess in the first place.

Because however you view Willow’s sexuality, you can’t deny that the show is doing a lousy job defining it. Willow does identify as gay/lesbian as of 5x11 and through the end of the series, but the language the show uses makes it impossible to just leave it at that.

In Doppelgangland, when Willow meets her vampire self, she describes her as “kinda gay”. Not gay, but kinda gay. We also see Vampire!Willow making out with Vampire!Xander in The Wish beforehand, so if Vamp!Willow is supposed to tell us something about Willow’s own sexuality, then it’d stand to reason that she’s bi. Right?

Well, apparently not. But then we run into her actual line in 5x11 where she first uses a label, saying “Hello, gay now!”. Notice, it’s gay now. As in Willow just woke up one day and turned gay. The same joke(?) is repeated in Intervention, where one of the characteristics that was programmed into Buffybot about Willow was saying Gay(1999 - ).

Now, that’s not to say that Willow can’t just have a fluid sexuality and identify anyway she fucking wants to, and she doesn’t need to justify her label to anyone. She fell in love with Tara, and that made her reconsider her own identity. Season 7 almost ends up addressing this too in a scene I think, so that’ll be nice to get to.

The issue mostly comes from the show skipping to engage even with the possibility that Willow (or anyone for that matter) might be attracted to more than one gender at the same time. The closest we get to this is with the love triangle setup in New Moon Rising, except I guess in this love triangle Willow also chose a sexual orientation?

It’s like that episode was the quantum superposition of Willow’s Schrödinger’s sexuality, and upon observation, it locked into either one of its two states. That’s why Tara’s been talking about getting a cat in that episode! Guys, we solved it!

Notice also that I’ve yet to really talk about Willow’s sexual history before Tara in regards to this… because for me that’s sort of less part of the point? If Willow was a real person, and you knew that she had this adorable boyfriend before she identified as a lesbian, you wouldn’t go up to her and question how she defines her own sexuality. I mean… I hope so? Don’t be a fucking asshole.

But that’s both the fallacy of the argument and the reason why you should still respect the label Willow identifies with. Because Willow is not real, she’s a fictional character, and therefore arguments can and should be made about how the show portrays her sexuality… And yet, the people who identify with Willow are very much real, and so are their own experiences of people dismissing their own chosen identities.

So, there you go folks. These are my two cents. Willow’s gay, but we need to acknowledge how the show appears to be either completely unaware, or actively dismissive of the existence of bisexuality. This even comes up in the S8 comics, where Buffy’s sexuality after having a relationship with a woman is continuously referred to as essentially “not-gay”. Because I guess in the Buffyverse canon these are your only two options.

Now that we got all that out of the way, we can briefly talk about this episode, I guess.

To keep it on track, I guess we should dissect the argument between Willow and Tara that sort of caused me to whip this whole discussion out here.

Now, this is a fascinating scene, because it pivots a lot, and reveals a lot about the characters and their insecurities. It also appears to be fueled by Willow’s own lack of self-reflection and Tara’s non-confrontational nature.

It starts with Willow complaining to Tara about how Buffy appears to be trying to be more strict with Dawn. Willow is obviously identifying with Dawn in the situation. But Tara says she completely understands Buffy.

This then probably reminds Willow of Buffy earlier telling her that she wouldn’t understand when she was talking to her about Dawn, which causes a mood shift in Willow. It also reminded me of season 3 of Buffy telling Willow the same thing regarding her connection with Faith, so as a Buffy/Tara shipper that association kind of delights me, ngl.

But as Tara pushes further, seeing that something is bothering Willow, she reveals the insecurity behind it. Willow isn’t just responding to Tara having this wisdom through this major, tragic life experience that she can relate to Buffy with; it’s that Tara’s done all of this so much longer than she has. She’s been a witch all her life. She’s been out much longer.

That however then triggers Tara’s own insecurities about Willow rapidly surpassing her in her own magical abilities, and says that that “frightens” her. She tries walking back on her choice of word later, but it’s too late, and Willow locks into that.

Now, this is some riveting stuff. Because with foreknowledge, the easiest interpretation here is that this will relate back to Willow’s abuse of magic in season 6. That deep down Tara already sees what having this much power will do to her girlfriend.

This is arguably even reinforced in the episode with Willow going after Glory. It’s once again foreshadowing, Willow attempting to take revenge for something that’s been done to Tara; but it also betrays a certain arrogance in Willow. She actually believes that she can take on Glory, a supposed God. (Which, honestly? She probably could by season 7.) That’s the kind of power that she wields and how she chooses to use it.

Still, in the argument itself Tara pushes this fear of hers in a slightly different direction, saying that she’s afraid that she wouldn’t be able to fit into Willow’s life, after all these changes. And that’s where the previous discussion fits in.

Perhaps to understand Willow’s response, we should remember how magic has been used as our lesbian metaphor for almost a whole season. Because she almost immediately jumps to the conclusion, that Tara’s afraid that she would… go back to boys? Which is of course a classic, toxic stereotype used against bisexuals, despite the fact that no one here canonically identifies as bi, so add that to the discourse.

More importantly, it’s said by Willow. Now, Tara totally drops the ball here, asking her “Should I be?”, which reinforces the validity of Willow’s assumption that it’s actually something that Tara is thinking. Even someone as perfect and precious as Tara is not immune to propaganda.

In Tara’s defense, she once again tries dancing back on it, and talking it out before Willow storms out, but yeah. While I’d like to think that Tara’s question came more from a place of general insecurity, regardless of the gender of Willow’s next possible love interest, she sure fucked up in that moment.

Still, the fact that it’s Willow jumping to this debate, might just tell us more about Willow herself and how she sees herself.

Let’s go back to Restless for a bit. In that episode, Willow’s fear was ended up being about how she was scared that deep down she was still the same girl that she was in high school. That all these things she developed through college that made her stand out were just a facade, and that she was merely hiding her true identity as the same lonely loser she believed herself to have been back then.

So… and bear with me here… if we take that fear as a core motivation for Willow’s character, we can interpret the way she identifies her sexuality as a means to distance herself from her old identity. From this perspective, it’d perhaps even make sense for her to feel insecure about a supposed attraction to men, because she sees that as a regression to her old identity.

I can not stress it enough that this is merely a possible interpretation though. And one that would really only become satisfying if season 7 - which was already largely about reconciling with these different aspects of her identity for Willow aside the obvious theme of power - ended up tying it all together with Willow re-defining her own sexuality. It didn’t though, so I’m still left with the same conclusions, and this thought experiment of a character analysis.

Anywho, this is getting so very long, and there are still a few things that I wanted to touch upon this episode. Mainly the parallel we’re drawing between Willow / Tara and Buffy & Dawn throughout.

Normally, I love a good parallel storytelling. It’s efficient and makes the whole thing more cohesive. Here however, they manage to drive the parallel home so hard, that it just becomes weird at some point.

Like the fact that we have these two conflicts in the two relationships, arguably anchoring the episode? That’s good stuff. I also like the fact that Willow and Tara’s argument grows out of their discussion about Buffy and Dawn’s situation.

There’s actually a lot of great interaction in the entire episode. I love Dawn opening up to Spike about how she feels responsible for what would happen to Tara, and how she feels like she can’t be good because of all the terrible things happening around her. That’s a brilliant scene. Spike’s “Well, I’m not good and I’m okay”? I actually love him in that moment, not even gonna lie.

Buffy thinking that she actually convinced Willow to not go after Glory reminded me of a scene in Angel the series, where the gang thinks they managed to curve Fred’s impulses to axe murder her old professor. Do you all even know these people you call friends??? But again, I liked that exchange.

And okay, Buffy needed to be reminded what she would do if something happened to Dawn to realize what Willow was planning. Fine.

But then you’ve got the doctor asking Willow if Tara was her “sister” (to which she of course replied “She’s my everything”, and it’s fine, I’m fine), and then in the last scene, Buffy explicitly equating Willow’s need to take care of Tara with her own feelings regarding Dawn.

Again, I understand parallel storytelling. I love it. But when you’re equating a romantic and a familial relationship there’s a point where it becomes weird, and for me, these two moments put it just over that edge. This is of course a deeply subjective perspective, and I recognize that.

And then you also get Buffy trying to take on these new adult responsibilities in the episode. She’s dropping out of college to try and care for Dawn, and is faced with the challenge to become a parental authority figure in her sister’s life. The scene where she explains to Dawn that the reason she’s being tough with her, is because otherwise she could be seen unfit to be her guardian just gutted me.

This episode is just way too much, guys. And we’re only just at the beginning of the big finish of this season.

[counterpunches]

There was always something that felt off to me about Willow and Tara’s fight in Tough Love, and it finally clicked into place.

To recap: the fight starts off with W+T expressing different opinions on Buffy’s treatment of Dawn in the wake of Joyce’s passing. Tara worries she’s coming off as too authoritative about the subject, to which Willow admits she feels like the junior partner in lots of ways, because of her lack of experience (not having lost her mom, being out, practicing witchcraft) compared to Tara. From there, Tara admits she’s frightened by how powerful Willow’s getting, and it escalates to Willow accusing Tara of thinking she’s going to change her mind about being gay and leave Tara.

My interpretation had always been that Tara rightfully voiced her concern about Willow’s magic use, and Willow deflects the accusation, manipulating it into an argument about sexuality so she wouldn’t have to confront her growing dangerous relationship to magic. I was having a hard time not seeing it through that lens, knowing what we know later about Willow’s abuse of magic in Season 6.

But what I just realized is that neither of them are wrong, really. Buuuuut they’re not entirely right, either.

As manipulative as Willow can be (and boy, can she be manipulative), I don’t think she was twisting the conversation to avoid talking about the magic. Why? Because honestly, at that point in S5, if memory serves correctly, Willow hasn’t actually been doing anything wrong with magic yet. But what she has been doing, is using magic differently than she had in Season 4 (and early S5). This is what Tara’s sensitive to.

In S4, magic was used to bring Willow and Tara together. Its how they discover the other is a witch, and magic is used then on as a metaphor for their burgeoning relationship. The more spells they do together, the closer they become. The more powerful spells they do together (floating the rose, Nether Realms, etc;), the more they fall in love.

At that point in Season 5, Willow hasn’t really given Tara much reason to fear she’s been using magic improperly. Yes, she’s been getting more powerful, tinkering with the tinkerbell light, teleporting Glory, but none of that was dark magic or inappropriately used magic (like, say, thoughtlessly conjuring party decorations, sucking books dry and going after gods and raising the dead, for example). It was just a little more advanced, took a little more power, and….didn’t include Tara. And that’s the tension of the fight.

From the very first day they meet in Hush, the way magic is portrayed for Willow and Tara is being more powerful together than apart. So when ‘powerful’ starts to become divorced from the ‘together’ part, their relationship comes into question.

Not in actuality of course, the magic isn’t why they love each other. They’re madly, stupid, grossly in love with each other for reasons that have nothing to do with the magic. And maybe they aren’t fully conscious of this and therefore unable to communicate their concerns, but both Willow and Tara have the exact same insecurity and never talk about it. And that’s what I didn’t fully realize, that Tara has the exact same insecurity about magic and their relationship as Willow. I don’t think the fight in Tough Love is Tara being worried Willow will ‘turn straight again’. Tara’s worrying how she’s going to fit in Willow’s life when Willow doesn’t need Tara for the magic anymore. The magic that brought them together. The magic that was so integral to their relationship.

Tara always said she wanted to feel useful to the gang. To Willow. If Tara doesn’t have any more magic to teach Willow (“I taught you teeny tinkerbell light.”), where would that leave her? Both Tara and Willow are blinded by their own self-doubts about their relationship and magic, and it only ends up driving them apart. Ironically, it’s the same thing that Willow admits was part of her problem in S6 (“Don’t I?” [need magic to be special] “Who was I? Just some girl. Tara didn’t even know that girl…If you could be plain old Willow or Super Willow, who would you want to be?).

Both Tara and Willow are worried about how the other will continue to love them without the magic. It’s what Tara was fearful of in S5, as Willow grew more independent with the magic, and it’s one of the biggest reasons Willow was afraid to give it up in S6.

Anyway, for having watched every moment of screentime they share a thousand times over, you’d think I’d’ve figured this out sooner, but ding dong, I’m dumb. (And blinded by how much foreshadowing of Dark Magic Willow there is throughout the entire series.)

[ifeveristoday]

Buffy Summers’s Diary (IX)

At some point I’ll probably ditch the roman numerals, but that day is not today.

 Dawn has the pointiest elbows in our family, along with icy feet. I know this because she insists on resting them against my ankles, which makes me regret not taking the couch. I nudge her.

‘Was it really because of Dad that you’re here?’

Dawn grunted. ‘Yes. Let me sleep.’

‘Why not Mom?’

‘She went on a retreat with Brian.’ Dawn rolled over.

‘She did? I didn’t know that.’

‘She probably called you. And since you don’t answer your phone…’ Dawn sighed. ‘Is me being here a problem for you, Buffy?’

‘No, of course not. You’re welcome to stay as long as you need to.’

‘I can pay half of the rent.’

‘Well I was going to bring it up in the morning, but yeah, okay.’

‘Wow, not even a family discount?’ Dawn turned over and gave me a sleepy lidded glare.

‘Please. You’ll eat me out of house and home.’ I poked her side. ‘Where do all the carbs go?’

She sniffed. ‘My hair.’

‘You do lose a lot of brushes in it.’

‘Oh shut up. I told you I don’t know where your boar bristle artisan whatever went.’

‘That brush cost me three hundred dollars.’

‘Well you should have tagged it with GPS, then.’

‘Don’t take my stuff in the first place, brat.’

‘Says the woman who put holes in my favorite pair of jeans. In the wrong places, by the way.’

‘They were already distressed denim, Dawn.’

‘You shouldn’t have gotten in that bar fight.’

I frowned. ‘I wouldn’t have gotten into that fight if you hadn’t gone into the bar.’

‘You’re worse than Mom, you know that?’

Dawn elbowed me.

‘Hey!’

‘Now can I go to sleep?’

‘Fine. And I’m not as bad as Mom.’

‘Sure you aren’t. And you can tell me why you were Meredithing in the morning, k?’

Morning brought the scent of charred coffee grounds in the air. I woke up and walked into the kitchen, where I surprised Dawn frantically dumping the contents of my coffee pot into the sink.

‘Well, at least you got it before the alarm went off?’ I yawned.

‘I took the batteries out before I started,’ Dawn admitted.

‘I don’t know if I should applaud you or ban you from the kitchen altogether.’

‘It’s a lot different from Dad’s machine.’ Dawn crossed her arms.

‘Yes. You just have to boil water and pour it over the grounds.’ I rinsed out the pot and ran the disposal. ‘I’ve got cereal and I can make you some eggs before I leave for the office.’

Dawn perked up. ‘Can I get an omelet?’

‘Sure. Anything else?’

‘I’ll make toast. You have chunky peanut butter, right?’

‘As if there was any other kind. In the corner of the bottom cabinet.’

 While I was heating up the pan, Dawn said casually, ‘So what was up with last night?’

‘Hmm?’

‘You know. You had Meredith Grey face. All mopey.’

‘I wasn’t moping. I had ice cream brain.’

‘Yeah but you only eat ice cream when you’re sad.’

‘I wasn’t sad…just disappointed. The Summers’s curse struck again.’

Dawn scoffed. ‘There isn’t a curse, you just have crappy taste in men.’

‘Excuse me, I-dated-an-Instagram-influencer.’

‘Okay, so RJ was a mistake. That’s fair. But I just have one strike against me, you’re like a whole season of the Bachelorette.’

‘Uh, not a whole season.’

‘A cable season, then.’ Dawn came up and stole a handful of shredded cheese. ‘You’re not cursed.’

‘I don’t want to talk about it. It’s pointless. What are your plans for the day?’

‘I’m helping Tara at her studio.’

‘Weren’t you interning somewhere? Some political campaign?’

‘That was last year, Buffy. And my candidate lost. That’s why we have Governor Snyder now.’

Dawn spread peanut butter on her toast, her expression pensive. ‘So I thought I’d take a break from politics. Tara offered me a job and I like it so far.’

‘How is she?’

Dawn smiled. ‘She’s doing really well. Professionally and personally – I think she’s dating again, but I’m not a hundred percent sure. She’s keeping it on the down low.’

‘Oh, good for her. Tell her I said hi.’

‘You can tell her yourself. Unless Willow got you in the divorce.’

‘Dawn.’

‘I think it’s dumb,’ Dawn mumbled through a mouthful of toast. She swallowed. ‘Tara’s our friend too. And just because you grew up with Willow doesn’t mean you should take her side automatically.’

 ‘I’m not taking anyone’s side.’

‘Prove it. Tara and I are having dinner tonight. Come.’

‘Fine, I will. Where is it?’

‘At Tara’s. I’ll text you her address.’

‘What time?’

‘Seven. You don’t have to bring anything, just yourself.’

‘Okay, I’ll see you there. And Dawn? I am glad that you’re here.’

Dawn nodded. ‘I know.’

I deleted all of my voicemails. I know I’m a coward. But I just couldn’t – well not face them, but I just didn’t want to know.

 I saw Anya on my way into work. She had a Bluetooth earpiece in and was arguing loudly into the air. ‘I don’t care what you think the market value is, Ferdinand. I want to know what the actual price is. And no, there will be no commission fee.’

She nodded at me as I reached the elevators.

‘Morning,’ she mouthed at me.

‘Morning, Anya.’

The elevator dinged and the doors slid open. I walked inside and breathed out.

‘Rough morning, love?’

‘Oh my god, William!’ I whirled around. He raised one scarred eyebrow in amusement. ‘Don’t do that!’

He peeled himself away from the wall and walked over to me. ‘Do what?’

‘Lurk. Make a noise or something.’

‘I did ask you about your morning.’ He leaned in. ‘You’re awfully jumpy.’

‘I am not jumpy. And you were hiding in the corner. Like some kind of –hiding creature.’

‘You are very hard to get a hold of, Buffy Summers. I thought you’d joined the witness protection program.’

He held up a finger. ‘You haven’t been in the office and you don’t answer your phone.’

His smile turned up at the corner. ‘So tell me. Who’d you kill?’

I matched his stare and then turned around. ‘If I told you, I’d have to kill you.’

His laughter rang out behind me. ‘Ah, I’ve missed this.’

   Cordelia’s cubicle was blessedly empty when I walked in. I looked around and saw no sign of Harmony or any of their clique. Feeling lighter, I made my way to my cubicle.

 It was covered in flowers – namely, sunflowers. They decked my walls and spilled over my desk. William stopped dead behind me. ‘Well, well. Do you have a secret admirer?’

I looked at him. ‘I don’t think so.’

He shook his head. ‘It wasn’t me.’

There was a hint of something in his gaze, then he looked away. ‘Well, I’ll leave you to it. I’ve got a deadline to meet.’

 I turned my attention back to the impromptu garden. There was a card, tucked behind my lamp.

I reached for it and opened it.

Even before I saw the cursive A – I knew.

There were only two words written on the card.

I’m sorry.

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[ramajmedia]

Buffy The Vampire Slayer: 10 Hidden Details About The Main Characters Everyone Missed

Buffy the Vampire Slayer may have gone off the air over 15 years ago, but the show maintains a devoted fan following. And those fans have spent years poring over every nuance of the show. At this point fans know the characters inside and out, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t a few things they missed.

RELATED: RANKED: EVERY VERSION OF VAMPIRES ON TV/MOVIES

Here, we’re covering details about the main characters from Buffy that fans might not have picked up on. From foreshadowing future character developments, to referencing the past, to hinting at secret relationships, Buffy is full of subtle elements that are easy to overlook. Here are 10 of them.

10 WILLOW AND HER DOPPELGÄNGER HAVE A LOT IN COMMON

Willow’s vampire doppelgänger made her debut in Season 3, but it wasn’t until a few episodes later that the human Willow met her blood-sucking counterpart. Willow didn’t believe the pair had anything in common at the time, observing of her doppelgänger, “I'm so evil… and I think I’m kind of gay.”

It turns out that by the end of Buffy’s sixth season Willow would be both of those things. In Season 4 after breaking up with Oz, Willow finds herself attracted to Tara and realizes she’s a lesbian. Then, in Season 6, after Tara’s unexpected demise, Willow, who had been teetering on the edge all season, went completely dark. She became evil in ways her vampy doppelgänger probably never could have imagined. Willow even used her vampire look-alike’s signature catch phrase “Bored now,”before magically massacring the man who killed Tara. So much for nothing in common.

9 DAWN’S DEBUT IS FORESHADOWED

Fans were left scratching their heads when Buffy’s sister Dawn was introduced in Season 5, especially since the characters acted as if she had always been around. But it turns out Dawn’s arrival was foreshadowed more than once.

RELATED: BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER: 10 BIGGEST TWISTS, RANKED

In the two-part Season 3 finale, Faith tells Buffy she’s “all dressed up in big sister’s clothes.” Later, when Faith and Buffy share a dream, Faith talks about Little Miss Muffet,  a reference to Dawn. In another dream in Season 4, Faith and Buffy discuss how much Buffy has to do with “little sis coming.” Then, in the Season 4 finale, Tara instructs Buffy to “be back before dawn.” Finally, as the episode ends, Buffy peers into the empty room that would become Dawn’s in the very next episode.

8 BUFFY’S SARCASTIC PREDICTION

In one of the show’s most heartbreaking story arcs, Buffy lost her mother Joyce in Season 5 after a battle with a brain tumor. Just as Joyce seemed to be on the mend, she suffered a brain aneurysm and perished unexpectedly. What fans may not have noticed is that Buffy predicted her mother’s passing in an offhand comment the season before.

In the fourth season premiere while buying textbooks, Buffy makes a joke about their outlandish price tag by commenting, “I can’t wait ‘til my mom gets the bill for these books. I hope it’s a funny aneurysm.” Ouch. Buffy creator and executive producer Joss Whedon had planned Joyce’s demise well in advance and incorporated that throwaway line to foreshadow things to come.

7 TARA KNOWS WHAT GILES WILL DO

When big bad Glory was searching for her magical key in the fifth season, she came to the conclusion that it had to be Tara because she was the newest member of the Scooby Gang. However, when she realized Tara was just a plain old human, Glory brain-sucks her, turning Tara into one of her minions.

RELATED: 5 THINGS BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER DOES BETTER THAN THE VAMPIRE DIARIES (& VICE VERSA)

While Tara loses her faculties in most ways, she somehow becomes plugged into Glory’s wavelength, easily leading the gang to Glory’s tower in Season 5' finale “The Gift.” Yet, her abilities seem to go beyond that. As the group is exiting The Magic Box, Tara has a moment of clarity as she walks past Giles. She turns to him and accuses him of being a murderer. The gang is surprised and confused. But the accusation turns out to be prophetic. Before the fight with Glory is over, Giles takes out Ben, Glory’s host body.

6 XANDER WORKED AS AN EXOTIC DANCER

During the summer after high school, Xander took off on a road trip to see the United States. He was gone all summer and never contacted the rest of the gang, so they assumed he was traveling the whole time. However, in Season 4's premiere, Buffy learned the truth: Xander never made it past the southern California city of Oxnard because that's where the engine fell out of his car.

In order to pay for the repairs, Xander spent a month and a half working at the Ladies Night club washing dishes. That is until one night when one of the male strippers called in sick…While Xander refused to say more, the implication was clear: the (strip) show had to go on, so Xander filled in.

5 WILLOW MUSICALLY REFERENCES SEASON 1

Fans agree that the iconic Season 6 episode “Once More, With Feeling” was one of the high points of the series. Willow didn’t get a ton of singing time during the episode but she had a noteworthy line in the early number “I’ve Got a Theory." In the song, all the characters propose ideas about who could be responsible for the musical plague they're experiencing. Willow’s theory was “Some kid is dreaming, and we’re all trapped inside his wacky Broadway nightmare.”

RELATED: BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER: 10 SCARIEST MONSTERS, RANKED

Willow didn't pull her theory out of thin air; that exact scenario happened to her before in the Season 1 episode “Nightmares,” in which a child turns people’s worst nightmares into reality. Willow’s nightmare: that she had to sing onstage.

4 BUFFY’S FATHER REMAINS A PART OF HER LIFE

Buffy’s father Hank is barely seen in the series. After her parents’ divorce, Hank had minimal contact with his daughter. If anything, most fans thought of Giles as Buffy's father figure. Yet Hank wasn't completely gone from Buffy’s life.

In the show’s first three seasons, Buffy saw her father several times. He periodically came to Sunnydale to see her on weekends and she visited him in Los Angeles over the summer. Then in Season 6, after Buffy’s mother passed away, Buffy unsuccessfully tried to reach her father. It seemed like maybe Hank was gone for good. Yet in the comic book continuation of the series, Hank makes an appearance to visit with both Buffy and Dawn.

3 SPIKE KNEW HALFREK WHEN…

The episode “Fool for Love” details Spike’s backstory, including his pre-vampire days when he was simply a bad poet named William who was in love with a woman named Cecily, who cruelly rejected him. However, the episode wasn’t the last we saw of Cecily — or at least the actress who played her.

RELATED: BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER: 10 STORYLINES THAT HAVE AGED POORLY

Kali Rocha returned to in Season 6 to portray Anya’s vengeance demon bestie Halfrek. And when Halfrek and Spike happened to run across one another in the episode, there's a telling moment where they recognize each other. Halfrek even refers to Spike as “William." Many fans took the moment as confirmation that Halfrek and Cecily were the same person — a theory that was later confirmed by Whedon.

2 BUFFY EXPIRES AT THE SAME TIME AS HER CREDIT CARD

It's no secret that Buffy enjoyed some retail therapy every now and then. But one subtle detail has her expiring at the same time as her mother's credit card. When Faith swapped bodies with Buffy in Season 4, Faith used Joyce's credit card to book a flight out of Sunnydale.

On the phone, the expiration date she gave for the card was 5-0-1. In other words, May 2001, a date that happened to coincide with Buffy’s Season 5 finale a year and a half later when Buffy sacrificed herself to save Dawn.

1 SPIKE AND ANGEL SHARE A NAME

Fans know that Spike and Angel went by different names when they were human. Spike’s given name was William, a popular moniker in England where Spike was born. Meanwhile, Angel’s given name was Liam, the Irish form of William.

The names share the same origin and meaning, with Liam arising out of the name William. That means for all intents and purposes, Spike and Angel’s given names are the same.

NEXT: BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER: 10 MOST BADASS FEMALE CHARACTERS, RANKED

source https://screenrant.com/1797135-2/

[womanaction]

btvs/ats/community (hope i'm not doing too much lol) for the fandom meme

are you kidding me anon i live for this!!! thank you!

buffy

the character i least understand: like...anya probably? from a storytelling standpoint i don’t think the writers really agreed on what to do with her and from a relating standpoint she’s 1000+ years old and a former-then-again demon. they just didn’t really go into her character enough for me to say i understand her, and i think it’s easy to write her on a shallow level.

interactions i enjoyed the most: the easy thing to say is probably my ships right, and it is true that spike/buffy is my otp maybe mostly because i’m endlessly fascinated by their dynamics, but i also really love the og scoobies hanging out and especially the willow/xander friendship. beyond that i also loved tara&dawn and spike&dawn. and buffy&cordy, which i do ship but i brotp it more than otp most days. either way is good though.

the character who scares me the most: willow bc of below answer

the character who is mostly like me: willow. definitely willow. i’ve thought about making a photoset w characters i id w the most and she’d be dead center. i sometimes can’t even enjoy her character, especially at cringey moments, because of that, and i recognize that her worst qualities are some of mine too. i don’t think i’d try to destroy the world but thankfully i shouldn’t ever have the opportunity.

hottest looks character: faith? i totally change my answer every time bc i’m a cheating bisexual (this is the one scenario where that stereotype is correct)

one thing i dislike about my fave character: i’m going to use buffy as my fave here bc i’ll talk about cordy below. (i like to think about myself as having 3 types of faves in each fandom: the fave to watch, the one i id with, and the one i’d die for. buffy’s the latter.) writing-wise i dislike how we lose a lot of access to buffy’s inner mind. person-wise i guess her black-and-white thinking? it’s pretty necessary to her work and it’s obviously not as bad as like...riley’s but i think it’s detrimental to her in that she doesn’t seek out the help she needs. she wants to be all-slayer or all-buffy, she wants things to be all bad or all good.

one thing i like about my hated character: i guess my hated character is riley bc using a villain seems cheatish (i thought saying warren, and he makes star wars references). i actually have a lot in common with riley, which i’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing, but i really like how he tried to be involved with buffy’s family? like obviously later in s5 that turned into him acting weird and entitled about it but at the beginning when he’s trying to befriend dawn and such is sweet and good. 

a quote or scene that haunts me: ummm all of them tbh. but to pick a random one i think a lot about the scene of buffy just staring at the water coming out of the faucet. also another water-related one, when i watch the body i’m always struck by the weird water purifier/cooler thing you see in their kitchen bc we had that exact same one in the house i lived in before my father passed away. getting personal i guess but the first time i watched it that floored me.

a death that left me indifferent: all of them affected me a lot i feel but jonathan’s definitely had less impact than i feel like it should given he’d been on the show for like 5 seasons by that point. and i like him as a character! i guess it got really subsumed into andrew’s character arc which kinda sucked, and it was played up more as a villain moment.

a character i wish died but didn’t: none of them i love my kids

my ship that never sailed: faith/buffy!!!! why...

angel

the character i least understand: maybe lorne? again like with the anya thing this is a character with a potentially fascinating backstory and a very unique perspective and we get just a little taste of it. love him though

interactions i enjoyed the most: i really loved the whole gang’s interactions tbh but wesley&gunn’s friendship deserves a special shout out. also doyle and angel did so much with that bond in so few episodes. and i also really liked lindsay’s interactions with angel for some reason, idk. maybe because he brings out angel’s petty side.

the character who scares me the most: probably angel, right? not angelus but when angel himself teeters into Badness territory. i’m both scared of him and scared for him.

the character who is mostly like me: either fred or angel. i get compared to fred a lot irl and online from people who’ve seen it mostly bc i have the same vague face concept as amy acker and also a southern accent, and i am in stem and whatever but i never felt like there was a lot there for me to latch onto. imo fred was a major missed opportunity too, they didn’t flesh her out nearly as much as they could have. anyway they’re both kinda awkward and introverted and same.

hottest looks character: uhhh it’s cheating to say faith here again i guess but i’m doing it anyway.

one thing i dislike about my fave character: so i love cordy to death (obviously) i loved her almost immediately on buffy and only managed to love her even more but obviously she is very self-centered and could be a better friend sometimes...i guess...and i’m not gonna mention the travesty of her writing in s4.

one thing i like about my hated character: i guess that’s gonna be wesley? who i don’t hate at all i just felt like everything started getting drawn into the Orbit of his Manpain in the later seasons BUT i love dorky!wes to death. like “rogue demon hunter” wes. that’s the wes for me.

a quote or scene that haunts me: like not to be obvious but the “nothing we do matters, all that matters is what we do” MURDERS me every time like i honestly find so much meaning in that. but i also think about cordy accepting the demon at the end of “birthday” and almost cry every time she’s just so brave and strong and willing to be better and i’m upset.

a death that left me indifferent: wes again? i’m sorry y’all are gonna murder me. it’s not that it left me indifferent but after cordy and fred died...and not long after lilah either and lorne is over here shooting lindsay...i didn’t have many emotions left sorry 

a character i wish died but didn’t: uhmmm none of them honestly except if s4 was a character

my ship that never sailed: WELL honestly angel and cordy never got to be together at all...but they did admit they loved each other...but my only other real ship here was wesley/lilah so idk, they were both tragic and barely happened so take ur pick, joss whedon hates my happiness :/ oh wait snap! i was actually a little invested in angel and kate before that arc got thrown out the window. so them i guess.

community

the character i least understand: excluding like...todd...of the main cast probably shirley. not that i don’t understand her exactly but it’s yet another case of writers not really knowing what to do with a character and her writing sometimes being very uneven. obviously it’s a comedy so i’m not expecting in depth explorations of every detail but i did feel like there were lots of blanks about her past/motivations/etc that just got ignored. still love her though.

interactions i enjoyed the most: well obviously i love annie/abed platonically or romantically...and i also ship britta/jeff so them too. there wasn’t nearly enough britta/annie which i also ship both ways. i also loved the weird dynamic with annie being pierce’s favorite...and shirley&jeff!! underutilized but always good. 

the character who scares me the most: hmm i was really worried about jeff for a while there.

the character who is mostly like me: annie tbh her perfectionism and drive and anxieties are just.....right there in my brain....always.  

hottest looks character: annie, alison brie is a flawless goddess of sexiness and humor. that said thanks to aforementioned identification i can’t crush on annie per se? but divorced from personality she wins for sure.

one thing i dislike about my fave character: so my favorite to watch is britta and i had a really hard time with some of her cringier psych-major material bc i’ve known so many irritating psych majors like that. mmmmmmmmnnnnnnnuuuugh. hard to sit through. good stuff but cringey

one thing i like about my hated character: i really don’t hate any of the characters? i guess picking pierce out of the mains i liked his moments of kindness and especially whenever he tried to bond w jeff. good stuff 

a quote or scene that haunts me: the whole ending of “virtual systems analysis” honestly...some Strong Identification w both annie and abed happening there.

a death that left me indifferent: i mean i guess if hickey really died in s6 as implied in that one screenshotted email or whatever that, since they didn’t go into it, but otherwise i guess when star burns [fake] died

a character i wish died but didn’t: uhhhhh none i love my kids

my ship that never sailed: annie/abed, i can’t shut up about it (that said i’m glad it didn’t sail tbh bc i don’t think i would have liked what the writers would have done with it probably but still)

[evodevo-geekmonkey]

I don't want to start anything and it is cool if you disagree but telling straight fans not to like and relate to traits in gay/bi characters seriously freaks me out as a gay woman. Like, I get saying "don't make the gay character fit into a straight box" or "obviously you still don't know what it is like to be gay" but if for example they ID with Willow because she is a nerd or because she makes mistakes or with Cosima because she is an open minded scientist or Delphine because she is struggling with people trusting her or Callie who is getting divorced, that is a GOOD THING. We are SUPPOSED to empathize with other people. What we are not supposed to do and what is literally killing us, is to not empathize with people or to be unable to relate to people because they are gay. Straight people relating to gay characters and liking gay characters is a good thing as long as they are cool and respectful about the character being gay and it freaks me out when people discourage this. Because we live in a world with straight people. My mom, my dad, my brother, my friends, likely my future children. I want to be part of the whole world not a small part of it. I want acceptance not a tiny box to be safe in. Plus I do this irl allllll the time. I can talk to my straight friends about relationships and family and struggles and we relate to each other. We live in a world with people with different sexualies and we will never be free or safe until we can be around those people and have those people see us as human enough to empathize with. Seeing ourselves in other people, seeing how they feel love and pain and joy as we do, is normal and good and builds the backbone of peace and kindness. I could go way further into that but... This is a good thing. I love finding other people of any sexuality who love Cosima or Santana or Willow or Tara. It is a good thing.

[theclacks]

Buffy (Season 5) & Angel (Season 2) Thoughts

So, I was watching these at a pretty slow pace... and then Fool For Love happened. And I went from watching approx 1 episodes a day to 5 episodes a day.

As always thoughts below the cut. (Previous thoughts: Buffy 1 & 2, Buffy 3, Buffy 4 & Angel 1). 

Buffy - Season 5

On how it compares with past seasons...

So, season 2 is STILL my all time favorite. I did like season 5 over both season 3 AND season 4 though, which is probably because of totally because of Spike. But at the same time, I don’t think it can be disconnected from season 4. Like season 5 is really the second half of season 4. Xander finding his place in society is directly linked to his issues of being a basement bum in season 4. Giles becoming the Magic Box’s owner is directly linked to his issues with being unemployed in season 4. Riley’s issues with being Riley is... well, because he’s Riley but yeah.

On Riley...

Going to get him out of the way, so I can talk about other things. I like that their relationship fell apart naturally over the course of several episodes. And I think it was a good tie that Spike was the one who “caused” it because, like The Yoko Factor last season, it was him “causing” rifts that were really already there. (And in this case didn’t even “cause” it so much as play delivery boy.)

I’ve been reading some fanfic in between eps, and so much of it (in fics where Riley’s involved) includes lines to the general tune of “Buffy never REALLY liked Riley” or “Riley rarely ever gave Buffy orgasms” and I think that’s unfair because Riley was a nice guy. And I appreciate the writers tried her out in a relationship like that because sometimes relationships aren’t this grand life-or-death emotional cocktail. Sometimes one party’s just a little bit more in love with one side than the other. Sometimes they have miscommunication issues. Sometimes that’s enough. And sometimes it isn’t.

On Dawn...

I liked her. I thought she was going to be annoying, but I liked her. Maybe it’s the younger sister in me. I loved her buddy-buddy relationship with Spike. I liked her whole backstory and status as the key, which I had no idea/prior knowledge about going it. In fact, before I started watching, I knew Buffy eventually got a sister, but I assumed it was some divorce thing and Joyce eventually got full custody or something. Then as I started watching the show, I knew that couldn’t be the case, and for the first four seasons I was theorizing between long lost sibling, Joyce suddenly has a baby and the baby gets stuck in a time loop or demon dimension until it reaches middle school age, etc, so it was kind of cool having all of that play out.

On Anya and Giles...

I just want to give a little shout out to them because other than Dawn & Spike, theirs was my favorite unexpected relationship. I like how their development both paired and contrasted Buffy & Giles, how the writers balanced the fatherly aspect of Giles with the more short-tempered, professional boss aspect.

On Ben/Glory...

I think they could’ve done a bit more with the Ben side of Ben and Glory. I liked the development he got at the end and how he ultimately picked Glory’s side without fully picking it, and I loved how Giles tossed aside the “hero” mantra and ended him, but yeah. I just feel like there could’ve been a bit “more” even when I don’t know what that “more” is.

As for Glory, I love her. And even though I get from Glory’s end why her appearances were scattered throughout the year (being literally scatterbrained and all) but it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense why Buffy waited until after Dawn had been kidnapped to try and take her out. Like, yes, Buffy was scared and had to be backed into a corner (and Willow-pep-talked out of it), but their main attack plan revolved around having the God-forged hammer and the golden orb thing. THEY HAD THE GOLDEN ORB THING THE ENTIRE TIME. THEY KNEW IT HAD GLORY-REPELLING POWERS. WHY WERE THEY LETTING THE ORB CHILL IN THE BASEMENT THIS WHOLE TIME? I mean, and considering the fact the orb only stopped her for a couple seconds, narratively, they could’ve used it earlier. I kind of wish there’d been a mid-season episode where they tried to launch a full attack with the orb and what not, and failed and almost got Dawn discovered/killed, and THEN they could’ve been like “welp, we tried a full attack and exhausted our god-repelling items, okay, NOW let’s go into avoidance mode.” IDK, this is me. Backseat writing. Because I think that was the one main issue for me this season that could’ve taken the overarching plot from good to great.

On Joyce...

The Body was an amazing episode. I didn’t even realize until I was reading AV Club’s recap/review of it that there was no background music during the whole thing. And I was still riveted. I think one of my favorite bits of the entire season, perhaps the entire series, is when Willow is freaking out over her blue sweater and Anya - who’s missed the majority of the freak out - ends up sitting on it and stuffing it back into the closest drawer. It was such an understated moment, and while watching I wanted Tara or Xander to notice, or for Willow to check her drawers one last time, but then she would have her sweater and things would be okay... except they wouldn’t be because Joyce is still dead and something as small as a sweater doesn’t matter at all in the long run.

And Joyce is another reason why I’m glad that Dawn became a thing this season because it gave her more screen time. Lack of Joyce-screen time was probably one of my least favorite things about season four. I mean, it made sense because of college and independence and all of that, but I don’t care. I love Joyce. I like having her on my screen. And I will miss her.

On Spike...

HELLO NEW FAVORITE EPISODE IN THE FORM OF FOOL FOR LOVE. But before I get into that, let’s have a moment of silence for the glorious friendship that was Spike/Joyce. From shared relationship-talk over marshmallows and chocolate to geekish fangirling over the soap opera passions, they were and forever will be, my Buffy BroTP. I’m so happy that the writers gave him a small scene where he showed up with flowers for Joyce because I would’ve needed closure. (*shakes a fist angrily at Steven Moffat for writing off Amy and Rory without a filmed canon scene of saying goodbye to Rory’s dad*)

But yeah. Fool For Love aka MY DEMAND FOR A SPIKE FLASHBACK EPISODE IN SEASON THREE WAS RETROACTIVELY MET. And it was awesome. Spike as a repressed poet was amazing, and what makes it even better is that I was reading a fanfic last month and got spoiled for that detail, but the fanfic was just off enough with its dialogue and characterization and the idea of Spike as a bloody awful poet was so ridiculous that I tossed the detail aside as fluffy, silly head canon. Also did I miss/misinterpret some dialogue in season 2? Because I could’ve sworn in season 2 that Dru and Spike were vamp-siblings with Angel being their mutual sire. But I’m totally fine with it being this way too.

Anyway, I could go on and on about the Buffy/Spike relationship in this season, but I won’t because I want to wrap this up and start season 6, so I’ll just say:

- favorite bit of James Marsters acting, beyond the end of Fool For Love with him in the alley with Buffy’s cash and beyond the end of Gift with him outright sobbing, would be his bit at the end of Crush where he realizes Buffy has dis-invited him from her house; I think I rewatched that bit 3+ times because the betrayal and hurt in his eyes is just so good

- also re: the end of Crush, I love how his hurt stems not just from Buffy shutting him out, but him getting shut out from the whole Summers family because at that point he’s friends with Joyce, he’s friends with Dawn, he wants to be a part of their family... which I think really ties into the flashback bits of Fool For Love too; the night in Shanghai was the best night of his life, not just because he killed a slayer, but because he had his whole family to revel in the chaos with; saying it right here, right now, screwing being on Team Angel or Team Spike, I am firmly in TEAM GIVE SPIKE A FAMILY

- I love how in the entire season, there was only one Buffy/Spike kiss and it was a chaste one at that; I love how Spike’s development was one from conditional love (say you love me and I’ll spike Dru, say you love me or I’ll get a buffybot who HAS to love me) to unconditional love (I know you don’t love me and you won’t ever love me, but that’s okay). I think it was important that Spike not get “rewarded” for slowly changing sides

- also the buffybot, I thought it was going to be a terrible, awkward episode but it ended up being one of my favorites in the season; i mean, it was still awkward in spots (as buffy said, “gross and obscene”) but the buffybot was just too plain funny for the awkwardness to stick long; the bits where the buffybot asks Anya about her money and starts listing off insults about Angel had me bursting out in laughter; especially the Angel insults because I could just imagine with Spike and a pad of paper in his crypt, scrawling them down like, “YEAH. AND HIS HAIR. GRANDSIRE HAS STUPID, SPIKY HAIR”

- so... with Buffy (temporarily) gone, is Spike just going to hang around Sunnydale? he’s the main vamp killer, so is he going to be the vampire slayer in order to help protect Dawn (aka Buffy’s legacy)? will he and Dawn hang out because they’re still bros and they both miss Buffy and don’t have any other family? I JUST WANT SPIKE AND DAWN TO BE BROS LIKE SPIKE AND JOYCE WERE BROS. THEY CAN GO WATCH EPISODES OF PASSION TOGETHER AND LAUGH AND CRY AND BOND. THIS IS ALL I WANT FROM SEASON 6, JOSS. IT’S ALL I WANT.

On miscellaneousness...

- Anya is officially my favorite character on Buffy after Spike. When I whole bunch of rubble fell on her at the end of the Gift I temporarily stopped breathing because I was just like “NOT ANYA. SHE CANNOT DIE. NO, NOT ANYA. NO.”

- Joel Grey as a demon, yay emcee from Cabaret

- before I started watching Buffy, I, like the buffybot, also thought Giles’ name was pronounced with a hard-G

- so... with Giles still alive, I’m starting to get pleasantly confused. At the beginning of season three, I posted this list of stuff I got pre-spoilered for before I started watching the show. But now I’m starting to wonder if Giles actually dies. Because I thought I remembered something about him dying in season five, or like stuff about a dying scene... except now I’m thinking that the “dying scene” was actually talking about a “dying” scene. Like dying but not ACTUALLY dead. Because I think it was the one that happens at the end of the season with him impaled... which would mean Giles doesn’t die. I think I might’ve gotten a schroedinger spoiler

Angel - Season 2

On the Darla arc...

I thought I would hate this arc, and I half-did. I hated the whole start of it with Darla in his dreams and Angel distancing himself from his crew via restlessness/extensive sleeping. I loved everything after they ended up meeting in real life, from her coming to grips with her humanity to becoming a vampire again with a bit confusion, to her slipping fully back down the darkside. It helped that Dru was there. I was starting to think that Dru would only ever appear in flashbacks again. I love Dru

On the post-Darla arc...

I really kind of hated this arc. I get what the show was trying to do, showing Wesley, Gunn, and Cordelia coming into their own WITHOUT Angel (among other things), but the Angel episodes with just Angel were so borrrrrrrring. (With the exception of the Angel/Lorne episode. That was awesome. Lorne in general is awesome. He’s my favorite Angel character after Cordelia.) They’d show W/G/C fighting a fire-breathing monster or solving a murder mystery clue style for 5 minutes and it was awful because I’m like “no, stop cutting back to Angel, THAT’S the show I want to be watching right now.” And because of the short screen time, I felt there was less W/G/C teamship than there was Wesley and Gunn becoming closer bros with Cordelia getting shafted. Cordelia, I felt, got shafted a lot in this season with the except of the finale, which speaking of...

On the Pylea finale...

OH MY GOD I LOVED THESE EPISODES SO MUCH. Like they were definitely silly in spots but I LOVE silly and the whole off-world aspect reminded me of Stargate in all the best ways. I want to print these episodes off somewhere and frame them. (NUMFAR! DO THE DANCE OF JOY!). And Cordelia got so much focus that I actually got pretty dang worried towards the end that these would be her send off episodes, that she’d choose to or be forced to stay behind and be princess of a demon dimension. (Which would’ve been an awesome send off, ngl.) If Angel ends up moving in a direction more like that, I’m going to be super stoked because while a lot of this season was objectively “good”, it didn’t pull me into watching it like Buffy season 5 did.

Also the finale made me realize, just how much I want to see more of happy!Angel. His whole bits with the sunlight and the mirrors were puppy-endearing, comedy gold (”There’s some branches over in that patch of sun. I’ll get ‘em!”). :D 

On Lorne...

Lorne is my perfect man. He loves music, he’s at inner peace with himself and helps the inner peace of others, and his wardrobe is fabulous. The fakeout with his death was terrible... and then awesome as soon as his eyes popped back open. You guys have no idea how scared I was in the Pylea finale, that I might’ve been about to lose BOTH of my favorite characters.

Which, by the way, I’m starting to think that’s one of the reasons why I don’t love season 3 of Buffy quite the way that others do. Spike and Cordelia are my two favorite characters; Spike wasn’t in season 3 and Cordelia got largely shafted after Xander broke up with her.

On Lindsey...

He’s a bro. I’m hoping we see more of him... but also not because he seems to be in a good place and if he pops up again, he probably won’t be in a good place anymore.

On what I hope for going into Season 3...

- more team bonding

- more team bonding

- more team bonding

- Cordelia being awesome

- more Cordelia/Angel friendship moments because theirs is a beautiful friendship

- more team bonding

[twentyyearsofbuffy]

#001

Buffy saved my mom's life

My mom died when I was 19, ten years after she and my other mom (it’s a whole big lesbian family) divorced. The divorce destroyed her. She basically never recovered: the last ten years of her life were pretty much a downward spiral of alcoholism, depression and generally just aggressively not taking care of herself.

The only thing that gave her joy was Buffy. I spent every other weekend at her house and we’d pretty much just watch Buffy over and over and over, and I fell in love with it too. She had a major crush on Willow. She figured out I was gay too because I blushed whenever Dawn came on screen (I know, I know, I was like 13, forgive me).

She didn’t have the emotional capacity to talk about her pain, but Buffy helped her cope with it. Once, I spied on her as she rewound the scene at the end of Tabula Rasa where Tara leaves WIllow, where Willow sits on the bathroom floor and cries while angsty Michelle Branch plays in the background. She watched that scene over and over. I think she would have died a lot sooner if she hadn’t had Buffy.

When she did pass away, the only thing I took from the house was the complete box set of DVDs. - @onlymeatballs

[ettadunham]

A Buffy rewatch 6x08 Tabula Rasa

aka i don’t think this is going to work either

Welcome to this dailyish text post series where I will rewatch an episode of Buffy and go on an impromptu rant about it for an hour. Is it about one hyperspecific thing or twenty observations? 10 or 3k words? You don’t know! I don’t know!!! In this house we don’t know things.

And today’s episode outs itself as a product of early 00s television as Michelle Branch performs in-universe to create a sad music montage, concluding an ep that’s otherwise generally remembered for its comedic beats.

Tabula Rasa is the episode that I alluded to most with Something Blue way back in season 4 – so I actually went back to that post before sitting down to write this, to fully appreciate that connection. Apparently I closed that rant saying “we’re here to do a Buffy rewatch, not to have fun”, and that’s the same energy you can expect here.

I mean, I love the silliness in Tabula Rasa, don’t get me wrong. The insane assumptions the characters make after the memory spell, based on stuff like Giles and Spike’s accent, Willow wearing Xander’s jacket, and Anya and Giles nodding off beside each other, lead to all kinds of hilarities. Just as it’s nice to see all the things that still stay the same, and what the characters do get right – like Buffy and Dawn realizing that they’re sisters as a result of their natural banter, or Willow and Tara’s sexual tension seeping through despite everything.

But the most interesting scenes for me remain to be the ones preceding that. Specifically, the talk the gang has about the revelations regarding Buffy’s resurrection at Xander and Anya’s place.

It’s just so juicy, guys, down to its smallest details. It starts with Anya wondering if Buffy walked on clouds or had a harp in heaven, and Willow just kind of looks on with dead eyes, and Xander upon prompting says something dismissive like “you have many good qualities”.

Tara though? Tara’s quick to validate Anya, saying that it’s not stupid to think about what it’s been like for Buffy, but there are many heavenly dimensions, and they just don’t know.

God, I love Tara. Did I mention that already? I think I may have been too subtle about it the last 40 times.

I LOVE TARA.

There, that felt right.

Afterwards, we get a surprising amount of self-reflection from Willow. I say “surprising”, because it’s then followed with another insane plan of “let’s wipe my friend’s memory with magic to make this go away”, so clearly, Willow needs some additional work in that department.

WILLOW:  And we took her away from that. We wrecked it for her. XANDER:  We didn’t wreck. We didn’t know. WILLOW:  We didn’t wanna know. We were so selfish. I was so selfish.

I love this, because not only is the narrative confirming what as a viewer I already deduced, it also reaffirms a quality in Willow that’s easy to look over at this stage of her character arc. Her self-awareness.

Xander is a mostly emotion-driven character. He rarely if ever interrogates his own motives, just goes with what his gut tells him is right. In this case, his go-to approach is to simplify, and focus on what feels important. Buffy’s alive, and he’s happy that she’s alive. The rest they’ll just need to work on.

Willow is pretty much the exact opposite of that. For better or worse, she needs to justify all her actions to herself, and she’s ready to beat herself up over any perceived imperfection.

Or find a quick solution to her problems that stops her from feeling any pain or guilt about it...

Tara is of course the one that gets to the heart of it all, by saying that they need to stop obsessing over what’s been already done, and just focus on helping Buffy. (To quote myself from literally 2 seconds ago: “I love Tara”.) Anya’s quick to agree with her, and Xander supports it too by saying that they just need to spend more time with Buffy.

Willow though instead has the insane idea to just wipe Buffy’s memory, because “video clubs won’t fix this”. But she can. She can fix it. Fix the world. She can make it go poof. And that’ll make her stop feeling horrible about it too.

Tara, whom I love, obviously gets upset at that. And Xander and Anya at this point just… leave. Which, you know, I get it, things are starting to get personal and they can read the room, but also…  This sort of leads to a pattern for me of the Scoobies not really holding each other responsible this season. The argument that Tara and Willow are about to have is about Willow’s approach to magic and the world and people around her. This isn’t only affecting their relationship, as the episode itself will point out.

So, ideally I feel like Xander and Anya should’ve said something too. But then again, maybe they haven’t yet truly considered the implications of what Willow was suggesting at this point, as opposed to Tara, who just found out that Willow used the same spell on her.

Remember all that self-awareness that I mentioned with Willow? Well, that goes right out the window the minute she’s confronted with something that she’s already justified in her mind. Tara specifically uses the phrase that Willow “violated her mind”, and tells her that she’s just helping herself at this point. Fixing things to her liking, including Tara herself.

Which Willow completely fails to internalize, because justifying her actions to herself is so much easier. Instead she focuses on her own fears of abandonment. (“Are you saying you’re gonna leave me?”)

With the ultimatum Tara gives to Willow about not using magic for a week, this is also perhaps our first sign that we’re heading into the direction of a magical addiction metaphor this season. I will probably talk about that more later on, but for now, I’ll just say that while the substance abuse comparison will mostly fail and muck up the original idea behind Willow’s misuse of magic, it does work to a certain degree. It’s ultimately an addiction to power.

And then there’s Giles. I pretty much already said what I wanted to say about Giles leaving with the last episode, and he’s only confirming what I already suspected there, so I’m not really going to reiterate that. In short: I get it, but it’s also the wrong way to help Buffy.

This turn of events of course doesn’t really help Dawn either. No wonder that she’s super upset with Tara for leaving by the end of the episode.

Remember: not only is Dawn the child of divorced parents, her dad has also been absent for most of her life. And then her mom and sister died, and she basically became the foster kid of this ragtag group of young adults (ft. Giles), with Tara and Willow acting as primary parenting figures.

So yeah. I feel super bad for Tara in that moment when Dawn pulls away. You can see how hard this is for Tara, but she refuses to stay in a toxic environment. But I can’t blame Dawn for being a 15-year-old with her own set of abandonment issues either, especially as she’s unaware of the context.

Meanwhile somewhere in town Buffy is making the opposite choice. This time in my rewatch, I was especially hit with seeing Buffy’s reaction after regaining her memories. During the fight, she’s all quippy as Joan, but she checks out the moment the spell is broken. I can’t help but wonder how it was probably even harder for her to have those memories rushing back after forgetting about them.

So Buffy continues her hook-up routine with Spike in order to feel something. And Spike is already being a sleazy manipulative asshole about it, with lines like “I know what kind of girl you really are”.

But then again, Spike is a vampire without a soul. We can’t really expect more from him, and neither does Buffy. That’s kind of the point, sadly enough.

Oh, and of course we’re ending the episode with Michelle Branch performing in the Bronze. Which is very early 00s of her, but strangely enough, I can’t really remember any musician of the same recognition playing before on the show. Even though the Bronze – much like the P3 club on Charmed – serves as the perfect set-up for that.

Goodbye to you all, I guess.

[counterpunches]

For the Fic Writers Ask Meme: 7 or 8, and 20

You bet your butt I’m doing both 7 and 8 bc I’m bursting at the seams over here

7. Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

The wind didn't speak. It didn't quietly cower like the Coven or blatantly forgive like Giles. It simply blew the broken pieces of Willow into blessed nothingness as she sat. And as far as she was concerned, it was the most welcoming thing on earth.

The tree was her furthest hiding spot from the cottage. Sometimes, when the prospect of living seemed too daunting and paralyzing, she needed the quiet growth and easy seclusion of the woods for company.

The magick lessons, of course, didn't help. The magick was where it all began. And ended. There was nothing Willow wanted to be farther away from than it.

A part of her was innocently fascinated with what the Coven taught her. How it was all connected—Gaia and the root systems, like millions of tiny computer wires in a vast network. But every tendril she followed in the system drew to a forsaken, shuddering end. It might have all been connected, but none of it led back to Tara.

So what was the point?

This is from one of my favorite chapters in Lotus. I loved the peeks of quiet, contemplative stillness we saw of Willow in England in Lessons and wanted to expand upon it. 

Novels could be written on Willow’s growing superiority complex, issues with magic, and control in seasons 4-6. But I love how it can be explored in fic, fic that centers on character development as well as plot. One of my favorite fics, Tempus Fugit tackles this connection between Tara and the magic beautifully. Willow’s thirst for the big magic drew her farther from Tara. At first it hadn’t been a choice, right? After Tough Love, Tara wasn’t around, and it was just Willow, alone to be Buffy’s big gun against Glory. The world was counting on her to find the big magics and save the day. But after, she was just a big gun, cocked and ready, so she kept going for herself. When Tara became divorced from magic is where things started to unravel for Willow. As LipKandy said, Tara was the big magic. (this was a phrase I used in other fandoms)

All of that is to set up this moment - here’s Willow, both filled with and hollowed out by magic. She’s learning everything from scratch, properly, as she should have been taught back in S2. That Willow is here too, in the computer metaphor. But it brings magic back to Tara, the connection that brought them together in the first place. And the one that split them apart. Magic will always be a bittersweet thing for Willow, now, divorced from Tara, who was such a crucial, integral part of magic for Willow, now gone.

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

While answering this one, I realized how little straight up dialogue is in my fics. There tends to be more dialogue interspersed with prose, building on a particular theme or character development. 

That said, I’ve got two small bits:

Tara only hesitates for the briefest of moments. “I think I was sent back to warn you,” she finally says in a much more calm voice.

“Is it the ‘from beneath you it devours’ thing? I’m still working on that, th-”

“No.” Tara interrupts. “Not ‘It’, Will.” It’s clear from the serious tone and demeanor what she means.

“Oh god,” Willow says as it sinks in. “Me.” Tara nods solemnly. “Oh god,” Willow repeats. “What did I do?”

I had fun rewriting Conversations with Dead People as part of Lotus. A lot of fun. I love every painful moment from the actual episode, so being able to play with what the show gave us (as well as the shooting script where Amber Benson was initially intended to reprise her role as Tara) and incorporate it into my own story (which takes place before S7 and merges with the first 10 or so episodes) was really rewarding. And god, I love my angst.

Also this bit I shared yesterday I just love. There’s a more to the scene where Xander devolves a bit in his guilt. Willow and Xander...they have a friendship that can save the world. Its easy to forget how long they’ve been in each other’s lives and how deeply they know each other; how much they’re family even before the Scoobies. They’re a pair. Peanut butter and jelly. Chocolate and peanut butter. All the Scoobies could drown in the respective guilts they all carry. But together, sharing pain and talking about it (which they decidedly do NOT do nearly enough) they can be buoyed and stay afloat. 

20. Describe your perfect writing conditions

Anyplace with either quiet or white noise and empty hours ahead. I need large chunks of time.