#also yes if you’re wondering it Is because i cut myself using the knife

[separatist-apologist]

Lying In Between The Memories

You could call it paradise but it looks just like hell to me

Summary: Following the blood rite, Gwyneth Berdara can't shake the memories of a life long-gone.

The shadowsinger can't seem to move on after five centuries of loving the same woman.

Together, they'll have to carve a new path forward.

Read on AO3 | Previous Chapter

[ongoing TW for Sexual Assault]

The tension in the room was so thick, Gwyn could have cut it with a knife. Azriel looked wild and somehow pained, his expressions shifting second to second along with what must have been his chaotic thoughts. She exhaled a breath and pressed a hand to his chest, which seemed to strengthen some unknowable resolve.

“Everything will be fine,” she began, wondering if she was reassuring him or herself. “We’ll talk to Eris—”

“Let me take you home,” Azriel interrupted. Gwyn nearly screamed out loud. Of course that was his solution. Of course he’d think she should go back to Prythian, leaving him to deal with whatever the Vanserras wanted while she sat in a library.

“Are you serious right now?” she asked, taking a step away from him. Crossing his arms over his chest, it was clear that yes, Azriel was very serious. 

“The Vanserras are dangerous,” Azriel said, his voice pitched lower than was typical. “You don’t know what you’re dealing with.”

“Oh, but you do? I’m dangerous, Az, and I can handle myself just fine. If you want to go home so badly, be my guest. I won’t stop you. But I’m staying.”

“Gwyn—”

“No. No. I can’t…I won’t do this with you, Azriel. Either you mean it when you say you care about me—that you trust me, or you don’t. Decide. Right now. Either we’re equals or we’re not and I just want to know where I stand with you.”

This was it and Gwyn knew it. Whatever Azriel said would determine how they moved forward—if they moved forward at all. After everything that had happened between them, it seemed almost cruel to provide him with an ultimatum, but Gwyn wasn’t going back. She wasn’t going to hide in the library, lost in her regrets and wishing things could be different. They were different. 

She was different. 

There was no point following through on the promises she’d just been willing to make if Azriel was never going to make good on his. Why train her, why teach her to use weapons or how to take the likes of him down if every time there was danger, Azriel was going to swoop in and hide her away?

What was his problem? 

There clearly was one, because the only reasonable answer was to immediately assure her that he trusted her. Not war with himself between what he actually wanted—she assumed that was her returning to Velaris—and knowing that if he took her back, she’d never see him again. Gwyn’s heart thudded in her throat against the long stretch of silence.

“I—” His throat bobbed, working against whatever emotion he was swallowing. “I’m sorry—I…I’m scared.”

The admission hung between them. Azriel was so many things to Gwyn and frightened was never one of them. Azriel wasn’t afraid of anything, including death. How many stories had she heard of him running head long into battle, damning the consequences? What could he possibly be afraid of when surely Eris Vanserra was no threat to the likes of him?

“Eris is all talk,” she dismissed, sliding around him in an effort to clear her senses. She could still feel his rigid cock held in her hand and if she wasn’t careful, she’d make Eris wait on them.

Presumably, for hours. 

It was a good plan—one she would have succeeded in, had Azriel not followed just behind her. Dragging a hand through his hair with frustration, Azriel growled, “He has plenty of bite—don’t let his pretty face fool you.”

“Oh, is it pretty? I hadn’t noticed,” she said with too much innuendo. She hadn’t meant to be so suggestive, though she also didn’t mind that soft growl that slipped from Azriel’s throat. He’d always been a little territorial—obnoxiously so, if she was being honest—but now? This was why she hadn’t wanted to sleep with him. He was going to take things too far. 

That should have bothered her, but right then, Gwyn wanted Azriel to take things too far. It was the worst possible time, in the worst possible place, and she couldn’t really focus on the threat of the Vanserra’s because Azriel was staring down at her with eyes so dark there might have been no color to them at all. Just endless pools of starless night threatening to devour her. 

Azriel cocked his head to the side, all animal, and Gwyn knew right then, that he could scent what she wasn’t trying to conceal. He didn’t seem to breathe as she dared to come closer, pressing her hand to his still chest. 

“I don’t care about Eris Vanserra,” she murmured, peering up at him through dark lashes. “Lock the door. He can wait.”

“Gwyn,” he whispered, his voice hoarse.

She didn’t think she could take it if he told her no. Her pride certainly could not withstand that level of rejection no matter how valid it was. Gwyn was tempted to say something to him that might change his mind, but right then she felt nervous. Too vulnerable for speech, too embarrassed to do anything but remain rooted in place as the realization of what she’d said swept over her.

Oh. Oh no. 

She was becoming the thing she’d sworn she wouldn’t be. Resolve slammed into her, stealing her spine as the memory of all those months training washed back over her. The recognition that this, right here, was why she had to quit training with him. Why she needed to step away before he did any more irreversible damage to herself. 

Oblivious to her racing thoughts, perhaps to her detriment, Azriel grabbed her upper arm the moment she started to step back and without a word, pressed his mouth to her own. She’d expected hunger and heat—not desperation to greet her. His other arm wound around her waist, holding her so tightly there was nowhere to go. That was by design, though Gwyn had nowhere she wanted to go.

There were a million things to be afraid of, but this right here—and the way she felt about him? That was, perhaps, the most terrifying thing. Instinct warred between walking away from him again and staying where she was, letting go and giving in, pulling and pushing until Gwyn was muddled and confused.

And yet there was clarity in that kiss. Reason, among the madness, was found in his lips. She didn’t realize they were moving, that she was taking steps toward something until Azriel was pulling her into his lap, himself seated on that sofa. 

“If I start,” he breathed, trailing his mouth over her jaw and down her neck, “I won’t be able to stop.” Something twanged within her—something old, something primal. “Good,” she replied, raking her fingers through his dark hair. 

“You deserve better than this,” he said, scarred hands coming to cup her face so she had to look at him. “Better than a rushed coupling so I can race off to deal with Eris. Wait for me. For tonight,” he added, a plea to his words. 

Wrapping her fingers around his wrists, Gwyn met that hungry, desperate gaze. “Together?”

“We’ll do everything together,” he swore softly, a lethal menace to those words. “Let someone try and stop us.”

Gwyn kissed him again, unable to deny what she felt or what was happening between them. Love. 

This was love. 

Somewhere between swearing she’d never train with him again and looking into those hazel eyes swearing he’d do everything with her if she wanted. Goosebumps erupted over her arms, drawing ice through her fingers. She was excited and she was scared all at once. Dread and elation pooled in her gut though Gwyn did a good job of concealing both. Azriel didn’t seem alarmed by what he saw, at any rate. 

“Can you stand?” she asked when Azriel shifted his hips, revealing the hard cock just beneath.

Closing his eyes, head tipped back, he breathed, “Give me a moment. If I think about Vanserra long enough, it’ll pass.”

Gwyn tried to slide off his lap, and was too delighted when he tightened his grip, holding her tight. “You hate him so much. Why?”

Azriel looked up at the ceiling. “He’s a bastard.”

“That’s not a real reason. Tell me.”

“When I was young—in my twenties—Eris was engaged to Mor.”

The words hung between them for a moment, weighty as Azriel considered what he wanted to say. This was ancient, then. Old, unfinished business between them that Azriel had never forgotten. 

He didn’t look at her as he added, “I was in love with her.”

Oh. 

Gwyn could see Mor so clearly in her mind right then. Beautiful in such an easy, effortless way. All that golden hair, her beautiful eyes…and the way she’d been looking at Emerie, she reminded herself before jealousy could fully take root. It was impossible, though, not to compare herself to Mor. Not to imagine Azriel with his fingers curled around Mor’s waist, his lips against her neck—

“Mor was never interested in me,” Azriel continued, blazing through this confession like he needed to say it. “But I thought, back then at least…maybe…it didn’t matter. She was engaged to Eris and Rhys could do nothing about it. Wouldn’t do anything about it,” Azriel added, as if that were important to the story or to him. Gwyn certainly wasn’t going to wade into that old fight, though she saw there were leftover scars that had healed poorly. 

“Mor took things into her own hands—she came to our camp in Illyria and she slept with Cassian. Virginity…it’s…it’s important in the Autumn Court. It’s an old custom for females of nobility and a point of pride for males. Mor decided if no one would help her, she would do what we’d always done—she’d help herself.”

“You slept with her?” Gwyn questioned, her blood turning to ice. She didn’t think she could stand knowing that Azriel had both loved her and slept with her, unfair as it was. This was centuries old, a drama older than her, than her parents, and likely her grandparents. 

Azriel shook his head. “No. I told you…she never wanted me. She went to Cassian. Everyone knew. It was an open secret in the camp, and secrets like that are hard to keep. There was no love lost between the three of us and the rest of the Illyrian’s, who already felt we were given special treatment because we were so close to the High Lord. Someone told Keir—but rumor had already begun to spread around Hewn City and Beron knew before Keir could control the situation.”

Azriel took a breath as if he needed to control himself. Gwyn swore she could feel his rage somehow, though maybe it was just her own anger as she imagined what it must have been like for Mor back then. Sold, by her own parents, like she was mere cattle for breeding. Knowing that she had no good options and still trying to do something that gave her agency. 

“Keir nailed a note to Mor’s womb and dumped her into Autumn letting them know she was their problem now,” Azriel whispered, his voice lethal. Whatever Gwyn had been imagining paled in comparison to the reality. 

“Eris could have helped her. He found her before me—we weren’t allowed to step foot into Autumn so we had to wait. Cassian, Rhys and I…we were patrolling sections of the border between Autumn, Summer, Spring, and Winter. Flying overhead, trying to find her, we—we were going to get her even if it started a war. But it was Eris who found her first. Who saw how injured she was, who could have helped. He left her there, where I found her hours later and…” 

Azriel fell silent, eyes glazed as he relived that moment. As he considered what it still meant to him and the hatred he’d never be able to let go of. 

“He’ll say he couldn’t intervene. That it was better, politically, to look the other way while I stalked across that border and brought her into Summer. But the truth is Eris is a coward, too scared to do anything that might endanger him, first. He’d let his brothers die, he’d let his mother suffer, and he’d see the rest of the world burn to keep himself safe first and I hate him for it.”

There was nothing else to say. Even if Gwyn did have a defense for Eris—and she didn’t—she wouldn’t have offered it up to Azriel. There were other questions she had, questions that felt too embarrassing to ask.

Are you still in love with Mor? 

She swallowed that one, terrified he’d say yes. What had happened, in the aftermath? She’d never wanted him, so maybe nothing at all…but had something? And did he know they’d had a whole dinner in Velaris right before Gwyn left specifically trying to catch Mor’s attention because Emerie thought she was beautiful? 

Questions better left for another time.

“So how do we play this?” she asked instead, because she wanted to be a team more than she wanted to plumb the depths of his life before her. Gwyn simply had to trust that, at least here and now, she was the only female Azriel cared about. That whatever feelings he had for Mor had fizzled over the years until only friendship remained. Perhaps when Eris was gone, and they were back in Velaris.

Or maybe Gwyn would tell Nesta all this and they could compare notes. Did she know Cassian had slept with Mor? Did she even care? Gwyn couldn’t imagine Nesta being cool about it, but what did she truly know? Nesta and Cassian were mates and that changed things.

“Carefully,” Azriel said after a moment, his expression wiped clean of its former fury. “Eris’s weapons are his words. Give him nothing to work with, let him back himself into a corner. And we can’t kill him.”

“Are you saying that to me or yourself?”

“Is there a difference?” he murmured without any awareness of what he was implying. “Knives stay under the skirts.”

“I’m tired of dresses,” Gwyn mumbled, swinging her legs off him to stand. 

“I’ll have you out of them soon enough.”

He couldn’t see the grin that spread over her face, though he likely knew the heat spreading through her. Gwyn merely waved her hand.

“Big words, Shadowsinger.”

AZRIEL:

Unlike Eris, Azriel didn’t need a mask for his boredom. He was bored—irritated, even, made worse by Gwyn sitting close enough his knee was touching hers. Fully clothed when her perfect hand had been wrapped around his cock and she’d been all but begging him to take her. Gods, Azriel couldn’t focus on a smug word leaving Eris’s mouth. And Eris knew it. Knew what Gwyn hadn’t yet figured out, putting a countdown on a conversation Azriel wasn’t sure how to have. He’d just gotten her to open up to him and Eris was going to wreck it all before Azriel built the sort of intimacy he was certain he needed.

All he knew for certain was the information had to come from him rather than Eris Vanserra. Gwyn, lovely, perfect Gwyn, was doing the hard work of making small talk with Eris. She’d put on her most charming demeanor and Azriel wondered if she wasn’t playing dumb on purpose. Eris, on the other hand, had a gleam in his eye reminiscent of a wolf unaware his sheep was really a dragon in disguise. 

“I’ve never been to Autumn,” Gwyn was saying, tucking a long piece of that cinnamon colored hair behind an arched ear.

Azriel was in love with her and gods, but he wanted to tell her so badly it made his teeth ache. She played Eris so well—hadn’t the first born son been told Gwyn was a scholar from the Night Court? And wouldn’t he assume she was smarter than the average High Fae? But Eris was buying her bright eyed, too-idealistic act which left Azriel left to play the brooding bodyguard. That was a role he knew all too well, at least. And Eris had the decency to keep his eyes fully on Gwyn’s beautiful face rather than let it drift.

Azriel might have abandoned his no violence policy had Eris not managed this. He had one hand clenched beneath the table, nails digging into his palm to keep himself from squeezing the life from Eris’s smug, imperious eyes.

As Eris described Autumn to an enraptured Gwyn, Azriel’s thoughts once again drifted to his mate. He needed to tell her. It was a last ditch attempt, sleeping with her and hoping it snapped for her then. Azriel knew that had worked for Cassian in theory. Nesta had felt it…and chose not to acknowledge it.

He might go insane if that happened to him and Gwyn. So focused on his inner thoughts, Azriel nearly missed Gwyn’s sweet, “Is the High Lord joining us?”

“He’s around,” Eris replied with a bored wave of his hand. “I’m certain he’s looking for Helion—”

“Helion?” Azriel interrupted. Helion arriving had Rhys written all over it. Eris’s eyes shifted, that smile sharpening at the corners. Fuck. Azriel hadn’t meant to say anything at all. 

“Did your High Lord not inform you? Fascinating given how long you’ve been here…”

Azriel didn’t respond, leaving Gwyn to scramble. Without missing a beat, she threw that sunny smile on her face and said, “We’re only here for the library. I can’t remember the last time the prince stopped by to say hello. I’m sure he’s too busy for us.”

Eris glanced up at Azriel, two lines of concern creasing between his brow. “You haven’t seen him?”

“In at least a week,” Gwyn replied without betraying her real question. “Perhaps we will now that more emissaries from Prythian are visiting.”

“I was under the impression–” Eris stopped himself before he could finish that thought. Gwyn glanced “Well. I suppose we’ll all learn together, won’t we?”

Gwyn’s smile never wavered. “It’ll be nice to get to know all the new courts. We could keep in touch.”

Eris was clearly lost in his own thoughts, eyes drifting across the room. Azriel turned his head to look, curious what had drawn Eris’s attention from the cat and mouse game happening at their current table. Helion had sauntered in, every inch the Day Court High Lord in his white draped robe and the gold jewelry adorning his gleaming bronze skin. Something about him was striking right then—an expression Azriel had seen once before, though he couldn’t remember when.

Eris’s upper lip had curled with distaste, his dislike plain against his features. Flanked on either side of the High Lord were two others—a rather beautiful blonde with a book tucked beneath her arm and a male with the same onyx colored hair as the High Lord. Both wore azure clothes, their eyes lined with kohl.

The trio didn’t spare Night and Autumn a second look, making their way toward the high table. Eris didn’t take his eyes off them until they were fully behind them, though his expression was inscrutable. Still, it was something. It shouldn’t have surprised Azriel that Eris didn’t like any of the other courts, nor was it really worth following up on, and yet he would have been a poor spymaster if he didn’t order his shadows after both Helion and Eris.

After all, Eris and Helion would likely be trying to spy on him, too. The High Lords loved their secrets almost as much as they loved their games. Whatever was going on between Autumn and Day was for them—not Night. Azriel and Gwyn were nearly done, besides. She merely needed to finish her cypher for the two to return with her stolen book on Koschei. They didn’t need anything else—not really. Though, it occurred to him right then that his shadow had never returned from Koschei’s lake. 

Strange.

He’d need to follow up on that. 

Azriel was distracted and couldn’t even pretend he didn’t know why. If he’d come alone he’d be on top of all of this and right then, Azriel wondered if Rhys hadn’t suspected. Of all the people…of everyone who could have come, Rhys had insisted it be Gwyn. Untested. Unknown. Azriel’s mate. Had his brother suspected? 

No.

No, Rhys would have warned him surely. Or, at the very least, put them in a better environment. Though…Azriel remembered all the shenanigans Rhys had gotten up to with Feyre around and oblivious. Maybe not. Azriel was spinning himself in circles, unable to focus and he knew he wouldn’t until Gwyn knew, too.

At least then he could free himself of the indecision. Get back to working—throw himself into it, even, if need be. He’d always been good at distracting himself, and this would be no exception. He had centuries of practice with Mor, though Azriel suspected this would be infinitely more painful.

Pain was home, though. He lived there, loved there—worshiped at its altar. 

Glancing at Eris, Azriel wondered if the prince of Autumn didn’t understand that, in some strange way. He almost felt pity, catching a familiar look of yearning streak across Eris’s features—gone so quickly Azriel could have lied to himself and said he imagined it. 

“Did you want something, Eris?” Azriel demanded, ignoring the cooling food on his plate.

Eris offered a fox’s smile. “Only the pleasure of your stimulating company.”

Gwyn never broke character, which was more than Azriel could boast. She merely continued eating, pretending this was a normal conversation between normal people. Friends, even. Eris stood, though, catching the eye of his father striding into the room with the king.

“Bye!” she called after Eris’s retreating back before adding, “Prick,” under her breath.

“You were charming,” Azriel said from the side of his mouth, noting how neither father or son deigned to look in his direction. Why would they? He was merely a bastard born Illyrian, after all. Trash, as far as they were concerned. 

“Isn’t that why I’m here? To smooth out your edges?” she teased and gods, he wanted her so badly it was making a fool of him.

“More than you know,” he replied, pulling his wings tighter against his body to keep them from flaring outward. Not that anyone would understand what that meant, and still it was probably better not to have a preening, territorial Illyrian stomping about the dining hall.

He needed to get them both out which was harder than he thought it would be given Gwyn was fixated on the missing prince. “Where is Kai, do you think?” she asked when Azriel stood, unconcerned himself. Who cared? Kai’s absence was the only good thing that had happened lately, utterly eradicating any competition to Gwyn Azriel might have had.

After all, he wasn’t convinced he could compete with a prince. 

She would have realized, had Kai stuck around, the choices being offered. Would have realized she could live easier with Kai than she ever could in Velaris, no matter how much she loved it. And Azriel had nearly convinced himself that she would have chosen Kai—because why would anyone choose him when there was another option readily available—until Gwyn murmured, “I miss Nesta and Emerie.”

Walking down the hall with her, Azriel glanced down at Gwyn, his expression inviting her to continue. 

“It’s just…I would have told them about Eris, and we would have laughed about how pathetic he is. And I’ll bet Nesta knows something about that courtier from Day he was staring at—”

“What courtier?” Azriel demanded, his shadows swirling around his shoulders.

“The blonde. You didn’t see? He had tragedy written all over him when she came in.”

He didn’t need to tell the shadow slinking away what to do. If Gwyn thought she saw something—however absurd it felt—then Azriel would follow up on it. 

“We’ll be home soon enough,” Azriel said, pulling their shared door open so she could sweep in, still a princess, even if all she had was him. “You can tell Nesta and Emerie everything then.”

“Everything?” Gwyn challenged, crossing her arms over her chest to stare him down. 

“Most things,” Azriel amended. “Nesta tells Cassian too much and I don’t need him knowing what I do when he’s not around.”

“Why would he care?” Gwyn pressed, but Azriel didn’t want to talk about Cassian for another moment. Didn’t want to think about Cassian. This was as good of a moment as he was going to get, he reasoned. There would never be any time better, at least while they were in this palace. 

Azriel didn’t answer, unwilling to admit Cassian would find it all absurdly funny much in the same way he and Rhys had a good laugh over Cassian’s trouble with Nesta, and how Cassian and Azriel had been so amused by how oblivious Feyre had been to Rhys’s obvious affection.

They weren’t blood brothers.

But stupidity ran between them like a cord, strong as any mating bond. Reaching for her face, Azriel kissed her before she could say another word, hoping to pick up where they’d left off just before Eris had so rudely interrupted them.

He hadn’t forgotten the pleasure of her soft hand gripping his aching cock, nor could he erase the look in her eyes from his memory. That sultry look was enough to drive him to his knees, to make him beg, crawl, plead. He’d do anything she demanded and more simply because it was her lips speaking the words. 

She didn’t protest, melting against the leather of his armor he was now desperate to get rid himself of. Instead, Gwyn kissed him back, hoisting herself up on tiptoes until Azriel said fuck it and lifted her into the air, if only for an excuse to put his hands on her ass. 

He was brainless by the time he managed to walk them into his bed chamber, made weak by her tongue stroking his own and her fingers in his hair. Had he ever been so aroused? So desperate? So excited? Azriel racked his brain for an answer but none came. There was only those teal eyes, that freckled skin.

“Is this happening?” she asked him, her breath warm against his cheek.

“If you want me, I’m yours,” he replied, saying the only words that came to him. 

Stroking his cheek, Gwyn looked down at him, her hair forming a curtain around them. “I want you. You’re mine.”

A groan slipped from behind his lips, their gazes locked. 

They were doing this.

“I’m yours,” he repeated.

I’m yours. 

[makerofmadness]

NEW AND IMPROVED: incorrect FNAF quotes

Uh just forget all the previous posts I can't remember half the quotes I made and also some of them are outdated lore-wise or headcanon-wise so time for a grand reopening of the series(?). May have done some of these quotes exactly the same in the past but heck if I know-

Contains: Headcanons, spoilers for Ruin, hopefully no big mistakes/words I forgot to replace

Speaking of headcanons: I hc that the "classic fnaf" era night guards are all the fnaf 4 bullies. So Michael, Fritz, Jeremy, and the last one is entirely an OC (whom I had described in my old quotes posts but I've renamed her now 'Cus I accidentally gave her the same name as a BATIM character whoops-): Susanna "Susie" Hudson. She's the FNAF 3 guard.

as was before, I get these quotes from the perchance generator and just insert the characters in manually.

quotes under the cut:

Gregory (seeing that one unexplained room): Is… Is that meant to be on fire? Roxanne Wolf: No… not really. Gregory: Are you going to do something about it? Roxanne Wolf: Hm… nah.

-

Michael Afton: Sometimes I wonder if I’m hearing voices. Michael Afton: Then I remember that’s the last bit of sanity I have trying to get me to fall asleep at a reasonable time.

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Mangle: You know the sound a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That's the sound that my brain makes all the time.

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Susanna Hudson: I’m genuinely surprised you haven’t gotten arrested, let alone gotten a felony yet.  Fritz Smith: Nat 20 Charisma.  Susanna Hudson: That is NOT how that works- 

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Golden Freddy: If karma doesn't hit you, I fucking will.  -

Mangle: I don’t care what anyone thinks about me. Withered Foxy: Ok. Mangle: Wait, why such a muted reaction? Did that not sound cool?

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Mangle: Welcome to Fucking Applebees, do you want apples or bees? Jeremy Fitzgerald: Bees? Mangle: HE HAS SELECTED THE BEES! Jeremy Fitzgerald: Wait- *Toy Chica approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly* ('Twas but an allegory for the Bite of 87-)

-

Fritz Smith: I wasn’t that drunk.  Jeremy Fitzgerald: You colored my face with a highlighter because you said I was important.  Fritz Smith: BECAUSE YOU ARE!  -

The Puppet: Bonnie, are you drinking… drinking hydrogen peroxide?! Toy Bonnie: It says H2O2! That means it’s the sequel to water! -

Michael Afton: I'm not a morning person. I'm barely even a person.

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Circus Baby: Pardon me, but it sounds like you’re questioning my authority! Funtime Foxy: Not at all, Baby. Merely your primitive methods.

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Crying Child (FNAF 4), after having a nosebleed: Welp. Time to wash the blood off my hands.

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Gregory: Can we go to a haunted house? Vanessa: What’s wrong with the one we live in? Gregory: Wh-what? Vanessa: Goodnight, Gregory.

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Toy Bonnie: Here is my wall of inspirational people. Withered Bonnie: Is that a picture of you? Toy Bonnie: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

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The Mimic: I have one of your friends. Glamrock Freddy: Which one? I have seven. The Mimic: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up. Glamrock Freddy: Which one? I have seven. Roxanne Wolf, distantly: HEY!!!

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Michael Afton: What’s the status up here? Fritz Smith: Fucked up, about to die, Jeremy's a nerd. The usual.

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Roxanne Wolf: You're pathetic! Gregory: You're pathetic-er! Vanny: You're both losers.

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*Comments under an image of a really hot knife cutting bread* Molten Freddy: Imagine stabbing someone with this knife. Helpy: It would instantly cauterize the wound, so the person wouldn't bleed, so it's not very useful. Rockstar Chica: if you want information it is Music Man: why would you STAB a person when you can have TOAST?

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Ennard: I’ve never been in a snowball fight before. I don’t know the rules. Michael Afton: What? Ennard: Is there a point system, or is it to the death?

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*Michael Afton rushes by with an armful of water bottles* Funtime Chica: What's going on? Rockstar Foxy: Mike wouldn't drink water. Funtime Chica: …And? Rockstar Foxy: And I asked him how fast he could chug an entire bottle. Michael Afton, loudly: 16 OUNCES IN TEN SECONDS, BITCHES!

-

Roxanne Wolf: Sometimes I talk to myself for no reason. Roxanne Wolf: Me too!

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Montgomery Gator: Do you think different paints have different tastes? Glamrock Chica: They do. Glamrock Freddy: …Why did you say that with such certainty?

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William Afton: You might not know this, Henry, but I am a flawed person. Henry Emily: I do know that.

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William Afton: I could kill you if I wanted. Michael Afton: Yeah? So could any other human being. So could a dog. So could a dedicated duck. You aren't special.

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Dee Dee: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.

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Funtime Freddy: I have one brain cell and it bounces around in my skull like a windows screen saver. Funtime Freddy: When it hits a corner perfect, I’m allowed one good idea.

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Cassie: You're ignoring all your problems. Eclipse: I know. Cassie: You also know it's an unhealthy coping mechanism? Eclipse: I'm ignoring that fact as well. Cassie:

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Withered Foxy: What do people in relationships even do? Toy Freddy: Care about someone with your whole heart and dedicate your life to making them happy. Withered Foxy: Okay. Didn't ask. Toy Chica: Asks question Toy Chica: "Didn't ask" Withered Foxy: Thanks for the play by play, Captain Fuck.

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Withered Foxy: BB? What are you doing here? Balloon Boy, standing in the office: My best.

-

The Squad: *walking around the Pizzaplex* Moon: Hey, have any of you guys seen Chica? She's been gone for a while.. Vanessa: Eh, nope. Montgomery Gator: No, I haven’t… Roxanne Wolf: Probably ran off to get pizza or something. Glamrock Chica: Hey. Moon: Ooh, there you are- Vanessa: What the fu- Roxanne Wolf: I- where were you?! Glamrock Chica: Walking right behind you guys.

-

Funtime Freddy: Bon-Bon! Eggs Benedict got that thing on the control panel working! Bon-Bon: Wow! That looks pretty impressive. Funtime Freddy: Yeah! Bon-Bon: Any idea what it does? Funtime Freddy: Not a clue.

-

Gregory: I just learned a way to get stuff on the cheap. Steal it!

-

Cassie: You have to apologize to Roxy! Gregory: Fine! Gregory: Unfuck you, or whatever!

-

Michael Afton: Rockstar Bonnie just said "I have an appetite for destruction" and then he reached down and untied my shoe.

-

Gregory: School sucks. Vanessa: I know, but you have to do it so you can get a job. Gregory: What are jobs like? Vanessa: They suck.

-

The Mimic: I am literally evil incarnate. The Mimic: I’m not actually, I just enjoy being evil. The Mimic: Which I think actually makes it even more evil because I’m making a conscious effort.

-

William Afton: Something’s off. Henry Emily: Maybe you’ve finally developed human emotions and feel bad for hurting people. William Afton: No, but that’s funny.

-

Montgomery Gator: Do you ever think? Because I do not.

-

Gregory: What language do they speak at the center of the earth? Gregory: Core-ean Glamrock Freddy: The center of the earth is arond 5430 degrees Celsius! Nobody is going to live there so they don’t need a language! Vanessa: Core-ean.

-

Toy Bonnie: I don’t know the first thing about clothes. Pretty much all I can do is look at something and tell you if it’s clothes or not. This chair? Not clothes.

-

Roxanne Wolf: How would you like your hair cut? Montgomery Gator: Preferably with scissors, but a sword could be badass.

-

Withered Chica, looking at her reflection: Now, that's rubbish. Who's that supposed to be? Toy Chica: Well, that's you. Withered Chica: Me?! Is that what I look like? Toy Chica You don't know? Withered Chica: Busy day.

-

Withered Bonnie, to Toy Bonnie: All right, let’s tell each other a secret about ourselves. I’m going to go first– I hate you.

-

Jeremy Fitzgerald: We need to distract these guys. Fritz Smith: Leave it to me. Fritz Smith: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss. Toy Freddy & Toy Bonnie: *immediately begin arguing*

-

Susanna Hudson: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body. Fritz Smith: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot. Susanna Hudson: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS! Michael Afton: Hmm… I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free… not sure where you're getting your facts from…

-

Circus Baby: What’s wrong? You look 10 seconds away from ripping someone’s throat out. Ballora: Fucking Freddy and Foxy were trying to invoke one of the minor gods again last night. I didn't get an ounce of sleep, thanks to their bloody chanting.

-

Circus Baby: All in all, a 100 successful trip. Funtime Freddy: But we lost Bon-Bon. Circus Baby: All in all, a 100 successful trip!

-

(FNAF humans be like:)

Susanna Hudson: *fills up bottle and drinks from that* Vanessa: *brought 4 bottles of water so this wouldn’t happen* Cassie: *drinks straight from the tap* Crying Child: *dehydrates* Gregory: *drinks from the puddle of water on the floor* Michael Afton: *licks the tap, doesn’t even need a drink*

-

Cassie: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait. Gregory: You and me! Cassie: *tearing up* Ok.

(we can pretend the ending never happened just a bit-)

-

Chica: Why's it called an oven when you of in the cold food and you of out hot eat the food? Freddy: …What???

-

Gregory, holding a scooter: Vanessa! Can I go outside and play with this? Vanessa Sure, whatever. I'm not your parent, okay? Gregory, running outside: Thanks Vanessa! Vanessa, running out after him and screaming: NOT ON THE STREET! STAY AWAY!

-

Jeremy Fitzgerald: Look, last night was a mistake. Fritz Smith: A sexy mistake. Jeremy Fitzgerald: No, just a regular mistake.

-

Mangle: Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, and wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. Toy Freddy: That's deep. Toy Bonnie: That means that ketchup is a smoothie. Toy Freddy: That's deeper. The Puppet: …You guys are idiots.

-

RWQFSFASXC: I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

-

Withered Chica: You know, when I first met you I thought you were a real bitch. Toy Chica: What changed your mind? Withered Chica: Oh, I still think you're a bitch. I've just grown to like that about you.

-

Freddy: Don't break someone's heart, they only have one. Golden Freddy: Break one of their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

-

*1987's game of Among Us in real life* Jeremy Fitzgerald: I believe Fritz is innocent, I was with them the whole time. Mr. Afton, what were you doing? William Afton: Oh, I was just murdering… I mean, nothing!

-

Toy Bonnie: Is the pink panther a lion? Withered Bonnie: Say that again but slower. Toy Bonnie: I don’t get it. Withered Bonnie: He’s a PANTHER. Toy Bonnie: Is that a type of lion? Withered Bonnie: No, it’s a fucking panther. Toy Bonnie: *googles panther* They aren't pink? Withered Bonnie: AND LIONS ARE?!

-

Henry Emily: Do you have any skeletons in your closet? William Afton: Literally or figuratively? Henry Emily: I have to specify?

-

Bonnie: Yesterday, I watched Foxy try to eat a decorative rock from the night guard's potted plant. The Puppet caught him, and told him that he can't eat rocks. Chica started whining something about no food being in the house before walking away.

-

Susanna Hudson: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”. Michael Afton: *looks over at Fritz Smith and Jeremy Fitzgerald*  Michael Afton: Is it “sexual tension”?

-

Gregory, after acquiring the Fazer-blaster: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

-

*after discussing the plan to burn down Fazbear's Fright* Susanna Hudson: Does anyone have any questions? Jeremy Fitzgerald: Is this legal? Susanna Hudson: Does anyone have any relevant questions?

-

Dee Dee: Don’t worry, I have a permit. Old Man Consequences: …This just says “I can do what I want”.

-

Fritz Smith: You look good in that hoodie. Jeremy Fitzgerald: You know where else I'd look good? Fritz Smith, zero hesitation: My bed. Jeremy Fitzgerald, at the same time: By your side- wait, what?

-

Helpi: Fun Fact! The average person will walk by 36 murderers in their lifetime. Cassie: I like how this is a "fun" fact. MXES: It's fun because they didn't decide to murder you.

-

Susanna Hudson: Just be careful, Mike! Michael Afton: heading out the door I'm always careful, Susie! Michael Afton: It's everything around me that's careless.

-

The Puppet: We are not mad. We are just disappointed. Golden Freddy: No, we are mad. The Puppet: Yes. We are. We are livid. But we are going to let this one slide. Golden Freddy: No, we’re not! The Puppet: I am not a mind reader, Cassidy!

-

Cassie: Do you take constructive criticism? Helpi: No, only cash or credit.

-

Roxanne Wolf: I typed "bitch" into my GPS and guess what? I'm in your driveway. Gregory: Roxanne Wolf: Vroom vroom, come out already.

-

Phone Guy: *Answers phone* Hello? Fritz Smith: It's Fritz Smith. Phone Guy: What did he do this time? Fritz Smith: No, it's me, phone guy. It's actually me. Phone Guy: What did you do this time?

-

Vanessa: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

-

Golden Freddy, referring to the Fazbear Gang(tm): Those guys are dorks. The Puppet: Yes, but they’re my dorks.

-

Glamrock Chica: Are you busy? Montgomery Gator: No. Glamrock Chica: Want to do something? Montgomery Gator: Why would you try to ruin this for me?

-

Susanna Hudson: Go to hell! Springtrap: Oh! I’ve been there, thank you. I found it quite lovely.

-

Elizabeth Afton: When was the last time you cried? Crying Child: Uh 15 minutes ago, why?? Elizabeth Afton: really? That recent? Crying Child: Yeah *voice crack* is that an issue? starts crying again

-

JJ: So I can either do something dumb that could very well get me injured or I can listen to the Puppet and not do the thing, JJ: Well there’s a clear right answer here. JJ: *proceeds to throw five packs of mentos into a barrel full of diet coke*

-

Ennard: You have an impressive pain tolerance. Michael Afton: Thanks, it's the trauma.

-

Sun, dashing into the room: WHY AREN’T THE DISHES IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER?! Vanessa: …What does that even mean?!

-

Susanna Hudson, toward Michael Afton: Wow, left-handed AND British? You really are an illusion.

-

Freddy: We’re kind of missing something guys. Bonnie: Cohesion? Chica: Teamwork? Foxy: A general sense of what we’re doing? Golden Freddy: And the Puppet is not here. Chica: Oh, and that, yeah.

-

Michael Afton: Ennard, can you help me? All of my clothes keep disappearing for some reason. Ennard, wearing a hoodie that's 5 times bigger than their size: Spooky.

-

Roxanne Wolf: Tired of just deserving better. Gonna start taking it by force.

-

Scraptrap: *dies* Helpy: Timer starts now! When is he coming back? I say two months! Music Man: Bullshit. One month. Lefty: Nah, half a month. Rockstar Foxy, sobbing: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? SOMEONE JUST DIED! Mr. Hippo, scratching chin in thought: One week.

-

Michael Afton: I’ve been sleeping so little the past few nights that when I go to the alarm app, I click on the “power nap” button. I don’t set up alarms, I set up timers, Helpy.

-

Roxanne Wolf: Let’s not Gregory this into a worse situation than it already is. Gregory: Did you just use my name as a verb?

-

Scrap Baby: Tommorrow's garbage day. Molten Freddy: I can't believe they made a whole day dedicated to you.

-

Glamrock Freddy: *lifting weights* Montgomery Gator: Wow… He's so intense! Glamrock Chica: I wonder what drives him. Glamrock Freddy, internally: (Oh I am going to be SO good at giving hugs.)

-

Fritz Smith: The greatest trick the devil ever played was getting me banned from an all you can eat pizza buffet. Jeremy Fitzgerald: Why’d you get banned? Fritz Smith: Touched the bear. Jeremy Fitzgerald: … What bear? Fritz Smith: Feddy Fazbear

[summertimeflamingo]

people are sooo weird about groomed poodles they’re like “yeah only annoying rich pretentious people style their poodles like that” you’re telling me you wouldn’t customize your dog if you got a poodle?? your dog would look like a bland human skyrim default man and my dog would look like an electric blue lizard man with a mullet. my dog might HAVE a mullet. unless my hypothetical pre-pet research indicated it was unwise for the pets health somehow that bitch would get a new haircut every time it grew back out and it would be BRIGHT PINK (radish water babes, as long as it isn’t allergic you can dye any white animal you like pink unless it can’t get wet like rabbit chinchilla etc just dab someone on and magic pink pet just be smart about it and have water and radishes) i’m poor as fuck i’ll do it with kitchen scissors like i do my own hair lol (also my big sis cuts it with a knife sometimes and it makes it a cool texture that styles really well but i wouldn’t use a knife on a dog cuz they move around a lot i don’t trust that bitch to stay still i’m not even allowed 2 use them on myself much less a wigglebeast LOL) like if i ever got a poodle they would have to classify her a traffic hazard. neon green collar ultramarine leash dog sunglasses if she likes them. it would be sick. you guys just aren’t Enlightened like me and you let rich people ruin things for you. they can’t steal CustomDog from me. people are gonna be like “what the fuck is that” when i walk around with my awful triangle dog and i’m gonna love it. this was just me complaining about a cool idea getting passed up and now i kinda want a poodle 🤔🤔🤔

[golbrocklovely]

never needed // colby brock

A/N: so fun fact about this fic is that i came up with it last year back in november. it was around the time me and my ex best friend stopped being friends. i was really in such a rough headspace, and i think the concept shows it. i just finished writing it today and wow... i still feel this way to some extent, but not fully (thank god). also i literally cried while writing it today so there’s that. hope yall enjoy this one. i'm trying to post a bunch of fics since this coming week is my bday (the 14th). no guarantees, but i'm trying my best to put out at least six things. let me know what you think of this one. see yall later :)

prompt: colby has been ghosting you for a while, just when things were starting to get good between you two. after a week of ignoring you, he’s finally ready to talk. || fem!reader x colby brock

trigger warning: angst, cursing, heartache, crying, honestly this one is really sad so sorry about that, happy ending tho

word count: 2331

~~~~~~~

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I groaned to myself, staring at my phone.

Colby was still ignoring me, something I had grown accustomed to this week. He had ghosted my calls and my texts. He turned his read notifications off too, so I had no clue whether or not he had even seen my messages at all.

Everything had been going great between us. We had met a couple years back and hit it off as friends right away. I always thought he was attractive, and our friendship was always really flirty; so much so that fans thought we were together. And then finally, something clicked a couple months back. I wasn't sure if it was the accidental drunken kiss we shared, or just a built up of feelings, but we finally decided that maybe we should test out an actual relationship.

We promised each other we would take it slow, both of us still heartbroken from our previous relationships and our general trust issues. But these past two months, we went into overdrive, actually taking the time to feel each other out as boyfriend and girlfriend.

And for the first time, I felt happy. Genuinely happy.

A week ago, we had even gone on a cute little date, something we had started doing regularly. We were in the middle of our conversation; I remember I laughed hard at something he said. It was loud enough that some of the patrons in the restaurant stared at us. And when he tried to shush me jokingly, a silence had fallen over us.

His face dropped suddenly, he became super serious and quiet, and then he asked if we could go home.

He told me the next day that he thought he got food poisoning and it just hit him in the restaurant. I didn't think anything of it and was fine with going home early.

But now, I wonder if he was lying.

I looked back down at my phone, reading over my messages from the past week to him.

Was I taking this too far? He could have just been busy. I don't wanna come across as clingy.

"Ugh, fuck that." I muttered out loud to myself, rolling out of my bed to get a drink.

I didn't care if I came across as clingy. I had a right to know why he was ignoring me. If it was work related, he would have told me. He had done that in the past before.

This was different, I just knew it.

Tomorrow, I planned to go over and see him. I would have done it tonight, but I knew he wasn't home. He was out with some friends at Saddle Ranch. Like a fan, I had to watch his stories on Insta, since that was the only way I knew where he was.

"Don't expect too much from him." Sam said.

I shook my head at that memory. When we got together, everyone was happy for us. But I could feel a certain tension in the room, a certain caveat that wasn't being mentioned. Later that night, Sam and I were by ourselves, and he asked me if Colby and I had really made our relationship official. I told him we hadn't gone all the way, but that we were taking it one step at a time.

"I'm happy for you guys, really. I just wonder..." His voice trailed off.

I cocked my head. "Wonder what?"

"Look, I love you both, but I don't know if Colby is really ready for a relationship. There's a lot of things he still needs to work through." He stated.

"We're not that serious." I laughed.

"Yeah, yet. If you plan to be, I just don't want you to get your heart broken because he wasn't ready." Sam admitted.

I patted his shoulder lightly, smiling. "Relax, Samuel. Everything will be fine."

"Alright. Just... don't expect too much from him, okay?" He mentioned, his eyes narrowing on mine.

That had been two months ago and... I think I should have heeded his warning.

A loud knock at my front door brought me out of my thoughts, scaring me. I grabbed a knife from my kitchen, striding over to the door. I glance through the peephole to see who was there.

Colby's face stared back.

"Y/N, it's me. Can you open the door?" He called.

I scowled at him through the peephole. "Sorry she's not home right now. Maybe you should try responding to her texts.”

“Look I'm sorry, but that's why I came over. I wanted to talk in person.” He replied.

“Damn, that’s a shame. Too bad she’s not home!” I exclaimed angrily.

“C’mon now, don’t be childish.” He remarked.

I swung the door open, holding back from yelling into my hallway. “Childish?!”

He smirked at me. “I knew that would get you to open the door.”

“You’re not funny.” I deadpanned, glaring at him.

“Can you please let me in? I seriously want to talk.” Colby responded, his eyes landing on mine.

“No, Colby. It’s one o’clock in the morning, I don’t feel like talking, and you’re drunk.” I jeered, resting my hands on my hips.

He scrunched up his face dramatically. “No, I’m not. I only had like two drinks.”

“Oh my mistake. I figured a person that randomly comes over to talk at the ass-crack of night is usually drunk,” I quipped. “Don’t you have better things to do, like be at Saddle Ranch?”

He stepped back, raising an eyebrow. “How’d you know I was at Saddle Ranch?”

I could feel my cheeks heat up. “Because… I watched your stories.”

“Nice to know you pay attention to me,” he uttered under his breath. “Please let me in.”

“No. Fuck off, Colby.” I hissed.

He rolled his eyes at my comment. “If you don’t let me in, I’m just gonna make noise out here in the hallway until you do.”

“Bet.” I huffed.

“What was your favorite movie again… ‘10 Things I Hate About You’?” He questioned, stepping back further into the hallway.

I blinked. “Yeah, so what?”

He looked up at me, giving me a devilish smile. “…You’re just too good to be true.”

My face dropped at his voice. “Colby.”

“Can’t take my eyes off of you.” He sang, pointing at me.

“Are you really-” I started.

He cut me off, running his hands down his body. “You’d be like heaven to touch.”

I hushed. “Seriously stop-”

“I wanna hold you so much.” He closed his eyes, wrapping his arms around himself.

I grunted, smacking my hand towards him. “Colby, it’s one in the morn-”

“At long last, love has arrived.” He opened his arms wide.

“Shut the fuck up!” I whisper-shouted.

“And I thank God I'm alive.” Colby praised up towards the ceiling.

I retorted. “You’re fucking embarrass-”

He spun in a circle slowly. “You're just too good to be true.”

“I knew giving you the code to my apartment was a bad idea.” I grumbled.

“Can't take my eyes off of you.” He winked, pointing at me again.

Colby took a big inhale, ready to start singing the music, but I grabbed his arm and pulled him into my apartment.

I slammed my door shut, locking it quickly. “Next time you do something like that, I’m gonna kill you.”

“That’s not very- why do you have a knife?” He motioned toward the knife sitting on my side table.

“What-? Oh, I thought you were an intruder.” I explained.

He lightly smiled, his dimples appearing. “You think an intruder would knock?”

I snapped, annoyed. “Aren’t you here to apologize?”

“Right, right,” he cleared his throat, his demeanor changing. “Y/N, I’m deeply sorry.”

“Sure.” I narrowed my eyes, walking towards my kitchen.

He followed me. “I know what I did was fucked up. I should have responded to you.”

“You completely ignored me for over a week.” I informed him, resting my back against the counter.

He nodded. “I know. I shouldn’t have done that.”

I crossed my arms uncomfortably. “…were you busy?”

“No, not really.” He divulged, dropping his head.

“So, you purposefully ignored my calls and text…” I could feel my hands shake against my arms.

“You make it sound bad-” He mumbled.

“It is that bad.” I emphasized, stopping him. “Colby, you wanna talk about being childish? That shit was childish.”

He agreed. “I know it was.”

“Obviously not since you keep joking about it.” I argued.

“I’m not trying to joke,” he protested, running his hands through his hair. “Do you wanna know the honest to God truth?”

“Of course I do.” I answered, furrowing my eyebrows.

He exhaled, glancing at me. “When we first got together, even though we were taking it slow, I was terrified to date you.”

“Terrified?” I puzzled.

He swallowed hard. “Yes. Scared shitless.”

“Why?” I questioned.

“I thought it was because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. But then… at dinner,” his voice lowered, his shoulders dropping. “I realized it was more than that.”

I shook my head, confused. “What are you ta-”

“I’m falling in love with you, Y/N.” He confessed.

His words made me step back, my breath hitching in my throat.

I choked. “What?”

“When you laughed really hard, and did that cute snort thing you do, I remember we looked at each other… and all I saw was you,” his eyes bore into mine, causing goosebumps to rise all over my skin. “No one else in that restaurant existed. And in that moment, I wanted to tell you I love you.”

I stammered out words, unable to think clearly. “S-so… you-”

“When I felt it, I knew I had to go home. Because I was just so shocked at the feeling. I haven’t felt that way for anyone in a long time.” He sighed exhaustingly, “and… I apologize that I ignored you. Every time I saw your messages, I knew I should have responded. But my body, my mind, wouldn’t let me.”

I frowned. “Because you love me?”

“Because… I’m scared to love you.” He admitted.

A heavy silence fell over the apartment. I shuddered out an exhale, not even noticing I had been holding my breath in for so long. Colby closed his eyes, twisting up his face, and turned his back to me.

“Why are you scared to love me?” I gulped, scared of his answer.

His shoulders tensed as he gripped the counter. “The last time you felt heartbroken… did it leave you feeling empty? Because that’s how I felt… for so long. It’s not even the empty feeling that bothered me. It was the fact that I knew something used to be there… and now it’s gone. I miss who I was before.”

I opened my mouth, but no words escaped.

“I have this deep, guttural feeling that you’re gonna realize I’m not worth loving, and that there is someone else out there that is, and you’re gonna leave me.” His voice trembled as he spoke, “everyone… always leaves me.”

I gasped quietly. “Colby-”

He turned back to me, his face becoming red. “I just feel like no one ever needs me, you know? Like some people only keep me around because they don’t have the heart to just tell me they don’t care anymore. Even Sam has someone else.

I consoled. “That’s not-”

“And I know it’s selfish to want everyone around me to only want me. I don’t really feel that way. I just… don’t feel like anyone really needs me as much as I need them,” his chest quaked as his breathing began to speed up. “And when you realize it too… I don’t think I can live through that fall out again. I don’t think I’m gonna survive it.”

“Wait, Col-” I murmured.

“At that dinner, I had this gut-wrenching anxiety come over me; a voice in my head that said ‘she’s gonna leave you too’ and… I’m just so sorry.” He panted, his eyes welling up.

I wrapped my arms around him tightly, pressing his body into mine as hard as I could. He buried his face into my neck, his body almost going limp against mine.

I couldn’t help my own tears spill as they landed on his shirt. “Baby, why didn’t you tell me you were feeling this way before?”

“I was ashamed. I should be stronger than this.” He fumed through his tears.

I rubbed his face lovingly. “Who said that? You are strong. Expressing your emotions is strong.”

He nodded, croaking. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. Can you forgive me?”

“Of course. How about tonight you stay over, and then in the morning, we’ll talk about this more? Okay?” I suggested, resting my hands on his forearms.

“Yeah.” He whimpered.

I smiled brokenly. “Come on, let’s go to bed.”

I lightly grasped Colby’s hand, pulling him slowly into my bedroom. He stumbled along, his head remaining down.

I sat him down on the bed and slid off his jacket, placing it on my dresser. I cupped his face, tracing his jaw with my fingers. His eyes finally landed on mine as I tilted his head up.

I leaned down and kissed his lips, resting my forehead against his.

“I’m not gonna leave you, Colby.” I stated, gazing into his eyes.

He begged in a hushed tone. “Please don’t.”

“I won’t. I promise.” I reassured, kissing his forehead.

I walked over to the other side of my bed and laid down. Colby kicked off his shoes, taking his belt off and pulling his jeans down. After getting undressed, he slid into bed with me, laying his head down softly on my chest. Wrapping his arms around me, he buried his head into my neck again, sighing against my skin. I ran my fingers through his hair, a light hum falling from his lips. I ran my other hand up and down his spine, feeling him shiver under my touch.

“We’ll be okay, Colby.” I whispered.

[dreamwritesimagines]

Burn The Witch 23 - Haunted Heart [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s the next chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, lovers to enemies, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.

Summary: Coming home can cause issues.

Series Masterlist

                          SIX MONTHS LATER

You flipped the knife in your hand as the guy tied to the chair glared at you.

“You know,” you trailed off, “I’ve had a really shitty couple of months, Johnny- can I call you Johnny?”

“No.”

“Rude,” you commented, “Fine. John. I’ve had a really shitty couple of months so you really don’t want to try me right now. Just tell me where I can find your boss.”

“You’ll never find him you stupid bitch.”

You rolled your eyes.

“Since I’m going to kill you in a couple of minutes I feel like I can share some things with you,” you said, “My best friend says I keep everything bottled and I should talk about my feelings.”

“Go fuck yourself.”

“See, that’s exactly how I feel!” you pointed at him, “Thank you. I mean, I feel angry at myself. I kind of fucked up with the man I love.”

“Jesus Christ, just kill me already.”

“I’m waiting for a text to do that Johnny,” you pointed out, waving your phone at him. “So, I tricked him and used him and threw him to wolves. And then Accords 2.0 didn’t pass and he has been pardoned once again, and he’s a free man now. I have a strong feeling that he’s not the ‘forgive and forget’ type of guy. You know, assassin to assassin.”

“You’re the chattiest assassin I’ve ever met.”

“Thank you, I’m trying to improve myself,” you said, “I mean what exactly should I do? I don’t even trust my agency at this point, my handler lied to me and I have been at this fucking place for six months now, hunting you down. Well, your boss but…”

“You’ll never find him.”

“We’ll see about that my friend,” you said, “So anyway, like what am I supposed to do? I lost the one guy I actually loved. How do you cope with that? Because drinking doesn’t work, sleeping with others doesn’t work…. Nothing seems to—“ you were cut off when your phone vibrated and you touched the screen to open the text message.

From: Julian

Go for it.

“Wait, no no no, I’ll talk—“

“Kind of too late,” you pointed the gun at him, “Nice to meet you Johnny.”

With that you pulled the trigger, silencer doing its job as there was no loud bang or anything. His body fell back with the impact, and you heaved a sigh.

“Maybe I need a therapist I can’t kill,” you mumbled and walked out of the warehouse to approach the car before opening the door to the passenger seat to get in.

“Is it done?” Julian asked and you nodded, rubbing at your eyes.

“Yep.”

“Are you hungry?”

You made a face, “Just because the General sent you here does not mean we’re going to become buddies.”

“I’m not trying to become buddies with you,” Julian stated, “I just want to eat fries and there’s a two for one deal.”

You eyed him up and down.

“Fine, I could eat fries.” You leaned back in the seat as he started driving, keeping your eyes on the road. Soon enough, you reached the city center and Julian got fries from a food truck, then sat across from you.

“So,” he said, “You do realize this whole thing would’ve been over by now if we actually worked together?”

“I’m not going on the field with you.”

“The General sent me here to help you.”

You dipped the fry into sauce, then popped it into your mouth, “You can help me by pretending you’re not here.”

“Y/N.”

“You know what they say Julian. Fool me once…”

“Don’t tell me you’re still holding that grudge.”

“You mean when you left me behind to die on the last mission we were together?” you asked back, “That grudge?”

“I told you—“

“I’m not going to talk about that with you,” you cut him off, “And I work better alone. Who told you we could waste the guy by the way?”

“The General.”

You grabbed the salt shaker to pour some salt on the fries, causing Julian to make a face.

“Are you kidding me? That was salty enough-“

“Why did he not text me?”

“No idea. Maybe he’s avoiding you because he promised you handler and here you are. Field spy.”

Your jaw clenched.

Or maybe he’s avoiding me because he fucking lied to me.

You had to give it to him, it was the perfect plan. The moment he had suspected you were getting too close to Bucky, he had come up with the one thing he knew that would make you switch sides.

And that-

That was below the belt yes, but that was also masterly.

But at the end of the day, you barely had two people to trust in the entire world, and you seriously doubted you could ever forgive the General for what he had done. You knew he held duty above all, above family and surely above you, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

You shook your head at yourself and grabbed another piece of fry.

“So um…” Julian shifted his weight, “Are you okay?”

You shot him a glare, arching a brow, “Peachy.”

“No I mean… About Barnes.”

“What are you talking about?”

“This whole Accords 2.0 failure, there’s no way we could go after him again.”

“I don’t want to go after him again.”

“You don’t want revenge?”

That made you straighten up your back and you put the fry down, “And why exactly would I want revenge?”

That made Julian fall silent and you nibbled on your lip.

“What exactly did the General tell you before you came here?”

“That there was a job here.”

“Bullshit,” you replied way too quickly, “Did he send you here to be my babysitter? He thinks I’ll go after Barnes myself is that it? That’s why they sent you here months after I left the country but right after Accords 2.0 didn’t pass.”

Julian licked his lips.

“Listen, the agency wants to keep you safe—“ he started but then his phone beeped. He grabbed it to take aa look at the screen, then cussed under his breath.

“What?”

“Check your texts.”

You touched the screen and frowned as your eyes skimmed the text.

From: General

Time to come home.

“Well,” you muttered, your heart dropping to your stomach, “Shit.”

                                                   ***

Coming back home was harder than ever now. After catching up with Keith and Chloe, you were taken to your new apartment that was given to you by the agency as usual, and for the whole night you couldn’t sleep.

Even if there was no trace of Bucky in your new apartment –in your new life, you still couldn’t shake off this feeling. It was as if the moment you had entered the country, Bucky had entered your life in an instant.

Odds were, you wouldn’t really see him again. After all it was a big city, and Bucky wasn’t exactly the social type.

So your first week back in New York wasn’t exactly terrible. You were still waiting for your orders while getting to know to the city slowly, because after long missions it always took time for you to remember you had a real life there, real memories—

Well, as real as it could be, for a spy.

“Just see it as a vacation,” Chloe had said, “They threw you into another mission as soon as you got out of the country, it’s just a delayed vacation.”

As far as vacations went though, this one just sucked.

Maybe it was because you couldn’t keep away from places you and Bucky had been too, like this coffee place where you had first officially met.

You sipped your coffee, scrolling down on the news website as your eyes skimmed yet another article about Accords and whether you could trust superheroes or not, but you were soon distracted when someone pulled the seat across from you, making you look up from your phone.

And as soon as you did, your heart dropped.

You had to give it to the General, he was manipulative, he was a liar and he had betrayed your trust terribly but the one thing he had done right was training you well. Aside from that one second, you managed to adapt a look of nonchalance on your face, slowly putting your phone down.

“Hello Cap.”

Sam raised his brows and eyed you up and down.

“You’re back?”

You could swear he could hear your heartbeat and you shrugged your shoulders, looking around.

“Yeah,” you said, “Big apple and everything.”

“So much for the small town girl.”

“I have never been a small town girl,” you drawled, “Never been to Oregon either.”

“Yeah, I can tell.”

You turned your coffee cup on the table just so you could do something with your hands.

“Why?” he asked after a beat and you shifted your weight despite your whole training of feeling calm and collected, nervousness hitting you out of nowhere.

“You’re a veteran, Wilson,” you managed to say, “You don’t need me to tell you how the chain of command works. Army doesn’t care how we feel about orders.”

“I’m very familiar with how chain of command works,” he pointed out, “But you’re not a soldier, Y/N. You’re a spy.”

“That makes it even worse,” you stated, “I know it sounds like an excuse, but… you don’t know how my agency works. I don’t get to say no to orders, and I sure as hell don’t get to blow my own cover.”

“But you wanted to, didn’t you?”

Jesus Christ, Wilson was really good at this observation thing.

“Doesn’t matter what I want,” you said, “I’m no use to anyone if I develop a conscience.”

“But you did,” he insisted, “Why else would you come to help us? Why else would you warn him beforehand?”

“He told you about that?”

He shot you a look, “What do you think, Y/N?”

You scoffed a laughter. “I was feeling generous,” you said, “No other reason.”

He kept his gaze on you for a couple of seconds, as if trying to see whether you would cave before he took a deep breath.

“You know he was going to propose, right?”

That-

That was just too much. You could feel your jaw hanging as you stared at him in complete silence, his words echoing in your ears.

“No,” you said after a moment, then shook your head fervently, your nose in the air, “No you’re wrong.”

“I’m not,” Sam said, “Apparently he was looking for this… house painted in white with—a red door or something.”

Don’t cry.

Do not fucking cry.

Spies don’t cry over heartbreak.

You clenched your jaw and blinked back the tears, straightening your back.

“It’s a good thing he didn’t get to, then.”

“Y/N, he loved you.”

“No Sam, he loved someone who doesn’t exist,” you replied, “Sweet small town girl with sundresses and smiles and some house in the suburbs with kids and all that shit. Girls like me don’t get that ending, I have way too much blood on my hands.”

He pressed his lips together and you cleared your throat.

“How much does he hate me?”

“Why do you think he hates you?”

“Assassins aren’t good at forgiving,” you said, “I would know, we don’t have that talent.”

“That’s not a talent, that’s a choice.”

“It really isn’t,” you muttered, “So?”

“Why don’t you ask him?”

You let out a bitter laugh, “Yeah no. Actions have consequences and I’d rather not cross paths with the deadliest assassin in the world after double crossing him.”

“But you want him to forgive you.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Intuition,” he said and pushed his chair back to stand up.

“He didn’t kill your father, Y/N.”

You heaved a sigh.

“I know,” you said, “Trust me, I would’ve walked away so much easier if he had.”

“Enjoy your coffee,” he said and walked out of the coffee house. You threw your head back, closing your eyes.

“Yep. I shouldn’t have come back.”

                                                  ***

“I never thought I’d say this, but I kind of hate that we’re not living so close anymore,” you pressed the phone between your shoulder and your ear and opened the door to your apartment as Keith chuckled.

“I knew you’d miss me.”

“Shut up.”

“You’re a softie deep inside. Very very deep inside.”

“If you repeat that in front of anyone I swear to God…” you muttered and he groaned.

“Have I told you they’re putting me in the same team as Julian?”

“You guys have a new mission?”

“Not a long one probably.”

“Why the fuck am I—“

“Because you’re on a vacation,” he cut you off, “And also they’re probably going to make you a handler, that’s worth waiting for.”

“That or….”

“We’re not talking about that on the phone,” Keith said quickly, “Amateur.”

“Careful there, I’ll outrank you soon enough,” you said, walking to the bathroom to wash your hands. “I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Alright, see you later!” he said and hung up. You put your phone into your pocket, then washed your hands and made your way to the kitchen.

It was only when you put the wine bottle back into the fridge that you noticed something was off. Your body moved on its own accord, before you knew it you had already grabbed the knife in your boots and threw it to the figure in the dark corner of the room but he easily caught it, metal hitting what sounded like another kind of metal before he stepped out of the corner. Your breath caught in your throat, and for the first time in your life you froze, all the training leaving your mind.

You were supposed to be looking for a weapon, any kind of weapon but somehow, your body refused to move.

Bucky turned your knife in his hands, his gaze pinning you to your spot before he tilted his head.

“Hi honey,” he said, his voice way too cold. “I’m home.”

Chapter 24

[arizona2004]

The Fight

Azriel x reader

Warnings: mentions of sex(no actual smut)

Word count: 2931

Note: I used the pronouns “me/I” instead of “you” but it’s not an Original character still y/n

Looking at the lacey, black fabric hanging on the rack it was impossible not to remember the time I had worn a similar contraption -that showed even more skin- for my mate. It was impossible not to remember the way Azriel’s eyes were blown wide when he saw me or the way his hands felt on my skin, giving me his undivided attention. I was so lost in the memory of Azriel’s lips and teeth grazing my skin I didn’t even notice Mor come up behind me.

“The dress is beautiful, and all y/n, but you look like you want to fuck it. Calm down, girly.”

My cheeks immediately reddened at the comment, but I ignored that and said anyways, “Do you think Az will like it?”

“Oh, Azriel is who you’re thinking about. I should have assumed it wasn’t me given he’s your mate and all, but a girl can still dream,” she responded with a wink and a smirk, making me blush even redder, reminding me of another night before I even knew my mate. It was one drunken incident centuries ago that Mor and I hardly ever spoke about, but it was one of the best nights of my life, excluding every night spent with my mate, of course. “I’m sure he’ll love it, but he’d also love you if you were dressed in a trash bag,” Mor continued.

“I’m gonna have to disagree with you there. He’s barely touched me in the last week. I need something that’ll get his attention.”

“Then wear nothing,” she replied with a smirk.

“I’m not going naked to Rita’s tonight, Mor.”

“Oh, but he’d be certain to take you home immediately.”

I rolled my eyes and took the dress off the rack and to the counter to pay. “Are we all going out to eat beforehand or to Rhys and Feyre’s?” I asked.

“Probably out, but it doesn’t matter because Rhys is paying either way,” she responded with a grin.

Rolling my eyes at her, again I finished paying, and we headed for the door.

…………….

I haven’t seen Az all day, he had left bed before I woke, and yesterday I hadn’t seen him until he had finally turned in for the night. I’ve been more stressed than usual, even with work being slow. With Azriel and I barely talking or touching, I’ve been incredibly tense. I know Mor would only shut down the thought if I voiced it to her, but I can’t help but wonder if Az is getting bored of me or if he realized he doesn’t love me anymore. I’m probably just being paranoid. 

I climb into the tub scented with vanilla -Azriel’s favorite- and began washing my hair.

…………….

As I was just finishing up washing and was about to get out and dry off I heard Azriel walk into the bedroom. He knocked at the bathroom door, “y/n?”

“Yeah, come in,” I answered.

His eyes met mine, he looked tired, and I immediately grew concerned, but before I could say anything, he spoke, “Are you gonna be ready in 45? That’s when we need to meet up with everyone,” he said, never straying his eyes from mine.

“Yeah,” I responded, and he left. He didn’t even look at me, not even a peak. He always peaked a glance when I was naked. Tears welled up in my eyes, and I covered my mouth to stifle my crying. I sat there for a few additional minutes pulling myself together and panicking over my mate.

When I finally pulled myself from the tub, I cleaned up my face, applying makeup to cover any signs I had been crying, and dried my hair, pinning half of it back. Hanging up my towel, I walked into the bedroom naked, Az quickly looked away when he realized, and it was like a knife to my heart. I continued on my path toward the closet to retrieve my dress. As Azriel finished lacing up his boots, he walked out the door and headed downstairs. I stared after him and decided that if he was gonna act like this, then I was gonna be worse.

After slipping into the tight lace dress that had an underlayer that only covering my privates and left the rest of my skin open wherever the lace didn’t cover it, I strapped on some black heels and painted my lips red. I knew Az was standing in the foyer, and I could feel his eyes on me as I descended the stairs, but I refused to look his way. He was angry, and I could feel it, “You’re not leaving the house dressed like that,” he said behind me as I walked toward the door, hips swaying. With my hand on the handle, I glanced back and said, “oh, yes, I am,” before opening the door and swinging it shut in his face. I quickly walked down the steps with a grin plastered across my face and joined everyone waiting for us in the street.

“I just knew you’d look incredible in that dress,” Mor commented, “but I still think you should have come naked.”

I smirked at her and was about to respond, but Azriel had appeared behind me and grabbed my elbow. “Go inside and change. I’ll wait,” he growled in my ear. 

“No,” I said pulling my arm from him.

“No?” 

“I like this dress, and I want to wear it out tonight,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest, pushing my breasts up, showing them even more in the low cut of the dress.

His eyes darkened, and I could feel the anger rolling off of him as he said, “Your ass is practically hanging out the back of it, and the lace barely covers anything.”

“It covers enough,” I said, head still raised high, as I turned from him and towards the others, “So where are we going to eat?” I asked with an innocent smile. Azriel was still staring at my back seething, and everyone else was looking between us, a little hesitant and concerned, but Mor just named a place and put her arm in mine, walking us away.

Everyone soon followed after, and I could feel Azriel’s stare against my back, but I ignored it as Mor and I laughed together. I was perfectly happy being silently angry until Mor said, “Are you and Az, okay?”

I had to will myself not to cry. I took a deep breath, I’m not going to be sad because my relationship might be falling apart, I’m just going to be angry and get my revenge. “Of course. Why wouldn’t we be okay?” I responded with a fake smile.

“Well, he’s definitely mad, and I’m starting to think this dress overdid it with trying to get his attention,” she whispered.

“You don’t think I should have worn the dress?” I asked.

“Oh, no, I think you should wear it. Just maybe not to intentionally piss him off. Or maybe in a larger size, because your ass really is about to be on full display,” she said with a glance at my rear.

A growl immediately erupted from Azriel, and he glared at Mor. She tensed slightly, and I quickly glared back at Azriel and let a warning growl of my own loose as I pulled her closer to me by her hip.

As we arrived at the restaurant, a waiter took us to our reserved table in the back, and I sat with Mor at my left and pulled Cassian into the chair on my right. I could feel Azriel’s anger spark at that as he took a seat across from me, and I leaned into Cassian to whisper about something Mor and I had been discussing. He laughed at my comment but quickly stopped and looked away from me. Looking up, I realized Azriel was glaring at him. “Stop it,” I whispered across the table at him.

“Stop what?” he asked curtly, turning his glare to me.

“Glaring and growling,” I said.

“I’m not,” he said, then turned his head away, ignoring me.

The rest of dinner was tense. Azriel continued glaring or growling at anyone that looked my way a moment too long. And I avoided his looks, continuing my conversation with Mor and Cassian, occasionally adding a hand to their thighs or shoulders just to piss Azriel off a little more. Cassian wasn’t too happy about it, probably fearing for his life, but Mor happily flirted back after she drank a little wine. 

We all got up and headed for Rita’s after dinner. The walk was short, and I stayed next to Mor and Cassian the whole time, mostly to protect them from any threats Az might send their way if I wasn’t there. When we got into the club, Amren parted from the group -probably to go to the Summer court rather than spend the night with us- and Rhys went to the bar to order some drinks. The rest of us headed for our designated booth, and as Azriel and Feyre sat down, I pulled Cassian and Mor to the dance floor. 

Cassian quickly slipped away from me, dancing with some female I’d never seen before, but Mor kept her hands on my hips and danced with me. I glanced to Azriel, finding him downing a shot while Feyre and Rhys looked on worriedly. Rhys whispered something to him, but nothing was gonna help the mood I put him in.

 After a while, Mor and I went back to the table to drink. Mor went back to the dancing before I did, so I sparked a conversation with Rhys and Feyre, avoiding Azriel’s eyes. As I stood to start dancing again, I realized that I should have had fewer drinks. Dancing was gonna be difficult. When I arrived at the edge of the dance floor, I looked over my shoulder at Azriel. He was studiously ignoring me. Of course, he isn’t going to come dance with me, I thought to myself. So I started swaying my hips by myself, wishing his hands were on them. I kept on like that, dancing where I knew Az could see me. If he was looking. Eventually, a pair of hands did find their way to my hips, but the first thing I noticed was that they weren’t Azriel’s. Well, at least someone wants to dance with me, I thought, so I let him pull me closer. 

After a minute, I turned my head toward the booth, but Azriel was no longer there. I was about to pull away from the male to look for Az when I felt his lips kiss my neck. Okay, that was too far, and I was about to say as much when I pulled away, but before I got the chance, he was ripped away. I spun around to see Azriel holding the male by his throat and growling something I couldn’t hear in his ear. 

“Az, stop it,” I protested,  but he didn’t even look my way.

Rhys showed up a moment later and was saying something to Azriel, but my head went fuzzy. My ears were ringing, and everything looked blurry. I tried stepping forward and reaching out for Azriel, “Az…” but instead, everything went black. Right before I hit the floor, I felt hands catch me. Azriel.

It was only a few moments later when I woke up sitting in the booth, and Feyre was placing a glass of water in front of me. I quickly drank half of it and set it down before resting my head on Azriel’s shoulder. But then he pulled away, and my anger from before rose back up again.

“I cannot believe you’re angry with me,” I growled at him.

“You can’t believe I’m angry. Of course, I am. That man kissed you and was dancing with you,” he growled back, eyes blazing.

“I didn’t ask him to kiss me, and he wouldn’t have been dancing with me if you had been.” 

“Maybe he wouldn’t have been dancing with you if you weren’t dressed like that,” he snapped back.

“What the hell’s that supposed to mean? I’m only attractive when I show some skin?”

“Of course not,” he practically yelled back. “But if you weren’t dressed as though you’re just wanting every male to wonder what the hell’s under that lace, then they wouldn’t try to touch you.”

“They also wouldn’t try anything if they had any idea I have a mate. Why do you think I’m dressed like this, Az?” he furrowed his brow and opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, I said, “You’ve barely spoken to or touched me all week,  and we haven’t had sex in almost two weeks. The only male I wanted attention from was you,” I said, standing up and walking toward the door.

Once I was outside, I started walking home. I could’ve just winnowed but, I was hoping Az would come after me. Please, please, please. Run after me. Just like in the storybooks. Please! I practically shouted down the bond, but he didn’t come, so I winnowed to the foyer of our house and cried until I couldn’t anymore. 

Eventually, I picked myself up and went upstairs. I ripped the dress off, never wanting to see it again, before wrapping myself in a robe and walking into the bathroom. I washed all of the ruined makeup off my face and brushed the lingering taste of alcohol away. Not that it mattered, because minutes later, I was seated by the toilet puking everything up and crying again. Azriel still wasn’t back when I fell asleep on the bathroom floor. But in the morning, I woke up in bed. 

A glass of water was sitting on the bedside table, but Azriel’s side of the bed was still mostly made. He hadn’t slept there. I sat up in bed and was drinking the water when Azriel walked in, “You’re up,” he seemed surprised. I didn’t say anything. My mouth was still dry, and my eyes puffy from crying. “I guess we need to talk,” he said, sitting down at the foot of the bed.

“Are you seeing someone else?” I blurted out before I could stop myself.

He looked at me incredulously, “No! Of course not. Why would you even think that?” 

Relief washed through me, and I just shrugged my shoulders slightly, looking down at my lap. I could feel the tears welling up, but I didn’t want to cry, so I tried to push them back down to no avail.

Azriel pushed closer to me on the bed and lifted my chin, “Hey, look at me. Look at me,” When I finally lifted my head, he looked me in the eyes and said, “I love you. I love you so much, you have to know that,” he pulled me into his lap, and I cried lightly into his shoulder while he kept murmuring those words again and again.

I fell asleep again, and when I woke up, I was curled against Azriel’s left side, his right-wing wrapped around us as he lay on his back. I snuggled closer to him, and when he wrapped his arms tighter around me, I asked, “Why haven’t you been around? I wake up and, you’re gone. I go to bed and, you’re still not here,” I looked up at him, and he looked back, pulling me up and pressing my forehead to his. 

“At first, I was just busy with work. Then it felt like there was some disconnect between us. I didn’t know what to do so, I just pulled away. I realize I should have come to you, but it just feels easier to stay in the shadows.”

“Azriel…”

“I know. It’s stupid, and I’m an idiot.”

I pulled back slightly, opening my eyes, “I was not going to say that. I do wish you would have come to me, it would have made things a lot easier, but the way you feel is not stupid,” He kissed me then. Just his lips pushing against mine. Not too gentle, but not rough either.  We stayed like that for a little while longer, just holding each other tightly.

We finally got up when our stomachs began to grumble and went to the kitchen. It was after 3 pm I sat at the breakfast bar while Az made us a couple of sandwiches. Things were less tense but, we were both still walking on eggshells around one another. I know I’m not mad at him anymore and, I don’t think he’s upset but, things are still a little off. 

We make generic small talk while we eat, but the silences in between aren’t as comfortable as they used to be.  After we finish eating, I pick up our plates and bring them to the sink. Before I realize he’s behind me, Azriel puts his hands on my shoulders and starts massaging. 

“You’re tense,” he says, “what’s wrong?”

“I don’t know. Things aren’t the same,” I frowned and leaned back into him, looking at him over my shoulder. 

He smiled softly and said, “We got into the biggest fight of our relationship. Things aren’t going to be the same. But you still love me, don’t you?”

“Of course I do,” I said, turning around to look at him directly.

He just smiled again and kissed my lips lightly, “I still love you, too, y/n. I’ll love you always.”

“Always,” I repeated with a grin, kissing him harder.

part 2 (smut)

[thighs-of-betrayal-blog]

A Glorious Moment in Sakaar

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Summary: You’ve always disliked Loki, but when you end up stranded with him on an unknown planet, you put your hatred aside in order to work together. Turns out, the only thing you really hate is how much you actually like him. 

Warnings: weapons, violence, enemies to lovers, implied smut

A/N: Had this in my drafts and just decided to post it... I’m definitely in a Loki mood on this fine day haha. 

I hope you all enjoy and as always, feedback is appreciated :)

Loki Masterlist

Out of all the people in the world who you could’ve gotten stranded with on an unknown, trash planet, Loki is the last person you’d wish to accompany you. 

As soon as the two of you get thrown off the Bifrost and land on random dirty roads, he speaks. “Well, this looks rather unpleasant.” 

Rolling your eyes, you don’t bother to respond, instead opting to scan the area around you. Wherever you landed, it’s heavily polluted. 

“I think I’d rather have ended up in Hel,” Loki complains, his hands on his hips as he surveys with you. 

“I wish you had.” 

Loki looks over at you and chuckles. “What? Don’t want to be stranded here with your favorite God?” 

You pretend to frantically look around. “What do you mean? I don’t see Thor anywhere.” 

“Very funny.” 

“I know I am,” you say before smirking at him and walking away. Loki is quick to match your pace. 

“Let’s try to find some type of civilization and figure out an escape plan.” 

Continuing to walk, you head towards a tall skyscraper-like building that you see in the distance. “Already on it.” You point ahead to show Loki. 

Loki scoffs. “No need to point. I noticed it a while ago.” 

“Sure you did.” 

“I did. I’m a God for crying out loud. I sense things long before-”

A knife sits at the base of your throat, stopping you in place. You look over at Loki who’s in the same predicament. 

“Loki?” you ask before you’re pulled back harshly, the knife lightly grazing your skin. Loki growls, lunging towards you. 

“Hurt them and you’ll all suffer merciless deaths by my hand.” 

You gasp at Loki’s protectiveness. Is it possible he cares for you? No, don’t even think about it. You hate this man. Remember?

The man behind Loki laughs at him before looking over at his partner. “I think the Grandmaster would like this one.” 

The person behind you nods. “Let’s take ‘em in.” 

You share one last glance with Loki before a bag is thrown over your head, preventing you from seeing anything else.

---

The bag’s removed from your head and you squint, your eyes adjusting to the harsh overhead lighting. You’re strapped to a chair, seated right next to Loki. 

In front of you is a man. He’s tall in nature, just like Loki, and he’s smiling at the two of you. 

“Where the hell are we?” You ask, struggling against the restraints. 

The unknown man walks up to you before speaking. “Now, there’s no reason to do that. I’m just simply feeling you out before deciding whether to kill you or not.” 

Again, Loki speaks up, surprisingly coming to your defense. “You’ll have to get through me before you even think of touching them.”

The man laughs at this and turns his attention onto Loki. “You must be the one they said I’d like… Seems like they were right. I do like you.” He claps his hands together. “Okay, so here’s the deal. You’re on my planet, Sakaar. I’m what they call the Grandmaster and usually with newcomers, I’d either kill them or throw them into the pits… which I guess is also death, but that’s not the point! The point is I like you two… especially you.” He points at Loki. “So, great news! You’re welcome to stay, I mean once people land here, they never really leave…” He awkwardly smiles at that, not knowing what else to say. 

You look over at Loki, who’s already staring your way. The two of you gaze at each other silently before the Grandmaster once again claps his hands. “Let’s get the cuffs off these two!” 

Once the cuffs are opened, you rub your wrists and stand up. The Grandmaster motions for the two of you to get away. “Go! Go mingle and have some fun!” 

You look around the room and notice a gathering of people a few feet away. They’re all drinking and dancing, seemingly having the time of their lives. 

You grab Loki’s arm and guide him towards the crowd. “C’mon, we gotta find a busy area to talk.” 

Loki pulls his arm from your grasp. “Shouldn’t we find somewhere quiet to talk privately?” 

You roll your eyes. “No, because then someone might hear us.” 

“So instead, we’re to talk in the middle of a gathering?” 

Shaking your head in irritation, you gesture towards the group of people. “They all seem drunk! Sounds like the perfect opportunity to blend in and discuss.” 

Loki sighs. “Very well. I need a drink first.” 

As he walks towards the bar, you once again grab his arm, stopping him in place. “What’re you doing?” 

“I just told you. I’m getting a drink.” 

“We need to be level-headed for this.” 

He scoffs. “Darling, I really think you’ve forgotten that I’m a God. I can’t get drunk.” 

“Yes, you can. I’ve witnessed it multiple times.” 

He shakes his head. “I was just full.” 

“That’s not the point! Just please-” You look towards the dancefloor. “Dance with me.” 

“Pardon me?”

Instead of answering, you grab his hand and drag him over to the other dancers, pulling him flush against you, your back to his chest. You swear you hear Loki gasp as you sway your hips against him. 

“What’re you doing?” His mouth is right next to your ear, his hands moving to grip your waist tightly. Your body heats up with his touch and you want to scream over its betrayal. 

You turn your head slightly to look up at him. “We need to blend in.” 

As he stares down at you, you get lost in his eyes. They’re an exquisite, light blue, pulling you in and making you forget about the situation around you. Erasing those thoughts from your mind, you focus on the plan. “I say we find where their weapons are placed. Steal some and then find a ship to escape back to Asgard on.”

“Your plan sounds impossibly easy.” 

“Maybe it will be.” 

“You know just as well as myself that it won’t be. But, I’ll go along with it. It’s not the worst of plans you’ve thought of and I fear we don’t have many other options.” 

“Gee, thanks.” You spin around in his arms so you’re now facing him, chest to chest. Loki’s staring down at you, his eyes blazing. One of his hands moves to your face, grabbing your chin and tilting your face upwards. He licks his lips, his tongue sliding out to swipe across his bottom lip. You watch and you can’t help but wonder what his mouth would feel like against yours. 

He leans down until his face is only inches from yours and you find yourself panting with a neediness you haven’t felt in a long time. Loki’s staring at your lips, ready to claim them for himself-

You remember where you are and pull away quickly, putting some distance between the two of you. “What’re you doing?” 

Loki grins. “Just blending in, darling. You didn’t seem to mind.” 

Trying to steady your rising heart rate, you take a deep breath. “Let’s just go find their weapons.” 

Loki gestures for you to walk in front of him. “After you.”

---

Finding and stealing weapons turned out to be easier than you thought. Loki managed to grab multiple knives, as well as the same giant gun that you did. 

Now, you’re heading towards the ship’s garage, intending to steal the best one you come across. You’re in an elevator, heading up to the top floor. As the doors are about to open, Loki puts his arm out in front of you. “I hear voices on the other side. Follow my lead.” 

You nod your head. The doors open, revealing two guards with guns. In an instant, Loki has them both on the ground, knives stabbed into their chests. 

He turns to look at you and grins. “Told you they’d come in handy.” 

“You just wanted to show off.” 

“For you? Always.” 

You roll your eyes for what feels like the hundredth time today and follow Loki towards a large, circular ship. “You think they’d have more guards in this area.” 

Loki walks over to a station pressed against the wall, searching for the ship’s key. “You’d think, but let’s not stick around to find out.” Once he locates the key, he picks it up. “Ah, got it!” 

The elevator opens back up, revealing ten new guards. 

“Uh, Loki?” 

Loki turns just in time to see five guards running full speed at him. He laughs before throwing the gun to the floor, placing the ship key in his pants, and pulling out two knives. “Well, hello. This is going to be fun.” 

Across the room, you’re shooting at the other five guards, backing up as they move forward. You manage to knock three of them to the ground and drop the gun as the other two come running at you, full speed. 

“Y/N!” Loki yells. 

You turn to see him throwing you a knife and you catch it midair. Turning back to the two guards, you smirk. “Unfortunately for you two, I’m rather skilled with knives.” 

“Not as skilled as myself though, just to be clear!” 

You chuckle at Loki’s comment. “That’s what he tells himself to sleep better at night.” 

Right after you say those words, you’re lunging at the guards, slicing your knife into one of their thighs. They hiss out in pain and you use the opportunity to grab them, placing your knife at the base of their neck. The other guard rushes you and you kick out, hitting them square in the stomach before dragging your knife across the captured guard’s neck, causing him to fall to the floor. You fall down and roll over, jumping back onto your feet before the other guard can tackle you. 

Maneuvering around the guard, you swipe your leg out, tripping him up, causing him to fall to the floor. You roll onto the floor behind him and wrap your thighs around his neck, effectively cutting off his air supply. Once he’s knocked out, you get back up, wiping sweat off the top of your eyebrow. Loki is staring at you, an impressed look on his face. You stare back at him, admiring how he looks. He’s leaning against the ship, his hair disheveled with his arms crossed over his chest. The guards he fought are scattered across the floor, each one either dead or knocked out. 

He walks up to you, his tall frame towering over you. “It was rather hot to see you beat up those guards.” His hand reaches down towards your face, his thumb wiping a few spots of blood off your cheek. 

You close your eyes, trying to get a hold of yourself. When you reopen them, Loki is back over towards the ship, looking at you. “Ready, darling?” 

Letting out a shaky breath, you will your legs to follow him onto the ship.

---

A gentle shake to your shoulder wakes you up. Slowly opening your eyes, you come face to face with Loki, who’s looking down at you with a small smile on his face, his hand still resting on your shoulder. You stare at his hand and he pulls it away before clearing his throat. 

“We’re almost back at Asgard.” 

You nod. “How long was I out?” 

“Two hours? I didn’t want to interrupt since it was the first time you looked peaceful in years.” 

Getting up, you glare at him. “Has anyone ever told you how charming you are?” 

“As a matter of fact, yes. Quite a few.” 

“I’m shocked.” You walk to the front of the ship, taking a seat in the pilot’s chair. “This thing on autodrive?” 

Loki moves to take a seat next to you. “No, I figured I’d let it go so we can crash into the nearest crater and die. Put you out of your misery.” 

“Out of my misery?” 

“Yes, since you so clearly hate being around me.” 

Sighing, you turn the chair so you’re facing him. “Who said I hated you?”

Loki mimics you. “Nobody. I can just tell.” 

“I don’t hate you.” Well, maybe a little. But, not for the reason he thought.

He raises an eyebrow. “No?” He sighs, rubbing a hand down his face. “It’s fine if you do. Most individuals I’ve encountered end up hating me.” 

“Well, I’m not like most individuals.” 

He smiles at that. “No, you’re most certainly not.” 

Nervous, you start picking at the arm of the chair. It’s Loki, for crying out loud. The man you can’t stand. So, why is he making you feel this way?

“You almost kissed me in Sakaar. Why?”

The question leaves your mouth before you can even think about the consequences. However, Loki doesn’t seem to mind. Instead, he seems excited by the question, his eyes lit up in amusement. 

“I told you. We needed to blend in.” 

“We were already blending in by dancing. No one was even sparing us a second glance.” 

“No? Well, maybe I just wanted to kiss you then. For my own pleasure.” 

His confession spills over you like a bucket of ice water. Your body is both hot and cold, feeling too much at once. 

Your mouth slightly opens as you gasp quietly. “Don’t say things you don’t mean.” 

All of a sudden, Loki’s moves closer to you. Too close. You can feel his breath wash over your face as his hand slowly crawls up your arm. “I may lie quite frequently, but when it comes to you, I only tell the truth.” 

With a surge of confidence, you grip the front of his leathered shirt. “Prove it to me then.” 

He growls before smashing his mouth onto yours. His lips are everything you’ve ever imagined. Soft and unmistakingly yours. 

“You’re mine now, darling. All mine,” he whispers into the kiss. Grabbing your waist, he pulls you onto his lap, your legs dangling off the sides of the chair. “Say it. Say you’re mine.” 

“I’m yours,” you manage to say, moaning when he bites down on your lower lip. 

After one more kiss, he rests his forehead against yours. “You and I, darling, have a lot of catching up to do when we get back.” He runs his fingers over your thigh. “The things I’m going to do to you. You better prepare yourself.” 

Gulping, you shiver at his promise. This ship couldn’t get you to Asgard fast enough. You’ll let him ruin you, from the inside-out. But, only him. Only Loki. You grin at the thought before leaning in to kiss him again.

[marvelous-harry]

heyy ur doing blurb night and maybe my thingy got flooded or sun but i really want a blurb on h/flo/y/n joining flo in a live stream maybe cooking with flo?

+ Another Flossie x Harry x reader... r wants to help cooking and cuts herself with a knife? Little angst/fluff because r can't handle blood...

Cooking With Flo Harry/Florence/Reader Words: 2.5K Warnings: Mentions of blood, passing out. Summary: You join Florence for a 'Cooking with Flo' livestream... It ends in tears, blood, and lots of cuddles.

"I'm so excited! I haven't joined you on a Cooking with Flo in forever!" I grinned as I jumped up and took a seat on the counter.

Florence unpacked the groceries, putting away all the things we didn't need. "Should be fun. Been a while since I've done a live too," she smiled as she doubled checked she had everything. "Could you go remind Harry we will be going live in a bit so if he could keep the volume down that would be great,"

"Sure," I replied and jumped down off the counter. Walking up the stairs, I knocked on his office door and waited for his reply.

"Yeah?" he called out.

Opening the door, I skipped over to him. "We just wanted to remind you that we will be going live on Instagram in a few minutes so please don't shout anything inappropriate but if you wanted to take off your shirt and walk around in the background it would greatly improve our numbers of viewers," I grinned.

Harry chuckled and pulled me onto his lap, tickling my sides. "You're very cheeky you know that?" he said as he looked at me.

"I don't even know what that means," I replied innocently, grasping his hands tightly to stop him from tickling me more.

"Sure you don't. Alright, I'll be quiet but I will keep my shirt on, thank you very much," Harry smiled as he pressed a kiss to my cheek.

I sighed. "Shame," I told him before getting up. "You're free to join us if you want," I added, giving him a kiss on the lips.

"Thank you, baby," he smiled back. "You can leave the door open,"

Going back downstairs, I rolled up the sleeves on my hoodie and clapped my hands together as I stepped into the kitchen. "Let's cook some shit!"

Florence finished tying on her apron. "Please try and don't swear too much during this," she said as she gestured me over, grabbing another apron off the counter.

"I promise," I chuckled as I walked over and let her put the apron on me before spinning around so she could tie it up in the back.

"Okay, go wash your hands and we'll get started," Florence once again checked she had put everything out as I went to wash my hands.

Drying them on a kitchen towel, I let her know I was ready.

Florence started up the live stream and waved at her phone that was propped up against a bag of flour. "Hello everyone, hi!" she said excitedly as she watched everyone joining.

"So we thought we would do a little cooking with Flo today!" she smiled as she read all the comments. "I of course have my lovely assistant with me,"

I grinned as I leaned into the frame, standing close to her as I waved at the phone. "Hi!"

"Okay, we will be making a dish called creamy pasta primavera. We've had it many times and it's always a hit," Florence explained as she put her hand around my waist.

I nodded. "It's super good. It's healthy but it doesn't taste healthy, you know?" I told them.

"What do you mean doesn't taste healthy? What does healthy taste like?" Florence laughed as she looked at me.

"You know! Healthy taste like kale or a green smoothie or something. Disgusting," I replied with a grimace on my face.

"Oh shush!" she said and bumped me with her hip. "Should we start the actual cooking?" she asked, looking between me and the phone.

“Yeah, that sounds like a good idea,” I replied and put my hands on my hips as I took a step back.

“Since we love this dish so much I will be doubling the recipe so the first thing we’re going to do is get a big pot, fill it up with water, and put it on so it will start boiling,” Florence explained as she pointed to the pot she had already picked out.

Grabbing the pot, I walked over to the sink and started filling it with water.

“For the vegetables, we will be using up some we had lying around from previous meals this week so we have some different coloured bell peppers, a bit of broccoli, half a can of sweet corn, some zucchini, and a few carrots. I’ll probably throw some onion and some garlic in as well cause it’s just so tasty,” Florence said as she picked up the phone and filmed over the vegetables.

“The heavy cream and the parmesan cheese is still in the fridge for now,” she explained as she put the camera back against the flour bag.

“Is this enough water?” I asked as the pot was filled about ¾ of the way.

Florence came over and looked. “Yes, that’s perfect. Thank you, darling,” she smiled.

Grinning back, I picked the heavy pot up and put it on the stove, turning the plate on to the highest setting before grabbing the salt grinder and putting some into the water.

“Wonderful, while that starts heating up we have some chopping to do! I’m just going to get the frying pan out and start heating up some olive oil in it real quick,” Florence said as she turned around.

Walking over to the phone, I smiled as I read some of the comments coming in. “Oh! Deb! Hi Deb!” I waved excitedly at the phone. “Flossie! Your mum is watching!” I told her, glancing back at her before looking back at the phone. “I can’t wait for our lunch! I’m so excited,” I said and waited to see if she would write anything more. “Call me or text me later so we can chat,” I told her as the comments started going by really quickly.

Florence came back over and looked at the comments as well. “Hi mum!” she said and did a little wave. “You can also text or call me but I know she’s your favorite. Can’t blame you, look at her cute face!” she gushed as she pinched my cheek.

“Flossie!” I whined and pulled away.

She just chuckled and turned her attention back to the phone. “Right! Chopping!” Florence said and clapped her hands together. “I’ve got you your own chopping board and knife right next to me,”

Standing in front of it, I grabbed the onion and put it on her board. “I don’t want to chop that. I’ll chop zucchinis,” I said and pulled them into the middle of my chopping board.

“That’s fine,” Florence smiled. “We’re just going to be cutting them into smallish pieces. Not too small cause we want that crunch and flavour to remain quite a bit as we cook it and mix it in with the pasta. Obviously, you can cut them into the size you prefer,”

Cutting the zucchinis into halves, I poked my tongue out as I started cutting them into long lines.

“As with most of my recipes, it’s a dish I learned from my dad. He would usually have some sort of beef meat or sausage with it but I really do like this with just the veggies in it,” Florence told as she made quick work of chopping up the onion and putting it into the frying pan to start sweating them.

As I started cutting the zucchinis into small bites, I glanced up at the phone before taking a sharp breath as I felt a flash of pain. Dropping the knife, I grasped my hurt hand tightly. “Flossie,” I whimpered and stared at the blood that was showing.

Florence whipped her head around and looked at me. “Did you cut yourself?” she asked as she rushed over and looked at my hands.

“Yes,” I whimpered and felt slightly light-headed.

“Okay, look up, take deep breaths. I’m going to put a kitchen towel around your hand,” Florence said calmly as she kept an eye on me while grabbing a clean kitchen towel off the counter and putting it around my hand.

I looked towards the hallway as I heard Harry running down the stairs. “I cut myself,” I said quietly as I looked at him scared.

“Yeah, I saw that. You okay?” he asked as he came over. “Come on, let’s go sit down in the living room,” he looked at the camera and did a quick little smile before keeping me steady as we walked into the living room.

“Is it bad?” I asked squeezed my eyes shut and sniffled. “I’m sorry for ruining the live stream, Flossie,” I whimpered and felt a tear running down my cheek.

“Oh, darling. You didn’t ruin anything, don’t worry about that,” Florence said as she wiped away the tear and stroked my cheek gently. “I’m going to go turn it off and then I’ll come right back okay?”

“You don’t have to stop for me,” I cried, feeling super guilty.

“I want to, darling,” she smiled and pressed a kiss to my cheek before walking quickly back into the kitchen.

Letting out a sob, I leaned against Harry as he pulled me into his lap.

“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m going to lift away the kitchen towel and have a look,” Harry murmured as he rocked me back and forth just slightly. “Look away or close your eyes, yeah?”

I nodded and kept my eyes firmly shut as I turned my head against his chest.

“Good girl, that’s it,” Harry praised me as he started lifting away the kitchen towel, putting it under my hand. “Can you take your other hand away, please? I need to have a look at the cut, baby,” he said as he stroked my hand.

I shook my head as I gripped my hurt thumb tighter. “No!” I whimpered and let out another sob. “I’m scared,” I cried, leaning on him.

“I know, it’s okay. We’re going to fix you up, baby,” Harry comforted me. “Could you get the first aid kit?” he asked as Florence came back.

“Can you look up at me?” he asked as he cupped my cheek and tilted my head a bit.

Whimpering, I opened my eyes and looked at him.

He gave me a little smile as he stroked my cheek. “Florence is getting the first aid kit. Then we’re going to have a look, we’re going to clean it and bandage it up. Three nice little steps. We’ll be so gentle and go as quick as we can,” he explained.

I couldn’t help but let out another sob. “Is there a lot of blood?” I asked as I heaved for my breath.

“No, there’s not a lot of blood. Just a little. The normal amount,” he said as Florence pulled the coffee table close to the couch and took a seat on it.

“How about you and me stay just like this and Florence has a look at your hand, baby? Is it your thumb that’s hurt?” he asked as he glanced over at Florence.

“I think so,” I replied with a sniffle.

“I need you to let it go now,” Harry nodded as he kept stroking my cheek and keeping eye contact with me. “If you want to hold something you can hold on to my shirt or the kitchen towel,” he added.

Slowly letting go of my thumb, I whimpered as I could feel the blood pumping in it, pain spreading. “No, it’s not good!” I cried and went to grab it again.

Harry shifted me around slightly so he could hold me close and grab my good hand, keeping it away from my thumb. “Keep looking at me, I promise everything is fine,” he said as I whined.

Florence grabbed my wrist firmly to keep it still. “Darling, I’m going to gently hold the tip of your thumb and turn your hand a bit,” she told me.

“Is there a lot of blood? Is it deep?” I asked as I tried to take a deep breath. “I bet there’s a lot of blood,” I mumbled as I started feeling faint again. Whimpering, as I blinked quickly as black dots appeared, I gripped Harry’s hand tightly.

“Baby? Take deep breaths, yeah?” Harry said and shook me slightly.

“She’s out,” Harry said and held you close.

Florence glanced up at your face and quickly grabbed the wound cleanser from the box and opened it. “Right, I’ll try and clean this up real quick then,” she said as she poured some over the cut, using the kitchen towel to get the blood off around the fingers and sanitizing the wound.

She had almost cleaned away all the blood and had checked the cut and decided that bandaging it would be enough, no need for strips or stitches when you started coming to.

Groaning, I took a deep breath as I opened my eyes and looked at Harry.

“Hi, baby,” he smiled as he let go of my hand so he could stroke a hand over my hair before stroking his thumb back and forth over my cheek again. “How you feeling?” he asked.

“Did I pass out?” I asked, trying to not think about what Florence was doing.

Harry nodded. “Just for a bit. Maybe for a minute or so,” he smiled.

“Your thumb looks good, darling. Just going to clean it a bit more than we can put a little bandage on,” Florence said as she kept cleaning the blood off.

“No hospital?” I asked as I sucked in my bottom lip and bit down on it.

“No hospital,” Florence replied as she gave my hand a squeeze before getting the bandage. She quickly put some gauze over the cut before wrapping a little bandage around it and securing it with some tape. “There you go! All done. Just going to clean up your other hand now,” she smiled as she picked up the kitchen towel that was quite damp with the wound cleanser and just cleaned away most of the blood with that.

“Let’s get this apron off, you’ll be more comfortable without it on,” Harry said as Florence put the bloody kitchen towel behind her.

“Okay,” I replied and slowly sat up a bit as Harry reached behind me and undid the knot and with the help of Florence took it off. Florence quickly looked at my hoodie to see if there was any blood on it but couldn’t see anything.

“How about we order some pizza for dinner? Does that sound nice? We can have the pasta tomorrow,” Florence said as she packed up the first aid kit.

I nodded. “Sorry I ruined dinner,” I whispered as I moved around a bit so I could cuddle Harry more.

“You have nothing to apologize for, darling,” Florence smiled as she gave me a little kiss. “Now you cuddle Harry as much as you can cause once I’ve put this away and ordered the pizza it’s my turn,” she said as she grinned.

“Okay,” I replied and wrapped my hands around him tightly as I listened to Harry and Florence jokingly fighting over who should get to cuddle me. Smiling, I closed my eyes and enjoyed Harry’s cuddles for now, full well knowing Florence would win their little ‘fight’.

[twistedtranslations]

Kalim Al Asim - Master Chef

You can unlock this story by getting Kalim’s SR Master Chef

Translation under the cut

Chapter 1

Cafetaria - Judging Venue

A little while before the cooking preparations start-

Kalim: Chef! Please take care of me!

Trey: Well, aren’t you excited?

Ghost chef: He certainly is. Were you perhaps looking forward to the Master Chef program?

Kalim: Yeah! I’ve always been told that “I’m not allowed to use kitchen knives or stoves because they’re dangerous”. That’s why I pretty much never cooked before. But they gave me the okay because a professional is instructing me today! So I’m super excited to try some real cooking!

Ghost chef: S-So, they forbid you to touch knives and stoves? You must’ve grown up in quite an overprotective household. Nevertheless, I am elated that you were looking forward to this program so much! I am eager to teach you. Let me list the meals we’re going to make today.

Kalim: We’re going to make biryani, right?

Ghost chef: Yes. Biryani is a seasoned rice with meat and all kinds of ingredients and spices. We steam curry and rice together, alternated on top of each other in layers. Originally it was a dish of the royal court, and is served a lot at festivals~

Kalim: That’s great! Seems like a perfect dish to welcome guests with.

Trey: Hey Kalim. I have one question… You’re always hosting the banquets. Have you never worked behind the scenes? If you never did, I understand why you wouldn’t know how to cook on purpose but…

Kalim: Now that you say it, Jamil always takes care of the preparations, not me. But this time I know that it’s the host's job to cook the meals to entertain the guests at the banquet. Seeing a chunk of meat roast in front of you, cutting stuff up… I really wanted to try it myself!

Trey: I see. So that’s why you took up Master Chef.

Kalim: Yeah. I can entertain more guests by learning more ways to delight them. By the way, you’re in charge of making the sweets at Heartslabyul’s tea parties, aren’t you? You seem like an expert at receptions, so if you have any secrets, please tell me.

Trey: I don’t think you should use our Unbirthday parties as reference. It’s basically just a gathering of people of our own. It’s different from your parties with guests from all over. And even if you were to use it as a reference… Don’t you want to try making sweets for divided preferences?

Kalim: Huh! So you do it like that. I just want to make everyone eat whatever I like… But yeah, there probably are some people who don’t like peculiar tasting herbs. I realized that next time I hold a feast, I should have a menu that everyone loves and not only ornate dishes. I just want to please as many people as I can!

Ghost chef: Indeed, the guests’s wishes are most important for hospitality. I too stand in the kitchen every day to see the smiles of our students. But enough chattering. It’s about time to cook!

Kitchen

Ghost chef: Kalim, there are enough ingredients to make this recipe three times. In the unlikely event that you fail, we’ll be fine. Relax and enjoy the process.

Kalim: Gotcha! I’ll do my best!

Ghost chef: First, we should cut the ingredients. I’ll have you cut the ginger, garlic, onions and tomatoes. Let’s start with the tomato. Put the flat side on the chopping board. That makes it easier to cut.

Kalim: The flat side… Like this?

Ghost chef: Yes! Now you take the knife with your dominant hand. Hold the tomato down with your other hand so it won’t move when cutting. Put the knife in front of you and press down the middle, while moving back and forth to cut it. Try to use big movements instead of force.

Kalim: Softly with big movements… Wow, I cut the tomato in half!

Ghost chef: Yes, well done! Continue cutting it like that.

Ghost chef: Okay, we finished cutting everything. Next up is…

Kalim: Hm? Hey, chef. There are still some uncut ingredients on the table, can’t we use them?

Ghost chef: Those were just spares in case you failed. You can add ingredients to your preference if you want to?

Kalim: Really? I’m going to use everything!

Ghost chef: E-Everything!? That’s about three times more than the recipe calls for. If you do that our next step might become problematic… Are you sure?

Kalim: Yeah. The more ingredients, the more our guests can eat to their heart's content. Okay, I’m cutting the rest!

Ghost chef: We have now finished cutting up all the spares. Next up is a vital part of biryani’s flavor… the curry! First, heat oil in a saucepan. Stir-fry the green cardamom, clove and cinnamon.

Kalim: Gotcha. ...Ah, wait! You know, I think it’d be splendid if we add more spices, considering we also added more ingredients.

Ghost chef: Right. If you added three times the ingredients, we should also add three times the spices…

Kalim: Great! Okay I’m adding all the spices!

Ghost chef: What?

/Pouring noise

Ghost chef: (H-HE POURED IN ALL THE SPICES~~!)

Kalim: Hahaha! I’m sure this will turn out great with all these ingredients and spices! Let’s continue cooking!

Chapter 2

Cafetaria - Judging Venue

Ruggie: Lalalalala~ Man, bein’ chosen as judge is so great for my food expenses. I’m so looking forward to it. I can already smell the aromas from the kitchen… BLERGH!! T-This intense smell… are those spices!? What the heck happened there!?

Kalim: Hey, Ruggie! So you’re the judge. That’s great! I got some biryani to serve.

Ruggie: No… I have to judge Kalim’s food…

Kalim: Here you go, bon appétit.

Ruggie: Bon appétit, he says… wait, why is there a mountain spilling off this large plate!? How many servings are there!?

Kalim: Uh, I used all the spare ingredients… I wonder how many servings there are? Anyway, it was a huge pot!

Ruggie: O-Okay. (Just as I expected, this seems spicy…) But not eating it would be a waste… I just gotta dig in!

/Chomp

Ruggie: HHHHHHHOOOOOT!! This is too spicy! Is this a punishment!?

Kalim: A-Ah? I wanted you to eat your fill, so I put in a lot of ingredients but did I overdo it? … Ruggie! You’re dripping in sweat after only one bite of the biryani! Hm… and Trey even told me that thinking about the preferences of the guests is important in hospitality. If you don’t like biryani I should just serve another…

Ruggie: ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! Eatin’ what’s served is my creed. Even if I take it home, I’ll finish it! I’m very happy that there are so many ingredients… I’ll be fine, I’ll eat it!

Kalim: H-Hey. This is the first time you made such a cornered expression!? To think I made such an inedible thing for you to persist like that… Sorry, Ruggie! I’m not used to cooking…

Ghost chef: Oh, calm down, you two! It’s fine to remake it instead of being pessimistic.

Kalim: If it weren’t that spicy you should be able to enjoy it right!?

Ruggie: Now that’s a wonderful idea!

Kalim: Okay, let me make something that you won’t regret! But how should I remake it?

Ghost chef: Right, how about this?

/Placing cutlery down

Ruggie: Hmpf… I’m so full! I’m satisfied! And the way you wrapped the spicy biryani in an omelet like omurice, and how you stewed it in coconut milk. That got me. Kalim, your do-overs were all amazing.

Kalim: Great! What a relief.

Ruggie: By the way, can I take the leftovers home?

Kalim: Of course!

Ruggie: Shshshs. I won’t have to worry about food for a few days with these!

Kalim: … While the biryani was a failure, I still learned a lot of skills and satisfied Ruggie. Thank you, chef!

Ghost chef: You’re welcome. Kalim, you honestly have a lot of potential. I want you to continue challenging your cooking.

Kalim: Really? I’ll do my best to learn many more recipes to please my guests!

Ruggie: Wait there, I think you should taste it as well...

[bcdrawsandwrites]

Fandom: Psychonauts

Rating: K+

Genre: Gen?? Sickfic?? mild H/C??? you got me, man

Characters: Caligosto Loboto, Boyd Cooper, Gloria Von Gouton, Fred Bonaparte, Crispin Whytehead, Sheegor

Warnings: Vomit, blood, depictions of sickness... (SPOILERS: implied torture + amputation)

Description: Loboto is having a very bad night. The inmates are not helping.

Beta Readers: @jaywings​ and Rocket

Notes: This fic is based on a theory that comes from a few figments in Loboto’s mental world in the demo footage of Psychonauts 2. ...also I wrote this while sick with a fever, edited it while still sick, and illustrated the cover while recovering from said sickness. have fun

—~~~—

He did not remember arriving back at the tower.

Partially because he wasn't even back in the tower, instead standing on the frosty shoreline, the chilly waves lapping at his boot heels.

Loboto stared dumbly out at the cliffside for a long moment before frustration simmered beneath his fogged mind. Yes! Of course, they wouldn't send him back to his lab. No! He could do with a good climb, especially on a frigid night like this! His chest heaved with quiet, dazed laughter before he took a gasp of cold air that grated against his sore throat.

The wind, though not harsh, cut through every part of him that wasn't covered by his shower cap or lab coat like a fine knife, as cold as it was painful. It grazed his shoulder, and his vision went white as his mechanical eyes flashed. But even with the blasted optics glitching, he could still see. His imagination ran wild with absurd visions of ridiculous things that had never happened.

On top of that, the slice of pain brought with it a violent realization that it was not the only pain he was in. The numb shock he’d been in gave way to an agony that tore through him, ripping up and down his side, nearly bringing him to his knees. No, no, no, that pain could not be real, just like the horrific visions of red and yellow that flashed through his mind. It was all a trick—all a stupid trick from his malfunctioning eyes and his brain. Pah!

He found himself clawing at his shower cap, occasionally stopping to smack his mechanical eyes a few times until they flickered back into focus, the desolate beach snapping back into view. "Enough of this!" he growled hoarsely at the sand beneath him. "That little army man will be back any day now, and we can't keep him waiting."

With a grunt, Loboto marched forward and heaved himself up onto the first narrow ledge, already finding his body shuddering with the effort and his mind struggling to push back the imaginary waves of pain. "Ridiculous!" he blurted into the rock he leaned against for balance. "A child can climb a mountain ten times this height!" And it wasn't like he'd never done it, either. Muscle memory helped him get from one step to the other, but keeping his balance was harder than normal, especially as his mind repeatedly dipped back into brain fog.

His eyes flickered in a blink when he found himself on the ladder, his boot slipping on the frosty wood and one hand losing its grip. Realizing he was about to fall, he flung his weight back against the ladder, biting down on the nearest rung to keep himself in place. A frantic giggle worked its way through his clenched teeth—ah, teeth! Useful for so many things! They would never let him down.

If you let us down one more time—

Ripping himself away from the rung and leaving rough teeth-marks behind, he let out a snarl and heaved himself the rest of the way up the ladder and onto the ledge. He sat on his knees for the moment, his mechanical eyes pulling back as he tried to make sense of the gate that seemed to be spinning around him. No, not just the gate—the entire cliffside spun beneath him like some wild carnival ride. He couldn't remember it doing that before, but the absurdity of it made him laugh, the action tearing through his sore throat. Yet he continued to laugh until his stomach lurched and a cascade of vomit silenced him.

He managed to scoot himself away, spitting and coughing as the world slowly came to a halt. At the same time, a figure that had been sleeping against the opposite wall snapped alert with a panicked gasp.

"Ah—ah!" Boyd stammered, scrambling to his feet and whipping his head around until he spotted Loboto on the ground. "Who are you working for?"

"That fool Oleander," Loboto grumbled under his breath, his eyes swiveling to glare at him.

Boyd's eyes blinked separately before recognition dawned upon him. "Y-yes! Of course!" Fumbling with his keys, he got to work unlocking the gate. "It's said he knows the milkman..."

Gritting his teeth, Loboto shakily began to push himself back upright. A large hand suddenly clapped against his shoulder, and he gave a yell as he was heaved to his feet. Without turning to look, he struck at the one who'd grabbed him. "Tricky terrible traitors try to trap—"

"AH—no, I am no traitor, I am the guard!" Boyd cried, stumbling back and holding up his hands as Loboto found his balance.

The two stared at each other for a tense moment, Loboto's eyes glowing harshly as Boyd trembled beneath his gaze. He couldn't help feeling a twinge of satisfaction at seeing his subordinate cower.

"Th... the milk is not ready yet!" Boyd said, wincing away as he eyed the doctor's clenched fist.

Loboto stared.

"I'm lactose intolerant."

Boyd glanced at something on the ground. "I-I noticed."

With a growl, Loboto finally marched past the guard, who frantically closed the gate behind him.

Now that that mess was over, he could finally get back up to his lab and get back to—

He paused.

"SHEEGOR!"

His voice boomed through the empty grounds. It was empty of people, now empty of crows, and empty of elevators.

When his assistant did not spontaneously appear, he clenched his fist until his knuckles turned white beneath his glove. "Yes! Wonderful!" he proclaimed to no one as he stamped toward the withered garden with a harsh laugh. "I can scale this dilapidated tower myself then. Fine night for some exercise!"

He knew his way through his asylum, of course, so it wouldn't be overly difficult, but he would have much preferred the express elevator so he could get back to work immediately. But as it was, he ducked through the entrance to the greenhouse, fighting to keep steady as the action made his head spin, his back ache (no it didn’t, he was fine), and his shower cap to catch against the branches overhead. Turning his optics up, he pressed a hand down into the cap, pulling it away from the plants. He'd hoped to avoid the woman who occupied this corner of the asylum, but as he straightened his back, he bumped into one of the flowerpots, knocking it to the ground with a dull clunk.

"My, you need to buy seats in advance if you want to come to my shows!" Gloria said, turning to him with a patient, hazy smile. "No need to be harassing the paying customers."

"What do they pay you in? Leaves? Seeds?" Loboto asked, the frantic giggle that followed clashing with his strained smile.

Gloria ignored the comment, glancing him over and waving him off. "Please see yourself out. I'm not an usher, but since they seem to be ignoring their duties, I'll have to tell you you cannot bring food or drink into the theater."

Swiveling his optics in an approximation of an eye roll, Loboto turned away to head out the other side of the greenhouse. "I don't have any."

"Not anymore, but anyone can see that wine you've sloshed onto your nice suit."

Loboto froze.

"It's a wonder it didn't get onto the carpet—"

The next thing he knew, he was staring down at an entire line of flower pots that lay in pieces on the floor of the greenhouse.

"Oh!" Gloria cried. "I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure the ushers will attend to this ruffian, and the play can resume..."

He left her to continue rambling to her imaginary audience as he tried to rid the imaginary nonsense (visions, pain, glowing yellow eyes) from his mind. "Fickle fumbling females feeling faint for fading flowers..." he mumbled as he stepped into the lower floor of the asylum. It brought its usual sights and sounds of one of the former orderlies dozing over a makeshift game board (with stolen game pieces, he noted), the artist in the room overhead scraping old brushes furiously against a canvas, and finally Crispin standing dutifully in front of the asylum's only other elevator.

"Crispin!" Loboto said, and the man turned to face somewhere slightly to his left. "Let me up, will you?"

"Of course, Doctor Loboto." Crispin turned toward the elevator controls, only to pause, his dull eyes squinting as he turned back. "Wait..."

"Wait for what?" Loboto threw out his arm in a wide gesture. "Do you want to hear that army man ranting at us again? Or perhaps you find it funny! Though it is, isn't it? Shouting about sneezing powder and tanks! HAH!"

While he'd been talking, Crispin had been leaning forward, eyeing him up and down. He frowned. "You're not Doctor Loboto," he said at length.

"WHAT?!"

Behind him, Fred sprang to his feet. "Sacré bleu! We have fallen asleep on ze battlefield!"

Ignoring the man and his terrible French accent, Loboto stepped closer to Crispin, finding himself trembling—in rage or in suppressed laughter or something else, he wasn't sure. "Of course I'm Doctor Loboto! I was, last I checked. Highly trained and professional!"

"Yes, well," Crispin began, leaning back and raising a brow, "the real Doctor Loboto does not wear an actual straitjacket. It's merely a strappy jacket fashioned from one."

"This is my jacket, you milky-eyed moron!" Loboto cried, tugging on the front of his coat in demonstration. "It doesn't have my arms tied up!" He lunged toward Crispin to grab him by the collar, but stumbled as the world spun once more. He struggled to keep his stomach from flipping again.

"Well, that's because you're wearing it poorly. But you are certainly not Doctor Loboto. I can tell. You don't have the right jacket, or the right complexion." He tipped his head. "The real Doctor Loboto is blue, not sickly gray. As you can see, you can't fool me. Now go back to wherever you came from and—"

"He has returned from ze war!" Fred blurted behind him. He blinked, then shook his head, hunching in on himself. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt, we really shouldn't—" He straightened again. "Yes, shut up! We are in ze presence of a great war hero!"

Crispin rolled his eyes. "What are you going on about now, Fred?"

"Do you not see? He bears ze blood of his enemies upon his robes, and ze scars of victory—"

Loboto whirled on him faster than he could think, managing a swift kick to Fred's shin.

With a yelp, the man crashed to the ground, curling up on himself and whining. "Ohhh... can we just postpone the battle until morning?" He twitched. "NON! Ze enemy never sleeps, so neither shall we!"

"Well, Fred's down for the count again," Cripsin remarked. "So if you're done, kindly step away from my elevator and off the nearest cliff, thanks."

Loboto wanted nothing more than to knock Crispin to the ground and find a few bad teeth to remove, but his vision was blurring and flickering, and he found it hard to think.

"No, really, we can't fight in the dark, and the enemy can't either, can they?" "Rrrrrghhh, I suppose you are right, for once. We shall camp here for now, but come sunrise, we fight!"

A weak laugh made its way past his lips as he stared down at the former orderly settling on the cobblestone. Yes, that crazy man had a point. There was no point in fighting tonight—he'd get his work done in the morning. And that work would have to include getting back into his lab in the first place.

After a brief moment, he snatched an item from the floor before stumbling back through the greenhouse and toward the entrance.

A nice night for sleeping under the stars, he supposed.

---~~~---

Judging by how bright the world was by the time his mechanical eyes flickered back on, the sun was starting to rise. But he couldn't tell for sure when there was a large metal cage blocking his view, with something else within—

"He said he would be back by nightfall, but he hasn't come!" a high pitched voice cried as a familiar form stepped out of the elevator, her back to him. "Oh Mr. Pokeylope, do you think he's gone for good this time?"

The corner of Loboto's mouth twitched.

"Oops!" She clapped an oven mitt over her mouth. "I'm glad he's not around to hear me say that," she said as she began to turn. "If he was, he'd be—EEK!"

Sheegor jumped back at the sight of Loboto laying sprawled out at the foot of the fountain, having slept (or passed out) there the remainder of the night. He clutched his worn teddy close to his chest and stared her in the eyes.

"Oh—I—I—!" Sheegor held her pet turtle close to herself. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry Doctor Loboto, I didn't mean any of that, I—"

"Yes, well it's a nice morning, isn't it?" Loboto grumbled, tucking the teddy bear under his arm so he could push himself to his feet. His entire body ached (from sleeping on the ground, not from anything else). "A nice morning to get some work done after you left me stranded here all night!" He took a threatening—but wobbling—step forward, fist clenched.

Oddly, Sheegor didn't seem as intimidated as usual. Her mouth gaped, and her eyes darted between his face and his right side.

"What are you looking at?"

"Y... you..." A trembling mitt was covering her open mouth. "D-Doctor! What happened to you?!"

His eyes flickered. "I slept out here with a rock for a pillow."

"N-no, it's—it's—!" Her whole body was shaking now, but not, he sensed, in fear of him. It should have made him angry, but exhaustion pulled at him instead, making his frame droop.

"Yes? Well, spit it out."

Sheegor held out one hand, pointed toward his right side. "Y-your arm!"

Loboto's optics slowly angled down to his right. For the first time he noticed the enormous, darkened bloodstains on his jacket, and a torn, empty sleeve hanging limply at his side.

"Oh," he said dully, feeling himself wobble as the pain finally worked its way to the forefront of his mind. "How did that happen?"

At once the world tipped to the side, and Sheegor caught him, straining to keep him from fully collapsing to the ground.

Wordlessly she helped him into the elevator, letting him lean onto her while he bit back the urge to scream. He wanted to protest, to berate her for touching him, but everything felt distant, even the upper floor of the asylum as they rapidly ascended toward it. And anyway, once they reached the top, anything he would have said was held back by his rolling stomach ejecting whatever bile still occupied it.

As he gagged, he could hear Sheegor whispering to the turtle in her mitts: "I know, I know, but I-I can't leave him like that—th-the asylum wouldn't... w-we were supposed to..."

"Just... get back to work... Sheegor," he managed to slur around the acrid taste in his mouth. Bitter bile breaks brittle bones of the mouth.

Sheegor looked from him to her turtle a few times, her mouth wobbling, and carefully eased his arm over her hunched back again. Instead of leading him to his lab, however, she led him down into the asylum, into the usual room he slept in: a mostly-intact bedroom with a mattress and blankets over a broken bed frame shoved into one corner, a chair and a desk with papers scattered across it, and a meticulously crafted and framed (and official) DDS license on the wall.

After easing him down into the bed, Sheegor stepped back, looking away. "Um... I-if you want, Doctor, I can clean that robe..."

His initial thought was that the blood stains made a wonderful addition to his ensemble, but glancing down at them again caused his brain to supply him with more awful, made-up nonsense. No, he wouldn't have that any longer.

With some amount of struggling he managed to get the thing off, unceremoniously tossing it in Sheegor's general direction. She managed to catch it and quickly scurried out. "I'll get this back to you as soon as I can Doctor bye!" she squeaked before the door slammed behind her, leaving Loboto sitting in the empty room.

Everything felt surreal, being in familiar surroundings after spending an entire night on freezing cobblestone. The sight when his gaze turned downward, however, was less familiar: there was new stitching across his chest, and on his right shoulder where his arm had been. It was cleanly done—they hadn't wanted him too much worse for wear, since he still had a job to do for—

Oleander. He had a job to do for Oleander right now. The sneezing powder, yes. His mind drifted over the things they'd discussed in their last meeting.

They'd both figured out a way for it to be made, more or less. The remaining issue was how to properly dispense the stuff. Oleander had suggested keeping it in a bag, but that was easily-spilled, and it may lose potency if pre-ground. But what was he supposed to do? He didn't have a grinder with him on-hand at all times—

A shock of brilliance bolted through him, and he stumbled to his desk with renewed energy. He grabbed a well-chewed pencil and began to write, his non-dominant hand shaking badly as he forced it into motions it was not used to.

But that was fine. It wouldn't have that job for long.

A manic giggle bubbled out of his throat as he worked out the notes and rough sketches, detailing a jointed pepper grinder with claws and a strap to secure it to his now-unoccupied side.

This loss of a limb, baffling as it was, was exactly what he needed.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

raven-san, can we please have a wedding crashing where jade needs to marry this girl from another crime family to consolidate power and become the next head of the leech mob :)) but floyd's like I'M BORED and annoyed that his brother's being snatched up by a random chick, so he asks basketball bros, and azul, to help save jade?

This one is super long, so I added some extra sections and placed the rest of the wedding crashing below the cut!

***Spoilers for Jamil and Floyd’s Unique Magic!!***

"I object to this wedding...!"

Pre-Wedding Jitters

A call comes for the twins in the dead of night, without warning. It’s their parents with exciting news: they’re naming Jade as the next Don Leech. The catch? The Leech mob’s in the middle of a merger with the Worm mob, and he’ll have to marry Don Worm’s daughter to secure the deal.

Jade, ever the dutiful son, is honored by his future title and calmly agrees to the arrangement. On the other hand, Floyd’s annoyed by the idea, and can’t keep quiet about his irritation. He calls out to his twin in the darkness.

“... Ne, Jade.”

“Ee, Floyd?”

“Are you really okay with going through with this? You’re just gonna do what they said? Even though you don’t know the Worms at all? Even if you’ve never met that girl before?”

“It is a request coming directly from father and mother. How could I refuse them? And, furthermore... If I do not undertake this task, then it would fall to you, the next choice to inherit the title of Don Leech. I cannot allow that to come to pass--fufu. You do so enjoy your freedom, yes?”

“... Jade, you’re so dumb sometimes. What’ll happen to your freedom, then? Will you get so busy with being the big boss and being married... that you won’t have time to play anymore?”

“... Perhaps. But that is a sacrifice I am willing to make.”

That thought doesn’t sit well with Floyd--not at all.

“I trust that you will make your own fun of the situation,” Jade reassures him. “You always do.”

As the weeks pass, Floyd sees less and less of Jade around, since he has to prepare for the wedding. Jade reassures him that he’s doing just fine, but Floyd can see right through his lies. He can tell that Jade’s more frazzled than usual--there’s a lingering to his words, and a longing in his eyes, savoring every last bit of autonomy he has before his fate is forever sealed.

Floyd hates it. He hates being lied to by his own brother, and he hates feeling powerless to stop the wedding. Floyd’s so angry that he develops this murderous aura in the weeks leading up to the wedding, which makes everyone around him shy away.

One day, he gets sick of being in the water--it’s a reminder of the wedding to come--so Floyd plays basketball on land to vent. He ends up chomping down so hard that he deflates a ball, then dunks another basketball so hard, he breaks the net.

He sprawls out on the ground and angrily shouts at the sky. His basketball bonks him on the head... and that’s when an idea hits him: maybe he can’t stop the wedding alone, but no one said he couldn’t phone some friends.

Assembling the Dream Team

Floyd first dials up Azul, who agrees to help after some whining and signing a contract agreeing to pay Azul handsomely for his services (... although truthfully, the octopus does want to help Jade, but doesn't immediately agree to do it because of his pride as a businessman).

Floyd also calls his old basketball buddies for help! Jamil and Ace are much more adamant than Azul, but Floyd strongarms them into pitching in. ("Umihebi-kun, Kani-chan, if you don't help me rescue Jade, I'll get suuuper mad, you know? I don't think you'll like me when I get mad. Moray eels are strong hunters, so I don’t think it’ll be a problem for me to track you guys down and give you a good squeeze~" "OKAY, OKAY, WE'LL DO IT!!")

Together, the four boys meet up to scheme of a way to disrupt the wedding without jeopardizing the Leech mob's future. Floyd actively leads the discussion, allowing his hidden genius to come to the surface.

Ace doesn’t contribute much to the strategy (laid out by Azul), but he does keep the spirit up with some jokes. Meanwhile, Jamil provides snacks for them when they work late into the night (though he keeps passing semi-glares to Azul whenever the octopus compliments him or tries to be friendly).

In preparation for the crashing, Azul brews some potions to give Jamil and Ace so they can take on temporary merforms. After all, the wedding will be underwater, in the Coral Sea, and they’ll need tail fins.

The date of destiny draws ever closer... and Floyd's never been so excited to cause chaos in his whole life.

The Crashing - Team Azul & Jamil

They split into two pairs on the day of the wedding—Azul and Jamil, and Floyd and Ace. Floyd uses his position as the future son-in-law to Don Worm to arrange a meeting between himself and the don... except Azul and Jamil will show up instead.

Don Worm shows up to the meeting in his finest clothes (which is very little, given that he’s a merman), sounding a bit annoyed the sudden summoning. “Make this quick, I’ve got to go see my baby girl’s big day... Wait. You fellas aren’t the F. Leech boy.”

“No, we aren’t, sir. We are his representatives... Proxies, if you will,” Azul insists, giving his warmest and most welcoming smile. He uses a tentacle to tug on Jamil’s tail, forcing him to smile too. “You see, there is an important business matter we needed to discuss with you on behalf of Floyd.”

“Hoh? And what would that be?”

“I believe my business associate would be better off explaining the matter than myself.” Azul gestures to Jamil, who has his head down.

“Oi, what’s with you? Don’t you know who I am, boy? It’s rude to not look your elders in the eye when they are speaking to you!! Show me the respect I deserve, from one professional to another!!”

“My apologies, sir.” Jamil looks up, locking eyes with the mob boss. “... Is this better?”

“Yes, that’s...”

“Snake Whisper.”

Don Worm suddenly goes glassy-eyed and slack-jawed. Azul claps at the sight, showering his partner with compliments. “As expected of the talented Jamil-san! Even one look from you can bring a mafia lord to his downfall. Truly, your Unique Magic is most impressive!”

“Save your flattery for later.”

Azul’s lips curl into a smirk as he whips out a golden contract from his briefcase and offers it to the don. “Now then, if you wouldn’t mind, sir... sign on the dotted line.”

The Crashing - Team Floyd & Ace

Ace and Floyd rush to the wedding venue, their tails cutting through the water like knives as they swim at a breakneck pace. Ace can barely keep up with Floyd, who surges far ahead.

“H-Hey, should we really be barging in like this?! Don’t mob families have weapons and other dangerous stuff? Is there a backdoor we can take instead? Hello?! Floyd-senpai, are you listening to me?!” (He isn’t.)

The open, underwater comes into view, and Floyd barrels in without any hesitation, tearing right through some decorations and knocking over the wedding cake with his tail. A loud CRASH! echoes through the waters, drawing eyes to him.

Jade stares at his brother from the altar—wide eyed, but a mirthful smile on his lips. Floyd waves to him, and then to his mom and dad in the crowd of guests. “Hiii, Jade! I’m here to pick you up now.”

The Worm girl starts sobbing, wailing something about how her special day’s been ruined, and where is her papa to put an end to this? At her signal, security guards, and some of the rougher looking guests—Worm family associates—lunge at Floyd, claws and teeth out. A few of them have produced wands, and what seem to be guns—loaded with harpoons.

“Bind the Heart!” Objects and stray magic go flying in all directions, hitting both people and wedding decorations. Cloth tears, columns crumble—but it’s one man against many, and he can only bind so many hearts before the blot starts to stack.

Ace makes it just in time, sending their foes and their weapons hurtling through the water with a blast of wind. “This is why I said to be careful, dammit! Your Unique Magic’s such a crapshoot—don’t just use it whenever, or you’ll be sushi!!!”

“Ahahahah! Kani-chan’s being all heroic today! That’s so cute. Don’t worry, I can play my part, too...!!”

Using his tail, Floyd hooks around a drifting merman and chucks him straight into another. They collide with a CRACK!—but Floyd barely registers it. He’s already bolting off, grabbing heads and smashing them together, slicing through others like a knife through butter.

There’s a crazed, frenzied look to him, gleeful laughter cutting through the waters and mixing with the Worm bride’s screeching. I forgot how scary Floyd-senpai can be, Ace realizes. (Jade and Floyd’s parents are cheering for him from their seats.)

Jade looks quite proud of his brother, even laughing along to the brutal slaughterfest. His bride stares at him incredulously. “Stop that brute! He’s ruining MY special day!!”

“No,” Jade replies calmly. “I don’t think I will. This is far too amusing to let it end so soon.”

She lets out a frustrated scream and launches herself at her groom, hands going for his throat. The Worm girl is slammed back with a strong hit to her gut, courtesy of Jade’s tail.

She flies back, slamming into a column—and feels a tail wrapping around her and squeezing tight. Constricting her to the point where it was difficult to breathe. A livid mermaid glares down at her, teeth bared in a snarl.

“No one lays a hand on my children,” Mama Leech declares. “No one.”

From the corner of her eye, the Worm girl can see that Jade has cast off his bow tie and flitted over to Floyd, embracing happily in a battlefield adorned with red ribbons trailing through the water. Her vision is abruptly blocked off by a broad-shouldered merman wearing a grimace.

“Now then, what shall we do with this one?” Papa Leech wonders aloud—though from his tone of voice, he has nothing good in store.

The Aftermath

“You’re all fish bait when daddy hears about this...!” the Worm girl warns, her words raspy. “Th-The merger won’t go through...! There’ll be war between the Leeches and the Worms...!”

A loud throat clearing comes from behind. “Fortunately, that won’t be happening.”

Azul and Jamil make their appearance, the octopus merman smugly showcasing a contract. “Ashengrotto—Azul Ashengrotto, legal and business extraordinaire at your service, Don Leech and Lady Leech.”

Papa Leech grunts. “What’s that you’ve got there?”

“This?” Azul’s smirk widens. “Why, it’s a prenuptial stating that, in the case that an act of violence is enacted by the bride toward the groom, the marriage is considered null and void... and the bride’s family assets are to be claimed by the groom. Signed by Don Worm himself.”

“Wh-What?! Impossible!! How did you get daddy to sign such a stupid deal?!”

“Oh,” Jamil says nonchalantly, “we have our ways.”

“So... Uh, Jade-senpai’s still gonna be the next Don Leech?! And he’s gonna be in charge of an even bigger and richer family... How is that any better than the situation before?! You’re just giving him more resources for committing crimes!”

At that moment, two hands come down on Ace’s shoulders, causing him to freeze up.

“Kani-chaaaaan! Everyone!! Thanks so much for your help~”

“Yes, you have my sincerest thanks, Ace-san, Jamil-san... Azul.”

“It is my pleasure to assist such VIP clients. Ah, but there remains the matter of my promised payment—” (Jamil and Ace internally groan at Azul’s words.)

“Payment?” Don Leech scoffs. “After the ballsy operation you boys pulled off today... I’m more inclined to give you job offers instead of a one time sum. How do you lads feel about being hired as the Leech family’s personal lawyer, interrogator, and... well, whatever the heart one is good at.”

“My, my! Such a generous and lucrative offer—“

“There is no way I’m accepting that, especially if that means working with Azul.”

“Oi, I’ll have you know I’m good at lots of stuff!! I’m the one that saved Floyd’s tail fins, is no one gonna acknowledge that?!”

“You did amazing, sweetie!!” Mama Leech chirps—her tail grip tightening until the Worm girl passes out. Ace leaps back in fright. “As a reward, why don’t you let me give you a hug?”

“S-STAY BACK!!”

“Ahahahah! Everyone’s getting along so well, Jade. Isn’t this fun? You wouldn’t be able to enjoy this if you had gone to get hitched.”

“Fufufu. You are correct, Floyd. How sad it would have been if I were to miss out on touching moments such as this. From the bottom of my heart... I thank you for thinking of me, and for rushing to my aid. I could not have asked for a better brother.”

... What Floyd doesn’t know is that this was all according to keikaku Jade’s own machinations. He would never take the order to marry lying down—but he couldn’t outright defy it without immediate consequences, either.

Thank the Great Seven Jade has reliable puppets friends to help him out of a pinch. I’ll be certain to put the additional funds we have gained to good use... Perhaps to start a little mushroom farm.

[tennisracketpacket]

𝐶𝐻𝐴𝑃𝑇𝐸𝑅 𝐹𝑂𝑈𝑅: “𝐶𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑚𝑒, 𝐶𝑜𝑜𝑘𝑖𝑒”

series masterlist

3,059 words

warnings: cuteness, blood, sadness

give me feedback, please!

This is what James looks like. Aaron Johnson is gorgeous.

“After you,” James charmingly says, opening the door for me. I walk in, looking around the restaurant. Lights line the ceiling and candles are placed on each table. The host directs us to our table and James pulls out my chair.

“This place is beautiful,” I sit down and look at the roses in the vase on the table.

“Not as beautiful as you,” James grabs my hand that is on the table and kisses it. Thank god for my melanin because I am blushing. I think back to the last time I heard someone say that to me. Peter. My thoughts are interrupted by the waitress. She places down two menus.

“You guys are a beautiful couple, wave when you’re ready.” She walks away and I look at James who has a stupid grin on his face.

“I like the sound of that.” He picks up the menu as I laugh in response.

The waitress placed our food down after we order and it looks delicious.

“Enjoy your meal, it’s nice seeing you, James.” He smiles at her and she walks away, causing me confusion.

“So, what do you enjoy doing in your free time?” I grab my fork and knife, continuing to cut into my steak.

“Um- nothing really,” He gives me a puzzling look. “I work, eat, sleep, and then repeat.” I take a bite of the steak and nearly moan at how great it is. “What about you?”

“I thought I was the only one with that routine, adulting sucks.” We laugh together.

“Yeah, the last time I had a life was two years ago.” I realized that I may have fucked up, almost mentioning my ex. I hope he doesn’t ask.

“What happened two years ago?” I shove another piece of steak in my mouth and mentally cuss myself out. I finish chewing my steak as he awkwardly watches me.

“Well,” I pause. “I didn’t work at the New York Times or ever imagined that I would,” I pause once more. “I also had a boyfriend who I thought I would spend the rest of my life with but that didn’t work out.” He nods and takes a sip of his champagne.

“I see,” I wait for his answer, wondering what he is gonna say next. “Well two years ago, I worked here actually and probably couldn’t even afford to order a water here.” He laughs and I join him, making sense of how the waitress knew his name. “Dessert?” I nod my head eagerly, causing him to laugh.

We talked more and I got to know who a little bit about James. He opens the restaurant door once again for me and I thank him. The night’s breeze hits me and I suddenly hug myself. James takes of his jacket and places it on my shoulders. I thank him once again.

“If one of us is gonna freeze, it’s gonna be me.” I kiss him on his cheek.

“Y/n?” I hear a familiar voice.

“Peter?” I look at him. His hair has grown a lot more and he looks leaner. I finally snap out of it. “James this is Peter, my ex-boyfriend.” James face loses the confusion and he goes to shake Peter’s hand.

“Nice to meet you,” James says as Peter accepts the handshake.

“Nice to meet you, too.” There is a moment of awkward silence as the three of us stand there. “How’ve you been?” Peter finally breaks the silence as he talks to me.

“I’ve been- good,” I stutter and he nods. “You?”

“Good, good.” There is another awkward silence as he answers the question.

“Well I’ve gotta get her home,” James says. I mentally thank him as he breaks the silence.

“Yeah, yeah, of course.”

“It was nice seeing you, Peter.” Without fully thinking it through, I go in to hug him. He accepts my embrace. He smells the same and it brings back old memories. I pull away before it gets too weird.

“It was nice seeing you, too. Get home, safely.” He walks away and disappears from my life again in the New York City night. I turned towards James.

“That was…something,” I say and he chuckles.

“Yes, it was,” He throws a hand over my shoulder and we walk to his car.

“We should do this again, I mean if you want to?” I smile as he cutely babbles. I kiss him to stop him from continuing.

“Yes, I would like to do this again.”

“Okay,” He says back. I start to take off his jacket and he stops me.

“Give it back to me on our next date and hopefully we don’t run into any of our exes.” I laugh and start to unlock my apartment. I kiss him once more. I feel his arms wrap around my waist, pulling me closer. I pull away and we both gasp for air.

“I had a great time, James.” I look into his eyes and he smiles.

“I’m glad you did,” I peck his lips.

“Good night, James.” I pull away from him and open my door.

“Hey, can I pick you up for some coffee tomorrow morning before work?” I turn around and look at him from my doorway.

“Yeah, that sounds great.”

“Great, I’ll see you tomorrow morning. Good night, Y/n.” I nod and close my door. I hear noises from outside the door and look through the peephole. James is dancing outside the door. I laugh.

“Nice moves!“ I yell through the door and he stops dancing.

The next morning, I wake up earlier. I’m in a better mood than I usually am. I throw the covers off me and jump out of bed. I open my curtains, soaking up the sun.

“Alexa, play Super Bass,”

I brush my teeth and listen to my music. I put my toothbrush down and head to my bedroom. I scan through my closet and pick an outfit. I check the time. Why didn’t I ask him what time he was going to pick me up? I hear a knock at the door like clockwork. I walk to the door and open it to see a smiling James.

“Good morning, gorgeous. Ready to go?” I smile at him and approach him. I wrap my hands around his neck and gently kiss him.

“Almost, I gotta put my shoes on.” I walk back inside and he follows behind. I grab my keys, purse, and then put my shoes on.

“Ready,” He offers his hand out and I take it. I lock my apartment door and we walk down the stairs to his car. He opens his car door for me.

“Such a gentleman,” I jokingly say as I get into his car.

“Only for you, my lady.” I laugh at his response and he runs around and hops in the front seat.

“So, where are you taking me?” He puts the key in the ignition.

“A personal favorite of mine, Penelope.”

“Do they have food, because I’m starving?” He laughs and pulls out of the parking lot.

“They have great food,”

“Yes!” He chuckles and turns up the radio.

“I love this song,” He continues turning up the radio and I recognize that it’s “Somebody I Used to Know”. He starts humming.

“But you didn’t have to cut me off,” He quietly sings.

“Make it like it never happened and that we were nothing,” I sing quietly and he glanced at me.

“And I don’t even need your love,”

“But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough,” I sing with him.

“You didn’t have to stoop so low,” He looks at me when we reach a red light.

“Have your friends collect your record and then change your number,” We hear a honk behind us. The light is green and James continues driving.

“My bad,” I laugh at what he says.

We arrive at Penelope and we order our food.

“How’s your food?” I look up from my food to look up at James.

“It’s delicious,” I say covering my mouth because I had food in my mouth. He laughs and takes a bite of his eggs.

After breakfast, James drives us to work. We joke along the way about how we coincidentally went to high school together. We just never saw each other or talked to each other.

Jacki is talking to a worker, Victor, with who she is clearly flirting with.

“I’m gonna talk to Jacki, I’ll see you upstairs?” He nods and goes in for a kiss, which I gladly accept. I hear Jacki squeal and pull away from James to look at her. She is looking at me and James. James walks over to the elevator and I walk over to her desk. Victor waves and walks away.

“I see you!” She yells causing me to shush her. I laugh at her reaction, seeing other people look at us.

“Guess who I saw last night,” She taps her chin with her finger.

“Jesus,” She says.

“Girl, stop playing. I saw Peter.” She gasps.

“No way. Did you slap the skinny motherfucker?” She says a little too loudly and she realizes. I cover my loud laugh.

“No! And he actually looks buff.” She raises an eyebrow. “We ran into him after dinner and it was awkward.”

“Really?” Her phone rings. “Fuck, I gotta take this. Talk later?” I nod and she picks up her phone. I walk to the elevator. As the elevator door opens, my boss rushes over to me. She hands me a camera.

“Spider-Man is downtown right now fighting bad guys. I need you to go get some pictures, now!”

“But I didn’t drive to work today,”

“I’ll take her!” James says and he walks over to me. She practically pushes us into the elevator.

“Go! And get some good pictures!”

We drive to where the alleged crime takes place. Spider-Man is beating up bad guys and other people watch from a distance. I hop out of his car and run towards the action.

“Y/n!” I hear James yell from behind me. I don’t stop until I get a good view, grabbing my camera. “Hey?” James catches up to me, trying to catch his breath. “Are you crazy?” This causes me to look at him.

“No,” I sternly say.

“Are you sure about that? You could’ve gotten hurt.”

“I’m a safe distance away.” I pick up the camera and take a picture.

“Seriously!” He’s yelling now and I look at him once more.

“I think you’re overacting, James. I’m fine.” I continue taking pictures. He trudged away and I shake my head. I move away to get a different angle. I go to take a picture but I don’t see him. The perpetrators are webbed up against the building.

“Hey, stranger!” I jump as I hear a voice behind me. I turn around and see Spider-Man. I place my hand on my chest, catching my breath. “Sorry. So, what you doing?” He leans against the building.

“Taking pictures of you in action,”

“Oh, you want to see me in action?” Before I could answer his sly remark, James approached.

“Oh my goodness it’s Spider-Man!” James nearly screams like a fangirl.

“You want an autograph, buddy.” He pats himself down knowing damn well he doesn’t have pockets. “Sorry, out of luck.” I may be wrong but I sort of sense jealousy from him.

“No, no, I’m just a big fan.” He pauses and turns towards me. “I’m sorry, Y/n. I just want you to be safe. I didn’t mean to yell.” I look into his eyes and he looks like he really means it. I hate fighting.

“It’s okay,” I hug him and I hear Spider-Man clear his throat.

“If I wanted to say some PDA, I would watch the Notebook.” He pops his hip out. “I’ll see you, tonight?” I nod and go to say something but he’s already crawling up the building.

“Tonight?” James questions me and raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah, I’ve been interviewing him for a couple nights now, for my article.” He goes wide-eyed.

“That’s so cool!” He clears his throat as his voice goes a little higher than usual. I laugh as he shows how much of a nerd he is for Spider-Man. I laugh and peck his lips.

“Let’s go,” He wraps his arm around my waist as we walk to his car.

I sit on my apartment building’s roof, after doing my usual routine of setting a blanket down and grabbing my laptop. I check the time on my watch. After my shift, James drove me home. He wanted to join me for my interview with Spider-Man but I told him no because of how he reacted by seeing James. I hear a thud behind and turn around. He’s holding flowers but they are mangled.

“These are for you.” I take them and set them beside my laptop.

“Thanks,” He sits crisscross in front of me.

“So how was your date?” I’m surprised by the question.

“Uh- it was great actually. I haven’t been on one in a long time.” I accidentally overshare.

“I doubt that, a pretty girl like you probably has all the men in this city lining up at her door.” I become flustered but laugh it off.

“Nope, not in my case. I just didn’t allow myself to be out there.” He tilts his head.

“Why?”

“I’m interviewing you, buddy. Remember?”

“Sorry I meant to say if you don’t mind me asking.” I sigh as I’m about to tell some stranger about my love life.

“Well, my last relationship was two years ago but it really messed me up. I loved the guy with my whole heart and he just body slams it.” He lets out a laugh.

“I’m sorry but you didn’t have to say body slam.” I join his laughter.

“That’s what it felt like at the time. You feel like you know someone and then turns out you don’t. It is what it is. I actually ran into him the other night. It was so weird, knowing he’s been here this whole time. ”

“I should write an article about you,” We laugh again.

We finished up and he was getting ready to go. This would be the last night I needed to interview him seeing as my deadline was in two days.

“Hey, Spider-Man.” He turns around to look at me. “What should I call you? You know my name but I don’t know yours.”

“Call me,” He pauses to think. “Cookie,” Holy shit.

“Peter?” He jumps off the roof. I stay there for a moment. It had to be a coincidence. I gave Peter that nickname because he could never bake cookies even after I walked him through the process myself. Was it him the whole time? I grab my blanket, laptop, and the mangled flowers, stumbling back to my apartment.

I toss and turn in bed not being able to sleep. I grab my phone and scroll through my contacts. I couldn’t bring myself to delete his. I hover over the call button. What if he changed his number? What if he blocked me? I press the call button and rip off a two-year-old band-aid. He’s probably asleep. The phone rings once and someone picks up. I breathe out.

“Hello,” I finally say.

“Hello,” I hear Peter’s sleepy voice.

“Shit, did I wake you up? I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay. I couldn’t sleep anyway.”

“I know it’s late and random but can I see you?” There is silence.

“Yes, meet me at our spot?”

“I’ll see you in 15,” I hang up the phone and turn on my back. What did I just do?

Peter looks at me and I prepare for his reaction. He kisses me and spins me around.

“I’m gonna be a father!” He puts me down and kisses me again. That was unexpected. “We’ll figure it out, okay.” I start to cry and he pushes the hair out of my face.

I wake up to a sharp pain in my stomach. I pull the covers off me but see a pool of blood between my legs. I scream and cause Peter to wake.

“Peter, something’s wrong!” He looks down at the blood and back to me. He picks me up in bridal style and I groan in pain. He grabs the keys and carries me down the stairs. He puts me in the car and drives to the ER.

“Help!” He yells and helps me out of the car. I almost fall but he catches me. Some nurses help me onto a bed. Peter stays by me the whole time as they rush me inside and I blackout.

I slowly blink and wake up. Peter is holding my hand and is sniffling.

“Peter,” I weakly say and Pete looks up.

“Hey, hey, baby. I’ll get the doctor.” He kisses my forehead and runs out. Not long after, Peter and a doctor come in. The doctor smiles at me.

“Hi, Y/n. I’m Dr. Stevens. How are you feeling?”

“‘Like absolute donkey doo,” Peter laughs weakly and the doctor joins in. I try to sit up and Peter tries to stop me. I sit up anyway.

“What about my baby?” Dr. Stevens takes a deep breath.

“Your baby didn’t survive, you had a miscarriage.” I cover my mouth with my hands as the cries start to come. “You should get some rest, Ms. Y/n.” He walks out and Peter gets into the bed with me. He embraces me and I sob into his chest.

I didn’t realize that tears were streaming down my face and I wipe them away. Our spot is a park where Peter and I have shared many memories. I park next to his car and get out. I see him sitting on a bench. I mentally prepare myself and continue walking toward him. I walk around the bench. He softly looks at me with those eyes. Damn, those eyes.

“Hey,” He says and I put my hands in my coat pocket. I sat down next to him.

“Hey,” Peter looks up at the moon.

“Thanks for seeing me, I wasn’t sure you would pick up.” He looks up at me.

“I will always pick up for you.” I smile at him.

“When were you gonna tell me?”

“Tell you what?”

“That you are Spider-man?”

[abbynx]

La Squadra Esecuzione as Best Friends Headcanons

Formaggio - Very chill, first and foremost, he is down for anything to do. Videogames? He'll try to beat your ass. Cat cafes? Heck ye he is down - The type of friend who will coax you to cut class to hang out behind the school or climb over the school fence to hang around the local arcade or theatre. But if he get caught, he won't snitch and he's willing to take responsibility. Begrudgingly. - Ohhhh physical touch is bare minimum for him. He'll occasionally lean on you, perhaps shrink himself to fit himself in your pocket just to platonically cuddle and perhaps, use you as a transport. - Will high five you as a greeting, and will high five you as a farewell. Usually followed by a hug too uwu "Bro!" He holds his hand out for a high five, in which you instinctively grant him one, when he also entwines his fingers through yours and pulling you for a hug, patting your back for a second and pulling away. "I missed you bro!" - Prepare for dumb jokes, dumb puns that he effortlessly come up with as time goes by. You can't go on a day without him cracking a joke. You'd either roll your eyes at it or laugh along with him. There's nothing in between "You see that guy over there, bro?" He leans on you, arm draped around your shoulder as he points at a person from afar. "Yeah, what?" "I say... You'd be a perfect match." You glanced at him, hearing him shake a box of matches as he wiggled his eyebrows with a dumb grin. - *Finger guns and bro intensifies* Illuso - That weird person you don't see yourself associating yourself with somehow befriended him for some reason. Most likely started when you both started to wake up at 3 AM and meet in the middle of the dark, in the kitchen, wanting to grab something to eat. At first it is awkward, but soon you learned to bond through it! And soon enough, your midnight chats extended to become actual friendships! - Seems distant, but he cares. He's the type pretend not to care about you, but will glare (or more than glare depending at the severity) at people who hurt you. He is the 'I'm the only one allowed to insult them like that' type of friend. "Huh, Formaggio hasn't been teasing me. I wonder what happened." You wondered aloud, as you say beside your friend Illuso. "Must be because of his bruised jaw. The previous mission must've been tough for him." "Yeah... That..." - Probs touched-starved. He acts irritated and push you away when you try to hug him, but secretly loves it. If you stop trying to hug him, he'd be kinda sad but will not say anything. - This friendship includes you listening to him rant about every little thing, and brag about things he can't do. He appreciates you listening to be honest, and that's initially how your friendships started anyways. - Will use derogatory terms as a term of endearment. Please don't be offended, he doesn't mean any offense "Hey idiot! Get your sorry ass right here! Risotto said we have someone to take care of!" "Thanks, dumbass." "Eyo slut! Take a look at this fugly idiot!" - Does not have the habit of knocking. In fact, he just barges into your room, through the mirror. In more than one occasion has he seen you undressed but he couldn't care less about it. "Hey dumbass can I borrow your— hey, stop screaming! Anyways I ran out of hair ties, do me a solid—" - Everyone around you being confused to how you two are most unlikely to become friends, but you two are practically unlikely twins Prosciutto - You can not stop me from assuming he is quite the mom friend if you pry his shell hard enough. Perhaps a mom friend mixed with tsundere friend. "Hey! Drink your water or I'll break your ankles! No I don't care that we're in the middle of killing someone! I packed you some water and you didn't drink it! Well shit I didn't pack it specifically for you, I just managed to pack extra! Now go ahead and drink, I'll handle this one myself! While you're at it, coat yourself with sunscreen! If I hear you whining about being burnt, I swear to God—" - If you happen to be a mom friend too, you'd be bonding over the

mutual stress of having to look over the rest of the gang over a glass of wine as chaos around you ensues because you two decided to take a small break. "Formaggio and Ghiaccio is up at it again..." You sigh, swirling the content of your stemware as the distant bickering of the two aforementioned assassins echoed. "Just... Let's just lay low. It'll be over soon." Prosciutto sighs along as well, before downing his glass of whiskey. "Hopefully." And it didn't end, as it ensued and progressive got worse. Stands were called, knives were thrown, guns were shot. And two mom friends of La Squadra almost lost their voice from all the yelling and lecturing - Will scold you for your bad habits. Bad posture? He will walk behind you, press his knee on your back and roll your shoulders back whilst he lectures you about it. Messy time management? Will buy you crap to make you keep track of time. Sleeping so late? He will take whatever you're distracted with, demand you to turn your lights off as he lights soothing scented candles and tossing you some comfortable blankets to use. Barely taking care of yourself? Bro prepare yourself. "I don't understand how you live like this! You'd be dead if you were to continue that habit! At least help me help you to make you be better!" - Very blunt and honest to the point it stings, but he never lies to people he is closed to. He prefers being upfront with his loved ones and will try to rebuild their confidence and reassure them that they can be better than what they are. "When I say you're idiotic, you're but a burden, I mean it. You have all rights to be hurt by it, but don't just live with it. Prove me wrong, that you can be better than that and you'll be the best version of yourself. I know you can do it." - Will accept hugs, but will most likely not hug back. Maybe he'll just out one hand on your back and lightly stroke it, but that's it. But in rare occasions, he will return them too. Sometimes, he'll even initiate it. - Your connection to him as a friend has lead several advantages. No one in general can make a negative comment about you with Prosciutto around. His glare alone was scary and they would not wish to stick around and find out what he can do than just glaring. - Extremely appreciates when you help him around by simply carrying things for him, fetching him coffee and actually doing your damn job properly is enough to make him be filled with gratitude. Pesci - Baby. Okay, so this boy. Boy oh boy, he is baby. Take care of him, bro. Don't coddle him to the point of him being entirely dependent on you, but sis you can always reassure and make him improve himself! Perhaps a tamer version of his relationship with his brother. - You two will mostly likely be friends because you always defend him from the others from teasing him and rooting for him. He is very grateful for it and can't thank you enough. Either that, or Prosciutto paid you to babysit him. - Will constantly cling on your arm when he's anxious. It's up to you whether you'll snap at him and slap his hand away, or just let him hang around you. He'll just simply grab your wrist, and sooner and later he'd have his body pressed against yours, completely clinging on the entirety of your arm. "D-don't leave me, Y/N! I'm scared—!" - He is extremely thankful for you watching over him and protecting and by this, he tries to improve himself a lot more just so he can confidently say he can watch over you and protect you as well - Just the sweetest little thing, whenever he'd be away with Prosciutto for a mission he'd return home bearing gifts from travel and he'd give it to you. It would be something either miniature, or something practical like a knife sharpener or something. "I-I got this for you... I hope you like it! Big bro helped me pick!" - Honestly, I can imagine him just being the best, supportive and encouraging friend there could be. If ever you needed someone to confide in, he'd just sit and listen and will certainly not repeat what you told him to others. He'll try his best to comfort

you, taking inspiration to how you comfort him and will just try his best to make you feel better. "I know life is rough and hard and bad, but you always told me it will change and soon it all be over and better. It's good that you recognise you're in a bad place, now you need to take a break and then later you won't even know you've already forgotten your problem! It's okay to be sad, too, but not for too long." - The type of friend that will share anything he has. He has a cookie with him? Shit, he'll split it in half and give the other half to you. Some soda? Well I hope you don't mind drinking from the same can as he is, he will give it to you. Melone - So this nerd isn't a complete creepy pervert, not entirely at all. He's chill for most of the time, so he's a neat company if you don't mind him bombarding you with questions regarding your genetics, heritage records, blood type, zodiac signs and whatnot. But knows when to stop. - You most likely befriended him because he is one of the chill people in the group... Somewhat. Or perhaps you just started to bond over mutual love for steamy, erotic novels from the same author. If this man has shame, his guilty pleasures would be reading these types of trashy novels filled with smut. - He is great as a wingman. Complain to him about your lack of a love life, he'll observe your types and he'll somehow come up with a list by the next day enthusiastically listing them to you in a PowerPoint presentation. "If you're into girls, I have this one right here! She's compatible with your zodiac sign, although she has quite the temper she can be extremely passionate and affectionate— or perhaps you're into men, that I have as well. Several, actually. This other fellow right here is also a part of Passione from the Human trafficking branch, stoic and quite a stern one, but knows when to lay low at times and appreciate those around him— either him or the girl, you'd make good babies together!" "Melone, what the fuck—" - Very touchy. He'd lean his head on your lap as you both read on the couch, or randomly put his head on your shoulder during meetings, grab you by the arm while crossing the road, smacking your ass as a greeting (if you tell him stop, he'd stop of course), will pretend to kiss you just so he can see your reaction, anything. He is one affectionate nut that he sometimes forget about personal spaces. If you're not particularly fond of being touched like I am, simply tell him nope. I mean, he'd be sad but will respect your boundaries. The only time he'll actually respect established boundaries, to be honest. - Knows the most random facts and will share them to you for the fun of it. Additional to that, he will also mutter his shower thoughts and random cursed facts out loud just so he can curse you with the knowledge and confusion. "Did you know that dolphins masturbate using dead fishes? Also, there was an experiment involving dolphins in which one of the scientist fell in love and had sex with it. Another fact, is that dolphins are also seen doing the deed—" "Okay, Melone, I get it! Dolphins aren't as innocent as they seem! Stop ruining it for me already!" ... "Did you know that a woman once used mayonnaise as a lubri—" "MELONE!" - Being his friends meaning being his impulse control. If he intends to use his Stand on some innocent passerby just for the heck of it (for science, as he claims), smack him by the wrist and glare at him. If he eyes a particular someone for too long that the person gets too uncomfortable, try to divert his attention away. "Ow! Y/N what the heck—!" "What did I told you about oogling at people? It's impolite and creepy, stop that!" - He may not seem like it, but bro he cares a lot. If ever you had a problem, he'd sit and listen, offer you his shoulder to cry on, and perhaps hang out to divert your attention away from what's bothering and hurting you. And if you need advice, he'll try his best to come up with a flawless solution to your problems. But if comfort is what you need, his arms are open baby. Ghiaccio

- Bro you must need emergency ear plugs for this one, he is a massive screamer, a ticking time bomb with no timer that will erupt at random. If ear plugs aren't enough, cover your ears. - Befriending him was an impulse control befriending him. Well, all you did was to constantly try to calm his tits and cool his head to the point he actually barges in your room to hang out so that he can cool his head from all of the shenanigans occuring all around him, or maybe he just had another thought about something maddening about the world. "WELL WHY?! WHY IS WOMEN'S CLOTHES SIZING CHART DIFFER FROM EACH STORE?! THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE! INCHES AND CENTIMETRES EXISTS FOR A REASON, DAMNIT!" - There are moments where he isn't screaming, thankfully and he's a decent person to talk to. If you're a listener, he'll do the talking, just ranting about things, rambling on and on, before complaining, and then another outbursts comes out. By this, you simply sigh, put a hand on his shoulder and talk to him in a gentle, calming voice. It usually does the trick. Formaggio and Melone joked about this talent of yours as witchcraft. - He appreciates you a lot and honestly doesn't know what to do without you and by that, he knows he has to reciprocate the care you give him somehow to show he is grateful of your friendship and care. He isn't the type to be physically affectionate, but he is extremely thoughtful about his closed loved onesa and prefers to be practical about it. He would save you your seat in meetings, fetch you snacks if he ran out for an errand, etc etc. Extremely observant of your mannerisms, that he might point that out to you and you won't even realise you do that. - So like, he is very protective as a friend. He will do something whenever someone has wronged you in any way. The others teasing you? Bam, he'll shoot them back with a witty insult. Your s/o cheated on you? Ohohoho boi, be prepared to see their name on a headline on the daily news. Your order was wrong? Bam, he'll have the waiter shaking in fear from a screaming, angry Italian mafioso as he demands for them to remake your order correctly. "WELL CAGACAZZO?! QUIT STANDING AROUND AND GET ORDERS CORRECTLY—" "G-Ghiaccio it's just a minor thing, let it go—" "THEY SERVED YOU AN INGREDIENT YOU SPECIFICALLY TOLD THEM NOT TO INCLUDE BECAUSE YOU'RE ALLERGIC TO IT! WHY ARE YOU LETTING THIS SLIDE OFF?!" - All in all, he's just glad you're there for him because damn, someday his temper is going to get the best of him and he doesn't know what to do. And with your friendship, he's learned how to cope with his spontaneous anger by carrying soothing stuff to ease his nerves (courtesy of your suggestions and gifts for him) - Basically the dynamic of a rapid gremlin with rabies and a calm, sunshine personified angel. Everyone (Riz, including, but he's more subtle and dry about it) joked about the unlikely friendship, and how your ears must've lost a little bit of hearing capacity. Rissoto - I feel like he'd be extremely attached to a childhood friend. You've been friends since before you underwent the drastic change by going through a lot to get to where he is now, and still the only person that stuck around with him was you. By that, you became the most trusted by him due to the fact you've known each other for very long. - As his best friend, you're his confidant and finds himself often going to you if ever he needed advice, or needed to vent about his stress. He really isn't vocal but when he's confiding in you, his words spill out of his mouth usually sealed tightly just steadily flows, his big strong Capo veneer falls apart in front of you but he doesn't necessarily feel unsafe by being vulnerable. That's how he trusts you. - No one will dare to bad mouth you in front of the Capo, or else there'd be hell to pay for. I mean, teasing is fine, he knows you can handle burns from team mates here and there (and will silently smirk at it) but he will not stand it if they attempt to belittle you for something unreasonable. "Watch your mouth. That was

out of their control, stop blaming them for something they can't do." - The type of friend that doesn't know how to comfort someone, but will try their best. So as you spill your heart out, tears, snot, sweat and all, he'll just pull you to his chest and awkwardly pat your shoulders to get you calm and comforted. Not to mention, he is extremely stiff at the hug and is very unsure what words to say to you to not upset or offend you any further, so he'll just ride it out smoothly, and let you let it all out on his chest. It's not like he can't wash your tears, snot and sweat on his chest anyways. - Since he is very non-vocal, he's a good listener so rant all the way! Complain about the weather, about your lack of love life, about how underpaid the hitmen team is, anything! He won't find the perfect response, so he'll just nod along and perhaps comment occasionally on what your saying. "So like, ugh, I am soooo frustrated at how Prosciutto could say that to Pesci! He makes a good point, but it's redundant for him to be too harsh on him! Look, all I'm saying is, maybe Prosciutto should start choosing his words correctly so that Pesci won't feel too upset! You know???" You glanced at your friend, as he simply sat attentively beside you. He nods silently as a response. "Anyways—" - Extremely great at deduction and the way he reads people so easily is so unreal. And so he uses this to his advantage to know what's up with you whenever you seemed off. By this, he's able to tell whenever you're upset but scared to talk about it, frustrated but too busy to talk about, etc etc. And with this, he takes the time to drag you to take a seat, and talk about what's been bothering you. If you don't wish to talk about it at all, he'll let you be after with a reassurance that you can overcome whatever the heck you're going through. - Everyone is surprised that you two aren't married??? That you're just friends??? The way you two look just makes you two look like a couple and it boggles the others how you two aren't one.

[storiesforallfandoms]

accident prone ~ machine gun kelly

word count: 1500

request?: yes!

“Hi love! Can I request something for Colson Baker where you’re like a college student who’s shadowing at a hospital and colson has to come in because he was stupid and injured himself on set for a music video and he flirts with you?”

description: on her first day of doing actual hands on learning, she ends up meeting a celebrity

pairing: machine gun kelly x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist (one, two)

After years of all nighters, stressful exams, and more procrastination than I care to admit, I was finally taking a giant step forward in my life towards my career: I was starting my first day as an intern at the hospital.

I knew it wasn’t going to be an easy job, I had been warned of this basically once a week since I had started school, but all I wanted to do was help people however I could. Plus, I had a strong stomach, so the gore would never affect me at least.

I tried not to seem too excited as I was assigned a nurse to follow for the day and given my list of tasks. Luckily, though, my mentor for the day seemed very sweet and understanding of my excitement, unlike some of the other mentor nurses.

I had just sat down for the first time in hours when my pager began to beep. I raced to find my mentor, who was stood outside of a room with the windows covered.

“How do you feel about practicing your stitches and bandaging, kid?” she asked as I approached.

“I haven’t done much of either yet,” I responded. “Should I really be practicing on a patient?”

“You can on this one. He’s a regular.”

I stepped into the room and immediately understood why the windows were covered. Sat on the able in front of me, cradling his hand in a blood stained cloth while trying to also hold a cloth to his bloody nose, was none other than Machine Gun Kelly.

“I was wondering where Diane went,” he commented, referring to my mentor. “You must be the new girl.”

“One of many,” I confirmed. “I’m (Y/N). You’re familiar with this place I take it.”

“I’d say I’m accident prone, but that’d be an understatement,” he responded.

I pulled on my surgical gloves and gestured to his hand. “Let me see the damage then.”

He held out his hand to me and I saw the giant gash on his palm. I started by cleaning the area, causing him to flinch slightly. He showed not an ounce of pain as I began to carefully stitch his hand.

“So, how did you manage to do this?” I asked.

“I may have been playing with knives,” he responded. I gave him a quick look before turning back to his hand. “I grabbed it by the blade without realizing.”

“You definitely cut it deep,” I told him. “Did that have anything to do with your nose?”

He shook his head, but paused as he did. “Maybe. One of my friends and I were fighting and he punched me in the nose. I reached for the knife to try to throw it at him.”

I looked back up at him with wide eyes. “You tried to throw a knife at your friend?!”

“I thought it was a fake one!” he tried to defend himself. “We were filming a music video with fake pocket knives and one of them was placed on the props table next to someone’s real pocket knife. I went to pick it up to throw it thinking it was fake and I ended up grabbing the blade of the real one instead.”

I shook my head at him and continued his stitches. “Why was there a real, open pocket knife next to a fake one?”

“I don’t know, man, someone took it out and left it I guess. Shit happens.”

I knew very little about Machine Gun Kelly. His music wasn’t exactly the type I listened to, but hearing him talking about fighting with his friends and throwing knives as if it were no big deal really told me all I had to know about him.

I finished his stitches and went to wrap the wound in some gaze. “Do I need to explain the healing process for stitches to you?”

“No,” he responded. “I’ve been told quite a few times.”

“I’d imagine.” When I finished with his hand, I gestured to his nose. “Does that need to be looked at, too?”

“I think it’s okay. He didn’t break it, just made it bleed a little.”

“I’ll look at it anyways, just to be sure.”

I took the cloth from his hand and put a hand under his chin to tilt his head back slightly. It certainly didn’t look broken, and I didn’t think he would need an x-ray to make sure. I’d ask Diane about it before he left just to be sure, but everything looked fine.

“I’ll clean you up,” I told him. I crossed over to the nearby sink and wet down a cloth with warm water.

“You don’t have to do that,” he said.

“Yeah, but I’m going to. Might as well, I have a feeling it won’t go over well if you walk out of here with blood pooling down your nose.”

He chuckled as I took his chin in my hand again and began cleaning the mostly dried blood off of his nose. I tried to be as gentle as possible, making sure that if he did have anything wrong that I didn’t irritate it more.

As I cleaned his nose, I noticed him gazing up at me. The windows pointing outside were open, and it was a beautiful sunny day. The sunlight came into the room and lit up his already bright blue eyes in the most beautiful way. I found myself trailing off from what I was doing to get lost in his eyes instead.

“Are you done?” he asked, giving me an amused look. For a moment, I thought he was referring to me staring into his eyes for so long, until I realized I was just resting the wet cloth against his nose.

“N-Not yet,” I stuttered.

I discarded the cloth into the nearby hamper once I finished and pulled off my surgical gloves to wash my hands. He stood from the table, stretching his body out from sitting around for so long. I had a feeling he was not a guy that was used to just sitting in one spot for too long.

“So, are you going to be here long?” he asked. “Just wondering if I should prepare to get acquainted with you or not.”

“Well, I don’t plan on leaving. I plan on staying here and becoming a nurse once my training is over,” I responded. “But I can’t promise you I’ll be the one looking after you all the time when you come in.”

“Maybe I’ll specifically request for you to look after me when I come in.”

I shot him a playful look over my shoulder. “What if I’m busy with another patient?”

“I can wait.”

I giggled at this, something that was very unlike me, but how can you not giggle when an incredibly hot rock star is (kind of?) flirting with you.

“I suppose I shouldn’t turn down patients,” I said. “It’ll literally keep me in a job.”

“Exactly! I could singlehandedly keep you employed all on my own, so you shouldn’t turn me away.”

I smiled at this and shook my head. “Well, we’ll see how things go. If you’re lucky, maybe I’ll become your nurse.”

I was about to head out the door, but his hand pushed the door closed, stopping me before I could. I turned to look at him, confused.

“Well,” he started, “maybe, just in case I can’t have you as my nurse again, we could exchange numbers and keep in touch that way.”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you trying to hit on me Machine Gun Kelly?”

“Colson,” he corrected. “That’s my real name, it’s Colson.”

“Colson,” I tried. The name felt right coming from my lips, and I could tell he thought the same because his face brightened when I said it. “Well, if you’d like to keep in touch, I suppose I could give you my number.”

Colson was so excited by my response that he nearly dropped his phone trying to get it from his pocket. I chuckled and took his phone, putting my name and number into his contacts and passing it back to him.

“Watch your stitches,” I warned him before finally walking out of the room.

I felt like I was floating on cloud nine as I walked to the receptionists desks, where some of the other nurses and training students were stood around talking. Diane noticed me first and immediately broke from her group.

“How did it go?” she asked.

“Went perfect!” I told her. “I stitched up his hand and checked his nose. No sign of breakage, and he seems to know how to deal with stitches.”

“He’s more stitch and tattoo than man at this point,” she joked. “Good on you, kid. That’s your first big patient in the bag.”

I looked over my shoulder to the room where I had left Colson and smiled to myself. My first patient definitely went better than I could’ve ever expected.

[dialovers-translations]

Diabolik Lovers DARK FATE ー Shuu [VAMPIRE ENDING]

ー The scene starts in front of Karlheinz’ castle

Yui: ( His answer...? )

Shuu: Basically you’ll quietly let yourself get killed?

Karlheinz: ...No.

I will kill you.

Shuu: !?

Yui: Shuu-san!!

( Karlheinz-san’s hand is reaching towards Shuu-san...! Don’t tell me he’ll actuallyーー! )

Shuu: Kuh...!

Yui: ...!!

*STAB*

Shuu: ...

...You never change.

Yui: ...Shuu-san...?

Karlheinz: ...Hah...

Yui: ( ...!! There’s a knife stabbed inside Karlheinz-san’s chest...! )

Karlheinz: Kuh...

*Thud*

Shuu: Like you did just now...You see right through my plans, always making sure you’re one step ahead.

Expecting me to follow in your footsteps is unreasonable. I simply had no other choice but to give up.

Karlheinz: That is exactly.... how those standing at the very top must be. It is how, you will guide your people down the right path...

Next....I must guide you. 

Shuu...In what lies ahead of you, you will surely be thrown into a state of disarray.

However, that is your...destiny. One which you could never escape, from the second you were born as my son...Your dark fate. (1)

However...You have already decided you will no longer run away, no? For the sake of those you wish to protect.

Shuu: ...Yeah.

Karlheinz: ...Perfect.

You have fully awakened as Adam. I shall give you my answer as well.

Shuu...You did more than a fine job trying to reach my level. And right now, you have even surpassed me. 

You, who has learnt how to love and feel, should now possess powers much greater than my own.

Go ahead, my son. Take my head...

The head of none other than the King. I am sure it will be useful to you in many ways...

Shuu: ...Ugh...

...Yui, close your eyes. You don’t have to see this.

Yui: ...No, me tooーー

Shuu: It’s fine.

In return...Whenever I will recall this moment in the future, please quietly stand by my side.

Yui: ...

...Okay.

ー Yui closes her eyes

Karlheinz: I’m leaving everyone in your care...

*CHOP*

Yui: ...!?

( What is going on...!? This overwhelming forceーー... )

( I can’t...I can’t endure it... )

ー She collapses

*Thud*

Shuu: Yui!?

ー The scene shifts to the garden

Ayato: ーー Take a look at the sky...

Kanato: Is that enormous magical energy...Father...?

Laito: ...It’s Shuu.

Subaru: He actually killed him...?

Reiji: ...!

Laito: Isn’t this for the best? To us Vampires, death is a blessing.

I’m sure he yearned for it as well.

Ayato: So he finally took his final breath? Well...He lived for long enough.

Laito: You’re being awfully optimistic, Ayato-kun. The King of Vampires just died, you know? Furthermore, the Vibora are without a leader right now as well.

Kanato: I can only imagine chaos will break loose in the Demon World. I’m sure there will be many wars as well.

Subaru: You’ve gotta be kiddin’ me...As if this place isn’t enough of a hellhole already...

Reiji: ...

Ayato: Oi, Reiji. Whatcha gonna do?

Reiji: ...Let us go meet Shuu.

There are a hundred and one things...I want to ask him, and say to him.

Laito: Let’s go pay our dear older brother a visit then.

Subaru: Cut it out, you’re makin’ me gag!

Reiji: ...Father...

*TIMESKIP*

Shuu: ーー Oi, Yui.

Yui: ...

ー Yui wakes up near the castle

Yui: ...Shuu...san...?

Shuu: ...You’ve regained consciousness, huh?

Yui: I...

Shuu: You had fainted. I assume from the magic energy.

Yui: Magic energy...?

Shuu: ...When the Old Man died, his power was let loose. You witnessed that right before your eyes.

His magic energy was the strongest of anyone in the Demon World. I guess a human simply couldn’t endure it. ...Are you okay?

Yui: Yes...

...How about you, are you alright?

Shuu: ...

...To be honest, I’m not quite sure myself yet.

Part of me regrets killing him, but at the same time, I also feel somewhat relieved.

Yui: ...Do you believe you made the wrong choice?

Shuu: I don’t know that either.

I never thought of him in terms of ‘like’ or ‘hate’ but...

Right now, I understand very well that my Father has always been an impactful figure in my life.

All in all, I might have actually viewed him as my family. For some reason, I feel as if I’ve lost a part of me...

Yui: Shuu-san...

*Meoooow*

Yui: Ehーー...?

*Meoooow*

Yui: Ririe!?

*Meoooow*

Yui: Ririe...!

Shuu: ...He was alive?

I figured he had died because we gave him that name but...I guess you weren’t that weak after all.

...Come here.

*Meoooow*

Shuu: Even when something is lost...Life goes on. That might be the true meaning of a family.

Haah...My list of things to protect just keeps on growing.

Yui: ...Will you protect us? Both me and Ririe?

Shuu: You’re still asking that now? Isn’t that what it means to be a family?

...I’ve made up my resolve. I will take responsibility. I will go head-to-head with my own destiny.

Yui: Shuu-san...

Ayato: ーー Oi, there they are!

Yui: You guys...! Is everything okay now?

Ayato: In what world? My whole body hurts like hell!

Laito: But I’m glad to see you safe as well, Bitch-chan.

Kanato: That being said...Where did that cat come from?

*Meoooow*

Yui: Ah...Ririe, you can’t! Come here.

Subaru: Ririe...?

Shuu: ...Shut it, you guys.

Where’s Reiji?

Reiji: I am present, right here.

ー Reiji walks up to him

Reiji: ...Shuu. Do you remember what I told you?

Shuu: The part about not forgiving me if I were to kill the Old Man?

Reiji: ...So you did kill Father after all. 

Shuu: Yeah.

Reiji: Did he have...any final words?

Shuu: He asked me to take good care of all of you.

That isn’t what brought forth this decision but...I’ll be playing his role from here on out.

Reiji: ...!

Kanato: You’ll ascend the throne?

Ayato: A sloth like yourself? ...For real?

Reiji: Are you saying...You will become the Vampire King?

Shuu: That’s what it’ll boil down to. The late King has died.

From here on out, I will lead the Clan of Vampires as their new King.

Yui: ( Shuu-san... )

Shuu: The Demon World is in disarray ever since what happened to the Vibora. Once the news of the Vampire King’s death hits the masses, it’ll only get worse.

After losing their leader, the Vibora were swiftly conquered by the Founders and lost their clan’s pride.

I can’t let the Vampires go down that same path. I won’t allow for that to happen.

I can’t let those guys...run loose forever.

Even if my struggle is in vain, I will fight till the bitter end.

We haven’t seen the last of this yet...

Ayato: ...But can you pull that off though? Us Vampires are already running low in numbers after the recent attack. 

Shuu: Of course, I don’t believe I can fix this all by myself.

I’ll obviously rely on you guys’ help as well. I won’t take no as an answer. As members of this family, you’ll follow my lead.

Laito: Good grief...Seems like we got ourselves another tyrant on our hands.

Shuu: Reiji. You’ll be my right-hand man. Lend me your strength as the second son of the Sakamaki household. Understood?

Reiji: ...

...I did not fathom a day would come on which I get to hear such a clear order from you.

Very well. For the sake of our family, and our clan, I shall do everything within my ability.

Yui: ( Reiji-san... )

Shuu: First we must retroop our people. Then we can move on to uniting them.

Reiji: You make it sound so easy.

Shuu: Of course, I don’t believe it’ll be a breeze. Therefore, first upーー Yui.

Yui: Eh? Yes?

( I wonder what he’s going to say? He’s staring right into my eyes... )

Shuu: I’ll marry her.

Yui: ...Eh?

Ayato: Hah?

Kanato: ...What are you saying?

Shuu: That’ll increase my prestige, no?

Subaru: You’re marryin’ her over that reason!? Don’t you feel bad for her!?

Shuu: Haah...Ridiculous. You really think I would go through all the trouble just for that?

I’m obviously marrying her out of love.

Yui: ...Shuu-san!?

Laito: Haah...I didn’t think I would hear those words come from Shuu’s mouth one day.

Kanato: Seems like he won’t even bother listening to Yui-san’s reply.

Shuu: Because I don’t need to. ...Right, Yui?

Yui: ...No fair...

Shuu: You’ve been stuck in this destiny with me since forever. You can no longer escape.

So you should make up your resolve as well.

Reiji: Haah...You decide such an important thing on the spot. I fear for the future...

Well, I suppose it is fine. Right now, we have something to celebrate first.

The birth of a New King, and his spouseーー 

*TIMESKIP*

Yui: ...I didn’t think I would one day get married in the Demon World.

Shuu: Really? I anticipated this.

I told you, didn’t I? That I was aware this moment would come one day.

You were naturally there as part of that imagination as well.

Yui: I...How should I know without you telling me?

Shuu: I’m not the type of guy who expresses himself with words. I’m pretty sure I told you that before as well?

Yui: Gosh...

*Meooow*

Yui: Ririe. Did you wake up?

*Meooow*

Yui: Fufu, come here.

On certain CGs, little black roses will appear on the screen. If you click on them, you get an extra line of dialogue.

“What? You think I look lovely in these clothes because it’s so different from my usual attire? ...Haha. Dare I say you don’t look half bad either?”

“I’ve had let alone time with you ever since this little guy came along. ...However, from here on out, you’ll always be only mine.”

Shuu: ...Don’t you think you spoil him a little bit too much?

Yui: You think so? Not as much as with you though...

Shuu: What do you mean?

Yui: I think I spoil you much more than I do Ririe.

Shuu: ...Hah, you tell me.

*Rustle*

Shuu: In that case, make it a little more obvious.

You always claim you don’t understand me but...Your behavior is confusing as well.

Yui: I-Is it...?

( I always thought I was pretty straight-forward...I wonder if that didn’t quite convey to him...? )

Shuu: Don’t look so anxious. ...It properly got through to me.

Yui: Ah...

*Meooow*

Shuu: You’ve made it more than clear that you love me ...Nn...

Yui: Nn...

Shuu: Nn...Haah...

Shuu: Haha...Now you are one of us as well.

Yui: Am I?

Shuu: Even if your body is human, you’ll marry the Vampire King, so I’m sure that will happen.

The King’s spouse is a human, huh? Well, I don’t think that’s such a bad thing?

...Yui.

Yui: Yes?

Shuu: Chaos still washes over the Demon World to this day. I can only imagine the war will get intense.

Yui: ...Yes. 

Shuu: As long as you stand by my side like this, you will surely get involved with this dark fate as well.

That must be rough as a woman, and a human on top of that. I can understand why you would rather turn a blind eye to it.

Yui: ...I’m prepared.

I’ve always stuck by your side, well aware that this would happen.

Shuu: Heh...I guess I worried for nothing.

Well, not that I was going to let you go either way.

Father was right. I...lose all meaning in life when you’re not with me.

Stay with me until death. I’ll protect you till that day.

Become my new family, and live by my side.

Yui: ...Yes.

Shuu: Then kiss me.

Yui: ...Where did that come from!?

Shuu: Just words aren’t enough. Promise it with your body as well. Come on...

Yui: Nn...

*Smooch*

Shuu: Hah...I really like this way much better than just mere words.

*Meooow*

Shuu: ...Don’t interfere. She belongs to me.

Yui: Oh come on, don’t compete with a cat.

Shuu: I guess every time we welcome a new member to our family, I’ll have to reconfirm that you’re mine.

Haah...I fear for the future. Having a family really is a drag after all.

Well, I guess I can live with it if they’re directly descended from you. 

Yui: ( Does he mean...? )

Shuu: From here on out, I’ll protect both you and my family with my own two hands.

To live alongside my precious family, and the woman I love...

Yui: ...Yes.

Shuu: ...We still haven’t said it, huh?

Yui: What exactly?

Shuu: The oath to become a family.

Komori Yui. I...love you.

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) Karlheinz drops this term in the general prologue as well. He says 闇の運命 or ‘yami no sadame’ which means ‘the law of the dark’. However, ‘sadame’ is written with the characters for ‘unmei’, which means ‘fate’ or ‘destiny’ instead of 定め.  

Within the DL franchise, ‘the dark’ is often used as a synonym for demons/those who live in the Demon World. For example, in HDB, the boys will often call themselves ‘yami no juumin’ or ‘residents of the dark’. Personally, I believe he implies that all Demons are born with a set path in life already drawn out for them and in Shuu’s case, it was his destiny to one day become Adam, kill his Father to inherit his powers and become the next Demon King.

[five-rivers]

DP/HP twin fic chapter 1

This would be the first chapter of that DP/HP twin fic...  I need a name for it before I post it elsewhere...  I can’t think of a name... help...  @ladylynse I blame you for this entirely.  It’s 3k and they haven’t even met yet.  What am I doing.

.

Here’s the thing.  Danny had encountered wizards before.  And witches.  Multiple times.  

He was not a fan.  

Burning, or other forms of murder, hadn’t ever crossed his mind as a solution to them, even when Freakshow decided to derail his life yet again.  Still. There were only so many times you could stumble upon members of a certain group zapping people with bargain-bin neuralyzers and leaving hours’ worth of uncertain memories in their wake before you got sort of fed up.  

Memory erasure was great in fiction.  Not so much in real life.  

Danny got it.  He’d erased a couple of memories himself.  Well, a lot of memories, depending on how one took the Reality Gauntlet incident.  But as far as motivations went, ‘trying not to be dissected by the government’ was a lot different from ‘we can’t be bothered to be discreet about our sporting events and we think it’s funny that our venue managed to attract ghost hunters when these magicless fools have never seen a real ghost in their lives so we’re going to mess with them.’  

Yeah.  Danny was still annoyed about that.  Also, about their reactions to him when he crossed an invisible line that was apparently supposed to repulse ‘no-majs.’  

That was before getting into Desiree, one of the few witches to become a proper ghost.  According to her, witches and wizards had a different system, and it was rare for magic users to enter the Infinite Realms.  Dora’s dragon amulet had also been enchanted prior to her death, although that could have been a ghost’s work, and Dora had never shared where it had come from.  

Anyway, the point was that Danny knew about magic as an entity separate from ghost powers and at least a small subset of the living beings that relied upon it.  

So, when the woman who dressed like she was living a century ago and smelled of magic walked up to his house, he’d braced himself for a fight.  He wasn’t going to let his parents be ‘obliviated’ again.  They were oblivious enough as it was!

But.  No. She’d come in, no wand in sight (although Danny still wasn’t entirely sure those were necessary) and sat down on the couch, hands primly folded, ignoring all of the… rather questionable features of the Fenton living room.  

To add to the weirdness, his parents had been expecting her.  They knew her by name.  They wanted Danny to be in the room to meet her.  

“Edna,” Jack said, with a strained smile.  “How have you been?”

“Well enough,” said Edna, her eyes flicking to where Danny stood in the kitchen door, watching. “And this must be young Deneb Alased, correct?”

“Yeah,” said Danny, frowning.  There weren’t a whole lot of people who knew his legal name, let alone his middle name.  So, who was this?  “I am.” He looked at his parents, willing them to clear up whatever this was.  

Both of their faces were sour, but they were trying to hide it.  Maddie was doing better than Jack.  

“This is Edna,” said Maddie.  “Why don’t you come and sit down, Danny?”  She patted the back of Jack’s favorite recliner.

Danny noticed how Edna’s mouth twitched down at his nickname. His fingers curled, ghost energy buzzing under his skin just barely kept from his eyes.  He didn’t like this.  

“It’s alright,” said Edna, smiling kindly.  “This must be very confusing for you.  I would be concerned myself, under these circumstances. What I’m about to tell you may be difficult to process, however.”

“We’d like to start it off, actually,” said Maddie. “When you called this morning—” She broke off, making a face.  “We were told this wouldn’t happen.”

“Yes, well,” said Edna.  She shrugged.  “Purebloods. What can you do?  Evidently—Well.  You should have your say, first.”

Danny gave Edna another suspicious glance.  Maybe all wizards weren’t bad.  Maybe Freakshow was an outlier and sports fans just sucked in general.

Yeah, honestly, that tracked.  (Cough, Vlad, cough, Dash, cough.)

He sat down.  “Okay,” he said.  “Way to be ominous.  What’s going on?”

“Well, Danno,” said Jack.  He laughed nervously.

“You’re adopted,” said Maddie, bluntly.

Danny blinked.  “Wait, what?” he said.  “Adopted?  But I look just like you guys!”

Jack’s nervous chuckles continued.  “We are related to your birth parents…  not closely, but…  Yes.”

“Oh my gosh,” said Danny, feeling several layers of personal identity float away from him.  He’d always blamed his weirdness on genetics and family history.  Especially the ghost stuff.  Then again, his name, which definitely did not match with his parents’ or sister’s, probably should have tipped him off.  “You’re serious?”

“I’m afraid so, Danny,” said Jack, kneeling by the chair and patting his knee.  “But don’t worry!  You’ll always be a Fenton, no matter what!”

Danny nodded, swallowing back emotion.  “And Jazz?  Is she…?”

“She’s adopted, too.  At about the same time as you, in fact,” said Maddie.  “So am I and Alicia.  It’s a long story.”

“Okay,” said Danny, determined to get that story at some point.  “Why is she here, then?”

“I was involved in your adoption,” she explained, “and certain members of your birth family want to get back in contact with you.”  

Ancients, that was sure a thing to hit a guy with right after the ‘you’re adopted’ revelation.  

Hold up.  He was forgetting something.  This was a witch.  How did that play into this?  Because it had to.  Witches and wizards, as far as Danny could tell, tended to isolate themselves from the rest of humanity.  

He decided he did not like the probable trajectory of this conversation.  

“Why?” he asked, because he wasn’t going to say he knew about magic until and unless someone else cracked first.  

“Yes,” said Maddie.  “Why?  Why now? We were under the impression that they would never contact us.”

“Evidently,” said Edna, “Deneb’s birth mother was not properly informed of the decision to put him up for adoption.”

Okay.  Yeah. That was a lead-in to his biological parents being magical because he couldn’t think of a single modern western country where that would fly.  

“So, what?  I was kidnapped at birth or something?” asked Danny.

“Not exactly,” said Edna, wincing.  “It was your birth father who filed the paperwork.”

“And she’s only now wondering where Danny is?” asked Maddie, a little shrilly.  Her stress from before was now spilling over into anger so sharp Danny could taste it like a knife on his tongue.  “Did she somehow manage to forget giving birth?”

“No,” said Edna.  “Which brings us to the other matter.  One of the other matters.  The one who first sent the request for your adoption information was actually your twin brother.”

A third monumental revelation.  Wonderful.  What next?

“We, of course, contacted his parents, and discovered the irregularity regarding your birth mother’s consent.  Hence my presence here today.”  She opened her bag and removed a small glass tube, about twice the length of Danny’s palm and the same diameter as a quarter.   “There was also the issue regarding how young you were when you were put up for adoption.  Generally, our agency deals with the placement of children aged from five to eleven.”  She held the tube out to Danny.  “Could you hold this, please?”

“Do you really need to do this?” asked Jack.  

“Due to all the irregularities involved, yes,” said Edna. “Our organization charter unfortunately requires it.  If the mother was not consulted, as is required, the reasoning is that other required things are not as certain.”

“Hold up,” said Danny, hands tightening around the ends of the armrests.  “These people—” Who were most probably wizards, and wasn’t that a thing to get his head around, “—they’re not trying to get custody of me again, are they? After giving me away?”

“No,” said Maddie.  “We won’t let that happen.”

“We’re not going to give him back to people who were going to abandon him just because—!”  Dad broke off.  “Uh. Because.”

Smooth.  

“You know,” said Danny, deciding to cut off… whatever this was. “Even if this ‘test’ is, like…” He trailed off.  “Whatever result you want it to be.  I don’t know.  I’m still going to find out whatever it is you’re dancing around anyway.  Because I’m not going to forget this conversation.”

Silence.  

The witch twitched slightly towards where Danny knew her wand was hidden.  

Screw it.  “And I’m not going to let you erase my memory.  You people do get how messed up that is, right?”

Danny was treated to the sound and sight of three jaws dropping open.  

“How do you-?” started Maddie.  

“You remember when we went to that camp because people thought it was haunted?  But you didn’t find anything?  Well, they managed to get both of you that time, but not me.  And I know you’re one of them, so I’m betting that whatever this is, it has to do with magic.”  He paused. “It was some weird magic sporting event, apparently.”

“The-?  You went to the Quidditch World Cup?” asked Edna.

“What?  No!” protested Maddie.  “That was in Britain, wasn’t it?  We were just in the next state.”  She scowled. “I’m going to write a letter of complaint.  Even if we’re living without magic, we’re not no-majs.  We’re squibs.  They had no right to obliviate us.”

“Okay,” said Danny.  “Yeah.  You’ve lost me.  Squibs?”

No one seemed willing to answer the question.  

“If you’d just take this,” said Edna, holding out the tube a little desperately.  “It will be much easier to explain all at once.”

Danny looked up at his parents.  Jack looked at Maddie.  Maddie drummed her fingers on the back of his chair.  

“It’ll be fine,” said Maddie, “probably.”

“Fine,” said Danny.  He took the tube.  Almost at once, it started glowing green.  

“Oh,” said Edna, frowning and leaning closer.  “It usually isn’t—”

The tube exploded, embedding several small glass shards in Danny’s hands.  

“Ow,” said Danny.  

“Oh,” said Edna again, evidently not registering the small splinter of glass in her cheek.  “Well. Whoever your birth father hired to test your magic as an infant obviously got it wrong.  Congratulations, Mr. Fenton.  You’re a wizard.”

“My hand is bleeding.”

“Yes,” agreed Edna.  “It isn’t supposed to explode, you see.”

.

Once Danny got cleaned up, which involved a lot of glaring at Edna from Maddie and Jack, they adjourned to the kitchen, which was free of random glass shards.  

“The adoption organization I work for,” said Edna, “places squibs—people born to magical parents who do not have magic themselves—with families of squibs.  Assuming the child’s birth parents do want to give up their child over something like not having magic.”  Her nose wrinkled.  “The common wisdom is that it is easier for such children to grow up in an environment that is not explicitly magical.  In any case, it is my personal belief that anyone who would give up a child over something like that isn’t going to be the best of parents.”

“Alright,” said Danny, “so… all of us are squibs.”

“Except you, apparently,” said Edna.  “It’s hard to tell whether or not someone as young as you were when you were given up will be magical or not.  Which is why we usually only deal with older children.  I don’t suppose you’ve noticed anything odd happening around yourself?  Or unusual abilities?”

Danny stared at her flatly for several long moments.  His entire life could be classified as ‘odd,’ and most of it he wasn’t about to share with Edna.  Or his parents, as much as he loved them.

But, on the other hand, he now had a great excuse for at least some of his weirdness.  His parents wouldn’t think ghost if they could think wizard first.

“Like, define ‘odd,’” said Danny.  Despite his earlier encounters with wizards, he had no idea what was normal for them.  Other than memory wiping.  Which he could not do and wouldn’t have demonstrated anyway.  

Okay.  If was actually a wizard, and Edna’s doohickey wasn’t just reacting to his ghostliness, he probably could learn how to do the memory thing, but he didn’t know now, so the distinction was meaningless.  

(Maybe being a wizard or a squib or whatever was why he wasn’t just.  Dead.)

(Yeah, he didn’t want to think about that.)

“Just…  Being in one place, and then a different place.  Surviving something you shouldn’t have been able to unscathed.  Things moving by themselves or changing color or size. Temperature changes.  Something you want very badly happening, even if it is impossible or extremely unlikely.”

“Okay,” said Danny.  “Yeah.”

“To which one?” asked Jack, concerned.  “I haven’t noticed anything like that except what the ghosts do.”

“Um,” said Danny.  “This?”  He put his hand down on the table, intending to leave an icy handprint.  That should be acceptable, right?  If temperature changes were normal…

His nerves got the best of him.  He knew he was nervous showing even one of his powers around his parents.  He overcompensated.  

The table was covered with frost.  

“Oops?” said Danny.  

All the blood had left Edna’s face.  Jack and Maddie didn’t look much better.  

“Dear lord,” said Edna.  “You can do that at will?”

“Yes,” said Danny, holding his hand close to his chest. “More or less.”

“Danny,” said Jack, “why didn’t you tell us?”

“I thought you’d think it was a ghost thing.  You kind of shoot first and ask questions later about ghost things.”

“Oh my god,” said Edna.  “Never mind that.  You can do wandless magic and you’re fourteen?”

“Fifteen,” said Danny, “but, yeah.  I guess.”

Evidently, this wasn’t normal.  

Also, his comment about shooting first hurt his parents’ feelings.  Go figure. Not like they weren’t keeping a massive secret.  

.

“So,” said Danny, once the other discussions had been shelved for the time being, “I have a brother?  I think a brother was, at some point, mentioned.”

“Yes,” said Edna.  “A twin brother.  He wants to meet you.  Along with your biological mother.”

“And if I don’t want to?” asked Danny.  “If I don’t want to have anything to do with them?”

“I don’t even know,” said Edna.  “I can’t believe you slipped under the national detection spell. There’s going to be so much paperwork involved in this.  International paperwork.”

“Huh?”

“You were born in Britain,” said Edna, as if this were a minor detail.  

Yeah.  Like his sense of self needed any further pummeling.  

“But it isn’t our fault everything is so messed up,” said Danny.  He maybe had some curiosity about his twin brother, but if there was any risk he’d be taken away…

“I understand,” said Edna, “but nothing like this has come up before, as far as we know.”  She sighed. “If it makes you feel better, I will use any influence I have in the matter to recommend that you retain custody of Deneb.  In the meantime…  Do you want to, uh, open communications with any members of your biological family?”

“I don’t know,” said Danny.  “Can I think about it?”

.

Relations in the Malfoy household had been strained ever since Draco’s investigation of his family tree (unrelated to the return of the Dark Lord and how blood purity was now much, much more important) had revealed that his twin brother had not, in fact, died at birth.  

And by strained, Draco meant that his parents had taken to living on opposite sides of the manor, interacting only when there were visitors.  Visitors such as his father’s Death Eater friends, members of society, and various government officials.  All of whom were more alike, and had greater overlap, than even Draco had initially suspected.  

This left Draco walking on eggshells between the two of them and wishing for Hogwarts to start again.  Anything he did to please one had to be entirely out of sight of the other, or else they began to fight again. ��Truthfully, Draco was more on his mother’s side, all things considered, but his father was the one with the friends, and Draco couldn’t stay home under his mother’s wings for all his life.  Like his dragon namesake, he had to fly.  

Which he would most certainly do.  Soon.  No, he wasn’t hiding from his parents in his room.  That would be ridiculous.  They knew where his room was.  They could find him if they wanted to, and neither of them was anywhere near him.  He knew.  He’d checked.

This made the inarticulate shriek of rage he overheard from his mother all the more concerning.  

It was enough to make him emerge – cautiously! – from his self-imposed exile.  

He was curious.  And stupid.  It got him into enough trouble at school, why not at home?

Also, he really needed to know.  For his own safety.  Tiptoeing around whatever disaster just happened would be impossible if he didn’t know what it was.  

Instead, he tiptoed after his mother.  

His mother, who was angry enough that sparks were coming off the end of her tightly gripped wand.  Green sparks.  

Draco had never actually seen the killing curse in action, but his mother’s face screamed murder all on its own, no magic required, despite the fact that Draco was only catching glimpses of it as she strode towards his father’s half of the house.  

This was going to be bad.  Terrible.  Possibly the kind of event that saw one of his parents in Azkaban and the other in little, tiny pieces all around the smoking room.  

Lucius, for his part, looked paralyzed where he stood, and Draco briefly entertained the notion that Narcissa had managed to cast petrificus totalis on him without moving her wand or speaking the words.

Narcissa planted herself firmly in front of Lucius and glared up at him, seething, her breath making sucking noises as it passed through her teeth.  

She punched Lucius in the face.  The man toppled, clutching his nose.  Narcissa kicked him.

It was a good thing that the Malfoys had no neighbors, because what Narcissa screamed next likely could have been heard for at least a mile.

“He wasn’t even a squib, you lying bastard!”