#also yes Jerry is trying out makeup and also gender stuff in this au

[cloistergardens]

[INT: Jerry Seinfeld’s apartment

JERRY is standing in his kitchen, holding a tube of pink lip gloss. He is peering at himself in his reflection on the refrigerator door, attempting to apply it.

KRAMER bursts into the apartment, slamming the door open and startling JERRY.]

KRAMER: Jerry, I just found out about this thing called neopronouns. They’re like pronouns, but they’re neo.

JERRY: …what?

KRAMER: So anyway, I’m gonna use xe/xyr pronouns now.

[KRAMER crosses over to JERRY and snatches the lip gloss out of his hand. Xe eyes up the color, then nods approvingly at JERRY.]

KRAMER: Hey, thanks!

[KRAMER exits the apartment as quickly as xe entered and slams the door closed on the way. JERRY stares after xyr before throwing his hands in the air, still holding the cap for the lip gloss.]