#also lemme know if you're seeing weird shit in the text lol

[ohthathurt]

I had this nagging idea about pickles that I couldn’t let go of, lmao enjoy x

Liam stretched quietly under the blanket; eyes still stubbornly shut and reached a hand out to the other side of the bed. He paused in his half-asleep state as his hand came into contact with empty, cold space.

He popped his eyes open and looked at the empty spot on the bed, frowning when he saw no one there. A quick glance towards the bathroom confirmed no one was there either. And the final nail: Rhino wasn’t at his usual spot at the end of their bed.

Ah, so what exactly was his husband up to at, he glanced at the clock, 3 am?

He fumbled out of the blanket and climbed off, fingers absent-mindedly scratching at the week-old stubble. He was taking a few days off and had decided to visit Zayn in New York, where the other man had newly purchased a flat. Liam had to help him christen the whole place, of course, he was only helping.

He stumbled out of their bedroom into the living area, finding it oddly dark, despite the light in the kitchen being on. A faint crunching and clinking noise was all he heard from their living room. He edged forward, hand scrabbling the wall for the light switch, and flicked it on. Orange light flooded the vast space and smack dab in the middle of it was Zayn. With his hand in a jar of pickles and Rhino asleep at his feet.

The best part about it all, was that his husband barely paused in his activity of consuming pickles straight from a jar; he looked at Liam with a blank expression and went straight back to crunching on his pickles. Rhino perked up at the sight of Liam and whined sympathetically. At least one living thing could understand his pain.

He didn’t know how long he stood there in amused shock, the crunching continued with the occasional snuffle from Rhino. Finally, he lurched forward not knowing how to react. A strong smell of vinegar now permeated the lounge as Liam stopped in front of where his husband sat, perched on a sofa.

Liam only raised his hands in puzzlement. Only Rhino reacted to him; jumping up onto his paws from his near-comatose state and nuzzled Liam’s knee affectionately. He got a few pats from Liam which is when Zayn finally spoke.

“You woke him up, now you put him back to bed.” His husband muttered, not taking his eyes off his beloved cucumber pickles.

Liam huffed, “I didn’t wake him up. Besides, you spoil him rotten. Next you’ll be asking me to read him a bedtime story.”

Zayn looked up with hopeful eyes, “Oh really? Would you? Thanks jaan.” He went back to licking his damned pickle and do pickles have to be so goddamn phallic?

“Oi! No fucking way I’m reading your baby a bedtime story. Do it yourself.” And with that, Liam threw himself down on the sofa beside Zayn, gleefully jarring his hold on the pickle.

With a pointed glare, Zayn continued like Liam hadn’t spoken, “Besides, he’s a Malik, he’s entitled to being spoiled rotten.” A coo was heard from his husband, directed at Rhino, and none of that was a surprise. He’d often hear Zayn doing the ‘baby talk’ to all their pets, but the man would deny it to his grave. Sap, Liam thought fondly.

“Well in that case, I’m a Malik too, why am I not spoiled rotten?” Liam crossed his arms and leaned his head back. It was too late for such useless conversations, but it’s how they’d always been, him and Zayn. Talking until after hours was their thing, ducking under blankets and giggling until the rest of the boys thumped on their bunks or hotel room walls.

Zayn reached down to boop Rhino, getting an excited grunt as a reply, “Silly Daddy, doesn’t he know you can’t spoil what is already rotten?”

It took Liam a total of 3 seconds to understand after which he slapped his husband with a reprimand. Zayn giggled in reply and went back to his pickle.

Liam finally addressed the issue. “Why are you eating pickles at 3am?”

Zayn shrugged, “Felt like it. Cravings or something.”

Liam paused, “Are you - ?”

He was cut off with a grin, “Been reading too much fanfiction, babe?” Liam stuck out his tongue in retaliation.

Liam sighed deeply, “Anyway, pickles always reminds me of 2011 and summers spent at Dani – “

He cut himself off with a startle, chancing a wary glance at his husband, who had paused with a dripping pickle in his hand, eyes downcast.

“Sorry, babe –“

Zayn shook his head jerkily, “Nah it’s in the past now, don’t worry. Besides got what I wanted, didn’t I?” He grinned sharply at Liam, waggling his eyebrows ridiculously.

Liam snorted, “Always so used to getting what you want. You stole me, admit it.” He teased Zayn but only got a bored expression from his husband in return.

“Wha’? Did I also steal your dick when it came into contact with mine?” Zayn raised his eyebrow in question. Liam sighed, shaking his head at the crass words, but he could tell he was blushing.

“And anyway,” Zayn continued, “Maliks mate for life, and you’re my bitch forever.” He ended that sentence with a loud snap of his teeth as he bit into the pickle with little remorse. Liam winced in sympathy for the pickle but snorted soon at the words.

“Alright, Mr. Otter, enough chit-chat, can we go back to bed soon?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

But Zayn ignored his question, and moved to give Liam his back, hands reaching across the sofa to clutch at his laptop. Thankfully, he was at least done with the pickles. Liam carefully picked up the now empty jar, setting it onto the coffee table and away from Rhino’s prying tongue.

He looked over his husband’s shoulder to look at what he was up to and found him on Youtube. Soon, words were being typed into the search bar and, hang on that name –

Liam jolted forward, hands on Zayn’s shoulders and tucked his chin into his neck. “What are you searching up her for?” He felt Zayn shrug in his tight grip. Liam loosened his hands and snaked them across Zayn’s waist, settling the other man back into his chest, his nose nuzzling into the space behind Zayn’s ears now and then.

He felt a deep rumble against his chest from Zayn’s back; dear god he was purring. Liam held in a laugh and looked at the laptop screen again. A video was playing and… She looked completely different, yet that voice was wholly nostalgic for him.

He smiled at his husband, “You just can’t let it go, can you? She was the one woman in my life you genuinely hated.” Liam laughed, but it was endearing how even after all these years, the one relationship with a woman that was real for him was the one that made Zayn the most jealous. It was sort of flattering.

Liam tightened his grip and turned their loose embrace into a hug, hiding his face in Zayn’s neck; eyes clenched shut and arms like a vice around his husband.

Zayn must have felt the emotion and intensity, because he only paused to give Liam a kiss on the forehead.

Liam heard a faint mumble, “I love you.” He smiled into his husband’s neck as his lips moved to answer him back. Zayn took a deep breath and as he let it out, he shut off his laptop and grabbed at Liam’s arms to let go.

He stood up and offered Liam a hand, before the two men wound their way back to the bedroom, Rhino trailing happily behind them.