#also if i tagged you pls don't feel pressured to do this <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[softodettes]

20 question for writers tag game

tagged by @siobhanbooks (thanks friend!)

1. Total number of ao3 works?

7 in total

2. Total ao3 word count

35,363 words

3. Fandoms I've written in

only The Empyrean so far!

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

my love is mine, all mine; your little hand's wrapped around my finger, it's so quiet in the world tonight; read it and weep; don't you ever grow up (to could stay this simple); and if i could give you the moon, i would give you the moon

5. Do I respond to comments?

yes. 100% yes. and i blush and giggle and kick my legs the whole time because everyone's always so sweet

6. What has the angstiest ending?

probably and if i could give you the moon, i would give you the moon because it's unrequited pining.

7. What has the happiest ending?

literally anything else that i've written LOL

8. Have I recieved hate?

no (do not take this as a sign to send me some, i am fragile)

9. Do I write smut? And what kind?

not officially, but i have a ton of smut that's written and just sitting in my notes app and some word docs... i'll work up the nerve to post them eventually.

10. Do I write crossovers?

not currently

11. Have I ever had a fic stolen?

no

12. Have I ever had a fic translated?

no

13. Have I ever co-written a fic?

no, but it sounds like fun

14. What is my all-time fave ship?

uhh idk? according to my ao3 bookmarks, it's zutura. but honestly, i'll read and ship anything, i'm not too particular.

15. A WIP I'll never finish

probably the violiaden smut/pwp that's like 1/3 written in my notes app, violiaden post-resson hurt/comfort, or an idea i had for a character study on mira and her signet. i want to think i'll finish them eventually, but i haven't really felt inspired to write them recently.

16. Writing strengths?

probably prose or introspection. i could go pages without writing a single word of dialogue.

17. Writing weaknesses?

dialogue. always dialogue. i read all of it aloud to myself and i feel like it's fine, but i really struggle with making each character's voice and dialogue sound unique. it's one of those things that's always going to be a work in progress for me.

18. Do I like foreign language dialogue?

i love reading it! there's a few Empyrean pics that include gaelic terms of endearment and i always love reading that. i think i'll probably end up including that in some of my own fics. but writing full sentences makes me nervous because grammar can be very nuanced and i'd hate to get it wrong.

19. First fandom I wrote for?

The Empyrean! i almost made the leap with The Last Kingdom in 2020, but The Empyrean world and how positive and nice everyone in the fandom is is what helped me make that leap a few months ago.

20. Favourite fic I've written?

probably either read it and weep or after resurrection. they're very different, but both of them are very near and dear to my heart: RIAW because it was one of the first times i felt happy and proud of what i wrote, and AR because it's very niche and just fun for me to write. i've learned a lot about myself writing it, and it's my first multichapter fic, so it holds a very special place in my heart. and don't you ever grow up is my first baby so it also holds a special place in my heart.

no pressure tags!: @taumoebaa @widebrimmedhatsblog @callsign-rogueone (liz i know you write on tumblr and not ao3 but you're still one of the writer homies 💗)

[in-the-starz]

thank you sm for the tag!! ur music taste is so good

my taste in music is very mixed but a few songs that come to mind rn (in no particular order):

1. Bragging Rights - Proper. (feat Willow Hawks)

2. Emily Orphan - Local News Legend

3. Bridezilla - Mommy Long Legs

4. Weapon of God - The Taxpayers

5. Vertigo Cave - The Used

@art--school--wannabe @glitterhoof @zook-x @glitzyglee

+ anyone else who'd like to add :)

RULES: When you get this you have to put 5 songs you actually listen to, then tag 10 people!!

tagged by @natscatorrcio thank youuuuu !!

these are from my on repeat playlist!

I, Carrion, (Icarian) - Hozier

get him back! - Olivia Rodrigo

Teen Idle - Marina

Honey - Samia

Even - Julien Baker

tagging: @lottieurl @lesbiantahani @reesesfastbreak @deankarolina @el-fandom-birb @misfittq um and anyone else that wants to share pls say i tagged you!!

[gortash-week]

hello gortash nation. it is i, host of this week @sankttealeaf here! gortash week may "officially" be over but that means nothing when the archduke wants more! (he will not stop until he has more, please i miss my family he's keeping me locked away in wyrms rock prison and is making me dance for his amusement! i cant dance! help please!!)

anyway - despite the event ending, i will be leaving the AO3 collection open until the end of august / early september for those who found the event a little later and want to make something for these prompts. time is a weird soup after all, we don't follow rules here!!

if you've made something and have thought "oh no! its not the day of the prompt anymore - i cant post it" PLEASE share it!! i'm still accepting submissions and i'll still reshare any gortash week work here & tag whichever day its for! i know some people found out about the event as it was happening and if the prompts have inspired you - please share!!! i'd love to see it!!

thank you from the bottom of my heart if you've participated in this event - whether that's making things or simply engaging with the content shared. it means the world to me that people found the prompts interesting enough to take time out of their day to make something for it. i had no idea this event would be as big as it's become and i'm so so so impressed with the wide variety of work made and shared!! everyone is so talented and i cant wait to see what other things you all make and write <3

as for the future? well, i'd love to run more events like this! i've mentioned before about a hypothetical "gort month" that would include two prompts per week, 8(ish) prompts in total. that way there's a loooot more time to work on things & if people wish to join halfway through it's a lot less pressure to do so! my aim for running events is to keep them as stress & pressure free as possible because theyre here to be fun! i'm also open to comments & ideas & feedback on how you (yes, you!) found this event so if i do end up running something else in the future it can be better and better! pls feel free to shoot me as ask (anon or not it's fine! be respectful though, that's all i ask<3) if you have any post-event comments you want to air and i'll respond!!

again, if i've missed any of your work you've posted, please send it my way! no message required, just drop me the link & i'll share it asap!! thank you to those who have done that already!! i easily miss things and i dont want anyone to feel like im purposefully leaving them out!!

thank you again for making this week so enjoyable! ive had such a blast hosting it and if i see any other events i'll be sure to reblog them here (for those interested: i've seen a wyllmancer week, a galemancer week (both on twitter), and a lae'zel week on here that i can't seem to find the post for to link to :( )

again - super open to comments and feedback or even if you just want to say hi! i'm way more active on my main blog if you're interested in hanging out there :3

thank u so much for this week, it's been so much fun <3 <3

[callistoscope]

a healthy venture

Summary: As most know, sexual experimentation is all apart of a healthy relationship! It just so happens to coincide with a very awkward relationship for a couple like Harvey and Clarice, however.

Pairing: Cringefail(Clarice) x Harvey. (if you know you know.)

Word Count: 7.4k. I know, it’s ridiculous.

Warnings: Smut, smut, smut. AWKWARD smut. Takes a hot minute to get there, but when it’s there, it is THERE. The sexual experimentation in question is PEGGING with not much else, so….

a/n: this is silly and very crackfic-adjacent but also So Serious to me. also, yeah I guess they’re in a relationship, but early stages? probably had sex before this? Idk, whatever makes the most sense. sorry if the writing style comes off kinda cringe sometimes!!! I really tried to connect the writing style to what I imagine cringefail’s thought process would be like. and it might generally come off more amateurish since it’s been a hot minute since I’ve written. have mercy pls I swear I was so much better at writing like a year ago I’m getting back into the swing of things </3. If you have no idea who cringefail is or why’s she being paired with Harvey, she’s from @clarisinne ‘s comic!!! check it out!!!!!!(peer pressuring you). also @cowboyweevil since u asked me to tag u!

——

Clarice will be the first to admit that her life is consistently in tatters, and more often than not, it's her own hand that tears up that life the most. She had never been the type to have a sturdy head atop her unsteady shoulders— more the type to awkwardly headbutt into every problem and success that dared to beseech her. Both intentionally and unintentionally, sometimes simultaneously.

One thing she does know, a tidbit of information carved so deep into the recesses of her mind that even dementia wouldn't rob her of this simple fact— her sister was a fucking menace.

Clarice could have given her sister some semblance of underserved grace, could have said she wasn't so bad, if only that's where her bad qualities stopped. But Mars's abhorrent behavior was made all the more pesky by how relentless she was.

Her sister was as relentless as the damn splinter still wedged into Clarice's foot, a recent injury she had been careful to make sure Harvey wasn't privy to.

Harvey.

This was all his fault, really. For such a highly respected doctor, for whom which his town had only the most upstanding of opinions of him, beholding him as kind and responsible, Clarice feels safe in saying that her health had went down a steep decline since the moment. . . this happened. Since the moment this strikingly warm, gooey feeling coagulated in her heart, not unlike that of a fatal blood clot. Her life is effectively cut in half from the amount of stress she's experience since moving to this town. Her life force is visibly draining away, day by day, she's sure.

And her darling sister has the nerve to kick her while she's already down. Escalating the gradual deterioration of Clarice's health like the terminal illness only Mars can be like.

Even now, her sister giggles behind her hand in midst the autumn wind, brimming with an audacity that makes Clarice seethe. She has to bite back the urge to chuck her full watering can at her.

Casually, her sister leans down to pluck a pumpkin from the ground, holding it proudly in her arms. A smile plays on her face, one Clarice does not like one bit. "You know... I've been thinking—"

"Stop doing that."

"I've been thinking—" she trots along, happy as a clam. Content as a mischievous cat might be more apt. "If Harvey doesn't step up more, you might really have to take the reins. In a way you don't expect."

Stubbornly, Clarice stays off to the side. She crosses her arms, clutching the watering can high up in protest. Her job this morning was to water whatever crops weren't already covered by their sprinklers, and she was feeling like her labor wasn't deserved the more this conversation carried on. Nothing of substance had been said yet, but Clarice's ears pick up on the lilt in her little sister's voice.

Said sister finally shoots her a cursory glance over her shoulder. "Really! I'm just trying to help you out!" The laughter in her voice says otherwise. "Because, honest to God, the more I think about it— the more plausible it becomes."

Clarice's eyes narrow, body tense in anticipation for the nearing punchline. "... What?" However hesitant, the word ebbs out all the same.

Clarice can see her sister's figure trembling already, frame wracked with inexplicable mirth, and she already wants to sink into the dirt. "Because—" she starts, unhelpfully, voice warbling, "I'm sorry, but that is the exact kind of man who'd wanna get pegged."

Mars's voice grows high-pitched, wavering, and the cackle she lets out would rival a witch. Clarice can hardly focus on that sound, her ears ringing so loud it blocks everything else. Pegging. What the fuck?

Her face grows hot, and it takes conscious effort to not pass out right onto the dirt ground. Whether it be from the thought alone or merely from the fact that her younger sister thought this made for acceptable conversation, Clarice can't be sure. Before Clarice can even hope to respond, the other is rattling off like she's finally been given an excuse to.

"And— and listen! I'm not judging! Good for Harvey! Good for you! As long as everything is safe, sane, and consensual, right?" She bites the words out a bit, trying not to laugh too hard, nearly dropping the pumpkin.

"Stop." Clarice chokes, half plea half threat, blood rushing through her ears. Her mind is fraying at the edges, her brain rotting in record time. She's just starting to stomp her way over to her bastard sister.

"All I'm saying is— I know an online shop that'll ship here, yeah? Sells strap-ons, and has good variety. Pretty quick, too! Poor Harvey won't have to wait very long."

Clarice's free hand just reaches up to claw at her scalp in mortified agony, freezing for one sickening moment. She's on the path to getting her bearings and cursing Mars out like she never has before. Her mind is just on the verge of rewiring itself into proper working order. Like most things in her life, however, Clarice's life never stops at one bad thing.

"Um."

Harvey's voice is small, but the effect it has on her body is not. Clarice's body goes stiff as a rod, and the awkwardly loud clearing of his throat finally coaxes her into snapping her head back to look at him. So hard that one of her braids whips against her throat. Harvey stays where he is, loitering around the entrance of the farm with an odd rigidity to his face.

Clarice's body proves untrustworthy, and the hand holding the watering can goes limp. It's the moment after the tepid metal slips from her fingers that the gravity of her mistake hits her.

It really does hit her— the hefty watering swishes loudly as it lands straight on her foot with the accuracy of an Olympic gymnast.

"Fuck!" Clarice all but howls, stumbling back and promptly tipping back onto the dirt with an equally pained shout. It's a hard fall that ends with her gaze blearily aimed up at the blue sky, her ears picking up the sounds of two pairs of shoes scuttling up their respective pathways.

Of course. Of course it was the foot she had the splinter in.

——

Of all the sexual escapades both her waking and unconscious mind liked to torture herself with by envisioning… Clarice will admit that pegging isn't one of them. Not to say that her thoughts are incapable of running along the more adventurous paths she catches herself pointedly trying to ignore, but it simply had never come up.

Until now, at the violation of her coveted free will, at her sister's hands. She wishes all the terrible things for Mars, sometimes.

And she really shouldn't be mulling over her sister's words seriously, but her mind is deliberately caught on the thought.

... How does Clarice even feel about the concept? Even vaguely, if she just distantly ponders over what exactly that would entail? Maybe she feels some sexual curiosity she'll get to sating one of these days, should Harvey give it the okay?

If Clarice lets her mind do more than skim over the topic, however... the honest reality of what such an activity would bring is enough for her to be content to shelf it out of sheer mortification, never to see the light of day. Harvey, as always, is a different case. Adds integers into the equation that forces Clarice to reconsider everything, to reach for a different conclusion she otherwise never would have. She's forced into growth with him, sickeningly enough.

More annoyingly, she's forced into tending to herself in areas where she usually would shrug and walk it off. As soon as the hard, metal, heavy watering can had crashed onto her foot, the strange tension dispersed throughout the farm had vaporized on Harvey's part. Harvey had been painfully normal to her for those few minutes. Fussing over her, taking her carefully by the arm and coaxing her into her own house, insisting he check her foot for any major damage.

Mars had the social grace to stay outside, and Clarice prays she has enough to feel ashamed. She's knocked out of that thought when Harvey cautiously presses down on the top of her foot, and she promptly hisses.

"Sorry, sorry," he says, mouth flitting to a little frown. Harvey looks up at her from where he's taken a knee in front of her to closely inspect her foot, those brown eyes of his more like puppy dog eyes. "Just want to make sure nothing's fractured." Despite his words, he presses down at a different area of her foot, and Clarice's leg twitches with the instinct to kick him.

Her mind continues to fluctuate between nauseating panic and increasing irritation at Harvey's continued poking and prodding. It all culminates when he leans back, seeming satisfied with his work, meeting her eyes another time.

Abruptly, his eyes widen and his gaze scatters back to the floor, and that's all the confirmation Clarice needs to know exactly what place Harvey's mind goes back to. She'd had hope he'd forgotten about it, but that hope is thoroughly dashed and thrown back to drown in the river.

"So. Um..." he trails back into silence just as rapidly as he starts to speak, a palpable tension fracturing any temporary peace that had settled. Harvey shuffles, a stiffness settling over his body that she notices. It's the soft blush that peeks over his ears that does Clarice in, an innocent seashell pink that makes her eyes dart to the opposite direction of the room in deflection. Her hands claw shakily at the leather of the couch.

"Listen... I know it's technically none of my business, and it wasn't exactly meant for my ears—" Harvey lets out a labored breath. From the corner of her eye, Clarice can see his head tilt up, before hesitantly bobbling back down. He seems torn on where he should be looking. "And, uh— I didn't exactly hear everything? So, uh..." he says, voice wavering at the end. Clarice chances a glance, only to see a bright red blooming over the slopes of his cheeks, hands clenching at the pant leg of the knee he's supporting his weight on.

"I'm really sorry if I'm misunderstanding, but... how exactly did that topic come up?" He squirms a little from where he's kneeling, as if even just saying such vague words wired a shot of adrenaline straight through his nervous system. Clarice can relate, even if she knows what he's feeling is infinitesimal compared to the amount of adrenaline coursing through her.

Steam might start coming out through her ears if her mind ponders on any of this any longer. "... My sister brought it up." she mumbles, voice strained. Clarice brings her hands up, rubbing her temples, her cheeks nearly scorching her palms. Apologies, insults directed at her sister, humiliated blubbering, all sit at the tip of her tongue, but she just can't manage it. It's more like there's a stone in her mouth, on the verge of suffocating her, and her lips feel dementedly stitched together. "She thought you'd— I don't know. You know." It feels like flames lick up her cheeks then, and she winces with grief at the bitter loss of normalcy regarding their relationship. Who is she kidding? That ship had long since passed.

"Ah," Harvey actually scratches at the back of his neck, and something about that makes her want to scream in pain. It's such a stereotypical display of anxiety, and it makes those gooey feelings spring up like unwanted weeds along the sidewalk of her heart. It's endearing, damn him. "So, you're not...?"

Harvey eyes trail back up, she can feel them on her body before she can see them. Her eyes meet his in quick succession, and she feels herself jolt as if she's touched a live wire. He himself seems a bit frozen in comparison, but there's a glint in his eyes. Eyebrows furrowed, looking uncertain yet decidedly... curious. Flustered and nervous, but not disgusted.

Clarice jolts again, eyes going wide, hands falling from her head. She probably tears a few red hairs out in the process, but doesn't have the presence of mind to care when her mind is racing a mile a minute. "Oh God, you are into it." she blurts, bewildered for a multitude of reasons.

Any bravado Harvey seems to have procured promptly breaks from under him, his head bowing down as he's left to pick up the pieces. "I didn't say that!" he insists shakily, sweeping a hand through his hair.

"It's just— if that was something you were into, I wanted to..." Harvey's voice dies, swiftly fishing his hand out of his hair. "I... didn't want you to feel ashamed about it, is all. Or like you couldn't talk to me about it." he finishes with an exhale, his face brimming with a vibrant red.

Clarice swallows, shifting on the couch with an antsy energy. "... How do you feel about it?" she forces out, more stiffly than she'd like. Her methods of communication were never as smooth or clear-cut as she envisioned. Moments like these only exacerbated that flaw. "You can... talk to me, too." She cringes. She sounds a little robotic.

Yet, Clarice had promised herself to try and be more... open, about any such topics with Harvey. To be considerate and hold his feelings with higher priority than following through on her track record and waving them away. Instead of regressing into the skittish fawn she is at heart and dashing away.

Harvey fidgets before slowly rising to his feet, face still red as a rose. "I haven't thought about it much, until now. But honestly, I don't feel negatively about it." Something shifts in his expression, fills his face with unyielding tension, and his eyes shyly flit to the other side of the room.

"Morbid curiosity is probably the most accurate emotion for what I'm feeling." It's said with a weight, as though he's confessing some grand sin to a noble higher priest. "It was clearly just meant to all be jokes, though, so the last thing I'd do is expect anything out of it! Not to say I even really want anything out of it."

She sucks in a deep, steadying breath.

"It's okay if you do." Clarice's face flames as soon as she dares to utter such words. She gestures awkwardly with her hands, body more akin to lifeless metal than flesh and blood. "Haha! Sex—" she chokes, abruptly restarting the sentence.

"Sexual— Sexual experimentation is just a part of a healthy relationship! And we're healthy!" Smiling tightly, the inflection of her voice comes out more manic, a little frantic. She bumps her elbow against him, harder than she means if the wince that stretches over Harvey's face has anything to say about it.

"And it's normal! We're normal, and we can do this! Right, doctor?" Clarice grits her teeth a little, elbowing him again, desperate.

"Y- Yeah! Hah, definitely!" Harvey laughs nervously, rubbing the side of his stomach. "But, we should probably discuss this more, if you're really being serious—"

"— Harvey," Her face is promptly buried in her hands, unable to even cast a glance in his direction. "I'm at my limit. Please."

Another anxious little laugh bubbles out of him, pulling at a loose thread hanging from his coat. "Of course. Yes, that's, whatever makes you comfortable. We can talk about this later."

——

The simple fact of the matter is that they do. It's a verbal scuttle that seesaws back into Clarice conversationally dragging her feet, as most conversation between them winds up being on her end. How Harvey puts up with it is beyond her— hell, Harvey himself is beyond her.

Kind, wonderful Harvey mystifies her as much as he begrudgingly enchants. He is some strange, glittering galaxy that perplexes her with his intent to be swept into her chaotic gravity. Terrifyingly considerate, practically falling over himself with every other word when he insists that they don't have to do this, he wants her to be comfortable, he only wants what she wants—

And... What does Clarice want? The question echoes in her mind, the answer echoing in kind.

To be sated.

This curiosity, it stifles her in its attempt to persuade her. It sits in her chest, leaves residue when it attempts to glue itself in her head. Clarice had waved it off, tried to ignore it, but the remains fester there. The rot of the idea is only fertilizer, and ultimately, it only grows. She's curious, and she's always been one to explore what springs that emotion in her. For the most part.

And when she finally wrings out that honesty out of herself, Harvey flusters, but moves with the natural pull that such a confession swings a conversation into: what now? What's the plan?

There's a list of questions that are steadily answered, ticked off the mental list she's sure Harvey had conjured up in his head. Where? Definitely your apartment, I'd kill you and myself if my sister heard. Okay. Uh, how would we get the... equipment? Ship it to your apartment. My sister would never let me live it down if she got even a hint of it.

Many similar questions and answers filtered out amongst them. Harvey makes some timid remark about doing his own personal research regarding how he should prepare himself, and the conversation is effectively capped off for a few weeks. It's the persistent elephant in the room, one that grows inexplicably bigger one day in later Autumn. Finally, after some surface level digging that more exposed how deeply it burdened Harvey's mind rather than exposed any real concern from Clarice, he admitted that that the equipment came. 'It,' he'd referred to it so aptly.

It. It came. There wasn't much more to plan than the main event itself. Not much more to do other than biting the bullet and doing it. With the grand exception being thinking about it, a crime which Clarice finds herself exuberantly guilty of. The last few weeks had given her heartburn, her thoughts becoming expertly nomadic in the way they traveled from normal and innocent to salient and crude. Stray thoughts that clustered rapidly in one great moment of imagination before popping and deflating like a balloon. Leaving her flustered in midst her daily chores, normalcy strained for the rest of the day.

What would Harvey say? What would he sound like, how would it feel? How would Clarice feel, really, to be the one giving in such a way?

She didn't have to wonder much longer. Even still, her curiosities still ring so loud in her head as she stands at the door of the clinic, heart running at such a magnitude that a hummingbird's would pale in comparison. She clutches her to go bag in an iron grip, the reason why she had a to go bag making her body all the hotter.

Clarice's mind whirrs when the door opens, and it doesn't stop until they reach Harvey's humble apartment towards the top, and even then, it only dulls. She isn't even sure what sort of pleasantries they exchanged, too strung up in her thoughts to be in anything other than on autopilot.

"We don't have to do this," Harvey drills the notion yet again into her head as he is bending down at the side of his bed, hand grasping blindly at the space under the bed frame. "Really. We could just sit in for a normal night. I wouldn't mind any."

Clarice gathers herself, though her efforts are futile when it's like trying to keep water in her hands. "I would." she bites out, sucking in a breath through her teeth with a whistling sound as she gracelessly lets her bag drop to the floor. "I want to. We're doing this." she says, surprising herself with the shaky, albeit no less sincere, conviction in her voice.

"... As long as, you know, you're still down with it." she falters, twiddling with the sleeve of her jacket absently. Her gaze returns to Harvey when she hears a sliding sound, like something being dragged across the floor.

"I am!" Harvey breathes, voice wavering. He isn't looking at her, instead looking at the box he'd apparently stashed under his bed. "... I just like to be sure about these sorts of things." He stands back up with the box in tow, presenting it to her as he steps closer and closer. His face is already flushing, though it's a soft dainty pink that she finds all too fitting on him.

As her gaze roves over the box, it is not a dainty pink that seizes her face. On the white box is an understandably crude picture of a dildo, a strap-on she thinks belatedly, with words in varying fonts spewed around it. Reviews, the technical name of this model, the brand. Interestingly enough, it seems Harvey bought a set, her eyes pick up. A strap-on and a harness.

It hits her all at once, and she makes a sound that is part laugh and part cry. She's incredulous, unable to conceive everything that is happening, the things that click into place. "God, you hid it? Under your bed?" she mumbles, the humor of the situation washing over her as she lets out a raspy laugh. Harvey, the highly respected doctor of Pelican Town, hiding a strap-on under his bed.

Harvey makes an affronted noise, though his voice trembles a little with laughter when he weakly replies, "Yes. It— I didn't have room for it in my drawer." Bashfully, he gestures to said drawer, the one next to his colossal bookcase.

Clarice snorts, and the tension eases. Where this is all going, where the current is taking them, doesn't seem so scary for a moment. Harvey smiles, still a little timid, and starts to open up one of the flaps of the box. "Is it really that funny?"

"I don't know. Probably not." Clarice admits in a weak voice of her own, swallowing as he moves back the layers of the box. It's one of those types, weirdly shiny and like plastic more than the traditional brown box. That tension fills back in slightly when her eyes catch sight of it. Well, not yet, it's in a protective pouch— but nothing can really hide the distinct shape that the fabric really only enhances.

It only takes a moment for Harvey to grasp it, holding it in a limp grip as he pointedly looks at the other contents of the box, ears tipped in red. "And, ah, hm," Awkwardly, he moves the pouch into the curve of his elbow, the back of his arm holding it against his body. His free arm fishes out the harness more preparedly, touching it less like a dead fish. "Here's... the harness."

It takes a moment to realize that he's holding it out to her, waiting for her to take it. Clarice shuffles with nervous energy, taking it and holding it stiffly away from her body. As if any making any further contact with it will scorch her. She already burns, and it's in the most humiliating way. An uncomfortable heat bread-crumbing its way lower and lower, with plenty of pauses. "Should I... put it on?"

Harvey makes a sound, lips parting as if to say something. They only close again, and she can see his Adam's apple bob as he swallows. He only nods, abruptly turning around. Only then does he find his voice. "Probably, yes."

Respectively, both parties begin to disrobe, Clarice starting with her shoes and socks and whittling away at the rest. A part of her tries to be neat about it, wants to be, but quickly loses that train of thought as soon as she has it. Anxiety gnaws at her the whole way through, until there's a messy pile of clothes sitting next to her and a weight in her chest. And the harness tightly in her grasp. Clarice rubs the fabric between thumb and forefinger curiously, sighing as she starts to journey of putting it on.

And a journey it is, anxiety quickly becoming secondary to the frustration that shuffles to the forefront of her mind. Trying to figure out what could be adjusted, how to hold certain parts of the harness while she slides it further up her body, it was a bit of a nightmare. Clarice adjusts the position of the O-ring when she's decently certain it's secure enough, pulling the adjustable straps against her body tighter afterwards just for extra security.

Clarice exhales a slow breath as she turns, wiping sweat from her brow. Only to find Harvey watching, naked from the waist down, his dark eyes a little wide and glazed, clutching the hem of his shirt. He jolts, hand fidgeting with the hem, as if unable to decide if he should take it off or not. "I'm so sorry, I just—"

"Were you staring at me?" Clarice asks, mortification budding at every nerve in her body in hot sparks.

"I wanted to make sure you weren't struggling with the harness!" Harvey says defensively, slipping his shirt off in one bold movement. "Because, if you were, I did look into it. I... should have mentioned that." His voice grows calm again, face ripening to more of a raspberry pink. Predictably, he folds his shirt up with practiced ease, almost more of a nervous tic than him actively wanting to.

Her eyes absently wander over his body, only to trail down harshly even at something as simple as the look of his bare chest. Clarice catches blurry snapshots at every other part of his body, but her mind is too scrambled to attempt to study the details.

"Should I..." she hears Harvey swallow this time, him almost making a gurgling noise at the back of his throat. "Should I get onto my back?" he continues, voice edging on squeaky.

"No," she blurts, shaking her head frenetically. She can't. There's many things she can do right now, is willing to, wants to do, but having Harvey on his back under her during this, helpless and pliant... she just can't do that right now. It stirs something in her, sure, something she may want to get to know more intimately in due time. Maybe. But not now. "I'm getting on my back. You're going to have to just— figure it out."

She hugs her body, wobbling over to his bed with the intention to plop down in a show of dominance, only to pause. The pouch lays on his bed, the fabric still doing absolutely nothing to disfigure the phallic shape. That's all it takes to make her sweat again, that anxiety of hers rising from its grave as she picks it up much like he had carried it previously. Underlining it all is that tailspin of anticipation, lying snugly under any negative emotions that threaten to impede the event.

"I mean you can just, you know," she stammers, eyes bulging at her own thoughts. "You know." Her eyes avoid him, digging her fingers into the opening and tugging it open, looking away when she grasps at the flared base. Clarice has no hope of keeping her eyes open as she slides it out of the silk, immediately fluttering closed just upon seeing purple. Prying her eyes back open, she forces a study session of sorts, discerning any texture she can make out by sight. It seems... smooth, not sculpted to be very indicative of an actual dick besides the base shape. More like an artist's under drawing.

Harvey is staring at it just as intently, with bated breath, hands clenching into fists. "That's okay, I can do that. I just, before that, I'll need to... prep myself. I can't just—" His hand lurches up to adjust his glasses shakily, that scarlet Harvey has been valiantly fighting off spilling on his cheeks like paint. "I-I need to use my fingers first."

Clarice's eyes aren't beckoned away from the toy at that, but her brain fizzles. It flickers and flames, a part of her screaming to watch and another pleading to cover her face the whole time. You'll never survive if you watch, it pleads.

"... Okay." she chokes, because what other response is there? "I'm also going to... prepare." Her voice sounds so small, even to her own ears. With a trembling hand, Clarice twists the toy in her grip, carefully holding the flared base awkwardly to her pelvis, trying to figure out how to thread the base into the O-ring. Harvey tries to pipe up helpfully, blabbering nervously about what to do, but shuts up when Clarice begs out, "Please shut up."

Harvey is fumbling with something, and once Clarice ensures the strap-on is slotted in correctly, she turns to see him drawing out a little bottle of what she can only assume is lube. He opens it in a diligent twist, coating his fingers quickly and wincing. She notes how he seems to focus on covering two fingers above all else, and that flame stirs again. More like a spark, hesitant but hungry for a chance to ignite.

She stiffly sits and lays on the bed, in such a way that her legs splay out over the side of the bed, soles of her feet touching the wood. Harvey passes the lube to her, pressing it to her stomach. "You're... You should probably use this, too." he says, face flushing a red that Clarice's own rushes to imitate. Harvey sits, but does not lay, in the same way she does. Except he props a leg up on the bed, spreading himself open, pressing that knee to his stomach as he settles next to her. She decides to be grateful she can't see anything from this angle, only his back, everything else too far in her peripheral to make anything particularly lewd out.

That gratitude is a fleeting present, for she is suddenly made intimately aware of the moment he must edge a finger into himself by the way his breath hitches. Clarice can't not notice, it's such a sharp sound that resonates in her ears— the leg up on the bed twitches. The bed creaks, and the spark ignites like a firework.

She brings a hand up to her mouth as her eyes betray her, her own thighs twitching with want for relief as she scours his back. Sees his shoulder blades flex when he must push in deep, loosen when he pulls out shallow. Harvey's very breath is trembling, his hips attempting to buck, but only succeeding in a meek roll with the way he's scrunched up.

"I'm so sorry if this is weird," he says, voice muffled and breathy. He must be covering his mouth with his free hand, too. Clarice can't say anything, especially not when he sighs as a tremor wracks through his body. His hips give another pitiful roll, his head lolling back for a brief second.

"H-Have you done this before?" she asks, perhaps too banally. It's just too practiced, he falls into each motion with too much ease. Experience. Her ears are reacting that way to sound again, any noise muted, as if underwater.

Harvey whines quietly, though the sound reeks more of humiliation than bliss. Clarice's body reacts the same regardless, shifting on the bed fruitlessly. She can feel herself pulsing, and she thinks she's gonna pass out if she focuses on that facet of this situation any more than she needs to.

"... Not before any of this came up. Just over the past few weeks." he manages shakily, "Just... just to see what I thought. To see if I liked it."

The bed creaks particularly loud with one swipe of his pelvis, and the sound he makes does sound more pleased. "Didn't want to make you go through any of this if I didn't even like it."

"... And you like it?"

Clarice buries her face in her hand then, when the silence stretches out a bit too long. Every part of her burns. Every nerve is roaring fire, and it's suffocating. What could even relieve her, she doesn't know.

"... Yeah. It was— it's nice." Harvey gasps out, a flurry of panicked breaths escaping him. He's trying to catch his breath, body going tense as wood. He tries to exhale, some other noise laden in it. "I think— I think I'm ready."

Harvey's arm looks disfigured as he moves it from this angle, the movement sputtering to a quickness that slows just as soon. His head tilts as he wipes sweat from his forehead with his free hand, seeming to completely pause. it's confirmed when he rests the other hand on his leg.

Her mind is caught in a constant loop of What do I do? and I don't know for a few seconds. For once, Clarice's body is dependable and rational, a hand grabbing for the small plastic bottle on her stomach. It's like all sentience has seeped out of her ears, her mind going blank as she pumps the strap-on absently, making the toy nice and slick. Apparently, she’s already poured it out on her hand.

The blankness in her head abruptly swirls into color, thoughts, visions, when Harvey turns his body. He gets onto his knees, ushering himself closer to her body, but not bridging any actual distance. His warm skin and body sit plainly out of reach.

Harvey hums plaintively, and Clarice can't even begin to explore what that could mean.

"You're really sure you're okay with this?"

A deep sigh reverberates throughout the room. Clarice leans back on the bed, pressing her hand harder against her face. "Yes," she groans out, agonized. "I'll tell you if I'm not feeling it."

Harvey lets out another heavy breath, though it sounds less burdened. "Alright. In that case then, I'll, uh, I need to..."

"Okay." Clarice says, high pitched, pulling her hand quickly away from the strap-on. It's weird, wearing this thing. She can feel the phantom sensations of where it tilts, now that her hand isn't there to direct it straight.

"Okay," Harvey echoes her, similar down straight to the tone, the almost squeaky way he says it. "I'll... try not to put too much of my weight on you."

"Thanks." Clarice merely whines, wilting into the mattress.

Harvey shuffles over, bed creaking with every new placement of his knees jutting into the bed. There's a moment where the anticipation builds, becomes something tangible and unbearably thick. The tension squeezes against itself, then loosens, like a heartbeat. Like it's a real, pulsing thing.

Harvey places a hand on the bed, around her side, gripping his covers tight as he murmurs apologies. Throws a leg over her waist as his other hand braces near the other side of her, releasing a shaky breath. He keeps himself up on his knees, looking down at himself and grasping at the strap-on feverishly by the base, holding it more in a line. Clarice doesn't know what expression he's making, what expression she's making, all too busy covering her face. Risking glances through the spaces of her fingers. It's all happening simultaneously too fast and tortuously slow.

"Alright," Harvey exhales, adjusting his knees one more time, face wrought with anticipation. "... Alright."

With a steady gaze downwards, Harvey slowly lowers his body down. He jolts as if struck with electricity when the tip presses against his rim, lips parting with a slow breath as he inches down further after a pause. There's a start of a whine in the back of his throat every time the strap-on slides in deeper, but he always staves it off. Always sucks in more air, and keeps going dutifully.

Harvey keeps to his promise and carefully holds himself up even as the strap-on fills him, an occasional shake winding from his face to his legs. Those dance aerobics classes seem to be paying off, in any case.

This seems to be one of the rare circumstances where Harvey is considerate of his boundaries and limits, hips undulating up and down with a careful air. It's a process he treats delicately, gives himself plenty of time to relax in between motions, and Clarice can appreciate that solely because he deserves to be treated gently. Even if she's horrible at doing it, he deserves that much. That sort of growth is something she owes him, one of these days.

That day will come, but today is a different one, a different milestone. Harvey doesn't contest these thoughts of hers, moaning softly once the gentle treatment becomes unnecessary. Unwanted, if the gradually increasing speed of his rhythm could have any thoughts on the matter.

Through the slits of trembling fingers, Clarice watches. Everything is magnified, all the emotions breaking some impossibly high dam despite the odds. There's shifts in Harvey's expression every time he effectively bounces, lips twitching with effort to keep himself quiet. Sweat glistens along his forehead and neck— he shines in the low lamplight that sits glowing only about a foot away.

The heat between her legs is unbearable. Clarice can't remember the last time she had gotten so wet and hadn't tended to herself. Hadn't been able to. It's humiliating, but that emotion is so weak and malleable in the current of pure arousal her body is getting lost in. Her head is foggy, yet her vision is vibrant with clarity, with Harvey.

Harvey, who's working himself down harder with every passing second. Instead of that lost, cloudy look catching in his eyes, he only looks all the more searching. Harvey sits back further on his heels, letting out a moan that sounds frustrated. Unthinkingly, Clarice's eyes glance downward at the dick between his legs. Straining and flushed against his abdomen, with him close enough that she can see the pearl of pre-cum beading at the very tip. It moves with every motion he makes. The bead drips over, trailing over every bump and ridge.

"... What's wrong?" Clarice dares to speak, voice containing a rasp that floors her.

"... I can't," Harvey whines, back arching as he sculpts his hips into a particular rocking motion. "I-I can't, I need—" he chokes, leaning far enough that he has to grind his hips forward and back more than up and down for the strap-on to stay inside.

Then he jolts at a particular thrust he implores, gasping sharply. His brown eyes go wide, glasses jumping with every movement that he makes, suddenly speeding up. "Oh! Oh, please, please—"

His thighs tremble with effort, and suddenly he's sliding right down. Harvey's weight presses right into her as he essentially sits on her lap, making her let out a grunt of surprise rather than one of any meaningful discomfort. He's straddling her completely, and the whimper he lets out is downright pitiful.

Harvey blinks with wet eyes, his eyes searching for hers, face twisted with embarrassment. Need laces it, need seems nestled into every frantic little movement Harvey attempts to make. Only for Harvey's body to slump back down, clearly too exhausted to keep doing all the work. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, but I can't— can you—?"

He suffers through the moment for air, face red as a strawberry, thighs still shaking even as he's seated. ".... Help me," he breathes, air whistling through his teeth a little. "Please."

The blood in her body is torn between two places. Clarice feels light-headed, her chest heaving for air she hadn't realized had dissipated. She's sweating before she's even doing anything, before she warily places her spare hand on his hip for support. Harvey groans with relief before she even properly helps him out. "Thank you, thank you." he chants.

He starts to move up again, more uninhibited thanks to the added momentum of Clarice's hand moving with him. Harvey lets out a hoarse cry when Clarice gathers enough courage to start rolling her hips up, meeting in a messy pace where neither is sure who should follow who.

Clarice shudders at the sudden increase in sounds, and more importantly, the volume. Face flaming, her mind wails to reprimand him in some way, to remind him of his neighbors who know him, but more importantly her. It's here where input and output scramble uselessly in the recesses of her brain. "Harvey! You— You need to quiet down." she hisses from her hand, on the cusp of a grand mistake. Her mind aims for swatting at his arm, but seeing as both hands are busy with equally important tasks, an easy pair of dots are connected.

Clarice raises her hand for a brief moment, smacking his ass lightly. Absently.

Harvey downright squeaks with shock, jerking on her lap. "I'm— I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

She could die right that moment, but thankfully, Harvey seems too out of it to make a comment on it. She cowers further into her hand all the same, body as hot as a furnace, eyes watering.

Clarice is just as quick to look through her fingers again, her other hand gripping his hip tightly, heart stopping in her chest when Harvey bites into his palm, muffling yet another cry. His eyes are lidded behind his glasses, breathing unsteady against his palm.

Harvey shakes his head, babbling around his hand as his body starts to tense up. "Clarice. Clarice. Feels good." His voice catches, bed creaking. An embarrassed pride stings her chest, hand clawing into his hip with her nails.

Despite the strain her voice, she forces what she knows he needs out. "You're doing so good, Harvey."

Harvey trembles, eyes squeezing shut, head tipping back. "... Clarice, 'm gonna..." he's nearly incoherent, too weak to keep riding the strap-on even with Clarice's guidance. Her moving hips seem to be enough to suffice, his teeth visibly digging deeper into his skin.

He blinks, once, then twice, then again, each one more rapid than the last. Harvey's body seizes, Clarice can feel it down to his thighs, his head bolting back forward. To her surprise, his other hand goes to cover the one holding his hip, his hips rolling in sporadic little bursts.

Harvey holds her hand to him tightly, dragging in one more ragged breath as the tension crests and drops with an abruptness entirely expected. He wheezes a little, sounding almost pained as his body quakes through the orgasm, cock twitching with little spurts.

All Clarice can do is watch with wide eyes, hiding them behind her hand again when it gets too much. All of this has been too much, really, but the feeling really implodes in the aftermath.

Soon enough, Harvey manages to haul his body to the spot next to her, sluggish and sated when he lets his body collapse. The bed squeaks in protest. Clarice's eyes burn more and more with unshed tears by the second, face hotter than the sun. She is half convinced that when she pulls her hand away, there will be burns staining her fingers and palm.

"Do you..." Harvey suddenly pipes up, lungs still audibly fighting for oxygen. "... want me to return the favor?" he asks, managing to sound as timid as he was breathless. "I mean, I know you didn't... finish." he coughs as quiet as a mouse.

Clarice makes a strangled sound, rolling on the side that turned her back to him. Tears spill out of her eyes, though she can't say any part of her regrets the experience. She's just... overwhelmed, mortified, and irritatingly horny. "No."

"Are you crying?" The bed dips as Harvey's voice pitches higher up in panic. "Oh, I'm so—"

"Harvey, it was hot," she sputters through tears, not giving him the chance to piss her off through his relentless apologies yet again. "Shut up. I'm just overwhelmed."

A hand tentatively reaches for her shoulder, Clarice's body tensing when she feels him stroke her shoulder assuringly. She hates him a little for it, hates it more when she actually relaxes.

It takes a moment of deliberate silence until the feeling soothes in her chest. Wiping away a few tears, she reluctantly rolls onto her other side, facing Harvey. “… Hi.” she says, voice a little muted.

“Hi.” The sentiment is mimicked easily, breathlessly, though he tacks a hesitant smile onto his flushed face. Clarice bursts into a giddy giggle for a reason she can’t quite pin down, giving him a watery smile. Harvey’s smile brightens, looking relieved. Some sexual exploration is healthy in the long run, she supposes, if it feels this freeing at the end.

[ineffabildaddy]

core of a clementine

i wrote a touch-starved crowley pov ficlet, here it is!!! explicit content incoming

-

Teach me to repair watches. Maybe I’ll forget the silken brush of your knuckles on my pebbled skin, stroking the place where my back meets my neck as you move to fasten my necklace.

Send me fruit-picking in the fields of Western Australia with the restless twenty-somethings. Maybe after six months, I'll struggle to recall the heel of your palm holding open a book, poised, imposing, steady.

Leave me behind a bar to pour endless pints. If I polish a thousand champagne flutes, then the press of your thumb into the core of a clementine may slip my mind entirely.

Bid me spin straw into gold on a loom. I might murder the memory of crying as I came, fucking myself on faltering fingers as if your digits graced my weeping cunt.

Put me to work with my hands and maybe I’ll learn to ignore yours.

Let me forget, too, how it feels to watch you plant a slice of cake on your wet tongue. How your lips cradle the stick of an ice lolly, how its juice drips down your proud chin, scarlet and vulgar.

Let me tilt my head back in the comfort of your armchair without picturing your mouth descending upon my throat. Let me crane my neck without craving your canines grazing my pulse points, as if you could pierce them and drain every drop of my blood.

My love would still be there, anyway. It lives in teeth and fingernails, it hangs heaviest where the blood isn't.

Do me a favour, stop scrunching up your nose. That way, I don't have to think about the tip of it catching on my clit if you were ever to taste me. Don't pinch the bridge of it, either, or I can't help but wonder whether you would tweak my nipples between your fingers and growl if I rode your face.

Turn away from me before you splay your hands out on the lower half of your torso. Then my brain won't silently have to plead, won't beseech you to press your belly into the concave of my back and fuck me mean, fuck me like it serves me right, serves me right for everything.

Don't spread your legs in the passenger seat of my car, love. Don't flex your thighs, don't shift the weight of your cock like it's sacred. Don't bring me to the point of talking myself down from swerving to the side of the road, don't force me to contemplate leaving the engine on while I climb over the gearstick and slick my parted lips with spit, waiting for you to feed me your length.

Don't tap your foot once you've grown impatient. Don't bring to mind how it might feel to sit on your knee, to roll my hips on the solid plate of it until I'm soaked and hard and lightheaded with want.

Don't speak in a whisper, darling. Don't mumble, don't murmur. Afterwards, I might dream of you telling me softly that I'm good, and then calling me a whore immediately afterwards.

I might wake up and think this means I love you. And we can't have that, can we, angel?

-

if you liked this fic, pls go give it some love on ao3!!! thoughts and reblogs here are also much appreciated<3

this work is a gift for @voluptatiscausa <3

i know a lot of the legends have read this already so i’ll tag a few who haven’t (no pressure!!!): @crowleys-bentley-and-plants @sabotage-on-mercury @greenthena @amagnificentobsession @crowleyholmes @alwaystuesday @and-his-hands-were-24-crows @iammyownproblematicfave @portraitofalonelydyke

[blvccl]

WELCOME TO MY BLOG !!

-

“what can i call you?”

i go by charlie or jeremy! idm nicknames, you can also call me by my username <3

“what are your pronouns?”

he/fizz works just fine!! don't feel pressured to use my neos, and please DONT use they/them on me!

“what fandoms are you in?”

literally anything that has slimecicle in it. also horror

“can you draw something for me?”

i usually open my ask box whenever i feel like drawing people's requests so yeah! go ahead and submit ur oc whenever my ask box is open

“can i commission you?”

YES. PLEASE OH GOD PLEAZE COMMISSION ME I NEED MONEY ANY PRICE IS FINE I WILL DRAW ANYTHING U WANT PLSSSS!!!!!!!! dm me for more info!

“can i draw you fanart of your ocs/aus?”

ABSOLUTELY!!! I WOULD LOVE TO SEE IT <33

“where can i find you?”

i have discord, ponytown, tiktok, bluesky, and insta! all usernames are blvccl!

“can i use your art for pfp/edits?”

yes! pls credit me!

-

INTERACT: fans of my interests, cool artists, slimecicle freaks

DO NOT INTERACT: MINORS !!!, bigots, terfs, zoophiles, antis of my ships/interests, meanies, problematic mcyt fans, vivzieshit media fans, etc!!

-

strawpage: https://blvccl.straw.page

prns page:

discord server: https://discord.com/invite/3qW5K4bfFy

COMMISSION INFO:

i will draw: sfw, cool stuff, anything that isnt in "i will not draw", suggestive stuff

i will not draw: heavy nsfw, heavy gore, anything vivziepop related, problematic mcyt, uncool stuff

tag: #jer's slmccl rants

[z-v06instance]

" NO ONE HOME, BUT THE VOID IS LOUD " a z-v06 (pressure, roblox) ask blog

you've been in blacksite long enough to confidently say you know how this place works. you learn more and more with every painful retry of the same mission: gather the crystal. so, yes, you can confidently say you understand this place, that you know how each of the creatures that lurk the halls of blacksite function. or so you think, for in front of you sits an open locker. you've seen these lockers, infested and plagued by that sickly darkness that you can feel the gaze of lingering on you. it preys upon the ones who are more idiotic than others; the ones who see its eyes and still run to it for safety. you've seen this before - you've seen all of this before. you've looked the void in the eyes, and it has felt like death. yet here you are, looking the open locker in the eyes, waiting for the suction cups of those octopus-like tentacles to latch onto you and pull you in. yet it does not try to grab you. it does not try to harm you. it simply watches you. for the first time you call out to the void. the void answers back.

for your first visit to this blog, it is recommended that you look under the cut. please note: currently this blog is on an indefinite hiatus. i apologise.

" THE VOID BREAKS US, THEN RESHAPES US. " the following sections are ooc ;; dividers by @/saradika

📼 ⎯ hey hey heyy welcome to my lil rp askblog :3 this is like. my first askblog in 5-6 years im rusty as fuck n barely remember shit. 🎬 ⎯ im the mun, itris, but haley works too! after seeing all the pressure askblogs pop up i decided to be a so called "free thinker" and make one myself. 📼 ⎯ how old am i? what's my main? what are my pronouns? what are you, a cop? i'm not tellin' you that! (all jokes aside, i only feel comfortable answerin one of these: just use it/its or ey/em!) 🎬 ⎯ considering there's like jack shit regarding the lore of the void-mass puddles (afaik), a lot of this blog will be headcanon heavy! (..mun is also neurodivergant and that may slip through so mun is sorry if it does. muse is not intended to be neurodivergant) 📼 ⎯ english is not my first language and i have dislexia so. im so sorry if shit i say doesn't make sense or my spelling is wackers 🙏 i also make up words sometimes without realising it. i am so sorry 🎬 ⎯ i dont usually use tonetags, so ask me if you need me to clarify my tone! 📼 ⎯ aaalright i think this is enough rambling. ya think it's time for us to hop onto the actual muse info?

" PLEASE, PULL ME FROM THE VOID. " this section is about the askblog. it includes muse info, rules, and anything i think is neceserry.

* buckle in, this section may be long. as if this entire thing wasnt already longer than i intended...

BLOG INFO

🌌 ⎯ this blog will contain profanity and mentions of canon typical death/violence. other possibly triggering topics may come up along the way, so please, view this blog with caution. feel free to ask me to tag things. 🔮 ⎯ please, and i mean PLEASE, no sexual stuff (i know why some of you people like tentacles). mun isnt interested in rp-ing that. the only exception are sexual jokes as long as they don't go too far. threaten to fuck the void's mom if you want! (i am not going to question how you'd be able to do that) 🌌 ⎯ ANY interaction is fine by me! feel free to interact as any muse, whether that be an oc, another pressure character, or someone from a whole other fandom! 🔮 ⎯ feel free to claim any anons and ill make a special tag for you (if you aren't on anon ill give you one too)! i may forget to tag some posts tho so if i ever do just. lemme know LMFAO 😭 🌌 ⎯ if im uncomfortable with an ask, ill delete it. but honestly there's not really much that im against. 'nd also lemme know if i ever do somethin that makes ya uncomfortable too!! 🔮 ⎯ unless stated otherwise, anyone who sends an ask will be treated as an expendable ! :3 actually on the topic of asks pls make it clear if ur ask is towards me and not the z-v06 instance otherwise ill answer ic 😭 🌌 ⎯ im alright w/ m!a's i fucking LOVE m!a's 👍 🔮 ⎯ if i randomly stop posting one day assume the void got me.

MUSE INFO [written ic, but not as the z-v06 instance]

🔮 ⎯ this instance of z-v06 answers to anything you use to refer to it. it has no sense of identity, therefore does not have a name or pronouns. it is up to you to call it whatever you'd like. though, i'm not sure if it has the ability to care. ...note to self, see if the verbal z-v06 instance is capable of emotions and feelings. 🌌 ⎯ fascinating.. the instance you've stumbled upon appears to be showing no signs of hostility. though, i'm sure that, just like the rest of the monsters that roam blacksite, if you provoke it, it may become more violent. 🔮 ⎯ it seems to be capable of remembering things you tell it. perhaps it can remember faces too.. 🌌 ⎯ not much else can be said. i suppose you'll have to interact with it in order to find out more about it.

TAGS

( OOC )⠀ ⠀||⠀ MUN HALEY ( ANON )⠀ ⠀||⠀ UNNAMED (^ the "unnamed" will be replaced by the anon name if there is one provided) ( BLOG )⠀ ⠀||⠀ [INSERT WHATEVER BLOG NAME HERE] ( IC )⠀ ⠀||⠀ WITHIN THE VOID WE ARE UNDONE ( ASK ANSWERED )⠀ ⠀||⠀ THE VOID ANSWERS BACK

tws will be tagged as 'tw [triggering thing]'

i prolly forgot some tag ideas or whatever the word is tbh so expect this to be edited 👍

LAST EDITED: 17TH SEPTEMBER 2024

[t-lostinworlds]

hello! gosh, i honestly have no idea what else to do anymore. i've been such a huge ball of anxiety these pass few days and i feel like i've got no other choice ://

so, enrollment for the next semester is this Monday (in 4 days), and idk why my school decided to do it during this time when most ppl don't get paid until the last day of the month/next month. as if that isn't enough, enrollments are also on a time limit and now that we get to decide our own schedules, it's also a race on who gets the subjects first. and if you can't pay for a percentage of the tuition fee upfront, you're going to get delisted so you have to pick your subjects again. the later you enroll, the fewer timeslots. so i could end up having a 6-9pm which isn't safe for me in this city especially when i commute alone. even worse, our tuition for this semester is much higher for some reason and we weren't warned about it.

i can't ask for financial aid from my school yet bc it's required to have at least finished 1 year before you're able to. i'm still trying to look for student/personal loan options bc most i've seen so far require a monthly that i just can't afford rn and it only covers 1 term instead of a whole year so it's not really that sustainable :(( (i don't live in the US btw so it's not a "start paying when you graduate" thing. taking out a loan means i still need to pay monthly while in school on top of other expenses, which as you can imagine, feels more like a burden than it is helpful.) i've also tried looking for scholarships but most only support stem/business courses bc this country isn't nice to artists so that sucks.

i honestly have very little money saved and with the sudden increase in tuition, it's hard to cover half of it even with my parents' help. and again, nobody is getting paid until next month so money is already tight as is with it being the end of th month.

so long story short, i need some help. the first installment for the fee (converted from my currency) is about $600. BUT. NO PRESSURE. i'm only asking those who have extra to spare. and any and all amounts are welcome. it's already going to be such a huge help. hell, even just a simple reblog to boost this already helps a ton.

but also, my commissions are open! so if u want to have a lil story in exchange for just a tiny bit of help, that'd be great too <3

here's my kofi and my pypl

again, no pressure! even a smallest amount already helps a lot. and also, pls do reblog to boost. i really appreciate you! i hope you're having a wonderful day <3 don't forget to take care of yourself too. sending you wonderful people love always ❤️

tagging some mutuals under the cut for a boost bc sometimes this doesn't show up in the tags anymore (but also you don't have too!! you can ignore this if u want alskalks)

@selfcarecap @hollandsmoose @shellshocklove @tanaka-drew @agaritas @userholland @thecodyexpress @annab-nana @hollandweather @annathesillyfriend @cumholland @jasntodds @quethekillerqueen @worldoftom (ily guys, i hope you're all safe and well ❤️)

[mecachrome]

wahh thank u @scrappyracers for the tag i enjoyed ur answers a lot :') f1 tag game...

Who is your favorite driver?: i am an oscarybro first & foremost <3 he's the only driver i truly rep because honestly i don't think i have the bandwidth for more even if i wanted to/tried!!

Do you have other favorite drivers?: i would basically put alex below oscar in his own little tier and then it's just like [WALL]... but i'm also fond of yuki + lando + lewis and respekt maxv :') the rest of the grid i honestly don't think about 99% of the time LOL not in a bad way but because i barely have enough energy for My Guys as is u know

Who is your least favorite driver?: 😔 i feel bad sharing hateurisms on my family friendly blog. 

Do you pull for drivers or do you like teams as well?: def drivers first but i genuinely like mclaren as a racing outfit so that helps!!! when oscar was still in alp i suffered so much because of it being a deeply unserious team and even back then when the cracks were still forming this was fairly evident because i had a rossi agenda, so i was like wegghhhh i guess i can enjoy a williams stint/swallow down alpine content for him. 😔 and then he replaced [answer to question above which at the time hindered my mcl support significantly] and i got the ultimate driver pairing at a team i'm actually quite fond of ❤️🤍🖤

If you like teams, what team do you pull for?: any1 else papayapilled??? 🧡

How long have you been into F1?: a little over 2 years!!! how i managed to get into this sport via an inactive reserve driver i don't know.....

What got you into F1?: several friends were getting into it & were reading mxl fic & things of that nature and even though i wasn't really invested in any of the ships presented i ended up biting as well... but fsr i was not compelled by most f1 content / barely watched dts and instead got reeaaally into feeder series, i think perhaps because at the time i was fascinated by prospect projections + mapping / modeling career trajectories + the idea of "ceilings" in hockey and was watching a ton of jr hockey so it kind of translated over and i got to enjoy masterclasses like litr the most broken broadcast streams ever of kimi driving off into the distance in adac f4. But anyway... i also watched chasing the dream and became obsessed with oscar from that and the rest was history 😌🐨🧡

Do you enjoy Fanfic/RPF?: i definitely read it!!! RPF Is Fine etc. i've written 2 effwon fics very poorly and that's it but i peruse the 814 archives regularly..... i forever need to be better at commenting and feel very bad about my own shyness but i think this fandom has such a wealth of incred authors whom i am always in awe of x__x 🧡 tho i will say i'm also a stickler for the 4th wall and it mildly horrifies me that 814 are 75% public..... also fun fact 814 is my favorite oscar ship but it's only my #3 lando ship LOL. j(e|o)ndo you are so special 2 meee

How do you view new fans?: well i'm a relatively new fan so 💗 honestly i barely witness or process most fandom discourse wrt: gatekeeping the sport or dts fans or what have you since i do not frequent those circles of the internet (no public twitter / have never downloaded tiktok in my life) so i don't even know the primary arguments!!

If you could take over as team principal for any team, who would it be and why?: i should never be put in charge of anything. now i'm just trying to think strategically like okay where would i want to live but even then i have no idea... 

Are your friends and family into F1 as well?: my family could not care less but def the former !!! 💗 going to my 2nd gp soon with my beloved chirlie friend who has been with me thru k-pop fandom for like 8 years now hehe

Are you open to talking to other fans/making friends?: yes i'm just very shy & have multiple anxiety disorders Amongst other things so pls forgive my neuroticism 😭😭😭 but i love 2 have discussions.... oscar piastri lore is my passion in fact <3

0 pressure tagging @bright-and-burning @piastrisms @miamimaiden @goingxmissing If u would like !!! these r fun qs i like hearing about people's fandom journeys/experiences hehe :')

[tiar-vn]

[ well first times jitters are back again at full force lolz , but at least it's less time this time ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ oh well ]

ooo first thing , Yaki is so pretty to look at (๑´>᎑<)~* + i really do like the art ❤︎❤︎❤︎

a q would be ,,, um ,,, fanart ? [ this is a normal q that peep ask ,,, right ? or do peeps just do it without asking (ᵕ—ᴗ—) , but i guess i'll ask before doing that ^^ ] + pls don't feel the need to say yes on this if u don't want to ^^

another q + it could just be me not really reading rightly [ or my off comprehension of English ], but ,,, um ,,, what does " his [ Yaki ] hair is a bit handy " mean ? i am very confused (ᵕ—ᴗ—) [ but it could just be me ]

either way , i hope everything'll go fine with this ^^ + hoping that i'm not putting any pressure or anything ^^ [ only saying that since i have no clue if i am or not (ᴗ_ ᴗ。) + super sorry if i am ]

signing off, "E"

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! Yaki was really fun to design, and I'm very glad people are starting to like him sobsob it makes me MORE than happy!!

Regarding fanarts; people can of course make fanart of Yaki or other future characters!! DO KEEP IN MIND TO NOT CHANGE HIS COLOR PALETTE N SUCH!! I would be ECSTATIC to see Yaki in other people's artstyle!??!?

You can tag the blog when u make fanart and also use the tag #tiarfanart🐍 (I just made this on the spot HAHAHA)!! Thank you again for asking and making sure<3

What I mean by "handy" is that his hair tends to like curl ALOT when he goes to sleep, normally when he lets his hair down, it goes in all directions and... ITS NOT REALLY A PLEASANT SIGHT TO SEE?? at least not for him since he's the high priest of the convent. So he keeps it in a ponytail!! It looks decent enough haha

HOPE I WAS CLEAR ENOUGH!!

[graceofgondor]

i saw your tags and... what are your thoughts on film théoden pls share!

Hi omg thank you for asking! It's been a minute since I've read the books so bear with me haha but I'll try my best to explain.

For me at least, it seems apparent that Theoden in the book is a humble king, he's not all that proud or greedy like many of the other ones. His role is essentially some form of peacemaker, he has no problem with Rohan's alliance with Gondor and doesn't hold Denethor's stewardship (or the long-dead history of the West Fold for that matter) against them.

Now while I don't have anything against film Theoden, I think he's definitely one of the characters whose book-to-film differences are overlooked the most. While he loves his family very dearly and evidently cares for his people, there is very much a sense of pride there especially when it comes to being at Gondor's aid, let alone taking advice from someone like Aragorn, who regardless of being an heir, seemingly can only sway Theoden with reason if at all. (Hence "Theoden not Aragorn is king of Rohan") And in this, it seems he was written as more of an ignorant ruler in some capacity despite being just, in order to naturally shine some light on Aragorn's leadership skills and create a more significant arc for him— which, in my opinion, fell a bit flat in the books by comparison. And I could get into Aragorn in the books vs the movies but I won't because that is a different conversation entirely.

The glaringly obvious difference of course is his relationship dynamic with Merry in the books is moreso handed over to Eowyn in the films. While I actually like this change (simply because it makes their relationship stronger and his death more meaningful) I can see how Merry would become a sort of second image of Theodred, and Merry's self-worth and character arc naturally going into that as well. I like how in the films Theoden wanted so badly for Eowyn to be happy because that was somewhat present in the book, but it was really emphasized in the films that her being a lady, as well as being strong, did not have to replace her happiness.

What I do like about Theoden in the film, is obviously his emotion and strife, and his willingness to do what he deems best for his people (even if it isn't always right I actually like that he makes mistakes). Also, Peter Jackson evidently took the time to highlight these mistakes and his self-identity/the weight of his responsibility being a more prominent aspect of his character, which I really liked too. Especially because in the fatherly sense, we don't really get to see much of that aspect of The War Of The Ring, how Sauron is ripping families apart and putting so much pressure onto rulers and such, but I especially like how we get to see that on a very deep and personal level with Theoden, because that is one thing I think the book did not possess, and while it is certainly different and definitely not perfect, I do actually appreciate it.

That's basically it! I actually love answering questions like this so if anyone would like to know more of my silly thoughts feel free to drop it in the ib <3

[lokiina]

WIP whenever~

So I know I got tagged a bit ago by @pinkyjulien and recently by @cybersteal (there may have been a few more I missed dfkjghdfg)

AIGHT. It's not super informative cuz I been working too much, trying to move and had to travel recently for a funeral. So brain's been a moving a lil slow and needs a break... BUT:

Mods:

I have a billion things on the go at any given time. It's like, questionable on when some will get finished. But I do have a silly Prop coming soon. So be on the look out for that. No preview or hints cuz it's intended to be a surprise. But I've been giggling a lot at it in the background.

Writing:

I'm a horrendously slow writer and I work in lil bursts but I've been working a bit more on adding to my lil blip I've thrown together on ao3 for Zayn and Dino. So maybe a lil chapter 3 will be up soon.

As poor lil demisexual Zayn has started to malfunction not knowing what to do with sudden feels he doesn't usually experience. Zayn.exe has stopped responding 👀 But also possibly featuring a very pissed off Dino too.

Art:

I've been def trying to do a lil more art as well, even if it means doing things really really slow in the background. I keep pondering the possibility of offering some form of commission maybe with my lil cartoony style like this cuz I'm pretty good at plopping those things out at a decent pace if I don't try to overkill details. 😂

I wanna be able to get myself a good gaming chair for the new place so I can have something better for me than a shitty kitchen chair and flattened cushion. So the money would probs go to that if I do.

tagging; I haven't been on here enough to see who's done shit recently so if you already did pls ignore. Also never any pressure anyway. @dreamskug, @arcandoria, @lucky38-2077, @chooh2, @a-pirate, @sammysilverdyne Also whom ever else might wanna take part, you can consider this a tag. 😘

[emily-prentits]

tagged by @crime-wives <33

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

59! (one of which is actually not mine, but it's been passed off to me so i can write the ending. its a long story)

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

170,144 (I DONT WANNA TALK ABOUT IT 😭)

3. what fandoms do you write for?

at the moment i'm a little all over! i have wips for grey's anatomy, silk comics, and the 2019 carmen sandiego reboot.

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Dance With Me - 326 kudos (Carmen Sandiego)

lately she's undressing for revenge - 298 kudos (Grey's Anatomy)

used to think loving meant a painful chase (but you're right here now, and I think you'll stay) - 250 kudos (Grey's Anatomy)

all the cuddles are for you - 222 kudos (Carmen Sandiego)

kissing you (again and again and again) - 199 kudos (Killing Eve)

5. do you respond to comments?

i try to! and i always get around to it eventually, unless it's a comment asking me to update etc otherwise it's not worth my time or energy.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

you're gone (and I'm all alone) for sure. the first and only time i've written main character death (so far).

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uhh. i don't do a lot of that. but if i had to pick from my sparse collection, i'd say You Are In Love :) short and sweet and ridiculously fluffy. my love letter to meddison <3

8. do you get hate on fics?

i don't think so! i don't write for gigantic fandoms, so the people that read my fics are usually too glad to have a new fic to nitpick my writing lmaoo. and honestly if i did i don't remember, so it clearly wasn't that important to me. shrug emoji

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

yep! as for what kind... well. i'll write anything if i have a strong enough vision and motivation lol. even in my one multi, there's a vast range of stuff. i'm always open to explore!

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written?

i don't write crossovers, personally i don't care for them, unless aus count.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope :) and if someone tries it i will make their online life a living hell :)

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

nope!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

yeah! i've co-written twice so far: burning (this is not a love story) with @which-star and it was intentional with @jackie-shitposts :))

14. what's your all time favourite ship?

thats a tough one 😭 but i'd have to go with silkcat from marvel comics. literally who is doing every dynamic so well like they do (no one is)

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oh so many. SO many. including but not limited to: meddison season 18/19 neighbor au, meddison bloomington au, and are you mine? (i'm not quite yours). its exhausting having all these ideas and no motivation to write them :(

16. what are your writing strengths?

i'm told that i write complex/angsty feelings really well! and i'm glad i do lol because why is my brain like this if not to be a storyteller

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

little movements. i love them and need them. they kill me.

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i'm open to it! i'm not fluent in any languages other than english, but i could probably string together some sentences in spanish if i tried (don't ask me about my latin abilities, pls and ty.)

19. first fandom you wrote for?

the 2019 carmen sandiego reboot on netflix! that show got me into writing and is also how i met my partners :)

20. favorite fic you've written?

oh boy you're making me choose 😭 i'll say that revenge is my top 1 SO FAR. second and third is tied between intrigue (hold your breath). and already yours. these three are some of the only fics i've written that i like enough to reread.

no pressure tagging: @walshies @which-star @lisascumslut78 @itsdappleagain @peridotglimmer @sucker-for-emily-prentiss and any other writers that want to! i always forget which of my mutuals write when im tagged in stuff like this. whoops

[cryingatships]

When you get this you have to answer with 5 of your fav songs and then tag your mutuals to do the same :) (no pressure <3)

Tagged by @buddhamethods, @zimmbzon, and @valentinaonthemoon, thank youuu!! Pls pretend i'm not replying a decade and a half late 🥹🥹

This is going to be a list of 5 songs I'm listening to these days, cause I literally cannot choose my all time favs, that list won't ever exist XD

SO! (in no particular order)

■ Fade - Jeff Satur Idk, there's something about Jeff's voice that's hypnotising. And it helps me concentrate when I'm writing. Idk why I don't make the rules ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

■ Ghost - Jeff Satur

Like I said, I don't make the rules. His voice is just so soothing and also makes me wanna cry from feels sometimes

■ Invisible Love - Nut Supanat

This man not only looks pretty, acts pretty, but also has such a gorgeously pretty voice. I'm still not reconciled with what happened in the series btw, so I'll just drown my sorrows in his voice

■ DILF - Badmixy

I don't even know what to say?? The mv is so iconic, amazing, stunning, show-stopping, dazzling etc etc. No srsly, this is probably gonna be my top 10 songs of 2024 list and we're only in february

■ ลั่นทม (Plumeria) - Cocktail

Yeah, I mostly like soft, floaty, vibe-y songs. This one is esp good at bringing out the Feels. And it also sounds a lot like the old songs in my own language so there's that bit of nostalgia too 😭

BONUS!! (cause when have I ever stopped at the set number lmfao)

■ Love You Still (abcdefu romantic version) - Tyler Shaw

Again, this helps me write sooo!! Also I love the lyrics, always makes me smile a lil :)

■ Wind - Chimon Wachirawit (the name jajajaja)

I've listened to this wayyy too many times to not include it here. Chimon should sing more if you ask me u.u

Oki, I'll stop now. Thanks for tagging me!! Even if I'm like a century late in responding, I promise I absolutely adore being tagged (✿◡‿◡)

Tagging my Triage-buddy @acingthecounts and all my moots who wanna to join in! (But I think all of bl-tumblr has done this already T^T)

[prythianpages]

ACOTAR Tag Game

Thank you for the tag! @ninthcircleofprythian (you tagged my main but I'll post it on here <3 I also promise I didn't just copy & paste, we just have very similar minds bc I agreed with you on most of these lol)

Answer the questions below & tag whoever you want, or make it an open tag!!

Who's your favourite ACOTAR character?

Do I have to pick? It's so hard! But since I'm in my Eris era, I'll go with him rn.

Who's your least favourite character?

It's between Mor or Amren. Idk, I just don't really vibe with them as much.

Say something nice about your least favourite character.

I did like that Amren gave Feyre that ruby or jewelry to give her the courage to go back to the prison. That was sweet of her 🥹 & Mor for taking Feyre away from Spring.

Who's your favourite High Lord? (If you picked one for your fav character, then who's your second fav!)

It's also Helion. He seems like such a good time (; like mans has the best library in prythian and glorious thighs??? c'mon now

Favourite MINOR character?

The Suriel. I loooooove gossip and would literally just summon them for the tea.

Favourite ship? (Crackships included!)

Azris hehe. They'd be so hot together.

Favourite court and why?

This is hard to answer when SJM hasn't given us much info about other courts 😭 So I think I'd have to pick Summer Court because I love the ocean and if there are mermaids, it's over for me there. I love them!

Make up a brand new court RIGHT NOW, NO PREP JUST VIBES.

OOhh! Umm...idk what I would name it but it would be nice if there was a court inspired by Dia De Los Muertos/ Day of the Dead. Like an underworld type of court where the High Lord/Lady there can helping the souls of prythian after they die and somehow it's associated with Starfall. Marigold Court? idk lol Like I said lame name but cool concept.

What relationship would you have wanted to see more of in the books?

Honestly, I would sell my soul for a pre-ACOTAR book that focuses on the Bat Boy friendship. Like when Cas mentioned waking up naked with some decoration around him? And Az hiccuping when drunk?? I NEED to know more.

What's your unpopular opinion?

Idek if this is unpopular but I do feel for Tamlin. He did fuck up but given other characters have also fucked up, I really hope he gets a redemption arc or is able to pick himself up. Like dude is really going through it and so are his people, someone pls save Spring I also kinda wished Amren had stayed dead. I don't hate her character but it felt too good to be true when both her and Rhys died and then they came back to life. It would've had more impact if one of them stayed dead.

What's your favourite headcanon/fan canon?

Right now? These body headcannons from @readychilledwine

If you were to be swept away to Prythian, what's ONE thing you would want to do?

I would want to experience Starfall with the IC. I love looking at the sky, especially stars and the moon and with all those hotties? Sign me tf up.

If you could have ONE faerie ability seen in the books, which would it be?

I would love to control water! Blame my mermaid fascination & h2O tv show addiction for this haha. But also making water wolves sounds so cool.

no pressure tags: @stormhearty, @daycourtofficial, @milswrites, @sarawritestories, @sillysillygoose444,

@acotarxreader, @pit-and-the-pen, @lady-of-tearshed

[writingforfishes]

worm non-hic-related-ask spam era (because they are nothing if a dorky fanperson at heart who would rather absorb lore than do anything productive irl)

otto n atty are fairly masc presenting

i want to explore that

so i think it's safe to assume that otto, being a cis guy, was raised/socialized as one. and as mentioned it wasn't safe for him to explore the side of him that wasn't heteronormative while he was at home. and when living with mark he didn't seem to behave much differently. did otto ever want to explore femininity (don't correct if that's misspelt i will die) or androgyny? or at least, did that ever cross his mind? benefit of not assigning them to live in a particular region/city/etc, there is the option of them living in a rly queer area and not having to worry abt any weird discrimanatory (discriminatory?) shi in public. if he wanted to behave or present differently, how would that look for him?

similar vein with atty. *pushes up glasses in intersex nerdism* i won't assume that atticus having had top surgery, being on T, and (presumably) possessing a not-dick equates to them having been raised as a girl. like that certainly makes sense but isn't the only way that things can go. if they were tho, they probably already have some experience and opinion of acting/presenting fem, and have obviously explored androgyny & masculinity. do they prefer either of those over fem? would something feel off to them if they wore, like, a dress or something, even if they were still being perceived as and addressed with the correct gender/pronouns? they seem like they would have uh...how do i word this. they have the vibes of being fashionable but not in a trend-following way? like when not asleep or in gremlin-writing-mode, i get the impression they generally wear clothes a step or two above casual/street stuff, but not like a complicated 10+ articles outfit, just a few nice-looking things that they're rly good at putting together and pulling off. they're like a quick-witted, dapper little guy. the gentlethem of all time (in the absence of social anxiety and introvertedness, lol, cuz like same). that whole long fashion bit to say: they seem like they'd be interested in testing fancy outfits in general (emphasis on testing and not always wearing, cuz textile sensitivity is a bitch), and enjoying all forms of clothes makes for a lot more options than trad-masc. idk

this stems from er. the characters i just created for my ~original work hicfics~ both have painted nails and a few different piercings or other jewelries/accessories each. and my brain was like wait a damn minute..would ottocus do anything more than wedding rings? (pls don't say dog tag chains istg) so like what are their individual experiences/thoughts with what society has decided as not-masculinity and if either of them were to experiment with such presentations on their own/with their partner, how would that go?

and if this is like a rly out of left field question u don't gotta deep-dive into it or anythin. idw like pressure u into world-building on the spot ehe...just, uh, if you do already have some form of an answer for this, i would be very interested to hear it :3

sry i just thought of a sillier (hella unhinged) question. feel free to virtually bonk me for this one. so the two of them also don't swear much. idk if that's like an age thing, a you thing, or if they as characters simply prefer not to, but. what do they think abt queer slurs. like the ones they can say. i think if the opportunity arises that atticus deserves to drop one british-cigarette-slang as a treat. ok umm. here u and your bois can have some strawberries or somethin. and i will stop (for today) being cringe now bye

We're gonna do the paragraph-by-paragraph thing again because I can keep track of it better in my brain. |P=paragraph.

|P 1

(after "I want to explore that.")

I honestly think Otto was a marching band nerd or a theatre kid? I might be borrowing too much from the source actor on that. I feel like he was a pretty energized person in his youth (ADHD/-tism?). After being kicked out of the house and in college he probably did express himself in more alternative ways. I hadn't given it that much thought, but I could see him being a neo-90's hippie with a guitar, long hair, and nail polish. Kind of a selfish douche but it's because he was someone who was never allowed to be himself. (And alcohol makes you super douche-y, too.)

He was probably a Philosophy or Religion major (never completed). Super smart but extremely insecure which turned into extreme egoism which was worsened by his drinking to deal with his anxiety and over-activity. I can see him being kind of an asshole and wearing a dress as a lark, but I can also see him wearing something like a broomstick skirt and a t-shirt and sandals. There's a couple of paths I can see him having taken stylistically. I can even see him going into a punk or goth phase at some point, though briefly and pretty quickly snuffed out by his mom.

Ultimately, I think neo 90's hippie dude playing a guitar under a tree in a long skirt with painted fingernails rings truer than all of the other possibilities.

|P 2

Atticus was absolutely raised as a girl. I'm confirming that now. But I like the inclusive thought of intersex individuals. Thank you for including it.

CW: gendered discussion ahead highlighting societal and cultural definitions of masc vs femme (author knows that strict binary gender is created by society and culture and not true to natural expression of gender or non-gender)

And, yes, Atticus is a dapper dude. Being in a relationship with Otto probably brought even more dapper dude-ness out. Otto is a dapper dude, too. You should SEE both of their collections of flat caps, vests, and cardigans! It's like a Newsies fitting room in their closet.

As far as Atticus' thoughts about wearing more feminine things, they didn't begin to welcome back in the possibility of dresses and other femme-coded clothes until they started looking more masc via body and facial hair. It's the contrast visually in the femme and masc social and cultural categories that they wanted to achieve. They love the visual of someone who is hairy and masc presenting in clothes that are seen as feminine in themselves.

They own see-through mesh crop tops (as every queer should, in my opinion, don't at me) and flowy sundresses. But they wear things like that for parties and events. They're more comfortable in gremlin or dapper wear.

|P 3

They do both have wedding rings. I only believe this, because I have no doubt that either Otto knows a metalsmith or was one at some point. I am absolutely certain they have hand-crafted rings that hold some sort of significance from the metal it was crafted.

As far as jewelry, I think Otto probably had earrings (or just one) in his youth/young adulthood. I don't think he wore excessive rings because he used his hands too much for them to feel comfortable. Maybe bracelets or a necklace with some sort of stone on it.

Atticus, a late bloomer in their identity as nonbinary masc, definitely went through the overly abundance ring trend (including a poison ring because, of course!) and all of the 90's jewelry stuff with the chokers and hemp necklaces and yada yada. And if they were anything like me (I mean...) they had their neo 90's hippie phase, too.

We've established that Atticus probably has gauges currently. Otto doesn't really wear much jewelry, though he might have a bracelet or two. He seems like a bracelet guy on the wrist he doesn't wear a watch on.

They do both have watches. They are both very nice watches. They both have more than one watch. It's a clock maker/watch repairer thing.

I haven't really thought of anything specific for their accessory wear, though. This is all just off the top of my head speculation.

As far as thoughts on gender (specifically non-masculinity) and how it would go to experiment with the barriers...hm.

I honestly don't think Otto gave gender expression for himself beyond masculinity much thought before Atty. I mean, yes, he wore skirts and painted his nails and challenged masculinity expectations when he was younger, but I don't think he specifically identified those acts as affront to masculinity but, rather, as an affront to society in general.

I think Otto having Atticus as his partner and meeting other trans people has opened his eyes to gender in a way he never considered. And as a cis man who does not openly present as queer, he probably never had to consider gender. He had some privilege.

There was an article I read decades ago about a cis (this article was written before that term existed) man trying on a dress not as a joke, but as a genuine exploration into wearing clothes assigned to females. He was taken aback by how much emotion he felt when he looked in the mirror and he didn't look pretty. He saw an image that he, and society, defined as ugly and unacceptable. (Please keep the time period in mind for this.)

He actually got emotional. I think he had a friend who was a girl, or his wife, someone socially female to whom he related his shock and emotion. He felt disappointed, even though he didn't identify as female, at how horrible he perceived he looked. He was genuinely upset.

And I believe the female person consoled him and helped him adjust the dress and perhaps fixed his hair, stockings, shoes, makeup, whatever it was that was included in this little social experiment. But the idea of someone not actually realizing how traumatic it is to have to wear a costume of a gender when you are not that gender and not "succeed" and have an emotional reaction to that fact is very intriguing. (In addition, the gendered costume is that of the most criticized and judged gender for not looking a specific way, especially back then.)

I like to think that Otto experienced something similar to this experiment when deciding to explore femme clothing for some sort of queer event and felt these emotions that were so surprising and powerful that he didn't want to leave the house. I like to think that Atticus and Margie and Cindy helped him deal with those emotions and to understand where they came from. I also like to think he started to understand the discomfort of trans people when society tells them what gender is and that they don't fit where they feel most comfortable and might never fit no matter how hard they try. (Which hits me, specifically, the 5'0 nonbinary masc with not enough whiskers to cause any question to people calling me 'she' pretty darn hard. Thus, Atticus would definitely have that reaction as well.)

|P 4

HAHAHA. I thrive and perish in deep-dive answers and on-the-spot world building.

|P 5

They don't swear all that much. I dunno. That might be a generational thing. They swear when they feel it appropriate. Working retail has also beaten punctuational swearing out of me. But I do appreciate (unless it's a specific character trait) dialogue that isn't bogged down with swearing. This can be, and has been, done well in comedies and dramas. But for everyday life I guess they just don't find it necessary? I'm not sure I have a better answer than that except it might be generational.

As far as reclaiming queer slurs, maybe if Atticus was really riled up or feeling incredibly angry or confrontational, they would claim the small twig one. But it would have to be a pretty specific situation of which I don't know what would look like. Neither one of them are from a queer history where the word was used conversationally or affectionately. Atticus missed a lot of queer culture by discovering themselves later in life. They weren't a spunky butch kid. They were an introverted girl-thing who didn't understand why sex was so important and really liked Star Trek. They only became spunky after realizing and becoming who they were, so they haven't had much practice owning that confidence. Though they have much more than me. Another idealized part of Atticus that I've given them in addition to the killer body hair and mustache.

:looks up at tower of text:

Does this do anything?