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goldeneyedgirl · 1 year ago

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I know you have so many projects to work on, but I was just reading that fic you posted here where alice is kind of a witch (??) and jasper kind of kills her in the end (i forgot the title I'm sorry 😭) and I was thinking about how I think that one version of alice fits so much my idea of highschooler human alice and even the way her relationship with jasper starts. And all of that just to say: how do you picture a completely average human high school version of the cullens? Honestly, even as humans, I don't think that weirdos could ever be average.

Hi Anon!

The Dark and the Unknown! I'm actively working on it as we speak (it's being very difficult).

I absolutely love coming up with ordinary versions of the Cullens so I am obsessed with this question. I think any version of the Cullen family as they are in canon is going to be Weird, but being human makes it a little less obvious.

I will say that for me, one of the defining human-Cullen interpretations has to be Midnight Run by Inthemadhouse (tragically unfinished but one of the best Jalice fics online), so that has probably coloured some of my personal headcanons.

Strap yourself in, it's going to be long.

I'm working from the idea the family are Exactly As Presented in canon: Carlisle and Esme adopted a bunch of teenagers who then promptly hooked up with each other, with Edward being the first adoption, then Emmett, then Alice, and then the acquisition of Esme's twin niece and nephew. Obviously the ages of when they were acquired by Carlisle and Esme have to be fudged a little to make this work.

family stuff.

There is 0 chance that Esme and Carlisle (who I'm estimating are in their 30s because it's highly unlikely they would be approved for that combination of kids in their early 20s) would be paying out of pocket for five Ivy League educations plus dorm and books (approx 300k per student for undergrad). Without hundreds of years to build their wealth, Carlisle and Esme Normal Wealthy, not Batman Villain Wealthy.

I think Esme and Carlisle would want to teach a good work ethic, and set the kids up for success as adults. College would be an unspoken expectation because of white privilege and their wealth, but Esme and Carlisle would also accept a post high school plan that was realistic and researched. I also think Carlisle and Esme would be big on community service and volunteering, and not letting the kids just lie around during the summer.

Esme would have a small office/studio to run her architecture/interiors business out of, and she juggles work with running the household, and tries to give the kids more responsibility now that they're getting older. Carlisle would work long hours, but emphasise the importance of family time when he's off work - one of the reasons they go camping so often.

edward.

Edward is very literary and a bit pretentious. He reads the classics and has strong opinions and thinks that a lot of trends and pop culture is beneath him. He's the one wearing sweater vests and button downs to school - with a leather satchel - and his notebooks are all moleskines.

He thinks he's very artistic and spends a lot of time writing poetry and music for the piano, and pining for someone to understand him. He is insanely self-conscious about his appearance - especially his skin - and kind of awkward around his peers. He's not nearly as religiously coded as a human, but is determined to prove to Carlisle that he was worth the hassle of the adoption.

His best subjects are English Lit, Music, and European History. His co-curricular is probably the school play, where he plays piano. He's a nightmare to drag out of bed in the morning, and he tends to be very bossy with his family because he's been with the Cullens the longest. He's closest to Alice, but I see him actually getting along with Ben, Eric, and Angela at school. I think he'd kind of want to be friends with Jacob but try to be cool about it and come off as a snob. Edward cannot stand Rose or Jasper.

Edward would have been attracted to Bella's standoffish attitude when she arrived; the long-suffering thing is something he understands (he lives with four 'siblings' and only two bathrooms). They bond over classic novels and feeling out of place with their peers and whilst they get a little dramatic, they're very happy with each other.

bella.

We know teenage Bella but if she and Edward were humans together? Oof. Bella is starry-eyed over Edward from Day One, but knows how to hide it - she realizes that would put Edward off pretty fast.

I think Jacob and Bella would be quite close from her arrival in Forks, but Bella would be kind of on the fringes of her social set for all of high school. I also like to think that Jacob has his own friends and girlfriend, and doesn't spend his high school years pining after Bella.

I cannot see Bella and Alice being close friends in an all-human universe because Alice isn't starved for friends in this world, and Bella's got less of a reason to get her on side when immortality isn't the prize. I think they get along and hang out but they just don't have enough in common. I think Bella would irritate the shit out of Rose, getting caught asking too many questions about the family around school.

Bella would absolutely get pregnant before graduation. Edward has less religious hangups plus a contemporary upbringing... yeah, Ness was an accident. But Edward would definitely want to marry Bella before they went to college - I can definitely see Edward turning down Ivy League to stay with Bella at a public university.

emmett.

Emmett is sport like Ken is beach. I feel like Emmett plays two sports every season, probably coaches a kiddie league on the weekends, has a summer boy scout troupe, and works delivering pizzas after school. He loves the outdoors, loves activity. His grades are not great, honestly, but he does his best and he passes. He's definitely the student whispering if anyone did the homework and could he just... have a quick look two minutes before class starts. Emmett's one of those people who just has a lot of friends, though he would claim his best friend is either Edward or Jasper.

He's extremely popular because he's so friendly, and he's the kind of kid that adults go "Emmett Cullen doesn't sleep til noon on a Saturday. He's already coached two first grade basketball games and washed his mom's care by 10am." (Esme would look at them, unamused, and explain that she literally keeps two water jugs in the upstairs bathroom: one to wake up Edward and one to wake up Emmett.)

Emmett is also almost always the source of alcohol at high school parties, and makes the best fake I.Ds in the county. Charlie Swan knows it's Emmett, he just has no tangible proof. Yet.

Emmett has very little trauma due to being adopted, and definitely sees being a Cullen as winning the life lottery. He's the heart and soul of the family, and tends to use that to get out of any serious trouble.

I think that Rose and Jasper probably joined the family around age 12ish, and Emmett was probably smitten with Rose from first sight, and made a bit of a fool of himself and annoyed Rose for a few weeks before he relaxed and was just himself. He was naturally accepting of her boundaries, respectful, and the appropriate amount of protective over her when needed. I actually think Rose and Emmett got together after Alice and Jasper, probably around Freshman year. I know it's common that they are the pair that have the on-again, off-again dramatics, but I don't see it - perfect match. Emmett takes jokes about him dumping Rose for a cheerleader with 0 humor and shoots down any female - or male - that tries to flirt with him.

His best subjects are Gym and Chemistry. He's really easy-going and I can see him opting for a state university close to Rose because she has such strong preferences for her education. He gets along really well with the guys on the Res, hangs out there a lot, and is definitely a big brother figure for Seth after Harry's heart attack. He'd probably want to study something like video game design on a football scholarship in college.

rose.

Rose would not be a popular cheerleader. I need that out there. She has no interest in the social aspect, no interest in the culture of cheerleading, and has tunnel vision about her college plans.

I see Rose having a very type-A high school experience - all her classes are AP or college credit, she volunteers at the hospital in the summer (pediatrics), she runs a study group for STEM subjects because Forks High won't let her start a full-on robotics club, she's a member of the cross country team, and she works after school at Esme's office until she gets a job at a garage. She is utterly humorless about her grades, and she's going to be valedictorian, get into an Ivy League (ideally MIT, but she's flexible) on at least one decent scholarship.

And she makes it all look completely effortless. Meanwhile, she's still got a lot of baggage and trauma from before she joined the Cullen family, she's got a lot of anger, and she's just determined to rise about it without really dealing with it in a healthy way; Esme and Carlisle are terrified she's going to put all this work in, only to burn out before she makes it to college.

She intimidates the shit out of her classmates, and I feel like her closest friends at school would be, like, two other intense overachieving girls. She catches Bella trying to get gossip about the family from other students, and hates her from that moment on because Rose hates feeling like she's not normal. She knows their family is weird, but she wants the world to pretend it isn't.

I think Rose would actually become good friends with Leah Clearwater when she meets them via Emmett, and that she's insanely popular over at the Res with the boys because of her interest and knowledge in cars; between Rose, Jacob, and Sam, there is no car that they cannot get running again. I also think that Rose would stay in touch with Vera throughout their lives.

Rose and Edward hate each other with the fire of a thousand suns; Edward resents that Rose isn't grateful to Esme and Carlisle for taking her in because she should be honored (projecting just a little); Rosalie thinks that Edward is spoiled and has the self-awareness of a shoe-box and resents how treasured he is by the Cullens, but family therapy was just kind of a lot of yelling, so there's a mutual Cold War in the household.

Rose is also the most competent cook out of all the kids, but resents the fuck out of everyone when she's the one that the responsibility of cooking falls to on night's when the kids are cooking. The others learned fast that they had to participate or face her wrath.

Jasper and Rose are close in the way that siblings who have gone through something terrible together are, but their trauma is so different that it's hard for them to always related to the other. Emmett is Rosalie's foundation, her tether, and the person she hears no matter what. To the outsider, she seems like an ice-cold, controlling girlfriend but even when she's researching her college options, she's taking into account Emmett's wants and needs with those decisions. Rose feels so deeply that it makes her vulnerable so she hides it.

jasper.

I feel like before Forks, Jasper would have become very acquainted with drugs to cope with his past, and Carlisle and Esme had to intervene majorly - and that might have been one of the reasons that they decided to relocate the family to Forks. So like, now weed is his one vice to stay calm and get through the day, and he's pretty transparent with Esme, Emmett, and Alice about his smoking because of his previous addiction.

Jasper would be very quiet, and kind of just loom behind Alice at all times - I think 90% of the time, he'd have earbuds in. But he'd have a nasty temper and would definitely get into more than one fight, especially if someone said anything negative about Rose or Alice. And Jasper doesn't pick fights he won't win. He's kind of seen as the problem child of the family by the local gossips, even though Charlie Swan thinks that Jasper's a hell of a lot less trouble than Emmett. Charlie is, of course, totally incorrect as Jasper is the co-conspirer behind the fake I.D.s Emmett supplies, and has supplied a few parties with weed when he's feeling generous.

He absolutely got blackout drunk at a few parties before he quit drinking. He's kind of a sad and angry drunk, so it was for the best.

Jasper pretty much attached himself to Alice from his first day in the Cullen house, and they were definitely the first two to get together - Jasper has simped for Alice since he was 12, and has no plans to stop at any point. She's his favourite person, his best friend, and he's happy when she's happy, so he'll go to Homecoming, to the Winter Ball, to Spring Fling, Prom, anything to make her smile. He'll attend the school play every night because Alice designed the costumes.

At school, Jasper is the perpetual 'so smart, knows the material, puts 0 effort in'; he loves arguing with his teachers, and can turn a class into a three ring circus with minimal effort, but likes to save that for a couple of times a semester. He's the kind of asshole who shows up to finals, gets a perfect score, but hasn't handed in a single piece of homework. He's not really big on making friends, but he kind of does peripherally through Emmett and Alice. He'd argue his best friend is Peter, and they stay in touch for life. But he and Emmett get along great and are as close as bio brothers (even if Emmett cheerfully threatened to beat the shit out of him the first time he got caught with his hand up Alice's shirt.) Jasper definitely goes surfing at La Push and considers it meditative.

He and Edward have a frustrating relationship because of how much attention Jasper's struggles got him from Carlisle and Esme; Edward was jealous of how easily Carlisle told Jasper he was proud of him, and how Jasper was standoffish to Carlisle when he'd just been given the thing Edward craves more than anything. Carlisle also has an interest in history, and he and Jasper have long discussions about that together. Jasper finds Edward immature and spoiled but tries to keep the peace for Alice's sake.

He's most interested in American History and Technology. His co-curricular would be AV Club, but he really only shows up when they're pitching in for the school play. I definitely see Esme and Carlisle insisting he gets a job during the summer, and it would be something like helping run movies in the park during the summer, or working at the Forks Historical Society on Saturdays. He has no real plans for college, but I can see Jasper being one of those assholes who just gets a full ride to a really good school for reasons that are a mystery to everyone else.

alice.

Alice would be the most noticeable weirdo; I can see Alice being an Art Kid, and joining the school play just to design and make costumes, plus she wears a lot of homemade and customized clothing to school, as well as detailed make-up. But she's definitely up for joining clubs and socialising; I can't see her being a cheerleader because of the time commitment, but maybe doing ballet or gymnastics. Maybe a language club? And a photography club?

She's one of those people that just considers everyone a friend; I wouldn't be surprised if Esme and Carlisle had meetings to be like "no, Alice isn't ADHD. She's been tested, she's just high energy." I think she gets along really well with Jessica, kind of overwhelms Angela, and has a kind of Cold War of politeness going with Lauren. She's really welcoming to Bella and enthusiastic about her and Edward, but they don't have a ton in common so it's the odd movie night/sleepover when Bella's over at the Cullens.

Alice would be the peace-keeper between Edward and Rose and Jasper because she can translate Edward's dramatics into something tolerable for the others. She and Rose aren't super close, but they get along okay, and go shopping together often. Alice and Emmett probably have the most traditionally typical brother-sister relationship.

Alice seems a lot more innocent than she is, and that's partially her lack of memories from her childhood. She's very, very protective of Jasper in a subtle way; if he's drinking or getting high, she's staying by his side stone-cold sober, and she's definitely started at least one fight when someone said something about Jasper's scars. I think she'd have a lot of guilt over not being able to help Jasper with his addictions more than she did, even though she was a kid.

She's also the financial manager of Jasper and Emmett's little I.D. enterprise, and is definitely the sneakiest in the family - I think Alice would have a klepto streak as a human, and definitely be the one that knew her way around a lock-pick.

Her best classes would be Art, Economics, and maybe Forensics? She'd have no interest in English Lit or Sciences, but she'd get okay marks across the board - she's highly motivated if Carlisle is offering to pay them for As. She'd be looking at Parsons, Pratt, or RISD for college; maybe NYU. She'd have numerous jobs because Forks doesn't really have the kind of stores she'd aspire to work in, but I figure she negotiates selling accessories online with Carlisle and Esme instead of a traditional job. She'd volunteer to work on all the elementary school, middle school, and church plays.

I thin that's everything? I hope that's what you were looking for anon, but I had such a good time thinking about all this!

#anon #human cullens #meta #alice being the one that will jimmy open carlisle's liquor cabinet for emmett... for a price #rosalie going dead silent in the kitchen and everyone realises she's be left to cook dinner alone and they all sprint into the kitchen #babbling excuses #edward listening to evanescence on repeat for weeks when bella goes to florida for the summer

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stopthatfool · 1 year ago

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You KNOW I gotta hit you with some of these...

7, but give me Iceman or give me death; 21 and 24; and 38 for the Top Gun asks!! >:)

WOODSY! thank u thank u for the ask! (so excited i'm vibrating out of my body!)

7. Do you have any headcanons about [character or ship]?

Oh boy! Do I! alrighty, here we go!

ice drinks tea! he is a tea drinker! When he gets the chance, he'll have a cup before bed every night! (Black tea, some milk, some honey/sugar!)

Icemav looovveee old country music; like Patsy Cline, some Dolly Parton here and there, Glen Campbell (!!!!!), TAMMY WYNETTE (!!!!) etc. etc.

Mav used to take the mufflers off his motorcycle to make it sound really loud and to annoy the hell out of everyone driving and existing around him! (i hate him.)

Ice can draw! He doesn't practice often (rarely) but he can draw. he knows his way around a pencil.

1990's Bradley/Rooster would have loved Jeff Buckley! I just feel it in my bones.

Ok... i'll stop.. for now..

21. Favourite helmet design?

watch out. gonna be so pretentious art student about this one. i can't help myself i might have to give an opinion on everyone's helmet one day...

FAV HELMET-- phoenix's !! we don't talk about her helmet (and her tbh) enough!! i've seen different versions of it, some without something on the back, others with. But regardless, her helmet is still the best.

The typeface????? the cards on the side?? the spades?? the red leading line going across the whole helmet?? hello people?? this is a visual masterpiece!!! it's recognizable! It's simple, but detailed where it matters! the usage of space and negative space!! phoenix u should've been a graphic designer...

and when phoenix's helmet is compared to THIS!!!???!!

phoenix's looks like the fucking Sistine Chapel or something. yale, is that TIMES NEW ROMAN ON YOUR HELMET????? insane.

24. A line you quote all the time?

Oh oh oh! One I've been quoting the last couple weeks is:

Goose! Ah no!

It doesn't sound like how Mav talks throughout the rest of the movie and I find it so funny. Mav almost sounds like he's from... New York? Or Boston? (i don't actually know. as you know I'm not American so i don't know) but it's so fun to say.

And another one I used say is this line Slider says to Goose:

Goose, you're such a dickhead.

Idk, I say them to my cat mostly. but they replay in my head more often than I actually say them.

38. Which character do you project on the most?

As I've been writing for The Jeep Universe (also thank u for coming up with that! it's so much easier then typing out the whole title!), I've been projecting the most on Maverick!

Me and Maverick are very similar in some ways (sigh, diagnosed with ADHD way too late) and i think that allows me to be more critical with him. And as I continued to explore his personality I realized that we're alike, not in the impulsive, balls to the wall way, but on an emotional regulation and "mental" level (does that even make sense) me and mav are similar. and that's probably part of the reason I can't stand him sometimes.

I'm sorry this got so long! but I was having fun so whatevs. Thank you again for the asks!! this was wonderful!

#im sorry yale but come on now. new times new roman??? ur crazy im sorry #don't ever get me started on ice's helmet i will be mean #top gun ask game #top gun 1986 #top gun #stopthatfool goes crazy and explodes

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myoldiaries · 2 years ago

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can you talk more about your issue with that post? (i have no opinion on it, just curious abt your thoughts)

I think it simply boils down to a slightly skewed literary explanation. I do treat every album as like this "work" and especially with Taylor who is explicitly sad when there's a sad song, the post comes off as pretentious. Midnights doesn't match their bullet points at all. Just because you're sad and listening to a song doesn't also make the song, also, inherently sad. There is far too much projection on the post and it's more impaired than my vision lol. Midnights is an album about everything! It's a mature body of work and I really thought that was palpable. She's not crying herself to sleep every night and there's a proud reclaim of that. Even in Anti 'I'm the problem it's me' Hero, we know that she has accepted herself as however it is and in Sweet Nothing, someone else has accepted her. The post also uses 'mastermind' as a somewhat downplay on a personality when it's like it has its highs and lows. I believe rather than focusing on the "no one wanted to play with me as a little kid" part, we should rather superimpose on the part where it's like sigh kid, it gets better. And I really believe it does cause I actually listened to the song rather than grubbing any cent of sadness one can find in a song.

If we paint out every (every. single.) album as a Sad Girl Album how are ever going to find ourselves in music? Yes, one song is about sadness but the next one is about hope, the next one is about humming in the kitchen, maybe the next one is about the city of LOVE. It's obviously happens to so much of music made my women (taylor isn't even the biggest victim of that so this isn't the post) like I'm a staunchly believe that a curtain isn't simply "just blue" but that doesn't also make the curtain green, lol. I'm sure if I can scroll the blog I'll find a very similar post for folklore, evermore, red tv even. Making everything poignant in an attempt to fake it as being deep is such a dumb way to look at music. It isn't a Jo March album, Midnight Rain is more about a situation rather than a person. This album hasn't even read any gut wrenching novels and that's FINE, she spent her whole youth trying to find herself and she finally has! That is what midnights is.

She's not empty from inside! She likes having the keys to her castle! She'll never change herself, she'll stay as the mastermind/has something they can't take away. If you think this is the unlovable album wait till you listen to her debut (oh, the undertones). It's so hard to craft a proper parts happy-parts sad album imo and her you go dumbing down every aspect of happiness because it's the new cool to be "mentally ill"/ perpetually misunderstood. There are songs and entire albums written with the intention of Oh, I'll write a sad song. Find those albums! Seek yourself in the right places, sigh.

To conclude, the post is obv a reblog bait cause 90% of tumblr demographic is the person they described so great move, overall.

#asks #i'm exactly the person they described in the post and at the time the post was written i strongly DISLIKED midnights but i love her #nonetheless & i'll protect her from any incorrect literary elucidation.

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vulpes-fennec · 2 years ago

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The Fae Equality Initiative (Ch. 9) 🌊

Summary: We return to our sexy High Lord of Summer TRYING HIS BEST to keep the ball rolling on fae equality.

Tarquin, High Lord of the Summer Court, has sent ripples of shock throughout Prythian with his plans to eliminate discrimination against Lesser Fae. When the Night Court is invited to send a delegation to Summer Court, Elain Archeron can’t wait to show everybody what she’s capable of on her first official Inner Circle assignment. Little does she know that Tarquin has also recruited Lucien Vanserra’s assistance…

Read: Ch 1 | Ch 8 | AO3

Tarquin was being subjected to torture as he listened to the squabbling of Adriata’s public forum. What started as a way to solicit his citizens’ comments had devolved into frequent arguments and even brawls that his guard had to break up. Just because fists stopped flying, didn’t mean tension stopped simmering in the air.

“Can’t you see? Even if we amended the zoning laws in Adriata, the Fae will still be clustered in districts of extravagant wealth, middle class, and relative poverty.”

“Yes, but the point is that we aren’t preventing certain Fae from living in wealthy districts. If they have the means, they are free to move wherever they’d like.”

“What will we do about the growing number of humans still in the court? My sister-in-law from Ibaria says the human refugee camp has morphed into a permanent settlement.”

“We don’t want any humans in the Summer Court! Think of all the horrible ash wood they’ll bring to protect themselves—our lives will be at risk!”

“Exactly, they are creatures with no sense of morality and hygiene. And they reproduce like rabbits! Our lands will be overrun in no time.”

“I want to make clear that I wholeheartedly oppose the idea of an integrated merchant fleet. What’s wrong with the tiered system from before?”

“Think of all the rapport that will be broken with newcomers! These ties have existed for centuries, and now we have to include the Lesser Fae in our trading voyages?”

“We are simply other merchants, not total newcomers. I don’t understand why these High Fae think so highly of themselves, when it was the bronze tier, the Lesser Fae fleet, that brought down more of Hybern’s armada during the war!”

“Well, I’m a Lesser Fae and I don’t want to integrate with you pretentious bastards. Who’s with me?”

The chiming of bells that indicated the meeting’s end was music to Tarquin’s ears. “Thank you everybody for coming out today.” Tarquin projected his voice through the hall amidst grumbles and murmurs. “If you have not had a chance to speak, we hope to hear from you next week.”

Guilt warred with relief as he left the dais. Shouldn’t leaders listen to their people with patience, with undivided attention? I’m trying, I really am…but sometimes the things they say have me rolling my eyes.

Things like the mental gymnastics they executed in order to defend questionable opinions. Or their blatant hypocrisy. Or when they asked about something that was easily discoverable in the public record.

The public forum had been his brainchild when he returned from Under the Mountain. Amarantha’s tyrannical rule was a prime example of what not to do in court. Tarquin thought it would be an excellent opportunity to hear directly from his people, to make them feel heard. Unfortunately, he frequently left these meetings feeling exhausted and irritated.

He needed to vent, but Varian was supervising training for the new recruits and today was Cresseida’s day off. I definitely need more friends, Tarquin thought dejectedly. If I wasn’t so gods-damned busy all the time, maybe I could make some. He’d lost 50 years of socializing being Under the Mountain, and now all his free time was sucked up by his ambitious plans for the Summer Court.

So Tarquin ended up knocking on the door of Lucien’s room.

“Tarquin!” The foxy male’s face broke into a wide grin. ”Do come in.”

Tarquin felt a strange tickling sensation on his bare arms as he crossed the threshold, as if some magic had put out feelers to sense who entered the room. Strange. I don’t recall warding the delegation rooms in such a manner.

“Oh, I don’t need a drink,” he said quickly when Lucien began uncorking a bottle of wine.

“You look like you need one,” Lucien objected, pouring Tarquin a glass anyway. “Besides, I bought this in the harbor today. Good wine should be shared with friends.”

Tarquin had to admit Lucien was right when he took a sip of the tangy, slightly bitter wine. “Thank you, Lucien. Sometimes I forget when to relax.”

Lucien settled on the armchair across from him. “I know the feeling,” he admitted. “Court never stops. If you’re not addressing urgent needs during working hours, you’re keeping tabs on gossip all the time. How was the public forum?”

“Cauldron boil me.” Tarquin rubbed his brow. “Utter chaos. No productive conversations anymore. Questionable thinking left and right.”

Lucien gazed at him with deep sympathies. “Sounds like a mess.”

“It really is a mess. I was trying to emulate the Night and Day Courts, but it’s not working. You know, how Rhysand and Feyre have a public session for the city of Velaris, and Rhodes has these public gatherings for civic discussion?”

Lucien nodded, in deep thought. “What if you have each district host its own public forum every week? And then have a monthly meeting convening the district community leaders for a more productive conversation?” the emissary suggested. “That way each citizen can still voice their concerns, but when it comes to city-wide issues, there aren’t as many voices shouting at each other.”

“Hmm. Has this idea been tried anywhere else?” Tarquin asked. “It certainly sounds much more manageable than the chaos we have now.”

“Not in Prythian. But Queen Vassa had implemented something similar when she lived on the continent. It worked well for her.” Lucien shrugged.

“Alright then, I’ll give it a shot. Right—since you have such good ideas, Lucien, I was wondering if you’d be willing to pick up some contract work for us while you’re here.”

“What is it?”

“Nothing too intrusive.” Tarquin proceeded to explain the idea for a permanent committee to assist with the transition, then oversight of his social mandates. And Lucien’s compensation, should he choose to accept.

“Sounds manageable to me,” Lucien said with a teasing grin. “You’ve got some good ideas up your sleeve too. I’m in.”

“It was technically Varian’s idea.” Tarquin bowed his head humbly. He took a sip of his wine, savoring the notes of pomegranate. “Anyways, I’ve been dying to know…how did you end up defeating Koschei? Wasn’t Queen Vassa bound with a blood curse?”

He’d only heard of the death god in legend, and had quaked upon seeing the Bone Carver and the Weaver unleash hell in battle. I’d rather sit through public forum for the rest of my life than meet Koschei.

A shadow of unease passed over Lucien’s face. “We were very lucky. I…Vassa was most familiar with Koschei, so we…we played a clever trick on him,” he said vaguely. “Jurian rightfully made the kill. To be honest, I’m not even sure myself how it happened.”

Well, Lucien’s definitely not telling me the truth. Part of Tarquin was a bit hurt, but the other part was empathetic towards his friend. What’s done is done, and perhaps dealing with Koschei was more traumatic than he let on. I won’t press Lucien on it anymore.

“Well, he’s gone now, thanks to you three.” Tarquin gave Lucien an easy grin to lighten the mood. “And are Queen Vassa and Jurian…?” The question hung in the air.

Lucien grinned back, anxieties lifting. “Let’s just say the humans will be receiving a King Consort soon.”

“It’s about time.”

Lucien shook his head ruefully. “I’m glad the palace was renovated quickly after Vassa’s re-coronation, though. Mother knows how many times I’ve walked in on the two of them being grossly intimate with each other in that tiny manor house.”

“Oh gods,” Tarquin groaned. “My condolences.”

Lucien waved his hand aimlessly. “And what about you? Anyone special in your life?”

“Not at all. Perhaps once this whole thing settles down, I’ll find time for a relationship.”

Lucien shrugged. “Who says you need to be in a relationship to have some fun? According to some of the local press, you definitely have your fair share of swooning admirers in Adriata.”

Tarquin sent a tiny flick of water across Lucien’s cheek. “As if I’m the one who’s such a ladies man,” he chuckled. “I’m still quite young. I don’t need to think about settling down for a while.”

“Call me old and decrepit already, won’t you? Don’t you worry, Tarquin, we’ll find you someone perfect.”

Tarquin wasn’t sure if it was the wine, but Lucien seemed chattier today. Snarkier—more like his old self. “And what about you, Lucien? How have things been—or not been—with Elain Archeron?”

Lucien’s tanned face turned crimson as he explained the interactions from the last few days, from Elain acknowledging his presence to their frank conversation and library encounter. “Tarquin, what does it mean when a female asks if you’d like to eat lunch with her?” Lucien finished.

Tarquin rolled his eyes. “Do you hear yourself? Asking me of all people for advice?”

“I’m serious, Tarquin!” Lucien put his glass down and covered his face with a pillow.

Tarquin sighed. “Well, I can’t speak for Elain, but if she sought your company, then you must not be entirely abhorrent,” he commented dryly. “What did you two eat?”

“Sushi,” came Lucien’s muffled reply. “She said she liked it. But I may or may not have laughed at her when she took a mouthful of wasabi.”

“You laughed at her? I thought you were supposed to be good with the ladies.”

“I am!” Lucien sat up, his eyes flashing wildly. “I must have become rusty. And when it comes to Elain…well, she’s my mate. I’ve messed up enough, and I don’t even know how I truly feel about her.”

“You’d think mating bonds would be easy. They snap, the two Fae fall for each other, they live happily ever after because the bond just greases the wheels and smooths out any incompatibility with its magic.”

“Do you feel that if you and Elain had gotten to know each other, without any mate business involved, a romance blossomed more easily?”

Lucien hesitated. “But that’s the big question, isn’t it? I want to say yes, but I don’t know.”

“I can pay special attention to any mated pairs at court. Understand how they chose each other. See how their relationships played out over the years,” Tarquin offered.

“Thank you,” Lucien replied, his cheeks still crimson.

“Well, I would love to stay and chat for longer, but I should make my way down the hall and check in with the rest of the delegations,” Tarquin said, getting up. “Thank you for the wine.”

“Anytime.” Lucien got up to walk the High Lord to the door. “I’ll get started on research and outreach for the committee tomorrow.”

Tarquin visited each of the delegations, reaching the Night Court delegation’s door last. Balthazar and Elain were nibbling on a pre-dinner plate of pastries and tea, enjoying the balmy evening air. They graciously invited him to join them.

“I hope that you two have had a comfortable stay so far?” Tarquin asked.

“Excellent,” Balthazar said. The Illyrian male, Balthazar, was not at all like Rhysand, Cassian, or Azriel. He was tall and lanky, with the awkward but well-meaning airs of an adolescent. “Adriata is beautiful and Varian showed me where the training court is.”

Elain also seemed to have relaxed since her first day, which Tarquin was glad to see. “Yes, you’ve been a wonderful host,” she added. If the female had any feelings about the morning she’d spent with Lucien, she did not show it on her beautiful face.

“What have you two been up to today?” Tarquin inquired casually.

“I met with Sona and Jaime this morning. We were discussing the stereotypes the Fae have for each other. For example, Sona said that water wraiths have a bad reputation for being greedy and voracious creatures. And you know…Illyrians like me are thought of as bloodthirsty and war-mongering.”

Tarquin nodded. “I myself have certainly seen many animosities between the fire and water sprites of the Courts,” he agreed. “Between some hives, it’s friendly bickering. For others, it’s pretty vicious.”

“Exactly. And we weren’t sure how much things would change—or stay the same—moving forward,” Balthazar finished.

“And what about you, Elain?” Tarquin asked pointedly. “What did you do today?”

The corner of Elain’s mouth twitched, and her cheeks colored pink. Aha, Tarquin thought slyly. She must be recalling what she did with Lucien. A promising sign for him, if I ever did see one.

“I was doing some research in the Summer Palace’s libraries,” she demurred. “And…and I had lunch in the city.”

“Oh, really? What did you eat?” And who did you eat with, Tarquin wanted to ask, even though he already knew the answer.

Elain’s mouth curved in a shy smile, making Tarquin feel even more satisfied. “I had sushi.”

“Sushi? Is that raw fish?” Balthazar said with astonishment. “How was it?”

“I liked it! You must try it, Balthazar. But do avoid eating the green paste—it made my nose burn horribly.”

Tarquin chuckled. “I see you’ve discovered wasabi, Elain. I advise mixing small amounts of it with the other condiments in the future for a more pleasant experience.”

“Oh, it wasn’t too bad. It just took me by surprise,” Elain assured him. The trio fell into easy conversation, soon after. Balthazar regaled them with harrowing tales of dodging beasts in the Illyrian mountains. Elain answered all of Tarquin’s questions about Velaris. And Tarquin gave them a run-down of Summer Court’s must-try delicacies, and where his favorite spots were in Adriata.

“By the way, is there anything that we can do for you, Tarquin?” Balthazar asked.

“Actually, if you, Sona, and Jaime are willing, I can set aside time during the central committee meeting this weekend for you to share your findings or lead a discussion?”

Balthazar nodded. “Yes, of course. We can put something together for you to review the day prior?”

“Thank you. Adriata is home to many different Fae species, so feel free to make use of all our resources.”

“Tarquin, are there any…human-centered organizations in Adriata? I was thinking I could devote some time volunteering for them. Or perhaps, anything else you need assistance on?” Elain piped up, her expression one of strained yearning. Like she was trying to remind them that she was of use.

Humans? That’s right—Lucien said Queen Vassa wanted more fair and equal treatment of humans living in Prythian as well.

Humans were winnowed temporarily into Adriata during the war, but many of their homes in the human lands had been completely destroyed. So they settled in the Summer Court, which had been challenging for humans and Fae alike. Tarquin had passed several emergency ordinances that protected them from being outright harmed, but living amongst the Fae could not be easy.

“We actually do have a charity that is dedicated to helping humans settle in Adriata,” he recalled. “It’s called Safe Harbor House. Would you be interested?” Elain nodded eagerly. “Alright then. I’ll have Cresseida take you tomorrow morning at 10.”

“Thank you, Tarquin!” Elain said eagerly, blatant relief on her face.

She reminds me of when I first became High Lord…eager to prove myself and take on all sorts of tasks. Did Feyre and Rhysand not give her any Night Court assignments prior to this? Tarquin observed.

Tarquin bid Balthazar and Elain goodnight, for he had plenty of work to catch up on. But instead of cracking open the latest stack of reports, the High Lord of Summer mused over Lucien’s crimson face and Elain’s shy smile.

I really shouldn’t pry, but there HAS GOT to be something there. The two of them managed to clear up past miscommunication, which is a good start. And Elain asked if Lucien would eat lunch with her.

Even though Lucien says he doesn’t know how he feels about Elain, he’s clearly charmed by her. Elain was also noticeably flustered when she recalled the day’s events. But with Lucien hesitating to initiate anything with his mate…and with Elain still used to human customs of courtship…

He suddenly had an idea. Everything was coming together. Tarquin began penning a letter to the High Lady of Winter:

Dear Viviane, I have a strong suspicion that our friend Lucien may be making more progress with Elain than we’d previously thought. If you are returning to Adriata this weekend, I must ask you to join me in devising ways to set the mated pair up…this is my first idea…

Resources linked here!

Read: Ch 10

Notes: Ok but what's Tarquin's idea hmmm? Anyways, this is a LOT OF PLOT but I promise it's laying the groundwork for a reason. Things are going to start picking up next chapter!

#elucien #elucien fanfic #elain archeron #lucien vanserra #tarquin acotar #summer court #acotar fanfic

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oceanblueeyesoul · 2 years ago

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Hi!! Could I have a male PJO & Marauders match-up pls? Thank you so much in advance! 💖

LOOKS: I'm a mixed race Latina with long dark hair, brown doe eyes, pale-olive skin w/ a light dusting of freckles, & a curvy, top-heavy hourglass figure!

STYLE: Baddie/Bombshell + Pastel Grunge!

DIALECT: I sound like a pretty typical Valley Girl that makes people tend to underestimate me (💀) but occasionally, a subtle Southern drawl slips out!

MBTI: INFP

GODLY PARENT: Aphrodite Areia ~ aka the Dark Feminine aspect of Aphrodite! Not many ppl know that she was a warrior goddess too, not just the patroness of Love & Beauty. Ppl do terrible things for love sometimes & the intensity + seductive aspects of it can be dangerous. Aphrodite was born of the sea but the sea is not just beautiful but deadly & unpredictable as well!

DEMIGOD GIFTS/ABILITIES: Charmspeak (people & animals alike tend to gravitate towards me!), Empathic Manipulation, Strong Swimmer (Aphrodite was born of the sea after all!)

WEAPON: I’d definitely use a mortuary sword while riding on a pegasus tbh

PERSONALITY: I'm told I’m the personification of the Subversive Bimbo trope (like Harley Quinn from DC Comics) bc ppl tend to underestimate me since I come off v sweet & bubbly until I’m given a reason not to be BUT I have a sharp temper so give me a reason & I will be the first to lash out. When I get mad, I don’t hold back & my sarcasm becomes VICIOUS but as long as you don’t piss me off, you won’t be on the other end of it.

People on my good side say I’m affectionate, vivacious, feisty, sweet, friendly, intuitive, sensitive, idealistic, impulsive, snarky/funny, & smart!

People on my bad side say I’m a fiery, stubborn, opinionated, temperamental hellcat lol. I can go from 0 to 100 real quick & God help the person who disrespects my S/O bc I would go to WAR for him. He is my ultimate Achilles Heel bc I would sacrifice myself for him in an instant.

I might be a bit of a Nihilist lol…And when I’m convinced of something, I can be hella stubborn & will go to bat for it, for better or worse.

I love really hard & I’m Fiercely protective of those I care about but my intense love for them can make me reckless.

I'm a sweet lil firecracker lol, both fiery & feminine (my winged eyeliner is my warpaint lol).

TLDR: I’m told I'm sort of a "good girl gone bad" type, both sweet sugar & rebellious spice. 🤭

LOVE LANGUAGES: Words of Affirmation + Physical Touch

ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Good

ENNEAGRAM TYPE: Counterphobic 6

HP HOUSE: Slytherdor (aka Justice, by any means necessary)

PATRONUS: Swan (Delicate-seeming but fierce & protective!)

LIKES: Animals of all kinds, True Crime, All Forms of PDA (I LOVE AFFECTION!!!), Dark humor, Comic books, Singing/Musical Theatre, Astrology, Psychology, Writing, Genealogy, Fun Facts, Iced coffee (can’t live without it tbh).

DISLIKES: Bigots, Animal Abusers, Driving, Obnoxious or Pretentious People, Womanizers, People who are indifferent to others, waking up early

Thank you so much in advance, lovely!! 💖

Hi there, sweetie! I really hope you like this a lot!

PJO Matchup

Your PJO soulmate is...

FRANK ZHANG!

He would definitely be petting all animals in the zoo for you because he wants you to be happy with the animals and himself too.

He would absolutely love fun facts as well because he thought the fun facts are really knowledge but also fun at the same time.

He would be a very good driver and he would drive at any place you wanted to go to at any time.

Chaotic Good x Chaotic Good sweethearts!

Hufflepuff x Slytherdor lovebirds!

INFP x INFP soulmates!

Cancer x Capricorn intertwined lovers!

Harry Potter (Marauders Era) Matchup

Your Harry Potter (Marauders Era) soulmate is...

REMUS LUPIN!

He would appreciate your courage to stand up for people who are mean to him because he is a werewolf and also he is mostly the only one who gets to calm you down when people are pushing your buttons a lot.

He would definitely be interested in astrology a lot actually so he is thankful for your help when it comes to finding out about which zodiac signs placements he does have in his birthchart.

The two of you would definitely have coffee dates together and you guys would always order the same iced coffee drink together because both of you loves the taste of the iced coffee drink.

Lawful Good x Chaotic Good lovebirds!

Gryffindor x Slytherdor soulmates!

INFJ x INFP intertwined lovers!

Pisces x Capricorn sweethearts!

#oceanblueeyesoul #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo matchups #matchups #frank zhang #frank zhang x reader #harry potter #harry potter matchups #remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #mauraders

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purplesurveys · 2 years ago

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1596

Is Christmas your all-time favorite holiday? If so, why? I count my birthday as a holiday, and that’s actually my favorite one – I’m more intense with preparations and treats on my birthday than any other holiday. I feel like my overall feelings about Christmas are dulled knowing the reason why it’s even celebrated in the first place. I’m here just for the food and the 2-week company shutdown I get to enjoy, lol. Is Christmas more about presents or family? Family (and food, haha). Never been about the presents for me in the sense that I wouldn’t mind if someone didn’t have a gift for me; I do like getting presents for my loved ones though, just to let them know they’re always in my thoughts.

Do you have your Christmas tree and decorations up? We have a Christmas tree that’s bombarded with decorations, and we we put that up starting either late October or early November. We used to have a wreath by our front door, too, but we haven’t done that in a few years.

Do you even decorate? Yeah, just the tree. It’s filled with every kind of Christmas tree trinket you can think of, though.

Have you ever told a person that they are all you want for Christmas? Nah, not even with my last partner. I find it too cringey lol.

What are you hoping to get this Christmas? All I asked for is anything with BTS’ faces on it, doesn’t matter if it’s an authentic product or fanmade or replicas, to make it easier for everyone who might have no clue what to get me. But really, I’m fine with anything and nothing. It sounds so pretentious LOL but honestly the effort and presence of family and friends alone is enough.

By any chance is it a game console? I don’t think I ever asked for a game console for Christmas, this year being no exception; we weren’t the most well-off family in my childhood years and I didn’t want to put any more pressure for my parents.

Do you even make Christmas lists? I make Christmas shopping lists, if that’s what you mean. Mine is more or less done, just have around 4-5 people to buy for and I’ll be all set.

Are you grateful with anything you get for Christmas? Yes. Comes with the upbringing. I have relatives who have difficulties getting by, so if I get anything from them at all I know it must have taken lots of effort and thought. I’m grateful for literally anything and I make sure to use everything I receive, whether it’s a generic mug or headband or phone stand or whatever.

Have you ever given away a gift because you didn't like it? No. I’m honestly just genuinely grateful for any gift I get! And I like to make good use of every single one.

Have you ever gotten a gift that you felt like you couldn't accept? Yeah, last year my friends got together and we basically exchanged K-pop merch with one another so I felt super shy accepting what they got me! I feel like I felt this the most with Reena’s gift - a picket of Taehyung, hahaha.

Are you going to do any traveling this Christmas? Just short-term trips - we’re heading south on the 25th to gather with my dad’s side. We also have a quick vacation the weekend immediately after New Year’s.

Is anyone coming to visit you for Christmas? No, we’re the ones doing all the visiting.

In your opinion, what is Christmas really all about? Spending time with family that you only get to see during this time of the year.

Do you enjoy the 25 days of Christmas on some TV channels? I have no clue what this means.

What Christmas movie is your favorite? Love Actually and It’s A Wonderful Life!

Have you seen 'A Christmas Story'? If so, did you like it? I haven’t seen it.

Do you think that 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas' is lame or classic? I’ve never seen that either.

What is the first Christmas movie you have seen this month? Haven’t watched anything Christmas-y so far. The only thing I’ve binge-watched is Breaking Bad, and that is the furthest thing that would give you holiday vibes lol.

Do you enjoy listening to Christmas music? Eh, not really. I like the jazzy kinds, but overall I rarely turn on Christmas playlists. Mariah Carey, Michael Buble, and Friends™ are way too overplayed during the holiday season anyway.

Do you really get involved in the Christmas spirit? Idk what this question is trying to ask, so I guess not. Like I said, I am largely here for the food and the 2-week vacation I get to get, lol.

Does the Christmas environment make you feel comfortable? You know what? I’m really glad and grateful that it’s been starting to actually feel that way. I had the worst seasonal depression every single year a while back, and Christmas was always something I dreaded. If I wasn’t in a family reunion that I didn’t want to be in, I kept myself locked in my room where I watched whatever comfort show I felt like watching. Not the case anymore.

Do you donate toys for the toy drive this time of year? Not toys. But I’m looking at donating money for a few animal shelters I follow. When I’m able to save up more, I’d love to give in-kind donations, like leashes, pet food, etc.

What is the best Christmas gift you have ever received? Paramore tickets.

Have you ever cried on Christmas day? Maybe Christmas 2020 because it was my first post-breakup Christmas? Idk I barely remember anything from the time but I’m not ruling out crying.

Are you usually the first one to wake up on Christmas day? I haven’t noticed. Probably not.

Are your favorite colors red and green? No, my current favorite is purple.

What colors do you like to see in Christmas lights? Yellow.

Have you ever helped your friends decorate for Christmas? No, that’s usually a family thing where I’m from, and I’m not about to interrupt their own decorating sesh.

Do your Christmas decorations stay up until New Year's? Until the end of January; that’s how long the Christmas season is here.

Are you usually the one that takes down the decorations? Our entire family does, since we have a million Christmas tree decors up.

In your opinion, what is the best gift you have ever given someone? Unfortunately that title belongs to stuff I’ve given my last partner; I always went down the sentimental path when it came to giving them gifts, so there were a few presents that I was a little prouder of. But putting that aside, probably the film camera I’m getting my cousin and his fiancée this year! They recently got engaged, so I thought of getting them that so they can capture more 2023 memories the old-school way.

Have you ever given someone a gift they didn't like? I’m sure. Nobody can get it right all the time. < This. I’ve had to be resourceful in the past when I wasn’t earning yet, and I’m sure I had misses here and there.

Is it really the thought that counts? Yeah. Again, it all boils down to perspective since I have loved ones who aren’t the most well-off but insist on buying presents. I’m grateful for anything I receive even if I never really expect stuff from anyone.

Do you throw Christmas parties every year? Well our house is a little farther than everyone else’s and is also a bitch to get to, so as much as we want to host parties we don’t really do so to avoid hassling people. We’re the ones who do the visiting. I host parties for other stuff though, like if there are online BTS concerts to watch.

Do you even enjoy Christmas parties? Yeah, but it depends on the crowd. Parties with family and friends are great, but my social battery drains out faster if I’m at like a company Christmas party.

What happened on the worst Christmas you ever had? I’d say 2020 because I had to fake a smile through most of it when I was crushingly depressed inside. But it also allowed me to recognize the people and things I did have around me.

Has Christmas been on your mind more and more as the days go by? It’s barely in my mind, honestly. I can’t even believe it’s already the 21st -- I have none of my presents wrapped, and tomorrow I still have to shop for 3 more people lol. I’m mostly ecstatic that I get 2 weeks off work and want to focus on resting up and powering up for 2023.

Do you usually count down the days until Christmas? Only as a kid, when Christmas used to feel a lot bigger and more exciting. Only thing I’m counting down for anymore is Jin’s discharge from the military...

Do you know people who hate Christmas? I used to – the person was me. These days I don’t think anyone I know hates the holidays.

What age did you stop believing in Santa Clause? I never believed tbh and I remember being 4 or 5 and questioning his ‘midnight visits.’ I didn’t understand why I had to be asleep for him to drop by.

Do you host any kind of Christmas event or help with it? Starting last year my Army friends and I get together for Christmas to exchange gifts and have some drinks, and we plan that out together. This year’s gathering is going to be tomorrow.

Do you like eggnog? I’ve never tried but I’d love to have it someday!

Have you ever done a 'Secret Santa'? Yes, monito-monita is a big tradition in our extended family, on my mom’s side, and we’ve been doing it...pretty much the entire time I’ve been alive, lol.

Do you hate to see people sad on Christmas? I mean, I don’t like seeing people sad at any time of the year. < This is true. To answer the question more directly though, I guess I feel for people who don’t want to be alone on Christmas but end up so.

Have you ever ruined someone else's Christmas? I hope not? Idk for sure.

Do you decorate any online profiles for Christmas? No.

If you could live Christmas over day after day, would you? No. Imagine how tiring/draining that would be...

Do you have any pets that you buy Christmas presents for? No, it’s not like they can grasp the context of Christmas lol. Their dinners during this time of the year get a whole lot fancier though LOL

Are you or have you ever been in a Christmas play? If so, which one was it? Nopes.

Does Christmas get old year after year? Not for me, but I empathize with people who feel this way. Personally, I feel that it doesn’t get ‘old’ per se; it’s just that the older you get, the bigger shoes you have to fill, you know? You start to be the grownup who helps the other grownups in organizing parties, who has to think of nieces and nephews and family friends to give presents to, who has to start paying attention on whether or not you’re keeping within budget, who has to focus on feeding people and making sure everyone comes home full, etc. Christmas is largely a test of practicality for me at this point.

Do you like, love, or hate Christmas shopping? I dread it at the start when I open my shopping apps and there are like 47374934723822038207483 stuff to choose from. But being able to find a good gift for someone is always a nice feeling.

Has anyone ever ruined your Christmas? I remember having to take care of 50 work-related deliveries in the middle of Christmas in 2020. Same year I also had a client who needed reports to be done on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, so I was literally working on my laptop while in the car and on the way to see family.

Have you witnessed your neighbors arguing on Christmas? (I have, bad scene) I haven’t. People are just karaokeing all over the place lol.

Are you working on Christmas? We have a company shutdown that started today and lasts until January 3rd, but of course that doesn’t permit us to completely shut off our lines from our clients. Urgent things that can’t be avoided still have to be attended to, of course, but in general we have these two weeks off to relax.

Have you ever had to work on Christmas? Yeah, I touched on that a bit earlier.

Have you ever lost someone special on Christmas? Fortunately not during the Christmas season. But like most people I’ve had to deal with those ‘first Christmases’ - first Christmas without a grandparent, a friend, a pet, etc who died earlier in the year.

Is Christmas better than New Year's or are they both equally awesome? I love New Year’s. It was always the more exciting holiday for me.

Are you really excited for Christmas? Not really, it’s just nice to be off work. < Completely this.

Did you like this survey? I hope so. Well, bye! ^_^ Sure, thanks!

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suckitsurveys · 2 years ago

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This time last year, what was happening in your life? It really wasn’t that much different, honestly.

Did you/will you have coffee or some other form of caffeine today? I have coffee right now..

Who did you last have a text conversation with and what was it about? My best friend Sarah was telling me she and her husband went to the mansion where they filmed The Big Lebowski and we were just quoting things back to each other lol.

Are there regular trains in and out of your town/city? Yes, and local ones as well.

Do you bathe your pets regularly? They bathe themselves.

Do you have a mailbox or do you collect your mail from the post office? We have a mailbox.

What was the last animal you saw, and was it a pet? No, it was a bunny.

Have you ever had an ear infection? I have. They’re quite unpleasant.

If you could watch any TV series right now, what would it be? I need to get into a BUNCH of shows. Succession and Severance both come to mind right now.

Would you have any clue when your best friend last got their hair cut? Nope.

Someone messages you just as you’re about to go to sleep. Do you reply? Definitely depends on who it is.

Do you grind your teeth, and if so, why do you do it? No.

Have you ever been hospitalized due to dehydration? No.

Is there anything you need to remember to do before the day ends? Get my city sticker for my car.

When you listen to music with headphones, do you keep the volume low enough to hear surrounding noise faintly, or do you blast it? It definitely depends.

What’s your favorite online radio site? Spotify.

Do your parents have any authority over who you date? No, I’m 33 and married.

How many different shades of nail polish do you have? On? Right now I have a clear iridescent polish with remnants of a french tip mani with pastels and gold glitter. A few of them broke so I had to just cut them all down. I also have a lovely mix of purple and teal on my toes from when my 4 yo niece painted them lol.

What did you have for breakfast this morning? A banana and I’m about to have two rice cakes with peanut butter.

Are you lucky enough to have an ice maker in your refrigerator door? I don’t.

Are you the type to wake up before the sun has even risen? On work days I have no choice.

Have you ever watched an anime series, start to finish? I was going to say FLCL but apparently they came out with more episodes and I was unaware, so I’ll have to watch those at some point. .

Do you feel the need to rant about anything right now? If so, go for it. I just really fucking hate my brother in law. I’m sure you all know that by now. He is the most fucking pretentious, horrible fucking person on the face of the earth. I can’t STAND being around him or listening to anything he has to say. I’d honestly rather spend the day with Trump, that’s how horrible he is. He thinks he’s so much smarter than EVERYONE and belittles my sister and her daughters and me all the fucking time and yet claims to be a feminist. Not to mention how much he fucking yells at them. And the GASLIGHTING when his daughters say he hurt their feelings by yelling oh my goddddddddddddd. His temper is off the fucking charts, especially when he drinks, and it’s WILD and terrifying. And the funny thing is, we have a lot of the same values and views and even sense of humor, but the way he talks about them makes me want to jump off a fucking cliff. Like, even if you agree with him, he will go ON AND ON AND FUCKING ON about shit. He has an opinion about fucking EVERYTHING and anything he doesn’t like is automatically stupid and not worth his time. Also, his favorite band is the Beatles and he thinks John Lennon is a god, so that right there should tell you everything you need to know about him. I want to ask my sister what the fucking god damn fuck she sees in him because he has NO fucking redeemable qualities except maybe that he’s intelligent, but he’s such an ASSHOLE about it. He also thinks no one has value unless they are educated (aka a college grad) which is such a fucking load of shit. You can read a hundred books and have a hundred degrees but that doesn’t make you a good person, which I hold up way higher than being “smart.” GODDDDDDD I fucking hate him. I am constantly torn about what to do about him because I want to go off on him SO BAD but I am so scared of what it would do to my relationship with my sister and my nieces, who I love more than anything in the fucking WORLD. But I also feel like I am not protecting them by allowing this to continue to happen to them. I also frequently feel like this is all in my head and that maybe everything is okay. But no, he’s a fucking dick It’s such a sticky, shitty fucking situation and I just wish he’d LEAVE.

Do you have a favorite towel? What color is it? Lol. Yeah, its red and blue with lobsters on it.

Have you seen any films with Judy Garland in them?: Yes, a few.

How did you feel when you woke up today? Why? So. TIRED.

Who was the last person you messaged on Facebook? My husband.

When was the last time you saw them? This morning.

Do you have a friend named Nick? What’s his favourite food? No.

What are you listening to? Nothing.

What year are you/did you graduate high school? I graduated high school in 2007.

Are you obsessed with anything? Oh yes.

Do you prefer waffles or pancakes? Waffles.

Do you prefer non-diet or diet soda? Non-diet.

Do you like seafood? Yes, it’s my favorite.

Are you craving anything right now? Sushi now, lol.

Do you dress appropriately for your age? Whatever.

If McDonald’s sold hot dogs, would you buy them? Probably not.

How long is your hair? To my shoulders.

Do you like your neighbors? Yeah.

What’s your school motto? –

Has a bird ever flown into your window? No.

Which word did you say first, mama or dada? I have no idea.

How old were you when you learned to walk? A year.

What was your first pet’s name? Featherbrain and Lucky. Two Parakeets that were my 2nd grade class’ pet that we ended up taking for the summer and then keeping.

How many kids were in your class in kindergarten? Like 20-30 I think? I don’t remember.

Who was your best friend in elementary? I didn’t really have a “best” friend in grade school. They changed frequently.

Who was the best athlete in your freshman class? I don’t know.

What teacher did all the high school boys/girls have a crush on? All the boys thought the Spanish teacher was hot.

Where do you see yourself in a year? Healthier.

If you were able to change one thing about yourself, what would it be? ^I’d be healthier.

Are you content just blending in with the crowd? Yes. I hate being the center of attention.

#surveys

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dahliayoung · 5 months ago

Text

Dahlia laughed at Linc’s “drama geek” comment, rolling her eyes playfully. “Yeah, well. Any chance high school! Lia had to pretend to be someone else, she sure took it,” she shook her head, a small self-deprecating smile on her lips as she took a sip of her coffee. High school had been tough, but friends like Linc had eased the strain. “We’ve got a modern twist on Hamlet coming up. You should definitely come see it. I promise I won’t make you watch anything pretentious.”

She nodded along, listening to Linc talk about LA. She could sense her friend’s internal turmoil about his life out west. “I bet. I can imagine LA can be… a lot. But it’s impressive you went for it. Not many people have the guts to chase their dreams like that.” She admired Linc’s bravery, even if it hadn’t panned out as he’d hoped. The ambition he described sounded exhausting, but she knew it was a part of the journey for many artists and it was also what often held her back from pursuing more.

When Linc expressed interest in her music, Dahlia could literally feel the fondness bubbling up inside her. It meant so much that he still even thought about her or her music. She’d always respected his musical talent and valued his opinion greatly. “Can’t believe you want to hear me play again, but I’ll definitely let you know when my next gig is,” she smiled, good-naturedly. “And yeah, I’ve been writing. My most recent song seems to be leaning more country than anything I’ve written before but it’s a fun experiment.”

As the conversation shifted to Linc’s dad and his mixed feelings about the music scene, Dahlia couldn’t help but relate. “I’m really sorry about your dad,” she said sincerely, placing a hand on his arm for comfort. Their fathers were very similar, hardworking blue collar men and so she could only imagine what seeing a man like that be stricken with an illness like cancer do to his son. “Life’s a bitch. But if you need anything just say the word.” She squeezed his arm once more and then released it. His feelings on music, she also could relate to. “Music should be about putting a piece of your soul out into the universe and connecting with people,” she mused after a moment of thought. “It should be terrifying and overwhelming and raw – but the music business…” she trailed off with a smirk. “Well, you understand what that’s like better than anyone, I’m sure. But… that honesty is what makes your music special, Linc. Don’t lose that,” she paused, searching for the right words. “Even if it feels like the world is trying to push you in different directions, stay true to what you believe in. You’ve got something real, something authentic. Don’t ever doubt that.”

Linc smiled, nodding enthusiastically. He'd been meaning to catch a show at the theater, show his support for Lia at the very least, but he hadn't gotten around to it. Story of his life lately. Plus, it was... a little weird to turn up to the theater alone, right? He preferred to see movies solo-- which was maybe more of a learned preference after Seb had made fun of his 'pretentious foreign language movies' one too many times. "Oh, yeah, that's right-- you were a drama geek," he recalled, grinning. "Respectfully." It's not like Linc could talk, he wasn't exactly popular in high school.

"Got anything good coming up?" he asked, before Lia shifted the conversation his way. It wasn't that Linc didn't like talking about himself-- it was just that he lived in his own head. It was nice to get out every once in a while. "Oh, LA was... something," he breathed, running a hand through his hair. "Everyone is just so different there, you know? Not in a bad way, just... sometimes it felt like you could feel the ambition." Linc shook his head. Even before Dad got sick, he'd been considering leaving-- going up to Seattle or something, focusing on writing, producing his own stuff. He didn't have the stomach for all the networking and schmoozing and... other things that got in the way of the music.

Linc grinned, almost relieved to hear Lia was still at it. She'd been so much a part of his own music career-- if you could call it that-- that he really wanted to know what she'd been up to. Plus, he'd always admired her-- it was like the guitar was meant to be in her hands. "Yeah, yeah, I'm really glad to hear that. You better let me know when you play, okay? I miss hearing it." He paused to take a sip of his coffee before asking, "You been writing?"

His smile twisted at the edges and Linc lifted a shoulder in a shrug. It felt like there was so much to say and simultaneously nothing at all. "It was.. you know, unfortunate timing with my dad," Linc admitted, then drummed his fingers on his coffee mug. If he could be honest with anyone about this, it was Lia. "We were doing well, but sometimes... it felt like we were getting away from it. Maybe from what I wanted it to be." He felt guilty saying it, just like he'd felt guilty for all the time he hadn't said as much to his former bandmates. "I think I just... always want the music to be honest. And that honesty is... overwhelming, maybe?" He shook his head, "Weird to put it out there."

#𐫱 › threads.#𐫱 › linc | 001.#ft. linc #cancer mention tw

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sagau-fruit-bowl · 2 years ago

Note

Hi, I'm writing you for the recent event. Thank you so much for your writing, it's brilliant and very entertaining💞

‌she/her

‌I pace around the room while daydreaming, I also space out pretty often(my friends say it's like I'm looking through them)

‌I like to listen to music pretty much constantly, the silence w/o it is deafening really(especially when I'm alone), I don't like when people see me eating, it's a very intimate thing to me and I can't concentrate on eating prettily and deciphering what the other person is thinking at the same time

‌I need my alone time to recharge and sometimes it can grow into self-isolation(raiden kinnie here🥲), I struggle with being a people-pleaser and usually try to project myself as friendly and kind even when on the inside I'm the complete opposite. I also just yeet characters off of a cliff sometimes, forget to open a glider and let them die (and feel guilty about not feeling guilty). I always try to be an active listener and remember everything that's said to think about it in my free time and use it in future conversations, I got the majority of my friends that way

‌Ganyu/Ayaka as main dps, Venti as the apple of my eye, Raiden Shogun as my kinn and Diona for shield

‌Raiden kinnie✌

‌I take approximately 168360975 photos of Venti a day and if I ever have a chance I will marry him on the spot. I dream of reenacting a dancing scene of Shion and Nezumi from no.6, that's love(just look up "nezumi and shion dancing scene" on youtube). I'm a lightweight myself but i will absolutely drink with him(just hand me that man and nobody's getting hurt *cursed emoji with grubby hands*)

‌I look up to Ganyu/Ayaka for their sense of responsibility and diligence, they remind me of my best friend in that regard, I also used to struggle with unhealthy eating habits and can relate to Ganyu(wish I could see her chubby past self, bet she was the cutest thing in the world), Venti is my future husband, Raiden has such a pretty voice and cool voice lines, I would really like to hear about her life and her thoughts on every single thing in the world, like hanging out with her frequently and such(and if I want kimono like hers that's between us...), I didn't originally like Diona very much, but guess she grew on me after being on my team essentially from the start, I can be a little overprotective with children and I don't know if she'll like it

‌inside the game please

Thank you so much for requesting! Also, Venti Simps are terrifying. Y'all are incredibly protective because you just know so many people would drop kick him if given the chance😒 and I'm so sorry it took me so long to answer this!

Also I did my best for writing Raiden but my lack of Inazuma knowledge is gonna be the death of me on this blog.

Please enjoy this event request for

HOW SHALL WE ADMIRE YOU? OUR DEAR GUIDE.

HEADCANONS

Let's start with some basics

•Your need to be alone is one of the things that is respected the most.

•Obviously they respect you in general but with the kind of team you have, they understand the need for distance.

•Raiden has made your personal space her personal responsibility. She's always willing to listen when you'd like to speak and if you're so insistent, also willing to speak on her views.

•Raiden has her fair share of odd opinions that's she's happy to tell you all about, plenty of which stemming from the fact that you seem to respect her very much yet also seem head over heels for Venti.

•Speaking of Venti, he's such a pretentious brat when it comes to your favoritism. The fascination you had with capturing pictures of his appearance makes him ruffle his shoulders like some kind of prideful peacock whenever it's mentioned.

•He'd find a way to obtain a kamera to give to you, purely with the intentions of you taking pictures of him while he goes about his life.

•Speaking of his life, he is more than willing to sit with you and play you any song he's heard.

•If you can teach him or play him something from outside Teyvat, he would be so fascinated and learn it only to play for you, claiming it would 'ruin the song' if he played it for others at the tavern.

•Ganyu and Ayaka are both incredibly honored by the way you talk about them. Both of them don't exactly expect much of a thank you but when you personally tell them of things that cause you to admire them, it feels much more genuine than when others do, especially considering how you seem to remember everything that is said to you and can point out specific behaviors or actions that cause you to be proud of them.

•Ayaka would love to personally show you around Inazuma with her brother as it makes her feel as if you're a part of her family, something which she values a great deal.

•Ganyu would also love the opportunity to show you the locations that were meaningful for her but she doesnt have much of a chance so she settles for letters so you don't have to read it when you desire space, gifts so she can be thought of throughout the day and keeping you safe when in Liyue as a means to put the strength you've given her to use.

•Diona is kinda tired of the amount of people who come into the Cat's Tail to ask her about you but considering that it gives her the ability to be even worse at her job because she's distracted.

•She would try her best if you asked her to make something but considering the fact she's never actually tried to make something good, she'd be a little hesitant.

•As a whole, you've developed a team who is obsessed about taking care of you because of how caring you are towards them, the level of effort you've put in on them and the fact they've rarely seen you caring for yourself.

SCENARIO

Venti didn't mind staying up late anymore, after all who was he to complain if [Name] wanted him to sing them to sleep?

A gentle breeze drifted through the room from an open window, ruffling the sheets and Venti's hair as he looked down upon your sleeping form.

He smiled gently as he stood, knowing if he didn't leave your chambers soon, he'd likely have to explain himself to whoever came to wake you up, he didn't mind it on occasion but considering the Raiden Shogun's threat of kicking him out of Inazuma the next time, Venti decided he'd rather not chance it.

He was gentle with the door, knowing where it would creak as he opened and slipped through with a final glance back into the finely decorated room.

He was fine walking down the halls until he heard vague echoes of familiar voices, which he then followed, curious as to why Ayaka would be up this late.

He knew full well that the younger Kamisato tended to sleep rather early when she wasn't swamped with paperwork or meetings and it wasn't exactly common for a meeting to be held in [Name]'s living quarters without them present.

It didn't take long for him to find himself facing the door to The Guide's study and he knocked slightly out of muscle memory before he opened the door.

He wasn't sure what he expected but the sight of the normally spotless office desk being covered in different kinds of paint, paper and glitter wasn't it.

Ayaka sat at the desk, a pair of scissors in her hand as she cut away at paper.

Raiden sat not too far away, watching her closely.

The two both shifted their focus as Venti entered the room though and Venti smiled "Some sort of celebration I missed?" He asked, his curiosity seeping through his words.

Ayaka's face light up. "Indeed! It's almost the anniversary of my appointment as a vessel!"

Venti giggled "I'm guessing this is a surprise then?"

Raiden nodded "And I'm making certain she doesn't ruin Their Grace's desk."

The girl sitting at the desk shot her a hard look before turning back to Venti "Is there something you need or can I resume my preparations?"

Venti smiled "No, No, don't let me stop you! Have fun with your celebration!" He giggled before leaving the room, casting a glance at the door as he walked away.

Ayaka watched him leave before focusing on the gift boxes she had prepared, the brief worry it wouldn't be enough entering her head before she inhaled and exhaled, a glance over to the Raiden Shogun who attempted to smile calmed her.

If your favorite vessel approved, surely you would too?

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mirrorforevers · 4 years ago

Text

here, there, and everywhere • graham coxon/reader

this fic is based on two prompts y'all sent me:

and

this fic really tested all of my blur knowledge holy Fuck. blur as talking heads au i guess. how cool would it be if they

1. had a girl bassist instead of the cheese tory dude

2. werent as unhappy as they were in the mid 90s (just a bit)

3. were just a little 🤏🏻 bit more female friendly lets just pretend this is a universe where the blurjob passes didnt exist heh

it took me everything i had to make this sound as realistic as it could be. u know these girls who think they could fix patrick bateman or don draper? perhaps y’all could fix blur

consider this a gift n not only me writing for your prompt, @nottuned! thank u so much for all your support n encouragement n for always bein so sweet 🥺 i hope u enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it!

let’s see how many references to unfortunate britpop moments y’all can find in this

also i hope i captured the silliness of the gossip and drama in that era well. if you enjoyed it, please leave an ask telling me more! ur feedback is rly important to me 😔✊🏻

tw (?) reader has shitty parents

word count: 7.938 (this one's quite long!)

smut. set in the 90s. au.

You were unlocking your door when you heard your house phone ring. The shrill sound echoed through the empty corridors as you hurriedly unwrapped your scarf, tossing your keys and backpack on nearby furniture as you ran to answer the call.

“Hello?” You answer, panting.

“Y/N?”

“Dave?” You smile, that call was a very welcome surprise. Your friend owed you an answer.

A few weeks ago, Dave Rowntree, your music classmate who became a close friend, told you that he had teamed up with two other proficient musicians to form a band. Dave was ecstatic, and every day he had new stories about his new friends to tell you between breakfasts and lunches that you shared between the countless hours of rehearsals. Even though you weren't part of the group, you already felt that you knew Damon and Graham like the back of your hand. Yin and Yang. One was expansive, ambitious, vain, impulsive. The other, shy, introspective, anxious and careful.

Damon Albarn wanted to be an actor, Graham Coxon had a firm foot in the visual arts. One was a fan of grand classical compositions, the other was a Beatles fan. They had been friends since they were children, in a seemingly unbreakable bond. Damon dropped out of his theater class not only because out of a sudden he had found a bigger calling in music instead of acting, but also because he couldn't stand being away from his best friend for so long. You found yourself often imagining their faces and voices while trying to make all of the wild and endearingly funny stories Dave told you more tangible in your head.

It was not long before Dave started dropping little hints that they needed someone else for their project. “It’s not that Graham isn’t good at bass,” he’d say, “but we could do better.” It wasn't at the top of your plans to be part of a band right now, especially as you were preparing intensely to join the Royal Academy of Music, and he knew it. When you mentioned the conversations you had with Dave about the boys on your family dinner, in quiet wonder and timid want of being part of something really exciting, your parents wrinkled their noses. Focus on the greater things, they’d say. Don’t let these boys distract you from your goal.

Our goal, they meant to say. Since you were born, you never knew if the things you wanted were really your will or theirs.

But anyway.

That dynamic went on for a while, until the day Dave invited you to audition for them while you shared a Diet Coke in the tube home.

“Will it take too much of my time?” You asked, coyly.

“Bold of you to assume we’ll let you in that quickly.” He chuckles, amused by your confidence. You playfully elbow him in return. He knew how good you were at what you did, though, and there’s lightness in his tone when he continues, “But no, unless you let it. You’ll probably have to stand up to Damon every once in a while.” He sips the drink, handing it over to you.

“What about Graham? How much is he determined to make it big?”

“Damon’s the one who wants it the most. Graham’s studying Fine Arts at Goldsmiths, so. There’s still cautiousness in him.”

“Huh. Okay then.” You reply, thoughts running wild. “Do we have a time and date?”

“Is tomorrow ok to you?”

“Sure. After our class?”

“Perfect.” The train reaches his station. He ruffles your hair: “See you tomorrow then.”

“See you.”

You don’t tell anything about it to your parents, you just warn them that you’ll arrive a bit later than usual. Dave’s intel was crucial to your choice of songs: knowing Graham was the beatlemaniac and also the rational brake to Damon’s tireless ambition, you knew who to please and have as an ally, so you build an innovative and fresh mashup of Paul McCartney’s greatest basslines to play for them. Of course it could backfire, but you didn’t care. You had a hell of a good ear anyway and if Damon wanted you to play anything out of the blue, you would improvise beautifully over it.

The day comes. You didn’t know why you were that nervous for an amateur audition. You weren’t even sure if it was the right path to follow, given that, depending on how focused Damon really was and how contagious his aspiration was, being part of a band could really take you out of your predestinated course. The reason why you were so nervous, now thinking a little more about it, may be because deep inside, you want your path to be a little less predictable. You didn’t want to fill your heart with hopes that you might make it big and travel all over the world because you didn’t even know them. But… what if it clicks? You knew some people in the scene whose work was getting seriously recognized out there.

Meeting them for the first time was an enigmatic experience. Damon was incredibly brash and cocky - not the first theater kid you’ve met in your life. Graham was way more approachable, though also a bit conceited when pushed just right. You wondered if you’d fit in that boys’ club, and decided you wouldn’t be an easy target for discredit or any kind of shit they might give you. “Took me a while to fully get their trust. You’ll do just fine”, Dave said, out of their earshot.

That gave you more fuel to play amazingly well. Damon definitely wasn’t one to be impressed quickly, but he was, when you finished your set. So was Graham - Graham was starry eyed with your performance, actually. Albarn showed you a song and asked you if you could improvise to it, just as you imagined. Of course you could, on the first play. You even suggested some adjustments to its structure. Your feedback was welcomed and noted.

Even though everything went surprisingly well, you still weren't sure if you would be a member of “Seymour”, as they called themselves. (You knew it wasn’t the best name, but you didn’t have a better suggestion at the time so you’ve kept your opinion to yourself.) Graham became eerily quiet out of a sudden and wouldn’t cross eyes with you the entire time you were there. Damon, well, was Damon. Perhaps he thought you were too ordinary and mainstream for deciding to play Beatles when he’s trying to be the new avant-garde Jesus.

But Dave's news was different than you expected. “They really, really enjoyed your audition. As I thought they would.” You can hear the smile in his voice. "When can you rehearse with us?"

Months after, on your first gig as a fully formed and integrated band, Damon was hit in the face by a guy twice his size, Graham vomited onstage and you and Dave had to take care of both. A beautiful way to close the already exquisite day you had, after you fought with your parents, got kicked out of your childhood home and gave up on entering the Royal Academy of Music two days after you received your acceptance letter featuring rave reviews of your entrance exam.

Dealing with these boys - no, grown-ass men - was hard, but not completely unpleasant. If it were totally unpleasant, you wouldn’t give up on your entire life to embark on such an adventure.

You - plural you - were so gifted and Damon’s compositions were so good. You could see that artsy pretentious mess of an act going somewhere. Of course, you were a bit lost in your life, but so were they, as you ran from city to city meeting new people and trying new things in your journey to fame.

Loneliness, once a close friend, became a distant acquaintance. One you didn’t know anymore.

You confess you were getting worried, though, with how much money you had left on your savings and how much you were spending lately now that your parents weren’t an active part of your life. Wanting to eat something you cannot dream of buying without that money being really useful in a much more critical situation, not having nearly enough money to replace something important that broke or got torn off was frustrating. Some basic things became luxuries out of a sudden.

One day in particular, you very briefly mentioned that you were dying to eat a slice of chocolate cake, but your voice was so small and everyone was so immersed in their duties you thought no one gave two shits to what you said. Two days later, Graham arrived late at rehearsal with a small chocolate cake in his hands, handing it over to you like it was a completely ordinary act. Nothing in the way he acted told you he expected a reward, it was so natural and… gentle. You knew no one in your band could buy a chocolate cake without it being apocalyptic to their personal finances during that time.

That day, you were assured by fate that feeling lost together was better than feeling guided alone.

The band finally got on track - strictly musically speaking. Personally speaking, many contemporaries who followed you at parties and other events described you as an ever-growing odd, annoying and intermittently disarming bunch - and Blur and its members became household names, at least in the UK. It became harder and harder everyday to impose yourself as an entire industry and its target public aimed to tear you down. Men couldn’t understand.

(Graham Coxon was the one who tried the hardest to.)

It was four in the morning. You’ve got used to following your bandmates to hospitals, running away from trouble or knowing when to relish in it. But it was the first time you offered yourself to clean up dried blood from one’s face, given how much you hated seeing the fluid and even fainted when younger whenever exposed to it.

You, so delicately, wipe the saline solution-soaked cotton across Graham’s face, who flinches at the cold sensation on his still sensitive skin. He stares at you with the eyes of a child, and you couldn’t help but give him a slight, warm smile in return, which he retributes. Your face conveyed gratitude and affection towards the one you were taking care of. Your hands still struggled to stay completely still after the surge of adrenaline your body received a few hours ago.

Being the only girl in a massive band, and one the music magazines and mainstream media loved sexualizing, meant having paparazzis in your window in odd hours (not that that’s acceptable in any hour, but you had to lower your standards even more these days), meant having different photographers trying to pressure you to get into all kinds of uncomfortable angles with skimpy-ass dresses and just count on the intervention of your fellow bandmates so they would stop, also having invasive male fans who would try to harass you in any way they could.

Of course the day where one of your bandmates would get into a fist fight with one of these men inserted into these categories would come. And even though they were all protective of you, each in their own peculiar, increasingly contradictory way, Graham’s dedication to it was sometimes commendable.

You were making your way through a small corridor of people on your way to the stage when a random guy cupped one of your breasts. It’s not like the venue was incredibly tight, it could not have been on accident and it made your blood boil. You turned around to scream at him, and Graham, who was just behind you, threw a punch directly towards the man’s face, without thinking twice.

And oh boy, took a lot of people and a sweet amount of time to separate the two after that.

After all was said and done, Graham had a few scratches, a black eye and a cut brow. He kept dodging your many “sorrys”, “you didn’t have to do this” and other expressions of guilt. “You have nothing to be sorry about, he deserved it”, he kept assuring you, like a mantra, just giving in to your pleas when you supplicated to take care of his wounds during intermission and after the show.

“I get why you did what you did, Gra. I hate that you took such a risk because of me, but I understand.” you say, voice cracking from not using it for a while after spending some good minutes in complete silence taking care of him. “However,” you soak another cotton ball in the saline solution a roadie got you, punctuating the word with a squeeze to the cotton to remove excess liquid. “I was worried sick about you. What if he… had a knife or something? You could’ve got seriously injured. Or killed.”

“Don’t worry about me. I’m perfectly able to have a good fight,” after wincing from the contact of the cold wet cotton with his dried blood, he purses his lips in a forced, shy smile, trying to light up the mood. He notices your hands are still shaking from the adrenaline, and takes one of them in his bigger ones, trying to calm you down. The fact that he did this for you, coupled with the fear and how tired you felt of having to go through that kind of situation once again, made you cry-laugh from how overwhelmed you felt.

His expression changes to one of pure compassion in an instant. “Hey, don’t--oh my,” he gets up from his chair to embrace you as you pour your frustrations through fat tears running down his shoulder.

“It’s so exhausting,” you mumble, through sobs. “Now I’m putting you in danger too. I feel like I did and I’m still doing everything wrong. I should be the one giving you a shoulder to cry on.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong! Anything at all, I promise you,” he says, tenderly, running his hands through your hair, still holding you tight. “It was his fault! I decided it was the right thing to do. You’re worth the risk. What people have been putting you through is unacceptable.”

“I’m not worth the risk!” You break apart from his arms, trying to get your point across. “What would I do without you if someone killed you? You need to be more careful!”

The silence hangs heavy between you two thanks to the weight of your words.

“You should’ve asked me before you lunged at him, at least. I don’t know.” You wipe your many tears as you move towards the nearest bottle of water to try to calm yourself down. “It’ll never end. I’m so afraid that these situations will get even worse. That,” you motion at his wounds and dirty clothes, “is a bloody tragedy. It’s a tragedy things escalated to this point. You can’t do that forever.”

“This is just a consequence. And something I would do for you in a heartbeat whenever necessary.”

“Graham, I don’t want you to get hurt because--”

“They hurt you. I won’t let you go through that alone. Besides,” he comes closer to you again. “As I already told you, I can take care of myself, most of the time.” He takes your face in his hands, his fingers so delicately running across your cheeks to dry your tears. You knew that gesture wasn’t his way of asking you for anything you weren’t ready to give him yet. He just wanted you to feel safe. “And I want to take care of you.”

“I’m the one cleaning your wounds.”

“A great partnership, I think.” Coxon chuckles softly, and finally gets a smile out of you. As he always does. “And they make me look cool, don’t you think?”

“Shut up.” You giggle, still feeling too emotional to return to the stage. You sigh: “Thank you for being there for me. You know I’m still not very used to it. Just please be safe.”

The roadie returns, a little flustered by interrupting your little moment together. “5 minutes and you’re back, guys.”

“Okay!” You both turn to answer her.

“I’ll be. No need to thank me for anything, Y/N.” He answers, giving your forehead a little kiss. “Let’s go.”

“Give me two minutes. I’ll be right behind you.”

“What’s it like, being the only woman in the band?”

Four eyerolls at once don’t seem to faze the interviewer. She waits for your response.

Apparently the thousand invasive questions regarding Damon’s love life and the same bullshit treatment of women as either rare specimen or sex dolls is what pleases the audience of music TV shows these days.

“What do you think?” is what you say.

“Must be a thrill to have these beautiful boys around you all the time. And we’ve heard you never even took advantage of it!”

You don’t like where this is heading. “Is that… a bad thing? I don’t know what you mean.”

“Perhaps some of our lady viewers might think it is. No judgement though!” She raises her hands. “You do you, it’s just that it’s quite unexpected to see prudes in non-Christian bands. I mean… from what we’ve heard.”

“I’m sorry? What are you trying to say? What did you hear?”

Her tongue clicks while she stares at you with defiance and mischief on her eyes, as she goes a little further and raises her voice so it can overlay yours. “Oh love. You do know what I’m talking about. There’s no need to be ashamed of being a virgin.”

Your cheek burns intensely and the only thing you wished for was for the ground to swallow you whole. Dave and Graham are especially uncomfortable. Damon’s a bit amused. The three knew almost everything there was to know about you. The one topic that surprisingly they didn’t know about is that you’re still a virgin.

They know you’ve been single for a long time. They know that’s part of what draws so much attention and twisted lore regarding you and your past, but that’s not something they felt they needed to know about you at all, and you truly never felt the need to comment about that with any of them, and they haven’t asked. Not even Mr. “the way to be successful in this game is to make all the boys wanna be you and all the girls wanna sleep with you. In your case that’d work in reverse” Damon Albarn.

“Is that even something that should be discussed in an interview about our music? Is that what your boss told you to ask her about?” Dave answers, his tone venomous.

“Musicians are way more than just music. You’re entertainment in every sense of the word.”

“Who told you that about me?” You asked, not sure if you want to know the answer.

“A lovely elderly lady who lives in Elgin Crescent. She knows you so well.”

That’s your mum. That’s how far low your relationship has degraded. You’re not surprised. That doesn’t feel less like a punch on your gut, but you don’t feel like tumbling again. Not today.

“I know who you’re talking about. Tell her I asked her to go fuck herself and burn in hell. In that order.”

“But that’s your--”

“Yes, she is my mum!” If people are going to expose you anyway, then why don’t you do it on your terms? “We’re truly entertainment in every sense of the word, aren’t we. Not everyone’s mum’s a cunt. Some of us aren’t that lucky.”

“You want to be the next Gallagher sister with the spicy remarks?”

“Not sure. But I do want to be the last person you ever get to interview.”

The management of the band wasn’t at all surprised your interview became UK’s topic of the week. People were heavily divided between family is family and we shouldn’t hate our relatives and blood isn’t everything, family can be shitty too. Your bandmates were proud of you. The management was angry but tried to understand, and didn’t press you for further explanations. They suggested a two-week break from everything so Blur could rest their image and start a fresh cycle after that, and you gracefully accepted it.

The whole thing seemed so ridiculous the more you thought about it. Did your mum tell the reporter about that gratuitously? What was their conversation like? How did that even happen?

You became the butt of jokes in some places. You saw other famous people doing challenges between them, countdowns, all sorts of crude remarks. What a pathetic, sad chapter of your career.

You dial Graham, and you feel like your heart was about to burst out of your chest.

“Hey, Gra. It’s me.”

“Hey, Y/N.” He sounds pleasantly surprised. “How's it going?”

“Better, I guess. I have to take my mind off all that chaos though. Are you available right now?”

“Yeah.”

“You’ve been owing me a movie night for quite a while now and I miss spending time with you. Wanna come over?”

“Aww. Sure, I--um. Do you want me to bring anything?”

“I’m pretty sure I got everything we need here--ah… I think I don’t have any more beers.”

“I’ll buy some then. See ya in a few minutes.”

Actually, you couldn’t take all that chaos off your mind because that was the only thing in it. You’re feeling so nervous.

The main reasons sex wasn’t a priority for you until now were:

You didn’t have any real opportunities of losing your virginity in your teens. You were impossibly introspective until, like, 3, 4 years ago, and the way your family worked hasn’t really allowed you to get really close to people. Be it boyfriends, girlfriends or just friends. Anything that threatened to take time off the various tasks and classes your parents assigned to you just couldn’t be part of your life. To be honest, you still struggled a bit to form meaningful connections with people thanks to how you grew up.

The moment you stopped being shy, you noticed it was a real man’s world out there, especially in music, classical or not. You didn’t want anyone to think you fucked your way up to the top, you didn’t want any messy affairs. Also, you had yourself, and you didn’t get all of the hype regarding the concept of screwing someone. But apparently there’s a lot you’ve been missing, given the importance people seem to give to it. After that incident, even though you swore to yourself you wouldn’t give in to any kind of misogynistic pressure, that was one that really got under your skin.

You never really found someone who you felt 100% safe with in that sense until the one who’s about to arrive at your house appeared in your life. Bloody hell, and you don’t even have anything romantic going on. By the time you were a Blur member, you’ve fooled around a bit, but not all the way. You knew how to kiss, knew how to touch yourself and even brought manual satisfaction to some random fool you thought you were into one time. But perhaps this is the time to go all the way. Why not? Everyone knew how close you two were. He made you feel special. He was so kind. And gorgeous. And--

You hear a knock on your door. It’s him. Beers in hand, hair somewhat in place, twitchy as ever.

He comes inside and you feel like your legs will give up anytime. It was not the first time he visited you. It was one of many, actually, and he noticed you were acting… different.

“Y/N, are you okay?” He asks after a brief dialogue between you two, after plating some snacks for both of you.

“Graham...” You sigh, being really careful with your words. “What is your perception of me?”

“My perception of you?” He smiles. “I… think you’re great. You’re fun to be around. You’re one of the best musicians I know, if not the best. Why are you asking me that?”

“N-nothing. It’s nothing. Also, I asked the wrong question. What was your first perception of me?”

“Uh… the day of your audition?”

“Exactly. You barely talked to me that day.”

His eyes lower to his own feet. “I was really timid, actually. I wasn’t used to being near any girl, especially one who… w-would spend so much time around me if everything went well.”

You giggle. “I thought you hated me.”

“Never!” his smile turns into a full blown laughter. You melt at his confession. “Also because it seemed like you were trying to read my mind or something.”

“Of course! Because I thought you hated me!” Now that was a laughter you two shared. You do a voice: “‘Why is that pesky girl trying to get in my band?’”

“My goodness, no! I don’t even sound like that - you know what, I changed my mind. You suck. Because, besides the fact you don’t even know what I sound like, you still haven’t told me why you are asking me that in the first place.”

You couldn’t help but notice how he slightly cornered you physically in one of the kitchen corridors. Graham could be really persuasive when he wanted to.

“Okay. Right. Um. I’ve been thinking about some stuff.”

“What, exactly?”

“Everything that happened this month. The great virginity debacle,” you roll your eyes, and he scoffs.

“You don’t own anyone any information about what you do or don't do with your life. Everyone’s being so invasive. That was incredibly childish of the reporter to do, and we talked about that hundreds of times.”

“Yeah, but… you know what, forget it.”

“Tell me, Y/N. I just said that because I want you to know you were not in the wrong.”

“I know. It’s just… I’ve been thinking that maybe it’s silly for me to… keep closing myself for affection. Any kind of affection.”

“What are you talking about?” His brows furrowed in curiosity.

“I’m not sure if it’s the pressure that finally got under my skin, but… I’m willing to learn what all the fuss is about. Maybe it’s silly that I’m still a virgin.”

He bites his lips, still processing what you just said, expression unreadable. Perhaps you’ve treaded a ground you shouldn’t. You step back both literally and figuratively. “I’m sorry I even brought that up--”

“No, no, don’t be.” He assures you. “I’m just… surprised, that’s all. I swear.”

“And...” You know what. You already went too far, so why not go all the way. You’ve already gone way past the point of no return. “I was wondering if… you would… popmycherry?”

His eyes widen, yours still closed. When you finally open them, he’s closer to you again.

If his head was a machine, you’re sure it would be releasing lots of steam and shaking due to overprocessing. You felt like you just ruined everything.

“Y/N, you don’t need to do it if you don’t really want to.”

“But I want it! At first I thought I didn’t, but then I thought...”

“I don’t want to be part of that if you’re just doing it to fulfill weird expectations.”

“But it’s not that. Not just... that. I asked about your perception of me because I really like you, Gra. I think we should be more than friends and I wanted to know what you think about me. And I want to know what the fuss is about, yes, but I’m not telling you that just so I can lose my virginity to prove some point. I’m telling you that because I like you, I want to kiss you, and I think it would be a great idea if you showed me what it’s like. Y-you know, sex.”

“I-I can’t believe it. Did you even have any movie in mind?” His smile’s back, but you’re still not confident about what his answer will be.

“I didn’t. I’m sorry. You don’t have to--”

He sighs. “I was in love with you the moment I first saw you, actually.” He says it like he’s releasing a huge load out of his back, his arms crossed. Now your eyes widen, and you hold your breath without even noticing. “I didn’t want you to feel pressured. I know how you feel, or, felt about relationships, so… there wasn’t any reason for me to tell you that. And what I said about being timid was just half of the truth.”

“Huh?”

“I also was really intimidated by how pretty you looked. You can’t imagine how.”

“No way.”

“It’s true. I felt like I wasn’t even worthy of looking at you, really.”

“You’re joking. That’s mean, Gra.”

“I’m not. I’m really not.” He doesn’t look like he is joking. He looks relieved. “I’m really not. That’s why I’m so surprised by your request.”

“I’m nothing special.”

“You are everything to me. But I can’t accept your offer, not now.”

“Are you… seeing someone? Am I too late?”

“No. Definitely not. I just want you to be sure you’re not doing it because people are saying you should.”

“Graham, I’m a grown woman.”

“I know.”

Graham carefully presses his slightly chapped lips to yours, kissing you for a few precious, heart stopping seconds before pulling away; his voice is impossibly silky when he suggests, “Let’s watch a movie. How about The Godfather? I heard it’s airing tonight. Then, if in two weeks you don’t change your mind, tell me and I’ll be glad to help you with what you want. Do we have a deal?”

“That’s so unfair. I want you so bad.” You whisper.

“Tell me if you still do in two weeks.”

You sigh, defeated. “...Deal.”

You definitely notice the subtle shift in Graham’s personality and actions after that fateful night. If you were already close, both figuratively and literally, it now seemed like he would use any excuse to always touch you, be near you, sometimes tease you. The shift was subtle, though, don’t forget it’s still Graham Coxon we’re talking about - the constant “is it okay if”s or “is it alright if I”s were still there, as careful as ever. You don’t even talk about your deal that entire time, or even kiss again - sometimes you wondered if it was even real or just a fabrication of your mind.

The way he now caressed your hand discreetly when you listened to Damon’s ramblings, the way his hands now went directly to your waist when your games became too handsy, the way he seemed to be madly in love with everything you were and still are from the start - made you realize you were ready for this man to be a consistent part of your life.

The dust of the controversy was settled, and your own intentions were 100% clear to you now. The societal pressure has waned. The need for Graham to be your first persisted. After exactly 2 weeks have passed, you call him again, yearning to share the answer with him.

One beep.

Two beeps.

Three beeps.

Four beeps. “Hello?”

You release a sigh hidden deep inside of your lungs. “Graham, it’s Y/N.”

“Oh. It’s been two weeks.” You could hear the contemplative tone of his voice.

“...Yeah. That’s precisely the reason I’m calling you.”

“Do you still want to…?”

“...Desperately.”

“Ok.” He chuckles, flustered as hell on the other side of the phone, probably one of the prettiest sounds you’ve ever heard. “Right. Ok. Your place or mine?”

“I think there’ll be an element of mystery if I go to your place this time.” You lose some of the constraints this silly shyness has been tying you on. “Do you have everything we might need there?”

“We don’t need a dungeon, you know.”

“The basics.” You make your smile heard.

“I do have… I do have the basics.”

“See you in a few minutes then.”

“Will you want to… ease into it? Or just go straight to it?”

“God, don’t make it awkward!” Your cheeks burn, your smile turning into contagious laughter. “Maybe… I don’t know. Ease into it, I guess? A movie night… but with s-something else?”

“Okay. Sounds good.”

“Alright then. See you.”

“See you.”

You don’t choose any particularly fancy or sexy clothes, instead settling for a slightly oversized yellow striped shirt he gave you as a birthday present some months ago and some skirt that fit you well. He wasn’t one to lavish his loved ones with gifts all the time, but few things were as precious as the look on his face whenever he saw you wearing something he gave you or, hell, even eating something he paid for you. You’re thrilled to see it again when he opens the door for you, it easing some of your deepest doubts.

2001: A Space Odyssey is already playing on the TV when you arrive. Despite it being one of your favorite movies of all time, and his, you’re not mad it was already halfway through when you arrived. It wasn’t your main priority to rewatch it for the 17th time tonight.

He offers you some wine, which you accept to ease the nerves. You sit on his couch, and he shares the cozy space with you, now mindlessly throwing one of his arms around your shoulders. You cuddle up to him, and everything seems peaceful in the world for a while.

The tip of his fingers softly caress your lifted knee, absentmindedly. You couldn’t help but notice how well his body fits with yours, how your skin was apparently made for him to touch, and the anxiety rumbles in your stomach like a storm in a wild wavy sea. After some minutes, you raise your head, his big brown eyes meeting yours as if asking you a silent question. You leaned up a bit more to press your lips to his, in a silent answer. The sweetness in him makes this moment as precious as every other moment you ever shared with him. His hands enter your hair, making you shiver a bit from the unfamiliarity and the electricity of it all - but it doesn’t sway you from deepening the kiss, wanting more of his taste, more of this, more of him.

“Do you wanna take this to the bed?” He whispers, after noticing your moans were becoming more frequent and needy. You nod, and you are taken by surprise when he carries you bridal style to it, hiding your excited giggles in his broad shoulders.

Graham wasn’t exactly the most organized man in the world - so the fact that his bedroom was now impossibly tidy was something that positively caught your attention. He put some planning into this. He lays you down and you part your legs, beckoning him to meet you between them. He does, and you go back to the breathtaking makeout session. You notice he’s holding himself back a bit, taking his time, his warm tongue moving smoothly, not hurriedly, against yours. His self control falters a bit though, given how he can’t stop grinding against you. You follow the rhythm of his hips a bit timidly and not nearly as in sync as you’d really like, though the pressure his covered cock is creating against your core can already be felt and some particular thrusts are able to fill at least partially the aching, wet need growing within you.

“How do you feel about oral?” He asks, breath warm near your ear, his voice raspy and spent by his desire for you.

“Um… It would be my first time receiving or doing it.”

“Would you like me to go down on you?”

“Wow. I never thought I would hear you saying something like that.” You smile, still assimilating the situation you’re in, trying not to show how badly his voice is affecting you. “Sure.”

“I never thought I would get to propose this to you. Aren’t we full of surprises lately.” He smiles back, warmly. He notices your hands trembling a bit from how anxious you are while you’re taking off your underwear with his help, and as he lowers himself to where you need him most, he takes your hands in his as an act of reassurance. “Tell me what you like. Tell me if what I’m doing works for you. I want this to be a great experience.”

“You want me to get addicted to you, that’s what you want,” He chuckles, lovingly kissing your thigh as a reply. “Okay, Gra. Guess I’ll find out along the way.”

You quickly take a peak below you to see the lower half of his face disappear in the middle of your thighs. The sight alone sets your fire ablaze, as he hooks his arms around your thighs and lifts you closer to his mouth, his lips ghosting over the curls between your legs tantalizingly and his breath catching when your hips jerk forward.

As he begins his ministrations, you immediately notice it’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt. That feeling was completely alien to you. It was even wetter than you expected, and weird, but powerfully pleasant. Before this exact moment, you had a firm belief that hardly anyone else would make you feel the same way, or better, than you do yourself, but apparently you were very wrong. Thankfully you were wrong. “My god,” you gasp as the flat of his tongue drags over your folds, too much and not enough, and you jerk at the contact. “This is great. So weird, but-- great.”

He moans at your response, his movements carefully enthusiastic. He works his tongue between your folds and traces up to curl the tip of it around your clit, and it’s quite endearing and madly arousing to see how he eats out you like you’re the sweetest and tastier dessert he has ever tasted. You involuntarily buck against him with a desperate sound the moment he moves his tongue and lips in a particularly wicked way, something that definitely doesn’t go unnoticed by him, but you still feel the need to highlight in case it didn’t - “That. Keep doing that, please,”

And he does. The building of this climax is also different than the ones you already had by your own hands, and is more coy. As he sees the drops of sweat sliding along your soft skin and the expressions on your face as you get lost in this new but enchanting sensations, his hesitation and self-control fades away; there’s nothing uncertain in the way he buries his face in your cunt now, nothing restrained in the groan he lets out as he devours you and drinks you down as if you’re the first stream of water he has seen in days.

His tongue glides deeper in your folds again and again, swirling up through the wetness you’re coated with to tease at your clit while he grunts and strains closer, squeezing your thighs with both hands tight. The wave of heat inside of you is cresting so fast, you don't even know how to tell him, how to signal that you’re nearly done for and, in the end, it happens too fast to even try. He sucks at your clit, circling it with his tongue, once, twice, and then you’re crying out, shaking underneath him, trying to keep your thighs from clenching too hard around his head as he laps you through it with with urgent whimpers and moans, as if he cannot have enough of you.

You’re still trembling when he rises, the look on his face revealing to you how proud he feels by making you feel this way. It looks so good on him.

You fail miserably at the simple task of connecting words together after that, choosing instead to collect your remaining strength, prop yourself up and beckon him again to keep kissing him and learn, through his talented tongue, how you taste. He kisses the thin fabric of the shirt at your chest that covers you from view, your throat, your jaw, and before he reaches your impatient lips, he notes, sinfully, “Seems like you enjoyed yourself, love.”

“That was… unbelievable. Stars, I want to make you feel good too. Please show me how.”

“Keep kissing me,” he begs, voice still strained from how aroused he is. “I want to be inside you so bad. Let’s get you prepared.” You’re still so sensitive, you tread on overstimulation when his fingers lightly touch your clit, making you break the kiss in a hiss. He traces a line on your folds, inspecting the impact his mouth had on you. “So wet for me.”

“Bit slower, Gra,” He complies to your breathy plea, his fingers now more tame as he slowly spreads your wetness throughout your pussy. He stretches towards the nightstand to grab a bottle of lube, interrupting his contact to spread some on his fingers before unhurriedly slipping his middle finger inside of you. The coldness of the gel makes you shiver in surprise, the easiness brought by it very welcomed. Again - the sensation is odd. Completely unfamiliar. The feeling of having something inside of you for the first time, going further than you ever dared to try, probing, exploring; the coldness of the lube clashing against your burning hot cunt. But it also felt nice. The focused look on his face was adorable, he looked like he was a scientist in the middle of very complex research.

Despite the panting, the messy hair and the fire in his eyes.

Your body already has a lot of new sensations to process simultaneously, so when he asks you to take off your bra and shirt so his tongue can work on your nipples - which you gladly accept, you feel like you’re on sensual overload. His tongue, again, so talented, takes your mind off the slight burning you feel when he introduces his ring finger to your soaked, throbbing core, his focused, carefully overpowering and constant stimulation driving you insane.

“Does it feel good?” He asks, voice muffled by your breast. You nod, carried by the wave of pleasure sweeping you.

“Yes. God, yes.” You pant, tangling your fingers tightly on his thick hair as an encouragement, a desperate sound escaping from your lips the moment he reaches a certain point within you you didn’t even know existed, hot mouth continuing to lick and suck your nipple. Even though you were spent by your last orgasm, he was indeed getting you addicted to those new feelings, and even though this was heavenly, truly heavenly, you needed more. “Gra, I’m ready, I think.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Please.”

Releasing your nipple from his lips with a sounding pop, he eagerly frees himself from his trousers - hard as a brick - and puts protection and lubrication on, swiftly positioning himself between your thighs while stroking himself to the sight in front of him. You motion to take off your skirt, and he holds your hand, not letting you. “Don’t. It’ll be really hot to fuck you in this.” He confesses, giving your forehead a kiss in a very different context than before. He aligns his forehead with yours, each of your lips just barely touching while you breathe each other’s air. He looks deep into your eyes, slowly running the tip of his cock between the slick folds of your pussy, coating himself in the remnants of your pleasure. “Do you trust me?”

You trust me to know your limits? Not to go any further if you don’t really want me to?

“Absolutely.”

The only response you get from him is a shuddering, helpless moan into your mouth and you hold him tighter to you, grinding your still sensitive cunt up against his cock while he pulls hard at the soft fur next to your head. You feel your soaking pussy lips part around the solid curve of his length and gradually coat the underside of him in slick with every gentle circle and roll your hips make, as he finally pulls away from your mouth to drop his forehead to your neck. He then, very slowly, penetrates you, stopping when he hears the noises you make indicating you’re struggling to adjust to his presence. Out of everything you’ve felt in the last minutes, this was by far the most painful sensation. “This-- is new,” you note, your face completely incapable of hiding the discomfort. He also notices that.

“Are you okay? Do you want me to stop?”

“It’s okay. I’ll get used to it.”

“It’s not supposed to be about endurance, you know.” He says, a bit breathless and worried, caressing your hair. “Tell me when it’s okay to move. Or if you feel too much pain.”

After some long seconds and some deep breaths, you say: “Okay. Go on.”

“As you wish.”

He moves inside you at a very slow pace, the lubrication clearly making it easier for you to handle it. It still hurts, significantly, but the sensation of being filled is also surprisingly arousing.

His hand moves to your sensitive clit again in small, measured circles, your little moans being a mixture of the pain of penetration and the sheer ecstasy of seeing him falling apart because of you. The way his chest heaves while the drops of sweat start pearling his fair skin, the furrowed brows and broken groans, the thickness of him as he rests heavy up against your entrance, the way his voice presses deliciously tight in his throat as he gasps out into the quiet room - everything’s making your chest burst in love and satisfaction. You tighten your grip around him and roll your hips up into his cock, letting it break you open nice and slow; it stretches you wide with a deliciously sharp fullness and pleasure rips through you, and Graham becomes even more vocal as he picks up a steady and gradually faster pace. He turned all of your keys, it’s about time you turn some of his.

“Graham, deeper,” you whimper, continuing to tighten your legs and hoist yourself up, lifting your hips to take his cock deeper inside you. His name rips itself from your throat while Coxon clenches his jaw and starts to lose himself in the pleasure, holding you down into the bed while he allows your desperation to guide him to the perfect angle and speed to sate you. He found denying you to be impossible.

He snarls and curses as he holds you down and rails you, determined to make you sing again before he finishes, and to his delight, your heightened sensitivity gives him what he wants. And this time, he couldn't hold on.

Graham kisses you one last time as he groans and gives in, head dropping to your neck again. You didn’t reach a second climax, but stars, what an experience you just had.

When he comes back to himself enough to realise he still had you practically folded in half, he carefully pulls his softening cock free, taking the condom off and taking the strands of hair out of your face as you struggle to catch your breath. You suggest a shared bath, a suggestion he gladly accepts.

Too tired and too sore for pillow talk, comfortable silence falls as your hand finds his, and you lay, listening to each other’s breathing slowly settle.

I could get used to his little snore on my chest, is the last thought that twinkles on your mind before you fall asleep snuggled with him.

#graham coxon #alex james #damon albarn #dave rowntree #blur #britpop #smut #imagine #reader insert #graham coxon x reader #graham x reader #y/n #fluff #au #fanfiction #blur band

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anonil88 · 4 years ago

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Malcolm and Marie live blog

I don't usually do liveblogs for movies but yea.

Spoilers ahead!!

I love that its modern timed but very 70s stylized.

A tune indeed.

When you are high and drunk on success and

How the white critic reacts is why I feel like gatekeeping my scripts. At the same time some things I do make are about race or involve.

Marie sitting on the patio smoking is a mood whenever men are talking.

So he's pretentious and unaware.

Whoever chose the music for this, I feel like we would be Spotify mutuals.

Can this nigga stop pacing.

Also can he stop talking;

Marie is so tired and unimpressed.

Also little booties matter and are to be bitten.

Oooo the tension and the jazz.

Title Card over mac and cheese.

Shitty boxes mac and cheese but still mac and cheese.

Tbh i always wonder if spouses/significant others get upset when their spouses don't acknowledge them during speeches.

John sounds so much like his dad but I really hope his acting style differs from his dad a lot.

Guilty confession?

He did not profit off of his partners backstory and then not even acknowledge her.....I.....

If that ever happened to me catch me cussing my partner out during the beginning credits, the end credits, in the car, and at home.

GASLIGHTER!

The way I'm excited for Zendaya to give me some, oooo can she work with Regina King. Please on my knees I pray.

Um no that's not your job to coddle your lead.

He's a dick and the type of dick who makes himself look like a good person around other people.

If Sam Levinson is trying to make his viewers more of misandrist, it's working.

I feel like Marie has her flaws probably a lot of them and we will surely see as this continues, but Malcolm needs to learn how to apologize sincerely.

70s vibes! 70s vibes!

Them kissing and talking about criticism and dreams makes me miss a partner. A partner that I've had and haven't had.

Women really are behind every great man.

Yea sir you fucked a happy moment.

Oh visual allegories for looking in from the outside and cat and mouse chasing and looking from the outside in.

She's saying she doesn't feel noticed by you.

Gas lighter :0 he called her an emotional support dog, bruh.

I would LOVE to co-write or take a writing class held by Sam Levinson. The fights i write are very much in this same realm of reflection and anger and monologue.

Sam.....sam.....are all the sides inside of you doing okay sir?

The ugly side of dating and being in a relationship with someone who struggles with their own demons.

Honestly I could close my eyes and listen to this script being read without seeing these characters visually. Just close my eyes and get a sense of these characters like it was a radio story.

Oh. Oh this is a new wheelhouse of Zendaya acting; a different voice is like breaking through here and her expressions aren't the same we are used to. You can literally hear another character in there....hmm.

Mans is outside really fighting with his invisible demons lmfao.

Selfish ass, how after everything she said you came out of it thinking about your own craft and self instead of how you hurt her.

So she's conditional.

Me: did sam (a white man) say nigga this many times in his script or are the actors adding their own inflections. Not just the lingo used but the topic of race and directing etc. being written by a white writer about black characters is always gonna be a critique when you're writer is a white person.

Alexa play Broken Girls by Saba

He is so hurtful.

A clown nigga a clown look in the fucking mirror you bozo head ass looking like you need some Mehron clown white and a size 16 in clown shoes.

John is doing a really swell performance and reading of these lines.

He is reading her for her insecurities by bringing up his experiences with other women and that.....is yikes.

Arguments can get messy like this in real life but it takes a lot of maturity and control to either not let it get to this point or have a healthy conversation afterwards.

This film is really shot on some very crisp lenses.

They sitting there like 🚬🧍‍♀️🧍‍♂️.

Leftover Mac and Cheese and unfinished cigarettes.

The nyt etc. pay walls are so annoying, but there is a work around look at the articles on incognito or add a period at the end of the url.

He sounds like his daddy so much here, weird, this is the only part I'm eh on the dialogue it feels real but a bit out of pace in how they are bouncing off one another.

Nail scissors? So the end is not the only part he based off of Marie. 🙄

ITS A GOOD REVIEW YOU DINGUS but also its a full review they are going to critique things. She isn't wrong though he did profit off of a woman's story that was not his own to profit from.

Yes Malcolm because unfortunately all marginalized people look through a lens of life that is inherently political because of the world they live in.

He is so mad and upset and had a lot on his chest. But I think he Malcolm and Sam are talking about something thats an issue and a non issue. Being critiqued for you art is hard but also Malcolm is not super self aware. He's like a stand in figure of for example rich depop sellers who wanna be oppressed so badly they yell at others instead of examining their own personal behaviors and ethics.

Oh Marie, when you know the spark is gone and you pick fights because.

He ain't even ask her to read?

One critic I have for most of hollywood actors is they learn their cry and that is it. A change from this is Margot Robbie, I adore her fluctuations of crying being similar but the crying is carried differently for each character. If I had to say any actor that does a cry scene amazing its this woman right here (Amy Adams)

You stole her story from her and gave it away, she has a right to be upset and angry and a rubber band ball of emotions.

Citizen Kane, not the cinematography, but the story is it even that good? (Unpopular opinion but meh, maybe in my rewatch it will be better.)

But that is what people want authenticity and whatever authenticity means to them. What is real for one is false for another.

To be honest look at the criticism of Euphoria, well earned, but a lot of people were like this isn't real even though he literally wrote about his own life. People said it was inauthentic like....wtf.

Ahh the smoking is just a habit, he quit and she didn't.

CAST ZENDAYA IN A HORROR MOVIE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING. Get Lupita and Zendaya and some more black actors preferably less known ones in a horror movie. One with a interesting script and story, directed by Regina King. Please and thankyou.

I love Marie yep that was amazing.

Behind every great man is a greater woman, one that deserves her credit for how she has stood behind. I wonder the stories of those women, what they have sacrificed or not sacrificed. Their thoughts and feelings when the world is surrounding their partner and views them as a plus one. (I'd write a short script about this but I think do I have the time, can I, or am I equipped ?)

He is a shitty person for bringing up his exes, like she even said I don't wanna know any of that.

Imagine being on anti depressents and rarely having a sex drive and then when you do your partner starts talking about their exes and tearing you apart for all your faults.

I love when you see peaks of Zendaya's cadence in roles.

Tension, what if's and he didn't even bring her up in his speech.

Marie to herself and the audience:

He is not afraid that he will loose her but as my character says in my unreleased story, "i can't wait til you give me a fucking reason to leave your ass." Malcolm expects everything in order for not even doing the bare minimum and she is only asking him for something as simple as consideration. She just wants him to be considerate. He wants to get married and considers their relationship like rolling down a hill at full speed and he cannot apologize, he cannot be considerate, and he cannot admit his wrongs. He can only offer her I love yous that he probably does mean but he does not back up outside of what he's done for her in the past. The past which was more of her experience than his and he sees his part in it as a burden. He doesn't use his own vantage point of the past to further his career he uses her. He does all of these things without a real apology or thankyou because he is not afraid to loose her.

The restrictions of quarantine and the panorama have made Sam's writing very no frills. I wonder how other films from other directors and writers that are filmed in small contained crews like this will be structured. But this was a very good movie gonna add to my letter box 3.3-3.5

Oh shit this is my song,

Ratings/overall thoughts:

Script is like a C+, B- : I could go into my heavier big brain thoughts on the script but I don't feel like it. You catch hints of it above it centers conversation on race and privilege, mainly the writers and questions i have that won't be answered but Sam did make me grow disdain for Malcolm over a short time. Which is sometimes hard to do because im one sympathetic person but the sympathy i have for Malcolm is at 0. Maybe a 2 at some scenes but then it quickly goes back to 0. Some parts of the dialogue miss the mark or hit the are off balanced. While some of it like Malcolm's bathroom speech albeit mean is really strong or their conversation when he comes back from peeing really shines for me.

Performances: B+ to A- because they carried the script further than it could of gone with less talented actors. The monologues do well to showcase their current skill levels which are already high af and leave room for anticipation in where these actors go next.

Zendaya holding a knife: A+ with a gold star. That switch on and off and on is delectable.

John being a shitty boyfriend but following Marie like a lost puppy: B+ with a good job written at the bottom of the paper, Malcolm being nervous a frantic dialed up with more realistic nervousness would have sold me completely on Malcolm's anxious waiting.

Cinematography: A and a participation award.

The mac and cheese: A+ for the easy mac. Wish it was like Annie's or Velveeta.

Cigarettes: Participation award and their picture hung up for student of the month. Why the grill lighter? Everytime Malcolm opened up his mouth Marie was like sparks fly.

The music: A++ with a prize. Whoever picked the music probably makes good Spotify playlists.

#Malcolm & Marie #malcolm and marie #zendaya coleman #zendaya #john david washington #liveblog #mine

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masterjedilenawrites · 3 years ago

Text

Blueberries and Cowboys: Chapter 4 (Blueberry Path)

A choose-your-own-adventure style fic. Refer to this Masterlist for previous chapters and alternate paths.

Chapter 4: The Party (Blueberry Path)

Pairing: Thrawn x reader

Content: Light drinking, more pining

Length: 2.4k

AO3 Link (In case you like it better over there, it’s okay, no judgement)

The gala was as elaborate and ostentatious as you would expect of a formal event at the Imperial Naval Academy. It was like the whole ballroom shimmered as glasses of drinks were passed around and ornate dresses swished about in dance. You'd certainly never been a part of anything so grand from your home world before.

It was quite a sight, to be sure. But it still paled in comparison to the man who walked beside you.

You could feel the stares from the classmates and superiors around you as you moved deeper into the ballroom with your date. But you didn't let their open judgement get to you. You were proud to be on the arm of Mitth'raw'nuruodo. If anything, these pretentious Imperials should be envious of your connection to him.

You also tried not to let your own insecurities get to you. Occasionally you'd catch glimpses of yourself and Thrawn, reflecting off mirrors and windows. You'd thought you looked decent standing alone in front of your bedroom mirror. But next to him, you were so... plain.

"The music is quite pleasant," said Thrawn from beside you.

Part of the plan for the night was to substitute your targets for other subjects, so any potential eavesdroppers would be none the wiser to your true intentions. Anything related to music was to symbolize one half of the plan: Eva and Arden.

You saw the couple near the entrance, having just arrived a few minutes behind you. Eli was supposed to keep an eye on them, while you and Thrawn were tasked with Burdick. You internally shook yourself free of your complicated thoughts about the gala and your date, and instead turned your focus to the mission.

"Do you think Eli has noticed?"

"Yes, he seems to be enjoying it." Thrawn nodded across the room, where Eli was standing next to his date. He held a drink and was making a show of casually looking around, but you could tell he was paying extra attention to the entrance.

"And how about that assignment?" you asked. Burdick would be referred to by discussions of homework, another innocent topic. "Have you found your thesis for it yet?"

"No, I'm still looking into it," Thrawn said calmly.

You looked up at him to see his steady red eyes were mostly blinking politely at the faces that passed directly in front of you. Every once in a while, ever so subtly, they would flick elsewhere. A gap in the crowd. A far corner of the room. You even caught him looking at a tray of champagne glasses hovering nearby, casting a perfectly angled reflection of the space behind him.

Gods, he was so good.

"Is there something you wish to say?" he suddenly asked, catching you off guard as his eyes made their way to your own.

"No..." You struggled to find balance, not wanting to seem too dismissive or too dishonest. "I was... uh, just... watching you... watch... the room...."

Thrawn's left eyebrow quirked ever so slightly. Almost imperceptible to the untrained eye, but you knew it was a sign that he was amused.

"It would be far more productive if you were to watch the room with me," he stated. His eyes traveled to somewhere behind you and for a moment you thought he had finally found Burdick. But upon turning, you saw it was only a tall cocktail table that had opened up. Thrawn placed a gentle hand on your lower back and guided you toward it.

"Here. Now we can discreetly observe both directions," he said just low enough that only you could hear. He moved to stand opposite the table from you, and while he was right, your positions now covered both halves of the ballroom, you were finding it difficult to focus on your side when Thrawn was also in your view.

"Drink?" he asked, swiping two champagne glasses from a passing tray and placing them on the table before you had a chance to answer. Considering he didn't touch his glass after that, only resumed his scanning of the crowd with hands folded neatly in front of him, you knew it was more for show than anything.

But your nerves were on fire, and so you gladly took up your glass and downed most of it in one go.

"I have decided on my thesis for the assignment," said Thrawn as you clanked the drink back onto the table. You held back a burp as you casually looked over your shoulder to where Thrawn seemed to be looking. Commander Burdick was hovering by an hors d'oeuvre table, a small plate piled high with food in one hand, scowling at every person that passed him.

"Just the one assignment?" You turned back before the commander could notice you staring. You could've sworn you'd overheard during your recon that Burdick had found his own date.

"My last-minute arrangement," said Thrawn quietly, breaking from the code you were supposed to be using. "It occurred to me the commander may end up distracted by his partner, rather than focusing attention on Arden. Thus, I've arranged for his date to be delayed in arriving, possibly even too late to make it altogether."

You nodded and finished off your champagne.

"You're not impressed."

You looked up at him to find his eyes were inspecting you, searching for something. Approval? Praise? Surely not, not from Thrawn.

"Would you like me to be?" you side-stepped the question, mostly out of surprise.

"I don't do these things for clout," he stated plainly. "But I do value your opinion."

You blinked at him a few times, unsure how to process those words. To say you could count on one hand the number of opinions Thrawn valued outside of his own was an overstatement, as there would only be one finger up for Eli. You'd never dreamed you could be included in that count, too.

Thankfully you were distracted from having to come up with a response by the change in music to something much more lively. Several pairs of people excitedly moved toward the dance floor, including Eli and his date, and Eva and Arden nearby. You angled your head to see around Thrawn's body and watched them.

"The music is... uh... going well." You cringed at your own inability to find a way to incorporate the code. Thrawn casually followed your gaze, only sparing the two couples a second of attention before turning back to give you an amused smirk.

"And now we must do our part. With the homework."

He came around the table with an arm extended and gave you a wink. An honest-to-god wink. You thought you were surely going to collapse on the floor, but managed to grab ahold of his arm in time, allowing him to lead you away from the table.

"Commander," Thrawn's ever-calm voice raised in volume to address the man you were approaching. The Commander in question looked up from his food plate and somehow managed to scowl even deeper as he recognized who was addressing him.

"Well, well. If it isn't my favorite student," Burdick said dryly. Though he was a full two feet shorter than the Chiss, he still had an air of looking down on him. "I'm surprised you'd even come to an event like this."

"The Academy has provided a generous occasion tonight," said Thrawn evenly. "It would have been in bad taste for us not to attend."

It was only when Thrawn referred to you collectively that Burdick took note of your presence.

"Commander," you said with a polite smile that he was definitely not deserving of. "It is quite an evening. Are you enjoying yourself?"

Burdick scoffed slightly, which you took as his attempt at a laugh. He turned back to Thrawn as he responded with a grumbled, "Thoroughly."

"And where is your date, Commander?" Thrawn asked, turning to you slightly. "What was her name? Eva?"

You met Thrawn's eyes, and though they perhaps didn't seem much different than usual, you thought you picked up enough in them to understand his game. You suppressed a mischievous smile as you played along.

"Thrawn," you pretended to scold in a low voice, slapping his arm and giving Burdick an apologetic look. You could already see a vein bulging along the man's temple at the mention of her name. "I'm so sorry, Commander.... Thrawn, I told you they're not together, not anymore."

"Ah," the Chiss nodded solemnly. "That explains why I saw her dancing with a fellow classmate of ours."

He turned to cast a look at the couple in question, and to allow enough of a view for Burdick to see them on the dance floor as well. Arden was moving rather intimately with Eva, and though they were a distance away, you could still see the boy's eyes glancing over at Eli and Sadie just a few steps beside them. Your friend was putting on quite a show with Sadie, undoubtedly making Arden feel the need to one-up him with his own partner. How clever.

"Who is that?" you feigned ignorance, squinting your eyes just a little dramatically.

"I believe his name is Arden Fey," said Thrawn. "He is in our flight class."

The two of you watched the couple for just a few seconds more before simultaneously turning back to Burdick. The man's face was as flushed with annoyance as you'd hoped.

"My apologies, Commander," said Thrawn. "I did not mean to be inconsiderate. However, on that note, I have spotted another one of our professors. We really must acknowledge them. Please excuse us."

Thrawn gave a courteous nod as he began leading you away. The Commander only remained rooted to the spot, glaring at his ex as she continued to move provocatively with her new beau.

There did end up being another professor that you spent some time greeting. You tapped your fingers restlessly against your thigh while Thrawn engaged in their small talk, all the while sneaking looks behind you to track Burdick as he continued to fixate on the dance floor. When Thrawn eventually wrapped up, you were practically bounding after him as you went toward the veranda in the back of the ballroom.

"Oh my god," you finally let yourself smile, wide and excited. There were only a few people outside, most briefly checking on the view before returning indoors, and one pair who'd clearly been fooling around in the shadows and hurried away with frustrated looks as you and Thrawn went up to the balcony.

"I can't believe we're pulling this off," you were still gushing.

"You speak as if you had doubts about this evening," said Thrawn. He leaned against the railing beside you, an amused glint in his eyes as he watched your face contort in all its excitement.

"Not doubts, just..." you shrugged, not sure why you were so surprised, honestly. It's not like this was the first, or even the most complex, scheme of Thrawn's you'd been a part of. Maybe it was that glass of champagne, or your nerves from earlier that day resurfacing. "I don't know, it just feels good when a plan comes together."

Thrawn hummed, his eyes lingering on you for a moment longer before he looked away in thought. You let your gaze drift out, too, taking in the twinkling glow of the garden lights. There wasn't much impressive with that small patch of greenery in the daytime; most of the plants were imported and only minimally kept up by ungrateful horticulture students who just needed some extra credits for the year. But at night, there was enough shadow to pretend something interesting might be hiding out there. In fact, now that you thought of it....

"Oh, I heard they're bringing in some featherferns soon," you said, remembering you'd been meaning to tell him before all of this flight school drama came up. "One in the traditional violet, but the other is supposedly a pale yellow. Possibly a hybrid, or maybe sun damaged, they're going to have to study it to be sure. But they'll replace those awful garlic roses."

Whatever thoughts Thrawn had been consumed by were no longer important as he looked down on you with wide eyes. "I was not aware you were keeping tabs on the Academy's flora collection."

You threw him a little smile and a shrug. "Well, ever since someone taught me to appreciate it, I can't help but stay informed."

"I am glad," he said, turning to face you more fully. "And likewise, your enthusiasm for this evening also pleases me. Your good spirits are... infectious."

You gripped the balcony railing in order to steel yourself. Your eyes flitted about his face, once again unsure how to read it. Was he really smiling at you now, or was it your imagination playing tricks? A mere projection of the feelings you wished he had? You usually didn't mind the mystery that surrounded Thrawn; in fact, it was probably what drew you closer to him. If he chose not to show his thoughts and feelings, he did so for good reason, and you were free from the burden of having to interpret or address them.

But now it infuriated you. You needed to know what he was thinking. Where did his mind go every time you said something that caused him to look away? How strongly of a line had he drawn between your usual dynamic and the parts he was having you play tonight? Was he even conscious of the fact you were standing much closer than friends typically did in such a setting?

You shivered involuntarily. It was much cooler outside, but his gaze on you was also unnerving. The slight shake of your arms and the growing goosebumps on your skin did not escape his notice.

"You're cold," he stated.

Despite the truth of that statement, no sooner did he say it did your cheeks flush with warmth. Now you were wondering if he was going to offer you his jacket, picturing how warm it would be, how it would smell like him.

"We should return inside."

But obviously Thrawn's solution was much more practical. He moved away from the balcony and set his arm back in place for you to accept it. You cursed at yourself for letting your feelings get the best of you yet again today. Why were you doing this to yourself?

You took his arm and offered an easygoing comment to cover your silliness. "We should probably check on our assignment, anyway."

He nodded with what could've been another smile, but you were determined not to keep reading into it.

"Yes, we certainly should."

#star wars #thrawn x reader #thrawn #mitt'raw'nuruodo #eli vanto #choose your own adventure #friends #romance #friends to lovers

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