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canyouhearthelight · 4 years ago

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The Miys, Ch. 137

Trying to figure out Author’s notes is hard.... Sometimes I just don’t have anything pithy to say, or have too much to say and don’t know where to put it all.

Obviously I am an overthinker.

So, for the sake of everyone reading: Let’s cut to the Shoutouts!

The obvious first: @baelpenrose, @the-raven-fae, @anotherusrname, and @charlylimph-blog! I love all of you, you are the best.

Special mentions to: @zommbiebro bc I miss you and hope you’re okay. @nekohuntslight for being the OG person to message me about liking the story (yes, Bael, this is the dirty secret behind why I thought you lived in Australia when we first started talking.... shhhhhh). And alllllll the binge readers who blow up my inbox every day, Iloveyousomuchyoudon’tunderstand. Very much adore all of you, you have no idea how serious I am being right now. I need to go through and make one post just screaming all your names to the universe.

Tyche brought drinks and snacks from my kitchen before flopping on the couch in my quarters. The guys were at work, along with Antoine, but my office was closed down for the day. “How are you feeling about tomorrow?” she asked.

“Vati and Hannah have everything planned to the smallest detail,” I shrugged. “They’ve already coordinated with Xio and Evan for all the crowd control and monitoring shifts, and the murals are going up today.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m well aware of the logistics stuff. I literally handle all the staffing for the humans on the Ark, and Antoine was also part of the crowd control conversations.”

“Then why did you ask?” I laughed, grabbing a cracker and carefully stacking cheese and other toppings on it.

Before I could get it to my mouth, she snatched it and held it out of my reach. “Because I’m asking how you feel. You’re only attending as… well, an attendee. No monitoring, no calling the shots, no working from the floor.”

She surrendered my cracker, but I found myself setting it down, appetite gone. “I’m okay - “

“Lie.” There was suddenly a finger levelled between my eyes like a gun. Just as quickly, it was lowered, and my sister was tilting her head at me. “Come on. You know you can’t lie to me - I’ve known you longer than literally anyone on this ship except yourself.”

“Fine! It’s weird!” I admitted in frustration, standing to pace and shoving my hands through my hair. “My skin is crawling with anxiety, my hands are twitching to snatch up the files and nitpick everything to the smallest detail….”

“Except they locked you out.”

“Except they locked me out, yeah. But I’m pretty sure I could get Derek to let me in, which is why I’ve made a point to tell him not to, no matter how much I ask.” Dropping my hands, I sighed. “But if I ever want to leave this position, I have to let them do this.”

She shrugged and stole my cracker, this time chewing and swallowing before she responded. “You could have kept some involvement in it, you know.”

“Pfft, yeah right. I would have taken it over, and you know that.”

“Yep.”

“Then why even ask.” I dropped back down on the couch.

“‘Cause you needed to hear yourself say it,” she explained, nonchalant as ever, snagging an olive and watching me calmly.

I sat in silence, processing it. I hated when she outsmarted me like that, especially when she was right. “Can I at least eat first?”

She laughed and let it go, telling me how well the murals for the Festival were coming. I hadn’t even gotten to - allowed myself - to see the designs, and the more Tyche talked about them, the more I wanted to see them. By the time I finished my share of our snack, I decided to check out the progress.

We finally made our way to the decks where the Festival would take place, and I thought Tyche was going to die laughing at the way I gaped. The alcoves where the vendors would stage looked the same on first glance, but a closer look revealed very subtle shapes added that would give them a more savage, wild look in the right lighting. Metal sconces had been added to hold what looked like torches, but with special light emitters to simulate open flame. As we walked further, swirls of color revealed themselves slowly, first in light, curling tendrils, but slowly sharpening and taking on a more angular shape, twisting together into phantasmal images that vanished as soon as you tried to focus on them.

“It’s like walking through a garden, or a rainforest, but when I turn my head, I’m in a city.”

“Right?” she laughed as we came around the final corner.

At this point, we were surrounded by this mural. Just up ahead, there was a messy head of black hair tied back with a green piece of cloth. Bare feet and arms show smears of paint, and overalls covered a tank top - that, or the cloth for the hair had formerly been sleeves, I couldn’t tell. One hand propped up on hips while the other hung down, holding a very familiar paint pen.

“Christ on a triscuit, Vati, this is incredible,” I gasped softly.

She turned and smirked at me over her shoulder. “Not yet, but it will be when I finish.”

“I mean, all of it. The sconces…”

“Those were Hannah and Ivan.” Parvati walked over and touched one with her finger tip, stroking it gently.

Tyche made an impressed noise. “I’m only a little shocked that he had enough time.”

“The materials are on loan from the engineering departments, and we wanted them to be rather rough in the finishing. It helped. Sophia, no matter how curious you are, please do not lick the walls.”

A giggle bubbled up through my chest. “The thought never crossed my mind. I was trying to put together all the flavor profiles here. It’s… a lot.”

“Forgive me if I focused more on color than how the walls would taste. I don’t generally cook, remember.”

I stared down a swirl of pomegranate, popcorn, and gochujang. The colors - blue, pink, and yellow, respectively - worked well together, but the thought of the flavors made my stomach churn. “I solemnly swear not to lick the walls,” I promised. “How much of this are you expecting to still be up by the third night?”

“We have a team that will specifically come touch up the mural in specific places the morning before the second day.”

Tyche turned toward me and away from her study of the art. “Also, you would be surprised how much paint is on the walls. It will take a lot for Else to eat it all, once they are allowed in the area.”

“Before you ask,” Parvati cut me off. “We just asked them nicely. Well, Sam and Derek did. They’ve become quite the ersatz diplomats to Else.”

“Anything left?”

“Hannah is putting the final touches on the curtains for the alcoves and the seating areas. She’ll have a team installing them tonight once I finish.”

It was clever, and explained why she was only touching up part of the mural halfway between now and the closing of the event. “You two have really put your stamp on it.”

“Feel better?” She held one hand up gesturing at the entire entire project, eyebrow arched to show me that she hadn’t been fooled for a moment.

I rubbed my neck, and glanced at her from underneath my eyelashes. “Busted, I guess.”

“That would imply that anyone had believed your charade,” she smirked.

Taking a deep breath, I looked around us again. “I honestly do. I could never have done all this. Holding on would have…”

“Kept you in a position you frankly hate,” Parvati interrupted gracefully. “It’s the same reason Sebastian went back to the Undine. He’s passionate about it, and it shows in the quality of his work.” When I gaped in insult, she held up a hand. “Not everyone can succeed through fear of failing and a determination that things be done right if they must be done at all.”

“Everyone talking about me needing to retire, like I’m old or something,” I joked, throwing my hands into the air. “Physically, I’m only thirty-five.”

Tyche nodded to concede my point. “What about the food? I haven’t seen a menu come out yet.”

The change in topic made Parvati’s face collapse. “What? It should have gone out yesterday…” She flicked open her datapad, which flickered from the overspray that covered it. Frantically scrolling, she groaned. “This was scheduled, why didn’t it send?”

“Did you check the date?” I asked calmly. “Specifically the year.”

“Three times, it’s scheduled for tomorrow,” she insisted. “Right here: May seventeenth, twenty-forty aw fuck….”

“At least you got the decade right,” I pointed out. “You wouldn’t believe how many scheduled emails I’ve tried to automatically send out for ten or fifteen years ago.”

She nodded and seemed to get her bearings back. “So, protocol for this is… just send it right now and apologize for the late notification, don’t try to make excuses or explain?”

“Exactly. They won’t care why, they’ll just be excited the list is out.”

With a couple quick gestures, she sent the email and dismissed her datapad. “Okay, that was the last thing, then.” Turning back toward the wall she was working on before, she waved to us over her shoulder. “I’m not trying to be rude, but I really do need to finish this up. Thank you for coming to see everything… it was oddly reassuring to have both of you give us your stamp of approval before the Festival instead of making us wait until after.”

“For the record, you two have always had my stamp of approval, or I wouldn’t have tried so hard to keep my nose out of it.” I knew she couldn’t see me, but I still smiled. “We’ll catch up with you after the Food Festival. Remember: both of you need to plan on taking the day off afterwards. I’m serious. Have your unofficial advisors drop in and chat about everything, that’s fine. But no actual work, and I won’t let either of you see the survey results until the second day after. So rest.”

“Got it, boss lady. Have a good night!”

Tyche and I turned and headed back to my quarters. We remained silent as we took in all the preparations that had been done, waving to the handful of vendors who were bringing their supplies in already. Once we were back in normal corridors, the silence broke almost immediately.

“I think they’ve got this,” Tyche suggested nonchalantly.

“Oh, I know they do.”

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#the miys #found family #humans are weird #science fiction #aliens #apocalypse #humans are space orcs #humans are space fae #earth is space australia #post apocalypse #post post apocalypse #original science fiction #original sci fi #original writing

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binch-i-might-be · 3 years ago

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The More You Know

This is the aforementioned short story. It’s unfinished, a blatant Welcome To Nightvale rip-off, and I got extreme whiplash reading it again because one of the characters is named Alex.

Anyway. Can you tell we found out about my grandma’s dementia diagnosis when I wrote this? lmao

also, to reiterate: I wrote this around 2016, I think? It’s been years pls don’t judge me ok :’)

POV first person, wordcount 3.1k

The small town lay in silence, and honestly, that wasn't very unusual. I couldn't really remember a time when it didn't. The shops were closed, the windows all nailed shut with old planks of wood, and in the little corner-store the sign that said 'no help wanted, keep walking' was still firmly in place.

I smiled. It was all exactly like I remembered; exactly like I left it. Like the sign told me, I kept walking, but I didn't hear any steps following. Which was not good, considering I had brought my friend Alex along. He really should keep walking.

I turned, adjusting the backpack slung over my shoulder. »Alex? You need to move,« I said. He stood there, trying to peer into the shop in between the gaps left by the planks. Which was also not very good.

»Why is everything barred? You get a lot of storms here or something?« he asked as he straightened.

»Yes. Or something.«

He frowned, but thankfully caught up to me with a little jog. We continued down the road, in the direction of the woods that never drew any closer, and passed the veranda of Old Lady Miller. Old Lady Miller had a lot of free-running chickens, and it was better not to look at them directly if you wanted to keep your secrets.

She was sitting in her rocking-chair, watching us pass. My grandma once told me Old Lady Miller had already been Old Lady Miller when she was a child, but her chickens hadn't been as many back then.

Alex did another nervous little jog to walk beside me. »Are you sure we should be out here? I mean, no one else is. Maybe there was a storm-warning.«

»Don't worry. It's actually a lot livelier than it normally is.« A chicken crossed the road right in front of us. »Don't look at the chicken,« I told Alex, staring straight ahead.

He looked at me, frowning in confusion. »Why not?«

I looked back at him. »Why did the chicken cross the road?«

»What?«

»To steal your secrets and your memory of every chicken-sandwich you ever ate. Don't look at the chicken.«

He didn't look at the chicken and we got to the crossroad without incident. My family lived straight ahead, at the end of the road, in a nice little house with a nice little garden, bordering the woods that seemed so far away.

»So... what's going on here? Where are all the people? Why are there chicken roaming the streets?« Alex asked, trying to not sound too nervous.

»It's typical, really. Most of the townsfolk doesn't come out if it isn't absolutely necessary. I told you, there's no reason to worry. Everything is fine.« It was understandable Alex was nervous. In my time away from home, I had noticed a slight difference in the happenings of things–not that I thought it made much sense.

»...alright,« he sighed. Still sounded a bit suspicious, though. »So... your brother. You have a brother, right? Does he still live with your parents?«

»It's nice of you to change the subject. But no, he doesn't. Arden likes to live his own life.« And suddenly, we stood in the driveway of the house. Alex looked around, obviously confused, then turned around and looked back. The dirt-road lay winding behind us, despite us having just passed the crossroad a minute ago.

»Don't think about it,« I advised. He looked so suspicious it was almost endearing.

We went up the driveway and up the steps of the veranda. There were four deer-skulls lying in the corner, which was one more than before I'd left, but otherwise, nothing seemed to have changed.

»That's... very charming decoration you've got there,« Alex said, audibly hesitating.

»It's my grandma's. She likes to collect things. You'll see,« I answered. It was the only warning I was allowed to give him. He didn't respond.

I pushed the door open–it was never really locked–and stepped inside. The smell of old wood and burning herbs hung heavily in the air, but it always did, and I would be disappointed if it didn't.

»I'm home!« I called out. My mother came promptly out of the kitchen, carrying a tray of fresh Christmas-tree shaped cookies. It was July.

»Hello, dear! I'm so glad you're back! Your father was getting worried. You know how he gets when you stay out after nightfall.«

I could almost smell Alex' confusion. Apparently, my mother could, too.

»And who is this young man? Where did you find him?« she asked, excited at the prospect of some fresh blood in the house.

»That's my friend Alex. We met a few months ago.«

»Welcome to our humble home, Alex,« she chirped and went off into the kitchen again, presumably to put the tray down. We stood in silence for a few moments, simply listening to the clattering in the kitchen, but then Alex spoke up.

»What did she mean, 'when you stay out after nightfall'? You have been gone for literal months.« He wasn't suspicious anymore; just a little bit scared. Creeped out. That was alright with me. I turned around to face him, and smiled.

»I would tell you time works differently here, because that sounds mysterious, but honestly–my Mom's just always very confused. Sometimes she still sets the table for five people, even though Arden has been gone for quite a time now. She just baked Christmas-cookies.« It was the truth. My mother really didn't have all her wits together anymore, but that's what happened to outsiders staying here too long.

Alex frowned, but then seemed to remember the existence of illnesses like dementia and kept his mouth shut. She didn't really have dementia, but I decided to let him believe whatever made him more comfortable.

I started down the hall, with Alex following close behind, the floorboards creaking loudly with every step we took. It wasn't easy to sneak in here past curfew; but then, it also wasn't easy to survive past curfew.

In the middle of the hall were three possible directions to choose; as a child I always thought of it as a little crossroad in our house. There were the stairs to our right, laden with potted house-plants and herbs, and also loose dirt lying on the stairs nobody ever bothered to clean up.

To the left was the door to the living-room. It was a big, illuminated room with many windows; that was why we only ever stayed in there during the day. Well, except for my grandma, of course. She stayed there however long she pleased. I thought whatever roamed the woods at night was too afraid to fuck with her.

Up front was the kitchen, where my mother was still clattering around, probably cleaning up after herself. From the kitchen, one could go to our veranda; our second, more relevant veranda behind the house. The veranda overlooking the garden, bordering the woods.

When we were kids, my brother and I were only allowed to play in the garden in the summer, because the days were long then, but that was also the time when the stench of rotting flesh was the strongest.

Well, you couldn't have everything. I stole a quick glance behind me and saw that Alex was looking around curiously. His eyes caught on the wall to our left. It was clustered with stuff–mostly crucifixes my grandma had gathered over the years, even though no one really believed in the conventional gods around here.

Besides those, there were also many family-pictures; my brother and I when we were kids, our family outside in the garden, my parent's wedding-picture, my grandma when she was still young–that one photo of us all gathered in the living-room, playing monopoly. No one knew who took that picture. It was just on the camera-roll one day.

Alex made a confused little humming sound that drew my attention. He was looking at a framed newspaper-article and squinting at the headline.

»Man drowned after breaking into closed swimming-pool?« he read. »It isn't even from around here–it says Hamburg there.«

»Yeah... we only got our hands on that because it's the only document left of my grandfather. My Pa's a little sentimental, you see.«

At that, his eyes widened in terror. »You mean-« He whipped around to the article, then looked back at me in silent horror. »That's your grandpa?! And you framed the article and hung it with your family-pictures?!«

»Well, yes. It's not a big deal. Gran likes to be reminded of him sometimes.«

He pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes tightly. »That's so fucked up, man.«

I raised an eyebrow at him, a little grin fighting its way onto my lips. »You think that's fucked up? Dude, you've come the wrong place.«

Nightfall approached quickly. Well, actually, it didn't; but it sure felt like it, with Alex pacing and mumbling to himself in the living-room while Mom and I watched from the sofa, fairly uninterested. I told her about the things I'd seen and done in the past months and she listened gladly. It was nice to talk to someone from home; everyone else was exhausting to have a conversation with.

I looked out the window in caution, noticing that the sun was setting behind the woods. We needed to leave the room soon. I told Alex as much and was met with a new-found suspicion of anything concerning me and my family. It was ridiculous.

»C'mon, Alex, only yesterday you trusted me enough to come home with me. What happened?«

He stopped his pacing and stared at me for a while, his eyes looking like he was having violent flashbacks of something unpleasant. »This place happened!«

I sighed, uncrossed my legs and got up. »Chill out, dude. Nothing is going to happen to you. At least as long as we leave in a few days time, but we planned to do that anyway, so I don't see what the big deal is.«

He sputtered, seeming to choke on his own words. »Well, first of all, I would have appreciated if you had told me that you basically lived in Night Vale! Secondly–what do you mean 'as long as we leave in a few days time'? I'm feeling slightly threatened here!«

I heaved another sigh. »No one is threatening you. Well, no one is threatening you in particular. It's just that this place does weird things to outsiders if they only stay here long enough–I mean, you've met Mom, so you should know what I'm talking about.«

He looked at the open door my mother had left through a few moments ago, then back to me and repeated that a couple of times frantically. Stepping closer to me, he lowered his voice to a whisper. »You mean- when 'outsiders',« he gestured quotation marks into the air. »Stay here long enough, they become... like her? This place gives you dementia?«

Why did he always have the need to find words for everything? »You could certainly say so, even though that's not really it. But for the sake of simpleness–yes. It basically gives you dementia. The people who were born here are pretty much immune to it, though.«

Alex breathed in and out a few times, presumably to gather his wits. »What do you mean, 'pretty'?«

For fucks sake, could he just stop picking all the relevant words out of my sentences?

»Some people are a little easier to influence than other people. No big deal there, though. It only happens like once every generation. I think.«

He stared at me thoughtfully, as if considering my words; and probably figuring out which snippet he would pick out next to make me explain some more.

I glanced out the window again, noticing it was about time we got out of the living-room.

»C'mon, we need to get out,« I said, obviously interrupting his inner monologue. He narrowed his eyes at me, but stepped out into the hall nonetheless. I followed and closed the door firmly behind me.

»Why exactly do we need to leave the room now?« he asked nonchalantly. Ah, Alex. You think you are starting to figure things out, don't you? Keep trying, buddy.

»It's the things living in the woods. You don't want to mess with them–even though things have been considerably calmer since Arden left, we still don't want to take a chance with those fuckers.«

And there he went again, looking extremely uncomfortable. »And what are 'those fuckers'?« He really liked his quotation marks, didn't he.

»Who knows,« I answered with a shrug of my shoulders. The only thing we knew about them was that they came out at night and ate pretty much everything consisting of flesh. Except grandma and Arden, of course.

He frowned in obvious frustration. »Why do none of you people know what's going on around here? You fucking live here!«

His little outburst didn't really impress me, so I simply shrugged again. »Ah, you know. No one really cares.«

»What do you mean-« he began, but I stopped him right there.

»If you fucking say 'what do you mean' one more time, I'm gonna haul your ass out into the garden and leave you there with the Woodkeepers. Fucking watch me, mate.«

He looked slightly taken aback at that, but recovered quickly enough, his gaze sweeping me from head to toe.

»Is this why you are never impressed by any horror-movie we watch? Because you live in a horror-movie?«

Now, that was hilarious. I couldn't help myself, I started laughing. Alex was first surprised, then pleased with himself.

»Probably,« I answered, grinning.

Mom made dinner and Alex and I set the table. We didn't have anything to do anyways. Grandma was still out on the veranda, pinning shed snake-skins she had found somewhere to the side of the house.

Alex watched her with interest from the window and grandma ignored him. Mom was humming in the background, checking on her meatloaf in the oven. It was the kind of strange domesticity I had missed during my time away.

»You said since your brother had left, the... Woodkeepers, I think you called them, hadn't been as persistent. Why is that?« he asked quietly as I stepped up to him and leaned on the windowsill.

The old oil-lamp illuminating the veranda flickered, and grandma stopped what she was doing for a second to throw a stern look into the darkness beyond, making a shooing hand-motion. The flickering stopped and she continued undisturbed.

I let my head fall against the glass of the window. »Because Arden is... well, he's special. Not special like Gran, but still. Special.«

»If I were to ask how exactly he is special, you would say you don't know, right?«

»Yep.«

He heaved a tired sigh. »How can you live with this not-knowing? It would drive me crazy.«

I smiled and vaguely gestured in my mothers direction. He followed my hand, and his eyes widened comically in understanding.

»No,« he said with an unbelieving shake of his head.

»Yes,« I retorted. »And that's the only thing I know.«

Half an hour later, grandma had come back in and was staring at Alex. She had been at it for a few minutes now, and it had crossed the 'uncomfortable', the 'creepy' and now the 'really unsettling' mark.

Alex looked over at me, seeking help, but I couldn't do anything. Grandma would take her time, no matter what.

Finally, she swept her intense gaze over to me and leaned back in her chair.

»I hope you didn't bring him here to tell us you are marrying him,« she said, with an obvious edge to her voice. Alex managed to look both offended and relieved at once.

I snorted. »Of course not. We are friends, Gran. You know my standards.«

At that, he only looked offended.

»No offence, Alex,« I said.

»Full offence!« Grandma butted in. She stabbed a crooked finger in Alex' direction. »That one wouldn't even last two months here!«

»That may be,« I answered as I seated myself next to Alex and patted his shoulder encouragingly. »But we aren't here to stay and we're also not here to get married. Don't you worry, Gran.«

»Still,« she continued. »Imagine what your father would say if you were to marry that one. I would never hear the end of it!«

I chuckled lowly and Alex threw me a dark glare.

»I know. Where is the old man, anyway?«

»He went to visit your brother, dear,« My mother said from the kitchen-counter. »He should be back soon.«

Grandma shook her head. »That brother of yours, Arden, he is only making trouble these days. He keeps disturbing the Woodkeepers; they even went and took a chicken from Old Lady Miller! Can you believe it!«

I frowned and looked over at Mom for confirmation, but she kept her back to us. Alex looked as confused as I felt.

»How is he disturbing them? I thought he was off doing his own thing.«

»That is what keeps disturbing them! Arden doing whatever Arden is doing!«

I didn't answer. It seemed very improbable that Arden of all people could be railing up the Woodkeepers, but when grandma said he did, it must be true. And Pa probably wanted to stop him from whatever it was he was doing out there.

Before I could continue my hypothesizing, three gunshots in quick succession sounded outside, breaking the peace and making Alex jump in his seat.

»That's gotta be Pa,« I mumbled to myself and got up. The door swung open as I jogged down the corridor, revealing my father in all his glory. The shotgun with the three barrels was slung over his shoulder and he looked grumpy as usual.

He kicked the door shut behind him and threw the shotgun from him, toppling a big potted plant.

»It's always the same with those three,« he muttered under his breath and unclasped the breastplate he wore for obvious reasons, then ruffled my hair as he walked by.

»It's good you're here, Ryn. I need you to talk to your brother.

#you can tell a lot about my mental state back then by reading this #ray was really going through it #short story #unfinished #i really stopped writing this mid dialogue #very iconic of me #rayrambles

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maybeimamuppet · 3 years ago

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the blood of angry (wo)men

hey hey darling readers!! welcome back!! for a second, anyway!! this is a request fill for aspenchokey on wattpad, who requested leo and layla being with damian and one gets her period. so here it is. this also means you get to meet some more of my oc''s in the form of damian and aaron's kids. so, some basic information: they're a group of three biological siblings that they adopted. ivie is the oldest, shes 18 in this and was 13 when they were adopted, but shes just mentioned and not really in this. ellis is in the middle, hes 15 and was 10 when they were adopted. then milly (short for amelie) is the baby. shes 8 in this and was 3 when they were adopted.

tw for periods/menstruation. otherwise, please enjoy!!

“Girls!” Cady calls from the kitchen. Her twins both come barreling down the stairs to find her.

“Yeah, Mama?” Layla asks, panting slightly.

“Uncle D is going to watch you tonight, your mom and I have a-“ Cady replies.

“Date night, we know, Mama. It’s Saturday,” Leo finishes. Cady chuckles.

“We are pretty predictable, aren’t we?” She hums. “We’ll drop you off around five and be back to get you by eleven.”

“Ooh, late night,” Layla teases. Cady rolls her eyes.

“You know what we get up to,” she huffs. “Your boring old mothers.”

“Mom told us about the time she stole a sheep when you were in high school,” Leo pipes up. “What happened to that?”

“We happened,” Cady laughs. “She grew up and settled down.”

Janis comes in then, paintbrush behind her ear and carrying a mug. “Hey, gang. What are we talking about?”

“You,” Layla teases. “And how you’re old and boring now.”

“Ah,” Janis says with a knowing nod. She takes a drink of whatever’s in her mug. “Oh, that’s the paint water, what-ugh!”

“Jay,” Cady huffs around a laugh. “Maybe you haven’t settled down. Why do you never look at things before you drink them?”

“I like to live on the edge,” Janis responds, wiping her tongue off on a paper towel.

“We’re in our forties now, you should probably step back from that edge,” Cady giggles as she hands her some juice to rinse the taste from her mouth. “Goofy.”

Janis thankfully takes the offered beverage and chugs it, then wraps her wife in a hug. “Thank you.”

“Of course, my love,” Cady chuckles, turning around and pulling her wife in for a kiss. The twins both exclaim in disgust and run back upstairs. “You still taste like paint, go brush your teeth.”

“Okay,” Janis pouts.

————-

“Layla! Leo!” The twins’ cousin, Milly, yells as she runs to greet them.

“Let them breathe, Mills,” Damian chides gently as his nieces are squished in a tight hug by his youngest child. Milly moves onto her aunties, so Damian takes his turn to tackle the twins.

“Hey, Uncle D,” Leo says, sounding a little choked as she’s wrapped in a tight hug. It’s what they’ve come to expect after thirteen years of knowing him. Janis eventually pries him off her daughters for her turn, and Cady joins in.

Layla and Leo head into the living room as Milly drags them along. Aaron is there playing a video game with his son, Ellis.

“Ellie!” Layla yells teasingly, running to tackle her cousin. Ellis has roughly four seconds to scramble to put his controller down and get into a safe position before she lands on him with a dull thud.

“I hate you so much,” he grumbles. “Hey.”

“Whatcha playing?” Layla asks, yelping as Leo drags her off to allow her cousin some personal space.

“Fifa,” Ellis says once he’s got his hair back to its properly ruffled state.

“Ooh, can I play?” Layla asks. Aaron hands his controller over. “Hehe. I’m gonna kick your ass.”

“Hey!” Cady and Janis both call at the same time. Layla shrinks into herself.

“Sorry, moms,” she mumbles. Cady raises an eyebrow at Janis, who also shrinks into herself. They both know she’s the reason why their twins know every curse word in the dictionary. “Sorry El.”

“It’s fine,” Ellis chuckles. “I’ll kick your butt first.”

Layla snaps to attention and goes to work trying to beat her cousin. Aaron comes to join his husband and friends for a chat while Milly drags Leo to the backyard to do dances.

After a nice, but long, conversation, Cady and Janis kiss their twins goodbye and head out. Damian and Aaron are now left alone with four children. Oh boy.

————

Leo teaches Milly bits of her routines until sunset, at which point they’re called inside. Both of them are sweaty and frizzy-haired and immediately head to the kitchen to chug down water.

Leo plops down next to her sister and leans in, covering her twin in sweat. Layla shoves her away with a groan.

“Ew, Leo! Gross!”

“Like you don’t do it to me,” Leo retaliates. “What happened to kicking his butt?”

“I’ve never played this before!” Layla says.

“You played soccer for, like, five years, how is a video game of it that different?” Leo teases. Ellis tugs Leo down to the floor by an ankle to stop their bickering. She yelps and thumps to the ground beside him. “Ow!”

“You’re a gymnast, don’t you fall all the time?” Ellis teases.

“Yeah, on my face, usually,” Leo grumbles, rubbing her sore bum. She notices red on her hand when she shifts positions. Oh, hell.

————-

“Where did Leo run off to?” Aaron asks as he comes back into the room.

“I dunno, she just ran upstairs,” Ellis shrugs. “She was fine before, I don’t know what happened.”

“I’ll go check on her,” Layla says. “Here, Uncle Aaron.”

“Thanks, squirt,” Aaron says, taking the controller back from his niece and getting back into the game.

“Lolo? Where did you go?” Layla calls as she heads up the stairs to find her twin.

Nothing.

“Hey!” Layla yelps as a hand suddenly snatches her arm and hauls her into the bathroom. “Leo, what-“

“We have a situation,” Leo hisses.

“Okay, you couldn’t just tell me that? Where have you been?” Layla grumbles. “What do you want, dummy?”

“I’ve been in here,” Leo murmurs. “It… happened.”

“What?”

“It,” Leo says again, sharper. Layla’s eyes go wide.

“Ohhhh,” she says. “That’s… fine, you know? Mom and Mama told us about this, they said not to be embarrassed. It’s natural, Lolo.”

“Yeah, but there’s nothing to use. Our backpacks are at home and there’s nothing here,” Leo huffs. “I think Ivie took all her stuff with her to college. I don’t want to get blood all over the place.”

“Oh yeah,” Layla agrees. “Should I go ask Uncle D to buy some?”

“No!”

“Why not? You need something,” Layla huffs. “Or are you just gonna hide in here until Mom and Mama come get us?”

“I don’t want him to know,” Leo grumbles. “It’s… it’s embarrassing.”

“You’re literally doing the opposite of what Mom and Mama said to do,” Layla says. “Uncle D, like, changed our diapers and stuff. He has two daughters, and one of them definitely already has her period. He’s not gonna care or judge you for needing stuff.”

“Yeah, I know, but-“ Leo begins, getting cut off by a knock on the door.

“Ladies, is everything good? You’ve been in there a while,” Damian asks through the door. “We’re gonna watch a movie soon.”

The twins frantically gesture to one another, having a conversation without words. Layla wants to tell him, Leo doesn’t. Layla wins.

She checks to make sure everything important is covered to protect her twin’s privacy and then opens the door. Damian pokes his head in with his eyes closed.

“What’s up?” He asks.

“Japan is invading,” Leo grumbles.

“What?”

“Satan’s sacrificial waterfall,” Leo tries again.

“Oh,” Damian says. “Oh my gosh! Aww, honey! You guys are growing up quick, holy shit.”

“Why did you get that one?” Layla asks.“That’s what your mom called it when we were in high school,” Damian explains. “And college. Living together was rough those weeks.”

The twins both giggle a bit, imagining their mom clinging to Damian and whining at him. It’s nothing they haven’t seen before, but imagining them younger is fun.

“Oh, we don’t have anything here, do we?” Damian suddenly realizes. “Shit. Which one of you is it? Both?”

“Just her,” Layla teases. “But yeah, she needs stuff.”

Damian thwacks her on the head gently. “It’s gonna happen to you, soon, be nice. Leo, honey, why don’t you take a shower? I’m gonna take your darling twin to go buy you some stuff you’ll need.”

“Did I get blood anywhere?” Leo asks anxiously as Damian hands her a few soft towels.

“I didn’t see any,” Damian shrugs. “If you did it’s not a big deal, after being married to your uncle for twelve years I know how to get stains out of everything. Speaking of, give Layla anything that got stained, we’ll wash that for you.”

“Okay,” Leo murmurs. “Thanks, Uncle D.”

“Of course, honey. You relax, everything’s good,” Damian comforts, hauling Layla back out of the bathroom and shutting the door. “Darling?”

Aaron pops his head out from the kitchen and looks at them as they walk downstairs. “Yeah, babe?”

“I’m taking Layla out for a while, do you have dinner plans yet?” Damian asks.

“No, why?” Aaron asks as Damian follows him back to the kitchen. He spies the slightly stained shorts in Layla’s hands. “Ah. Got it.”

Layla looks between them in confusion. “What?”

“We’re having spaghetti and meatballs tonight,” Aaron says.

“Okay, how did you-what did-“ Layla stutters.

“Both your moms always crave carbs and red meat when they’re on their periods, it’ll probably be the same for you two. You learn stuff quick when you live with two ladies,” Damian shrugs.

“Daddy, can I come?” Milly asks. “Please? I’m done with chores.”

“Of course, Froggy,” Damian says, grinning as his daughter squeals and runs off to find some shoes. “El, do you want to come?”

“Where are you going?” Ellis asks.“Just the convenience store, probably,” Damian says. Ellis shakes his head and goes back to his video game. “Alrighty. Let’s go!”

————-

“Layla, do you know what brand your moms bought you guys?” Damian asks once they’re in the right aisle.

“No,” Layla says. “Does it really matter? They all look the same.”

“I guess it doesn’t matter all that much,” Damian shrugs. “But they are different sizes, so we’ll have to read them first.”

“These ones are pretty,” Milly says, pointing to a box.

“Those are tampons, honey, we need pads,” Damian says. “Your moms should do tampons with you, that’s not… my area of expertise.”

“What’s a tampon?” Milly asks.

“Um… it’s kind of like a pad, but it goes inside,” Damian says. Milly pulls a face and runs away from the box. “You have a few years left, kiddo. You have time to learn.”

“It’s gonna happen to me too?” Milly huffs.“Yep. Every month until you’re about fifty,” Damian responds with a ruffle to her hair.

“What the hell?!” Milly yells. “That’s not fair! Daddy, can’t I just be a boy like you?”

Damian and Layla both bite their lips to hold back a laugh at Milly’s reaction. Damian doesn’t even scold her for swearing.

“Do you actually want to be a boy or do you just not want a period?” Layla asks helpfully. “You don’t have to be a boy to not get one. My mom takes medicine to stop hers because it bugs her so much.”

“Oh,” Milly says. “I’ll do that. I like being a girl.”

Layla hugs her from behind and continues browsing. “This kind look familiar, I think this is what Mama got us.”

Damian grabs grabs the box and reads over it. “Sounds good to me.” He tosses it into their basket along with the nighttime variety in case someone gets their period during a sleepover. “Okay, this way.”

“Candy?” Layla asks in confusion when she sees what aisle they’ve been led to. “Why?”

“You have so much to learn, young one,” Damian tuts. He grabs a massive bag of chocolate and adds it to their basket too. Layla tries to peek at what kinds are inside and earns herself a gentle flick. “Not for you.”

“That’s all for Leo?!” Layla asks loudly. “No fair!”

“Do you currently have a torrent of blood escaping your body against your will?” Damian asks with a raised eyebrow. Layla shakes her head. “That’s what I thought. You’ll get your own bag when you get yours. I’ll fight off your moms to give you your first period chocolate. Just a few more things, then we can go back home.”

Damian grabs some spare undies and a lavender teddy, one that can be microwaved and used as a heating pad. Once that’s been added to the basket he lets each of the girls pick a face mask for themselves, and ones for him, Aaron, Leo, and Ellis too.

“Ooh, look!” Milly suddenly says, wandering off when she spies some miniature backpacks. “Daddy, can I get one?”

“Actually, yeah,” Damian says. “Layla, that’d be good for when you two don’t have your school backpacks, you could keep your stuff in there. You should pick one too.”

“Okay,” Layla shrugs, grabbing a purple one without much thought.

“This one can be for Leo!” Milly says happily, holding a blue one with her own pink one.

“Sounds good, Froggy,” Damian hums. “Okay, let’s go check out now.”

Once their few items have been purchased, Milly takes the receipt that’s nearly as long as she is and does a ribbon dance around the parking lot. Layla cheers her on and acts as a backup dancer until they make it back to the car.

“Crazies,” Damian says lovingly as they enter the car. “Buckle up, I need to go home and eat.”

—————

They hear the shower water shut off just as they get back. Damian sends Layla upstairs with the new undies and pads to give to Leo. Her twin opens the door to take them and then quickly shuts it again, locking it behind her. Layla is halfway back downstairs before she hears Leo call for her.

With an eye roll she turns back around. “What now?”

“I don’t have clothes,” Leo mumbles. “Mine are in the laundry.”

“Oh,” Layla says. She takes a deep breath and yells, “Uncle D!”

“What?” Damian yells back.

“Leo needs clothes!”

“Oh! Okay, one sec!” Damian calls.

“God, Layla, you’re so loud,” Leo grumbles through the door.

“It worked, I don’t see why you’re complaining,” Layla huffs back.

Damian pads his way up the stairs. “You guys can’t share with Milly anymore, can you? That growth spurt you two had. Hmm.”

He disappears to his own bedroom and comes back with some of his old sweatpants and a hoodie.

“These will have to do, Aaron’s old stuff is all in the laundry,” he says, handing them to Layla to give to her twin. “Leo, dinner’s done whenever you’re ready, honey.”

“Thanks, Uncle D,” Leo calls through the door.

“Of course,” Damian says as he heads back to everyone downstairs.

“Do you need anything else, Your Highness?” Layla grumbles.

“No, leave me alone,” Leo says back.

“Suit yourself. Love you,” Layla calls as she also heads back downstairs.

“Love you too!”

————-

Leo comes padding gently down the stairs a few minutes later. Her wet hair is loosely braided over her shoulder and she’s in her uncle’s sweats, the pants tied with a hair tie at her waist and cuffed to fit, and the sleeves of the shirt rolled up several times.

Layla watches in a mix of awe and concern as her small dancer of a twin sister wolfs down three portions of their spaghetti dinner in the same time it takes her to finish one. Leo sticks her tongue out at her when she catches her staring.

“Whoa,” Leo says when she spies the massive bag of candy and teddy bear waiting for her on the couch after dinner. “This is all for me?”

“Of course,” Damian says. “Celebrate your next forty-odd years of misery, come on.”

“Leo, look,” Milly insists, dragging her to see the teddy bear. “He smells nice and you can cook him so he gets warm!”

“Thanks, Mills,” Leo chuckles. “Did you name it yet?”

“No,” Milly murmurs. “Um… Theo!”

“I like it,” Leo nods.

“Oh, wait!” Milly yells suddenly, running to grab the backpacks they bought.

“Milly, inside voice, darling,” Aaron scolds gently. There’s not much use to it, Milly is so exuberant all the time.

“Sorry Papa,” Milly says shyly. “Here!”

Leo takes it curiously. “Thank you.”

“For when we don’t have our school bags,” Layla explains. “Mine’s purple, don’t touch it.”

Leo rolls her eyes. “Sure, like I want your stuff. Hey, that’s mine!”

Layla quickly stuffs the rest of her stolen piece of chocolate into her mouth so Leo can’t have it back. “Heh.”

“Loser,” Leo huffs.

“Settle down,” Damian chuckles, grabbing his daughter and sitting on the couch for a movie while Milly passes out the face masks. Ellis cuddles into his side, and Aaron sits by him. Leo and Layla take their usual place on the ground by everyone’s feet. Leo holds her new warm teddy bear to her cramping tummy and forces her twin to cuddle her.

————-

“Heyyy,” Cady greets as they enter the house a few hours later. Milly runs to go hug her aunties.

“Hey, Milly Billy!” Janis greets, scooping her niece up and carrying her back to the living room. “Aww.”

Her twins are both sound asleep on the floor and almost completely intertwined. She can’t totally tell where one ends and the other begins.

“Why is Leo in Damian’s clothes?” Cady asks, taking a few pictures of her daughters actually tolerating each other.

“And why is there so much chocolate?” Janis adds, setting Milly down to go back to her own family.

“Leo started her period, her stuff got stained,” Damian explains. Aaron heads to go grab said clothes from the dryer. “So we took a fun little trip to the convenience store.”

“Poor kid,” Janis hums. “I didn’t even think of that, we gave them stuff to keep in their school bags but I forgot to give them anything for when they’re… not at school.”

“She was fine, she actually handled everything pretty well,” Damian shrugs. “Did you ladies have fun?”

Cady starts giggling suddenly, and Janis pouts. “I only hit the ceiling one time!”

“Jay, we went bowling,” Cady giggles. “I still don’t know how you managed it, that ball was heavy.”

“It was one time! I beat you, anyway,” Janis grumbles.

“I let you win,” Cady retaliates. “Get our children.”

Janis carefully pries the twins apart and scoops up Layla while Cady takes all of their things. Cady carefully pecks her daughter on the forehead as Janis carries her past and giggles quietly as her nose twitches.

Janis comes back once Layla is safely in the car and grabs Leo to carry her out as well. Leo is a lighter sleeper and wakes up as she’s lifted from the ground.

“Hey, Mommy,” she yawns. Janis chuckles and kisses her forehead.

“Hey, Bee. I hear you had a big day,” she whispers back. Leo nods and cuddles into her. Cady kisses her forehead too, and her daughter grins a little. “Bye guys. Thank you for taking care of her.”

Aaron and Damian both wave as the ladies all leave. Janis puts Leo in the back by her sister and gets into her own seat to take her family home. Leo falls back asleep almost immediately, so Cady and Janis are almost alone together.

Cady looks at her when she hears a sniffle. “Mpendwa, what’s wrong?”

“They’re growing up,” Janis whispers. “Leo has her period, she’s-she’s a teenager. They both are, they’re not… they’re not my little ones anymore.”

Cady grins sadly at her and squeezes her hand. “I know. We can’t stop time. But they’ll always be our babies.”

Janis nods and squeezes her back, blinking the tears out of her eyes so she can drive safely.

—-

Janis carries the twins up to bed once they get home. When she heads back to her own bedroom, she finds her wife waiting for her with an old photo album from the twins’ first few years.

Janis rushes through changing into her pajamas and brushing her teeth to cuddle in with her wife. She and Cady stay up late, reminiscing over the photos and even farther back.

“Did you ever think when you rescued me from the bathroom that day in high school that we’d be here?” Cady asks quietly once photos have been seen and stories retold.

“I could only dream it, Sunshine,” Janis murmurs back. Cady scoffs and nudges her.

“You’re so poetic,” she chuckles. Janis rests the photo album on her nightstand and grabs her wife for their nightly cuddle session. Once the lights are off and they’re holding each other close, Cady whispers, “I’m glad we’re here.”

“I am too, baby,” Janis whispers back in between kisses. “I am too.” -

thank you for reading!! hope you enjoyed!

lots of love,

ezzy

#cadnis #paint by numbers #space safari #cady heron x janis sarkisian #cady x janis #cady heron #mean girls the musical #damian hubbard #aaron samuels #mean girls broadway #mean girls musical

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violetnotez · 5 years ago

Text

Shopping Trip HC- Kirishima x Reader

@fxndxmxnxce!:Hi! i just saw your blog but you already look so good😍 could i get a request where kirishima and his s/o go out to get groceries for cook dinner for their classmates? they goof off; riding around in carts, taking random samples of food, and even recite vines while they look for ingredients🥺 just a lot of tooth rotting fluff because why not :D bonus todoroki gives them endeavor’s card (in which he stole) to let them pay for the stuff tonight LMAOO thanks i love you🥰🥰🥰

ACK MY FIRST REQUEST THANK UUU! I love getting requests ngl :) I made this into a HC hope you dont mind!

Kirishima x reader

Genre: OVER LOAD of Fluff

Word Count:

Warnings: Choatic Energy throughout

(RULES | MASTERLIST COMING SOON| REQUESTS OPEN!!! :))

----------------------------

It was the week before exams and everyone was beginning to cram big time

Everyone was in the common room, every surface covered in textbooks and notes from the semester

Izuku, Ochaco, Iida, Froppy, Ojiro, and Toru were on the training grounds practicing for the practical exams- Todoroki was studying on the couch

Momo was giving all of Bakusquad (including you) a huge study session that made all of your heads hurt (minus Bakugo- he wouldnt be caught dead studying with a bunch of ‘idiots’)

All of you were exhausted- you had been going at this since 9 in the morning at it was already close to dinner time

Kirishima had his head resting in your lap, you playing with his fire red hair as Momo rambled about Geometry, while Kaminari and Sero tried desperately to take notes as fast as Momo talked

Mina had given up an hour ago and was now standing in front of the fridge

“Ughhhhh”, she whined, “we have no fooooooood.”

“Cmon Mina we got like a hour to dinner you can wait!” Kaminari said while writing like his life depended on it (which it kinda did- he was borderline passing his classes as it was- if he failed these exams he was screwed)

“Oh be quiet Kaminari your the one who eats all the food half the time!” Mina yelled frustrated

When Mina’s hangry- she is HANGRY

“Dont blame this on me- my quirk isnt the one that depends on eating to work!”

“If your trying to imply Im the one who ate all the food then you are completely wrong!” Momo spat out at Kaminari, kinda looking hurt

“Can you all keep it down-Im trying to read,” Todoroki interjected calmly, not even looking up from his book

To be honest, all of you forgot Todorki was even in the room, so it kind of threw you all off

“Hey-why dont me and y/n just go pick up some food! The market’s not too far away” Kirishima sat up, his hair in odd angles from you combing it with your fingers

You knew what he was doing- he had zoned out too, and he just wanted a way to leave the study session, but he was too polite to actually leave it (for Momo’s sake- she got way too excited over study sessions)

You yawned, stretching from sitting for so long- “thatd be nice, Id like to stretch my legs a little.”

Kaminari shrugged, “Sure why not- not like were going anywhere, mind as well get some snacks-”

You started making a list of everything everybody wanted and it was long- Kaminari and Sero were shouting out everything fattening, from Takis to Twinkies to 2 liter sodas, Mina yelled she wanted a bunch of sweets like Pocky, Momo was a little healthier but she wanted more expensive things like sushi, and Kirishima wasnt helping since he wanted to buy everything for everybody

You two started adding up stuff in your head and you knew for sure there was no way you could pay for all this, even if everyone chipped in

You gave Kirishima a look, letting him know that this wasn't going to work- somebody had to help you two out or ask for a little less

He knew you hated to let your friends down, so he smiled, letting you know he had it under control

“Uh, guys, we cant get so much food- this is way too much and we cant buy all this- can we maybe take something off the list?” kirishima asked as Kaminari and Mina began to whine

To your surprise, Todoroki walked over and handed you something. You looked down at it seeing it was a credit card.

You gasped slightly- “No Todoroki we cant take this this is yours-”

“I dont care what you do with it or how much you charge on it,” he said calmly, “as long as it makes you all quiet.”

“Of course- thanks man, we owe you one!” Kirishima smiled, grabbing your hand, pulling you up and shuffling you out the door

“Well you were desperate to leave, huh Kiri?” you kidded as you cuddled closer to him as you both walked to the store

“Anything to spend some alone time with you princess,” he smiled, kissing the top of your head, “Also.... I think my head was starting to hurt from listening to Momo- what even is a Pythagorean theoreom?!”

Oh Kiri you poor baby

You both get to the supermarket and the cute lovey dovey Kirishima disappears

He instantly gets super excited because FOOD

And carts

“Cmon y/n they have kiddie carts!”

“Kirishima no those are for kids!” you laugh, taking the cart from him gently

“Ahhh cmon babe please!!!”

You kiss him on the cheeck- “No Kiri sorry!” (he pouts tho)

You get one of the normal carts and he instantly stands on the back and holds on to the wired basket, forcing you to push him around

You shake your head, smiling, because he looks so cute just standing there having the time of his life as you push him around

“A Thousand Miles” comes over the speakers and you both look at each other with the most shocked but happy faces ever

-30 seconds later-

Your now on the back, Kirishima is pushing your around like a maniac, has knocked you into 3 stands of food already, but you dont care because your both laughing trying to sing the lyrics

“IF I COULD FALL INTO THE SKY” Kirishima practically shouts, holding a can of whip cream like a microphone

“DO YOU THINK TIME COULD PASS ME BY!” you sing after

“BECAUSE I WOULD WALK A THOUSAND MILES JUST TO SEE YOU!” you both shout out, getting some dirty looks from a pair of old ladies at the meat section (which you could care less about)

You both look at each other and just start busting up, Kirishima taking you to the next aisle

You get to the candy section, where Kirishima is still laughing over the old ladies’ glares at you two

You kinda calmed down, going back to the task at hand, picking out all the candies Mina had asked you to get her

He then sees a bag of Life Savers

PLS TELL ME SOMEBODY REMEBERS THIS VINE

“Hey y/n-” he taps your shoulder, giggles barely being contained from him

You turn around, a grinning Kiri holding a bag of Life Savers

“Le-fes Sa-ve-airs”

You roll your eyes, giggling, “Oh my gosh Please Kiri no more vines!”

“Oh calm on vines are so awesome!” he exclaims, putting the bag of candy back in its original space

“Yes but I think we’ve annoyed enough people with our vine references”

“Only two old ladies!”

“Two old ladies that will probably get us kicked out” you laughed, giving him a kiss

“Lets just get the food so we can go back to the dorms- Im getting kind of hungry seeing all this food…”

“Wait, youre hungry?!?” he asks super concerned

“Just a little,” you shrug off, “its no big deal-”

“WAIT HERE” Kirishima practically yells, seemingly not hearing what you said and runs off

You shake your head, knowing your boyfriend too well- he could get impulsive sometimes

You got all the food and was waiting in the checkout line when you spotted Kirishima trying to balance a bunch of small, clear cups in his hands

“Are those--- samples?!” you asked, shocked that he went around the WHOLE store getting all those samples

“Yep!” he says super proud, happy he was helping his girlfriend

“Oh my gosh Kiri I love you, you know that, right?” you exclaim happily, your stomach growling as you began to eat out of one of the cups

KIRISHIMA.exe is BrOkEn

If he knew food would get you so happy he would have brought you WAY more food A LOOOOOOONG time ago

You got to the check out and the price- was- ALOT

You gulped, hoping the rumors of Todoroki being extremely rich were true

And thank the gods they were because you were able to pay for the food no problem

Then you realized- you had 10 bags full of food you had to lug back to the dorms

And it was close to a 15 minute walk

You started picking up bags, already feeling the weight of them after 3

“I got them, don't worry babe!” Kirishima gingerly took the bags from your hands and began to strap them across his arm

‘Wait Kiri no theres alot you can't hold all-”

Kirishima put a kiss on your cheek, instantly making your cheeks warm

“Its okay I can carry them!” He smiled, making your insides all fuzzy

How did you get such a cute boyfriend?

“At least let me hold 2!”

You literally had to claw two bags away from him because he refused to let you hold any because it wasnt “manly” for his girlfriend to have to hold a bunch of heavy bags by herself

The walk back was a breeze, Kirishima seemingly unbothered by the weight and you two both enjoyed the sunset coming down against the mountains

When you finally got back, all your classmates were there, everyone in their pajamas and on the floor

All the notes and books had been replaced by pillows and blankets and everyone was in their lounge or sleep wear

“Oh hey ya two love birds, you got the food!” Kaminari yelled out happily, wearing pajamas with lightning bolts on them

“Hey Pikachu,” you laughed, “and yes, we got your food,” throwing him a bag of chips (which he devoured instantly like an animal)

“Why is everyone in their pajamas?” Kirishima asked, putting the bags on the kitchen counter

Mina came over and hugged you, so happy you got her snacks as Uraraka made a pillow float in the air

“We all decided were going to hang out and build a huge pillow fort and have a sleepover!” Uraraka exclaimed excitedly, Froppy and Momo helping her place the pillows inside the fort

“Awesome!” Kirishima shouted excitedly, “Cmon, y/n, lets go get changed!”

He grabbed your hand, Kaminari and Sero making whistle sounds at you two as Kirishima pulled you up stairs

You shook your head, a blush coming on your cheeks

“When did they get so interested in us?” you asked, your face turning red from those dumb whistles

“Dont worry about them babe,” Kirishima said soflty, “their just jealous that i have somebody as amazing as you.”

BONUS

“So,” Ochaco asked, snacking on a cookie, “how were able to pay for all this food?!”

“Yeah, you guys must have spent a fortune,” Tsuyu added

“It was Todoroki,” you explained, “he was nice enough to let us pay for it on his credit card- again Todoroki, thank you for letting us pay for all this!”

Kirishima agreed, his hand wrapped around your waist, “We totally owe you a favor- if you ever need anything, come to us!”

Todoroki nodded in thanks

“Your all welcome”, he replied calmly, “but that credit card wasnt mine-”

“It was my father’s.”

You instantly choke on the soda you were sipping on, Kirishima patting your back to keep you from choking

“Wait-” you gasped out, “We SPENT 500 DOLLARS OF FOOD ON ENDEAVOR’S-PERSONAL-CREDIT CARD?!”

“WHY WOULD EVEN GIVE US THAT CARD IF IT WASN'T EVEN YOURS MAN?!” Kirishima shouts, fear evident in his voice

To say the least, the night just got 10 times more stressful as you and Kirishima were terrified that the #1 Hero was going to come and rip you to shreds for using his money to buy snacks

Requests open!!!!

#bnha #bnha x reader #mha x reader #kirishima #kirishima x reader #mha kirishima x reader #mha kirishima #kirishima imagine #kirishima hc x #kirishima hc #bnha kirishima #bnha kirishima x y/n #kirishima fluff #bnha kirishima x you #bnha kirishima x reader #mha kirishima fluff #mha kirishima x you #mha kirishima hc #mha kirishima x y/n

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maximumninjavoid · 4 years ago

Text

Mining for Unobtanium part 21

Oh my gawd, yes, twenty one.

Ya’ll have been so good, you get TWO parts of this nonsense today. that’ll make your Monday suck less.....

I’m having a GREAT time writing this. I need to put it all into one BIG WORD DOC. an asbestos word doc.

Unbeta’d, we die like appliances . And cheap cars.

@fishcustardandclintbarton, that’s their line. I stole it.

At eleven packages arrived. One was from a lingerie shop I had browsed at online, Bordelle. Their stuff was exquisite, really, cutting edge fashion, and wickedly sexy. I assumed he either knew or guessed my sizes. I had already done my due diligence on the dreadmill, hoping some of this whatever this was would dissipate, but even an hour at an incline of three and a half didn't settle the starlings in my stomach. Those were no butterflies. I spent an indulgent amount of time in the bath, lotioned everything that could be with almond oil, touched up my cuticles, decided my pedicure was in good shape, exfoliating, buffing, it was madness. Nerves, I suppose. I mean, wouldn't you be? I began opening boxes. Stockings, of the most fine denier, that you could read a newspaper through, and a Cuban heel with a seam up the back. A suspender belt of black straps, almost like an open bottom girdle, with six garters. A matching balconette bra that would really display my decolletage. There didn't seem to be any panties. Hmmmmmm. There was a beautiful pair of shoes with a low heel and an ankle strap, which was amazing, because I don't have the grace or the talent to wear heels. The dress that accompanied it was simple and elegant, well made, and also rather retro in it's styling. Fitted bodice, sweetheart neckline, sleeves that ended just at the elbow, rather fit and flare in its styling, and the skirt was voluminous. My God, there was even a hat with a little veil and gloves. He didn't miss a trick. I began to dress. Fortunately two weeks in a hotel had not been all that bad for me. The circles under my eyes required minimal spackle, a bit of blush, a swipe of contour here and there, with my contacts in, eyeliner was out of the question and it hadn't occurred to me that I should pack lashes. Mascara it is then. Lip stain, blotted, fixed,reapplied, blotted again, this was NOT coming off, on my mask or on a shisuitAollar. I spritzed some scent in all the proper places and I hoped he wouldn't recognize it, and that it would please. I've never been one for traditional women's fragrance. It smells artificial on me. I like darker notes, spice, leather,and they're much better balanced in men's fragrances. I get lots of compliments, and never find myself wearing the same scent as anyone else. Seams straight. Pearls. Hat. Bag. Gloves. Aaaaaand it's 6:45. I've got fifteen minutes to make macrame out of my internal organs. And now, for entertainment, our brain will show a selection of every possible disaster scenario it can conjure, no matter how ridiculous. And I pace. I look at the clock again, and I swear it's moved backwards and now says 6:40. That cannot be correct. I shake my head. I pace some more. I pop breath mints like they're drugs I did in the eighties. I am not going to smoke. I might pass out. There's a knock on the door. My heart pounds. I walk to the door and try to breathe....{internal voice; don't lose your shit} I open the door and there he is. In a suit. Not just any suit. I mean, you can't. Not when you're built like a brick...... House ( apologies to the Commodores). I could write epic poems that would put the Iliad to shame just describing his fair countenance....but I would be doing him a disservice if I didn't spent some time on just how much style he possesses. Tailoring is one thing. Fit, proportion, but he has raised style to high art. Like old Hollywood meets English Nobility, and unless I miss my guess, that's a bespoke Huntsman suit. Made specifically for him. To his precise measurements, by HIS cutter, who has a file on him, and all their other clients; about their preferences, in colors, fabrics, linings, how they want their trousers, best preferences, THE WHOLE NINE YARDS. Did you see *The Kingsmen*? That place. It's actually Huntsman. I think they have been on Saville Row for over 100 years. Might even have a Royal charter. The suit is perfection. Fits literally like it was made for him..... Because it was. And it took twelve weeks and multiple fittings. Charcoal grey, with a hint of a chalk stripe, very subtle, crisp white shirt, double breasted vest, with a watch chain no less, and the trousers are perfectly tailored, break at the perfect spot, and his tie is a perfect four in hand, and the tie is splashy, but flawless. Me? Oh I'm taking this all in, trying to remember to breathe, and he takes my hand, bows a little, brings it to his lips and just as his mouth is almost at my hand he turns my wrist and kisses the bare skin above my glove, and looks up at me with that smirk he has. "Ma'am? Shall we?" I put my finger under his chin and raise him to his full height . " A moment, please. " I step toward him and slide my hands up each side of his chest and lean in toward him. "Before we leave I wanted to thank you for your excellent taste. Your gifts were lovely and I hope I do them justice" and I pressed my lips to his. He pulled me in closer and wrapped his arms around me, his tongue sought to part my lips and I allowed it, my hand reaching up for the side of his face, as our tongues explored each other's mouth, tentatively at first, quickly catching fire. I didn't want to stop. But I knew if I didn't, we'd be rutting in this doorway and whatever he had planned would be for nothing. Difficult as it was, I pulled back and smiled. " I could do this all night, happily. And more, or did you want to keep our original plan? " He adjusted himself ( I don't think he knows I saw that ) and took my arm in his. "Do you have everything?" " Thank you, yes. I have my key, my bag, I am in your hands" . He closed the door behind us and walked me down the hall. We exited the hotel through a side door and got into a car with tinted windows. " Please tell me I'm not wearing your lipstick" Smiling again, I remarked that he wasn't but if he wanted to... And he laughed and pulled me in for another kiss. We made out. Like teenagers. In the back of this heavily tinted car, and I couldn't get enough of his kisses. We drove for a bit, I'm not certain how long, I frankly was too caught up in kissing him, and occasionally pulling back to look into those eyes. We could have driven off the cliffs of Dover, I'd never have known. We turned down a side street, then an alley and stopped in the back of a building. He got out of the car and said he'd be around to get me. Ok. I'll behave. He opened my door, offered me his hand to help me out, said something to the driver and then took my arm and we walked the few steps to the door in the back of this building. Henry was grinning like the cat that are the canary, and I couldn't figure out why. He knocked on the door and after a minute or two, it opened, and we went down a short hallway into a kitchen where there was a booth, IN. THE. KITCHEN. It was all I could do to not scream and go completely fan girl, for at that moment I realized where we were. This was the imagination station; the chef's table at Gordon Ramsay 's restaurant on Royal Hospital Road. I turned to my dinner date and threw my arms around his neck, peppering his face with kisses. " How did you know? How did you manage this? You realize that this might just kill me....oh, right, we have a provision for that. " He bowed from the waist " My Lady is pleased? "

" Oh darling, pleased is not the word! " Dinner was spectacular. Course after course of the most delicious ingenious things the chefs could create, with pristine service and just the two of us. Sharing bites, oh you must taste this, ooh! This, taste! Stealing kisses in between courses, and such easy conversation. we talked about books, and we talked about music, and he ribbed me about my ‘frozen in amber’ musical taste and I told him I had checked out some of the bands on his running playlist and liked quite a few of them. we sat close to one another, thighs touching, holding hands between courses, I kept getting lost in those eyes, but I did manage to hold up my end of the conversation.

I asked him if he was disappointed about not drinking during dinner and he countered with “ I haven’t seen you smoke”. We agreed that kissing was worth some sacrifices. Truth be told I did want a cigarette, but not as much as I wanted him. Dessert, coffee, more conversation, and I asked what else he had up his sleeve. He smiled. “ There is that american expression about the gun show?” I threw back my head and practically roared. “ I have this well in hand. Shall we?” And he took my hand and we got up and walked out the same back way we had come in, to the waiting car.

#henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill smut #henry cavill x reader

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judehayward · 4 years ago

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lady gaga voice slowly fadin in: ju-Das juda-ah-ah… this depressed goblin bastard is honestly my fav male muse like i dnt typically stick w male muses tht long i struggle bt................. i’ve played him the longest of them all n always seem to return to him. jst cnt stay away. way 2 attached to this absurd little man. it’s nai btw!!!! (josefine on the main). launches right in to jude’s intro without further adieu..... (u can also find his playlist here) 🧙‍🎨

「douglas booth & cis-male」⇾ hayward , jude, the senior radcliffe student’s records show that he is a pisces and 23 years old. he is studying ART, living in moris and can be protective, laidback, nonsensical & apathetic. when i see him i am reminded of wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects, lead marbles instead of eyes. ⇽「nai & 23 & gmt & she/her.」

he pinterest:

me in the voice of a card magician performing on the street: round up round up pick a pinterest any pinterest!

ta-da it’s aesthetics:

lead marbles instead of eyes, a stolen hearse careening down the wrong lane, wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, bags under the eyes that are so big they could pack enough clothes for a three week vacation, a cigarette wobbling from your bottom lip as you squint against the sunlight, passing out on a stranger’s rooftop, placing sunglasses over the eyes of a biology lab skeleton, gangling around the place like shaggy minus his scooby snacks, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects

about tha Bitch:

born in sheffield in england, bt they went back and forth between there n san fran a lot

jude was an unhappy accident. his parents never rly used protection bc they were super Liberal n Au Naturel n believed in the pull out method bc… they were maniacs. bt then the ONE time they used a condom in an effort to b safety conscious it broke n hence…. jude was born

they just kind of ran w it bc they had such a passionate relationship tht they were like What The Hell…. may as well! itll be fine we’ll learn to be good parents n love him like normal ppl do

spoiler alert: tht didn’t work out

they were ok to him like they weren’t fully Bad bt they just found him to be a massive burden n hindrance to their plans. pretty absent n irresponsible. they literally….. had sex all day every day n acted like a pair of teenagers. it ws a super weird environment for a kid to grow up in bc he literally had no role models or… guidance or…. anything rly. occasionally they’d joke around w him or pretend they properly knew what grade he was going into but for the most part they just Didn’t Care the way parents shd. they lost his birth certificate n dnt remember what they put as his middle name so he’s jst kind of like hmmmm............. n gives himself a diff one every time ppl ask. past variations hv included: jude pauly hayward, jude maureen hayward, jude van winkle hayward. says all of these w a very straight face

despite this he does hv some nice memories w them. usually he definitely sees them fr holidays. frm being rly young their christmas tradition hs been to get a bunch of chinese food like a Banquet Feast n spend all day smoking n drinking into the early hours. perhaps not the healthiest or most responsible bt 😔 jude rly likes it it’s kind of the one time of yr he feels he has a proper family

they r both suuuuper into the arts. rly good sculptors bt they paint too n they actually own a successful gallery in sheffield n san fran

(trauma tw) as a result he grew up around a lot of creative n sometimes pretentious ppl. the friends of his parents were more present in his life than his ACTUAL parents bc they were always jetting off to diff countries to scout out new pieces fr their galleries n just have a gd time in beautiful places without…. the annoyance tht ws being responsible n looking after someone. tbh some of his parents friends were rly damaging too bt….i won’t go into that just yet. it doesn’t rly…need properly explaining bc jude never talks abt it anyway n it….is rather triggering so i’ll jst….leav it for now tbh. basically they just were Not Nice n jude had a lot of bad memories he keeps repressed bt he also??? has some gd ones..... it was a strange environment bt he’s a survivor

(death n grief tw) he hd to do community service bc he kind of… hd a bit of a breakdown before the funeral of his elderly neighbour who bsically raised him bc her kids rly didnt care abt her they jst wanted her inheritance?? so he… stole the hearse w her casket still in it n ws jst like… drivin around the place sort of… tryin nt to cry…..KJJFHSFKJGHKFG i mean. it isnt funny its actually sad bt :/ in a very bizarre n jude way. he gt caught n taken in fr questioning bt her son kind of realised hw… broken up abt her death jude ws n had a heart n didnt press charges. regardless he stil hd to do community service bc it ws like taken seriously even tho it ws his first proper offence. doin it rly exhausted n depressed him so when he wsnt doin tht he ws just hibernatin in his room……. this ws like 4 months ago nw............ just some fun lore fr u all

bc of how he ws raised he has a p cultured taste. he luvs classic lit n p much anything artsy. he can play piano 2 n sometimes gets rly high n thinks he’s mozart level gd at composing he’s jst going fking wild on the keys in a trance...... i mean he’s gd bt… chill

he’s rly sarcastic n so deadpan like he’ll say smthn completely ridiculous bt he’ll say it w his whole chest so sincere.... it’s rly hard to tell when he’s joking or serious honestly. has an overflowing secret sketchbook n if he cares abt someone he’ll probably secretly draw them. does NOT share these drawings w the person he hates being openly sentimental. at heart he is jst a very Sad Boy w lots of repressed issues like depression genuinely just does NAT giv him a single break bt he plasters over this w wise cracks n never discusses his emotions ever. he’s actually p decent or at least tries to b. he’s kind of like tht bit in superbad where michael cera gets rly drunk n makes a toast to women like tht energy...........

he has rly bad insomnia so he like never sleeps idk how he’s Alive straight up. please go to bed sir............. he always has rly sleepy eyes n rubs them tiredly mid conversation. he smokes a lot of weed to try n compensate fr this n make him tired bt he still struggles a lot

ANYWAY that aside he’s at radcliffe doing art, focusing on fine art like painting is............... the thing he luvs most...... his style is kind of.......... taking normal things n painting w surreal colours.... he likes A LOT of colour in his paintings which is kind of a stark contrast to his personality bc his world’s so.... washed out n grey............ lovs art n philosophy n literature n photography n music....

ummMMMMmm honestly idk i’m blankin on what else to say. ull find him smoking weed reading an american classic or gnawing at his thumbnail n getting charcoal smudges on all his clothes. wandering the streets in plaid pj bottoms n dr martens eating frm a cereal box without care in the world. he’s p broody n scruffy n he’s mostly here fr a laidback time....... doesn’t rly like when ppl take themselves too seriously........ likes strange ppl thinks the world is mde richer by them n likes when ppl can jst bounce back jokes at him without being like erm. u dont make sense mate. bc frankly he can come up w some strange stuff sometimes.............. talking to him cn b like navigating a dark n bendy road without a flashlight.......

(drugs tw) once did shrooms n woke up naked in the woods curled up in a pile of leaves. to this day he recounts this as his werewolf transformation. hs no idea hw he ended up there n when ppl r like are u not. concerned jude. tht is so strange? he jst shrugs like.............. dunno....................... suppose i’m jst a werewolf upon occasion. so casual abt it. jst truly does Not care abt most things at all..... almost to the point tht it’s concerning (sometimes way past the point tht it’s concerning too :/)

this is the desc on an aesthetic i mde of his style once n sums it up well!! ‘additionally: too many pairs of trousers, a hideous amount of white t-shirts all somewhat stained with charcoal, a jumper so thinly knit it almost looks sheer, chipped teale nail varnish, a cream corduroy jacket with a cigarette hole singed onto the cuff, vintage wiry reading glasses he almost never wears, a freshly rolled cigarette behind his ear, a thrifted t-shirt with a warped bart simpson wearing a stethoscope with the caption ‘bard knwos cardiology’ and two crops hacked that way with kitchen scissors that he sometimes wears to paint.‘

EXPERT at rolling spliffs like jst. mkes them so precise n neat....... it’s his super power. his fav thing to smoke frm is banana flavour papers.................... linking 2 this he’s like. bad w emotions bt he does try..... once his friend (maggie) ws sad so he brought her a spliff wrapped in grape flavoured paper bc it’s her fav fruit n jst like. wordlessly gave it to her. it’s the thought tht counts.....

PLOTS!!!!!

plays bass in a band which cld b a fun connection to get together??? i picture the music being like surf rock type like........... mac demarco...... bt he also luvs elliott smith n glass animals n the cure n metronomy n neutral milk hotel n talking heads n radiohead n mazzy star n wolf alice...................... idk jst like.... within tht ballpark i suppose i imagine it being................

mayb ppl he shares classes w?????? i’d like someone tht does a similar course n they hang out tgether when it comes to trips fr the module to museums or exhibits or wtever................ they both stand in front of paintings analysing it rly wrong n saying stuff like hmmmmmmmmm....... i do declare i see a, uh..... large phallus protruding from the centre of this image...... moves something in me.......... n some elderly person looking at it besides them is like Ergh. sickened n disgraced. leaves w a brow severely furrowed

someone he smokes w on the moris rooftop late at night when he cnt sleep??? mayb they’re up n cnt sleep either fr whtever reason n it’s become an unspoken kind of ritual where they always clamber out n find each other there n jst wordlessly keep them company

jude is kind of like. protective almost to a fault sometimes........... mayb some guy he’s punched......................... if they hurt someone he cares abt........... typically it wld hv been a girl he ws kind of like. affected by his first relationship bc she had a bad home situation n ever since jst wnts..... to Protect it’s kind of like an automatic instinct ingrained in him nw 😔 all sounds very noble n well bt sometimes it cn b a bit of an escalation i wnt lie

perhaps a few hook-ups??? jude doesn’t tend to sleep w ppl he rly knows bc he just..... likes it to b an impersonal thing doesn’t like getting attached fr various reasons so mayb they only kno each other via this OR mayb he bent his rules a bit..... cld either work seamlessly or hv added drama if one side hs mre feelings or whtever

currently living in moris w 2 roommates bt i’d love some neighbours perhaps..... mayb someone tht lives directly nxt door to his room n is like ://// bc he plays music loud n weeds always drifting frm his window n mking their room smell if theirs is open too................. or mayb they get on..... mayb there’s a rly mean seagull tht lands on a branch n poos on pedestrians n they both commentate on it frm their windows like david attenborough...... they’re like he’s at it again. they’ve named him n everything

HONESTLY anything if u have an idea hmu i’d love 2 hear it.......... rubs my hands tgether in excitement to plot up a storm w u all

#ruhqintro #depression tw #death tw #grief tw #neglect tw #trauma tw #drugs tw

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baekkieberry · 5 years ago

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𝕦𝕟𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕪 𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐧!𝐚𝐮 𝐛𝐚𝐞𝐤𝐡𝐲𝐮𝐧

Genre: demon!AU, Fluff. (angst + smut in future chapters), Supernatural

Characters: Baekhyun, EXO (mostly beagle line + Kyungsoo)

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader

Summary: Baekhyun had been a demon and living in hell his whole life, hanging with his friends and having way to much fun, until one day he gets kicked out for going too far. He's forced to live in earth until he redeems himself, until he met you, and maybe he doesn’t want to go back anymore.

Warnings: none

Word Count: 3005

A/N: hii this is my first fic :) i got inspired by the headcanon made by @youxidol

hope i did a good job ;)

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masterlist: intro chap1

Byun Baekhyun was the most fun guy you´ll ever meet. He was playful and basically could change his attitude from being a 5 year old to a sexy a teasing boy. He loved the attention and making everyone laugh, playing jokes on everyone since he was small and his older brother told him to put vaseline on the door knob in the bathroom. His mom was really upset but somehow he got away with it.

Since that moment he loved practical jokes, and that's how he met his bestfriends Chanyeol, Sehun, Jongdae and Kyungsoo. Chanyeol was his first friend when he entered middle school, they were both so playful that they became inseparable quickly: staying at each other houses and when they both had 8 they got they’re demon powers together. Demon powers were something amazing that, as everyone in hell learnt, was giving at a certain time between the years of 0-10, and if you didn’t develop them you were bashed from hell and returned to earth as a new soul without the knowledge of hell. So Baekhyun and Chanyeol were really happy, and they took advantage of this as much as they could.

Practical jokes were always easy with powers, moving the chair of someone or purposely spilling someone’s drink on themselves was really fun, but they took it to another level. Maybe moving the backpack of the history teacher to the ceiling or the rooftop, putting bugs on the directors coffee, baby powder instead of sugar…. yeah it’s they’re fault that there’s a penalty for using powers at school. That’s also the reason why Chanyeol and Baekhyun knew every police station and police officer in hell. They did so many pranks and illegal stuff that they visited the station 5 times a week, but left saying that it was hell and that demons were meant to torment so that’s what they did. It was a weird system

They soon met Sehun when the school bully was stealing his money. Sehun was a shy boy but when you got to know him he was as playful as ChanBaek although he was a whiny baby. But he had nothing to compare to Chen, they met him through Sehun as he was his neighbor. They couldn't stand him at the beginning but he was so lovable and fun that the four of them were now a little clique.

Through the years their clique growed and became really popular at college, now being 9 friends that hanged out everyday and were now called EXO. Girls always wanted to be with the most fun but scary demons around, they had girlfriends from time to time but they didn’t find them too amusing so they breakup with them in just a few months.

But as fun as Baekhyun life was, he did get in a lot of trouble for the amount of jokes that he did. Sure Chanyeol and Sehun eventually went with him but didn’t get in such trouble like he did. He was known as the Bart Simpson of hell but with powers. It all started with his neighbours and then it went further and further until it got to prank the government and that’s when the downfall started.

He had messed with the actual true fallen angel Satan a few times before, and let’s be honest the guy didn’t loved it, he was always bitter and just busy with a ton of things so Baekhyun playing around wasn’t something he enjoyed but he could easily get rid of him by blocking his powers for a few days. But oh boy this only made Baekhyun more eager to mess with him. Until he got to far. He’s prank was childish but he did it anyways, he decided to get inside Satan’s house and hide in the bathroom until the angel went in and started peeing. Baekhyun decided to take a photo but forgot to silenced his phone so he was caught. And as a punishment he was sent to earth and got just a few of his powers so that he could survive. “You can come back when you do something to change our mind” “And you can come in my bed whenever you want” he said while winking at the secretary taking notes.

And within seconds, he was living in Canada, Vancouver and he was living in hell. People were so nice and oh did Satan outdid himself with this one. He lived in the most friendly neighbourhood and his neighbors were nerds or old lady’s that always asked him to help them with the laundry. Yep, he saw a lot of old lady underwear mostly everyday, and was forced to chit chat with the nerds while waiting for the elevator.

But probably the worst part about all of this was his neighbour Sabrina. She was an old lady that literally saw him everyday and obligated him into eating her food and doing her laundry twice a week. Baekhyun really hated her and especially when she called him ‘sweetcheeks’.

Even though he hated her and mostly everyone in earth he tried to keep a low profile and fit in with the rest of the canadians. He would wear normal clothes at day, but in the night he mostly went to frat parties at different universities and flirt with girls, hook up with them and when they were fast asleep, he made them disappear from his house. Sabrina quickly noticed the noise that they made while hooking up so one time he called Baekhyun into his house “Sweetcheeks, I am a very very old woman and I well it’s not nice to disturb me at night, could you tone it down?” she said. “Well they like screaming I’m sorry Sabrina” he said while smirking. “Don’t be dirty Sweetcheeks that’s not okay, you could make it up to me by doing my laundry right now, the basket is there” Baekhyun rolled his eyes but did it anyway.

One thing he liked was how his friends somehow started visiting him. Yeol was the first one to do it. He came one day at night and scared him “holy shit Yeol you scared the shit out of me” he said at the sight of his best friend infront of him. “Ah Baekhyun you don’t know the amount of places I’ve visited looking for you, I’ve seen some pretty weird shit dude” Chanyeol said while hugging him. Turns out demons can see demons that visit earth but humans can’t. Chanyeol was the one who found Baekhyun and then his friends started visiting him everyday to hang out with him and play jokes to the nerds upstairs.

He really hated Vancouver. But he loved the coffee at a Kafka’s so he couldn't complain. Especially the day he saw you. You were wearing a “University of Columbia” sweatshirt and some leggings, but you looked so beautiful he couldn’t help but choke with his coffee. He observed as you sat down near the window and left your backpack fall hard in the floor, you had made a lot of noise so everyone looked at you “Sorry hee hee” you said shyly. He giggled but continue watching as you seemed to be falling asleep.

You got interrupted by a barista that said that your cookies were ready to be taken so you took the and left. He followed you to a little park that was basically the “Dude Chilling Park” and you sat and begin to eat you cookies while you looked at your phone. Baekhyun was observing you from afar and was so amazed by your nonchalant way of doing everything: eating, laughing at maybe a meme you saw, looking at your cookies like they were magical and how your hair fell perfectly so that it didn’t hide your face.

He saw you leaving and he decided it was time to go home, since probably his demon friends were at his home playing a joke at Sabrina. And he was right, when he came he saw Sehun and Chen putting oil in the floor outside Sabrina’s house “Hey Baek, Soo is making dinner and Yeol is playing with your xbox.” Baekhyun nodded and went to his apartment, he went directly to the kitchen “Hyung what are you making?” he asked and Kyungsoo didn’t answered, so Baekhyun stole something that he was doing and earned himself a scream. It was a little tradition that the guys went at night to his house and chilled for a while and left at around 12pm.

He started going to Columbia University parties trying to find you, but he never saw you, so he went to the cafe everyday at the same time, but you didn’t appear. He went to the Park to find you laying on grass but this time you were wearing a pink sweatshirt and a white skirt and he thought you couldn’t have looked more beautiful. You were yet again eating pastries but a different ones. You were talking on the phone so he got closer so he could hear you. “Yeah Irene I know he is cute but you know he is incredibly boring” you said while stuffing your mouth with a muffin. This was the first time he heard you voice clearly and it literally made his ears melt. He was pretending to read a book in the grass near you. “Yeah look he’s just not my type, he doesn’t even like oreo like what am supposed to do with someone like that?” He giggled, he couldn’t believe you loved oreo cookies that that was an important request for being your boyfriend. “Look either he starts liking them or where done okay? find me someone cool and funny okay? yEAH I KNOW I SAY OKAY TOO MUCH OKAY?” you were talking with your mouth full and screaming, and he absolutely loved it. You were funny and cute and his stomach was experiencing weird things.

Baekhyun now was really starting to get concerned for what he was feeling, he has never felt this way before. You made his heart flutter with your addiction to pastries and oreos. Your voice was music for his ears and he was always thinking of you. He went everyday to the park and everynight he promised himself he’ll talk to you the next day, but never actually did it. His friends now we're starting to notice something was up.

“Baekhyun you’re acting weird” Sehun said one night. He had been smiling without noticing, thinking about how today you tried to feed a squirrel and got scared that you screamed everytime it came closer. “Huh? Hyung what do you mean?” He asked, and Yeol turned off the TV and turned to look at him. “Baek you had been spacing out and suddenly giggling or smiling without a reason” Chanyeol said looking actually concerned. “You guys is nothing” Baekhyun said trying to hide that he was actually thinking about your hair. “Are you sick?” Sehun asked “What? no dude wtf I’m okay really” And then Chanyeol started looking at Baekhyun suspiciously “Wait a second I know this behavior” Baekhyun started panicking cause his best friend knew him better than no one “Yeol really leave it” Baekhyun stand up and try to leave to his room but Sehun picked him up and sat him in the couch. “YOU’RE IN LOVE” Chanyeol screamed and Sehun fall from the couch. “I’m not in love okay? she doesn’t even KNOW I exist!” Baekhyun said exposing himself. “wAIT she’s human? like actual mortal? like actual girl that dies in a few years?” Sehun said from the floor. “Yah don’t say stuff like that but yeah” Both Chanyeol and Sehun stared at Baekhyun “Wow I mean I never thought this day would come” Chanyeol said “Dude it’s probably temporary its no big deal” Baekhyun said trying to convince himself “Nah ah Hyung that a lie, you’ve been like this for a week already” Sehun said.

Baekhyun sighed and decided to spill everything out “Fine okay? I like this girl really much and I haven’t even talked to her, but I go everyday at the same hour to the same park and watch her eat pastries. She makes me feel warm inside and even wanting to be a human so that I could talk to her normally. There I said it”. Chanyeol looked at his best friend with amazement. He couldn’t believe that this day finally came. “Well why don’t you talk to her?” Sehun questioned “I really have tried but I don’t have the courage, although I try to do nice things for her” Chanyeol laughed at this and said “Look you already know a lot about her since you stalked her” Baekhyun felt himself relax and started laughing. The other two joined him and suddenly they were on the floor dying of laughter. “Look if she likes to eat a lot why don’t you ask Soo to do something for her? and right now we can concentrate on doing a prank on that nerd downstairs.” Chanyeol said and so they did.

The next day Kyungsoo went in the morning and prepared all kinds of pastries that Baekhyun wanted “SOO IT MUST HAVE OREO’S OKAY?” Baekhyun yelled nervously “Oh my god you already told me that ten times could you please shut up?” Baekhyun looked at him and said “No and put more oreos” Baekhyun was really nervous that he made a little zootopia lunch box appear and started putting every pastry there. When they both finished, Baekhyun headed to the park and so you already eating thin oreos.

He could feel his skin burning and sweating all over his shirt, he took a big breath and started walking your direction. ‘God did you really had to look more beautiful today?’ he thought. You were wearing blue jeans and a simple white t-shirt with white vans. Baekhyun stand in front of you and you looked up. “Hi uh I’ve made to many of this and I was wondering if you want some of them?” He asked. ‘Holy fuck he is gorgeous’ you thought. You stood up and saw that he had a little zootopia lunch box “So you happen to have pastries on your zootopia lunch box?” you questioned. Baekhyun was getting nervous “Yeah?” You looked at him for a second and he swear his heart stopped for a second “Yeah okay whatever can I see which ones you have?” You asked while sitting and gesturing him to do the same beside you. He sat down and opened his lunch box with trembling hands “Hey don’t be nervous you’re the one with questiWOW ARE THOSE OREO?” you screamed while taking the little oreo cake that Kyungsoo made. Baekhyun laughed and said “Hey they are not questionable and they are delicious” You looked at him and said “Do you promise me that they don’t have drugs or something in them?” You hold your pinky up to him and he hold it with his “Promise you they only have flour and a few drops of poison” You laughed and ate the lil cake. “Holy mother of God this is the most delicious thing ever where did you get this from?” You were really questioning if they were from heaven. Baekhyun just watched you and touched his pinky “I made them yesterday, I really have a lot of free time” he was just so amazed that he was talking to you that he felt like flying “They’re better than the ones I usually get…” You said looking at him “Maybe I should bring you more one of this days” He smiled at you “Oh my god you can come here whenever you want to” Baekhyun wanted to say ‘that’s what she said’ but he didn’t want to ruin it until you laughed and said “Oh my god THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID HAHAHAHAHA” Baekhyun thought he was dreaming. You were literally his dream girl “You won’t believe me if I told you that’s exactly what I was thinking?” He laughed and watch you eat your cake happily and enjoyed it like it was everything “What’s your name?” He said “Y/N” You said smiling. “Well Y/N if you liked my pastries so much I come here tomorrow and bring you more” You thought he was joking and you said “Maybe you should mister…?” “Baekhyun” Wow did his name was beautiful. “Well nice to meet you mister Baekhyun” You said smiling.

You finished maybe all of his pastries and he insisted he didn’t care and that tomorrow he’d bring you more amazing one’s. You actually liked him. He was funny and you both shared a sense of humor so similar that soon enough became comfortable around him. He wasn’t like the other guys you’ve met. He was actually charming by nature but not too much. He told you funny things like him having to clean his neighbour Sabrina’s underwear and he promised you he would introduce you two, since you told him she was your role model after that. You had to leave for class but didn’t want to leave him so you made him promised he’d come tomorrow. You did asked him to make a lot of pinky promises and he loved it. Even if only touching your pinky was the closest he could get for now, he was absolutely okay with it.

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Hii tell me if you liked it I will make chapter 1 later hee hee

#baekhyun #baekhyun aesthetic #baekhyun fanfic #exo baekhyun fanfic #demon baekhyun #byun baekhyun #exo scenarios #exo imagines #exo #exo baekhyun #chanyeol #chen #kyungsoo #demon au

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tjkiahgb · 6 years ago

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Episode Recap: 3.06, “Cookie Monster”

Well, another week running a humorous (in theory) Andi Mack blog. Can’t wait to make jokes about what happens on the show this episode.

Let’s just check the episode title.

Nice, nice. Sounds funny. Lighthearted. I can do something with this.

*cracks knuckles*

Well, let’s get to work--

Oh? Children and guns. Ok. That’s... that’s a little dark.

But, I mean, I can probably still make this fun if I--

Ah, real life tragedy. Ok then.

Well, I certainly hope there’s at least another storyline in this episode that’s like, some kind of wacky, weird Invasion of the Body Snatchers type homage? I could definitely make jokes about that.

*crosses fingers*

Our episode begins with Andi, Bowie, and Bex at Bex’s place playing the Andi Game, which is where you just say stuff you know about Andi.

Bex is wiping the floor with Bowie by knowing lots of things about Andi like that she doesn’t like any condiments. None? How do you eat french fries? How do you eat tortilla chips? Dry? Who lives like that?

Bex taunts Bowie for losing. Bowie says it’s not fair, Bex and Andi have spent way more time together. I agree, the game is rigged. Just wait until they play the “How much do you know about The Renaissance Boys?” game. Then it’ll be Bowie’s time to shine.

Bex asks whose fault it is that Bowie hasn’t spent more time with Andi and Bowie’s like, it’s yours.

Which is such a valid point that Bex chooses to immediately ignore it and move on.

There’s a knock at the door and Bowie goes to check who it is. Turns out, it’s a tiny old lady whom Bowie refers to as “Mom.” She calls him “Steven” and they hug.

Bex tells Andi that Bowie’s actual first name is Steven. His license that one episode said Bowie, though, so did he change it legally? Why? “Steve Quinn” is a great name for a guitarist. It’s one of those names like Eric Clapton or Jeff Beck where you’re like, “That’s such a boring name, they have to be a good guitarist. They let the guitar do the talking.” Calling yourself “Bowie” is trying too hard. I guess that’s why The Renaissance Boys failed and Bowie’s stuck teaching guitar to some weird father/son duo in the back of a small record store.

Bowie’s mom, Cookie, goes around giving hugs to everyone.

Andi asks if it’s true Cookie lives on cruise ships. Cookie says yes, it’s like living in an apartment where your neighbors serve you drinks in coconuts. And, might I add, you also get the added excitement of knowing that one day your apartment building might sink into the ocean and drown you. So there’s that, too.

Cookie sees the mess they’re living in and offers to make the family dinner.

And dinner she makes, whipping together this...

...out of the stuff she had in her suitcase.

The family tries to figure out how this happened and Cookie says she never goes anywhere without a roast chicken, which is maybe the craziest thing anyone’s ever said on this show. I’d take it metaphorically except she really did literally have a chicken in her bag, otherwise where did this one come from?

And what was her plan if everyone had already eaten a nice meal? Leave the roast chicken just sitting in her suitcase with her clothes? Open the bag every now and then and pick at the meat like a vulture? Her neighbors on the cruise ship must hate her. “Oh God, here comes that lady that smells like chicken all the time. Just give her a coconut drink and she’ll leave you alone.”

Anyway, the family is so amazed to see food not served from a box, they don’t question any of this and sit down to eat.

At school the next day, TJ finds Cyrus in the hallway to ask him if he wants to hang out that weekend with his friends.

Cyrus is delighted to learn TJ has been talking about him to his other friends. I feel that. It’s just nice to be talked about, even if you’re not there. It’s why I leave every party by yelling “Later, suckers!” real loud and smashing a vase.

They agree to hang out and Cyrus calls his mom to let her know he’s been a topic of discussion.

Meanwhile, Buffy and Jonah walk to school. Buffy tells Jonah she likes his skateboard so he gives it to her.

They talk about going to the skate shop that weekend and have a fun time bantering back and forth until Principal Metcalf pounces on them and takes away the skateboard.

He can smell children having a nice time in his vicinity like a fun-killing bloodhound.

At Bex’s house, Bex and Bowie return to find Cookie has rearranged the furniture. Cookie asks if they love it and they don’t have the heart to tell her they don’t.

Bex wants to tell Cookie she’s not a fan of her coming in here and moving everything around without asking but then Cookie shows up with cookies like some kind of bribe and suddenly Bex can’t remember what upset her in the first place.

Out in the desert, TJ and his friends ride dirtbikes to off-brand rock n’ roll when Cyrus shows up.

TJ introduces him to his other friends, Lester and Reed.

Hold on one second. Lester? What in the world?

No one’s named their baby Lester in 150 years. In fact, I don’t believe in such a thing as a kid named Lester. Lester is the kind of name you only get as a middle aged adult. You wake up one day after turning 45, you realize you’re caught in a dead-end sales job, your hair is thinning, your face is getting droopy, and your dreams are unrealized. Then you check your wallet and see your ID has changed and it now says your name is Lester. And you accept that. You know why? Because you’re a Lester, and that’s what Lesters do. (Apologies to anyone reading this whose name is Lester, but, in my defense, I don’t believe you exist.)

I’ll tell you what Lesters don’t do: ride dirtbikes to off-brand rock n’ roll songs. Something’s up with this guy.

Anyway, TJ invites Cyrus to ride a dirtbike but Cyrus says he fears everything and that makes Reed laugh. Then Reed wishes to laugh more and he’s like, “Dance, clown!”

And Cyrus is like, I make observational humor. Reed laughs, appreciating that line from a meta-perspective.

Eventually they get Cyrus to try riding and TJ teaches him the in-and-outs of dirtbike usage.

Cyrus rides around on the bike and tries to make it up a hill. After a few failed attempts, and with encouragement from TJ and the others, Cyrus does something physical without hurting himself.

He does lose his shoe, though. However, as Cyrus notes, that’s really his brand at this point. He’s got lost shoes all over the county.

Andi returns home and finds her parents have become pod people.

Cookie has swaddled them and they no longer wish to live outside their cocoons. They want to change the channel but can’t, so Bowie calls for “Mommy.”

This episode’s got an aggressively strange energy to it.

Cookie tries to trap Andi in her web of motherly comfort, but Andi runs off before she can.

Over at Lost Art Skateboards...

...the one-stop shop for all your skateboarding and tattoo needs, Jonah and Buffy check out skate decks.

Buffy notices that Jonah doesn’t ever say “Docious magocious” anymore. Jonah feels like he grew out of it. I might argue there’s no age where docious magocious was ever a reasonable thing to say, but I guess we have different opinions on that sort of thing.

Buffy says she actually used to like when he said it. Jonah’s surprised because she used to make fun of it, but that’s why Buffy liked it.

Buffy spots the tattoo parlor connected to the skate shop and they go to check it out. They see a man there getting a tattoo and don’t immediately recognize him.

Yep, definitely not the profile of anyone they’ve ever seen before.

They talk about how crazy it is to get that many tattoos and whaaa--

It’s the principal?!

Jonah and Buffy run away like they just caught him chopping up a body in the woods.

Andi talks to Celia about her Cookie problem. See, Andi loves everything Cookie does, but everything about what’s she’s doing around the house feels weird and off-putting. Agree wholeheartedly.

Celia decides she’ll go check the situation out.

Back in the desert, Lester and Reed set up watermelons.

Cyrus has a question: are these watermelons for a watermelon eating contest? Love it. Love the thought process.

You ever just want to take a Saturday to go out to the desert with your bros, ride some dirtbikes, and then just chow down on watermelon? And preferably, chow down on that watermelon in some kind of competition of speed? I know I do.

I have a different question: whose job was it to lug three large watermelons out to the desert on their dirtbike? Lester, right? Freakin’ Lester.

Reed’s like, we aren’t eating the watermelons, we’re shooting them. Though, they could eat them after. No need to let perfectly good watermelon go to waste.

But the point is, the watermelons have to go pppffffghhttt first.

Or however you spell that. I feel like I’m missing some S’s in there?

And the only way for the watermelons to dopely go pppfffghhttt is to shoot them. Cyrus wants to know how they intend to shoot them and Reed shows him a bag. Cyrus’s face drops. Why?

Because inside the bag is Grandpappy Reed’s antique revolver from during the war. Not that Reed’s grandpa fought in the war. He also went out to the desert to shoot watermelons. It was a difficult time in our nation’s history and he needed to blow off steam.

Anyway, Reed’s Grandpa handed it down to his son, and then Reed stole it from him, and now it’s here, making Cyrus uncomfortable.

Cyrus goes to TJ to ask if he knew about the gun. TJ did. Cyrus says he’s leaving and he wants TJ to go with him, but TJ can’t bring himself to leave.

So Cyrus heads off alone.

Well that was a deep and dramatic moment. I wonder how we’re going to proceed from here.

Oh.

Andi finds her grandmother wrapped in a blanket, covered in food crumbs, and watching TV. Cookie made her a cookie and Celia was roped in.

Andi wanders into the kitchen and finds Cookie attempting to cut Bowie’s hair. She screams “No!” in panic.

She forces her other grandmother to drop the scissors, then pulls her away from the hair.

Bowie quietly watches this happen, then, without saying anything, reaches down, grabs a lollipop, sticks it in his mouth, and starts happily sucking on it.

Aggressively strange energy in this episode, man. Aggressively strange.

Andi talks to Cookie, who explains she’s being like this because she doesn’t get to see her family a lot so when she does, the mom thing kicks in. Plus being excited to meet Andi and all that.

Cookie says she has a gift for Andi. It’s a picture of Bowie as a baby eating dog biscuits.

This somehow answers and raises so many questions at the same time.

Bowie walks out and asks Cookie if she’s really leaving, and Cookie, like an old mariner, says yes, the seas are a-calling.

Andi and Cookie share one last hug before parting.

At school the next day, Jonah and Buffy dread running into Metcalf.

They hope to avoid him for the entire year. But they should know better than to show fear, because they emit a fear scent and that brings Metcalf right to them.

He admits it was weird for him, too, to run into them. He asks if they want to know about his tattoos and of course they do. He explains they’re all prison based. Or not. They’re based on him just wanting a tattoo. Or other stuff. I don’t know. We’re running out of time in this episode and gotta wrap things up so there’s no time to really get into it.

Metcalf’s like, guess you think I’m pretty cool now, huh? And Buffy’s like, no, you’ve ruined tattoos for me, thanks.

And Metcalf’s like, oh.

Then he rolls down his sleeve and runs off before Buffy and Jonah can see him cry. Buffy and Jonah fist bump in celebration of ruining Metcalf’s day.

Wow, way to make me feel bad for that lunatic.

Cyrus and Andi head to Metcalf’s office. Cyrus has come to tell him about the gun. He’s worried TJ will hate him for this.

Andi argues he could very well be saving TJ’s life.

Cyrus finds the courage to go in, but Metcalf meets him at the door. He invites him in and Cyrus finds a police officer waiting for him.

Cyrus wants to know if something happened, but Metcalf tells him everyone’s ok. The officer just has some questions. About the gun.

And you know the gun is a serious issue because even the police in this town don’t carry them.

Cyrus says he came in here to tell about the gun, but he’s surprised to find they already know.

Cyrus admits to being there and wants to know if he’s in trouble but the episode ends before we can find out.

So many questions up in the air:

1. Will Cyrus be in legal trouble just for being in the vicinity of a gun for a few seconds?

2. Who told them about the gun?

and, most importantly,

3. What kind of person names their child Lester?!

Come back in two weeks to find out the answers, Macketeers.

Except for the one about Lester. The world may never figure that one out.

#Andi Mack #Cyrus Goodman #Buffy Driscoll #TJ Kippen #Bex Mack #Bowie Quinn #Cookie Quinn #Dr. Metcalf #Reed #Lester #Celia Mack #Andi #episode recaps

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spacymuses · 5 years ago

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♦ gimme the disney aus (visits or them suffering as cast members)

ohohoHOHOHOHO–

Gonna cut this one because you know it’s gonna be a long post.

Luca

Being from an established showbiz family in Los Angeles that was definitely well-off enough to afford annual passes, Luca visited Disneyland a lot as a child. By the time he was born, his oldest brother was old enough to take them on his own, so he usually just went with his siblings. It wasn’t really fun for him for a while–his brothers kind of were annoyed at having to drag this much younger kid around when all they wanted to do was go ride all the big thrill rides he was too small for.

Things got better after his little sister Anna started coming with them. The older kids could go on all the roller coasters, and Luca could just take Anna on the tea cups or the Winnie the Pooh ride or whatever.

Up until the point where Anna was old enough for the thrill rides, and then she absolutely just wanted to ride the thrill rides.

Walt Disney would’ve been Luca’s hero though. Commercializing whimsy and nostalgia to such an extent that your company is basically synonymous with American childhood? Life goals.

His favorite Disney Parks food were the Mickey beignets at the Mint Julep Bar.

Aki

AKI STOLE BUZZY. IT WAS HER.

Really it’s kind of hard to imagine Aki going to any Disney Park though. She’s not going to ride any rides, and though crowds means good pick-pocketing if she were still in the thief life, her MO was more corporations and art galleries and not families on vacation.

She’d love the food though. I can see her hanging out at, like, Disney Springs/Downtown Disney and just chilling out with a cupcake and a coffee to people-watch.

Her favorite Disney Parks food would be the salted caramel cupcake from Karamell Kuche in Epcot or the rose cupcake from Boardwalk Bakery.

Lucius

It him

Does he hate theme parks? Yes. Is he the parent of a tiny child? Yes. He’s going at least once.

Realistically though it probably would just be like, once. Celia is an extremely anxious little kid and gets stressed out and scared in crowds, so theme parks are difficult for her. And then she’d get more stressed out because she definitely wanted to go to Disney World, but feels bad for not having a great time. Lucius is very good at telling when maybe she just needs a little downtime at the resort.

Letting Celia ride on his shoulders also helps calm her down when she’s upset, and she loves getting (what a five year old would consider) a birds’ eye view of the park as they walk around.

You know what always works though? A ride on Spaceship Earth. Let me and my kid take a nap in an air-conditioned room for 15 minutes while Judy Dench tells us about history. We’ll be ready for Soarin’ in no time.

Lucius taking Celia to the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique! She went with the Elsa makeover, Elsa is her favorite.

His favorite Disney Parks food would be the Citrus Swirl at Sunshine Tree Terrace in Epcot.

Ciro

He loves ALL the thrill rides, but Rock ‘n Rollercoaster is his SHIT. He does a pretty solid impression of the Steve Tyler countdown before the coaster launches in the beginning, and yes, he will repeat it every time. Along with that “HELLO HOLLYWOOD”

Doesn’t really do the fireworks shows or parades. More people watching them means less people in the line for Space Mountain so he can ride it for the third time today.

Has actually been to a bunch of the international parks, usually just if he was in the country on business anyway and happened to have a day or two off. The only one he hasn’t made it out to at least once is Disneyland Paris. He REALLY would’ve liked the Iron Man Experience in HK Disneyland.

His favorite Disney Parks food is the turkey leg because it is a BIG MEAT and he is gonna EAT IT.

Kira

Has not been to a Disney park and probably never will. Her family did like, ski trips and horseriding and other Rich English Kid Stuff for their fun summer holidays, theme parks were not the Isherwoods’ scene.

If she did go you would probably catch her chatting up ladies at a poolside bar at one of the resorts, most likely trying to impress them with random facts about the park that she found on Wikipedia 25 minutes ago.

Her favorite Disney Parks food would be the Maine lobster at Victoria & Albert’s.

Reema

REEMA AS A CAST MEMBER THOUGH.

I googled the Disney cast member auditions’ page to get a better idea of what they might be doing, and came across one for Star Wars face characters that said in the middle of an otherwise very businesslike audition sheet, “You must be able to reproduce an imperial march with a cadenced approach.” That’s admittedly not Reema, but that line made me laugh a lot for some reason, so please imagine Reema getting cast as a Storm Trooper and doing their level best to do a military-style march with no added dramatic flourish.

No but really they’d hate being a Storm Trooper, let them be in one of the full-body costumes so they can embrace their talent for hyper-exaggerated movement. They’d do well in pretty much any of them, but I could especially see maybe Joy, Dale, or Tigger. Honestly, I could see them doing pretty damn well as Mickey or Minnie Mouse.

Their family lives in Miami so they’re close enough to visit the park every now and again. Their mom asks “hey are u my child” to every mascot character she comes across until she finds Reema.

Their favorite Parks food is the churros

Claudia

Honestly the Parks in general would just blow her away. So many people, so much to see, so much packed into literally every corner. She would end up spending a good hour or so just browsing around Main Street, wandering through every single shop, and taking in the atmosphere. Something new distracts her every second. Don’t let her out of your sight or you’re gonna lose her.

Claudia wants to do everything. Country Bear Jamboree? Let’s go. Carousel of Progress? We’re already in line. The 360-degree O Canada show in Epcot? Sign her the fuck up. It would actually kind of overwhelm her because everywhere she looks there’s more to see and do and literally no way of doing it all on one trip.

Please imagine her riding the Prince Charming Carrousel with the most Stoic Expression.

She’s gonna listen to Sonny Eclipse’s entire set.

She is okay on the thrill rides but doesn’t enjoy them as much as the slower dark rides and things like It’s a Small World. Haunted Mansion is weird for her, she already has 999 Happy Haunts inside her sword so these others are just overkill.

Her favorite Parks food are the hot dogs at Casey’s. And Dole Whip. And popcorn. And turkey legs. And the Grey Stuff cupcakes at Be Our Guest. And churros. And the Cheshire Cat tails. And the Mickey-shaped ice cream bars. And the Mickey-shaped pretzels. And the Mickey-shaped rice krispie treats. And the Mickey-shaped cake pops. And the Mickey-shaped candy apples. And the Minnie-shaped candy apples. And funnel cake. And the school bread in Epcot. And the caramel corn in Epcot. And the corn dogs. And the kitchen sink sundae. And--yeah you know what literally everything is Claudia’s favorite please just let her stop at all the snack stands.

#stahl konigin #[headcanons] canons from my head

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lovelyirony · 6 years ago

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Checkmate

@thormlm

Tony Carbonell was good at what he did. He knew it, no one else did. Why? Because again. He was good at what he did. Tony stole stuff. Not snacks from the convenience store, not jewelry from an old lady’s home.

Documents that incriminated some syndicate. Paintings that no one in public had seen them. (Van Gogh had a crazy other side to his paintings, it was wicked.) And mostly, scammed enough people into forgetting his face. He was John Howard, Arno Stark, whoever he needed to be. He was not Tony Carbonell. He was just another face in the crowd. That’s how it was meant to be.

There’s a new cop in town. “Corrupt,” or so they say. Not corrupt, just a little bit more willing to get criminals in jail than most. They call him Captain. He’s also known as Steven Grant Rogers, served in the army for three years, honorably discharged. Awards and honors out the ass, a degree in art history, and a talent for making posters for local events on the side.

Captain is smart. He knows exactly where Tony’s kind hangs out, where they get information, and just what they call Tony.

They call Tony “Iron Man.” It’s a stupid nickname, earned a few years earlier when Tony did a job involving a safe. No one knew how he did it. How the safe was opened, because no one had accessed it in months. And then, of course, they don’t look at who accessed it all those months before. Who pays attention the morning cleaners?

Tony got in, he got out. No combination, just DNA processing. They don’t know how he did it, because a.) the man was dead, and it requires a recognizable strand of DNA to be done. b.) there were no relatives that thieves knew of.

Keyword: knew.

Tony robbed his own father, which really most people would have a problem. But as it turns out, Howard Stark was a piece of shit, and Tony really thought that the ruby cuff links and stacks of cash deserved to see the light of day and not rot in an iron safe in some “secure” bank.

But that’s not the point, is it? The point is that Tony has to deal with Black Widow texting him “lol ur in deep shit” with a screenshot of Steve Rogers texting someone that he would get Iron Man.

Which, you know, is great. Wonderful. Tony loves that he’s being pursued by a man with more resources than he needs to catch Tony. He loves knowing this all before he gets his coffee, the one that’s flavored Amaretto, and just sitting in his kitchen saying “shit.” He loves life. Wow. Tony wishes he could live forever, this is amazing news! Great, Tony might die!

Fact: criminals who are convinced that they will never get caught are the worst. Tony has met many criminals who boast and say they will never get caught. He smiles, says “okay”, and watches from the back of the courtroom as they get sentenced to forty years in prison, rotting. Tony knows that eventually, he may get caught. But he’ll get to that when he gets to it.

Tony calls Pepper first. She is his lawyer that he loves more than life itself, even though she has called him “an inconvenient goblin” and “really, Tony? This again?” She loves him, though. He knows that she does. So when he calls her and says

“Hey Pepper, I’m in deep shit! Fun!” She knows Exactly what’s going to go down. Someone is onto Iron Man. Which means that she is on standby just in case things go haywire.

“You might want to call Jim,” Pepper says. “You know how he gets when people threaten you.”

“Overprotective?”

“Careful,” Pepper suggests. “He’s not overprotective, you’re just reckless and paranoid.”

“Those who aren’t paranoid die, Pep. Consider me an expert on that.” Once upon a time, Tony had not been paranoid.

Then there was a car crash. An uncle who smiled and said it was so unfortunate, would Tony like to go on a trip to forget about it? Dubai, maybe? And then Tony ended up in Afghanistan where he was supposed to die.

But that’s the thing, sometimes, about Paranoia: it gets you out of some weird situations. Tony was supposed to die. But he’s just paranoid enough of dying that it didn’t happen.

Tony calls Rhodey up anyway. “Hello Rhodey! How are you today? I am doing Fantastically Wonderful, It’s So Nice Outside, What? No, I’m Not Bullshitting You--”

“Yeah, you are. What’d you do?”

“It’s more of what I’m about to do.”

“If you’re finally buying that Danny Devito cardboard cutout, I’m legitimately cutting you out of my will.”

“You can die?”

“This life around? Yes. What’s your point?”

“The Captain is coming after my ass.”

“Like...in a sexy way?” Tony splutters.

“You are Unbelieve, no, not that way. I cannot believe you thought that within, like, two months of knowing about the Captain, that he would even look my way.”

“So he’s looking your way,” Rhodey says. “But in a ‘I might be murdered’ type of way?”

“Exactly,” Tony responds. “So I may die in a couple of months to a year.”

Rhodey laughs. “You’re so stupid, no you’re not. You ate an egg roll from a gas station in the middle of nowhere and you survived. It’s fine.”

“I really feel like you’re not getting the severity of the situation,” Tony says. “The Captain is trying to catch me. And he knows more than enough about the criminal world to actually get the job done. He knows people.”

“Like who?” Rhodey says. “The guy’s in the police force. He just got awarded for rescuing a cat, I hardly doubt that the people he knows can actually pull this off.” He’s kind of laughing. “I got your back.”

“Against the Winter Soldier?”

Silence.

“Oh fuck. You’re screwed. You’re so screwed. Do you know how screwed you are?”

“Screwed as a nail,” Tony mutters. “So I’m going off the grid. I’ll catch you in a year or something. I don’t know. Off-the-grid schedules are tricky.”

“Don’t do anything weird, okay? Don’t, like, blow up the White House or something to escape.”

“I don’t have access to that much C-4,” Tony quips. “Bye, honey bear.”

Line goes dead. Phone gets smashed. Easy peasy, lemon whatever.

Tony has fine taste. He’s not gonna deny that much. He has Italian leather shoes, pants specifically tailored for his legs and ass, and a passion for the finer side of thread-counts and furniture. All acquired through a man who goes by Bruce and Bruce only. He used to be a radiation scientist, Tony actually knows about him. But then something went haywire, he has anger issues, and refuses to talk about deep-seated issues. Can you believe?

But Tony walks to the store, unassuming and beige with everything else. Ugh. Tony hates beige.

“Bruce! I have a favor to ask!”

“Yeah, what is it?” Bruce says. “If it’s murder, I charge money for my no-doubt-eventual-counselling sessions.”

“Nonsense,” Tony says. “I’m not doing murder, and the only thing I need for you to do is deny that I’ve ever shopped here.”

“Why?”

“Bruce, only scientists ask questions like ‘who’, ‘what’, ‘where’, ‘when’, and the damning ‘why’. You don’t need to know.”

“You forgot the ‘how’, Tony.”

“Damn your perception,” Tony says, light and cheery. He’s actually teetering between the line of “Is this Okay or is it Anxiety Time,” which is better than a lot of other lines he’s teetered on. (One was literal, too, which is not good for your state of health if you’re not trained to go on tightropes, by the way.) “Anyway, promise not to tell anyone that you sell me good cotton sheets?”

“Sure,” Bruce says. “But you also can’t tell anyone where you got the sheets.”

“Never have, probably never will,” Tony says cheerily. “Talk to you maybe later!”

And then comes a text. I’ve been assigned to come after you. Headstart of one hour.

Well, fuck. Just because you’re friends with Black Widow doesn’t actually mean that she refuses to take jobs referring to Iron Man. She hasn’t refused any, but she also hasn’t been given any.

I’ll double the sum they’re paying.

They have blackmail on me, you can’t double that. They know more about me than you.

Even that you like cherry-nut ice cream?

Less than one hour, Iron Man.

So then, Tony has to do something drastic. He may have told his driver/friend/low-key criminal hitman Happy to pose as him, buy a ticket to France, and actually get on the plane. Natasha doesn’t kill those she isn’t assigned to. And she’s real good with faces, so she’ll know when he turns that it isn’t Tony.

Tony actually gets to an apartment in Brooklyn. It’s his back-up apartment, technically owned by his mother. His mother hates Brooklyn, refuses to go anywhere near the area, and doesn’t technically know that she owns an apartment in Brooklyn. Tony finds it funny.

He’s wearing a t-shirt that he likes, jeans that he hates, and lugging some boxes in. Maintain the cover.

“Hey,” comes a voice behind him. “Looks like we’re neighbors. I’m Steve.”

It takes everything in Tony’s willpower to not just whip the knife out of his pocket, but you can’t do that to neighbors you just met. Even if they signed a contract with Black Widow to get you and maybe-kill you.

“I’m Tony,” Tony says, because he is an Idiot Under Stress. “Nice to meet you, Steve.”

They talk. For an hour. Steve is surprisingly funny for a guy who wants to kill him. Steve likes appetizers at restaurants, does art as a hobby, and wants to own a dog. He also used to be allergic to peanut butter but isn’t anymore, and isn’t that the Funniest thing? Tony half-laughs and says “yeah, it is,” and then Steve says it.

“So, what do you do for a living?”

Tony does a lot of things. He stole a Renoir. He also has sixty thousand dollars in an off-shore bank account. Which actually isn’t a bank account because Tony doesn’t like banks, but more of a dresser in a house in Manhattan Island.

“I’m, um, tech support,” Tony says.

“Really? I’m sure that’s interesting,” Steve says. “A lot of asking people to reboot their computers, huh?”

“You have no idea,” Tony mutters. “Well, as lovely as it has been getting to know you, I need to get everything set up. See you around?”

“Definitely!”

Tony shuts the door, sits on the couch, and looks out the window.

He can do this. It’s like a game of chess: you just need strategy. Tony used to play all the old guys in Central Park in chess, you could probably call him an expert at this point. Maybe. He’s not exactly sure of all the rules, some old guys made up their own. But still. He could do this.

(Rhodey would be laughing at him right about now if he could see this predicament.)

#this was based off a post i made yesterday about tony knowing all the moves before you even made the first one #yeah it's fun #stony #steve rogers #tony stark #captain america #Iron Man #yeah buddy this is fun #i like this #lovelyirony writes #tony: chill but Not Really #this was infinitely longer than i had originally planned #oops

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lightyagamiis · 6 years ago

Text

kissing booth - one

Pairing: reader x tom holland Genre: some fluff and maybe some future smut. kissing booth au Warnings: none Word Count: 1.8k *inspired by the netflix film kissing booth but with my own twists*

next part

February 14, 1999, you and your twin sister were born into this world.

Also on February 14, 1999, another pair of twins were born. Sam and Harry Holland.

Another crazy thing, your mothers are also very best friends. So of course, these set of twins grew up together, being best friends as well.

Your twin is super close with Harry, meanwhile, you’re close with Sam.

The four of you grew up being inseparable. Of course, being neighbors helped with that.

The Hollands were a bigger family compared to your own.

Your family only had your parents and you and your twin Emily, but the Hollands has the youngest Paddy, the twins Sam and Harry and then the oldest...Tom.

Tom is three years older, so that’s not exactly a big deal though...right?

Even though the set of twins were inseparable, you did have your little duos. Harry and Emily were more of the adventurist type. As children, they would drag Sam and yourself across every park in your town. It was their goal to climb every tree in every park. And because of that, both you and Sam ended up on crutches for nine months. The four of you were only five at the time. Sucks to be a five-year-old running around your first year of school on crutches. Not fun at all.

Sam and yourself weren’t all so adventurous. The two of you preferred going to the arcade or riding bikes around the town of getting ice cream at your favorite place or just ya know, sitting around the house reading a good book or playing video games together.

At age sixteen, Harry and Emily were allowed to go across the country for a hiking trail. Your parents and Sam’s parents went along with them.

Of course, Sam and yourself were happy that they didn’t tag the two of you along.

But that left you guys stuck with Paddy and Tom for a whole week.

Paddy was ten at the time and Tom was nineteen, so that left Tom being in charge of watching over us.

But it was also the day you realized you kinda liked Tom, more than just in a friend way.

You were reading your favorite book in the living room of the Holland’s home. Cuddled underneath your favorite baby blue blanket and a bowl of popcorn on the table.

Tom comes in from being outside with Sam and Paddy in the pool, dripping wet...and without a shirt on…

You rolled your eyes, seeing Tom walk into the house not only dripping wet but whatever putting his shirt back on.

You narrowed your eyes at him, and he slowly looks up at you after dusting his bare feet off from the dirt that attached.

“What?” He asked confused.

“You know exactly what Thomas, put on a shirt. You know your mother would kill you if she knew you walked in here without proper clothing on with a lady in the house.” You snapped.

Tom smirked, “lady? Where? I don’t see one.”

Your mouth opened wide as you gasped at his comment.

You close your book and throw it across the room at him. Of course, he has fast reflexes and shifts to the right, making your book fly and hit the wall.

“Sam is going to kill you for making that comment.”

“Nah,” Tom snickered, “he’d have to catch me first.”

He picked up your book, slowly walking it over to you and glancing at the title.

You hated Tom, or for awhile you hated him. He always made fun of you or teased you about something. It got worse as you got older.

But there was only one thing you didn’t hate about him, and that was he would defend you, Emily, Sam and Harry if anyone messed with us at school. Tom always said nobody and he repeats nobody, would fuck with his family.

But you still hated him for literally everything else.

“Chaos Walking huh?” Tom said still looking at the cover. “I read the books, pretty great series I do have to say so myself.”

As he hands you back your book you carefully looked up at him, “since when do you read books? Only thing I’ve ever seen you touch has been scripts for theater.”

Tom smirked and winked at you, “I stole them from your house when your family went on vacation.”

You reach over and slap Tom in the arm, “what have I said about stealing my stuff!”

Tom snickers as he rubbed the now red print of his arm that you left, “Calm down I put them back didn’t I?” He walks over to the kitchen, “besides, they were great books. No harm in reading a good book huh?”

You rolled your eyes and opened up the book to find where you left off. “What’s your deal with stealing my books anyways. It’s not the first time you’ve done it. You’ve stolen my Spider-man comics too.”

“Who knows, maybe Chaos Walking will be a movie someday, and when it does they’ll need someone to play Todd.”

You look up from your book, “ha! As if they’ll choose someone like you to play Todd.”

Tom softly snickers. You watch him open up the fridge and pull out a bottle of water, and for the first time, everything about Tom catches your attention. His muscles, the tone of his skin, how his curls fell over his eyes as he looked downward, how his jawline could literally cut diamonds.

You never paid much attention to Tom, it took until just now to realize how much he has actually grown up. Thomas Stanley Holland was no longer a boy, he was a man.

Tom glances up at you as he opens the bottle and placed the plastic between his lips, gently laughing as he swallows the liquid.

“I think I’d be a very good Todd.” He spoke with a sigh, “I just need to have the ones I love to have faith in me.”

The two of you made eye contact, it was the first time you 100% stared deeply into his eyes.

Tom slowly walked forward back into the living room, and you could have sworn he walked with such a grace.

You both broke the stare when soaked Paddy and dried Sam walk into the house.

“Tom! Tom! Look what I found!” Paddy said showing his older brother a small gecko in his hands.

“Woah buddy that’s so cool, why don’t we take him back outside so he can find his family?”

“I tried to tell him to leave it alone,” Sam sighed, “but he wouldn’t listen.”

“Well that’s no problem now is it Paddy? We’ll take him right back outside.” Tom said picking up Paddy into his arms and walking back to the door.

Your eyes followed Tom, staring at his muscular back.

“Hey hey!” Sam snaps his fingers, directing your attention back to him, “rule number five!”

You roll your eyes and get situated back on the couch looking down at your book, “yeah yeah Sam I know. Don’t worry. Not interested.”

Something inside you sparked that day, you didn’t want to admit it, but you also couldn’t deny it.

Speaking of these so-called rules Sam mentioned.

When the two of you were nine years old you decided to set down some ground rules for your friendship.

•Rule number one: you two always had to sit beside each other at your birthday parties. •Rule number two: always share food regardless of what it was. •Rule number three: we couldn’t ever go to the ice cream shop without the other. •Rule number four: no secrets. •Rule number five: siblings are off limits. •Rule number six: always give the other confidence at everything. •Rule number seven: no lying to each other. •and finally, rule number eight: stand by the others side no matter what.

You didn’t exactly remember why you two decided to make up these rules, but since age nine you’ve both followed them like they were a crazy religion.

Now it’s time to fast forward to age nineteen. The set of twins decide to attend the same university together despite the different majors we’ve chosen.

The four of you just couldn’t handle not going to the same school together. Like you’ve said before, inseparable.

Tom is now twenty-two doing who knows what. He has landed a perfect career as an actor, meanwhile attending university for theater.

And the three years that have past since that day, that spark for Tom has only grown stronger, yet you continue to ignore it not only for your sake but also Sam’s.

——

“Ugh, it’s so hot!” Sam complained has he fanned himself with his hands, “why did we decide it was a good idea to sit outside instead of being inside where the AC is?”

You turned your page in the book you’re reading, not moving your eyes from the words on the paper, “because we need some sunlight in our lives you know?”

“Ugh” Sam grunts some more until a light bulbs turn on in his head, “Y/N?”

“Hmm?”

“Rule number three.”

“You want to get ice cream?”

“Please! It’ll help this summer day be a little bit cooler.”

“You have a swimming pool, Sam.”

“Ugh come on Y/N!” Sam begs, “we literally got home from university yesterday and I’ve been craving Joe’s ice cream.”

You look up at your best friend, pulling out the puppy dog eyes and everything, “Ugh! Okay fine! Let’s go. I guess I could use some ice cream as well.”

Sam’s puppy face turned to the familiar smile you knew and loved, of course seeing his smile made you smile.

You closed your book and followed Sam out to his car, but on the way there you ran into Emily and Harry with bags packed in their hands.

“Where on earth are you two going?” You questioned.

“We decided we couldn’t handle spending the whole summer at home,” Emily said.

“So we decided to take a two-week vacation.” Harry said finishing Emily’s sentence. Which is something they’ve always done. They are literally soulmates in a best friend way.

“But we all literally got home yesterday, why go now?” Sam questioned his twin.

“Well, just think if we go now then we can all go on adventures when we get back?” Harry suggested.

“No thanks, have fun.” Sam shrugged.

“You’re missing out Sam Sam!” Emily said giving Sam a quick hug.

“Y/N, don’t have too much fun reading books the whole two weeks, okay?” Emily smirked at you, you rolled your hugs and embraced your sister.

“I’ll try not too.”

She released you and skipped over to Harry’s car, “See ya later bitches!” Emily chuckled.

“Hey rule ten!” Harry said pointing to Emily.

“Sorryyyyyy.”

Sam and yourself watched them climb into the vehicle and drive away.

“Is it just me or is it still weird that after all these years they completely copied us with rules.” Sam sighed.

“Well, at least we don’t have eighteen like they do.” You said slightly punching your best friend.

“Thank god!” Sam giggled, “now, let’s go get that ice cream!”

#tom holland #fluff #smutt #spiderman #spiderman homecoming #kissingbooth #kissing booth #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfiction #mywriting

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notorious-fiction · 7 years ago

Text

The Christmas Prince (A Whoever You Want to Read With One-Shot)

You two had made a deal.

Shook hands and all, very solemn looks on your faces, promising one another a very simple thing.

No gift exchanging on Christmas day.

(You'd just been laid off your job and it sucked balls, and he knew money was a bit short on your end and also knew you would never, in a gazillion years accept any money from him, so he started to come up with a bunch of lame ass excuses to make you feel a bit better.)

("It's cliché", he had snorted when you touched the subject "Exchanging Christmas gifts. Ugh. It was meaningful before but now it's just another "especial" date that lost it's core value to boost capitalism. I mean, you can be a crappy boyfriend all year round as long as you buy your girl an extra glittery Hallmark card and a Tiffany Bracelet, right?")

("Right." You had agreed, although not really, because as much as you found sexy as fuck when he used pretty words - core value, damn - you still flipping loved Christmas and looked forward to it all year long.)

So no gift exchanging it was.

You'd spend Christmas day with you family and he would spend it with his - you knew how rare it was for him to take some time to see them - but the day before, the 24th, you had him all to your own.

Just "a casual dinner, the two of us" (his words, not yours) with some "classic Christmas movies, deal with it, loser" (your words, not his) at your place.

Going out was a real pain nowadays, with the whole paps, fangirls, Snapchatters, etc thing, so to save yourself from the stress (how come he never failed to look like a Goddamn model on those candids whilst you looked like you were about to sneeze? Ugh.), staying in it was.

In, with no gifts.

Or at least you thought so, because mid afternoon on December 24th your iPhone seemed to gain a life of its own, all your social media accounts on a frenzy of notifications as, oh well, your famous as fuck of a boyfriend was spotted loading a box the size of a small poney into his car.

("She is so lucky!!!!!!")

("What did he get herrrrrrr i'd be happy just with his dick on box and by the size of it its prob that lol")

("Ugh i hope its a bomb")

(Insert other very sweet comments here.)

You controlled the urge to text him (going against your über curious personality with all the strenghth your posessed), instead focusing on the fact that you were...

Fucked.

Because whilst your boyfriend was on the posession of a very big, flashy box (what you had no idea what was inside, Christ, what the hell was inside of it?!), you were in the posession of...

"How The Grinch Stole Christmas", "Elf" and "The Polar Express".

(All masterpieces, in your humble opinion.)

And the phone of the thai take out two blocks from your place.

(Best pad thai and sticky rice ever.)

(Plus it gave tons of free sriracha packets! Yay for free stuff!)

But seriously, what the fuck were you supposed to give to a human being who seemed to have absolutely everything?!

It'd be stupid to give him clothes - he got those for free -, you had no idea what his shoesize was (did that make you a horrible girlfriend? oops) and anything else you could think of was undoubtely lame.

What if you made him something?

Okay so you didn't know how to draw or paint or knit or rhyme or write a song or do anything that required a minimum artistic vein slash handicraft talent but you could...

Try?

Throwing your body on the couch, your laptop literally on your lap, you sat on your ultimate comfy position - which he had lovingly nicknamed "Cirque Du Soleil's contortionist catching up on reality TV on it's free time" or "how you don't have a back problem is beyond me" (when he said that last one he totally reminded you of your mom) -, typing on the words that were responsible for many delayed papers at Uni and scurries off the house whilst almost tripping on your shoes as you were late as fuck.

Pinterest dot com.

(A blessing and a curse to womankind, honestly.)

D. I. Y.

(Do it yourself.)

(Although you actually never did.)

Scrolling down the screen - DIY baking soda shampoo! DIY mosaic tile birdbath using recycled DVD's! DIY Glittery Bath Bombs! - you noticed that all of them seemed to involve stuff everyone apparently had at home except you like glue guns or spray paint or Scrabble tile holders (...seriously) so after five minutes of Pinterest searching, you sighed in defeat.

(Hard effort wasn't your forte, you had to admit.)

Even friendship bracelets are a hard task to accomplish when you have the skills of a three year old toddler and if you actually purchased a glue gun you could already picture yourself glueing nothing but your own fingers and spending Christmas Day at the ER.

But you did have glitter glue, and that wasn't so dangerous was it?

You also had an old, slightly crumpled piece of cardboard and a "DIY Easy Glittery Hallmark card tutorial!" (snort) at your screen, so you decided to give it a go.

If it came out okay you'd be able to give him as an ironic gift?

("Oh hey, I know you gave me a super awesome/expensive/fancy/cool/thoughtful - insert whatever the hell could be inside that massive box here Christ the curiosity was killing you - but ha-ha-ha remember that snark you made about glittery Hallmark cards?! Instead of giving money to the greedy capitalist men I made one myself, how about that?! Aren't I the Best Girlfriend Ever?!?!?!")

And if it came out like crap you could, y'know, throw it in the bin...

...So of course it came out like crap.

Because you somehow managed to put more glitter glue on the tip of your fingers than on the goddamn cardboard, more glitter glue on your clothes as you absentmindedly rubbed your hands on it as you tried to think of what the hell you could do to save your "Merry Christmas" masterpiece.

(Trash.) (That was how you could save it, your dignity, your boyfriend's poor eyes and your dignity.)

(By throwing your masterpiece on the garbish.)

(Fuck ironic gifts.)

Of course that instead of coming up with another idea after the Glittery-DIY-Hallmark-Card fiasco, your procrastinator side spoke louder, and click after click after click you found yourself going deeper and deeper of that pit called Pinterest, until you blazed on a section you'd never dared to venture on before.

The recipe session.

There were gooey chocolate chip bars, chocolate fudge brownies, kale and artichokes dip, quinoa fried "rice" (...why would someone all it fried "rice" if it had no rice in it only quinoa, you wondered...) and everything made your mouth water and stomach growl and you deeply wished there was someone who could make it for you.

Everything sounded too tempting (and too hard and with too many fancy ingredients and kitchen appliances you'd never even heard of) until you found...

"Easy adaptable chocolate chip cookies with ingredients everyone has at home!!!!! Can be made vegan gluten/lactose/nut/anythying free paleo atkins insert random diet you'd never heard of before here"

Well...

Following a recipe wouldn't be that hard... Would it?

Especially when you could sub eggs for oil if you didn't have any or oil for mashed banana or mashed banana for applesauce or applesauce for honey or honey for agave which were all obviously so much alike, right?

Throwing everything you had into a single bowl - did you mention it was a single bowl recipe? Seriously, it could not get any better, your dishes-washing-hater-side thought - you frowned as you compared your final result to the one on the screen.

Pinterest's batter: gooey but firm, looked so good you wouldn't mind spooning it raw directly into your mouth.

Your batter: two year old's diarrhea, you wouldn't want to spoon it raw directly into your mouth not even if they paid you.

You somehow managed to put little (balls, on Pinterest, blobs, sounded more accurate to your situation) blobs of the batter onto the baking sheet and onto the oven, too busy freaking out slash trying to understand what the hell you did wrong (ooh two american cups of flour? what were american cups? weren't your cups american? why america has to control everything for god's sake?!) to notice the door being unlocked, only realising you had company when you heard an amused chuckle behind you.

Turning around so quick you almost broke your neck - fouet filled with sticky disgusting batter held in hand in a threatingly way - you found him staring, all long legs and perfect hair and mocking grin and...

Empty hands?

Where the hell was the box the size of a toddler he was seen loading into his car?!

Goddamit, internet!

(And why did you feel a lil' bit disappointed I mean...)

(...you had him, hadn't you?)

(Best Christmas Gift Ever, am I right.)

"Hi."

"Hi. Were you..." A cute little frown appeared between his brows, pearly white teeth still on show as he asked "Baking?"

Getting a bit defensive - why did he have to sound so confused/terrified? - you dropped the fouet on the sink, replying "Yes, why?"

"Oh, for nothing! I mean, it smells..."

(Awful.)

"Pretty good."

(Damn, he was a liar.)

Leaning to check the oven temperature just one more time - I mean, better safe than sorry, you couldn't push your luck (any further) - you ignored your boyfriend's stare (a cute little smirk on his lips because well, he thought it was cute how you hadn't noticed the chocolate batter on your chin or how you wore an apron thrice your size), asking maybe a little too cheery "So, how's your Christmas eve going so far?"

( "...Loading too many big ass boxes onto your car?", you rhymed mentally.)

"Well, not too good I mean, I only got to see my lovely lady today." He replied with a charming smile, expecting for you to giggle - alright, fine, he knew you weren't one to giggle, or at least give him love eyes.

You squinted skeptically.

...Okay.

"Empty handed, I see."

"Yeah, kinda glad we decided to skip on that Christmas madness. Had to help a mate out with picking up a complete set of one of those fancy Le Creuset cooking things. Said his girlfriend would love it." He added with a scoff, rolling his eyes "I told him that if I gave you anything kitchen related you'd throw it in my head, but seeing you're apparently into cooking now..." He paused, pursing his lips "Should I write it down as a suggestion for your birthday?"

Her mind went black.

Kitchen appliances.

His mate was giving his girlfriend freakin' casseroles and frying pans.

(Oh poor girl.)

(Poor, poor girl.)

(The disappointment when she opened that huge heavy box.)

(Damn.)

And you had been freaking out the entire day thinking he'd gotten you something big and awesome and you'd look like the awful ungrateful girlfriend.

Man, that ugly glittery card would look like heaven next yo, y'know... Nothing.

"If you ever give me a damn casserole pan I shall rip off your little buddy of you, cut it into tiny little pieces, cook them in the freakin' thing and serve you for dinner." You stated, and he replying, giving you a kiss on the forehead "Aw, see? I know you so well."

God, you were glad he didn't get you anything.

Because being with him was the best gift you could've ever asked for.

(Insert vomiting and cringing here.)

(Fuck you never thought you would be THIS gross and disgusting and loving about any human being in your life after your miserable string of awful break-ups.)

(Yet there you were, with your very own prince charming.)

(Yup, that was it, you guys would be watching The Christmas Prince on Netflix.)

You showed your appreciation by getting on the tips of your toes and pecking him on the lips, the little wrinkle of confusion between his forehead making you want to kiss him even more.

(How was possible for someone to be so cute slash sexy at the same damn time?)

(Seriously.)

(Ugh.)

But then, maybe you'd been too distracted by his pouty pink lips - no chapstick or anything, you wondered how the hell he managed to get them always so soft and puffy and kissable - to check the oven...

And the whole room started to smell a bit smokey.

And look a bit smokey.

"Fuck, my Pinterest cookies!" You squealed, startling him.

You were sort of thankful your fire alarm wasn't working so well, because if the firemen showed up because you almost burned your kitchen down, your landlord would have (even more) reasons to hate you.

"It looks... Edible." Your boyfiend said matter of fact, poking one of your cookies at the tray with the tip of his fingers with brows furrowed.

They looked like baby alien fetus.

(Edible, in some outer galaxy cultures, probably.)

"Want to try them?" You knew by the raise of his eyebrow that it was a challenge, a thing you rarely passed.

Daringly, you got one - dropping it back to the tray because damn they were hot -, trying it again after a few seconds of you two staring at each other with "Who Shall Quit First" eyes.

Was he going to make you eat them first?

By the fake tight ass smile he was giving you, he was...

So with the biggest grin you could muster, you squeaked "Merry Christmas baby! I made these for you! Hope you like them!"

(Or at least don't get food poisoning and die! Please don't get food poisoning and die! I kinda really really really really really like you!)

(And if you die because of me slash my cookies your fans will murder me!)

With a small gulp, he picked one of the alien fetus cookies, shaking it off so they wouldn't be "too hot and burn his tongue" for about three minutes.

You kinda knew he was trying to make as many tiny pieces of it fall out so he'd eat as less of a cookie as possible, but you didn't call him out on it because oh well, he was at least going to eat a teeny bit of them.

And in the end, after a bit of fake awing "Oh, tastes so good babe" and maybe spitting on a napkin when you turned around to throw the dirty dishes on the sink, he did eat your alien fetus cookies.

What made him the best boyfriend slash Christmas present ever.

And after drinking maybe a bit too much wine and watching The Christmas Prince, he drunkenly vowed to never ever give you anything cooking related - as the cookies now rested in peace in your trashcan, on top of your ugly ass glittery card -, and that vow would be proved to be a gift that kept on giving.

(I mean, it would give stomach aches and calls to the fire fighters and be a total waste of ingredients, so you were cool with that.)

(And even if he never gave you anything at all, he dealt with your craziness, your PMSing, you overreacting whenever you let your - very expensive - makeup fall onto the floor, never watched Game of Thrones episodes without you and always let you eat the biggest last slice of cheesecake.)

And if that wasn't much of a proof of real, true love, you had no idea of what the hell it could be.

And that was the greatest gift of all.

(Cue to cringing due to cheesyness again.)

-------

MERRY CHRISTMAS U GUYSSSSSSSSS!

Hope y’all have a fantastic one and find all you wanted under the tree! ooh and if you liked it pls don’t forget to click on that like button (i’ve been watching too many youtube vids send help)

lots lots of love

Gabe

ps: i’d like to dedicate this to my favorite humans on earth victoria, nina and lari, who are still my friends even after i’ve been through probably 30 different mental breakdowns this year, love you guise so muchhhhhhhh thanks for always encouraging me to write!!! oh and if you haven’t read my stories based on them you can find them all here

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regularbeans · 7 years ago

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Alright, we sold the house.

This is a post about that house.

Last time I was in that house was on the day of my grandma’s funeral and I remember my mum kept having to go back to pack her stuff and pack out and bring stuff home and she kept having to sleep there because taking the bus there and back on several consecutive days was just a waste of money and I still don’t know how she did it, I couldn’t have.

I said this back when we talked about what would become of that house and I said the house wasn’t the house because of the house, it was the house because of my grandma. And it’s true, it just didn’t feel the same without her but I guess that’s the same with most things that belong together.

I have very old memories of that house. I remember playing there as a really small, tiny kid, with my cousin, my uncle’s son, who for some reason said he’s going to marry me (I don’t think either of us knew what marrying meant, we were like four). I remember the dog, Pepi, the chicken in the back of the yard. I remember these two (then three) neighbour girls I became friends with through the fence, how I kept hanging out with them despite being much older and going over to their place to hang out and they would literally cling onto my waist and I’d carry them around and they were my “holsters”.

For a really long time I had no real idea of just how big the backyard was. It was basically a vineyard and there was this big tree and some junk in the back. I never really played there much, there was this weird bush with some weird fruit on it my mum loves, I think my mum called it gooseberry but I remember small black fruit. Anyway. I stole something when I was in elementary school and I buried it there then I dug it up and broke it with a stone so there would be no evidence left #genius

My grandma was a hairdresser all her life, and she had a salon behind the house. I just picture the door opening and hearing the chatter inside, of old ladies, of the hairdryer, the water flowing in the sink. The smell of hair products, my grandma standing with her hand pressed against her aching back, holding her tools in her other, her hair up in a bun. There were all these old ladies there...

On the mirror was a piece of paper of her prices and I remember I wrote it on our computer in our old house and I remember our ő (or one of the accented letters) was broken at the time (I think I spilled juice on the keyboard) so I left a space where it was supposed to be that letter and she handwrote those. Now I got mad that I don’t remember which letter it was. Maybe á? There was a lot of that latter on there. Now I’m... really angry... I don’t remember. I spent so much time looking at it and I can’t remember.

I loved it when she washed my hair though she was kind of harsh, and it wasn’t very comfortable under my neck but I liked the warmth of the water. I had my hair dyed blonde there in 2012 for the first time, the bleach stung so much. It also took me a long time to find out the salon had a bigger back area with the boiler and so much old crap she horded over the years.

I remember wanting my hair done all the time but not wanting to sit in those chairs for ages. I loved playing with the curlers, put them on my fingers, pretend I had curlers as fingers. There was so much stuff there...

There was a mosquito net door on everything because my grandma was allergic to bees. There was one on the entrance of the house too but there was a square cut in it so we could reach in and unlock this lock... thing... that was on it. The inside door, the real door was barely closed during summers which is when we were there most of the time. I don’t think we ever met my grandma inside the kitchen when we visited her, she always came outside to greet us, that’s where we hugged and kissed, and she would already be cooking something inside, listening to the radio, always the same channel, some old Hungarian thing with classical music and weird religious programmes. I always thought she smelled like a dentist, I don’t know where I got that from, it’s not true.

I was barely in the pantry but there was always so much food there. That’s where I found out you can keep the bread in the fridge. I never liked any of the fruit juices she brought or made. Sorry.

One of the bathrooms opened from the kitchen as well with this huge ass boiler but I remember bathing in that room only once or twice. It was exciting, I don’t know why. The toilet had this flusher that was weird, you had to kind of hold it and wait for a specific noise to let go otherwise it didn’t flush properly.

The kitchen table was close to the door to the living room and a chair always stood in the way, that was usually my place during meals. One time my grandma had this cat, Mici(?), and she kept playing with our feet under the table. My mum hates cats so she didn’t like it but I loved it. When she died my grandma kept luring cats to the yard. She would cuss them out for being so needy but I think she liked having cats to talk to.

The two rooms were otherwise separated by an ENORMOUS ceiling-high tiled stove. My grandma was always very skinny so she got very cold all the time, the air was BOILING HOT during winters.

In the living room where my grandma slept was where the Christmas tree would be set up. The door to the real living room that was this really cold, tiled ~middle room always covered the TV if it was open but when the stove was on she always wanted that door open so the warmth would spread to the whole house. That was the only TV in the house and I remember always wanting to wake up early on the weekends so I could watch the morning cartoons. So often I fell asleep again while watching them. For some reason I remember watching Hungarian talent shows there. And the 2008 Olympics opening ceremony. There weren’t too manny channels on it so we only gathered together there if there was a good movie going otherwise it would just be her and my mum watching telly.

That middle room thing wasn’t exciting. There was a huge dining table there but I remember eating there only once or twice when something fancy happened or when my grandma had guests over? Very rarely. She kept her plants there because it was a cold room but it had a huge window wall so the plants would get a lot of sunlight.

My keyboard was set up there sometimes. God we used to haul my keyboard over there holy shit...

One door from there led to the second toilet that was just a small cubicle with one toilet. For a huge chunk of time it didn’t work properly so if we wanted to go in the middle of the night we had to go through the living room, where my grandma was sleeping, and sneak past her without waking her up, then go potty in the kitchen bathroom. She would close the door then so she could see the TV and that door was NOISY. For the longest time this ashtray stand kept the door slightly ajar but it was made of metal and the ashtray was removable so when you had to move it it required a special set of skills to not make any noise with it, holy shit, I felt like a ninja every time.

When the second toilet got fixed I went there to write my diary in the middle of the night for some reason. There were a LOT of spiders there.

There was a second bathroom there. The stupidest thing but I can’t remember if I liked that bathroom or not. The sink and the mirror were behind the door and the boiler was above the bathtub and I was always so scared it would fall on me. I don’t remember taking baths there I usually showered. There was a colour-changing toothbrush there. And a small space next to the bathroom, I was once playing hide-and-seek with the neighbour girls and I remember crouching there and putting a towel on myself and I pretended to be a pile of clothes, they didn’t actually find me, I shit you not :D

There was this bedroom opening from the ~middle room that we never used. It was a guest room but my grandma usually kept composts there and aspic cause since nobody used that room it didn’t require heating. Fucking aspic addicts both her and my mum. That’s so weird, why would anybody like aspic, it’s jelly soup, ew.

There was another bedroom opening from there, a smaller one with just one bed. That also had a TV now that I think about it. My mum slept there once my sister became too sensitive to her snoring but I also remember sleeping there sometimes. The neighbour girls were always trying to wake me up in the mornings by calling through the window so I would come play with them. It was endearing until I grew up.

The last bedroom was the one where we slept in, quite a big one with one bed and another couch-thing-bed where my sister and I slept. There used to be no divide between them and I could just sprawl across my sister but then my grandma rearranged them (I still don’t know how that worked) and there was this wooden divide between them to my sister’s biggest joy and to my biggest disappointment x) I still found a way though. I think there used to be a telly in there but it either never worked or she took it out of there quickly. I’m positive there used to be a telly there.

A perfect place for the floor is lava ngl.

Then once we had laptops I remember spending so much time there... just hanging out and stuff. I remember getting to know so much music there, and just this feeling of freedom and not having to School and Life. My bag used to go right next to the bed in the corner and it was like my little kingdom, nobody could go there, I did whatever I wanted with my little corner, especially hide chocolate and candy there. We all had our own armchairs and everything had its place, whenever we arrived we’d just automatically settle in, like home. I remember when I once slept in the proper bed, I took my stuffed lion lazy, who has a hand-hole in it for puppet reasons, and I put a bunch of clementines inside her and snuck them inside the bedroom and ate them while pretending to be asleep. I don’t know why but it felt like an important mission.

There was some embroidery of a naked woman in that room, I still don’t know why. Also a very pretty drawing my grandma made of a classy woman and her classy hairdo. She was a really good drawer. Once I had my “better phone” that still wasn’t a smart phone there was this drawing app on it and she could draw well even on that.

Anyway, even though the house is on some small street in the butt outskirts of the town whenever the garbage truck came it was loud as fuck. I loved it, for some reason.

I used to have this habit of praying before falling asleep there. No idea why, I just remember praying there.

Outside the house but still in the yard was a pavement, and in the cement is a handprint that belongs to my uncle when he was a little boy. My grandma made this artificial pond out of a huge basin in her front garden. I was always scared of the frogs that would be there but the lilies were very pretty. Her garden was always very pretty, she slaved away in that garden, it was always beautiful. I remember a peach tree but not much else. I don’t think there was a cherry tree.

Outside on the street, I remember this one winter the road was really slippery and we just kept sliding up and down. I love that street. Whenever we would arrive from a night out we’d look at the sky and my sister would like, take note of all the stars and constellations and we would see the huge floodlights from downtown clubs reaching up to the clouds. They stopped one year, maybe they closed that one specific place that did this, I don’t know.

The walk back home from downtown was Long. Especially with a full belly, sometimes I would get so nauseated. I remember in 2008 when the Olympics happened my sister and my mum narrated my rush back home before I threw up like I was one of the Hungarian swimming champions, it was really cool.

Because everything in town was so far, leaving the house was serious business. Even when we just went to the store (and I usually didn’t, it was my mum and my grandma’s morning routine, the daily pilgrimage to the store) if you left something at home it stayed there. And because it was so far we didn’t leave for anything that was shorter than the walk there and back.

I hated the walk but counting the perpendicular streets was fun. Jánoskert, Petőfi (with the ice cream place, we always stopped for an ice cream on the way there), Gárdonyi (apparently there was a playground there and I remember going there once but maybe I imagined it), Báthori, Dobó, and a long walk to the main street there. There was a bookstore close to the main street and I always imagined I would once buy it and make my own store... I don’t remember what I was going to sell but it was going to be nice.

Then the another smaller street with the cabs... then crossing the train tracks, past the train station... good god...

Luckily there was always a lot of things to do in town. Once we got there this main square with the fountain was full of people and stores and vendors, it was so much fun even though we never bought too much stuff because we weren’t exactly tourists. I would always daydream about having infinite money and buying everything though.

There was this arcade we used to go to when I was little, playing fighting games and riding a jetski, it was really cool. I think we stopped being able to afford it when I got bigger. There was this small cinema too that I was always really excited to go to though it never really had that many movies. It was just the one room, the one building with one movie at a time. It was open air too and right beside the train tracks so from time to time the movie would be drowned out by trains passing by. We watched Mamma Mia there.

I discovered a birthmark behind my ear during that movie and I thought it was cancer.

Don’t ask why I remember that.

There was this place there called Nádas, very popular though slightly out of sight, you had to go behind another store to get there, we Loved going there. I think not one summer passed when we didn’t go there. I always got the same thing, most of the time. When we were smaller there used to be these like, these things you could sit on, put in some coins and you could ride like a unicorn or something. That was the shit. I loved that place... god we spent so much time there.

Going further down the road was where the Wine Week would be organised every year. It was cool when it happened when we were there, it meant MORE VENDORS AND MORE SHIT WE COULDN’T BUY. Also sometimes there would be performers on this huge area to the right of the road.

I don’t remember the last time we got to go to the beach. The weather wasn’t always right, my grandma wasn’t always in the best shape and we didn’t spend that much time there anymore especially after she got difficult. But I loved the beach. There was this huge tree in the middle that most people were aiming for so back in the days we used to set out really early to get a spot there. I don’t quite remember the shore right now... but I remember the slides that I went down on once. We even went to the not-free beach once, I went down the slide there. There was this spinny changing room there. It didn’t have a door it was just a spiral so if you went around enough you were inside and nobody could see in or out. That was fun.

I listened to a lot of music there. Ironically, Nobody’s Listening by Linkin Park comes to mind but... there was a Lot of music there. We ate a LOT of corn too. And ice creams... we tried not to go potty there but sometimes we had to and I hated going cause the floor of the bathrooms were muddy from the wet sand...

We used to watch the August 20th fireworks there. We used to be so close I’d have to duck for fear they would fall on my head. Then we never went that far anymore for fireworks alone and we no longer stayed for one or two weeks.

We used to walk back home then both my grandma and my mum got older so we usually took the cab but most of the cabbies knew my grandma so we got cheaper fares. Once when we walked home my mum and I had to pee so much we actually went in a park. It was dark, don’t worry... I also almost threw up next to the kindergarten. Then my stomach hurt so much my mum thought my appendix burst but it didn’t.

I used to be so sad when we had to leave. It’s a little bitter feeling but once it got difficult to spend more time with my grandma it got easier to leave so maybe it’s lucky that happened so the change isn’t that huge. But it still hurts.

Because we no longer belong there.

I’m going to miss that house.

#mediocre young adult #this post is so long #but its still not enough memories #you know when you call a place your second home for so long and then it stops being that #not good

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cleopatraas · 8 years ago

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A Court of Wings and Chiara (acowar spoilers)

Anonymous asked: I just finished ACOWAR and ugh I kept thinking about Chiara the entire time! Please make a post where you have head canons or something and she's in ACOWAR. I need it, I need to know what she would have done in those scenes.

For everyone who doesn’t know Chiara is my original character. Rhys’s sister, Tamlin’s mate, High lady of the Night Court.

I’ll be honest with you. I literally just finished ACOWAR last night and I forgot what half the book was about. So this...is gonna be rocky.

This turned out to be...super long and I really hope you guys read it even though it’s long. And I will do a cut...only for you guys.

Warning: if there are typos...I will literally jump off a bridge. Because I’m sure even after proof reading, there will be at least one (1) typo that hates me.

The Meeting: aka the Court of Dreamers is reunited.

Feyre and Chiara are best friends, they are sisters. You can pry this from my cold dead hands. They ALMOST went from enemies (because of Tamlin) to friends (this is what they are now) to lovers (but...there’s Rhys) but I’ll be honest. I ship these ladies so much.

But they’re just weeping and crying and clinging to each other and Chiara hisses, “I’ll kill him with my bear hands if he touched you” I have nothing that rhymes except sisters before misters, but basically they’re that™ friendship. and Feyre is like “No, no. It’s fine, it’s fine”

Chiara is the only person who recognizes Lucien’s trauma. She was there. In the Spring Court. I do not™ care about the timeline, these two were friends. And she just...talks to Lucien. And she hears him talk, and talk, and talk. But she doesnt react, tries not to clinch her fists, and then she hugs Lucien and promises him that, “You’re safe here. I’ll protect you with my life. If you want - you are my court now, Lucien. This home, these people, are yours. When you are ready”

Summer Court Attack: aka that time when Tarquin put everyone in their place

Chiara shows up a little late (you’ll know why later), but boy she’s in Illyrian leathers and she’s flying with the Illyrians with Cassian, taking down Hybern’s aerial army. And they’re both working so well together, because you can PRY this from my cold dead hands but they were always super close and Chiara always got him through his kills, especially his first ones.

Chiara can feel Rhys, through that sibling bond, that slimmer of magic they share. She checks on Feyre and Mor, but she knows her besties got this covered, and then she faces that hologram projection of the King of Hybern. And she and Rhys are side to side, the Siblings of the Night Court, Death Incarnates, or whatever other titles Rhys had, and they’re both getting ready to be martyrs (siblings who are idiots together, stay together). But then the projection goes poof and the ship and all those warriors go Mist™

Chiara feels so bad about what they had to do to get the Book and she was genuinely starting to feel something for Tarquin? (Or Varian or Cresseida. I will captain all of these ships). That was in ACOMAF and in that time Chiara was finally...healing. After Tamlin, after Amarantha, and she just...saw something in those bright blue Summer Court eyes. And she had to betray them.

Chiara keeps her Court in check��. There will be no disrespecting Tarquin in his own court. She just lays her hands before him, pleading with her eyes, regret, so much regret, written clear on her face.

“You stole from me”

“I know”

“You could have just asked me”

“Tarquin, I know. But I won’t say sorry, those are useless words. But I am. You don’t have to take the blood rubies off our names, but know that we saved you today. And I would gladly drag more Illyrian solders, I would gladly drag my family out here to do it again. Nothing owed, ever.”

“Get out”

And she’s just?? She doesn’t know what to do. She bows and then takes her Court and goes to check on the wounded. And into the night and all throughout the day, you see one Illyrian female tended to every wounded she can find: both Summer Fae and Illyrian.

Chiara isn’t in a lot of scenes because she’s got BUSINESS to take care of. (and also because I really can not remember a lot rom ACOWAR)

The High Lord Meeting: aka the scenes where all my wigs were snatched and I still haven’t gotten them back

The Court of Dreamers came to slay. No masks, no lies, all wings. Chiara walks in front, but she’s wearing simple trousers and a tunic, everyone else can be fancy. Some earrings, chokers, bracelets and rings here and there too, of course. But at some point in her life she had to stop being a little girl and be a ferocious High Lady. And if everyone else in pants, then so is she.

She has a crown on her head and I’m shaking at the imagery. She has stars in her hair, nightmares in her eyes. She looks behind her, at her Court, and she nods. She gives an extra nod to Nesta (you can pry this friendship out of my cold dead hands. Try it). And then she walks into the room, her wings flaring behind her.

She meets all the High Lords’ eyes and then Mor squeals. I love her friendship with Viviane and Chiara used to be friends with Viviane too....before Amarantha. And she just watches Mor and Viviane and gives a polite smile and then sits down.

Tarquin shows up, like the truest boss he is. Chiara’s heart squeezes. She tries to catch Tarquin’s or Varian’s eye, but they won’t look at her. Beron and the Brood show up, eek.

Everything is going...as well as it can be, UNTIL TAMLIN WALKS IN, IN ALL HIS PETTY GLORY. And that tug, that tug that is so small, so fragile, makes their eyes meet. And Tamlin’s nostrils flare and Chiara grips her chair tightly.

But Chiara is the Bigger Person™ and she gets up and walks over to Tamlin and holds her hand out. Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel are on edge. Mor, too. They’re the only people who know the entire story, of what went down, what went wrong.

Tamlin sneers at her so she sneers back and huffs and goes to sit down on her chair, letting her wings flare. And Tamlin’s eyes roam over them, and something like sadness fills those green orbs.

Then Amarantha comes up in the conversation...and it takes everything for the Bat Brothers to not snap at Tamlin and Beron. But Chiara sits with a removed silence, tilting her head to the side. Titles are flung - “High Lord Killer” which causes Tamlin to cringe, and other titles as well. (Yes. Chiara killed Tamlin’s father, beheaded that fool for killing her mother, then she left his brothers to her brother and father. And Tamlin killed her father. I told y’all their story is ...)

“You call me High Lord Killer, Beron, as if you don’t understand those three words. Would you like me to give you a live demonstration?” Helion snorts. Thesan chokes.

“How did it feel to kill your mate’s father?”

Chiara tilts her head to the side again. “It felt glorious to get revenge for my mother if that’s what you’re asking, Beron, and if not, I would like to get to the topic at hand. Hybern”

But then the Winter Court comes up...(Rhys and Chiara both sacrificed themselves to Amarantha to keep Velaris safe. Rhys did it because he wouldn’t let his baby sister do it alone)

“We stopped her from killing you, Kallias. We had no idea what the costs would be” Chiara falters and her eyes go to Tamlin for a moment, before she looks away. “I thought keeping her busy would distract her. But she sent Rhys instead”

Azriel protec™ but he also ATTAC™ ERIS FOR INSULTING CHIARA.

Chiara protec™ but she also ATTAC™ BERON FOR INSULTING HER AND RHYS.

Skip, skip, boring political stuff, Tamlin being petty, the usual.

Skip!

Helion comes to their room. And Chiara smiles and she hugs him and Feyre is like “Wut?” and Chiara shrugs, patting Helion’s shoulder.

“You two....Chiara please tell me not every High Lord is in love with you” Like Feyre is trying to piece the pieces together and she looks to Mor, Cassian, and Azriel for help and Cassian and Azriel are watching Helion, and mor is just giving small thumbs up and a wink.

“Of course not, silly. Beron is old enough to be a pile of ash by now, and quite frankly, I have better taste than that. And Thesan has better taste than me” She™ Did™ That™. And Feyre snorts and mocks her.

“Have fuuuuuun”

“I will”

Chiara saunters off and Feyre whistles and Mor joins in, clapping and I love girls supporting girls no matter what. I just...I love it.

You could literally drag me away from this friendship, beat me, tie me to a tree, and I would somehow find a way back to it.

Skip, skip, skip.

Skip!

The Second Attack On The Summer Court: aka where I decided to finally disown Tamlin for 2 seconds

Also the moment Chiara decided her fist belonged on Tamlin’s fast. Hard. Fast. Many times. Julian?? Redemption arc?? Idk him. But sure, let’s keep it.

Chiara fights side by side with Tarquin and Varian and I’m literally wiping tears at how precious it was. Varian at her back, Tarquin at her side, they fight together. Shadow and water, blinding and drowning, cutting down enemies. They never falter and finally FINALLY their relationship is repaired and I can ship them in peace. Who? I still don’t know yet...

Chiara flies over to Cassian and she finishes cutting down enemies and Cassian takes down the commander like the TRUE BOSS is his. And it was just amazing and yet again, Chiara tends to the wounded, the High Lady, the High Lord Killer, getting on her knees and healing people who are supposed to be “far below her”

She disappears for a bit and doesn’t appear until the second battle (You will know why)

The Second Battle: aka where everything went down hill so fast my mind was spinning

Anytime Cassian and Chiara fight together I get literal chills. ANY TIME ALL FOUR OF THE SIBLINGS FIGHT TOGETHER I LITERALLY COLLAPSE ON MY KITCHEN FLOOR. Azriel is somewhere behind her, blue light flashing. Cassian is to her left, red light flashing. And Rhys is cutting through soldiers on her right, green light flashing (Rhys isnt High Lord so he has does have all those powers so yes he has seven Siphons and they’re green).

But the line...it starts to crumble. She loses sight of Azriel, then Cassian, and then Rhys. And she doesn’t know which brother to go to first, which person to cut down to get to them faster. And she always has this fear...this fear that she won’t get to them fast enough, like she didn’t get to her mother fast enough. That all she will be able to do is get revenge instead of saving them.

She feels Feyre tug at the bond. And she spins around, looking up at Feyre. I need you. And Chiara shakes her head, she can’t leave her brothers, and Feyre doesn’t need anyone. You got this. Go. Be safe.

(Remind me again why I don’t have them dating?)

CHIARA. SEES. CASSIAN. FALL. She’s fighting and she finally got to Azriel and Mor is with Rhys and all four of them are trying to get to Cassian, but then that stupid commander cuts her brother down. And she screams and a wave of magic finally takes out the Hybern forces.

And she and Azriel are running to Cassian and she lifts him up without a second hesitation and Azriel is right there with her, holding Cassian’s guts in, and she’s sobbing and telling Cassian to stay with her, and Rhys is below them, making sure they’re protected. They’re flying through the sky, Mor winning below them, trying to get their brother to a healer, before it’s too late...

Feyre comes back with Helion, the latter just nodding at Chiara once. Chiara barely sees it, she’s covered in Cassian’s blood, sitting by his side. But she has so many tricks up her sleeve...she needs more sleeves.

The Cauldron, Elain and The Rescue: aka that moment where none of us were scared but we were all low key scared

Nesta locates the Cauldron and Chiara squeezes her shoulder gently, her hand on her lower back. (Remind me again why I don’t have them dating either?) “You did well” and Nesta gives the slightest bit of a small maybe?? And Chiara gives one right back and...great. I swear Chiara is shippable with literally everyone, even that ROCK.

The Cauldron takes Elain or however that happened?? I still don’t understand it, but let me not question it or I’ll drive myself crazy. Chiara insists on joining Feyre. She grabs her shoulders, “You sisters are my sisters, Feyre. We are family. We do not leave one behind, one link could break us all. I’m going with you”

Chiara is in the shadows with Azriel, watching over Feyre in Ianthe™ form. Jurian saves Briar (?? its just unrealistic he didn't save himself) and then they’re on the run. Azriel is carrying Elain, Feyre running behind him, and Chiara is running behind her, trying to keep a shield up.

Chiara pushes Feyre forward and she hisses “Fly” and Feyre shakes her head, gripping onto Chiara. “I won’t leave you, I won’t leave you, I won’t leave you”, but Chiara pulls out a long sword and she shoves Feyre harder. “Fly! That is an order, Feyre Archeron!”

(I swear they’re dating. Rhys who?)

Feyre sobs and Chiara wipes her tears and she pushes her after Azriel. “Go, I’ll give you a lead” And she turns around and cuts a hound in half, staring the King down. Chiara pulls out another long blade, and as the hounds jump on her, and beast slams into them.

YOU MIGHT AS WELL SKIP THIS IS IF YOU DONT SHIP TAMLIN AND CHIARA

Chiara whispers, “Tam” and the beast looks at her, before they go after the hounds together, Chiara cutting them down, Tamlin attacking them, working together, as a team. She looks back and a hound runs past her and she leaves Tamlin and chases it down, but it gets to Azriel and she screams as it shreds his back.

She turns back around and keeps fighting by Tamlin’s side, until she feels the wards break. Tamlin shifts and she grabs his hand and they run, their fingers linking. Chiara tosses her weapons aside 30 steps, 20 steps, 15... 10... 5... and she launches them both into the air, grunting, holding Tamlin against her, flying through the break in the ward.

And she looks down at Tamlin and they share a look, before Tamlin winnows. Chiara catches up with Feyre and Azriel, and Elain and Briar, and she guards their backs, trying to heal Azriel in mid air.

When they get back, Chiara collapses in Rhys’s arms, gasping for breath. “He saved us” And Rhys just strokes her hair, holding his sister as she finally, finally cries for what she lost. But she stops crying, because she knows what she can gain.

THE COURT OF DREAMERS: aka the scene where my emotional dramatic self finally started crying

This is it. The final speech. Chiara has given a lot to her brothers, her cousin, her friend. She has given one or two to Feyre, but none to Elain or Nesta. She sighs and leans against her sword and gives a sad smile.

“I’m glad I met all of you, and I mean that. I truly mean that. I don’t know where I would be without you...likely cowering on my own throne or dead” Chiara smiles and turns to Rhys. “To the first brother I knew, who gave me the world on a silver platter, no questions asked. Who protected me from the world with a silver sword, with maybe a few questions asked” Rhys smiles.

“To my other brothers, who saved me even though they claim I saved them. Who saw butchering and darkness far greater than I can comprehend, who trusted our mom, who grew up with us. Who gave me the strength,” She squeezes their hands “When I needed it”

“To my cousin, my best friend, the light of my eye,” Mor smiles and her hands shake at her sides. “Who made me realize that I was not alone, that I was not the only female fighting. Who made me realize why I was fighting and kept me fighting”

“To my scary, scary tiny firedrake” Amren scowls and Chiara laughs. “Thank you. For simply existing, for simply being curious, for simply allowing me into your life. What an honor it has been”

“To my Feyre,” Feyre grins and she doesn’t even care. She flings her arms around Chiara’s neck and Chiara wraps her arms around her waist. “Who brought the light Under the Mountain. Who taught me...who showed me that it was okay. It was okay to love again and I did. I love you fiercely. Who suffered at the hands of my mate, but still loved me back. Who loves my family, my brothers, and one in particular. Thank you so much, Feyre Archeron, I will never be able to thank you enough” (Why are THEY NOT TOGETHER IM MAD AT MYSELF AT THIS POINT)

And then she turns to Nesta and Elain and holds out her hands. Elain takes her hand and Nesta stares at it, so Chiara just almost lets their fingertips touch. “To my newest sisters, who I haven’t even begun to understand, to know, to love. But the time we’ve had together, I have seen your strengths. I am glad to have you at my side. I have seen your weaknesses and I am glad to protect those with my life”

Chiara looks at the empty space somewhere in the circle. “And to the one I lost - I may have lost you, but I have gained so much more. And I hope you do too” And they all join hands and it turns into a group hug and even Nesta MAYBE joins.

And I swear to God...

THE FINAL BATTLE: aka everything was moving so fast and I’m still trying to figure out what happened

EVERYTHING HAPPENED SO FAST CAN SOMEONE JUST PLEASE TELL ME WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED?

All I know is...Chiara had so many plans up her sleeves and here they are. She was a little late to the battle, but that doesn’t matter, MY GIRL HAD SOME PLANS.

She made a bargain with The Boner Carver, The Weaver, Bryaxis, AND whatever that Book summoned (Remember that? You know...the huge plot hole that was never addressed again? Like...you do realize they probably have beasts and monsters and whatever creatures trying to get to Hybern/Prythian/wherever the Book is bc Feyre put the Book together...but okay)

I don’t know how bargains work, I don’t care, I just know Chiara, High Lady of the Night Court, DID THAT, and now has some amazing tattoos all over her back and arms. Because...that’s how it works right?

But honestly I just love the aesthetic of the shields breaking and then Chiara is standing there, in Illyrian FEMALE armor, her arms up and then the glamors fall and she has all these monsters and?? Like yeah she probably sold her soul for this to happen, but is that the point? No.

She’s just controlling...all of them. Never been done before. Literally never been done before. The true High Lady of the Night Court. She just looks behind her and smiles “Bone appetite” and then disappears and GOD I love her?? So much.

And then she’s back like five seconds later and she’s flying through the skies....with Illyrian females behind her. “Cassian!” She screams for her brother to get up here with her, as she leads the females to war aka what we were all waiting for but never got?? That’s where she’s been. Saving and recruiting these females, training them, being the best person in Prythian history.

And Cassian is just gaping at her and then he grins “Not bad, little sister” And she scowls and leaves Cassian with the Illyrians - male and female, fighting side by side, in the air, as one. And she winnows in next to everyone else, a grin on her fast.

“That a good enough army for you, brother?” And Rhys gives her a small smile and then he’s gone, fighting with the troops on the ground. Chiara makes sure Azriel stays™ because his wings are damaged and she will not have her brother hurt.

“It’s not enough,” Azriel says and Chiara looks at him sideways. “Have ye so little faith in dear ole sister?” She mocks gently, looking down at the battle. She looks at her wrist, as if looking at a watch. “They just need to hold the lines”

The Cauldron goes off?? I don’t know how that happened, but it does. RIP Bone Carver. Forever missed. Chiara tackles Cassian when he flies back to them, because she almost lost him and she sobs, looking back at Nesta. And Nesta gives her a small smile and she nods. And I’m not even remotely sorry when I say that this? Could totally be a ship.

I don’t know what else happened, it was all moving so fast, but Chiara got Miryam and Drakon to come. The ORIGINAL gangster. I love her...with everything I have. She flies into the skies once again, taking Feyre with her, Cassian taking Nesta.

Chiara just greets them and says “You came” and Drakon ruffles her hair gently. “You came banging on our wards” “Wards are so tedious, Drakon. You can thank me later” and everyone is just gaping at her like...what?? when did you do all this?? She did it when everyone was being jealous of everyone and doing god knows what other useless stuff.

She and Cassian command the Seraphim, Peregryms, and Illyrians. Fighting as one, driving back the aerial army. We have the humans and Vassa and Papa Archeron. Chiara leaves Cassian and she fights side by side with the High Lords, side by side with Tarquin and Helion.

THIS WOMAN. THIS HIGH LADY. SHE CAME OUT AND DID ALL THIS.

Chiara ends up by Cassian, Nesta, Feyre, Amren, to hear that terrible plan that almost got Cassian killed? Yes. THAT one. And Chiara begs him not to go and Rhys appears and Chiara is shaking her head and yes, she’s the first High Lady, yes she’s so powerful, but she’s still just a baby sister who needs all her brothers.

And Cassian kisses her cheek gently and pulls her closer, smiling against her hairline. “I love you, Chi. I never got to thank your mother-” Chiara presses her hand against his mouth “Our mother, Cas, and she needed...wanted no thanks from you. She loved you...so much”

And Cassian smiles and moves her hand “Then let this be the way I show her I have protected you” and Rhys and Feyre hold her bask, kicking and screaming, as Cassian takes off with Nesta. (the worst?? most idiotic?? plan?? i have ever witnessed?? but ok)

And then...so much more went down?? And I remember like...a fourth of it. But it was all pretty dramatic and everywhere.

Skip, skip, skip.

Skip!

YOU MIGHT AS WELL NOT READ THIS IS YOU DONT SHIP CHIARA AND FEYRE

Feyre and Amren are at the Cauldron and Chiara is down on the battlefield with Rhys and the other High Lords. And Feyre reaches down their bond, a bond from so long ago, a bargain Chiara gave her when they were Under the Mountain, a bond Chiara offered to take away; a bond Feyre refused to let go, a bond they both found comfort in, found warmth in their coldest times, and Chiara freezes.

And it’s like even from where she is...all the way down there... She looks up and she sees Feyre and Feyre sees her. And that bond, it glows. And they both smile at the same time, a smile of thanks, of gratitude, of love, of kindness, of being loved, and giving the love; of needing each other, of holding each other up when they both wanted to fall, of shared memories and sweet talks, of short walks and long runs, of flying and training - all in that one smile.

And then Chiara shifts into her beast form and Feyre grabs onto the Cauldron and maybe, just maybe, that’s the last time they’ll ever share that smile again, ever feel that bond again.

(At this point...they’re married, right? Like it’s obvious they’re so in love)

More stuff happens...that I can’t remember...Amren is unleashed. Seriously, what was she? Actually, don’t tell me. She was The Devil and anything other than that is a let down.

Hybern loses. We win. No one dies that we care about except the Suriel. Basically what happens.

Rhys’s Death: aka we were all pretending to be shocked or we were all actually shocked that he “died” and came back to life?

Rhys’s death would have been so much more powerful....if Feyre wasn’t the only one who reacted. Everyone else looked like they were watching a squashed bug die. It felt very emotionless to me, but ....

Chiara screams loud enough to break the battle field when she sees her brother lying there, motionless. She looks over at Cassian and Azriel quickly, but she darts to Rhys, pulling his head in her lap. And she just stares at him and her worst fears have come true - she didn't get to save him just like she didn't get to save her mother - she can only get revenge. But...she cant even get that? Because who is she supposed to kill? She killed Tamlin’s father for killing her mother...but does she kill Feyre? The Cauldron?

No. She just sobs over Rhys’s body and straightens his armor and tries to make him look nice, because he would want that. She grips his shoulders and wipes her tears impatiently, gritting her teeth. And there’s this moment...where she’s alone. Rhys, she believes so deeply, that he’s with their mom (and hopefully not their dad). And yes, Cassian and Azriel are her brothers, but she had this bond with Rhys. And she cant...she cant feel it.

So she glares at the High Lords, her eyes red, tears staining her cheeks, “Bring him back.” and it’s not Chiara saying it. It’s the High Lord Killer glaring at them, snarling at them, clutching onto her brother, the one killed by the Cauldron. The one killed by the thing that blessed her. The irony, the tragedy.

“I will kill you if you don’t bring him back” But she takes a deep breath, her hands still shaking, and she’s still falling apart. And Tarquin steps forward, kisses her forehead, and does that whole magic thingy. Then Helion, Kallias, Thesan, then she does it, pressing her hand against Rhys’s chest, whispering into his hair.

“Tamlin,” She breathes. “Where is Tamlin? Where is my mate” And she looks around, still holding onto Rhys. And Tamlin steps through the crowd and she stares up at him, and its deja vu. She’s crying over Rhys, as she cried over her mother. And he’s just staring at her...doing nothing.

And maybe Tamlin sees that. And he gets down beside her, kisses her forehead and whispers, “I’m sorry. Forgive me, for all of this, for everything and more” And Chiara sobs into his shoulder and she watches as his magic sinks into Rhys’s chest.

YOU MIGHT AS WELL SKIP THIS IF YOU DONT SHIP TAMLIN AND CHIARA

Tamlin holds her against him and she’s sobbing into his chest, gripping onto his shirt. And he’s stroking her hair, looking at Rhys. And then that bond...that bond between them. Maybe it finally has the means to get stronger now, maybe it doesn’t. But it’s still there, and they will always have hope.

And Rhys opens his eyes and reaches for Chiara’s hand, whispering “I saw her,” and Chiara screams and pounces on him and even Cassian and Azriel pull him into a group hug and he just whispers, “She’s so proud of us” And he’s talking about their mom and I am SO DONE breaking my own heart.

“You saw mom?” Cassian’s voice breaks and it turns out IM NOT DONE BREAKING MY OWN HEART because Rhys has one arm wrapped around Azriel, the other wrapped around Cassian and Chiara and he nods, smiling. And Azriel has tears running down his face and Chiara she asks... “Did you tell her I was sorry”

And Rhys says, “There was no need to”

The Meeting: aka everyone in the same room so who dies first? surprisingly no one. but we’re all very cranky.

Chiara tackles Lucien in one of the biggest, cutest bear hugs there is. And Lucien spins her around and she laughs, burying her face in his neck. He’s wearing Illyrian leathers and Chiara squeezes harder and Lucien whispers, “My High Lady” and Lucien is a part of her court now and Chiara smiles and kisses his cheeks.

Blah blah, politics talking, I was half asleep reading this scene, to be quite frankly honest.

But then there’s this scene, it’s just the Bat Siblings and Tamlin left in the room and Chiara stares at Tamlin. And he stares back and swallows. “Could we have been happy? If I fought that day, fought at all?” And Chiara lets loose a breath and she gives a pathetic shrug.

“We can’t know. Something else may have come along, Amarantha was another barrier between us, Tamlin”

“If I hadn’t tried to break the bond-”

And Chiara shakes her head and she walks forward, hugging him slowly, kissing his cheek. They both shudder and she breathes in his scent. “I don’t want to focus on the should have, could have, would haves with you. We either work or we don’t. We either start trying now or we don’t.”

She brushes his cheek and kisses his brow “Tell me your decision later” and she walks out and the Bat Brothers follow her.

Chapter 81: Aka Rhys’s POV and how the book should have ended but didn’t.

Rhys is standing out in the garden and Cassian, Azriel, and Chiara go to him. The latter with a drink for him and Rhys takes it. They all stare at Elain’s garden and Chiara sits down, looking up at her brothers.

And they just all share these smiles and Chiara laughs softly, downing her drink. “No more wars for at least another five hundred years. Or more. Please” And Cassian agrees and he lounges in the sun with his sister and Chiara smiles and plants her head on his shoulder, holding his hand. Azriel sits beside her and Rhys sprawls out by their feet and they all share jokes and they laugh. They have a family, yes, they have their Court, yes, but they also just have them, the four of them, siblings no matter what.

Feyre, Elain, Nesta, Mor, and Amren join them later and Chiara looks at her Court of Dreamers.

And she looks to the skies, to the stars that haven’t come out yet, but have definitely answered, and she whispers “Thank you”

THIS WAS SO LONG I LITERALLY SPENT HOURSE ON THIS. And I know it’s not going to get any notes and I’m cringing at the very thought, but I worked so hard on this and I might as well share it. So lease, just please, leave comments.

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