#aboulia

[straynoahide]

the feanorian fire's died out

I am so extremely fond of the idea that at some point time passes so fleetingly and fast and has no meaning whatsoever for maglor anymore (after everyone has died/left him) that he can lay or sit somewhere for years and years without moving and plants and stuff just grow over and around him

[bentribs]

Aboulia

[nitroglycerin-a]

Tutto a posto signori 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

[dwestfieldblog]

ABOULIA

So, God save the King eh? At 100 million pounds, his cosplay bash was well worth the moolah…indeed, my bosom swelled with pride to read that Take That, Lionel Richie and two of the Muppets were there to aid the celebrations. Nothing but the best for GB. A few houses around here still have massive British flags hanging down from 2nd floor windows, one has a long string of pennants attached down to a broken wall. Nice metaphor. Those against the monarchy were arrested outside the coronation whether or not they had padlocks, rape alarms and superglue with which to protest. Peaceful protest in a democracy? Stay at home and rant quietly lest thy neighbours report thee. Had a chat with a woman up the street about Brexit and patriotism…who said; ‘The Scottish are Scots, the Welsh are Welsh, the Irish are Irish but the English are British’.

Imagine this mentality multiplied on similar themes all over the world, and we get the current Russian war, Sudan, racists, Arab wars, Trump fans, Chinese ‘communists’, fundamentalists etc, etc. THIS group, OUR group are the most important, enslave the others and if they disagree with such inhuman bondage, punish until pliant or just kill them. Behold, the Elite have become as Gods. Robert Anton Wilson said that he had always taken the viewpoint that sure there was an elite running the world…and it was him and his friends. A more optimystic viewpoint to have, good humour is better for the immune system than hatred, says Dave, arf arf.

Very glad to see Finland join NATO in April, Turkey and Hungary continue to hum and haa over Sweden assession as the former are moaning about Kurds and the latter because of the suspension of EU funds, cancelled due to its dodgy practices…Orban is not really a big fan of democracy…the Trump of Eastern Europe, still trying to stay mates with Vlad. As is Erdogan. Massive human rights violations under him ensured Turkey won’t be getting into the Good Guys club (arf) of the EU anytime soon. However, they are both in NATO (Turkey has the second largest army) and should know far better than to kow tow to Putin on any level. Let’s hope the May 14th election will up seat Racip Tayyip. Get him out, peacefully but surely.

An American parent complained that a school history trip featuring Michelangelo’s statue of David was ‘pornographic’ and suddenly the principal is sacked. One parent. Of a 12-year-old. A modest, circumcised stone penis and testicles is offensive? Must have been a ‘christian’. The western world 2023; Art is pornography now. And Kali bless the NRA. People should be aggressively tested for intelligence before they are allowed to have children. Especially in America. How do these ‘adults’ function on this planet? What next, Mona Lisa veiled because of the curve of her breast and suggestive smile? The masses are dumb partly because they pander to the minority of the dumber.

Apparently, the international arrest warrants for Putin and Maria Belova (Children’s Rights Commissioner (sic) for Baldhead) are ‘outrageous and unacceptable’. Invasion, murder and mass kidnap deportations of children for reprogramming are not decent legal reasons? Ok. Foully rotten to see the two Ruscist slapheads Prigozhin and mad Vlad dick measuring over ammunition and dead bodies. And today, the glorious May Day Victory parade in Moscow featured one tank. Not quite Beijing or Pyongyang standards. ‘The world is at a turning point’ said Vlad, still ranting about the ‘nazis’ in Ukraine. That would be the nazis who democratically elected a Jewish actor as their president. Seems likely huh? And again with ‘the West wants to destroy Russia’ rhetoric. No they don’t Vlad, just you and your band of criminals. You are not Russia.

Xi Jinping in Moscow, still slyly giving tacit and very complicit support for the War as they don’t much approve of areas seeking to remain independent of big brother. (Witness also, their keen support for the mass murdering Myanmar junta) Winnie the Pooh, leader for life just like Putin. Tik Tok/tick tock you bastards. At least Xi seems to have chosen his successor…Surely Mad Vlad is not loopy enough to think the appallingly insane Medvedev could take over? Lock them all together in a bunker with one pistol.

Meanwhile the West must utterly excrete (I said excrete not execute) Trump and Boris. Might just be possible (please Shiva) but unlikely the East will ever get shot of (I said shot of not shoot) Putin and Pooh. As said before in other formats by my hand, the West might be decadent liars and killers but those in the East make us look like clones of the Dalai Lama. How will the world ever move forward into love, peace and net zero? AI has the solution…remove the need for any humanity whatsoever. Or improve and evolve them. Now there’s an idea, quick, trap it, regulate it, drive it underground to build in supressed power…

Boris Johnson swore to tell the whole truth about Partygate but did he FK? He needs to be swamped with lawsuit after lawsuit just like his brother in harm Trump. The perfect empty reality tv stars of the West with Megan Markle as their Victim Queen. Risible Sunak goes to school giving a lecture about the importance of Maths, failing to appreciate the bitter irony of his mis handling of his previous job and the billions lost due to foul pandemic deals, cronies and Brexit. And his own extended family getting business deals via policy….

Conservatives Thatcher and Major led the country for 18 years and the government was a brown shower of corruption by its end, leading to a landslide victory by Tony Blair which kept the Labour party in power (don’t count Gordon Brown) for 13 years, also ending in scandal and corruption. This current gang of criminals and morons of the Tory party have now been in power for 13 years. And this country has been irrevocably ruined by them. (Opinion based on stats and business reports.) There is no possible way Labour can shore up the finances, employment, and health care system of this country in a term or two unless some type of V for Vendetta type crackdown (but this time for real) is enforced. So we will be treated to the sight of bullshitter Boris et al ridiculing the new Government as they wade through a swamp of sewage which they will inherit. Much the same way as the Republicans did when Obama took over the massive deficit they had created and for which they then blamed him.

The holy DAO…a decentralised autonomous organisation free of governmental control and hierarchies, sounds good? As usual, depends on the character of the humans involved. Hierarchies always develop according to variations on the food chain and even an equally skilled pack (animal or man) working as a team will allow pragmatic nature to select a top dog. The round table still reserved the biggest chair for the king. Use nationalism, religion, fear, a cocktail of all three. Never fails. Never will. Kill for your country, protect your family and uphold the common values. (But Sir, what if the common values are based on wilful ignorance due to obviously selectively released information and encouraged prejudice? Questions a timid voice from the back of the class.)

Politicians are advised of underling psychology and act accordingly.  The constant daily manipulation of the millions who are seemingly unable to think for themselves, apparently prefer the clearly corrupt to control their reactions for them. Stir the mass, wind them up and watch them go, basing reactions on whipped up emotion rather than actual facts. Country after country, group after group. Still blaming the Bignoses (or, if you are Russian, the Bignoses AND the Nazis, not quite yet understanding their own current actions and words are in no way dissimilar to Nazis.) What are all these poor little racist didums going to do when Soros departs for higher planes? The good Christians will have to get louder about Bill Gates or the dodgy android Zuckerberg. Or Elon…

(Musk says Artificial intelligence is a dangerous thing, while buying into it. ‘Civilisation destruction’ a strong possibility he said, while buying into it. After all, who wants to be left behind in the race to destroy humanity and make money? Loved the beautiful press release from Elon’s people that his spaceship Starship (arf) experienced a ‘rapid unscheduled disassembly before stage separation’. I will call my next mental breakdown that. Unless he has copywritten it already.)

‘If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don’t have to worry about the answers’ Thomas Pynchon Gravity’s Rainbow. The West and East will never stop their chosen methods of manipulation, why should they when they work so well? Millions’ noisy addictive focused attention on the dreams of fake lives in fame and glamour and millions more afraid of the totalitarian knock on the door. Almost all avoiding the question of ‘Who are these whorepigs governing us? ‘And ‘Can any among us truly rule fairly when man lacks consistent self-control?’. The instinct to survive turns into greed, More ! is never satisfied, so faster and faster swirling into the void of absolute entropy upon which leaders have tried to enforce control, but have failed (and will continue to do so) because they have spent centuries hollowing the centre.

‘Democracy is indispensable to socialism’. Lenin, hmmm, he also said: ‘It is true that liberty is precious; so precious that it must be rationed’. Easy to say when your boss has all the gulags. ‘A lie told often enough becomes the truth’, and don’t the leaders on all sides just believe that as an immutable fact? Whereas when one repeats a provable fact, it maintains its structural integrity in the face of unbelieving ridicule That said, even E=MC squared is only a pixel in the cosmic landscape. It is the thoughts of ‘God’ which are the sub atomic particles transforming to waves, once observed by the individual which flow through mirrors of ‘neural pathways’ in all dimensions.

This is me sober, just on Alta Rica coffee in the afternoon, listening to The Stargazers Assistant, Mirrors and Tides, Shivers and Voids on headphones. With a crunchy red apple, just before a colossal rain storm. And a day later with Popol Vuh’s  beauty on speakers, trying hard to avoid the crushing aboulia which is now constantly at the door of the heart. Dopamine circuits malfunctioning. When my respect for someone ends, they are Done, never been afraid to cull dead weight and now…it has come round to me. Like best friends, I have given myself many extra undeserved chances but now as Leonard said ‘the evidence accumulates’ and has become overwhelming…Need to do a couple more decent things with a new Will once the overlong and criminal process of inheritance tax is over months from now and then let go.

A lady up my road lost her husband last month to rapid onset dementia; I had met him some weeks before and had a fine thirty-minute conversation on many topics.  He had been a gunner in bombers in the second world war and adored music, but during his last two weeks when his wife brought him tapes to the hospital of Mozart et al, he ordered her ‘Turn that noise off’. I had always thought that however ill I would get in the future, as long as I could hear music, there would be still be joy in life. Never occurred to me how the brain can change its mind so definitively about what was Loved. 

Shivered.

‘I dream of a government that resembles jury service’. Jaz. Damn right. People who want to serve and improve/evolve society. A group only in temporary power for a fixed length of time before being replaced by similar albeit individual minds. Not years of lying greedy scumbags changing laws to suit their needs and handing out contracts to their mates before checking they can actually deliver. The flaws in this idea remain large and revolve around finding humans who are actually steadfast but flexible, rationally intuitive, good hearted without being wishy washy and strong enough to remain incorruptible by vested interests. Hmm, seems verrry likely. So, just allow nuclear war by arseholes or AI to breed humans the right way. A Matrix Terminator future. Or?

Happy springtime rising into summer, stay healthy, be free, realise in glimpses.

[the-therapist-is-ace]

Oooooh boy this!

I don't count the number of people that are SURPRISED when a therapist congratulate them. On any progress they've made really; but you mostly see that in those with low self-esteem (oh geez, I wonder where THAT comes from... -_-) and ESPECIALLY in those suffering from a major depressive episode.

An example of how a session could go -for a person suffering from depression-:

"So, any progress made this week/month/since we last saw each other?"

"Oh uh... I got up and took a shower today. Got my hairs washed too."

"That's amazing!"

*Patient looks at us in pure confusion and disbelief*

"Uh..."

"No really! It is. When was the last time you took a shower AND did your hairs?"

"*insert period of time more or less long*"

"See? You're doing progress! It's amazing. You're doing great, even if you don't think so."

"You're exagerating."

"No I'm not. Aboulia is one tough adversary in your fight against depression. It's that heavy feeling of not having any energy to do anything. You don't want to get out of bed with that thing on your back."

*Patient reflect on that statement and nod* "It's true that I felt like not wanting to do anything..."

"But you punched it in the chin today. You knocked it out, even if it's temporary. It's still a victory! Kick it while it's down! You're doing great."

The next session happens and oh! Would you look at that! They got the courage to partially do the dishes. Even if it's only one plate and one fork and a knife. It's improvement.

So you encourage them some more!

Next time you see them, they smile and admit sheepishly that they work up the courage to do the rest of the dishes. Amazing! They're kicking that depression's ass. You keep going. You keep encouraging them, telling them that they're doing amazingly, because they are. They are making constant efforts.

Sometimes in the near future they might tell you they got out. They might tell you that they did their laundry. They might tell that they went grocery shopping. Make themselves a real meal instead of takeout.

You continue to encourage them, because even if it's a struggle, or sometimes there's some step backs, it's an accomplishement. It's something that deserve praise. It's a constant battle against an awful enemy, that sometimes even with the help of medication we can't beat.

And who knows! Maybe in the future, near or not, they might see you to confirm that they beat that damn depression. They've done it, they beat that damn adversary, they have their life back!

But do you think they would have done it if people only told them to "just get out of bed" or "pull yourself together"? Do you think they would have find that strenght if the only thing the others would give them is a cold shoulder?

I think I went a bit off topic here, but my point is: everyone need praise. Especially teenagers, or people suffering from illnesses -mental or physical- Everyone need, and deserve praise for their achievements, no matter how small you might think they are.

While I'm at it: whoever read this: keep going, you're doing great ^^ You deserve positive feedbacks!

consider: teenagers aren’t apathetic about everything they’re just used to you shitting all over whatever they show excitement about

[my-wordbook]

Aboulia

1. Loss of willpower

[wedded2wisdom]

[the-therapist-is-ace]

As a psychology student I totally agree! LISTEN TO CHILDREN DAMN IT. But also, as a reaction to OP's story: YO WTF- (psychology rant in coming-)

The minimum needed to legally diagnosed a bipolar disorder is SIX MONTHS after the appearance of the first symptoms! AND THERE'S NO MINIMUM AGE GUYS.

OP I don't know what kind of therapist you saw, but anyone in that field know that there is a maximum age to which you can diagnose a disorder (which is bullshit in its own right and provoke all sorts of problems with patients coming to talk about their symptoms "too late" but moving on) but NO age minimum.

Yes putting a diagnosis of a bit bad scary mental illness can make some adults uneased but the therapists are not supposed to be in that demographic damn it.

Also! I'm adding a pretty big symptom in the depressive part: if a child tells you that they're constantly tired, and that they don't have the strenght to get out of bed. This is called aboulia, and it's the biggest symptom of depresion that I don't see a lot of people talking about.

And again: listen to the children for f- sake, they're the most vulnerables people that can get those kind of things and the ones not taken into account.

There's this idea, fairly common in society, that mental illness is for teens and up. Children are happy little creatures, generally, right? Sometimes they're abused and the trauma can make them mentally ill, but that's not common.

There are two fundamental problems with this attitude. One, it's incorrect to assume that trauma is the only reason a young kid can be mentally ill. Two, trauma is more common than people think. I'll be covering the first problem in this post through the lens of my particular experience.

Where I live, you can be diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 18 years old. You cannot be diagnosed with bipolar disorder as a minor. This poses a problem because my age of onset was in first grade, roughly six years old. Because of the fact that I was very young and new to the world, this was also the age of my first suicide attempt. Thinking I wouldn't be able to pass a spelling test genuinely felt like something worth trying to die over. So, I ate some hemlock, since I'd read about Socrates being killed with it. Luckily, I ate western hemlock, an unrelated species, and just felt kind of sick.

I'm not recounting that for fun or pity. I'm recounting it because children with mental illness are in genuine danger because they have little to no experience with managing their emotions, have little to no concept of the idea that their life can change and improve, and are dismissed by adults. I told a teacher that the test made me want to die, though not that I'd attempted to, and it was brushed off as little kid hyperbole. If I had used a method that was effective rather than one I thought would be, I would have been dead at six years old.

I would not receive medication that worked even a bit for another two years. I would not receive treatment for bipolar disorder specifically for ten years, and that required my PCP fudging the reason for the medication because she was afraid I would die if she didn't, and diagnosis was still two years off at minimum. I received a formal diagnosis at age 19, thirteen years after onset.

But surely that's uncommon, right? This story is a huge edge case, right? I actually have no idea, because age of onset and age of diagnosis are massively conflated for most disabilities. Policies like the one in my area that restricted bipolar diagnoses by age can artificially raise the age of "onset", in my case by thirteen years. The general idea that children are somehow immune to mental illness can also delay diagnosis by several years, perpetuating the idea that young children can't be mentally ill. The data on when people start experiencing mental illness is inherently skewed upwards, and I frankly don't have a good estimate on how bad that skew is. If anyone does have that data, please chime in.

Listen to children. If they're saying they're sad all the time, that they don't care about anything, that they don't see a future for themselves, those are signs of depressive symptoms. If they say that tests make them feel sick, that they can't do anything because they're scared, that they can't breathe and freeze up, those are signs of anxious symptoms. Many children talk about imaginary things, and that's just fine, but slip in a question or two about them to make sure that the kid is just playing, and not experiencing psychosis.

Children are new to the world and vulnerable, and they don't know what's normal and what isn't. They need people who are more experienced watching out for problems they might be having, and listening when they talk about having problems. If you can, try to be the person who perceives them, and tells them that things can be better.

[giographixnola]

Only 5 easy steps!

[weird-word-of-the-day-blog]

Abulia

Noun Definition: an absence of willpower or an inability to act decisively, as a symptom of mental illness. Origin: mid 19th century, coined from 'a' without + Greek 'boulē' the will Pronunciation: ə'boōlēə Can also be spelled aboulia

[lavender-town-radio]

Avolition often coincides with similar symptoms. These include:

Aboulia is the inability to make decisions or set goals. It’s a lack of will, rather than a lack of motivation. It’s considered a more severe form of apathy.

Alogia is the inability to speak.

Anhedonia is the inability to experience pleasure, which can lead to a lack of motivation.

Asociality is a disinterest in being social

Cool. Cool cool love this

A positive association has been found for sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, bullying, or neglect,

BRUH IM THIS WHOLE LIST COME THE FUCK ON

[roastedpie111]

want to hear a a silly word? no? too bad.

aboulia.

whats it mean? well look at you caring now, well it’s what you are!

[misseuropadiscodancer]

Tired of living

Tired of trying

Tired of fighting

Of shouting and crying

I envy the dying

[fishymom-art]

JDS Workers/Metal & Ink

Ok, I don’t think that it interests anyone, but I wanted to write my headcanons for pronounces/sexualities/etc. for JDS workers in Metal & Ink. So yeah. Bear with me for a minute. Joey Drew/Datura- he/them | gay, homoromantic | bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, amnesia

Henry Stein/Anemone- he/him | bisexual, biromantic | symptoms of depression, insomnia

Susie Campbell/Susie Angel- she/her | asexual, heteroromantic | split personality

Metal Bendy- they/them | asexual, aromantic | passive-aggressive personality disorder

Nelly Stein- she/her | thankfully nothing

Sammy Lawrence- he/him | bisexual, biromantic | touch-starving

Wally Franks- ftm, he/him | asexual, panromantic | healthy (thanks, God)

Grant Cohen- he/him | asexual, homoromantic | depression, alcoholism

Norman Polk- he/them | straight, heteroromantic | social anxiety, stuttering 

Allison Pendle/Allison Angel- she/her | straight, heteroromantic | aphantasia, aboulia

Thomas Connor- he/him | straight, heteroromantic | healthy (thanks, gOD)

Lacie Benton- she/them | asexual, aromantic | Alexithymia

Bertrum Piedmont- he/him | asexual, biromantic | narcissism

Jack Fain- he/him | gay, homoromantic | depression, liar

Shawn Flynn- he/them | gay, homoromantic | healthy (THANKS, GOD)

Dr. Hackenbush- they/them | asexual, aromantic | passive-aggressive personality disorder

Audrey Stein- she/her | lesbian, homoromantic | healthy (tHaNkS, gOd)

Martha ???- she/her | lesbian, homoromantic | healthy (t h a n k s, g o d)

[sysmedsaresexist]

Tumblr is giving me some major issues getting this into draft, so guess what, you get what I have, and I might be back later to add more and clean it up, depending on whether you’re going to continue to be difficult about this.

Okay, so, since you can't be assed to do the work yourself, here

“I Am Not I”: The Neuroscience of Dissociative Identity Disorder

History of Trauma and Dissociation

From Understanding and Treating DID: A relational approach

Remember, part of the problem is that most of Freud's work is in German, and Janet's work is in French

You have a VERY bad habit of focusing in on really weird points that confuse the entire conversation.

Yes, in the 1800s, endogenous psychosis/neurosis included symptoms that would later be classified as hysteria, and then MPD, and finally DID, because those other things didn't fucking exist in the 1800s.

That's why I told you to LOOK THEM UP and see how they got from that point to endogenic DID.

You questioned search terms, I gave you some to use.

But you didn't do that, soooo, good job? You look like an ass?

Endogenesis can be traced all the way back to the ancient Greeks and Romans, referring to inner factors that influenced both physical and mental illness.

Again, you want to look up people like Galen (a Greek/Roman philosopher and physician) and Kraepelin to see good stuff about the topic (especially Kraepelin).

Janet really picked it up in terms of dissociation, but Janet and Freud went in opposite directions, where Freud believed it was basically all related to sex and repression.

This is why I also said, preferably you’ll have access to a better library. I can’t find open access articles like this one for people to read. This paper is pretty good at covering the history of the term, though?

“Kraepelin regarded as strictly exogenous the first seven classes out of the total seventeen (madness/insanity of the wounds of the brain, insanity due to illnesses of the brain, intoxications, infectious insanity, syphilitic weakening/loss of energy, Dementia paralytica, senile and pre-senile insanity). The last seven categories were strictly endogenous-constitutional (manic depressive insanity, psychogenic illnesses, hysteria, paranoia, constitutional pathological states, psychopathic personalities, arrested psychical development). The group of three classes in between is constituted by psychoses with obscure though probably auto-toxic causes.“

and

“During the same period, authors such as Freud and Janet raised questions about the goal of the psychical reaction. Freud introduced the concept of repression, which, according to Bercherie (2004), he regarded as being ‘something in excess’ originating from the unconscious. In contrast, Janet, though conceding that the symptom is unconscious, focused more on variants of ‘something less’, such as distractibility, aboulia, shrinkage of the consciousness field, suggestibility, personality dissociation, etc. As we will see later, Kretschmer raised similar questions with his notions of ‘inhibition’ and ‘suppression’. However, Freud’s work with the repression concept (as we have seen in the first part of this paper, partly inspired by Herbart and Griesinger) laid down the conditions for an entirely different concept of the psychical apparatus. This introduced new ideas to the edifice of psychogenesis, such as fantasy.”

Go do your own work and stop spreading shit just because you’re too lazy to actually look stuff up for yourself.

Endogenic was always used to refer to mental illness as something negative and unfixable. Major players in the field expanded on that concept to develop things like the fantasy theory.

Just suck it up and admit it was a bad choice for a term.

It has other meanings, yes, but in the context of systems-- DID/MPD, etc, it has been and will always be negative, so the idea of non-trauma based systems using it is not, and never will be, okay.

Like Lunastusco keeps saying, there are other terms to use, this one has an important meaning and history already.

Extra reading to find/add: https://www.academia.edu/89372590/Reading_Freud_s_Three_Essays_on_the_Theory_of_Sexuality?f_ri=244

"under the category of endogenic pathologies, Freud proposes..."

and (massive PDF, don't open on phone)

and (another big PDF)

Also this

"Freud distinguishes between an external, etiological agent, which...."

Okay, guys! SAS really wants me to talk about the origin of "Endogenic" in relation to systems...

So let's go!

Endogenic System was coined by @thelunastusco in 2014.

There. Done.

I'm glad we all did that!

Oh, wait! They wanted me to talk about this claim!

Yeah... so... I can't find any evidence that Freud actually used that word in this way...

What's being cited here is a book called "The Trinity of Trauma: Ignorance, Fragility, and Control: The Evolving Concept of Trauma / The Concept and Facts of Dissociation in Trauma"

The author uses the word endogenic or refers to endogenesis of various disorders 21 times in this book according to Google.

This is, so far as I can tell, the author's own phrasing. Not Freud's.

And the book was published in 2015, a year after the term endogenic had already been in used by the plural community.

Actually, even framing "hysterical neurosis" as the first diagnosis of multiple personalities is a bit misleading.

Hysterical neurosis was a VERY broad diagnosis that in turn had a dissociative subtype that in turn included multiple personalities as one possible symptom. So even if this could be traced back to Freud, it wouldn't be explicitly about DID, in the same way we shouldn't treat every single mention of Schizophrenia from this period as being about autism. (Since ASD was considered a subtype of Schizophrenia at the time.)

But that's really beside the point. There's just no evidence that I've been able to find where Freud reffered to this as being. I'll admit, I could be putting in the wrong search terms. And it's hard to sort through a century of academic papers. But as it stands, I haven't found a source showing "endogenic" being used to refer to the fantasy model before this book in 2015. And if it was, it's at least uncommon enough that you wouldn't find it unless you're explicitly looking for any usage of the word that could make for a solid smear campaign.

Which really is what this is.

Just like how anti-endos claimed "natural multiplicity" was ableist and suggested traumagenic systems were "unnatural," when any good faith reading would suggest that it was intended in a nature/nurture context: Having a natural cause, as opposed to an environmental one. (Although I will admit the term did get muddled and start to lose meaning once it started including supernatural multiplicity and created systems.)

Or how anti-endos have said tulpas and thoughtforms are appropriative despite Tibetan Buddhists generally not caring.

Or, conversely, how they try to make trans systems calling them "sysmeds" out to be transphobic.

Ultimately, these are not good faith criticisms, and never have been.

Whatever term is used, anti-endos will always look for whatever they can to delegitimize us and spread hate.

[dclevinson]

4/28/20: dictionary time

        For a Cindy medical dictionary: the letter A

aboulia: an absence of willpower or an inability to act decisively. an MGH ICU social worker introduced me to this term about eight months after her bleed, explaining one perplexing aspect of her behavior. Basically, it’s a lack of motivation. Is it connected to her tendency to use “perhaps” or “maybe” as “yes” to this day? Way more things are closer to normal now, but she’s still unlikely to show initiative or suggest an activity ---though she shows no inhibition when it comes to rejecting my proposals.

apraxia: inability to perform particular purposive actions. Is it aboulia or apraxia when I’m assessing lack of a response? This question carries back to the early recovery days when we were trying to figure out if she couldn’t do something or didn’t want to do it. It accounts for a narrower range of behavior now, most often in a lag between intention to do something and starting to do it.

allodynia: feeling pain from stimuli that doesn’t normally cause pain. Luckily she’s experienced this only sporadically. It’s not unusual with brain injuries. The first few episodes were alarming. For a while this winter, if C fell back asleep late morning or early afternoon and slept for over an hour, she could be hard to rouse and might wake with extreme tactile sensitivity. If I touched her leg, she’d react as if in real physical pain. I worry about a recurrence, but at least I know (most likely) what is happening now.

agnosia: inability to interpret sensations, and hence to recognize things. This has taken several forms. Sometimes she visually mis-perceives objects, but the most baffling/frustrating manifestation for her has been the persistent, unsettling conviction that our house is not our house. All the things in our house may be there, but that’s not going to change her mind.