#Why does it have no r but sound like that
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sevika lowkey wants to wife you up (nsfw, strap (r! receiving), biting, also really sweet, mama being mama 🤷🏾♀️)
sevika’s been coming to the brothel just to see you for the last six months, coming to see you like every 3 days and you two spend an amazing time together. it’s not always sex either; it started off that way but you guys really connected.
sevika’s been wanting to ask you to quit your job and let her take care of you but she hasn’t asked yet. you’ve been talking about quitting your job because your hearts just not in it anymore and its effecting your mood.
when sevika finally comes visit you after almost a whole week of not seeing you, she’s ready to finally ask you.
she waits patiently for you to come into the room that you two frequent the most, she watches as you face lights up at seeing her she stands as you approach her with a grin and your arms open, “sev!” you jump into her arms and she holds you tight. “hey princess,” she places you down on the bed, kneeling inbetween your legs as you look down at her with a softer smile.
“why haven’t you come see me?” you ask quietly, running your fingers through her hair. “i was busy,” she says plucking your shoes off your feet. “ya missed me?” she smirks up at you leaning closer to your face.
“i thought you weren’t coming back…” you gaze into her eyes then at her lips. sevika doesn’t respond right away, she sees how much you believed that and she just can’t have that. she leans in to kiss you, pushing you to lay down. she straddles your waist pulling her cape off while your hands cup her face. you moan feeling the weight of her on you, she pulls away from you. “let’s take this off baby,” she pulls at your flimsy dress and you sit up so she can pull it over your head.
still straddling your now naked body, she kisses down your neck biting at your collarbone. you suck in a breath at the pain. she continues kissing and biting you up, leaving marks while she situates herself between your legs. clients aren’t allowed to mark up the girls but sevika has no intention of letting you stay here after tonight.
she kisses your lips again biting your lip as she grinds into you. you let out a sigh at the strap in her pants that’s rubbing against you. “sev, don’t tease, take it out,” your hand trails inbetween your bodies trying to reach into her pants. sevika kneels over you, “so impatient,” she responds pulling her top and sticky pants off. you bite your lip, gazing up at her large, naked form. you sit up to press fevered kisses inbetween her breast.
she grabs your chin pulling you away from her hot skin, “on your knees.” you giggle, immediately turning on your knees and arching your ass in the air. sevika’s hands are placed on your ass but you shudder at the cold metal that shes been avoiding touching you with. she parts your lower lips smirking at the sticky mess that’s dripping down your thighs. she presses the tip to your entrance running it up and down your slit, making you push your hips back with a whimper before finally pushing into you.
your mouth falls open she starts a slow but deep pace. you let out gasps and moans as you feel sevika going deeper with every thrust and it only intensifies when she speeds up, “oh-ohmygosh sevvy,” you can’t handle all the wet sounds of your cunt swallowing up her strap, you reach your hand around to grab on to the hand that’s holding your waist and her cold one trails down your back, making you arch more before she grabs your hair pulling it as her hips snap against yours.
“how does it feel?” she bends to whisper in your ear. your brain is mush as moan out with drool dripping down your chin, you try to nod your head but sevika’s holding your head still with her grip. she’s stopped moving her hips with the strap sitting snug in your pulsing cunt. “words, baby.”
“yes yess, i-i love it mama,” you let out before sevika presses a kiss to your temple. “ya wanna quit ya job baby?” you turn ya head to look at her now that she’s back to kneeling, you nod your head with tears of pleasure forming in your eyes. “ya want mama to take care of you?” she pouts at you as she pushes you on to your side, she puts your leg over her shoulder holding herself up over your face.
“hm? want me to get you out of here?” “please,” you kiss her lips again as she opens her mouth, sticking her tongue in your mouth letting you run yours over hers. your body starts to tremble and you throw your head back whimpering out sevika’s name. sekiva bites you chin and kisses down you neck as she trails her hand between your bodies and rubbing circles against your clit. “such a good girl, imma take the best care of you baby. i promise.” she pants out as your hands grip on to her biceps. you cum and let out obscene moans that only sevika could ever make you make.
#i never know how to end these#wlw#lesbian#sevika arcane#sevika#arcane#sevika x reader#sevika smut#arcane x reader#sevika x female reader#toni's piece彡
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We want Alessia in every way 👀
NSFW ALPHABET💌
Alessia Russo !bottom! 18+
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
she will always want you to take her in your arms afterwards and cuddle her she will scratch your back while you do it
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
her favourite part of her body is her eyes (if that counts) she loves the way you look into her eyes and go weak in the knees
her favourite body part on you are your legs she loves to free herself on your thigh
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
she likes it when you put your fingers in her mouth after you've fingered her so she can clean everything up
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
she masturbated while looking at a picture of you when she was at camp in england
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
she wasn't really experienced when you met but she has learnt a lot
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
any position where you can eat her out
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
she likes to be a brat and make fun of you so that you know her place
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
sie liebt es wenn du sie von hinten nimmst und dabei an ihren haaren ziehst
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
she knows how rough you can be and that's why most intimacy is after sex
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
she usually mastuerbates when she is far away from you but it is never the same as when you touch her
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
she loves it when you have full control over her orgasms whether it's overstimulation or orgasm denial
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
mostly in your bed or on your kitchen counter
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
she is immediately turned on if you come anywhere near her thigh
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
a no is anal for her you often tried to persuade her but she always said no
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
she is always a loving receiver but she is extremely good with her tongue and likes to get between your legs
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
she likes it when you are rough and fast and the bed shakes
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
she likes quickies but wants to complete it the same evening
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
she doesn't want to be very risky she is afraid that someone will catch you and they will see you as she has you
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Alessia can take many rounds and loves it when you overstimulate her
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
she has no toys for herself but she loves it when you use vibrators and straps on her
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
she often teases you when you don't have the chance to have sex just to enjoy the punishment in the evening
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Alessia is very loud, she literally screams
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
high she could have sex at any time
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
she takes longer to fall asleep because she needs more time to wind down
#woso#woso fanfics#woso community#woso one shot#woso soccer#woso appreciation#woso blurbs#woso imagine#woso smut#woso x reader#alessia russo x reader#alessia russo
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Let the Light In |8|
Tara Carpenter x Fem!Reader
Chapter Eight: Old Temptations
Summary: After hiding yourself away for weeks, Anika and Henry get you to return to the living. While you're at the party they bring you to, you run into Tara before a third-party runs into your fists.
Warning(s): Swearing, fighting - whoop whoop!! that's the sound, social interactions, and drinking (underage)
Notes: I made at least ten drafts, combined them, adjusted, and here is the final product. This is more of an R focused chapter, so you'll start to see more of the internal struggles she goes through along with a special guest start. As always, I hope you enjoy
Masterlist|Previous Part|Next Part
The incandescent lights of Henry's apartment building buzz overhead as you follow him and Anika up the concrete stairs. Your boots echo against each step, creating a hollow rhythm that matches your reluctant heartbeat. You've been dreading this party all week, but your friends had worn you down with their relentless enthusiasm and pointed comments about your "hermit tendencies."
"I still can't believe you actually agreed to come," Henry says over his shoulder, his keys jingling as he searches for the right one. "Usually getting you out after exams is like trying to coax a cat into taking a bath."
"Maybe I'm turning over a new leaf," you mutter, knowing full well it's a lie. The only reason you'd agreed was because they'd caught you in a moment of weakness—specifically, when you were coming down from a three-day study binge and your defenses were too low to properly deflect their persistent pestering.
Anika snorts, adjusting her glittering top that catches the harsh hallway light. "Right. And I'm going to start watching silent films with you."
"Charlie Chaplin’s a classic," you defend, following them into Henry's apartment. The familiar scent of his signature sandalwood candles hits you immediately.
"Whatever you say, grandma," Henry teases, disappearing into his bedroom. You can hear him rummaging around, probably looking for whatever he plans to wear tonight.
You collapse onto his worn leather couch, the same one he'd rescued from a curb three years ago. Despite its questionable origins, it's the most comfortable piece of furniture you've ever encountered. Maybe if you sink deep enough into it, they'll forget you're here and leave without you.
Anika perches on the arm of the couch, already touching up her makeup in a compact mirror. "You know," she starts, and you recognize that tone—it's the one she uses when she's about to say something she thinks you won't like. "Tara might be there tonight."
Your stomach does an uncomfortable flip. "And why would I care about that?"
"Oh, I don't know," Anika draws out the words, applying another coat of mascara with practiced precision. "Maybe because you've been moping around ever since your little disappearing act?"
"I haven't been moping," you protest, but even you can hear how weak it sounds. "I've been studying. There's a difference."
"Right," she says, sarcasm dripping from her voice.
You open your mouth to argue, then close it again. The past few weeks have been a blur of textbooks, coffee, and a blend of mathematical formulas and historical documentations. You'd thrown yourself into exam preparation with perhaps more vigor than strictly necessary, but that was just your way of dealing with stress.
It definitely had nothing to do with how you'd ignored her texts afterward.
Dork (3:47 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) I can't make it tonight
Tara (3:48 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) oh. lemme knw when u can reschedule
Dork (3:48 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) Tara, don't do that
Tara (3:49 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) dont wat????
Dork (3:49 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) I know what 'oh' means
Tara (3:50 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) well then eblighten me cuz idk what ur ymmaring abt
Dork (3:51 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) *Enlighten/*yammering, and never mind
Tara (3:51 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) 🤓 is u fr
Dork (3:52 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) Excuse me?
Tara (3: 52 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) i have to explain??? but i thougt u were all knowing!
Dork (3:53 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) *Thought. I know you know how to spell, you're just reckless with a keyboard
Tara (3:53 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) my question is when did i ask
Dork (3:54 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) That's an improvement
Tara (3:54 pm - 2 WEEKS AGO) stfup.
Henry emerges from his bedroom, now wearing a fitted crop-top that every guy wore in the 80’s. "Are we talking about the Tara situation?"
"There is no 'Tara situation,'" you insist, making air quotes with your fingers. "Can we please just go to this party so I can suffer through it and get back to my peaceful, drama-free existence?"
"Drama-free?" Henry laughs, grabbing his keys. "Is that what we're calling your one-person production of 'Hamlet' these last eighteen years?"
You bite your thumb at him, but there's no real heat behind it. These are your best friends, after all, and you know their teasing comes from a place of love. Even if they're being particularly annoying about it tonight.
The drive to the party is a blur of street lights and the sound of Abbey Road. You're behind the wheel of your beloved '70 Ford Maverick, a car that Henry constantly ridicules. Anika claims the passenger seat, still fussing with her makeup, while Henry sprawls in the back, giving you directions that are more confusing than helpful.
"No, no, turn left at the next—wait, I meant right. My other left."
"Your other left?" you deadpan, making the turn anyway. "How many lefts do you have?"
"Don't sass the navigator," he replies primly. "Oh, there it is! The house with all the cars out front."
You pull up to the curb about half a block away, already feeling your anxiety spike at the sight of the crowded frat house. Music pulses from within, so loud you can feel it in your chest even from here. People mill about on the front lawn, red cups in hand, their laughter carrying through the night air.
"Remind me again why I agreed to this?" you ask, killing the engine but making no move to get out of the car.
Anika turns to you, her expression softening slightly. "Because Henry threatened to sing the entire soundtrack of 'Cats' outside your bedroom door if you didn't come."
"That was a low blow," you mutter, finally unbuckling your seatbelt. "You know how much I hate that musical."
"Desperate times," Henry says cheerfully, already out of the car and bouncing on his heels with excitement. "Come on, let's go find out what kinds of terrible decisions we can make tonight!"
You follow your friends up the walkway, trying to ignore the way your palms are already sweating. The last party you'd attended had been... well, it had been a week before your self-imposed exile. The night Tara had looked at you with those impossibly dark eyes and asked if you wanted to get some air, and you'd panicked and made up an excuse about needing to check on your nonexistent fish.
The front door is already open, music and voices spilling out into the night. As soon as you cross the threshold, you're hit with a wall of sensory input that makes your head spin. The air is thick with artificial fog from a machine hidden somewhere in the corner, mixed with the distinctive scent of cheap beer and various perfumes and colognes. Multi-colored lights pulse in time with the music, turning everything into a strobing dreamscape and your nightmare.
Henry guides you through the crowd with a gentle hand on your back, navigating the sea of bodies with practiced ease. You catch glimpses of familiar faces as you pass. They all blur together in the dim light, becoming a kaleidoscope of features that makes your head swim.
You end up at yet another worn leather couch that's seen better days, probably around the same era as your car. Henry gestures for you to sit, and you do, grateful for something solid beneath you. The cushions seem to want to swallow you whole, and for once, you don't fight it.
"I'll get us drinks!" Henry shouts over the music, already backing away into the crowd. "Don't move!"
Anika lingers for a moment, looking torn between staying with you and pursuing whatever—or whoever—has caught her attention across the room. You wave her off with a weak smile. "Go. I'll be fine right here, becoming one with the furniture."
She hesitates another second before grinning. "Try to have some fun, okay? And text me if you need an escape plan." Then she's gone, disappearing into the crowd with the grace of Mindy, someone who actually enjoys these sorts of gatherings.
Left alone, you let yourself sink deeper into the couch, watching the party unfold around you. A group of girls near the makeshift dance floor are attempting some sort of choreographed routine, though the alcohol in their systems is making it more comedic than coordinated. Two guys are engaged in what appears to be an intense debate about pizza toppings, their gestures becoming more animated with each passing second.
The bass line of whatever song is playing thrums through your body, making your bones vibrate in a way that's not entirely unpleasant. You find yourself timing your breathing to it, using it as an anchor in the chaos. This isn't so bad, you think. You can handle this. It's just a few hours, and then you can go home and binge-watch your comfort shows until the sun comes up.
"Y/L/N special!" Henry's voice breaks through your thoughts as he returns, thrusting a red solo cup into your hands. The liquid inside is an alarming shade of orange that definitely doesn't occur in nature.
You eye it suspiciously. "What exactly makes it a ‘Y/L/N special'?"
"The fact that it's specifically designed for the same people who despise candy unless it's 99% cacao," he explains, dropping onto the couch beside you with his own drink—something amber-colored that you assume is actually beer.
"That's... oddly thoughtful," you admit, taking a tentative sip. It tastes like water that’s had lemons and limes soak in it for months, the kick makes your tongue tingle. "And dangerous."
"Just pace yourself," he advises, watching as more people filter into the already crowded space. "Oh hey, isn't that Charlotte?"
You follow his gaze to see Charlotte, the person you ended things with through a text message. You try to hide behind the red plastic in your hand as you sip, but you nearly spill your bitter bread water all over yourself when she notices you. You can tell it caught her off guard; her eyes slightly widened and she took an uncomfortably long pause mid-sentence. This pause caused her friends to look over which only made things even more awkward—at least for you. After shooting daggers at you and one of them flipping you off, they linked elbows with Charlotte and took her to a different room.
You know you deserved it.
Henry sucked his teeth. “Ouch. Casanova strikes again,” he chuckled with amusement.
“Ugh,” you express in response to the name for you before downing the last of the liquid in your cup. “I’m out. I’m gonna get one more.”
One drink turns into two, two turns into three, and somewhere during your debate with Henry over which Ninja Turtle’s the best one, you’re interrupted by a pair of familiar dark brown eyes meeting yours. Your attention always seemed to gravitate towards Tara Carpenter.
You momentarily pause your expression of admiration for Leonardo, peeking over Henry’s shoulder to give Tara a downwards smile paired with a finger wave. She rolls her eyes and returns your finger wave in a mocking gesture. After Henry realizes what’s grabbed your attention, he makes an excuse to walk away.
You're nursing your fifth orange drink when she materializes beside you, seemingly out of thin air. "Seriously?" The word drips with exasperation. "You're actually hiding behind Henry?"
"I'm not hiding," you protest, pulling yourself up to what you hope is a dignified height. "I'm strategically positioning myself for optimal social avoidance."
Tara snorts—an inelegant sound that somehow makes her more endearing. "Is that what we're calling it?"
The space between you crackles with a tension that's part irritation, part something else entirely.
"I could ask you the same thing," you counter with a crack in your voice. Tara notices this and slightly raises an eyebrow while giving you a once-over. "Pretty sure you've been standing in the exact same spot for the last twenty minutes."
Her eyes narrow. "I'm observing."
"Stalking," you correct automatically.
"Strategically positioning myself," she throws your earlier words back at you, and there's a glint in her eye that makes your breath catch.
For a moment, you felt uncharacteristically at ease in such a setting—when you catch a fragment of a conversation that makes your blood run cold.
“—Carpenter's got a mouth on her that could—"
The words slice through your alcohol-induced haze like a knife. Your head whips around so fast you almost give yourself whiplash, searching for the source of the comment. Two guys are leaning against the wall near the stairs, one of them making crude gestures as he continues to make vile comments about Tara.
The pleasant warmth in your system transforms instantly into liquid fire. You recognize one of them—Marcus Wheeler from your Calculus class, the one who always makes inappropriate comments during lectures and thinks he's God's gift to mathematics. The other is unfamiliar, but the way he's laughing and encouraging Marcus makes your skin crawl.
Your muscles tense. Tara notices immediately. "Don't," she warns, a single word packed with more meaning than should be possible.
But you're already moving, your body acting before your brain can fully process the decision.
Your fist connects with his jaw before you even realize you've thrown the punch. There's a satisfying crack that you feel more than hear, followed by a burst of pain across your knuckles that you're too angry to properly register. The pain sends a rush through you, pushes you, tempts you for more.
Marcus staggers back, both surprised and hurt, but recovers quickly. He lunges for you, but your muscle memory kicks in. You sidestep, using his momentum against him, and somehow you end up on top of him, getting in another solid hit before strong hands pull you away.
The world comes rushing back all at once. The music has stopped, replaced by the murmur of shocked voices and the ringing in your ears. Everyone is staring at you, their faces a blur of surprise and judgment. Marcus is on the ground, blood trickling from his split lip, and presumably broken nose, looking at you with a mixture of rage, disbelief, and fear.
Your chest feels too tight, like someone's wrapped steel bands around your ribcage and is slowly tightening them. The weight of what you've just done crashes over you like a wave, threatening to pull you under. You need to get out—now.
You shoulder your way through the crowd, ignoring Henry calling your name, ignoring the whispers that follow in your wake. Someone tries to grab your arm, but you shake them off, focused solely on reaching the door. The cool night air hits your face like a slap when you finally burst outside, but you keep walking, your hands shaking as the adrenaline starts to wear off.
The crisp winter air hits you like a slap when you stumble outside, your breath forming small clouds in the freezing night.
“Wait!”
When did she get here?
"Let me see," Tara's voice cuts through your alcohol-induced haze, her hand reaching for yours with a familiarity that makes your head spin—or maybe you've had one too many of those orange drinks.
You thrust your hand toward her dramatically, wincing as the movement sends a spike of pain through your bruised knuckles.
"I totally got that incel good," you slur, a giggle bubbling up from somewhere deep and slightly unhinged. The ice beneath your feet seems to shimmer with your triumph.
Tara's fingers hover just above your hand, not quite touching but close enough that you can feel the heat radiating from her skin. "You're going to need ice for that," she says, her tone caught between exasperation and something else—something softer.
"Ice, huh?" You look down at the ground, the irony not lost on you.
With exaggerated precision, you bend down and scoop up a handful of snow, pressing it against your knuckles. The cold bites, but it's a welcome contrast to the burning anger and alcohol still coursing through your system.
"This works, right?" You look up at her, your eyes wide and slightly unfocused. The world tilts slightly, but Tara remains steady—an anchor in your spinning vision.
Something flickers in her eyes—amusement, maybe. "You're something else," she mutters, but there's no real bite to the words.
Emboldened by alcohol and adrenaline, you lean in closer. The words tumble out before you can stop them. "So… I never did get an answer to that proposal."
Tara goes very still. A smile begins to form, tentative and fragile as first light.
She chuckles at your remark before shaking her head and scoffing to herself. "Sometimes I just don't get you," she says with a smile still etched on her face, but there's more complexity in those words than simple dismissal as she stares back into your eyes.
Confusion must show on your face because she looks away, the streetlight catching the curve of her cheek, the set of her jaw. You didn’t know what else to say so you just said the first thing that came to mind.
“Merry birthday, Tar,” you said.
She’s taken aback by this. She didn’t know what to say, yet still opened her mouth to respond. Maybe something would come to her, but before anything did—
"There you are!" Anika's voice cuts through the moment like a knife. Your car pulls up to the curb, engine running warm against the freezing air. "We need to get out of here before that guy calls the cops."
The moment dissolves. Tara takes a step back, creating distance that feels more emotional than physical. You're left standing there, snow melting between your fingers, the taste of unresolved everything burning at the back of your throat.
As you climb into the passenger seat, you catch one last glimpse of her in the side mirror—a silhouette, perfectly still and impossibly distant.
—
The drive home is mostly silent, broken only by the occasional sigh from Anika and the gentle humming of your car's engine. Your knuckles throb in time with your heartbeat, a steady reminder of your momentary loss of control. The adrenaline is wearing off now, replaced by a mixture of embarrassment and alcohol-induced wooziness that makes you slouch lower in your seat.
"You know," Anika finally says as she pulls into your shared apartment complex, "when I said you needed to be more social, starting another fight wasn't exactly what I had in mind."
You grunt in response, too busy focusing on the way the world is tilting slightly to form actual words. The drinks are hitting harder now that the excitement is over, making everything feel soft around the edges.
"Use your words," she chides, killing the engine.
"Words are for people who don't punch assholes at parties," you mumble, fumbling with your seatbelt. The simple mechanism seems impossibly complex right now.
Anika reaches over to help you, her movements gentle despite her exasperated tone. "Come on, Rocky Balboa. Let's get you inside."
Getting up the stairs to your second-floor apartment proves to be an adventure. You insist you can do it yourself, but after the third time you miss a step, Anika wraps an arm around your waist and practically drags you up.
"I can walk," you protest, even as you lean heavily against her.
"Sure you can. Just like you can make rational decisions at parties, right?"
You attempt to glare at her, but the effect is somewhat ruined when you stumble over your own feet. "He deserved it."
"Oh, I'm not arguing that point," Anika says, fishing her keys out of her purse while still supporting most of your weight. "Marcus Wheeler is definitely in the running for Biggest Douchebag of the Year. But maybe next time we could handle it without violence? You know, like adults?"
"Adulting is overrated," you declare as she manages to get the door open. "If I was a kid, I could just pull Tara's pigtails or something."
Anika steers you toward the kitchen, depositing you none too gently into one of the mismatched chairs around your small table. "Okay, first of all, that's not the approach to crushing on someone that you think it is. Second, stay put while I get the first aid kit."
You slump forward, resting your forehead against the cool surface of the table. "Not crushing," you mumble into the wood. "Just... emotionally compromised."
"Right," Anika calls from the bathroom, where you can hear her rummaging through cabinets. "And I'm just 'casually interested' in my hot girlfriend."
"That's different," you argue, lifting your head slightly. "You two are together. You’re attached to the hip—you don’t hide from each other."
"Ha! So you admit you were hiding!"
You let your head thunk back down onto the table. "I admit nothing. I was studying. Very intensely. In locations where certain people were statistically unlikely to appear."
Anika returns with the first aid kit and a bag of frozen peas, setting both on the table. "Sit up, you disaster. Let me see your hand."
You comply with a dramatic sigh, straightening in your chair and holding out your injured hand. Your knuckles are already starting to bruise, spots of purple blooming across the skin. There are a few small cuts, probably from where you caught Marcus's teeth.
"This might sting," Anika warns before dabbing at the cuts with an alcohol wipe. You hiss through your teeth but don't pull away. "So," she continues, her tone deceptively casual, "want to talk about what really happened back there?"
"Not particularly," you mutter, watching as she carefully cleans each cut. "Can we just chalk it up to temporary insanity and move on?"
"You punched a guy for talking shit about Tara." She applies antibiotic ointment with practiced efficiency. "That's not temporary insanity. That's feelings."
You try to pull your hand away, but she holds firm. "It's not— I just— He was being gross!"
"Mhmm." She wraps your knuckles in gauze with precise movements. "And the fact that it was about Tara specifically had nothing to do with your reaction?"
"I would have done the same for anyone," you insist, even though you both know it's a lie. "It's about basic human decency."
"Right. Basic human decency. That's why you've been moping around our apartment for two weeks, taking different routes, and muttering under your breath when you think I can't hear you."
Before you can form a suitably indignant response, your phone buzzes. Henry's face appears on the screen, caught mid-laugh at some long-ago hangout.
You put the call on speaker, feeling too exhausted to hold the phone. Henry's excited voice crackles through, bursting with energy.
"Holy shit! Are you okay? That was the most badass thing I've ever seen in my life!"
"I'm fine," you mutter, wincing as Anika presses a bag of frozen peas against your bruised knuckles. "Ow! Except for my so-called best friend trying to give me frostbite."
Anika's tone is no-nonsense. "Keep the ice on, or your hand will swell up like a balloon."
Henry can barely contain his excitement. "You should have seen Marcus's face after you left. He was completely shaken. I don't think anyone's ever stood up to him like that before."
You groan, tilting your head back. "Great. Now I'll be known as the crazy chick who starts fights at parties. That'll look amazing on my resume."
"Are you kidding? You're going to be a legend!" Henry starts, then suddenly there's a scuffle in the background.
"Am I on speaker?" you ask, suspicion rising in your voice.
"No!" Henry says simultaneously with another voice declaring, "Yes!"
You recognize the second voice immediately. "Henry James Martinez," you say, using his full name—knowing how much he hates it—"Are you and Tony back together?"
"No!" Henry protests. "His place flooded, and he needed a place to stay!"
"Sure thing, Hef," you chuckle, catching Anika's amused smile.
Tony's cheerful voice joins the conversation. "Hey, heard you knocked some douche on his ass for talking shit about your girlfriend. Nicely done."
"She's not my girlfriend," you respond quickly.
Henry can't resist. "Define girlfriend."
You're ready with a comeback. "Define sharing a living space with—"
"Uh oh, bad connection," Henry interrupts, and suddenly the line goes dead. Anika bursts into laughter.
“I’m gonna get you some aspirin,” Anika offered, patting your shoulder as she passed. “But just so you know that whole ‘emotionally compromised’ thing? Yeah, that’s basically the definition of crushing.”
You make an incoherent noise of protest into the table.
"Oh, and by the way," Anika calls from the kitchen, "you're totally teaching me that right hook tomorrow. After your hangover wears off, of course."
You lift your head just enough to deadpan at her.
"Love you too, champ. Now take your aspirin and go to bed before you fall asleep on the table. Again."
Not long after she went to her room, you stumble into the bathroom, hand throbbing and head spinning—the former a reminder of the night’s events. The light is harsh against your alcohol-fogged brain. The tile floor is cold beneath your bare feet as you stumble to the sink, turning on the water and splashing your face.
When you look up, he's there.
Your Uncle's bloody corpse stands behind you in the reflection, that familiar crooked smile that's always been more predatory than comforting. His appearance is exactly as you remember from old photographs—that slightly manic glint in his eye, the way he holds himself like violence is always just beneath the surface.
"Killer punch," he says, leaning against the bathroom wall. No greeting, no preamble. Just direct observation.
You don't jump but roll your eyes. "Go away," you mutter, gripping the sink's edge.
He chuckles—a sound that's more bark than laugh. "I saw myself in you tonight. That rage? That precise moment of calculated violence? Pure genetics that chose you."
"I'm nothing like you," you snap, turning to face him directly. The bathroom suddenly feels smaller.
He takes a step closer. "Oh, but you are. That moment when you heard those guys talking about your girl? That split second before the punch? That wasn't just anger. That was hunting instinct."
You close your eyes, trying to block him out. "I'm not a killer. I'm not you."
"Not yet," he says, and there's something almost proud in his voice. "But you've got the potential. I saw how you moved. How you calculated. How you knew exactly where to hit to cause maximum impact."
"My dad’s a professional pig," you counter. "It’s not like I attended murder school."
His laugh is sharp, brittle. "Call it what you want. But we both know there's something inside you. Something sharp. Something waiting."
The argument feels familiar—like every nightmare, every family gathering where his memory haunted the edges of conversation, their fear of the parallels you both held. You're tired of it. Tired of him.
"I'm going to bed," you declare, pushing past his spectral form.
He doesn't disappear immediately. Instead, his voice follows you. "We're not so different, you and me."
You pause at the doorway, not turning around, as your hand tightly grips the edges of the doorframe. "We're nothing alike."
The silence that follows is answer enough.
As you crawl back into bed, the room feels normal again—just another night, just another internal argument with a ghost who refuses to stay buried.
But somewhere in the darkness, you can still feel him watching. Waiting.
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A/N:
gobble, gobble
#tara carpenter x reader#tara carpenter x female reader#tara carpenter x you#tara carpenter x y/n#tara carpenter#jenna ortega x you#jenna ortega x reader#jenna ortega x y/n#jenna ortega#let the light in au
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all mine. ellie w.
nsfw. your cute girlfriend doesn’t cut it, but your ex does. drabble!
regret courses through you like a raging river, each pulse in your sweaty palm amplifying the weight of the phone. the ring pierces through the silence, a relentless reminder of your impending doom. anxiously, you gnaw at your lip, the taste of iron mingling with your mounting fear. "i'm being ridiculous," you mutter, your thumb hovering over the end call button. but then, the line clicks open, and her voice, sharp and slightly irritated, cuts through the tension.
"hello?"
her tone is justified; after months of silence and the last encounter being a screaming match, she has every right to be annoyed. your mouth goes dry, and you scramble for words, your mind a chaotic mess. "you fuckin' prank calling me?" ellie snaps, her voice heavy with exhaustion. it's three in the morning, and she doesn't have time for games.
"no, no," you stammer, "i just wanted to talk to you." you facepalm, feeling utterly pathetic. you can hear her shifting in bed, her irritation palpable. "right, and you decided to do that on a random tuesday at three in the morning? bye, y/n." her voice is cold, dismissive.
"wait, no! el, please," you beg, your voice cracking. you don’t care how pathetic you sound. "you have two minutes," she sighs, the sound of rustling sheets indicating she’s sitting up. "i-uh, fuck. can you come over?" the words spill out, faster than you intend, a jumbled mess of desperation.
ellie’s not dumb. she knows exactly why you’re calling her. the unspoken truth hangs heavy in the air, thick with tension and unfulfilled desires. you want her, need her in a way that no one else can satisfy.
she always promised that no one could fuck you like she did, and she was right. latest example: the girl you’d been dating for a month, the shy girl from the bookstore where you worked. you felt dirty inviting ellie over right after you’d been with someone else. the girl was always awkward with the sex toys you’d provided, fumbling and unsure, her nervous laughter only adding to the discomfort. she tried her best, but it was clear she was out of her depth.
eventually, you had to fake an orgasm just to get it over with, feeling a pang of emptiness as you did. ellie was right once again, and you hated it. the regret and desire intertwine inside you, creating a potent mix that leaves you breathless, waiting for her response. the memory of ellie’s touch, her confidence, and the way she knew exactly what you needed floods back, making the wait even more unbearable.
the silence on the other end is deafening, each second stretching into an eternity. you can almost hear her thinking, weighing her options. finally, she exhales, a soft sound that sends a shiver down your spine. "you know this is a bad idea, right?" she says, her voice softer now, almost resigned.
"i know," you admit, your voice barely a whisper. "but i need to see you. please, ellie."
there's a long pause, and you can imagine her sitting there, running a hand through her hair, contemplating whether to give in to the pull that always seemed to draw you two back together. "fine," she finally says, her voice tinged with a mixture of frustration and something else—something that gives you a glimmer of hope. "i'll be there in twenty."
the call ends, and you let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding. the anticipation gnaws at you, a mix of dread and excitement bubbling in your chest. you glance around your apartment, suddenly acutely aware of the mess. you start tidying up, trying to make the place look somewhat presentable, but your mind keeps drifting to ellie.
you remember the first time you met her, how she walked into the room with that confident stride, her presence commanding attention. and then there was her bike—sleek, powerful, a perfect extension of her personality. you were drawn to her like a moth to a flame, unable to resist the allure of her confidence and the way she seemed to see right through you.
as you wait, the memories flood back—late-night rides, whispered confessions, the way her lips felt against yours. the good times, the bad times, and everything in between. you wonder if this time will be any different, if the cycle of attraction and regret will finally break, or if you're doomed to repeat the same mistakes.
“can’t believe i’m doing this,” you mutter, sinking into the plush sofa and tossing your phone aside absentmindedly. the cushions envelop you, offering a fleeting comfort that contrasts with the turmoil inside. “fuck.” you pull at the frayed strings of your old pajama pants, the fabric worn thin and soft from countless washes, and glance down at the t-shirt that’s been begging to see the trash for months. it’s a relic of better times, now faded and stretched, much like your patience.
pushing yourself off the couch, you make your way to your cozy bedroom, the familiar creak of the floorboards underfoot. the soft glow of the bedside lamp casts a warm, inviting light, creating a stark contrast to the chaos in your mind. sliding open the closet door, you sift through the hangers, fingers brushing against various fabrics. you’re looking for something to wear, something sexy but not too sexy. you didn’t want to seem like a try-hard.
after a moment, you pull out a sleek black nightgown, simple yet seductive, and hold it up to the light, wondering if it will strike the right balance. the soft, silky fabric feels cool against your skin. you run your fingers over the delicate lace trim, appreciating the craftsmanship and the way it catches the light. the nightgown drapes elegantly, and you know this is the one.
it was almost comical how fast ellie had your face squished into the headboard as she fucked you with the pink strap, her soft moans droned out by your fucked out babbling.
“new girl don’t make you nut? that’s a damn shame.”
you could barely understand the words through her panting and the sound of her hips slapping into yours, but you caught the message.
you couldn't get it out of your mind, though. how did she know you had a new girlfriend? and more importantly, how did she know she was shit in bed? you weren’t exactly sure, and you knew if you asked you would probably receive an answer you weren’t fond of. you tried to push the thoughts from your head, but it wasn’t easy to focus with her thrusts becoming even more erratic, her fingers digging deeper into your hips.
but she did have a point, didn't she? you'd never come that hard from any other partner.
you could feel yourself nearing your second climax as she relentlessly pounded your sweet spot. you were almost embarrassed with how much your body was shaking and spasming, but with ellie it was nothing to be ashamed of. she loved seeing you completely vulnerable for her. spread out, taking each deep thrust like the good girl you were.
"you like that baby? huh? tell me you love it," her words were more demanding than they were questioning, your eyes crossed in bliss.
"i-i lov-e it! oh god!" you choke out, she smiled at your reaction, her chest pressed against your back as she moved you down to lay flat, the new angle making her thrusts even more unforgiving as your knees shook in pleasure. you let out a pathetic squeal, a mixture of spit and tears on the hardwood.
"yeah you do baby, takin’ it like a good girl," she pulled you up so your back was against her chest, the hand that was on your hip was now rubbing fast circles around your clit. your body twitched as you moaned loudly, a familiar feeling burning in your stomach.
“tell me you’ve missed me.”
you have. fuck, you’ve missed her a lot.
"missed yo-y-mm-m g-gonna c-cum ellie-ellie!" you moaned, the feeling becoming too much for you.
"it's okay, cum for me," your hips jolted and your body went rigid, the knot inside you snapping as your vision went white, the only thing keeping you grounded was ellie's arms holding you steady. you gasped as the feeling overtook your body, ellie slowing her movements to help you ride it out.
you came for a second time that night, your eyes rolling back and tears of ecstasy staining your face. she slowed down as your body calmed down, her hand leaving your hip to gently stroke the back of your thigh. you couldn't believe this girl.
she had you crying for her.
she slowly pulled out, watching in amusement as your legs still twitched. you felt the weight shift on the bed as she got up, the pink strap hitting the floor with a thud. you stayed in the position she left you, unable to move after being so thoroughly fucked.
she returned moments later, wiping the mess from your thighs and between your legs. she helped you turn over and lie down, and you finally saw the look of complete and utter adoration on her face.
fuck. you’re in so deep.
im cummin, love my gf. as always, likes, comments and reposts are appreciated! bunny out ໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১
#ellie x you#ellie x fem reader#ellie x reader#ellie x y/n#ellie smut#ellie willams x reader#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams#tlou x reader#ellie tlou#ellie
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In one of your ask answers from September you wrote: ''I am a bit reluctant to say what I really think of Faust''. I skimmed over other answers as well but you never really spoke on this matter or about him (concerning this) again. Perhaps it's going to be an empty ask because you're still not comfortable elaboring your views on this - which I accept naturally - but I'm just way too curious to not shoot my shot: what do you REALLY think about Faust?
I personally do not have much going on opinion wise when it comes to him, he seems loyal to Øystein's memory (visiting his grave often, speaking highly of him always, keeping his legacy alive and over all being full of admiration for him, which is understandable since Ø could count as his role model, in a way) which is nice considering how people from the BM scene try to paint Ø, stuffing their mouths with his name just for views and/or turning their backs on him after his death ; but I am also aware of the crime he commited and as far as I recall, he never really spoke about it? Which is also why many people despise him (which is normal, absolutely not trying to imply that 'talking about it' would solve the problem!) the double amount, for example you can see it here: https://www.reddit.com/r/rabm/comments/mz7s97/the_lgbt_heavy_metal_podcast_24_emperor/. Anyway, I'm more interested right now if your opinion, if you'd like to share. Thanks!
There are many reasons why I'm reticent in saying what I truly believe about Faust, but I will try to express it in the gentlest way possible. My opinion is not something colossal as there isn't much information available on the subject, but it's definitely a radical one.
I see lately that more and more people have a tendency to make opinions about certain problematic black metal individuals that are 'Øystein approved or disapproved'. In this case, I can easily include Faust. I see people willing to downplay the gruesome and intentional murder that he committed for the simple fact that he was one of Øystein's loyal 'students', so to speak. So, my question for those is:
Does the simple fact that Faust spoke honorably about his mentor make him less of a bad person for taking the life of a man? The most rational answer is no.
I see many people believing blindly that Faust is truly remorseful and that he learned his lesson in prison, and my question about this is: How can you be so sure? Just because he is out now, talking about how he messed up because he was a kid and how much he changed since then doesn't mean that he means his words. Anyone can say anything. You don't know if it's real unless you know that person personally, and even so, he went to prison for first degree murder. I don't think it's far-fetched to doubt his words. Once you're some kind of celebrity, you need to keep your PR good. And if you don't think that everything in this world is business, then you don't really know how the world works, and I apologize for sounding rude.
No one can prove or disprove that his mentality (not action) changed.
It is very expectantly for him to try to clean his image and redirect the attention to other subjects like talking positively about Øystein. I don't say he is not respectful and he doesn't carry on Øystein's legacy, but I'm saying that it's wise to be aware who says what and what might be the reason behind it. There are other people that I'm more inclined to believe their feelings towards Øystein and loyalty are more authentic, like Mortiis for example. This is just my opinion, I encourage everyone to think for themselves.
Maybe I'm too harsh on him and I don't give him many chances, but he is a criminal after all, and I don't minimize this aspect. He didn't kill in self defense, he talked in interviews about 'stomping' on the victim's head, and this is cruelty. Do people think this cruelty somehow goes away over time? It never does. You're either born with it or you learned it. That's not PlusVanity being bitter about what can be changed in people. That's a well-known psychological fact. He is in the ASPD spectrum towards the high end, that's no speculation.
The time spent in prison is the equivalent of a joke because of the Norwegian system. You're basically living like in a hotel there, painting and doing crafts, playing basketball with the guards, living a long vacation. There is little to nothing that a troubled individual can learn and self-reflect in such conditions. I'm not saying that more violent habits are the answer for behavioral change as I strongly believe that violence is primitive and unnecessary, but the only way in which someone can get an insight on themselves is by feeling the equivalent consequences of what they've done.
People question if he killed a man because his victim was homosexual or he if simply killed just to feel how it is like. Both options make Faust just as much of an asshole because he took somebody's life intentionally. When asked about his opinion on homosexuals, he answered: 'Basically I don't care about them (as long as they keep it to their own people), but... what can I say... they are nice to put knives into..' In another interview he describes luring that man to the spot in which he committed the crime. There's always the element of shock-value in the black metal scene, but I tend to believe his words back then were a bit more genuine than what he insists on now because, to be fair, who wouldn't want to clean his image after something like this? Especially because he is still relevant in the scene.
Of course that his peers accepted right back like 'hey, bro! nice to see you again' and many people forgot his dark past because he's famous (to a certain degree). Is he a perfectly good guy now just because he says he is? When talking about antisocial behavior, somebody who did this can always do it again. They have it in them.
To sum it up, from a moral perspective, I don't like Faust and I'm not easily impressed by his post-prison statements because of the gravity of his act. Should he be forgiven or cancelled is not something I will comment about. There is no way to verify what's in his head and talking more about it is simply rambling.
From a musical perspective, he's a good drummer.
That's all I can say.
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there is no ptr/UJL pokemon au I'm disappointed in this fandom/j
So anyways the only ideas I have is that ma san has a rillaboom bc she. Plays drums. And would evolve her pokemon to it's last evo I think. And that lammy would have a psyduck. Nothing else.
Anyone got any ideas lmao
#talk post#i love this blog i want to live here#um jammer lammy#parappa the rapper#Pokemon#parappa#Lammy#Ma san#ptr#I feel like I could figure out what Pokemon colonel noodle would have for some reason#I can't fucking spell colenal#Why does it have no r but sound like that
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why did someone on telegram just dm me asking if im not sick of being hyperfixated on woy after a year
#n they deleted their acc so i cant message them back 💀#it sounded mean but its probably a joke#it must be a joke cuz the only ppl who have my telegram n know im a woy fan r nice#probably#but im kinda 💀💀💀#like what does that even mean#funny asf if ifs a joke tho i totally fell for it#but like bro what if it isnt 😭😭😭#the only hate i ever got was some kids being racist under my redraws on tiktok#n it wasnt even directed at me#but also wow :33 someone cared enough to track down how long ive been a woy fan for :3#this is so stupid#pbj#idk why im posting this on tumblr this was supposed to be my art blog or whatever man#imagine they read this this gonna be so awkward lmfao
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as an indigenous two spirit queer person, for upcoming pride month & indigenous history month for the love of fucking g-d can we FOR FUCKING ONCE unite under ONE UNITED queer community & stop whining & bitching over who gets to use what term & over bullshit that doesn't even matter when people are literally in concentration camps all around the world & queer people are in danger & to look at your local communities & center indigenous voices (& other queers of color) in your activism. get yourselves together holy fucking shit.
#''can [x] use [f slur d slur etc] slur'' WHO FUCKING CARES#''can men be lesbians/can women be gay men'' WHO FUCKING CARES#as long as you're not being a cultural appropriator by taking closed cultures that youre not a part of you're literally fucking fine#why do yall have to make this shit so fucking complicated its ridiculous & it reeks of privilege im so sorry#does this sound mean? yes. do i care? no. im TIRED of trivial bs like this at every pride month when ACTUAL issues are going on the world r#& also for the love of fucking g-d center voices of color in queerness#especially two spirit voices bc im tired of yall nonnatives only using us as a fucking token then throwing us aside whenever its convenient#also PROTECT JEWS & ROMANI BC NAZIS ARE ALWAYS TARGETING US FIRST#this is probably just my aspd talking but i dont give a shit rn. + no discourse or im slaughtering you kthx#arcana.vents
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gonna be annoying in the tags
#i have never understood the character = actor thing#like genuinely i dont fucking get it at all#if anything i think it both discredits the actors effort and the people that actually created the medias efforts#actors very rarely have anything to do with the characters creation nor do they have anything to do with a character outside of portraying#them like tbh i feel like its a massive insult to the work that goes into acting and writing#plus i just dont really care for actors personally#but thats just a me thing#idk!!! charlie cox does not equal matt murdock he had nothing to do with creating matt murdock#or like cillian murphy as jonathan crane#i dont like jonathan crane because he looks like cillian murphy i just like jonathan crane#like yeah he did a great job with acting in the trilogy and portrayed him great#but cillian murphy doesnt have any of the traits i like in jonathan crane idgaf about that guy aside from like two roles hes done#i dont know man#i just feel like itd be shitty to put months or years into the creation of media#into method acting and portraying these characters with the help of writers and directors#just for characters to not be acknowledged as seperate from their actors#idk. like jonathan crane is played by cillian murphy they have the same face whatever#but that is in no way shape or form the same guy at ALLLLL#idk. also fucks with fandom portrayals of characters#i.e booktok white women projecting poorly written smut onto every middle aged man ever#like you dont look at animated media and equate that character to their VA why would you do it for live action shit#you dont look at writers work and equate their characters to themselves#uuugggggghhhhh#plus i think the film idustry in general tends to give actors too much credit for the creation of media#not to say actors do nothing because they definetly do im interested in acting myself#but brother they r not the ones that direct and write and edit and sound mix and all this other shit#skyler posting#soigh#anyways
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#T's “what did u call me? do u think whatever that is is hot? okay then good”#i love the tour pic above K!#and i love how they r still plucked abt not being in Dune2#K the avid winker...#its so cute how T is featured on this album of K's too😭😭😭#T wants to be left alone (on the phone) on her bday and K wants attention... well... ((once again relating to K))#T looked at Ks belly in a suprisingly like? soft way? idk i might have hallucinated that but who knows.#fuck whoever didnt visit K when she would have wanted them to.#its sweet how T visited her! (srsly cant u just communicate who wants what in this situation so its no suprise? ik its hard for them but😭)#T describing Ks party attending habits!!! they know each other soooo well🤭#aaagh how they have to act like they cant easily spend 2 hrs together having fun when they literally cant wipe the smiles off of their faces#(lesbians..... lovesick idiots.......)#oh they r always facetiming! so adorable :(#T was so excited that they r linked! like girl u do not need more confirmation for that research do u?😭#K watching the pod...... my heart......#why dont they just sit closer if they will reach across a whole fucking room to touch eachother?? like it sounds easier for me but u do u!#i really get a kick out of K mentioning TRHPS anytime she does it bc ik it was such a big thing in Ts life and ugh😭#constantly praising each other😭😭😭😭😭 what if i start sobbing huh#well maybe T is trying to get K to learn how to flirt so that she can practice on her? just an idea?😁#K putting her leg up on T?????? hi what? jist sit in the other's lap u creatures... its okay we can all look away for a sec if u need it...#their art! i fucking love it! both of it! its art at its finest🛐 and id kill to see a collection of their drawings bc cmon they r amazing!#its cute how they r talking abt smth and then they go “oh wait we were there together!”#its almost as if they actually spend time hanging out😱 (dont let the police know!!4!4)#“if we were on DR now-” okay but why r u still dreaming of that miss T?🤭🤭🤭 (who could blame her)#them watching the movies the other one recommends is the closest we can get to them watching an actual thing together (outside of NF)#also im so happy T spent time w K on her bday :(((#trixie mattel#katya zamo#tbatb#the brians
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its so embarassing likee. going to talk abt a feeling you have but you already know ppl will be like Oh that sounds like depression lol and its like. well yes . i know . trust me i am so aware i am depressed . but its still like a thing ive been thinking abt and wanting to talk abt but ik itll just be like Ok hun 👍. idk idk what response i would want tho ig FNFNFNF
#not anything serious i was just thinking how like. idk. this is gonna sound rly stupid#but for me personally like. sometimes. How do i phrase this without sounding rly evil#i think obv ppl can spend their money however they want but like. its kind of hard 4 me to grasp sometimes like. there r things that ppl#spend a lot of money on bc it makes them happy like umm. vacations or pets or hobbies or whathaveyou. and obviously thats fine but#i iust feel like its all so. temporary and like. idk. idt im ohrasing this right at all i just likee. the thought of working all year to#afford to take a vacation and then working again to afford another vacation just makes me feel like i want to die. like. idk... i like#vacations we dont need to go on them a lot but ig its just like. everything we do just feels like a waste of time. not in like a Ohh you#should be doing more work Obviously its just like. idk. maybe it is just me. but i feel like im just waiting until i die and can be done#with it i guess. and everything i do is just to fill time until that happens. yk ? which is silly bc of my whole. Thing i cant talk abt#but ppl talk abt like. going out and partying or going on vacation or whatever and i like. I like those things its nice when they happen#but they dont rly make me longterm any happier i guess. everything just feels like another thing im doing. idk. this rly isnt coming out the#way it is in my head. and Again i know this is just depression shit or whatever im just like. its all exhausting. it just makes me feel so#tired. to think abt working and working and working so i can pay to be alive and i can save to do one fun thing every so often to keep me#sane enough to keep working and working and working and i probably wont ever be able to retire itll just be. work. and then ill die. yk.#but i feel like the vacations and stuff dont like. refresh me very much. maybe its just bc ive only been on one 'vacation' as an adult and#it was just like. coming home to see my family. and realizing id have to move back home yk..#+ like. my mom nd my gran taking me out for a weekend when i lived up there#nd those things were nice and all but once its over its like. it doesnt fuel me to keep going it doesnt make me feel any better abt having#to work for the rest of my life#ik im being ridiculous bc im literally unemployed and i cant even get up off my ass to get my stupid fucking ged so i can get a job and be#Useful to my family its just like. idk.... i try so hard to be like Oh nothing mayters and thats why everything matters type thing like. Yes#all things end and the point is to just try to be happy until it does#but i feel like it just doesnt happen for me. i feel like any happiness i feel is so insanely like. it happens and then its gone. and its#back to just. the knowledge that im still fucking stuck here. and i will be until it happens. yk. i play video games tomoass the time until#i go back to sleep then i wake up and i make a spreadsheet to pass the time until i go back to sleep#and everyday just feels like passing the time until i go back to sleep and itll just keep going until it happens. and its nice to have nice#days but whats like. the point. yk. everything just ends#IDK. this is all very whiny im sry. ive just been feeling it a lot lately . i hope this doesnt feel like me being like Ohhh you ppl r so#dumb participating in hobbies and going out and having fun dont you know yr gonna DIE? thats not what im trying to be like#its just like. i feel like it doesnt make me as happy as it does other ppl like. none of it refreshes me or makes me want to keep going
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I AGREE its so crazy how zap gags weren't a thing.... like TTCC really popped off with that one! i understand TTR is moreso sticking closer to the way TTO was but WOW zap just feels so natural with a REALLY good mechanic that uses strategy in using squirt and its just so good.... also my favorite track
YEEEPP!! That's how I feel about it. Squirt and zap just mix well together. I also think the addition of an 8th gag track was also a good move, allowing for a nice rotation of combinations (like how lure-trap and throw-drop are together as a combo). And also its a nice even number. I also think it helps utilize squirt, idk just feels good to do in general. Of course, I don't really have anything to compare this to and it's just me speaking as a player of (currently) one server, so take what I say with a grain of salt.
It's my favorite too, zap warriors UNITE!!
#clemask#clemramble#this is also not me hating on tt r either#actually i probably dont have to space that out because this is going to appear in word search anyways but still#i know sometimes there's a little bit of competition (is that what youd call it)? between the two servers. i want it to be stated that#i do not care about server comp. play what you want. who cares. i think both servers have their pros and cons and finding value in what YOU#like is more important than which one is the “”best“”. I think TR does an amazing job of taking TTO and transforming it into something more#while also staying true to the original game. i love the fact it brings some of the old concepts that were originally scrapped or lost#i also like the toon events that they have. like there was the halloween one and if i believe correctly it had a parade in it?#SUPPPERR COOL. i shouldve atleast played a little during that time just to experience it. but to be fair during the school year my#playing in general is toned down a lot. im sure everyone reading this knows how it is#and obviously i like ttcc. it has mac and winn. i mean what who said that.theres a ghost in here....#and i can understand why people like or dont like each server. they all have pros and cons. but to me its like the two cakes image#sorry i felt the need to clarify bc i know im kindof exclusively a ttcc guy and me going 'ummmm well tt r doesnt have zap' might sound#like im hashtag hating but im not. tt r is awesome ok. i need to try it out one day.#i just really like zap as a gag. like anon stated i think it just really feels natural to the game#that water electric combo does wonders
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need to be fr
#I hate venture SO BAD because like they r a full ass stereotype........#im sorry u make a character who is unattractive be the canon trans one? they dont even fit into the story#not to mention OD COURSE they made the nonbinary person look and sound like a girl or at least an afab person can we be fr#plus the whole rock eating thing? are we really? making the tide pod autism buzzfeed joke a full ass person#why the fuck do they have eyeliner to make them look girly. why did they not actuallyake them androgynous#does nobody see the issue with making a canon trans nonbinary person look exactly like a woman and using stereotypes for them#. i am going insane .
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I find it weird how ppl will say for reasons that systems are fake is that multiple alters talk similar or have similar interests. Have u ever met siblings. They talk similar and have similar interests because they've spent years together ya dork, as systems start to get along more they're gonna start sharing more interests and speech patterns just like you with people you spend a lot of time with lol. Also they all share a life, they have to be able to act like each other to get by and seem "normal."
#this isnt directed ive just noticed that me and willow steal each others interests a lot and its making me think abt all the ppl ive seen#using that reasoning in fake claiming. me and her dont really talk similar but i can imagine that happening with systems who#talk to each other or mask as each other more.#idk. its to our best interest to share skills and interests. if only one person likes/knows writing then we have a problem when we need to#write and they're not present. if only one person likes/knows guitar we're in big trouble in guitar class if they're not present.#and we NEED to get along to operate so its good for us to have things to bond over! we used to argue a lot and it was fucking annoying and#made life hard. i couldnt take care of the body and willow was depressed and it made the brain miserable and it sucked#so the more we can get along the better and i think having things in common is good for that!#like i said we dont really talk the same and for us that works just fine but for some systems that could create communication barriers.#idk. i just think ppl should think a little more about why alters might become similar over time. me and my cohost r literally like family#system#osdd#did#multiple#plural#edit: actually maybe i do pick up speech from her. she says 'my friend' a lot and sometimes im tempted to say it cus its nice#but i feel like it sounds weirder coming from me 😅#OH AND LOVELY. she uses the word lovely so much ive just picked it up. its such a good adjective#idk why usually you expect the host to be the one whos language people copy but i feel like i pick up things from willow more than she does#from me.
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SCULPTURES OF ANYTHING GOES AS OPENER FOR THEIR THIRD GLASTO HEADLINER
1. Sculptures
2. Brianstorm
3. Snap
4. Chair
5. Crying lightning
6. Teddy picker (when I get bent over?!! Alex!!!) https://www.instagram.com/reel/Ct4DUGpgtMn/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== (it’s rather ‘ya’ but we can pretend)
7. Cornerstone (I knew she’d understand instead of thought/she didn’t say that whooo, I just added that for you you’re welcome)
Interlude something about water by Alex on the piano (get this man his water he’s thirsty)
8. Why’d you only call me when you’re high (having mad instead of bad ideas/ plus epic pose)
Shout out by Alex for Space pictures
9. Arabella
10. Four out of five (loving butt slap for Cookie by Alex/ why don’t you come and stay with ME/ effective very effective what a night what a night, yeah man)
Smiling Alex
Angelic Alex
11. Pretty visitors (now’s me chance x3= rushing off to bowl and it’s a strike= happy little Alex jumping back on stage and then his mic was shut off for a sec there 🤣)
12. Fluorescent Adolescent (some kisses and a thank you from Alex)
Oh god he looks so baby in that picture
13. Perfect sense (another thank you 🥹)
Pouty mouth (he does look tired)
14. Do I wanna know (afterwards “astonishing”/ how are you feeling everybody *cheers* well I’m delighted about that)
15. Mardy Bum (thank you/ alright let’s leave the past behind)
16. There’d better be a mirrorball (conductor Alex at the beginning/ hey HEY at the end)
17. 505 (without Miles 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭his first note sounded so unsure/ the in ears only now getting removed gotta be a new record/ thank you for having us everybody it’s the Arctic monkeys/ so predictable I know what you’re thinking whoo)
18. Body Paint
Encore
19. I wanna be yours (Matt and backup sang and played I wanna be yours (second verse)while Alex sang STAR TREATMENT (first verse)/ thank you thank you very much) (for a second we had “Miles” there)(the Glastonbury special surprise; also genius move to reclaim IWBY from TikTok by hijacking it with TBHC)
A video of that beautiful medley
“Who are you gonna call the Martini police the who?”
20. I bet you look good on the dance floor (Matt having mic problems and some vocal ones aswell(sounded like a scratchy throat))
“We are gonna leave you now we can’t stay with you anymore but fank you for having us something tells me…something tells me that you’re gonna be okay good night”
21. R U MINE?
I mean I know it’s basically literally their normal concert playlist apart from that I wanna be yours/ star treatment medley (which was out of this world 🌚;)) but I still loved it apart from that heartbreak with 505 cause honestly don’t care what they play I’m still loving it and having a blast, great tunes great vocals an amazing night spent in front of the laptop screaming along (what if they had planned a different set list (in 2013 Alex said “that’s what we’re gonna do tonight everyone. we are gonna play some new shit. We’re gonna play some old shit. We are gonna play some things that are just Glastonbury specials, do you know what I’m saying”) but due to Alex falling sick they didn’t have time to practice so they settled for their usual setlist?) (genuinely feel sorry for Elton John and his humongous set cause i doubt that anybody can scream along on Sunday still)
And I love how all the real fans can easily agree that it was a fantastic gig while the TikTok fans and dark fruit lovers are whining in their mum’s basement how they didn’t just play do I wanna know and snap out of it in 10 different versions and how dare Alex that his voice and taste in music evolved and that they didn’t try and emulate the phenomenal, seminal career changing Glasto 2013 🤣🤣
Opening
Do I wanna know
Mardy Bum via BBCradio1
I bet you look good on the dance floor
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The BBC intern having some fun ( he’s gonna get tacos on the well reviewed taqueria of course)
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WARNING !! do not look at the comments 🤢 you don’t wanna see that shitshow that some ‘fans’ pull but I guess some people just can’t be satisfied cause their own lives are so shit that they have to lash out at whoever is available
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Rock band Arctic Monkeys’ headline set on Friday night was watched by an average of 1.5million viewers on BBC One.
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https://www.instagram.com/p/Ct3ngjTLG7R/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
https://www.instagram.com/p/CuG4TRQLpjM/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
https://www.instagram.com/p/Ct_-x1NtosH/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
The full audio of Arctic Monkeys’ Glastonbury 2023 set
#Glastonbury 2023#alex turner#arctic monkeys#I’m no expert but his voice sounds good so grateful he does this#he’s playing around again so I guess he’s really all fine again#why is whoever is responsible for the song titles so much slower than me 🤣#dang are there many kids in the audience (literally children)#either it’s the livestream I’m staring at or there are actually some technical difficulties with the volumes and feedbacks#and we are far into overtime surprise 🤣#Jo immediately praising them the setlist and their vocals afterwards is so real go girl#Jo just casually saying they are her babies before the set 😭#so happy that all the reports and articles so far are glorious and praising the boys to the sky how they should and deserve it#Instagram#I love R U MINE? but at the same time loathe it cause then I now it’s over and that just isn’t okay#also cool to know that måneskin watched the AM and Lana set and that Damiano met Alex (would really like to know how that went)#cause both Victoria and Damiano posted videos of it but we also have an older pic of Ethan with Miles Kane mercy#Alex Turner der hottie (my friends reply to my livestream pic of Alex)
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btw controversial but fuckk ptsd dude yohre telling me judt bc my parents shouldnt ever have been parents now i have to be fucked up for the rest of my life .
#i know like..coping mechanisms and ris8ng above and learning to live with it but like its fucking stupid and unfair bc im never gonna stop#having ptsd yk. my episodes might get less frequent i might build happier memories but jm always gonna have these memory blocks and trigger#s and nightmares like. forever. im never gonna get to have had a normal childhood thats the most fuckedbup thing ever#like ik this is whiny but like. why. why me what did i do to deserve that childhood. not that any kid deserves abusive childhoods obviously#it sounds like im like ermmm there r wayyy worse kids who shouldve been the ones to go to the zoo 💀 but like ykwim. why does#thus have to happen to so many ppl i hate it i hate it. i wish i could just Actually forget everything instead of just like. not rly#remembering it but Knowing it..yk. i know everything that happened to me even if its all blocked out#and i still feel like. the effects of it even the stuff thats jncredibly hazy to me. and jm never not gojng to feel that. my personality hs#literally been fucking shaped by the childhood i have and like. yes you can 'change' your personality a bit and your choices blah blah blah#but like. even with that. im still always gonna be like. my first impulse will always be distrust and doubt and fear. even if i train#myself not to Act on those emotions i still will always feel them. im always going to expect people to leave even if they dont even if i#dont let myself push them away its something im always going to be terrified of in the back of my mind. im never gojng to have#proper social skills bc i fully missed out on that stage of development im never going to be like. at the same level as my peers bc i#missed out on those skills. sigh. ik ik ik feeljng inhuman and feeljng different from everybody else is a jniversal thing but i truly think#im like. im missing something that everybody else seems to have and i dont even know what it is but i know i dont have it and everyone#can tell j dont have it and it fucking. sucks . basically
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