#This cracked but I think its really funny and you cant stop me from combining my two favorite things <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[miiilowo]

How would you characterize Micheal throughout the years of his life?

i think shithead older brother plain an simple is the best way to start out. this can be hard to communicate if you did not grow up with two older brothers, but it is very simple:

objective as the youngest is to survive

theyre still nice sometimes but largely try to throw shit at your soft skull to try and dent it

jealous that the youngest sibling gets more attention/is praised more/etc

and i think thats pretty on the head for michael. i dont think he was ever TRULY trying to be actively super malicious, i just think he was an asshole teenage brother who thought making the little shit who got all the attention cry was funny if it meant he didnt get in trouble. definitely the 'im sorry hit me back hit me ill let you hit me if you dont tell dad please stop crying' type

when youre a teenager youre gonna have a lot of pent up emotions from a whole combination of things. a lot of them are gonna come from nowhere and youre gonna want to pin it on stuff, even if its not the actual cause. i think michael also probably did this and pinned any anger or inner turmoil he had on evan, regardless of if he actually had anything to do with it, because thats just like. standard 15-17 y/o behavior

after accidentally killing evan hes gonna be really fuckin upset. he was a dickhead, but he didn't want to kill anyone, that much is evident. theres two routes people typically take, which are "wow hes an unforgivable piece of shit" or "he's immediately amended of all sins and is nice now because he feels guilty". both of these are bad

he is a kid. an angry one at that. if an already angry kid kills their brother on accident, has guilt-induced nightmares about it, and probably hallucinates about it too? theyre not gonna get nicer, thats for damn sure!! i dont know if he could get MEANER, given the fact he has no targets, but i definitely think he'd get more snappy and probably a lot more paranoid. really a perfect storm to hallucinate even more (source: me) and then feel worse (source: me) and have it snowball (source: me)

gradually hes gonna get better. hes gonna learn to live with it. and i know for a DAMN fact this guy is funnysilly when hes an adult. constantly cracking jokes about his own demise, probably so thoroughly fed up with The Horrors that he reacts to shit like a letsplayer does. copes with everything via humor. best of all, thats backed up by the security logbook, making me the most objectively correct person on planet earth

i think when it comes to like. post-ennard mike, he'd probably lose some of that spark? you can only be so normal when youre a literal zombie shambling around. definitely would still retain the humor, but i think overall he'd be more grim. he's already died, he knows he cant live a normal life, and his only purpose is to kinda shut down everything his father started. thatll certainly weigh on the soul

[pigeonliker420]

been reading a lot lately as in finishing one book every two or three days (several of which i should really go back and reread to let it melt into my brain, they were good) (this is amazing considering my pace for the last few years has been 1 a year) but fucking starship troopers. its hanging me its like hitting a brick wall its meeting a book where im making excuses to not read. and ive hateread stuff (this is a bit of a hateread ig)

i think its a combination of the pacing being both slow as shit and fast as it jumps around, none of the characters being particularly likeable or memorable, and. obviously. thje fascism. its like drenched in it thats why i picked it up actually i wanted to see it for myself. that and. you know. reading the "classics" to inform my own writing and stop me from thinking im being a genius when im just reinventing the wheel (id only seen bits and pieces of the 90s movie, and in high school, glimpsed on others tvs, so when the whole idea of the cap trooper thing realized itself as what it was i was like aw fuck. well i wasnt doing anything new (the dying at the end/not being picked back up might be new but given this im sure theres some dystopias out there with that)) all this said theres something funny about having the workings of its military explained to me and going damn thats something id use for an evil empire

actually i think it might be a combo of thje lack of engaging characters and what id read directly previous. reading a series with an incredibly engaging viewpoint character + amazingly casual inclusion of race gender and lgbt topics is so refreshing so cracking open an ancient tome from a writer i already know i sort of dislike was bound to not impress

what i mean is its fun to read something set in the far future and even if its dystopic its where You are Normal and not worth additional commentary, but also capable of being any sort of important figure or minor throwaway, where nothing about ur identity actually figures into what roles you can or cant have

and then you read sthn written by a straight cis man who has never had to think about himself except egotistically (to put it like that is so cliche, but even in the series id read directly previous to That one i still noticed the like. cliche and contrivance with which he wrote the women, despite them being important and an attempt being made at rounding them out. i feel like the difference might more be along the lines of waving a flag going see? i dont care! i don't care! and actually not caring. but the real problem might be me comparing somewhat of a more amateur author just starting out with one with two series under her belt, though)

but im also only like 6 chapters in (despite trying my hardest) and idfk it could pick up somewhere. i usually only give up on a book after halfway if it isnt working with me but also i didnt even bother to look at how long this was, hoping to read it then watch the movie which i remember as being fun. that might be in like forever

[eli-elien]

I've been thinking of another au combining my two favorite medias

An SBI ROTSH au

The plot is a bit twisted but instead of the original accusation it's some kind of terrorism and the characters are mostly based off of their dsmp counterparts 

In each their universes there's always were a version of them.

Wilbur grew up in foster care and there was always something wrong with these families. One had two other foster kids, a blonde kid with bright blue eyes. And an older one who was recluse and quiet with dyed pink hair. They play preten sometimes and Tommy and Wilbur usually wants to play the hero while techno plays the villain to appease his lil brothers.

Techno was born in London with a twin and something so traumatic happened to the point he repressed that memory and only remembers things after the age of ten. He now lives in America.

Tommy grew up as an orphan who never got picked or got attention and so he did things to get that attention by being a trouble maker and being obnoxious. He just wants a friend. He got that friend at age 16 but found that he led him to his death.

Phil comes from a sci fi world, he's a mechanic who lost his family due to the world being so fucked up. He's motivated by their deaths and the fact that there's a beautiful sky above the smog to make mechanical wings, when he's summoned he has them with him.

Techno

As the shield hero he'll be our mc also bc he's my fave and I find c!techno and Naofumi have a ton of similarities also to have have his iconic furred red cloak. He trusts far more than he should and gets blamed for causing something he didn't do.

He gets tricked by dream, the first prince and the one who actually caused the explosion.

Phil and Wilbur don't trust him except Tommy does because Dream seems "cool" and stuff ya know I mean he is like 16 soooo ye 

After weeks he sees a two teens get beaten up and and he knows he shouldn't get involved but his body moves before he can think and smartly beats one of them and runs away with the kids.

The kids are ranboo who's half cat and raccoon and very very weird looking and tubbo who's a goat hybrid. This is where he learns how fucked up the world is and gives the boys a lil speech abt how he doesn't trust people but they don't wanna leave techno and is willing to do whatever they can to help techno 

Wilbur

The sword hero, and his wit and charm is sharper than his sword. Due to his upbringing he doesn't trust easily and as someone who had to manipulate his way to survive he can see through dream and just does not like the guy.

Tommy

As the spear hero he can too much and because of his upbringing he gets attached to anyone who's nice and gives him the attention he's always needed. And unlike motoyasu he drinks his respect women juice.

He's still obnoxious but very very rude

Phil

He definitely didn't ask for this but fine he'll play their game. Hes the bow hero

Oh of course the monarchy is being a bitch ok.

Ye he never trusts the government bc of his world and definitely isn't trusting of that masked green fucker.

Before the big fight with the Pope (who I don't know will be) he and Wilbur explore and find out some secrets.

Tommy is fighting techno bc he thinks he killed them when it was actually the church and Tommy actually enjoyed his time with Phil and Wilbur and actually sees will as his older brother figure so ye very upset 

But after wards its revealed it was plot for dream to become king and he has a trial and Tommy is the one withthe idea to change Dream's name to bitch boy and green fucker which makes the rest of sbi laugh 

Wilbur yells "suck it greeen boooooy" and it's so funny anyways *dissolves*

[missmeinyourbones]

HELLO I JUST WANTED TO SAY THE AOT CHARACTER IVKS KEEP ME UP AT NIGHT BUT ALSO HAVE MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD I ALMOST THREW UP SO THANK YOU!!!!

And!!!!

Can I ask for AOT character's as parents but like.. the stuff they do wrong that their spouse would get mad at them for and that makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE like??? "Why did you use a solo cup to feed Charles?" "All the bottles were dirty." I am LIVING for this stuff rn 😭😂

this is so fucking funny please. i love a good crack post, esp when its aot characters being stupid. here are some aot characters x stupid parent moments. also thank u for reading the icks im super glad they made you laugh ^v^ 

eren doesnt feed his babies real food. like food that will actually provide their growing bodies w nutrients and vitamins. you ask him to pack their lunch for school and you look over and see him putting in the whackiest shit: a few peanuts, a bag of cheetos, some oreos, a singular laffy-taffy. hes sick for that. also when his babies are really young and cant eat solid foods yet hes like babe can i give them a bite of pizza? can i let them try this cookie? NAUR 

mikasa read once that talking to your baby in a normal adult voice provides faster growth and development so she refuses to talk in a baby voice or play with your kid in a child-like manner. she speaks to your baby like a normal ass person (which has its pros!) but is so fucking funny to see her converse with the 2 year old like theyre 30 and paying a mortgage. shes like “what would you like for a snack?” and the baby babbles complete nonsense and shes like “ok, i dont understand that, can you enunciate a little more?” or the baby is making a mess and shes openly says “stop. thats annoying” WHAT DO U MEAN UR BABY IS BEING ANNOYING LMFAOOOOO

armin is that weird parent that doesnt let his kid watch shows like spongebob because he thinks its somehow connected to witchcraft and doesnt teach ur kid anything. like he only lets ur kid watch tv if its an educational program (fun police fr). you come home to him and ur 3 year old watching a documentary on photosynthesis. LET UR BABY WATCH SOMETHING NORMAL LIKE DORA DAMN

mentioned this before but jean lets his kids pick out their own clothes to support their decisions and encourage self expression and confidence! but the issue w that is the fact that his kid is like 5 and picks the ugliest shit that does not match....like at all.....so they leave the house looking homeless. im talking you come home and ur kid is wearing neon orange pants with brown boots and a yellow and purple blouse that says something stupid like TROUBLEMAKER <3 and ur like jean. tell me they didnt leave the house like that. (they did.)

connie complains about changing ur kids diaper every time he does it. EVERY SINGLE TIME. he still does it, but not without being such a fucking baby about it. youve been home alone watching ur baby all day and connie finally comes home and u guys are hanging out and ur like babe can you please change them im exhausted from today and hes like EW it smells so bad :/ or GROSS IT GOT ON MY HAND >:( and you can feel your eye twitching bc ur covered in baby poop and spit from the entire day 

sasha openly swears around ur child and then acts dumb/surprised when they repeat her words. she doesnt even think to censor herself when ur baby cant talk yet so shes all FUCK and SHIT around the house. which is fine until your baby’s first word is bitch and shes like O.O WHERE DID YOU LEARN THAT. you come home and shes like show mama/dada/whoever what you learned today! and ur baby looks you dead in ur eyes and says bitch.

reiner does puzzles with your kid but gets equally if not more frustrated than they do when he cant figure it out. theyre doing a butterfly puzzle and reiner is trying to teach them how to separate the corner and edge pieces first. once they get to the middle pieces, the two of them are putting any piece anywhere it kinda fits, trying every combination and turning each piece every which way. he starts to get overwhelmed because why is this puzzle for eight year olds so fucking hard and ur daughter notices and is like “dad, its ok, i kinda wanna play dolls instead anyways”

im stealing ur example w the bottle for porco because its so fucking him. so nonchalant he doesnt even think twice about it. hes like oh the bottles are all dirty? why would i LOGICALLY THINK TO WASH ONE when i could just give them formula in a plastic cup? hes so fucking stupid he doesnt understand that babies like struggle swallowing and cant sip and stuff so hes like why arent you drinking? must not be hungry :/ IDIOT

[scarletwidowaf]

Ghost Of You - chapter 3

A/N: i think that at this point, me being to lazy and tired to fix grammer and mistakes became a part of the story. Also im very sorry for the angst, im kinda winging it but hopefully stuff will be less painful soon 😅

The beautiful art is by the incredible @chloroformcandles ! Go check her works! Im honestly obsessed and even used her art as icons on both of my scarletwidow blogs.

Warnings: angst of course, mention of death (obviously)

Words count: 1391

ao3  *  wattpad  *  Tumblr story index

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Ever since wanda joined the avengers she was trained in hand to hand combat.

Its not like she actually needed it, she always thought to herself and said it multiple times to the other female avenger and trainer, but Natasha always raised her eyebrow at her and smiled cockily at her in return.

One of wanda's favorite training sessions with natasha was when they were on the run. Steve Insisted they'll keep training as much as they can, even more than they used to as avengers. Natasha agreed, wanda did too but it didn't stop her from complaining every morning when the two women were already panting before the crack of down.

"You're too slow"

Natasha said, her hands holding the younger girl down on training mat.

Wanda tried to push the shorter woman down but with no use, natasha was small yet her grip was strong and her steady firm.

It was amazing that even when they were training and sweaty natasha still managed to look painfully hot. The older women smelled like vanilla and sweat and wanda had to admit that it wasn't a bad combination.

"Well its 5 am natasha, I'm barley even awake" she joked,.

wanda could see natasha holding back her smile. It was funny, really, that Natasha could hold the best poker face and go undercover without a hiss and without ever getting caught, but couldn't contain her smile when it comes to the younger woman.

"So lets make a deal, maximoff. If you can pin me down to the mat i will get you the coffee you like from the coffee down the street"

Wanda smiled.

"They do have a great coffee.. " she said. Natasha agreed, she liked their coffee and she liked the satisfied smile on wanda's face after she takes the first sip.

"I still don't see a reason for us to train combat" wanda grumble out. Natasha smiled at her and wanda's heart skipped a bit.

The younger woman knew she was getting into a dangerous zone with Natasha, but she couldn't help herself.

"I just gave you a reason maximoff. Im 5'3. If you cant take me down what would you do with stronger, bigger, rougher opponent?"

Natasha raised her eyebrow and moved to get up.

Natasha stood and held her hand out to the younger woman.

"You say that wasn't rough, romanoff?" Wanda asked faking annoyance.

"Barely" natasha smirked.

Wanda took the older girl's hand and got up as well.

"I will get that coffee" wanda said.

"Bring it on"

Natasha's smile was dangerously hot.

That was the problem about Natasha Romanoff, wanda knew that no mattar when, or at what situation, the older woman's smile will have a power over her, just like Natasha had.

And that was the only thought that crossed in wanda's mind when the two sat on wanda's bed in her crappy London apartment.

Its been a week since natasha came back and the two did their best to try and understand the circumstances they were in.

The good news were, that Natasha could come and go as she pleases.

wanda didn't knew where she was going when she left and natasha didn't say.

It could be counted as bad news as well.

At the few times when the two womem got frustrated, natasha would've leave, wanda would've cry and then natasha would come back and sit next to her, as close as she can.

The truth was that wanda missed being close to natasha, she was happy to have her around, to talk to her and hear her voice, but she missed her touch and her smell and having her around was getting painful.

Sometimes Wanda wanted to hug her and sob about everything.

And natasha wanted to be able to hold her, and hold her hand.

They missed each other, and sometimes it was too hard for them to be so close to each other without being able to touch.

"I went trough Agetha's book again" wanda finally said. Natasha put down the book she was reading, another novel wanda never heard of.

Wanda couldn't help her envy, because the book was something natasha could touch and hold and wanda wasn't.

"And?" Natasha said.

"I found something but i dont know how to perform it."

She confessed.

"Maybe we can go to someone who might know. Strange maybe?" Natasha said

"I dont think thats a good idea.. Ive been avoiding the other avengers ever since westview" she admitted

"Was it that bad?"

"Its just complicated. I brought vision back for awhile, well, kind of"

Natasha looked at her quietly encouraging her to continue

"I could bring him back but only there, i build these perfect life in there, nat, i had a family and a house and everything was so normal even when it wasn't"

"Why wasn't it perfect?"

"Because as real as it felt it was all a big lie. An illusion"

"Were you happy?"

Natasha asked.

"Yes" wanda admitted. Natasha smiled sadly.

"Then in was worth it, in a way" the older girl said.

"You weren't there" wanda said after a few moments.

The younger woman got up from bed. She wasn't able to sit still or look into the other woman eyes.

"I guess a part of your consensus knew that if I would've been there it wouldn't be perfect" natasha said sadly and got up as well.

"I doubt that there's any reality, fake or real one, that I wouldn't have been in love with you" natasha continued and wanda felt wetness on her cheeks. She was crying.

Natasha stood a few steps away from wanda, she didn't want to get too close and overwhelm the crying girl, but she couldn't stay away neither.

"I'm sorry nat"

"For what?" Natasha asked confused.

"For bringing you back. I just missed you so much and i was selfish.

I guess you were wrong natasha, I'm not a good person"

"I missed you too, every single day in the last 5 years."

Wanda looked up. Her eyes catching natasha's red ones.

Both women were crying. Natasha's cheeks were stained and her eyes were red, yet she was holding herself together pretty well. Probably as as a result of years of holding things inside and making her feelings.

"I blamed clint, you know?" Wanda confessed.

"We had a fight after i found out you were dead. I blamed him for not keeping you safe, and then left. I didn't spoke to him since then"

Wanda catch a glimpse of Natasha's book on the bed and wondered if the lead characters got their happy ending.

Natasha sigh, her hands massaging her temple.

"I dont know what they told you wanda. But i chose to jump. I could've let clint jump"

"You're lying, clint said-"

"That i had no other choice? Knowing him figured its better you wont know that, so you wouldn't be mad at me for doing that."

the two women were so close to each other that wanda could imagine natasha's hot breath and vanilla scent.

Natasha could see the small freckles on the younger girl's nose.

"You want to know why I don't deserve to go to heaven? Wanda" Natasha asked.

Wanda wiped her own tears.

"Why?"

"I'm selfish.

I could've let clint jump but i knew that I couldn't live with the burden and the pain so i left him to live with it instead.

I could let the world stay how it was after the snap, but I didn't. Not because I'm the honorable person you think i am, but because of you. I wanted you to get the life that you deserve."

Natasha smiled bitterly and gestured with her hands to the room they were in.

Wanda wanted to respond but couldn't. Her throat was dry and her head was aching.

"I should go" natasha said and before wanda could protest the older woman was gone and she was alone again.

After a few minutes of crying the witch took a few breath to calm herself down, before she went to her nightstand and took out a disposable cell phone.

"You're not selfish natasha, i am." She whispered.

The young witch typed a few digits and held the phone to her ear.

After a few rings she heard a familiar voice.

"Hey agnes, i need your help"

[onf-headcanons]

ONF and their high maintenance S/O (mostly about makeups and manicures)

dislcaimer : I dont support the mentality of aegyoing/manipulating/sabotaging your partner to buy you stuffs. Gifts are gifts but its not their are not full responsibility. It is also not a duty/obligation for your partner to recognize delicate makeup product when they can't and buy you your makeup product as well.

What i am saying even though here is that bf gifting lipsticks it does not mean guys should do it and also does not mean that if your own bf could not do it then they dont love you. ok let go to hcs.

Hyojin

I think he will ask you to drop the heavy makeup after you two are comfortable with each other. To him it was not your makeup that impressed him to date you.

He is the type that "I don't get make up but ok you look good" type of person, I mean have you watched how he get ready to go out in the Berlin trip? He just do basic stuffs not even a delicate touch XD

I think because he has a sister back at home? But if you think he will at least know a bit of stuffs because he has a sister then you are wrong lol

But he does understand if you wanna doll up a bit. I think he personally appreciates those times when he caught himself felt that you are dazzling.

I think its cute that maybe you only do basic light make up when going out with him but then when you join him with his friends, you wanna look good so you will put on proper make up (not over heavy ones). But Hyojin be like , " oh, come on... Its just my friends XD"

He is the type that waits for you, unless you have really bad time management, he will come over to rush you. "Hey hey hey, we are gonna be late"

Does not interested at make up or beauty stuffs so he would always questions with curiosity when he saw stuffs like.. " Glue? for what? Eyelashes? Won't it be dangerous?" (Especially you are the type that watches make up vids)

Bonus, you are in charge of his skin care, most of the time.

another bonus, the type that laughs at you if you are the type that opens your mouth when you are drawing eyeline

Changyoon

Very similar to Hyojin so I will skip make up and focus on the nail polish

(Also expanding the Changyoon who loves your hand hcs)

He knows of nail polish and the basic stuffs like base, polish and top, but did not pay full attention on manicure and pedicure stuffs

So when the first time you brought out mini UV light to cure your nails, he goes " Woah they got stuffs like that? why no one told me? I spend minutes blowing at my nails to dry during BB era"

Bonus if you work in nail salon or pick up manicure as hobby, i think you might share a bit of design you found online and ask him his opinions. His will comment a bit.

Also you might grasp his hands and try out newly thought designs on his hands

Bonus if he blushes and burst into laughter until you jokingly snap at him, "Ya, its not the first time I do design test out using your hands? Why are you beet red?"

To go deep into his mentality, he does not hate make up, he gets it. But for manicure he acknowledges it as art expression of oneself as well.

I think he prefer short nail manicure, once you get a longer sharper designs and you cant do your task like how you did normally, Changyoon nags you.

Also Changyoon thoughts on fake nail stickers, "Super convenient!"

He would love to try do your manicures if he got the chance. Not just painting plain color, he might also try following designs that your show him.

Seungjun

He is a delicate boy hahahah (watch leaders Berlin trip then you will get it)

Not the type that can recognize different shades of lipstick or foundation, but he still have basic knowledge. I do see is the type that will keep in mind what color you uses and will present you your favorite lipstick color. Or even randomly choose 1 color that he thinks it might look good on you.

I think you two will stand side by side in front of mirror and do make up and help each other check a bit. Especially eye shadow color, and hairstyles (if it is outdoor date day)

The type that notices changes on you but will tease you by keep saying the wrong answers. "Hey you look different? Is it the eyeshadow? Or was it a new earring? eh I was wrong?*devilsh smile"

He has two sisters so he is used and knows that girls and high maintenance people wears makeup. BB cream at least.

Fascinated when he first time sees you do your own manicure, he saw Changyoon paint nails during BB era, but if it is his first time seeing you painting quite complicated nail design from scratch, he goes "OOOOOOH so thats is how it done? 0A0"

I think he might introduce his sisters to you if you are a makeup artist or if you work at nail salon

Bonus if you are the type that do really minimum skin care, because of his (idk if i am using the right word) eagerness of doing facial mask, you might pick that up too lol

Both of you having facial mask on and chilling on the couch watching TV

another bonus, you two bickering because either one of you made the other one laugh too much making the mask cracked if it is dried up cream type.

Jaeyoung

He is like a combination of Hyojin and Seungjun?

Not sure on his skin care stuff but he will do basic stuff and I think he focus on stylizing his hair more? (but unlike Seungjun, Jaeyoung is more on styling using wax and hairspray)

the type who cant tell difference in lipstick shade lol

He thinks light makeup with less procedure/product look good on you. Especially if you are the one who is super insecure and wakes up super early to do heavy but natural looking makeup before work

Owh special mention, natural shade/nude shade themed makeup is his favourite

He has high respect on people who are high maintenance, but if you are too over enthusiastic he will tell you to slow down and go light heart on it, "Its to boost confidence/feel good about yourself right? Its not to impress others by overdoing it right?"

If you are a tiktok-er. I think you might ask Jaeyoung to do the my boyfriend did my make up challenge (To add, you cant trust Hyojin and Seungjun on this cos high chance if their prank mode kick in, rip. Changyoon will do it tho but you need to persuade him. Jaeyoung and Minkyun are the easiest to ask)

If sometimes Jaeyoung caught seeing you watching manicure design vids or you happened to try out a new manicure design from tutorial you saw online, he will sit beside, try hard to not disturb you. But while watching he will goes "Uwa, Shingi hada/ this is intriguing/amazing." (Try watch Mini game heaven season 2 0316, when he is the one holding the word board, the face he make as he is watching the leaders appeared in my head when writing this lol)

bonus, if you are doing really intricate work like placing a small sticker or draw a small design or sticking a small trinket? on your nails, Jaeyoung will also focus with you by holding his breath as he watches you doing your tasks

Minkyun

You trusted this boy to do BF do my makeup challenge and you regret it soon after, but the view results are amazing lol

but i think their S/O might lowkey get trauma lol and always decline Minkyun offer to help do makeup hahah

But again, when he do try to do it properly, he is ok

bonus, you two had to get another mirror because Minkyun is standing in front yours to check himself out every time he styles his hair a single bit, and it delays your pace of doing your make up.

Appreciate effort of you wanna look good, also he is the type who sits behind S/O while waiting them to finish up makeup (others will wait outside, But Minkyun is the type I want see whole process of how their S/O "transform")

Also the one who will sit beside you as you do your own manicure, or, the bf who will sit beside their S/O at nail salon watching the whole process.

But his hands are busy as he is also curious, so he will reach out to check the nail polish bottle or even the UV cure machine

So, he is also the type that will follow you into Sephora or makeup selling shops (is not that the others wont follow, but I want to highlight specifically for Minkyun). Hands busy, checking out stuffs.

Unlike Seungjun, the type that really cant tell if you change new lipstick or switched new eyeshadow.

BUT I THINK THIS PERSON, HE WILL SUDDENLY DROP A NEON EYESHAOW OUT OF BLUE IN FRONT OF YOU WHEN YOU ARE PAYING. You are gonna fluster if you are not the type who do daring colors. Minkyun only giggles and say " You wont know if you don't like it if you try?"

the funny bit, its not even him paying when he wants you to try lol

He is more of skincare type person. Similar to Seungjun, both of you cuddling with sheet masks on.

Yuto

The one who sticks to basic stuffs, skincare mostly

Also the type who will try to do makeup challenge diligently, asking you how should he do it rather than making a mess on your face.

The type that gives you thumbs up and affirming nods when you ask him how do you look.

He won't comment too much or nags/persuade you to stop doing heavy makeup eventually because he respects effort and confidence boost behind your makeup/high maintenance mentality

But he is flustered when you suddenly did a "I did a instagram summer gal makeup and show my bf" (for example) as it was way different and you look different. The moment you suggest to make this makeup theme as your usual, YUTO PANICKED, "Stop, stop, Mon sori yo? / What did you just say?"

IF you are office worker, he will nag at you if you are thinking straight to wear that makeup to office lol

The type that just quietly follows behind you when you are doing your shopping tour at Sephora or makeup shop.

But he will stop you if he sees your eyes gleaming as you stand at lipsticks corner lol (If you are the type who loves to collect and have too much lipsticks)

Occasionally surprise you with your fave lipstick color as well. Especially on early days of the relationship, you think he is the type that does not care. But turns out he is observant (because it is you so he is observant at your favorite stuffs)

Owh... i think he will be the perfume sensitive type person? He will mention what type of fragrance that he think you will go along well with.

Also I think the type who will recognizes if you changed perfume. Also the type who recognizes if you used his.

He might ask you to try on a sample and then you two might get a couple lover perfume/fragrance.

A/n : finally T^T this draft is in draft for like what... 6 months??? T^T

[tigerdrop]

Cringe is dead, talk to me about the funny half-life men and their relationship

okay here is my essay. it is titled These Guys Actually Like Each Other, and Gordon Freeman Is Just Kind Of A Dick*

(disclaimer: these are just my 2 cents. dont take me too seriously! im just some guy online who has watched this shit too many times.)

first things first. these guys actually like each other. this is a key aspect of their relationship. benrey, obviously and textually, digs gordon freeman - you dont flirt that heavily with guys you arent into, and so much of what he says and does is geared around making gordon crack up. thats pretty gay.

but the counterpart to this is that gordon freemans pretty fucking gay for benrey, too. you may say, “oh, but word of god says its not requited!” and to you i will say: bull shit. gordon is uniquely obsessed with benrey compared to all the other characters. if gordon didnt like the fucking guy, he wouldnt giggle with him and share in-jokes with him and bring him up every 5 seconds when benreys not around. thats concern, bro. thats worry. thats real shit

but i cant blame people for thinking that gordon freeman genuinely doesnt like benrey. benreys partially responsible for some of the worst things that have happened to him, the Arm Thing among them. and gordons very insistent afterward that he doesnt like benrey. he even goes so far as to try to kill benrey a couple times. to this, i must argue that gordon freeman is just kind of a dick.

lets talk facts here. canon. Lore. from the moment we hop into gordons shoes, we can see that he is a jerk to every npc on his way into black mesa. this is his default: a dude who just runs his mouth and says rude shit. he calls tommy a freak within 5 minutes of meeting him. he infantilizes the guy and barely considers him a real scientist. he doubts that bubby is a real name for like no fuckin reason. in “real life”, this is because its funny, and wayne is trying to make a funny half-life stream. in a textual sense, this is because gordon “hlvrai” freeman is a dick. this is the way he acts, consistently, throughout the series.

(brief aside: this is why the whole “gordon is a nice guy and a great dad” characterization baffles me. the way he actually acts in canon is, in short, bitchy and lacking in self-awareness. and i love that for him, i really do. it makes the moments where he just tries to be a nice guy stand out. but thats the thing: his intermittent moments of decency and kindness are not the whole of his personality! this dude kind of sucks most of the time!)

the way that gordons general asshole attitude extends to benrey is complicated. in fairness, benrey makes it his job to annoy the shit out of gordon as much as possible, and that warrants a negative attitude, but gordons pretty paranoid and ends up blaming benrey for nearly everything that happens to him, regardless of if its warranted. this is a pattern he exhibits both before and after the Arm Thing. its a little bit of a dick move! especially considering that, prior to the whole “betrayal” subplot (which was not exactly planned very far in advance), benrey is no more malicious or annoying than anybody else gordons having to travel with.

(okay, this is kind of a subjective evaluation, but still. my point stands that benrey is not any more of a hindrance to his progress than anybody else in the science crew, and neither is he particularly more violent or murderous. hell, gordon freeman has probably killed more guys than benrey. benrey just tends to get.......special treatment.)

all that said, i am still convinced that gordon really fucking likes benrey. please consider with me the following: it would be remarkably easy for gordon to just ignore him and do what he has to do, but he doesnt. he could stop engaging. he could stop thinking about benrey. he could stop bringing benrey up to the rest of the crew every time benrey leaves to do his own thing for awhile. but he doesnt. and, again, yeah, the extra-textual reason for this is “two guys are doing an improv comedy thing and bouncing off of scorpy is kind of the point”, but within the text it reads to me as gordon not being about to get the dude off his mind.

and this is in addition to all the times we see gordon being genuinely nice and receptive toward benrey! its in the little things: laughing the hardest and longest at benreys jokes. only ever reciprocating that stupid underwater “BBBBB” thing with benrey. trying to catch benrey when he falls, despite his insistence moments earlier that benrey should hop in the wack ass crystal generator and get hypermurdered. fondly remarking that benreys sweet voice sounds beautiful. his sort of flustered responses to most of benreys overt flirting. none of this is the way normal people react to a guy they hate. this is all fuckin gay to me, man.

its this combination of the outward insistence that gordon hates benrey with his inner eagerness to be around him and think about him and engage with him that gives off strong “repression” vibes, to me. for whatever reason - pride, embarrassment, resentment - gordon maintains a front of hating the guy and wanting to kill him for a lot of the series, but it doesnt gel with the way he fucking giggles and plays along half the time that benrey starts fucking with him. its a game, and that game is one of the only ways gordon knows to manifest affection for him.

(remember “oh my god, hes got a knife!”? that was the gayest shit i ever seen in my life. tittering like a schoolgirl while benrey chases him around like “im gonna get you haha”. insanity.)

the cool thing about repression is that you can have it manifest in a lot of ways! and this is where things like “headcanons” and “my own personal affection for repressed bisexual men” come in. a lot of how i characterize their relationship is an extrapolation of a lot of things like gordons canonical insecurity issues/anxiety, gordons whole anti-bootboy thing screaming “internet wokeboy who means well but probably has a lot of repressed baggage” to me, etc.

how do you get massive amounts of sexual repression out of what you see in canon, you might ask? well. if wayne would stop having gordon talking about being jerked off by the suit, or talking about chugging a 40-gal drum of potion and having to hold his piss, or worrying about being eaten by benrey the moment he sees benrey at setscale 10, maybe i would have a higher opinion of gordon “hlvrai” freeman and whatever latent psychosexual issues hes got going on. but here we are

i havent even touched yet upon how benrey feels about gordon. this one is helpfully made a little more plain by the fact that benrey very much wants to suck his dick in canon. (i dont even have to go into details. we all know.) but IMO the best part about this ship isnt just that they dig each other, but how. benrey gets overtly flirtatious in the second half of the series, but IMO his preferred method of flirting is just fucking with gordon: chasing him with knives, shoving him around in a bathroom, trying to get scans of his feet. but all in like a slapstick, giggly, fun-and-games sense, you know? at least when it works.

a lot of the time, though, it doesnt work out that way. he clearly just likes doing it whether or not gordon responds positively. which is, you know, Weird. not very nice. but also in line with the way everybody else treats gordon freeman. gordons kind of the universes chew toy in any given universe, and the same holds true here. hes kind of helpless......subjected to 4 demons attempting to make his life as difficult as possible. in a way its cathartic.

sorry. i got sidetracked. anyway, benrey very much likes to mess with him and unnerve him and demean him and i will be perfectly frank with you: that is hot. i have problems and illnesses and one of them is that i am a masochist who goes crazy for that kind of thing. calling gordon a “dirty lil boy” and telling him to “look at the mess [he] made” is some straight up kink scene shit.

i like to imagine that a lot of this behavior isnt caused just by the guy who played him wanting to be funny and antagonistic, but by benrey as a character not really understanding what constitutes “pushing a joke too far”. hes not human, and whatever he is doesnt have a very normative way of understanding the world around him, full of people who actually get hurt for real and die for real. benrey expresses what seems to be genuine surprise and distress after the Arm Thing, as if he didnt know that his actions would have serious consequences. and it doesnt seem to fully sink in afterward, either.

it reads a lot to me like hes used to video game rules and treating people around him like NPCs. if they get hurt, its no big deal, because its not real. he likes jamming random buttons on gordons interface and seeing what comes out. its probably a lot of fun for him, the same way that seeing a streamer or a youtuber suffer for our amusement is fun. its like, you know, in my opinion, gordons very cute when hes frazzled. hes also cute when hes laughing. pushing gordons buttons has a 50/50 chance of either of these things. and this is how he ultimately flirts with gordon: by pulling his pigtails.

but at the same time, benrey does legit care about gordon and knows some boundaries. benreys the one most often shooting at enemies to protect gordon, and he spent most of the last act trying to convince gordon to turn around and not fight him because they were friends (best friends, to be specific). he just lacks a lot of the emotional intelligence it would take to express the feeling of “he digs gordon and likes seeing his face get all red and sweaty regardless of the cause”. and gordon lacks the emotional intelligence it would take to express the fact that he doesnt know if he likes or hates benrey and hes scared as hell that its the former

because, lets be real. unironic benrey-liking is a sign of problems disorder. just look at all these words ive written about it.

can you imagine? this bizarrely powerful, non-human entity that can shrug off gunfire and grow to the size of a building has decided that youre his new plaything. benreys the bored guy booting up skyrim and fucking around in the console, and gordons the hapless favorite follower that hes taken a liking to. its a really fun dynamic IMO

after all this, its safe to say my title is a little misleading. the asterisk stands for * and So Is Benrey, Actually. they are both kind of awful dudes who thrive off of teasing each other and they deserve each other. and i am crazy about it. thank u for coming to my TED talk

[shadedrose01]

hey! I absolutely love your writing & I was just wondering if you could do something where peter & Harley are dating but Harley doesn’t post or comment about their relationship and peter gets really insecure thinking it’s cause he’s not good enough 🥺

Honey Lavender

Thanks for the prompt, anon! It's not exactly what you asked for (sorry!), but I hope it's still okay! I hope you, and everybody else enjoys!

Slight Trigger Warning: there are mentions of homophobia, but nothing shown :)

--

Peter drops his bags onto the guest bed, a cloud of dust puffing into the air and causing him to sneeze.

"Oh dear, we havent dusted this room in a while, I'm sorry love." Ms. Keener ("Call me Macy, dear, we're family!") apologizes, rubbing an arm over the bedsheets to collect any of the remaining dust bunnies still attached to the linen, pieces of her dark chestnut brown hair falling out of her bun and into her face.

Peter flails his arms a bit, trying to reassure her quickly. "No, no, it's okay, its perfect, thank you so much, Ms- Macy." He corrects himself as she sends him a playful glare over her shoulder.

"Miss Macy? That's a new one." Another voice pitches in from the doorframe, cheeky, Harley's thin but muscular body leaning against the wooden panels with a grin highlighting his dimples, his baby blues twinkling.

"Harley James Keener, you be nice now!" Macy chides, leaning closer to smack him upside the head, Harley ducking around her hand with a chuckle. Peter watches the scene with a small smile, with only grows as boyfriend comes to wrap his arms around his waist in a tight squeezed hug.

Peter was (finally) visiting Rose Hill for the first time, after over a year of him and Harley dating, and he couldn't be more excited. He was still battling jetlag, and reeling from all the distinct differences between Rose Hill and Queens ('There's barely any noise out here, no cars horns or people yelling or anything'), but he had always wanted to come, always wanted to meet Harley's family and see just how the southern belle of his had been raised. And just a few minutes in, after having reached the Keener farm and having met Macy and Abbie (a spitfire is the only way he could describe her, he loved her already), he was already learning so much more about the small town life, and about his boyfriend, things he didnt even think about, and he adored it. He loved it with every fiber of his being.

"Ma," Harley whined, plopping his chin onto Peter's shoulder and rocking them back and forth, causing Peter to giggle. "Don't embarass me!" His accent has grown thicker since he came home a few months ago, after staying with Tony for the summer months, and Peter couldnt help how much he loved it, couldnt help the shivers it caused, Harley sending him a knowing look, eyebrow raised. Peter flushes, knowing that's going to be brought up later, during a more personal time.

"Then don't be rude to Peter." She snarks, sending him a sly wink, which causes Harley to rolls his eyes and Peter to laugh. She makes her way towards the door, swaying her hips and humming under her breath, before she pauses to give them both a hard stare, her vibrant green hazel eyes narrowing slightly. "No funny business, you hear me?"

"Aye aye, captain." Harley salutes lazily, grinning as his mom huffs, the smile on her face betraying her true emotions, and walks out the rest of the way, closing the door most of the way on her way out, only leaving it open a crack.

As soon as his mother is out of sight, the old wooden stairs creaking signaling her departure downstairs, Harley grabs on to his hips and spins him around, pressing a kiss to his lips as soon as he can. It was the first time they've been alone together since Peter landed, so he wasnt surprised at the act, just wrapping his arms around Harley's neck, one hand gripping his back and the other running through his hair, pressing them a little closer together and pushing back into the kiss.

"Missed you," Harley mumbles against his lips, before pulling away, a softer, personal smile tilting his lips, his eyes bright like a hot summer's day. A thumb brushes the skin of his hip from under his shirt, small, soothing motions. "Missed you so much."

"I missed you too, baby. So so very much." Peter puts their foreheads together, and shuts his eyes, sighing constantly as they start to rock gently in their embrace, swaying back and forth to an unknown song, to the beat of their hearts and the rhythm of their souls, combined, intertwined.

They spin a few circles together in silence, just breathing each others air and feeling each others heat, being in the moment, before Harley puffs out a breath, and murmurs shakily. "Pete, there's something I gotta tell you."

He opens his eyes, lifting his head to look into Harley's now stormy ones, swirling and churning with a darkness, a sadness that has Peter's stomach twisting, his heart dropping. What happened? Did he do something? What did he do?

Harley goes to tell him, goes to speak when another feminine voice cuts them off from down the hall.

"Harls, your friends are here!" Abbey yells from what sounds like down the stairs, and Harley flinches back, the embrace and the moment broken.

He calls back a quick "Okay, coming!" Before giving Peter a plastic, shaky smile, eyes wide and panicked. "Come on, let's go say hi, I guess."

"Harley-" He doesnt get the words out as Harley grabs his hand and practically starts dragging him down the stairs, and Peter stifles an annoyed (and worried) sigh, knowing that his boyfriend is clearly not going to answer whatever the heck that was upstairs anymore, now that his friends were here.

Oh well. Time to try and make another good first impression.

They slide their shoes on before going out the white, metal swing door, and onto the painted wooden wrap around porch that encompasses the entire front of the Keener residence. Right in front of the doorway, on the dirt driveway, sits two different ATV's, their engines still humming as they sit in park, their riders still sitting on top, one with one person and the other with a passenger. The person right in the front, with a bright orange ATV, lifts up the visor of their helmet, revealing a boy not much younger than Harley, with shaggy brown hair, oval brown eyes and chubby freckled cheeks, pushed up by a smirk.

"Yo Harley, you comin' out?" The boy yells over the hum of the engine, his voice full of teasing, of mirth. He makes eye contact with Peter, whose interovertive instincts cause him to shrink a little under the gaze, and raises an eyebrow, looking shocked, surprised. "Whose that?"

Harley ignores the second question, looking away as he responds to the first with a shrug, "I can't tonight, EJ, sorry."

"Oh come on, Harls!" The passenger on the other ATV chimes in, a younger girl with curly ginger hair and green eyes, her arms wrapped around the driver. "You never come out anymore."

"And you never answered his question, dude." The driver chimes in, finally, the older man's deeper voice rumbling lower than the engine of the machine, his gray eyes harsh and cold, his lips tilted in a disapproving frown. He nods his head towards Peter, who is now standing dumbly at Harleys side, as he asks, "Who is he? Your boyfriend?"

There's something about the way the man spits out the word that causes a flair of fear, of bubbling anger to rise in his chest, and Peter opens his mouth to spit back, to say loud and proud that why yes, yes he is, when-

"What?" Harley sputters, laughing anxiously, the sound sounding all fake and wrong. "No, of course not! I'm not gay!"

And Peter's heart stops.

His head shoots over to stare at Harley with wide eyes and a gaping mouth, but Harley isnt looking his way, wont look his way, his eyes averted and looking anywhere else but him, and Peter's heart his crumbling, his lung tightening and his throat squeezing as tears fill his eyes.

...what?

"He's just a- a family friend, and I gotta say behind to watch 'em, you know how it is." Harley gazes straight forward as he says this, his voice unwavering, but monotone, obviously forced to Peter but apparently not to his friends as they all laugh and nod.

"Okay, good! You had us worried there for a sec." The boy, EJ, snickers, before putting his visor back down, revving his engine for seemingly no reason. "We'll see ya later?"

"Yeah! Cya!" Harley yells back as the engines roar back to life, the trio pulling out of the driveway and shooting off down the road again, the bright orange ATV doing a wheely on the way down.

Theres a few moments of nothing, a few shattered heartbeats where the two listens to the roars fade into the distance, before Peter cant stands it anymore, turning on foot and racing back into the house, hearing the metal swing door clanging against the frame of the house. Hearing Harley call out to him, and as his vision starts to blur, he moves faster, pushing past Abbie with a mumbled apology before rushing up the stairs, taking two at a time, and making it to the guest bedroom slamming door behind him, causing the wood to splinter slightly.

As soon as the door is shut and locked, tears pool out of his eyes as he breaks down, pressing a hand to his mouth to stifle his sobs as he sits on the dusty, creaking bed, curling into himself as he hears heavy footsteps coming up the stairs, and another lighter pair coming after that, hears Abbie mutter something jokingly and Harley hiss out a response before the knocking and pleading start.

"Pete? Please open up, I'm sorry, let me explain-"

"Explain what?" He tries to snap, tries to yell and bite and sneer, but it comes out as a sob, weak and shaky. "How you apparently aren't gay? How I'm a 'family friend'?" Peter whimpers into his hands, rubbing at his eyes to try and get rid of the frustrating tears pouring out of them. It's stupid, he was so, so stupid.

"No, Pete-" Theres a light thunk, like Harley leaned his forehead against the door with a little too much force. Theres a sigh, low and sad, before Harleys voice comes back, still pleading, but softer, full of sorrow, "It's- It's not like that-"

"Isnt it!? You don't want to tell them a-about me, I-I get it." He does, he really truly does. He's just boring old, useless, nobody Peter Parker, while Harley is... well, Harley. So he gets it. He just doesn't understand why it hurts so damn much.

"Peter-" Now, he sounds choked, like Peter's pain is starting to get to him too, like the heartbreak is contagious. "Please, baby, let me in. Let me explain, please. I promise you, it's not what you think."

Theres a pause, and Peter hates himself, hates himself for considering it, hates himself for getting up, hates himself himself for agreeing with it, unlocking the door and stepping back just in time for Harley to open it swiftly, looking frazzled, hair askew and eyes wide, teary, his cheeks wet.

Their eyes reconnect, Peter's spilling brown to Harley's ocean blues, and whatever look is on Peter's face causes Harleys to crumble, and rush out, "I want to tell them! A-about us, I do, god, I want to tell them so bad, Pete, but-" He sighs long and low, eyes falling downcast, head bowed in shame. "They're homophobic, Pete. Everyone in this town is." Peter's heart thumps painfully in his chest, and so many different questions swirl in his head, but he swallows them down, letting Harley continue, voice tight, fearful, shaky. "I got lucky with my mom, my sister, I thought they were gonna hate me too when I first came out, I was-" his breath hicks. "I was so ready for them to kick me out and not look twice, but they didnt, and I'm lucky, Peter, I'm lucky. If the town found out, they'd- they'd tell ma to bring to therapy, to Church, to fix me like I'm some broken toy." He spits it out, bitter, angry, and the fire and ache in Peter's chest is slowly receding, slowly fading the more Harley talks and the more he understands. Harley sighs again, and his shoulders slump, eyes growing misty. "I wish I could tell them about us, Pete, I really really do. I wish I could scream it from the rooftops how much I adore you, but I just-"

"Can't." Peter finishes, wiping the drying tears off of his cheeks.

"Yeah." He whispers, squeezing his eyes shut, a few trickles falling. "I'm sorry, baby. Im so sorry. I didn't want to say any of that. I didnt mean any of it. I'm sorry."

Peter glances up at him, sees the way Harley looks, with his hunched frame, head low, eyes shut, tears streaming down his red face, lips trembling, hands shaking, and makes a wounded noise at the back of his throat, taking a few steps forward and pulling the boy into a tight hug.

How was he supposed to stay mad at him when he looked like that? When everything is out of his control, when he's only doing what he has to for his safety, for his life.

Harley stiffens in his embrace, before slumping forward into him, grasping at the back of his hoodie and burying his wet face into the crook of Peter's neck, shivering with a sob. "Its okay," Peter whispers, kissing the side of his head and rocking them gently back and forth, just like they had done earlier, before this misunderstanding, before this mess. "It's okay. I'm sorry for misunderstanding."

Harley shakes his head, sniffling. "No, no, you didnt- didnt know. I'm sorry I said those things."

Now its Peter's turn to shake his head, pressing another kiss to his head, this time behind his ear. "Its *okay*," Peter reiterates, reassures, and Harley sighs, his warm breath puffing against Peter's chest.

"No it isn't." Harley responds remorseful, his grip tightening. "I shouldnt have to do this. I shouldn't have to pretend, to lie. But I have to. I'm going to continue to have to."

"I know," Peter murmurs, rubbing a firm hand up and down his trembling boyfriend's back. "I know. It's okay, I understand now. Understand that you don't mean it." He pauses, shutting his eyes and hooking his chin on Harleys shoulder. "You're right though. You shouldn't have to do this. And I'm so so sorry that you have to live like this, especially around your friends, but-" He pulls away, opens his eyes, and places a hand on each of Harley's freckled tear stained cheeks, looking dead in his azure, shining, red rimmed but still so beautiful, so so beautiful eyes, and tells him firmly, promising, "One day, I'm going to get you out of here, away from this town and it's people, and you'll never have to deal with this again. Okay?"

Harley's face crinkles again, but this time its with joy, with love, a smile growing on his face as more tears trickle down his cheeks. "Okay." He murmurs, soft, shaky, but honest, but true.

Things may not be perfect, but one day, Peter thinks as he pulls his boyfriend, the love of his life, his soulmate in for another big hug, one day, they will be. As long as he gets to stay by Harley's side, everything will be okay. He's sure of it.

[ace-pervert]

Ive finished watching eleven seasons of rupauls drag race and now feel I am ready to briefly review each season

S1: A good start though it must be said, ONGINA WAS ROBBED! Also there was favoritism.

S2: Not a bad season but at least somewhat ruined by Rupauls rather overt favoritism towards Tyra and dislike of Pandora. While I didnt like Tyra on the show his callout of the entire drag community after leaving drag has given me massive respect for him and feels like karma for RuPauls rather blatant self promotion and attempts to turn himself into some kind of rolemodel. But aside from the callout and Jujube, and Pandora the season is unmemorable.

S3: The top three were all highly skilled and the winner seemed to deserve it though that was later put into doubt after it came to light that Raja had worked with RuPaul before the show aired, and lets be honest Manilla Luzon was much more talented.

S4: One of the best seasons in drag race history, has the best music video, and Sharron Needles is hands down the most influential and versatile queen in drag race history. The only bad part, aside from the editing against phi phi, is Latrice Royal, who, and I feel this needs to be said, wouldnt have been in the top four had Willam stayed, and certainly wouldnt have made top five if Alaska had been allowed to join, mostly because she kept showing a similar outfit, her not being a particularly good actor, being thrown off really easily, and quickly relying on a shtick.

S5: Good season, but I feel that Roxxxy really did end up in the top three only because Visage and Ru love drama and the Jersey Shore look that was at the time Roxxxy Andrews trademark look, and the Coco Alyssa drama was really dull, neither deserved to be as high as ended up, and ultimately both queens are unmemorable.

S6: Not a bad season but i'm not a fan of Courtney Act or miss Lake, mostly because I think they both get away with looks that really they shouldnt have gotten away with, though arguable so did Bendelacreme. Though it was nice that there wasnt any drama, and Bianca del Rio is really funny.

S7: Ive tried to come up with words to describe this season, I cant, its just that bad. No not bad just dull, really dull and awkward, and the worst part is that its not the queens who drag the season down, the queens themselves are fine and Pearl stands out as being a particularly interresting person when not on drag race, its RuPaul being a tool off camera and coming up with challenges that play to the queens weaknesses rather strengths.

S8: Unfortunately I found Bob the Drag Queen so attractive out of drag that I stopped caring about what he looked like in drag with the end result being that I have no idea if hes a good drag queen. But ignoring the moments where I was drooling over Bob it was a good season with some truly great outfits,and a good Snatch Game, that wether for good or bad did very quickly become the Bob the drag queen and Kim Chi show, making it in hindsight the second most plann

S9: The season started off with an appearance by Lady Gaga , whose reviews of the outfits consisted of little more than name dropping and not much else, unintentionally setting the tone for a dull and awkward season with a cheerleading challenge that causes one person to crack a rib and another to almost permanently lose their ability to dance, a Reality Star Rusical that is well just dull, painfully bad lipsinks, uninterresting outfits, and perhaps the blandest wierd drag queen in the history of the competition. Its also in this season that introduced the lipsink for the crown format that I personally despise as it takes the power away from the viewers and puts it back in Rupauls hand.

S10: Solid season, mostly focused on returning contestant Eureka but the other contestants are given enough focus that it feels natural. The challenges are interresting to watch, the snatchgame is funny, and the dresses are well made. The top four are all stars in their right and the winner of that season could have easily been any of them, making this the only season where a lipsink for the crown made sense.

S11: Starts off strong with people like Miss Vanjie, Brooke Lynne Hytes, Nina West and Yvie Oddly revealing a high degree of skill both as actors and as dress makers. Unfortunately the blatant favoritism of Rupaul, the judges, and the producers towards Silky Nutmeg Ganache (honestly they seem like a nice person in real life, but on the show they just seem like a tool), unimaginative challenges, distracting and irritating cameos by former drag race contestants including by Bianca whos dull and unentertaining appearance shows exactly why contestants shouldnt return at all, a rusical so god cringeworthy you'll pray for death (Trump the Rusical), the worst snatch game in drag race history, and painfully predictable twists result in a terrible season, with the only interresting things being the romance between Vanjie and Brooke (they broke up four months after the last episode before the reunion due to conflicting schedules), Miss Vanjie being well himself, Nina Wests acting, and Yvie Oddly's outfits .

S12: Havent seen it, but lets be honest this season is the one where the star is a sex offender. By now many fans have analysed the season and its become clear that the person who was intended to be the focal point and possible winner was Sherry Pie, which means that editing them out for very well known reasons also makes them the focal point just in a different way than intended. Hell it wouldnt surprise me if this season becomes known as the one with Sherry Pie, not the one where the winner won. Though it might also be the last season that RuPauls on, as there are rumors that hes stopping with drag race.

The Christmass Special: To short for a christmass special, to much like the other episodes to be special, to blatantly commercial to be Christmass, and to scripted, even by drag race standards, to be drag race.

And now for a review of the Judges themselves

RuPaul: On the outside a warm, outspoken, well meaning person whose done things which are truly groundbreaking. But beneath that warm exterior beats the stone cold heart of a businessman. He's calculating, manipulative, greedy, has no qualms about setting queens up for failure, and ultimately hasnt done much that could be seen as groundbreaking. Perhaps the worst part is that its clear that in terms of humor , mentality and fashion hes never left the 70s, which combined with his callous way of treating the enviroment (as shown by his fracking empire) and his history of transpobia, makes him a liability to the show. Even if you manage to ignore all of that, the show is ultimately about the drag queens, not about Rupaul, and Rupauls attemps to make it about him really drag the show down

Michelle Visage: Shes a mother of two teenagers with a stay at home husband pretending to be a bitchy whore on a tv show about drag queens, yeah thats her career. Now in truth thats not the biggest issue, the biggest issue is that shes got hangups and makes the same jokes over over again and that after being on the show for ten years she hasnt developed as a judge so the routine, to paphrase miss Visage herself, has been done to death. In truth the show needs something other than the same damn shtick and same damn comments all the time, and if she cant do it then she should quite so someone else can do it for her. Ok maybe thats the second biggest issue, the biggest is that she kisses RuPaul's ass untill it shines brighter than a mirror.

Valentino Rice: Good judge, and had great chemistry with the other judges.

Ross Mathews: Cute guy, wierdly charming, and interacts well with the others.

Carson Kressley: He comes across as a very tired, very frail, very gay but very very very dull ninety year old man, which makes sense given the fact that his entire career is based on being gay, and hes, well old. Ok hes not really old, hes 50, but on camera he looks and acts closer to 150. And the issue isnt that hes gay, its that hes doing a shtick, a very dull and fairly offensive shtick. Possibly the worst choice for a judge, and the show jumps in quality whenever hes not there.

Now for a few things that just bug me.

Favoritism: Unfortunately one of the biggest issues of the show is that seasons tend to be structured around Queens who are intended to be the winner, or at least the hero, from the get go, which has the advantage of allowing the creators of the show to change the structure and challenges from season to season, but also makes it hard to watch if the season is blatant in its favoritism, if the intended winner isnt that good, or if the winner gets eliminated for one reason or another.

Cameos by former contestants: Cameos are a great way to get people to say "I know that person" which is great in a tv show because you know that the cast wont change in the next episode, but not great in a competition where all it does is take away screentime from competitors and giving it to competitors who most likely did not do well enough to win in their own drag race, and even if they did, the show is not about them, but about the current contestants. As such if Ru wants them to return he should put them in All Stars.

Cameos by celebrities: Add nothing. Its drag race not the red carpet, i'm watching for the up and coming drag queens not famous people trying to boost their careers.

Adding politics to the show: No, just no. Dont do things like Trump the Rusical, dont have steven colbert do a voiceover, theres no way that can go well and it comes accross as virtue signaling. If Ru wants to do something good he should double the prize money and have half of the money go to a charity of the winners choosing, or stop fracking.

Adding politics outside of the Show: Drag queens are celebrities and entertainers, as such are constantly in the public eye and dependent on being in it for their income which means that anything they say in public, wether its gossiping, or discussing politics, needs to be viewed as being some form of self promotion. Now this might make things difficult for them, but it is a well known part of being an entertainer so it can be assumed that they were well aware of this before they joined Drag Race. If they do want to talk about politics without being viewed as self promoting, they are free to make an anonymous account on one of the many sites, like tumblr, where its assumed that no one knows who the other people are.

Family Friendly Drag: Lets be honest its men shoving their cocks up their own asses while dressing up as women, and naking refferences to sex, for the sake of entertainment. Thers nothing family friendly about it. Nor should there be as part of the appeal of drag is that its something that is restricted to adults. Likewise they arent heroes, they are entertainers, not doctors, not construction workers, entertainers no more worthy of praise then a person on a sitcom.

Drama outside of Drag Race: While drama on the show is to be expected and is part of what makes it entertaining, drama outside of the show is different its more personal and something that in truth should not be shared. However by presenting it as gossip on various shows they are saying its part of the show, which is unhealthy at best.

Final note.

While I am critising the Drag Race, I am not doing it because I dislike the show, I am infact a big fan of the show but at the same time I want to get my thoughts out there see how others view these topics.

[iwannawritepls]

Writing Update 05

Guess who finished. guess. go on guess. That’s right it was me!!

It was pretty intense because my playlist had finished and so I was sat feverishly typing the last paragraph out in silence and then when I went round for the final spell check I was listening to Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths and it finished as I finished and it was a moment.

So so so. in total we have

69069 words (nice) and 102 pages spread over 23 chapters and 5 parts. I can actually go into the plot and stuff now too because I know what that is from start to finish. I won’t go into that here I’ll just talk about the last chapters. Buckle up this ones gonna be long.

Whence last we left off there were 17 chapters and now there’s twenty-three. Chapter seventeen also has an actual name too so yay.

Chapter 17 – Pinches of Catgut

Chapter 18 – Yours Forever, Echo

Chapter 19 – Ink’s Tarnish

Chapter 20 – Red Room

Chapter 21 – Crosshatched Scars

Chapter 22 – Chasing Sundust

Chapter 23 – Amen

Chapter 17 originally is now what chapter 18 and chapter 23 isn’t really an epilogue but it also is y’know? Like the last two chapters are the endings in their own right (I say as if I didn’t stop reading The Darkest Minds seven pages from the end)

But c’est la vie!

Chapter 16 (I can finally explain this stuff woo) we had the fallout to the guy’s being told they have to pay the devil – who isn’t really the devil and is actually a god in his own right but that’s beside the point – back for everything he’s done for them. this one focuses on Valentine and Albert having a bit of a moment where I realised ‘oh gosh everyone is a foil to everyone oh gosh’

Chapter 17 is kinda the same but from William and Basil’s side where they have their own conversation about who Will killed Charlie by accident….yeah…William is still baby he just killed someone that’s fine. This is fine.

Chapter 18 is where shit hits the fan because oh my god James is back!!!!! Idk if I mentioned this but James is Enoch’s dead bf who wasn’t dead at all and I’ve been hinting at it the entre god damned book. I almost didn’t include it but after a talk with one of my friends I realised that James’ being alive would bring in more tea than ever before and well,,,,,,why wouldn’t I?

Oh yeah James also tells Enoch that everyone is coming to find them.

The way I'm explaining this seems like stuff just happens, but I swear I do add threads throughout! I'm just disjointed in my thought process.

Chapter 19 is the beginning of the end. We have a rush to pack as they’re trying to get out and they would have more help from James but Basil doesn’t trust James, Enoch is drunk, William has lost a lot of blood and both Al and Valentine had been asleep so they’re slow and groggy and it’s raining because England and winter and the coast is just a great combination.

Enoch and James end up going ahead cus people are getting close and they need to get their stuff away from there. There were three cases left to tie but they didn’t have time so while James and Enoch go ahead the others are carrying the last three cases to the docks so they can tie and run.

Chapter 20 is where Enoch wraps his beef with Aristide up. kinda. He originally planned on just saying goodbye but then stuff happens and he feels bad for Aristide so he just gives him to the devil without the murder part of it.

Chapter 21 valentine kills his uncle and gets closure™

Chapter 22 this chapter is so good. I love it, I love it so much. I'm still kinda feeling funky about it because its got a flashback and the rest of the book hasn’t got anything exactly like this – unless you consider the small titbit in chapter 17 a flashback. But I really delve into Sebastian’s psyche and before then I kinda hated Sebastian but it feels like he's had a whole ass character arch and I love it. I really love this chapter so much.

And finally chapter 23 is them running and the last of the setup for the next book

I want to include memes but they’re all old stuff. If I have anything new, I’ll insert it if not I’ll keep 5 random facts about the boy’s as my transition.

Albert

When he was a bab he wanted to meet keats before he realised the mans is dead.

Can write in shorthand in both Russian and English just so long as he doesn’t focus too hard on it

Albert is his middle name, Lyonya is his first name

Is a cat person.

Orders the same meal at every restaurant even if they don’t serve it. if they don’t serve it he has a tiny crisis.

Also defo has one of the others order for him

Basil

Defo a gifted and talented student if he was alive today

He's technically an accountant and low key enjoys it

Can fight but is a pacifist by choice

Skipped class once and got bored and never did it again

When they were still at school he would look after the groups deeds to land and do all the legal stuff for them because they had no clue. He still has all of Valentine’s papers and so could technically steal valentines land and nobody would care.

Enoch

Isn’t gay is actually bisexual

Is really good at science but just doesn’t care about it

He ate leek and potato soup exclusively for three weeks on a dare

Once played Mercutio and tripped on stage. Managed to hide it pretty well but hasn’t lived it down.

Would live in an old theatre if he could just for the aesthetic and bragging rights

Valentine

His family is of German heritage

Bakes as a stress relief but gets hyper focused on one thing for ages (tarts is the big one of the year)

Is the mum of the group but wouldn’t ever admit it

Cannot do maths for shit. or much else. He can just speak a lot and paint.

It’s a continuous joke irl and in novel universe that he’s called Valentine, but his birthday is on February 15th because his parents thought it was still February 14th when he was born.

William

Allergic to honey but would eat it anyway

Joined classes three years after everyone else

Is the only one in the group that understands people

Has a really bad centre of gravity and falls over a lot

He's 6’7

Bonus – a wild Sebastian appeared.

Acts 50 is 20

Is just brine

In a constant state of identity crisis

Was he born or did he just appear fully formed? Nobody knows

Always stuck as Benvolio. No matter what. forever. He hates it.

Excerpts! –

“you are a walking disaster.” Basil sighed

“I'm your favourite disaster though.” He could hear the smile in Enoch’s voice.

I just like these lines. Nothing too deep just thought they were funny.

Basil placed a hand on his knee hoping the rain could drown out what the music that followed William could not.

My mans being a supportive friend

He finished pulling the manuscript together and reached for the box Albert kept all his current writings in. it was a small box with darker patches between the broken veins where ink had spit and flowed between the cracks.

i have nothing to say about this 

They only had real tenderness with some of the fragile things. A school given copy of A Midsummer Night's Dream, a book by a man called Sashenka Potemkin, teacups with still blooming meadows painted onto them, a book about a monastery, a violin case that had nail marks embedded into the leather, an easel.

Y’know keepsakes are Important but if you’re running shouldn’t you pack light? Probably but these guys are sentimental bastards

The shops were alive with people, the two pubs were open and selling even the tailoress was in business. He wasn’t entirely surprised; worms came out during a storm. They thrived when the squawking of the gulls had disappeared.

We live in a society – Enoch 2019

The gate yielded under his hand, the closest he got to acceptance in the high walls. It seemed colder once he’d walked into the threshold, urging him towards the sickening feeling of unbelonging that sat in his gut. It made him want to turn away and never come back some of the time. How much he didn’t belong there.

Sebastian is yearning™

Basil reached into Albert’s pocket and pulled the crocus out. Albert didn’t react as he did so. he stared at it twirling it between his fingers staring at the petals and their untarnished glory despite having been used to kill them all at least once.

And while that isn’t the last line that’s the end of this. I'm taking a break from beginning anything big and while I want to move onto writing Adalius, Ariane and Adionis’ story I’ll wait for a moment before I do. just because I cant bring myself to think about how I'm starting this yet.

Anyway. That means no updates for at least 3 weeks. I know you’re all distraught. But yeah.

I hope you have a good day.

Thanks for reading this!

BYEEE!

[daysswithyou]

V. Sungjin - Bet

Characters: Sungjin x You

Genre: enemies to lovers!6

Warning: some cursing and swearing

Credits: @7abshy and @parkjaeins; for helping me figure out how annoying teachers can be

Words: 5k

Description: There is always more than meets the eye

Author’s note: This wraps up the enemies to lovers!6 series :) I hope you’ve enjoyed all 5 of them! 

-----

I’m late, I’m late, I’m late, shit!

You repeatedly mouthed the words to yourself under your breath as you squeezed past the throng of people crowding the hallways, occasionally throwing an apology across your shoulder if you bumped into someone. Opting to not take the front entrance into the lecture hall, you ran up flights of stairs to reach the back entrance. By the time you reached the top, you were gasping for breath, your thighs were burning and you could feel the first beads of sweat roll down your back. Slipping through the crack of the heavy wooden door, you settled into the closest empty seat, trying to steady your breathing as your pants became too loud within the enclosed space.

Deep breaths Y/N, deep breaths...

You internally heaved a sigh of relief when you saw the empty podium in front, glad that your professor for this class will not have a bad impression of you.

But your relief was short-lived as the booming voice right next to you soon commanded for attention.

“Alright let’s get started, now that the last student is here.”

As he walks down the flight of stairs to reach the podium, it gives you enough time to observe the authoritative figure. His black leather jacket and ripped black jeans made him look exceptionally tough, and you swore you saw some male students flinch when he walked past them. His hair, which was the colour of warm chocolate, was too long and brushed against his eyelids.

He looks like a model that has just stepped out of a Harley Davidson advertisement.

But you mentally berated yourself for the inappropriate thought, and proceeded to haul it out of the window.

When he stepped onto the podium, he surveyed the whole room before starting again.

 “Good morning. My name is Park Sungjin and I’ll be your TA for this semester and for this class.”

 Ah, so this was the legendary Park Sungjin that you had heard so much about during your first semester. He was famous for being the top student of the graduating batch, with an impeccable portfolio to match. Apparently, he’s so good to the point that many companies and graduate schools have offered him a place amongst them. But, he is also notorious for being a tough TA and everyone’s advice was to just stay away from his bad side if you ever had the fortune (or misfortune) of being in his classes.

All you wanted was to pass this class peacefully so you made it your goal to not cross the line.

However, when he opens his mouth to give the next set of instructions, you knew that you were already on the wrong side of the line.

“So now, if you’re ready Ms Y/N, I’ll begin with the introduction on the topic.” Giving you one last hard glance, he turned to face the screen. Everyone else was furiously copying down notes, but not you.

He said my name, he knows who I am. I’ve been singled out.

It felt like someone had just passed you the death sentence.

-

A week passed by uneventfully and you tried your best to not attract attention to yourself in class. You were on time, and you were attentive in class. You never gave Sungjin trouble – or Mr Park, as you know him by now. Yet, such tactics did not work on him. You knew that you had his full attention when he stares at you from the front as he is giving lectures, even if you’re sitting in a last row. He’ll always linger a little longer behind you as write answers to the mini quizzes in class. You made the mistake of looking up at him once, and you nearly combusted under his hard gaze. What’s worse is that you can’t decide if he approves or disapproves of your work. Perhaps that was the most agonising part.

Today was no different. After handing up your papers for the quiz to the front, you attempted to slip away with the crowd but you just couldn’t slip past Park Sungjin’s attention.

“Y/N, could I have a word with you?”

You halted in your steps, his monotone voice sending chills down your spine.

Why me…

Squeezing your eyes shut and taking in a shaky breath, you turned around to face him before walking in his direction. Your steps were a little too hesitant and you were obviously clutching onto your bag too tightly because this was the first thing that Sungjin said when you finally stood in front of him.

“You can loosen your grip on your bag strap, your knuckles are turning white.”

“O-o-oh. It’s a habit, sorry.”

“What time do your lessons end today, Y/N?”

“6pm. My last lesson is Introduction to Psychology.”

“Good. Meet me at Conference Room 2 of the Social Sciences block, 6.30pm sharp.”

“Yes. Anything else…?”

“That’s all. You may go now.”

Giving Sungjin a curt bow, you scurried out of the lecture hall as fast as you could, dreading the time when you had to see him again.

 6.30pm came too early for your liking, and you soon found yourself face to face with Sungjin once more. A thick stack of papers were sitting by the corner of the table beside him and you knew immediately.

“I’m here to grade papers?”

“More or less; I’ll be giving the final grade and you can help me critique.”

You simply nodded before assuming the seat in front of him.

The next time you looked up, your neck popped up with a loud crack and the clock read 12am. Sungjin kept you thoroughly occupied for the past few hours, papers being presented to you in a systematic manner. You’ve said more words to him a few hours than you’ve said to all your professors combined last semester. While disguised as ‘extra exposure’ for you, deep down you knew that this was Sungjin’s special torture method – and you finally understood what others meant by getting on his bad side.

But the torture didn’t end there.

“Y/N, don’t forget that we have an assignment due the next day. Oh, and don’t be late. See you tomorrow.”

Everything sounds really innocent but you knew what Sungjin really meant was “Don’t mess up tomorrow Y/N.”

You wanted to let out a sigh of frustration but instead you swallowed it and merely replied with a spritely “Yes” before leaving the office.

 -

And this went on for months. Every single time Sungjin gave your class a quiz, you would find yourself in the conference room with him grading papers; sometimes at the expense of your own work. It gradually extended to grading papers from his other classes, but never once did you complain. You knew better than to argue with teachers, much less Sungjin. Every time he looks at you, your words die in your throat; how on earth were you supposed to hold an argument with him? But, of course, when you were back in the comfort of your dorm, which was when you were cursing and swearing at him. At one point in time, your roommate almost called an exorcist, thoroughly freaked out by the way you were flaying your limbs in the air as you continued screaming in frustration.

Needless to say, the late nights left with less sleep, and little energy to pay attention. You were up till 4am last night (or should you say morning), rushing out assignments due today for 2 different classes. You had burst into Sungjin’s lecture hall a good 20 minutes late but in your state, you didn’t care anymore. As usual, you settled into the closest seat you could find, one hand combing through the tangles in your hair, the other rummaging through your bag for your lesson materials. But you were so thoroughly exhausted that you fell asleep 10 minutes later, you pen stopping midway across your paper.

The next time you regain consciousness was when Sungjin’s voice calling your name rang through the speakers.

“So, Ms Y/N, what do you think of the question I just raised?”

You awoke with a start and you scattered your stationary across the floor in the process. You could hear the whole hall snickering at your blunder; save for the few kids sitting around you that helped you pick up your stray pens.

What was the question even? That was the most urgent question for you to answer. You shot a hard look at Sungjin, one that said, “How dare you call me when I’m in this state because of YOU.”

You were sure that he understood your gaze, but he merely raised an eyebrow, as he always did. It was the one that you recognised as “Go on, I’m waiting for your answer.” You knew that there was no way out of this except to answer his question. Panicking, you stared at the last word you wrote in your notebook before rattling off.

“The most famous poem from the Old English period, widely recognised by most is Beowulf. And for – ”

“Oh Ms Y/N, I didn’t know that Scandinavians spoke Old English in the late 10th century. Clearly, someone needs to keep her eyes and ears open. Also, I asked for your opinion, not of those from the 10th century.”

From beneath his long locks, Sungjin gave you a mischievous glint and smirked at you as the entire hall erupted into raucous laughter. Everyone was laughing, except you. Everyone found this funny, except you. Everyone was in a good mood, but you were livid.

How.fucking.dare.you.Park.fucking.Sungjin. I’m suffering in class now because of all your stupid “extra exposure” work after school. Yet you purposely picked on me to answer your question, knowing full well that I can’t. Why do you like picking on me so much? Why do you like embarrassing me in class so much? WHY PARK SUNGJIN!!!

You might have felt better if you actually said it out loud, but you didn’t. You just kept repeating this thought to yourself like a mantra until the end of the lesson.

It’s ok Y/N, just another 30mins of sitting in this hall and looking at his face. Afterwards you can leave and get yourself some ice cream to make yourself feel better. Yes, that’s right… everything is going to be ok Y/N...

But that day, things were not ok and you left the hall in a foul mood. For the final project of the year, you were paired up with Song Jihyo, the girl in class that was notorious for not doing her work.

Its official, Park Sungjin hates me and wants me to burn in Hell. That day, your whole body ached at the thought of more late nights and instead of eating your ice cream, you remembered hurling it at an innocent, nearby tree.

-

Everything that you thought would happen did happen. It’s as the saying goes, “Everything that can go wrong will go wrong.” And in this case, you were helpless against its happening. The only time that you talked to Jihyo was deciding on the thesis and after that, she was virtually uncontactable. You eventually gave up trying to arrange a time to meet to do up the thesis; you merely assigned her parts – which, to be fair, she did do. But they were of such poor quality you ended up deleting most of it and redoing it yourself. But no matter how hard you tried, nothing seemed fresh and you decided to bite the bullet and ask for help.

Lucky for you, Mr Kim was in class today and you immediately ran to him for help.

“Good morning Mr Kim. I have some questions about the final project thesis, is it alright if I ask a few questions?”

“Ah Y/N aren’t you? I’ve heard so much about you from Sungjin! I’ll be glad to help, let me take a look.”

Eagerly, you showed him what you had done so far and when he smiled, you felt a small smile creep onto your face, silently happy that you had gained his approval. But soon, the smile was wiped off your face.

“First of all, an excellent thesis choice, I must say. I remember Sungjin doing something similar for my class 3 years ago, why don’t you ask him for help? He is in a better position to help than I am.”

“Yes sir, I’ll ask Sung- I mean, Mr Park. Yes, I’ll ask Mr Park for advice. Thank you.”

With a light pat on your shoulder, he left you alone and when you turned, you found Park Sungjin standing right in front of you.

“I heard you need help?”

“Yes...” You hated it; you hated having to admit that you needed help from Park Sungjin.

“Hand it over.”

Reluctantly, you passed him your phone and turned to the side, not wanting to see his face further.

When he finally passed back the phone to you, you didn’t feel any more enlightened.

“You can do better than this.”

“What do you mean? That isn’t helpful!”

“That’s all I have to say. You know what to do, so do it.”

“I don’t! I don’t know what to do, which is why I’m asking for help!”

“Then sit down and figure it out.”

So that’s how it’s going to be – you won’t give me a consultation when I need it the most. Fine.

But that was not what you said. You said this instead, “Ok, I’ll figure it out.”

From then onwards, without help from anyone, you trudged through the group thesis yourself. This was on top of the individual thesis that each of you had to prepare for. You were literally typing so much (or rather, punching) your keyboard so hard that one of the keys fell out and you had to send your laptop for repairs. Not only was school draining your sanity, it was also draining your money. Due to the delay in repairing your laptop, you were left with a week to finish half of your thesis.

The outcome: later nights and heavier eye bags. By now, you were too tired to curse and swear at Sungjin for the terrible grouping since it was already taking insane willpower from you to even show up in class. You merely bottled up your indignation, and kept working to avoid thinking about it. After placing the stack of papers in Sungjin’s letter tray, you went back to your dorm and crashed for 12 hours straight.

This signalled the start of your 1 week break, and one week of not seeing Park Sungjin.

Thank goodness.

-

The next time you saw Park Sungjin, you were glad that it was the last time that you would have to see him. After all the torture he had put you through for the past semester, you were glad that you’ll be done with him now.

Yet, as always, Park Sungjin manages to make your life a living hell till the end.

Group Thesis: C

Individual Thesis: E

Overall: D

Comments for Individual Thesis: Clear presentation of key ideas and mostly factually correct. Choice of thesis could be better.

Signed: Park Sungjin

Choice of thesis could be better. Park Sungjin failed me, just because he didn’t like my topic.

You were brought out from your shock by a large shove from behind. Whipping around, you found a smiley Jihyo in front of you and her next words made you want to punch her in her perfect little teeth.

“Thank you for helping me pass the class Y/N! How much did you get?”

Without your consent, she ripped your papers from your hands before handing them back to you with a frown.

“That’s odd; we had the same choice of individual thesis, why did you do worse?” But Jihyo had no time to contemplate on the answer to her question when she was dragged away by her friends to celebrate their good grades.

I can tolerate everything that Park Sungjin has put me through, but not this.

Running up to Sungjin, you stopped him from leaving before asking to see him.

“Do you have time now?”

“Yes. What is this about?”

“This is about my thesis, can we talk somewhere else?”

“Conference Room 2 of the Social Sciences building in 10 minutes, I need to talk to Mr Kim first.”

“Ok.”

You were going to clear this once and for all.

-

“So, what is it about your thesis, Y/N?”

“You failed me just because you didn’t like my topic, didn’t you?”

You’ve rehearsed this part many times in your head and this wasn’t how it was supposed to sound like. It was supposed to sound polite and less accusatory, but fuck that. You wanted answers, and if you had to demand it from him, you will.

“Yes, I did. What’s the issue with it?”

“It’s not fair.”

“Nothing is fair in this world Y/N; I thought you’d know that by now.”

“Yes, I do know that. But what you’re doing is not only unfair, but also downright discriminatory.”

“How so?”

“Jihyo told me that we both had the same choice of thesis, and I got and E and she got a B. My grades are clearly a personal attack against my character. You never liked me from the start, I get it. But it’s wrong to simply disregard my entire thesis because you didn’t like the topic! What is wrong with this topic? It’s within the list of topics that you’ve given us, I met the word count, I met deadlines. I did everything!”

“And I’m supposed to give you a A for that?”

"I’m not saying you have to give me an A for it. I'm just trying to prove the fact that – " "A fact is already a fact, you don't have to prove it." "God damn it Sungjin! Would you just lay off me for a second? Would it kill for you to not correct my grammar for once? Would it kill you to not pick on me for one second?" "It's Mr Park, for you. It still is. And no, I won't lay off your grammar – you are an English language major that has taken my class, there is no way that I'm allowing you to continue to speak with bad grammar." "I hate you." "That can technically count as swearing at a teacher. Are you testing my patience?" "No. I'm just saying that it's not fair for you to give me a bad grade just because you did not like my choice of thesis. That's just being biased." "I'm not changing your grade." "I can't fail this module Sungjin! I need to pass this module to go for the Advanced English module. Yes, it's not a perfect thesis but I don't deserve to fail for this!" "Welcome to the real world Y/N." "I hate you Sungjin. I really fucking do." You pick up your bag and slam the door on your way out. That night, for the first time, you cried. And you hated the fact that you were crying over stupid Park Sungjin.

-

The next day, you awoke with puffy eyes but nonetheless, you showed up for lessons. You nearly bumped into Sungjin on your way to Psychology but you immediately detoured. You couldn’t get close to him – you might just punch him and be charged for assaulting a teacher.

That evening, you had just ended lessons when your phone buzzed and Sungjin’s name lit up on your screen.

Mr Park: You have another chance to redo your thesis and not fail the class. Deadline is January 20th, 2 weeks from now. Papers in my tray at 6pm sharp; don’t be late for the submission.

You swiped his notification away quickly, but you remembered the words and that night, you began sourcing for more ideas for your individual thesis.

For the next 3 days, Sungjin just wouldn’t leave you alone. Your phone buzzed with his name every now and then, and he was so distracting that you nearly wanted to block his number.

Mr Park: Are you going to resubmit your thesis?

Mr Park: Have you chosen a thesis yet?

Mr Park: What is your choice of thesis? How many words in?

Mr Park: Do you need help? Just drop me a message; I can help you check your thesis.

Help me with my thesis? Is he playing saint now? As if I’m going to accept help from him.

As you turned your attention back to your screen, you found that a shadow has fallen in front of your laptop. You found yourself staring at a pair of familiar, battered, black Converse and looking up only confirmed your suspicions. The man was here in person – Park Sungjin.

“Why aren’t you replying my messages?”

Why must I hold myself accountable to you? Buzz off.

You continued typing, completely ignoring Sungjin. You heard him sigh before inviting himself to sit in front of you.

“Y/N, what is your thesis? Hey, answer me. I came all the way down here to find you.”

“You came here voluntarily, I didn’t ask for your help. You can leave.”

“You’re still angry at me?”

Of course I am, you asshole. You’re just asking the obvious.

With each thought, you punched the keys on your keyboard harder.

“Stop typing so hard, you’ll spoil your keyboard. Working in spite is not going to produce quality work Y/N.”

Without your consent, he lifted your laptop into the air and onto his lap and scrolled through your entire document for 15 minutes. Passing it back to you with a smile, you stared at him in shock for 5 minutes.

Park Sungjin never smiles; did he just smile at me?

“You did it.”

“What did I do?”

“You figured it out. This was the choice of thesis I wanted you to choose in the very first place. Furthermore, you’ve chosen the correct area to focus on.”

“Thank you… I thought…”

“What did you think about?”

“I thought I might not be on the right track. But your words makes me feel a little more reassured now.”

“Well, I’ll leave you alone now.”

Park Sungjin then took his leave, but he was lying when he said he’ll leave you alone. He never did. Till the submission deadline, he visited you every alternate day.

As expected, you got an A for your individual thesis.

-

When you got an email from Mr Kim saying that he wanted to meet you, you thought you were doomed; most likely a disciplinary case on your head after what you said to Sungjin. But turns out, it was an interview for the Advanced English course, and they passed you immediately. When you walked out of the room still stunned that that you had entered the course of your choice, you found Sungjin waiting outside for you, almost like he knew you were going to be there.

“They passed you didn’t they?”

“Huh?”

Hearing his voice reminded you of what Mr.Kim said to you just now:

“We’ve received high commendations of you, Ms Y/N. All the professors pushed for your recommendation into the course, and Sungjin, especially. He was the first one to mention offering you a place in the course. He spoke of your remarkable working attitude.”

“May I ask something?”

“Yes, anything at all.”

“What exactly did Mr Park say about me?”

“He mentioned that you work well even under immense stress and long hours, catching up really fast even if you fell behind. But, most importantly, he spoke of your willingness to try again after failure. That is the most important quality that we are looking out for: tenacity. We have no doubt that you’ll be a suitable candidate to enter this demanding course. We would love to offer you a place, should you choose to accept.”

“I would love to, thank you. Thank you to the faculty and professors for having me.”

Sungjin hates me, why would be recommend me for the course?

“Follow me.”

Taking him by the wrist, you dragged Sungjin all the way to the bridge in the school park before letting him go.

“What’s with the rush, Y/N?”

Hands on your hips, you turned to face Sungjin with wide eyes, your lips set firmly in a thin line.

“I don’t understand you Sungjin. First, you torture me in lessons by making me so many extra work and now you’re putting in good words for me and recommending me for my dream course? Did you suddenly decide that you like me more now overnight?”

“Ah, so they told you everything I said. Mr Kim promised to not tell, I should have known he wouldn’t keep to it.”

“You’re still not answering my questions.”

“I’m getting there. First of all, that extra work was not torture, they were a test. I loaded you with many things to see how much you can handle before you snapped but thankfully and luckily for me, you never did.”

“I did silently curse and swear at you.”

“That is a given. But you didn’t say it out loud, so it doesn’t count. You’ve proven to – ”

“To be able to work well under immense pressure and long hours.”

“Yes. That is an important quality for taking any Advanced courses. I took the same course with the same professors that you’ll be having so I know how intense it was. I had to put you under pressure to see if my bet was correct.”

“I was your bet?”

“Yes, I was betting on you all along. You have great potential.”

“Thank you.”

“Oh? I thought someone hated me before.”

“Like you said, that was before. I don’t anymore. What you put me through was tough, but they did teach me more about myself and my limits. So, thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now that I’ve managed to help you get a place in your course, I think it’s time to return the favour?”

“What’s your proposal?”

“Come to my graduation ceremony next spring. It’s in April.”

“Ok. That’s all?”

“That’s all for now.”

But when a soft smile lights up Sungjin’s face, you knew there was more in store for the both of you in time to come.

-

April 20th

You had come early to get front row seats and as you watch Sungjin give a speech representing the graduating batch, your heart swells with pride. You’ve seen him work very hard for the past one semester and to see him being handed his graduation certificate made you feel like all his efforts paid off.

You were the last to greet Sungjin because there was simply too many people crowding around him. You watch from afar and you giggle when you see Sungjin frantically asking Kang Younghyun if he’s seen you around. He does this thing where his eyes grow big like saucers, so big that you thought they were going to pop out of their sockets. You could also hear the fear in his voice – he speaks a little faster and slips into the Busan dialect. So when you greet him by gently tapping him on the shoulder, he whips around so fast the wind nearly knocked you over. But when you see his facial expression melt from one of worry into one of happiness, you nearly melt into a puddle there and then. You’d given anything to see those sparkly eyes and sweet smile.

“Ah finally you’re here Y/N! I saw you in the front row just now but then afterwards I didn’t so I was worried that you left but I haven’t got a photo with you yet. I was so sad  because I haven’t asked you my question yet – ”

“Calm down Sungjin! I’m here now right? Also, happy graduation! I got this for you.”

Proudly, you hold up the bear plushie you had custom made for him, decked out in the exact same graduation gown that he had on right now.

“It looks like you, right? I named him Bang!”

“Why Bang?”

“Because you always say goodbye in a very cute manner and Bang seems like a cute name to capture that cuteness. Also, I gave him eyelashes! When you observe the details, he really looks like you right?”

When Sungjin finally notices the eyelashes, he bursts out laughing and you swore your heart nearly stopped. When he finally stopped laughing and took over the bear from you, he finally remembered the question he wanted to ask you.

“Y/N- ah…”

“Yes?”

“If I ask you out…will you say yes?”

Just to tease him a little, you decided to look up at the sky, and contemplate your answer for a little while.

“I don’t know…maybe?”

“You can’t do this to me! I waited so long to ask you this question!”

“Why did you wait so long then?”

“I had to wait till I graduated. It wouldn’t be right for a teacher to ask his student out right?”

“That’s true…but I still don’t know if I’d go out with you. How about we make a bet?”

“With what?”

“With a coin. You flip a coin and I’ll decide. Which side are you confident of getting?”

“Heads, I always flip a head.”

“Ok, go ahead then. Heads for I’ll go out with Park Sungjin and tails for…”

With utmost concentration, Sungjin flips the coin and slams his palm over it when it lands. Opening his palm, his face immediately becomes crestfallen: staring back at him was a tail.

But you haven’t finished your sentence yet.

“Tails for…I’ll still go out with you anyways!” you said, as you gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

“Really? You would?”

“Ask any more questions and I’ll reconsider.”

“Ok, ok I won’t ask any more questions! What do you want to eat?”

“Fried chicken!”

“Oh, I was betting that you’ll say fried chicken!”

“Betting on fried chicken is great Park Sungjin, but I'm betting on something else now.”

Sungjin turns to look at you and he says, "So, what are you betting on now?"

"I'm betting that you'll give me a kiss."

"Really? How are you so sure?"

"I know you Park Sungjin, I know you'll do it. So, am I getting a kiss or not?" 

Without another word, Sungjin closes the space between the both of you, so close that if either moved, your lips would touch. You closed your eyes and waited for the impact, but instead you felt something soft press into your forehead and you immediately smiled. 

"Not where I was expecting, but ok Sungjin."

"I'm saving the best for the last."

"I'm holding you accountable for that statement."

"You can bet your life on it that I'll fulfill it."

Not only was he your best bet, he was your favourite bet too.

[elliotthezubat]

HALLOWEEN DANCE RP ACT 80

TW for implied abortion mention

from new members of the agency, to fiery ladies, to dating sim antics

[[cont from part 79]

Assi: A~A "M-M-Mo-Mo-Mono?" mono: what? Assi: "D-Do you like parties?" mono: i guess. why? Assi: "M-My boss, Mr. Fitzgerald--the man who gave you that large tip and has been so kind to you at Deathbucks--is having a party tomorrow night..." mono: and? Assi: "A-And would you like to go? It's free? Lots of food...Fancy food. Chocolate fountain..." mono: ...eh, sure. Assi: *shiny eyes* "Yay! The party starts at 7--meet here at 6:30?" mana: isnt it tomorrow? Assi: "R-Right--6:30 tomorrow..." -elsewhere- higuchi: mmm.... =////T Gin: *lick* higuchi: *shivers* f-fuck... Gin: *passes her tongue past her lips, gripping her hips* higuchi: ah! *her hips jerk up* d-dont stop. Gin: *her lip along Higuchi's nub, her tongue reaches deeper...she slaps her bottom* higuchi: AHHN~ Gin: *pulls out her tongue, crawls up Higuchi--puts her lips along her nipple as she slides two fingers into her and starts thrusting* higuchi: gin! *wraps her arms around her back and grips her shoulders* Gin: *holds onto her, whispers in her ear...* "You better start fingering me, you little slut--or else." *pulls out her fingers--and spanks Higuchi* higuchi: nnh! *doing so* Gin: *sharp inhale* "Fuck!" *matches her pace* -after a few moments- higuchi: *laying in her arms* ........*sniff* Gin: *strokes her hair* "...Ready to talk?" higuchi: *nods* -she tells her the whole thing- Gin: "..." *hug* "I'm sorry." higuchi: *sobs into her chest* r-rain died because of this! Gin: "..." *nods* "Yes. And what do we do now...?" higuchi: i-i dont know.... Gin: "...Do you need a day off?" higuchi:....y-yeah.....b-but i should at least....tell them what i know.... Gin: "Chuuya?" higuchi:......*nod* Gin: *sighs* "At his apartment?" higuchi:.....t-tomorrow, at the executive meeting.... Gin: "!!! In front of all of them?" higuchi: it's important that they know this. this is the reason i went on this mission to begin with. Gin: "..." *sighs* "But this...is so much. I can only imagine the reactions." higuchi:...*whimpering* Gin: "Hey..." *holds her* "You'll need your rest for tomorrow..." -elsewhere- Chuuya: "..." *looks at Sonia, asleep* sonia: zzzzz Chuuya: *passes a hand over her hair to push it aside* sonia: =w= Chuuya: ("Please...be safe.") -morning- Tanizaki: *yawns* atsushi: *packing up* Kyoka: "..." *looks around* naomi: whats up? Kyoka: "Just...thinking who else to bring." naomi:... -at the airport- ????: um, excuse me, before you go? atsushi: ??.... !!! -its hans...and she brought sylvia with a suitcase- Kyoka: *eyes wide* sylvia: *small wave* hans: who of you is in charge? Dazai: "That would be--" *Kunikida and Hans both punch him in the face, knocking him back* Kunikida: "I am the representative for the Agency on this visit." hans: *ahem* mr kunikida, please accept this. *hands him a letter* Kunikida: "..." *takes the letter* "Is there a preference when to open it?" hans: right now would be acceptable. -there is a sigil on it, the same marking on ted's hand- Kunikida: *opens the letter* letter: to our new friends at the agency. we have decided to leave miss sylvia plath in your custody. all the paperwork has been taken care of, so you just handle the rest on your end. maybe one day we will meet again, sincerely, johann wolfgang von goethe. PS, by new friends, we mean all of you except dazai, he can fuck right off. atsushi: ._.; fancy handwriting. hans: i did the actual writing. goethe just did his signature and told me what to write. {goethe: *uuugh* handwritings such a pain.} atsushi: *sweatdrop* (so he's like your ranpo, then...) Dazai: Q_Q "...I want to go home now." sylvia:.... hans: <its ok, sylvia. they'll look after you.> *hands her her ticket.* sylvia:...o-o-ok... Kyoka: "Sylvia...We'll take care of you." sylvia:....*tearing up* o-o-ok, m-miss kyouka... Kyoka: "..." *smiles, takes her hand* sylvia: !!! Kyoka: "Let's go home." -elsewhere- Stein: *staring at a photo against a building* soul: *yaaawn* so glad this is all over with. cant wait to get home. Stein: "..." *rubs his eye* soul:...doc? you ok? Stein: "Just something in my eye..." soul:..... Stein: *sighs* "We filed our report--a lot of good it did against that Hughes." soul:...yeah.... -elsewhere- Poe: "I got the welcome home banner ready!" *holds it up--it's in very fancy handwriting* kirako: ^^; kenji: this is gonna be awesome! aya: yeah! Lucy: "The cake is in the fridge. Also, I put a lock on the fridge after the last cake we lost..." ranpo: *pout* Poe: ^^; "When is their flight coming in?" kirako: sometime this afternoon. Katai: "M-Maybe dust their desks?" *runs a finger along Kunikida's desk* -elsewhere- higuchi: *outside the door* ..... Gin: "...Do you want me to go in?" higuchi: *breathes and opens the door* Gin: "...Do you want me to go in?" higuchi: *breathes and opens the door* kouyou: miss higuchi, glad to see you. Chuuya: "..." higuchi:...*hard gulp* good morning. i would like to show my findings from the mission. Chuuya: *staring at Higuchi* -after higuchi explains her findings....- kouyou: !!!! *covering her mouth, stunned.* tachihara: w-w-what the hell?! Chuuya: "..." *his eyes are dull...he's just staring at the table* higuchi: .....*shaking* Gin: "..." *looks at Kouyou* "Your response?" kouyou: t-this is....a lot to take in... tachihara: t-t-this has to be a-a sick joke, right? *awkward laughing, but he's shaking* Hirotsu: "..." *removes his cigarette container, lights up, inhales deeply...exhales* "...Higuchi. This information does not leave this room." higuchi:...noted... kouyou:....chuuya? Chuuya: "..." *gripping the table* higuchi: chuuya- -the walkie talkie goes off- mafioso: m-m-mr hirotsu s-sir! Hirotsu: "Here. Report." mafioso: w-we're under attack! the- -BANG- higuchi: ???!!! naoya: what the hell's going on?! ???: "..." <Hello.> naoya: !!!!! fuck, that's beaky! Gin: "!!!" Ivan: "It is good to speak with you all again~" higuchi: shit. EVERYONE TO BATTLE STATIONS, NOW! DONT LET THEM GET TO THE TOP FLOOR. lydia: <what do you say to that, vanya?> Chuuya: *runs* kouyou: chuuya wait! yana: .... Ivan: *cackling* "...What makes you think we haven't already?" -elsewhere- mafioso: all those who can fight, hold them off, those who cant, evacuate! pushkin: aw jeez, aw jeez.... katya: pushkin, go with them, i'll go ahead. pushkin: try not to get killed ok? katya: i'll be fine.. *smirks* i've been looking forwards to this... -elsewhere- lydia: *searching*... *SLASH* lydia: *dodges* *It's a dark tendril--looks to be formed from energy and cloth* lydia: hmm, so the silent rabid dog has shown himself? Akutagawa: *intense stare out of the shadow...not blinking...* lydia:...so the name has meaning. *sending one of her beasts, a stag, after him* Akutagawa: *retracts Rashomon, wrapping it around himself until he blends with the shadows, escaping back* lydia:....so that's how you wish to play... so be it. -elsewhere- Ivan: *keeping to the shadows* -BULLET GRAZE- Ivan: "!!!" *something pulls him back in time* <Sh-Shit...> ???: <been a while, vachenka.> Ivan: "..." *smiles* <Quite. Enjoying your new home?> katya: <a lot better than the last shithole we lived in.> Ivan: <Now, is that any way to refer to Master's plans~?> katya: <after how he stabbed us in the back? gladly.> *charges at him* Ivan: "!!!" *keeps backing up and up* <New tricks?> katya: *guns out and shooting* Ivan: *dodges, hides behind a low barrier* "..." *smirks* <I have new tricks, too...> *Something clutches Katya's leg, with tiny fingers* katya: !!! *There are tiny golems, pulling at her, crawling up her* katya: *shaking them off* shit! *They start combining, wrapping around her--one jamming her gun* katya: !!!! Ivan: <I figured, why go for something big and cumbersome, when something more compact could get the work done...> katya: perhaps, but.... -10 seconds- *she takes a knife and stabs him in the ankle* Ivan: *howls in pain* katya: *smirks* *All the baby golems grab their "ankles" in pain* Baby Golem: Q_Q "WAAAAH!" katya: *holds her gun to his face* Ivan: *deep inhale* <You dare to turn your back on master...He will destroy all who get in his way...> katya: <what will happen when he turns his back on you?> Ivan: *smiles* <I'll smile.> katya:....<you really have lost your brain.> Ivan: <Funny about loss--> *SMASH* katya: HRK- Ivan: <Go big, or go home...> *A giant golem now crushes down on Katya* -a knife is held up to ivan's neck- ???: if you know what's good for you, goncharov, you'll let her go. Ivan: <...> *releases the golem* katya: .... !!! leo: *glaring at ivan* good. Ivan: <...That's not the look I expected, Leo.> leo: *ignoring him* katya, are you alright? katya: y-yeah. gun's jammed, though... Ivan: "??? Okay...All kinds of surprising..." leo: *glares at him...something about her eyes seems different....they seem more alive* Ivan: "!!! ...What happened to you?" leo: it's simple. i've found a reason for living. Ivan: "..." <Good.> -elsewhere- Chuuya: *running* ???: glad to see you again, mr executive. Chuuya: "...You." yana: *wearing the rat mask* how's your daughter? Chuuya: "..." *A pebble falls from the ceiling onto Yana's head* yana: *jumps back* Chuuya: "..." *opens his eyes--they are black* yana: !!!? Chuuya: *stands--* *and he's gone* yana: ?? *running to the stairs* (well shit...) *There are footsteps following her...They aren't behind her* yana: *looks up* !!! Chuuya: *he's keeping up with her pace...he is not feeling or thinking--he is only instinct, only a force of nature...* *blasts off the ceiling and at her* yana: *jumps up a few stairs to dodge* ah! ow... *GRAB* *Chuuya's crash broke the stairs...and a hand shoots out from the rubble* yana: !!! *Chuuya clutches her ankle* yana: *kicking at him* let go! Chuuya: *growls* "Moooooooooriiiiiii..." yana: ???!!!! Chuuya: *swings her around and throws her through--not in, _through_--the wall* -CRASH- yana: *groans as her mask cracks* <fuck.> *Light pours into the room, with Chuuya blocking it...Even with his shadow over her, his eyes glow white* yana: !!! (shit this is bad, think, yana, think!) *looking for an exit* Chuuya: "Mori...Dostoyevsky...Rain...Keek..." *marches inside, each step smashing the ground below his weight* yana: *looking around* (come on. come onnnnn....) Chuuya: *grabs her ankle--and squeezes, breaking the ankle* yana: *screams before taking the mask off and throwing it at him* *The mask just hits a gravity field, shattering into bits immediately* Chuuya: *stares at Yana* "...Child..." {???: "Papa?"} {Chuuya: "??? What is it, Sonia?"} {sonia: are you feeling alright?} {Chuuya: *smiles* "Yes. Just a bit tired..." *he puts away a folder of files...one sheet pokes up with a drawing*} {sonia: ...} {Chuuya: "I just have to wrap this up and--" *he drops the folder--and one drawing falls out...It's an artist's rendering of Yana, based on witness descriptions*} {sonia:......she was like me too.} {Chuuya: "??? What do you mean?"} {sonia: miss yana was born from the incubator like i was. she came out of it all grown up though...} {Chuuya: "...I didn't know..."} Chuuya: "...What the hell did Dostoyevsky do to you?" yana:....what do you mean? Chuuya: "...Incubaters? Child assassin? How old are you? Physically?" yana: i mean, i look about 19 or so.... Chuuya: "And you're only, what, 2 years old?" yana:.....not really sure myself. Chuuya: "...He screwed you up." yana: ......well, i am an 8th of him, genetically. the eyes should give _that_ much away. Chuuya: "And you don't know the other seven..." yana: hell if i'd know..... Chuuya: "...Dostoyevsky and Mori...Screwing up children and everyone in their way..." yana: what does the former mafia boss have to do with- Chuuya: "Nevermind..." *grabs her by the back of the neck* "We'll have plenty of time to talk..." yana: ......im not here to kill your leaders. i simply come with an ultimatum. Chuuya: "I'm listening." yana: our cleaner has released his ability. and the crimes he's covered up are slowly surfacing. within a month, the mafia's crimes will be discovered. Chuuya: "!!!" yana: so you have a decision. die to the rats, or die to the government. that's all i needed to say. Chuuya: "..." *POW* yana: grk-.... Chuuya: *grabs her by the wrists* "Let's go..." *marches her on her good foot down the stairs* yana:..... -elsewhere- Gin: *tosses a kunai* rat: GRK- *collapses* Gin: *looks around* -the other rats are either dead or have fled the scene- naoya: that clears this section Gin: "Use this as base to push forward." *calls into walkie talkie* "Report." tachihara: all good. ayako: CLEAR BABY! Hirotsu: "We need coverage in the East Sector--Akutagawa has not reported--" Gin: "!!!" -elsewhere- lydia: *attacking with her beasts* Akutagawa: *wraps Rashomon around himself...* *grabs a beast by the throat* beast: *roaring* Akutagawa: *grabs the tail of the beast and starts pulling* -BANG- Akutagawa: "..." *shudders* lydia: *holding a gun that has just been fired* if i only relied on my beasts......i would have died long ago.. Akutagawa: "R-Rash..." *The cloak falls from him in tatters...It's gray, lifeless* Akutagawa: "..." *stumbles back to the wall...leans against a glass window* -a beast charges at him…a tiger...- Akutagawa: "!!!!" *grabs the tiger by its jaws* -CRASH- *Glass shatters, as the tiger knocks itself and Akutagawa out the window, down 20 stories...* lydia:.....*walking away* *over talkie* <the rabid dog has been incapacitated.> *static* Chuuya: "..." *holding the talkie, listening* "..." yana:....heh..... Chuuya: "What's so funny?" yana: just thinking about something...... Chuuya: "!!! N-No..." Motojiro: "Yes..." *glances at Yana* "We got one of theirs?" pushkin: um...hi yana. long time no see. ^^;;; *he's all punched up* yana: <hey pushkin, you look like shit> pushkin: <fuuunny story about that.> {Motojiro: "EEK! A rat!" *picks up a crowbar and starts hitting Pushkin's shoulder and face*} {pushkin: OW! IM ON YOUR SIDE NOW! OW! STOP HITTING ME! ACK! OW! WAAAAH! <MAMA! MAKE HIM STOP IT!>} yana: <yikes> Motojiro: ^^; *now serious again* "Let's get her locked up..." Chuuya: "..." *sighs* "How many are we going to lose?" yana:.... -classical music has come over the intercom- yana: they'll be taking their leave now... -elsewhere- leo: *listening* (moonlight sonata....) katya: oh, dont think you can run away like a coward, gonch! Ivan: <Who's running~?> ???: "HA HA HA HA..." katya: wait a second....<MOTHER FUCK-> *SLICE* katya: *blood splatters onto her face* !!!!!!! leo: ........ ???: <Did that hurt?> *a finger reaches out of the darkness--and flicks Leo in the forehead* leo: !!! *stumbles back* *Gogol emerges* Gogol: <I bet it did...> leo: *coughing blood* Gogol: *kick to the torso before sending another playing card into her forehead* -BOOM- leo: *crashed into a wall* nnghh... katya: son of a BITCH! *aims her gun...out of ammo*....FUCK! *throws her gun* Gogol: *catches the gun, looks at it* "Hmm...Souvenir?" *keeps studying the gun--before another set of playing cards pins Katya by her shoulders to the floor* Ivan: "..." *looks at the destruction against the wall* katya: *glares* leo: *she just stares at ivan, harshly* Gogol: <Shall we depart?> Ivan: "..." *nods* katya: GO TO HELL, YOU LITERAL FUCKING ENEMA! Gogol: *smiles back* <Is this _not_ Hell?> *rests a hand on Ivan's shoulder, as they walk back into the shadows* Ivan: *stares forward from the shadows, no smile on his face* -elsewhere- higuchi: *looking around* any updates? naoya: the rats are fleeing the scene. Chuuya: "We got a captive..." naoya: awesome! Motojiro: "..." yana:....*glances* *The lights in the room flicker* pushkin: oh fuck... fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck! Chuuya: "...Higuchi? We heard a report over their communicators." higuchi: what is it? Motojiro: "??! What? What?!" Chuuya: "Higuchi...They got Akutagawa." higuchi: *her stomach drops* *The lights completely go out* pushkin: !!!!!! *SCREEEEAM* Motojiro: *grabs a lemon--* *SLICE* Motojiro: *screams, clutching his hand* *The lemon drops, rolls--and blows up* pushkin: ACK! *A hand grabs Higuchi by the hair* higuchi: !!!!!! *SLICE along her hair and at her shoulder* higuchi: AH! *The assailant pushes Higuchi into Chuuya, knocking them both down, and Yana with them* ???: <Whoops! Didn't see you there...> naoya: *trying to use her ability* fuck, too dark... yana: <hey, watch where you're shoving!> Chuuya: "Where is he?!" *swings his hand, trying to lift rubble to let light in--* *YOINK* Chuuya: "?!" *Chuuya can barely make out someone picking up...his hat* Gogol: "..." *slasher smile as he puts on the hat* Chuuya: "!!!!" Gogol: "Souven--" *CRASH* Gogol: "?!!!" Chuuya: *tackled Gogol--and slams his fist into Gogol's head* Gogol: <FUCK!> yana: just give it back, its not worth it. Chuuya: *punch punch punch* "GIVE IT BACK GIVE IT BAC--" *PUSH* Gogol: <FUCK!> *holding his mouth, blood pouring out* "TAKE IT!" *tosses the hat--which spins like a sharp metal disk* Motojiro: "!!! Duck!" pushkin: *DUCK* *A strand of hair falls down in front of Pushkin’s face, the hat embedded in the wall* pushkin: Q-Q;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; Gogol: <W-We done here?> yana: <ready to go....> mr executive, let the others know what i told you, alright~?.... <gogol, carry me out of here, he broke my leg> Gogol: "..." <Want me to break his?> yana: <nah, not worth it> higuchi: WAIT!....Q....where is he? yana: oh, you mean oreo boy?.....he's safe. for the time being. Chuuya: *seething* "...As monstrous as that father of yours..." yana: ........ Chuuya: "After what he did to Sonia, of course he'd put another child through that..." yana:......*looks way* higuchi: chuuya? Chuuya: "...Higuchi...That child is Dostoyevsky's daughter." higuchi: ???!!!! yana: clone baby is more accurate, but yeah. higuchi: !!!!!!!!!! Chuuya: "And what you did to Sonia--" Gogol: =_= *yawns* "Can we go now?" yana:....yes.... Gogol: *sneers--as multiple playing cards appear--* Chuuya: "!!! Hit the floor!" *SWIPE SWIPE SWIPE SWIPE* -they're gone- higuchi:......*slams fist down* SHIT! Chuuya: "..." *looks at Motojiro* Motojiro: *gasping, clutching his bleeding wrist* higuchi: *over talkie* GET MEDICAL IN HERE, NOW! -elsewhere- Tanizaki: "Doctor!" *waves* yosano: *waves* Kyoka: "That's Yosano, the doctor." sylvia: .... yosano: ?? oh? who's this? sylvia: eep! >.< Kunikida: "She was turned over to our care. We'll explain on the way." Dazai: ^^\\ *he has a slap mark on his face* -and so- *Confetti goes up* sylvia: EEP! *hides behind kyouka* kirako: welcome back everyone! aya: WELCOME BACK! kenji: ^^ Kunikida: "..." *looks at Aya* "...Aya." aya: *HUG* Kunikida: "..." *pat pat* Lucy: "..." atsushi: *hugs lucy and smooches her, dipping her as he does so* Lucy: O\\\\\O atsushi: h-how was that? .//////. Lucy: .\\\\\\. *steam coming off her head* Dazai: *sniff* *wipes a tear* "He's become an adult now..." Tanizaki: ^^; atsushi: i-i saw that in a movie and figured i should try it. ^////^; Lucy: "..." *hug* *whispers in his ear* "Good movie..." atsushi: hehehehe.... =/////= sylvia: .....*shuffling feet* Kyoka: "...Sir? This is the person I had mentioned." fukuzawa: *looks at her* sylvia: Q~Q *shaking* fukuzawa:...................for now, we'll set up a room for her. Kyoka: *nods* "Thank you." Dazai: *looks at Ranpo* "We miss anything?" ranpo: nothing much. Poe: "..." Katai: "..." Poe: ("Her eyes look like Karl's...") sylvia: Q____Q;;;; m-miss kyouka, there's so many people here..... Kyoka: "I know. They're harmless. Mostly." *whispers* "Ranpo steals sweets. Don't let him near." Poe + Katai: *serious faces* ("PROTECT HER.") sylvia: *answering whine* Dazai: *his ear is next to Kirako's stomach* kirako: *funny voice* hi papa, we missed you. ^^ Dazai: TwT "I missed you, too..." sylvia:......mr dazai you're awful. kirako: ?? naomi: *whispers* kirako: O-O oh, we're not actually married. its friends with benefits! ^^;;; sylvia:....oh...s-sorry....Q_____Q Dazai: QwQ "...Haven't I been embarrassed enough by this German expedition?" Everyone in the room: "NO." -elsewhere- Akitaru: "--and more attempts at arson have been popping up." shinra: dang....any updates on the meeting with arg? Akitaru: "Approved and ready." shinra: finally..... Akitaru: "Yeah, bureaucracy is a trickle...Speaking of which--" *holds up two ties* "Which one should I wear?" shinra: um....that one? Akitaru: "Good choice...Sorry, just nervous. I have a meeting with an agency director...and I didn't want to ask Takehisa because...Well..." Takehisa: *wearing a tuxedo shirt, heart boxers, bunny slippers, sipping coffee* shinra:......right. ._.; Akitaru: "While you're getting info from the 6th, I'll be trying to rope in some help outside the brigades. I asked Hibana to talk to Haijima...It didn't go well." {Hibana: *screaming into the phone* "YOU ASSHOLES BETTER GET IN FUCKING LINE BEFORE I GO IN THERE AND TEAR YOUR BALLS OFF--"} {Akitaru: -_-# } iris: yikes. Akitaru: "Please help your sister find religion again..." maki: alsooooo, BENIMARU AND KIREI ARE ENGAGED!!! <3 shinra: glad to hear. Akitaru: "!!! That's great!" Arthur: *pops up from underneath Akitaru's desk* "Wait, they were dating?" Akitaru: "..." tamaki:......*facepalm* -elsewhere- ???: *groans* "G-Gin..." ???: ?? hello? *Akutagawa's eyes break open--and his hand reaches out to grab the threat* ????: woah! *falls over* h-hey, are you alright, dude? Akutagawa: "St-Stay back! I'll...I'll..." *looks down* "..." *he's in only his ripped pants* "...Oh. Rashomon..." ???: easy now, you're really hurt badly. come on, one of my coworkers is a doctor. *holds their hand out* Akutagawa: *snarls--then clutches his side with a whine* ???: hold on, i got you. *helping him up* Akutagawa: "Wh-Where are they?" ???: hm? Akutagawa: "Wh-Where did you find me? Was I followed?" ???: i just found you lying on some trash bags, dude. Akutagawa: "...Who are you?" ???: *they smile* call me 'Kan'. Akutagawa: "...Ryu." kan: ok ryu, just hold on, we're almost there. -elsewhere- sonia: ..... Babysitter: "...Sonia? Would you like to play a game while we wait?" sonia:....i dunno..... Babysitter: "...I know you're worried. But I called your father and left a voicemail. I'm sure he'll respond--" *SLAM SLAM SLAM against the door* sonia: !!! Babysitter: "Oh my..." *walks to the door...which has multiple locks...there is also a compartment next to the door* *peeks through the peephole* "!!!" *throws open the door* "Mr. Nakahara--!" Chuuya: *he looks exhausted, beaten, but standing* *he's leaning against the doorway* "S-Sonia...Where is she?" sonia: !!! papa! Chuuya: "!!!" *tries to walk in--and stumbles* Babysitter: "!!! What the hell happened?!" sonia: *runs over to him* Chuuya: "Sh-Shut it...lock it..." *hugs Sonia, holding her tightly* mito: *mreow* Babysitter: "..." *slam the door, locks all the locks, starts typing onto the compartment* sonia:...papa? whats going on? Chuuya: *holds Sonia's face* "Sweetie...I want you to go into your room, and grab your emergency suitcase. Put clothes in there. Grab what you need. Do you understand?" sonia:... o-ok....*going to do so.* Babysitter: "...How bad?" Chuuya: "We're all going underground." *takes out his wallet, shoves $100 bills to the babysitter* "You need to get out of town until this blows over." Babysitter: "..." *pockets it, opens the compartment--and removes a gun* "Not the first time...I told you that babysitting wasn't paying me shit." Chuuya: "I'll call you when it's all clear. You need to contact the others outside." Babysitter: "Why?" sonia:..... *listening as she packs up* Chuuya: "The police will be after them to. Get them all underground--and get ready for the Goose Chase." Babysitter: "!!! Now?!" Chuuya: *whispers* "After the shit I heard today, you're fucking right. This stops now!" sonia:....... -elsewhere- fukuzawa:.... *knocks* mori? Mori: "Hmm?" fukuzawa: surpisingly, dazai brought you a gift. *hands him a wrapped item* Mori: "??? What is it?" fukuzawa: open it. Mori: "..." *small rip* "I hope Dazai didn't put a bomb in here..." fukuzawa: *shakes head* {Dazai: "I assure you, there is no bomb. I got it through security, and you know I would never try to get something through security illegally. You can even have it scanned!"} {Kunikida: *already pulling a bomb scanner from his book--*} {Dazai: "NO ONE TRUSTS ME HERE!"} Mori: *opens the gift--and just stares, shocked* -it's a doll. like elise- Mori: "..." *A drop falls onto the doll* fukuzawa: .... Mori: *smiles, crying* "Elise..." fukuzawa:....i'll leave you be for now....*exits the room* Mori: *hugs the doll* -elsewhere- Stein: *opens the door to the lab* aya drevis: welcome home, dad! valentine: ^^ marie: welcome back! Stein: "...Hey." *hair ruffle on Aya* aya drevis: ^^ -elsewhere- Yohei: *pulls over* "Okay. What time am I picking you two up?" mono: *looks at ashi* Assi: AwA chie: have fun now, ok? Assi: "Th-Thanks!" *opens the door for Mono* mono: woah. *The interior is a celebration of wealth--with extravagant drinking and dining options* Assi: "I see he went all out..." mono: i feel so small. Assi: "Yeah...It's kind of like that a lot. But people here at work largely make it welcoming." ^w^ "Want something to drink?" mono: maybe some soda. Assi: "Sure thing!" *waves* "Two sodas, please!" Zuno: "You got it!" *hands them* "Here you go, Mono and...um..." Assi: ^^;;;; mono: assi. Zuno: "???" *points at Mono* "Wait, you're Assi? I thought you were Mono." mono:... -_-; -elsewhere- Daisy: *arms crossed, tapping her foot* eckleburg: *scoot scoot* Daisy: *turns her head* eckleburg: ^^ *wave* Daisy: "..." *nods* "Hey. How you doing?" eckleburg: LOOKING GOOD TONIGHT DAISY! *ahem* s-sorry. Daisy: "Wow, volume control, much?" *looks him up and down* "Nice threads." eckleburg: thank you, it was my grandfather's. Daisy: "Huh, retro. Nice. What you having?" eckleburg: nothing too strong. Daisy: "You a Shirley Temple dude?" eckleburg: sure. lets go with that. Daisy: "One Shirley Temple, one gin rickey." Hyde: "On it...Ochaco, get some ice." ochako: yessir! Daisy: "...Isn't she a little young to be making drinks?" Hyde: "Just the non-alcoholic ones." ochako: *whistling* *Hyde serves them up* Daisy: *sips* eckleburg: thank you. Daisy: "..." *holds up her drink* "Cheers." eckleburg: cheers. ^^ -underground- zoey: *patching everyone up* Ivan: TT_TT# zoey: *bandaging his ankle. tightly. * Ivan: "GAH!" zoey: awww, was that...too much~? Ivan: "You know it was..." zoey: hehe~ yana: <vanya, stop your griping, we're all hurting...> Ivan: Y~Y <I didn't mean to ignore your pain, Young Master...> yana: <its fine...> *staring up at the ceiling* Ivan: "???" <May I do anything?> yana: <for now, lets all just take it easy until we're all healed up.> Ivan: *sighs* yana:......<something bothering you?> Ivan: <...Seeing Lev again...> yana: <oh?> Ivan: <She looked...happy.> yana: <happy to see you? makes sense-> Ivan: <Happy to be threatening to kill us.> yana: ?! Ivan: <...I think she _likes_ being with them.> yana: <well, a lot can happen in two or so months.......does it bother you?> Ivan: "..." <No. It's fine...> *looks away* yana: ........ <he _did_ remove your 'unhappiness', right?> Ivan: *puts on a smile* <Of course~> yana:.....<i see.> *staring up at the ceiling* Ivan: "..." <We'll need so many drugs...> yana: *replying grunt and turns away* Ivan: "..." <Rest, okay?> yana:...<yeah......one more thing...> Ivan: <Hmm?> yana: <do you think....there's a reason why i was born?> Ivan: <Of course! To serve Master~> yana:.....<right.....night gonch....> Ivan: *yawns* <Night...> Fitzgerald: "Everyone having a good time?" mary: you bet! bram: *nod nod* Mr. Tsubaki: *munching on grapes* mary: having fun, toby? ^^ *pet pet* Mr. Tsubaki: *tail wag, grape juice on his face* mary: hehe ^^ -elsewhere- Daisy: =w= "Sip a little more--it's not that alcoholic..." eckleburg: miss daisy. ._.;; Daisy: "Don't be such a stick in the mud! Loosen up...Come on, you never drink?" eckleburg: well i am driving home tonight. Daisy: "Aaaah, we can share a ride. I'll call a Hyrs." eckleburg: um. ._.; Daisy: *smiles* "Cool..." *lays back, looking up at the ceiling* "Hee hee...Shiny chandelier." eckleburg: come on, lets get you sat down... Daisy: "I'm fine--" *leans too far back* eckleburg: *holding her up* Daisy: "...Um...Thanks?" -elsewhere- Assi: "C-C-Care to...to..." mono: ?? Assi: "D-D-D-Dance?" mono: eh, sure. Assi: OwO "O-Okay..." *walks with her to the dance floor* mono: ... 7///7; Assi: *starts to dance by himself, a bit nerdy* mono: *rolls eyes and grabs his hand* here, like this. Assi: .\\\\\\. "O-Okay..." *follows her* -elsewhere- Kyoka: "And this is your room." sylvia: ..... Kyoka: "We have more blankets in the closet. Other pillows...Are you hungry?" sylvia:....*sits down on one chair* ...... Kyoka: "..." *nods* "I'll make some tea..." sylvia: t-thank you....m-miss kyouka.... Kyoka: "..." *nods* "You're welcome." *walks to the kitchen* sylvia: .... Kyoka: "Atsushi, did you want tea?" atsushi: sure. lucy? Lucy: "That'd be nice." *smiles* "...Thank you for helping that girl." Kyoka: "..." *small blush, nods* sylvia: ..... {Ted: *smiles*} sylvia: *cowering and crying* Kyoka: *returns* "...Sylvia?" sylvia: h-he's in here. h-he's in this room... atsushi: its ok, sylvia. he's not here. hes gone. *pats her back* sylvia: *wince* Lucy: "..." Kyoka: "You're far away now. And you'll be safe here." sylvia: *sniffle* *hic* Kyoka: "..." *hug* sylvia:.....*awkward hug* Kyoka: *smiles* Lucy: "..." *sets down the tea* -elsewhere- Dazai: "Sure you're okay?" *rests a hand on her stomach* kirako: *nods* mii: zzzzz Dazai: *strokes Mii's back* mii: *purrs* Dazai: "This little guy been a good protector?" kirako: he sure has. *cuddles mii* mii: >w>;;;;; Dazai: *holds her* kirako: ^^ Dazai: "Good kitty..." -elsewhere- Gin: *covering her face* higuchi: *pats her back* we'll find him. naoya: this is akuta we're talking about, he's a tough kid. Gin: "Are you sure that was what you heard?" pushkin: 'incapacitated' doesnt mean 'dead'. Gin: "..." *nods* -elsewhere- Yohei: *checks the clock* "...Getting late. Ready to go pick them up?" chie: *she nods* Yohei: *picks up the keys* "Mana, you're in charge. Make sure those two behave." Shotaro: ^w^ *angel halo* Emine: -_- *devil horns* mana: noted. Yohei: *opens the door for Chie* "Ma'am." chie: why thank you~ Yohei: *smiles, guides her to the car* Emine: *already has a stick of dynamite out and a match* mana: emine no. -elsewhere- sakutaro: *having removed the bullet from akutagawa's injury* there. Akutagawa: *pants* "...O-Ow..." kan: thanks, dr hagiwara. Akutagawa: *whimpering* sakutaro: just doing my job. when he's back to health, i want him out of here. Akutagawa: *groans* kan: you gonna be ok, ryu? Akutagawa: "...As soon as I get home...or, rather, to my...family." kan: right....family...... Akutagawa: "..." *yawns* kan: get some sleep, ok? Akutagawa: "Y-Yes..." *muttering* -morning- Kunikida: *sorting files* kirako: morning everyone. Tanizaki: "Morning." Kunikida: *nods* "Busy day..." *pours coffee* "Ready for today?" yosano: yep. naomi: so what's the gameplan? Tanizaki: "Still trying to keep pace with all the new cases--and how Katai..." *picks up a blanket* "Erm, 'files' papers..." fukuzawa: .... Kunikida: *looks at a few files--* "!!!" fukuzawa: if you're all here. there's an important meeting to be had. attendance is mandatory. Kunikida: *shakes slightly, setting it down* Tanizaki: "??? Kirako, where's Dazai?" -in the meeting room- Kunikida: "All are present." fukuzawa: good. now onto business......we need to prepare for kirako's baby shower. Tanizaki: ._.; "R-Right." naomi: *phew* (how surprisingly lighthearted...) Dazai: ^^;;; ranpo: oh. Kyoka: "We begin with the diapers. I counted how many months a baby needs them. More without potty training." yosano: and baby clothes. Tanizaki: "Some neat toys?" atsushi: *smiles* (any ideas, odasaku?) Odasaku: ( Q____Q "...Plenty.") atsushi: .... (i dont know how to pat a ghost on the back. ^-^;; ) Odasaku: ("Just...start with some soft toys--no small parts. A doll. And some books--they'll need to hear someone read to them...") atsushi: *writing this all down* Kyoka: "???" Kunikida: "Well, someone is generating ideas..." atsushi: ^^; (thanks, odasaku.) Dazai: *looks over his shoulder* "...Hmm...Good choices." atsushi: t-thanks...(odasaku what do i tell him??? D8> ) Odasaku: ("How about 'been looking into this sort of thing'?") atsushi: been doing my research, i guess. Dazai: "...What, Lucy's pregnant or something?" atsushi: .///o W-W-WHAT?! NO! THAT'S NOT- Kunikida: *death glare at both of them* Dazai: .w. *sits down* Kyoka: *judging them* Odasaku: (Q~Q "...Sorry.") atsushi: ._.;;; Kunikida: "Back to priorities...We'll have a party. Ranpo, handle the menu--" ranpo: *opens mouth* Tanizaki: "Maaaaaaybe we should have someone who isn't going to just pick sweets?" ranpo:...fine, then i guess i just pout. Tanizaki: ^^; "Hey, we can still have a few chips and cookies...but maybe some fancy cheeses and crackers?" Kunikida: "Oh, I think there's a sale on that." -elsewhere- Sid: "A lot of students not here..." nygus: hmm... but plenty of other still are. soon it will be time for spring enrollments... Sid: "And orientation." nygus: *nods* Sid: "We're about ready with the next course offerings. Wanted to check with you on your schedule..." -elsewhere- Assi: ^\\\^ "I had fun..." mono: y-yeah.. same here... 7///7; Assi: "...Well, good luck at work! Maybe we can...talk after?" mono: i guess..... -elsewhere- Chuuya: "..." sonia: *asleep in a cot with mito* Chuuya: *sighs* ("What am I going to do...") ayako: this is AWESOME! its like a big old sleepover! this one time i did an in school sleepover in 7th grade- *bla bla bla bla* Motojiro: *shifts awkwardly, favoring his non-injured wrist* leo: how are you feeling? Motojiro: "Better...It'll take a little longer to heal--that card really went through." leo:...*hug* Motojiro: *hug* "Are you okay?" leo: yes. partially injured, but im better now.... Motojiro: "..." *nods* *holds onto her* leo: u///u kuniko: ._.; Gin: "Kuniko? You okay?" kuniko: yeah. kinda freaked out though. ._.;;; higuchi: *pats her back* Gin: "...We'll figure this out soon." higuchi: for now, lets just get our rooms set up. Tachihara: "I call the room that's not weird..." -elsewhere- Black Star: [how was germany?] soul: [busy] Black Star: [can imagine. they at least give you a week off?] soul: [ya] Black Star: [well catch some z's. want to meet up for dinner?] soul: [pizza plz] Black Star: [u got it!] -elsewhere- shinra: *shaking* Asako: "??? Mr. Kusakabe?" shinra: yes ma'am? Asako: "Are you nervous, too?" shinra: very much so ma'am! Asako: "...I am, too. I haven't seen Grandfather in some time..." shinra: ....did you get along with him? Asako: "..." *sad smile, nods* "Before...his injury." shinra:....right..... Asako: "I forget--have you been here before?" shinra: yeah, i was a student at the training school. so was arthur. Asako: *smiles* "It's good that you got to be placed together in the 8th." shinra: yeah... <_<; hurray for us. -fwiiiip- shinra: X-O we're here. loud.... pan: ah, commander arg, kusakabe. *nods* Asako: *nods* "Hello, sir." shinra: ._.; pan: been a while, kusakabe. not getting into trouble at the 8th i hope. shinra: -___-; no, sir. ???: "Oh, that sounds--" *clap* "--like a lie--" *clap* *Carin is doing push-ups--and clapping on every one to show off* shinra: *glare* carin. Carin: "Hey, Shinra. What's wrong--toilets backed up at the 8th and left you here?" shinra: not in the mood carin, i've got stuff to do. Carin: "???! Hey!" *bounces up* "You don't get to just walk on in here--" pan: carin, lay off, go get dressed. Carin: *grumble grumble* "Don't blame me if your mom gets killed next..." gwen: ............ juria: *chewing gum and leaning against the wall* Asako: ._.; shinra: *ahem* hey gwen, sorry about morgan.... gwen:.....t-trying to survive. Asako: "..." *looks to Pan* "Is the Chief in?" pan: should be. Asako: *nods* "We'll follow you." ogun: *waves to shinra* ^^ shinra: *waves back* juria: the hell you staring at, pipsqueak? shinra: 0_0 i wasnt talking to you ma'am! Asako: ._.;; "Former classmates?" shinra: ogun and gwen are. the oni, not so much... ._.;;;;;; -inside- Asako: "Mr. Kusakabe, you should go first..." shinra: are you sure? he is your grandfather... Asako: "...When I wrote to him that this was about the Adora Burst, he insisted on speaking with you." *puts on a smile* "It's okay. I don't want to get in the way." shinra:.....ok....*gulps* um.....h-hello?....c-commander arg? sir? *A man stands behind the desk, back facing the door, staring at the window curtain* shinra:...*ahem* *salute* shinra kusakabe, reporting, sir. Souichirou: "...I've been waiting for you...wielder of the Adora Burst." shinra: y-you can just call me shin- *Souichirou turns, light reflecting off his glasses* shinra: OwO;;;; Souichirou: "Burn..." shinra: i beg your pardon? *Souichirou marches forward, face to face with Shinra* shinra: O-O;;;;;;;;;;*gulps* Souichirou: "I want you to burn me..." shinra:....i-i-i-i-i'm sorry, what now? Souchirou: "Bless me with those divine flames...so I may see Adora again." shinra:.....*INTERNALLY SCREAMING* ???: "So just do it." shinra: ???!!! ???: "He wants to be burn--so burn him. Seems easy..." shinra: (who the heck...) *The room is not bright...with fire everywhere* shinra: !!!!!!! ???: "After all...you wanted to burn her, too, right?" ???: "SHIIIIIIINRAAAAA..." shinra: ???!!! *The Infernal--his mother--appears* shinra: *nervous smile, but he's crying* m-mom? *Hands grab his shoulders* ???: "Are you okay?" shinra: ??!! Souchirou: "Kusakabe!" shinra: !!!! Souchirou: "S-Sorry...Maybe I shouldn't have been so direct." shinra: r-right.... (my head hurts...) *stumbles to a chair* Souchirou: "It's alright, take all the time you need--" ???: "--because I'm here to help." *flames appear in front of Shinra* shinra: !!!! *falls over* w-w-what the hell?! *The flames assume the form of a woman* shinra: ??...iris? *The woman smiles...and keeps smiling, her mouth contorting into a mad shape...As she leans closer, something wraps around Shinra* shinra: !!!!! *trying to back away out of fear* *Something is scratching along his skin...It's bones! Bones, fused into strange, monstrous shapes* shinra: *screams* Souchirou: "!!! AAAH!" *stumbles back* "I-I just meant a tiny bit? A teensy bit? A teensy-weesy bit?" shinra: *breathing hard* w-wha...what the hell was that? w-who was that lady? Souchirou: " 'Lady'? ...You saw something, didn't you?" shinra: i...i think so.... i saw a woman.....i-i dont think she was human... Souchirou: "..." *pulls up the window blinds* shinra:....sir? do you know anything about the adora burst? Souchirou: "...So...It may have been our meeting that triggered that vision you had...Yes. I know." shinra: .... is that why you have the scars on your face? Souchirou: "...I've always worked hard. That was the ethic instilled into me by my family...and that I've tried to instill in the next generation." shinra:...... but then? Souchirou: "...About seven years ago..." *smiles* "I opened my eyes." shinra: *listening* Souchirou: "You remember, in your history class, about the Great Fire seven years ago?" shinra:....y-yeah.... an entire section of the city, destroyed. since then, it's become the slums. Souchirou: *nods* "...Despite best efforts...I let so many die..." shinra: .... Souchirou: "But...at the time of that incident..." {Souchirou: "!!!"} {*He is surrounded by light...and looks up to see a hand approaching his face*} {*SLICE*} {Souchirou: *howls in pain, clutching his face...behind his glasses appear clawed slices into his skin*} Souchirou: "Despair...salvation...Two sides of the same coin." shinra: ....... Souchirou: "After that encounter, I felt freed, like I had saved everyone...The Adora Link…It is a baptism. Returning to Adora, to that divine world...would be salvation." shinra: *shaking* arg, you're scaring me. Souchirou: *leans forward, smiling* "This mark on my face is a stigmata–a sacred wound. It opened my eyes. Please...Kusakabe: bless me with your holy flames, so I may return..." shinra: y-y-you're out of your mind! Souchirou: "...It's said...in madness can lie truth..." *smiles more widely...and widely...and widely...as the room gets white again for just a second, revealing the Woman* Woman: *smiles* *Then everything is back to normal, and Souchirou looks confused* Souchirou: "??? Kusakabe?" shinra: i dont....feel so good, sir.... Souchirou: "...Let's pause here. I'll get you something to drink--" *Outside the door* ???: "WHAT THE HECK IS THAT?!" juria: hnn? Asako: Q____Q "...So creepy...Those outfits are so creepy..." juria: what'cha talkin' about, eyebrows? Asako: "THEM! 1-1-9!!!" *shuddering* "CREEPY CREEPY CREEPY!" >~< juria: yeah. they look like some shitty theme park knockoffs. Asako: *covers her eyes* "What are they even doing here?!" 1-1-9: *march forward past Asako and Juria, towards Souchirou's door* juria: as if i'd care....i've seen freakier shit at the old meowkies. Asako: Q~Q *crying into a puddle that has already formed at her feet* -inside- shinra: ......so, your granddaughter is here... Souchirou: "...Oh." *turns his back to Shinra* shinra:....she's right outside. Souchirou: "...Tell me more about Adora." shinra: what the hell, man?! your family is here wanting to see you, and you arent even giving a single shit?! Souchirou: "There are bigger things than family!" *turns, slamming his fist _through the desk_ * shinra: !!! why you- Souchirou: *looks up--deadly serious* "Will you burn me now?" shinra: ..........*just glares at him* (keep it together, shinra....) Souchirou: "...I'm sorry. I just want--" *BOOM* shinra: ??!!! *Flames and smoke pour in, obscuring three figures...* shinra: what the heck?! *It's 119, including the old man-face Mamoru* shinra: alright what the actual heck? Souchirou: "??? 1-1-9? We're kind of in the middle of something--" Mamoru: *rushes at Shinra* shinra: !!!! *KICK* *Mamoru is decapitated* shinra:.... !!!! carin? Carin: "..." shinra:...carin? Souchirou: *intervenes between the two* "Knock it off! Carin! There is only so much I will toler--" *PUNCH* Souchirou: *coughs up* shinra: !!!! CARIN, WHAT THE SHIT, DUDE?! YOU DONT JUST PUNCH OLD PEOPLE, EVEN IF THEY'RE CRAZY DICKS! Carin: "Kill...Kusakabe..." shinra: ???!!! Carin: "Kill..." ???: "This is perfect." shinra: *looks behind him* *The Woman smiles* Woman: "You've held so much back for so long...Give into your urges." shinra: shut up... {Carin: "Least I didn't kill my mom--"} shinra: i said shut the fuck up... Woman: "KILL HIM. RELEASE THAT BLOODLUST. KILL HIM. BURN HIM TO ASHES." shinra: i said SHUT UUUUUP!!!!! Woman: *hug* shinra: *screams* Souchirou: "!!! His feet! He's burning up!" shinra: GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HEAD!!! Souchirou: "...The Adora Burst..." *smiles* "He has it..." *reaches out his hands--* -BOOOOM- pan: ???!!! Asako: "!!!" *The doors blast open, with Souchirou kicked into the hallway* shinra: *snarls* you're not the one who's fucking in control of me... Woman: "I'm not trying to control you...I'm here to help." pan: commander, what the hell is going on? Asako: "Grandfather!" Souchirou: *stunned* "Wh-What happened?" shinra: *ROAR* Asako: "Shinra!" shinra: make it stop....MAKE IT STOP!!! Souchirou: "...No...He's possessed..." juria: tch- then i'll just beat it out of him, no big deal. *flame gauntlets* Souchirou: "Do not kill him!" juria: *ignoring and charges at him* shinra: *dodge and kicks* juria: *catches it and tosses him* -outside- charon: what do you make of it, lady haumea? guruna: *humming* Haumea: "..." *smiles* "Hitohashira Me." charon: !!!! guruna: yeah, she really hates humans, doesnt sheeee~? kururu~ but kusakabe's more resilient than we thoooought~ Haumea: "Hmm...We need her to use Shinra's anger…to release all her fury…" -back inside- -shinra and juria are still battling it out- pan: commander, arent you going to stop them?! Souchirou: "..." *grabs a rope and an axe* "I can't allow any fires in this office..." *tosses the rope around Shinra--* shinra: !!! Souchirou: "So out you go..." *runs for the window--and tosses the axe through it* -CRASH- shinra: *lands on all fours, growling* Souchirou: "Pan--the axes!" pan: *FWWWWIP* juria: *glares* i aint finished yet! *runs outside* *The woman, Hitohashira Me, speaks to Shinra...* Hitohashira Me: "You don't have to hold back..." shinra: shut up, you're not the one in control of me! Souchirou: "Kusakabe, control yourself!" *tightens the rope, pulling him closer* shinra: GRK- -FLAME KICK- Souchirou: "AAAAAAAAAAH~" juria: *gags* gross, old man. shinra: *SCREAMING* pan: COMMANDER! WHY DONT YOU DODGE?! Souchirou: =w= "I understand...I am blessed..." Asako: *running downstairs, reaching the floor* *pant pant* "G-Grandfather! Are you okay?" Souchirou: "It burns...so divinely..." Asako: "..." Q_Q pan: sir, you cant let yourself be killed like this! Souchirou: "...But I want it..." *gets up* "But I want the Fourth to survive beyond me..." shinra: *charging and screeching* juria: *PUNCH* Asako: "!!! We need a barrier! Can't someone contain them?" -lances fall from the sky, separating shinra from juria- juria: lances? heh, took you pipsqueaks long enough! Asako: "Eek!" ???: "Sorry...I got lost." ogun: sorry for being late, i had to go get backup. tamaki: ... shinra: *grunt* r..re....l....? Relan: Q~Q "Sh-Shinra?" shinra: *insane smile, but tears falling* re-l.....run...p-please..... tamaki: just stay behind us, relan, we'll make sure he doesnt die. Relan: "WHAT?!" *shaking* Asako: Q~Q Arthur: *removes Excalibur, charges it with plasma--and his hair sticks up on end* "..." pan: boyle? and....who're those two again? tamaki: dont worry about it for now. Relan: *crying* Arthur: "..." *pats his hair* "...Static electricity. It's that woman from the Nether. Again." ogun: hey, come on, buddy, everything's going to be ok. *smiles* shinra: uuuu......AHHHHHHGH!! *charges* Arthur: "Not sure about that. This electricity possesses people very easily. I don't know how to shake it out of him--" tamaki: *TAIL ATTACK* *SLAM* shinra: *knocked back* Arthur: "!!!" "Good save." tamaki: arthur! pay attention! ogun: oooi! shinra, can you hear us? shinra: make it....stop....get her out....get her out of my fucking head!! Relan: "?!!!" Arthur: "The woman from the Nether again..." juria: wait what the fuck?! ogun: !! pan: commander, fall back! Souchirou: "But I want to feel the flames!" ogun: commander pan, you're support! Arthur: "..." *light bulb* "IT'S A WITCH!" *points at Ogun* "The soldier." *points at Pan* "The medic." *points at Tamaki* "The Were-Cat." *points at Souchirou* "Masochistic shield." juria:....the fuck? ogun: dont worry about it. Asako: "NO ONE HERE IS A SHIELD, YOU FOOL!" *turns to her grandfather* "Will you wake up already?! Shinra needs your help! And you're not even listening to us!" Souchirou: "Leave me alone--This is more important--" Asako: "!!!!" *grabs an axe* "Will you listen to me?!" *takes the butt of the axe and bashes it into Souchirou's chest* juria: oh shit! Souchirou: "!!! ...A-Asako? Stop that! I am--" shinra: *charging* -on the roof- guruna: !!!!! IT'S TAMAKINS!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 Haumea: -_-# "And that awful airhead...Guruna, when this is over, rip his head off and take the cat girl for yourself." guruna: kururururururun~ of course~<3 -back on the ground- tamaki: *cold chill* urg.... Asako: *butts again* "STAY DOWN!" *grabs him under his armpits, drags him away* "I'm getting you to safety--Now!" Souchirou: *dazes* "B-But the flames..." shinra: *KICK* ogun: oof- d-dang.. pan: dont worry, im giving you all buffs. ogun: still hurts like shit. Arthur: *sighs* "Well, time for the kingly knight to do what you pleebs fail to." juria: *punching the ground, causing a fissure that cracks and heads for shinra* shinra: *dodging* Arthur: *leaps forward with Excalibur* "Time to knock that woman out of your head!" ogun: yeah! -inside Shinra's mind- shinra: *struggling* get out of my head! *attacking hitohashira-me* Hitohashira Me: *absorbs the blow...smiles sweetly* "I know what you want." shinra: just shut the hell up! *attacking, crying* Hitohashira Me: *holds him--in a hug* "Shhhh..." shinra: *trying to get away* let go of me! Hitohashira Me: "You miss her, don't you?" shinra:...... Hitohashira Me: "You've seen our power...You know what we can do...We can turn humans into Infernals...and we can turn them back. We can bring her back." shinra:....*shaking* -back to reality- Arthur: *blocking* "I'm always having to save your backside, pulling it out of the fire--" {Arthur: *about to jump off the roof* "A KNIGHT CAN FLY!"} {shinra: *yanks him back* ARE YOU STUPID OR SOMETHING?! YOU COULD HAVE DIED JUST NOW! D8< } Arthur: "And now it's time to keep hitting you in the head until that woman is out of it! Come back to us already!" *swings Excalibur* {mrs boyle: *watching the tv*} {Anchor: "--followed by food poisoning. The restaurant is under investigation now for arson and insurance fraud--"} {mrs boyle: *sighs and turns off the tv* .... arthur sweetie, dinner's almost ready, go get your father, ok?} {Arthur: "Okay..." *walks into the bedroom...it has no bedframe, just an old twin mattress, no sheets, one frayed blanket* "Hey. Dad? Dinner..."} {Mr. Boyle: *wearing a cowboy hat over his face*} {Arthur: "..." *lifts the hat* "What are you looking at in here?"} {Mr. Boyle: "??? ... “ *he chuckles*} {Arthur: "???"} {Mr. Boyle: "You always have creative ways of thinking, Arthur." *holds up the hat* "Your old man's okay...Just been looking into outer space in here."} {Arthur: "...Nah-uh!"} {Mr. Boyle: "Don't believe me?" *drops the hat over Arthur's face*} {Arthur: "?!! ...I only see blackness."} {*Suddenly, there appears--*} {Arthur: "!!! Dad! There's a castle!"} {Mr. Boyle: "Neat-o! What else?"} {Arthur: "And-and knights! And horses! And trumpets! An-And...maybe a dragon?"} {Mr. Boyle: "See? You just have to see things differently..."} {mrs boyle: what's going on in here you two-} {Mr. Boyle: *takes her hand*} {mrs boyle: *blushing* e-eh? ###, what are you doing?} {Mr. Boyle: "Treating my queen the way she deserves~" *looks at Arthur* "Come on, son--time for the ball to start..."} {-...-} {Arthur: *yawns...shivers, pulling the frayed blanket more over him*} {-the apartment is silent...-} {Arthur: "..." *looks at the blanket* ("Wasn't this...") "Dad?" *gets out of his cot, walks to the kitchen, dragging the blanket* "Mom?"} {*The kitchen is empty...There's a note on the table*} {Arthur: "???"} {note: arthur, your mama and papa have gone on a long journey to save the kingdom. you are now the king of the castle.} {Arthur: "..." *shaking* "Th-The kingdom?" *his eyes are wet* "...It was true!"} {-...-} {*knocking on the door*} {???: *female voice* ###? are you there? it's me, sandi! hello?} {Arthur: "The knight is not seeing anyone."} {???: arthur? it's your aunt sandi, may i please come in?} {Arthur: "..." *shudders* *opens the door a crack* "...Hello."} {sandi: *kneels down and smiles* hey kiddo, are your parents at home?} {Arthur: "They left."} {sandi: do you know when they'll be back? *worried* } {Arthur: *shakes his head* "Not until they save my kingdom."} {sandi: may i please come in?} {Arthur: "..." *opens the door* "Very well, Duchess."} {sandi: *she looks around the apartment, calling out for the names of her brother and sister-in-law, but is only met with silence*} {Arthur: "I said they were out. They're fulfilling their obligations to the kingdom."} {sandi:....*making some phone calls....no reply...* damn.....*looks at arthur* how long have they been out?} {Arthur: "Two sunsets."} {sandi:.....*shaking and gets onto her knees* my lord, you must pack your things. we will be going on a trip to the neighboring kingdom to complete your royal training.} {Arthur: "Ah! Fair point! I shall retrieve my possessions. But I'm without venison..."} {-...-} {sandi: hiro? hime? im home!} {Arthur: "..." *looks around* " 'Tis a fine castle."} {hime: hi arthur! *wave*} {Arthur: *small bow* "M'Lady."} {sandi: *smiles and looks at mr kenshimono* *whispers* can you him to the guest room.} {Hiro: "??? Why's he talking all funny?"} {Arthur: "How else does would a kingly knight speak?"} {Hiro: "??? Are you playing pretend? Aren't you a little old for that?"} {sandi: *takes his hand and whispers* i'll tell you in a moment, hiro.} {Mr. Kenshimono: "Right this way, you're highness."} {Arthur: ^u^ } {Hiro: -_-# } {-after arthur leaves the room, sandi sits down and looks at her children-} {sandi: your cousin's going to be staying with us for a while. your aunt and uncle have gone on a trip, and we dont know when they're coming back...} {Hiro: "But why is he talking so weird?"} {sandi: ....*shows him the note* i think it helps him cope...} Arthur: "The kingly knight defends his kingdom! That includes all within it!" ogun: ..... shinra: *charging and screaming* im not your fucking puppet! -in shinra's mind...- shinra: *slams foot into hitohashira-me's gut* GET OUT OF MY GODDAMN HEAD!!! Hitohashira Me: "UMPH! ..." *looks up...smiles...and tilts her head...way too much...* shinra: *hard glare but shaking* Hitohashira Me: "You have...no idea the level of wrath THAT YOU ARE DEALING WITH, CHILD." shinra: *he doesnt reply* Hitohashira Me: "..." *sharp inhale, smiles* "I'm fine. This is nothing I have not encountered before. Still, the other three never gave me such problems." shinra: ??? do you mean...? Hitohashira Me: "Or was it four? I lose track--they've been popping up in this time period so more frequently--!!!" *lets out a groan* "Seriously? Another one?" shinra: ??!! (more adora links? other than me, mikami, sho, and that girl?) Hitohashira Me: "I suppose that's the next one to visit..." *looks at him* "Pillars. Am I right?" shinra: what are you talking about? Hitohashira Me: "You already know, don't you? Ones like you." shinra:.........are you some kind of demon? Hitohashira: *smiles* "I don't think that's a suitable description--" *She's suddenly behind him* Hitohashira Me: "--for how limitless I am." shinra: !!! then....what the hell are you? -back to reality, shinra is still rampaging- ogun: damn, he's not letting up. tamaki: *still attacking* shinra: *ROAR* Arthur: *knocked back* "..." *holds the blade* "Three chances...That's all you get. Then, I'm killing you." Relan: "..." *shaking* tamaki: COME ON SHINRA, GET IT TOGETHER! shinra: *KICKS HER INTO THE WALL* tamaki: GRK- shinra: if it gets this devil out, then do it! Arthur: "..." *aims the sword* "..." *runs forward--* *Someone darts in front of Shinra* Arthur: "!!!" *stops just in time, as someone throws themselves over Shinra* shinra: !!! tamaki: !!!! juria: ??!! ogun: !!!! Relan: *hug* "Please...Shinra...Stop." shinra:.....*he's shaking.....and begins cackling.....taking a sharp inhale......and then breaks down sobbing* Relan: "..." *strokes his back* "It's okay..." shinra: *hic* *sobs and clings to him tightly* Relan: "..." *closes his eyes, holds onto him* -later- shinra: *laying on a medical bed in the 4th, resting his head on relan's lap* ...... 4th nurse: and that's what happened? shinra: *croaky* yes, ma'am... Relan: *strokes his head* Asako: "...The injury to your chest was not as severe." Soichiro: "..." Asako: "..." *closes her med kit* "Excuse me." *walks to another patient* Soichiro: "..." shinra: ......*shaking* -on the roof- charon: a new pillar??! Haumea: *nods* "She whispered it." -elsewhere- Akitaru: *stares at his phone* "..." *puts it down* "Maki's report only emphasizes my point: we need to mobilize all available resources." director: i have informed various companies. several seem to be on board with it, while others like haijima aren’t so keen. Akitaru: "I understand. But the new evidence--the chance of another great disaster, another Burst--that should motivate not only the brigades and our associates but the city itself." director: yes, but there are still other factors to be aware of, such as the rats, kishin worshippers, and other such groups. and there's not enough concrete evidence. Akitaru: "Sir...If this evidence is what I think it is, imagine if any of those other groups got a hold of the Bursts." director: exactly, thats why we're counting on the brigades. Akitaru: "...I understand. Thank you." *finishes his tea* "I will head out, then." -elsewhere- Master: "Here you go--some black and white cookies." Assi: "Kind of like you." mono: *nom* Assi: ^w^ *nom* "How's work been?" -elsewhere- madoka: a dance? that sounds like fun! Rin: "Exactly! You up for it?" madoka: *she nods* i heard CyariS and Kirafina will be there two, those are two of my favorite groups! -elsewhere- shura:....hmm, there you are. Takara: "..." -elsewhere- Shima: T~T konekomaru: *pap pap* Bon: "The reason no one wants to go with you is, A, the perv factor, B, the annoyance factor, and C--" Shima: "I'm too handsome?" TwT Bon: "...Yeah. Let's go with that." -elsewhere- Arthur: "Does it still hurt?" tamaki: i-i think i'll be fine Arthur: *nods* "It was scary, wasn't it?" tamaki: ....yeah..... Arthur: "..." *hug* tamaki:....*hugs* Arthur: *pat pat* "You're okay..." tamaki:....yeah... {???: worthless whore, your mother should never have given birth to you!} tamaki: ..... Arthur: "Tamaki?" tamaki: hmm? n-nothing. -elsewhere- Akutagawa: *shifts, wincing* kan: easy now. *giving him some toast* i made toast. Akutagawa: "...Thank you." *takes it* "...Your friend will be having me leave today?" kan: likely...how're you feeling? any better? Akutagawa: "A bit..." *looks at the shirt he was given* "...What kind of fashion sense is this?" kan: it's a t-shirt. Akutagawa: "...What's a 'YOLO'?" kan: *sweatdrop* Akutagawa: "..." *gets out of bed, limps* "I suppose I need to return the shirt, then." kan: easy now. -elsewhere- Relan: "..." shinra: *holding onto him* Relan: "I'm sorry..." *supporting him* shinra: you didnt....do anything wrong..... Relan: "And neither did you. What happened back there...was not you." shinra: i know.....*trembling* im scared of myself.... Relan: "..." *hug* shinra: *sniff* theres almost a small part of me that wishes i was back in the pantry....that way, that demon lady or whatever she is, cant get to me....r-right? Relan: "Shinra...No. That was abuse. That doesn't help anyone." shinra: i know....and i'd still take that over being possessed..... *smiling, but crying* Relan: "..." *cries, holding onto him* iris:..... -elsewhere- Kafka: *standing with his arms on walking beams to bring back strength to his legs* hans: at least he's doing better than he was. Walter: *nods* "That's one thing about Kafka--he's stubborn. Isn't that right, Harriet?" harriet: *chameleon sounds* Walter: "Harriet agrees." hans: ^^; Kafka: *slight stumble, but still holding onto the beams* hans: your doing good. Kafka: "It-It's not p-perfect...This progress is 23.7 percent slower than last time..." hans: just remember to breathe. we dont want you passing out like last time. Kafka: "..." *nods* "...I imagine Goethe is upset with me not being there to finish my work." hans: at worst, he's annoyed. leroux: despite the whole hughes fiasco, lord goethe is rather lenient. Walter: "And the work wasn't too much--I was able to finish your part of it lickety-split!" Kafka: "!!!! ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME LOOK BAD?! If you're able to do my work that quickly, then I'm e-easily r-r-replaceable!" hans: kafka, inhale! Kafka: *DEEP INHALE* "..." *falls dramatically onto the cushiony pillowy floor* hans: *sigh* -elsewhere- Alone: *tossing a ball against the wall--and chasing after it himself* grimoire: ..... Alone: "Want to toss it for me?" grimoire:...*toss* Alone: ^w^ *barks happily as he chases after the ball* "Ball ball ball ball!" grimoire: ... (he's so amused by the most simple things...) Alone: "Now Shaula--you throw it!" shaula: *throws it. right into his face* Alone: "UMPH!" *concave face* "...Stressed?" shaula: no, its just a bit chilly out and IM STILL IN PRISON! Alone: "...Huh. Kind of surprised Beatrice hasn't busted you out." shaula: she will soon! >3< Alone: "Could she take us with her?" shaula: ... *shrug* Alone: QwQ *puppy begging noises* shaula: *rolls eyes* eh sure. Alone: *SQUEE* >w< shaula: shhh keep it down! Alone: .w. *small squee* -elsewhere- Kyoka: "Maybe this?" *holds up a t-shirt with a kitty* sylvia: um... Kyoka: "Not a big t-shirt person, huh? How about jewelry?" sylvia: i-i guess....i dont...w-wear a lot, though... Kyoka: "...Maybe something to pull back your hair?" sylvia: m-maybe.... Kyoka: "...This one has a flower." sylvia: pretty.... Kyoka: "Let's try it." *hands it to her* sylvia: its.......cute. Kyoka: *smiles* "It suits you." sylvia:... *small blush* t-thank you...miss kyouka... Kyoka: "You're welcome. We'll go pay for it. Or did you want to grab something else? Maybe a dress?" -elsewhere- Steinbeck: *running for his life* "I SAID _NOT_ TO STEP ON THE SQUARE TILES!" *poison darts are coming out of the walls at them* twain: *SCREEEEAM* oscar: OwO;;;;; Hemingway: *grabs a shield from a skeleton, blocks the darts from hitting them...then notices the skeletal arm still on it* "...Ew." *tosses back the arm* twain: at least there's no boulders after us! *RUMBLE* Steinbeck: "..." Hemingway: "..." emily: twain......REALLY?! *A boulder is now after them* Steinbeck: "I HATE YOU SO MUCH!!!" twain: YOU HAVE TO HAVE A BOULDER CHASE SCENE IN A TEMPLE ESCAPE! IT'S THE LAW! Steinbeck: "SO IS HUMAN SACRIFICE!" *picks up Twain* -fortunately, they made it out with no one dying- Hemingway: "Th-Thank goodness you're all light-weight..." *pulls out a flask, sips* baum: glad you're all back safe. twain: *hands steinbeck his granola bar as a peace offering* OuO Steinbeck: "...If we did not need every last bit of food we have left, I would beat you with this granola bar." emily: well, we'll be heading home soon. oscar: thats wonderful, feels like we've been out here for years. Steinbeck: *grumble grumble* -elsewhere- Victor: "--and that's about what's new. He's really freaking out." scarlet:...... ivy: sucks for him. *sips drink* Victor: owO;; "...That's kinda mean..." scarlet: and all misora's been whining about is the 7th commander's engagement. ivy: she should just accept that he's completly out of her league and get over it. Victor: "Hmm...Maybe get her a date. Or a hobby." scarlet: you mean besides indulging in fantasies of being an idol? Victor: "...Maybe she should try a talent show." scarlet: i'll see what we can find. Victor: ^w^ "...So, where's the boss?" -elsewhere- Black Star: "Dig in, buddy!" lilac: *nom* Black Star: "So Soul, catch up on your Z's?" soul: yeah. getting there. Black Star: "At least you can put that mission in your file. Had to be better than other ones..." soul: i guess so. long one, though. Black Star: "No kidding. You in Germany was about as long as Tsubaki and me in Japan." *gobbles up his pizza, talks with his mouth full* "Take in any shows?" -soul tells them about his mission- Black Star: "...Dude...That's crazy. You ever find out what happened to that dancer?" soul: *shrug* naho: jeez, if you were habing that much trouble with the language, maybe sham could have given you lessons. otogiri:..... Shamrock: X_-; "I'm...not the best teacher." *sips* "Although those ruffians sounded most uncouth." soul: it was freaky. Sakuya: "Sound like it. Those abilities...What'll they think of next." soul:.... *side glance* who knows, sakuya. who fucking knows. -elsewhere- Dazai: "I HAVE GAINED A NEW ABILITY!" yosano: do i dare ask? Dazai: "I have learned diaper changing!" *holds up a teddy bear with a diaper on it* yosano: congrats. ranpo: .....should i tell him, or let it be a surprise? Kunikida: "Don't. I want to savor his humiliation." Dazai: =w= "Now to try treatments for skin rashes! Atsushi, pull down your pants--" atsushi: WHAT NO! D8> Dazai: "Tanizaki--" Tanizaki: "With every bit of respect owed to you, fuck no." Dazai: "Well, I'm all out of people, then." *throws the teddy bear over his shoulder--landing in Kunikida's face* Kunikida: "..." fukuzawa: *from his office* did he just throw the goddamn baby? atsushi: so much is wrong this this scenario. *sweatdrop* Dazai: "It wasn't really a baby--it was just a dummy baby." yosano: *hitting dazai with a rolled-up newspaper* YOU DONT. THROW. BABIES! oh, seems the 7th brigade commander's engaged now. -elsewhere- Fitzgerald: "Everyone doing well?" louisa: yes sir. mary: yep! bram: *urg*, been better. =~=;;; Mr. Tsubaki: *nuzzles against Bram* Fitzgerald: "Oh dear...Need water?" bram: yes please. Fitzgerald: "Owl Eyes! Fetch me the finest mineral water from the mini fridge!" Owl Eyes: ( - ) _ ( - ); *opens the mini-fridge...that is right next to Fitzgerald's foot* -elsewhere- Panda: *wearing headphones, singing along* "Makin' G's, gettin' honeys, running down the streets--" sasori: ...... inka: *whistling along* Sancho: *adding a beat* sasori: -_____- remind me what we're doing here again? Panda: "They say we blow up--BLOW UP! Blasting through this town. They say we blow up--BLOW UP--" sasori:.....fine, ignore me then. -_-# Sancho: *pulls off Panda's headphones* "Simple--Inka smelled something." inka: here we are. Panda: "Huh. How much you think they got?" sasori: a warehouse? inka: who knows. sasori, scout out for us. sasori: *enters the building* ..... Panda: "Wow...Boxes!" inka: boooriiing....(still, i know i smelt something here.....) sasori:....*glance and snarls, firey scorpion tail out* Panda: owo "What is it, girl? Trouble at the well?" sasori: dont patronize me........someones here... Sancho: "..." *peeks around a corner* *A flaming dart is coming towards Sancho's face* Sancho: "..." *stone faced* -SLASH- sasori: *slashes the dart away* Sancho: "..." *sharp inhale* "..." *LOUD HIGH-PITCHED SCREAM as he jumps into Panda's arms* Panda: "?!! Dude!" inka: what the fuck?! *looks* ???: well well, what have we here? some low grade hoods? ???: "They wrecked my freaking dart!" Panda: "Hey! We're _high_ grade!" Sancho: "Or just high." Panda: *high five* ???: stop your whining, mantis. Mantis: >3< "YOU NEVER LET ME HAVE ANY FUN!" inka: who're you assholes anyway? Mantis: "..." *licks lips* "We could ask you the same, interlopers!" inka: we're from this small town called nanaya. Mantis: "Good--now we know WHERE TO MAIL YOUR ASHES!" Panda: "...'Nanaya'?" inka: yeah. nanaya business. [as in ‘none of your business] Mantis: >_< "LET ME RIP HER ARM OFF AND BEAT THE PANDA WITH IT!" Panda: .w. ???: hehehe, i dunno, the tall guy's kinda cute~<3 Sancho: .\\\\\\. pixie: *wink* *flame devil tail twitches in a 'come on over' fashion* Sancho: "..." *glances at Inka* inka: bad sancho, dont be distracted by the cute demon girl Sancho: >\\\\\< "I'm not distracted! I'm conflicted--there's a difference!" ???: pixie, you're shameless. -_-; pixie: hehe~ ???: given how you act, im surprised you arent the oni of lust. pixie: well, they've more than earned that title~ inka: wait, oni-....you guys are with the hell blaze gang, right?! ???: yes. i am taoka, oni of sloth. inka: *grins* YOU GUYS SUUUUCK! Panda: OwO; Sancho: "REALLY?! Right now?!" taoka: *weapon out* Panda: "Sic 'em, Sasori!" sasori: *charges at them* Mantis: *chitters, summoning flame-pincers* sasori: *flame scorpion pincers and tail slash* Mantis: *swings a pincer to block the slash, just barely dodging the pincers* "!!! Stop stealing my schtick!" *tries to grab Sasori* -KICK TO THE FACE- Mantis: "UMPH!" *knocked back* sasori: judging by what that girl called you, mantises and scorpions are two different things. Panda: "Woot! Now kick them in the painful bits!" -elsewhere- Vulcan: "This is just not good..." yu: ? what isnt? Vulcan: "It's just...another person here getting screwed over by...whatever fucking Giovanni..." yu: ......is lisa doing better? i had a nightmare about her last night.... Vulcan: "..." *pours some milk* "She's doing as best as she can. Want to talk?" yu: ....she was....in the bathroom, bleeding on the floor and shaking......there was a red blobby thing in front of her with a hanger stuck in it.... Vulcan: "...Yu..." yu: y-you dont think she.....she was....d-do you? Vulcan: "I don't know...It's not for us to know. Lisa gets to decide what she wants to talk about." yu:....r-right...... lisa: ......... -elsewhere- Kid: "Okay...Open." stocking: *opens her eyes* *Kid has made a tiny Stocking cake* stocking: oh my gosh that is so cute! Kid: ^\\\^ "I-I was worried you would think this was corny." stocking:... *takes a bite*..........*serious face* i taste delicious. Kid: "..." *small laugh, blushing* stocking: *huuugs* Kid: *hug* "I'm glad you like it, sweetie." stocking: *KISSSSS* Kid: "Mmmm!" >\\\\< stocking: hehe~<3 Kid: "..." *licks his lips slightly* "You're right. You are delicious." stocking: hmhmhm~ *whispers* better lock the door, babe~ Kid: "..." *doesn't let go of her, as he leans back and locks it* -elsewhere- Tsuyuki: *flipping through pages* tinker: *making adjustments to robo-chan* Tsuyuki: *not even looking behind him* "How is the progress?" tinker: looking good. ^^ Tsuyuki: "What is the next task you are giving your creation?" tinker: instant livestream button. Tsuyuki: "..." *lifts his head, turns* "What?" tinker: *dead serious* instant. livestream. button. Tsuyuki: "Why. Do. You. Need. One?" tinker: for my vlog! Tsuyuki: "..." -____- "Don't you think we need to be a little more covert?" tinker: its not public, it's on C3's private server! -elsewhere- Panda: "THIS IS CRAAAAAAAZY!" >w< Sancho: Q____Q *running as fast as he can* inka: *driving the golf-cart* WOOOOOHOOOOO!!!! taoka: *running after them* Mantis: "GET BACK HERE!" *throws another flaming dart* pixie: aw, we were having fuuuun, dont go nooow~ sasori: *BLOCKING* Sancho: *leaps, grabbing the edge of the golf cart--and getting dragged behind* D: "AAAAAAAAAH!" Mantis: "I'LL SLICE YOUR TAIL OFF, YOU DAMN SCORPION!" sasori: <how annoying...> Panda: "Sasori! Flip them the bird! They love that!" sasori: *middle fingers up* Mantis: "..." *LOUD SCREECH--flame pinchers come up in _front_ of the golf cart_* inka: OwO HOLY FUCK. Mantis: "WE GOT YOU NOW!" Sancho: "WE'RE GONNA DIE!" Panda: .w. "Hey, Sasori? Can you, like, make a flaming ramp or something?" sasori: no. Panda: "Oh...WE'RE GONNA DIE!" >w< inka: *EPIC DRIFTING* Panda: *slow motion* "Wooooooooooow--" Sancho: *slow motion* "BLAAAAAAARG-" *covering his mouth* sasori: -____________________- Mantis: "?!!!" "ONE OF YOU--DO SOMETHING! BLOW UP THEIR ELECTRIC CART!" -elsewhere- Souichirou: "..." ogun: he hasnt said anything..... Carin: *holding ice to his head* "Then ask Pan to talk to him..." -elsewhere- Johannes: *muttering* metsu: ?? Johannes: "..." *sneers* "That's...it." *writes something down* metsu:....doctor? Johannes: "???" *smiles* "Yes~?" metsu: did you need anything? *glances* *The notes refer to a "solution"* Johannes: "I think...this calls for something to celebrate. Fetch the sugar-only cola." metsu: ._.; -elsewhere- Chuuya: "..." higuchi: i brought snacks if anyone's hungry. Motojiro: *raises a hand* katya: thanks! Gin: "..." -elsewhere- kan: hey, you mentioned 'gin'. who is that? Akutagawa: "...My sister." kan: ah....must be nice having siblings... Akutagawa: "...You are an only child?" kan: yeah.. Akutagawa: "Hmm. ...Any family?" kan:......my dad was murdered. Akutagawa: "!!!" kan: ....sorry, i guess that was a bit much to say all at once, huh? Akutagawa: "...Can't be helped. I'm sorry." kan: .....do you know where your sister is now? Akutagawa: "..." *shakes his head* kan: well, i hope she's alright. *smile* Akutagawa: *nods* "Likewise..." -elsewhere- Walter: "Should be back at 100 percent soon! Or at least 80 percent." goethe: good for him.... <damn, out of wine again...> Walter: "Need us to pick up groceries?" goethe: <yes.> Walter: " 'Kay. Anything, Hans? Kids?" wilhelm: cookies! Jakob: "Lots of them!" Walter: "Right on!" etta: and new lipstick! Walter: "Oh! But which color would look best on you?" -elsewhere- elizaveta: *walking along, holding her doll and humming* *A small chuckle is heard in the alley* elizaveta: !!!! *rushes in* *Light singing is heard* ???: <The thieving magpie cooked the porridge, fed it to the little children...> elizaveta: <KOLYA!!> Gogol: <Is that you?> -TACKLE HUG- elizaveta: >w< Gogol: *bones cracking* QwQ "Yep! Definitely y-you!" elizaveta: leila missed you too! 'leila': oi oi! good to see ya! Gogol: .w.; "...I...see... *ahem* Ready to rejoin the others?" elizaveta: *nod nod* is mr dosty still locked up? Gogol: "Yep...He'll get out soon, right?" elizaveta: yeah! but until then, can i show vanyusha my trick? Gogol: "Go for it!" elizaveta: yay! *click* *speaking in fyodor's voice* im sure he'll be happy with that. Gogol: .w. "...That will either speed up his recovery or turn him into a puddle of goo. Either way, I'M HAPPY!" elizaveta: *click* *normal voice* is he sick? Gogol: "He got his ass kicked." elizaveta: ouch. Gogol: "Yep. That attack on the Mafia could've gone better..." -elsewhere- Kid: =w= "That was so good..." stocking: *panting* Kid: "Are you okay?" *spoons with her* stocking: still feeling good. *rubs her butt against him* Kid: *moans* "St-Stocking..." *rubs against her slightly, his hand reaching around her* stocking: oh~ up for round 2 already~? Kid: "Depends~" *his thumb rests along her clitoris* *he's a bit hard against her* stocking: kid...i want you to take me from behind. Kid: "..." *leans to her ear* "Yes..." *coaxes her to her knees--with a small spank* stocking: *small moan* Kid: *he leans over her, one hand holding her breast, as his finger massages along her lips* -elsewhere- twain: *shaking Steinbeck awake* steinbeck. steinbeeeeck.... Steinbeck: *groans* "Not the dust...I just planted..." twain: dude, wake up. Steinbeck: *opens his eyes* "...What the hell?" twain: i just had a really fucked up thought. Steinbeck: "...Dare I ask?" twain: what if....fitzgerald had a mustache? Steinbeck: "...What time is it?" twain: 4 in the morning. Steinbeck: "..." *grabs Twain by the neck* twain: GRK- OwO;;; Steinbeck: *and tosses him across the ground and into the river* twain: that's fair! -morning- Akutagawa: "..." *checks his wallet* -yep, everything is still there as he left it- Akutagawa: "..." *takes out a $100 bill* "Here. I'm sorry for the inconvenience I caused." kan: woah, is this really alright, ryu? Akutagawa: "It is not whether it is alright: it is what is fair...Or is it not fair? Did you want more?" kan: it would be wrong to ask you for more when you're already offering this much. ^^; Akutagawa: "...Sorry for being a bother. I will leave now."' kan: good luck, ryu. maybe we'll meet again someday. ^^ Akutagawa: "..." *nods* *looks at his shirt* "...Oh. I should return this--" *starts to take it off* -elsewhere- Akitaru: "Ready for the company meeting?" miwa: *nods* Akitaru: "Okay...I'm giving Shinra the day off. I'm still trying to find the others...Anyone seen Tamaki?" tamaki: here sir. Akitaru: *nods* "Okay. I wanted to review with all of you where we are after Shinra's report." tamaki: *nods* Akitaru: "Arthur reported sensing electrical discharge, suggesting the Hoods had a hand in this. Did you see any evidence of their presence?" tamaki:....just a cold chill.....i think that creepy girl i encountered was there too.... Akitaru: "!!! For real?" tamaki: *tenses...and nods* Akitaru: *sighs* "All the more reason to be on alert. I don't like the any of you being on your own out there, so you'll have to buddy up again." tamaki: *salutes* understood. Akitaru: "Onto other business, Doc, how is work on your mech?" karin: coming along great. just fixed the engines and she should be ready to roll. Akitaru: "Let me know when you conduct the test--I want to check it out. I think we're going to need it sooner than expected. Maki, I want you to keep the newer soldiers' combat training on schedule." maki: yes sir! Akitaru: "Nozomi, any luck tracking the Hoods?" -elsewhere- Medusa: *reclines in seat* "..." neian: zzz Medusa: *rocks gently* -elsewhere- Daisy: "Yo, TJ--how's it hanging?" eckleburg: ?? oh, miss daisy, thought you were jordan for a moment. ^^' Daisy: "??? Well, now I just feel insulted." Death the Kid joined the chat 16 minutes ago jordan: hey! -elsewhere- Spirit: "What day would be good? Sachiko wanted to see you and Jackie again." kim: maybe this weekend? Spirit: "Sounds good. Care to pick up some dessert?" kim: will do, anything in mind? Spirit: "Can't go wrong with cookies--Izumi loves them in variety. Even the cheaper ones..." kim: alright then. Spirit: "Thanks. See you both then!" -elsewhere- Mephisto: "Happy birthday to the most perfect child." felisia: ^^ stocking: aww, guys. ^^ Mephisto: "Your mother put in a lot of work on something for you..." felisia: ta-dah~ -it's a comforter- stocking: aww, thanks mom! *hug* Mephisto: *group hug* stocking: any idea what his name's going to be? felisia: still thinking on that. Mephisto: "Mephy Jr~?" stocking: dad. -_-; Mephisto: "Kidding! Mostly..." stocking: *sweatdrop* Mephisto: *ahem* "And is Kid taking you out tonight?" stocking: *she nods* Mephisto: "Then enjoy your day of birth." *forehead kiss* stocking: ^u^ -elsewhere- Sancho: *asleep on the couch--hugging a teddy bear* "N-No, don't...You don't have a golf cart license..." Panda: *asleep on the rug--scratching himself with his foot like a dog* inka: *asleep in a hammock* nnn...... sasori: *awake, keeping watch* ....... {girl: *crying* <IT HURTS! IT HURTS!>} {shaula: hold still, brat, it wont take long if you quit struggling!} sasori: ....... Panda: *dog yawn* *smacks his mouth* "...I'm dehydrated. Time for Dew!" *looks* "Want some? Or are you a Crystal Pepsi girl?" sasori: .....i dont care. -elsewhere- Akutagawa: *walking* ???: psssst, akuta! Akutagawa: *presses against the wall, ready to attack* naoya: *waves him into the alley* Akutagawa: "..." *approaches* "Where have you been?" naoya: we could ask you the same question! now come on, its not safe out here.... Akutagawa: "..." *follows* "The others..." naoya: somewhere safe. gin's worried sick about you... Akutagawa: *nearly passes out* "Thank God..." naoya: easy there!......how bad are your injuries? Akutagawa: "Bad enough...I need sleep..." naoya: here, get up onto my back. Akutagawa: *crawls up* "Embarrassing..." naoya:...what happened to your coat? Akutagawa: "...I lost it in the attack...and the fall...and I don't know." naoya: .....well, we'll find you a spare for now.... Akutagawa: "Hmph...Can't be any worse than other fashion choices." -underground- Gin: *shaking him* "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW WORRIED I WAS--" higuchi: *smacks akutagawa in the face* WE THOUGHT YOU SERIOUSLY DIED OR- Akutagawa: *rattled* "I. AM. SOR. RY. St-Stop--My kidney still hurts!" kouyou: girls, there's enough to yell at him later after he's healed. for now, get him to medical. Akutagawa: TT~TT "I'm sorry..." katya: jeez, who fucked you up in there? Akutagawa: "...A big dog." katya: oh? Akutagawa: *shudders* "I now hate them more than before..." pushkin: was it big and shadowy looking? Akutagawa: "..." *nods* pushkin: then i think you might have seen one of lydia's beasts. Akutagawa: "Hmph. Ferocious." -elsewhere- elizaveta: hiiiiiiii everyooooone~<3 lydia: <vetya, glad to see you're well.> elizaveta: yep. *giggles* *click* *fyodor voice* <oh vaaaanyaaaa~> *Loud footsteps are heard--running quickly* lydia: *sigh* Ivan: "I KNEW YOU WOULD RETURN, MY MASTER!!!" elizaveta: *click* *normal voice* hi. ^^ Ivan: "..." QwQ <Vetya, whyyyyyyyy?> elizaveta: <i thought it would be funny.> ^^ lydia: *chop* <dont do that.> elizaveta: >3< Q: ?? Adam: "??? Who's she?" elizaveta: who's that guy? and the boy? and the lady? zoey: ........? Ivan: <Fire person, psycho child, bitch whore.> elizaveta: ooooooh hehehehehe. Q: uncle ivan, who's the new girl? elizaveta: im elizaveta akmatova, im 14! Q: im 14 too! Ivan: >3< <Whoop dee doo...> zoey: how sweet, my baby...has a friend now. ^^ Ivan: *trying not to vomit* -elsewhere- Hyde: "How much you trying to make anyway?" ochako: right now, enough for camping supplies this summer. Hyde: "Yeah, you UA students are going to be doing roasted marshmallows while camping?" ochako: you bet! Hyde: "Well, not to get your hopes down, but that's gonna be a few hours of work to get it all. Didn't want to borrow someone's camping gear?" ochako: i guess it makes more sense to work hard for something, right? Hyde: "...Yeah. You're right." ochako:... ?? Hyde: "Sorry...Just thinking about what work I'm doing. When you work with someone who's got all the attention, you feel like you're falling behind..." ochako: i guess. -elsewhere- itsuka: alright. epic hamster ball race, featuring django, sybil and chacha, take one. Bakugo: ._. tetsutetsu: ok, filming begins in 3. 2. go! -elsewhere- shiemi: *studying* izumo: hmm..... Paku: "So...excited about the festival?" shiemi: yeah. im thinking about asking yuki to go with me. izumo: *rolls eyes* Paku: *small gasp* "Dating your teacher?" shiemi: paku! *shhhhhh* izumo: he's still the same age as us. -_-; Paku: "Still..." *smiles* "I hope he says yes, Shiemi." shiemi: r-right...so, did you ask anyone, or did anyone ask you? Paku: =\\\\= izumo: ?? Paku: "Shima...did ask." izumo: SHIMA?!?! Paku: "To be fair, I'm pretty sure he asked everyone." ^\\\^; izumo: he did. -_-; he even asked girls that dont even _go_ to our school. i think he even asked a collage senior. Paku: "He may not be good in his lessons, but when it comes to dating, he's persistent. But that's a bit too much for me, so I declined." izumo: *sigh of relief* oh thats good, i nearly had a heart attack. shiemi: maybe you could ask godaiin? Paku: "???" *looks around--then points at herself* shiemi: *nod nod* Paku: "I mean, I would--but he hasn't asked me...Is he even going?" izumo: heck if i know. shiemi: then lets ask him then? izumo: right now?! Paku: .\\\\. shiemi: come on. ^^ izumo:....*siiiiiiiiighs* unbelievable. Paku: "I-I just thought we had studying to do and--" *spots Godaiin* "!!!" godaiin: *reading* Paku: "...HELLO GODAIIN!" *covers her mouth* .\\\\. godaiin: um.. hi paku. w-whats up? Paku: "..." *tries to play it cool* "The ceiling!" *points at him with both index fingers* godaiin: um..*looks up* yeah, the ceiling is definitly up there. Paku: ^\\\\\\^;;;; "So...You heard about that festival...thingie?" godaiin: yeah. thats later in the month i think? Paku: "Yep...You going?" godaiin: i guess so? Paku: "...With anyone?" godaiin: not really. Paku: "...Want to go with me?" godaiin:...... O///////////////////////////////////////O EGG! Paku: "?! Egg?" *pictures Godaiin as a chicken popping out of an egg* godaiin: I MEAN- YEAH! SURE! SEE YOU THERE? Paku: "YES! SEE YOU THERE!" shiemi: success! Paku: ^\\\\^; *stiff walking* "..." *whispers* "Oh God, I thought I was going to pass out..." Student: -_-# ("Does no one keep quiet in a library?") -elsewhere- Bon: "..." *pokes the bed* "Get up and stop moping!" Shima: >~< konekomaru: *has a fist bruise on his face* i didnt think that would insult her.... Bon: "You two need help! Like, can't we have someone advise you on how to ask people properly on a date?!" Shima: *sits up in bed* "Like you're one to talk! You can't get a date either!" Bon: .____. -and so- sayaka: *hands them a game; specifically, a dating sim.* Shima: "...Sweet! Thank you!" Bon: "You got to be kidding me! How is this going to help us?!" konekomaru: i see, by using the game, it might help us with real life? sayaka: yep! it even comes with a player's guide inside it too! Shima: *staring at the drawings of the characters* "...Video games just got so much better than when I was a kid!" Bon: -_-# "...Let's just get this over with." konekomaru: i'll get it installed. you're a livesaver, miki! -and so- Bon: "...Why is he giving us tickets?" konekomaru: maybe ask him for help? Shima: *selecting the option* "Okay, bro--can you help us get a date?" [tomoda: hoho, so you want to know your current popularity ranking, eh? here's how you rate so far!] -the girls shown are a sweet looking girl resembling a brunette shiemi, a girl with twintails, a girl with long lavender hair, and a cute girl with glasses- konekomaru: so we have the childhood friend type, the tsundere class rep type, the mysterious transfer student, and the clumsy nurse's aid. Shima: "...Ah, man--so many options! The brunette is so pretty--but that twintail girl is probably a real vixen! And I bet the clumsy girl--" Bon: *chop* "No." Shima: >_<# "But we got to pick one, man! Konekomaru, which one?" konekomaru: hmm. not sure. but why is tomoda helping us? Shima: "To move the game along." Bon: "No...No, there's a deeper reason. Let's keep going..." konekomaru: i guess. this one then. [haruna: *the childhood friend* hm? oh, ShiBonKo! good morning. ^^] konekomaru: ok, now what do i do? Bon: "Say hello to her." [-hey haruna-] [tomoda: morning you two! you lovebirds walking to school together, haha!] [haruna: e-eh? tomoda, its not like that! >///<; ] konekomaru: hey guys....i just had a thought. Bon: "Y-Yeah?" Shima: ._. konekomaru: maybe, tomoda has a crush on the player? Bon: "..." Shima: "..." Bon: "...That makes perfect sense." Shima: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAND I'M DONE." konekomaru: SHIMA. SIT. BEHAVE. Shima: >3< "I'm here for the ladies, not Tomoda--" Bon: "SIT DOWN AND KEEP PLAYING!" Shima: *grumbles* *proceeds* -as they keep going, one could see how much tomoda cares for the player- [tomoda: you know, im glad i met you, ShiBonKo.] [end credits roll] konekomaru: ........... Bon: "......" Shima: "......." konekomaru: t-..to..- bon + shima + konekomaru: TOMODAAAAAAAA!!!! TT______TT Bon: "WHY DID YOU GIVE UP YOUR HAPPINESS FOR US?!" Shima: "WE DIDN'T EVEN SCOOOOOOORE!" konekomaru: YOU IDIOT! YOU SHOULD HAVE ENJOYED YOUR YOUTH TOO!!! TT~TT Bon: "HE GAVE UP SO MUCH FOR US--AND WE CAN'T EVEN REPAY HIM!" Shima: "NO! We _will_ repay him!" konekomaru: *NODS* WE'LL GIVE HIM HIS HAPPY ENDING IN DOUJIN FORM!! Shima: "YEAH! ...Wait, what? I meant we'd go get dates--" Bon: *already putting out the paper and pencils* "We get to work now!" konekomaru: RIGHT NOW WE NEED TO FOCUS ON TOMODA'S FEELINGS! -one setting up of supplies later- konekomaru: *checking player guide* alright, so who should tomoda's love interest be for this scenario? Shima: "Pick the girl with the money." konekomaru: you mean kaorin? that would be the class rep. i supposed their interactions would make an interesting comedy... Bon: "But is that really taking Tomoda's feelings into consideration?" konekomaru: !! you're right! i wasnt thinking right! im such a fool! TT^TT Bon: "It's okay--we know Tomoda has a big heart and will forgive...Instead, let's find the person who makes Tomoda the most happy." konekomaru: hmmm, *re-reading tomoda's bio* lets see....someone who tomoda would be happy with... Bon: "...even during three years...that he'd be devoted to for so long--" Shima: "...Who'd make him happy..." konekomaru:....!!!!! of course, it was right in front of us the whole time! Bon: "You're right! It's--It's--" All three:  THE MAIN PLAYER CHARACTER!!! -morning- Rin: *knocks* "...Bon? Come on! I need to borrow your homework!" madoka: maybe they're out? *tries the knob. it opens* ?? guys? ... !!!!! konekomaru: *passed out* zzzzz Bon: "Zzzz..." *his head on the table* Shima: "Zzz...D-Devoted..." Rin: "..." *whispers* "I think they had a sleepover--without me! I'm so bummed!" konekomaru: nyehu? *his glasses are sideways* oh...hey rin, hey madoka. *yaaaawn* madoka: what happened in here? Rin: *picks up a paper* madoka:..... o.o is this......? "ShiBonKo": "Can't you see? I LOVE YOU MORE THAN 12 GIRLS!" "tomoda": ah....*crying* i dont get it, i would have just been content supporting you. madoka: .-. *blinks* Rin: ._.; "...Guys...The shading is all wrong in this panel." -elsewhere-

[human-oddity88]

Love and Self Loathing

ON LOVE AND SELF LOATHING

“You cant love someone until you love yourself first” Bullshit. I have never loved myself. But you. Oh god, I loved you so much I forgot what hating myself felt like.” Unknown

I was bullied. When I say this I don’t mean the cute innocent teasing portrayed in sitcoms and in movies. I mean the kind of bullying that sent me home in tears everyday from school. The kind of bullying that left me with emotional problems similar to those who grew up in abusive households. The kind of bullying that made me obsessed as a teenager with finding the quickest and most painless way to kill myself. There was literally nothing about my body, my thoughts, my past or my present that they couldn’t/didn’t use as a Knife to cut me. But the worst part was that the adults in my life either didn’t care at all, or even if they did care offered no real solutions. I spent years hearing the same old hallow tired advice like “just ignore them” (easy to do while people you’ve gone to school with your entire life pick your life apart like they’re dissecting a frog), “they’re just jealous” (trust me they aren’t), “just try to be more normal” (tried every day for 16 years and the more I tried to abandon myself for the sake of fitting in the less I did). Ultimately the bullying became so harmful l that I, an A to B student with real potential, dropped out of high school at 16 because I knew if I had to endure another 3 years of abuse my unsuccessful suicide attempts would eventually become a successful one. Bullying kills kids like me every day. Kids who are different like I was, kids who are overweight, LGBT, part of a racial and/or religious minority, or if they are in any other way strikingly different from their peers. In my case I was a strange combination of the above. I can’t even explain how much heartbreak I feel when I read yet another story on Facebook about a high school kid who killed themselves as a result of bullying. I feel myself die inside very time I read another name or see another picture. I know exactly what those poor souls were thinking as they took their own lives, because I thought the same thing. I could write a novel, hell a series of novels about the bullying that I had to endure, and about my adolescent self trying to cope with it. But I’m way more interested in writing about afterwards. What it’s like as a young adult trying to build a life based on such negative and self loathing social interactions. To show people that may be struggling even as they read this, that it really does get better. The bullying that I endured left me with many certainties about myself. I was ugly. I was worthless. No one would ever love me. These certainties didn’t keep me up at night or bring me to tears everyday they were simply facts like the description of a cell in a biology textbook. It has been studied, and verified by enough scientists that it can now be accepted as unquestionably true. I was surrounded by people who loved me. My friends and my family, and they fought to convince me that I was beautiful and worthwhile. But despite their valiant efforts I entered adulthood I with zero self esteem and even less confidence. A girl who had once been loud and passionate had become quiet and subdued. The bright Colors I once wore because I’m an ostentatious person had been replaced with dark colors that helped me blend in. When I was 18 I got my very first real boyfriend. He loved me. He thought I was pretty. He was with me on purpose. My mind couldn’t comprehend any of that. I kept waiting for him to realize all the things about me that I already accepted as fact. But he didn’t. It was a shock to my system. Our relationship was not perfect. he was the person I lost my virginity to, and as I became sexually active I realized new and amazing things about myself. Chief among those was the fact that I have an extremely high sex drive. My boyfriend however had an extremely low sex drive. Night after night I would try to initiate sex with him, and he would make excuse after excuse as to why tonight wasn’t a good night for him. On the nights we did have sex, it only happened after begging, when he would give in with a long exasperated sigh, and seem about as excited about it as you might be to take out the trash or get a root canal. After years of this I started wondering if I was the problem. Was I so ugly and repulsive that my own husband didn’t want me? Those Thoughts haunted me throughout my marriage. There were plenty of other problems in our relationship as well, such as the fact that as a result of his Asperger’s Syndrome he could never be my partner, more of an overgrown child who needed a live in Nanny, first in the form of his mother and then me. If I had not been bullied. If I had not been convinced over the course of my entire academic career that I was ugly worthless and that no one would ever love me, I probably would have left my boyfriend. I would not have settled for a guy who didn’t appreciate me to the level that I truly deserved. But unfortunately the way he treated me just helped to confirm what I already knew to be true. I really was ugly. I really was worthless. I just counted myself lucky that anyone wanted me at all. That’s why I married him when I was only 20 years old, even though I wasn’t happy, even though in my heart I wanted more than he could or was even capable to providing. I did it because even though I knew this consciously, even though I was fully aware that I was settling, I also knew for a fact that this was the best I could do. Only pretty girls got guys who truly loved, and wanted them. Only girls whom were worthwhile got the kind of guys that took your breath away. Only those girls got the kind of love that made the world make sense. It shouldn’t come as a shock that I was divorced four years later. Funny thing about marriage. The biggest difference between marriage and dating is that when your dating you can easily work past or even outright ignore all those little cracks in your relationship. From the hairline fractures up to the fault lines. But when you get married those cracks don’t go away. In fact they grow and deepen. Until you drift apart like tectonic plates. After my divorce I finally began learning about myself. I began dating my second boyfriend. He was much, much older than me, but he was also the first man who made me feel wanted. He made me feel sexy. That relationship wasn’t perfect either. I could write a whole other, whatever this is, about why it is never a good idea to sleep with a married man behind his wife’s back, but I overlooked that as well because he gave me something I really needed at that time. He gave me confidence. He helped me realize that I was beautiful, I was sexy, and I was worthwhile. I stopped hiding the body that I had always found repulsive under dark drab clothes. I started wearing clothes that made me look as sexy as I felt. I started flirting which I had never done before. It was a magical time in my life. When that relationship finally came to its inevitable end, I took my new found confidence and threw it at a guy that was attractive beyond my wildest dreams. He was the kind of guy that the high school version of me had fantasized about dating. Tall, dark, and brooding (sorry I can’t even type that without laughing g but we are getting to that) and even though my intuition warned me against getting serious with him, warned me that like a low voltage electrocution not only would it kill me it would hurt the entire time I was dying, I got serious. I felt like I needed to date someone like him to prove to myself that I could, prove that I was beautiful and sexy enough to date someone as hot as him. Even though I finally had confidence and self worth I still felt like I was dating way above my station even though in reality I had reached the bottom of the barrel and was now digging in the ground beneath. The first time he cheated on me was literally two weeks into our relationship. But I didn’t leave. He continued to lie and cheat for the entirety of our relationship and I never left. I had finally realized how beautiful sexy and worthwhile I was just to end up dating every bully I had ever endured all rolled into up into one handsome incarnation of everything evil. He methodically and quite effectively reminded me that I was ugly. That I was clingy. And just like before I accepted it all as fact. I knew I was ugly, and that if I wasn’t so ugly he wouldn’t have to cheat on me. And if I wasn’t so clingy he wouldn’t he to be so distant and unavailable. And that I could never leave him because I was so ugly and worthless that I would never ever be able to convince someone else to love me. And I believed all of it. It wasn’t just a belief for me it was a fact list like they had been facts in highs school. So I never left. Even after he cheated on me for the ten millionth time. Even after he gave me an STI and blamed it on me, even when I began to financially support him, a guy who made over twice as much money as I did so he could blow his paychecks on drugs video games and I’m sure sex with other girls. He finally left me when I had nothing else to offer that he needed. And in the theme of our relationship he made me feel responsible for that as well. He had tried so hard to love me, But I was just too hard to love. he needed to love himself enough to find something better, and I needed to die alone. And I accepted that he was right. I accepted that I really was this awful ugly worthless person that he and every person at school had convinced me I was. I had finally overcome the pain of my bullying, but this saint of a man had held a mirror up and shown me that they had been right all along. That’s why when I saw a guy who made my heart flutter the very moment I laid eyes on him, I didn’t introduce myself, I didn’t flirt. I knew I was ugly, worthless and impossible to love so I just admired him from across the room, fantasizing about what it would be like to talk to him, to kiss him, to be with him. Even after a friend (who didn’t know about my weird little crush) introduced him to me I still lacked the confidence to actually make a move. But I did talk to him. We talked for hours. Sharing and laughing. I found it easier to talk to this guy than I had ever felt talking to anyone before in my entire life. I didn’t hold back, I didn’t need to with him. He saw me. Making a move on him was literally the hardest and most terrifying moves I’ve ever made. I liked him, I was attracted to him both physically mentally and emotionally. I needed to know if he was attracted to me, but the terror of rejection, the terror of all of those terrible things about me being once again confirmed by a possible rejection filled me with dread that I cannot describe. But I did it. I made a move. It was 6 in the morning. Him and I had literally stayed awake together all night talking. And I was having so much fun talking to him that I didn’t even feel tired, even as the sun began to rise. After hours of plotting my move in my head I decided my move would be to lay down on the ground beside him and lay my head on his leg. Silly I know. But I felt like if he was attracted to me the way I was attracted to him he would allow my head to stay and if he didn’t share me feelings He would ask me to sit up or something else subtle that would be less soul crushing than a full blown rejection. Then we could just keep talking and I could pretend my move had never happened. So I did it. I laid my head on his leg, and to my surprise and delight he allowed it to stay. He didn’t say a word about it in fact, just started running his fingers through my hair as we continued to talk. We shared our first kiss that morning. I’ve been with him for over two years now. And I’m happier than I ever thought I could be. All those years of self loathing have become a distant memory. Because of him, I not only feel beautiful, sexy and wanted, but I feel an actual detachment from the memories of when I didn’t. As if they happened to someone else. Those feelings are no longer a part of who I am. I’m not saying my confidence is flawless. I’m still scared, more scared in fact than I ever want him to know that I will one day be replaced. That he will someday find someone better than me, that it wouldn’t even be that hard for him to find someone better than me, and he will abandon me like everyone who came before him. I tell him I feel this way sometimes, and he holds me and reassures me that I am beautiful and perfect and that he could never want anyone else. And I believe him. For the first time someone saw me. He saw everything that I was, everything that I had been or may yet become. He saw all of the things that are wonderful about me, and also the things that are not so wonderful. and he loves every bit bit of it. But the thing I love most is the gift me gave me. A gift I will happily spend the rest of my life thanking him for. He saw me, and when he saw me, he saw me so clearly, and so completely, that I couldn’t help but see myself. I saw myself reflected in his eyes, and finally after years and trying and failing, I was able to reconcile the me in my head to the me I saw in his eyes. I was able to see the me my family and friends had spent so many years trying and failing to convince me was there all along. I see myself, she’s a beautiful baddass, and I love the fuck out of her.

If you are reading this and can relate to this in any way at all, I want you to know…no….i need you to know that you are not ugly you are beautiful, you re not worthless. You are perfect. You are not weak, you are powerful. And someone will love you. Someone will one day look at you and wonder how they got so damn lucky. And if you end your life now you will never understand how wonderful that feels. I love you, and I pray you learn to love yourself.

[battrishcrazy]

Jinnkies, SCOOBYNATURAL!!! - for this blog you definitely want to go to my actual webpage blog. There are lots of pictures and I put alot of time into formatting it!

http://www.justtrishsmith.com/lilbatblog/march-31st-2018

The intro is about me and my love for Scooby, Superntural, Buffy, and just so you get to know me better then the bottom is spoiler filled, and is my commentary on the Scoobynatural episode!!! leave comments!!

........................

Guys!!!!! This is seriously the best thing ever created!! We'll maybe that's an exaggeration but I mean its pretty accurate. Its kinda rare I get excited about anything, and typically when I do I some how get let down because my exceptions are too high. BUT 100% just WOWing at Scoobynatural!!         Supernatrual is longstanding my favorite TV show (yes, I like it more then BUFFY.) Well I do now, I was overly obsessed with Buffy in High School. It is kind of embarrassing but also not really, I stand by my obsession! I made a lot of my friends because of it in college I even called our friend group the Scooby-Gang; as from Buffy... As a kid who didn't love Scooby-Doo, but I mean obviously I did. Been spooky since  I was born pretty much haha! My room still has some of my my Scooby items. I typically; blankets, posters, even one of those plastic three drawer things with wheels- its pretty fancy too and the creepy eyes glow in the dark). And how awesome did I think it was it that Sarah Michelle Gellar (BUFFY) played Daphne in Scooby-Doo live action?! I would get so excited for all the actors in Buffy to be in anything else but for it to combine some of my favorite things,  HELL YEAH! ((Matthew Lillard as shaggy was great, love that dude. SLC PUNK & SLC PUNK 2 are some more of my favorite things. If you havent watched SLC PUNK 2, go do so. Its pretty funny, probably my most watched movie on Netflix. I am Trish (from the movie), she is the future me. A kick ass punk/goth woman, with pink hair a floppy hat, and owns a oddity shop!!)) ... Because of my excitement and anticipation for months waiting the episode I wanted to share it with someone, even if they didn't love Supernatural too. A big thing on my mind lately is sharing experiences and excitement in things (hobbies, shows, etc) with someone you love. EVEN IF its not something you or they necessarily like. BUT for the reason of watching the one you love be excited and see how happy they are when they share with you. (This is actually one of my blog topics, because it keeps coming up or being on my mind, when I want to share but people are so accepting. I do my best especially for those I love to try to like or at least enjoy that they like something) but again I'll write that later. ( THIS IS JUST HOW MY BRAIN WORKS AND IT JUMPS ALL OVER BEFORE I EVEN GET TO MY SUBJECT) Because I was home I got to watch it with my MOM! Which was probably the best choice because she loves Scooby-Doo too, shes the one who let me watch it and like it. But also because she doesn't judge me on my love for Supernatural and weird things. Even though she may not understand it sometimes or like it she never judges me and just things I'm silly. Sometimes shes in the room when I watch Superntural or any of my shows and I kinda fill her in and then get to laugh out loud because someone else is in the room. I actully dont watch my shows around many people. I am a talker in movies BUT don't talk during my show, unless its little comments. I mean thats all I do in movies too, at least the first time watching is just my commentary (which sometimes is pretty funny or insightful and I should record it). But yeah I don't share my show time with many people and there are few I want to share it with. Because that is my nerdiest self when watching my shows for the first time!!! So, yeah, watching with Mom was a good idea, and I'm super happy I got to be home for the day and that she let me watch it and stayed up till like 1 am watching it with me). ... oh I suppose I should add in for those of you who don't know me well. I went to school for animation, film, and design. So some animations are super exciting and impressive to me, others stress me out, and then some I'm like WTF are you doing I know people who could do this way better. I also don't do anything with animation. Sadly, I hate drawing and don't like my hand drawn artwork. Its stressful and I don't have the patients for it. Although in college I took the classes because I wanted to learn visual effects not so much the animation. BUT I was the first to graduate from Point Park's animation program. At the time the program was brand new and mostly animation not visual effects. If I could go back part time and take a few classes, I would really love that.. maybe some day but 6 years of college already cost enough. I really want to take the class where they make music videos too but also I just wish to do visual effects and music videos. Which most everyone knows and I just need to get a gig and do it and learn from those around me I already have the foundations and many skills.. the point is some of the things I thought were the funniest were just because of animation jokes and such!! ... This isn't a review and definitely has spoilers. Its just what some of my thoughts and commentary was. To review or write out everything I'd have to watch again and write down my thoughts because I don't always remember them all. When I'm enjoying something and in the moment, not focused on anything else, I don't remember every detail just how much I liked it or disliked it and just my feelings mostly..        I just have to say the writers and creators of Supernatural and genius and always come up with such awesome ideas. I love the show because of the variety of monsters and not just the same basic thing over and over. Also they stick so close to legions and lore (from the knowledge of I have of these things). I'm so picky on supernatural shows of movies because I like tradition so I like the creativity combined to tradition. ... not writing in paragraphs just ideas as they came ... "MOM, dean just gets attached to objects okay" ...                  How they ended up in Scooby world was a mystery to me until watching. I knew the episode was coming and wondered how they would end up there   but did'nt even really make any guesses. Sooooo (again spoilers here) they get sucked in with a beautiful purple electric portal type thing! I was like well I should have seen them getting sucked into the TV thing coming but I didn't, so surprised right off. Really my only thought was a cursed lunch box or a spell?.. Also purple electric is awesome, as I obviously always choose purple or green for anything I'm doing! ... the cartoon, exaggerated face slap!     Pretty much my excitement matches Deans but even more so because I get to see his excitement (kinda like I was saying about enjoying loved ones reactions) ... "except Fred hes a Wad..." "Cas is kind of like our talking dog.."(cracked up and explained to mom that Cas is their angel.. in case she forgot) ... at one point realized that non of the characters have white in their eyes and drove me nuts for a few scenes ... Agreed Fred is kind of a dick.. Don't be mean to Dean, Dude. ...    Oh the nostalgia of the castle with the bats!!! My heart! My love for bats probably started here. I CANT EVEN! ... Sam, dude, stop being a grump and enjoy the day and your brothers happiness. You're being a bummer and I want to punch you. I love you too but dude! ... Deans night gown.. Even mom laughed at that part!! ... Jinkies, Jeepers, RutRo, SON OF A BITCH!! all the Scooby gang remained pretty chill for seeing an actual dead guy! but the wondering of everything in this is just so perfect! how Sam points out its an actual dead dude to everyone saying their typical catch phrase!! just everything about this is so well planned, referenced, brilliant! ...                     Fred is a dick again... Daphne doesn't agree "not really" ha! ... someone is outside the window. everyone thinks its a bad guy.. I just yell CAS!!! then it ends up being Cas. His entrance as per usual is comedic... also I did not guess it was Cas following them eariler. I didn't make any guesses on that, again. (which is odd, I usually make all the predictions and drive everyone nuts, but I just was so focused!) ... "So, do they always just walk away from dead bodies" SECOND BODY- as soon as they show it I go "that's bit brutal..." and mom giggled. I'm assuming because of how fast I said it or because usually I complain about there not being enough blood. But HEY, I'm on the same page as Dean still and I'm in Scooby land and like WOAH.. also the Scooby Gang still not shocked at the blood, I guess they really think its fake or they just like.. IDK. ... Damn Velma you being a bit much of a bitch towards Sam. Like yeah your awkward and you think hes cute, but mean is not the way to go. (he's sensitive) ... I'd totally pick Shaggy and Scoobies split up time, not because I'm a chicken but just because who doesn't want to get to spend their time with those two, and go find some snacks! ...  THE SCOOBY CHASE SCENE!!!! OMG.. more nostalgia! probably my favorite part of the episode.. maybe.. might have saw even Scrappy Doo running around!          oh no! Shaggy falls and gets hurt!! Dang Shaggy, I've never seen you get so mad. He just knows he's typically invincible and just like doesn't think a think but he gets just a bit violent there with his reaction. My thought oh Cas is there hell, heal him..... BUT UMMMM he doesn't... I bring this up about 10 more times over the next few scenes. Just like why, they obviously know things are going on, or hey do it in secret. Don't let poor Shaggy suffer! ... again, oh no!! The Scooby Gangs hearts are broken, they don't know how to react to finding out that the supernatural exist.. freaking out!!!!! but Dean to the rescue, jumps in with a pep talk and gets their butts into gear for the battle!! (then the Scooby Gang gets a bit intensely into fighting monsters. They are a passionate bunch!!) ...                                              Dean lets Fred come up with a plan.... which fails.. But I'll let you watch that without describing it! not too many comments that I made during the scene! JUST BUBBLES! ... go to plan B... HOLD UP WAIT... Good plan BUT like when you pull the book to the secret passage. ummmmm, how does the Ghost fall.. what?! I Just yelled out HES A GHOST!!!! but I mean okay, a minor critique. and were in cartoon world, so it's all good! the salt circle does make sense, and it is pretty when the ghost tries to escape and more purple shocks.... ... LOVE love love, green and purple combo (mostly is used in spooky or Halloween themed things) but also just my theme. website, just realized thats the color of my nails right now, have a bunch of tattoos that color.. also planning on getting the Superntural tattoo but in a new school way not tribal and in green and purples... talking about it this week actually. decided on that recently but before this episode but only makes me want to get it sooner ...     Then they punch you in the heart!!!!!!!!!!! Because the bad guy is actually...... ... A KID!! an adorable little sweet kid being manipulated by a bad man! so so so sad!!! OMG! ... they then decide they need to cover up the realness from the Scooby Gang before they leave back to their world to set the kid free and then FINALLY CAS HEALS SHAGGY... in secret... SO LIKE WHAT TOOK SO LONG?!!! Come on Cas! ... THE END. well a few more scenes but nothing I have comments on!!! -- SO GO WATCH SCOOBYNATURAL NOW.        Also will there be an episode where they go back or where they Scooby gang comes to the supernatural world and live action…. (if so better be Sarah, Freddy, Matthew, Linda.... oh and Seth Green too because who doesn't want more Seth Green on their TV!) ... Let me know if you like it, let me know if you hate it (I hope you don’t) Let me know if you want it to be more like other peoples reviews or if you like how I did this one.... I've never wrote a review on anything, and I don't really read them, or watch them. BUT I don't watch or read much because I want to create my own content and make my own style so it doesn't have too much influence by anyone else. But also I really want to support others, do research and become better! ... DO YOU HAVE A BLOG? DO YOU DO REVIEWS? WHAT DO YOU DO? COMMENT YOUR LINKS AND ALSO SUGGESTIONS TO OTHER PEOPLE DOING SIMILAR THINGS FOR ME TO CHECK OUT. OR EVEN SOMETHING TOTALLY DIFFERENT IF YOU THINK ILL LIKE IT ... THANKS! PLZ VISIT MY WEBSITE! THE BLOGS LOOK WAY BETTER OVER THERE!!

[blackphantomfan995-blog-blog]

Hey! You there? I am. Wondering about life? Yeah i know you are. Dont ask me how i know. Shit what to write? Every second, every minute a thousand of images and words goes thrue my head, my mind is a messed up place. It never shuts down! I always think about something, im always caunting something and it doesnt sound so bad. Right? That’s what you thought. It’s killing me thruth to be told. I written a lot of messed up stuff but never one of my stories. Why do people write books about themself? Maybe if they had a happy life it would make everything okay, or a sad life just to get attention? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe they just wanted to be heard in the world and they wanted there story to be told. They just wanted someone to listen to them. Or maybe im just full of shit. Hah.. maybe? Think about that, unseartinty of the world. Think hard! Nothing 100% true today. That’s all we have a bunch of maybe’s and a bunch of lies that everyone is feeding us. If you are easily triggered that know dont read this because head up : Shit’s gonna get dark! What to say, what to say? My legs are shaking. I dont know why. Maybe I am nervous, huh.. maybe again. I’m not a pearson that ussualy opens up or actually tells you his feelings. Truth is i would rather suffer to see someone else happy. I know, i know.. It’s wrong and yes i do know todays big loud sentence in the world is i wanna die. Well thanks for ruining that. Take a moment to realize your joke and than say it again and again. Funny? No? Do it again! Say it ten more times! Funny? Maybe? Again, again and again! What’s wrong my silent friend? I cant hear a laugh anymore. You still want to make that joke? Go ahead say it, scream it, shout it from the bottom of your laungs until you run out of breathe and than fucking answer me: Still fucking funny? If you mean what you say than I’m with you. I understand! I wanted, I dreamed about it and I prayed for it and yet here I am still thinking not doing. It’s a scary thought aint it? Did you think about that my friend? What happends after you do it? Do you go to heawen to live out you favorite moment of life over and over again not being able to realize that you’re dead? Do you go to hell where demons rape you and satan tortures you over and over and over again? Do you simply stay on the other side as ghost forever? Do you get reborn in the new body not being able to remember your past life, or does it simply go black? Questions.. so many of them. I think about a lot of stuff and not being able to do anything because i overthink is my biggest weakness. We’ll get to everything dont worrie. I will let you in on my complicated mind but first lets exploy this. Heawen? Hmm.. it sounds kind off nice too bad I’m not. If it is real than i wouldnt go but i guess you know me better or you will so its for you decide. My happiest memorie? Shit.. i cant. I took a minute away from keyboard to change a song and took a moment to realize what my favorite moment is. and truth to be told i cant remember. Do i not have one? No i have one! Why cant i remember? Thousand of things are going thrue my mind and there it is the most beautiful and peacefull moment i lived is when i was next to an amazing girl. We didnt have sex, we werent drunk, we didnt have a good time with jokes or by watching anything. She was simply sleeping. Her head was on my cheast as i stroked her hair. Her heart beat i could feel as it almost matched mine. Her soft and gentl breath could be heard in the dead silence of the room. The window in the corner of the room had stripes on it so moonlight entered my room in lines when rest was just dark. Her soft body was next to mine. So warm and soft. That is the moment i knew that it doesnt get better than that. It complete nirvana. I knew nothing mathered and for the first time in my life my brain didnt work. I was at peace. I didnt worrie about now, or tomorrow in that moment. Nothing and everything mattered and it was beautiful.  Huh.. sorry for a moment there i got emotional. Just kidding it’s gonna get way, way deeper than that. It’s just hard to think about that. I want to feel that again. I want my fucking brain to stop working for atleast one minute so I can relax. No real names will be spoken in this book for there sake and i got way than enough people that hate me alread. So where did we left off? Oh that’s right death.  Hell? That one has many stories but lets talk about the most common one what would happen. You wake up in hell and you’re alone. You would think there’s fire but no. There’s nothing. Everything black and than it begins the torture the pain. Think of all your pain and combine it with milion. You would bleed and every part of you would be ripped apart. The pain would be endless and you would die over and over and over again and just kept coming back with no scars with nothing and it would go all over again. Huh.. that one sounds like a bitch, right? I wouldnt want that would you my friend? Stupid question afcorse you wouldnt there is no scenario in the world where anyone would want or think about that. Haha jokes on me i did. I’m sitting in the dark with my hoodie on combined with music not even normal music some wierd shit and writing about it. There’s a guy next to me playing a game. What would he think of me if he reads this? Would he see me as broken or damaged or simply would he share pitty? What do you think my friend? Please dont hate me! I just want to be honest with you much as i can and let you know me. Dont be scared. He left! The guy that was sitting next to me so now i can tottaly commit to you and we will have complete privacy. Staying on other side is a hard thing. Maybe worse than hell itself. Imagine the pearson you love the most in the world. Did you? Good. Now imagine being next to her without being able to touch her, without being able to touch anything. You can scream all you want but nobody would hear you. Would you like it that way? Let’s get deeper in to this. Imagine you’re tied to the one you love as a ghost. Does it sound bad? Yes! Imagine if you love a boy or a girl. She/He is your everything. You will see them in pain after your loss if you’re lucky enough for them to be in pain for you. It will destroy you watching that pearson suffer. What would happen after that? That pearson will get over you sooner or later while you are still tied to him/her and you will be forced to watch that pearson fall in love with someone else. Someone else will take your place, someone else will love them and fuck them when you will be forgoten. What would you do then my friend? Kill yourself? You cant, you’re already dead. You’ll cry, you’ll be in pain, you’ll be trully alone and in the end you would lose your mind over and over and over again.  It just fucked my head. What would you do in that place? The best scenario i can think of is that the girl i love would be alone but i wouldnt be happy even than. I couldn watch her be alone and sad like me. If she does have and you do wait for her on the other side you can probobly realise that she would wait for her last love and i would be forgoten. It doesnt work good in any scenerio. I would get old and i will be alone. Much as i love being alone, all by myself. It would be bad. Fuck.. i need to stop thinking. I lighted a ciggarete just to calm my nervs even if it doesnt so many people say it does because they bealive it’s that easy but im not weak minded. My mind doesnt stop. Do you smoke? Join me for a smoke.  There is alternative that you wouldnt remember anything or that you wouldnt remember anything. You would be reborn in a new life and be someone else. They are cases when people say they remember there past life. Moles and birth marks you have are a scar that’s been past down to your new bodie as a mark of how you died in past life. Do you bealive that? I think it’s interesting but people remembering there past life i think that is just pack of shit. I could say its 100% true or false cause’ we cant possibly know.  Well what do you think now? The death doesnt sound fun. It’s a thing to be scared of! I want it and im guessing a lot of other people but that is what life is. Life.. Fuck life! It is perfectly designed mistake made just for amusment for higher power to laugh at us. Did you ever heard a saying if you wanna make god laugh just tell him your plans. Hah.. it kind of makes sence. I read a joke the other day it was funny for me.So here it is : A guy is sitting in the office in a interview for a job. There’s two more of them. A woman and a man. They all wearing suit’s so it look’s serious. So a woman asks: Do you have any special talents? He reaplyes: I cant die! A man and a woman excanged lookes and asked: How cant you die? He said: Because dreams dont come true!  Hahaha cracks me up every time. How about you friend? Did you laugh? I hope you did. The jokes. They are all i have! I have nothing. It’s lonely from where i sit. You wouldnt bealive me how lonely it is. I thought of getting a dog. It’s not something special but its something. Made me miss Rocky. I know its a shitty name i didnt choose it. The only animal i loved. I should explain. When i was 4 or 5 i cant really remember the year but i had a dog. He wasnt a special breed or somehow special in any way but he was to me. Groving up i didnt have friends. Not because they didnt want to hang with me it’s because i didnt want to hang out with them. It’s okay you’re safe with me. If you are reading this than you are probably wierd as me and it’s okay. It’s okay to be wierd! My sister didnt want ever to play with me neither my parents. They were to busy fighting. My grandma well just sat there and ignored the hole situation. Many times i would hide and of all fighting i would just abserve her how could she remain so calm. I kind of felt it all even back than. I didnt realise what was going on but fuck there was scenes i cant forget. What is your first memory my friend? Your dad teaching you how to ride a bike? You mom teaching you how to cock, some family member loving you in any way? Mine was my dad holding my moms neck as she scratched him took a knife and chased him thrue the house. She ran right past me and didnt care. I ran out of the house and went to the backyard and climbed my favorite tree. I cryed normaly since i was just a kid. I remember saying to myself “mom and dad dont love me” I cryed so much i began to shake and i fell from tree. It wasnt high but for a kid it was. It was atleast four feet high and i fell. I lost concesnes for two hours i think. I think that was what trigerred my sleep paralysis. Because i just lied there and kept thinking to myself my parents will show up, they will show up. I began talking to myself just to calm myself down. I know it’s insane to talk to yourself and yet i do it. It’s the only thing that keeps me sain witch isnt working that much for a long time my friend. Since that day i suffered from sleep paralysis until july this year when it just stoped but more on that later. I waited until i could move i stud up dusted myself off and went in to my house. I climbed the stairs and saw my mom, dad, grandma and sister drinking coffee like everything is okay. Like nothing happend. I froze. I stud there and i looked at them as the did at me. My mom said where have i been and why is my knee bleeding. I lovered my head and saw my knee and simply walked away. I was hoping for attention so i walked slow as i heard my sister say what a retard and my parents laughing at that. So yeah my friend i wasnt a friendly pearson neither i wanted friends. Same goes until this day. My only friend was my dog. I played with him and he never brought the ball i threw him neither did he obey me. He didnt hafty. I was a kid. I would simply sit on the ground and pet him. It was beautifull. I even builded him a wooden house. He had one but it was old so i decided to fix it up. I didnt know how to use nails, hammer or any tool for that matter but i gave it a try. I spent few hours on that rotten, little house. The only break i took was to go in the house and eat. It was almost night and i nedeed to go inside the house. So i finished it finnaly placed in the corner in the back-yard and admired what i’ve done. Rocky went inside and liyed on the floor. My heart was filled with joy and i run inside to show my parents. They didnt care, they said if anything i made it worse. Looking back it wasnt good i admit it. I didnt fix it. But that wasnt a thing to say to a kid. My joy went away in a second as i got ready for the bed. The next day i would wake up early in the morning when everyone was sleeping to help my grandma with launch and shoping. I loved to help around the house. She sent me to the store so i went. Rocky never left the yard. I went and saw him from distance. It was a huge dog you cannot miss him. As i ran twords him he ran twords me and then it happend. A car ran over him. I could have screamd or cryed but i didnt. It was shock without me knowing even what shock is. I continued walking to the store looking back at him and i began to be scared. I didnt even go near him as i returned home. I walked in my house, placed  groceries on the table and told my grandma: “The car ran over ..” and than i broke i started crying. My grandma buried him and i was sad for days. I would sit alone in back-yard thrue entire day not doing anything or saying anything. It was quiet mostly but i did talk to myself a bit. That is the first time my parents were trully worried about me and tryed to talk to me. They even forced my sister to play with me but nothing changed until few days later a neiborhood dog chased thrue the street on my way to the store and bit me by hand as i fell. Somehow i forgot for a time there. I forgot about Rocky and my life went going. When i watched frankeweene for the first time I cryed so much. I think that is the first time i remembered him. I didnt leave my room or play with someone else until i was seven. Life’s weird. I know! Fuck.. I cant, i want to but i’m trying to share much as i can. It’s hard. Do you know? Are you deranged like me my friend? Shit.. lets keep going. In those two years nothing special happened. My parents got divorced i cryed, my sister kissed my moms ass and they spent all of there time together and my grandma got sick. I kind of felt it all and started growing up in another direction. I didnt like to talk to people, i didnt like to be touched by anyone, i liked my stuff organized and i would go crazy if any of my top three rules broke. My mom forced me when i was seven out of the house to make friends. I went outside and i was afraid. I didnt know anyone. On the way thrue the street i looked myself in the car and saw my reflection. Looking back i was a nobody between those kids and i regret going out to this day. I was just some lame kid with his favorite spider t-shirt and half long black hair that i kept pushed back. You dont fit in anywhere neither do I. People are feed with the bullshit and they keep saying look at me im awkward, look at me i wanna die. But are you? Are you trully crazy like me? What’s wrong with society people ask. You did it! Not you friend maybe, maybe you did I wouldnt know but what i do know is that the world is sick. There is so much filth in this world. People steal. Everybody steals. You cant say you dont cause sort of you do. In every position someone is getting more or less. Someone is stealing and someone is loosing. It’s a selfish circle. Look at what happend to the world! What do you see my friend when you walk, what do you see outside? Do you see beauty or reality? I see the world for what it is and most of people dont know me i and judge me crazy just for that. I know the world has gone to shit. Today’s corparate media (facebook, youtube, twitter, instagram, snapchat, viber, what’s up, my space, messenger, google, yahoo, apple and many more) They are sickness in the world. They’re not the only one! Do you know who Steve Jobs is? I do! Steve Jobs is a man that got ritch from child support. Underage kids worked there ass off for him to get ritch. What do you think he runned? Apple! Iphones today you’re using its all him, Think next time you take your iphone that some kid was forced to work and make it. You dont care? Ohh i know you do but not enough to speak out and throw it away. Am i right? You wouldn’t cause’ fuck kids right? I am discasted by this world. Look at hollywood. Everybody knows and loves hollywood and yet it infested with child pornagrafy and sexuall abuse. Many actors came out and said that they were abused. Many writers and directors were the one who abused kids and yet they went to prison for a little bit. Not even all of them just some of them and than they returned to hollywood. Knowing that a guy raped a tweelwe year old girl went to jail, came out and is now directing a movie who main theme is that a girl is raped when she’s tweelwe. It just fuck’s my head. I know i shouldn’t care. But i do. I care! I can go on for days on what is wrong with society but truth is you already know that. Long as you have money you dont give a shit. Nobody does. Todays biggest problams are attention, dating, social media, money.. There’s no love or respect. There’s no hope anymore. The human species might as well soon be priced out of exsistence since the world is fucked. People dont care about anything but themselfes. Sometimes i try it. I really tryed but i cant that’s not who i am. Soon nothing will matter cause we’ll all be too dead to care. So you ask me what is wrong with society? Fuck society! I thought of getting a shrink many times. But comeone let’s be realistic. He doesn’t know what goes around in my head. Nobody does! I can write to you my friend all day long and yet you couldnt help. Truth is by the end of this you’ll see me as a broken man and you’ll keep your distance like everybody else. That’s the main reason i push so many people away. I can put a fake smiley that nobody never knew it was fake. When i was dying and screaming inside nobody knew i never let them. That scares me to be honest. I’m sorry but i am. We are friends right? Hah… i sound like an emo to you dont I? People living in the ignorence of the world having everything and saying they know what pain is are retards. I’m not discureging disabled people but I’m stating the fact that that thought for you to have it you need to be a retard. My skin is bothering me right now. I hate it. I hate everything. What do you say to this my friend? What do you say to someone like me? Have you ever been lonely? I have. The feeling doesnt go away. I mean it does but that pain, that feeling sticks with you. It is something you cant forget like smoking a first joint, poping a first pill or getting drunk the first time.  Shit. im over doing it aint i? Can you see me? Can you hear me? The lonelyness goes oway but it always comes back. For a moment you get a fix of your drug, an escape from reality and it comes right back. It hits you like a bullet. You dont know what happened but you feel it. Every time its more painfull. It gets deeper every time and it digs and digs it’s way to you brain until you get so stressed out you cant speak or breathe. You type words like i do without taking a breathe. It’s hopeless. You cant stop it. Your entire body starts cramping up and you start to shake. There’s a whole world around you and yet you’re in the corner. It’s dark. Nobody’s around even though they are it’s like they’re gone. Nobody’s around you’re all alone. You slowely take a deep breathe, realize you’re a goner and it the ice cold wind hits you as you start to shake and feel it in your bones. The pain is real. You blame everybody around, everyone you know, you blame your mother for giving birth to you, you curse god for creating pain or let along creating you, you go thrue every possible option but in the end you only have yourself to blame. You blame yourself. You ask yourself as tears fall while your entire body is shaking: What have i done wrong? Why did i deserve this? You want the feeling to go away and your mind is clowded so you first resort is cut it out. You take a razor put it on your hand. It’s on your arm. Pressed sharp on it waiting to cut you open but your mind is somewhere else. You want it and you dont. You figure why the hell not? Is there anybody who cares? There’s a thousand of things going thrue your head. Reasons why you shouldnt do it and reasons why you should. Everything and nothing is there or isnt as it opens your vein slowely. It hurts so you make a small sound as a razor cuts you open. You look at it and the blood slowely starts to apear and drip from your arm. You do it again, and again, and again and you just watch it. Watch blood drip oway. Watch life fade oway. Something wrong my friend? I know it’s bad. Everybody knows! But there is something so peacfull about it. The pain gets put out. The feeling of lonelyness goes oway. It’s like taking a strong drug and recovering from it. It’s like your system is adjusting to normal again as you watch it bleed. Tears have stoped and you hear a voice. You look around and realize this is in you head. Shit. This was all in my head. What the hell is happening to me? It takes few of these until you trully do it. It’s just a matter of time before anybody snap’s and my was when i was eleven years old. I hope havent lost you my friend. I kind of feel better talking about this to you. Actually no i dont. Anxiety is killing me right now. There is to many people around me it makes me wanna stand up scream shut the fuck up. Lucky me to have you to talk to so i can take my mind off things. Looking at it it’s wrong i know it is. Worse of all it’s like being addicted and i dont mean that you want to cut yourself but for pain to go away next time you need to cut more of yourself, you need to cut deeper, and deeper, and deeper until you’re a goner. So where did i stop? What story should i say to you? Please dont let me be gone.. please, please, please, please... I’m crying as i write this. Truth is i have so much pain and i just wanna die. There is the biggest truth about me. Fuck life, fuck family, fuck everything and everyone. Every one of you can suck it. Do you want the truth? You got it.. But that is not how life works. I live for pain. I want happines maybe, i wanna feel normal but im not. I know what is like to be different. I’m very different. I’ve been telling myself for a long time now, for at least 10 years now dont worrie about life. It can maybe fuck you hard and leave you deppresed but you’re not going to live long to care. Year after year getting thrue life drunk and high thinking im gonna do it. I swear im gonna do it. But here i am. Left alone to bleed out my tears and pain and it still has a hold on me. Oh god how i wish it was different. Did you ever fantisize about what would it be to have a normal life? What would it mean? I did! Somehow i know no matter what i do, or what would happen i would end up the same deppresed, broken high and lonely boy i am. Fuck.. shit’s getting blurry around me. Somehow i think this book shouldnt be read while you’re high. Shit’s insane and it can fuck you up. Take a pill. Join me. Slowely turn up Lil Peep and sink in your bed, light a ciggarete and join me in my hell. That reminds me of a winter when i was sixteen. I was alone. I was living alone as well. I had no money. I didnt eat for two days and outside was ice cold. I returned home from a dessprate attempt to steal some food but i didnt do it. I walked in to my old house where i lived. It had no eletricity or water. It was chilling cold. I was so alone. I had nobody. I liyed on my bed covered myself with what i had and froze for hours. To make a situation even worse i took some pills thinking fuck it would be good. I wont feel shit i’ll just fall asleep. But i didnt! I was awake for hours..thinking, and thinking, and thinking. What do i have to live for? I’ve hit rock bottom so many times that it doesnt suprise me anymore. I just wait for it knowing it’s coming. I mean that moment was something i cant put in the words. That is the first time i cryed for hours. I cutted my entire arm and didnt even feel it. It was the first time it didnt help no matter how deep i got. You know it’s bad when it’s to cold to even take your pant’s off so you cut your legs thrue them while crying/screaming.  When you read this dont think im telling you to do drugs. I dont! But for a fucked up life you need drugs. People who didnt try dont understand what it’s like. My life without drugs would be a complete wreck at least with drugs i had some good moment’s. It was fun at least sometimes. I remember my first joint. My ex friend and i smoked it in my yard. I tripped out i was a vampire haha.. can you bealive it? I was fourteen and i was way in too Vampire Diaries. I builded at least a hundred stakes and started making weapons like they did in Supernatural my favorite show by the way. So many good memories with people i want to die now but still those memories are something that is still a part of who i am. I didnt have anyone to tell me that’s good or bad. I didnt have anyone to teach me some things like shave or even to have a awkward converastion about sex. I wanted that. I know it’s stupid but im a sucker for all those things and i know it’s too late now anyways. What do you think? Dont call me a crybaby. Shit happend’s and people break. Soul is supouse to be the strongest part of oneself. I’m not you know selfish and shit. There are people who dont have shoes to put on there legs let along eat, there are starving children and im complaining on and on. It doesnt mean you’re depressed just because you dont have something, for that matter you can have a lot of things and be depressed. When I was thirteen my mom was at good financial state and i had basic shit and i was depressed. I’m not saying money doesnt mean anything. It does! Money is everything! I guess you can sink it in simply buy saying to everything “look at the bright side. You’re going to die and nothing’s going to matter anyways. Sorry friend. I went over board. This is about my memories i guess. It’s a shit storm same as it’s writter. What can i even say? Everyone was mean to me so imma going to die young. Yes! That’s gonna happen sooner than you think. When you think of family what is the first thing you think of? Love? Happines? Well in my case it’s different. When i try to remember i remember a scared boy. Scared of everything trying to hide from anyone. Home is a safe space for most. For me it was hell! Endless beating and torture. Did you ever feel so alone and realised that you completly alone? I have. I hate when i cant hold in my loneliness. I remember a night after a long time i wasnt depressed. I was maybe eleven and i was sitting on the window in my sister’s room. My sister was a messy pearson and nobody went in to her room because it’s filled with trash. I mostly went there so i can spend my time sitting on window listening to music, smoking and thinking about a girl. Her name was Sara. That is my favorite girl name. Hah.. it was in those moments friends. I stare at her house imagening that she will come out and that we will start some life together or atleast be together. You thought i was crazy? I did this for months. Each day i would repeat the story and add a new detail. Did you figure it out yet? It never got boring for me not even for a second. It was my way for a time coping with depression and to honest it made me happy. Story went perfect and it went like this. She was a blonde. I in my goth fase would be sitting on my window smoking while Garbage or The Cure would be playing in background. My black hoodie would be on me and she would notice me. It would be difficult not to. You could actually feel the spark between us the first time are eyes met. She had green ones. It gives me the chills just remembering it. She was moving in the house next to mine. The boxes and stuff were going in from all the trucks while the two of us would just look in each other eyes. It didnt have a meaning it was just that not some special love or meaning. But when i looked at her nothing mattered. It was complete peace and she took the big bootle of glue and glued together my heart and soul. Ahh it gives me the chills just to remember it. What did you think? No! It wasn’t sex it was just that. My undying love for Sara as she made me feel hole. That being said i can return to the part of me just sitting there on the window remaking the story in my head as my mother came in and pushed me off the second floor. To this day i have back problems because of it.  My mom was a spoiled kid and she always expect perfection and that everyone brings everything to her feet and treat her like a queen. I wasnt the best son. I wasnt even half way later but it was too late than for mothers attention when ruined me. Not alone afcorse there is a lot of people who fucked with me and made my life living hell.