#The rural hick life is real

[door-insurance]

So I played Life is Strange 2 for the first time ever

I didn’t wanna play it for a long time not cause it didn’t have Chloe or max (tbh I got sick of their asses around BtS they’re not even my faves)

By that point I was in college and had lost interest in the whole franchise but also I was very apprehensive of white creatives writing racism with no input from the group they’re portraying, they don’t usually do a good job

Sometimes they make it cartoony, sometimes they trivialize it, sometimes they romanticize it

So years later adulthood kicked my ass and I came back crawling to this franchise for some comfort, I finished True colors annnnd I finally started 2 after hesitating annnnd

^sketched this while playing

SPOILERS

I actually liked it

I liked Sean, the drawing segment he does- he was such a likable main guy, deserved better honestly.

I also liked Daniel, he was very adorable and I never got it when people called him annoying like no shit the 9 year old is gonna act like a 9 year old- just don’t be a jerk to him, I know he can be frustrating but that’s what taking care of a kid is like

And lis had always been about realistic complex characters, y’all can’t handle a traumatized nine year?

I have two younger siblings and two nieces plus I’ve been a bratty younger sibling to two older sisters

Maybe I’m just used to it?? But honestly Daniel wasn’t that bad

The racism portrayal in the first few episodes was not all that cartoony and it actually felt real at times, like I can check for American news rn and find stories similar to what you see in episodes 1-3 (minus the telekinesis)

Although the gas station racist hick spouting trump slogans was a bit on the nose, it’s more of dialogue thing

Some people thought the gas station detainment was egregious but it can happen unfortunately, especially to vulnerable people in rural areas and by someone of a higher systematic advantage

One other thing I did not like was the love interests, I thought Finn and Cassidy were alright characters on their own but why do we need romance in this game where the protagonists are always on the run?

I don’t like to compare lis 1 to 2 but when it comes to the romance the former did a better job as it spent more time establishing it, plus max stayed in the same place for the majority of the game- but you know what? Sean doesn’t have to be in a relationship right? It can be a one off thing, that’s fine

Which brings me to my next point

How old are Cassidy and Finn?

Cause Sean is still 16 and no, being on the road didn’t mentally age him- he’s not “mature” for his age

He is still a kid

So for some reason Dontnod never really specified their ages but some articles described them as teens (they look 30 to me) and they can be around 18 right? Their lives are hard stress ages you- it happens, we can with live that, it’s just a two years difference

But teens or not

why did they animate a whole knocking the boots scene???

Of all the games in the series, the only one that gets a sex scene is the one with the much younger protagonist and his ambiguously aged older looking love interest and I think it’s only with Cassidy you get to do it in the tent

Alex Chen was robbed of a on screen booty call from a beanie wearing lesbian with a sexy radio voice or a buff ass Adonis of a man who was Smokey the bear’s regional manager or something

Anyways I’m gonna move on I’m uncomfortable lmao

*im not hating on people who ship Sean with either Finn or Cassidy, I’m not even tagging your ship names- im just stating my personal preferences on my blog

One last thing I did not like about LiS 2 and it was the one thing that kept me from playing it for years

That one scene from episode 4

So at this point Sean Diaz went through the following:

-lost his father, had to abandoned his loved ones, education and home

-was accused of killing a cop

-had to take care of his little brother on his own while on the run, the same brother with telekinesis and none of them know how to control it

-was harassed, beaten then detained by a racist white man

-had to take refuge in an abandoned cabin with little resources

-the dog that they adopted at the gas station eventually gets mauled

-the one time they found solace at their grandparents house they had to leave abruptly cause the police was hot on their trail

-on their way out they can potentially witness the neighbors kid that they befriended get hit by the police car that’s chasing them

-they find shelter at a nomad campground but oh no they get involved with drug trafficking cause they barely have any other options to make money (unfortunately this happens a lot IRL this isnt egregious)

-Sean now has to deal with the trafficking, making sure that Daniel doesn’t get into any trouble with his powers while fake ass giancarlo esposito is breathing down his neck

-and guess what happens next… Daniel gets robbed into pulling a heist on temu gus fring and it goes badly, Sean can potentially lose a love interest/friend in Finn

-Sean gets hurt, Daniel goes so mad that he blows the whole place up; a shard glass flies into Sean’s eye and he ends up losing it

- Sean wakes up from a coma and learns that his brother is missing and he’s about to be taken to jail

- the one thing that consistently brought him joy during this trip was his art and because of the missing eye he can’t even do it the same anymore cause it hurts now

- Sean has to escape the hospital with a hot wired car, little money and has to drive across two states just to get to his brother

-on the way he dreams of his father, he wants him back he wants his old life back but that’s not gonna happen so he has to move forward

Im not listing all this as examples of bad story telling, a lot of these are real life experiences of homeless people. im just painting a picture of the shit that Sean had went through so far

Cause right after the dream sequence, Dontnod didn’t think all that was enough no you had to see Sean get hate crimed by two lifetime movie, sitcom special of the week racists- be made to either sing or suffer a brutal beating

It added nothing to the plot, it didn’t need a choice system either- it’s a hate crime, you’re not asking Joyce for fucking pancakes or eggs n bacon at the whales diner or hosing down Lisa the fckin plant.

This to me went straight to trauma p*rn category, it’s wheelchair Chloe all over again

I hated it then in LiS 1 and I hated now in LiS 2, this is why I don’t dick ride Dontnod that often

They always had this tendency right before the end they single out a particular character and mentally whip them, they become the writing teams punching bag- they think we didn’t get it the first time that this character is going through it, they just hammer it in with the subtlety of a heart attack and I hate it

“Yeah but it’s there to show Sean’s resolve to find Daniel-“

HE ESCAPED FROM THE HOSPITAL AND THE FEDS, HE HOT WIRED A CAR TO DRIVE ACROSS TWO STATES

He’s starving, dehydrated, suffering from chronic pain

That’s enough

Let the character breathe

You ask why not a lot of people wanna play this game and I’m gonna tell you, as much I enjoyed it myself it’s not an easy game to play- it gets brutal, especially right around the end

I’m not against bleakness or extreme conflict, I’m into that but sometimes that doesn’t translate well to any gaming format- especially a choices matter game that’s meant to be replayed

Some people have asinine reasons not to play LiS 2 like it dealing with racism and those people suck, lis had always dealt with progressive themes like calling out objectification, cyberbullying and sl*tshaming

Racism shouldn’t be the exemption

but misuse of racial trauma and not knowing when it’s appropriate to invoke it is a huge turn off and hella triggering to a lot of non white players and I remember when LiS 2 dropped I’ve seen (mostly white) lis fans at the time proclaiming that not wanting to play it meant that you were racist

Like I said there were probably racists who didn’t wanna touch the games cause of the main characters skin but there were people like me who were apprehensive of the “Let’s go to the mosh pit Shaka brah” people handling racism

This is the same studio that had Ms Grant (one of the few black characters from LiS 1) claim that the white settlers peacefully shared the stolen land with the native Americans

I find that shit harder to believe than the time traveling powers

And they were doing alright in the first episodes they covered stuff like unconscious biases slipping through, dog whistles, polite racism from the grandparents segment, police brutality, racial profiling and being targeted/othered- some of these things I went through when I visited western countries

Then they did the bullshit I feared theyd do…

I really don’t blame myself for being hyper vigilant at the time and honestly I was going through a lot then, even if I wanted to I wouldn’t have touched LiS 2 cause it’s a very heavy tasking game to play

I know I kinda made it seem like I didn’t like this game but I did, its the best one in terms of the choice system

It had more weight to it, seeing Daniel internalizing what you say to him or how you act around him was so cool

Also what the second game has over the first one aside from the choices system is the ending selection- I never liked picking the endings for max, I wanted her to pick the ending or her coding/script to do that

Its definitely more fleshed out technically even though LiS 1 has a special place in my heart it’s always gonna be no. 1- but im also glad that I got to experience the 2nd game for the first time, I liked it

Personal lis ranking

1: Lis 1

2: Lis 2

3: True colors

Discount bin: BtS

My personal fave moments from LiS 2:

- beating up the racist bully and giving him a concussion

-mushroom (rip icon)

- victorias letter

-winning that that bear from that claw machine

-gorillaz song that was not feel good inc

-Brody pointing at a fucked up looking arcadia bay yelling “that’s the past!”- that was hilarious

-Sean paying tribute to Arcadia bay in his sketchbook (this fucking kid man, he’s so sweet he deserves the world- what did he do to make DONTNOD mad at him)

- the wolf animation and the story that plays before every chapter

-this was the worst hate crime in the whole game

[mightyflamethrower]

White rural rage is the deadliest threat to democracy that democracy has ever been threatened by. Every day, rage-filled rural whiteys are lying in wait to destroy our way of life as we know it. Not good!

To help you recognize this terrifying new threat, here are 10 ghastly examples of white rural rage:

This man enjoying a good book instead of reading The New York Times

No telling how much misinformation is in that book he's reading.

This mother teaching her homeschooled boy how to do math

Imagine all the queer history this poor child is missing out on.

This AI-generated photo of two meth heads fighting at a Waffle House

For his own safety, our photographer could not go into a real Waffle House.

These public restrooms that are separated by male and female

Imagine how unsafe this must make Rachel Levine feel.

This barn, painted with a message of hate

You can practically feel the rage in this photo.

This loaf of sourdough

Utterly terrifying.

This guy who is a little upset that Texas roadhouse is out of sweet butter and rolls

Look at the unbridled white rage in his face. This man is dangerous.

This weird hick family that hasn't even transed their kids yet

This is wrong.

This bigot who hasn't watched a single movie featured in Amazon's Women's History Month category

We all know why. He hates women.

These dangerous Christian nationalists praying before eating

They're so white and dumb, they don't even know God isn't real.

This young athlete with no myocarditis

Look at the white rural rage in his eyes. He should've been vaccinated.

This horrible podium-stealing insurrectionist

Run for your life!

[charmwasjess]

I know this is a lot of real life when I should be posting various guttural noises associated with the character Count Dooku from Star Wars and his boyfriend, a Typo, but I wanted to post a few thoughts from NYC while I had them in my head.

Like many big, busy cities with a reputation for unfriendliness, I found everyone incredibly generous, patient, and friendly. My favorite experience was leaving my hotel, intending to walk a block to buy coffee for breakfast one morning, and somehow, "I'll just walk a little further" turned into me spending 9 hours walking from one end of that island to the other, uptown and downtown, from the piers in Chelsea and the West Village to Alphabet City and the East Village. I stopped in little bars and shops, looked around, read my book and talked to people.

Here's a random list of things I liked:

Met a guy on the High Line bridge smoking a joint with his tame pet pigeon, who he'd found hurt as a baby and raised by hand

I was standing in line for coffee and I felt someone touch my leg. I looked down and a dog I had not even noticed because he was being so silent and well behaved had given me the most gentle, polite nose-touch "hello." I said “hey” and we both went back to standing in line

Saw this dude doing the most incredible parallel parking job I have ever seen in my life and then he threw himself a little dance party in the front seat of his car in celebration. Charming!! Then it went on a little long with a lot of what appeared to be talking and yelling to himself, making faces. Oh, huh. That doesn't seem... Then he got out of the car and I realized he had a little tiny girl with him. That's who he was showing off to! I forgot about kids!!!

"so, where are you visiting from?" It's my accent. 😔 At least it wasn't as bad as when I was hanging at a bar in San Fran and said "y'all" in such an apparently stereotypically regional way that it prompted wild laughter and exclamations of "you ARE from the mountains!" from my new friends.

I had Korean BBQ for the first time and I know I'm a rural hick, but I'd just somehow lived in total misunderstanding of what that experience actually is?? Like, I thought it was some just especially tasty gochujang short ribs or something. And then?!?! The raw meat comes out?! And they light the table on fire?! 🤩All my favorite things!!!!!

[small-titty-alchemy]

Proposing the idea of Yankeecore:

Demonizing all southerners as racist hicks

"I don't care if it's the coldest weather you have ever experienced and your city doesn't have the infrastructure to handle it, ITS SO MUCH COLDER IN [STATE]"

Saying that red states deserve national disasters and poverty because the state voted red

Ignores voter suppression

Nashville Bachelorette party with cowboy hats

"I've never seen a cow in real life before!" (a real quote btw)

Doesn't know who Dolly Parton is

"If people can't afford a car, they should just take the train or the bus"

Doesn't know what a snake handling church is

Says Appalachia as "app-a-lay-sha"

Ignores black and indigenous culture in the south

Has never had soul food. Does not save bacon grease.

"That would NEVER happen where I'm from. No one is racist there like they are in the south."

Refers to rural areas as something other than the country

"I only went to church a couple times as a kid"

Makes fun of southern accents

Only knows 3 country songs and it's only the worst ones

Feel free to add on to this

[cantsayidont]

Early-morning hater hours:

MARMALADE (2023): Fizzy Keir O'Donnell crime comedy-drama about a wide-eyed young hick (Joe Keery) telling his new jail cellmate (Aldis Hodge) about how his romance with a pink-haired wild child called Marmalade (Camila Morrone) became a crime spree. Familiar but very charming for its first 70 minutes, with a bright, poppy visual style and a vivid evocation of the feeling of falling for someone who pushes you out of your comfort zone in ways both good and bad, the film then loses the plot with a twist obviously inspired by the 1995 crime drama THE USUAL SUSPECTS, leading to a resolution that isn't nearly clever enough to make up for the loss of the story's original emotional core. A real disappointment after its enjoyable opening.

MONSIEUR SPADE (2024): Peculiar AMC/Canal+ co-production, set in 1963 and starring Clive Owen as Dashiell Hammett's Sam Spade, now a retired but still cagey man of leisure living on the country estate of his late French wife (Chiara Mastroianni) in the rural town of Bozouls and acting in loco parentis for Teresa, the now-teenage daughter of Brigid O'Shaughnessey (Cara Bossom). Spade is drawn into a complex web of murder and conspiracy involving a mysterious young Algerian boy many people will kill to find, and who is somehow tied up with Teresa's errant father, Philippe Saint-Andre (Jonathan Zaccaï). Elliptical and very French, the show's sun-dappled atmosphere is pleasant, but the oblique way the story takes shape demands closer attention than it ever rewards, and the actual plot is both convoluted and unconvincing; at one point Spade aptly calls it "hokum." Furthermore, while the show is most enjoyable where it focuses on the hard-boiled American detective's uneasy integration into drowsy French rural life, it ultimately struggles to justify placing Spade so far outside his original milieu. It seems like creators Scott Frank and Tom Fontana wanted to create something approximating the Conan Doyle stories of a retired Sherlock Holmes keeping bees on the Sussex Downs, but Spade is really too thinly drawn a character for that, although Owen is better than one might expect. I also don't buy that Spade's exploits (at least vis-à-vis THE MALTESE FALCON) would make him world-famous like Poirot or Holmes.

[basedkikuenjoyer]

I learned Skip & Loafer was a thing last week, I’m already caught up. I don’t usually have the time for binges anymore. But damn it, it’s so sweet and earnest it gets a full on appreciation post. Some light spoiling ahead. Starts with MC Mitsu. Rural girl moves to the big city isn’t new, but she actually tracks for me as someone who’s had the experience. She’s not a hick; she’s only in Tokyo because Mitsu has way more potential than Ikajima can support. That’s real, even the way you sorta have the town’s hopes on you. You get that nice, fuzzy quote from the lovely best friend Fumi early about eating good food pass or fail. It captures the vibe so well. Such a nice, strong skeleton to build a leading lady off of. Not exactly new territory but it’s been out of style for a while. There is that real edge of acknowledging the growing issue of rural depopulation in Japan. That said, if we’re talking new ground there’s a clear standout...

Nao-chan. Sweet, sweet Nao. Here she is launching into dropping some great wisdom about fashion and how it only needs to have as much of a role in your life as you want it to. One of our big wrinkles is that Mitsu goes to stay in Tokyo with her aunt who is trans. Great example of someone well past the finding yourself phase. Nao’s in her late 30s and she seems to have come out around her mid 20s. We know there’s some things like a falling out with her father and trauma from school days bullying but this is the type of series we may never actually see it. One of the cool elements is that Mitsu already presumably knows about all this. The two have long been close because Mitsu was one of the first people Nao felt like opening up to. Based on other examples I’ve seen, it’s pretty cool how casually everyone just refers to Nao as Mitsu’s aunt. Even ends up being a cute plot point.

What’s so well set up though is that Nao is honestly an amazing foil for Mitsu as well. There’s an implication she was the standout compared to her brother. A lot of hopes pinned on that salaryman career. But on someone who was treated poorly by back home. Either way, always cool and sadly too novel to have a trans woman in a maternal role. Especially an example where the junior is not also queer. She does a great job at it and when I compared these two to that Gilmore Girls vibe it was high praise. I need more of her adorkable boyfriend Goro too!

Last are these two dorks. Yuzu & Makoto. I adore blondie’s story arc. She’s naturally pretty and legitimately enjoys fashion...but hates all the nonsense that comes with the obvious popularity. It’s a hard line to tell that story without her coming off as a brat, and it’s hard to say it resonates without sounding conceited, but it really does for me. I’ve been there, talent or beauty or intelligence attracts envy. It doesn’t feel good to deal with that. You don’t want to rub it in you just hate it ended up being a problem. You do have those times people think it’s just, okay to treat you like a doll or be nasty to you because what do you have to complain about?

But for these two, they get over that hurdle. Makoto realizes she’s being unfair and that Yuzu just wants to enjoy a group of girls that aren’t obsessed with dating. Reminds me of Mugi in K-On a bit and that’s fun.

Give this series a go, it’s got a lot of heart. Will say the official release is worth it, especially if you’re here for Nao-chan. She...has a weird way of speaking that flummoxes the scans in some scenes. Bad enough it changes the meaning. The anime adaptation is great too.

[blasphemous-bill]

Growing up in the rural southern US, I think a lot of folks don't realize just how special King of the Hill is. So much of the show rings true to real life. There are good people and there are bad people, and there are issues and problems that don't get a lot of light shed on them.

I think a lot about how misrepresented southerners are in media. I worked for years, consciously, to lose my accent, because people just assumed I was stupid or bigoted because of the way I talked. It feels like a second language now, talking with friends and family from back home.

I live a lot further north now, and it's always funny when I notice somebody slip up with their accent just a little bit. I drop into my y'all drawl as well, and suddenly we're both talking like a couple of hicks and telling stories from our childhood. People don't realize how regional the different Southern accents are. If you've traveled a little bit, you can usually guess where someone is from with a little practice.

I guess the point of this post is that I want folks to realize there are good people and allies everywhere. Yeah, the American south is Not Great™ and can be dangerous, but that's everywhere. A lot of folks in the south don't know the right words to use, or understand that their curiosity can come across as offensive. Take the time to listen, and don't make assumptions, and you might find more allies than you would expect.

[yogurtbluesideas]

the sun team, originally two squadrons of seven each called fornex and tucana, started off in a world where children were taken into orphanages to be trained under the churches watch, softly guiding them into their divine duty as “saints of the stars”, to do this they were trained young in light magic to shine in the dark and help keep their traditions and faith alive, with the recent discovery of ancient war machines passed down from their god “Kalagus the dawnstar”, soon the “star saints” were handed their “lightbringers” to toy around with, unfortunately for them, they were made to stress test the reproductions of their mechs, not being deemed worthy of the real ones, half because of their planet of origin on the edge of “allied space” and half because they were about 7-9 when they were first made to start learning to pilot them.

the Starshooter is a general mech for the holy state of the dawnstar that uses two powerful laser based cannons integrated into the arms of the machine for air to ground fire and two large shoulder mounted “meteor rifles” which fires a missile that can split into eight to rain divine fire upon their enemies, while their frames are fragile in their white and gold fabrics, they fire at such a range that other than the tower shield and sidesword, they have no real defense against close range attacks at their base configuration.

fornex squadron were an all boys squadron, with their teachings usually on how to communicate and be informed about politics and holy teaching just as much as math and science was taught to them in order to know how their mech systems worked, but with them never being able to be sent off to any actual combat, the were trapped, not able to leave the church city for any reason, as to maintain some form of constant surveillance, year after year they learn to be charismatic artists and speakers, they could probably talk down monsters, if only they had the practice with anyone outside of their “family”.

tucana squadron were an all girls squadron, also made to stay on church grounds and kept under the same surveillance, were given the role of auxiliary to the fornex squadron, as it was custom to marry the pilots of one “star seekers clan” to another, and it was simply “easier” for them to have these things arranged. tucana and fornex both generally hated this, finding themselves constantly as odds with eachother for every sparring class, both in a constant race to see who is the better part of the relationship, eventually developing into a “family” as it were,

fornex and tucana squadrons slowly began to grow on eachother, finding themselves though eachother for each argument and debate each one ending in an agreement on who was right even if that took an hour or a month, the only way the issue was resolved was if all fourteen could agree,

the issue however was when they all had a vision of them becoming heroes, pulled into a shared dream by an “angel” of their faith, only for the angel to apologize and say they weren’t “IMPORTANT” enough to be looked on by their god, this sent them all into a quiet rage, if they were not called to be saints, then why endure the torment of their regimented lives any longer, slowly they began to plot their escape, using their magic and technology to account for every last possibility on their way out, learning more and more about their magic and life beyond the city, the city, while beautiful, was nothing compared to the world around them as outside the city, life was calm, free of war and conflict, they were told the rural areas were nothing but savages and hicks, their city a bastion of the holiness of their mission, this was incorrect, so incorrect in fact that they had a question of faith, beginning to interrogate any holy man or woman they saw

evidently the church found this to be bordering on heretical, so instead of being executed they were sent on a crusade of sorts, if they fulfill their missions while in a land none return, then their belief would be proven true, if they die then they would be deemed unworthy of their title and posthumously have their sainthood removed

[turnthattfrownaround]

Something that really frustrates me is the portrayal of conservatives as stupid hicks.

The hick part is just classism plain and simple. Many (and I would argue most) people who are lower class/live in rural areas are very intelligent. The uninformed part is more due to information exposure because small poor towns don't have the resources for good schools and libraries. And then when they try to engage in information outside their community people make fun of them because they talk in a rural dialect/are learning things a bit later in life. Or they get lost because much left-leaning dialogue is written for people with access to good education. Again education ≠ intelligence.

Now lets address the rest of them, the more elite people to the far right. They are also not stupid. They know how profitable hate can be for them. They know that hate is scientifically unsupported, but they do not care which is why evidence based arguments have little effect. They don't care that transitioning is scientifically beneficial for trans people. They just enjoy the us vs. them method of recruiting voters. Calling them stupid removes accountability from them, and minimizes their actual cruelty.

But anyway tldr:

Calling the right stupid misses the real issues, and fails to address any problems or bigotry.

[bi-furiosity]

content warning for addiction, overdose, ableism, classism.

since apparently nobody on this godforsaken website knows how to google things or engage critically, some of yall been usin harm reduction in completely irrelevant ways that misconstrue what harm reduction actually is and, believe it or not, that fucking hurts people.

harm reduction: is the idea that moral judgement is not a productive aspect of addiction care and accommodating drug users. it's any practice designed to minimize the potential negative consequences of drug use and prioritizes overall well-being over stigmatizing drug use any further.

harm reduction is a relatively new idea that's only been put into practice in the past few decades, which is pretty fuckin sad considering the majority of it is common sense and was already practiced unofficially in certain marginalized communities.

what does harm reduction include? a whole lot of shit

needle exchange programs

decriminalization of drug usage

community support and outreach programs

access to naxolone (also known as Narcan,) which can reverse the effects of an opiate overdose

recovery programs

supervised injection sites

access to related healthcare without threat of discrimination or legal action

etc.

harm reduction is a wide-ranging field of strategies, it boils down to respecting drug users, meeting them where they're currently at, and keeping all involved parties as safe as possible.

addiction is horrifically stigmatized, and this stigmatization leads to families being ripped apart, people overdosing, incarceration, and a host of other consequences. for many of us, addiction is a reality that we cannot ignore. it's ourselves, our loved ones, our communities. as it stands, marginalized communities are disproportionately affected by the stigma of addiction and drug usage, especially communities of color and poor communities. i am from appalachia, and while i'm not personally in recovery, i was raised by a mother who is. i grew up going to 12-step programs, and i've seen the way the system and its view of addiction destroys lives.

i say this to show the stakes. harm reduction is the first time that the needs and humanity of addicts and drug users has really been formally considered by organizations, much less local governments. it's potentially game-changing for many people. harm reduction saves lives. it keeps kids from being raised by grandparents or in the foster care system. it keeps people from OD-ing in the streets. it gives the chance for addicts to be treated like the people they are, in a world that does nothing but vilify and kill them. every overdose could be preventable. anything that gets in the way of that costs lives.

why is this relevant rn? because people online have a habit of taking serious terminology and diluting the meaning to prove their own point. i'm telling yall right now, you cannot be doing that. i don't even want to get into the specific case that i just witnessed, because point blank, yall cannot be using this to win arguments in fandom or shed accountability. harm reduction is DEEPLY stigmatized in many of the communities its most need in. in 2015, 25 to 40 year olds in appalachia were 70% higher in terms of fatal overdoses than those outside of appalachia. (source) overall, for a lot of social and political reasons, the stigma is worse in places it's needed more. (example)

can harm reduction be used in other contexts? yes!!! absolutely! (for example, it's also utilized by sex workers.) it should be used in other contexts, when it's appropriate and productive.

do you know when it isn't productive? when you're diluting the meaning by using it when talking about fandom shit. for real, if i ever have to see this shit again i'm going to lose my mind. please understand that the misunderstanding of what harm reduction is kills people. it is not a toy for you to play with. undermining the actual purpose of harm reduction gives politicians and opponents to harm reduction more leverage to block life-saving programs that are desperately needed and sorely underfunded.

this shit is particularly relevant rn because the pandemic has led to overdose rates skyrocketing. alright? ok.

FIND A HARM REDUCTION PROGRAM NEAR YOU (x)

reading you can do: (this is not extensive, i'm fuckin exhausted from writing this shit out. if you have suggestions hmu. also they're biased towards wv and appalachia bc. hick.) Understanding Harm Reduction (available in English, Chinese, Punjabi, Farsi, French, Korean, Spanish, and Vietnamese) Reducing Stigma in Appalachia Sex Work + Harm Reduction Stigma Free WV How the Closure of Harm Reduction Changes Rural Healthcare IHRC 2019 Reading List NHRC Resource Center

[sadsongsandwaltzes]

Okok for a country music ask either

which song do you personally believe to be the absolute best country song of all time?

Or

Why do you believe that so many people people of our generation dislike country music? (because it honestly breaks my heart that good country isn't always given the love it deserves)

I can’t say it’s the best all around, there are better examples of a true country sound and musicianship, but as far as I’m concerned, Sunday Morning Coming Down is the greatest song ever written. I’ve talked about my love for this song before. A couple times actually. There is no song that resonated at my core more than that one did when I was Going Through It. But this does give me an idea to maybe long post about Kris Kristofferson sometime because he’s my favorite songwriter of all time :)

As for why people dislike country… I don’t think it’s a generational problem. I think it’s cultural mostly.

In rural America, country music is still alive and well. Outside of that…. Eh. Nashville “country” is thriving with the suburbanites who think farmhouses are actually all white, I guess. But typically this dichotomy between rural/small town Americans loving country and the rest of America hating it has existed as long as the music itself has been around. So it’s not generational. It’s cultural. And why those who are outside of the culture won’t give it a chance boils down to two reasons 1. Misconceptions or 2. Classism/“other”-ism

1. Misconceptions: this is more true now than in the past because of the gap between country music and country radio, but if I had no background knowledge of country music and turned it to country radio and heard Kane Brown, I wouldn’t be impressed either. And we’re still feeling the sting of Bro country, so everyone thinks country music is just about men objectifying women in their trucks. But even before country radio went downhill, misconceptions and stereotyping was a problem. They’d dismiss country as just “drinking and cheating songs.” Which country does have plenty of drinking songs — some better than others — but these people completely ignore how the better songs take these real and painful aspects of life and turn it into something beautiful. They ignore the songs about every other aspect of life. They ignore the stories. They ignore the musicianship. They ignore the artistry. Granted anymore it’s not entirely their fault. We need to have better representation of country music in the mainstream. Cuz country radio ain’t it.

2. -isms: mostly I’d say classism. Country music was made by the people. And the “people” include the backwoods Bible thumpin tobacco spittin hicks. It gave a voice to the poor, to the forgotten, to the every man. Most people who aren’t these people don’t want to associate with these people and they certainly don’t want The Other people trying to mingle with them and have a say in society. I mean Kris Kristofferson’s own parents disowned him because he gave up a prestigious military career to instead write songs for hillbillies. His parents wanted nothing to do with that. They didn’t want to associate with hillbilly music and viewed him as an embarrassment to their family and cut him out of their lives. Country music is rooted in the truth. Of course his parents couldn’t stand it — people like that don’t care about what is real, they only care about appearances. Being in good standing with ~ society ~. And isn’t that just the whole thing? Really the correct -ism is classism. And it’s not even necessarily that all people of a higher class don’t enjoy country music and that all poor people do — it’s the desire to be a higher class, or at the very least perceived as such. And that’s the actual heart of classism. Of course, I also tied in the divide between rural and suburban/urban. But I don’t think that’s the biggest issue here. I think it’s class. I think it’s wanting be seen as high class. And poor people are viewed as low class. And rural people are viewed as low class 🤷🏼‍♀️ either way, it’s dumb hillbilly music to them. But the people who don’t care about that kind of shallow stuff — no matter what their actual tax bracket is or what culture they came from — this obviously isn’t a problem for them if they don’t care about being viewed as “higher” than others. I’m not talking about them.

Well… I’m sure this post will be received well lol.

Also, I’m not saying you have to like country music. We all have different taste. It’s more so the disrespect that country music gets. Even if you don’t like it or it’s just not your thing, you should at least be able to respect it as a legitimate art form.

[tcm]

How Do I Corrupt Thee?...Let Me Count The Ways By Theresa Brown

Facing the most consequential American presidential election of the 20th century...let’s talk movies. Movies are important because they help us see things once removed that we sometimes don’t see right in front of our very eyes. One of the great political movies in cinema is ALL THE KING’S MEN (‘49). The acting in this film is top notch with everyone demonstrating what happens when one’s values are compromised, and what happens when they’re not.

Willie Stark – Demagogue

“You’re a hick and nobody ever helped a hick but a hick himself...You’re hicks too and they fooled you 1000 times like they fooled me. Now I’m gonna fool somebody. I’m going to STAY in this race. I’m on my own and I’m out for blood. Now listen to me, you hicks... Nail up anybody who stands in your way.”

The star is Broderick Crawford as Willie Stark, who gives a towering performance that earned him a well-deserved Academy Award. Son of comedic actress Helen Broderick, Crawford’s been around since 1937 appearing in nothing memorable that would set him apart from the crowd. But he got the opportunity to play this role and he’s great. As Willie Stark, he starts off as a low-level, small-town community organizer/lawyer with a devoted wife and son. He wants to run for office, thinks he can do some good. He takes a real licking in the election.

Stark unknowingly gets used by the power brokers to split the ‘hick’ vote. As long as he stays in his lane so the big boys can put in their candidate for governor, he’ll be okay. But a tag-along reporter sees that Willie is being framed and tries to offer him a little campaign advice to be more of himself:

“Look Willie, you tell ‘em too much. Just tell ‘em you’re gonna soak the fat boys and forget the rest of the tax stuff...Willie, make ‘em cry, make ‘em laugh. Make ‘em mad, even mad at you...But for heaven’s sake, don’t try and improve their mind.”

To finish the job of opening Willie’s eyes with a crowbar, booze and a drunken bang is the political operative sent to babysit Willie. She tells him: “You know what you are? Why, you were the goat. You are the sacrificial goat. You’re a sap because you let ‘em!!”

And with that wakeup call, he quits being a stooge and tells the people how he really feels about their condition. He gives his famous “I’m a hick...” speech. There’s a great montage and voice-over by John Ireland showing Willie’s rise to the top: the deals he makes, the threats he levies, the hands he shakes and the dames he messes around with. He takes to it all like a duck to water now that he plays in the swamp with the rest of them. His home life falls by the wayside, compartmentalized into a little back corner in the dusty rural area he’s from, and he keeps his enemies closer.

Willie’s got a slick coat to him now. He ups his game with proper diction. Upgrades his women, too. He goes from Anne Seymour (sincere working class) to Mercedes McCambridge (pitbull powerbroker) to Joanne Dru (bubble-wrapped high society girl). He starts to use people, squeeze them and throw ‘em away. He’s got power now...and wants more.

The Reporter: “You throw money around like it was money.”

Crawford: “Money? I don’t need money. People give me things.”

The Reporter: “Why?”

Crawford: “Because they believe in me.”

Sadie Burke - Power Broker

“If you won’t let me sleep you might at least give me a drink... You’re not going to be governor.... You’ve been framed you poor sap. And how. Oh, you decoy. You wooden-headed decoy.”

No time like the present to bring Mercedes McCambridge into my essay. Sadie is Willie’s equal and she is magnificent! McCambridge takes the working girl mantle from Rosalind Russell and wears that pin-striped suit like an armadillo’s skin. She’s one of the boys in the back room of smoky politics. And she looks just grand in there. She fits. She’s all about getting paid. She smokes, she drinks, she flicks cigarettes. She’s not the glamour girl but she’s got balls and can get you where you need to go. She’s what you need when you want power. She clutches, she claws, she growls and she spits out words like a sub-machine gun.

And she doesn’t mince words. She can spot potential. She feels a kindred spirit in John Ireland, like she can level with him. She thinks he’s a bit like her; but he’s really not. And she totally sees something in Willie Stark. She wants in on the ride just like everybody else. She fancies herself as the one to control the power. But underneath all that, she’s a woman. She gets jealous (“Was she pretty?”). Her comparing herself to her society rival is a poignant scene. You can tell she doesn’t get tender loving.

But McCambridge does not shy away from who Sadie is; there’s no heart of gold. She ends that scene with a growl.

Jack Burden - Observant Reporter

Editor: “Stark is getting too big for his britches. The Hicks are getting too smart. We are now supporting Harrison.”

Burden: “How do you square that?”

Editor: “I work here.”

Burden: “Well I don’t, not anymore.

Editor: “...You won’t find it easy to get another job.”

Burden: “I’m too rich to work.”

John Ireland plays newspaper man Jack Burden sent to cover this fluke of a human interest story that is Willie Stark. He is a rich young man trying to find himself, not wanting to rely on his wealthy stepfather. He serves as us, the audience/bystander/observer of events. He has principles and believes Willie can do some good. Burden’s also in love with a girl from his set and works towards being an independent success so he can marry her. But...his hands get dirty too.

He brings lambs to slaughter introducing, or delivering, his wealthy family and friends to Willie...including his fiancée. He watches Willie change and give in to power and is horrified. But he doesn’t leave. By the end of it, Jack’s holding on to the tail of a comet. He betrays friends and sheds principles like a viral load. When Jack tries to convince an old friend that Willie is right, his friend says:

“He’s right because you want him to be right. Because you’re afraid to admit you made a mistake.”

Anne Stanton - Society Girl

Anne: “I understand you. It’s myself I don’t understand... Maybe we’d better stop seeing each other.”

Willie: “No. No we won’t stop seeing each other, will we?”

Anne: “No.”

Willie: “Because you believe what I tell you.”

Anne: “Because I believe what you tell me.”

I always thought Joanne Dru was an interesting actress. Never could quite peg her as a specific type. She gives off a Gene Tierney-vibe to me in this movie. She plays Anne Stanton, the society girl the reporter’s been in love with. She tells the reporter (Ireland) she wants him to be somebody...he wants to marry her...she promises to wait for him. But he drifts from job to job. How long’s a girl supposed to wait, and why wait when Willie is already there? Willie’s stepping up in class when he’s got Anne Stanton strung out over him. Yeah, strung out. She seems addicted or doing something she’s not very happy doing; that she can’t help doing. Is she another innocent bystander swept up in things? Is it love at first sight after she first hears him speak? I don’t know about love, but she is drawn to him. She’s intoxicated by power. Disillusionment will be hard.

ALL THE KING’S MEN is a solid movie; practically ripped from today’s headlines. It feels adult. It doesn’t feel dated. It speaks to our current political climate in so many ways. Power seems to suck people in like a vortex. Some go through a sort of “I wish I could quit you.” The movie is a lesson for us. We can look at the Willie Starks of the world and learn to recognize a demagogue when he’s rallying right in front of our eyes.

[nerdkiller]

It is so hilarious to me how we see this new trend of (mainly white) upper class people who lived in the suburbs/city their whole life now romanticizing rural living (i.e. cottagecore) when they hold classist views against the people who actually DO live in rural/backwoods America. Y'all are so hateful with your perceptions of us as nothing but a bunch of dumb, uncultured hicks-you have no sympathy or respect. Rural living isn't just cute gardens and peace and quiet and chilling with the flora and fauna. It's underfunded and poorly staffed schools for your kids, poor and inaccessible healthcare, drugs being far far easier to obtain than therapy (not to mention the longstanding stigma against seeking help for mental illness), lack of concern from establishment leadership that sit up at DC for 30 years and never do anything to enact real change, generational poverty, being left behind and ignored by the rest of America. Y'all are stuck in this fantasy of escaping from your rich neighborhoods to go live in the idyllic countryside while living out of your parents' deep pockets

[papermoonloveslucy]

PETER LEEDS

May 30, 1917

Peter Leeds was born in Bayonne, NJ.  Leeds received his training at the Neighborhood Playhouse. He received a scholarship from the John Marshall Law School, which he attended for one year. He also attended The Neighborhood Playhouse School of the Theatre in NYC.  He was in four Broadway shows, including the original cast of The Music Man (1957) starring Robert Preston, who would later be Lucille Ball’s leading man in Mame (1974).  He was also in the original cast of Sugar Babies (1979) starring Lucille Ball’s co-stars Ann Miller and Mickey Rooney. 

He made his film debut with a bit part in Public Enemies (1941) which also starred William Frawley (Fred Mertz).  He made his television debut in 1949 with an episode of “Oboler’s Comedy Theatre”.  It is said that by the time of his passing he had appeared on television 8,000 times!   

In October 1952 he made his first of two appearance on “I Love Lucy” playing a reporter interviewing the Maharincess of Franistan in “The Publicity Agent” (ILL S1;E31).

He must have made a good impression, because he was cast as the Garage Manager in Lucy and Desi’s film The Long, Long Trailer, released in early 1954.  

In May 1955, Leeds made an appearance on Desilu’s “Willy” starring June Havoc in the title role.

From 1953 to 1956, Leeds did seven episodes as various characters on “Our Miss Brooks" a series filmed at Desilu Studios.  

In September 1957, he appeared on Desilu’s “The Sheriff of Cochise” and a month later an episode of Desilu’s “Official Detective"

He returned to “I Love Lucy” for “Lucy and Bob Hope” (ILL S6;E1) filmed on June 5, 1956, and aired as the season six opener on October 1, 1956. Leeds plays a security guard at Yankee Stadium, making sure that Bob Hope isn’t bothered by his fans.  Lucy figures out that does not include hot dog vendors!  Leeds’ character doesn’t have a name, but when Lucy says that her husband is Ricky Ricardo, he replies that he is Phoebe Krausfeld’s husband!  

It is no coincidence that Leeds returns for this particular episode. He had teamed with Bob Hope on 14 USO shows, as well as multiple films and TV programs: “The Red Skelton Hour: Clem and Married Life” (1951), “The Bob Hope Show” (13 episodes, 1955-1967), “The Colgate Comedy Hour” (1955), The Facts of Life (1960, with Lucy), “The Bob Hope Christmas Show” (1962, 1965), “The Bing Crosby Show” (1964), “The Bob Hope Comedy Special” (1965, 1966 with Lucy, 1972), I’ll Take Sweden (1965), The Oscar (1966), Eight on the Lam (1967), “Bob Hope Lampoons Show Business” (1990), and “Bob Hope and Friends: Making New Memories” (1991).  

In 1958 and 1959 he appeared on two episodes of Desilu’s “December Bride.”

In April 1959, Leeds originated the role of LaMarr Kane on “The Westinghouse Desilu Playhouse” two-part premiere of “The Untouchables.”  When the show went to series, however, Leeds was replaced by Chuck Hicks.  In March 1960, he was cast in an episode of the series titled “Three Thousand Suspects” playing Nick Segal.  He also appeared in a 1959 feature film re-formatting of the pilot produced by Desilu named The Scarface Mob.

In May and November 1959, Leeds was seen in two episodes of Desilu’s “The Ann Sothern Show" playing two different characters. Lucille Ball played Lucy Ricardo on the series in October 1959. 

In February 1960, he appeared as a corporate executive on Desilu’s “The Real McCoys” in an episode that also featured “Lucy” regulars Frank Nelson and Dick Elliott.  

He returned to “The Westinghouse Desilu Playhouse” in January 1961 for an episode titled “Poker Game” hosted by Desi Arnaz. 

Leeds played Mr. Thompson, the dry cleaner in the 1960 Hope / Ball film The Facts of Life.

In 1961 and 1962 he played two different policemen on “The Dick Van Dyke Show” filmed by Desilu. 

In September 1962 Leeds appeared on a “The Comedy Spot” (a show that aired failed pilots) produced by Desilu. "Time Out for Ginger” was a pilot starring Candy Moore, who had just been cast as Lucille Ball’s daughter on “The Lucy Show.” 

In 1963, he was back in blue at Desilu for an episode of “My Three Sons” titled “My Friend Ernie” featuring William Frawley.  

From 1956 to 1964 Leeds made three appearances as different characters on “Make Room for Daddy” aka “The Danny Thomas Show”.   In his first appearance he played a jazz pianist that didn’t jive with Danny.  The series was filmed by Desilu.  In late 1959 / early 1960, the series did reciprocal cross-over episodes with “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour.” 

At Desilu Studios, he filmed six episode of “The Joey Bishop Show" from 1961 to 1965, the final appearance as... a policeman, of course. 

Leeds appeared on all three of the ‘Hooterville’ sitcoms known as the CBS Rural Comedies: “The Beverly Hillbillies” (4 episodes 1963-68), “Green Acres” (2 episodes 1963 & 1968), and “Petticoat Junction” (3 episodes 1965-67).  

In 1971, he was reunited with Lucille Ball for an episode of “Here’s Lucy” titled “Lucy and the Candid Camera” (HL S4;E14) once again playing a policeman. The episode featured “Candid Camera” founder Allen Funt as himself, and a nefarious look-alike.  

His final screen appearance was in the 1988 big screen remake of Dragnet.  Desilu veterans Kathleen Freeman, and Harry Morgan were also in the film and, like Leeds, had done episodes of the original series.  Leeds had done three episodes of the series in 1953, 1954, and 1955.  

He died on November 12, 1996 at age 79. He was married twice and had one child. 

[alexsfictionaddiction]

Spookiest Middle-Grade Books For Halloween

There’s something very special about books that set you up for a cosy ride and then take a dark turn. I find that most middle-grade horror and supernatural books do this and the clever offsetting of places that should be so familiar -schools, family homes and small suburban towns- can be so unsettling. Whether it’s encounters with spirits, investigating grisly mysteries or fighting monsters, spooky middle-grade books are the ideal whimsical companion to a night in front of the fire. Enjoy my selection! -Love, Alex x

1. Coraline by Neil Gaiman

When Coraline moves into a new house with her parents, it’s not long before she discovers a door to a world that perfectly mirrors the one she came from, only things look ever so slightly... different. This incredibly creepy macabre and wonderfully written story is an October staple for me and it’s the perfect introduction to dark fantasy for children. The film is one of my favourites of all time, so be sure to watch that after you’ve read it! 

2. The House With A Clock In Its Walls by John Bellairs

When orphan Lewis goes to stay with his uncle Jonathan, he has no idea that he’s about to discover that both Jonathan and his neighbour Mrs Zimmermann are magic wielders. Through a string of unfortunate experiments, Lewis ends up unleashing the angry spirit of the evil previous owner of the house who is hell-bent on destroying the human race. This whimsical book was published in the 1970s but it still holds up as strong, dark, magical tomfoolery with a just-scary-enough Gothic vibe, which is perfect for young spooksters.

3. City of Ghosts by Victoria Schwab

Cassidy’s parents have a ghosthunting TV show but it’s Cass who can really see ghosts, including her best friend Jacob who happens to be one. When her parents’ TV show takes them to the haunted streets of Edinburgh, Cass comes face to face with a less than pleasant mission and a deadly threat. Coated in a mist that dawdles on every page, Schwab’s middle-grade novel is a fantastic ghost adventure story, full of darkness and friendship.

4. Small Spaces by Katherine Arden

When the bus breaks down on the way back from a school trip to an old farm, the driver warns the kids that they’d better run. Only Ollie and two of her friends heed his warning and enter the dark woods, flanked by scarecrows...  It has a wonderfully disturbing, folksy, rural vibe and Arden is a master at conjuring an ominous unseen presence. If you weren’t afraid of scarecrows before reading this book, you will be after!

5. The Jumbies by Tracey Baptiste

Fearless Corinne finds herself following a suspected jumbie into the forest and the next day, she spots a strange woman in town. When this strange woman begins to get close to her father, Corinne learns an ancient magic to try to stop the jumbies from taking over the island. Drawing on Haitian folklore, this is a wonderfully unique tale of threat and magic that thoroughly transports its readers.

6. Crater Lake by Jennifer Killick

When a Year Six class turn up to a deserted Crater Lake activity camp, the extra-terrestrial horrors are only just about to begin and no one is getting any sleep. There is a lot of humour in this book, which juxtaposes the bizarre, horrific events that are happening and it makes for the perfect light-hearted, sci-fi horror story. Indulge in a quick fix of alien madness alongside a fantastic band of characters.

7. The Hungry Ghost by H. S. Norup

When Danish-born Freja arrives in Singapore to spend the summer with her father and stepmother, she is just in time for The Hungry Ghost festival, the time of year where spirits can roam amongst the living. Suddenly, she is seeing and spending time with a mysterious ghost girl who seems to have a connection to her family. Set against a stunning backdrop, this is a beautiful new novel, full of mythology and Asian culture as well as a compelling story and fantastic characterisations.

8. The Creakers by Tom Fletcher

When Lucy wakes up one morning and all of the adults in her town have vanished, she’s a little confused to say the least. All the kids are causing chaos but Lucy just wants to find out what really happened. The Creakers have other ideas though... Full of imagination and intrigue, this is a mystery novel like no other. The Creakers serve just the right amount of creep to unsettle you and it’s dotted with smile-inducing moments. It’s the ideal Halloween read for the younger end of middle-graders.

9. The Haunting of Aveline Jones by Phil Hickes

When ghost story lover Aveline spends some time at her aunt’s house in a small coastal town, she uncovers the key to a long-buried mystery. A tale of friendship, tragedy and spook ensues. Hickes is great at developing a brooding, unfeeling atmosphere and this haunts every page of his book. I did cry at several parts  because it is such a beautiful, chilling read. Wrap up warm for this one!

10. The Ghost of Gosswater by Lucy Strange

When Lady Agatha is thrown out of her family home, she has to make a new life for herself in a small cottage while dealing with the fact that a stranger may be her real father. But a ghost girl is haunting the local lake and she could hold the answers as to who Agatha really is. Set in 1899, this Gothic ghost story is thoroughly compelling, incredibly eerie and expertly written in an almost poetic fashion. A fantastic reading choice for a Halloween night!

[scientia-rex]

Had to think real hard today about why I get so tense and worked up listening to an attending who I KNOW is a bisexual woman and who is an expert on LGBTQIA+ health give talks about said topic to our residency. And like, I think there are several things at play.

There is, of course, always my internalized sexism. Just because I spend a lifetime fighting it doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Men are better has been seeping into my brain like noxious fumes since I was born, it permeates every aspect of my culture, of course it’s present in my own brain on an insidious level. So I probably trust her less than I would trust a man.

She doesn’t think I’m funny, which doesn’t help.

I never believe than an attending, or any authority figure, will believe me. About anything. Parental issues ahoy! And therefore I do not believe that she believes me about my own lived experiences, which are different than hers. I am a rural queer. My life has been different than the life of a city queer. I don’t enjoy being condescended to because someone thinks that I, a mere simple country hick, cannot possibly have a nuanced understanding of queer theory and history.

It’s not like we talk much! I have no idea whether I’m right or not about this. But my brain, at a fundamental and deeply unpleasant level, believes it.

Furthermore, I hate watching someone else talk to straight people about the LGBTQIA+ community. First off, do they genuinely understand all the letters? Does the presenter, whose job it should be to understand that ally and asexual are among contenders for the A, and how different the conversation looks depending on how you hold that particular prism and how you think of allies? Does the audience? Do they know that Q has stood for queer and questioning? That intersex people have varying opinions about their inclusion in this community? That race deeply impacts experience of sexual orientation and gender identity? That some people include TS for two-spirit in this and others argue strongly against it, that indigenous people have very different perspectives on inclusion and assimilation into the Western gender binary among their own community? That the letters themselves are sources of great division and strife? That the words have become not just an acronym but a euphemism in common conversation to the point where people will call a gay cis man “LGBTQ” rather than “gay”?

Are we going to have to go back over Gayness 101 for these people?

And I hate watching straight people respond to these talks. Because straight people want to feel things. They want to wring their feelings out of us like a washcloth. They want to see examples of how tragic we are, they want to be reassured that we are always and only one-dimensional and that dimension is tragedy, they want to cry a little bit about how we’ve suffered, and then they want to walk away and forget about us. They want to use us for catharsis.

They do not want us to be people. They refuse to see us as people. We are not complicated and multi-faceted; we are there to be subhuman objects of their interest, something to project their own sexual insecurities onto and then vilify, pity, and discard.

It is INFURIATING. And I’m white! I can only imagine how much more of a shit sandwich interacting with straight white people must be for queer people of color, when even interacting with queer white people is full of racist bullshit for them!

So, even though I generally trust the attending, mostly, to get things right, I’m still waiting with a kind of urgent dread for someone to say something shitty--maybe her, accidentally; maybe an audience member. I’m waiting for someone to tell me I don’t matter, in one way or another. I’m waiting to get shit on, because that is what happens when I interact with straight people about queerness. As a bisexual/pansexual/queer let’s go with “woman” for the sake of argument (I’d identify more as agender than anything else but being seen as a cis woman doesn’t particularly bother me) I am so used to getting shit on not only by straight people I interact with but also gay men (who need to confront their own sexism and misogyny! being seen as inherently feminine by a society that cannot stop equating sexual behavior with gender does not make you an expert on women!) and lesbians (THANKS FOR CALLING ME A SLUTTY TRAITOR TO MY FACE!) that just bringing up the subject in meatspace is enough to have my palms sweaty with fear.

ANYWAY. Anyway. Unexpectedly stressful. Somebody has to teach straight people that we keep existing despite their best efforts, it might as well be her as me, and she does do a good job of it. I just prefer it to be me because I know I’m an engaging speaker. I use a lot of plain language, I’m funny, I get the audience involved. And when I’m engaged, I’m not waiting for the next ball of shit to land.