#That discovering who you are and what defines you and where you go from there ripples through all of them

[askatriangleandastar]

I'll elaborate later but for the core essentials: The Sun and Moon Show (as well as the other shows of the same team) have a theme about figuring out one's self and how the choice to grow or stagnate further impacts those around them.

Its seen with Roxanne, in her initial self-obsession, lashing out after getting freedom from the Chip, and then how she's been growing as a person and parent currently.

Its visible in Funtime Freddy and how lost be was without BonBon and Shadow Freddy in the want to matter, to do good but finding power in fear and darkness at Freddy's rejection of his magic.

Sun and Moon in so many ways have had things get to this point from trying to figure out who they are when not a part of the same form. Of Sun initially relying on fulfilling the role he was made for to the best he could to determine how he acts and interacts with others (chiding them on language, conversation topics, withholding reactions of anger when stressed, etc). With Moon trying to go as far from who he was before, when he had so little control over what he could do, how he could feel, and how it to this day drives him into making plans and tech for security.

Eclipse coming from Sun, still being a part of Sun that is again and again rejected. . .. it honestly fits Moon's assertion that Eclipse isn't a person, why Eclipse can't stand to be entirely alone even in a timeline where he succeeded. It's easy to miss with how he's acted further on, but there were times Eclipse had been clingy, brittle, more stressed and clawing to importance than a mastermind.

To know what could get under Sun's circuits in one line, if that was an insecurity he knows best... Dark Reflections my beloved, I may be getting incomprehensible but more to be said, for certain.

[eldritchamy]

I think I've figured out a good way to articulate one of the reasons Human Domestication Guide is hitting for me in a way really not much else has done for a long time.

HDG is an inverse fandom.

Whereas a lot of fanfiction (maybe just for the sake of the pun we can expand outwards, wink, and call them "transformative works") takes at the core of its nature a specific character or group of characters, and then transplants (sorry, I had to) those characters into Alternate Universes in order to keep telling altered, revised, and original stories with those CHARACTERS, while changing everything else, HDG does the opposite.

It takes the SETTING as the core defining feature, and creates original CHARACTERS in order to tell original stories.

And that's really cool for reasons that, of course, ended up becoming another gigantic one of Amy's Patented Infodump Posts.

Most fanfiction gets to appeal to its audience because of the associations and attachments readers have for the CHARACTERS, and then create a new story from there without having to spend time setting up WHO THE STORY IS ABOUT for you. I don't say this as a bad thing, that's just the attraction. The readers bring their attachment to the characters WITH them before they start reading.

HDG gets to assume you understand the SETTING as a basic premise, and then tell new stories with original characters without having to hold your hand through as much of the set up work, because you already know the SETTING going in.

So instead of discovering how the characters you know relate to a world you don't (and to each other within that context), you get stories where you get to discover who the characters ARE, in the context of a world you already understand.

It's not "what does a different setting do to these characters." It's "how do different people navigate this setting."

You get to meet and learn and identify with the CHARACTERS because you see how they as unique people react to a set premise.

So much of what I've read so far has done exceptional work establishing who the characters are, even making MINOR characters within the story feel like fleshed out people.

You'd think in a setting that takes at face value the premise of humanity being subjugated and doted on by a species that uses mind control drugs to turn them into docile, obedient pets, the stories would struggle a bit with sameness as the individuality of the characters failed to shine through or were inevitably suppressed over the course of the plot.

In practice, it seems like almost the OPPOSITE is true.

The Affini always win. But every character chooses to lose to them in a different way that speaks to who they are as people.

Getting to explore these unique stories through the eyes of unique characters seems like it's making it EASIER to latch on to what makes THESE characters the focus of the stories being told.

And so far the stories being told are fucking great, and have such a huge range to them.

The original story for the setting is a VERY non consensual medfet/drug play subjugation story where Elvira (captain of a ship for the Free Terran feralist rebellion) is ABSOLUTELY brought into domestication by force (at first), and we get to see the PROCESS of her being broken down and becoming something new over the course of (what we later learn has been ONLY) about three weeks. She's not the same person she was at the start of the story. At all. She's been utterly replaced by a new identity and personality that the old version of her would never have accepted. (Also it's kinda hot that it's actually good for her, and that she very much DOES end up happier for it. She's still Elvira. But she's safe, and she's loved.)

That's a pretty specific vibe for a story.

But the next story I read in the setting takes place over the course of several hours in-universe, and basically follows a dysfunctional, clearly neurodivergent woman stagnating in the limbo of having been failed by capitalism (or in her mind, failing at it) and having mixed feelings about the staggeringly powerful alien civilization that is currently part way through conquering her planet and its people.

The story starts off when she's so hungry after scraping through what scant, nutritionless garbage she was able to find in the capitalist dystopia that it finally overrides her fear, and she goes to the border of Affini-controlled territory in her city. She figures, they're going to do whatever they're going to do to the rest of the city within a few days anyway, so there's no sense pretending whatever outcome she's walking into wasn't inevitable, and even if it's not as good as the Affini promise, at least it's not what she's been stuck in. Fear of sameness finally becomes more traumatic than fear of change.

She proceeds to go on an adorable lesbian grocery date with a 10 foot tall plant that gently flirts with her while remaining very firm that all of this human's needs CAN and SHOULD and WILL be taken care of FOR her from now on, and it's OKAY that she has trouble focusing because it's OKAY that some people need more help than others.

She spends several chapters experiencing repeated Lesbian Bluescreens because of this sweet, doting alien who insists it's no trouble at all and she's happy to help. Then said alien takes her back to her apartment on the human side to make sure she feels safe getting there through the anti-Affini protests, and then in a matter of minutes she has cleaned this girl's entire disaster of an apartment and promised to cook her a nice Terran pizza.

Then the girl has a lesbian panic attack while coming to terms with how much misery she didn't have to be living with, and whether this future isn't exactly what she always hoped for and more, so the alien offers to give her some alien drugs to calm her down, and her now fuzzy brain accidentally crumbles under the weight of all the secret petplay fantasies that have been turning her face red all morning and she accidentally calls the alien "Mistress", and then she goes home to THEIR place back in Affini territory with her new owner and gets absolutely spoiled until she falls asleep feeling safe and loved for the first time in her life.

COMPLETE tonal shift from the original story, but the LOGIC of the story is fully consistent with the setting. It's just a different character responding to that setting in a different way.

The range of what's possible is ENORMOUS.

I went from there to "two humans captured at different times struggle to find their way back to each other and end up with neural implants plugged into each other's brains by their shared Mistress, and the feedback loop helps them domesticate EACH OTHER" and then from there to a mostly historical context story about an Affini who lived for almost 300,000 years and how she feels about the Compact's role in everything they've done to the universe.

And then I got to read "I have to pretend to be a good little floret maid at an Affini Compact hotel because that's my Genius Spy Cover WHOOPS it turns out being a maid means getting teased and played with a lot WHOOPS, OHHhhh NOOOoo~ I'VE BEEN TURNED INTO A FREE USE HYPNO DOLL because EVERYONE KNEW I WAS A SPY THE WHOLE TIME, I'm going to resolve my mixed feelings by erotically betraying my co-conspirator so we can be floret girlfriends together," which was cute, funny, and INCREDIBLY hot.

Seriously, chapter 10 of that story. Holy FUCK. I think my brain has turned fully inside out. I had a DREAM kinda like it afterwards that I wish I could remember more of.

I guess my point is HDG is less like a fandom and more like DND.

It's a shared universe of collaborative storytelling, even if any individual work within it was made by one person.

You get to play within a core set of rules for how the setting works, but the stories that can come out of playing by those rules are so incredible and diverse and interesting, and I'm really enjoying getting to explore all of that within the context of a basic premise that has absolutely grabbed most of my kinks by the throat, stared menacingly into my eyes, and smirked knowingly.

Also it's INCREDIBLY queer and very obviously made specifically for gay autistic trans women who take progesterone, so I guess just like the rest of the little Terrans, I never stood a chance.

[denimbex1986]

'...“It’s fun playing bad, but actually he’s not,” the actor says, smiling as he reflects on his character, Crowley. “He’s a villain with a heart. The amount of really evil things he does are vanishingly small.”

...As it always has, “Good Omens” dissects the view of good and evil as absolutes, showing viewers that they are not as separate as we were led to believe growing up. Aziraphale and Crowley’s long-standing union is proof of this. The show also urges people to look at what defines our own humanity. For Tennant — who opted to wear a T-shirt emblazoned with the words “Leave trans kids alone you absolute freaks” during a photocall for Season 2 — these themes are more important now than ever before.

“In this society that we’re currently living in, where polarization seems ever more present, fierce and difficult to navigate. Negotiation feels like a dirty word at times,” he says, earnestly. “This is a show about negotiation. Two extremes finding common ground and making their world a better place through it. Making life easier, kinder and better. If that’s the sort of super objective of the show, then I can’t think of anything more timely, relevant or apt for the rather fractious times we’re living in.”

“Good Omens” is back by popular demand for another season. How does it feel?

It’s lovely. Whenever you send something out into the world, you never quite know how it will land. Especially with this, because it was this beloved book that existed, and that creates an extra tension that you might break some dreams. But it really exploded. I guess we were helped by the fact that we had Neil Gaiman with us, so you couldn’t really quibble too much with the decisions that were being made. The reception was, and continues to be, overwhelming.

Now that you’re no longer bound by the original material that people did, perhaps, feel a sense of ownership over, does the new content for Season 2 come with a sense of freedom for you? This is uncharted territory, of sorts.

That’s an interesting point. I didn’t know the book when I got the script. It was only after that I discovered the worlds of passion that this book had incited. Because I came to it that way, perhaps it was easier. I found liberation from that, to an extent. For me, it was always a character that existed in a script. At first, I didn’t have that extra baggage of expectation, but I acquired it in the run-up to Season 1 being released… the sense that suddenly we were carrying a ming vase across a minefield.

In Season 2, we still have Neil and we also have some of the ideas that he and Terry had discussed. During the filming of the first one, Neil would drop little hints about the notions they had for a prospective sequel, the title of which would have been “668: The Neighbour of the Beast,” which is a pretty solid gag to base a book around. Indeed there were elements like Gabriel and the Angels, who don’t feature in the book, that were going to feature in a sequel. They were brought forward into Season 1. So, even in the new episodes, we’re not entirely leaving behind the Terry Pratchett-ness of it all.

It’s great to see yourself and Michael Sheen reunited on screen as these characters. Fans will have also watched you pair up for Season 3 of “Staged.” You’re quite the dynamic duo. What do you think is the magic ingredient that makes the two of you such a good match?

It’s a slightly alchemical thing. We knew each other in passing before, but not well. We were in a film together [“Bright Young Things,” 1993] but we’d never shared a scene. It was a bit of a roll of the dice when we turned up at the read-through for “Good Omens.” I think a lot comes from the writing, as we were both given some pretty juicy material to work with. Those characters are beloved for a reason because there’s something magical about them and the way they complete each other. Also, I think we’re quite similar actors in the way we like to work and how we bounce off each other.

Does the shorthand and trust the two of you have built up now enable you to take more risks on-screen?

Yes, probably. I suppose the more you know someone, the more you trust someone. You don’t have to worry about how an idea might be received and you can help each other out with a more honest opinion than might be the case if you were, you know, dancing around each other’s nervous egos. Enjoying being in someone’s orbit and company is a positive experience. It makes going to work feel pleasant, productive, and creative. The more creative you can be, the better the work is. I don’t think it’s necessarily a given that an off-screen relationship will feed into an on-screen one in a positive or negative way. You can play some very intimate moments with someone you barely know. Acting is a peculiar little contract, in that respect. But it’s disproportionately pleasurable going to work when it’s with a mate.

Fans have long discussed the nature of Crowley and Aziraphale’s relationship. In Season 2, we see several of the characters debate whether the two are an item, prompting them to look at their union and decipher what it is. How would you describe their relationship?

They are utterly co-dependent. There’s no one else having the experience that they are having and they’ve only got each other to empathize with. It’s a very specific set of circumstances they’ve been dealt. In this season, we see them way back at the creation of everything. They’ve known each other a long time and they’ve had to rely on each other more and more. They can’t really exist one without the other and are bound together through eternity. Crowley and Aziraphale definitely come at the relationship with different perspectives, in terms of what they’re willing to admit to the relationship being. I don’t think we can entirely interpret it in human terms, I think that’s fair to say.

Yet fans are trying to do just that. Do you view it as beyond romantic or any other labels, in the sense that it’s an eternal force?

It’s lovely [that fans discuss it] but you think, be careful what you wish for. If you’re willing for a relationship to go in a certain way or for characters to end up in some sort of utopian future, then the story is over. Remember what happened to “Moonlighting,” that’s all I’m saying! [Laughs]

Your father-in-law, Peter Davison, and your son, Ty Tennant, play biblical father-and-son duo Job and Ennon in Episode 2. In a Tumblr Q&A, Neil Gaiman said that he didn’t know who Ty’s family was when he cast him. When did you become aware that Ty had auditioned?

I don’t know how that happened. I do a bunch of self-tapes with Ty, but I don’t think I did this one with him because I was out of town filming “Good Omens.” He certainly wasn’t cast before we started shooting. There were two moments during filming where Neil bowled up to me and said, “Guess, who we’ve cast?” Ty definitely auditioned and, as I understand it, they would tell me, he was the best. I certainly imagine he could only possibly have been the best person for the job. He is really good in it, so I don’t doubt that’s true. And then my father-in-law showed up, as well, which was another delicious treat. In the same episode and the same family! It was pretty weird. I have worked with both of them on other projects, but never altogether.

There’s a “Doctor Who” cameo, of sorts, in Episode 5, when Aziraphale uses a rare annual about the series as a bartering tool. In reality, you’ll be reprising your Time Lord role on screen later this year in three special episodes to mark the 60th anniversary. Did you always feel you’d return to “Doctor Who” at some point?

There’s a precedent for people who have been in the series to return for a multi-doctor show, which is lovely. I did it myself for the 50th anniversary in 2013, and I had a wonderful time with Matt [Smith]. Then, to have John Hurt with us, as well, was a little treat. But I certainly would never have imagined that I’d be back in “Doctor Who” full-time, as it were, and sort of back doing the same job I did all those years ago. It was like being given this delightful, surprise present. Russell T Davies was back as showrunner, Catherine Tate [former on-screen companion] was back, and it was sort of like the last decade and a half hadn’t happened.

Going forward, Ncuti Gatwa will be taking over as the new Doctor. Have you given him any advice while passing the baton?

Oh God, what a force of nature. I’ve caught a little bit of him at work and it’s pretty exciting. I mean, what advice would you give someone? You can see Ncuti has so much talent and energy. He’s so inspired and charismatic. The thing about something like this is: it’s the peripherals, it’s not the job. It’s the other stuff that comes with it, that I didn’t see coming. It’s a show that has so much focus and enthusiasm on it. It’s not like Ncuti hasn’t been in a massive Netflix series [“Sex Education,”] but “Doctor Who” is on a slightly different level. It’s cross-generational, international, and has so much history, that it feels like it belongs to everyone.

To be at the center of the show is wonderful and humbling, but also a bit overwhelming and terrifying. It doesn’t come without some difficulties, such as the immediate loss of anonymity. It takes a bit of getting used to if that’s not been your life up to that point. I was very lucky that when I joined, Billie Piper [who portrayed on-screen companion, Rose] was still there. She’d lived in a glare of publicity since she was 14, so she was a great guide for how to live life under that kind of scrutiny. I owe a degree of sanity to Billie.

Your characters are revered by a few different fandoms. Sci-fi fandoms are especially passionate and loyal. What is it like being on the end of that? I imagine it’s a lot to hold.

Yes, certainly. Having been a fan of “Doctor Who” since I was a tiny kid, you’re aware of how much it means because you’re aware of how much it meant to you. My now father-in-law [who portrayed Doctor Who in the 80s] is someone I used to draw in comic strips when I was a kid. That’s quite peculiar! It’s a difficult balance because on one end, you have to protect your own space, and there aren’t really any lessons in that. That does take a bit of trial and error, to an extent, and it’s something that you’re sometimes having to do quite publicly. But, it is an honor and a privilege, without a doubt. As you’ve said, it means so much to people and you want to be worthy of that. You have to acknowledge that and be careful with it. Some days that’s tough, if you’re not in the mood.

I know you’re returning to the stage later this year to portray Macbeth. You’ve previously voiced the role for BBC Sounds, but how are you feeling about taking on the character in the theater?

I’m really excited about it. It’s been a while since I’ve done Shakespeare. It’s very thrilling but equally — and this analogy probably doesn’t stretch — it’s like when someone prepares for an Olympic event. It does feel like a bit of a mountain and, yeah, you’re daring to set yourself up against some fairly worthy competition from down the years. That’s both the challenge and the horror of doing these types of things. We’ve got a great director, Max Webster, who recently did “Life of Pi.” He’s full of big ideas. It’s going to be exciting, thrilling, and a little bit scary. I’m just going to take a deep breath.

Before we part ways, let’s discuss the future of “Good Omens.” Gaiman has said that he already has ideas for Season 3, should it happen. If you were to do another season, is there anyone in particular you’d love to work with next time around or anything specific you’d like to see happen for Crowley?

Oh, Neil Gaiman knows exactly where he wants to take it. If you’re working with people like Gaiman, I wouldn’t try to tamper with that creative void. Were he to ask my opinion, that would be a different thing, but I can’t imagine he would. He’s known these characters longer than me and what’s interesting is what he does with them. That’s the bit that I’m desperate to know. I do know where Crowley might end up next, but it would be very wrong if I told you.

[At this point, Tennant picks up a pencil and starts writing on a hotel pad of paper.]

I thought you were going to write it down for me then. Perhaps like a clandestine meeting on a bench in St James’ Park, but instead you’d write the information down and slide it across the table…

I should have done! I was drawing a line, which obviously, psychologically, I was thinking, “Say no more. You’re too tempted to reveal a secret!” It was my subconscious going “Shut the fuck up!”

[tarotwithavi]

A letter from your future self

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

How to choose a pile?

Close your eyes and take a deep breath and ask the angels to show you the right pile for you and open your eyes. The first pile that catches your attention is the right pile for you.

This is a general reading so only take what resonates and leave the rest.

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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT 🫶🏻💞

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

Pile 1

Dear past me,

This is me sending you a big hug through this letter. It feels like you’re always pushing, always defending what you believe in. It’s been tough, I know. But I want you to remember something important: this struggle is shaping you into someone strong and unshakeable. Each time you stand your ground, you are becoming more of who you are meant to be.

There is a quiet power within you that often gets overlooked, even by you. It’s that deep, inner knowing ,your intuition that whispers truths only you can hear. Trust it. Trust yourself. You don’t always need to shout to be powerful; sometimes, the most potent strength comes from within, from a place of stillness and certainty. Let that inner voice guide you, even when things seem uncertain or confusing.

And speaking of confusion, I know there are moments when everything feels like a blur, like you’re lost in a fog and can’t see the path ahead. Those moments are scary, but they are also where your deepest wisdom lies. Don’t fear the unknown. Dive into it. Embrace it. This journey isn’t just about reaching a destination; it’s about discovering who you are when the light is dim, and the road is unclear.

I want you to know that your fire is what makes you unique. Your passion, your creativity, and your ability to lead with courage even when you’re scared, that's your gift to the world. You don’t need to hide your light or dim it for anyone. Keep that flame burning bright, because it will guide you through the darkest nights.

Remember, I’m already here, living the life you’re dreaming of. I’ve faced the fears, the battles, and the doubts, and I’ve come out the other side stronger and more certain of who I am. And you will, too. Trust in the journey, trust in yourself, and know that you are exactly where you need to be right now. Keep going. The future is waiting, and it’s more beautiful than you can imagine.

With love and faith,

Your Future Self

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

Pile 2

Dear troubled me,

I see you there, carrying so much on your shoulders, wondering if it's all going to be worth it. You've put in the work, tried so hard to make things right, and yet sometimes it feels like you're stuck in the same place, like nothing is changing. I know you're tired. I know you're feeling the weight of all the choices you've made and the dreams that haven’t turned out the way you’d hoped. But I promise you every step you’ve taken, every seed you’ve planted, is leading you somewhere important. Even when you can’t see it yet.

I know you’ve been overwhelmed. It feels like you’re doing everything alone, like no one really understands the pressure you're under. You’ve been carrying responsibilities that aren’t always yours to bear, trying to hold everything together, and sometimes, it just feels like too much. And it’s okay to admit that. It’s okay to feel like you need a break. You don’t have to do everything perfectly. You’re allowed to put down what isn’t yours and take care of yourself first.

You’ve also faced those moments of disappointment the kind that stays with you, that makes you question your choices and what you’ve lost along the way. I know it’s hard to see past what didn’t work out, to not let it define you. But what I want you to remember is that these moments are not the end of your story. They are a part of your journey, a testament to your courage to keep moving, to keep feeling, to keep believing in something more.

There will be nights when you feel like you can’t escape your thoughts, when the fears and worries seem to have no end. You are stronger than those thoughts. You are more than your darkest moments. You have the ability to change your narrative, to find your way back to peace. I know it feels heavy right now, but you have it within you to rise above it.

There is a new path waiting for you. A chance to step into something different, something that lights you up in ways you never thought possible. A fresh start where you’re no longer bound by what’s held you back, where you trust yourself enough to take that leap into the unknown. Your spirit is ready for this, even if it doesn’t feel like it yet. Trust in the adventure that’s unfolding for you. Believe in the magic of new beginnings, and know that the future you’ve been dreaming of is closer than you think.

With all the love and faith in your strength,

Your Future Self

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

Pile 3

Dear Me,

I am writing to you from a time when things are clearer and lighter. I know right now, life feels like a series of choices and uncertainties. You’re standing at a crossroads, unsure of which path to take. But I want to remind you of something very important: trust yourself. You have a pure heart and a courageous spirit, and that's all you need to move forward.

Life is bringing you a connection that is deep and meaningful. Embrace it fully, without fear. It might not look like what you expect or come at the most convenient time, but it will fill your heart in ways you can’t imagine. This is your time to take a leap, to jump into new experiences without overthinking, without doubting. This journey might feel risky, but it will lead you to places where your soul feels alive.

Along the way, you’ll meet someone or maybe a part of yourself who is passionate, romantic, and perhaps a bit of a dreamer. They (or you) will inspire you to see the beauty in the small things again. Follow these feelings; they are your compass. But remember, not everything will be perfect. There will be moments of conflict and struggle. Sometimes, it will feel like people are challenging you or taking advantage of you. There will be a sense of loss or tension, like you've been fighting battles that wear you down.

But through these struggles, you’ll discover something powerful within yourself. You’ll learn what is truly worth fighting for and what isn’t. You'll grow wiser, stronger, and more determined. You'll start to see yourself in a new light a light that burns bright with confidence, creativity, and fire. You’ll become the person who knows her worth and doesn’t settle for less.

In the end, you’ll find a place of peace and abundance. A place where you’re comfortable in your own skin, where you feel secure and proud of what you’ve built for yourself. You’ll be surrounded by the things you love and the people who cherish you. This is the life waiting for you , a life that feels rich not just in material things but in spirit and joy.

So, dear me, be brave. Be bold. Trust the path, even when it twists and turns. Know that everything is leading you to a future where you stand strong, radiant, and fulfilled.

With love,

Your Future Self

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

[loveemagicpeace]

North node- your path🌊

The sign in which the North Node falls denotes the psychological shift that needs to occur within the personality. The house containing the North Node shows the experiences that allow the person to access this new psychological awareness. In my experience, the house is at least of equal importance to the sign. The house position indicates the arena in which the life lessons of the North Node are learned. For ex:, if your North Node is in Cancer in the 11th House, you are learning to get in touch with and communicate your feelings, through cultivating the energy of friendships and learning to "go with the flow".if your North Node is in Aries in the 4th House, through getting in touch with your gut instincts (4th House) you can discover and communicate who you are (Aries.) . If the sign of your North Node is in the same sign as the house containing your North Node it simply means double the intensity of the same life lesson. If your North Node is in a house opposing the sign of your North Node it will be necessary for you to carefully and continuously check with yourself to find the right blending of behavior.

North Node in 1st house/Aries North Node-in this life you are focused on yourself, how you see yourself, personality. To learn how to be with yourself and love yourself. Accept yourself as you are. Being independent from others and believing in yourself. Being kind to yourself and not looking at others. You have the ability to see the difficult sides of others, but also their loving sides. You don't like to be with people when your dark side shows and you prefer to withdraw because you feel guilty. But then you can see yourself in a different light, and that's actually a good thing. You have to find someone who will accept it and not push you aside. When you make decisions, you can feel that it is the right decision and you must not make a decision impulsively, because that way you can make the wrong decision. You have to be aware of yourself and who you are, and when you are more in touch with your energy, then you will feel the real you. You need a partner with whom you can grow and become a better version of yourself, and thereby also get to know yourself.

North Node in 2nd house/Taurus North Node-your focus is to find value in yourself and not through money. Many people with this position see their worth or power only when they have money and think that makes them worth more. You can learn to find value in the things that make you happy and bring you peace. To enjoy life without including money in it. To find pleasure in food, good drink, movies, good company and being in your own comfort. To find trust in others and in yourself. To take things slowly and be patient. To live knowing that they live for themselves and not for others. You can be too vulnerable to the opinion of other people. You define your self-worth based on them. You could easily get help, and you attracted things to you naturally. The north node in second house suggests that in the past, you used sexuality as a means to get what you want. With this placement, you often possess a lot of sexual power. You are very charismatic, and other people are drawn to you. There were periods in your life when you were on the verge of collapse, where you had to completely recreate yourself, and come back and rise like phoenix.

North Node in 3rd house/ Gemini North Node- your focus is on communication, relatives, interaction, intelligence and learning. It is important that you are not focused on your truth but on the people around you. To listen to other people and understand their sides. That it's okay to ask if you don't understand something and that the question will never sound weird or crazy. You can learn to be okay with silence and connect with people through it. Sometimes silence speaks louder than words. It is also important that you choose one path, because the problem with this north node is that many times you are torn between two things. One path may be quite different from the other, but you can choose the path that suits you best. These people are learning to accept duality. Planet earth runs on the principles of yin and yang, night and day, cold and hot, female and male- seeing opposites that make a whole. U will better understand people when u will see filp side of the coin.

North Node in 4th house/Cancer North Node-in this life you are focused on home, family, comfort, people you know and who give you a sense of recognition. You have to learn to be with others and be connected to your family (which can be difficult) but this is also your purpose - maybe a better connection with your mother and to understand her better and build a better relationship with her. To support others in things and to feel accepted. You can sacrifice a lot for others and to make others feel better around you. You want the person next to you to feel safe. You have to also learn that you don't need to achieve everything right away and that it takes time and that no one is more successful than you. When it comes to relationships, you can learn not to control things but to let them go if your partner doesn't feel good enough in the relationship. They have the need to do everything just to keep their partner because they think that if they fulfill their needs then they will have a nice relationship, but this is not entirely true. First, they can fulfill their own needs.

North Node in 5th house/Leo North Node-in this life your focus is on children, hobbies, fun, inner child, romance.Many problems with taking responsibility have to do with trust. Leo North Node people violate other people's trust without intending to or recognizing when they have done it. This is why other people sometimes react violently against them. If these folks can see the child in other people, they will recognize that everyone operates from a certain level of trust that others are going to keep their word. You can learn to find your own fun and hobby that makes you happy and fulfilling. Above all, you can find your inner child and connect with this part of your life. Spending more time with people who are younger than you or children. You can proudly show your childish side and talents. Share your knowledge with others and don't be afraid to step in front of others and show yourself to the world. You could have had a more difficult childhood that was unusual and because of that you now want to find your childhood joy that you couldn't find before. You have to recognize your power and follow your ego. You are wonderful with children and children are “good karma” for you. It is important in relationships that both things are involved giving and receiving.

North Node in 6th house/Virgo North Node-in this life you have to find balance with your body and your job. You have to work in a job in which you feel that it is healthy for you, because the job can also cause you to get sick. You can find a routine that will suit you and in which you will find yourself. The connection with your body is important here. You must not doubt your abilities and be self-critical. You have to learn to find your perfection, which is in some ways imperfect. You are here to heal others and help them on their journey. You are often more aware of the pain of others than they are themselves. You can heal many people. You can also become a mentor to others. When it comes to love, you can't idealize others too much and you can let other people close and not look for an ideal partner. You have a lot of empathy for others and you listen to others without judging them and you like to help solve their problems. Sometimes you can also put off a lot of things. Like, say, time to pay a phone bill or an obligation. You often avoid this. You can be very messy at the times.

North Node in 7th house/Libra North Node-in this life, your focus is a partnership that will make you and the people around you happy. You can see two sides well and know how to overestimate a problem and solve problems in relationships. Finding a partner who will really suit you is difficult for you, because you may want someone who will match the image you have in your head. You might need a lot of confirmation from others that you are good enough and you want a lot of love from others. But here it is important that you find love within yourself and not from others. That you learn to receive love from your partner and that this is enough for you. To let go of the fear of disappointment and loss. Some of these folks are afraid to love anyone because they aren't accustomed to exchanging love. In this life, their early attempts may fail because they haven't learned how to exchange love. They close themselves off emotionally in response. However, they are learning that some people will love them for their innate individual spirit, and some will not. People are differ-ent, after all. You attract partners that are karmic.

North Node in 8th house/Scorpio North Node-in this life you want stability, depth and trust. You feel a lot of other people's energy and can have a lot of past lives. These people have such good and simple hearts. They must also accept and trust the help of others. You are a very mystical person who can quickly identify the energy of others. You like to build something worthwhile. You also have a special gift when you build things (relationship, business, etc.) you can build things so that they will last consciously. You want power and you want your money. You like things to be yours only, this is true in all things in life. That's why you don't like to build a relationship with someone if that person is not completely yours. It is also necessary to remove things that do not serve you from your life because you can stay in the old circle. When you decide to change - you win and when you decide to do things the old way you lose. It is very important to connect with your spiritual side because that will fulfill you and to look for people who are similar to you in these aspects. Find people who are deeper and more spiritual. Surrender more to the universe and trust that magical things will happen. These people are destined to experience a total bonding with another person. And this is also what they are looking for the most. These people are also destined to meet many soulmates.

North Node in 9th house/Sagittarius North Node-in this life you are looking for your belief and your truth. The more you travel and discover new things, the more you will learn about yourself and your journey here. You can find people with whom you can be exactly as you are and they will accept you as such. You have a gift for understanding others. Many times you can find yourself between two decisions such as "knowing" and "feeling", but your intuition will always be right, so rely on it. You can follow your path and trust that you are where you are, exactly where you can be. You can let go of things that hinder you and rely on others. You can find some peace within yourself and trust that this is just a journey you're on and it's fun and you always learn something new. To live in the moment and forget everything that hinders you and all the thoughts you have. Being more spontaneous and making decisions impulsively.

North Node in 10th house/Capricorn North Node-in this life you have learn to be yourself and find your own light that doesn't involve your family. Family can often be the reason why you don't do what makes you happy or why you don't follow your path. Many times you can feel that they are controlling you and your life. You can have problems with rejection in all aspects and you can learn that in life we ​​don't always win, but even losing can bring a lot. When you get over that fear, good things will come. You learn to be responsible for yourself and find out how to become independent and independent from others. This will also bring you great growth. Adulthood and maturity are also part of it. You can be a very good boss and you can also have good leadership skills. You want to gain the respect of others. You can boldly pursue your goals and believe that they will succeed. Above all, you can let go of your emotional attachment to your parents and you must not let them control you. Connect more with your emotions and needs. You want someone who will make you feel seen. You need a partner who will give you a sense of protection, strength, determination and will support you. When you find your goal and follow it, then you will also attract the right partner.

North Node in 11th house/Aquarius North Node-in this life you have to find your interests, friends, group and what you want in yourself. To belong to oneself and not to society. You have to let go and do things without expecting anything from them. You like to take risks, but when you lose, it brings you great disappointment. You must learn to lose in any area of ​​life, even if it's just a game. You must learn to control your ego and see things from a different perspective. You have to also look at the needs of others, which can sometimes be insufficient. You are meant to shine and take the stage, but with the right intentions. You have to learn that not everyone will love you and that not everyone will see you and give you the feeling that something you do is approved by them. You have the extraordinary gift of being able to build deep and unique friendships. And you can attract many people who will change your life. You tend to attract very unique people and idiosyncrasies. Being a child or teenager will bring you great joy. You must trust the flow of life and trust that it will bring you the best.

North Node in 12th house/Pisces North Node-you have to find your inner self in this life. Connecting to yourself and not looking for perfection. You can live in an imperfect world and do things with your soul and not your head. That way you will best achieve what you want. You have a lot of past life connections and can be very intuitive. You can become more aware of your existence and be okay with it. You like to plan things and you like to be in order. You can be critical of others and yourself, which is one of the things you can give up. It's good to make mistakes and to let yourself make them. You must realize that we are all only human and that this is normal. You can have an obsession with being able to analyze everything and get an answer as to why something is the way it is. You must embrace change and allow yourself to become more like a fish and just go with the flow of life. When things go wrong, you can get nervous and want to control things so that they go in the right direction, but in reality, you have to just let go and let go. In relationships, you have to let go of your emotions and let yourself be vulnerable. Facing the unknown and being okay with it. It is good to meditate and do yoga, this way you will connect better with yourself.

🎸For personal readings u can sign up here: https://snipfeed.co/bekylibra 🎸

-Rebekah🦋🧚🏼‍♀️🌊

[deliciousangelfestival]

Heartfelt Chase - Bucky

Character: agent!Bucky x female!agent

Summary: She tries to find an agent she secretly admires who went missing.

A/N: This story is inspired by the GIF. Lol. 😂

Also, it’s a fun break from the angsty political Bucky.

Main Masterlist || If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee on Ko-fi 🙏🏻

You work as a data analyst at the spy agency. The only reason you’re here is because of your father. You’ve always dreamed of being a field agent like him, especially since his top pupil is none other than Bucky.

You've admired Bucky for years—secretly watching his missions from your screen, hanging onto every move he made.

You've volunteered for every one of his missions, offering to be a bystander, even joking about pretending to be a tree. But the boss always shut you down.

And every time you asked Bucky directly, he’d just say, “It eases my mind if you stay here.”

One day, everything changed. The agency lost contact with Bucky during a mission. You immediately volunteered to go after him, but the boss looked terrified and said, “No. He’s going to kill me.”

You had no idea what that meant, but when nobody made a move, you took matters into your own hands.

You tracked down his last known location and discovered the missing piece: Bucky was tailing an arms dealer who had a bioweapon.

“Damn it!” you cursed under your breath. This wasn’t supposed to be you stumbling upon a hidden bioweapon. And to make matters worse, you had no backup. You were quickly captured.

Thrown into the back of a car, you were bombarded with questions. Your head spun, but you stuck to your story. “I don’t know anything. I’m just here to find my friend.”

The guy questioning you chuckled, clearly not buying it. “Searching for a friend and finding a nuclear bomb? Quite the coincidence.”

You shrugged nonchalantly. “Where are we going, anyway?” You glanced at the empty road stretching out ahead of you.

“Torture room,” he said casually.

“Fantastic,” you muttered. The whole situation was spiraling out of control, and in this moment of panic, the only person you could think about was Bucky. But where was he?

Suddenly, a loud boom echoed behind you. The car jerked, the windows rattling from the explosion.

“What the hell?” your captor yelled, glancing back.

Then you heard it—the unmistakable sound of a motorcycle engine roaring toward the car. You craned your neck to look out the window, heart racing, and there he was. Bucky.

You couldn’t believe it. “Bucky!”

Still driving, Bucky shot you a quick glance, irritation flickering across his face. “Didn’t I tell you to stay?”

“If you’d sent a message, I wouldn’t be here worrying about you!” you shot back.

Bucky sighed like this was the last thing he needed. He pulled out a weapon and aimed it under the car. “Put on your seatbelt!”

Without hesitation, you braced yourself. In seconds, the car flipped into the air, crashing back down with a heavy thud. The world spun again, and everything went silent.

Moments later, Bucky pulled up beside the wreck, dismounted his bike, and yanked the door open.

“You okay?” he asked, his voice gruff but laced with concern. His eyes betrayed more than he let on.

You groaned, unbuckling yourself. “Define ‘okay.’”

Bucky shook his head, clearly holding back a sigh. “This is exactly why I don’t want you in the field.”

You glared at him, hands on your hips. “I’m perfectly capable, Bucky! I tracked you down, didn’t I?”

He crossed his arms, staring down at you, his usual calm exterior barely hiding the concern underneath. “Yeah, and look what happened. You almost got killed.”

You threw your hands up. “You could’ve been killed too! That’s why I came—no one else was going to look for you!”

His expression softened for a brief second before he glanced away. “I can take care of myself.”

“And I can’t?” You shot back, taking a step toward him.

He paused, looking like he wanted to say something but hesitated. Finally, after a long silence, he muttered, “It’s not about what you can do. It’s about what I can’t handle.”

You blinked, caught off guard by his words. “What do you mean?”

He clenched his jaw, still avoiding your gaze. “I can’t handle the idea of you getting hurt."

Your breath caught in your throat. The gruff, distant Bucky was showing a side of him you hadn’t expected. For a moment, you couldn’t find the words.

“You... care about me?” you asked softly.

You stood there, heart pounding, completely at a loss for how to respond. But before you could say anything, Bucky turned back toward his bike, his usual stoic mask slipping back into place.

“Let’s get out of here before more trouble shows up,” he said, swinging his leg over the motorcycle.

Still stunned, you climbed onto the back of the bike, wrapping your arms around him. As the engine roared to life, you couldn’t help but smile, knowing that maybe—just maybe—this mission was worth all the danger.

Taglist: @thezombieprostitute, @scott-loki-barnes , @missvelvetsstuff , @mostlymarvelgirl , @kjah97 , @pattiemac1

[mydearestbeloved]

#0.2 [Chapter]

CW: Implied Yandere, Angst

⚠️SPOILER ALERT to my "Trial Player"-AU (Imagine 1#).

Note:

I have too many ideas but too little time, so I'll just post them as drafts here until I have the time to edit them thoroughly.

_____

Draft I:

As you sat alone in a rare moment of peace, your thoughts wandered, weighed down by the inevitable future. You watched Jinwoo across the room, his back turned as he spoke quietly with a few of his shadows, too preoccupied to notice the turmoil churning inside you. You wondered if he could sense it—the quiet resignation you’d tried so hard to bury beneath the surface.

For a long time, you had wondered which of the tropes would define Sung Jinwoo. The question had plagued your mind ever since you were brought into this world, even before you officially met him. Back then, you had always believed he was the type to sacrifice himself for the world. After all, in the original story, he had gone back in time, facing the Monarchs alone. He shouldered the burden, unflinching, and in doing so, sealed his fate. It was the path of a man who believed no one else could bear the weight of the world.

And you? You always saw yourself as someone who would burn the world for the ones you loved. Before getting isekai’d, that had been your mindset—I’ll burn the world for you. If you had someone like Jinwoo, someone precious, you’d scorch the earth before letting them be taken.

But now, everything had changed. You weren’t just a bystander. You were a part of his story, no matter how much you had tried not to meddle. You were in too deep, and every day you spent by his side made it harder to imagine a future where you weren’t there. But you knew what was coming. Jinwoo’s path would lead him to turn back time, and when that happened—when he used the Cup of Reincarnation to stop the Monarchs—you would be erased.

The system’s melancholic silence when you’d asked it about your fate had only confirmed your worst fears. There was no need for a trial player when the world was safe from the Monarchs. You would disappear from this reality, perhaps return to your own. Or maybe you would simply cease to exist.

You had already accepted it, in a way. If Jinwoo chose the world over himself, then I would choose to sacrifice myself for him. You would give him the chance to live in the world he chose to protect. You would disappear quietly, like a glitch in the system, repaired and erased without a trace.

But he must never know.

If Jinwoo knew... if he found out what you planned to do, it could change everything. You weren’t blind to how it might affect him. He had changed from the man you once read about. This Jinwoo was not the same as the one in the original story. He was growing more possessive, more attached to you. It was subtle at first—the way he watched you avoid the spotlight, how he seemed to enjoy it when you recoiled from fame—but now, it was undeniable. He wanted you by his side, always. His actions, his words, even his touch—everything told you that he wouldn’t let you go easily.

And if he knew your fate? If he discovered that by turning back time and saving the world, he would lose you... What would he do?

Your heart clenched at the thought. He might choose you over the world. He might become the man who would burn everything to keep you by his side. And that scared you more than anything.

Jinwoo was always kind. That was a fact you couldn’t deny. Even with his immense power, even with his ruthlessness on the battlefield, there was a kindness in him that remained untouched. You didn’t want to take that from him. You didn’t want to become the reason he veered off his path, the reason he sacrificed the world for something as selfish as... a love for the you who weren't meant to be.

So, he must not know.

You would carry the weight of your secret, and when the time came, you would disappear. You would become nothing more than a fading memory, like a glitch once fixed, leaving no trace behind.

You looked at Jinwoo again, your heart heavy with the knowledge that you were running out of time. His gaze met yours, and for a moment, his expression softened, as if sensing the depth of your thoughts. He crossed the room, sitting beside you with a quiet, almost casual presence that belied the intensity of his emotions. His hand brushed yours, and you felt the familiar warmth of his touch.

“You’re thinking too much again,” he said softly, his voice low and comforting.

You forced a smile, trying to mask the storm inside you. “Maybe.”

Jinwoo didn’t press further, but his eyes lingered on your face, searching. He always knew when something was off, but for now, he seemed willing to let it slide. You leaned into his side, resting your head against his shoulder, wondering how long you had left before everything changed.

Because no matter how much you tried to keep your cards close, the end was inevitable. And when it came... you would disappear, leaving Jinwoo to walk the path alone once again.

_____

Draft II:

You stared out the window, your thoughts swirling in a labyrinth of uncertainty. The room was quiet, save for the faint hum of life outside, but inside, your mind was far too loud. The weight of everything—your existence here, Jinwoo’s fate, the inevitable outcome of this world—all pressed down on you like a suffocating blanket. You thought about Jinwoo, about his burdens, his strength, and the path he was destined to walk.

He must not know.

That thought repeated itself like a mantra in your head. If Jinwoo knew what you were willing to do, if he knew you were planning to sacrifice yourself for him, everything could change. And that change could unravel the story you knew—the story you had come to love, the one you were never meant to alter.

In the original story, Jinwoo was the kind of man who would sacrifice himself for the world, or for his loved ones. You had always admired that about him—the quiet strength, the resolve to protect even if it meant carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. But now, as you sat here in his world, things had shifted. You were in too deep. And if things continued down this path, it would be you who would disappear once Jinwoo reversed time to stop the Monarchs.

You had asked the system once, in private, what would happen to you after Jinwoo used the Cup of Reincarnation. Its silence had told you everything. You would cease to exist. You wouldn’t be needed anymore because the trial—the system—would be over. You would either return to your world or vanish entirely, leaving no trace. And Jinwoo... Jinwoo would never remember you. Once the timeline reset, his memories of you would be erased, as though you were nothing more than a glitch.

Perhaps that was for the best.

You didn’t mind sacrificing yourself for him. If you disappeared, at least you would know you had done something meaningful. Jinwoo would live on, and he wouldn’t be burdened by your memory. He would believe, as always, that he had faced it all alone.

But the thought of how your disappearance might affect him—it gnawed at you. Jinwoo had already lost so much. What would he feel if he knew you were gone, even if he couldn’t remember why? How would it change him if he somehow, deep down, sensed the absence of something—someone—important?

Where you 'important' enough?

“You’re thinking too much again,” came Jinwoo’s voice, low and smooth, as if he had been reading your mind. He was suddenly beside you, his presence steady and overwhelming, as it always was.

You blinked, pulled from your thoughts, and turned to face him. He looked at you with those deep, intense eyes that seemed to see right through you, his gaze unwavering as if he could sense your inner turmoil. He stepped closer, his thumb brushed your cheek, his touch grounding you. “You’re always overthinking.”

You laughed softly, a sound tinged with both amusement and sadness. “I can’t help it. It’s in my nature.”

He leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Then let me help you. You don’t have to carry everything alone.”

The irony of his words wasn’t lost on you. He, who had always been alone, who had carried the weight of the world by himself, was now offering to share your burden. It was almost poetic.

You nodded, leaning into his touch. “I’m fine, Jinwoo.”

He raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. “You’ve been distant lately.” His thumb continue to brush against your skin, sending a wave of warmth through you. “What are you thinking about?”

You. That was the truth, wasn’t it? You were always thinking about him, about the burden he carried, and what it meant for both of you. But you couldn’t tell him that. You couldn’t tell him you were planning to disappear, or that you were ready to sacrifice yourself for him. He’d never let you.

So instead, you asked, “What would you sacrifice for the world, Jinwoo? Or for someone you care about?”

His eyes narrowed slightly, as if he was trying to understand where the question was coming from. He was silent for a moment, considering his answer. “I’d sacrifice myself if it meant saving the people I love,” he said finally. “I’d protect them at any cost.”

Of course he would. That was the Jinwoo you knew. The Jinwoo the world knew.

Please, never change.

But what about you? Would he ever put you in that equation, or were you just another person in the background—someone to protect from afar, someone he couldn’t afford to get too close to?

“What about me?” you asked softly, your voice barely above a whisper.

Jinwoo’s gaze darkened, and for a moment, you saw something flash in his eyes. Something possessive. Something that made your heart race. He stepped even closer, his hand now cradling your face, his thumb tracing the line of your jaw.

“I’d burn the world for you,” he said, his voice low and dangerous. “Don’t you know that by now?”

Your breath hitched at the intensity in his words. There was no hesitation, no doubt in his voice. He meant it. He would destroy everything if it meant keeping you by his side. And that terrified you.

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go.

You had always thought Jinwoo was the kind of person who would sacrifice himself for the world, and maybe he still was—but when it came to you, something had changed. His focus had shifted. You weren’t just someone he protected. You were his. And he wasn’t going to let you go.

You tried to keep your voice steady as you said, “You can’t—”

“I can,” he interrupted, his tone leaving no room for argument. “And I will.”

Your heart pounded in your chest, a mix of fear and something else—something you didn’t want to name. “Jinwoo...”

He leaned closer, his forehead resting gently against yours. “You’re mine, (Name). And I won’t let you go. Not for the world, not for anyone. I’ll keep you by my side, no matter what.”

The weight of his words settled over you like a heavy cloak. You had always known he was possessive, but this... this was something else. It was dangerous, all-consuming. And the worst part? You weren’t sure if you wanted to resist it anymore.

But even so, you couldn’t tell him. You couldn’t tell him about the future you knew, about the Cup of Reincarnation, about your eventual disappearance. Because if you did, you knew he would do everything in his power to stop it—even if it meant burning the world to the ground.

So, instead, you leaned into him, letting his warmth envelop you, even as your heart ached with the knowledge of what was to come.

“I won’t let you face it alone,” you whispered, more to yourself than to him.

And for now, that was enough.

End Note:

It's popular to say, get yourself a partner who'll burn the world for you.

I still love that trope the most, but I also want to try new flavors without forgetting the others I've tasted. So, I improvised, and this is how my "Sung Jinwoo/Trial Player!Reader"-fanfic Imagine came to be.

In a nutshell: Jinwoo is intense, but (Name) is also intense in her own way~

[sethsclearwater]

synopsis: reader realizes she has an affinity for being dominated and goes to embry for help exploring her newfound desires

warnings: smut, talks of kink, dom!embry, sub!reader

word count: 4.81k

…

by the time you’d hit your third breakup in less than a year with guys who were shockingly inept at satisfying you in bed, you’d decided to hit the books and do some research on how exactly to define what you were looking for. it didn’t take long to discover you were looking for a pretty established (and, in your opinion, mildly taboo) dom/sub relationship but your research left you with little information on how exactly to find someone who would be able to feed your desires. 

it was around then that embry had come to mind. the two of you had become friends shortly after you’d moved to forks and you’d vaguely remembered him bringing up the topic around your mutual friends a few times. for reasons unbeknownst to you, he wasn’t in any type of long term relationship and you could only recall a few times here and there where he’d mentioned one off things with some other girls. 

you weren’t ugly by any means and embry had let you know just how attractive he’d found you on more than one occasion so, after mulling it over in your head for a few days, you’d decided to just be upfront with him and ask him to introduce you to the world of bdsm. 

to your surprise, embry’s expression remained the same when he heard your request, his posture remaining relaxed as he leaned back into the kitchen chair in his apartment. the only indication he was even remotely affected by your proposition was the subtle tensing of his hand around the glass of water he couldn’t seem to let go of, “you want me,” he emphasized before continuing, “to be your dom?” he asked, brown eyes watching you carefully as you blushed, suddenly feeling much more insecure about your proposition as you saw the way he was looking at you. 

he didn’t seem too interested in letting you break your gaze from his, following your’s as you subconsciously shrunk back into yourself, your arms wrapping around your waist, “i think so,” you murmured, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth as you anxiously waited for his response to your proposition. 

embry didn’t let you fear for long, quickly responding, “i can do that.”

your gaze lifted up, your entire demeanor relaxing when you processed the shock of him actually agreeing to your idea, “come here,” his voice softened as he straightened up, pulling out the chair next to him so you could sit down and be slower to him. 

when you hesitated, embry took your hand into his, gently squeezing it before he was tugging you over to sit down next to him, “so can you tell me what you think you’re looking for? i think we should make sure we’re on the same page before jumping into this, yea?” he suggested as you sat down, continuing to hold your hand in his. 

you quickly nodded, still feeling a bit flustered over the whole idea of verbalizing exactly what you were looking for but you knew the importance of the initial communication and appreciated him leading the way for the conversation, “of course,” you whispered, pausing as you thought about how to explain this to him. 

embry gave your hand another squeeze, allowing you another moment to think about it before he decided to jump in and save you, “how about i tell you what i can do and you tell me if that’s the same or different from what you’re looking for, okay?” he asked and the exhale of relief that you let out after let him know all he needed to know before you even vocalized your response. 

“that sounds helpful,” you responded, voice still meek but you held his gaze as he offered you a reassuring smile. despite your nervousness, he seemed quite comfortable with the whole thing which was currently the only thing keeping you from backing out of it and locking yourself away forever in humiliation.

embry smiled, “so i’m imagining that you’re looking for someone who can take control in the bedroom and make you feel good while they’re doing it, yea?” he asked, waiting for you to give him a small nod before he continued, “i need someone who can trust me - completely. i’ll probably want to try some things with you that you haven’t done before and i’ll expect you to try it. obviously i’ll walk you through it and you’ll have your safe words but i don’t plan on pushing you far enough that you’ll need to use them, okay?” you gulped, slowly nodding as you took in his words. despite your nervousness around everything he was saying, some deep part of your brain was screaming at you to take advantage of the once in a lifetime opportunity in front of you. 

embry seemed pleased with your nod, turning to face you better so he could slide his free hand over your upper thigh, gently squeezing to show his approval, “you’ll be mine - in and out of the bedroom. i don’t plan on doing this just when i’m fucking you. you’re mine, okay?” his gaze didn’t waver as he waited for your response. he wasn’t entirely sure whether or not he could provide you what you were looking for but he’d be damned if he didn’t try. 

you sucked in a deep breath as you thought about his proposition, taking a moment to mull it over in your head before you slowly nodded, “i think that’s what i want,” your voice came out as a whisper as you responded to him and embry smiled, beyond pleased that you were interested in this and that you came to him first. 

“good. now can you tell me what you want your safe word to be? it can be whatever you want but you should make it something you can easily remember, okay? i don’t think you’ll need to use it but i want you to have one in case you ever need it.” he explained, his demeanor lightening up a bit as he processed that you two were definitely (finally) going to be doing this. 

your shoulders dropped as you also relaxed, leaning back into the chair as you thought for a moment, “can it just be red or something like that?” you asked, cheeks remaining a flaming pink as you also realized what you were going to be doing with him shortly. 

embry hummed and nodded, “that’s perfect,” he reassured, giving your thigh another squeeze, “do you know what you need from your apartment?” he asked and you frowned, eyebrows creasing together in confusion as you worked to figure out what exactly he was getting at.

“you’re spending the night, pretty thing,” he explained, letting out a breathy laugh when your gaze fell to the floor as your cheeks somehow managed to turn an even deeper shade of pink as you realized he fully planned on jumping right into things and at his use of a new pet name for you, “i’ll drive you back so we can get what you need, yea?” he suggested, laughing again when you nodded and peeked up at him.

embry was quick to stand up, helping you up as well before he was escorting you over to the doorway so you could get your shoes on and make the short drive back over to your apartment. you weren’t entirely sure about how he managed to do it, but he somehow got you two to continue a light-hearted conversation the whole way to your apartment and back to his - helping melt away your anxiety about what was to come. by the time you two had packed a bag for you and gotten back to his place, you felt much more comfortable about the whole thing and even started to feel excited about it. 

a comfortable silence settled over the two of you as you kicked your shoes off and headed back into the kitchen while embry dropped your bag off in the living room, “we don’t have to do anything tonight if you don’t want to,” embry started as he came back into the kitchen, stepping over to where you were standing, leaned against the kitchen counter.

you nodded, “i think i want to,” you said, voice soft as he leaned against the counter opposite of you, a smile on his face as he watched you.

“why don’t we take a shower then, yea? promise i don’t bite,” he teased, laughing when he heard your quiet giggle at his comment. you rolled your eyes, a small smile on your face as he took your hand into his and led you over to the bathroom.

although you’d been over to his place plenty of times, this time was clearly different as it sank in that you’d be intimate with him. before your nerves could get the better of you, embry was turning the shower on and stepping back over to you so he could help you get undressed. 

his hands settled at your hips, fingers dancing under your shirt along your waist, “you let me know if i’m going too fast,” he murmured, waiting for you to nod before he was sliding his hands up your sides to get your shirt off. 

you sucked in a breath when he tossed the shirt to the side, watching as his slowly gaze trailed down your chest, “embry,” you murmured as his hands slid down to your jeans.

“let me take care of you,” despite the plea, his voice remained soft. you nodded, another soft sigh leaving your lips as he undid the button on your jeans, taking his time tugging them down your legs as he slowly sank down to his knees in front of you.

he helped you step out of your jeans, not appearing to be in any kind of rush as the steam from the shower began to cloud the bathroom, “so beautiful,” he murmured, sliding his hands back up your legs so his fingers could toy with the thin band of your panties.

before he took them down, he pressed his lips to the fatty flesh of your hip, leaving a trail of soft kisses along the tops of your thighs and hips, “i can’t wait to be inside you,” he whispered and your knees nearly went weak, you quickly leaned further back into the counter, almost entirely relying on your hands to support you as embry slowly tugged your panties down, exposing yourself to him for the first time. 

“such a good girl,” he murmured, hands sliding back down your legs to help you step out of your panties so he could toss them to the growing pile of your clothes. his hands were hot against your thighs as he slid them back up, slowly standing up to his full height again. as he worked at getting your bra off, you were suddenly aware of just how big he was compared to you. 

easily towering over you, everything about him just seemed so much more intimidating as he tossed your bra to the side, “stop thinking so much, pretty thing,” embry gently reprimanded, his hands coming settle over your breasts, massaging the mounds for a moment as he brought your attention back to him.

at his voice, you were torn out of your thoughts and brought your gaze up to meet his, “get in the shower, i’ll be right behind you,” he said, slowly releasing his grip on your breasts so he could spin you around and you could head into the shower.

despite your initial shock at his self-restraint, you complied and stepped into the shower, the hot water immediately coating your figure and relaxing your muscles. some part of your brain had clearly expected him to just bend you over and rail you but for whatever reason, him taking his time with you seemed to make it that much hotter as you suddenly became much more aware of the growing ache between your thighs. 

embry’s hands were sliding over your figure, momentarily startling you as you were pulled out of your thoughts, “easy,” embry murmured, “just me,” he reassured, sliding one hand up to gently pull your hair over one shoulder.

his lips met the sensitive skin of your neck and you went lax in his arms, leaning back into him while he suckled at different spots across your neck and shoulder, “sensitive thing,” he teased, voice quiet as he continued peppering your neck with kisses. 

you melted into him, allowing him to support you when your attention was drawn to the bulge pressing into your lower back, “embry,” you whispered, peeking over your shoulder to look up at him, worry covering your features once again as you processed just how big he felt despite not even having seen him yet. 

embry chuckled, “relax, pretty thing,” he mused, “i promise i’d take care of you, didn’t i?” he asked, both hands gripping your hips so his thumbs could gently massage the tense muscles of your lower back to encourage you to enjoy yourself.

you hummed and nodded, remembering your earlier agreement, shoulders dropping as you rested your cheek against his chest, “that’s my girl,” he praised, pressing his lips to your wet hair, one hand sliding down to part the sensitive folds between your legs, “you’re doing great, pretty thing,” he added, his other arm coming up to wrap around your ribs to support you in preparation for what he was about to do.

a gasp left your lips when his thumb rolled over your clit, the sensation sending bolts of pleasure up your spine as you went weak in his arms. embry’s lips curled into a smile against your hair as he supported you, the combination of the warm water and embry’s gentle touches sending your brain haywire as you tried to focus.

while his thumb worked into a slow rhythm against your clit, his pointer finger dipped lower to circle the little entrance he fully intended on burying his cock in later on, “there she is,” embry mused, dipping his pointer finger into your heat so he could begin the process of stretching you out as he explored your body.

you let out a low moan at the intrusion, eyes fluttering closed as you allowed him to support most of your weight with his free arm. embry muffled his chuckle against your wet hair, gently curling his pointer inside your walls as he continued to work wonders with his thumb against your clit.

your brain was working overtime to process everything and, before you could even begin to gain a bit of control back, he was adding a second finger to your velvet walls to scissor you apart for him, “taking my fingers so well,” he praised, a low chuckle leaving his lips when he felt your pussy fluttering around him at the praise. 

“embry please-” you managed to squeak out, hands wrapping around his forearm currently supporting you as you desperately tried to find some way to control yourself.

he just hummed, continuing to rub slow, tight little circles against your clit, “please what?” he asked, the patience in his voice coming in stark contrast to your desperate one.

a quiet whine left your lips when he pressed down a little harder on your clit, your legs going weak again in the wet shower as he continued to hold you up. the pleasure coursing through your body had you quickly realizing he was most definitely going to make you cum for the first time with a man, “wanna cum, please-” you whimpered, eyes filling with tears as you peaked over your shoulder to look up at him only to be met with his soft brown eyes.

“you wanna cum on my fingers?” he repeated back despite the fact that he was already more than aware of what he was doing to you and what you wanted - no - needed from him. 

you quickly nodded, “yes - embry please-” you begged, not interested in finding out what punishments from him looked like if you came before he let you. 

he seemed to ponder your request for a moment, appearing to enjoy dragging out your pleasure and desperation as his fingers continued pleasuring your most sensitive areas, “go ahead and cum then, pretty thing,” he decided after a few moments, though for you it felt like an eternity as you battled off the tsunami building inside your belly.

as the words left his lips, he rolled your clit between his fingers and you almost instantaneously came undone on him. he caught you as you collapsed back into him, continuing to slowly thrust his finger in and out of your throbbing pussy as your first orgasm of the night washed over you. 

it was a near out-of-body experience, the kaleidoscope of colors that exploded when you came had you questioning everything you thought you knew was possible about sex and, more importantly, why the fuck you didn’t get with embry sooner. 

embry murmured quiet praises to you as you rode your high, removing his thumb from your clit when he felt you tensing up the tiniest bit from the overstimulation of the sensitive little nub, “deep breaths pretty thing,” embry encouraged, dropping his head to pepper your neck and shoulder with gentle kisses as you regained your footing and slowly came back to earth. 

the warmth of the shower combined with embry’s body heat helping ease you back down as he slowly withdrew his fingers from your canal. he slowly helped spin you around so you were bare chest to chest with him for the first time, allowing you to lazily wrap your arms around his waist while he held you close.

he reached behind you to turn off the water so the two of you could get dried off, “c’mere,” he murmured, “i got you,” he reassured with a breathy laugh when he saw how you looked up at him, totally unsure of how he expected you to walk to the bedroom. 

he reached down to lift you up, wrapping one arm around your back while the other went under the bend of your legs. “might be a little cold,” he warned before he was sitting you down on the counter so he could get towels to dry both of you off.

despite his warning, you still let out a gasp when your thighs met the marble, “told you it was cold,” embry laughed and you let out a breathy laugh, blushing.

he quickly dried himself off before he got a new towel to wrap you up in. when you went to take it from him, he quietly ‘tutted’ before he got to work drying you off himself, seeming to take a great amount of pleasure in taking his time drying each drop of water off your skin.

you were content with letting him work, still relishing in your post-orgasmic haze as he finished up, “alright, you okay to go to the bedroom?” he asked as he tossed the towel into the hamper before he was coming to rest his hands on either side of your thighs.

you hummed and nodded, content with pretty much whatever he had planned at this point now that you knew just how good he could make you feel, “you’re awfully pretty when you cum, you know that?” he mused, laughing when you sucked in a playful breath, cheeks flaring up again. 

he pressed a quick kiss to the tip of your nose before he was parting your thighs so he could lift you up again. totally wrapping yourself around him, you allowed him to carry you the short walk to the bedroom. while he laid you down on the bed and helped you get situated, he asked, “you’re on the pill still, right?”

you hummed and nodded, “do you know if you want me to wear a condom?” he asked, sitting down on the bed next to you so he could rummage through the bedside drawer for lube and a condom.

you thought about it for a moment before responding, “you don’t have anything do you?” you asked and embry laughed, shaking his head.

“promise i don’t have anything but i can still wear one if you want,” he reassured, eyes softening as he waited for your response, clearly fine either way you decided.

you hummed and nodded, happy with his response, “don’t gotta wear one,” you decided and he nodded, leaning down to press a quick kiss to your lips.

when he sat back up, he pumped some lube into his hand before coating his length with it and, for the first time, you got a good look at him. your initial assumptions in the shower were correct and he was definitely much larger than expected and, although you’d had your fair share of men in the past, you were confident you hadn’t been with anyone who came close to competing with his size.

embry’s gentle touch against your hip pulled you out of your thoughts, “everything okay down there?” he asked, a small smile on his face despite the clear concern laced in his tone. 

you quickly nodded, gaze flickering between his cock and his face, not totally sure how to explain what was running through your head. fortunately for you, embry followed your gaze, quickly picking up what you were doing, “trust, yea?” he asked, reminding you of your earlier agreement and you let out a heavy exhale, nodding.

despite the fact that he was still building his trust with you, he hadn’t led you astray yet so you relaxed back into the bed, allowing your thighs to part so he could get between them, “such a good girl,” he praised as he got up, coming over to settle between your spread thighs. 

“i’ll go easy on you,” embry promised, looking down at you and you nodded, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him down for a kiss. although he figured you’d be a bit more apprehensive based on your reaction to seeing the size of him, he was more than happy with how much faith you had in him to make you feel good and he quickly melted into the kiss. 

knotting one hand in your hair, he used his other to grab his cock and line it up with your entrance. a gasp left your lips and he caught it, not breaking the kiss as he slowly pushed his hips into yours so the two of you could become one.

as your walls split around his cock, he tightened his fingers in your hair and you whined, legs wrapping around his waist to better open up for him, “fuck you feel amazing,” embry groaned against your lips, doing his damnedest to take his time pushing into you despite everything in his body begging him not to.

despite your worry about accommodating him, you quickly discovered just how delicious it felt to have him effortlessly pressing into the deepest parts of you, “embry please-” you groaned, tightening your legs and arms around him to try and pull him closer to you.

embry didn’t seem to have much of an issue resisting your strength, “such a brat,” he grumbled with a breathy laugh when he saw the way your cheeks immediately flared up to a bright pink at the comment, “please what, pretty thing? gotta use your words if you want something from me,” he reminded, clearly enjoying easing into his new role as your dom.

you paused for a moment as your anxiety ran through your system, still a bit flustered over using such graphic terms with him, “please fuck me,” your voice came out as a whisper though, you were a bit surprised that you managed to get it out in the first place thanks to your embarrassment about the whole thing.

“such a good girl,” embry praised, “just gotta ask, yea?” he teased, a cheeky smile covering his features when he felt your walls fluttering around his cock. 

“jus’ gotta ask,” your quiet voice repeated back and his eyes crinkled at the corner from his smile.

“that’s my girl,” he mused, pushing his hips the rest of the way into yours so he could be completely buried in your femininity. you let out a loud moan at the intrusion, the complete and utter fullness that came with having him so deep inside you overwhelming you for a moment.

embry only gave you a moment to compose yourself before he was drawing his hips back and thrusting back into you, “oh my god-” you whimpered, knotting your fingers in his hair as you tugged him back down to smash your lips against his again.

his thrusts were long, steady, and rough, the bed rocking with each thrust of his hips into yours. as he worked you two into a rhythm, a slew of filthy praises fell from his lips

“such a tight little pussy,” 

“fuck your pussy feels like heaven,”

“can’t wait to cum inside that pretty little pussy,”

“this pussy is mine now, yea? not giving it to anyone else,” 

his free hand traveled down to your breasts, the stiff peaks that were your nipples finally getting some much-needed attention as he groped at the mounds, rolling your nipples between his fingers. 

“oh embry-” you whined, head dropping back against the sheets as he continued fucking you. even though you weren’t totally confident you were able to cum at all with a man, let alone twice in one night - you quickly felt the familiar coil in your belly tightening as your second orgasm began building up.

he knew before you did, the tightening of your walls around his cock signaling to him everything he needed to know, “you wanna cum on my cock, pretty thing?” he gritted out, maintaining the steady rhythm he set as he worked you towards your orgasm.

“please-” you gasped out, “wanna cum on your cock embry please-” you whimpered, blubbering out all he needed to hear as desperation took over your mind and body.

“cum on my cock then,” he groaned, barely containing his own composure as he struggled not to meet his own release before you met yours. 

he dropped his free hand from your breast to navigate between your legs where he was currently wreaking absolute havoc on you, finding your clit with little issue so he could roll the sensitive nub between his fingers and release the coil that was your orgasm.

you went liquid smooth in his arms as you came, stars dancing around your vision as your orgasm hit you like a tidal wave. the rapid throbbing of your walls around him had embry meeting his own release within a few seconds of yours. a loud moan left his lips as thrusts stuttered and he coated your swollen walls with his release.

both of you struggled to come back to your senses and as embry did, he loosened his grip on you so he could gently run his free hand up and down your side to coax you back down.

“you’ve got it, pretty thing,” he cooed, dropping his head to pepper your collarbone and neck with soft kisses until your grip loosened on him and you gently stroked your hands up and down his back. 

once he was confident you were back to earth enough for him to move, embry slowly pulled himself out of your now soaked channel, both of your breathing heavy as you worked to come back to your senses, “good?” embry asked breathlessly, both of you letting out laughs when you quickly nodded. 

“so good,” you reassured, “can we stay like this for a little bit?” you asked, voice quieting as you voiced your request to him - not totally sure if that was something he was comfortable with.

embry’s gaze softened when he heard the insecurity shining through your voice, “‘course we can,” he reassured, “c’mere,” he murmured, rolling out from inbetween your thighs so he could pull you close to his chest, “just let me know when you’re ready and i can clean you up, okay?” 

you hummed and nodded, nuzzling your nose against his collarbone as you got settled in his arms, “is it always like this?” you whispered, smiling when he squeezed you even closer to him for a moment.

“always like this,” embry smiled as he pressed his lips to your hair, “and we’ll ease into everything, yea? i’m just here to make you feel good,” he mused, both of you more than happy to know he would be the one who was in charge of maximizing your pleasure.

[drarryspecificrecs]

2024.10 ~ Top 10 longest fics posted on AO3

1. Celestial Being by Year_ofthe_Rabbit [?, 192k]

The entire universe conspired to make clear that the king Draco’s family had put into power deserved to be overthrown in a bloody coup, to be replaced by a younger, brighter, more beloved king. Draco lost everything and was left to live as a despised servant in his aunt's household. He didn't accept it. No, he would do whatever it took to recapture the life he deserved. Even if that was only possible during an equinox ball, where he could live one anonymous night at a time as a captivating celestial being.

2. In Over My Head by @dracoispookie [E, 184k]

The first wizard going to Hogwarts Harry ever meets is an older boy who is polite, funny, and very good looking. Harry navigates his way through school knowing one thing for sure: he's in way over his head.

3. Comfortable by @peculiarmindset [E, 155k]

Draco and Harry goes through the uncharted waters in their relationship, and slowly become more and more comfortable with one another.

4. what shipwrecks look like by @dancingsparks [E, 149k]

It's after the war, but not terribly long after. Just enough for things to appear happily settled. Draco is an Obliviator. Harry is an Auror. Draco is desperately jealous of that.

5. Defiant Hearts by @coffeedrgn87 [E, 117k]

In Regency England, the price of love is high. Draco, the sole heir to the Malfoy family's vast fortune and reputation, longs to marry for love. His father, Lucius Malfoy—a cold, heartless man—disagrees. With his father breathing down his neck, demanding that Draco court a suitable young lady, Draco's time to find a love match is running out. Then there's Harry, the last descendant of the Potter family, once a noble house with a vast fortune, great respect, and considerable influence. Harry knows his duties, but what he truly desires is a love match—an equal. When an unexpected Regency-style meet-cute turns everyone's plans upside down, Draco becomes a rebel, and Harry must make a decision that will define the rest of his life.

6. Between Chalk Dust and Second Chances by fiella [E, 114k]

6 years after the war, Harry and Draco become colleges - Professors of Defence and Potions at Hogwarts. On top of it, they have to share a residence. What could possibly go wrong?

7. Can't turn back now (I'm haunted) by exhiled_spirit [M, 108k]

Draco left his friends and (ex) husband in hopes of moving on from his heartbreak and finding himself in the muggle world. Four years later he returned, rich and famous, to finish off his never ending divorce.

8. Taking Off The Rose Coloured Glasses by @thatwheelchairchick [M, 85k]

After his fourth year at Hogwarts, Harry Potter returns to the Dursleys, where their abuse escalates dramatically, leaving him physically and emotionally shattered. Haunted by nightmares and the voice of Voldemort in his mind, Harry begins to doubt Dumbledore’s intentions, recalling past manipulations. Desperate and near death from a particularly brutal beating, Harry reluctantly accepts Voldemort’s offer of help.

9. a barely lit path by @garagepaperback [E, 64k]

Harry wakes up wanting to live, Draco seems determined to - well, not die, exactly, but you could hardly call it a life, either. /// Featuring: peacocks and a family curse, avoidance, red-rimmed eyes in a blanket fort, a fantastic variety of headaches, sobriety, a toy finger trap and whether or not it's possible for good to grow out of something ugly.

10. Your Heart Got a Story With Mine by futurefortem [M, 62k]

When a wizard or witch turns 17 they become off age. When a wizard or witch turns 18 though they discover their soulmate. On Harry's 18th birthday his world turns upside down. /// Or, the one where Draco and Harry are forced to overcome their differences and discover what it actually was that kept fire burning between them.

※ HONOURABLE MENTIONS :

11. Rotations by TheCrowCrone [E, 53k]

Trainee Auror Potter receives a new assignment as an Azkaban guard and his life, which finally seems to be settling into something almost normal, is turned upsidedown once more the night he saves Draco Malfoy. But in a post-war world, at least for Harry, the smallest things, like appreciating a sunset and enjoying a hot meal, are sometimes the hardest, while the big things, like death and forgiveness, don't seem that tough. And sometimes, he's just an idiot who falls in love too easily.

12. Draco Malfoy and the Pride of the Lion by Fantasy_Critter11 [G, 52k]

All his life Draco Malfoy has awaited the day when he'd finally get to ride the Hogwarts Express to the school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and of his dreams. Those dreams are upended in seconds, however, when he sees a scrawny boy pacing outside of the barrier, asking how to get onto platform nine and three quarters. [...] Hogwarts is quickly becoming nothing like Draco had expected it to be in his dreams, but he'll soon find he may not mind being part of the Gryffindor pride as he initially thought.

13. What Fills the Void That’s Left Behind by @tessacrowley [E, 46k] --- ART by @itsphantasmagoria

At the end of October, Draco Malfoy slashes open both wrists and bleeds to death. By the middle of November, Head Auror Harry Potter agrees to take his case. But there are entities more ghastly than the ghosts that haunt the Malfoy Manor, and fates more horrible than death. When the wound is so deep that you lose a part of yourself, what fills the void that’s left behind?

—

※ Word count: 1k ~ 15k

※ Word count: 15k ~ 40k

All is found by ProseMary [G, 16k]

Come, Sweet Death by EvilDime [E, 27k]

Daring Revelations by @spicyfirenoodles [E, 26k]

Everything is coming up Draco by @liligalaxy [M, 37k]

Green by @pixiedunhoff [E, 17k]

The Guardian and The Sword by @mykkitno [?, 37k]

It's Not Hate Sex If You're Secretly In Love With Your Baby Daddy! by @peachydreamxx [E, 33k] --- ART by @littlewinnow

the latch is undone by @aibidil [E, 24k]

Old Rivalries, New Beginnings by @philosophersandfools [T, 29k]

Raising Hell! by @wolfpants [E, 21k]

Start My Heart by Truelee_A_Black [T, 21k]

—

Ongoing Fest/Exchange

※ Fics would be listed elsewhere.

2024 H/D Muggle Fair | @hd-fan-fair

Cult of Chaos Cultober 2024

Gothic Fantasy Fest 2024 | @twhos-fests��

HP Halloween Fest 2024

Trick 4 Treat: A Twisted Sweet

[spawnofbhaal]

A take I've been seeing at times (which is valid, people interpret things differently) is that Rook will know the "real" Solas more than the Inquisitor did (even a romanced Lavellan) and . . . I personally don't agree. Solas the god is just as much of a mask as "I'm a simple apostate" Solas. Solas' followers in Tevinter Nights and the comics know him as Fen'Harel, but they don't know him as a person. Iirc in one of the comics (the Blue Wraith or Magekiller series maybe?) a follower of his calls him "master," which is anathema to everything Solas believes in. How much your character (Inquisitor or presumably Rook) gets to know the real him depends on the effort they put into it and the empathy they show him.

Also, the circumstances of Inquisition facilitate Solas being able to show his true personality quite well. He *has* to interact with people rather than distancing himself from them the way he did before the Conclave and after Corypheus' defeat; he is exposed to views that differ from his that he can't resist speaking against; he can form true connections with others he befriends or falls in love with. He tells romanced Lavellan they saw more of him than most, and that he would not romance them under false pretenses and pretend to be someone he isn't. I take these statements at face value because I think his writer is trying to tell us Solas is genuine with romanced Lavellan (as they have said to fans in the past). The man who loves telling stories, who hates tea and loves frilly cakes, who kisses with tongue, who lights his own coat on fire sometimes, that is the real Solas. The Inquisitor just has to pay attention to see it.

While someone's history is an important part of who they are, and I'm sure we will discover a lot about Solas' past in Veilguard, a person is also not entirely defined by their history. Solas' past and present godlike power is also not what defines him as a person. The impression I got from Trespasser is that even though Fen'Harel is an important part of who Solas is, at the center of it all, he's just a man. Fen'Harel was a title forced upon him, as Inquisitor was forced on our protagonist. I don't think Solas' entire personality is going to change just because he's taken on the mantle of Fen'Harel again now. And I don't think he will be entirely transparent with Rook, not unless they work hard for his trust over the course of the game. I actually expect Solas to start off as more cold and closed off than in DAI because he isn't in a situation where he has to act friendly.

I somewhat resent the implication that Solas as he has already shown himself to be in DAI is not the real Solas, that romanced!Lavellan only loves him as the apostate hobo when the whole point of the romance is Lavellan seeing past the disguise. And Lavellan learns the truth of him being Fen'Harel in Trespasser (Lavellan can even piece it together by themselves before they confront Solas!!!) and can still be in love with him ("If you had just told me;" "I loved you. Did you really think I wouldn't have understood?"; "I would have had you trust me"). Honestly, I think that's why the romance works at all: Solas was in a situation where he could show his genuine personality, and that's what Lavellan falls in love with. Not an idealized humble woodsman, nor a powerful godlike being, but a flawed, conflicted person. I don't know how it gets more "real" than that.

[shamebats]

[a text post from r/trans that titled Intersexism within the trans community that reads: "Hi everyone, I'm an intersex enby. As I interact with the trans community, it's becoming more clear to me that a lot of perisex trans people don't understand the intersex experience as much as they think they do and it's creating some problems.

First, intersexism exists, and it's not inherently transphobia. Given the current political climate, is a lot of intersex hate also directed towards trans people? Yes, it is unfortunately. That does not mean that all intersex hate is also trans hate. I've faced intersexism from trans people from this very community, which is why I'm making this post in the first place. If an intersex person tells you about their experience, listen to them! If an intersex person tells you how what you said is leaving out or erasing intersex people, listen to them! If your response is "well you're wrong because I can reduce this down to a binary", that is the entire backbone of intersexist thinking. You need to consider that nothing is binary when it comes to personal identities and that there is always room for nuance.

Second, I've like to cover AGAB. AGAB for perisex people is very different from AGAB for intersex people. No matter how you define AGAB, AGAB describes the way perisex people were assumed to be when they were born. Whether this assumption is correct or not generally determines whether they're cis or trans. For intersex people, AGAB moreso describes the "side" that was picked for us or direction we were forced to transition to. Regardless if that was the "correct" side/direction, it's not a useful metric for determining the transness of intersex people. Using any definition of AGAB and applying it to all intersex people leaves out a lot of nuance that many intersex people have to live with since the day we were born. Many of us detransition after we discovered we were forcibly transitioned, such as myself. Many of us feel that our gender and sex aren't capable of fitting into any binary, such as myself. By using AGAB alone to determine if an intersex person is trans for example, not only are you reducing us to yet another binary you're expecting us to conform ourselves to, you're also essentially saying "You need to base your entire identity on what was forcibly taken from you, not based on any conclusion you came to about yourself."

Third, which kind of plays into the previous point, labels are nothing more than tools that are used for people to understand themselves and others better. If someone has labels that you don't understand, just politely ask them and try to understand where they're coming from. If they don't make sense to you, trying to "correct" the other person won't do anything except upset both of you in a petty argument that won't go anywhere. Even if you don't "agree" with the labels that someone uses for themself, it's not your life and you have no right to tell someone how they should interpret their own life. This is especially true for intersex people who often have complicated and messy relationships with sex and gender that perisex people just aren't able to understand. Label policing only causes infighting and hurts the LGBTQ+ community.

Tldr: just listen to intersex people when they tell you about themselvess" end ID]

Link to post.

[tgcg]

part 3 of something specific

CG: SO YEAH, THERE’S NOTHING BLACK ABOUT HOW THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS SET UP BEYOND PURE SUPERFICIALITY. THEIR RIVALRY IS TEXTUALLY POSITIVE BOTH TO THEM AND FOR THEM, BECAUSE IT LEADS TO THE DISCOVERY OF THEIR STRONGEST BONDS, WHICH ARE TO EACH OTHER. AS SOON AS SASUKE DISCOVERS HIS BROTHER’S RETURN, HIS IMMEDIATE CONCERN IS TO GO OUT OF HIS WAY AND FIND NARUTO TO ENSURE HIS SAFETY.

TG: (man how is karkats hair always the exact same amount of messy)

CG: SASUKE FINDS NARUTO ANNOYING, BUT SO DOES LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE IN HIS VICINITY! SO IT’S NOT LIKE THEY HAVE A UNIQUE BOND REGARDING ANY CONTEMPT FOR ONE ANOTHER.

TG: (its like hes got that shit down to a science)

CG: THEY DON’T HATE EACH OTHER DEEP DOWN! AND THAT’S THE CRUCIAL PART, THE ABSENTEE SUPPORT BEAM THAT PROMPTS THE FOUNDATIONS OF BLACKROM TO CRUMBLE IN ON THEMSELF. NO DAVE, THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS DEFINED BY EMPATHY AND COMPASSION.

TG: (professor sepulchritude were noticing a 0.6% decrease in the angle of elevation in the frontmost swoop)

CG: NARUTO KNOWS ALMOST FROM THE BEGINNING THAT ANY HATRED SASUKE HOLDS FOR THE WORLD ISN’T DIRECTED AT HIM WHATSOEVER. HE DIRECTLY ACKNOWLEDGES THIS WITHIN THE TEXT!

TG: (unacceptable doctor dicktopus, apply several degrees worth of emotional turmoil and see to it that the issue is ass blasted to oblivion)

TG: (fuck yes sir)

CG: SASUKE SAYS HIMSELF THAT HE FINDS SAKURA REALLY ANNOYING, AND SAKURA IS IN TURN MOST ANNOYED BY NARUTO.

CG: AGAIN, SQUANDERED POTENTIAL. FUCK THAT.

TG: (is it natural or premeditated is some kind of product involved)

TG: (did alternia have fucked up guerilla combs designed to mangle your hair just right)

CG: … DAVE?

TG: (actually hell nah i couldnt see him doing that in a billion shitty troll sweeps)

CG: METEOR TO FUCKING DAVE?

TG: (no doubt he just rocks up like that)

TG: (man looks the same every day)

CG: DAVE!

TG: (shit abort)

CG: GOD DAMNIT. YOU AREN’T LISTENING ARE YOU? YOU’RE DOING THAT THING AGAIN WHERE YOUR LIPS START MOVING WHILE I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF TELLING YOU SOMETHING! JEGUS, AT LEAST HAVE THE BASIC TROLLIAN DECENCY TO INTERRUPT ME WITH CONVICTION IF YOU'RE GOING TO HUMOUR AN EXCHANGE IN CULTURE, YOU ABSOLUTE TOOL.

CG: DID YOU EVEN GET A WORD OF WHAT I SAID?

CG: WELL YOU’RE THE ONE WHO ASKED, CHUCKLEFUCK! SO--

TG: yeah theyre just quivering in tearful delight at self recognition through the other dude

TG: if not for these sick shades youd be moved to shit by the glistening eyejuice gathering in these peepholes

TG: fit to burst but i remain static in the face of euphoria

TG: im protecting your ass such as a knight is pretty much wont to do

CG: PFF, WHATEVER, “DUDE”.

[thef1diary]

hiii could u write a danny or carlos fic based on mess it up by gracie abrams? maybe smtg angsty w happy ending ??

Self Sabotage | D. Ricciardo

Summary: you leave Daniel because things are going too well, but you realize it's the worst decision you've ever made.

© thef1diary 2024. all rights reserved. Do not copy, steal, translate, or repost any of my work.

masterlist taglist form

Warnings: angst, insecurity (on reader's end), negative thoughts, allusion to childhood trauma, mention of failed past relationships, lil bit of fluff/comfort.

wc: 2.2k

You were waiting for the other shoe to drop. Things had been well between you and Daniel, in fact it was going too well that it worried you.

You believed that there would be a day where Daniel would show his true colours; prove that every promise, every gesture of love he made was nothing but a lie.

That day never came. He loved you endlessly, showering you in gifts and affirmations which only deepened your fear.

Opened two double doors

Despite Daniel's unwavering love and sincerity, you couldn't shake the feeling that you didn't deserve such happiness. Deep-seated insecurities gnawed at you, whispering that it was only a matter of time before you ruined everything.

Unable to bear the weight of your own self-doubt, you made the painful decision to push Daniel away before he could discover the flaws you believed defined you.

Typical, pretty sure I could grow up

With a heavy heart, you packed your belongings in silence, the weight of your decision pressing down on you with each item you carefully placed in boxes. As you moved through the rooms of your shared home, memories flooded your mind, each corner holding echoes of laughter, whispered promises, and tender moments shared with Daniel. The emptiness of the space around you mirrored the ache in your chest as you realized what you were about to leave behind.

With Daniel away, you found solace in the solitude of your departure, sparing both of you the agony of a tearful goodbye. Each item packed was a step closer to severing the ties that bound you together, a painful but necessary act of self-preservation.

Probably chemical

As you closed the door behind you for the last time, the weight of your decision settled over you like a shroud, leaving behind a home that once held the promise of a future you were no longer sure you deserved.

Driving away from the home you once shared with Daniel, tears blurred your vision as you navigated the familiar streets, each turn carrying you further from the life you had built together. The radio played softly in the background, a bittersweet soundtrack to your departure, as memories of happier times intertwined with the ache of loss.

I took up walking to turn it all off

Despite the pain, a small voice inside whispered that you were doing the right thing, that by leaving, you were sparing Daniel the burden of loving someone who couldn't love themselves. Yet, even as you tried to convince yourself that this was for the best, doubt crept in, casting shadows of regret over your decision.

You grip the steering wheel tightly, your knuckles turning white as you navigate the familiar streets. Glancing at the passenger seat, you see a photo of you and your boyfriend, smiling blissfully. It feels like a mockery now, a reminder of what you shattered.

Doesn't feel bearable

With a huff, you turned it over so you don't see his handsome smile staring back at you that always led you right into his arms, his laugh that was contagious enough to make you laugh as well.

You couldn't stop thinking about him or all the reasons you fell in love with him. He was perfect and unfortunately you didn't believe that you were enough for him.

Guess I thought when I left it would all stop

Opening the window, you let the breeze gather your thoughts and whisk them all away, both negative and positive. All you knew was that you had to leave him because it was good for him. He could find someone better than you, much better.

Your phone buzzes, his name flashing on the screen. You hesitate before answering, your heart pounding in your chest.

"Hey," you say, your voice barely above a whisper.

Hmm, it would all stop

"Hey, babe! What are you up to?" His voice is filled with warmth, but you can't shake the guilt building inside you.

"Nothing, just hanging about, you know how it is without you," you reply, forcing a smile you know he can't see.

"You sound a bit off. Is everything okay?" Concern colors his words.

When I told you "I'm fine", you were lied to

"Yeah, everything's fine. Just tired from the day, I guess," you lie, the weight of your deceit heavy on your chest.

"Okay, well, I miss you. I can't wait to get back to you," he says, his longing evident in his voice.

"I miss you too," you reply, feeling the sting of your betrayal with every word. You did truly miss him and you know that you would miss him even more as time would go on.

How could I think that all that I gave you was enough?

As you hang up the phone, you're consumed by guilt. You know what you're doing is wrong, but you can't stop now.

You continue driving, the weight of your decision bearing down on you with each passing mile. The road stretches endlessly ahead, mirroring the uncertainty gnawing at your conscience.

'Cause every time I get too close, I just go mess it up

Daniel's words echo in your mind, his longing for you palpable even through the phone. You can't shake the image of his face, filled with love and trust, oblivious to the lie you've just told him.

Even with the music and open windows, the car still becomes suffocating. You steal another glance at the photo frame you flipped over on the passenger seat, your heart twisting with guilt.

Funny that didn't work

A sudden urge to turn back grips you, but you push it aside. It's too late now, you tell yourself. You've made your choice.

Half an hour passes, the landscape blurring into a haze of regret and doubt. Your mind races with what-ifs and maybes, each one a dagger to your already wounded conscience and heart.

Suddenly, your phone rings again, jolting you out of your thoughts. Daniel's name flashes on the screen, but this time you don't pick up his call.

I could be anywhere, I'm on your block

"I'm sorry, Daniel," you whisper, turning off your phone so you don't see another call or text from him.

A wave of sadness washes over you, mingled with a tinge of guilt. Despite knowing deep down that leaving Daniel was the right decision for both of you, it doesn't make the pain any easier to bear.

Cynical, terrible

You take a deep breath, trying to steady your trembling hands as you focus on the road ahead. Each mile feels like an eternity, the weight of your decision heavy on your heart.

Memories of your time with Daniel flood your mind – the laughter, the shared dreams, the moments of pure joy that you thought would last forever. But somewhere along the way, the cracks began to form, the doubts and insecurities creeping in your mind until it threatened to consume you both.

Kicking myself with my gut in a knot

As you drive further and further away from him, you can't help but wonder if you've made a mistake. What if you're throwing away the best thing that ever happened to you? What if you'll never find someone who understands you the way Daniel did?

But then you remember the tears you shed, the sleepless nights spent without him, agonizing over whether to stay or go. You remember the feeling of suffocation, of being trapped in a relationship that was slowly suffocating you purely because you never felt such love before. Instead of accepting it, or at least telling him about it, you chose to endure it until it became unbearable.

'Cause I heard that you're happier

Perhaps you couldn't find someone better than Daniel, he was truly one of the best ones. But that thought didn't deter you away from your decision because you were the one always causing problems, always letting your own thoughts become the reason to end a relationship.

As you drive on into the night, you realize that leaving Daniel was the only way to save him from you. It wasn't easy, and it certainly wasn't painless, but you know in your heart that it was the right thing to do.

Hope that you're sleeping well knowing I'm not

In the weeks following the breakup, a sense of emptiness settled over you like a heavy fog, each day passing in a blur of regret and longing. As you reflected on what had led you to push Daniel away, you couldn't escape the realization that your own insecurities and past traumas had played a significant role in sabotaging the one good thing in your life.

Memories of past relationships haunted your thoughts, whispering tales of betrayal and heartbreak, leaving you unable to fully trust in the love Daniel offered so freely. Childhood wounds, buried deep beneath layers of self-preservation, resurfaced with a vengeance, casting doubt on your worthiness of happiness.

I'm doing too much, hmm

In the quiet moments of solitude, you found yourself grappling with the harsh reality of your actions, longing to turn back the hands of time and undo the damage you had wrought. With each passing day, the weight of regret grew heavier, until it became too much to bear.

He called many times when you finally turned your phone on, but you were too much of a coward to reply to any of his messages. You could tell he was hurt based on the voicemails he left, asking what he did wrong for you to leave abruptly. Daniel had wanted to surprise you by coming home a day early, and you ruined it by not being there.

Did I fall out of line when I called you?

Just like you ruined everything else in your life. You cried yourself to sleep that night, lulling yourself by playing his voicemails over and over again because despite his tone revealing he cried, he still loved you.

Summoning all the courage you could muster, you sought out Daniel, driven by an overwhelming need to make amends, to lay bare the truth of your fears and insecurities.

When I told you "I'm fine"

You stood on the step in front of the house you once called yours, and if everything went well, it would be yours again along with his.

Daniel opened the door, shock covering his features. He gazed at you from head to toe, checking if you were injured but once he was satisfied, his gaze hardened as it connected with yours.

"Daniel," you began, your voice trembling with emotion as you stood before him, "I need to talk to you."

You were lied to

Noticing the hesitation in your tone, his eyes softened, finally coming to a realization that you were truly standing in front of him after being left alone for weeks.

"What happened?" he asked, concern lacing his words. He itched to touch you, to hold you, but he needed to know your stance on your relationship.

How could I think that all that I gave you was enough?

Tears welled up in your eyes as you struggled to find the right words. "I'm so sorry," you whispered, your voice barely above a whisper. "I made a mistake. I let my fears get the best of me, and I pushed you away."

Daniel's brow furrowed in confusion and worry. Ignoring the voice in his head to stay away, he pulled you closer, hugging you and sighing as he found relief by having you in his arms.

I keep thinking maybe if you let me back in

"Why did you push me away? We could've talked," he muttered as he felt your tears wetting the crook of his neck. "It's... it's complicated," you replied, your voice cracking with emotion.

He pulled back, "did I do something?"

You quickly shook your head, "no, you're perfect. I got scared. Scared of getting hurt again, of letting someone in only to be left broken and alone. But I see now that I let my past dictate my future, and I lost sight of what truly mattered, how much you mattered."

We can make it better, breaking every habit

Silence hung heavy between you, the weight of your confession filling the space between your hearts. Then, finally, Daniel spoke, his voice soft but filled with pain. "I don't understand why you didn't talk to me about this sooner," he said, his eyes searching yours for answers.

"I was afraid," you admitted, tears streaming down your cheeks. "Afraid that if I opened up to you, you would see the broken pieces of me and walk away. But now I realize that keeping you at arm's length was the biggest mistake of my life."

Pull myself together, you could watch it happen

Daniel reached out, gently wiping away your tears with his thumb. "I'm not going anywhere," he said, his voice firm with conviction. "I love you, flaws and all. But we need to work through this together, okay?"

With a trembling smile, you nodded, feeling the weight of his words lift the burden from your shoulders.

In that moment, you knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you would face them together, hand in hand, guided by the light of love and forgiveness.

Let it happen, let it happen

Taglist: @nikfigueiredo @wonnou @jointhehunt67 @gxuh @lochnoch @llando4norris @monsieurbacteria6 @namgification @lilymurphy03 @sargeantdumbass @hiireadstuff @racingheartsposts @d3kstar @xjval @namjoonswaifu @isabellewinchester @thedecalcomania-blog @casperlikej @khaylin27 @mlioravanfleet @xoxonoire

[alphajocklover]

When I first started this blog — and started reporting on transformation in general — my first report was on a strange phenomenon I called ‘Supernova Transformations.’ It’s where any wish made upon a certain star, an unusually bright and mysterious supernova, would be granted in a twisted, sexually charged way. I haven’t talked about it in a while, since lately I’ve been focusing more on mysteries a little closer to home, but I’d be lying through my teeth if I said I wasn’t still intrigued by the seemingly magical exploding star. I think every reporter, TF or regular, has a special place in their heart for their first story, and I’m no exception. That fondness is part of the reason why I recently decided to look further into the Supernova itself, which has led me to discover something… fairly strange.

I once theorized that the light from the supernova was what was granting wishes and transforming people, but new evidence I’ce found suggests that is only half right. The light is magic, and is of the power of the supernova to grant wishes comes from, but the light isn’t actually what transforms people. Because the magic of the light actually travels faster than light itself.

Part of what defines magic is the fact that it does the impossible. That’s why when someone wishes on the mysterious supernova, the wish is granted quickly, instead of taking the years it would take for light to travel from a distant star. The magic itself travels much faster, comes to earth, and grants to wish in a sexually charged way.

But… that doesn’t mean the light isn’t also coming to earth. And while the magic is faster… the magic infused light is much, much more powerful. And once it reaches earth… Everyone will be transformed. By all the wishes made on the star, all at once. Or, in other words…

When the light of the supernova comes to earth, everyone will be transformed into dumb, horny sex gods.

I didn’t believe it at first. I mean, I’ve used a Time Machine before, I’ve been to the future! I know not everyone is transformed. But… after taking a closer look at my Time Machine, I realized I’ve never been that far into the future. In fact… it won’t take me that far. The people who gave me the Time Machine, the Douchebag Revolution, they must have programmed the machine not to go to that time period. I’ve reached out to them but they’ve been weirdly quiet about the whole thing.

The good news is we have plenty of time before the light gets here. By my calculations the light still has another 100 light years to travel. So, we have time. But… in about 100 years, things are going to get really crazy.

It might not last forever, and we might figure out a way to stop it from happening at all, but if we don’t? The world might just end with a huge worldwide orgy.

Not the worst way to go out.

**hey everyone! Sorry this took so long! I’ve been kind of depressed lately but I’m getting myself back in the swing of things, and getting back to writing! I hope you guys like my 100th story, and how it relates back to my first story. Stay tuned for more!**

[servantofthefates]

If life is an experiment, your Uranus is your laboratory.

Uranus in the First House: Your Body

You will likely go through various rebrandings in your life. From nerd to glam. From emo to CEO. It will take you a while to discover what you want your physical vessel to look like.

Uranus in the Second House: Your Wallet

You will likely go back and forth between having an excess of money and having none at all. It will take you a while to figure out the right ingredients for financial stability.

Uranus in the Third House: Your Words

You will likely go through various makeovers in how you speak. From punk to poet. From high street to high-end. It will take you a while to discover how to communicate your true self.

Uranus in the Fourth House: Your Home

You will likely experience an unstable home life. That could mean moving around a lot, or your family changing frequently (e.g., through marriage). It will take you a while to find home as it should be.

Uranus in the Fifth House: Your Joy

You will likely have changing hobbies and interests as you grow. Even to the point of being ashamed of what you previously liked (e.g., a band, a celebrity). It will take you a while to discover what your soul enjoys.

Uranus in the Sixth House: Your Lifestyle

You will likely have drastic changes in routines that relate to your identity. From vegan to carnivore. From fitness buff to couch potato. It will take you a while to realize how you want to experience life.

Uranus in the Seventh House: Your Relationships

Your taste in connections (romantic and more) will likely keep evolving. From light to burdened. From friendly to brooding. It will take you a while to realize what you want and need your people to be like.

Uranus in the Eighth House: Your Morals

You will likely have changing definitions of what is wrong. From seeing things like Satanism and death penalty as evil, to thinking they are good, for example. It will take you a while to define your principles.

Uranus in the Ninth House: Your Faith

You will likely have different beliefs throughout your life. You might keep switching from one religion to another and to none at all. It will take you a while to form a true connection with a higher power.

Uranus in the Tenth House: Your Reputation

You will likely have different ranks in society throughout your life. From pleb to socialite. From royalty to nobody. It will take you a while to decide how you want the world to see you in this lifetime.

Uranus in the Eleventh House: Your Community

You will likely be a part of vastly different groups throughout your life. From religious fanatics to agnostic intellectuals. From celebrities to nuns. It will take you a while to discover where you belong in life.

Uranus in the Twelfth House: Your Pain

You will likely have different ideas of what hurts. You could go from crying at the sight of war-torn countries to shrugging about their plight. It will take you a while to decide on what is fair and unfair in this life.

In Whole Sign Houses, my Uranus is in the Ninth. I was raised Catholic. But in truth, I was mostly agnostic. At a fairly young age, I discovered Greco-Roman paganism from my elders who practice it in semi-combination with Christianity. Then in college, I had to pretend to be an atheist around judgmental religious fanatics who hated witchcraft. Now I am a practicing pagan who follows my ancestors' writings over my living elders' teachings. Can you also feel your Uranus manifesting?

Related: If life is a battlefield, your Mars is your weapon.

[starwell-tarot]

PAC: What part of you requires some introspection this summer? ⛱️

Pick a pile reading: What aspect of yourself or your life needs some thinking over? What questions should you be asking yourself this summer to get to know yourself better?

Pile 1-3, left to right

Pick the picture you feel most drawn to. If you feel drawn to more than one of them, you can read the interpretation to multiple piles.

Disclaimer: All my readings contain themes of mental and emotional struggles and pains as they strive to comfort those. I don't intend on rubbing you the wrong way and I'm doing this with the hope I can help people feel better, but if it doesn't work I might just not be the right person to comfort you.

Disclaimer: I'm not a mental health professional in any way. Although my tarot readings focus on giving emotional and mental reassurance, I can only give you as much as a friend could give you - encouraging words, friendly advice, a shoulder to cry on or a metaphorical hug. Please take in the information responsibly, and if your mental health is greatly affecting your day to day functions, please consider looking for a professional if possible. I'm afraid I can't be more than a tarot-enthusiastic friend.

Take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Take care of yourselves and remember hope is your best friend. 🖤

Pile 1 - VIII of Pentacles, Four of Wands, Knight of Swords, Balsamic Moon

Who do I dream of becoming?

The key elements in your reading are your dreams and hard work.

It seems like you have a very clear idea of how your ideal life would look like, and it's beautiful. So beautiful in fact, that the cards depict a twirling dance, gracious and romantic. There is a version of you that you have fallen in love with, but I fear you think it's unreachable. You might have put some work into it already, into reaching your goals, and yet you still feel far away from what you want to achieve. But do not rush.

No big dream in life is easily accessible to grab. They require patience and perseverance, and a lot of obstacles must be overcome before you can finally feel you've gotten everything you ever wanted. The key here is, you must avoid self-sabotage. Perhaps you are insecure, or you lack self-belief, or you get easily discouraged. Know that failure is only the path to success, so look into the lesson you can learn from your mistakes, instead of letting them consume you. Look ahead to the future fully, and break down the demons in your head into tiny little digestible pieces. Identify all of your obstacles, the things (or people) that might stand in-between you and the version of you you dream of. Think of ways you can solve these obstacles, one by one, slowly and surely. Go into the smallest of details when you question what is stopping you, where exactly you stand right now, and everything you want to achieve. Plan and be meticulous.

The balsamic moon gives the advice that, in order to become this dream version of yourself, you must first let go of all the limitations you've put onto yourself, taken from the past you've lived. Your past circumstances should not define you anymore, and you must allow yourself to change and live as though you are truly reborn into the person you want to be. 💚

Pile 2 - The Lovers R, Knight of Wands, Balsamic Moon

Who am I becoming?

The key elements in your reading are self-image and transformations.

It seems that for a very long time, you thought you knew exactly who you were and what you needed. You didn't feel much need to change the way you were doing things, and you were wearing your own personal colors permanently, and they were painting a self image of you. And lately, there's new colors on the canvas. And you don't know what to do with them. It is almost like discovering there's a whole another person living in your body, a strange experience of newly acquired self-knowledge. This can be uncomfortable, but know we as people are always expanding. Whether you are changing for good or for bad (this is also subjective) it is something you must embrace and address. If you fear you are turning into an unknown, malefic force, figure out what is making you act this way, and face the demon in the mirror. There's darkness in all of us, and we're allowed to be imperfect, but we must not let it consume us. Tell the darkness you see it, you acknowledge it and you'll work hard to heal it so that it doesn't burst out again. If you feel you're turning into something unfamiliar and strange, but not exactly bad, you must address what it brings into your life. Perhaps it's a change you needed. Perhaps you're on your path to growth, and that's always confusing.

All in all, do not resist strangeness and changes in yourself - instead, identify these changes, welcome them in, and let them talk to you. Let them tell you what they need from you, what presents they bring, or what old beliefs they want to replace. The balsamic moon gives the advice that you should be open to change, for that's what defines the future moment. The past cannot change, it is merely a limitation. Do not limit yourself, and instead let the future gently sway you. 💛

Pile 3 - Ace of Cups, Knight of Wands, New Moon

Why am I afraid of saying yes?

The key elements of your reading are self-love and opportunities.

I feel like you are in a very strange situation of almost… procrastinating self-love. You know you deserve more, but you cannot bring yourself to accept it. But deep inside, you know.

Deep inside you know you bring beautiful things into the world. Deep inside you know your quirks are not negative as you see them. Deep inside I think you know you deserve all the love in the world. You simply must accept it, so that you can finally let yourself receive all the beautiful things you've been denying yourself of having. I fear what is keeping you stuck is heavy and tangled, binding you to this version of yourself that is afraid to ask for more. These binds must be untangled. Try to think why you are denying all the blessings - what makes you believe all of these negative things about yourself? Once you find the cause, ask yourself if that situation is, in fact, still relevant to the person you are today. Once you let go of your old belief systems, you can finally be free. And if the fear of change is strong, or you cannot let go of your beliefs, ask yourself: what is the worst thing that could happen if I love myself a bit today? Who's stopping me from doing that?

The new moon gives the advice that the hardest part of everything is always the start. However, once you begin to allow a little kindness, a little love to grace you, things will slowly become less and less uncomfortable. Baby steps can take you a long way. It is time you allow your life to become beautiful. 💙

I hope this reading was useful to you!

Please consider leaving some feedback so I know if my readings resonate well. 🖤

While introspection is hugely important for self development, do not forget having fun is just as important for the mental health! So go have fun this summer 😉

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