#THIS HAS BEEN SITTING IN MY DRAFTS FOR A MONTH SO SOMEONE PROBABLY ALREADY POINTED IT OUT I DON’T GIVE A SHIT

[kiryoutann]

disclaimer and cw: fem! reader. one-nightstand, unplanned pregnancy, vomitting.

CALL OF DUTY MASTERLIST.

journalist! reader, abandoning her draft of an article about SpecGru's (your favorite hockey team) recent win, is forced by her coworkers to "have some fun" AND got dragged to a party. seated around a table full of alcohol that your friends have ordered, loud music blares around you almost to the point of damaging your eardrums.

they say you deserve it - something about how they know you're burying yourself in work not only because you're a workaholic and a huge fan of SpecGru, but also to distract yourself from your recent breakup with your cheating ex.

"honey, you need to forget him, at least just for tonight! look around you, that guy over there has been eyeing you for a while. why don't i hold your drink so you can say hi to him?" one exclaimed, and the others cheered in agreement.

at first, you were reluctant, continuing to plant your back against the back of the couch as if glued to it. but, glass by glass, the alcohol lowers your inhibitions and ability to think rationally. you then slam the glass on the table and approach the brunette with confidence, your friends' cheers ringing out behind you.

so why is it that when you wake up in a strange room - with strange walls and an even stranger bed - the man next to you is a blonde?

you would've just shrug this off and slip out of the bed like any other woman after a one-night stand if he was someone else. but, you recognize that face everywhere - that stubbled jaw and inked left arm peeking out from under the covers. simon riley, SpecGru's top defender.

this must be a dream, you think. this must be some weird, absurd dream you harvested after spending too much time in front of your laptop browsing about him outside of his athletic abilities (whether he's actually single, dating rumors, or some secret Instagram account he has). cause, honestly? out of all the pretty guys in SpecGru, simon is the one who catches your eye.

you slap yourself lightly, intending to wake yourself up from this too-good-to-be-true dream. one slap. two slaps. and the third one is so hard that the said man shifts and grumbles in his sleep. before you can get out of bed, he opens his eyes and looks at you confused.

"uh.. hi," you try, wincing at your own nervousness. "i'm.. well, i'll be going now."

you don't give simon time to respond because the next thing you know, you're already gathering your clothes and heading out of the five-star hotel room.

and of course. of course simon has to give you a "souvenir". cause two months after, you're sitting on the toilet with a positive pregnancy test. you've had your suspicions, but now that you have proof to hold, the fear creeps into your spine.

the cost of living alone is enough to put a dent in your bank account, let alone having a baby? with the father somewhere far and you can only see him on television every time he plays at the hockey rink.

yet, turns out, SOMEHOW, simon isn't as far away as you thought.

two weeks in limbo considering what to do, your boss assigns you to cover this sport lunch event at a hotel. his briefing is short, but you don't think anything of it. probably because you already have a lot on your plate. besides, going means more bonuses for you to receive.

but boy, it's a disaster at first sight.

simon fucking riley is there, with a few of his teammates. his presence is hard to avoid as he stands like a fucking mammoth in the room. you're smaller than him, so you hope, pray to god and the gods in the sky that your size makes it hard for him to spot you (if he even remembers you).

misplaced optimism, apparently. because firstly, simon has the eyes of an eagle. and secondly, for some reason, he remembers you (or even remembers everyone he's ever slept with? you wonder what he's got stacked up in his hippocampus.)

fucking eggs. the second you smell it, you feel your breakfast kicking, wanting to breach your throat. you excuse yourself, walking briskly towards where the toilets are probably located. out of the corner of your eye, you see simon get up from his chair, but you couldn't care less when you're at risk of staining the expensive marble.

"ma'am?" a deep voice called out to you. simon. you felt the stomach acid reaching the tip of your throat now.

to make the day better, this stupid hallway is too long, and simon turns out to be quite determined in his pursuit. when he grabs your hand, you turn to him and-

you stained his armani suit with your vomit. his face was twisted in disgust mixed with shock, but his grip on you didn't loosen. drawing a conclusion, simon knew what this was all about.

well, at least you don't have to worry about the marble now.

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[hrefna-the-raven]

Promise

Horror masterlist - Masterlist - Misc. masterlist

RZ Michael Myers x female nurse reader

Words: 1296

Warnings: strangely none (considering that it's a Myers oneshot^^)

Notes: this has been sitting in my drafts for 3 months now and I still feel weird for posting it, I personnally don't like this oneshot but maybe someone out there might enjoy it, so here you go 😊

Summary: you seem to be the only person who's able to communicate with Michael

Reader: short female reader in mind, but no specific descriptions are used

"These eyes will deceive you. They will destroy you. They will take from you your innocence, your pride, and eventually your soul. These eyes do not see what you and I see. Behind these eyes one finds only blackness, the absence of light."

Those were Doctor Loomis' words about the most feared patient within Smith's Grove Sanitarium and everyone agreed...everyone except you. That's why you found yourself in the middle of the observation room, with Michael towering over you. You were waiting for the doctor to arrive, alone except for the guards outside who kept a vigilant watch on the two of you through the door's window. You should have been afraid of him but you weren't as you were probably the only human being within these walls who saw something else within Michael's eyes, a bittersweet sadness you were all too familiar with. You gestured for him to sit down, he hesitated for a moment before complying. Even while sitting, he still loomed over you, so you approached him cautiously, careful not to make any sudden movements.

"May I touch it?", you asked in a soft voice, settling yourself in front of him while pointing at his mask, "I promise I won't remove it. It's just...beautiful...and I'd like to get a closer look."

His icy blue eyes gazed at you, displaying a faint hint of contemplation, yet without uttering a single word or making any movement. You waited patiently, but since there was no response after a minute, you made the decision to proceed. Your delicate fingers grazed over the papier-mâché mask, brushing away a few strands of his long blond hair and delicately tucking them behind his ear. His breath hitched the moment you briefly touched his skin and a grin spread across your lips. Your hand now found his head, patting it sweetly while humming a happy melody. His breaths grew heavier and his head tilted, leaning in against your touch. Your gaze shifted from his disheveled hair to his eyes, and you found yourself getting lost in the dilated pupils that slowly engulfed the blue around them. Beneath the darkness of murder and madness, there still existed a little boy who longed for love, family, or even just a simple human connection.

"Nurse!"

The metallic clanking of the opening door and Loomis' voice startled you and your hand instinctively retreated as your eyes wandered to the doctor.

"You're needed elsewhere, I'll take it from here", he said softly yet assertively, taking a seat in front of Michael.

As you tried to turn around, you sensed a firm grasp on your wrist. Michael's fingers were wrapped around it tightly, keeping you in place as his pleading eyes found yours. Despite the intensity of his grip and the fact that he had already taken the life of a nurse, you felt an overwhelming sense of tranquility. Leaning closer to him, you gently attempted to pry his fingers away from your wrist.

"I'll be back as soon as I can", you whispered, a smile gracing your lips, "I'll drop by your room if it's too late, I promise."

Finally, he released his hold on you, and for a fleeting moment, a glimmer of hope flickered in his eyes, his hand rising slowly to wave at you. It didn't feel right to leave, but there was no other choice. As the door closed behind you, you stole one last glance through the window, your heart heavy at the sight of Michael's lingering gaze while Loomis scribbled something down in his notebook almost frantically.

It was finally the end of your shift but as you changed out of your uniform, your thoughts drifted back to Michael, the commitment you had made hanging over you like a menacing shadow. Hanging the uniform in your locker, you made your way through the hallways.

"Aren't you supposed to be home by now?", Cruz asked, mopping the floor around Michael's room.

"Yes but I made a promise", you replied, offering him a polite smile as you paused at the door, gently knocking and waiting.

Despite not being alone, the hallway felt eerie. The dirty white walls seemed to stretch out into an infinite torment as your gaze wandered down to the floor, all the way to the end. A sudden thud at the door made you jump, eyes darting towards the barred window where you discovered Michael peering back at you through his mask. As your heartbeat calmed down a bit, the corners of your mouth turned into a gentle smile and you placed a hand on the side of the window.

"See? I promised you I'd be back."

Cruz chuckled and stepped up beside you, slowly unlocking the door.

"Be careful", he whispered, twisting the key in the lock, "he's dangerous but I still believe it would be more personal and easier to greet him without the barrier of a solid metal door. Saw you two this afternoon, I believe it'll do Mikey some good, if you're good to him, he's good to you...in his own way."

With an encouraging smile, he pushed open the door and stepped aside. Michael remained motionless, his eyes fixed on your form as you cautiously entered his room. A gasp escaped your lips when you beheld the walls adorned with the many masks he had crafted over the past fifteen years. It felt surreal, like you'd just fell into another, darker, realm of mysteries and twisted wonders. Tentatively, you took a few steps closer, running your fingers along one of the masks hanging just above his desk. It stood inbetween all the colours as jt was painted all in white with cut-out eyes and a subtle dark gray line at the bottom resembling lips while the top was made of different black papier-mâché strands which gave the face less of a creepy and more of that weird out-of-bed hair look, eliciting a small giggle from you. Before you could react, a hand reached over your shoulder, plucking the mask from the wall and presenting it to you. You took it, careful to not damage it and turned around, your fingers nervously toyed with the loose coloured paper strands.

"For me?", you asked almost in a whisper.

Michael simply nodded and walked back to his bed, sitting down on the edge. You weren't sure if you should say or do anything else. The bond that was forming between the two of you was unusual and extraordinary. The silent killer and his nurse, an unexpected connection that blossomed like a foreign flower in the midst of a desert. 

"I...uh...need to get home now but I'll see you tomorrow", you offered him a smile, "and thanks for this. I love it and it'll get a special place at home."

You held up the mask before turning away, walking past Cruz who locked the door once again.

"I don't understand what it is with you but Mikey likes you, usually no one is allowed to touch anything in that room, not even me."

"Well maybe it's because I see a bit more in him than just the mindless killer everyone else believes him to be", you shrugged your shoulders, heading down the hallway with Cruz following behind you.

You felt his hand on your shoulder, forcing you to stop just as you were about to pass the last door of this floor.

"Whatever you see in him, don't forget what he has done", Cruz urged, "for your own sake."

The warden's words carried a subtle acknowledgement of the harsh reality, yet they were delivered with a touch of kindness. He seemed to be the only other person, apart from you, in this place who believed that there was more to Michael than just brutality and an unnerving silence.

Part 2 - Mask

[wooahaes]

out for delivery

pairing: none? non-idol!svt with a mention of gn!reader

prompt: that one post i made about reader asking for them to send their cutest delivery guy

genre: comedy. this is just silly stuff teehee

word count: 1.4k~

warnings: food mentions. svt arguing about who is the cutest. i didnt proofread this at all btw its just supposed to be silly goofy fun.

daisy’s notes: this has been in my drafts for over two months.

Junhui was the one who read off your order to the others, only to stop when he saw the special instruction in the delivery spot: send ur cutest guy, pls. 

Of course, being someone with access to the internet, Jun had heard of this kind of thing before. People who throw in instructions like that for fun, or people who ask for things to be drawn on their to-go boxes (he always did those when they popped up--his art skills might not be perfect, but he can draw a little cat saying ‘enjoy your food!’ any day), or sometimes the occasional message from someone to another (the ‘person loves you’ or ‘person says to get well soon’ kind of deal). But this? Here? Well...

“Which one of us is the cutest?” He mused aloud, catching Jeonghan’s attention as he stepped away from the kitchen to wipe the sweat off his brow.

“What?”

Jun nodded toward the screen and your specific instruction. “They asked for a cute delivery guy. Who’s working today?”

Jeonghan paused, musing on the question. “Soonyoung, Wonwoo, Vernon,” he listed off, although he continued to wrack his brain to see if that Namjoon guy was in as well. Nah--Maybe on the weekend when they’re busier and need the extra hands, but three already is kind of overkill as it is.

(Not that any of them are complaining, that is: they’re still getting some sort of payment for all of this.)

“It doesn’t say cutest delivery guy,” Jeonghan said. “Just our cutest guy.”

Seungcheol looked up from his clipboard as he came back, brow raised. “Me?”

Jeonghan scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Obviously, I’m the cutest one here. I’ll make it.”

It was at this point that they’d started gathering the attention of everyone currently in (which, today, had been everyone except for Soonyoung, who was still out on a delivery across the city).

Seungcheol stared at him, “You don’t work delivery--”

“So?” Jeonghan said. “I don’t mind going--”

“You don’t, either,” Jun piped up. “I could run if I need to--”

Seungkwan was finally the one to speak up, “What are you talking about?”

For a moment, the three said nothing. If everyone got into this conversation, it’d be an all-out bloodbath, especially with Seungkwan taking part. Yet Wonwoo, who had been sitting nearby, enjoying his few minutes of rest after his own series of deliveries, looked up.

“Someone asked for a cute delivery guy, and they’re debating about it,” he shrugged, looking back at his phone--although the tiny smile on his face was still evident. The rotten fucker--

“I can go,” Joshua spoke up, as if he wasn’t literally working on your order alongside Mingyu. “Just gimme a sec, I’ll change shirts.”

Seokmin, who had been busy rolling out pizza dough, looked up. “Is this really a debate? I think we all know I’m the cutest one here...”

“Both of you work in the kitchens,” Seungcheol said, “you can’t leave.”

“All of us are in today, and it’s slow right now,” Chan said, already washing his hands of flour, ready to remove his apron in a moment. “You guys won’t miss me.”

“Who said you were going?!” Seungkwan whipped around, “If anyone goes, it should be me! Everyone who comes in tells points out how cute I am!”

Mingyu looked up, a cocky smile tugging at his lips. “Who gets asked out the most here?”

Silence. The motherfucker...

And then Minghao looked up. “They said cutest. Not hottest. Which eliminates all of you--”

“I’m very cute!” Seungkwan huffed, “That’s why it should be me.”

Vernon looked up from his phone, yet another delivery boy who probably should just take the order when it’s ready. “I dunno. I think I’m pretty cute. I could do it. Plus,” he shrugged, “kind of my job--”

“You’re hot and you know it,” Jeonghan spoke up. “Hao has a point. They requested the cutest guy--which means it’s down to Seungkwan, Chan, and I.”

Minghao scoffed, rolling up his sleeves. “Just you three?”

Mingyu had thrown an arm around Jihoon’s shoulders, dragging him from his quiet spot of observation straight into the conversation. “Jihoon should be included, too.”

“Oh? What if this person flirts with him?” Jeonghan chuckled. “They’re paying in cash and Jihoon would probably walk off without it.”

Jihoon’s face turned red. “I’m not that bad--”

“You almost did it last time you had to work the window.”

“They were too upfront!” Jihoon huffed, his face slowly turning red. “If they had said to you what they said to me, you’d run, too! That’s why Jun had to take over!”

“They said you had pretty eyes!”

Jihoon’s face burned with embarrassment. “It was the way they said it...”

As if in his own world, Jun quietly mused aloud, “I think I’m pretty cute,” as he continued looking over the order again.

“And if Jun’s cute, then I’m cute.” Joshua wiped his hands down his apron, turning back. “Jun, does the order say anything else?”

He shook his head. The only note you had put in was the note they were debating about now: send ur cutest guy, pls. Nothing more, nothing less. Hell, none of them even knew why you’d asked for their cutest guy. Was it a joke? Were you kind of desperate for something? Was this going to be the really bad intro to a porno? The questions persisted.

Seungcheol had been the one who pulled your pizza from the oven when it was time, boxing it up and carefully sealing it. “Who’s delivering it?”

Immediately, several people had volunteered.

He rolled his eyes. “Wonwoo, Vernon--”

“I’ll do it,” Seungkwan insisted further. “They asked for someone cute!”

Vernon raised his brows. “Dude, what the hell--”

“You know you’re hot, shut up.” Seungkwan turned. “If they want someone cute, then it’s only between a few of us. Not including Jeonghan.”

Jeonghan gasped, turning around as he pressed a hand to his chest. “I’m angelic--”

“That’s a lie and you know it!”

The bell chimed as Soonyoung made his way in, going completely ungreeted as the conversation continued. He looked to Wonwoo, who merely shrugged in exchange before watching as Minghao began to make the very well formulated argument that he was the cutest (his fairy-like giggle was direct proof, in his own words--the others called him cute all the time for it). Which caused Seungcheol to argue back that if he was including laughs as evidence, then his own could count because plenty of people found it endearing. Soonyoung said nothing, walking over to where the orders were as he began looking through them for another delivery since his break would come later tonight.

“I’m not saying your laugh isn’t cute,” Seungcheol said, “I’m saying you can’t use it as proof when all of us have cute laughs!”

“Some of you sound like a hyena,” Minghao rolled his eyes, “and some of you are too ‘hot’ to be cute! You talk about how handsome you are all the time--”

“Stop, you’ll make him pout,” Jeonghan chuckled from nearby, “and then he’ll really start insisting he’s the cutest of us.”

The bell chimed again, and Jun merely glanced up to see that it was only Soonyoung leaving. He turned back. “People tell me I’m cute. I’m carefree.”

“Childish cute doesn’t count,” Seungkwan said, lips pursed. “I’m cute because of my mannerisms.”

“The same mannerisms you get mad at Soonyoung for imitating,” Seokmin muttered under his breath, only to earn a deadly glare from Seungkwan. “You do!”

Wonwoo looked back down at his phone, wondering if he should have been recording this entire conversation. “I think I’m cute.”

“One of us has to go,” Joshua spoke up, “before their food gets cold. And I think I should do it because I’ll be the fastest--”

“Dude,” Vernon looked up. “I’m pretty fast on my bike.”

“It’s a bike, we’d all be fast  on it,” Minghao scoffed. “Why aren’t one of them doing it?” Minghao gestured toward Wonwoo and Vernon. “They’re the delivery boys!”

“Still on break,” Wonwoo said without looking up, “for another few minutes.” 

Seungcheol opened his mouth to say something--probably about how one of their breaks had already ended by now.

“Also, Soonyoung just left with it,” Wonwoo added casually enough.

Immediately, several pairs of eyes went to where the order had been left... and sure enough, it was gone.

And then chaos ensued, and Wonwoo hid yet another smile as he listened to several people bemoan that little factoid. Yet Soonyoung was pedaling away, completely lost as to what had gone down while he was gone.

(And when he showed up, bragging about the huge tip that you had given him while laughing about the fact the others had been arguing... Well. They knew what was going to happen the next time you threw in that special request.)

taglist: @twancingyunhao​ @synthetickitsune​ @gyulbabie​ @wonuziex​

[jeankluv]

Finding you || Jean Kirstein x f!oc

Words: 5,8k

Warnings: fluff, canon & post canon, some angst, spoilers for aot, the female character has a name but her appearance is never described, Jean’s pov mainly.

Summary: Jean never believed in love at first sight, it wasn’t until she appeared on his life

Notes: This is a story that has been on my drafts for over a year now, and I decided to finish it as a goodbye to one of my favorite characters, Jean Kirstein.

Materialist

Months passed by and no info about Eren was found. It was like he disappeared completely. While they searched for him they also investigated Marley and the world, that was the mission they had until some news from Eren came.

As usual Jean woke up early in the morning, he went to the kitchen of the apartment he was staying in, none of the group were staying in the same place but they were close to each other just in case. He prepared himself the usual breakfast and once he was done, he went to buy the newspaper. It was something he always did, that way he could recollect information for the group. He walked down the streets of the city, it was early in the morning so there weren't a lot of people around, just the ones on their way to their work.

He arrived at the store where he always bought the newspaper. He smiled at the owner and paid for it. He starts walking to a nearby coffee shop, so he can get coffee while reading the newspaper. That’s until he bumps into a girl, way smaller than her, and she falls to the floor. Jean looks at her and tries to help her stand but, she is faster, and pulls Jean to her and stamps her lips against his.

Jean doesn’t move and his eyes are wide open. He hears some people running behind them, searching for someone. That’s when the girl separates from him and looks around. Once she makes sure no one is around, she tries to run away once again.

“Hey!” Jean stops her. She tries to free her but Jean is way stronger. “Hey! Stop!”

And she stopped. “What?” She said with an angry look, looking at Jean.

“What? You just bumped into me and then kissed me. And now you want to leave without any explanations?” He said looking at her and crossing his arms.

“Yes, any problem big boy?” Jean smirked, she really is something.

“Those people… were searching for you?” He said pointing to the direction where they went.

She looked in that direction. “Why do you care?”

“Well… maybe I can help you.”

“You already did that.” She said and tried to leave but Jean grabbed her once again. “You don’t know me… so why do you care so much?”

“Because… maybe I don’t know your situation but you seem desperate and maybe I can help you.”

She laughed. “If you knew what I am you wouldn’t be here, you wouldn’t be touching me or you wouldn’t even want to breathe the same air as me.”

Jean didn’t respond this time, something clicks in his head. Could she be a eldian too? So those people probably knew about her being an eldian and were trying to catch her and who knows what to do to her. This makes his blood boil, why it’s the outside world like this with them? He comes back to his senses, just to find that she is gone.

“Damn it!” He started ñ walking trying to find her but she is gone. Just like she appeared, she is gone.

Frustrated, he started walking back home. He really hoped the girl would be okay.

“Jean!” He heard his name being shouted by no other than the two most scandalous people on earth.

“You two really can’t keep a low profile, don’t you?”

Both made a sad face. “C’mon Jean boy, don’t be mad.”

“Don’t call me that!”

“Now who is making a scene?” Asks Sasha laughing.

Jean lets out a sigh and keeps walking, followed by Connie and Sasha who are talking about going to the cinema, since finding out about it the whole group has been fascinated with it. The three of them arrived at the place where they usually met to talk about the things that they learned. The rest were already there, so they all sit around the table to talk. The reunion ends up with not much info or new clues.

“You seemed distracted.” Armin said. “You didn’t say a word during the whole time. What’s on your head Jean?”

“It’s nothing Armin, I was just tired.”

“You went out last night again? You know that if captain…”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Hey man. You know that if something is going on, you can talk. Right?”Jean nods and drinks from his coffee cup.

“Jean, are you coming to the cinema tonight?” Asked Connie.

“Yeah… sure why not?”

“Brats remember to be careful.” Captain Levi spoke looking at the group.

The whole group nodded after hearing their captain's order. It was early to go to the cinema, so they decided to hang out and enjoy their time together, pretending to be normal and not soldiers from the devils of the island. The five of them were on a bar drinking and enjoying the day. It really seemed like nothing changed, like they were still in their cadets day. Like all their commanders were still alive. It was nice, it was warm to see them happy, that’s what Jean was thinking while looking at his friends.

“Oi Jean!!” Screamed Connie into his ear.

“Are you dumb or something?!”

“I have been calling for you for the last 5 minutes.” Jean rolled his eyes.

“What do you want?”

“Ask for another round!” He said, raising his glass.

“Connie, if you keep drinking you want to be alright to watch the film.” Spoke Armin this time.

“C’mon Armin! We are young! Let’s enjoy ourselves! Right girls?” He said looking at Mikasa and Sasha, who until a few moments ago they were talking with each other.

“Yes, let's go, Armin!” Sasha screamed this time and Mikasa laughed at her friend's reactions.

Armin sighted, knowing it was a lost battle. “Alright, let’s have another round. Jean could…”

“Sure, I will buy another round.” He said standing and going to ask for another round. “The same as…”

“Disgusting eldian!” A man shouted, the whole group froze in place. “I’m calling the police! They have been searching for you right?”

Jean turned around to look at the place where everything was happening. There she was, the girl from the morning.

“Is she one of the devils?” A woman asked.

“Yes, this morning police were chasing her, and now she was trying to buy something here at my shop, pretending to be one of us!”

People started surrounding her and calling her disgusting names. Jean clenched his fists and tried to go to her.

“Jean… what are you doing?” Said Armin while holding him by the arm.

“We can’t leave her, she needs help!

“We can’t. If we do something they will suspect us.” Sasha spoke this time.

“I can’t do that! Sorry…” He said ignoring his friends.

He was being selfish, he was putting all his friends in danger and for what? For a girl that he met that same morning. What was he thinking? I must be going crazy. He pushed some people aside, to get where she was.

“You think a garbage like you, can keep escaping?! Oh no! You will go back to where you belong! Stupid slut!” The man said, grabbing her by the hair.

“Please… stop…” She said with hot tears rolling down her face.

“No you beg for mer…” Jean didn’t really think before punching the man in the face.

People gasped in shock and the face of his friends went completely blank.

“You…” The man said. “Who do you think you are?”

“I hope you can run. Because we are leaving right now.” Jean whispered to the girl, who stood next to Jean.

“Hey! I’m talking to you! Why are you defending that evil?” The man shouted. ”Don’t tell me… you are also one of them?”

Jean grabbed her hand tightly, she looked at him. “Now!”

And both started running, as fast they could, ignoring anyone that shouted for them to stop. They kept running for a little while more, until it was safe no one was following them. Jean stopped and tried to catch his air again. He looked at her and saw her down on her knees facing the floor. She looked so small, fragile, different to that same morning.

“Hey.” Jean kneeled in front of her. “You okay?”

No response came from her, she didn’t even look at him. Jean sighted and stood back, looking around once again, making sure no one was near.

“We need to…”

“Why did you help me?” Her voice came out, almost as a whisper. “Now,…. Now you’ll be in danger because you helped me.”

“Because I wanted to.” Jean said, looking at her.

“Because you wanted to?” She stood facing him. “Are you completely insane?!”

“Maybe I am but what I did, it’s my problem.” He got closer to her. “Now, come with me. We need to treat those wounds you have.” He said touching her cheek where there was a wound.

“I can treat myself.” She said, moving away from his touch. “You don’t have to do anything more for me.” Jean rolled his eyes.

“You know what?” He said, focusing his eyes on her once again. “I don’t care, you are coming with me, I’m treating that wound of yours, then you will take a shower and eat something. You get it?”

“But… you’re so stubborn.” She said pressing her lips together, making a thin line. “What if you’re a pervert?”

“Would you believe me if I said I’m not?”

“No.”

“Then you will have to trust me. I won’t do anything to you, I just want you to be okay. That’s all.”

“You don’t even know my name. Why are you doing this?”

“Because it’s the right thing to do.” Then he looked at the left. “He would have done the same.” His words came out as whispered, difficult to hear but she did hear them.

She remained silent, looking now at his back. Why is he really helping me? She wondered.

She ended up accepting, because it really seems like he is worried and wants to help her. They both walk side by side, going through the less crowded streets to avoid suspicious people. None of them says anything, he just keeps walking, being followed by her. They both walked for a few more minutes until they arrived at the building where they entered. He must live here.

“You can make yourself comfortable.” He says letting her enter the place.

She nods and enters, the place feels comfortable and warm.

“I will go for the things to treat your cheek… you can take whatever you want from the kitchen.” He says pointing to the kitchen.

“Thank you…” She said and before he leaves she warns him. “And don’t forget, I won’t hesitate on killing you if you try something.”

He laughs and leaves the room. That girl…

“Captain Levi is going to kill me after he finds out what I did.” He spoke to himself while searching for the stuff. “Fuck, I really fucked up this time.” He sighed and grabs the kit from the shelves.

Jean made his way back to the living room and there she is, sleeping.

“I can’t believe her.” He whispered with a smile on his face. “You really fall asleep in a strangers place?” He sayid knowing no one will answer him.

He gets closer to her and looks at her face. She looks so peaceful like that. He shook those thoughts out of it.

“Hey stubborn girl.” He shook her.

She woke up startled and ready to punch him on the face. If it wasn’t because Jean had fast reflexes, he would’ve probably ended up with a purple eye.

“Hey! Easy.” Jean said, still holding her hand.

“Shit.” She said and took her away from Jean’s. “I fell asleep… fuck.” She whispered.

“It’s okay. You looked tired anyways.” Jean tried to calm her down.

“It’s not okay… I was reckless and I shouldn’t get so comfortable with someone I don’t know.”

“My name is Jean.”

“Why are you telling me your name?”

“You said you didn’t know me, well I’m introducing myself.” He gave her a faint smile.

“Still… you could…”

“I could what? Listen, I’m not going to give you in alright?”

“I… I can not believe that, you marleians, you lie so easily. You probably made a call when I fell asleep and the police are already coming for me.” She stood and started walking around the room.

Jean could see how her body was shaking from fear of the possible outcomes. He knew that telling her his real identity was risky, hell it was so fucking risky but he needed to tell her. Jean stood from the sofa and took her by the arm, making her stop walking. The stubborn, angry, defensive girl was nowhere to be seen at that moment, everything Jean could see right there was a scary, vulnerable girl.

“Please… I know I was rude and an asshole. But let me go… I… I need to go back home, please.” She started to silently cry. “I swear I will never come back, you will never see me again. I swear but please let me go.”

“Hey please calm down.” Jean tried to comfort her. “I’m not turning you in. I am… I am also an Eldian okay?”

She looked at him, shocked. What was he saying? No no no no if he was an eldian too, it meant he was also risking his life? Why? Why?

“Hey.” Jean spoke again. “Stop overthinking.”

“Why would you do what you did, you idiot?” She said and punched him on the chest.

“Here she is again.”

“Don’t laugh, why are you laughing idiot. You’re fucking risking your life for a stranger like me. I don’t understand, I truly don’t. Is it because I kissed you? You’re one of those perverts? But fuck… if they find out not only you are helping me but that you are also an Eldian, they will kill you and all because of me… Again, it’s happening again.”

Jean saw how something broke on her after the last sentence. She fell to the floor, crying and repeating, it’s happened again, again. He didn’t know what to do, he wanted to make her feel safe, to make her understand that nothing was going to happen to her or him, that whatever she was thinking was not going to happen. He kneeled in front of her and embraced her, she tensed at first but then she continued sobbing into his chest.

“I’m sorry…” Jean heard her whisper.

“Listen, angry girl. Nothing is going to happen to me or to you. I promise.”

“Don’t do that…” She said. “Don’t make promises you won’t be able to keep. Please.” She looked at him, still with tears rolling down her face.

“I will try my best to keep the promise…” He said, whipping her tears away. “Now, let me treat your wound.”

She nodded and sat next to Jean on the sofa. Jean put the kit on the table and took out the necessary stuff he needed to treat her wound. He had treated thousands of wounds since he joined the survey corps years ago, he knew how to do it but this time was afraid of hurting her. The wound wasn’t really that big but still he didn’t want her to suffer anymore. Once he was done he put everything back on the bag and turned around to look at her once again. Her eyes were still red and so was her nose.

“You want to eat something?”

“No. I really need to leave and go back home.” She said not looking at Jean.

“It’s already dark outside, it will be dangerous if someone sees you alone at night.”

“It’s… it’s okay, it wouldn’t be the first time I sneak out in the middle of the night.”

Jean thought for a moment. “I will go with you.”

“Wait… no no, you already did enough.” She stood following Jean’s footsteps. “You saved my ass twice today and you’re an Eldian too, it would be dangerous if a police stopped us and they asked us for our documents. We would be…”

“Hey.” He turned around and looked at her eyes. “Trust me okay? It will be alright, I will take you home, safe and sound.”

She stayed silent, observing each one of his movements and trying to understand why that man, named Jean and an Eldian like her, was helping her. No Eldian is willing to help another one if it means risking the little freedom they have and yet, the man she had in front of her was risking everything for her, someone who was an asshole that treated him poorly since the first minutes their destinies crossed paths.

“For more that I try to understand, I just can’t comprehend why are you doing all this.”

“Maybe you enchanted me with that kiss.” Jean passed next to her with a smirk on his face.

“Now you’re flirting? Is that what you want from me? To fuck me?” She angrily asked.

“Wait no no no no.” Jean shook his head. “Don’t get me wrong okay? It’s true that I couldn’t get the kiss out of my head, because it took me by surprise but I’m not doing this because I want to fuck you. I’m doing this because I think you desperately need someone to give you a hand. I’m sorry if that made you feel uncomfortable.”

“Okay… sorry it’s just that… it’s not easy.”

“To trust someone?”

“Yeah…”

“I understand but try to trust me okay.” She nodded, still hesitant but with a feeling in her chest that made her believe his words. “Okay, put this on, it will be cold outside and like that we can cover you up, so those assholes don’t recognize you.” He grabbed the jacket and gave it to her, it smelled like him. “It looks gigant on you.”

“Maybe because you’re like two meters tall?” She said looking at the jacket and then at him.

“Almost two meters.” She rolled her eyes and tried to hide the smile on her face.

“Idiot…”

“You know, you can call me by my name, Jean. And by the way, you still haven't told me yours.”

“That’s right but I’m not telling you. Not yet.”

“And what should I call you then?” He tilted his head.

She was about to respond when a knock on the door made her freeze. She could feel her whole body trembling. Did he lie to you? It was the police, he called them?

“Look at me.” And she did, those honey eyes were looking at her and for some reason she knew right there, that he didn’t call them, that he didn’t lie and that she could believe him. “It’s probably my neighbor, so don’t worry, okay?” She nodded and watched him walk to the door.

She saw how he smiled to the person on the other side of the door and how politely talked to them.

“Jean, I heard a woman's voice earlier, are you finally settling down?” Jean laughed, he wished he could but in his position it was impossible.

“It’s not like that Miss Aldrich.”

“C’mon! Let me meet the girl.” Jean tried to stop her.

“Miss Aldrich I don’t think that’s a good idea, she…” C’mon Jean think about something.

“Oh I get it, yeah you two were having fun, alright Jean boy, I will leave you. Hopefully this old building will soon have new people.” And she left.

Jean sighed in relief, he loved Miss Aldrich and was a good woman but he couldn’t risk anything at that moment.

“Bee.” Jean heard from the other side of the room.

“What?”

“Call me Bee.”

Jean nodded at Bee and she gave him a faint smile. Bee didn’t know why she was willing to tell him her name but something inside her told her to do it, that it was okay.

“Okay, Bee. We should get going, so you can go back home.” Bee looked at him, he was offering his hand. “It will be easier if we pretend that we are a couple, if they stop us I will just show my ID.”

“But you…” She wanted to tell him if he was insane, if he lost his mind. But Jean winked an eye at her, making her heart race.

“I have a fake one, don’t worry, okay?”

“Okay…”

Bee held his hand and they both got out of the apartment. Jean held her tightly but gently, afraid of hurting her, afraid of someone taking her away. They needed to be careful, but the night was already coming so it was going to be easier for them to go unnoticed.

They walked the streets, like a normal couple would do, not making themselves notice. It wouldn’t be true to say Jean’s heart wasn’t racing like crazy, he was nervous about the possibility of getting caught and holding Bee’s hand wasn’t something that was helping. He couldn’t deny that she was beautiful, breathtaking to be more exact. But he couldn’t think about her that way, no, he needed to take her to her home and then hope she would be able to live a normal life, while he kept searching for Eren. That’s what was going to happen and they wouldn’t see each other anymore.

Bee moved beside Jean, guiding him in the direction of her house. From time to time she would look at him, he was serious, looking around, making sure no one would come for her and not letting her hand go. It made her feel secure, protected, something she hadn’t felt in a very long time. It almost made her cry in that instant.

Both of them kept walking for a little longer, leaving the most crowded streets behind, almost leaving the city behind. Bee stopped when they reached a small neighborhood, with old houses and almost no light.

“It’s here…” She said letting Jean’s hand go, feeling emptiness when she did it.

“Oh…” Jean looked around and nodded. “Alright…” he swallowed.

“I guess… it's a goodbye.”

“I guess so.” Jean played with his feet. “Are you sure you will be alright?” He looked at her with worried eyes.

Bee swallowed and blinked, trying not to throw herself to him and cry saying that nothing would be alright, that she was afraid and ask him again why everyone viewed them as monsters, why couldn’t see feel safe like she did with him. But she didn’t and she simply smiled at him.

“I will be. Thank you again.”

Jean nodded and they both stayed looking at each. Jean knew he should turn around and walk away, forget about her, forget about that whole day, go back to his life but something wasn’t letting him move, he couldn’t, he didn’t want to move away.

“I think… I will be heading home.” She whispered and started to walk away.

“Wait!” Jean held her hand and made her turn around. “If you… if you ever need anything, just look out for me okay?” She nodded. “Jean Kirstein.”

“I will Jean. Thank you…”

And with that, they both walked away, with a heavy heart and the feeling of a missing piece on it. They met for less than 24 hours but none of them wanted to leave each other. Bee for a moment considered going back to him, asking him to take her away from that place, for them to pretend they were monsters but she couldn’t do that to someone she hardly knew but desperately wanted to know. Jean on the other hand, would have everything for her, for a girl that cornered him, the girl that was so stubborn, the girl that despite looking so strong was so broken, if she only asked to.

But they didn’t say anything and they both saw each other for the last time that night. Bee kept surviving and trying not to get caught, while Jean kept searching for Eren and distracting himself so he wouldn’t think about her.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

It was April, Jean’s birthday, thinking about it he never thought he would make it to his 20s after joining the survey corps. But there he was in a small bar near the refugee camp with Connie, drinking beer and chatting. After the Rumbling and everything falling apart live has been going too fast, it seemed like they couldn’t stop for a single moment, the attack on Liberio, then the rumbling, then helping those who were still alive, try to find peace. Hell they didn’t even properly mourn Sasha, Hange or even Eren, like they deserved, back then. He didn’t even have time to try and reach his mom and let her know that he was alright. He even thought about Bee, did she make it through the rumbling? Was she saved?

Although he met her for less than 24 hours, her memory was still on his head and he wished he could see her once again, at least to know she was okay.

He turned around to look at Connie, who was heavily drunk and dancing, although there was no music on. Jean smirked, he was grateful he had Connie with him and to have these stupid moments with him.

“C’mon Connie, let’s go home.” Jean stood and held Connie’s arm.

“Why? C’mon Jeanboy! It’s your birthday! You are entering your 20s, let’s celebrate it!” Connie went to the dance floor once again, ignoring Jean and forgetting about everything.

Jean sat back on his seat and sighed looking at his best friend. It was good that at least Connie was enjoying himself, but it was going to be a pain in the ass bringing him back home.

He simply stayed there, looking at his best friend, while with each drink he wandered in his thoughts. Two hours later they were kicked out of the place. Jean didn't think he was completely drunk, but his head hurt and he knew that tomorrow would be a hard day. He grabbed Connie's arm and dragged him to the place they now called home.

“You seemed to need help.” A female voice spoke, while Jean was trying to open the door.

“It’s okay, I can do it.” Jean responded without looking at the woman standing next to him.

“Let me help you.” She said and took Jean’s keys from his hands. “I own you one.” She whispered.

Jean blinked, trying to focus his gaze on the woman but he couldn't, everything was double for him.

“I don’t think… I don’t know.”

“It’s okay Jean… hopefully tomorrow you will feel better.” Jean saw how she started to walk away. “I’m glad you’re alive Jean.”

And with that the woman went away, leaving Jean confused and with Connie already sleeping on the floor. He moved him and started walking to their dorms, kicking Connie into his dorm and letting him fall on the couch. He covered his face with his arms, trying to make the headache stop but it was useless. He once again tried to think about the woman, tried to remember her face, but it was impossible, his vision had been too blurry, but something in her voice had seemed familiar. Jean finally fell asleep on the couch and it wasn't until the next morning that he woke up due to Armin waking him up.

“You should try and sleep on your own bed.” Was the first thing Armin had told him.

“Mhmm… I know mom.” Jean grunted, scratching the back of his neck. “Fuck my head hurts.”

“No wonder why, you and Connie had some fun last night.” He said, giving him a cup of water.

“Not every day you turn 20 you know?” Jean drank from the cup.

“A woman asked me about you.” Armin walked to the kitchen.

Jean blinked and stood up, following him. “A woman?”

“Yeah… she asked me about you this morning.”

“She told you her name or something?”

“No, just asked me if I knew you.” Armin shrugged. “Did you hook up with a woman? Jean we are on diplomatic…”

“Wait what? No. No I haven’t hooked up with…”

“Jean hooked up with someone?” Connie appeared in the kitchen.

“Connie… you were literally sticking your tongue inside on everyone’s mouth last night.”

“Hey! Don’t expose me like that bro.” Connie cried.

Jean rolled his eyes. “Where did you see her?” Said looking back at Armin.

“On the market, she was shopping.”

Jean nodded and without a word he left, he started walking across the streets, looking for the girl he met in Liberio. It had to be her, it had to be Bee, she survived and she was there, looking for him. Jean kept walking, looking everywhere, but who assured him that Bee would still be in that market? He reached the end of the market without any success, sighed and ruffled his hair in frustration. He turned around and started walking in the direction of his house. Maybe today was not the day he was supposed to run into Bee, but they were both in that place so at some point they would meet.

“Hey big boy!” Jean stopped walking. “Are you sober already?”

Jean turned around and there she was. “Bee…” His feet started to move on their own and when he realized he was embracing Bee in his arms.

“Wow big boy, careful. You are much bigger than me.” She laughed.

“I’m sorry… I’m.” He broke the hug and looked at her. She was still beautiful. “You’re alive.”

“I am and so are you.” She smiled. “I heard you are some kind of hero.”

“I wouldn’t call it that. But… Bee I’m so glad to see you are okay. I…”

“Me too. I saw you a few weeks ago and felt so relieved, strange isn’t it? We met for less than 24 hours and only knew each other's names but somehow, I couldn’t keep you out of my mind and when the whole rumbling happened, I prayed to meet you again… Oh god, you must think I’m crazy or something.”

“No, no, I mean, I kinda felt the same and… maybe now we could get to know each other better. Grab some coffee or tea or whatever you want, I don’t mind. And only if you want of course.”

“Jean, are you flirting?” She raised an eyebrow without hiding her smile.

“I mean… maybe? Would you be bothered if I did?”

“No.” She shook her head. “Coffee sounds good.”

“Good. Should we go now or are you busy?”

“Now it’s alright.” She started walking.

They both started walking side by side, slowly and enjoying the sun of the day and each other’s company and presence. Jean was beyond excited and happy, to know she was okay and that she seemed happy, despite the whole world went to shit. He didn’t regret hugging her right after seeing her for the first time, he really needed to do it and it just felt right.

He never believed in those stories of someone falling in love with another one at first sight, he used to think it was unreal and stupid. That was until that day in Liberio, after weeks passed by he tried convincing himself that his stupid self only felt like that because Bee stole his first kiss, but as much as he wanted to believe it was because of the kiss that she was still on his head, he couldn’t. He really fell for her just by seeing her and spending some hours with her.

“Is this place okay for you?” She pointed.

“Yeah… it’s okay.” He nodded.

And they both sat on one of the tables of the coffee shop, Each one ordered something to drink and waited in silence until it was brought to them. Bee watched through the window at the people passing by, from one side to the other, while Jean looked at her profile and admired her beauty. He was thankful that none of her friends were around her, otherwise she knew she would have them making fun of her for days.

“So… how, how did you get out?” Bee turned to look at Jean after hearing his voice. “I mean, away from the rumbling.”

“Oh… it wasn’t easy but after that weird message, something inside of me told me we had to get the hell out of there. So we took the last train that was leaving, most people weren’t eldians so they had no clue what was going on, so it was easy to sneak into one of them. After that, when the… the titans started to show up, I prayed to be safe and we were saved. A couple of weeks later we ended up here and that’s it.”

“You said we, you weren't alone?”

“No, my nephew was with me.” She drank her coffee. “It’s just me and her now.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, if it wasn’t because you saved me that day from those people I wouldn’t have been able to go back home to her.” She smiled.

“It was nothing, really.” He shook his head. “I’m glad, both of you are okay. I need to know something, why did you risk yourself back then?”

“What do you mean?”

“When you kissed me to get away from those policemen.”

“Oh that.” She looked down and smiled. “Something told me it had to be you. I guess it was right after all.”

Bee and Jean continued talking for hours, about everyday things, Jean told her about Paradise and Bee told her about her niece, her sister. Even when Bee had to leave to look for her niece, Jean accompanied her and continued listening to each of her stories carefully, without missing any detail of what Bee told her. Upon arriving at the school where Bee's niece was, Jean stood in front of her and took a breath.

“Would you go out with me?” Jean slowly spoke, meeting her gaze. “As a date, I mean.”

Bee's heart skipped a beat and she felt butterflies fluttering in her stomach. His honey gaze made her nervous and those words were making her even more nervous. With Jean she had felt security, protection and tranquility, but she knew there had been something more and her heart beat for it, she had liked him a lot. Very much. But the thought of never even seeing him again or anything happening between them had long since disappeared. Until a week ago she saw him again and her heart raced again like that time in her apartment. Bee licked her lips and looked first at her worn shoes and then at Jean's gaze. Maybe this was the destiny telling her that finally she was going to be happy.

“I would love to.” She smiled and so did Jean.

[canirove]

The Princess & the Football Player | Chapter 1

Summary: "They say they want to make the monarchy more modern, to be closer to the people, but then your parents would prefer it if you married a guy whose Godfather is the freaking Prince of Monaco, instead of a guy from Kingston." Or the love story between Princess Eleanor, heir to the British throne, and Declan Rice, English football player. 

Author’s note: This story has been sitting on my drafts for maybe two months because I never was completely happy with it, and tbh, I still feel the same. Though sometimes those are the ones people like the most 😂 I got inspired to write it during the World Cup when people here in Spain went crazy about the idea of Princess Leonor and Gavi dating and him becoming the future King because she, apparently, is her fan and has a crush on him 😅 That's why on this story, the British Royal family has the name of the Spanish one 😁   Hope you like it, and thank you for reading! 💜

Next chapter

Masterlist

"Ok, ask me one more."

"Dad..."

"Just one more, please."

"Fine" I say, rolling my eyes. "Who is that one?" I ask, pointing at the papers he has on his hands.

"That's easy. Aaron Ramsdale, goalkeeper, plays for Arsenal."

"See? You know them all. Relax."

"I just want to do this right. You are the one into sports, not me."

"You'll be fine, you already know them all from the Euros."

"Yeah" he says, letting out a big sigh. "What about you? Are you nervous?"

"Why would I be?"

"You may be meeting one of your crushers."

"I don't have a crush on anyone on the national team."

"Oh, c'mon Eleanor. You watch all their games, you must fancy at least one of them."

"I don't" I shrug.

"Not even Mason Mount? I've heard girls think he is fit."

"That he is what?" I laugh.

"Fit. That's what Sophie says about boys who are handsome and attractive."

"Yes, Sophie. But not you."

"Why? Because I'm old?"

"No, because you are the King of England."

"Whatever" he says. "You don't like anyone, then?"

"No one. So you better not try anything or do what you did when we met One Direction years ago."

"What did I do?"

"Tell Niall Horan that I had a crush on him? That I had photos of him in my room?"

"Oh, yes" he chuckles. "But don't worry, I won't do it again. I learnt my lesson."

"You better. Just imagine that someone hears something and runs to the press with it. I can already see the headlines: Princess Eleanor in love with a football player. And they'll probably pick the worst option."

"Like Grealish."

"You said it, I didn't" I laugh.

"We've arrived, sir" our driver says.

"Good, good. Are you ready?"

"Ready" I say, taking a deep breath before we step out of the car.

As part of all the media events the national football team is doing before they travel to Canada for the World Cup, we are meeting with them to say our farewells and also give them a little something to remember the occasion. And when I say we, I mean my dad, King Philip of England, and I, Princess Eleanor, heir to the throne.

"Welcome to St. George's Park, your Royal Highness" Gareth Southgate says when we walk in. "The boys are waiting over here."

"Wonderful" my dad says. "How are they feeling?"

"Ready. They can't wait to get on that plane."

After a few words from my dad and the gaffer, it's time to give the players that little something we had for them: a shirt with their number and the name of all the players who have previously worn it.

"We'll do one each, ok?" my dad tells me.

"Ok."

We start calling each player, congratulating them and posing for a photo, everything going smoothly... until it doesn't. Until I froze in place when I find myself looking at the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen.

"Your Royal Highness" he says with a smile as breathtaking as his eyes.

"Hi" I reply, my voice sounding all squeaky.

"I was looking forward to meeting you."

"Me? Really?"

"Yes, ma'am. My mum is a big fan of yours, she says you are the best royal."

"Oh, she's too kind" I giggle. I giggled. Why did I do that? What am I, 12?

"Should we pose for the photo?"

"Uh?" I ask, still looking at him. How is he real? How is it possible that I had never noticed that Declan Rice was this handsome?

"The photo, Eleanor" my dad says behind me.

"Oh, yes, sorry. The photo" I repeat, trying to compose myself a bit.

"Big smiles... Perfect" the photographer says.

"Thank you" Declan smiles, taking the box where the shirt is, our fingers touching slightly but making me feel electricity through my whole body. And call me crazy, but judging by the way he looked at me when it happened, he felt the same.

Once we are done giving all the shirts, Southgate gives my dad and I a tour of St. George's Park, but I can't stop thinking about Declan. About his eyes, his smile, about the way that small touch made me feel. I still don't know how I managed to keep going, to be honest.

When we walk outside, some players are practicing free kicks on the training pitch, Declan among them.

"Eleanor, why don't you show these boys how it is done?" my dad says.

"What?"

"We all saw you training with the lionesses, ma'am. That right foot of yours can do things" Mount chuckles.

"But I'm not wearing the right shoes."

"C'mon, ma'am" Southgate insists.

"Ok, then. But if I end up breaking a window, or worse, my ankle... it is your fault" I say, making them all laugh.

"Ready, Rambo?" Rashford asks before shooting.

"Give me your best!" Ramsdale shouts.

"That was so good" my dad says when Rashford scores. "Your turn now, darling."

"Ma'am" Declan says, giving me a ball.

"Thank you" I reply, trying to avoid looking at him, my cheeks already getting hot. "Don't go soft on me, Ramsdale."

"I won't, ma'am" he says with that big smile of his.

"See?" I sigh after shooting and sending the ball far far away. "Wrong shoes."

"Try again" Declan says, putting another ball in front of me. "I know you can do it."

"Will you pay for the window I'm going to break?"

"And I'll carry you to the infirmary myself if you break your ankle" he smirks, making me feel funny things on my stomach, and my father clear his throat behind us.

"Ok" I whisper, trying to forget the thought of his arms around me and taking a deep breath, focusing only on the ball.

"I knew it!" Declan says next to me when the ball goes in, Ramsdale not being able to stop it.

"You believed in me more than I did."

"I've seen you play before, I know what you can do."

"You have?"

"Yep. When you were like... 15? You played a charity game in my area and my mum took the whole family to watch you. I remember that you scored and amazing free kick."

"Oh, wow. I don't know if I remember that day" I chuckle. "I'll have to check the photos back home. I may even see you."

"I didn't look this good, tho. You may not recognize me" Declan says with a cheeky smile.

"But you still had the same eyes, didn't you? Those are hard to miss."

"Thank you, ma'am" he replies, his cheeks turning a dark shade of pink. Did I just make him blush? Me? Oh, wow. "I also remember that I didn't expect a princess to play football like that."

"What did you expect, then?" I ask, raising a brow.

"I don't know" he shrugs. "Maybe that you enjoyed other type of sports, like cricket or that thing with the horses."

"Equestrianism."

"That one, yes."

"Posh sports."

"Yeah..." he chuckles, scratching the back of his head and making the muscles on his arm pop. Why did he have to do that when I was finally acting normal around him, maybe even flirting? Now I'm stuck again just looking at him.

"We must go, Eleanor."

"What?"

"It's time for us to go, the boys have to train" my dad says.

"Oh, yes, of course."

"It was really nice meeting you, ma'am" Declan says.

"You too."

"See you in Canada?"

"See you in Canada" I repeat

"Great" he says with a big smile that makes whatever I'm feeling on my stomach be more intense. "Until then."

"Bye" I say, definitely smiling like an idiot.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━      

"That was nice, wasn't it?" my dad says once we are back in the car.

"Really nice, yes."

"Fell in love with any of them?"

"What?" I say, feeling my cheeks getting hotter and hotter by the second.

"I was only joking, relax."

"Oh" I reply with a nervous laugh.

"You are a clever girl. You know that you can't fall in love with a football player."

"Why not? You married mum and she was a journalist."

"One with a degree and a PhD, a serious career. These boys have nothing beyond money and being good looking. At least some of them" he chuckles.

"These days more and more players are studying while playing, tho" I point out.

"Still, it isn't enough. You are meant to be the next Queen of England. You must marry accordingly."

"Dad, this isn't the 15th century."

"I know, I know. But there are certain things that must still be kept in mind. So when you travel to Canada to support the team, do not fall for any of them, ok?" he laughs.

"Ok" I say, rolling my eyes and looking out the window, thinking that it may be a bit late for that.

[heyclickadee]

I have another one of those long “Tech’s alive and here’s why,” posts sitting in my drafts. I haven’t posted one in months, so I figured I may as well write out one of the takes I didn’t get to back last spring, but I haven’t had a chance to site down and write it all out in the last few days, or I haven’t wanted to during the couple of times I have been able to sit down. It’s a little silly, I’m sure someone’s already covered it, I mostly write stuff like it for fun at this point, and I’ll probably post it in a few days.

But here’s the thing. Yes, I like going through and finding text-based evidence or interpretations that point to Tech surviving the fall or even faking his death on purpose. It’s fun. But, at the end of the day, the two simple, straightforward reasons I think Tech survived are because: one, the show—basically everyone involved in making it—is playing with ambiguity at all; and two, because Tech living seems like a reasonable conclusion given what we know about him, the show, and star wars in general. Between those two things, it will not click in my head as a character death.

Tech might be important to me on a personal level, but I know he’s not the lead character or the most important character in the context of the actual show. Hunter and Omega are the main leads. The Bad Batch is their story first. Taking Tech out of the picture for a bit, as much is it wrecked me, accomplishes a lot of things at once and pushes those stories forward; Hunter needed that shoe to drop and to have all his worst fears realized, Omega needed that shoe to drop in a different sense, and the series of events that unfold as the direct result of Tech sacrificing himself leads to both of them losing almost everything within a couple of hours. Things couldn’t keep going as they had without becoming stagnant, and they needed to hit those low points.

That said, I think leaving Tech out of the picture permanently would do a huge disservice to Hunter’ and Omega’s stories, too. To the bad batchers’ stories in general. The show is so heavily focused on that little family that starting the show with the family fractured, broken, and missing members and then feeding them through the grinder only to leave the family fractured, broken, and missing members permanently without ever once giving them a chance to be whole would be weird.

Tragedy is fine. Sad stories are fine. I like tragedy—I find tragedy in fiction genuinely helpful, to be honest. On that level, I wouldn’t mind if it turns out The Bad Batch has a tragic ending where they can never really fix things between all of them because not everyone is there, even if it would gut me. It’s just—I don’t think it makes sense, and I don’t think that’s the direction they’re going.

[mrsriddles-blog]

Her Girl | P.P

Pairing: Slytherin Fem Reader X Pansy Parkinson

WC: 2k+

Warnings/Notes: Mild language, kissing, angst, drugs…

Summary: Unsure of how either of you feel and not wanting to risk losing one another as a person in each other’s lives, you continue to dance around the truth of your guys’ relationship.

A/N: I am so sorry! It has been ages since I’ve actually posted a piece of writing! This is a draft and I’ve seen all the requests, I’m working through them slowly, but surely! College and work have been a real pain in the ass, so I’m so sorry guys! I’ll probably be switching up the plan I had originally just to try and get some more work out and posted. I’ll also probably do away with the song fics until I have more time on my hands! I’ll try to finish the ones already planned and of course if a request comes up, but it’s super time consuming!

"Hey, who's that?" Lorenzo asks, pointing at you.

You sat alone at a table in the courtyard, your green robes sticking out to your own house. They've never noticed you before and clearly you were new if you were sitting at the Golden Trio's table.

"I don't know, but I feel like we should rescue her before the Golden Trio gets to her." Draco says, looking in the direction of the glaring Gryffindors.

"Too late." Mattheo mumbles, taking another drag from his cigarette.

"Excuse me. Who are you sitting at our table?" Harry asks.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Is your name on this table? No, it's not. So it doesn't make it your table. Now get the fuck out of my face." You snap.

The boy who lived was taken aback by your hostility, along with your icy tone. He puts his hands up, deciding not to fight with you. He had no idea who you were anyway, only that you were an enemy by your house colors.

You watch as he backs away, a familiar look of fear in his eyes. You wait until the three fools turn around before focusing back on the letter to your father. You had found you hated Hogwarts as you've faced nothing, but bullying and not to mention you were still friendless after a month. 

You weren't one to give up, but this time...you weren't wanting to fight.

There wasn't anything here for you. No one even in your house has noticed you. You're barely noticed by the professors. It's like you don't exist because you're not apart of their clicks. You pull a cigarette out, lighting it in hopes it'll ease your nerves.

You pack up your belongings, tired of the chatter as you begin walking to the Astronomy Tower in hopes for some peace.

"Sorry, didn't know anyone was up here." You mumble, seeing a girl with long brown hair and green eyes.

She wore no robes, but she wore a green tie—one that hung loosely around her neck. You start to make your way to turn to exit as she speaks.

"No! Wait! Come sit." She says, her cheeks flushing red at sounding so panicked.

Panicked because she realized she'd been quite a tad bit too long and was just staring, so you had begun to walk away. You were hesitant, but you take a seat next to her.

"I'm Pansy Parkinson." She says.

"Y/N Y/L/N." You murmur.

"I've seen you around. I'm sorry I haven't introduced myself sooner. I assumed it would be overwhelming as I'm sure people were eager to meet you. It's not often we get someone in the middle of the year, let alone our fifth year." She explains.

"You're alright. It's been quite the opposite actually. You're the first person to actually speak to me...and notice me. Although, I'm considering lettering my father to get transferred elsewhere." You admit, putting out your cigarette to light another.

"What? Why?" She asks.

"I've faced quite a bit of bullying since I've got here. Not that I've cared. Typically I'll handle it, but I'm not quite sure who keeps pulling their stunts. And I haven't made any friends. It's been hard." You admit quietly.

"Don't send that letter just yet. You are now my friend. Let me introduce you to my other friends later at dinner. It'll be nice to have another girl apart of the group, oh, and I'll figure out who's messing with you, Y/n/n. I'll handle it." She says, giving you a smile.

"That's okay, Pansy. I'll figure it out sooner if later. It's my problem to sort out anyway." You say, managing a soft smile.

"You can handle it, but I'll also be handling it. Trust me, if I don't handle it, the boys will which means all of them will cast hellfire on the unfortunate bloke. The moment they meet you, you'll be apart of our little family." She says.

"Hey, Pansy? I was wondering if—." You say, before stopping.

She was in a dark green lace bra, wearing a mini skirt as she sifted through her closet. She smiles at you, one that sent your stomach in a bunch of flutters. Your cheeks flush red when you realize you were staring.

"What's up, love?" She asks lowly.

You swallow thickly, your thighs not so discreetly clenching together as a heat ignited in your core.

"I...um, nevermind. Sorry, I can't remember what I was going to ask. Sorry, um for barging in." You say, looking anywhere, but her.

"Hey, what happened to your lip?" She asks, stepping forward until she was in front of you.

She lifts a hand, cupping your face as she runs her thumb across your busted lip.

"Nothing." You mumble.

"This isn't nothing." She scolds.

"It's not that big of a deal, Pans." You mumble, pulling back.

She purses her lips, nodding and you sigh, knowing you've pissed her off. You turn, leaving her dorm as you walk back to your dorm.

There was a party tonight and that was what you had gone to talk to Pansy about. You sigh, running a hand through your hair. You wanted to be bold though, so you began the tedious search through your closet.

"Hey, I wanted to talk with you." Theodore says, slipping in your dorm.

You've settled on an outfit and now you just had to get dress. You start to shimmy your way out of your jeans.

"What's up?" You ask.

"So—oh, hey Pans." He says.

Her eyes were on you as you were half-naked in front of Theodore Nott—one of the two most notorious boys in Slytherin who screwed with girls.

"Oh...when did this happen?" Pansy asks quietly.

"It's not that, Pansy. I've seen her naked like a lot now. Friends only, pinky swear." He says, leaning back on your bed.

You rolled your eyes, seeing she wasn't convinced. You pull on the skirt and look at her.

"I'm gay, Pansy." You say.

"Oh!" She says, her cheeks flushing red.

"You really think this girl would let me sleep with her and let me see her naked on a daily basis? No! She'd kick my ass." He snorts.

"I-I've got to finish getting ready. Sorry! I can't remember what I was going to ask...actually, I do. I'm sorry, I got cold and I iced you out because you weren't comfortable telling me what happened." She says.

"Pans, it was a stupid argument I got into. I shouldn't have listened because I know the truth anyway. It's seriously no biggie. Go finish getting ready. You and I will slay this party, more so you." You say, smiling softly at her.

She smiles, her cheeks flushing red, but she leaves. You look back at your skirt and fix it before pulling your shirt over your head.

"So, that answered my question. One of them at least. But, do you like her?" Theodore asks, unfazed as you take your bra off and pull on the lace bralette that was a dark green.

"Of course I do! She's a great friend...she's been accepting of me since day one and she's been nice despite me having my days sometimes. She's always understanding and I love that. No one has been that way for me. Ever. I've never really experienced the love and care of friends until her...and of course you guys, but she and I are always going to be a little closer obviously." You ramble, pulling on the black blazer.

"I meant in a more than friend way." He says, lighting a cigarette.

You sigh, sitting at your vanity as you straighten your hair, going for a bold look. You settle on a vibrant red lipstick along with dark eyeshadows.

"Yeah, but that won't ever happen, Theo. She doesn't like me that way. Not to mention...I've tried to subtly hint to her only for her to brush past it. I've gotten my hint, so I'm going to be thankful I even have her in my life as a friend." You explain.

"God, you are blind." He mumbles.

"And what are you talking about?" You ask.

"I'm talking about the way she talks about you to us when you aren't around. It's like, she's in some dream. She gets this dreamy smile and look to her eye when she thinks or talks about you. She lights up when you're around. She cares about you, worried when you're having an off day or if you get in a fight. She's just scared to lose you. You are more than her girl than you realize. And what about that fight you got into with that Ravenclaw who was calling her a fag and stuff? That's just being friendly?" He asks.

"You're telling me you wouldn't have fought her for that?" You deadpan, turning to him.

"One, I would have if she was a he as I don't hit girls. Two, is that all you got from what I said?" He asks.

"Theo, I can't lose her. I don't think you realize what that will do to me if I lose her. It's not that I don't want to believe what you're saying. I just don't want to get my hopes up. What if you're looking for the same thing I am?" You ask.

"I guess we'll find out tonight. I heard a certain Gryffindor was going to show her moves on Pans tonight. Just know it's on you for letting her slip away." He says, leaving your dorm.

You frown, looking at your vanity for a moment before finishing up your makeup. You pull on your heels with the snake coiled around the heel as music began to play. You debated on even going to this party.

You went nonetheless, striding towards the bar where you mixed up a drink that was borderline death itself. Your eyes found Pansy chatting it up with Hermione Granger of all people. You frown, not noticing a Hufflepuff sixth year striding towards you.

"I'm Anna!" She calls, sending a flirty smile your way.

"Y/n!" You call, smiling back slightly.

Pansy had tuned Hermione out, her eyes on you before she stormed over to the boys. She smacked Theodore in the head who curses.

"What the hell!? I thought you said she liked me!" She snaps.

"She does! What the hell was that for?" He says, rubbing his head.

"She's talking to that sixth year Hufflepuff! That's what it was for!" She snaps.

"I said she likes you. I even told her that Hermione was going to make a move on you if she didn't. I never said she'd make the move though. You are really important to her, she doesn't want to lose you. She rather have you as a friend than lose you because she doesn't believe you like her." He explains.

"So, she's going to just dance with her? Are you actually listening to whether she likes me or not or are you just a fucking bloke?" She snaps.

"That busted lip is because she got into a fight with a Ravenclaw who was calling you some nasty names. I believe I heard her say something across the lines of don't talk shit about my girl. You can stand here and sulk about her dancing with Anna, or you can go get your girl. Your choice." He says.

Pansy looks at him with malice before relaxing and sighing as a tired look washes over her face. She looks up at you to see you dancing with Anna still.

"I'll handle, Anna. It won't go anywhere obviously, but just so you can whisk her away." Astoria says, taking her pin out of her hair and shaking her curls free.

Astoria was a new friend of the group because of her arranged marriage with Draco, but only the group knew of the arrangement.

Pansy strides towards the dancing crowd and grabs your hand. You look at her as Astoria whisks Anna away. Pansy pulls you off to a secluded corner and sighs.

"I'm a bloody idiot for not realizing how you felt. But, that makes you one too as you haven't realized how I felt." She sighs.

"What?" You ask oblivious.

"I like you, Y/n/n. I have for awhile." She chuckles.

"I...I like you too, Pans. I just...didn't think you would ever feel that way for me." You admit quietly.

"Fucking hell, shut up and let me kiss you." She laughs.

Your cheeks flush red, but nonetheless, you let her pull you in by your hips, your lips meeting her soft ones that tasted like her cherry lipgloss. You smile into the kiss as your guys' guy friends started to whoop and holler for you both. You flipped them the middle finger as Pansy's hands move to your ass.

"She's got her girl." Theodore chuckles.

"The hell they'll be together." Mattheo laughs.

[doctorguilty]

horror ask game: 2, 3, 22

2. most recent horror movie you watched and hated

This was some months ago lol but Halloween Ends. That movie was SO BAD, in the middle of it I took out my phone and posted like "what the fuck am I watching" on tumblr (you may have been there for that sjfdkgs). I don't even know what they were thinking. It made Halloween Kills look like a masterpiece (which wasn't GREAT, but I did enjoy it, as a fun romp). Why was Michael Myers barely in the movie. the hell was all that.

already did 3

22. a horror character that actually creeps you out/scares you

I had this sitting in my drafts and forgot about it b/c I couldn't think of an answer at the time but I do have one now, it's just that it's kind of depressing and involves IRL death (as in, the fictional character's relationship to a person who died in real life makes me very unsettled when seeing/hearing the character on screen)

so cw for reference to irl death continue at your own risk

so the answer is The Unknown from dbd, and not b/c of the body horror or lore or anything like that

The Unknown was released on March 12th, 2024. It's voiced by talented trans voice actress Zoey Alexandria, who I wasn't familiar with prior to the character's release, but I did look at one of her social medias at some point and saw her talking about how much she loved voicing Unknown. Zoey passed away at age 29 from a rare autoimmune disorder on April 30th, 2024.. less than 2 months after the character's release.

If you're not familiar, Unknown is essentially some kind of ambiguous entity that kills victims and wears their skin in a visually grotesque way. It has voice lines in game that are one of the creepier aspects of it imo. Sometimes the voice is male, sometimes female, they're always varying degrees of garbled, and sometimes they're random nonsense like "have you seen my dog?" and other times they're distressed cries for help like "I need someone.. anyone.. help, please"

They're definitely chilling on their own and, most definitely an awesome case of "she has the range!" re: the transgender actress.

But I have a thing, in general, where I can sometimes feel really disturbed when watching movies/shows/etc that feature a person who I know is now deceased. It's probably a mental illness thing, I don't know, but hearing the voice of/seeing the face of a person doing normal things while they're no longer alive in reality just.. freaks me out. I don't cope well with death in general. I don't like to think too much about or dwell on death irl, even people I don't know or even care about, like celebrities. I start to have some kind of existential dread.

SO the case here with the Unknown... is that its voice actress tragically passed away young so shortly after its debut, which is already an objectively upsetting thing for me to think about, and I can try not to, but ............. whenever I play against the Unknown, and I hear those garbled voices pleading for help, all the hair on my body stands up and my skin crawls

though I don't mean to present this as an objectively bad and scary thing, like, I don't want other people to be upset when they interact with the character. this is my OWN disordered brain stuff, and I try to just remind myself when I'm feeling distraught, that the actress truly loved working on the project and, if anything, it's nice that she got to complete it before her passing, so that she sort of lives on in it (rather than say, needing to be replaced early or something...). and the words themselves are fictional.

but it's probably the most "creeped out" I've ever considered myself about a horror character because ultimately, something stabbing real deep into my psyche like that just by sheer coincidence is undeniably scary, I guess? that's just the way I feel!

[marshmellowtea]

um. so. y'all are not going to believe this but i've had this goddamn fic finished for MONTHS but i fucking FORGOT??? IT WAS HERE??? IT'S JUST BEEN SITTING IN MY DRAFTS BECAUSE I FORGOR I HAD THIS BASICALLY FINISHED FIC JUST WAITING TO BE EDITED AND PUBLISHED HGKLDSJFLKSD 😭

ahem. anyway. sorry for yelling lmao. onto the actual fic summary—basically, i decided to write this silly little thing about human, arospec lila trying to talk about a newly formed crush with an aroacespec will. it's very silly and fluffy and writing it made me giggle a lot, don't expect much angst here, aside from like a sprinkling of it for flavor lmao. that being said, small warning for some toxic queerplatonic partner vibes between will and lila, but the vibe is still mostly lighthearted, it's not too heavy or extreme. also, they're working on it, okay :') they're teenagers who grew up in abusive/traumatizing environments (which isn't referenced in the fic but it definitely shapes the way i characterize them), they don't exactly know how to navigate a healthy relationship yet but they're trying goddammit dskjfkdsafj

.....uh, if it's not obvious, i don't remember how i do summaries on tumblr fics ngl. there'll probably be a cleaner one when this gets posted onto ao3 in a day or two, so watch out for that if you'd prefer to read this on there :P tbh depending on how tired i am when i get home from work i might just go ahead and post it on there later today anyway oops

anyway, onto the fic now, hope y'all enjoy! :)

William's curled up on his side, his upper body in Lila's lap and her hands kneading though his hair in a way that mostly feels good, when she suddenly asks the question.

"Is it called a crush because you want to crush them?"

If this were closer to the beginning of their friendship, when he wasn't already used to weird comments like these from her, William might've sat up in shock, giving her a wide eyed expression of surprise she loves to make fun of him for. This is far from the most outrageous thing she's ever said to him at this point, however, so instead, he just furrows his brow and shifts in her lap a little, not even bothering to open his eyes.

"Lila, what on earth are you talking about...?"

She's quiet for a moment, her hands pausing in his hair. He lets out a little whine at the loss of feeling, and she huffs softly before continuing, using a little bit more of her nails than she was before.

"Let's say...like...maybe there's this person someone thinks is...pretty," she says, the words awkward and stilted in a way he's never heard from her before. "And because they're so pretty, that person keeps...fantasizing about...squeezing them. In their arms. Or under them."

"Ew," he says on instinct, his fingers moving to fiddle with the black ring around the middle finger of his left hand. "Is this hypothetical person you, Lila?"

"No, dumbass!" she says, and, well, that almost sounds convincing. "I'm just...asking. For a friend."

"But I'm your only friend?" he asks, genuinely confused. His confusion then turns to pain, however, as she pulls on his hair—apparently she found that insulting. "Ow! Lila!"

"I have friends. Mainly friends you picked out for us—" and here, she huffs, sounding put upon about his choice in companionship, as though she has no choice in whether she hangs out with them too, "—but friends nonetheless."

...okay, admittedly, he understands where the offense came from now. But still, she claims that he's her only friend enough that of course he would make that assumption, and it's kind of not fair for her to punish him for words he's repeating from her. And also, he must reiterate, ow.

"Anyway, it's for a friend," she insists, sounding a bit wounded. "God. Don't be a smartass, Will, it's not flattering on you."

"I'm not trying to be a smartass, you're just—ugh, nevermind," he grumbles, letting his eyes flutter open and sulking at a vague point in the distance. His hand drifts toward the hem of her skirt, and he plays with it absently, rubbing his fingers over the soft fabric. "Putting all that aside, well...um, sorry to your friend, but I don't think I'm the right person to ask about that. I still don't really...understand all that stuff."

"Ugh, right, I forgot you were a fucking loser."

"I'm not a loser!" he protests, but he immediately feels childish for it. He flips onto his stomach to hide his face in her lap, and is instantly rewarded with one of her hands on the nape of his neck, a warm, comforting weight. "That stuff is just...really complicated..."

"Yeah, well, that's cuz you're a loser who's bad with people, it's okay to admit it."

There's a twinge of fondness to the insult, and despite himself, he finds himself smiling a little at her tone. Still, he decides to retaliate by lightly pinching her on the calf, just under the crook of her knee.

"Ow! Will!"

She then retaliates to him by pulling on his hair again, harder this time despite only using one hand this time. He lets out a sharp cry of pain and smacks her on the knee, pulling out of her lap briefly to escape her wrath. She drops her hands once he's fully off of her and sitting up on his knees, and he scowls at her unamusedly. She scowls back at him, the two of them staring at each other for a moment with equal mild annoyance.

Then, face unchanging, Lila pats her thigh, looking even more annoyed when he doesn't immediately lay back down. "Well?"

He huffs, but obliges, flopping back in her lap, this time on his back so he can continue to scowl at her. One of her hands returns to his hair, and the other one grabs one of his hands, though it feels less like she's just trying to hold his hand and more like she's trying to restrain him from pinching her again. Which, really, is super unfair, given that he only pinched her because she was being mean to him. And she pulled his hair first. And because she always does shit like that to him, and he deserves a chance to defend himself...

...but she is petting his hair in a way he likes again, and her face has softened a little, her lips now in that tiny but genuine sort of half smile he's only seen her use on him. He smiles back at her, wobbly and crooked but just as genuine, letting out a little laugh despite how genuinely annoyed he was moments prior.

"You're the worst," he says, and though he kind of means it he also says it with all the affection in the world. "I am sorry I can't answer your question, though."

"Hey, you also suck," Lila says back, but she coos it in the same tone you'd use on a mischievous kitten. "And it's fine, honestly. It wasn't a serious question, anyway. I was just wondering."

They fall quiet for a moment, and William's eyes fall to their enjoined hands, watching as Lila idly traces his fingers with her thumb. He's struck, then, with the oddest thought—that being, the thought that he does love her, in some weird way, despite the constant bickering and occasional minor physical attacks. That no matter how hard she makes it for him, he cares about her, and he wishes she would let him do that without constantly trying to fight on him on it. That he's glad she loves him too, in her own weird way, because he knows she does but he rarely gets to hear her say it out loud.

Not that he could ever say all that to her, of course. She'd probably just make fun of him.

Instead, he says, "If it is you with the crush...you know I'd be here to listen if you wanted to talk about it, right?"

He's fully prepared to let the conversation end there, but she surprises him by letting out a sigh and saying, "I don't even know if it is a crush."

He raises his eyebrows at that, trying not to get too excited at the information he was just given. She'd hate it if he said it out loud, but she's really easy to scare away on these rare moments where she's being open or vulnerable. "What do you mean?" he asks, trying not to let his voice soften too much.

She groans loudly at that, but she hasn't stopped talking, which, score. "I dunno, William, like...the crush question was kind of a joke? But it also kind of wasn't?"

"...elaborate?"

She groans louder, loud enough to startle him a little. She must feel him jump, because she gives his forehead a light pat before entangling her fingers back in his curls, the hair petting having mostly stopped now. "When I think about this person...I want to hold them as tight as possible and not let go. And squeeze their hand and just...hold it. And..." She grimaces, like it pains her to admit it. "And kiss them, maybe. On their stupid fucking face. Among...other things that I suppose I will graciously spare you."

She taps his ring as she says that, making him giggle. "Thank you. I appreciate that," he says, smiling broadly up at her for a moment, before his face falls back into an inquisitive frown. "Uh, but, Lila? I'm no expert, but that...kind of sounds like a crush? I think?"

Lila chews on her lip for a moment, as if considering what she's going to say next. When she finally speaks, William feels his heart cease to beat in his chest.

"I know, but like...a lot of that is stuff I want to do with you."

William feels his face grow hot, and he stammers, ice cold panic rushing through his veins. Yeah, he loves Lila, but it's not—it's not like that, he's not comfortable with—she knows he's not—

"Not the—not the sex stuff!" Lila says suddenly, giving him a harsh shake. "I didn't say I wanted to do all of that with you, take a fucking breath, Will!"

Oh, he did stop breathing for a second there, didn't he? He inhales deeply as she told him to, letting her lightly push him upright into a sitting position on the bed. He twists around a bit so the two of them are side by side, and she immediately tugs him closer until his head is on her shoulder, awkwardly patting his back in a way he thinks she thinks is comforting. It's a little much, honestly, given that his moment of panic really was just a moment—it was instant relief hearing that she wasn't into him in that way, and it was kind of silly for his brain to jump to that conclusion in the first place anyway since he mostly knows where they'd drawn the lines in their relationship, even if they've never properly talked about it—but he likes these rare occasions where she attempts to fuss over him, so he's not going to protest it. It's kind of sweet, really, even if it's obvious that she has no idea how to comfort another human being.

"Ugh," she says, sounding more embarrassed than exasperated. "Ugh, I said that in the stupidest way, sorry." Then, after a pause, she adds, "I mean...it's all just stupid, anyway."

"Aww, no it's not," William says gently, very comfortable in his place nestled against her side. "I guess I get what you mean though. I know I don't have a crush on you, but I like cuddling you and stuff. I'd also feel weird if I suddenly felt the same thing toward someone else but with...other stuff too."

"Yeah," Lila says, sounding mopey. Probably because she's moping, if he had to guess. "It's not just that, either, wanting to touch this person the way I touch you also feels...different. Different in a way that's hard to pin down." She grabs his hand, having lost it in the shuffle of him sitting up, and once again starts tracing his fingers, running her thumb from the back of his hand, over his knuckles, down to his fingernails. "Like when I do this, it's nice, but I don't do it and think about you as my boyfriend. That'd be disgusting."

William barks out a laugh at that. Technically, it could be an insult toward him, but... "I understand what you're getting at, yeah. I want to be close to you, but you're not, like, my girlfriend or anything, and I wouldn't really want you to be. You're just my friend, but, like...a friend I want to cuddle sometimes."

"Stop saying that we cuddle," Lila scoffs, but the usual harshness of her tone is still rather muted. "But...yeah. Exactly. It's different, and it's weird."

William hums sympathetically, giving her arm a light pat. "Yeah," he says quietly. "That does sound weird." Then, after a pause, "I'm sorry. I wish I could help you more."

Lila huffs, letting her cheek rest against his head. "I wish you could help me more too," she bemoans, interlocking their fingers and giving his hand a light squeeze. "But, whatever. Just talking about it was nice, so you're not completely useless..."

Once again, William just chuckles at that. He can hear the unsaid Thank you in her voice, and he appreciates it, even if he does wish she would just be straightforwardly nice to him sometimes. Hell, not even just to him, oftentimes he wishes she would be nice in general.

But...she's working on it. He thinks. There's been a notable difference in the way she speaks to Martha, Ellie, and Regina, anyway. She's still on guard around Jim and Mike, and god, he doesn't really know what her deal with Tanya is, but she's friendlier with those three, at least. And...she's been more gentle with him, too. At the very least there's been less pinching.

He's proud of her. Which is another thing he can't tell her if he doesn't want her to laugh in his face, but, hey. Maybe one of these days.

"...you wanna lay down now?"

Her question pulls him out of his introspection, and William hums in assent, finally pulling his head off of her shoulder. "Are we gonna take a nap now?" he asks, rubbing at his face absently. "I got pretty close to falling asleep before, well, you know."

She sniffs, pulling her legs up on the bed and stretching out behind him, her arms and legs reaching each end of the mattress before she rolls back onto her side and brings them back in again. "I mean, you can sleep if you want. I don't know if I will."

"You're not at all tired?" he asks, curling up on his side next to her. They're face to face, now, and he can see the exhaustion in her face, as well as the slight flush left over from their conversation.

"Not really," she sniffs. "I mean, I don't think I am enough to fall asleep. I just want to rest my eyes a little."

"Oh, okay," he says, scooting a little closer to her. "I might fall asleep. You didn't want to talk more, did you?"

Lila shakes her head rather than verbally answer, and William smiles to himself. She's probably going to fall asleep too, judging by the way she's gotten quieter, but even if she doesn't, he knows she'll let him sleep if he needs to. Unless something important happens. Or if she gets too bored, which is something important in Lila's eyes.

She kind of is the worst, but luckily for her, he kind of does love her.

He lets his eyes fall closed then, pressing further into her warmth until he's tucked up under her chin. She doesn't fight him on it, instead wrapping a loose arm over him, and he knows he's very close to drifting off when he hears her ask one last thing.

"You're really not going to ask who my hypothetical crush is on, are you?"

It's an interesting remark—it almost sounds like she's disappointed. Still, it's not interesting enough for him to open his eyes. "I kinda figured I wouldn't be able to get it out of you," he mumbles, his voice muffled by her collarbone. "Why?"

"...I dunno. I just thought you would ask," she says, starting to sound close to sleep herself.

"Did you want me too?"

"No." She says it too quickly. And then amends, "Maybe..."

He laughs sleepily, resting one curled up hand on the small of her waist, wanting to be closer, trying to absorb the warmth she's emanating—she's always run weirdly warm, while he runs weirdly cold. He tries not too think too hard about the way that makes them fit so well together. "Tell you what. When I wake up, I'll pester you about it as much as you want me to. Is that okay?"

"I didn't want you to pester me," she protests, scowl audible in her voice. "Just ask."

He laughs again, suddenly overwhelmed with a feeling of contentment. "'m gonna pester you so hard," he mumbles, picturing the dirty look he knows she's giving him despite his still closed eyes. "'m not gonna leave you alone until you give me answers. S'only fair."

"How's that fair?"

"I mean...you pester me when I try to keep secrets from you."

"I don't..." Lila protests, but she sounds amusingly unsure. "Besides, since when did you try to keep secrets from me anyway...?"

"Mm. I stopped tryin' cuz you'd always get them outta me."

"Well, that just sounds like your fault."

"...maybe you've got me there," he mumbles, chuckling softly. "I jus' think it's my turn to needle somethin' out of you this time, mmkay?"

"Yeah, well, good luck with that," Lila grumbles, making him giggle more.

The two of them then lapse into a comfortable silence, aside from their quiet breathing. William is just about asleep when he feels more than hears Lila murmur something against his hair.

"Love you, Will. No matter what happens."

He smiles widely at that. She must think he's asleep—rarely does she say that she loves him without him saying it first. Even then, he usually receives it with a (nonetheless fond) eye roll, so hearing it now sounding so genuine is a nice treat.

"Love you too, Lila," he mumbles back, his voice slurred from exhaustion. "Love you so so much."

Given the way she tenses, he was probably right in thinking that she thought he was asleep. Still, she doesn't respond with a protest or a quip like she normally does, whether because of her tiredness, or maybe she just wanted to let a nice moment linger for once. Either way, he'll count that as a win.

It doesn't take him long to drift off after that, the smile not leaving his face even as he sleeps.

[chiffaust]

— 𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒. s. izumi

— SYPNOSIS  You met Izumi out on a bicycle ride all by himself late at night, but why are you there too?

CONTENT fluff, late night talk i suppose + tw for izumi sena

( n ) — note this has been inside my drafts for so long. sorry if there's any mistakes, i didnt proofread this...

The day has fallen, and rises the night—you adore nights like these, right?

Well, you can't just like it anymore... These past few days, the nights only reminds you of the never ending work that awaits you tomorrow.

You really want a break.

The bright full moon shined upon you in the ground, walking along the tracks that'll lead you back home. Oh, it's super late and you just got off work... You don't even know what time it is, but you're sure that it's super late.

You sighed, wishing you could just take a whole month off right now.

And as you walk, you passed by the park near your home. The moonlight shining down onto the park made you stop completely to bask in the beauty. You look to your left and saw a bench.

You sat down on it and silently took in the scene, breathing in the refreshing night air as the wind breezes against you, it's so peaceful. You're now reminded on why you love the night so much.

And from the corner of your eyes, you saw a figure on a bicycle, riding along the trailways. The silhouette was getting bigger, and soon pass by you.

Your eyes widen in shock, that guy looks familiar? He was wearing a coat and a scarf for the cold night, and he had silver hair?

That guy is... Izumi?

Izumi's bike kept on moving until he stopped it himself. He turns to look at you—clearly as shocked as you are right now to be meeting each other.

"Hold on...?! What are you doing here?" He asks, albeit loudly. "You do realize that being alone at nights like these are dangerous?! What if someone robbed or even worst; kidnapped you?!" He nags, not even caring just how loud he's being right now.

"Yes, yes, I know... But I just got off work. Wanted to get my mind off things, y'know?" You said, smiling sheepishly at him. "Well, what're you doing here?" You ask, turning the topic to him.

"I suppose it's the same thing for me—to get things off my mind." He said, sitting down beside you.

You two sat down in silence, stargazing as you bask in the night breeze once again.

"So, what happened to you, Sena?" You ask, trying to strike a conversation with him.

"Urgh, you don't get it! Ou-sama and Naru have been so annoying these past few days, it kinda got under my skin."

"You probably think that everybody's annoying."

"Hmph, how dare you color me as a hateful person—I'm not! It's not my fault that they're all so annoying."

"Yes, yes, whatever." You replied, chuckling lightly. This guy so annoying. No wonder why Makoto doesn't like him. But he's annoyingly cute, you suppose.

He soon started ranting about things that he finds bothersome to you. You chimed in once or twice if you relate to some things which he finds bothersome (which isn't exactly a lot). But it's nice to know that he trusts you so much to the point where he could rant to you, you suppose. Or does he do this with everyone who'd even listen to a word he says...?

Time past by quicker when you're doing something to enjoy. Izumi looked at the hand watch he has and was shocked to find that it was already 2 in the morning.

"Ah, it's that late already? I'll go back home now." You said, getting up from your seat after you saw what the time is on his watch.

"No! I'll walk you home. I'd feel guilty if something happens to you on your way home."

"Haha, you're a nice person, Sena."

"Of course I am. But don't get the wrong idea. I'm doing this because I'm obligated to, okay? I'm not doing this because I like you or anything." He said, cheeks suddenly dusted with pink hues as he glares at you.

"Sure."

"And it's 2 am! If I don't— something might bound to happen, so I'm just walking you home for your own safety!"

"Right. Thank you for doing so, Sena." You thanked, nonchalant to his attempts to make it sound like he doesn't like you.

"Then get on the bike." He said, patting the back side of the bike before getting on it himself.

"Huh? You're seriously gonna let me ride your bike? Wow!"

"Nevermind, don't. Just walk on your own feet."

"Sena! You wouldn't let your dearest hurt their feet while walking, right? Sena, you're a monster..." You faked a tear, playfully sobbing at his statement.

"You're so annoying." He rolled his eyes, a smile crawling up his lips. But soon he sighed, "fine," Escaped his lips.

"Get on before I change my mind."

[george-weasleys-girl]

GWG Ramblings

The North Star Series - Writing George Weasley's Biography

~•~

This has been sitting in my drafts forever, waiting for me to finish it.

~•~

I published the first North Star chapter on July 30, 2022, but I'd started writing it months before that as a way of getting these scenes out of my head as well as to give George his own unique voice that is separate from Fred's, something he didn't get in the books. (Truthfully, neither of them really did. But that's another ramble for another time.)

Eventually, all these disconnected little scenes, which, timewise, were scattered all throughout his life, started coming together as one cohesive story. George's life story. That's when I realized I was writing his biography.

Once things started coming together in my mind, that's when I started writing the beginning. I knew then that he needed a stable, established relationship that wasn't constantly under the threat of disintegration. I also knew that I would need to explore both the immediate and long-term effects of Fred's loss and the war in general.

Fred's death is a critical, defining event that splits George's life in two. There's the George before his twin's death. And the George after. And then there's journey between them.

It's not going to be an easy thing to put into words, to put it mildly. Delving into the psychological and emotional destruction caused by twin loss is a difficult and intimidating thing to write, especially as someone who is not a twin or twinless twin. The death of one's twin decimates everything the surviving twin has known about themselves since the womb, and they have to rebuild themselves from scratch. It's a process that can take years, if not a lifetime.

***Warning: Minor spoiler beneath the cut.***

Of course, that doesn't mean everything will be easy.***

***That's why I wanted to give George an already established, strong, loving relationship that could withstand the coming storm and would serve as the anchor to his individual self.

To "just George."

His and Y/N's relationship is the one thing he knows is his and his alone, that in no way ever belonged to Fred.

~•~

Ok. So, yeah. End of spoilers.

At this point, I should probably stop before I give too much more away. Because I will if I'm not careful. 😆

And there's still a long way to go before the series ends. It is his biography, after all.

~•~

@milivanili99 @fancy-pantaloons @turvi @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @georgie-weasley @imshiningjustforyou @princess-paramour

[undead-potatoes]

SUNNY, did someone ask about Aurora and Jay and whether they like kids?? Do they get along with them, are annoyed by them? Would they want kids for themselves? How have they interacted with the kids in the bg3 world so far?

No-one did, so thanks for asking B)

This is gonna be long as usual so 🐻 with me

- - -

Much like she's with people in general, Aurora is kinda bad with kids. She likes them, quite a lot in fact, but she's awkward and doesn't know how to interact with them in a natural way. She does find them so so charming though, and enjoys being around them and observing their antics. I think she admires them too for how resilient they can be, how even in the face of so many horrors they're still filled with so much of that childlike joy.

But the Urge makes interactions difficult, since they're often extra gruesome around kids (as you pointed out). She tries her best to interact casually with any kids coming her way, but I think she also keeps her distance for the most part while the Urge rages on. Yenna might be the hardest one for her, since she's someone Rory has to interact with on a regular basis. It goes well for the most part, but I think Yenna probably picks up on Rory's weird vibes and just decides to keep interactions to a minimum (maybe she thinks Rory doesn't like her? Like what did she do wrong?)

She does want kids of her own she discovers, once she's free to live life on her own terms, but she's terrified of passing on any bhaalspawn bullshit to a biological child, so that's a route she doesn't even dare explore. There are other ways of becoming a parent though, and I can see her and Shadowheart bringing up a child together at some point (and I imagine Astarion is just mommy's weird boyfriend who teaches them all the wrong things and is over there like "I hate this kid. If anything ever happens to them I'm gonna turn into John Wick tho.")

- - -

First of all, I just posted a Jay backstory bit that's been sitting in my drafts since October, which adds some context to Jay's relationship with kids already in his life.

So very firmly on the other side of the scale we have Jay, who is really great with kids, possibly even better than with most adults. He knows how to talk to them in a way that makes them feel seen and respected, while still keeping in mind that they're children. Chatting with them, joking around, providing them comfort, it all comes pretty natural to him.

He obviously has a soft spot for the tiefling orphans. Looking at them he sees a reflection of himself from 40 years ago, and many of their schemes genuinely amuse him, though some of them are uuuh a little worrying. I think he tries to sway Mol a little bit since she's their leader, to steer her away from the worst of it, but she's just too stubborn for that. Her whole ordeal with Raphael really stressed him out tbh.

Yenna is an interesting one bc usually I would just write her off and say she never joined the party (it's a bit silly tbh), but Jay absolutely would pick her up and have her tag along if he thought she would be safer with them than being on her own. I assume they get along just fine (she mostly just has the personality of "pleasant child" in-game), and I think he enjoys teaching her stuff, for better and for worse. He's totally the kind of guy who will teach kids some questionable things (often by accident), and then go "no wait, do as I say, not as I do".

I initially (like months ago) thought of him as someone who might want kids, but I'm not so sure anymore. At least not in a way where he'll actively go out of his way to have children; any child that just happens to fall into his lap is a different story. This is partly why I'm a little conflicted about Yenna post-game, like what WOULD he do? He'd be very hesitant to send any child to an orphanage unless there were no other options, so idk where she ends up.

Overall I think he's just fine being everyone's favorite uncle. The kids love him, he brings the coolest gifts, and he gets to interact with them on a frequent basis in smaller bursts. He's the first anyone asks to babysit, and he almost always says yes, much to Gale's annoyance I'm sure ("but what about our plans, love" "we can do that tomorrow, they never get time off from the kids").

[fumifooms]

Underrated autistic Nagi observations

So like we all know Nagi is autistic in all but canon and some people have already pointed much of that out, but I’ve been hyperfixating on Neo Twewy for like a week (might have been naive of me but I honestly didn’t think it’d be such a long game :D) (edit: this draft has been sitting on my tumblr for months lol, I’m starting the hyperfixation again woot woot) and I got to this part earlier

And it might just be the most autistic interaction I’ve seen so far but in a subtle way enough that I don’t think anyone has talked about it so here I go! 

Beat says “Man how could anyone be so pissed at not getting a glass of water smh smh” which is more rethorical than a genuine question in the first place, but Nagi, who of course would interpret it as an actual question because the thirst for knowledge and her own experience of confusion at other people’s thought processes, just infodumps her psychoanalysis of this stranger. You might start believing Nagi relates/agrees with the guy by the end of it, but imo it’s just hyperempathy. She didn’t scan his thoughts to know that, she used logic while putting herself in his shoes and taking into account things like societal expectations to figure out what must have pissed him, and then she starts passionately ranting about a point of view that isn’t even her own and keeps thinking as if she were in his shoes so much that it looks like she’s the one who had those thoughts and experiences. A neurotypicalTM would have pretty much just gone “Dunno, probably just upset at not getting that basic thing if I’d have to guess, but yeah pretty ridiculous” or something, because yeah like I said ranting like that about what someone else’s opinion must be often make people look at you suspiciously and think you’re agreeung when you’re simply stating their opinion in an informational way without feeling the need to defend your understanding of them every 3 words. And also that’s why I love how the other chars after it just went “ehh I still don’t get it but I guess” instead of turning on her or questioning her passion or smth, it truly feels like they’re normalizing autistic behavior and never shun her about it <33 Also her face when she jumps into the conversation to say it... When Beat’s like “what even was he mad about” she just jumps in like “Oh, oh! I know that!” and just like, the urge to infodump lol. The pride of understanding something, having cracked the code after a long time of not understanding it either. Detective-ing. She looks so much like she’s thinking she’s being useful or smth i love her sm <3

Also another thing others haven’t pointed out to my knowledge, but while part of Nagi’s reluctance to do dives is definitely because she feels uncomfortable invadings others’ privacies and minds, I do think there’s a sensory overload aspect to it too. After all, not only are dives tough fights, they’re also constantly hearing the person’s negative thoughts, and the emotional auras that paint the whole place a certain color and seems to even affect the air feels like it’d be something uneasy to process on its own. BUT why I even thought of it being some kind of sensory overload is Nagi’s reaction after the gatto neko dude dive on week 2 day 4. While Rindo seems to have recovered from the fight, speaks easily and casually thanking Nagi with his usual sprite, Nagi’s is slumped and exhausted, only managing a “Phew...” this to me reeks of mental exhaustion after doing a social or high sensory activity. None of the other psychs seem to particularly tire any of them besides her, after all There’s also the first thing she says about it: there’s definitely a part of it that’s about how social and emotional it is. Just this very intimate sort of social interaction is overwhelming and uncomfortable on its own.

(I sadly don’t have a screenshot of her sprite when she said it, but it’s this one, which is telling)

Also, dyspraxia, that’s why she’s often so clumsy. She didn’t just fall in the stairs, she fell headfirst in the stairs. Her sprite of jumping away in shock/fear also says dyspraxia to me, the way her body language is so strong, like her movements are either minimal or extreme, and the way one of her hands has some fingers curled tightly while others are straights also seems weirdly discoordinated to me lol. Her stance/animation in fights is pretty overexaggerated and not useful in the least too. I could probably list more but you get the idea.

Also, she has trouble with volume control I think!! Sometimes when she rants about EleStra she gets screaming speech bubbles and lol, yeah, felt.

Here’s like… The one other tumblr post about autistic Nagi observations : https://beastenraged.tumblr.com/post/658561921344307200/i-really-love-nagi-in-neo-twewy-and-part-of-that

[webbedphantom]

Shadow Spider

So, I've mentioned this concept before, even posted a bit of the edits I made for it, but I never fully went into detail about it, just showed off the design. And since I've been seeing a lot of Shadow Joker recently, both in fanart and different verses of the Joker's I follow, I figured it was finally time to go in depth with the idea

(Edit: This has been sitting in my drafts for MONTHS, but I finally got it to a point where I feel like sharing it. So here you go!)

The Set Up

During a routine patrol, Aaron comes across his version of Mysterio, breaking into a lab researching the Metaverse and how it effects the mind. This version of the Illusionist is somewhat inspired by Scarecrow from DC. Instead of using special effects from movies, he uses a hallucinogenic gas, a gas he's also addicted to, to warp his victim's perception of reality. In small doses, it can heavily disorient someone. In larger doses, and with a bit of mental prodding from ol' Fishbowl head, the victim will be thrown into whatever ridiculous scenario Mysterio decides to put them through.

And it's that last part that he's looking to enhance, planning to add a chemical compound found in this lab to make the people under the influence of his gas MUCH more susceptible to persuasion.

Now whether or not this is the first time Aaron's fought Mysterio (originally it was, but now I'm not so sure), he'd still be new enough to his tricks that fighting the guy is a struggle. And during that struggle, he'd end up shattering a container holding the compound, allowing its fumes to mix with the gas already in the room, giving Mysterio exactly what he needs to get the edge over the Spider.

Mysterio makes him believe that he got away, that he failed to stop him, and that single suggestion planted a seed that would spread like wildfire.

Aaron has a lot of insecurities, a lot of doubts about if he deserves his powers or not, a lot of fears of letting everyone down, and this suggestion plays into that and cranks it up to eleven.

He starts seeing hallucinations of his friends, all mocking him, all tearing into him for failing, telling him how much better they'd be with his powers, how they were wasted on a loser like him.

And he just breaks. Because he believes every word of it.

Not to mention, the illusions are so realistic, and his mind and heart get so messed up from this, that he can't even tell what's real anymore. As far as he knows, his friends really said all that, and that really tears him up inside.

So, this isn't exactly a typical shadow. His desires haven't been naturally distorted, they've been twisted by a lie he was fed by Mysterio's gas, and that slowly begins to infect every part of his mind.

In and Out of the Mask

Aaron's unique bond allows him to keep some of his powers, despite no longer having access to Arséne, though he's been made far weaker as a result. Even still, he'd be a challenge for any regular person to take on, and if they're his friends, they'll probably have to take him on. (You'll see why in a bit)

But this distortion has also made the difference between him in the costume and not a lot more distinct.

Aaron outside of the mask has been made a total mess. He shuts himself into his room, refusing to talk to anyone. And if anyone tries to talk with him, especially his teammates, he begs them to leave, seeming almost terrified of them. He's barely eating, barely sleeping, hardly taking care of himself at all. He doesn't see himself as worth... anything when he's not wearing the mask. Which only causes him to spend more and more time in it.

In the mask, however, he's a much different beast. Whereas Aaron reacts to his distortions with fear, the Spider reacts in anger. And because his costume is cognitive, it has changed to match his new outlook.

He's lashing out at the world, brutally beating any criminals he comes across. And if he comes across any of his teammates, HOO BOY they better shocking run. The distorted illusions of his friends have made him despise them, actually reversing his social links with them. Meaning the closer he was with them before, the more he hates them now.

And this distortion isn't stagnant either, it grows and evolves over time. At first, it's only his teammates that appear in the hallucinations, but slowly more and more of his confidants begin to appear, all throwing out the same insults and vitriol, starting with the ones he was closest to and working its way down the list. And as we'll later see in his palace, its effecting his memories too, slowly erasing all the good times he's had with his friends, until all he can remember is the pain and the hatred he feels right now.

If left unchecked, he might start lashing out at more than just his friends and random thugs, but the citizens as well. After all, who else has thrown more hatred his way than the general public, who sees him as nothing more than a menace?

Two Different Paths

Now, obviously his friends are going to want to save him, to change his heart and get him back to the way he was. But it doesn't have to be through his Palace.

Since in the AU there is no MetaNav, obviously any version of this event set there would require a method to change his heart without entering it. Which is part of why I went for this unnatural shadow approach. Sure, changing a heart without the Metaverse isn't impossible, but this makes it a bit easier. Though it's still not a cakewalk.

Mainly, the IRL version of this would be figuring out what's wrong with him, maybe through an investigation, or just picking it up from context clues he drops. Then it's just a matter of convincing/reminding him of the good times, of how much they care about him, and how they're not willing to give up on him and let him suffer alone. This would naturally mean coming to blows with the Spider a couple of times, but eventually they would be able to get through to him, and help him break through the illusions Mysterio had infected him with.

The Palace version... well, that's a bit more complicated.

The Spider's Palace

Now because I never got to finish this event properly, I was going to put this section under a read-more. But because it's so complex and dense that it's why this post has been sitting in my drafts since December, I'm gonna just make a seperate post for that at some point down the line, since I really like this concept and want more people to know about it to (maybe) spin this event off into its own verse and do some in-depth threads for it.

So yeah, that post will come eventually. I've actually just put everything I'd written so far in a Google Doc so I wouldn't lose any progress. In the meantime, let me know what you think!

[starlightswitch]

A Beer and a Band and a Breakthrough

(for Writer's Month day 25 prompts relax and at a concert)

“Maybe you just need a better environment.”

“A better environment? Am I… a house plant?”

Anthony chuckled. “I just think you need to try something different. You keep saying you can’t when it’s more than a few people, but you’ve only tried many people when probably a lot of them have things to worry about. What if you tried where there were a lot of people, but there was something counteracting it? A general positive vibe? And a setting that gave you a positive vibe, so you had something to focus on to help you relax? I think it should be easier in an environment like that.”

Brennan thought about it. “Worth a try. What kind of environment were you thinking about?”

“A chill concert? This weekend there’s one with a local band that’s apparently really good. My sister sent me a video a while ago, and she said they must have a bunch of fans because wherever she’s seen them the place has been full even if it’s usually quiet. They don’t usually come this way but this weekend they are. And it’s free– well, just cover charge. It’s at a brewery.”

“Oh. Okay.” Brennan considered it more. “Yeah, that makes sense. A big crowd who’s into the band… There would probably be some people worrying– and the employees or whatever could be stressing about the crowd– but mostly people would be into the music. Would I be into the music?”

“Probably? You like country. I know they do country. Also some like 80s and 90s hits, popular stuff people know the words to. What she sent me was Free Fallin’. Also there’s supposed to be a taco truck for food. And since it’s a brewery, beer.” He frowned, his mouth twisting. “Although I don’t know if alcohol would throw off the experiment.”

“Probably not if I don’t drink enough to feel it. I do know my limits.”

Whether I stay within them or not was the unspoken end of that sentence. Anthony knew it– he gave a quick heavy laugh that was almost a snort. “So, this weekend?”

“Yeah, yeah. Thanks,” he added in a serious tone, meeting Anthony’s eyes.

“Thanks?”

“You know. For believing me. I know, like you said it’s kind of a weird thing to make up…” If he wanted to trick him, Anthony had pointed out, it would make more sense to pick something believable. Or at least an interesting kind of impossible psychic ability, instead of “senses people’s worries, specifically”, which didn’t even exist in fiction.

“Hey, it doesn’t hurt anything to believe you,” Anthony pointed out. He had said that last time too. And this time he added, “And if this is some kind of long-term trick, you tricked me into going to see a band and drink a beer with you. Ooh, you got me. What a prank.”

Brennan laughed. And thought that going to see a band and drink a beer with Anthony was a pretty good deal, even if it was no help with his weird psychic ability.

The brewery had a stage out back and a variety of seats– Adirondack chairs, couches, even a couple of swings– but most of them were taken. Anthony steered Brennan toward the two open stools on the back porch, which had a good view of the stage, and said he was going to get their beers and would text him the draft list. “If there’s a hazy, just get it!” Brennan yelled after him.

The worries were already nagging at him. Worries about dealing with angry customers which must be coming from the bartenders, a worry about not getting a reaction from the audience which must be coming from someone in the band, a worry that someone’s boyfriend was cheating on them, a worry about kids at home with a babysitter, a worry about a kid trying to sneak up to the bar and order a beer. The next song began, and someone who must be in the band was worrying they’d forget the chord changes.

Brennan tried to relax and listen to the music. Treat the worries in his mind like chatter at a restaurant, or heavy rain on the roof, or a loud air conditioner he was sitting a bit too close to. He’d gotten good at it when it was just one or two people, but large groups always got to him. Test days were the worse– he’d opened up to Anthony right after a final he’d been confident about until he got into a classroom full of people who were the opposite.

The song ended, and after a hearty round of applause and some whoops from the audience the band started into the next one. Brennan let out a whoop of his own when he recognized it– a Blackhawk song he’d thought everyone but him had forgotten about.

Laughing, Anthony dropped into the seat next to him, plunking down a nicely hazy beer and sipping the purple one he’d had in his other hand. Grooving to the music, Brennan tapped out the drum beats at the end of the chorus and said the last line along with the singer.

“You’re right,” he said a couple of songs later. “It’s a lot easier not to focus on it when there’s something else to focus on. I’m not sure how that translates to when there isn’t something this interesting to focus on, but it’s a start.”

Anthony suggested he get their food now since the food truck line would probably get long when the band took a break, and after they ate their tacos he went and got the second round of beers, and when he came back with those, Brennan joked, “I just now realized you’re paying for everything. Is this a date?”

And suddenly a worry cut into his mind, crisp and clear.

He swallowed. “Okay, give me the honest answer,” he said. “You’re worried about what I would think of the honest answer. What’s the honest answer?”

“Uh,” said Anthony. “That would be… that it’s a date if you want it to be?”

Brennan tried to think of an eloquent answer and came up with nothing. “Yes,” he said.

Anthony grinned.

He definitely should have thought of something meaningful to say next, but something popped into his head– “How come you were never worried about it before? I never noticed you worrying about… it…”

“Oh. Well, I kind of thought you felt the same way, I just… didn’t expect it to be quite so abrupt. And I would have liked to say something that sounded better.”

Brennan had to laugh. Gently. Warmly.

The light was all golden, and the band was singing Luke Combs’s song about being better together, and any worries around were just background noise.

-

2020 day 25: Break Through (drop x x FFF 63 creeping magic)

2021 day 25: A Hoard of Friends (obnoxious x FFF 115 endless greed)

2022 day 25: When Everything Was Possible (bow + fantasy AU)

[letstrywritingmaybe]

In another installment of airport musings (no writing this time cause I was low key running late and I was reading a fic) I’ve come to the realization of why I prefer CoAi/ShinShi vs ShinAi/CoShi. And it’s because I’m a hater. Especially towards ShinAi (even though my favorite fic of all time in this fandom is a ShinAi fic. I cry). I really hate the idea that he gets to experience both relationships while my queen usually stays single. That’s so not fair! Look I’m all for the canon ship failing but it’s always like ten years later when guess what magically my queen becomes an option again. Ugh, the idea just irks me so much. My queen should be allowed to date too, but the age difference is too jarring so she has no choice. Sure we can argue she would probably only choose him anyways, but again that just doesn’t sit well with me. Cause he gets to experience the ups and downs of his first and only relationship with his childhood best friend, AND he also gets to live happily ever after with my queen??? And I know I shouldn’t compare, cause he could’ve been miserable the whole time, but it’s usually just uneventful and he’s tired of it. Just putting up with it for like ever until he sees he can do better and he should let her do better too cause they’re just not compatible. Idk I’m all about growth and learning and shit, but in this case I’m just so over it. It’s always about him. And I’m just a hater

Update: I’m a liar cause I did write a teeny bit on the plane before I took a nap. Someone wanna tell me why we’re over 5k for the otp prompts this month… why do I keep doing this! And there’s so many skips already I cry. I swear I’m almost done then maybe I can try and finish CoAi week… I really don’t know if I’ll make the deadline man. I’m at the point where I’m both incredibly busy and also have nothing to do at the same time. Yes I know that doesn’t make sense but it’s how I feel. There’s just a lot and I’m feeling anxious *sigh

Update 2: I think I finished the august prompts, Omm. A little over 6k, but the draft is done! Does this mean there’s hope for CoAi week after all? I sure hope so…