#THE CINEMATOGRAPHY I GASPED!!!!!!!!!

[pathologicalreid]

not that kind of movie | S.R.

movie night takes an interesting turn - for the better, definitely

who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: smut (18+ mdni) content warnings: the movie in question is metropolis, fingering, soft dom!spencer, i really don't know that there's anything else, kissing, they probably fucked after this, very slightly proofread, if this is incoherent let's just pretend it is. word count: 1.45k a/n: just a fun little fic i typed out tonight. also chip taylor gif spotted. i'm so tired i have nothing else to say for myself.

If you were being entirely honest with yourself, you were struggling to keep your eyes open during the movie.

As a result of a very intense rock, paper, scissors game, Spencer had been the one to choose the movie that you watched tonight. The movie he had chosen just so happened to be in a foreign language – German – that your boyfriend was attempting to learn. Your lack of German comprehension combined with the black-and-white film put you in a rough spot, you were in serious danger of falling asleep on the couch.

Spencer wouldn’t hold it against you if you did happen to drift off, but it felt rude. He never fell asleep during any of your film selections, and just because you didn’t understand the content didn’t mean you couldn’t respect the cinematography of the old-timey dystopian. “Are you falling asleep?” He whispered, adjusting the blanket that had been tossed over the two of you so that you were fully covered.

Shaking your head stubbornly, “No, ‘m watching the movie,” you insisted, prying your eyes open to focus on the screen in front of you and trying to figure out who was Freder and who was Joh.

“Good, keep watching,” Spencer said softly before pulling at your legs, leaving them draped across his lap as his fingers ghosted over the waistband of your pajama shorts. He looked over at you and in the dark of the living room, you were grateful he couldn’t see the flush of your cheeks. “Watch the movie,” he murmured, moving to trail his fingers up your thigh.

Your breathing hitched as his hand stopped, and as he started to massage the inner part of your thigh, you let your head fall to the side. “You’re distracting me,” you protested, smiling despite yourself while his fingers moved closer and closer to your core.

He hummed in response, “I thought this could help you stay awake,” he offered knowingly.

“Can’t hurt to try,” you concurred happily, extremely content with the turn of events that your movie night had taken – even if Metropolis wasn’t that kind of movie. You sighed as Spencer’s fingers deftly nudged your shorts to the side, using his hand to rub you over the flimsy fabric of your underwear.

In your periphery, you watched Spencer turn his attention back to the movie, his lips moving as his brain translated the words as they came from the speakers.

Taking a deep breath, you looked back at the television, your brain was fuzzier than ever, but at least now you were enjoying yourself, “Spence,” you whimpered, wanting more of him.

To your chagrin, his movements slowed, “Shh, watch the movie,” he told you, “You have to pay attention, or I’ll stop.”

You groaned before turning your head, watching the fuzzy black and white screen as robots started to take over and you realized you had no idea what the plot of this film was, “Please don’t stop,” you breathed, gasping when his fingers pushed your panties off to the side. You considered offering to take your shorts and underwear off, but you were too afraid of him stopping to even bring it up.

The volume of the movie was barely loud enough to cover up the soft, breathy noises that came from you as Spencer trailed his index finger up your slit before settling his hand on you, the elastic of your panties keeping his hand close as he pressed his thumb to your clit. You bit your lip to keep quiet as he started to move his thumb in slow, tantalizing circles, a small chuckle coming from him as your hips bucked up involuntarily, “Poor baby,” he said, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Feels good,” you mumbled, trying to keep from closing your eyes and just focusing on the pleasure you were receiving. “More,” you beckoned, taking a chance and flickering your eyes over to where he was sitting. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was simply enraptured with the film instead of having some sort of anti-staring contest while playing with you on the couch.

Not making any move to change what he was doing, Spencer seemingly ignored you, “You’ll get there, angel. I’ll let you come in a bit.”

With the promise of an orgasm in your near future, you decided you could toughen out the remainder of the film. This would be true if he would do anything but drag his thumb in annoyingly slow circles around your clit.

Resigning yourself to another thirty minutes of torture, you focused back on the screen, where you had definitely missed an important plot point. You had no idea when they ended up underground, “Ah!” You said, clamping your hand over your mouth as Spencer had decided to slip his index finger inside of your cunt, “Fuck, Spence,” you said, voice muffled by your own palm.

“Uncover your mouth,” Spencer told you, too far away to move your hand on his own, “I like to listen to you.”

His words sent your stomach into a flurry of somersaults, only spurred on by the calculated movements of his finger as it slipped deeper into you, knuckle by knuckle, until your warm walls wholly enclosed his finger. “Jesus,” you breathed, moaning as his hand moved, slipping his digit in and out of you with ease.

A strained breath from your boyfriend told you that he was having a hard time holding himself back, but at some point, he had dedicated himself to dragging this out. “You’re doing so well, just keep watching,” he appeased, “the movie’s almost over.”

You weren’t entirely sure you believed him until he sunk his finger back into you, using his fingertip to swirl around your inner walls, hitting a spot that made your eyes roll into the back of your head. “Mm,” you whined, “that’s nice.”

“Yeah?” He asked knowingly, “You like letting me touch you on the couch? All splayed out and pretty for me?”

Not that you’d ever admit this to him, but you sometimes thought he could make you come just from his words alone. Of course, that information would not be used to your benefit, “Yes,” you answered, ignoring the way your cheeks flushed, “Yeah, baby.”

Spencer hummed and your breath caught in your throat as a second finger slipped inside of you, joining the other one in its crusade to bring you to an orgasm, “That was a good answer.” His words did nothing to slow your racing heart, any thought of the movie was a distant memory as all it did was provide a slight glow around the living room.

Afraid of finishing before the conclusion, you reached down and grabbed Spencer’s wrist as his fingers continued their taunting rhythm, but it felt so good, and he was taking such good care of you, that you couldn’t stop his ministrations.  

“Are you alright?” Spencer asked making note of the way your hand gripped his wrist, continuing his movements when you assured him you were okay, “Oh,” he murmured, voice dripping in mock pity, “Do you wanna come?”

You nodded despite the fact that he couldn’t see you, writhing on the couch as you mumbled an affirmation and gasping when his thumb returned to its home on your clit, resuming the slow circles from before and slowly driving you toward insanity as your orgasm built in your lower belly, “Spence, ‘m gonna…” your voice trailed off as he continued to touch you, the volume of the film rising with your moans.

Not allowing his movements to falter, Spencer focused more of his energy on you, “You can come, baby. It’s alright,” he said, watching you fall apart on his fingers as he rambled on, “There you go, honey.” His fingers slowed to a stop as you caught your breath, just for it to hitch again as his fingers withdrew from your wet heat.

As the world came back into tune, you pulled yourself up to a sitting position and looked at the now black screen. Humming, you shifted over to Spencer, settling yourself in his lap, one knee on each side of him, you tilted your head to the side and smiled at him.

“Did you like the movie?” He whispered, pressing a quick kiss to your lips before moving back.

You nodded, leaning in to kiss the corner of his mouth, trailing a line of kisses along his jaw line, “One of my favorites,” you murmured against the soft skin of his neck.

Spencer laughed softly at your answer, “Yeah? What was your favorite part?”

Grinning in the dark, you moved your lips up to his ear, “The end.”

[theother-victoria]

Mr reca word vomit bc the brain worms won’t leave my brain!!! I promise I’m Very Sane abt this man

TAGS: not proofread, written before his release so potentially ooc and I’m too lazy to rewrite it post-release, secret relationship trope, reader wears lipstick, making out eheheheheh, reader is smaller/shorter than him, this is my propaganda and sign for u to become a reca kisser too

TAGLIST: @akutasoda, @https-sourlimes, @tragedy-of-commons, @mitsvriii (putting you on the reca kisser agenda >:3), @harque, @hazyue, @gabile18, @khoncore, @moineauz

Ok so imagine being in a secret relationship with the man himself…

Like the two of you HATE each other’s guts in public. As a rival film producer, the public loves to pit your films against each other, and the two of you as well apparently. There have been so many instances of you making small digs and sly remarks toward each other during interviews that it’s become somewhat expected by now. You have a gripe with the pacing of his films and his fame. He has a bone to pick with your cinematography.

“That manic director’s most recent film? I would give my thoughts, but unfortunately I fell asleep not even halfway through.”

“That uninspired, dreadfully dull and artistically lacking director? All their films look the same. I couldn’t differentiate them even if I wanted to.”

No matter how critically acclaimed your work is, he always has something to say about it.

Even if it was in the back of an alley with his hands gripping your hips tightly and teeth nipping at your neck.

"It took until a quarter of the way through the movie before- hah- your cinematography finally showed some signs of thought put into the shots. I know you can do better than this. So why- mmph- did it take you so long?"

You angrily nip on his bottom lip. A flash of satisfaction runs through you when you hear him hiss and taste blood on the tip of your tongue.

“Like you’re one to talk with the horrendous pacing of your newest film! Tell me, what was the plot of it again? Because I- mmm!?- already forgot the direction it was supposed to be taking twenty minutes in!”

"Well, you just simply lack reading comprehension. Not my fault, of course.”

“Oh, you little piece of-!”

He shuts you up with a rough and messy kiss. Your legs immediately go jelly and were it not for his leg slotted between yours and pushing you up against the wall, you think you would’ve collapsed right there and then.

When he pulls away, your lips are glossy and swollen. There’s a dazed look in your eyes that makes him smirk in satisfaction and without any hesitation, he pulls out his camera to take a few shots.

“Yes, yes, wonderful! That expression really suits you!”

Anger looks good on you, but he much rather prefers this expression.

He leans in for another kiss and because you can’t say no to him, you indulge him- until you hear footsteps nearby. You hurriedly clamp your hand over his mouth and wait until they’re gone before glaring at him.

“Stop running your mouth so much in public! You’ll give us away at this point!”

“Then stop being so loud,” he hisses back, though he’s in no better state than you, his-already-disheveled hair an absolute mess now from you gripping it. His flushed face is littered with lipstick marks and you can’t resist the temptation to add a few more.

“Cheeky, aren’t you?” he huffs out as you place a lingering kiss to the corner of his mouth. A soft kiss to his eyelid makes his eyes flutter shut and an affectionate sigh escape him. He smells of the chemicals used to develop film and strong coffee…

Then there’s a gasp and the undeniable sound of a camera shutter going off. Caught red handed.

You pull apart from him with a surprised gasp and expression. Strangely, he doesn’t look fazed at all. Still as smug as ever.

You whirl around to see an equally-shocked photographer standing there. Paparazzi, from the looks of it. He was probably going around and looking for some potential shots before accidentally stumbling upon something that would make front-page headlines. When you look back at him, then at the photographer, there’s even more people now snapping away at the two of you in a compromising position.

With the damage already done, you try to leave before he stops you. His jacket resting on your shoulders dwarfs your smaller frame and he yanks on the film strip belt to reel you back in. The crowd of photographers has doubled now, murmuring excitedly to themselves.

“Wh- let go! The paparazzi are having a field day-!”

He silences you with a swift kiss and a pinch to the inner thigh. The cameras flash even more rapidly now.

“Let them see for all I care.”

enjoyed this? my taglist is open!

@ theother-victoria, do not copy, repost, modify, translate, or feed to ai

[jirishnesensei]

geto suguru x reader | college au [18+]

offscript ch.1 be my lead

༺ Pairing. college au - volleyball player! geto x cinematography major! reader (f)

༺ summary - In the chaotic world of college life, you should have expected your drama production to turn south as fast as it did. When your lead actor drops out just weeks before the play, you’re left scrambling to salvage the show that means everything to you. Enter Geto Suguru—talented, charming, and the last person you’d expect to help. But desperate times call for desperate measures, and you find yourself convincing him to step into the spotlight.

༺ warnings/tags - 18+, fluff, angst, smut, fem reader, romance, pining, slow burn, friends to lovers (I guess strangers to friends to lovers), acting, college au, alcohol/drugs, injury, unrequited love, jealousy, Geto is bad at feelings, swearing

༺ status - ongoing

༺ chapters - 1/x

༺ word count - 4.6k

"You belong with me. You've always belonged with me." Emi cried. Her hand is clutched to her heart, and her voice trembles, afraid that her confession may push him away.

Kazuki looks between both her eyes with such yearning. He lifts his hand slowly and sweet, cupping her tear stained cheek as though she were some figment of his imagination.

"I love -"

The actor froze. He swallows thickly, changing his weight between both his legs, then said, "I love." You clutch your pen because he was hesitating.

The stage grew quiet, waiting for his line. You glance at the script in your hand anxiously, and when the actor looks at you, you mouth the line for him, confused because his said it a million times. He looks back at the actress in front of him and you notice how the hand that held her cheek became more rough. His eyes no longer bore weight to the scripts words, and his mouth frowns into a deep, personal scowl.

"Fuck you."

The hall audibly gasps in a chorus, nevermind he had a mini microphone attached to his cheek.

The next second the lecturer is up in arms. Your friend Mai beside you looks at the script to see if there were any line changes she didn't know about, but of course there wasn't.

Cecilia, the actress, has her lips parted just barely in a trembling frown. What you assume to be real tears start streaming down her face as she watches Jean, your actor and her boyfriend, drop the script to the floor, jump off the stage and grab his bag, beelining it straight for the doors.

"What the hell is his problem?" Your friend Mai stands abruptly beside you amidst the chaos. She glares at Jean, then rounds the table and goes straight for Cecilia and you? Well, you wish you could say you had just an inkling of moral to check up on her, but the only realization managing to bypass your conscious is the fact that your only male lead is speeding towards the exit door.

"Wait!" He starts walking faster when you call. You run to his side and grip his arm desperately. "Jean, just wait. Talk to me, what the hell happened?" You look between both his eyes for some kind of answer but now that you were in front of him, the entrance light beaming down the rows of seats, you could just make out the tears that were brimming in his eyes and I don't know, there's just something about men crying that gets you feeling like you're going to cry yourself.

"She cheated." He says, as if it were physically hurting him to pull those words out of his throat.

your eyes widen, and it's the first moment you stop thinking about your play. "she what?"

"She fucking cheated," He laughs pitifully at himself, aggressively wiping his palm against his cheek over and over to the point where it was turning pink. "And you wanna know with who?"

You fumble a couple filler words, expecting him to be rhetorical, but no, he wanted an actual answer. "C'mon, guess. There's only a few people worth fucking over a 4 year relationship for."

You flinch at his tone, "I don't know."

"It was Geto. Geto fucking... I mean what the hell am I supposed to do when she cheats on me with a guy like that?" His voice cracks when he speaks so he quickly turns his head away so you don't notice, but the damage was done, you could hear him sniffling and it made your heart crack into two uneven pieces.

"Shit...I'm..." You straighten up, standing there awkwardly now as he tries to stop himself from crying in front of you. The name he mentions is not foreign to you. Probably not foreign to anybody, really. "... Jean I'm so sorry."

"It doesn't matter." He shakes your arm off of him that you forgot was even still holding on and presses his lips tightly together as if there was so much more he wanted to say, but he doesn't. "I'm sorry, but I can't be in this show anymore. Not when she's - " when he looks at you, all the raw emotion he was letting off was thrown into your face like a reality check that he was not in the right state of mind to negotiate. As someone who does theatre work as her major, emotions were something you learned to pick up on pretty easily and Jeans... you actually felt scared standing before him with just how unpredictable he looked, so you take a step back and nod sympathetically.

"I understand."

Then he leaves. Without another word. Slamming the doors against the wall and leaving it swinging in his wake. When he's out of sight, your mind starts to pick up on all the commotion that's happening behind you. Cecilia is a crying mess on top of the stage, and everybody is out of their positions trying to comfort her or get the tea on what really happened. 

"Hey, what did he tell you?" Your friend Mai finally jogs over, concern written all over her face. You link your hands behind your neck and sigh.

"We just lost our lead."

you cancel the rest of the session. Having no lead made it immensely difficult for you to continue so you pack your bag with your script and belongings uncaringly. Most people have already left except for Mai, but someone walks up to you and you could feel yourself teetering the edge of breaking down.

"I don't know when the next rehearsal will be."

"It's me." Your hands freeze mid stuffing your jacket inside to look up at Cecilia who stood in front of you. Eyes all red and puffy, with faded lines of mascara running down her cheeks. You'd think she was the one that got cheated on. You straighten up and gesture to the chair beside you.

"Do you want to sit?" You offer but she shakes her head. 

"I just-" she takes a deep breath in, ringing her hands together nervously. "I just wanted to apologize to you. Formally. I really messed up and -" she starts to cry again and it took you by surprise, not moving for a few seconds before you quickly walk around your table to offer her a consoling hand.

"sh sh sh, you really don't have to explain."

Mai was a ways to the side, noticing you were preoccupied so she gave a sympathetic look then continued to close up the stage for you. You mouth a 'thank you' to her from over Cecelia's shoulder.

"But aren't you angry with me?" Cece is now wailing into her palms. You try and soothe her by rubbing her back, but it didn't seem to offer much, so you stretch over the table to your tote bag and grab the mini tissue packet for her. She takes it and really goes at it, "I fucked up so bad, but now I ruined your show too. I know you worked so hard on it-"

"Its fine cece." You squeeze her shoulders and bend down a little to look into her eyes. "Seriously, don't worry about it. Do you think I don't have a replacement?"

she sniffles, lifting her head up. "I thought you said you didn't prepare for one?..."

you give her a reassuring smile. "This is the biggest show of my life, of course I prepared for one."

That seems to calm her down a little bit because she's not crying anymore, but still she wipes her eyes. "If I can do anything to help, please let me know." 

You narrow your eyes at her, tucking a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. "You should just go home and rest. I'll call you when rehearsal starts up again."

She suddenly comes in for a tight hug and although you work with her, you don’t really know her personally, so you awkwardly return it with a few pats on the back but then you think she probably really needs it so you squeeze her back instead. When she thanks you and turns to leave, she stops mid-step like she wants to say something.

"um, did he... did he say anything to you when you stopped him?" She can't look into your eyes when she asks. You think it's probably out of guilt, who really knows, but there's this ugly feeling in your chest that makes you think that Jean was probably telling you the truth. You don't want to get into the middle of anything, though, so you shake your head.

"Just that you guys had some problems."

She nods but leaves with a heavy cloud over her head.

---

"Cheated?" Mai scoffs beside you as you and her walked along the colonnade outside campus, a disgusted expression on her face. "And I consoled her."

You weren't listening to much of what she said since you had your own problems to figure out. Like for one, who in the world was going to replace your lead.

"So what're you going to do?" Mai sighs and frowns when she sees how despondent you look, poking at your ice cream in a cup that you bought from some fundraising group in the university. You think it's for the Volleyball team if you're not mistaken.

Despite having told Cece that you had a replacement for Jeans' role, you didn't actually have one. Something about nobody was good enough or whatever high horse reasoning you had at the time.

"do you think I could bribe Mr Sayako into giving me an extension?" You ask Mai and she shakes her head.

"Wouldn't work hun, this was already your extension, remember?"

"Okay sure, but what the hell? he saw what happened up there. How could I have planned for that?"

"I guess it's worth a shot, but what happens if he says no?"

You sigh, then take a mouthfull of your sugary treat and speak through it. "Look for a washed-up new lead, I guess,"

"What? you're just going to give up?" 

"mm," You shake your head, taking the spoon out of your mouth so you could talk, "its not giving up. I'm accepting reality."

"That's giving up." She sweatdrops, watching you juggle your envelope and ice cream in one hand while you fish in your back pocket for your phone.

"whatever." You say, taking it out and already looking for an Uber nearby so you can wallow in your bed with that entire bottle of wine you had planned on popping for your opening night, but that didn't seem like it was going to happen. Mai suddenly takes your shoulder, and it stops you from clicking accept.

"I have a crazy idea." She says. She's peeked your interest enough to make you drop your arm, but you don't respond. "Why don't you ask Geto to be your lead?" 

You deadpan. "are you insane?" it seems the more seconds that go by the more she seems convinced that she actually thought of something brilliant. 

"I went to high school with him and he did a class play once and by the gods he was fucking phenomenal."

"a class play?" You repeat like the word was foreign to your tongue. 

"yeah!"

"Like informal and for marks?"

"Yeah? Why do I feel like you're being condescending."

you look at her funnily. "oh, is that the word?" you stuff your phone back into your pocket. "You can't possibly think because he was good in a class play he'd be good to act in front of an entire audience on a stage in make up and costume?"

"You're not listening to me!" She whines and shakes your shoulders. Her excessive persistence makes you groan, flailing your one unoccupied arm at her to push her away.

"he was fucking great! Like professional great! Every acting club begged for him to join, even I begged him once but he said no cause he was doing volleyball or whatever-" she stops talking when a sports committee student randomly stops her and shoves a flyer into her hands while you continue to walk, "Sure, thanks," she absent-mindedly answers then catches up to you, "seriously, he was really good. I can guarantee you he would be much better than any random person you find now. With all the good actors taken he's your best shot."

You scoff, taking a spoon out of your ice cream again. "best shot..." you mutter then stop walking. "ok fine, lets say he actually is as good as you say he is, what makes you think I can convince him?"

You give her a couple seconds so that the gears could turn in her head, but the disappointment never hits, and her expression changes like a lightbulb flashing yellow, "You can be very persuasive." Is her counterargument.

You raise a brow at her instead of answering, so she gives you one of her meanest glares. "Why are you being so difficult right now?"

"Because I'm not in the mood to make a fool out of myself with someone I don't even know not to mention, incase you forgot, he is literally the reason my first lead quit on me!"

"and some people fuck their CEO to get a promotion!"

"What the hell does that have to do with anything?"

She rolls her eyes impatiently.

"You have been trying to get picked up on your writing for years now. Are you seriously willing to just throw all that away just so you can say a couple of years down the line 'at least I maintained my morals for that play'?" She looks at you genuinely concerned, and it makes you frown.

"No..."

"Then you can't be thinking about everyone else's feelings (y/n). You do what you gotta do."

"But what if-"

"Zip it." She takes your ice cream and it makes you frown harder. "It's just one audition. You miss all the shots you don't take, remember?" 

You press your lips into a tight line and narrow your eyes. Nothing you said would go through her thick skull, and admittedly, a part of you was already convinced. Mai glances down at the flyer in her hand and is about to throw it away when she gasps and starts to shove it in your face.

"You cannot tell me this isn't a sign!"

You send her an irritated look when she doesn't stop the shoving and forcibly pull the flyer out of her hand to read it. And in clear-cut bold, it says:

Volleyball Team try-outs!

The gym will be closed for the next month in order to facilitate the try-outs and training of new team members.

Trials start on the 27th of May and ends on the 21st of June

Make the time and become a part of the Todai Volleyball team!

It was professionally designed with a team photo transparently printed behind the font, too. It was a testiment to just how much the school adored their volleyball team, handing out these flyers to just about anybody that has a pair of hands, going off of the stack that was in that guys arms.

The date, however, was the most jarring because it couldn't have been more perfect, giving Geto, if he had to agree, the perfect opportunity to help you out and not clash with his practices.

Mai gasps, her line of sight just past your head. "Speak of the devil!" She grips your arm and forces your attention to the right. You feel your chest tighten when you see him in all his glory, Geto Suguru, and a few other guys you recognize as a part of the team around him. They just walked out of the econ building and you can already notice the attention they were getting.

Mai is suddenly pushing against your back fervently. "Now's your chance, c'mon! Let's go!"

"What?!" You look back at her like she's gone mental. "Now? You want me to go now?" 

"When else?!"

"I didn't even prepare anything! Don't I only have one shot?!"

"Yes and this is it! You're the most persuasive when you don't overthink anything. Just ask him and don't be a pussy about it!"

She pushes you hard, and it's enough to get you to start walking his way anxiously, looking back at her enthusiastic smile as she gives you two thumbs up like a mum sending her child off to school.

You sigh pitifully, shaking your head. What in the world has your life come to? Just now you had the perfect cast, the perfect script, and now you're going to beg and grovel to someone you've never even spoken to before? you suppose, if he does actually agree by some miracle, then you wouldn't mind. But that was one big miracle and you don't think you've done enough good deeds to warrant that.

You adjust your navy blue headband to neaten out the baby strands that were sticking out. The rowdiness of the group with their deep, masculine laughter, trying to speak over one another was becoming abundantly clear as you neared, although Geto seemed to be the only one that's not trying to scream over his teammates. You neatened your buttoned up white shirt, unrolled your black jersey sleeves, and lifted your pants up with the hoops of the waistband. 

"god... here we go," you mutter. "excuse me." you say loud enough to catch the attention of just the right person right as a guy behind him gave a solid slap on his back and exclaimed a this guys worse, dude before following the group further down the pavement, leaving you alone with Geto.

You give him your best smile, waving your hand but also mentally aware to not actually swoon over him because wow, up close you could just tell he was a man made with love. 

He’s tall, atleast six feet tall which is well above your head and there's a slight sag to his shoulders with effortless bedroom eyes. He has long, thick hair that you'd kill for, tied in a messy high bun that suggests he didn’t bother with it after his practice and he loosely grips a half-empty water bottle, droplets still clinging to the sides with one hand casually inside his long white and blue athletic pants coupled with his sports jacket that's only zipped three-quarter of the way, just enough to reveal a glint of a silver chain resting against his collarbone. The sleeves of his jacket are casually rolled up to his elbows, too, with his one arm sporting a niche black watch that looked like it wouldn't have the numbers on it. You hope you didn't pan up his physique. You just couldn't help but notice how effortlessly stylish he looked, and you started to get your hopes up that maybe Mai was onto something.

You notice he looks a bit pensive by your sudden approach, a light crease forming in his eyebrows as if trying to recognize you, but it quickly disappears the same moment his eyes flicker to your hands that still hold your small admissions envelope that you got signed to book out the hall for your shows opening night.

“I don’t think you know me,” you say, and he naturally switches into this approachable demeanor with a light smile, shaking his head that makes his bangs sway gently.

“No, I don’t think I do.” He turns away from his retreating friends to give you his full attention, and his voice catches you so off guard. You suppose, there’s a delicateness to him that you hadn’t anticipated.

“I’m (y/n),” you introduce yourself. He nods, acknowledging you. “Geto.” he says as if not everybody already knew who he was.

You tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and exhale, suddenly feeling nervous.

“So, listen... I don’t want to waste your time, so I’ll just cut to the chase. I’m producing this show, and I’d really like for you to audition to be my lead -" Your words trail off as you notice his expression change.

"A show?" He repeats. There’s suddenly an intensity in his gaze that makes you want to apologize for even asking because it feels like you’ve wronged him somehow. You just nod. "Yeah...or like a play, whichever works..." 

“Oh.” You hear the disinterest in his tone, but he covers it up with a polite smile, “Thank you, but I’ll have to decline. I’m really busy with volleyball practice.”

"I know you're busy," you cut him off, taking a step closer but remember you can't come off as desperate despite how much you actually are. "my play's opening night is June 23rd, and I know your practices are on hold now for the next month with the trials starting up."

He stares at you for a few seconds, almost like a deer caught in headlights and then he chuckles.

"You really did your homework."

You give him a weak smile, shrugging. "If I'm going to ask you I think it's only safe measure to know my information, right? This wouldn't be just for me either. This would be really good exposure for you too. I have pretty top end agencies attending the play and you never know. They may just be interested in what they see."

He hums, crossing his arms and getting more comfortable on his feet. It takes everything in you to not glance at how nice his arms probably look across his chest.

"But I'm pursuing volleyball, what need would I have for acting agencies?"

"Well, they're not just looking for actors," A gust of wind blows some of your hair over your lips, so you lift your hand to hold it to the side. He notices the movement. "they could use you for the sports magazine, publicize your skills, your credentials. It could easily bring nationwide attention for you to be on that."

You feel a sense of pride when Geto’s demeanor shifts subtly from uninterested to genuinely intrigued. You’ve cast the line, and now you just need to reel him in.

“Hm,” he exhales, shoulders dropping slightly. “How long is it again?”

"one month. Give or take a few days."

"and you want me to audition?"

"Yeah, any day this week is cool but preferably as soon as possible."

He raises a brow and by the tug of his lip you're assuming he found something amusing. "So wait, you are producing what sounds like the most important play of your life and you're only now looking for a lead?"

You flush at his comment, looking away sheepishly at the students exiting the campus doors. Sharp as a knife this one...

"That's a... It's a really long story, but you don't have to worry about that, I have a complete team that's ready to go at a moments notice. I just need my lead."

He taps his finger over his bicep, nibbling on the inside of his cheek as if he's thinking about it and you think you might have convinced him, but then he shakes his head again and this time he's halfway turning around with a hand raised.

"Sorry, but I'm just not interested. Good luck with your search though." then he leaves, catching up with his friends. Your jaw literally drops. He asked all those questions just to fucking say no?! 

In his defense he was surprisingly polite, but you couldn't care less about that as you feel your frustration start to fester, all the events of the day coming to a boiling point. Without thinking and with really nothing to lose, you yell:

"You owe me, you asshole!"

and he turns, so damn fast you're surprised he didn't get whiplash. His face was just screaming for you to repeat that and you did. Gladly.

"You think I don't know? sleeping around with girls that are already taken!?"

you don't even know when it happened or how in the world he moved so fast but you're suddenly pushed back into campus with a very strong hand, dragged into a random empty lecture hall as if you weren't a fully grown adult yourself and then despite how much Geto tried to whisper, he echoed in the large room.

"What the fuck is your problem?" He demands while looming over you and usually you'd be intimidated by a man as dominating as him but in this current moment you could only glare and channel every nerve of frustration into the conversation.

"What the fuck is your problem?!" You press a finger into his hard chest. "Sleeping with someone that's already taken- Do you have any idea how hard I worked, how long I slaved away at this show just to have it ruined because you couldn't keep it in your pants for someone that's available?!"

Geto’s eye twitches, and for a moment, you think he’s going to yell back at you. But instead, he takes a step back, running a hand through his messy hair and forces himself to stay calm.

“Look,” he says, “I don’t know what you think you know, but whatever happened between me and... whoever, it’s not my fault your show is falling apart.”

You let out a bitter laugh, looking away and shaking your head. “Cecilia. And of course, it’s not your fault. It’s never the other person's fault, right? You just waltz into people’s lives, do whatever the hell you want, and leave them and others to deal with the mess.”

Geto’s jaw tightens, his eyes narrowing as he stares down at you. “I didn’t ask that girl to be unfaithful, I didn't even know she was, and I sure as hell didn’t ask to be dragged into this drama. So why don’t you stop blaming me for your problems?”

“oh, my bad, you’re right. You didn’t ask for this so that just means all of the problems you had a hand in just fall away." You take a step closer, teetering the edge of calm and blowing a fuse, " I don't know if anyone's ever told you this, but your actions have consequences you know. Whether you like it or not, you’re part of the reason why things went south. Why I don't have my lead anymore. You could at least try to be an adult about it by taking some responsibility instead of just acting innocent.” Your phone starts buzzing in your back pocket, and you see it's Mai texting you, but you quickly turn it off.

You don't see his expression soften slightly, the tension in his shoulders easing as he considers your words. “And you really think being in your play is going to make up for it?”

Your ears perk when you hear the opportunity in his voice and you look back at him, noticing how he seems to be considering you, “It’s a start,” you plead, “I know it’s a long shot, but it’s all I’ve got. I’ve worked so hard on this, and I’m not ready to give it all up when I'm so close to the end."

You watch his chest rise and fall with a deep breath as he turns his head to look away from you and instead at the empty seats in the lecture hall. Long lashes flutter against the top of his cheeks every time he blinks. You hate the fact that you think about how unfairly attractive he is in the moment. After a long pause, he finally looks back at you, his expression unreadable.

“Fine,” he says quietly and your eyes widen. “I’ll audition. But that’s all I’m promising. If I don’t like it, I’m out.”

You can't control how shocked you look when he acquiesces. Honestly, you didn't expect anything out of this after calling him out the way you did and just started running your mouth to let off some steam, but maybe he really did feel bad. “s-seriously? Oh my god, thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet,” he warns, the seriousness in his tone cutting through your relief. “Like I said, this doesn’t mean I’m committed. I’ll give it a shot, but if I’m not into it, that’s it.”

“I understand,” you say, quickly nodding. “That’s all I’m asking.”

Geto takes a step back, leaning on the edge of the lecturers table with one palm holding his wrist. “So when should I come in to audition?”

"Uh-... " Your mind runs blank, you hadn't expected to come this far. You scramble for your phone to check the schedule you’d painstakingly put together, but not a single slot was available. "How's tomorrow afternoon?" You look at him.

Geto raises an eyebrow. “Afternoon works. What time are we talking?”

You tap on your phone screen with your painted nail, trying to appear confident despite the nerves. “How about 4pm?”

“Sounds good," he tilts his head and his eyes get smaller like he's plotting something. "but only if you agree to one condition.”

"condition?”

"yes," a witty smile plays on his lips. “I want an iced coffee,"  His shoulders raise as he shrugs. "It's the least you could do after nearly tarnishing my name out there."

You blink, momentarily taken aback by such an innocent request. “uh, yeah sure. I can do that. Is that all?"

He gives you a pointed look before he walks over to you. You feel yourself straighten by the approach. "You make it sound like that's an easy condition, but I'm a very hard man to satisfy." He stops in front of you, and you have to crane your neck to keep eye-contact. "But for now, yes." his eyes flicker between yours and the faint smell of cologne consumes you. "That's all."

You get a bit overwhelmed by his unwavering eyes so you look away into your tote bag. You swear he becomes just a little bit smug by it. "And, um, here’s the script." You pull out your personal script since it was the only one you had on hand. When Geto looks at the worn-out, slightly crumpled script covered in handwritten notes, annotations, and sticky tabs, his gaze softens, and he takes it tentatively from you.

“I know it looks like a mess, but it’s got all the notes and directions you’ll need. Just ignore the scribbles if they get in your way—most of it is just me trying to make sense of everything.” You adjust your bag strap sheepishly while Geto cards through the pages with his thumb. 

"You're really passionate about this." He glances at you and you're not even paying attention to him anymore. Your eyes are trained on the script in his hands like it was your holy bible and it might as well have been.

"Hm, I've been working on it since the start of the semester. I'm hoping to get picked up with this bad boy." You look back at him, and you're suddenly giving off a much softer vibe. He thought how strange it was that you saw no issue in handing over probably your most prized possession to a complete stranger. He sighs and then tucks the script to his side. "I’ll see you at the audition, then.”

You smile back at him. "hm, see you then. And thank again. Really."

he hums and walks past you to the door, brushing his arm against yours where you could feel the cold fabric touch your skin, the tension in your chest finally starts to ease. Just as he reaches the exit, he pauses and glances back at you.

“And for the record,” he adds, his voice carrying easily across the empty room, “you’ve got guts. Not many people would call me out like that.”

With that, he leaves, the door clicking shut behind him. You stand there for a moment, still processing everything that just happened. Your heart is still racing, but it’s no longer from anger or frustration. It’s from a strange, tentative hope that maybe, just maybe, things might work out after all. When you leave the class you're surprised to see Mai just a meter away, gnawing at her nails with the most horrified expression on her face. When she sees you she doesn't waste time to grab your arm and drag you out of the campus building. "I told you to convince him to audition, not fucking call him out, you idiot!"

You laugh at her, holding her hand that's on your forearm. "Do I have some good news for you."

✧You're all caught up!

[aayakashii]

“Favorite movie.” Ren asks, staring at his cellphone's screen instead of you.

You purse your lips, thinking about it for a second, before coming up with your answer.

“Frances Ha.”

He scoffs.

“Frances what? Is this one of those cult french movies? Are you trying to sound intellectual right now? Be for real.”

You roll your eyes and look up from your own phone, where you were writing Ren's own answers to the 20 questions game you were forcing him to play.

Haru had almost begged you to try and actually become Ren's friend, just like a concerned father with a problem child. How could you possibly say no to one of the few people who liked you?

Ren isn't a problem child, though. He's just incredibly, terribly, horribly annoying.

“It's not a cult movie. Maybe if you didn't watch only B-horror movies, you'd know about it” you stick out your tongue and flip your middle finger at him.

The “Become friends with Ren” plan was going great.

“Oh yeah? Then tell me about it and I'll be the judge of whether or not it's worth watching.” he flips his own middle finger back at you and then grabs a chip from the ridiculously big bowl of snacks you had prepared for the game. You were pretty sure you had depleted Darkwick's stock of chips just to be sure you had at least one type Ren would like.

Hey, no one could ever say you'd ever half-ass a mission after all. Maybe Leo could. But he doesn't count.

“Since when are you the judge of whether or not movies are good? You'd give Rubber an Oscar if you could.”

Ren gasps at the mention of that movie, almost choking with the handful of chips he had stuffed in his mouth.

“You know Rubber?!” he mumbles almost incoherently in between chews.

“The horror movie about a freaking homicidal car tire? Yeah, Ren, I think everyone knows about that movie because it's basically a meme… You're the only one that takes it seriously” you sigh, shaking your head. Why weren't you surprised that he knew and liked that abomination. What was wrong with him. God.

He sneers at you, shrugging.

“You just don't get the irony of it. The sarcasm! And you also can't appreciate the special effects, okay? Don't blame me just because you're a close minded uncultured human.”

You groan loudly.

“Oh goooood, before you try to fight for that movie's honor, can we please continue the game?” you say, exasperated.

“Not before you tell me why you like the cult french movie.” he puts his phone on the table face down and dramatically crosses his arms, adamant about continuing on the same topic. Suddenly you could understand why Towa called him Wolfsbane.

“It's not french!” you sigh “Fine, what do you want to know?”

Ren hums in thought for a moment, tapping his chin with his index finger.

“Why do you like it?” he finally asks, and you widen your eyes.

You weren't actually expecting him to ask why you liked the movie. You thought he'd ask about the plot or the cast or the cinematography, but not about your personal connection to it. Maybe it was just a whim or pure and random curiosity, but you still grab that and run with the idea that he is finally warming up to you and getting interested in knowing about his new “friend”. Haru would probably accept that as a sign too.

“I… relate to the main character, I think. She's, uh. Messy, has a hard time with relationships and all that.” you try to answer, avoiding his gaze and scratching your head. How much could you share with him, truly? Does he REALLY want you to step on a soap box and tell all of the reasons why you like the movie and why you relate to the main character? You hardly see Ren as someone who likes emotional or deep things if his disdain for cult movies is anything to go by. So you just say the bare minimum.

Ren deadpans.

“Wow, you gave me so much information to work with right now.” he says, voice dripping with sarcasm.

You roll your eyes.

“Do you really want to know why I like it?”

“Well, yeah? That's why I asked?” Ren raises an eyebrow.

Huh. Okay, I guess. Here goes nothing, you think.

“Okay. There's this monologue in which she talks about what she wants from love.”

Ren groans, loud and dramatic, slapping his own forehead.

“Nooooooo! Not the cheesy shit!”

You shush him, getting flustered in spite of yourself.

“Goddammit Ren, I KNEW you'd act like this! But you asked! Now let me finish!” you croak, embarrassed, avoiding his eyes.

“She says she wants to love someone in such a way that... when her eyes meet the eyes of that person, even if they're distant or in a crowd, they know they have something special. Like there's a whole secret world between them. Then she would know that that is her person in this life.”

You pause for a moment.

“And in the end, you find out that this special person, for her, is actually her best friend! I like this idea, you know. This depiction of- of love. And that's… uh, that's it.” you finish, clearing your throat and getting more embarrassed with every word you said.

Ren stares at you in silence for a long while after you finish.

“Well?” you ask, anxiously.

He stretches his arms wide, elbows and shoulders popping after being hunched over the table for so long, and then leans back on his chair, folding his hands in front of him.

“Well. It is some cheesy shit after all.” Ren says, flatly.

And then he starts laughing.

Ohhhh, this JERK. You spilled your most personal thoughts about your favorite movie right in front of him and he had THE GALL to laugh and mock you!

You grab a handful of chips and quickly throw them at him. He shields himself with his hands, still laughing.

“Hey! That's harassment! Abuse of power!” He says in between his laughs. “I'll call Ritsu! I'll sue you! I have a case against you!”

“You're insufferable!” you yell, cheeks tingling with embarrassment, and you hide your mouth with your hands to keep him from seeing the small smile that was appearing on your lips at the sound of his laugh.

Right as you were going to grab another handful of chips to throw at him, the entrance door slams open, and Haru saunters in. The red head gasps loudly at the scene unfolding in front of him.

“Ohhh, will you look at that! Ren laughing! Now that's a sight for sore eyes!” Haru says, voice brimming with joy.

“Ugh… The creep is back” Ren quickly morphs back into his gloomy mood like his happy switch had been turned off at the mere sight of Jabberwock's captain.

He grabs his phone, putting it inside his pocket, before grabbing a handful of chips from the bowl.

“Wait, you're leaving? We barely started the game!” you protest, picking up the chips that had fallen to the ground during your "attack".

“Yeah, he ruined the mood, obviously” Ren says, rolling his eyes and quickly making way to the stairs that led to the bedrooms.

“Awww, don't be shy to interact with your friend, Ren!” Haru says, blatantly winking at you at the word ‘friend’.

Ren only grumbles a complaint, to which Haru just sighs and shakes his head. He turns to you, immediately changing the subject to some errand he would love to get some help since his dorm mates definitely weren't going to fulfill their responsibilities at all and how you are the only one he can trust.

As Haru goes on and on about how you'd be a lifesaver if you just lent him a hand for a moment, your eyes flit towards the top of the stairs.

Ren was slowly dragging his feet through the last steps, lazily looking down at where you were standing.

Your eyes meet despite the distance between you two and, even though he blushes, startled, when you meet his stare, he sustains your gaze.

You smile.

Get it? Get it? Please tell me you got the end

Anyway here's the monologue mentioned in this fic! Frances Ha isn't my favorite movie but I love it deeply <3 wrote this on a whim because there's barely any Ren love here! I know he's this close 🤏 to being an incel but we can fix him 😔

[lucid-loves]

First Light ~ Simon "Ghost" Riley Part 5

Pairing: bodyguard!Ghost x princess!reader (fem!reader)

Word Count: 4.2k

CW: angst, violence, blood, strong language, scars, verbal abuse by parents, physical abuse by parents, psychological abuse by parents, opposites attract, forbidden love, slow burn, fluff, attraction and sexual tension, reader POV and ghost POV, minors DNI, smut, virgin reader, first kiss

Let me know if I missed any CWs.

Story Synopsis: After receiving death threats from a mysterious terrorist organization, your royal parents make a decision to reach out to the United States for help. Specifically, they want the US to send a bodyguard to protect their precious princess. When the 141 is called upon to investigate, Ghost is the one assigned to protect you. With your lack of experiences outside of your royal life and his experience with nothing but deadly, worldly affairs, opposites attract.

Chapter Synopsis: You are having a blast doing what you want to do for the first time in your life. However, the longer you live with Ghost, the stronger the tension between you gets. One night, curiosity gets the better of you and Ghost can’t help but satiate it for you. 

Part 1 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4 ~ Part 5 ~ Part 6 ~ Part 7

Ghost watched you watching your movie with a slight smirk under his mask. While you have already seen him without the mask a couple of times already, he still felt more comfortable with the mask. Especially since he was technically still working. While he has been having fun watching you run around the safehouse enjoying new knowledge, he still had to stay on his toes. Your life was still in danger as far as he knew. 

You were wrapped up in a fluffy blanket on the couch, your eyes trained on the screen that flashed movie scenes that were once banned for you. Since day one, you have been desperate to fit as many banned activities as you possibly could before you would go back, whenever that was. Watching movies was part of those activities along with listening to diverse music, exploring the wonders of the world wide web, and trying new foods that weren’t exactly the healthiest. 

In your hands while you watched the movie was a small journal and pen where you took notes. For you, this was more about enjoying the contraband. This was research. You took notes on the cinematography when it came to shows and movies. You took notes on the melodies and harmonies when it came to music. You took notes on ingredients and flavor when it came to new food. 

Anything and everything was a research opportunity in some way. And Ghost admired that about you. You weren’t too naive despite growing up the way you did. You picked up on things rather quickly, especially when you were in a groove. Now that you were free, you didn’t hold back in demonstrating just how smart and competent you were. He figured that if you weren’t a princess, you’d be a scientist of some sort. 

He suppressed a chuckle as you gasped and jumped from a jumpscare on the screen, the horror movie clearly getting to you. Not that you were silly for being scared. The original Psycho was a fantastic piece of cinematography from the horror genre. The lighting work, the script, the acting, and the camera angles all contributed to creating the creepiest horror movie that has stood the test of time. 

You wrote down your experience in your notebook, excited to add to your research. Just before the credits began to roll, Ghost walked over and sat himself next to you on the couch. The couch dipped under his weight, reminding you of how big a man he is. You scooted over, making sure to give him enough space that he took up. 

When the credits began to roll, you stretched your arms above your head to help out your back. Ghost stared at how your graceful arms raised up high, how your back arched slightly. He noticed how flawless your skin looked. It was no surprise that you had scarless skin. At the same time, though, you looked unbelievably soft to touch. 

Ghost had been thinking about that more often within the past week and a half. It was hard not to think about it as you became comfortable within the space. You wore more casual yet cute clothes, you carried yourself more easily, and you have been more active in maintaining the temporary home. Not to mention that you have been wearing that hair clip he bought you just about every day, exposing the nape of your neck. 

He wanted to snake his arms around your waist, pull you close into his lap, and kiss your bare shoulders. The desire passed as you looked at him suddenly. “Would you like to choose the next movie?”

“Me?” He questioned, surprised by your offer. Ghost hasn’t had much time to see a lot of movies. He’s seen the classics and some modern popular films, but his job didn’t exactly allow him time to really indulge in any binge watching of any kind. 

“I was planning on choosing a romance to directly compare the cinematography differences since I expect the contrast to be quite stark. However, if you would like to watch something else, I don’t mind.” You warmly smiled, happy to have Ghost join you in your movie binge. 

You had been trying your best to give him space since he was still taking his job very seriously. You were also trying to keep your crush on him under control by keeping a healthy distance. Though, you still always craved his attention. You wanted to spend time with him. Get to know him. Now was the time to perhaps learn something new about him.

Ghost held his chin in thought for a moment before grabbing the remote off from the coffee table. It didn’t take him long to find the movie he thought would be best for the both of you. Your small smile turned into a large grin as he started Casablanca.

“Is this your favorite movie?” You inquired curiously.

“It’s the best romance movie in my opinion. Not particularly my all time favorite, but it’s up there and a first choice if I’ll be watching a romance. Besides, it would probably serve as a good film to study alongside Psycho since they’re around the same era of film.” He explained, not realizing how easy it was to talk to you about his personal opinions.

You snuggled back into the couch, getting cozy once again for a new movie. The both of you sat in comfortable silence as the film played, feeling a sense of ease in each other’s presence. As the film progressed, you only became more and more entranced in the wonderful story on screen. 

It was hard not to sympathize and empathize with Ilsa. To swoon with her, smile with her, and cry with her. The acting was impeccable. It almost felt real. Especially when Ilsa asked Rick for a kiss for the final time without him knowing. A sharp pain went through your heart as they closed the distance, your notebook and pen falling into your lap. The bittersweet romance made you think of your own inexperience. 

You haven’t thought of it much before. Yes, you did read a few contraband romance books here and there. However, there were more important things to you besides finding a partner you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. It wasn’t until the event with the Duke that you began to think about it a little more each night. You were a grown woman. A capable, smart, curious, and slightly rebellious woman. Yet, you still haven’t had your first kiss. It was starting to make you feel like you were missing out on something in life.

“Hey, you okay?” Ghost called out to you, noticing how pained and distracted you were. He paused the movie for a moment so he could completely focus on you. 

“Ah, pardon me. I was just thinking about something serious.” You apologized, your cheeks flushing a bit. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” He offered, causing your cheeks to turn even more pink. While you have been feeling more comfortable talking to your bodyguard, it was still a little embarrassing to talk about the romantic things on your mind. It was hard to refuse him though. You knew that he was genuinely concerned about you. 

Curiosity was getting the better of you too. You wanted to know what kissing was like. If Ghost had ever kissed someone before. He probably has given his age and ability to actually see the world. The image of him kissing someone made you a little sick to your stomach too. Oh god, what if he has a girlfriend back home? Or a wife?!

You took a deep breath, trying to calm your silly anxieties. If this were to be truly resolved, then you needed to speak up. Hopefully Ghost won’t judge you too much. “I. . . I was thinking about how I haven’t had my first kiss yet. . .”

He quirked a brow under his mask, not expecting that confession to come out of your mouth. He didn’t even occur to him before that you thought about those kinds of things. “Something like that bothers you?”

Your cheeks began to feel like they were on fire. He didn’t say it in a judgemental tone, but it was still very embarrassing to admit. “It doesn’t so much as bother me, but I do feel like I am missing out on something. Most women my age have already had their first kiss. Probably a lover. Some may already have children. I know that I’ve been locked away for most of my life so it isn’t my fault. Still though, I can’t help but wonder about it.”

“I can understand where you are coming from. Most people get curious about things like that eventually.” He reasoned, hoping that his understanding would make you feel better. It was obvious that you were getting uncomfortable talking about something like this with him. Your shoulders were tense, your cheeks were pink, and you stared down into your lap where your thumbs twiddled. 

“May I ask how your first kiss was?” You pried in a cautious tone.

Now it was Ghost’s shoulders that were tensing up. Besides feeling the instinct of keeping his privacy that he so strongly protects, it also didn’t feel entirely appropriate to talk about his experience with you. You were still a princess by nature. Plus he was still working.

It was hard to say no to you though. 

With a deep sigh, he leaned back into the couch. “I was a teenager. There was a neighbor who’s granddaughter came to visit every once in a while. She kissed me one night when we were hanging out. We fooled around until she left to go to college. Haven’t seen her since.”

You bit the inside of your cheek as you listened to his story. A part of you was glad that he left out the more intimate details. Another part of you wanted to know what his true feelings were within those moments. “Were you heartbroken when she left?”

“Not particularly. I already knew what was going to happen by the end of that summer. We didn’t really kiss out of mutual feelings either. It was more so just. . . curiosity.” He elaborated further, somehow finding it easy to tell you about these things than he expected.

“Have you ever fallen in love then?” You asked before you could think. 

This caused Ghost to tense up again, his heart skipping a beat. He didn’t know why, but the first thing that came to his mind when you asked was your name. Not even a yes or no. Just your name that danced at the tip of his tongue. 

He felt his body grow warm as he swallowed your name down, not ready to acknowledge what it probably meant. “I had a girlfriend several years back. Hard to maintain a relationship with my job.”

“I see. My apologies.” You lowered your head, somehow feeling like it was your fault that your bodyguard can’t settle down with someone. Like you were keeping him away from a lover that didn’t exist. 

He noticed how depressed you seemed about his answer. He didn’t mean to make you feel bad. “It’s just part of the job. And I won’t say that I was completely innocent in the breakup.”

You hugged your knees to your chest, unsure how to respond to his confession for a moment. You never really asked about his work before. All you really knew was that he was in the military and was one of the best at his job. Now that you thought about it, though, he probably had to move around a lot. He had to travel all the way to your country after all. 

“Did you want to experience your first kiss?” Ghost asked, switching the attention back onto you. The question made your heart feel like it was tripping over itself with how fast it pounded. At the tip of your own tongue, you wanted to admit that you wanted to experience your first kiss with him.

“Um. . .” You hesitated, feeling the butterflies in your stomach turn into a hurricane. It felt like your brain was malfunctioning. Still, Ghost waited patiently for your answer. Silently. 

He didn’t mind waiting. It just meant that he got to see just how flustered you were. While he did feel partially guilty for being the reason why you were embarrassed, he also secretly enjoyed it. It was too much of a treat to see just how pink your cheeks could get. It made him want to tease you. 

Finally, you raised a hand up to your face to try to cover your blush. You were just getting way ahead of yourself. “It’s not nice to tease a princess, you know?”

He wasn’t expecting you to say something so cute and cool at the same time. 

At that moment, Ghost wanted to pounce. Hover his weight above your body and give you a kiss you would never forget. Nibble on your kissable lips while you shivered underneath him. Or he could pull you into his lap and slide his tongue into your pretty mouth. Slide his hands along your waist as he tasted you. You probably tasted devine. Sweet.

He had to bite his tongue hard in order to get his mind out of the gutter. After that, however, he couldn’t help but chuckle. You were so much more full of surprises than he realized. 

Your eyes widened as he laughed. What could be so funny? Was what you said really that comical? Thankfully, your bodyguard was willing to explain. “Sorry, Princess. I don’t mean to laugh at you. What you said was just cool. I didn’t expect it.”

The attention went back to you, Ghost clearly not willing to let this go just yet. It was a little strange. You have never seen your bodyguard so playful before. Relaxed. It made your insides feel like they were melting. While you couldn’t see it with the mask, you knew he was smiling. At the very least, you could tell he was through his eyes. “Anyway, do you?”

You almost forgot what you were talking about until he brought it up again. It seemed that you weren’t going to escape this. “Well. . . yes. However, I don’t think it’s going to happen anytime soon.”

“What about with me?” Ghost slipped up. He gauged your reaction swiftly, trying to figure out if you heard him or not. If you didn’t he could save face.

You did hear him though. Loud and clear. It wasn’t like there were many distractions that would cause you to miss what he said. The movie was on pause. There was no sound but the conversation at hand. 

This was dangerous territory. Saying no would result in losing your chance to not only experience your first kiss, but also miss a kiss with your crush. If you said yes, then the professional boundary of princess and bodyguard would be broken. That could lead into a whole whirlwind of issues if things were to progress. Or if the kiss was found out.

No, you could keep a secret. You have been keeping secrets for years. There were even some secrets that Ghost didn’t know about yet. You were sure that with his occupation and general character, the lieutenant could keep a secret to his grave. 

Could you excuse the kiss for research purposes? Accepting a kiss would satiate your curiosity on the subject. For now at least. Besides, the safest way to explore this was probably with the man that has been keeping you safe. He wouldn’t do anything you weren’t comfortable with or even sure of. 

This was your chance. You couldn’t miss it. “If you wouldn’t mind, then yes. . .”

It took everything out of Ghost to not pull you in right then and there. He didn’t even think you would say yes. However, he had to be sure. You had to be sure. “You positive? There’s no taking it back once it’s done.”

You seriously considered it again for a second before nodding, not much more confident and sure of yourself on this. “Yes. Only if you are willing.”

Oh, he was willing. He craved it. Slowly, he took off his mask, allowing you to see the face you didn’t even realize you missed. Your heart picked up speed. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion as a surreal feeling took over. Was this really happening? Your first kiss? With your bodyguard?

As much as you wanted to just keep admiring his handsome face, you closed your eyes, waiting for him to make the first move. You felt the cushions on the couch shift as he moved to a more comfortable position. You felt his body heat become more noticeable as he got closer. 

You flinched slightly as his hand cupped your cheek, the feeling of his skin on yours sending fireworks through you. Ghost was feeling the magnetic pull too. Just as he thought, your skin was silky smooth. Your lashes were delicately long and your lips begged to be kissed already. He felt his own heart thud loudly within his chest as he got closer and closer.

He let his lips lightly brush against yours, not wanting to startle you too much. At first contact, your heart soared. Naturally, you leaned forward to really close the distance, feeling your bodyguard’s lips perfectly fitting against yours. 

Soft, sweet, thrilling. You wanted more. You really wanted more. Ghost felt the same way as he got lost in the way your lips felt. So perfect. So flawless. Without thinking, he deepened the kiss, pressing his lips firmer against yours. 

A subtle moan came from your throat, pleasure spreading across your body. Your lips moved in sync with his, despite this kiss being your first. It was amazing how warm you felt, how sparks flew. It was exactly what your romance novels described. It made you want to try the other intimacies you’ve read too. 

As much as Ghost wanted to keep kissing you, he had to pull back. He was getting too lost at the moment. Any more and he could completely lose control. This was meant to give you new knowledge. A favor. He couldn’t enjoy it as much as he was. 

The absence was devastating though. As soon as his lips left yours, you felt a terrible pain in your heart. It broke your heart that this could be your first and last kiss with him. Your bodyguard felt that strain too deep within his soul. 

He cleared his throat before speaking, trying to relieve the romantic tension that still lingered in the air. “Well, was it what you were expecting? Gonna write it down for your notes?”

You scooted back, creating distance between the two of you. It felt like he was an ocean away. “It was pleasant. I see why people like doing it. I may write about this a little later.”

An awkward silence fell as the both of you tried to ignore the magnetic pull. Ghost scolded himself for getting too close. He really shouldn’t have even entertained the idea of kissing you, but he couldn’t help it. His attraction to the beautiful princess next to him was consuming his mind, body, and soul. The kiss only heightened it.

You reached forward towards the remote and put the movie back on, hoping that this would distract the both of you from your intense attraction.

It helped somewhat as the movie audio filled the silence. However, while your eyes were trained on the screen, your mind was as chaotic as a hurricane. You loved kissing Ghost. You craved it now just like how you have been constantly craving his attention. 

This didn’t feel like this was just a crush on your bodyguard anymore.

Bittersweet, romantic music swelled as Ilsa and Rick said their final goodbyes and finally reached closure with each other. Ghost turned towards you once again, watching your reaction to the end. As he waited, he couldn’t help but gaze upon your lips. 

You felt his eyes on you, something that you were getting better at detecting. Turning your head to meet his gaze, you realized that he seemed closer than before. Did he move closer without you realizing it? Or did you?

Credits began to roll, the sweet music still filling the quiet. Before he could stop himself, Ghost had cupped your cheek, his thumb gently rubbing your skin. God, you were gorgeous. A princess from another world. Away from his world. Just looking into your sparkling eyes helped him escape the traumas in his life. 

On his own, he saw blood, guns, death everywhere. With you, he saw life blossoming from the ashes of the world. 

His lips crashed into yours, no longer caring if this was crossing the line. For now, he wanted that temporary escape. That fantasy of being with you. Of you being his.

You closed your eyes as he kissed you greedily, your arms looping around his neck. Your heart threatened to break out of your chest as he kissed you how he wanted. A real kiss. His kiss. You could feel every cell in your body melt under his touch. 

His hands moved down to your waist where he lifted you into his lap. Straddling him gave you an exciting rush of pleasure that traveled all the way down to the tips of your toes. Strong, large hands felt you up, sending shivers down your spine.

He nibbled your lower lip for a moment, making you moan not so subtly this time. Taking advantage of the situation, he slipped his tongue into your mouth. The pace wasn’t as greedy as he tasted you further. He slowed down to not startle you. But god damn did he want to take all of you. He wanted to take all of your firsts. This was shown with just how deeply he kissed you.

Your grip around his neck tightened as your tongue slid against his. Your chest pressing against his didn’t help the now sexual tension growing. His body felt amazing. Strong, defined muscles with the perfect touch of softness. True strength and power that has protected you. 

You could feel your sex tingle with need.

Ghost pulled back to give you a moment to breathe. He also was feeling himself responding to the sexual tension. It took everything in him not to start grinding into you. The side effect of holding back was gripping your hips tightly to hold you close. 

Feeling weak and out of breath, you leaned against him further, your head pressing against his shoulder. As the both of you began to calm down, his grip loosened. His hands now traveled around your back and waist, hugging you to provide more comfort.

Once your breath became steadier, he placed a kiss against the side of your head. He could tell that you were tired now. He did just take a lot of energy from you. “Why don’t you go take a nap in your room. I’ll be getting some work done.”

Your brows furrowed out of his vision. It hurt that he was sending you away so quickly. But, you did need a moment to think. Regain some energy too. With that realization, you then realized that Ghost was just being courteous to you. 

Slowly, you got off of his lap and headed to your room, fighting the urge to turn around. At the same time, Ghost fought the urge to pull you against him again. As soon as he heard the closing click of your door, he gave a loud sigh. He was really in it now.

You laid yourself down onto your bed, the phantom touch of Ghost still lingering. It felt like his arms were still wrapped around you. Like his lips were brushing against yours. You rubbed your thighs together unconsciously as you recalled everything about your sudden makeout with your bodyguard.

It didn’t take long for you to bury your face into the pillow, muffling your moans as you touched your slick pussy to the thought of him.

Before you were a princess, you were a woman after all. 

[ominous-feychild]

✦ MY WRITEBLR INTRODUCTION ✦

Hey! I've been here for a while and I've somehow amassed a shocking amount of followers and mutuals, so I figured it's finally time for me to force one of these out for you guys!

(And you know... a masterpost... when I get around to it. 😅😭)

About me:

✦ Barlowe (she/her)

✦ In my early 20s

✦ A writer of 10 years ✦ working on novels for 6 of 10!

✦ Less dedicated to—but still interested in!—drawing, animation, photography, and cinematography

✦ AuDHD and a grey lesbian (aka I'm leaning asexual) ✦ (my writing may or may not be a special interest)

✦ I have a whole bunch of other neurodivergencies besides AuDHD but I don't think y'all want me to get into all of them, haha. ✦ oh, and I say "haha" a lot. I apologize in advance.

✦ I think I'm hilarious and make jokes constantly

✦ I use a lot of emojis and tone tags to help convey tone. Please forgive me if it's annoying, it's to cope with my inability to communicate. /lh /hj

Masterlists:

✦ General ✦ Worldbuilding ✦ Sun and Shadow ✦ The Arcane Rifts ✦ Rising From the Ashes

(will be added eventually)

My Obsessions:

✦ Fantasy, horror, mystery, action, and exploration of realistic characters' reactions to the things they go through.

✦ Fairy tales, mythology, and folklore

✦ "Ye Olde History" and language

✦ DIVERSITY!!!

✦ Explorations of "evil-coded" characters and abilities--aka, not just showing them as evil. Show them as people (for characters) and tools (for abilities)!

✦ Traumatizing my characters just like I've been

✦ Traumatizing my characters in ways I haven't been!

✦ Learning!!!

✦ Talking way too much about the things I like to the point that I need to make a whole separate post to share it so it doesn't clutter my intro post... oh, hey, why is this linked?

✦ THE AESTHETIC!!!!

My Aesthetics:

Those who've been following me for a bit probably know that I adore "the aesthetic" and try to make my posts look nice... even if there's no real reason to besides that it gives me a little serotonin. Here's my favorite aesthetics!

✦ Starry; night sky ✦ Dawn / dusk ✦ Sunrise / sunset

✦ Nature! ✦ Forestry ✦ Cottagecore ✦ Rustic ✦ Ocean

✦ Literally all of them, please and thank you

My Writing:

✎ Sun and Shadow

Everything goes wrong for Freya Ula when she leaves her simple life as a fisherwoman to get engaged overseas. Her ship gets wrecked, she finds out her dad's been hiding secrets from her for her whole life, and, oh, she gets framed for a terrorist attack. Wait, WHAT!? After the city's greatest detective is attacked and disappears before she could consult with him, Frey has to enlist the help of his kid and her would-be fiancée to find out who framed her and clear her name. If only Crow was half as good a detective their dad was supposed to be.

Main characters: Freya, Crow, Daleira

✦ Urban-esque high fantasy ✦ purposely very tropey in places ✦ however, as always, I love throwing in curveballs. Wonder what's played straight and what I'm going to emotionally destroy you with. Definitely won't be Crow.

✦ Slow-burn romance between Frey and Crow ✦ immediate interest between Frey / Daleira ✦ oh, look, it's a love triangle? ✦ JOKE'S ON YOU, IT'LL ACTUALLY BE POLY ✦ it's just... going to take a while.

✦ Lesbians, lesbians everywhere ✦ though Crow is actually genderfluid and uses they/them for the first book ✦ despite barely having anything written I've already plotted a bit of book 2 ✦ I desperately need help.

✦ Unsurprisingly is a detective mystery with action mixed in ✦ I'm not typically a romance writer, I excel in action fantasy ✦ please have mercy on my soul

✦ Lots of magic, it's high fantasy + victorian aesthetic ✦ (aka "gaslamp fantasy" if you've heard of it) ✦ Frey's got sun-themed magic ✦ gasp, I know ✦ Crow's got shadow magic ✦ wonder why this sounds familiar ✦ Daleira's got, hm, well it's also shadowy! ✦ spoilers 😘

✦ About to be updated en-masse for a writing contest!!!

✎ The Arcane Rifts

Ghosts of past tragedies haunt the town of Kavo after decades of neglect. Fantastical creatures desiring nothing but fear and destruction hide in invisible tears in reality. Gangs and the police are at constant war with one another, there's a shapeshifting monster running amok, and the mayor's assistant suddenly wants a disabled orphan kicked to the streets. A year ago, Gene was discovered in the forest on the outskirts of town, half dead, amnesiac, and unable to even speak the local language. As he had nowhere to go, he was brought to the orphanage of Kavo for a place to stay. Now Caspar, the assistant of the mayor and the man who funds the orphanage, wants him kicked out. When Gene's left to the cold, cruel streets of Kavo on his own, he has to navigate through a town ravaged by decades of neglect and intrigue. Has the corruption truly been purged from the government? Why are godly forces active in Kavo, a small town in a backwater country? And most importantly--will Gene survive?

Main Characters: Gene, Tazin, Mislav, Ludmila, Rada ❧ Gene and Tazin for book 1 ❧ the other 3 start being MCs books 2 and 3 ❧ I guess Nikolai is also a MC tho

❧ Industrial-era rustic high fantasy ❧ mixes fantasy, action, horror, and mystery! ❧ oh helloooooo "ominous feychild" origin? ❧ very strong folkloric and traditional fantasy inspo ❧ except I mean "traditional fantasy" as in ❧ "we don't understand this magic stuff but we're used to it" ❧ not "travel the world adventures!"

❧ VERY involved story with strong themes of discrimination, poverty, exploitation, trauma, and the recovery from trauma ❧ each main and secondary character is one flavor of discriminated against or another in-universe ❧ obviously I try to write it respectfully, but you can't really write bigots being bigots "respectfully"

❧ Has two "main plots" going on simultaneously; technically three ❧ I periodically give the reader updated "character guides" ❧ like they get more recent plot info added kinda like a red-string board to keep you, the audience, up-to-date with info you might've otherwise missed ❧ I think it's really cool and people seem to enjoy it ❧ I know it seems like a lot but please give it a chance

❧ I've literally plotted out pretty much the entirety of the first and second books, and know most of how book 3 will go, yet there's very little out for the current version of the story ❧ part of that is because I'm paused on the 3rd draft

❧ There's lots of timeskips throughout the first two books, but they're mostly to age up the protagonists! Gene, the MC, starts the series at 7. I promise it's not a kid's story though.

❧ The "secondary MC", Nikolai, is the police chief investigating magical stuff going on at the same time. They tie in with the main story involving Gene, though won't appear to for a long while.

❧ The "golden child" series I love more than SaS; however it's on hiatus because I promised people to work on SaS first and SaS is more popular as a romance-focused story. :/ ❧ I would never be salty about that.

Taglist:

For everything: @honeybewrites @the-golden-comet @illarian-rambling @ashirisu @urnumber1star

@the-letterbox-archives @48lexr @aalinaaaaaa @thecomfywriter @an-indecisive-nerd

@seastarblue @rae-butter

For Worldbuilding: @paeliae-occasionally @pluppsauthor @thelovelymachinery

For the Existentials: N/A

For the Avatars: @thelovelymachinery

For Sun and Shadow: @mysticstarlightduck @paeliae-occasionally

For the Arcane Rifts: @paeliae-occasionally

For Rising From the Ashes: N/A

For the Storm Avatars: N/A

For the Order Avatars: @thelovelymachinery

For the Magic Avatars: N/A

For the Fire Avatars: N/A

For the Water Avatars: N/A

To be tagged in tag games: @honeybewrites @aalinaaaaaa

Ask and ye shall be added

Divider by @cafekitsune

[lesnahod]

After having watched the first season of 1670:

From now on I am going to react to the slightest inconvenience with "Potwarz!", with various degrees of indignation at once.

I am being subconsciously compelled to marry a son of a magnate.

I have already requested prosperity for Poland several times.

I had been wondering in which piece of Polish cinematography I had heard the phrase "O rety!" previously, and then I realized that I had come across a couple of episodes of Adventure Time with the Polish dub on YT, so here we are. (/sings Oh, szarlotka, czy mi będzie słodko? Czy mnie Finn pokocha? Powiedz.)

The music is so good.

Yes, lure me in with wacky shenaningans only to make me audibly gasp at the quietly emotional sapphic scene. (With less quiet sapphic scenes to follow.)

This series is the best antidote to the autumn moodiness.

[hollyoongs]

hiiiiii love your works. could you please do 16 and 57 with jungwon? Thank uuuuu pookie

𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗠𝗣𝗧𝗦 𝗥𝗘𝗤𝗨𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗗!

"What a nice, submissive little slut you are" + "The camera makes you look even more wet."

Your hands were busy, your left fingers were abusing your swollen clit, and your free hand was burrying deep inside your cunt the pink dildo, everything while your boyfriend Jungwon was recording through his videocamera, his dick red and standing tall to the almost pornographic view you were giving him from free.

When Jungwon asked for help for his cinematography class, you didn't hesitate, but you never thought that after finishing his homework, he would use it and you for other purposes.

"Faster, darling, I want another squirt from you. Can you do that?"

"Yes! I can do that for you, love." Just like he said, your fingers started a faster pace, the dildo you were pushing matching the speed, your moans couldn't even be shut, the pleasure you were feeling was almost too much. He smiled, his hand wrapping his dick, leaving a gasp of pure pleasure as he watched your body shake due to the intense pleasure.

"What a nice, submissive little slut you are, fuck." He adjusted the lens of the camera, zooming to your soaked entrance; he captured the exact moment you squirted all over the dildo, deeply wishing it was him. He could feel himself reaching his high, confining it later as he let all his cum on the floor. "Fuck, you should see this video. The camera makes you look even more wet."

You could catch your breath, seeing how Jungwon seetle his face between your legs after pressing the record button again. You closed your head around his head when he blew a little, directly to your throbbing core.

"Jungwon, what are we doing now?"

"We'll film the next scene."

↷ 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚢'𝚜 note: Cinematography Jungwon!?!?! Give me five plsplspls 🦋

[television-overload]

Finally got to watch NCIS: Origins and I am loving it!! The last line of the episode.... I literally gasped. Even though I was already hooked, now I'm locked in.

Franks is perfect. The actor has these tiny little mannerisms that embody him so well and really add to the believability of it. Randy seems awesome. Love Austin Stowell as Gibbs. Perfect stoic traumatized guy just trying to get by. Oh, and the failed psych eval, with Franks sticking his neck out for him? Love seeing the seeds of the dynamic they later have. It all makes a lot of sense. Their headquarters is also awesome. I love the set design and cinematography so far. Also the soundtrack. Breaking out of the typical procedural style is so exciting. I feel like I hallucinated this show, and I can't wait to see how they do it with the Tiva show.

Also there's some great dialogue, especially from Franks. And a little hint of the Gibbs gut. And I don't even know where to begin with getting more flashbacks of his family. The ones at the end that flashed between his family and old Gibbs were so cool. More of that will break my heart. I had not expected to see Mark Harmon, but it was so nice to see him at the beginning, living it up in Alaska. I wonder if he's telling this whole story for someone specific, and it will be revealed who at the end of the season. I'm also really intrigued to see more of Franks' character.

Last thought: If they go on multiple seasons, I really really really want to see Jenny Shepard. But now that I see this is centered around Lala I'm thinking that's unlikely. Either way, I'm way more hype for this than I ever thought I'd be. I definitely thought at first when they announced it that it was kind of an unnecessary series, but it's so well done and allows them to be really creative with their style. Great showrunners too, I recognize those names. And the riff on the NCIS theme song at the end 🙏🙌

[schrodingerspsycho]

Meet Cut(e) - Chapter 2

Pairing - Tara Carpenter x Reader

Warnings - None

Word Count - 2.9k

Summary - You and Tara take some time to get to know each other better.

Author's Note - Happy Birthday Jenna Ortega!!!🥳

Chapter 1

Help Palestine by clicking this link!🇵🇸

“So I take it you didn’t enjoy the movie?” you said as you and Tara walked out of class on Monday.

“God, no,” she replied, making a disgusted face. You laughed. “Why, couldn’t you tell?”

“I had a hunch when you only added to the discussion two minutes before class ended. And you just reiterated what I had just said.”

“Yeah, because that was the first time you didn’t talk for five minutes straight!” she exclaimed, nudging you. You grinned. “Seriously, you talked more than Professor Johnson did. And your eyes were sparkling the whole time like it was the most interesting topic in the world!”

“Sparkling, huh?” you smirked, raising an eyebrow at her. She just shoved you again.

“Yes! I don’t understand it! How can you get so much joy out of such a boring movie?”

You shrugged your shoulders dramatically. “Well…”

“No,” she commanded, pointing a scolding finger in your face. “I cannot stand hearing you talk about that movie anymore. Or any old movie for that matter. I forbid it.”

“Okay, fine, we’ll talk about something else,” you chuckled. “Why don’t you go on and on about something then?”

“Like what?”

“Those elevated horror movies you were texting me about all weekend,” you suggested. Tara’s eyes lit up.

“I wasn’t annoying you with all those texts, was I?”

“No, of course not.” You shook your head, trying to get rid of the blush you felt creeping up your neck as you thought of how you’d waited with bated breath for her next message. You’d nearly screamed with excitement when she’d sent I’m so proud of you! after you’d told her you’d seen all of Jordan Peele’s films. “I like hearing you talk about horror movies.”

Tara beamed, and you couldn’t help but smile at her. “Okay, which movie did you end up watching?”

“I watched two, actually. The Witch and Midsommar.”

“And what did you think?”

“They were great! Especially Midsommar. The cinematography and special effects really enhanced the growing sense of dread throughout the movie.”

“Oh my god, I know! Ari Aster is, like, one of my favorite directors ever, his work is so innovative” she babbled. “What about The Witch?”

“I loved how they used the Puritan setting to convey the theme, but if I’m honest, I thought it dragged a bit in the middle.”

Tara stared at you in disbelief. “Oh, I know you didn’t just call one of my favorite movies boring.”

“I didn’t say that!” you insisted, throwing up your hands in surrender. Then you grinned mischievously. “I just think it’s a little surprising you didn’t like Metropolis.”

She stopped walking and crossed her arms childishly. “I don’t even want to talk to you,” she scoffed, turning up her nose. “That’s the most insulting thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

“Oh, c’mon,” you said, rolling your eyes. “That can’t be true.”

Tara gasped.

“I’m kidding! I’m kidding,” you chuckled. She glared at you, and you smiled at her softly. “Tell me about The Witch.”

She pretended to be angry for another moment before dropping her arms back to her sides. “Fine,” she huffed, trying to hide her grin. “But you’re still an asshole.”

“It takes one to know one, Coffee Girl. Remember, you insulted one of my favorite movies first.”

Tara ignored you and launched into her spiel about why The Witch was so brilliant. She explained the origins of the folklore and the texts that Robert Eggers referenced when writing it, and she had a lot of thoughts about Thomasin’s strained relationships with her family members. You couldn’t imagine your eyes had ever sparkled half as much as hers did now. She made you want to watch the boring movie again if only to keep that beautiful smile on her face.

“If that’s what I sounded like in class, then I’m sorry,” you joked when you reached the crosswalk. She slapped your arm, her nose scrunching adorably as she snickered. “I wish I could hear more of your riveting analysis, but this looks like the end of the road.”

“Actually, I was going to go to the campus cafe and get some coffee,” she said, dipping her head and glancing up at you hopefully. Her cheeks flushed. “Do you want to come with me?”

“Yeah, that sounds great,” you grinned. “I’ve been looking for an excuse to get some caffeine in me.”

“Okay, let’s go.” She turned toward the cafe and you followed eagerly. “So as I was saying, I find Thomasin’s relationship with her mother to be the most compelling dynamic in the movie,” she continued without missing a beat. You just nodded.

You arrived at the cafe and ordered your drinks, smiling awkwardly at each other as you sat at a small table by the window. You took a sip and your eyes widened in surprise. “Damn, this is good!”

Tara giggled. “Have you not been here before?”

“No, I’ve been meaning to check it out, but I haven’t got around to it. So, thanks.”

“Anytime.”

“Now, I know why you love The Witch, but I don’t know much about you,” you said after a moment. “What are you into besides elevated horror? What’s something I need to know about Tara Carpenter?”

Something flashed in Tara’s eyes, but it disappeared before you could identify it. She shifted uncomfortably, gripping her coffee cup, and you noticed the scar on the back of her left hand. “Oh, I… I’ve been talking for a while. Why don’t you tell me something about you? Tell me about your tattoos!”

She gestured to your arms as she took a big gulp of her coffee, and you smiled sheepishly. “Well, this one is a reference to my favorite TV show,” you said, leaning forward and pointing to the design on your right bicep. Then you pointed to the tattoo opposite it on your left arm. “That one is a reference to my favorite band. And this one’s a reference to my favorite book.” You held out your right arm to show off the intricate design on your wrist. “They’re all things that mean a lot to me. In one way or another, they’ve kind of changed my life,” you explained. Tara smiled. Then you pointed to the bats on your left forearm. “And this one’s just because I think bats are really cool.”

Tara chuckled. “They’re really pretty.”

“Thanks.”

“How long have you had them?”

“Well, I got this one back home in Kansas on my eighteenth birthday,” you said, pointing to the one on your wrist. “And I got the other ones here over the summer.”

“I wonder if you bumped into my friend Chad, he got some here over the summer too,” she said. “I figured most other out-of-state students moved in at the start of the school year.”

“Yeah, well… I guess I just needed a change of scenery,” you replied, rubbing the back of your neck.

“I get that. It’s why we moved during the summer, too.”

“We?”

“My friends go to Blackmore too, so we moved at the same time. And my older sister kind of followed me here.”

“You must be close if you let her do that,” you commented.

Tara stared into her coffee with a small smile. “Yeah, I guess we are.”

“So, is there anything else you want to know about me?” you asked her. She thought for a moment.

“What kind of stuff do you write?”

“Oh, I hope you’re ready for me to ramble at you again,” you grinned. “I’ve written some sci-fi and fantasy stories and a couple of short films, but right now I’m working on a horror story.”

“Ooh, tell me about it!” Tara said, leaning forward excitedly. You did the same, and as you began to describe your passion project, her eyes sparkled almost as much as yours did.

You couldn’t help grinning all the way home. Tara had loved the idea of your horror story, and after making her beg you to let her read it, she had loved the first few scenes even more. Then when you had refused to tell her how it ended, she had thrown napkins at you until a server came over and told her to stop. Her brazen insistence that the server was in the wrong made you forget all about being embarrassed, and you talked for another hour after that. The conversation spanned a wide range of topics, and even though she hadn’t told you much about her past, you felt like you knew Tara pretty well now. Every moment you spent with her made you like her even more, which was why you decided to be bold the next time you saw her.

“Ugh, how many stupid silent films are we going to watch?!” Tara exclaimed as she slung her backpack over one arm, her eyes daring you to challenge her. You chuckled.

“For once, I agree with you. Even I think The Passion of Joan of Arc is boring,” you smiled.

“Finally! God, I was wondering when you would start making sense.”

“But Professor Johnson’s not wrong though. It has some great close-up shots and really interesting set designs,” you continued. Tara groaned.

“Why can’t you just hate the same things as me?”

“Because I have better taste than you,” you said, your smirk growing wider as she pouted back. “If you’re free this weekend, you should come over to my apartment and we can watch it together. It might make it a little more bearable.”

Her expression darkened, and she drifted to the edge of the sidewalk. Away from you. “Sorry, but I can’t- I’m busy this weekend. I can’t… go to your place.”

She avoided your eyes, and you felt a cold dread seep into your chest. Was that too forward? You thought you were friends by now. But of course, you had to go and ruin it. You stumbled over your words, rushing to apologize before she could tell you she never wanted to speak to you again.

“Oh, yeah, no, of course! It’s totally fine, I get it. I’m sorry, I- I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just thought- never mind. I’m sorry.” Your entire face felt hot, and you could’ve sworn she could hear your heart pounding in your chest. She looked at you, her expression probing, and you felt small under her gaze. Then she smiled shyly.

“How about after class on Friday,” she suggested. “If you reserve one of the study rooms in the library, I’m there.”

“Sounds good,” you grinned, heaving a sigh of relief. “Yeah, you got it. I can’t wait.”

“Me neither,” she said. She nudged you playfully. “I never realized how awkward you are.”

“I’m just a treasure trove of new information, aren’t I?”

Tara giggled. “Yeah, and you’re going to use all that information to help me pass this class.”

“Ah, that’s the real reason you hang out with me. You’re using me for my intelligence.”

“Oh, for sure,” she grinned. “No other reason.”

“Understood,” you said, nodding as you approached the crosswalk. “It’s good to know where I stand.”

“Alright, I’ll see you in class, Y/N,” Tara smiled. “And I’m going to hold you to what you said about making Joan of Arc less boring.”

“I’ll do my best,” you promised. “See you later, Tara.”

You fiddled with the drawstring on your hoodie as you walked to the library on Friday. Tara followed as you led her to the study room you’d reserved, the large oak tree outside the window blocking the sunlight and making it feel like a little movie theater. You had spent an hour scouting all the rooms to make sure you got the best one. Not that you would ever tell her that.

“Have a seat,” you said, gesturing to the plush chairs spread out in crude rows across the room as you pulled down the projection screen. You’d also made sure you had the room with the best furniture. “I just need to connect my laptop, and then we can start the movie.”

“How long is it again?”

“About two hours.”

Tara threw her head back against the chair, her eyes screwed shut in a pained expression. “Your job today is to convince me not to drop this class.”

“What, is getting to hang out with me not enough for you?” you smirked. She rolled her eyes. “Aren’t you the one who chose to be a film major?”

“Yeah, but I want to learn how to make movies now, not watch films from a hundred years ago!”

It was your turn to roll your eyes. “Okay, I’ll do my best to convince you. Do you remember what we’re supposed to be paying attention to?”

“Yes,” Tara replied. “But I think you should say it anyway. So I’ll know if you remember or not.”

You smiled in spite of yourself. “The use of close-ups and the things that are off-kilter in the mise en scène.”

“Yeah, good job! You got it right,” she grinned.

“You’re a piece of work, you know that?” you said as you started the movie.

“Yeah, but you like me anyway.”

You didn’t respond as you settled into the chair next to her, feeling self-conscious under her mischievous gaze. “Watch the movie,” you said softly, and you heard her chuckle.

You did watch the movie, at least for a while. Then, as you neared the forty-five-minute mark, Tara’s fidgeting became unbearable. You raised an eyebrow at her as she crossed and uncrossed her legs for the hundredth time, an affectionate smile painting your face. “Do you want to watch it at double speed?”

“Oh, thank god. Yes, please,” she said, heaving a sigh of relief. “Seriously, I don’t know how you can watch this. It’s torture.”

“I never said I liked every silent film,” you replied, getting up to speed up the movie. As you sat back down, you noticed that Tara was shivering. You took off your hoodie and handed it to her with a smile.

“Are you sure?” she asked, glancing from you to the hoodie and back again.

“Yeah, take it. The library is always freezing, and I run hot anyway.”

“Thanks.” She took the hoodie from you, and you realized she had a scar on the palm of her left hand. You couldn’t quite tell, but it looked like it was almost parallel to the one on the back of her hand. But before you could decide if it would be too insensitive to ask about, you saw her poking curiously at the snake embroidered on your favorite hoodie. She looked more adorable than you could’ve imagined, and you weren’t sure how you’d ever tear your eyes away.

Luckily, your hoodie seemed to have placated Tara, and she sat still for the rest of the film. Whether she actually paid attention remained to be seen, but as long as she wasn’t complaining you considered it a win.

“Thank god,” Tara professed when it finally ended. “That was the most boring movie I’ve ever seen.”

You smiled at her. “Now we just need to finish the assignment, and then we never have to talk about it again.”

“I hate you.”

“Uh-huh.” You nodded, opening a new Word document. “What did you notice?”

“Professor Johnson was right. There were a lot of close-up shots.”

“Yes, but what purpose did they serve?”

“I don’t know, making me uncomfortable? Why can’t you just give me the answers, I thought that was the whole point of watching it together.”

You shook your head. “I said I’d help you, not do it for you. The point is for us to collaborate.”

“My fist will collaborate with your face,” she grumbled.

“What?”

“Nothing!” she said, smiling up at you innocently.

“Why did they make you uncomfortable?” you prompted, choosing to ignore her.

“The angles were weird and the shots were so long. It felt like I was stuck in her head- oh.”

“There you go!” you cheered. “Now do you get why we had to watch this movie?”

“It’s still a terrible movie,” she insisted, but she couldn’t keep the shy smile off her face. “But maybe that was a really cool effect. And maybe I kinda, sorta, almost, just a little bit liked it a lot.”

You beamed. “I’m so proud of you!”

“Shut up,” she mumbled, blushing.

It didn’t take you too long to finish the assignment. And if you let her write down some of your thoughts, well, nobody needed to know. She put away her laptop and stood up, preparing to leave.

“Wait,” you said, holding up a hand to stop her. “Do you have anywhere to be right now?”

“No, why?”

“Well, if you want, the room is still reserved for a couple more hours. I figured we could watch a horror movie or something, to cleanse our palates.”

“Yeah, that sounds great!” she smiled. “Good job, Burgers. Maybe this is why I keep this class.”

“Happy to be of service,” you joked. “I’m glad you don’t have plans. I mean, I still would’ve enjoyed watching a movie without my roommate barging in and interrupting, but I’d rather watch something with you.”

“So, what do you want to watch?”

“You’re the horror movie expert, right? You choose.”

She tapped her finger against her chin. “Hereditary. It’s Ari Aster’s first film, I think you’ll love it.”

“Aye aye, captain,” you smirked, saluting her. You started the movie and sat back in your chair, and Tara laid her head on your shoulder.

You knew anything would seem exciting after watching The Passion of Joan of Arc, so you happily settled in for another slow-burn elevated horror movie. And it lived up to your expectations for a while. But then you felt Tara tense, hiding her eyes in the crook of your neck, and then-

“Holy fucking shit!”

It quickly became your favorite scary movie.

[larrylimericks]

23Mar23

We’re feeling some internal friction At silver screen Louis’ depiction; All the world is a stage But it’s hard to engage When plot lines combine fact and fiction.

I get really rambly below the fold. Proceed with caution if you’re over the discourse already.

I debated seeing All of Those Voices in theaters. I didn’t see either of Harry’s films in theaters — Harries are too much of a wildcard, and I refused to sit through hours of squeals and gasps and reactions, not to the movie but to “omg! Harry’s going down on someone! omg, Harry’s bum!” So I was already tentative about seeing Louis’ film in a shared space, outside the protective silos of tumblr. But I bought a ticket, because I want to support him and because I was genuinely curious what story would be told. Then we got the trailer and I hesitated again, not wanting to watch a propaganda film. But, I’ve lived through all the other Bullshit moments, so I figured I could live through Bullshit on the big screen.

My theater crowd was great — pretty neutral aside from an amusing row of politely excitable Larries I was in secret solidarity with. And I pretty much loved the film. Well, 92% of it. I look forward to watching it again when it streams. I mean, it was an hour and a half of content featuring this fascinating creature we’re all obsessed with. I didn’t want to blink. I hung on his every word (when I could understand them). How cool to get, essentially, a long-form interview, where he’s not promoting an album and we’re not getting the same sound bytes. Louis is wonderfully open and vulnerable, and the story of his life (heh) is inherently compelling. The cinematography is beautiful. The behind-the-scenes are delightful and delicious. I can’t wait for the AOTV gif sets once we have it in high-def.

But it has some plot holes as wide and deep as the ones in Don’t Worry Darling.

First, there’s the confusing (to the uninformed) absence of a love interest. Louis is asexual, as far as the film goes. There’s not even a ghost of Eleanor, with whom he’s cumulatively spent a decade and who is supposed to have inspired so many great love songs and with whom he is supposed to have survived a pandemic. Props to E for living her best life now: going to see Scream on AOTV opening day, enjoying full custody of the pups, publicly supporting her assumed partner — sorry you got Kiki Layned from the film, but I’m guessing you weren’t even written into the script. (It’s not like the film was conveniently re-edited in the months since their break-up. Her stunt tapering was intentional.)

Then there’s the glaring absence of a baby mama (thank god; that family would have been even more insufferable). We’re cruising along for 45 minutes or so and then, wham, Dad!Louis enters the chat with a fully formed 6-year-old child. The kid just magically appears with no backstory — just like in real life ... twice (the first time with the pregnancy announcement and the second time with the revival of Dad!Louis after several years of dormancy, right in time for documentary filming. Just like Harry stunted with his co-star during filming and production, Louis stunted with his.)

The kid is cute, and faultless in this. The scenes are objectively sweet (as they were designed to be). But Louis, who normally keeps things very close to the vest, is all of a sudden an emotional spigot you can’t turn off when it comes to these scenes. It seems quite out of character. Which brings back to mind that this Louis *is* a character. The Freddie scenes just didn’t seem to have a point in the plot other than: Louis is a dad. And that role isn’t integral to the film’s story.

He’s incredibly emotional with Freddie, but the movie doesn’t tell us why. The storytelling gets lazy here. The lad/dad plot seems wedged in. The movie would be perfectly complete without it. I felt like it could have been integrated a few different ways: Louis experienced tragedy after tragedy after tragedy — loses 1D, loses his mum, loses his sister ... and then impending fatherhood either becomes another trial he must reluctantly face (in the surprise pregnancy narrative) or it helps him navigate the grief of losing his sole parent, his closest confidante. OR, Louis, not wanting to be like the absentee father he had, shows up for his own oopsie baby despite the unexpected circumstances. But there’s no exposition or rising action. No footage or photos from the first few years of the kid’s life that we haven’t already seen. Just an immaculate conception.

I think the most compelling narratives of the film are these:

Louis’ overcoming adversity after adversity after adversity. Holy hell. I lived through 1D ending, through the devastating news about Jay (god, I remember the shock and sadness of that day — it was incomprehensible), through the heartbreaking news about Fizzy, and then when you think Louis is gonna get his moment of victory with his first solo world tour, coronavirus pulls the rug out. (That sequence was well done: where we keep seeing the dates get closer and closer to March 2020, and we all know the villain that’s coming, but it’s still such a blow.) I lived through all that in real time, but seeing it in such a concentrated sequence really highlights the shit he’s been dealt, and hearing him open up about so much of it ... that’s the character development relevant to the film’s denouement. And getting to see Louis get what he deserves, finally, and hearing him acknowledge that he deserves it, was a lovely ending.

Louis’ journey to find his footing and his confidence as a solo artist after unfathomable success as part of a group. But, in a sort of plot twist, he’s not really solo, is he? The film gives a lovely introduction to his band now — and in their own words, reveals that they’re not just a backing band, they’re a *band* band. Louis has let them in. He’s forged a new brotherhood. *That*, for me, was the heartwarming story. I loved those scenes, loved seeing Louis in his element, which is in a collective, where he is both king and jester at the same time. (Or perhaps Oli’s the jester. Thank fuck for him, man. Oli is the standout. The breakthrough performance. The comic relief. I want a spinoff series.) It’s easy to miss 1D and glorify those short years and think nothing will ever top it, but Charlie’s storytelling of the LT Band is remarkable. We’re left looking forward, not back.

I know Louis’ dedication to his fans and his fans’ dedication to him is a huge focus, but I don’t really enjoy watching commentaries on fandoms I’m a part of. I’m living it. I don’t need outsider context. And in a fandom as fractured as Louis’ (and 1D’s) there’s not a universal experience. The film depicts dedication as sleeping on streets for rail, hopping from country to country and draining bank accounts — because that’s the kind of “superfandom” that gets easily turned into a marketable freak show. Show me the documentary on the fans who organize the light projects, who run the fashion accounts, who curate livestream sources on show nights, who have turned giffing into an art and science, who help promote Louis in the absence of a competent marketing team, etc., etc. I also thought the interview with the American(?) girls talking about LATAM shows was shortsighted. And showing the rainbow factions but not addressing them? What a missed opportunity to talk about songs like Only the Brave becoming a queer anthem. Straight artists can have gay fans, you know.

But the film doesn’t make the kid relevant to any of those storylines. He could have been worked into the first, but wasn’t. It was like a standalone narrative, with footage from a narrow set of days. I was at both those L.A. shows. The energy was so different from night 1 to 2. And in retrospect it’s clear Louis was performing the first night so Charlie could get the right shots. More like a choreographed play than a rock concert. It makes sense now why the Clarks weren’t in the VIP box with Freddie — couldn’t have them cluttering the frame or distracting the actors. Just, everything about the Freddie scenes is heavy-handed. Make a sign for your dad! Draw his logo in the sand! Fly a kite at sunset! He’s the spitting image of Louis! (Len does all the heavy lifting.) And all the maneuvering it had to take to get all those shots from the L.A. show?! In the VIP box from behind (and from the front, and when he just happens to be mouthing along to Two Of Us), side stage watching Louis end the show, on-stage watching Louis approach Freddie after the show, on-stage catching the moment Louis gives the lad a shout-out ... Charlie had a shot list. But sure, nothing was set up, it was totally organic.

I’m still unsettled by how heavily Charlie laid it on at the first premiere press conference — *he* was the one to bring up the kid, and was weirdly emphatic that nothing was staged, nothing was forced. It had the same energy of the “It’s. Not. Real” thrown baby doll moment, only it’s Charlie insisting that It. Is. Real. Thou dost protest too much, me thinks.

And of course, the lack of interaction between Louis and Harry remains, as ever, the biggest tell. We get poignant post-1D Nouis and Lilo moments in the film, but no Larry. We’re spoon-fed these Very Emotional Moments between father and son (“love you,” “Darling,” mouth kisses), when the real story, the real emotion, the real connection is in just a few seconds of furtive glances between Harry and Louis in the backstage footage of the last 1D performance. Christ, the way Harry’s eyes bore into Louis — chin tilted down, eyes glancing up from beneath a furrowed brow, lips tight, disguising his attentiveness with a hair flip ... they mastered so many forms of silent communication. The quiet call and response, the depths of love and care and concern and protection contained in micro-expressions. Fuck, give me 90 minutes of that. Just a silent film of Louis and Harry looking at each other.

Anyway. Sorry this sounds so grumpy. I did really love most of the movie. But I haven’t made sense of why this film was made. I don’t know its purpose. Maybe the introspection forced by the pandemic lockdown is to credit for this glut of music docs (“docs”) lately. Maybe nine minutes frees him up for nine more months or nine more years. I dunno. He obviously wanted this story told in this way.

Seeing a movie requires the willing suspension of disbelief. You have to ignore critical thinking in order to enjoy the story you’re being told. You tune out your knowledge that everything is fake for the sake of being entertained. We know that Superman can’t actually fly, but we still buy tickets to the cinema. But, a documentary shouldn’t require us to employ this semi-conscious perceiving mode. Yet here we are. I’m just not sure how much more or how much longer we can suspend our disbelief to enjoy fandom.

[dangermousie]

Best kdrama you have probably never heard of - Someday (2006)

"I can't breathe because my heart is filled with thoughts of you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you."

Answering the ask about my perfect kdramas made me think of and want to make a pusher post for the most underrated drama on that list Someday, starring Bae Doona, Lee Jin Wook, Kim Min Joon and Oh Yoon Ah.

When she was 17, Hana (Bae Doona), a Korean brought up in Japan by her grandmother, won a prestigious award and was launched on a career as a popular manga artist in Japan. The same day Hana was launched on her path to popularity and fame, Seokman (Lee Jin Wook) was having the worst day of his life -- he and his family were involved in a car crash, leaving him the only survivor. Fast forward three years or so and the paths of Hana, now a well-known mangaka who is facing a creative drought, and Seokman, now a sort of a missing-persons detective, are about to collide.

This is both an old drama (2006) and also one released on OCN back when it was just starting, so even back when I originally watched it 15 years ago, it was not well known. It's such a pity - this one is on my Top 10 kdramas list of all time for a reason. There are so many reasons as to why this deserves to be better known - it has a delicious off-beat vibe and in some ways it reminds me on an old school jdrama with its realistic feel and its meditation on life; but it retains old school kdrama strengths of romance and suffering and gorgeous cinematography. Its love story, which made me cry and cry and then grin like a lunatic and hug my pillows - it's so unexpected and sneaks up on you and then grabs and refuses to let go. Its stories of alienation and connections and families lost and found and made. Its laid-back charm which lures you in until you, all relaxed, are whacked with the darkness at the core, and are left gasping for breath (full disclosure - this drama made me cry more than once.)

It is also a chance for you to see some wonderful performances. The always sublime Bae Doona is well...sublime, as the quirky Hana who has locked her capacity for warmth and caring far away due to childhood loss - when the story starts she is almost an alien dropped among those weird humans - curious, exploratory, and oh-so-different. One of the biggest pleasures of the drama is to watch her learn to become fully human - to feel compassion, to feel love. Lee Jin Wook is one of my huge kdrama crushes and he doesn't disappoint, playing his character with so much sweetness that you get lulled into a false sense of security and don't realize just how much damage and despair Seokman has inside, until you are confronted with it, and then go "of course - it all makes sense now." His chemistry with Bae Doona is just so pitch-perfect - their whole relationship is so full of discovery and hope and tentativeness for both of them. You can't help but root for these two very damaged people to work it out and heal each other. She has no emotions but he has no hope or self-worth - and the biggest pleasure for me was to watch both of them recover what they lack. The drama Someday reminds me of most is my favorite twdrama, Mars - the two horribly damaged protagonists with vastly different coping mechanisms make each other better. It goes dark sometimes, terribly dark, but ultimately it's the story of new beginnings and of hope.

Kim Min Joon and Oh Yoon Ah are not secondary characters in this - every member of the quartet (and they are not really a love quartet in the usual sense) is equally important. If Hana and Seokman are horribly wounded children, both KMJ and OYA play grown-ups. If you are expecting a typical older kdrama evil secondary girl, you are in for a disappointment. OYA's Hae Young is the sanest, best person in the quartet, and the one most in touch with her feelings, which include her unrequited love for her best friend Jin Pyo (KMJ). And speaking of Kim Min Joon - he plays perhaps the most controversial character in this - a psychiatrist who gloms onto Hana as a representation of his fanboy fantasies, not a real woman (he does not get to know the real Hana the way Seokman does) and who is the one most in control and delights in manipulation. But I ended up liking him nonetheless - in a way, he was caught in a bubble as much as Hana was, only this bubble was of his own willful making.

My favorite scene? Because I am a sadist, it's the sequence leading to Seokman's suicide attempt (it's either that or he gets done in, due to the debts) - his counting how many minutes he has left and getting his math wrong, his visiting the hospital and tying up all the loose ends, his scene on the river bank with Hana, his suicide attempt itself, when he walks off limping and muttering "stupid stupid stupid" not able to think of anything but that he failed.

This drama is SO GOOD and SO UNDERRATED and really should be watched.

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

Moving from Last Twilight to Pit Babe, I'm sure there will be no whiplash here at all.

Me: Gah, Way, I am still so mad at you.

Also me: So Pete, we are railing this man when?

Jeff's internal monologue: "Don't be suspicious, don't be suspicious..."

When the show starts to catch up to the fanfic writers:

So it's not hard to guess who Reval is, but I am very curious about how Charlie connected with him, because he was so critical for the entire plan.

Nothing brings you back from almost death like soy milk!

Question on the sense thing though - how has Charlie not take Jeff's sense? Or does he need to be in frequent skin to skin contact for that?

Ah, it's Jeff who's the center of all things!

Also, for the love of Pete (lol), translators, please stop calling him Daddy.

Aww, Alan was worried for his baby. As he should be, since the dude has a) been kidnapped, and b) been working on a very dangerous secret plan.

Oh? And just what were they doing while they were being loud...

I'll see myself out.

But also Jeff being worried about being the best for Alan... oh, my heart.

Omg, I so love Kim being a part of this crew! Dude is so adaptable. "This is my family now, sure, why not".

*gasp* Are things finally...happening?

AHHHH, THE CUTENESS

Love Alan showing why us experienced older folks can really rock the flirting sometimes.

Lol. Alan is on the horny train now and he does not wanna get off.

Not to detract from the hotness, but I really like the cinematography of this scene.

Not the bracelets clicking together, ahhh.

I'll be over here on the floor.

Kenta, you are running out of time to stop being a total ass. I'm sorry for what you've been through, but it's time to take some control of your own life, dude.

Interesting... we certainly were not imagining that tension before!

THAT'S WHERE YOU END IT!?!?

Um, excuse me... you filmed more JeffAlan and didn't show it to us! Rude!

[markiemelon]

hi!!! I wanna request a fic with either mark, haechan or renjun hehehe with them and the reader reenacting latter's favorite film scenes jshsjsbsj. I will really appreciate it! I REALLY LOOOOOVE YOUR WRITINGS! YOU ROCK! <333

favorite movie

{it turned out a little differently than the initial request…but i think you’ll like it}

—————————

pairings haechan x fem implied!reader

bffs2lovers

—————————

you and your childhood best friend!haechan have been inseparable since preschool, no matter how much you wanted to be separated from him. You hoped that by the time you reached college you would have escaped him, but he followed you there too.

you were taking a cinematography class, and of course, he was there as well. you had just been assigned a project where a group would choose a movie scene to reenact and film. of course, you and haechan were partners. the two of you got to work at his place.

“ynnnnnn” a high-pitched whine shook you awake. “yn you can sleep later. we have to choose a scene.”

you lifted your head off of the cold kitchen table.

“hyuck you watch tons of dramas…let’s just do your favorite movie or something…”

suddenly, a light when off in haechan’s eyes. “perfect.”

he flashed a devious smile and you didn’t dare to ask what he was thinking.

he pulled his laptop from his bag and pulled up a video. “let’s do this one.”

on his laptop was a clip, where the male lead was leaning against the wall with his his arm up above the female lead’s head.

you weren’t surprised at what haechan had suggested; he’s always been a flirt.

you playfully nudged his shoulder. “donghyuck be for real.”

“pleaaaaaaasssseeeeeee can we please do this one?” he stomped his feet underneath the table. “it’ll be funny. plus, the professor said whoever chooses romance films gets extra credit.”

and for some reason… you believed him.

“seriously?”

“mhmm” he smiled.

“i hate you.” you grabbed the camera from the table and set it up on the tripod. “im only doing this for the sake of my grade.”

“this is a good spot over here.” haechan led you over to a wall in his living room.

you watched the video a few times to take notes of how the scene played out. “so you’re supposed to pin me to the wall, and then you say “look at me”, umm then i look at you.” you paused the video, and pressed record on the camera. “okay. take 1.”

haechan approached you confidently, a little too comfortable. he reached his hand up to the side of your face, and leaned forward, inching closer towards you. “look at me.” he said. you couldn’t look at him. not when you could feel your face burning red. you stepped away from haechan’s gaze for a moment. “i forgot my line.” you said, still looking away. “you’re not even supposed to say anything yet.” haechan giggled. “is your heart fluttering already?” he teased you. “let’s just try again.” he pulled your shoulder to turn you around. “oh my gosh.” he covered his mouth to hold his laugh. “yn your face is so red!” he clapped his hands together. “i was just joking about your heart fluttering-”

you pushed him away. “im just a really good actor.”

“wowwww actor yn. can i get your autograph??” he gasped.

you just ignored him. “take 2” you adjusted the camera.

haechan approached you again. “look at me.” he said. this time, you did look at him. he smiled. you were waiting for him to continue with the scene, but he just stared at you. you noticed him getting closer, his head tilting ever so slightly to the side as his face came to yours. you wanted to seem annoyed but you didn’t bother trying; you were so distracted by him. you had never really looked at him so intently before. “haechan.” you whispered, stopping him, but not pushing him away. “you know, there’s no kiss in this scene.”

he had that suspicious smile pasted across his face, like a kid stealing candy. “i know.” he continued where he left off. soon enough, his lips and your lips were glued.

normally when haechan got even remotely close to your face, your reflexes would shove him, but oddly, you didn’t feel like that anymore.

you kissed him. you kissed your best friend and you didn’t mind at all.

“yn.” he broke away from the kiss. “what do you think about me?”

you came to a sudden realization that you did have feelings for your best friend, and you saw no point in lying to him. “i think i like-” you started.

“that’s what i thought.” haechan tilted your head up a little before kissing you again. he pulled your head in to his chest. “i’ve been waiting for this moment since 5th grade.” he hugged you tighter.

you were still a little shocked at what just happened, but you couldn’t help but enjoy the warmth of haechan’s embrace, and what a good feeling it was to be loved by him.

“wait,” you muttered. “is that thing still recording?” you inspected the camera. haechan laughed. “well i guess now i’ve got a new favorite movie.”

you ended up submitting that very video, and to your surprise, you did get extra credit.

the end.

[father-imperator]

everything i wrote watching saltburn (2023)

watching saltburn is so weird when you're an lgbt poor kid with an alcoholic mother who goes to a private school and you're the only person in your academic circles who's there because you spent way too many hours doing tests and things rather than just paying.

oh em gee was that implying that he's hung???

EW EW EW EW EW YUCK. WHY ARE YOU EATING HIS CUM OUT THAT MOLDY FUCKIN BATH ANIME GIRL BATHWATER FR FR???

oh. yuck. she's on her period.

EW YUCK FARLEIGH IS WATCHING

what who was that with the blood and the water

no way they're doing a dress up party

HE DOESN'T KNOW HIS FOOTMEN'S NAMES

oh come on of course felix is an "i'm not racist" rich white boy

why is every single one of them so manipulative shut up felix shut up family shut up venetia

SHE DOESN'T KNOW HOW MANY KIDS SHE HAS

flirting with richard iii is so real

i hate farleigh but i am not annoyed about this development because i hate him significantly less that the rest of his family

oh nevermind! rent by the psb was cold.

yeah yeah yeah punching mirrors

disobedience, threats, violence, and anger (sexual style)

pamela DIED?

no no no he will never understand no one like him will ever understand you do not fucking take a kid like that to his parents house

what is going on is he not poor? is his dad not fucking dead? are his parents not addicts?

this movie is hurting my brain why did he lie? why? that's? what? maybe oliver is not just like me fr fr

farleigh and oliver are so. what. also, sidenote, people on coke are so weird.

WHAT HUH WBWT WHWT WBAT WAHT WBAT WBAT WHAT WBAT WHAT WBAT WHAT WHAT HE'S DEAD NO WHAT

the cinematography and the acting holy shit

farleigh and oliver really going for the throat huh

AHHHHHHHH THE IMAGERY OF LYING ABOVE SOMEONE'S GRAVE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SOBBING AHHHHHHHHHHH

oh my goodness at the party oliver was a deer because he was going to be hunted and felix was an angel because he was going to become one

oh oh ew keep your trousers on dude EW EW EW EW WHY ARE YOU FUCKING HIS GRAVE EW EW EW EW EW EW EW THIS IS NOT HOW WE MOURN NU UH

this is just so many levels of mindfuck what is wrong with every single person

NO WHY ARE YOU KISSING

OH MY FUCKING CHRIST SHE KILLED HERSELF

ew it's like he replaced felix yuck i hate this i hate this so much

i am not liking this

OH JAMES IS DEAD TOO THEY'RE DROPPING LIKE FLIES

oh fucking hell they've all been cleared out and now he gets it

OH NO NO NO WHAT HAPPENED TO HER

oh he's fucking insane

OH MT GOODNESS ACTUALLY OH MT GOODNESS THIS WAS ALL PLANNED OH OH OH I'M GOING TO THROW UP I GENUINELY FEEL SICK THIS IS VILE THIS IS AWFUL THIS IS SO HORRIBLE

ew ew stop back away ew ew ew no no no no no no no stop oh christ he's killed them all oh christ oh i hate this this is just so many levels of horrible

STOP HANGING OUT IN THE ROOM WITH HER BODY

oh shit he spared farleigh by telling sir james about the coke!!!

no stop dancing put ur dick away

okay. i finished. worst movie i've ever seen, it was absolutely brilliant and i will never ever watch it again in my life. i have cried once, gagged eight times, audibly gasped 21 times.

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

Hello. 2023 top 5 BL visually stunning moments. Rose💜

Hello Rose 🤍 Thank you for this one!

There were some really pretty moments in 2023 and giffing them was so much fun. Working with the right coloring to make the scenes pop and to be satisfied with the result was so much fun (and some time a little bit frustrating!).

The following list is not complete, but those are the most visually stunning moments for me, for different reasons.

We start the list with a show I loved to look at but I didn't like to watch it that much after the first episodes:

Chains Of Heart

The cinematography was breathtaking! The coloring was beautiful and I had so much fun making my sets for every week. The story... well that is another story. Chains of heart brought us many beautiful, visually pleasing moments and I remember loving to gif this scene. I enjoy finding moments in series I want to put into a set. And this was one I totally fell in love with.

Next is part of a show I really hope we get some more stunning scenes in the future:

The Sign

Look at this beauty! This is art. This is so fucking beautiful and stunning! My jaw dropped! The coloring, the reds, it is just majestic! It looks so surreal and yet so cool! I am in love with the visuals of this show. There were so many more scenes, but this stood out to me!

And on we go with a series that left us all in pieces at times and also that flashed us with one of the best reunions ever:

The Eighth Sense

The coloring in this scene was so gorgeous (yes, for gifmaking really shitty, because some parts are overcolored and some are a little bit bland)! I was so excited for this reunion. The music, the whole feeling, the waiting, the happiness, just everything was so fucking perfect! And I do love myself a good little kissing scene. And this is one of my most favorite scenes. Visually just one of the most beautiful scenes ever!

And sometimes I am a simple girl and think a fish tank, some goldfish and a smiling Jimmy is stunning and visual perfection.

Last Twilight

This scene was so cute and so beautiful and yes, I might be biased because I am in love with Mhok and every moment of him looking at Day is visually stunning, but this scene... It is so soft and I know I will go back there from time to time. It was a good cinematic choice and I applause the creators for all these visual beautiful choices!

The last one might be just me crushing hard on the beautiful visuals:

Only Friends

I was lying on the floor, gasping for air and drooling after this scene. I needed to pause the series and rewatch it immediately. Visually one of the most stunning moments I saw 2023 on my screen!

Ask me Top 5 BL Anything from 2023