#STR8 BEARD

[avaganda]

[hobbithoes]

finally drew mama and babyy girl <3

[cascadianights]

Absolutely baffling that when I talk about my partner (who is clocked as a cis male by the general public 90% of the time) the second some people realize he's trans they start using they/them?? Despite clear usage of he/him and their grasp of it before?

Then they struggle ENDLESSLY with using they/them for me bc even though I cut off 3/4 of the hair on my head and have more chest & body hair than the cis men I've dated, my hips and chest still clock me as female no matter what

[mellifluousoctopus]

Straight Woman on Tiktok: Lol I love my husband Im such a sissy boykisser 😊

[teethwarden]

you all do forcemasc fucking WRONG. i want to be treated like your pansy ass teenage tboy son that you hate all he wants to do is lie around and dress up pretty and let men your age fuck him in the pussy while calling him tiny and beautiful well guess what. thats not what you sacrificed your whole life for. thats not what you let him on t for. if he thinks you wanted to see your only son - your legacy - be a weak ass bitch he’s got another thing coming. you make him watch football with you, and all he does is whine that he doesn’t understand it. you make him throw a ball around in the front yard and all he does is hide his face in fear and embarrass you in front of the neighbors. all he does is cry and panic and that’s not the man you want to say you raised. so you gag him while you watch football together, turning him by the hair to face the screen. you tie him up against the shed and hurl baseballs at his face until he doesn’t flinch anymore. you fuck him in the ass like a man, and he even begins to enjoy it. you beat him: first with your fists, until he stops crying; then you move to your belt, and then to your whip. you only stop beating him when he hits you back for the first time. and then you fight. you end up with three of your molars knocked out and he ends up with a broken arm that’s hard to explain to the nurse at the hospital front desk. then you get his t dose raised and you start to work out with him . you fuck in the sauna at the gym and he begins to get aggressive. he starts biting you back and holding you down and eating your sweaty hairy ass with the fervor of a man starved. when his beard starts to grow in dark and he doesn’t shave it… when those “str8” men on grindr start avoiding his profile… when he can’t cum without something in his ass…. thats when you suddenly realise you are proud of him

[foreskinniest]

I need a str8 manly man twice my size with a beard to brutally bounce on it narsty style while he meows. Pls sign my petition

[gatorbutch]

trans dyke? you mean str8 dude? nigga u got a fukin beard n callin urself a chick. u r da reason bitches h8 trannys

[straight8men]

[puthyflapps]

I saw another rumor on tt saying Sandra Bullock is in the closet also

As much as I’d love for her to be a carpet muncher, I don’t think she is 😪

[lifeinthegladhouse]

some people: all father loves us, he is so powerful and gay and cunning

other people: he will fuck yr shit up he is so wise but also will just throw anyone and everyone to the sharks

my experience: when i cried and cried and cried there was silence, when i left offerings and divined there was warm and affirming laughter, when i traveled and left offering there was insane inclimate weather, but most of the time i am like ??????????

reddit: hes gonna make u wanna die by the time u get what u asked for, we venerate with deep fear, he only wants warriors to expend and has no time for you

tumblr: all dad is a hot old man

me: WHY IS HE (ALL) OF IT

[tenfifteenthirteen]

also anon i got your message (both parts) and i completely agree with you Except...

no one “agrees” to bearding like patrick wasn’t sat down and told he’d need to get a fake gf to cover up for the fact that he had a bf and he was like yeah sure sounds great i’d love to do that i’d love to now have to lie about literally every aspect of my life just to cover up the fact i'm dating a guy. like i’m not trying to sound rude but i get a lot of messages from people that suggest the boys are going along with this by choice and i just wanna say firstly as a gay person being closeted is Never a choice and to be forcefully closeted/bearded certainly isn’t either. even if you get convinced it’s the “right/best” thing to do it’s still not a choice.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Taylor Swift is a lesbian so the silly article about her lyrics is fine. There's a reason why she's always "dating" those super ugly British guys who need a fame boost. Because let's be honest about it: a giant portion of her fanbase is made up of county music listeners and her career would be INSTANTLY over if she came out. She's smart enough to stay closeted until she's no longer successful. Then she can finally come out and use the attention for another career resurgence. Girlies who want validation and representation from kWeEr artists can stay mad and support irrelevant flops who never make an actual dent in the music industry. There's a massive difference between random TikTok-reliant fads and THE Taylor Swift who's been a commercial juggernaut for nearly 17 years now. So I'd say she's doing great frolicking around as a str8 womynx with her NDA'd beards, racking up millions of dollars in her bank accounts while happily eating hot model (and I mean actually classy models, no plastic abominations and/or "influencers") kitty cat in her mansions.

this is so funny. I'd ask you to marry me so we could drive each other to ruin but your use of the word kweer and otherwise palpable disdain for actual homos makes me your suspect you're a huge cunt. godspeed you poor bastard.

[straight8men]

[pinene]

My taste in men is basically “men women are not into” and this is why I can’t have str8 girl friends bc they will be like “Ewwww look at this guy with a big beard and flannel holding a fish who just swiped right on me” and I’m like babe I would eat him alive wtf are you on about. And then I ask what their type is and it’s like… Timothy chalrmeldmelt