#SHES STILL HERE GUYS UTS STILL LIT

[theinconveniencing]

twas lit

[just-here-for-the-moment]

For the DIFFERENT POV GAME:

I want Javi’s POV on this whole adorable scene.

Okay, my Queen @quica-quica-quica, I want you to know that I suuuuucked in a huge breath when I saw this Ask, because I was entirely unsure if I could do this. It seemed like a really hard challenge, but FOR YOU I’ll try anything.

I dug in to see what I could do, and of course because I can’t just write succinctly I had to start waaaaaay back in the beginning of the story to get Javier where I needed him for the phone number scene… hope that’s okay!!

Thank you for challenging me this way! This went from scary to amazing in just a few days! I love you so much, my friend!!!

---

Coffee Shop Girl (a companion piece to “For Now” told from Javier’s point of view)

Word count: 3000+

Rating: mature, 18+ only

Outline: Javier Peña x “You” (Austin coffee shop barista; cis/het female reader; “blank canvas”/no physical description/no name/no use of “Y/N”)

Warnings: slow-burn; references to previous hiring of sex workers; cigarette smoking; Javier masturbating

Javier Peña felt like he was at loose ends. Not for the first time in his life, but it’s different feeling ‘lost’ as a young man than feeling ‘lost’ when you’re on the wrong side of 40. At least a teenager can still expect their whole life ahead of them. Since leaving the DEA and the fight in Colombia behind, he had been feeling directionless.

Spending some time at his dad’s ranch in Laredo had helped, the way that hard labor and sweat always does. It left him too tired to ruminate, to sink into the blues and feel sorry for himself. He had lined up a teaching job at a university in D.C. but it didn’t start until the fall semester, and Javier wasn’t looking forward to an entire blazing-hot summer on the ranch. So when his friend Bill called from Austin and offered a short contract job doing consulting for one of the state agencies, he jumped at the chance.

Javier landed at Mueller Airport at 2:00 in the afternoon on the second Saturday in June. He made his way out of luggage pickup to the Hertz desk and signed for a rental car. It didn’t take him long to find the apartment complex where Bill had arranged for him to stay. Bill’s coworker’s son had graduated from UT Austin in May, and the lease wasn’t up until August, so everything worked out perfectly. Javi could sublet for the remainder of the summer, and the apartment complex was close enough to the office that he could take the bus, meaning he wouldn’t have to put too many miles on the rental car or pay for parking downtown. A small, blandly furnished one-bedroom apartment near work was perfect. He could make it work for two months, and he had certainly lived in much worse places during his years traveling.

On Monday Javier was introduced around the office and given his portfolio of cases to consult on. He also found out that the coffee in the office was total shit. He had spent too many years drinking government-grade slop at the DEA and other agencies to put up with it now. He wasn’t one to complain, or to order any of the frilly new designer coffee drinks that seemed to be making the rounds among the ladies in the secretarial pool, but he had noticed a coffee shop between here and the bus stop. Some local place, one of those Austin things where they boasted about fair trade and locally roasted beans. If they made a decent cup of black coffee he could splurge, buy a cup on his way into the office each day.

The bus dropped him off at the corner at 7:45, so he could grab a coffee and still be on time to work at 8:00. Punctuality wasn’t always his strong suit, but Javier wanted to at least make a good impression while he was consulting. You never knew who might be a network contact to something good, and he didn’t want to screw Bill over after he had recommended him for the contract.

Tuesday Javier tried the coffee shop and found out that their coffee was not only decent for the price, it was actually good. Wednesday he went back again, this time brushing fingers with the pretty barista by accident. He offered her a “thanks” and then went on his way. Thursday he walked in and stood patiently in line behind two stoner kids trying to make up their minds between breakfast tacos and blueberry muffins. The pretty barista was there again, and she waved him over with a smile, indicating he could skip to the counter and leave the hippie kids in line.

“Black coffee, right?” Her smile actually reached her eyes, and for a moment Javier was very glad for all of the body language and psychology classes he had ever had to sit through. It was nice having a pretty lady smile at you to start your morning, and even better that this one already knew his order. She was quick, he figured, and good at her job if she had his order memorized after only two days as a customer. Not that ‘black coffee, to go’ was a difficult order, but he hadn’t expected to become a regular so quickly.

He smiled and nodded, “That’s right. Thank you.” He looked for a wedding ring and then for a nametag on her black apron, but didn’t see either one. He slid a rumpled $5 bill across the counter, larger than the singles he had paid with the previous two days, but she was nice. “Keep the change.”

He thought he saw her bite her lip as she turned away, and while she was fixing his cup he took a moment to check her out. He wasn’t some kind of pervert who would goose her from over the counter, but from what he could see she was attractive. Hell, most women were attractive to Javier. He suddenly realized it had been a while since he’d gotten laid. His last relationship was years past, and he no longer visited prostitutes regularly. Javier wasn’t a ‘reformed man’ by any means, it was just that that habit had been limited to a specific time and place in his life where he wasn’t stable enough to have a long-term relationship, and it had the added bonus of gathering intelligence.

The barista turned back to him with the cup and when she handed it off their eyes locked and their fingers touched again. He saw her pupils dilate and recognized the little spark that turned over in his own gut. Damn, she really was attractive. But Javier didn’t want to be the kind of lecherous guy who hit on a woman while she was working. Too many men mistook the minimum of customer service friendliness for a sexual invitation. Or worse, like the men who hit on waitresses on purpose since they couldn’t be outright rude to stop them. Javier suppressed a smile and took the cup from her, nodding his thanks.

On Friday when he breezed into the coffee shop he saw the pretty barista smile from behind the counter, and she immediately turned and started pouring his to-go cup. She turned back and gave him the ‘what’s up’ chin nod while holding his cup up. Javier walked up and he slid a few singles across the counter to her.

Javier gave her a warm, “Thanks,” and winked at her. That was at least a harmless bit of flirting, in line with her bright smiles and her friendliness so far. If she liked it, great; and if not, then at least he hadn’t made her uncomfortable by asking for her number or hitting on her directly. When he said, “See you next week,” she smiled that bright smile back. Javier noticed that it again reached her eyes, lighting them up just a bit more than last time. A good sign.

The weekend dragged but Javier filled it up with errands: a run to HEB for groceries and to Highland Mall for a new shirt. If there was the possibility of a date sometime in the next few weeks he at least wanted to wear something other than his work clothes. Saturday night he ordered pizza and watched a movie on TV, some lame action movie with giant muscled guys shooting way too many bullets, and of course all the curse words and a sex scene edited out for network TV. Can’t let the kiddies hear the word ‘shit’ while they’re flipping channels, but watching Stallone blow a guy’s head off is good for their growing brains. He finished his pizza and a cigarette and then felt that tug, the loose ends, a little bored.

Javier took a shower and his mind went to the pretty barista, that smile, the sparkly eyes. He thought about those eyes looking up at him through her lashes, or down at him from on top. He wondered what her skin felt like, imagining the rest of her naked, spread out, touching him all over. He felt a little bit creepy touching himself to the thought of her, hoping it didn’t make him a bad person, hoping he would see her again on Monday. But fuck it, he needed the release. Javier came, spurting hot in the steamy shower as he leaned his head on his forearm and groaned into the cold tile wall. He wished he at least knew her name.

Sunday Javier slept in and then did laundry, tidied up the apartment, and took a jog around the neighborhood. He tried to talk himself out of a repeat of Saturday’s shower. It didn’t work.

On Monday Javier lit up as soon as he stepped off the bus. The first week of the consulting gig had gone well, but today was a big meeting and he knew the agency was not going to like his recommendations. He was constantly trying to quit, but at least he had cut back recently. He was down to a pack a day and only one cup of coffee. That had to count for something, right? Maybe his doctor would finally get off his back about that.

He smoked as rapidly as he could on his way to the coffee shop, and stubbed the cigarette out as soon as he reached the big window that overlooked the street corner. He tucked his sunglasses into the top pocket of his blazer and opened the door to the coffee shop.

The pretty barista was smiling, looking right at him and already holding up his cup of coffee like a game show model holding a prize. Javier felt his heart give a little squeeze, and he smiled and winked at her again as he approached the counter.

“You psychic or something? Or am I just that predictable?”

“Both, maybe.” She wiggled her eyebrows at him and gave him a toothy grin.

Javier opened his wallet and saw that his smallest bill was a $10, but he decided not to ask for change back. She was attentive to her customers, she had surprised him by having coffee ready, and she was cute. “Great service, keep the change.”

Her face lit up and she turned to put the money in the register. Javier turned and exited the front door, and then decided to look back through the big plate glass window. She was looking at him, and Javier realized that meant that she had watched him leave. He hoped he wouldn’t have to tip $10 every time to get that look. He lifted his cup, nodded at her, and then made his way to the office.

Tuesday she had his coffee ready again, so he gave her another wink with his smile, and he thought that she purposely put her fingers in a spot to touch his as she handed the cup over. He paid with a $5 bill again, and then thought about her smile and her touch all the way to the office a few blocks north. He didn’t want her to think that the overtipping was him trying to come on to her; it really was nice to have his order ready to go every day.

On Wednesday she had his coffee ready again as soon as he walked in, but Javier supposed that was a testament to the bus schedule more than his own punctuality. This time he paid with singles. But he didn’t want her to think the smaller tip was because of anything wrong with her customer service, so he smiled a little more warmly, turning the charm up as much as he dared without just outright hitting on her. He noticed she was looking again through the glass as he left. But of course the only reason he knew that was because he had looked, too.

On Thursday Javier decided that it wouldn’t hurt to flirt a little more obviously, but to give her an out in case she wasn’t interested. He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable or fuck up his supply of good coffee, so he decided to take it a little slow. When he got to the corner he glanced into the window of the coffee shop and saw the pretty barista looking right at him. He took that as a good sign that she might be receptive to his flirting. He opened the door and let someone exit, then walked up to the counter. She pointed at his cup sitting on the counter in front of her, smiling that bright smile.

He arched an eyebrow up. “You trying to get rid of me? In and out so quickly?”

She grinned at him. “Depends on how long you were planning to stay. We close at 1:00 a.m. after open mic tonight. After that you gotta go somewhere else.” That was the most that she’d spoken to him yet. Javier decided to take his chance.

“And what time do you get off, after the morning shift?”

“Depends on who’s asking.” She winked and then bit the inside of her lips, like she had said something she shouldn’t have.

Javier decided to be direct. At least that would give her the chance to say ‘no’ if she wasn’t interested. He locked eyes with her and said, “I am.”

He was relieved to see her flash that big smile, all pretty soft lips and sparkly eyes. “I finish at 1:00, after the lunch rush.”

“Good to know.” He stuck his hand out to shake. “I’m Javier, by the way.” She continued to smile as she gave him her name. When she took his hand she gave a good firm shake, not like one of those women who went limp as soon as they shook a man’s hand. Javier liked her even more.

He fished a few bills out of his wallet. “Can I maybe stop by after your shift, take you to lunch sometime?”

“You can do me one better than that.” She reached down to grip the lid and spun the cup. He saw her name and seven digits scribbled in Sharpie. “My phone number’s on the cup.”

Javier gave her the eyebrows, very much enjoying how direct she was. It was nice to get a clear signal from a pretty lady, instead of having to play guessing games and worry about overstepping. He pursed his lips and nodded in approval.

“You do that for all your customers?”

“Just the best tippers.” And there was her pretty smile and her wink again, so soon after the first one.

Javier decided to give her both barrels. He put his hand out again, palm up instead of a handshake. When she put her hand in his he lifted her knuckles to his lips and pressed a soft kiss, giving her a look from under his eyelashes before he let go.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Javier picked up the cup and left, and gave her a warm smile through the glass as he walked away. As soon as he got to the office he jotted her name and the number on a scrap of paper and tucked it into his wallet. He felt hopeful in a way that he hadn’t for a long time, and he rolled the cup endlessly between his palms while he considered his options. Options. Something he sometimes had taken for granted in life, until those moments where they suddenly ran out.

Javier drained the last of the coffee and then scribbled over her number with a Sharpie before tossing the cup in the trash. No sense in letting her number out into the world where some creep might find it. He smoked his third cigarette of the day out on the plaza and thought about her smile, the brush of her fingers on his, the way she approached him directly. He could use a friend in town, one who wasn’t a guy at the agency or an old college buddy. One who was soft and sweet and might be open to a date… or more. He checked his watch and calculated the hours until 1:00 p.m.

Normally he wouldn’t go back to the coffee shop until tomorrow morning, but it wouldn’t hurt to pop back over there today at the end of her shift, see if she wanted to grab lunch, right? He hoped it wouldn’t scare her off, going back so quickly. He stubbed out his cigarette in the ashtray by the lobby door and jogged back up to his office, taking the stairs two at a time. He wanted to finish up, get this meeting over with, see if he could get over to the coffee shop before she left. He sat in the meeting, watching the clock hands spin slowly, listening to someone drone on about a budget issue that didn’t impact his work, and which could have been a memo in the first place. He felt his irritation creep up the longer the meeting went on.

Finally the meeting closed and Javier hopped to his feet. He told Bill he was headed to lunch and then jogged back down the stairwell instead of waiting for the elevator. He walked the few blocks to the coffee shop, keeping an eye on his watch. He hoped he wouldn’t miss her.

When he got to the coffee shop he opened the door and let his eyes adjust to the dim light for a moment. And then he saw her, slinging her bag over one shoulder and coming out from behind the counter. Javier smiled.

She stopped a foot away and smiled softly, “Hey.”

Javier realized he was still wearing his sunglasses, no wonder it was so dark. He took them off and slipped them into his blazer pocket. He really hoped she wouldn’t think it was weird, him coming back so soon.

“Hey, I’m glad I caught you. Are you busy, or can I take you to lunch today?”

Her face lit up. Good sign. ���No, I’m not busy. I’d love to go.”

She gestured out the big window, “There’s a sandwich place around the corner, and a park we can go sit in.”

Javier felt his face split into a wide grin. “That’s perfect.”

---

Just-here-for-the-moment’s masterlist

The only tag list I have: @quica-quica-quica @anaaaispunk @justanotherblonde23 @gracie7209 @nicolethered @honestly-shite @driedgreentomatoes @dihra-vesa @1800-fight-me @the-queen-of-fools @juletheghoul @kesskirata @honeymandos @silverwolf319 @mourningbirds1 @greeneyedblondie44 @spacedilf @maxwell–lord @anxiousandboujee @cevvie @sherala007 @writeforfandoms @libellule2001 @deadhumourist @mandoalorian @javierpinme @eri16 @mandocrasis

[rwbyvein]

Firen Lhain: Chapter 1208: Queen of Hearts Overture:  Part II / III

Nora and Penthesilea stood on the top of the Skywalker as Ruby rode up. Balios landed on the top, still using his wings to maintain his balance. "Hey, guys!" Ruby exclaimed. Penthesilea just smiled at her.

"SWOOPING TIME!" Nora exclaimed.

"Weiss wanted to come, but..." Ruby said, and looked back to see Weiss riding a white Gryphon.

"What about Weiss-Weiss?" Nora asked, and Penthesilea gave her a curious look. "Like Weiss, but Weissier?"

"She and Ironwood..." Ruby tried to say.

"Ut." Penthesilea interupted her.

"Ut?" Ruby asked.

"I do believe he wishes for us to use his given name." Penthesilea replied.

"J-ames." Ruby voiced, "Still weird to say."

"He is pretty iron-y." Nora quipped.

"I suppose he is." Penthesilea replied, "But he did ask us earnestly."

"It's kind of my fault." Ruby uttered.

"What about Susie?" Nora asked.

Ruby looked back to see her riding the wind, flying up towards Hyperborea. She slowed down and the two flew alongside each other. She looked over at them.

"I guess she's waiting for us?" Ruby asked.

"What about the T-rex?" Nora eagerly asked.

Penthesilea looked over, causing the other two to follow her gaze. He was standing on top of the Indominable with Schwartzesonne behind him. "I believe they will be providing close-quarters protections." Penthesilea then grew her wings. "Along with those not so blessed."

Weiss' Gryphon landed on the Skywalker ahead of the others. "Pardon my daliance."

"Let's go!" Ruby shouted.

"Can I have a ride?" Nora asked.

"Sure!" Ruby replied.

Balios turned away until Ruby paused and looked back at Weiss. "I will be remaining in reserve." Weiss stated.

Ruby sighed, "Everyone is in reserve."

"Defense in depth." Penthesilea added.

"I've totally heard Jaune say that." Nora said, "At least a few times. It seemed important."

"It is of the utmost importance." Weiss quipped.

* * *

The Indominable's main batteries fired, causing tremendous explosions to erupt in the swarm. As the bodies of the lancers fell down, the colossal form behind them became more visible. It appeared like the others, but far, far larger. It's lower abdomen was white, with a large red heart on it. Another volley from the Indominable's cannons caused even more and more of the lancers to fall. From here the Pyrebirds appeared. They appeared like flamingos, with the bills of toucans lit on fire. Penthesilea flew just ahead of Balios. She turned towards, her wings disappeared as her shield was held in front of her. Nora jumped onto the shield and Penthesilea used it to launch her into the air. Nora fired her hammer to give her altitude as Penthesilea's wings returned, a dory appearing in her right hand.

Hyperborea fired his Hard-Light Dust thrusters to move ahead of the others. He used his Wind Dust to create a great shock of wind. He rammed through the first flight of Pyrebirds, extinguishing their flames and knocking most of them to the ground. He pulled off to the left as Penthesilea and Susan rode through, taking on a number before pulling left as well. The Indominable's main batteries fired another volley. Many more of the small Lancers were destroyed, along with another wing of Pyrebirds. Nora's hammer landed on the Queen of Hearts' head, causing her to falter. Nora glided down and to the left. She came around to where Penthesilea was. Penthesilea rolled with her back to the ground, shield held above her. Nora landed on the shield only to get launched upwards again.

Hyperborea crashed form the top rear of the swarm, coming out the right side nearest the airships. The Queen of Hearts' large, scythe-like forelimbs swiped at him, only to deflect off the shock of wind. Another volley from the Indominable's main batteries came, battering the Queen of Hearts, but she just screamed and seemed to get more angry. With the swarms largely removed, Ruby flew Balios in. She Petal Burst out of her saddle, with Balios pulling to the side. She came out of the Petal Burst with Crescent Rose pointed behind her. She fired her and move into another Petal Burst.

Penthesilea flew in. He wings collapsed at the last moment as the scythe-like forelimbs clashed against her shield. Ruby broke out of her Petal Burst, and scythed off the limb. She landed on Penthesilea's shield, whom threw her upwards. Penthesilea spun around and dove. She opened her wings and fired her thrusters, allowing her to quickly pull up and shoot through the swarm, he sword slashing many as she passed through it, Susan following behind her and slashing even more. Ruby came out of her Petal Burst, using her scythe to swing herself around the Queen of Hearts. She fired Crescent Rose, launching herself into another Petal Burst upwards. The Queen of Hearts' remaining scythe-like forelimb slashed at her, only to strike empty petals and wind. She instead slashed back around her, only to clash with Susan's colossal, curved sword. Ruby then took her head off with another blow of her scythe.

The swarm immediately started to break. The Rusted from the Rain flew above and ahead of the Indominable, it's cannons firing at the disparate groups. Ruby landed on Balios, and turned back towards the crowd. Nora transformed her hammer into a mortar and started firing into the crowd. Penthesilea grabbed her shield, and threw it through a swarm, in a spiral ricochet until it returned to her. Ruby flew by, slashing half a dozen with each swipe of her scythe.

* * *

Jaune stood on the bow of the Indominable with Ilia clutched up against him. Behind him Yang was waiting eagerly while Blake was off in her own little world. Ahead of them, hundreds of Grimm bodies, and one colossal, fell, dissolving in front of them.

* * *

Tyrannosaur swooped down, swiping away a half-dozen Beowulves with this wings. His head angled upwards and let out a roar. Ruby landed on a raised bluff near him. "You roar?!" Ruby asked, "That's so cool!" She then clutched Wolf's Howl, threw her head back and howled. The howl echoed about a few times. Jaune landed a moment later between the two.

"Keep your eyes open, Queen of the Rose Guard!" Jaune said to her as he put Ilia down. She quickly disappeared into a cloak. Hyperborea made to set down as Blake swung from his arm. Yang landed firmly a moment later. Gog landed harshly, Ren softly, and Hecatoncheir like a stone.

Ciel landed between Jaune and Ruby. "M'Lord." she affirmed.

"Wait, what does the Rose Guard do?" Ruby nervously asked, and Jaune glared at her.

"You being you, M'Lady." Ciel said to her.

"Wait, I'm a lady?" Ruby asked.

"Just don't stray too far." Jaune said, as Coeurl's legs extended behind them, holding station 30 metres above the ground. It's two arms, two multi-use Dust Arms, and turret all moved independantly.

* * *

Bombadier Palamir sat in the turret and a stuck her head out towards the commander's seat. "Yo, boss."

"Bossing?" Ames replied as he turned to look at her.

"A small smaller Grimm, but not really anything we need a pair of Paladin Line Rifles to deal with."

"Noted." Ames replied, "Keep your eyes open."

"You got it, boss." Palamir replied.

* * *

The Proudclad floated overhead, opening it's cargo bay. A number of Briarios Paladins jumped out, with an army of White Knights falling behind them. They formed up and moved out in formation with the Paladins in the lead.

Yang looked down from atop Tyrannosaur, "Like, shit, we're actually doing this, huh?"

"You doubted us?" Tyrannosaur's vocober voiced.

"It's just like... hitting me..." Yang voiced.

Ciel climbed up with her and stood up properly, "This is making and unexpected amount of sense."

* * *

Ruby had Balios fly down to the ground and gallop along, Ruby cleaving groups of Grimm with her scythe.

* * *

Schwartzesonne appeared to stride along, beguiling how fast the long legs could carry her. She smashed Grimm left and right.

* * *

A bullhead lowered to the ground and opened up. Pwyll, Rhiannon and Wilhelmina stepped off. Pwyll ran out to Jaune, while the other two loitered. Ciel approached Rhiannon and curtseyed. "I would like to thank you for allowing me to accompany you."

"It was my mistress' request." Rhiannon replied, "And I thank you for taking my thoughts into consideration."

"It is a pleasure." Ciel neutrally replied.

Yang looked Wilhelmina in the eyes before grabbing her head and pulling out her scroll.

* * *

Nora looked at her scroll.

Yang: Me and Billy are going to wreck them.

Nora: Billy

Nora: LMAO

Nora: Give her a kiss for me.

* * *

Yang kissed Wilhelmina on the side of her head. "Let's go fuck them up."

Wilhelmina let out a positive snort in reply.

* * *

Jaune, Ciel, and Yang rode about. Jaune cutting down Grimm with his bill, Ciel would disappear from Rhiannon's back, reappearing to strike multiple Grimm, before reappearing once again on her saddle. Wilhelmina, but contrasts, electrified her horns and just crashed through groups of Grimm, Yang punching anyone that got too close.

Ruby Petal Burst behind Ciel on Rhiannon's back. "Hey, guys."

"'sup?" Yang asked her.

"Need help?" Ruby asked.

"Nah." Yang replied.

"We're good." Jaune said. Ruby Petal Burst onto the back of Pwyll. She kissed Jaune on the cheek before Petal Bursting away as Balios swooped overtop of them.

* * *

The rooks flew up, dropping Paladins. In total there was 32 Ironmen, 16 Cormorants, Dullahan's and Phalanxes, and 6 Vimy's. After them, the transports with Knights and infantry. 4 companies, each with 3 platoons of knights 2A2 dropped while bullheads landed with a platoon each of infantry. With them came teams of Iron Knights.

* * *

3 platoons of Dragon Knights stood atop the Indominable before jumping off.

* * *

The Rusted from the Rain opened it's cargo doors, with 3 companies of Green Knights dropping. A couple of bullheads landed with their infantry. The rangers quickly dispersed, only to have more bullheads arriving, this time with four squadrons of light cavalry atop Destriers, with four squadroms of Knights-Kentauros dropping behind them.

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Emp-Ire “The King.”

“I am starting to think that the oracle was screwing with us.”

“Silence!” One of the men barked, clapping Ramirez across the back of the head with an open palm. Ramirez jerked forward with a grunt of pain, and seeing that, Adam was having the sudden, sneaking suspicion that…. Everything wasn’t what it seemed to be.

At first, the whole thing had screamed of elaborate tourism. Let the tourists show up and think they are going on some cool quest, and then make them overpay to meet with some lady who was just super high, but the way these men were acting…

Adam was beginning to agree with Ramirez.

If their adventure as Sheriff’s deputies had been real then wasn’t there all the likelihood that this was real as well? Just because you show up to someplace exotic doesn't mean it was designed like that to amuse you. He wouldn’t take a hop and a skip over to Japan and just assume that the different customs there were an elaborate ploy to get money off of tourists….

Well maybe on Earth that sort of thing could totally happen, but looking at these men…. Their physiques, their clothing,their weapons, and the very real, point of their spears, he was becoming aware that maybe they had stumbled on something a lot more serious than they had first thought.

Shit.

He seemed to have a habit of doing things like that.

He glanced around at the small contingent of men who walked with them. As he had noticed before each and every one of them was absolutely shredded, not necessarily in the bodybuilder kind of way, but in a way that made it clear these guys never skipped leg day, arm, day or cardio. 

Adam and Ramirez were no slouches; by comparison, both of them hitting the gym at least five times a week for an hour at least, but in comparison?

And of course they didn’t hide it either. 

Each of the men carried a massive circular shield and spears taller than they were. They had on sandals with greaves and simple leather wraps, most of them were bare chested, though their commanding officer wore a breastplate, all of them wore helmets.

“Laconia!” 

His sudden exclamation startled the man as well as Ramirez, 

“Shit, I just realized why that sounded familiar.”

One of the men turned to look at his commanding officer, “I do not think they are Athenians, sir.” He glanced back at Adam, “Too dumb.”

The other men laughed at his expense. Adam frowned, “Sorry my knowledge of ancient greek geographical locations isn’t up to snuff.”

He was silenced with another slap to the head, and with his ears ringing and one eye fuzzy, he finally accepted that this was, in fact, not a joke. Somehow, for some reason that dumbass oracle had sent them out to get potentially sacrificed by a group of Neospartans, and he doubted they were going to be able to sue for damages.

It took almost the whole day to make it to “Sparta” itself, though he became aware of their approaching closeness when small dwellings began appearing on the edge of fields. It was only when he figured out that Spartans needed to eat too that he realized not ALL of them were going to be big buff badasses. Of course, that was until he saw the farmer pulling the plow, who was in fact Hercules’s cousin on his father Zeus’s side.

Okay so maybe things were a bit different.

He was under the impression back during the age of real Sparta, a lot of spartan citizens were just normal people and it was only a select few who were turned into warriors. Women, while they had some rights than in other places, were still expected to stay home and take care of things while the men were off at war. She had to be strong, but that was only because she was expected to raise spartan sons, or something like that. He couldn’t remember exactly how that sort of thing worked, he wasn’t a historian. For all he knew Spartan women were just as shredded as the men.

A truth that seemed apparent for thee spartans because, as they made it to the next little farming house, a woman turned to look at them and damn it was like the Amazons met the spartans. She wasn’t particularly tall by anyone’s standards, but she looked like did mixed martial arts for a living.

He had no doubt she could probably kick his ass.

Ramirez had gone rather silent as he looked around  nodding to himself every so often as they were dragged through the outlying villages and farms, and eventually up a set of stone steps leading into a city which was surrounded by lush medeteranian hills and grasslands on either side.

The city itself was no slouch either. It wasn’t as artistically expressive as New Athens had been, ut there was no shortage of statues, and interesting architecture. Walking down the street, everyone they met was shredded or well on their way to becoming so. The men, the women, everyone but the children.

He noticed a few differences from ancient histories, including but not limited to the fact that the women were just as armored as the men, the many races and ethnicities, and the strange assortment of modern day dogs that roamed the place, which he thought was a strange addition.

A line of marching soldiers passed by wearing their red and gold, and as they went Ramirez turned his head to follow them, “Welp, I am pretty sure I had a dream like this once.”

“Did you dream include us dying horribly?”

“Does being crushed between someone's thighs count?”

Adam sighed and rolled his eyes to the heavens, “how can you be thinking like that at a time like this?”

“How can you not, I am scared and way turned on and it is the most confusing feeling I have ever had in my life…. Aren't you just a little?”

Adam frowned and was surprised to find that, “No, he didn’t think so. He was JEALOUS of plenty of these men, but none of the men or women caught his eye in that way, at least he didn't think so.”

Ramirez stared at him and shook his head sadly.

“What?”

“Still thinking about your breakup huh?”

“No I’m not.”

“Quiet.” One of the men hissed raising a hand to backhand one of them, though he stopped as a voice called out from before them.

“Captain NIcos, you have returned from your patrol.”

It was a woman’s voice this time, and as they looked up an armored figure stepped down from the steps to the columned temple. She wore a bright golden breastplate, knee length red skirt and golden greaves and bracers. An attendant at her shoulder carried her Helm, though she kept hold of her spear and circular shield. She was at least six feet tall and had a body like the she hulk though her face was exceptionally beautiful as well, with large brown eyes and full lips. 

The man raised his spear to her, “Queen Xanthia.”

The man around them raised their spears as well.

She stepped forward over the stone, “What have you found here.” She used the tip of her spear to reach under Ramirez’s chin and tilt his head back, “Athenians?’

“They say they are ‘from Athens, but not “Athenian.” Captain Nicos said shoving Adam forward so he tripped and fell to his knees on the hard stone.

She grunted and turned her attention to him, tilting his head back to look at her, “Is this true, not-an-Athenian.”

He crinched away from the blade of her spear, “I’m Mericandian actually, Terran, Earthling.”

There were a couple grunts of surprise from around the group.

“Tourists.” Ramirez piped in.

Xanthia frowned, raising her chin, “And how did you end up on Laconia. We don’t encourage tourists here.” 

“Would you believe it if I said that asshole of an oracle sent us here.” He raised his hands, “We meant no disrespect of course, we just came here to see the sights and then leave.”

Ramirez nodded.

There was another muttering from the crowd. She had an eyebrow raised, “The oracle you say?”

The two of them nodded again, not sure where this was going.

She turned her head to Captain Nicos, “Keep a close eye on them, I will speak with the king”

She turned on her heels and walked off, passing through the double doors with a swish of her red cloak, leaving the two of them still kneeling on the rough stone.

They turned to look at each other in nervous confusion, not entirely sure where this was going. Overhead the sky had dimmed to a dull blue and torches were being lit all up the city streets. The young man who was doing the lighting had the look of a classic greek hero with tight curly hair and a body borrowed from a demigod.

The two of them didn’t say anything until the doors opened and the queen walked back out, “The king wishes to see the intruders.”

Two guards held the doors opened as they were forced to their feet and up the steps. The interior of the room was bare and blunt, no more than stone pillars and a single uncomfortable throne carved out of sharp marble blocks, on which sat the manliest man he had likely ever seen. Xanthia walked over and sat in the identical throne next to him, and together it seemed as if they were being pulled before the throne of the very gods themselves.

This man was godlike, but not the kind of overly muscled where he can't even touch his own head. This was probably what peak human performance looked like with a neatly shaved beard and thick dark hair. Adam glanced over at Ramirez again, to see the other man was nodding in great approval of this development. He turned his head back to the man who stood very slowly, his armor clinking. He wore a short sword on one hip and carried a spear in one hand, and when he moved, he moved with the grace of someone who knew exactly what he was doing, and where his body was at all times.

He walked down the steps and looked the two of them over with steely golden eyes, like those of a wolf.

His gaze fell on Adam for a long hard moment, “I see we have been graced by the presence of a foreign general.” He said turning back and stepping up the stone steps.

There was a murmuring in the room around them.

Adam blinked in surprise, “You know who I am.”

The Spartan king stood before his seat, but did not sit down, “Well of course.”

He held up his arm so Adam could see the scrolling holographic image across his wrist, “Just because I live like a spartan doesn’t mean I subjugate my life to not knowing what goes on in the universe. In fact as King it is my duty to know what important developments are being made in this galaxy.”

He turned his head to look at Adam ,”I am loyal to this galaxy and the ideals upon which humanity has befriended aliens.” He walked across the stone, “And you Admiral Vir  are an important linchpin in that model.”

He turned to wave a hand at Ramirez, “And of course I know a Marine when I see one.”

Another muttering from around the room.

So, this is sort of not what he expected. The Spartan king was well versed in intergalactic politics, and was no slouch intellectually either.

“So, you’ll let us go then.”

The man did not smile, but the way his eyes twinkled, almost menacingly did not give Adam much hope.

“Oh I never said that.” He turned and paced back in the other direction, “You see, Admiral, I have become aware of an unfortunate pattern in humanity’s political history, and this includes the fall of empires due to poor or weak leaders.” he turned on the spot, “I had given up hope in being able to influence the intergalactic stage, but finding you here has…. Given me an idea.”

Oh no.

“I want to see just what kind of men are being tasked with keeping this galaxy together. I want to know if you can do what needs to be done, when it needs to be done. I want to make sure that my people are in good hands, when their good is out of mine.”

“What are you talking about.”

“I want to make sure you are a brave leader, and that you can fight when is necessary.”

He made a motion with his hands and Ramirez was dragged off to the side.

A group of Spartans stepped up and grabbed Adam around the arms hauling him to his feet.

“Bring him to the training field.” The king said, and the group of men dragged him forward and out the doors.

Adam tried to protest but he was silenced as he was dragged from the doors, down the walkway and into a large lit arena with a sandy dirt floor. A large group of men were practicing here with their spears and shields, but cleared off as soon as an order was barked.

“What are you doing!” Adam demanded

“Consider this your greek trial, Admiral.” The king said taking his own spear and tossing it to Adam, who caught it in one hand, “Fight, and let’s see what you can do.” “But I-”

He was handed a shield, and then the group began to pull back.

The king stepped up onto the arena wall and paced down it’s length, “Lets see if you can beat one of my men first, and we will go from there.”

He motioned a hand and ordered one of the younger men forward. He couldn’t have been that old and was not nearly as well put together as the others, but he held his spear and shield with some confidence.

Ok…. this was going to get interesting.

He knew there was nothing he could do to stop them, so Adam dropped into a crouch.

The shield felt awkward and heavy on his arm, but the spear was a familiar weight. They circled for a short time before the boy came charging at him. He could see what the king was doing. This boy was young and had probably trained repeatedly in drills but had never sued weapons in practice..

He was meant to be easy to beat.

Adam stepped to the side and caught the boy’s foot sending him staggering away. Adam used the shield to knock him further off balance and sent him plowing into the dirt.

No one made a sound.

It wasn’t that impressive. That was SUPPOSED to be easy.

“So at least you have SOME training.” The king called. Overhead a shooting star crossed over the heavens. A crowd trickled onto the stands of the arena.

He motioned someone else forward. She too was young, but the set of her face and a scar down her right cheek showed that she had at least SEEN combat at some point. The way she eyed Adam told him that she knew what she was doing.

Her problem?

She was likely to set i nher fighting abilities, not creative enough. He traded a couple of strikes with her, gaging her ability before making his move. He used his shield as a distraction to cover some of his movement so she couldn't see, and then sent a lightning fast jab. He struck a hit hard on the side of her helmet sending her plowing to the Arena floor.

Still no one made a sound.

The king nodded slowly and motioned someone else forward.

This man was an actual soldier, though likely no great shakes, but at least he knew what he was doing. Adam ended up in a sharp flurry of contact before the shield got in his way and he almost took a hard blow to the shoulder , even so he ended up with a delicate cut along the side of his cheek. It was only by way of quick thinking that he was able to duck under one of the swipes and kick the man hard in the sternum. He went flailing back into the dirt, and Adam couldn’t help but whisper to himself.

“And this is sparta bitch.”

The kind paced around him in a wide circle, “So, someone has trained you in the use of the spear.”

Adam growled, “I was trained to fight aliens with four arms, so you are going to have to try harder.”

The king smiled, “Confidence…. Always a good sign. But the shield, I think you have not been trained to use one of those.”

Adam paused nodded, and then threw the shield to the ground kicking it away.

He took the spear up in two hands, in a distinctly different style from the spartans, “Well, come on then.”

WIth the shield gone and his switch back to using a spear like he had been trained he defeated the next three challenges with relative impunity. It was only when the king stared adding extra fighters did Adam struggle.

They clashed hard, Adam ducking dodging and sometimes jumping over swings from his opponents. He dived into the dirt, rolled onto his back and caught two spears as they hurtled down at him. He kicked one in the side of the knee and he went down. Adam lunged for the hit, spun on the spot and caught the second spear as it came down for him again. He brought the but of his spear up and hit the woman in the face before spinning back in the other direction, dodging an oncoming jab and slammed his spear into the back of his opponent’s head sending them sprawling to the ground.

He was breathing heavily now but he could see and hear some of the men and women muttering in surprise.

The king nodded, “This is heartening, I must say. It seems as if our leaders CAN fight.”

Someone was motioned forward and he was handed a rag to wipe his face and a canteen of water. He drank greedy wiping his mouth and tossing the leather skin back to the young woman who had brought it to him.

“But I think I do see one deficiency.”

He took a waiting spear from one of his followers, waved off a shield and stepped into the ring.

Men and women all around the circle leaned forward in anticipation. Adam readied himself.

The king stepped forward.

Adam could already tell this wasn;t going to be easy.

He was already tired, the kind was fresh.

But still he was ready, the two men circled and then Adam lunged forward in the way the Drev had taught him, The king batted it away and they made an exchange. The man didn’t try to attack him, but seemed content on seeing what Adam could do. Their engagement must have lasted for thirty minutes as they clashed, the king slowly escalating over that time. The longer they went the more energized the other man became. Adam thought if he could just hold out until the other man grew tired as well, then maybe he would have an upper hand.

But it never happened.

Adam gasped for air.

Even after what must have been thirty minutes of continual engagement, the other man only seemed to be breathing steadier and more deeply. All together they had been fighting longer and harder than all of the other previous engagements put together, and still the man was not tired. Adam watched as the man specifically did not take openings that should have killed Adam.

He knew he was trying to make some sort of point.

Adam was breathing in ragged gasps now. He had never been so tired in all his life, he came in for a lunge he knew was sloppy, and his spear was kicked from his hand. A sandals foot hit him in the chest and he went down choking. The king stood over him nodding, “I am impressed by your skill” He turned and waved to the crowd, “You could match any man or woman here hand to hand in a fair fight, but you do have one deficiency.”

Adam gulped and panted.

The king crouched next to him, “No stamina.”

He stood again, “You train with my men tomorrow, and so does your marine. We will make Spartan’s out of you yet!”

Adam gasped coming to his knees, “Wait… but I-”

“You came here for vacation, and I am sorry to inform you that will not be so. You will not be leaving until I am satisfied our galaxy is in the Best hands.”

Adam stood crawling to his feet with great effort.

The king even smiled at him this time, which seemed strange to him somehow. He held out a hand and Adam took it, “A pleasure to fight with you Admiral, I am James king of the Spartans.”

Adam frowned, “James?’ Not Kyros or something?”

“I was born in the northern provinces of Mericanda, of course I don’t have a greek name.”

He clapped Adam on the shoulder and then walked off joined by his queen and their entourage as he shouted orders vanishing into the night.

Adam stared after him.

So, the king of Sparta was Canadian? 

[beanie-beebo-writes]

Imagine/one shot

Summary: You and a group of friends go ghost hunting (per usual) when things go wrong.

Warnings: None

Masterlist

You told yourself you would never be that group in a horror movie, the stupid one that goes to investigate an abandoned building with a "keep out" sign posted onto the fence. But you couldn't help yourself. The thrill you felt walking into the old and supposedly haunted asylum, just like any other building you'd explored, was beyond words.

Though, this particular building had a weird feeling once you crossed the east wing, and you were starting to doubt coming in, in the first place.

"Guys, come on. Maybe we should turn back." You said.

"Are you kidding (Y/N)?! We've hit the motherboard of all motherloads!" Your friend Jamie said.

His flashlight was tucked under his arm as he dug through a bunch of files stashed under a dusty bed frame. Your other friend, Natasha, agreed with him.

"What's wrong? Are you chickening out for once?" She teased.

"No, course not." You sighed. "I just don't like the vibe I'm getting here."

"How's it any different than the other places we've been to?" She asked.

"It just is." You said.

"Well I don't know about you two, but I'm staying unless if I'm given a reason not to. If you want to be a baby about it, suit yourself." Jamie said.

"Jamie, knock it off. I'm serious." You said. "I've felt things before, but nothing like this."

"Whatever." He said, continuing to search remnants of what looked like some sort of day room.

You sighed and held your backpack straps tighter. You were already in the building, and figured you could brush off the feeling for now.

You had almost forgotten about the feeling as the three of you joked around, investigated, and searched through what was left in the place. Around halfway through the wing, you stumbled across what seemed to be a jumbled altar, making your stomach drop.

"You should have listened to the girl."

You turned around at the voice you first thought was in your own head to find another woman standing several feet behind you.

"Who are you?" Natasha asked.

"Can't you see we already have a spot to investigate? Get lost." Jamie said.

"Jamie! Please excuse our friend, he doesn't seem to know manners apparently." Natasha said, eyeing him.

The woman chuckled. "Investigating huh? I mean, I would but.. what's the point if you already know?"

She blinked, replacing her brown eyes with an inky black. The three of you backed up and gasped.

"And I thought you were investigators, a pity really." The demon mocked.

"A demon?" You asked.

"In the flesh."

Suddenly you thought back to a tv show you watched and remembered there was an exorcism these people had performed to banish the demon. You gathered your courage with a deep breath and began to recite.

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii, omnis legio, omnis congregatio et secta diabolica, ergo draco maledicte, ut ecclesiam tuam secura, tibi facias libertate servire, te rogamus, audi nos!"

You opened your eyes to still see the demon in front of you. You furrowed your brows in confusion.

"You done?" She asked.

"It didn't work?" You quietly asked yourself.

"Of course it doesn't work you fucking idiot. You really think that tv show bullshit actually works?" She said, apparently hearing you.

"It was worth a shot. Latin is latin." You said to mainly no one but yourself.

"Please. As if a language can actually work to send us back. Get a load of this idiot."

You all stared in absolute fear at what would unfold and the powerful entity that somehow stood in front of you. What you didn't expect was for two men to practically appear from nowhere behind the demon.

"Actually, I'd say she's pretty smart." The shorter one said.

Before a word could come out of the demon's mouth, the taller man came from around a corner and stabbed the demon from the backside. As it lit up in an orange color, you and your friends could only look on in horror, not really sure what was happening.

"Woah woah, guys, it's okay. We're the good guys, I can promise you that." The taller one said, seeing you were all slowly backing further into the wing.

"And you are..?" Natasha asked fearfully.

"I'm Sam, this is my brother Dean. We hunt things."

"Why the hell were you in-" Dean started before looking down at your hands. "Don't tell me."

You looked down at your EMF reader and back up at the brothers in confusion.

"Uh, thanks for saving us." You said.

"Well we wouldn't have to if you would just stay out like you're supposed to!" Dean said.

"Dean," Sam began.

"No Sam, it has to be said! I'm tired of saving idiots. If it says stay out, stay out. Got it?!" Dean finished.

"Yes sir." Jamie said.

You and Natasha looked at him like he grew a second head, as he usually wasn't this nice.

"What?" Jamie asked.

"Nothing. Can we go now guys?" You asked.

"Yeah." Your friends both said.

Dean rolled his eyes as he and his brother headed out behind you.

[1-800-roflmao]

Wash Day Delight Pt. 7

Rating:  General Audiences

WARNINGS:  None

Fandom:  Undertale (Video Game)

Relationships:  Papyri Harem.  

Characters:  Papyrus (UT!Pap), Reader, Blue (US!Sans), Willow (HT!Pap), Mutt (FSR!Pap), Red (UF!Sans), Coffee (FSG!Pap), Oak (HT!Sans), and Mentions of Other AU Skeletons

If you prefer reading on AO3

*Willow is here to save the Reader’s toes after that trip through the void.  She finally gets to have her shower and ponder.  Meanwhile, the guys discuss downstairs and Coffee reminds them Google is a thing.

*Bonus: Fluffy Willow moments.

PREVIOUS || FIRST || NEXT

Papyrus was never a fan of shortcuts and not just because his brother borderline abused them.  No, he didn’t enjoy the pervasive feel of the void around him.  The cold of Snowedin never bothered him, but the void’s cold always managed to sink and settle into his bones no matter how short their time was spent in the odd space.  By the way he could feel the human in his arms shivering lightly let him know she was feeling it as well.  Finally, the inky blackness of the void seemed to pull before snapping and his well lit home falling into place around him was almost blinding. ��

“ALRIGHT, YOU CAN OPEN YOUR EYES,” Blue had yet to release his grip on Papyrus’s arm as he used it for leverage to check on their friend.  She was slowly unfurling from the fetal position she had curled into during their trip.  Had she been that cold?  His sockets took in her attire and he mentally kicked himself for not realizing how light her clothing was.  And humans were more sensitive to temperature to boot.

“APOLOGIES!  I SHOULD HAVE GRABBED A BLANKET FOR YOU.” Papyrus wanted to help rub some warmth into the bared skin of her arms and legs, but he doubted his frozen bones would do much good right now.  Even Blue was resisting touching her right now.  

She had unfurled as much as she dared and patted his chest before trying to speak.  Her teeth chattered shortly into her effort and she quickly closed her mouth with a little embarrassed huff.  He managed to stifle a giggle at the cute display as she took a moment to rub her hands together and blow hot air into her palms before pressing the warmed skin into her cheeks and rubbing more.  Blue didn’t bother hiding his chuckles and she sent him a pouty glare, “N-not f...f-f… fun-ny!” she pushed out.

Blue just grinned as he lifted a hand and made a show of removing his glove, “NOT FUNNY SHE SAYS!” he cackled as her glare quickly melted into horror and panic as the energetic skeleton hovered his hand over her bare leg.  

“D-don’t you d-are!”  she chattered, legs jerking slightly as she seemed to be holding back from moving too much.  Papyrus could feel her jump as Blue dropped his hand lower playfully.  

“OKAY, THAT’S EN-EH!!!” his statement was cut off as a new pair of skeletal hands came into view and plucked the shivering human from his arms swiftly.  It took a moment for his mind to catch up with what just happened as he snapped his head up to see who had stolen his friend.

“WILLOW!” It had been Blue calling his doppelganger’s nickname as they both watched the towering skeleton adjust his hold on her so she was pretty much sitting in the crook of his arm, tucked against his side, with his palm cupping her feet as his fingers gently rubbed at her toes.  She seemed to be shivering less and less, relaxing into Willow’s hold even as said skeleton fussed over and at her.  Papyrus and Blue weren’t exempt from a scolding though as Willow turned his attention to them and wasted no time falling into a lecture.

“I UNDERSTAND YOU TWO WERE EXCITED TO HAVE OUR FRIEND OVER TODAY, BUT THAT IS NO EXCUSE TO RUSH AND FORGET NECESSITIES LIKE SOCKS AND SHOES!  HUMANS LOSE MOST OF THEIR BODY HEAT THROUGH THEIR FEET!” Papyrus and Blue just resigned to their fate and bowed their heads guiltily. Thankfully, Willow’s scolding was halted by the human in his arms patting his chest.  

“That’s enough, Willow,” she hushed, for some reason looking guilty herself.  “Blue and Pap took real good care of me before the shortcut, so go easy on them, please?” The two she praised perked up.  “Plus, they weren’t the only ones excited to come over today,” she finished her plea and Willow took a moment to consider it before letting his shoulders and features relax.  

“FINE,” he gave in and sighs of relief resounded before a confused squeak escaped their guest as Willow turned around with her still cradled against his side and started making his way up the stairs.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o

“Um… Willow?” she called, trying not to look down or around.  Willow was already tall… no, tall wasn’t enough to cover just how much airspace this particular skeleton cousin took up.  Now, they were on stairs… ascending said stairs steadily and just out of her view she knew the ground floor was getting further away and the ceiling was getting closer.  She knew he wouldn’t drop her, but lord, a fall from this height would do some damage and be extra painful today especially.  

He answered with an inquiring hum, not even glancing down at the human he had pretty much kidnapped.  “Where are you taking me?” she questioned, eyes focused on his face and nothing else.  Even the sound of rushed footfalls on the stairs behind them didn’t pull her attention.  It was most likely Papyrus or Blue trying to catch up.

“TO YOUR BATH, OF COURSE,” he answered like it was the most obvious answer.  A little “oh” fell from her lips before pouting a bit as she squinted up at him.  

“I could always walk?” she put out there.  They were literally going to have her spoiled if they kept carrying her this much.  Plus, she still had that nagging feeling that as an adult she shouldn’t have things this easy.  

Willow only hummed again, but made no move to put her down even as they reached the landing and took a left to go down the long hallway.  So, no walking for her.  Knowing Blue, he probably told the whole household Papyrus’s plan to pamper her today.  

“WILLOW!” Speak of the devil and he shall appear.  No longer on the stairs, she looked just in front of them to where Blue was pretty much jogging backwards in order to stay ahead of Willow’s long gate. And Willow wasn’t letting up, but did tip his skull down to acknowledge the small skeleton.  “YOU CAN’T JUST STEAL Y/N!” he scolded, “PLUS, ALL HER STUFF IS WITH ME.”  He gestured to the pack on his back.

“AND YOU’RE HERE WITH IT, I DON’T SEE THE PROBLEM,” was Willow’s sassy reply.  Blue opened his mouth to respond, but his teeth clacked shut as words failed him.  She giggled as Blue huffed and he sent a little glare her way.  He had to scramble out the way as they had finally reached the “master bath” and Willow wasn’t wasting any time as he pushed the door open with his free hand and stepped inside.  

This was only her second time in here and it still amazed her how extravagant and expensive a bathroom of all things could feel.  If she remembered correctly, it was Black’s insistence they have at least one bath like this.  She could see his tastes echoed in the dark marble countertops and black paneling along the walls.  Wine must have had a say as well from the cozy touches like the cypress wood flooring and cabinets, decorative towels and art pieces--she’d have to ask if Coffee made some of these.  She hadn’t asked last time whose decision it was to have not only a skylight, but a floor to ceiling glass panel next to the modern soaking tub.  Thankfully, their house was outside city limits and up in the hilly area, nestled on a cliff side.  They probably have a fantastic view of the stars come night time through that window.  Right now though, all she could see was blue skies with lazy, wispy clouds.  

“Oh, that’s new,” she commented, noticing all the new plants and even what looked like a moss mat placed before the tub.  

“HM, WHAT IS?” Willow questioned as he carried her closer to the shower.   Now able to see the just as extravagant shower, she could see another of the mats in front of it as well.   Now, that she looked more closely, the little organic mats made a cute stepping stone-like trail over to the tub.  

“That,” she pointed out, fingertip following the trail before twirling to indicate all the plants in general.

Willow’s sockets widened a fraction as he realized what she was talking about before smiling, no beaming proudly.  He straightened up as much as he could while carrying her, impressive considering his back wasn’t the best.  “THAT WOULD BE MY BROTHER’S DOING!” he proclaimed, practically glowing with pride, “HE’S RECENTLY GOTTEN INTO GARDENING AND BOTANY.  OH, YOU SHOULD SEE HIS GARDEN! I MEAN… IT’S NOT IN BLOOM RIGHT NOW, BUT IT’S STILL IMPRESSIVE AND HE’S THINKING ABOUT A GREENHOUSE ONE DAY SO HE CAN GROW FRUITS AND VEGETABLES ALL YEAR ROUND FOR US TO EAT.”  He was rambling, but that was fine.  It was touching seeing his enthusiasm for his brother’s new hobby… would it be considered a hobby?  She felt better thinking of it as a passion.  “OH! I’M SORRY, I GOT OFF TRACK,” he apologized but she just shrugged.

“I don’t mind, I actually like it,” she assured.  She adjusted her grip on him as she felt him starting to crouch down.  

“GREAT! BECAUSE I HAVE MORE TO SAY!” he chirped, sockets curving just a bit as she giggled in response.  Bent at the knees, he eased her onto her own feet which left her standing between his spread femurs with her hands on his shoulders for balance as she stretched and flexed her legs to wake them up.  He continued to chat with her throughout.  “BUT MY BROTHER’S FAVORITE IS TAKING IN RESCUES,” he started and gestured to the plants in the bathroom, “THESE ARE SOME HE’S REHABILITATED.”  He had dove into telling how Oak explained that these plants in particular thrived in more humid environments, plus how he had convinced the more bourgie of their housemates to allow the plants to be kept in this bathroom.  Apparently, it had been Wine who gave in first, but it took near half the household to convince Black.  What won him over was the moss being useful for soaking up water and the plants for their air purifying qualities.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o

By the time he finished retelling the saga, she had taken a seat on one of the mats as she laughed along with him as he whispered how Black had been caught talking to one of the plants.  “HIS DEFENSE WAS THAT HE HEARD OAK TALKING TO THEM SEVERAL TIMES,” he completed his tale, his small sockets softening as he took in how even her eyes seemed to be shining with her mirth.  

“Well, I read somewhere that talking to plants actually can help them,” her words were still interrupted by cute little giggles.  Finally, she took a deep breath and held it before releasing slowly.  She had lifted a hand to fan herself and he could understand why considering the flush he could see on her cheeks and ears.  “I’m happy for Oak, it seems like he really found something he loves--aside from you, of course,” she remarked thoughtfully, “And I can hear how proud you are as well.”  

“I AM.” He had been ecstatic when his brother finally found something to focus on other than food and his condition.  All thanks to a sad little plant he had found left out to die and be thrown away with the trash one day.  It had been nothing more than a single stem with one big leaf that had shriveled and was turning brown at the edges.  

It had been confusing at first when his brother came home with it carefully cupped in his palm with soil he had dug up to cover its roots.  Oak had mumbled that he couldn’t find a pot or anything for it and he had forgotten his money at home, but it needed help, so he did what he could.  He hadn’t questioned it.  Now, that sad little plant was taller than him and outgrowing its current pot quickly, but they were waiting for the warmer months to plant it in the ground finally.  

“THE ROUTINE OF TAKING CARE OF THE PLANTS HELPS HIM TREMENDOUSLY. PLUS, TALKING TO THE PLANTS HELPS HIM AS WELL! IT STRENGTHENS HIS MEMORY,” he added, teeth quirked into a gentle smile.  She just hummed in response and he flushed a bit as he saw she was now gazing up at him with her chin resting on her braided fingers.    He wished she wouldn’t look at him like that.  So gentle, so warm, and so understanding.  It gave him hope when he knew damn well her feelings were just platonic.  Besides, he knew he didn’t stand a chance against his prime version.

Sighing, he stood up and rolled his shoulders and neck to ease the stiffness that had set in.  “WELL, I SHOULD LEAVE YOU TO IT,” he dismissed as he offered her a helping hand and pulled her to her feet; bare toes wiggling and pressing into the moss mat curiously.  He still couldn’t--no, he could believe it-- he simply couldn’t wrap his mind around how they had forgotten even shoes or socks for her.  

“Oh, I get to bathe myself?” she joked as she peeked around Willow to find Blue, but all she saw was her bag abandoned on the counter.  He must have run off while they were talking.  

Willow immediately lifted a hand to cover his now glowing cheekbones and nose ridge, “I BELIEVE THE AGREEMENT WAS THAT YOU BATHE YOURSELF.”  He heard her snort and looked down at the human as she now rummaged through her bag, pulling out a few containers, a bright colored netting of some sort, a change of clothes, and even a bath bomb.  “UNLESS YOU’VE CHANGED YOUR MIND OF COURSE,” he watched her freeze like a dear from the corner of his vision as he looked off to the side in feigned innocence, “IT IS DIFFICULT FOR YOU HUMANS TO REACH CERTAIN PLACES ON YOUR OWN, CORRECT?”  Oh, she was blushing something fierce right now.

“WILLOW!” she whined, now imitating an ostrich as she pressed her face into her bag to hide.  

“WOWIE, MY NAME SURE IS POPULAR TODAY!” he replied playfully as a muffled little scream came from the bag she was hunched over.  He chuckled and gently pushed the edge of the bag’s opening down enough so he could see her eyes peeking at him.  Well, glaring right now.  “WHY ARE YOU SO EMBARRASSED, HUMAN?  I WAS JUST TALKING ABOUT HELPING YOU WASH YOUR BACK IF YOU WANTED,” a crooked grin pulled at his teeth as her eyes narrowed further.

“Uh. Huh,” was her answer and somehow that sound carried so much attitude and meaning.  Yeah, she definitely didn’t buy it, but at least she was finally emerging from the bag and finishing unpacking what she needed.  He smiled as he saw her pull out a pair of cute fuzzy socks.  Those would have helped earlier, but at least he wouldn’t have to hunt down a pair… most of theirs wouldn’t fit anyway.  “So, how do y’ll want ta do this?” she asked him suddenly as she started zipping up the bag  again.

“DO WHAT EXACTLY?”

She was staring for a moment, looking for any indication that he was playing dumb before finally answering, “My hair?  I told Papi I’d let him help with it, but he’s off somewhere, so I can’t ask him.”  Oh?  She’s letting Papyrus touch her hair?  He really had no chance, huh?  “But I don’t mind if more of you want to help out, too.”

“YES,” the word had jumped from his teeth as soon as she finished speaking.  Taking a deep breath and recomposing himself as her now wide eyes just blinked up at him in shock.  “I MEAN I’D LOVE TO HELP OUT… WITH YOU HAIR I MEAN,” he tried again, volume and tone hopefully more casual.  He had his hands behind his back to hide his fidgeting fingers.  

One more blink before her expression, only for a second, twisted into suspicion and curiosity.  The look was gone and replaced with something neutral, but welcoming.  Just what had gone through her mind, he wondered.  “Okay…” she dragged out the vowel a bit, “So, once again, how are we going about this?  Do y’ll want me to wash my hair and you just get to do the styling, detangling, blah blah blah… oooor-”

She quieted as Willow held up his palms to her, “WE WANT TO DO EVERYTHING.”  

“Everything?” He nodded with an eager smile, fingers curling into happy fists that were shaking from tension as he withheld pumping them excitedly.  He watched her look up to the ceiling in thought before shrugging, “Alright, so I’ll just wash up for now and save my long soak for later.”  She was thinking aloud as she picked up her bag and held it out to him, “While I’m washing, why don’t y’ll pick out some products we’ll use?  Mainly focus on the scent for now.”  

He took the bag with a nod and a surprised little rep as he felt how hefty the bag still felt.  “Yeah, we probably went overboard, but Blue figured it’s better to be over prepared than under,” she explained and he could only nod in stunned silence as he turned and started to finally leave.  

“Oh!” He paused in the doorway and looked back at her.  She had only managed to turn on the shower to start warming it up and though she wasn’t looking at him kept speaking, “You guys also need to figure out how and where we’re going to wash my hair.”    

Willow’s skull tilted and he lifted a brow bone in question, “ARE WE NOT DOING IT IN HERE?” He thought the bathroom was where humans took care of all their hygiene needs.  And shouldn’t she know how to wash her hair?  She’s supposed to show them after all.  

She just hummed and took a long look around.  “I guess we could, but…” she trailed off.  

“BUT?” he pushed, genuinely curious.

“The tub is a bit tall for me to be leaning over for a long time and I know your back wouldn’t appreciate it either, plus it would require a cup or something to dump water over my head.”  She wasn’t wrong about his back.  So, that was out.  Plus, it didn’t sound pleasant to have water dumped over one’s head over and over.  “The sink in here is higher, but that would be difficult for me.  Plus, it’s a bit shallow and once again, we’d need a cup.”  Sink was out, too, then.  

“And last, the shower.  That’s usually where I wash my hair, but it’s a bit difficult with multiple people.. At least it is if you’re not comfortable being naked or in swimsuits together,” she laughed and he blushed a bit at the intimate, domestic scene it summoned in his mind.  “Other than that, the only ways I think we could make it work up here is if I leaned over into the shower or knelt down and we used the removable shower head,” she put out the idea, but he immediately knew it wouldn’t work out.

“THE WATER PRESSURE WOULD RESULT IN A VERY MESSY… WET EXPERIENCE,” he lamented and she just nodded sagely with a little shrug.  How would they get this done?  Was it even possible?

“If it helps,” she piped up, holding a hand under the spray and feeling the temperature of the water, “We usually use the kitchen sink or a utility sink.  Ylls is still tall, but I think if I stand on a chair, it might work.”  She sent him a confident smile as he perked up at the idea, “Y’ll have time to think it over.  Plus, I want to show you all something before that anyway.”  After that, she had shooed him out and he left with a promise to talk it over with the others.  He couldn’t help wondering what she wanted to show them. 

o0o0o0o0o0o0o 

Once the door closed behind Willow, she couldn’t get out her clothes fast enough.  This bath has been due for a bit and my god it already felt heavenly on just her palm from touching the water.  Leaving her clothes on the floor right where she shed them, she went to dive into the shower before remembering she needed her soap and other supplies to actually get clean.  One naked dash to the counter to scoop up what she needed and back again,plus she tossed a shower cap on at the last minute; finally, she was able to enjoy her shower.

She debated rushing as to not keep the boys waiting, but she rarely gets to experience a rain shower like this.  It was dampened-heh-by the plastic shower cap, but overall was pleasant.  She took a moment to just bask and relax, but her mind began to wander and shower thoughts filtered in.  

Namely how all the skeletons she had interacted with today had been surprised that she was letting them do anything with her hair.  Well, they hadn’t expressed their surprise with words, but their body language and facial expressions spoke volumes.   That had been genuine surprise and shock she had seen.  Add in their eagerness to help her with her hair--adorable--and it’s obvious they’ve wanted to possibly touch her hair or ask about it for a while.  

Had she done something to make it seem like she didn’t want anyone touching her hair?  At all?  She mulled over all the time she had known the skeletons and the only things she could think of is maybe they witnessed someone touching her hair without permission and she snapped on said person.  It happens less now, but it has happened.  Even that would only make sense if they didn’t hear everything she says to the person.  She always mentions consent when she gets on people with wandering, overcurious hands and fingers.  So, they would know they just need to ask? Right?

Brow scrunching, she sighed and stepped from under the rainfall to finally start actually cleaning up.  Going through the familiar motions, she continued to turn over and pick at the mystery.  It wasn’t until near the end of her shower when she was rinsing off the suds, something clicked… “Cash.”

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

“we were startin’ ta wonder if doll changed her mind, will o’ the wisp,” a skeleton dressed in mostly black with a fur lined hood and a single gold fang jeered from his seat on the living room sofa just as Willow reached the bottom of the staircase.  A disappointed grunt followed as the taller skeleton purposely ignored his comment.

“RED, I THOUGHT YOU HAD TO WORK TODAY?” Willow inquired as he stepped into the living room, only after hearing Blue and Papyrus’s voices reprimand the gold fanged sans.  Standing in the doorway, he could now see that the two were sitting on cushions on the floor before the tv.  From the characters running and bouncing around the screen, it looked like they were playing Smash.  Leaning over the arm of the couch opposite the one Red was sitting on was Coffee.  He spared a little wave to Willow, but went back to watching the other two play.  He was probably waiting to jump in and play whoever wins. Stretched across that same couch with his fur lined hood up and obscuring his face was Mutt.  His long legs hung over the remaining arm of the couch and his arms were crossed over his chest.  He truly slept like the dead as he didn’t budge or even twitch.  His chest didn’t fall and rise in simulated breath either.   The last skeleton in the room was Willow’s brother, Oak, and he was currently snoozing as well, leaned back against the couch with his skull lolling to the side.  

“wha’, i’m not invited ta y’lls lil’ wash day thing,” Red growled, but his crimson eyelights avoiding Willow’s gaze hinted he was simply dodging the question and not offended.

Before Willow could call him out on this, Mutt surprisingly beat him to it, “him n’ sansy had a lil’ lover’s spat.”  Ah, so he wasn’t sleeping.

“would ya’ quit callin’ it that!” Red barked, scowling as chuckles only rumbled from Mutt.      

Coffee’s soft voice just barely spoke above the noise of the other two, “Red wanted to test the machine…”

Willow just arched a brow bone as he set down his hefty load on the coffee table, “AND SANS, I’M GUESSING, DID NOT?”  He looked to Red for confirmation and said skeleton huffed, crossing his arms with a frustrated scowl marring his features.

“dun know how he expects us ta know if the damn t’ing works w’itout testing it!” he mumbled, “coward doesn’t even like ta turn it on most times…”  

“WELL, IN HIS DEFENSE, THAT MACHINE IS THE REASON ALL OF US ARE HERE RIGHT NOW,” Willow’s attempt to play mediator only resulted in Red grunting and sinking more into the cushions.

Blue had handed off his controller to Coffee who eagerly vacated his spot on the couch and took Blue’s place on the floor.  “HE’S GOING TO POUT (“m’not poutin’!”) FOR A WHILE,” he stated as he moved to kneel by the coffee table.  His eye lights were glued to the bag he remembered bringing upstairs not that long ago, “WHY DO YOU HAVE HER BAG?”  He hoped she had everything she needed upstairs.

His question had Papyrus perking up behind them, but the prime doppel refused to take his sockets off the tv, “I’D LIKE TO KNOW AS WELL!” He wished he could turn and investigate, but Coffee took his games seriously and he had yet to beat the younger skeleton at any.  Maybe today would be the day.

Willow sat in Coffee’s empty spot on the couch to ease his back so he wouldn’t be bent over as much.  His weight displaced the cushions more than Coffee had and resulted in Mutt slipping down a bit further, closer to his hip and pulling at his hood.  Said skeleton didn’t complain and just let it happen, opening his unscarred socket so a rusty blood orange eyelight swiveled to look at the bag in question.  “lil’ missy plannin’ ta stay fer while?” he inquired as he took in how full it seemed.

Blue laughed, “NEVER KNOW! WE JUST WANTED TO BE PREPARED!” he chirped.

“BETTER TO BE OVER PREPARED THAN UNDER!” Papyrus joined in before squawking in surprise and muttering a little curse.  Coffee could be heard giggling softly and whispering how Papyrus had to put money in the swear jar now, on top of his impending loss.

Mutt just nodded and Willow hummed as he unzipped the bag, “SHE WANTS US TO PICK OUT WHAT PRODUCTS TO USE.”  He plucked a jar from the bag to examine.

“why’?” Red had sat up and scooted to the edge of his seat so he could see the bag’s contents better.   “shouldn’t she be tellin’ us what ta use?” he mumbled as his eyelights expanded at the amount and variety of products in the bag, “she bought da’ whole store?!”  

Blue just snickered and those snickers were growing into laughter as Mutt finally gave in to his own curiosity and sat up.  Both sockets now open and eyelights mirroring Red’s own in shock, “never thought i’d be so thankful ta not have hair.”  He rubbed a hand over his skull, “exhausted just lookin’ at all this.  No wonder they got a whole day just for washin’ hair.”  

Willow shook his head at the two with a withered sigh as he could hear Papyrus joining Blue in poorly hidden laughter.  “THEY DON’T USE ALL OF IT,” he resisted burying his face in his hands in exasperation, “HENCE WHY SHE WANTS US TO HELP CHOOSE WHICH ONES TO USE TODAY.”  He lifted the product he had already taken from the bag and wiggled it for emphasis, “WE’LL JUST PICK OUT BASICS… SHAMPOO, CONDITIONER…”  he trailed off.  It hit him that he didn’t know what exactly could be considered basics beyond that.

“We could look up the rest…” Coffee spoke up, tilting his head towards the conversation, “...there should be something about this on the internet right?”  A harsh click of a button and snap of the joystick could be heard before an anguished cry belted from Papyrus as his character went flying to the edge of the edge of the screen.   A flash of light then the announcer chiming in loudly: GAME!  He had lost once again.  “Good game, Pap…” Coffee patted the defeated monster’s back as he dramatically sobbed into his hands.

“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR THAT FROM YOU!” Papyrus whined and they could practically hear him pouting as Coffee just giggled.  

“GREAT IDEA, COFFEE!” Blue wasted no time whipping out his phone and holding it up proudly as his eyelights formed to stars, “MWEHEHEH!  WITH THIS WE WILL PICK OUT THE PERFECT ASSORTMENT AND HELP HER HAVE THE BEST WASH DAY EVER!”  

Papyrus bounced back from his crestfallen state as heard Blue’s declaration.  He joined them at the coffee table and clapped for Blue who just beamed more.  Coffee offered his own shy clap of support as he wandered over as well and settled into an empty spot on the other side of Blue.

Red’s eyelights couldn’t roll any harder at their antics. A frown still pulled at his teeth as something wasn’t sitting right with him about this situation, “thought doll didn’t like anyone messin’ wit’ her hair?” Why the sudden change of heart? The others went quiet at his question and Mutt just hummed along, the sound giving way his curiosity about this as well.

Papyrus fiddled with his hands, braiding and unbraiding his fingers, before breaking the silence that had fallen on the room, “WELL, AS YOU KNOW--from the group text--WE CONVINCED HER TO LET ME-US TAKE CARE OF HER.”  He inhaled and looked up, looking at each skeleton in the room, “I ASKED IF WE COULD HELP WITH HER HAIR…”  A soft smile lifted the corners of his teeth, “AND SHE SAID YES.”  

Nothing was said for a bit as Papyrus’s words sank in before Mutt hummed once again, “well… let’s get ta pickin’ then.”  Nods were shared in agreement.  It didn’t answer why, but it would do for now.  

Willow started them off with the product he had already.  He read the label aloud, “HAIR HONEY?”  before unscrewing the lid.  He didn’t need to lean in to get a whiff of its scent.  Not only because his naturally more sensitive sense of smell, but it was potent and the others around perked in curiosity as well.  It was sweet and warm, but not floral.  Maybe a bit fruity?  It reminded him of a tropical drink… the color of it certainly looked like honey though.  Before he could even question what it was for, he could hear Blue’s distals tapping at his screen to look it up.

“HAIR HONEY IS A BALM FOR STYLING, MOISTURIZING, AND ADDING SHINE TO HAIR,” he read, along with a few details about ingredients.  Surprisingly, the product had very little to no actual honey in it.  

“WHY CALL IT HONEY IF IT HAS NO HONEY?” Papyrus voiced the question they were all thinking as Willow replaced the lid on the jar and set it aside.

“‘n they say monsters are bad at namin’,” Red grumbled before jumping as the cushions beside him shifted and sank.  He could hear a long, loud sniff and scowled at Oak as the larger skeleton was literally following his nasal cavity to the now closed jar. “Fuckin’ ell when did you wake up!” he griped.

Oak ignored him for picking up the jar and opening it again to take a deep sniff.  A moment later they could hear purring.  

“Missy might not be gettin’ that one back,” Mutt chuckled as he took his turn digging in the bag for a product.  They continued like this.  Taking turns picking a product, reading and looking it up, sniffing, and eventually sorting them into piles at Papyrus’s insistence.  They had started with two: YES and NO.  But the YES pile was now organized by scent.  The “tastier”--as Oak put it--scented products had been more or less hoarded by said skeleton.  It was obvious what his vote was for.

“is it really smart ta have her smellin’ all yummy and shit,” Red had scooted to the far side of the couch away from Oak.  It was too much being next to the giant while he was purring with the volume of a freight train. He swears the cushions were vibrating.  Willow’s sockets narrowed on the smaller skeleton, “I HOPE YOU ARE NOT INSINUATING WHAT I THINK YOU ARE.”  His still crooked teeth pulled into a frown.  His braces were slow to fix them.  

“THAT WAS VERY UNCOUTH, RED,” Papyrus agreed and Willow sent his duplicate an appreciative smile.  

Mutt shrugged as he watched Blue repacking the NO pile, “‘m fine wit her smellin’ like a snack~”  His gold fangs glinted as he smiled, a teasing lilt to his voice.  “‘sides it’s hard not to considerin’ half this stuff has some sort of ‘butter’ in it...” he muttered.  He had no clue what exactly cocoa or shea butter was or what it did, but it smelled amazing.  

Red agreed with the butter comment.  Hell, he was still trying to figure out how they got butter from something like olives, hempseed… MANGOES?  A god damned fruit… how?  Not too mention the different oils… it was like they were trying to purposely seasoning themselves.

Blue choked on a cut off laugh and Red had cracked a smile, snickering.  Willow had tilted his skull back with a far away, tired look to the ceiling, but couldn’t hide a light flush to his cheekbones.  Papyrus had slapped a hand to his forehead with an exasperated sigh.  

Coffee giggled quietly, “...I have a bit of a sweet tooth as well…”  That was an understatement.  He had the biggest sweet tooth out of all of them. A golden blush flushed his cheekbones as all attention had turned to him in mild shock that he had said something even slightly close to a double entendre.    

A barked laugh burst from Red and Mutt.  The taller of the two recovered first with a satisfied sigh, “well, now we really gotta go with Oak’s choice.”  

Red wiped a tear from his socket as he conceded with a shrug and amused huff, “fine, fine…”  Blue and Papyrus agreed since they were outvoted either way, but Willow had yet to speak.  He was staring down Red, frown still in place.  The skeleton currently under his harsh gaze began to sweat, eyelights wobbling and shrinking as he refused to make eye contact.  The trio on the floor shifted awkwardly and after a subtle glance between the two, they busied themselves with packing up the products they wouldn’t be using.  “what?!” he finally snapped, turning sharply and glaring up at the towering monster.

“ya still owe us an apology…” Oak rumbled, his bloated red eyelight focused on Red.  His brother crossed his arms over his chest and hummed in agreement.  

“seriously?” Red looked between the two in disbelief.  Neither held an expression that they were joking and Mutt was offering no support for him.  The trench coat clad skeleton instead was looking at the ceiling with the utmost concentration.  Traitor… Red tried holding out stubbornly and debated simply shortcutting away, but even he knew he had overstepped.  Maybe that therapist was worth the money.  “m’sorry…” he grumbled, scrunching up in an effort to hide further in the fluff of his hoodie.  

Oak looked to his brother to see if he approved of the apology.  It was a piss poor one even by his standards, but he knew they probably wouldn’t get much more than that right now.  Willow’s expression definitely said the apology wasn’t up to standard, but let his shoulders fall and his arms uncross.  It was enough of an acceptance for Red as the smaller skeleton sighed in relief at the tension easing in the room.  

Papyrus, Coffee, and Blue had finished packing by now and Papyrus clapped his hands, a bright smile lighting up his face.  “WITH THAT AND OUR CHOICE OF HAIR CARE PRODUCTS COMPLETED, I’D SAY WE’VE DONE GOOD!” he boasted and Blue nodded along.  Oak just hummed and purred happily; he turned his attention back to the products on his lap.  

“BUT WE’RE NOT DONE YET,” Willow interjected and confused, curious eyelights and sockets were aimed his way.  He was grateful the more prim and proper and strict of their household were not in for this particular conversation.  “YOU SEE, WE NEED TO FIGURE OUT HOW WE’RE GOING TO WASH HER HAIR…. OR RATHER, WHERE?” he continued on to explain that they had already scratched off the upstairs bathroom she was using, plus pretty much any other bathroom at that.  “ACCORDING TO HER, THE KITCHEN OR UTILITY SINK IS BEST FOR WHEN SOMEONE HAS TO ASSIST,” he finished.

Pensive, thoughtful looks adorned most of the occupants, except for Oak and Mutt.  Oak was distracted by his hoard and Mutt was still staring at the ceiling.

“USING THE UTILITY SINK WOULD APPEASE CERTAIN SOMEONES,” Blue noted, but he didn’t sound certain.

“it would, but knowin’ how many of you are gonna wanna hang around, it’ll get crowded real quick in that little room,” Red inputted and shot down the utility sink idea.  While his brother or Black might get huffy about the kitchen sink, it wouldn’t be anything worse than some harsh words.  Black was soft on the woman and his brother held a torch for her.  They’d be fine.  

Tipping could be heard and they half expected it to be Blue typing on his phone again, but instead it was Coffee.  A few more clicks and they could see the light of the screen shining off his pearly face and gold braces.  Blue leaned to peek over his shoulder and Papyrus followed suit.  The two sharing looks of awe and understanding.  

“ey!” Red snapped and two of the trio jerked their attention from the screen, “don’t just keep it ta yaself.  show us what ya found!”

Coffee was the only one still looking at his screen and he swiped his finger across the glass surface before turning his phone around for them to see.  On the screen was a video of a woman that had curly hair and skin like their friend.  She was leaning over a sink with a woman standing just beside her.  The other woman had short, dark coils and her skin was a deep, cool brown.  She was currently using the pull down sprayer to wet the other’s hair  and working the water into her curls with her other hand.  

“OH, WE HAVE A SPRAYER LIKE THAT!” Willow nodded, “IT WILL MAKE THIS SO MUCH EASIER THAN USING A CUP OR BOWL TO DUMP WATER OVER HER HEAD.”

“you were plannin’ ta waterboard doll?” Red joked as he continued to watch the video.  “only problem ya have left is that our kitchen sink is built fer the taller than average…” he pointed out.  It sparked new ideas to be put forth.  Suggestions that they could use a chair or stool for her to stand on.  This was shot down as Coffee reminded them that she was physically exhausted and her neck and back wouldn’t appreciate being bent over for so long after the workout Edge and Papyrus had put her through.

Papyrus sighed, “IT SEEMS MY ENTHUSIASM YESTERDAY HAS PRODUCED YET ANOTHER PROBLEM…”  

Blue patted his shoulder comfortingly,  “WE HAD NO CLUE ANY OF THIS WOULD HAPPEN.  PLUS, THINK HOW PROUD SHE’LL BE WHEN YOU SHOW HER THE CHARTS OF HER PROGRESS YOU MADE!”  It helped cheer up the positive skeleton and he nodded, mumbling a thank you to his ever supportive friend.

A deep rumble pervaded the living room and gradually morphed into amused, pleased chuckles.  All attention moved to Mutt, the source, with inquiring gazes.  Pushing his hood down and leaning forward, resting his elbow on his knee and his cheek against his knuckles, he grinned at his companions, “...think I have a solution fer that~”

[evak-fic-rec-turtleanon]

Evak Fics - Christmas 2017

Christmas fics posted for 2017

*** Non-English Fics *** Under 20k fics (Smutty, Angsty, Fluffy)  *** Over 20k fics

***** NON-ENGLISH FICS ***** 

Deilig er jorden by pagnilagni (Norsk, 3k words) - Et lite bakteppe: Tida etter at Maria og Fredrik ble født høsten 2029 ble ikke som Even og Isak hadde tenkt. Ungene sov ikke, fedrene sov ikke, Even ble deprimert, Isak måtte ta seg av hele familien. Nå er det snart jul... 

det kommer att regna på fredag, den tjugoandra december by vesperthine (Svenska, 4k words) - Isak har försökt säga att det inte är något att prata om ( – att mamma är dålig och pappa är feg, att han bara vill glömma allt vad förväntad familjelycka betyder och snylta på deras – ) men varje gång har Even bara tystnat och tittat ned; sett så sorgsen ut att konversationen helt har stannat av. Vilket han vet är en dödsstöt ( – en kommunikativ härdsmälta – ) som leder till allt det som han velat undvika; skrik och bråk som påminner för mycket om allting som han vill glömma.

En fantastisk julaften by pagnilagni (Norsk, 4k words) - God jul fra Maria og Fredrik og resten av familien Evak anno 2035 

I midvintertid by champagneleftie (Svenska, 8k words) - En saga om en Even, en Isak, och en magisk snöglob. 

En helt vanlig enkel dag by Always_and_ever (Svenska, 18k words) - Detta skulle bli den första dag, på länge, då han skulle känna sig ok. En dag spenderad med goda vänner på julmarknad. Han hade planerat och längtat. En helt vanlig enkel dag. Ja det var vad han föreställt sig i alla fall. Eller en historia om flera enkla dagar som inte blir så enkla som Isak hade hoppats på. ELLER en historia om att finna sin väg tillbaka. 

den mørkeste tida by pagnilagni (Norsk, 45k words) - Vi er i 2025. Isak har jobbet på Svalbard det siste halvåret. Han holder på med doktorgraden sin i astrofysikk og jobber som forsker i Ny Ålesund. Even jobber med en filminnspilling og har reist mye de siste månedene. Nå skal de feire jul sammen på Svalbard. 

Isak og Even -en julekalender by evakyaki, Frieda Echte (Plommesill), pagnilagni (Norsk, 55k words) - En Evak-fanfic-julekalender, fra oss til dere! God advent! Dette er en spesialskrevet desemberfic der vi følger Isak og Even dag for dag fram til julaften, desember 2017. Hver dag fram til jul poster vi et nytt kapittel her. 

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***** UNDER 20K FICS *****

SMUTTY

O Helga Natt by u_d (3k words) - It's Christmas Day. Isak and Even are far from holy.

santa, baby by empty_venom (SERIES, 14 fics) - Most of these are smutty fics but not all. 

Mistletoe and Type O Negative by riyku (6k words) - Isak Valtersen: vampire hunter. Kinda has a nice ring to it. 

Where the Lovelight Gleams by Sabeley (8k words) - The one where Even and Isak are stuck at different Christmas parties, but they're determined to have sex anyway. 

Uncover Me by Maugurt (13k words) - Now, Isak’s had his fair share of moments that could possibly be considered kind of gay, but those moments could always be regarded as curiosity or something else not homosexual. But straight up making out with some guy at a party couldn’t. There was just no way he could no homo out of that one. It was very homo. 

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NOT ALL FLUFF / ANGSTY

Love Actually by evak1isak (684 words) - Isak is engaged to his high school boyfriend, Chris, until things change when Even, his high school friend, shows up one day at Christmas, with an important message to tell through some posters while "Silent Night" plays in the background.

Blue Nights by Evak2121 (1k words) - "Still, he missed him more than he thought he could on a Christmas Eve." 

I'm not an asshole? by rumpelsnorcack (2k words) - Not Chrismassy. Jonas takes a few moments for himself to consider his reactions to his best friend being gay. It occurs to him that he maybe hasn't been the most supportive friend in the past. 

I'll be there, baby by Wolle19 (3k words) - All Isak want is for his husband to be home for the holidays. Even works making documentaries, so being home for the important dates is not a easy task. Isak just want a miracle. 

Oltre i confini del blu by Stria (Asia117) (3k words) - Five times Isak's Christmas is completely ruined and one time it goes completely right. 

it's going to rain on friday, the twenty-second of december by vesperthine (4k words) - Isak has tried to tell him that there’s nothing to discuss ( – that mom isn’t well, that dad is a coward, that he just wants to forget everything about family and expected happiness and just leech off of theirs – ) but every time Even has gone quiet and looked down; looked so sad that the conversation has just died. 

Soul Mates by orphan_account (5k words) - A misunderstanding before Christmas leads to a bit of angst and a whole lot of hurt/comfort. Then lots and lots of Christmas fluff!!! 

The Disaster Christmas by tusktooth (6k words) - It's now Isak's turn to meet Even's extended family over the week of Christmas.

my heart held a ledger by cynical_optimist, strangetowns (8.6k words) - A hitmen AU, wherein Isak and Even hate their jobs but love each other. 

i wrote you a song, hope that you sing along, and it goes: by traumatic (10k words) - Like a lot of seven year old boys, Even dreams of catching Santa Claus. He dreams of meeting him and shaking his hand, of asking him to show him how he does it, of thanking him for all he's done. When he actually does, Santa is exactly like he'd imagined. Both fortunately and unfortunately, by the time of Even's 23rd birthday, Santa no longer looks like that. He's no longer old or jolly; he doesn't have a large round belly or half-moon spectacles. This Santa is young, lean, and as beautiful as the world itself. 

tell me it's a good start by teatrolley (12k words) - A sequel. Even's POV of It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, before during and beyond. And a New Year's Eve. 

It's a Wonderful Life by kapplebougher (13k words) - t's a Wonderful Life AU, where Even believes the world would be better off without his existence. With the help of an angel though, he comes to realize that just maybe - that may not be entirely true. 

Life is better with you by charlyflowers (16k words) - A oneshot of Isak and Even during several Christmas times together. Childhood friends. 

I Just Want You For My Own by Twinklylightseverywhere (19k words) - Even loves the holidays, really. He loves spending time with his friends and family, drinking hot chocolate by the fire, exchanging gifts, the like. He loves leaving his apartment to see snow falling from the sky, children’s eyes lit up in excitement, and the general busy bustle of downtown Oslo in December. You know what he doesn’t love about Christmas time? Working in a fucking Post Office. 

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FLUFFY 

the way your eyes sparkle by wyoheartsmusic (501 words) - Isak and Even celebrate Christmas apart and neither of them is very happy about it 

Under the Mistletoe by evak1isak (952 words) - Isak has a crush on Eva's best friend, Even, but he's too stubborn to recognize it. With Christmas coming, Eva has a plan to set the two boys up. 

dance with me by agarina (1k words) - There's always some room for anxiety. And cheesy Christmas music. And dancing. And kisses. 

all i want for christmas is you by stringsinmelody (1k words) - Isak and Even enjoy their first Christmas together with their baby. 

Slowly Starts Sinking In by bri_ness (1.4k words) - Christmas ish. After a Christmas party, Isak and Eva consider their feelings for their friends. 

all the greenery is comin' down by colazitron (1.5k words) - Evilde fic. Vilde decides to try and make a move on Eva, and the mistletoe at the Kosegruppa Christmas Party would be the perfect pretext. If only she could actually get Eva underneath it! 

Christmas Surprises by glbertblythes (1.5k words) - Isak and Even celebrate Christmas together by going to Even's house for dinner. 

You And Me Here by TotallyTinkerbell (1.7k words) - A little Christmas-themed Evak fluff 

I'm FALLing for you by Schedazzle (2k words) - Not actually a Christmas fic but it’s too cute not to include. … the little bell above the door went off and his favorite customer came in. Even couldn’t hide the smile spreading on his face as he spotted the by now familiar golden curls. 

from such great heights by lizziemcguire (2k words) - Isak finds himself scared on a Ferris Wheel, and it's all Magnus' fault. Even is there to comfort him. 

White Elephant by HazyCosmicJive (2k words) - Vilde turns the office Secret Santa into a White Elephant Secret Santa. 

everyone hates christmas music by theyellowcurtains (2k words) - The boys plan a trip to a cabin for Christmas and a group Secret Santa. 

Hope by bri_ness (2.4k words) - Isak and Even celebrate hope. 

The Beginning of Believing by MacksDramaticShenanigans (2.5k words) - “Santa’s not even real,” Aleksander shouted, his voice so loud that it echoed down the hallway.“Yes he is! He brings us presents!” Elin whined, her bottom lip pushed out into an over exaggerated pout— something she had clearly picked up from Even. Aleksander scoffed and shook his head, blonde curls bouncing. “No! Daddy and Pappa bring us presents!” Elin’s eyes grew as wide as saucers, and a thin film of moisture clouded her pretty green irises. “No, Santa!” She argued. 

i can't pretend (guess that's love) by wyoheartsmusic (2.5k words) - Even is tired of watching his friends kiss. So is Isak. The plan? Add more kissing to the mix to get them to stop kissing.Foolproof. Right? 

Not so much of a Christmas miracle by Sassy3 (2.5k words) - Isak is trying to earn some money selling Christmas trees. He isn´t doing that well but suddenly the customers only ask for him, who is helping him out? 

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas by colazitron (2.5k words) - Even knows Isak's a bit nervous about visiting his mother for Christmas, so he tries to lighten the mood with a joke. 

but cause he really knows me by ourlovelybones (3k words) - Even just wants to plan a perfect surprise for Isak, one where it doesn't go quite as planned and one where he thinks he might have gotten it just right. 

But the prettiest sight to see by imminentinertia (3k words) - Even deeply regrets doing Eva a favour for Christmas, but it turns out there’s a reward for his kindness. 

You Forgot Cranberries Too? by ultimatelawrence (3k words) - "Isak was a romantic deep down in his heart. A fact he never let anyone know. But a fact that was there and seemed to be exacerbated by the festive season."4 Christmas Eve's in which Isak sees Even. 4 Christmas Eve's to get it right. 

Bundle Up Tight! Flurries Tonight by MacksDramaticShenanigans (3.4k words) - Isak obliged and snatched up the first coat of his that his eyes landed on. It was more of a windbreaker than it was a real jacket, and Even quickly pointed that out. “If you wear that you're going to freeze, Is.” “It’s not that cold out, Even. Anyways we’re just walking to the tram stop, we’re not going to be outside very long.” 

Ready to Jingle Your Bells by MacksDramaticShenanigans (3.5k words) - It was truly a testament to how drunk Isak was when rather than vehemently denying the request or furiously shaking his head and pushing everyone away, he set his glass down and determinately rose to his feet. And there was also the fact that Isak— sober or drunk— was never one to turn away from any sort of challenge, and Mikael’s wording certainly posed this as one. (Of course, there was also the fact that Even did sing him a song, and what kind of a boyfriend would he be if he didn’t serenade Even right back?) 

The best Christmas you've ever had by hannakin (3.7k words) - “I don’t hate Christmas,” Isak sighed. “I just don’t like it.” Isak doesn't really like Christmas but Even does and he wants Isak to do too. “I’m going to make this Christmas the best Christmas you have ever had.” he whispered. 

fucking finally by theyellowcurtains (4k words) - It was nearing Christmas and Isak had to do something. He really wanted Even to be in his life forever now. 

Tis’ The Season To Be Grumpy by MacksDramaticShenanigans (4k words) - “Jeez,” Even started, giving Isak a pointed look. “Are you supposed to be using that kind of language around children?” He asked, though he didn’t sound mad— more amused than anything, really. Isak scrunched up his face at that. “What would Santa have to say about this?” 

It's Lovely Weather for a Sleigh Ride Together with You by princeofnothingcharming (4k words) - It had been snowing all day in Oslo and as Christmas was drawing near they had been playing Christmas music in KB, putting Even in such a cosy and festive mood and he’d decided he didn’t want to lose this festive feeling and wanted to something fun and festive with Isak and knew exactly what he wanted to do. 

A Grump for Christmas by Schedazzle (4k words) - Apparently he wasn't as great at hiding his emotions, because as he hastily wiped the table someone behind him said, “Why do you always frown when that one comes on?” Isak looked over his shoulder to where that deep voice had come from. Even. There was a fluttering in his stomach every time his coworker unexpectedly starting talking to him.He rolled his eyes. “It means the CD starts back up again.” Even who had been smiling at him grinned at that and chuckled. “You’re a Grinch.” Fake dating au. 

Books by Aceteroid (4k words) - Even picks up a pre-ordered book for his mother and falls for the employee at the store. 

Just Kids When We Fell In Love by wyoheartsmusic (5k words) - Isak and Even go to university 3000 km away from each other. Luckily, it's Christmas break and they had the brilliant idea to go on a cabin trip together. 

Maybe what matters is being together by evakuality (5k words) - It's Isak's first ever anniversary and he can't imagine anything worse than being forced to spend it with his co-workers. Of course, when your anniversary happens to be around Christmas time, sometimes dates collide. 

He Moves Me by warlocked_mundane (5k words) - A huge smile lights up Isak’s face and there is no trace of sleep to be found anymore. He bites his lower lip to contain the giggle that wants to escape. Even talking about their future like there is no way but for them to spend the rest of their lives together and build a family of their own, makes him giddy with so much joy. He’s never felt so happy in his life before. 

All The Way Home I'll Be Warm by Alene (6k words) - Eva finds her way back to Jonas, but more importantly she finds her way back to herself. Isak just happens to find Even in the process. Also, it's almost Christmas, and they're snowed in. 

(WIP) The Fools Who Dream by Janey_E (6k words) - A collection of moments from Isak and Even's family life, important and not-so-important. Kids, friends, mornings, evenings, weddings, birthdays, bad days, good days. 

18 Secret Santa Horror Stories That'll Turn Anyone Into A Grinch by GayaIsANerd (6k words) - Some secret Santa, some unfortunate google results, a whole lot of complaining and a heart full of gratitude. 

(Baby) It's Cold Outside by himmelsky (6k words) - December is approaching, but Isak isn’t feeling the Christmas spirit. Barista guy, aka Even, wants it differently. 

Cuddle Monsters by sikily (8k words) - One spoke of true love and the other a critic, But Christmas would be the day to believe in magic, A wink of his eye and a tilt of his head, And Isak became a believer instead. 

Make the Yuletide Gay by Sabeley (8.4k words) - Isak has been pining after Even for months. Jonas and Eva decide that a romantic getaway at the cabin is exactly what the two boys need to confess their feelings to each other.  

helpful magic by everythingislove (straykid), puddingandpie (9k words) - Five times Even uses his magic because of Isak, and the one time he actually tells him about it. Or: the one where Even is a Santa’s Helper with special Christmas magic abilities, and Isak is a normal human who he's quickly falling for. 

7 Places I Fell in Love With You by princeofnothingcharming, Victory4 (11k words) - Isak has a unique gift for Even this Christmas. In the form of letters 

SKAM ADVENT CALENDAR by salengedusmiler (SilverySparks) (14k words) - Watch your favourite Skam characters open their advent calendars together with their friends. 24 days of more or less Christmassy friendship and couple fluff!

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***** OVER 20K FICS ***** 

Just give me a reason, just a little bit’s enough by Amfelia (21k words) - Not sure if this is Christmas centric. Even discovers life is not always shiny and bright, sometimes it is just really hard. Angsty. 

In A Week by allyasavedtheday (23k words) - Not a Christmas fic. But this sequel is a fav. “Fine. I’ll stay at Eskild’s on Friday night. And you can add your 1000kr to our wedding present,” he sniffs. “Or,” Jonas says and Isak doesn’t trust the glint in his eye. “We could make this a little more interesting. ”Isak narrows his eyes at him. “What are your terms?” “You and Even spend the five nights up to Saturday apart. If you do, we’ll pay for your honeymoon.” 

Late December With My Heart In My Chest by LavenderWater (24k words) - In order to stop his mother's fussing since he left for college, Even tells her he's dating his roomate, Isak. They pretend to be a couple over the holiday weekend to convince his family.

The Secret Santa App by Crazyheart (25k words) - Secret Santa AU, Isak’s and Even’s altering POV. In this world, Isak and Even met at Nissen, but they were never brave enough to do anything. Isak (25) is a stressed-out salesman for playground equipment. Even (27) is a freshly educated, burned out and lonely children’s psychologist. They meet again when Sana, Eva and Vilde arrange a Secret Santa party. Without knowing it, Isak and Even end up as Secret Santas for each other and they chat with each other on the Secret Santa App. 

My Very Personal Ski Trainer by Crazyheart (28k words) - This is before Christmas 2016. Even never transferred to Nissen, so he’s doing his last year at Bakka. He has just broken up with Sonja and is recovering from a manic and depressive episode. Sana has invited Even and her other friends to a Holiday cabin trip, and Even needs to get in shape so that he can beat his buddies in Sana’s planned ski race. He tries out a personal ski trainer app and meets the hot ski trainer Isak Valtersen. Even struggles to focus only on the training. On the cabin trip, when Even arrives early, a surprise guest turns up and a snowstorm threatens to snow them both in. Who knows what happens next? 

Under the mistletoe by mazarin01 (30k words) - Isak (23) and Even (24) have been best friends since junior high. The holiday is upon them. Isak hates Christmas, having lots of bad memories attached to the holiday. Even on the other hand loves Christmas, but because of an appendix removal and a closed off mountain pass, he never gets home for Christmas. Being the best friend Isak is, he invites Even to celebrate Christmas with him. Circumstances have them kiss under a mistletoe and neither of them expected the kiss to feel that good... 

(I’ll give it to) Someone Special by nofeartina (31k words) - The one where Isak is oblivious to Even’s true feelings about him, but fortunately it only takes the Christmas holidays to change that. Childhood friends. Fake dating. 

A Thrill of Hope by mlbee (35k words) - “Yes,” Even breathed before pulling Isak in for another kiss. He pulled away and murmured, “This is so weird. I’m kissing a total stranger.” “Really?” Isak asked. “I do it all the time.” The Holiday AU 

Five Dollars by folerdetdufoler (36k words) - You know that one book that changes your life? It just landed in Isak Valtersen's inbox. 

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas by teatrolley (49k words) - So, here’s the thing: Isak moves out of his parent’s house when he’s sixteen and it’s fine, really, most of the time it’s fine. It’s just Decembers. Goddamn Decembers. They’re not exactly his favourite time of the year.This time, though: this time he think there’s someone who has it worse than he does.On the first of December that year, Even moves in. 

Around the Corner (My Very Personal Christmas Shopper) by Crazyheart (51k words) - Isak (22) works in a record shop for Jonas. Isak’s best colleague and friend is Eva, who works in the shop, too. Isak is still in the closet. He says things as he thinks, though. Doesn't like snowglobes. Even (24) comes and asks for a job. The two get off on the wrong foot, although Isak finds Even irritatingly attractive. To complicate things, Isak has just gotten a personal Christmas gift shopper, who turns out to be a very romantic gift shopper, and who doesn't shy away from a little flirting. Holiday movie AU. 

In this bed of snowflakes we lie by MermaidsandMermen (58k words) - Follow Isak and Even in this University Dorm life AU, full of snowflakes, fluffy pillows, and people who are nothing like they seem on the outside. Because people keep secrets. Pretend to be people they are not. And secrets will wear you down if you don't let them out to air once in a while. 

that’s all i really know by cammm (95k words) - Not exclusively a christmas fic. Even and Isak have been dating for a while now. They met at a young age and sort of grew up together. Even lives and goes to school a few hours away from Nissen, so there’s a lot of commuting for Isak to see his boyfriend. But what happens when Even says he moving? And then he shows up at Nissen a few weeks later, to start school?Only thing... Isak isn’t out, yet. And Even wasn’t ever told that his boyfriend was still in the closet. 

717 Miles by MermaidsandMermen (114k words) - The epilogue is the Christmas heavy chapter. Even Bech Naesheim should not be here. Well it was not his plan to be here. Not at all. Even Bech Naesheim, age 19, is supposed to be on a beach in Bali. He is supposed to be on the first stop on his Asian backpacking trip of a lifetime. THAT was the plan. That is where he is supposed to be. Not here. Alone in a house in fucking London. Being paid to look after some troubled 17-year-old. Isak Valtersen has 3 weeks left of school. He has to survive 3 more weeks. Make it through 21 more days of hell. Then he is going to hide out in his room for the rest of the summer until he can figure out how to get his life back on track. Find a school far far away where he can start over. Not make mistakes. He doesn't need a fucking babysitter. He just doesn't. His life is fucked up enough as it is. 

(WIP) You Are Not Alone by TotallyTinkerbell (130k words) - What happened after Isak told us that 'life is now'. 

Family Ties by sadgrlsclub (215k words) - Set between Season 3 and 4. Even gets invited to his first Valtersen family event, and discovers things about Isak's past and his relationship with his parents. The story of how Even and Isak get to know each other's families and deepen their bond along the way. 

[lyz-fics]

Hinata Shintani X FEM! Reader X Takumi Usui: Lemon Tarts

Hey Guys! Lyz Here!

Ok, so… this started out really nice but the longer I put it off the crappier it got. This is a really shitty story and I am dissapointed. This took me so long to write an I am so sincerely sorry for how long I put it off. 

Words: 3,242 Words

Warning: NSFW - Semi-Public Sex, Fighting, Threesome, 

Summary: After bumping into Hinata in the hallway and spilling all the cakes you had prepared for the school’s sports festival he offers to make more for with you. Then finding Takumi in the kitchen cooking as well the boys decide to test your limits of how much lemon you can handle in your sweet and sour tart.

—===✨🎇🎆💀🎆🎇✨===— 

Carefully…

Extremely carefully, you balanced the trays of tarts on your forearms as you walked down the empty hallways. The break for lunch was almost over so you had time to relax before you had to even start making the tarts. But being the overachiever you are, you served up the food extremely fast and started baking the tarts straight after you had finished. Turning the corner slowly you were almost bulldozed over when someone ran into you. you stumbled back and fell down onto the floor, you were fine apart for some minor bruises that would most likely appear later on but the tarts – CRAP the tarts!

“oh my gosh, (Y/N)-kun,” a boy stuttered. You recognized that voice, a soft voice, something that was so sweet – Hinata. “I didn’t see you coming around the corner, ah- I'm so sorry.”

“No, no, please, Hinata,” you pleaded with him, “I’m fine, but… my tarts”

You whispered the last part as you pushed your head into your hands in defeat. Hinata took his eyes off of you and turned his attention to the trays of food that lay beside you, incircled by small tarts. He gasped softly as he watched you tilt your head downwards. Suddenly his face lit up with joy.

“You’re an amazing cook (Y/N)” he smiled excitedly, “if we work together I'm sure we can have twice the amount of tarts in no time if you let me help.”

You looked up at him finally, seeing the smile across his face, how could you say no. His soft brown eyes glistened as the light echoed through the hallway. He extended his hand and you took it willingly, wrapping his other hand around your arm he pulled you up from the ground. He walked over to the cleaning closet without a word and brought out a mop and bucket, and a broom.

He passed you the broom with a soft grin, “If you can sweep them into a pile I can mop up the mess behind you.”

You both took your time in cleaning the hallway, but still, you were done in no time. Hinata offered to put all the cleaning supplies away so you could head straight towards the kitchen and waste no time in baking the new tarts. Walking into the kitchen you could see a class cleaning up the kitchen, students already packed up and ready to head to their next class. Among them was Takumi – of course, he had to be here.

“Pardon the interruption,” you spoke up, “if you don’t mind the class being dismissed early, I need the kitchen to bake some goods for the festival.”

The teacher gave you a smile and a nod as she finished wiping her hands on a towel and gave the class a wave to dismiss them. Hinata walks in with the trays and smiles at you.

“Hinata I'm going to have to ask you-” the teacher started but you jumped in before she could finish her sentence.

“Oh, don’t worry miss, he isn't here to eat the students' food,” you giggled as remembered what he tends to be like, “he is here to help me bake.”

The teacher flashed you a shocked expression. You could just imagine what she would be thining – Hinata? Helping bake instead of just devouring everything that lay in his wake? Impossible! Giving the teacher another smile you walked over to one of the benches and started scrolling down your phone, through your notes trying to look for the recipe you had saved that you used for the last batch of tarts. Finally finding it you showed Hinata the picture of what you would be making, his stomach grumbled as you showed it to him and you both laughed.

“well,” a tall blonde boy said aloud as he started to approach you both, “with only one person baking and the other person eating every second batch that comes out of the oven, it sounds as if you could use an extra hand to double the production rate.”

“well,” you scoffed, “if it isn’t the master chef himself. Come to join our baking competition?”

“Well, in fact,” he said snootily, “I have come to teach you.” he slammed his hand onto the counter in front of you sending Hinata backward, but knowing Takumi’s shenanigans you stayed put. He leaned close to you and tilted his head to the side as he whispered something in your ear. “It looks like you would need some help after all,” backing away he nodded over towards Hinata who had fallen backward, catching a drawer on the way down he had dropped wooden utensils all over himself.

You rolled your eyes as you turned around on your heels quickly to help Hinata pick up all the utensils and put them back in the drawer, and place the drawer back where it originally came from. Helping him off the floor you turned to Takumi once more.

“Teach? Not likely! Help? Definitely!” you scoffed as you watched Takumi walk around to the other side of the bench and stand next to Hinata. “You boys will be working on the crusts of the lemon tarts. We will need more crust than curd so its good there is too of you. while you two do that I will work on the curd.”

Texting Takumi the recipe saved on your phone you walked off and into the cupboard to gather your ingredients. The boys stared at each other for a while before getting out the things they needed as well. Walking back you say Hinata gave Takumi a low throated growl as he walked over to your bench. He set his ingredients down and stared at your phone wondering what to do next.

He started mixing the dry ingredients into a large bowl, doubling the recipe as he went. Finally realizing what he was doing you cleared your throat softly.

“Takumi you're meant to share the bench with Hinata,” you said softly. He tried to protest but you would keep insisting that he should work with Hinata because they were making the same part of the tart.

Finally getting him to move back to help Hinata you watched as Hinata flicked his head back and forth from his phone and his bowl where he was mixing some ingredients.

“Is there something you need, Hinata?”

“Uhh… maybe?” he stuttered, “Mine doesn’t look like the reference picture you have here.”

“Have you added the eggs and water yet?” you asked as you walked over to his side of the counter to have a look at his bowl to see if you could help him at all.

“No, I'm still up to the dry ingredients,” he answered more confidently. It gave you some reassurance that he at least knew what step he was up to.

Having a look in his bowl you too could see that there was something wrong. Sifting your hand through the mixture you finally figured it out.

“Butter,” you said triumphantly.

“What?” Hinata asked. At first, he didn’t understand what you had said but then he got it. Letting out a slow sigh he walked over to the large pantry in the kitchen to look for the butter mentioned in the recipe.

“(Y/N)-Kun,” Hinata called from inside the pantry. His head poked out from around the corner when you answered his call with a loud sigh. “I uhhh – I can't seem to find the proper butter you were talking about.”

You shook your hands off over the sink and wiped the remaining residue onto your skirt as you walked over to the pantry to help Hinata. You walked over to the pantry and found that he had made a mess of one of the boxes on the floor. Some of the cans had rolled behind the door so as you walked in you shut it behind you and started picking up the cans. Hinata walked up behind you and rested his chin on your shoulder as he pinned you forward facing into the corner.

“Hinata,” you stuttered as you said his name. he wasn’t usually like this with you.

“(N/N)-Chan,” Hinata sighed as he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer you were pressed up against his chest. “Will you compare me to Takumi? What am I to you when you compare me to him?”

“ah?” you gasped. How could you answer that question? Has he been comparing himself to Takumi this whole time? Have they been comparing themselves with each other?

Softly, you felt his hands release from around your waist, he stepped back away from you. without even knowing what you were doing you span around and grabbed his hand.

“Hinata-Chan,” you said softly, your (E/C) orbs staring into his deep brown ones. “I will never compare you to Takumi.” With that’s sentence he pulled his hand out if your and started walking back again. Rushing forward again, you grabbed both of his hands this time before continuing what you were going to say to him. “I don’t compare the both of you because you are both different people to me. You don’t deserve to be looked at like you are the same as him, because you're not.”

Hinata rushed towards you right as you finished your sentence, pushing you against the wall. One hand at the side of your head and the other cupped at your cheek, you leaned into his hand as he brought his face closer and closer to yours. Looking u into his eyes once more before closing them as both of your lips touched.

His lips were warm and soft, not what you might have expected from him ut none-the-less you couldn’t help but fall deeper under his spell. As your lips parted you got a small taste of something sweet, he must've had a bit of one of the tarts – that scoundrel. Pressed up against the corner you had nowhere else to go but into his embrace. You stepped forward as you placed your hands on his chest.

Suddenly you heard a loud slam, like someone ramming into a wall, right next to your head. Huddling close to Hinata as you two broke apart you could see a shadowy figure looming in the doorframe of the pantry. Stepping closer to the both of you, the light shone on the green-eyed boy that stood in front of you both.

He lurched forward just as Hinata was pushing you back behind him. He grabbed your wrist harshly as he pulled you forward towards him instead of the other boy. Pushing you outside of the pantry he stepped back in and pushed the other boy to the ground. Walking back he snapped his head to look at the boy that was lying on the floor.  Grabbing the door handle with force he pulled it straight out of its socket and he shut the door as he exited, locking the boy in the pantry t watch as he stormed closer to you.

Pushing you back towards the counter he slammed both of his hand either side of you. you kept your hands behind you as he forced his lips onto yours. Grabbing your waist suddenly he picked you up and placed you on top of the bench. You leaned back to escape him but he pushed himself forward. Quickly captured under his spell, you placed your hands on him as you started to lean forward again. He grabbed your hands and pulled them to place them behind his head. Pulling apart for a breathe you finally realized what you had gotten yourself into.

You squirmed on the bench and used your legs to kick him away. Rolling off the other side of the bench and landing on your feet you kept your head down as walked back over to the pantry where Hinata was trapped. Tears rolled down your cheeks as Hinata tried to reach for your hand to hold. You pulled away and burst out in anger.

“Get out!” you screamed at them both, “Get out my sight.”

Watching them both walk out of the door you rushed to close and lock it behind them. You placed your head against the door and lets the tears roll down your cheeks like a raging river. Falling to the floor, you cried into your hands.

What were these boys doing to you? why were they doing this to you? was this some game to them? Are you just some object they want to acquire? What are these boys going to do to each other if they don’t get you?

♥     ♥     ♥     ♥     ♥

Finally taking the tarts out of the oven, you sighed as you placed the last batch onto the counter. Putting them all in a box to take outside to the festival, you used your back to push the door open and started walking down the hallways once more to the track where you would set up your stall of sweets for the winning runners. You placed the tray of cakes down at your stall and started setting them up on the platters.

The gun fired and the first racers were off, like a flash the 100-yard dash was done. The racers puffed their way towards your stall with their discount prices for winning. The racers cleared away after paying for the tarts and Takumi walked up to your stall. You stepped back as he stepped forward. Holding up his first place ribbon he took a tart and walked around to the back of your stall.

Waiting for the other racers to get their treats you walked behind your stall to find Takumi leaning against the back of the wall, licking his fingers clean from the tart. You rolled your eyes as you turned back around to walk into your stall. You walked for a bit but you suddenly felt your hand being grabbed by someone – but you knew exactly who that someone was. You pulled your hand hard this time, you really didn’t want anyone touching you, like that ever again. You turned around to yell but you were met with a pair of the most sultry brown eyes. You choked for words as you stepped closer to the tall brunette boy in front of you.

He placed his head against your shoulder and you jumped as you heard his breath hitch as if it sounded like he was starting to cry. “(Y/N), please forgive me, I was horrible to you and I understand if you hate e but I really still want to try and get along with you.”

You pulled your hand up to stroke his hair and you gently pushed his off of you, listening to his whine as he felt the absence of your warmth. “I really like you both but I don’t want to hurt either of you by choosing the other and I definitely don’t want you to use me like you did to get the other’s attention.” You got mad at them as you remembered what had happened in the kitchen previously.

“What if we told you,” Takumi was now getting up from where he was leaning against the stall and he walked over to you as he picked up your hand and planted a soft kiss over the top of your knuckles. “You don’t have to choose because we can learn to share you.”

But how? How could two men share you? you were taken aback by this information and you quickly started to retreat back to the stall, but they kept pulling against you. your head snapped as you started to hear chatter at the front of your stall. Crap, another race had finished and you didn’t even hear the gun goto signal the start. Takumi walked up to you and leaned down to whisper in your ear.

“Think about it.”

With that, he walked off and went to go sit down next to his gym bag. Hinata walked away and followed his and you watched as he sat next to him and seemed to start to strike up a conversation. Quickly you came back to your senses, running around to the other side of the tent you greeted the winning racers.

“Sorry about that,” you smiled, “Thought I heard the other tarts fall off of something. Do you need help with anything?”

♥     ♥     ♥     ♥     ♥

It was the end of the day now, the sports carnival was finished and you were walking out of the gates as you noticed two boys sitting and waiting at the gates for you. you stopped in your tracks as you just started at the blonde boy, propped up against the wall, bag flung over his shoulder, smiling at you as he batted his emerald green orbs at you. You watch the boy that was sitting below him, cross-legged, take his attention away from the birds in front of him and direct his gaze to where Takumi was waving. He ran up to you, greeting you with his signature smile as he tightly shut his deep brown eyes and opened them again to see the blush adorning your face.

“Did you think about what we said?” Takumi said as he walked over to you both holding the bag that Hinata had forgotten on the ground. “We’re open to suggestions,” he added at the end.

“If you two can learn to get along I can think about it,” you hesitated but finally got the last part out by making sure not to look either one of them directly in the eye. “And make sure never use me like that again……unless I say so….”

“What was that last part?” Takumi cocked as he placed his hand on your head, messing up your perfectly styled (H/C) hair and squishing you down. You reached your hand up and waved him away before wrapping both of your arms around Hinata's forearm and dragging him off.

“I said I like Hinata more,” you yelled behind you as you ran fro the boy.

“I thought we were going to share?” Hinata asked coyly, he really had no clue.

“You can share me if you can catch me,” you yelled as you dropped your bag and started running. You knew one of the boys would pick it up and it would be lighter anyway to run without your bag.

And of course, Hinata picked up your bag and started to chase after you, Takumi close behind him. After a few blocks, you finally got tired and started to slow down but you could see the boys behind you anywhere. Maybe they gave up? They better not have, one of them has your school bag. Turning around to look for them you leaped higher than you thought you could as they jumped out from behind a street corner and tackled you to the ground playfully. Hanta on one side and Takumi on the other you let out a sigh as you relaxed into each of their holds on you. Could you really get used to this? Would this even work out?

Suddenly you two pairs of soft lips on either of your cheeks. Maybe this could work after all.

“Fine,” you huffed as you wrapped your arms up and placed your hand s on each of their cheeks. Pulling yourself up to place a quick kiss against Hinata’s lips and then Takumi’s you fell back into their embrace slowly. “I guess you two can learn to share.”

[theskamlibrary]

75 dates in the Skam Universe Masterpost

Thank you so much for everyone who participated, we had a total of X dates in the Skam Universe. We are so grateful for every content creators who put such hard work and shared it with us, you are the backbone of this fandom and the ones who make it worthwhile. 

Support your content creators! Reblog their posts, give them feedback, comment, share the love.  

FIC

Cliché by @catloves3 {WTFock - Zoë Loockx/Senne De Smet - 497 words}

written for (fun)fair

Senne, Zoe, Jana, and Luka at a funfair.

*****

click by @butforwardiscalling {Skam Italy - Niccolò Fares/Martino Rametta - 1613 words }

written for shooting photos 

niccolò has a camera. martino is his preferred model, willing or not.

*****

Cheats and Prank Wars by @toobaddiane {Druck - Matteo Florenzi/David Schreibner - 2507 words}

written for prank war

It’s the summer after their first year in university started and the boys are just lazying around. After an episode of Brooklyn Nine Nine gives Jonas an idea, they engage in a harmless prank war. What could possibly go wrong when someone is super competitive and their boyfriend is their teammate?

Or Matteo and David are teammates in a prank war and David is a competitive jerk.

*****

I think I like my eyes by @ayellowcurtain {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 1026 words}

written for building a pillow fort 

*****

shut up and kiss me by @orpheuscris {Skam Espana - Cris Soto/Joana Bianchi - 3441 words}

written for study date

Joana and Cris have been at odds nearly the entire time they've been sitting next to each other in class. So that’s why it’s such a surprise when one day, near the end of the semester, Cris invites Joana over to her house to study. And why she’s even more surprised by herself when she accepts.

*****

show me the things (that you believe in) by @softdemaury {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 6329 words}

written for at home movie night

“Guess there goes your movie, then.” Lucas says while they’re sitting down at the kitchen table.

“Wait, you didn’t organize this to get out of watching that damn thing, right?” Eliott squints his eyes at Lucas, raising his fork in an attempt to look threatening.

Lucas laughs, “You think I’d do that? Of course I didn’t. We’ll just watch it next time, no big deal.”

or

5 times Eliott fails in making Lucas watch 10 Things I Hate About You and the 1 time Lucas takes the matter into his own hands

*****

Future Little Koala by @youleavebehindmemories {Skam Italy - Eva Brighi/Giovanni Garau - 2697 words }

written for wedding 

It's basically Giovanni and Eva at the wedding of Marti and Nicco with glimpses into Gio & Eva's future, domestic life! (as well as background moments from others)

*****

Feels like Love by @tunonseisolonico {Skam Italy - Niccolò Fares/Martino Rametta - 2602 words }

written for karaoke 

“Come on, Marti! Let´s go and sing a song, the two of us!”

“You for real?!” Marti immediately exclaimed, being full of doubts.

He couldn't help but got flashbacks in his head, thinking back to Silvia´s 80´s party, him sitting close to Nico on the couch, Emma on Nico´s other side. Niccolò asking them to sing a song with him, Marti already refusing to do so back then.

“Of course, I´m not joking!”

“Well, sounds like it. No, I´m not going to sing a song with you!”

*****

come with me, my love (to the sea of love) by @lepetitepeach {Skam France -Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 4816 words }

written for aquarium

there’s a small touch of wonder to everything that lives in the ocean

*****

critter cottage by @spacekardemomme {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 1546 words }

As he walked further into the room, he watched the rise and fall of eliott's chest, the way his hair is messily sprawled along the pillow, a few strands scattered across his forehead and cheekbones.

this is who i’m meant to spend the rest of my life with

*****

Yearning for more than a blue day by @modestytreehouse  {Skam Norway - Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen - 3723 words  }

written for brunch date 

He really should leave while Isak is still asleep and spare him the awkwardness of waking up beside Even. Spare himself the shame when Isak recognizes him.

*****

Kings of the cargo hold by @evakuality {Skam Norway - Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen -  3029 words}

written for cruise // art created by @hjertetssunnegalskap1 

“You’re early,” a voice says, a breathy, stuttery quality to it as its owner pants into the room behind Isak, the clatter of his feet loud as his footsteps echoes off the metal of the walls. “I was supposed to be here before you.” “What is all this?” Isak gestures at the table laid out in front of them. “Well, you agreed to eat with me,” Even says, his unfairly gorgeous blue eyes lit up as he stares into Isak’s soul

Aka, the one where Even gets extra as he prepares for the perfect moment with Isak.

*****

sens de la vie by @livvyblxckthxrn {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 2809 words}

written for museum date

a little dive into all of those instagram pics and stories

*****

det betyr jo alltid noe, det gjør jo det by @pagnilagni {Skam Norway - Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen - 8722 words }

written for apple picking // in Norwegian // translation in English by Bolomapa

Han står oppgitt ute på den overgrodde plenen og ser på epletrærne. De er gamle og krokete, har altfor mange greiner, de henger for tett sammen under den tette trekronen, tynget av røde epler tett i tett, de skulle vært tynnet, sa naboen, og treet skulle vært beskåret, han sa det et par uker etter at han beskar sine egne trær. “Men det er for sent nå, sevjen stiger, treet kommer til å blø i hjel. Du får ta det neste år i stedet”, hadde han sagt, mens han klappet ham faderlig på skulderen.

Han ser på epletrærne med den modne frukten, en mengde epler har falt ned i natt, mange flere enn i går, han burde plukke dem nå, han burde absolutt det. Men hva skal han med dem, lurer han på, en fortvilende klump i magen spør ham om svaret på det, for han aner ikke, å bruke en kilo epler er greit, kanskje to, han kan vel bake to eplekaker, men alt dette, det må være hundrevis av kilo, hva faen bruker folk dette til?

*****

You’ll never believe how ice cream helped this man to get a date by @nofeartina    {Skam Norway - Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen - 3333 words }

written for ice cream 

If it wasn't for Magnus, Isak would never have ended up at this ridiculous hipster ice cream place. But then again, he never would have met that ridiculously cute ice cream guy, either.

Sometimes it really pays off being a good friend.

Or 5 times Isak buys ice cream for Magnus and 1 time Even buys it for Isak.

*****

come and fade me by @ho1ogram {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 3957 words}

written for grocery shopping

And no matter how many times he repeats the same lines over and over again till he runs out of reasons to support why dating should be banned (it's a lie; Lucas will never run out of reasons for this purpose, he just gives in to the looks the boys - or Eliott - throw at him) that his friends understand his struggles, his pleas for them to stop. And always, like clockwork, he ends in having them set him up with an unknown guy.

or, Lucas is tired of going on dates after dates with guys that aren't Eliott, and Eliott has a few tricks up his sleeves.

*****

Thousand spires and thousand bridges by @hjertetssunnegalskap1 {Druck - Matteo Florenzi/ David Schreibner - 46352 words}

written for vacation // art by @hjertetssunnegalskap1

In this world, Matteo and David met during Abitur back in Berlin, just like in the canon story and they made sandwiches and almost kissed at the neon party, but David backed out, Matteo did the same and.... nothing more happened.

Now they are studying in Prague. Matteo thinks he lost his chance with David a long time ago. What David thinks, nobody knows.

*****

it's nice to have a friend by @livvyblxckthxrn {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 6592 words}

written for rollerskating

5 times eliott and lucas definitely were not on a date, and one time they were

*****

to all who come to this happy place, welcome by @tawmlinsun {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 4703 words }

written for disneyland // art by @cottonsdraw

"eliott demaury, you just passed your bac. what are you going to do now?"

"i'm taking my boyfriend to disneyland!"

*****

Super Smash Bros by @thegirlnooneknows5 {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 11672 words}

written for video games // playlist

“Okay. Pretend I’m a customer. Sell me this game.”

Eliott's smile was determined. “You ever had a customer you wanted to throw into the wall?”

“Countless.”

“Knock-Out X lets you live that fantasy.” He pulled the game off Lucas’ lap and held it up. The thought of Eliott’s hands so close to him coloured Lucas’ face pink. Eliott continued, “Just imagine if you could throw that customer into a wall and leave with no scratches, bruises or consequences. And look super badass while doing it.” “Seriously, though. You’re going to love it.”

-Or, a Striking Vipers Elu au in which they fall in love through a virtual reality game because love transcends all

*****

Coffee, Gay Gurus, and a Dance by @amyriadfthings {Druck - Matteo Florenzi/David - 1242 words}

written for coffee date

Good things happen over coffee. David & Matteo visit a veritable Berlin cultural institution and learn how to swing dance. Gay Gurus in action. Bonus gay gurus to appear eventually.

*****

Small Things by @probablydaydreamingg​ {Skam Italy - Niccolò Fares/Martino Rametta - 3232 words}

written for concert

Martino gave Nico two tickets for a concert as a graduation present. A cute date ensues.

*****

Hedgehog, on the rocks by @flying-elliska {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 4635 words}

written for drinks

Lucas's boyfriend just left him, two days before he has to go to his cousin's wedding, who just so happens to be marrying the town billionaire, and his friends are all otherwise engaged...

So as he arrives alone, he heads to the bar for some liquid courage.

Turns out the bartender isn't having a great evening either. So he embarks Lucas in a creative quest to find him the perfect beverage...

...

It's not a date yet. But there's still time...

*****

If I Should Fall Behind by @irazor {Skam Norway - Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen - 14732 words}

written for fancy dinner // art by @lovethem2121

The plan for tonight had been crystal clear. Stay close to his best friend, and steal her away if needed. Hold her hand through the ordeal of meeting Noora again for the first time in years. Then Even shows up – and suddenly, nothing goes the way it was supposed to.

Or: 3 times Isak didn't know what to say to Even, and 1 time he did.

*****

Fontainebleau by @hallo-catfish {Skam France - Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 12770 words}

written for camping

Lucas, let’s go camping, Eliott says, and with a vision of perfect quiet and green leaves unfurling before his eyes, Lucas agrees without even looking up from his problem set.

*

The summer after Lucas' first year in university, Lucas and Eliott take a weekend trip to Fontainebleau. 

*****

Under Starry Skies Above by @fille-lioncelle {Druck - Matteo Florenzi/David Schreibner - 7197 words}

written for weekend getaway 

Matteo and David have been feeling a little dejected, so Matteo suggests they get away for a weekend trip.

*****

Lost & bound by @hjertetssunnegalskap1 {Skam Norway -  Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen - 16397 words)

written for bicycle date

Even has been in a bicycle accident and he has lost his memory of the past three years. However, Isak gets a shock when Even tells him that they’re bonded soulmates, and expects them to be a couple.

*****

Così fan tutte by @hallo-catfish {Skam France - Chloé Jeanson/Lucille, Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant - 14070 words}

written for opera

Lucille goes to the opera. It’s another double date.

*****

ART

➔ @hjertetssunnegalskap1 : X - X

➔ @cottonsdraw : X

A TOTAL OF 196,241 WORDS HAS BEEN WRITTEN FOR THIS FEST, CONGRATULATIONS AND THANK YOU TO ALL THE PARTICIPANTS! 

[applesdefinitely]

they cut the scene, so here’s my version of another boring kids and weather talk lol. (the original post by @leeuwchen )

"Actually, yeah," Ringo contemplated the fridge's contents, "you should apologize to Leni. Like, what if your parents were all aww my son has a crush on you, isn't it adorable? You'd totally flipped out, run away to Australia and become Crocodile Dandee or something."

"Just so you know," Paco said, " - and close the damn fridge already! Just so you know, I lost my virginity at fifteen. To my mom's super hot best friend."

"That's kind of gross." Ringo took a bottle of water and sat on the windowsill. "and also a criminal offence, so I don't know what you got to to be so smug about. Or was it legal in your youth? When was it, the sixties?"

"Oh shut up, man! How old were you, Mr. Prude, twenty?"

Ringo's grin flickered for a second. "No, fifteen as well. Summer camp, terribly unoriginal."

"A hot girl instructor? Or maybe a hot guy instructor?"

Ringo laughed, "You know I'm not into old people. I had a crush on Till once but that was more about his tailored shirts I think."

Paco's face lit up like a christmas tree. "Whaaaaat? Till Weigel? Oh god that's amazing. Can i tell him? Wait, wait, I'll tell him that you have a crush on him now still and like, has been suffering manfully in silence for years, yearning for his sweet sweet smile. Maaan that's gonna be awesome."

Ringo shrugged. "Have fun, I guess. But if Ute challenges me to pistols at dawn I'm giving you up immediately, just so you know." he stretched his legs the length of the windowsill and closed his eyes. "Like I don't have enough drama in my life."

"You? Shut you mouth, man, you're the most happily married guy in the neighborhood." Paco's smile dimmed. “Or the only one even.”

Ringo glanced at him and said a little hastily, "Instead of planning pranks you really should be on your knees praying right now."

"Huh?"

"Yes, praying ardently so your daughter doesn't take too much after you in the virginity-losing aspect. She already likes older guys, you know.."

"Bite your tongue you vile creature," Paco's face was a picture of unimaginable horror.

Ringo paused. "Although in this analogy, wouldn't she have to sleep with - me?" he made a face. "Ugh. You can sleep soundly, best friend."

Paco laughed and shuddered at the same time. "Oh god help us all, I have no idea how we'll get through this. Puberty is hell."

"Tell me about it." he jumped down and straightened his suit jacket. "Come on, I'll buy you a coffee for your troubles."

"Easy will get me one for free, you mean."

"Naturally. And Paco? Apologize to your daughter, okay? While she's not off to space to become Cowboy Bebop yet."

[haazeycoffee-archive]

A "Hot" Kiss - Short .:Friendlypack Fic:.

"And thank you again, sir, for allowing me to deliver you the freshest water in all of Los Santos, with a maximum of only 10% lead per bottle! Feel free to call back anytime you need Stan the Water man's top notch wat-".

"Yeah yeah, thanks. Whatever".

Stan was quickly interrupted by his customer, who had just slammed the door in his face. The blond-haired delivery man just mumbled out a simple "huh", before walking back over to his delivery scooter and getting on "Maybe I...talk too much? hmm.." just as he was about to drive away, his phone started to ring. 

huh... who could that be?

Kiki, Reggie, and Anna were all busy doing another big photoshoot, which, according to Kiki, was hobo-exclusive this time, so Stan couldn't go. Garrett was taking a day off form work to party with his friends, which included Alan. Brenda was busy with work, and so was Jimmy, who was selling oxy. 

A sudden nasty feeling gripped Stan's heart when he looked at his phone and saw his new boyfriend's number. He and Jimmy had just gotten together the week prior, and for some reason, Stan started to worry about him more often. Maybe it was because of all these new feelings? Stan, and Jimmy for that matter, had just came out as bisexual a week ego, so these last few days have been pretty emotional.

"Hey there, Jimmy! Everything alri-".

"ST-...AH AH STAN!".

Getting interrupted yet again, Stan was taken aback by Jimmy's vigorous breathing; it sounded like he just ran a marathon!

"Jimmy? W-What's wrong? Why are you so out of breath?".

"STAN, I-I'M AT YOUR APARTMENT. I-I NEED YOU".

Stan's expression changed from concerned to absolutely confused "Wha- ...why-".

"J-JUST GET OVER HERE, PLEASE!" Jimmy begged before violently coughing into the phone.

"O-Okay okay! I'll be right over!".

-----

After finally making it back to his apartment building, Stan parked his scooter and hurried to the stairs, running past Vincent in the process, who was trying to get his attention "CAN'T TALK NOW, VINNIE! JIMMY'S IN TROUBLE! I'LL TEXT YA LATER".

Stan was already in his apartment by the time Vincent responded, so he didn't get to hear what the ShamWow guy had said, but he was too focused on Jimmy anyway. 

"Jimothy?" Stan muttered as he stepped into the kitchen "J-JIMMY!".

To Stan's shock, the younger man was sitting on the ground leaned against the counter. He was also shaking, and was sweating terribly. His sunglasses were sitting on the counter, so Stan could clearly see that Jimmy's face and eyes were super red. Wait, ...was he crying? Was he high? And why was he panting so hard?

"STAN!" Jimmy jolted himself up to his feet and tightly hugged his water-obsessed boyfriend, before quickly pulling away.

"Jesus, Jimmy! What the hell happened?" He gasped "D-Did you overdose?!".

Jimmy sighed in aggravation "S-Stan, if I overdosed, I'd be fuckin' dead on the floor! N-No I didn't fuckin' overdose!".

"WELL SORRY FOR ONLY BEING WATER-SAVVY! What's wrong with you then?!"

"O-Okay, s-so, I-I was....I was out selling oxy, ...l-like normal, right? A-And... and the guys that robbed us at the bank, ..uh-uh b-bird, clown, bear? Th-They wanted some oxy, s-so I was more than glad to sell it to them, y-ya'know, b-because I thought if I ..d-did-didn't, they'd kill me. So I give them the oxy, a-and instead of paying me with money, they gave me a plastic zip-bag of-of peppers. I-I knew they'd probably shank me if I said no, s-so I just took the peppers and left".

Stan crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow "Okay...".

"So, I decided to take a little, ..o-oh Jesus Chri-" Another harsh cough interrupted him, and he bent over a little, placing his hands on his knees to cough more easily "EHCK, eh.. I-I sat down on a bench t-to take a little break, a-and I ate some of the peppers". He straightened himself up and wiped the sweat from his forehead "I ate three......a-and it tur-t-turns out they were ghost peppers".

"Ghost peppers?! Those SUPER hot peppers that'll burn your mouth?!".

"yES!!!" Jimmy replied with another cough, making his voice hoarse. 

"Well did you drink any water? I have plenty here!".

"DAMMIT STAN, WATER DOESN'T DO SHIT WITH STUFF LIKE THIS!! …..B-But....y-yeah, ….I drank the rest of the water in your apartment...".

"WHAT? If you knew it wasn't going to work, why'd you do it?".

"MY MOUTH IS ON FIRE, STANIEL! I PANICKED, OKAY? Y-You seriously don't have any milk?!".

Stan gave a typical glare "You know I don't believe in that crap!!".

Jimmy let out a groan of pain and frustration as he stressfully rubbed his face and pulled at his dark-teal hair with his fists "C-Could you drive me to the store s-so we can buy some milk?".

"No way! No boyfriend of mine is drinking that tainted liquid!".

"STAN, PLEASE" Jimmy begged desperately "I-I'LL PAY FOR IT! I-I just need it, please!!".

Stan sighed "Alright alright, c'mon you big baby. Let's go".

-----

"Apologize, you big a-hole! Jimmy is in a butt-load of pain and you just scolded him like a fudging jerk! Sure, milk is terrible for you, b-but if it's the only thing that'll help Jimmy, then it's fine in SOME circumstances. You love Jimmy, but he doesn't know that because you yelled at him like a big meanie!" Stan scolded himself in his thoughts as he drove to the convenience store with Jimmy in the passenger seat, who was still sweating and panting.

As they stopped at a red light, Jimmy leaned back in his seat and dramatically pressed his palms into his face "A RED LIGHT?! COME ONNNNNN! I'M DYING HERE!".

As the teal-haired man groaned, Stan worked up the courage to apologize to him "H-Hey Jimmy?".

Jimmy sighed and turned his head "Yeah, Sta-Stan?".

"I'm sorry for yelling at you back there. Water is more perfect than anything, but...it doesn't work for every situation, so... I'm sorry for being such a jerk.".

"It's okay, Stan... I-I'm sorry for yelling too...".

"A-And besides, ...water is perfect, …b-b-ut...there's two things I cherish in life more than water: my sweet baby boy Roy, ..and you".

Just for a moment, the pain from the peppers subsided, and Jimmy's heart swelled. He couldn't help but smile from ear to ear.

Stan awkwardly shuffled his hands, which were sitting on the steering wheel "U-Uhmm… heh, ...uh..." a faint shade of pink painted his face "U-Uh, me...kiss you....?".

Jimmy laughed, remembering how awful Stan was at flirting "Yes, Sunflower. Me kiss you".

Stan smiled widely and leaned closer to his beloved boyfriend, with Jimmy doing much of the same. Their lips pressed together, and as their eyes closed to enjoy the moment, Jimmy gently placed his hand on the back of Stan's head.

Sure, these two got into their fair share of fights, but they loved each other more than anything, and moments like these were always super affectionate and romantic. Warmth filled their hearts as they kissed.

After a good while of sharing sweet smooches, the two men backed away. Jimmy was still dying of the ghost peppers' unforgiving heat, but he let out a small sigh of relief "Heh, w-Why don't we... ..w-why don't we do that more often?" he asked, realizing he was out of breath again from the peppers.

"'Cause we're stupid" Stan chuckled jokingly as he began to drive when the light turned green. Jimmy, still suffering, managed to laugh gently at the man's amusing response.

Just as they started to pull into the convenience store's small parking lot, Stan began to feel a hot sensation pool in his throat. His eyes widened and he parked the car, feeling sweat gradually start to build up at his forehead.

".....St-......Stan...?".

"H-Ho-Holy shit, I-I mean crap! H-HOLY CRAP!" Stan frantically unbuckled his seat belt, his hands fumbling a little "FUCK, IT'S HOT! I-I MEAN FUDGE!".

Jimmy's eyes lit up and his jaw dropped in realization. That kiss... it must've transferred some of the scolding hot pepper taste to Stan!

Stan was in full panic mode, and was now just as sweaty and just as bright red as his boyfriend "WATER!! WATE RWATER W ATER".

"STAN, WATER'S NOT GOING TO WORK!" Jimmy shouted as they rushed out of their car and into the store. 

The cashier just watched speechlessly as the two men rushed over to the refrigerated area and searched for whatever it was that they needed. Jimmy made a break for the milk, grabbing a small bottle so he could chug it right then and there. Stan, on the other hand, was chugging down all the water he could "WHY ISN'T IT WORKING?!" he panted.

"H-Holyyyy shit, that's soooo much better!" Jimmy sighed, the pleasantness of relief and milk graced his taste buds as he continued to drink more "Thank you, sweet cow juice" he mumbled quietly as he hugged the medium-sized carton of milk close to him.

"STAN, WHAT THE FUCK?!" A sudden piercing voice disrupted them, and they both quickly realized that it was Kiki Chanel, who was with Reggie and Anna.

"Kik-K-Kiki? W-What are you doing here?" Stan panted, his mouthful of water spilling out onto his blue polo shirt.

"I told you, Stan! We're shooting for my next line of KOC! Hashtag SPICY~" Kiki posed fabulously as she named the hashtag "What the hell are YOU doing here?".

"W-WELL, JIMMY GOT GHOST PEPPERS FROM A GROUP OF CRIMINALS A-AND ATE THREE OF THEM, A-AND AS I WAS DRIVING HERE TO GET HIM SOME MILK, W-WE KISSED IN THE CAR A-AND NOW MY MOUTH IS BURNING UP! I-I WANTED TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER FOR YELLING AT HIM EARLIER, B-BUT I FAILED TO REALIZE THE CONSEQUENCES OF KISSING SOMEONE WHO HAD JUST EATEN GHOST PEPPERS".

"You two are dating? Well congratulations, Staniel! Damn, I didn't think you'd ever actually find someone" Reggie said with his trademark, maniacal laugh "Like, EVER!".

"Yeah, congratulations Stan! We're really happy for you" Anna said with her sweet, soft voice.

"O-OH THANK YOU" Stan coughed, his voice cracking and starting to sound emotional.

"OOH!" Kiki clapped her gloved hands together "THIS. IS. PERFECT! Stan, Jim, you two just keep doing what you're doing! Anna, Reggie, get into position and get ready to say 'hashtag spicy' on my say so!".

The two models posed fashionably in front of Jimmy and Stan, who were both still suffering from what was basically heat stroke at this point.

"HASHTAG SPICY!" Reggie and Anna spoke in a synchronized manner after Kiki told them "go!".

"Ah! Fannntastic! Wonderful! Now c'mon, team! Just two locations left! See ya later, Stan! Thanks for the photo op~". 

With that, the trio of models were gone.

Stan groaned painfully as he slammed his fist onto the fridge door, whining loudly.

Jimmy, now mostly relieved of the heat, walked over to Stan and kissed him gently on the cheek "Are you sure you don't want any of this milk? It'll make you feel better than if you popped an oxy".

The agonized water man wailed in defeat "alriiiiight!" he cried out, grabbing the milk and quickly downing the rest of it. His face immediately contorted into an expression of pure disgust. 

Jimmy sighed with a roll of his eyes "Feel better, Sunflower?".

"A-A little. Can we just go home now?" Stan continued to whine.

Jimmy chuckled "Yeah. C'mon, you big baby" he teased as he took hold of Stan's hand "Let's go".

-------

Written by: @Gay-Spaghetti

Hope you guys enjoyed this! :3 Mayyyybe I'll write more Friendlypack fics if I come up with more ideas :P Thank you, Dorkskittles for letting me submit this! Love ya! <3

Response))OMLLLL SPAGHETTI THIS WAS SO GOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!! EEE SO TENSE AT THE BEGINNING BUT IT EVENED OUT AS IT WENT ON!!! SO GOOD SJSJSJ YOUR WRITING IS VERY ENJOYABLE TO READD!!!

[youngbloodseavey]

it started with a spider... // zach herron

moodboard by @tempus-ut-luceant

request: none

summary: while balancing superhero life and normal life, teenage superhero zach herron suddenly has a new variable swing into his balance. a love life.

pairing: spiderman!zach x fem!reader

triggers: cursing

disclaimer: this is NOT a direct copy of spiderman homecoming. there will be some parts that mirror the movie, but the dialogue and plot will not be the same. so like don’t expect this to be the same as the movie okay i’m glad we got that cleared up lmao

*imagine their secret best friend handshake to be the one peter and ned do in homecoming okay thanks

||

zach herron was the last person anyone would think to be a superhero.

he was goofy and clumsy, not to mention a bit oblivious at times. he was an outcast in midtown high school, despite his charming personality.

“hey zachy-boy,” flash’s familiar sneer made itself known, the rosy-cheeked boy letting out a deep sigh. his chocolate brown eyes removed their gaze from the dirty linoleum floor, looking up at flash. he didn’t say anything, he knew that opening his mouth would just make it worse.

“what? too scared to say anything? you’re such a pussy, heroin,” flash scoffed, calling zach by the nickname he had dubbed him. “now get out of my way you little bitch.” flash didn’t give him any time to move, instead opting to shove zach out of the way and into the lockers.

the laughter of flash and his cronies echoed in zach’s ear, and his gaze met the tiles again as he began to scurry to his locker.

zach could feel the gazes from other students locked on his back, the pity and the judgement. the stares he knew all too well.

“zach!” the brown-haired boy jumped, his stride being stopped by a hand grabbing his shoulder. zach was whisked around, now facing his stopper.

“what do you want corbyn?” zach didn’t mean to sound irritated when talking to his best friend, but it simply came out that way. zach was having a very shitty day. he turned away and began walking to his locker again, corbyn jogging beside him to keep up.

“geez, what has your panties in a twist? was it flash again?” corbyn’s jogging came to a halt, slowing down to a casual walk.

“when is it not flash?” zach grumbled, finally arriving at his locker and putting his combination in. he opened it, the door of the locker slamming into the others, creating a resounding bang.

zach put his math textbook back into the locker, using the other hand to retrieve his ap chemistry textbook as corbyn kept talking.

“i’m sorry dude, you have to start defending yourself against him though. you can’t keep letting him push you around like this,” corbyn’s voice softened, but zach didn’t respond. “here, i know what’ll make you feel better. wanna play fortnite later?” zach perked up at the mention of his favorite video game.

“sure! do you wanna come over to mine? i can have aunt may pick up some pizza and i just got this dope new skin-” zach’s smile began to grow as his ramblings went on.

“you had me at pizza dude. i’ll be there at 7.” corbyn replied. zach finished retrieving his supplies, and turned back around to face his best friend.

“i’ll see you then.” zach and corbyn did their secret best friend handshake, before corbyn ran off to his calculus class.

zach took in a deep breath before closing his locker, beginning to walk towards his ap chemistry class. he located the classroom in no time, taking his seat in the back of the room.

an array of beakers and lab equipment laid before him, signaling that they were going to be doing a lab in class. his eyes trailed up to the clock on the wall, seeing that he was a minute or two early for class.

perfect.

he pulled out his notebook, retrieving a pencil from the front pocket of his backpack. he quickly flipped to a page titled “web fluid”, and the numbers and elements began working in his brain.

he scribbled down notes, remembering how his fluid had performed the last time he had used it and how he could improve it.

ideas flew through his head in a pace so rapid his hands could barely keep up.

maybe if i switch up this with this then the structural integrity will-

zach’s thoughts were cut off by someone sitting next to him, and he quickly closed his notebook. his eyes flew to the figure that sat next to him, and he simultaneously relaxed and tensed up when seeing who it was.

“hey zach!” y/n’s melodic voice rang out, sending a shiver down his spine.

“h-hi y/n,” zach’s cheeks flushed a deeper red, and he turned the other way. y/n y/l/n was the only person in the entire world who made him feel this way.

she was the epitome of perfect to zach. from the way her hair bounced as she walked through the hallways to the way her eyes sparkled when she smiled. she was completely, utterly, perfect.

and to his luck, she was assigned to be his lab partner for the entire school year.

y/n took no notice of zach’s flustered expression, pulling out her notebook and a pencil.

“how are you?” y/n asked, a soft smile still painted on her face as she flipped to a blank page in her notebook.

“i’m doing-” so much better now that i’m here with you. “-good! how are you today?” zach responded, gaining his composure back.

“i’m good.” she shot him another stunning smile. “so zach, i was wondering-”

“okay class,” y/n was cut off by the sound of mrs. schwartz’s voice, the teacher’s heels clacking on the linoleoum as she strolled into the classroom. “today we’ll be doing a lab.” mrs. schwartz began to explain the lab, taking a whiteboard marker and beginning to draw out diagrams and instructions.

“what were you going to say?” zach whispered, his eyes flickering from the board to y/n.

“i’ll tell you later.” she responded, beginning to copy down mrs. schwartz’s words into her notebook.

his mind couldn’t seem to focus on whatever bullshit mrs. schwartz was spewing, instead focusing on the fact that y/n y/l/n had something to tell him.

“-you guys have until the end of the period to complete the lab, and your lab reports will be due next week. get to work.” with that mrs. schwartz sat down at her desk, beginning to grade papers or whatever teachers did as the class began to work.

y/n and zach got to work, beginning to measure and add components to their mixture. his mind worked quickly, working out equations and elements in his brain.

soon enough, class was over and y/n and zach were left with a perfect experiment and a half-written lab report. 

zach stuffed his notebook and pencils in his backpack, beginning to make his way out of the classroom when he felt a soft hand grab his arm. he spun around, seeing that the hand that had grabbed him belonged to none other than y/n.

“hey, i never got to ask you that thing earlier,” she started, and zach’s pulse began to pick up.

“oh yeah, what was it?” he managed to choke out, sounding at least semi-cool while doing so.

“so i’m throwing this party at my house tomorrow,” she bit her lip, tucking a few strands of hair behind her ear. “and i was wondering if you wanted to come?” zach’s heart stopped.

holy fucking shit. y/n y/l/n just invited me to one of her parties.

y/n’s face faultered at his pause. “i know parties really aren’t your thing but i just thought it’d be fun if you could come but you don’t have to if you don’t want to i-” she began to ramble, her face turning a shade of crimson.

“n-no! i-” he cleared his throat. “i’d love to go.” y/n’s face lit up at his response. a wide smile spread across her gorgeous features, setting zach’s stomach into a flurry of butterflies.

“cool! i’ll text you the address-” she paused. “wait, i don’t have your number.” she pulled her iphone out of her back pocket. “put your number in.”

zach gingerly took her phone, shakily typing in his number into a new contact. he handed her back the phone, and she happily saved his contact with the name ‘zach :)’.

“i’ll text you tonight! see you tomorrow zach.” with a smile and a wave, y/n began to walk out of the room, leaving zach stuck in his tracks. “oh!” she turned back around. “bring corbyn too, my friend christina thinks he’s cute and i think it’d be fun to have him there.” with a final grin she walked out of the room, zach left practically starstruck.

i was just invited to a party by y/n.

his heart raced at the realization, and a grin spread across his face so wide it hurt. zach nearly whooped out loud, and he pumped his fist in the air.

he practically sprinted out of school, taking a quick look to make sure no one was around before leaping over the front gate to the school, doing a front flip before landing. 

he could barely contain his excitement, running to his special alleyway and beginning to change out of his school clothes to his spiderman suit. 

he stumbled over his feet a few times, accidentally hitting his funny bone on the dumpster. zach let out a short yelp, his feet tangling together. he nearly fell over, but managed to stay on his feet. 

he slipped his feet into the legs of the suit, pulling the fabric over his boxers and bare torso. he quickly slid his arms into their respective places, pulling the suit until it loosely covered everything but his head.

zach pressed onto the spider icon on the chest of his suit, and the fabric immediately shrunk to perfectly fit his body.

it’s go time.

zach quickly tossed his backpack into the air, webbing it to stick to a brick wall in the alley. with a final jump into the air, zach pulled on his mask and began to swing through the air.

time to be a friendly neighborhood spiderman.

||

“and some nice old lady bought me a churro!” zach said, taking another bite of said churro. he was on his daily phone call with happy hogan, who was mr, stark’s right hand man. 

zach was currently sitting on the fire escape of his apartment building, still clad in his spiderman suit. his mask was off of course, so he could eat the churro without the fabric getting in the way.

zach always called happy every day to update him on what he had done that day, from stopping bike robberies to helping cats out of trees. he thought that maybe, there was the smallest possibility that happy would see what good he was doing, and call him for a mission.

of course, that was a very, very slim chance.

“anyway, i hope you listen to these, because if you didn’t it’d be a waste of time,” zach paused. “well, if there are any missions you need me on, i’ll be there in a millisecond. have a nice day happy.” and with that zach ended the message, staring at his phone as he finished his churro.

he dusted off his hands, balling up the wrapper to his churro and tossing it off the balcony, the wax paper landing a couple streets away. zach shrugged and began to climb down the fire escape to his bedroom window, trying as silently as possible to open up the window.

he managed to open to window, climbing in and carefully shutting it. he crawled onto the wall, making his way across the ceiling to where his bedroom door was, the door wide open. zach skillfully closed the door, sighing in relief as he heard it click shut.

he began to crawl over to his bed, when he heard the sound of an xbox controller hit the floor. zach’s heart stopped, and he slowly looked over to meet the wide, azure eyes of corbyn.

zach immediately fell off the ceiling, landing on his feet.

“y-you’re spiderman,” corbyn stuttered, not even caring that his fortnite character had just been killed. “you’re that superhero on youtube,” corbyn’s brain could barely comprehend the fact that his clumsy, goofy, awkward bestfriend was motherfucking spiderman.

“n-no i’m not!” zach said, hitting the spider icon on his chest. his suit loosened, falling off of his body as he quickly kicked it off. “i’m not spiderman!”

“you were on the ceiling,” corbyn exclaimed, his eyes widening even more. “the fucking ceiling! you’re fucking spiderman!”

zach sighed, deciding to accept the fact that corbyn now knew his biggest secret. he stayed silent, allowing his best friend to soak in the new information.

“my best friend is a superhero,” corbyn breathed out, plopping himself down on zach’s bed. “a superhero.” his eyes widened again. “wait, how did this even happen?”

zach let out a breathe, walking over to his dresser and pulling out a random t-shirt. he pulled the fabric on, also taking out a pair of joggers and putting them on. he then walked back over to where corbyn was sitting and flopped down next to him.

“i guess it all started with this spider...”

||

taglist: @heyowdw​ @boomboomboomwayhoo​ @corbynscabbitch​ @daddy-avery @ashaverykuwonumara​ @samithepixie   @guadalupeguac @underoosmarvel @socially-awkward-xox @limelightmendes @onmywaymarais @why-dont-we-everything @seaveygirl  @dailydoseofherron @lynaminroll @74limelight @brini144@jacieesewell @vxxn128 @saving-seavey @hoobii @bambixcx@kittkatt-03 @loveherron23 @jasmin3k @peachyherron @wdw4forever @danieljames1998 @yagirlcammmm @toomanydamfandoms @xxx-allison-xxx @alyssaah15

[noro-noro-noro]

I've honestly had so many dreams recently, but I'm going through that part of the cycle where I can barely remember enough to write them down. here's what I've got

1. started out in a sci fi environment. we were exploring an underground alien place.

2. that pretty quickly turned into some kind of competition or TV show to build a house in weird locations/with weird materials. the 2nd house was a half submerged antique bus off the coast of some beach city. the bus was half underwater ut the inside was empty! we renovated it into a nice place to live. I moved my extended family in.

then we went to a place called waterfall lake or something - it was a normal lake except there was a GIANT chasm in the middle splitting it directly in half. at the bottom was a little pool area that was surrounded on either side by the sheer force of water smashing. our challenge was to build a house floating between the two sides of the chasm, or something? I thought immediately "man it looks like it'd be terrible to fall down there" & then when we got out of the helicopter, I said "how much is the current here?" & my dad said "not bad at all! it's less than the Nile!" (I do not know the current speed of the Nile.) anyway I got out of the helicopter & was immediately sucked over the edge despite my dad, sister, & other builders being fine. I grabbed onto a really sturdy unbreaking sheet of hanging moss & just kind of was hanging out about 20 feet over the edge. my dad & sister poked their heads over & just looked at me & I was like -_- thx for nothing. the talk show host threw a rope down but told me I needed to use my teeth ? for some reason. okay. anyway got back up.

3. it became nighttime & things changed enough for me to consider this a new dream. there was already something constructed. my sister & I were ?flying around surveying the area. the west half of waterfall lake had a bunch of people dressed like they'd just come home from an office job congregating on shoddy boats in the corner by the trees. I recognized the recent candidate for mayor - it was tay zonday dressed as Tommy wiseau. my sister & I landed on a piece of nearby floating rubble or a dead tree & watched as he Sparta kicked a woman in a red cardigan & gray skirt into the center of the ring of people. she did not resurface. everyone cheered & lit up torches. in the new light, Tay zonday wiseau saw us & ?floated? over to our position. don't know how he got here..maybe he had a jet ski. idk. anyway he warned us about going out at night, but also told us it was up to us to save this place.

when we went back to the hotel, which was the building constructed over the waterfall, there was a list of tasks written in dripping black on the wall across from our room. okay. it was still night time. some actions took place that I don't remember. at one point we tried to get into a house using the code, but it was changed on us. there was a lot of flying around & being chased by shadow creatures.

later, it was about 3am. we had made friends with a couple other people in the hotel, talked to Tay zonday wiseau a little more (his hints were not useful & we didn't know enough to stop whatever was coming). the shadow creatures feared light, but it would only keep them at bay shortly if it was like a flashlight or something. they could shapeshift & follow people. the light needed to be shone directly on them to disintegrate them temporarily. we watched a guy stop off at the convenience store, where all the fluorescence kept it outside. he got in his motorcycle & the creature closed in, but he turned on his front light & the creature had to back off..however, since there was no back light, the creature copied his shape of man on a motorcycle and started to follow him. some of the creatures were black blobs, but as they got stronger as the night passed, they started to be more humanlike with glowing eyes and claws.

we snuck to that house we failed to enter earlier. the code was wrong. I climbed up to the second floor stairway to try to clip inside. my sister knocked loudly on a window & I told her to keep it down! but one of our allies from the boat was there - a kid maybe age 16. he let her in & she started to go get what she needed, but the mother woke up. waking up at night in the dark she obviously was just the vessel for that other thing, and she floated with her eyes closed or maybe covered? and head tilted down. my sister made her escape immediately, but the thing inside the mother had no distinction between child or not & started to attack the son with dark energy. he was in the fetal position on the floor. I left behind a piece of my arm to shield him, so now my right arm was shorter than the left.

the sun was rising. we had made very little progress on the list of tasks, but understood more about the world. Tay zonday came to warn us again from way too invasion of my personal space & I was like :| get your hands off my shoulders. he gave us a key, or maybe reminded me my key could open most doors in the hotel. then the sun was up. there were a few daytime tasks, like help this one kid maybe 6 years old, blond, she looked like a girl named Eva that I'd worked with in 2015. she needed to go to the bathroom but had a long list of situational things that needed to be just right. her mom was dead also but we didn't tell her that. she needed to have her favorite stuffed animal (elephant) & a special blue and orange plastic belt and her favorite outfit to go poop fsr, & also during this quest I needed to find two hidden icons of "young Jafar" & "aizawa fanart". I found young Jafar while the kid was using the bathroom. but then all the stalls disappeared except for the toilet in the corner that she was using. I could not find aizawa. then I woke up

[kookie-vith-suga]

Supergirl

Word count: 2324

Warnings: Angst, Domestic violence PLEASE DON’T READ IT IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO THIS THEME!!!!

Mentions of smoking... I know it is not bad but I actually hate smoking. So don’t smoke kids! ;)

Author’s note: Kinda random. Inspired by Reamonn “Supergirl”

–> Masterlist <–

Recent: Snitch 

“Mommy, why are there only male superheros? Aren’t women also super?” The small girl pulled at the hem of her mom’s shirt to get her attention.

“Of course they are. But you are right there are not a lot of female heros. There is at least one very famous one. She is called superwoman!” 

“Oh so when I grow I can be a superwoman right?” She exclaimed excited.

“But you are already superwoman, honey!” She crouched down next to the small girl and stroked her cheek.

“No, you are superwoman mommy. I am only a girl.” The small girl smiled brightly.

“Oh you are right again. Such a smart girl. Then you must be supergirl! I totally forgot about her! She is even stronger than superwoman.”

“Wow supergirl is stronger than superwoman?”

The woman nodded while smiling at her daughter.

“I am supergirl then!” She bounced up and down.

The woman closed her arms around the little girl. “Yes, you are my precious Y/N.”

You took some water in your hands and let it splash over your face. Then you smacked your cheeks lightly and pinched them. “Stay awake Y/N!” Just another hour. Your eyes wandered to the clock at the wall. You had to take a step closer to be able to read it through the dimmed light.

2 pm. Soon I am done.

You exited the bathroom and immediately you could feel the bass of the music running through your body. You picked up two trash bags headed to the backside. You threw them away and wiped your hands on your apron. You walked towards the steps and sat down. Then you fiddled one deserved cigarette out of the backpocket of your jeans and slipped them between your lips. You lit them up and took the first deep drag. Your felt your body relax. At least a little bit. You blew the smoke into the air watching how it danced around before vanishing.

“Shouldn’t you be working?”, a voice disturbed your peace.

“Shouldn’t you?”, you laughed and took another drag of the cigarette before holding it up with an outstretched arm.

You felt it been take away. You tilted your head back and watched your boss pull on it.

“Well I am. Scolding my employee for taking unauthorized breaks during working hours is pretty much considered work.”

“Is that so? Then give me my cigarette back and I will be back to work in no time.” You streatched your arm out with a smirk on your face.

“I also see myself forced to confiscate this. It is not good for you.”

“Excuse you! Who are you to decide that?”, you acted offended.

“Your boss?”

You shook your head

“Your father?”

You shook your head again but this time you could not stop yourself from laughing out loud. You have not laughed like that in a long time.

“Your friend?” He let himself fall down next to you and held the cigarette towards you.

“Tsk. You wish.” You fetched it from him and put it between your lips.

He smile formed on his lips but he did not give you any sassy respond like you were used from him. He just stared at you with that idiotic smile.

“Do I have something on my face?” You pointed at yourself.

“No, no”, he detached his eyes from you and shook his head slowly still smiling.

“You are scaring me Kim Seokjin.” You faced the front again while pulling your knees up so you can rest your chin on it. You blew some of the smoke to the air. Your eyes stayed up and a comfortable silence spread between yourself “The sky is beautiful tonight. So many stars.”

“It is true. It is a breathtaking view.” Somehow you did not have the feeling he was talking about the night sky. The thought alone let your chest tighten.

A little too quickly you got up coughing and mumbling: “I should get back to work.”

“Y/N”, he called after you but you just headed in ignoring him.

~Flashback~

“Stop hurting mommy!” you screamed from the top of your lungs.

Your father turned around with a shocked face. It was way past your bed time already. You were not meant to hear him coming home only “a little tipsy” as he called it and scream at your mom why she did not cook something fresh. Hearing her screams of pain a little later from the force he had pushed her against the kitchen counter. Not meant to hear the noise of a fist meeting a body.

Your father walked over and kneeled down in front of you. “I love your mommy Y/N but sometimes adults have to fight. That is normal.” He wiped away a fresh tear that had escaped your eye. “Do you understand that?”

You nodded.

“Good girl. So can you promise me one thing?”

You nodded.

“Don’t go to your friends or anyone else and tell them what just happened, okay? Cause this is family business so nobody needs to know. Do you understand that?”

You nodded.

He picked you up and pressed a kiss to your cheek “Very good. You are my little supergirl. I love you, Y/N.” When he said those words it sounded like someone was scratching his nails over a board. “But you know what they say about supergirls right?”

You nodded.

“Supergirls don’t cry”, you said in unison.

“Right, that is my big girl! So you can stop crying now and go back to sleep, alright?”

You nodded.

“Then let’s get you back to bed.” He smiled his happy father smile and started heading upstairs. Over his shoulder you watched your mother coming to a sitting position. Blood was dripping from her face.

I am sorry mommy that I could not protect you. I am so sorry.

~Flashback end~

“Y/N that is it! It is all over. My whole career is ruined!”

“Whoa Bethany, don’t panick! What happened?”

“The guys who should have set up everything for my exhibition got everything wrong. I don’t know how but they got an old plan and now everything is in the wrong place! What am I suppose to do now?! I cannot take down everything on my own and anyone who could help me left already also I still have to write the text I want to have in the information flyer, have them printed, pick up the bottle of helium and inflate 200 ballons. How should I be able to manage that in ONLY five hours?!? So I think I am very well allowed to panick!”

“Okay breathe. I can be at the gallery in 30 minutes and together we will manage that.”

“B-B-but don’t you have work soon. I cannot claim your time!”

“First of all you are not claiming anything. I decided to do so. Second of all I will talk to Seokjin. I am sure I can manage it somehow. Don’t worry.”

She exhaled long. “You are my saviour Y/L/N Y/N!”

“Let us get to work first before you thank me.”

“You are right. See you soon.”

“Bye.” You hung up and immediately dialed Seokjin’s private number he gave you for emergencies. This was clearly one!

“Hello?”

“Hey Seokjin. Here is Y/N!”

“Y/N? Did something happen? Are you alright?”, he instantly questioned with a worried tone.

“Yes I am totally fine! But my friend isn’t. Her art exhibition is opening tonight and everything that could go wrong did went wrong. I am currently on my way to her and I wanted to ask if it is possible that I can come a little later to work. It will only and hour maximun three. I know this is on real short notice but everything she has worked for depends on this night and I cannot let her hanging!”

“I understand. Where is it?”

“What do you mean where?”

“Like the address.”

“Herlington street 54. But why?”

“I am coming.”

Your mouth gaped open.

“You are what?!”

“I am coming to help you”, he repeated his words a little slowlier.

“Oh no this is really too much to ask!”

“I would not offer my help when I did not have time!”, he pointed out.

“B-b-b-ut the bar?”

“Yoongi can do it. He is pretty skilled.”

“B-b-b-ut..”

“No more buts. I have to pick something up so I can be there in two hours. Is that good?”

“Totally fine!”

“Alright then we will see us later!”

“Yes. SEOKJIN!”, you exclaimed before he could hang up.

“What Y/N?”

“Thank you.”

“Anything for you, you know that!” And like that he hung up letting you with an gaped open mouth and a beating heart.

“Thank you for all your help, Seokjin. I don’t think I could have finsih it without you.” Satisfied you looked at the sea of ballons which flooded the whole entrance hall.

“That is not true. You would have managed it as good as you did it now.” He patted your shoulder.

“No, seriously. Without you it would not have worked that way!” You nodded encouraging and smiled.

His lips curled up as well while not being able to take his eyes off you.

“Oh before I forget it. The actual reason I came to be honest is...”, he fiddled something out of his jeanspocket, ”Here”, he held his closed fist towards you.

“What is this?”, you wondered.

“Give me your hand.” With a skeptical look you did.

“And close your eyes.” You did as you were said. Something small glided into your hand.

“Open up.” You did and inspected the object in your hand. You could feel his eyes were trained on your face to see your reaction.

“A necklace?” It was rather a statement then a question.

“I want you to have it.”

“Why?” You were confused.

“Because I like you and this reminded me of you.” You turned around the pendant. It was a star adn somethign was written on the back: The most breathtaking view.

“No.” An apologetic smile spread on your face.

“No?” Now he was the confused one.

“I am sorry but I cannot take this.” You held it back for him to take it.

“What are you saying?! Of course you can!” His voice raised itself in frustration.

“This is too much“, you argued.

“Not it is not. Actually it is not enough. You are doing amazing working three jobs while studying for school and still being the nicest person I know and help each and every living soul out here. For you Y/N this by far is not enough.”

“This is not true. I don’t deserve all these kind words.”

“Why are you thinking so low about yourself?! I have never ever witnessed a girl as strong willed as you Y/N. When you set something in your head you are doing it with all your heart. Look at all this here. How many hours have you worked today to get it all done huh? Don’t tell me you know one other person who would drop everything as you did today if one of their friends said they needed help? Don’t tell me there is someone as selfless as you out there? Because that is simply not possible!”

“Stop it!”, you shook your head vehemently, “Just stop it.”

He cupped your cheeks in his big hands which made you stop shaking your head.

“Listen Y/N, I want you to see how beautiful you are to me. That is why I bought this. Maybe it is unusual to confess like this but I cannot keep it in anymore.  You have all my adoration. I want to see that smile of yours every day, every minute, every second. I love you, Y/N.”

I love you. The words echoed through your head. I love you. I love you. I love you. They seemed meaningless to you since no one who ever said them to you was honest.

“This is too much for me!” You pushed his hands away and tried to move away. He wrapped his hands around your wrists before you could do so.

“Don’t run away from me Y/N. I know you love is not easy for you! I know you have been hurt and I will not pressure you into anything. But I can make you happy.”

Happy You nearly laughed out loud. Truely happy is something I haven’t been in a long time.

“You don’t understand it and I probably will never be able to make you understand but you have to believe me when I say I cannot be with you!”

Your eyes had locked with his and they were fighting a bloody fight while the both of you remained totally silent.

“No, you are wrong. I do understand”, he said after a long time. Every sparkle had vanished from his eyes and he looked at you emotionless. “This is not about you not being able to be with me but you not wanting to be with me.”

You could see the hurt in his eyes. You could see he wanted you to disagree with him. Tell him he was wrong and you loved him back. Maybe you even did so but you could not say it. Those words would never leave your lips again. Not in this life.

“I am sorry.”

The necklace slipped through your fingers before you slipped out of his hands as well. You ran towards a cold night. It was dark and the stars where out. But you could not see them. Tears were burning in your eyes. You stopped after a while breathing heavily. Your hands ran over your face through your hair. You tried to catch your breath.

Don’t cry Y/N.

You are a Supergirl.

And Supergirls don’t cry.

This got longer as expected and it is fucking late: Goodnight!

[sheewolf85]

Writing Challenge – Day 36

Prompt: Hospital visits Pair: All the SkeleBros (UT, UF, US, and SF Sanses and Papyri) and Reader Rating: G Tags/Warnings: post-surgery, female reader, reverse harem NSFW/SFW AO3 Link

You opened your eyes slowly.  The first thing you were aware of was how bright it was.  The last thing you remembered was counting down from ten as you were wheeled into the operating room.  Was it over? Where were you?  The ceiling was tiled and pockmarked, every other tile replaced with a bright florescent light.  You were hooked up to several monitors, one of them beeping steadily.

The next thing that hit your awareness was chatter.  The voices around you sounded familiar, but you couldn’t pinpoint any one of them.  One rang out louder than the others.

“she’s waking up!”  It was Sans.

You attempted to sit up, but pain ripped through your abdomen like you’d been lit on fire.  You hissed and relaxed back down.  A skeletal hand wrapped around yours and held gently.

“don’t move, honey.”  Stretch.  “you’re out of surgery. they said you might be in pain.”

“DOES SHE NEED MEDICINE?” Blue.

“OF COURSE SHE NEEDS MEDICINE!” Edge.

Were they all here?  You tried to look around without sitting up.  Skeletons filled the room to the point that you weren’t even sure a doctor or nurse could squeeze in.

You opened your mouth to try to say something.  All that came out was a whimper.  You licked your lips and realized how dry your throat was.

“Water?” you managed to rasp.

“SHE NEEDS WATER!” Edge shouted.

The shout was repeated by another skeleton—it sounded like Slim?—and then another before you could hear it echoing down the hallway.  Soon enough, a cup of ice water was put in your hands.  Sans and Stretch helped you sit up enough to take a few sips.

“ALL RIGHT, QUIT HOGGING! IT’S MY TURN TO SEE HER!”  Razz pushed his way past Sans, growling a little when Sans gave him a rude gesture.  All traces of hostility were gone when he turned to you.  “HOW ARE YOU FEELING?”

You smiled at him.  “Okay? I think?  It hurts.”  You put your hand on your stomach and winced when you tried to readjust.  “How are you all here?”

“EDGE AND I DROVE!” Blue piped up.  “RAZZ GRUMBLED ABOUT HAVING TO SIT IN THE BACKSEAT WITH PAPY, BUT WE ALL MADE IT HERE WITHOUT A SINGLE MONSTER COMMITING MURDER.”

You tried not to laugh.  “I’m glad no one died, but I meant how did you all get allowed back here? Am I even in a recovery room yet?”

Edge stepped forward.  “RAZZ AND I TEND TO BE INTIMIDATING ENOUGH TO GET WHAT WE WANT.  WHAT WE WANTED WAS TO SEE THAT YOU WERE OKAY.”  He set a hand on your leg and squeezed gently.

“You guys realized it was just gallbladder surgery, right? I wasn’t dying.”

“’course we knew that, honey,” Stretch said, still holding your hand.  “but I guess you could say none of us really trust human doctors with our favorite human.”  He lifted your hand just a little, bending over to press his teeth to your knuckles.  “surgeries like yours can be botched easily.  everything went fine, though.”

You smiled and squeezed Stretch’s hand.  “Good.  Thank you all for coming down.  I really do need something for the pain, though.  Can someone get the doctor?”

“consider it done,” Slim said from his position by the door.  He had always been the most aloof of the skeletons, but you knew he cared about you just as much as the others did.  You also knew he would probably end up dragging the doctor in by his hair. You turned your attention to Red, standing behind Edge by your foot.

“Will you go with him? Make sure he doesn’t get into trouble?”

Red snorted.  “sweetheart, the both’a us together ain’t nothin’ but trouble.  sans, you go.”

Sans sighed but nodded and left the room.

You smiled and tried to relax as you looked around the room at your skeleton friends.  You felt nothing but loved as they crowded around you and talked about what they’d done around the house to make your return as easy as possible.

[beheadingofmakai]

“Exorcist” Is A Strong Word

<- Previous Chapter

The girl’s fragile body heaved and thrashed violently as the Exorcists chanted while holding the unholy presence prisoner to shackles affixed to their own bodies, each of the men standing on opposite ends of the bed.

“...Ut inimicos sanctae circulae humiliare digneris...” the older of the two chanted as the younger focused entirely on subduing the demon’s attempts to resist with a smaller, simpler chant.

The room was dimly lit, just four candles providing both lighting and ambiance to the grotesque or extraordinary, depending on who ask, scene that unfurled in front of the terrified parents of the possessed girl, flanked by the two focused men, one tall and with wavy hair that rested in a ponytail atop his left shoulder, the other sporting shorter, dark red hair, and a far more stiff posture that spoke of inexperience and anxiety. The girl was held in place by two large, thick golden chains of light that protruded from the very bodies of the two men, a most fetid and unholy spirit attempting to resist their intervention, convulsing and shrieking in tones both audible and inaudible to humans.

“I-Is she fine!?” blurted out the concerned father of the girl, his wife holding him back and “shhh”ing him, urging him to be quiet as he was instructed. “I can’t just sit around doing nothing while my daughter is suffering like this!”

“Don’t worry, we’re almost done, sir,” replied the younger Vinn, trying to sound as calm and pleasant as possible, as if he wasn’t wrangling a creature most foul by the tentacles. “My partner is almost done with the-- Oh, here it comes, one second, please, I need to catch it.”

“...You need to catch it?”

“Benedictus Deus, Gloria Patri, Benedictus Dea, Matri Gloria!”

A blinding flash of light burst from the girl’s chest, and an ocean of pitch black darkness with dark red orbs that you might just mistake for eyes burst forth from her mouth, immediately being captured by Vinn in a small rectangular object, and just as fast as it came, it was gone. “...Eyup, that’s a good one, now let’s scram,” commented Bastian casually, slinging his coat over his shoulder and heading to the exit.

“...Jeez. Sir, madam, your daughter is perfectly fine now. She’ll be asleep for a couple of hours, but his work is as precise as he is rude, unpleasant, and smells bad in the morning. Now, I need you to come here for a second so I can give you the post-care instructions.”

“T-thank you so much, Mister Ingram! Our daughter is everything for us! Do tell us, if it’s any medicine or doctor, we’ll pay for it!”  the ecstatic mother raved, her tears of joy already streaming down her face.

As soon as they got close, Vinn grabbed them both by the back of the neck, a dull green light in his fingertips, and the couple’s eyes went white for just a second. “...Huh? Who are you? Do you have any business with us...?”

“I said that the toilet is now completely fixed.” remarked Vinn. “It shouldn’t need any further repairs. It gave us a hell of a bad time, and the smell was horrible, but we sanitized the place while we were at it. We’ll send the bill later, have a good day!”

“...Oh, right! The toilet, yeah, darn thing, kept clogging up for no reason! Why, we had some good chili some days ago, and you wouldn’t believe how hard it-- Oh, um, thanks a lot, Mister Ingram! See you around!”

                                                         ——-

“No one’s looking?”

“Nope. Let that bastard out. Imma let him have it.”

“Oh boy, alright.”

The back alley where they stood was a spacious, convenient space between two large buildings, both made of brick, with a large green dumpster on the side, and out of the sight of any city crawler that wasn’t looking for trouble. The backside of a large billboard promoting a popular soda brand hung above them as the older man spat on his hands, rubbed them together, and cracked his knuckles like a boxer about to despoil a champion of his belt. It was 2:34 PM, two men on the clock, two hands ready to guarantee the local hospital would see some action today, and two eyes that rolled at the outdated display of bravado, because, let’s face it, who the hell still spits on their own hands and rubs them together anymore? Only whatever few Pre-Amnesia cartoons that can be salvaged together do that anymore.

Vinn produced a cheap, common, and rectangular sponge from his breast pocket and squeezed it with all of his strength, a black sludge and a blood-curling scream oozing out of it. “OOWWW! Ow ow ow! Yo, hold on! No need to-- AHH! Please, come on, man, yeesh!”

As the viscous sludge hit the pavement, a vaguely person-shaped creature began forming as more and more sludge accumulated, until the sponge had been squeezed dry, and in the floor lie a young man, large and built, with broad shoulders and a body hugging t-shirt that flattered his physique. He’d probably look very dashing if he wasn’t already off the floor and against a wall, with Bastian Ashfield’s firm grip on his neck.

“Possessing a little girl, man? Really? What shitter did you come from?” barked Bastian as he turned him around and seized his wrist, pushing him face-first against the wall. “What did you do to her? Lie, you piece of shit, lie right now and give me the excuse I need to smoke your ass right this instant.”

“Woah woah, man, calm down! I didn’t do anything to her! It was just the ol’ vitality drain, you know? A man’s gotta eat!” cried the demon nervously, struggling in vain to get out of the detective’s grasp. “...I did play a couple of pranks on those old folks, but I didn’t harm no one, I mean, anyone, I swear!”

Bastian looked at Vinn, whose eyes were coated in the gentle light of Fallitur, the SSSD of True Sight. “...It checks out. He’s saying the truth. He didn’t do anything aside from getting nourishment and... Playing some pranks, I guess. This one reeks of milk, man. How old are you, 14?”

“Alright, perfect.” Bastian interrupted before the demon could answer, casually tossing him to the ground as he put his coat on. “Vinn, you remember what I told you yesterday? That I needed to confirm one extra thing with you?”

“Yes, and just as you did today in the morning, when you broke into my house in the middle of my breakfast, Bastian.” remarked the younger Exorcist with the slightest but realest hint of resentment in his voice, his delicious bacon and cereal interrupted by a certain hydromancer who stealthily got inside from a window. “...But you refused to say it because you need to be cryptic and vague and ‘mysterious’ in order to make up for lacking manners and a personality.” Vinn punctuated the word “mysterious” by doing quotation signs with his fingers.

“Where’s your sense of adventure and suspense, Ingram? Were you That Kid in school? The one that did sudoku during recess ‘cause he always lost at Hide and Seek?” -- Bastian laughed, since he clearly had gotten under Vinn’s skin -- “Well, whatever, look, you can handle sacraments and spells well, you can fight well, your heart is the right place, but I need one more thing outta you, one thing more important than those and, if you lack it, you are out of the game.”

Vinn was certainly irritated with his high maintenance and annoying partner, but it was true that he was very curious and intrigued about what this final requirement might be. “...What is it?”

“I need you to find this guy a job.”

“What?!” grunted the demon on the floor.

“What.” flatly responded Vinn.

“What~?” mockingly quipped Bastian, lifting his arms in mock surrender, saying it in a funny voice. “I said, you need to find--”

“But why do I need to find this guy a job?”

“Vinn, we are Exorcists. You remember what they taught you way back in the first year on the Academy? What is it that Exorcists do?”

“We solve crimes related to Mythics or magic, and we--!”

“...You seem to have remembered something.”

Vinn brought his hand to his mouth, almost ashamed of himself. “...It’s been so long... But yes, Exorcists... Solve Mythic and magic-related crimes, but they also serve as involved parole officers for minor crimes, which includes setting Mythics right, letting them know their rights, and assisting them in finding their place in society in a way that lets them live with dignity and a purpose.”

“...And assisting them in finding their place in society in a way that lets them live with dignity and a purpose”. Bastian said these words alongside Vinn, his mocking demeanor gone and his hands reaching for a cigarette. “...It’s definitely not unwelcome to know that you can crack skulls when you need to, and that you care about Mythics, but see, if you can’t actually provide this help to them, then I don’t need you. The Academy’s fucked up, ain’t it? You spend one class in the first year talking about the supposed duty of the Exorcist, and then the rest of it all is learning how to pulverize them, or worst, how to smoke them. It never comes back up, does it? Not in the entire god damn MAB-approved and cooked curriculum. Well, Vinn, if you are going to truly help me set this rotten MAB right, you are going to show me you can do the most important job: Helping Mythics out for realsies. Not ‘beating up Mythics’, not ‘gathering evidence’, but actually caring and showing concern for Mythics that deserve this help, that with just that little push, can find their place in this God forsaken city.”

“...” Vinn held his tongue tight because Bastian was absolutely right. The Mythic Affairs Bureau’s Mythic Law Enforcement Academy’s education was mostly based on immediately assuming Mythics were a threat to humanity, something that always bothered Vinn, but the fact that even then, all he could think about this current case was to just give the demon a warning and letting him go instead of doing his duty properly was enough to make shame itch from within his skin. Vivid memories of his time at the Academy popped into his head, all the spellcasting, all the sacrament learning, the weaknesses of Mythics, what items and elements were most effective at hurting each type, and among all of these, he had naught a memory of Mythic rights or how to properly help them. “...Oi, Bastian, generally speaking, how many Exorcists would’ve killed this guy for what he did?”

Bastian’s face grew grim. “...Seven out of ten, I’d say. They would’ve truly and well exorcised him instead of just pulling him out. This one’s weak, too, so they wouldn’t have bothered like this, definitely”. The demon, who had gotten back on his feet but had not dared make a run for it, gulped visibly. “I’m going back to the Office to interview our lovely necromancer nurse. Help this guy out properly. I’m not demanding you do this in a day, but put your truest and hardest into this. I want to see if you can really call yourself an Exorcist.”

As Bastian walked away, Vinn recovered his composure and approached the demon. Short, stylish black hair, tight black t-shirt, built physique, and jeans. He was dressed as the most generic Joe out there, but his particularly model-like physique set him apart, and he’d look handsome if he wasn’t trembling in his sneakers. The somewhat red eyes of the demon avoided contact with Vinn’s green own as he uncomfortably shuffled in place. It was easy to see that he was not exactly calm, alone in a back alley with an Exorcist who had just caught him red handed.

“Oi, calm down. My name’s Vinn Ingram, and honestly, I am not going to harm you at all. I don’t get kicks from kicking kids like you around, so come on, ease up, what’s your name?”

“...How could you tell I’m a kid? I am pretty sure I have the appearance of an adult male right now. Are you a really experienced Exorcist?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, totally, I’ve been doing this for a while.” responded the man on his second day of work. “I just know how to tell Mythics apart really well by now. Demons especially.”

“...Mathanac. 17 years old, almost 18. This is my True Form, though, I’m not trying to look older on purpose. Look, I realize what I did was wrong, so please, can we not do the smoking thing? I didn’t hurt anybody, just maybe slid a couple of ice cubes down someone’s trousers, and, um, maybe I printed out scary pictures and hid them behind the shower’s curtain... And...”

“...And?”

“Well, um, maybe I spun my head a couple of times to freak ‘em out.”

“...I can’t even be mad at you for that one, it’s a classic.”

“Yeah! See? So please, come on, man, just give me a pass here, I’ll really be on my best behavior! Don’t put me in a room with that other guy, please.”

Vinn scratched the back of his head. Interaction after interaction, he understood one thing more and more with each word that came out of anyone that ever mentioned Exorcists: They were feared, they were dreaded, and they weren’t welcome, not by the Mythics they were supposed to guide, nor by the Humans they were supposed to protect.

Turns out, this job wasn’t as rosy or as noble as initially expected, if you have basic decency and a moral compass. Though he had serious personality problems, that was the one thing Vinn did like about Bastian: It was truly luck for him to be partnered with what seemed to be one of the few decent Exorcists in the line of duty, if the comments of anyone he’s ever met so far on the clock and his own experiences in the MLEA were anything to go by.

 “...Look, man, I am not going to hurt you at all. We are kinda close in age too, I’m just 21. All I want to do is help you find your place in this city so you don’t have to resort to possessing people again, and so you don’t get in trouble again. Tons of Mythics live just fine and without causing trouble, so there’s no reason to believe you wouldn’t be able to as well.”

“...21?” Mathanac took a step back and stabbed Vinn with doubtful eyes. “...You just said you were a very experienced Exorcist, but you are just 21? Liar alert! You are trying to bamboozle me! Trick me, even!”

“Oh! No no, uh, it’s just--!”

     Of kindred spirits, ink stains, and the reassuring caress of purpose:                                 – Chapter 2: "Exorcist” Is A Strong Word –

“See! You are just another Exorcist that wants to have his kicks by smoking me the moment I decide to trust you!”

“Aah, crap, look, sorry... I’ll explain, I’ll explain, please believe me.” Vinn sighed deeply, nervously fiddling with his hands just slightly. “I... Have been around demons since I was a kid. I know what to look for when trying to identify their age.”

Mathanac looked less panicked but no less confused than before. “...You’ve been around demons since you were a kid...? Aren’t you an Exorcist? Isn’t it your job to put us out of commission?”

“Ahh, man, look, “Exorcist” is a strong word, I like to think of myself as a civil worker first and foremost, ‘cause to be honest, screw having to outright off Mythics for small shit, you know? It’s not fair. I try to at least do my part, it’s what I’ve always aimed to do, since the first day I entered the Academy.”

The demon was taken aback. Demons are creatures fundamentally made of emotions, and they can read the emotions of others better than they can read between lines. Mathanac sensed no subterfuge or trickery behind the words of the young Exorcist, no matter how hard he tried to. “...I didn’t think good Exorcists existed... You care about Mythics and demons for real, huh? You ain’t lying.”

“...I’d rather not get into it, but I kinda want to protect demons. Don’t tell my partner I said that, though, I really dunno how much I can trust humans.”

The demon laughed. “Aren’t you a human, though?”

“Yeah, I am, but I don’t know shit about them, haha.”

“...Haha, what? What kinda oddball are you? Just in whose care did I get put? Man, today’s wild, first I see a grown man scream like the shrillest kindergartener, and now I am face to face with an Exorcist who isn’t a full on dickhead!”

“Hey, better me than some human jerk who’d outright freaking smoked you, man.”

The two laughed, the atmosphere clearly more light than when Bastian was around. “...You looked and talked real stiff when dealing with your partner and the girl’s parents, but you are all loosened up now, it’s killing me. What’s up with that?”

Vinn chuckled nervously. “...I don’t know how to handle other humans too well, but demons are easy. You can just speak your mind, you know? No need to watch your words, ‘cause they understand you. Let’s get looking for your job, though, the sooner we are done with this, the better for the two of us.”

The demon and the Exorcist nodded, and off they went to the business district, but unknown to them, a pair of magenta eyes was fixed on them, having been watching them for a while now. Silent like the shadow of a ghost, the silhouette moved out, tailing them in secret.

                                                        ——-

“So, Mathanac, whatcha good at?”

And the first question was like a well placed hook right into the demon’s ribs. “...Ya think I’d be out here possessing children if I was good at anything?” 

“I’m asking what is you primary emotion. Demons are fundamentally emotional people, and there’s usually a main temperament to you from the moment you are born. We should start by picking something suited to your temperament.” advised Vinn, adjusting his coat and checking his phone. “I mean, it’d be stupid going to random places, hoping you’ll hit it off by coincidence, yeah? It’s better if we can reduce our options.”

Mathanac’s shoulders slumped and he let out a sigh. “I truly have no idea. My parents got... Smoked by Exorcists when I was a baby, apparently, and as soon as I could start possessing people, the family that had me ‘till then sent me on my way. Never really had the talk with anyone that could’ve helped me figure this out.”

There was a moment of silence between the two men, with Vinn unsure of what to respond with when faced with this rather grim turn of events. “...Sorry to hear that, man. I, uh... Damn, sorry, I really don’t know what to say, I don’t want to patronize you, either.” The answer to Vinn’s condolences was a forced chuckle.

“Don’t worry too much. My parents were apparently pretty damn vile, so it was inevitable. That’s also why I never really do any harm to whoever I possess, I mean, if these two dedicated demons got smoked in the end, someone far weaker like me would get pulverized in no time if I were to lay one finger on anybody. I’m a coward by nature, so I’d rather not sign my own death warrant if I can help it.”

“That doesn’t make you a coward, but jeez, alright, I guess our only option is to go to random places and try it out. Alright, so, how do you feel about the food industry?”

The demon boy raised his hand. “Question! I meant to ask this before, but how are you gonna get me a job just like that?”

Pulling out his MAB-issued notepad from his breast pocket, the young Exorcist flipped it open and showed a list of names and addresses to the inquiring demon. “This is a list of places where, if we mention who we are, we’ll be given freedom to get you hooked with a job as part of our parole officer duty. These are mostly Mundane-owned places, but they know of Mythics and such.”

The MAB has many connections, even with people outside the world of Mythics. Even though the majority of people in Stroln are Mundane -- that is, humans that are not users of any sort of sorcery or sacrament -- some Mundanes do indeed know of the world of Mythics that lies hidden under the surface of the expansive city for this or that reason. Generally, these Mundanes are visited by the nice, cordial chaps of the MAB, who politely request, without any sort of threats or implied violence, of course, that they sign a Non-Disclosure Agreement that, if breached, can result in red stains on the carpet. These NDAs contain pretty severe restrictions, but these can be lessened through various means, one of which is agreeing to participate in the MAB Parole System, which allows Exorcists get jobs for their assigned Mythics, no questions asked.

“So that system is actually real? I had heard some people talk about it before, but I assumed it was just bluster.” exclaimed Mathanac in marvel. “Yeah, let’s go for a bite.”

“You’ll be the one cooking, smartass.”

Not ten minutes later, Vinn introduced himself to the owner of a small diner, and got the owner to give Mathanac a trial day immediately upon mentioning the MAB. Though not comfortable with the clear fear in the owner’s eyes upon hearing the acronym, it was a step forward for Mathanac’s rehabilitation.

“...Jeez, never thought the day would actually come...” the owner lamented as he opened a ledger and wrote some stuff.

“Pardon?” inquired Vinn. “How come you never thought the day would come if you are a part of the MAB Parole System? If you signed up for it, it is at least expected that you consider the possibility.”

“Eh. Everyone signs up for that for the benefits, since no one actually makes use of it. It’s the first time in years an Exorcist comes and brings it up, and the previous time it was brought up was when I was asked if I wanted to sign up for it. Just my luck...”

“...Please excuse me.” Stroln’s beauty and hospitality never ceases to impress.

                                                       ——-

“Alright, you get to wait some tables today. Play nice and you can keep the job.” explained the young Exorcist as he sat by the counter. “I gotta watch you and review your performance, so just do your best. The owner says he wouldn’t mind a mild demon like you on the payroll, plus, you got your looks going for you, which always helps in the service industry.”

“Alright, it’s worth a shot. It’s just knowing what each person wants and delivering it, right? Yeah, easy peasy, got this in the bag, dontcha worry!” Mathanac boasted, getting changed into the diner’s uniform and apron already.

The door’s bell chimed, and in strode a new customer, almost too conveniently, just in time for Mathanac to test his waiting mettle. The customer was quite the sight, as well, with striking magenta eyes, a head full of shoulder length white hair with her right lock dyed black, and most notably, a lilac t-shirt that exposed her left shoulder, albeit it wasn’t due to the shirt being designed with that in mind, but rather, it was too big for her. This would usually call attention by itself, but the most curious aspect of the t-shirt was the large ink stain on the front, clearly not part of the original article, which contrasted not too pleasantly with the lilac color of the clothes. With a smile and a joyful stride, she sat on a chair, looked at the menu briefly, and then looked at the Exorcist with expectant magenta eyes.

“Oi, on table 17, go get her order, man.” chided Vinn, prompting the demon to make his debut in the food industry. As he watched the demon and the girl talk, the Exorcist checked his phone and texted Bastian.

                                                                        Is the interview going well?

marvelous shes a dumbass but shes the real deal no doubt

                                                                       Mathanac is starting with his job                                                                        and he’s a pretty decent demon                                                                        so I don’t think this will be hard.

cool im glad youre calling him by name can’t stay on the phone much longer don’t get cocky though keep an eye on him                                                                        Alright, mom.

There was nothing for Vinn to worry about! In the time spent texting with Bastian, Vinn had been keeping an eye on his demon: Mathanac had taken the order, brought the seasoning and sauces, the girl’s drink, the whole deal. Why, just now, he had set down the noodle soup she had ordered! No problem, no dilemma, it was in the bag. Right up until she wanted to put some salt on the soup and the cap fell off, dumping a mountain of tiny white rocks on the noodle soup, accentuated by the snickering of a certain demon, whose laughter immediately ceased upon receiving a powerful finger jab in the ribs.

“You were doing so well! Why the hell did you think this was a good time for a prank!?”

“Haaa, oww, haha... Man, come on, there’s no sin in adding some... Spice to a meal!”

Finger jab and a cry of pain that, if put through a translator, it would read “worth it”.

“Salt’s not even a spice, dumbass. Ma’am, I’m so sorry, we’ll get you a new bowl.”

“Oh, no no! No worries, hmhm, it was pretty funny, no worries! I’ll pay for it, too. I’d like it wrapped for take out, please.” replied the girl with a gentle demeanor and a pleasant smile as she stood up and got close to Vinn. “Actually... That guy’s a demon, isn’t he?”

Vinn took a step back, surprised. “...Guess you are not a Mundane.” The girl simply chuckled and lifted her arms in mock surrender, answering by just nodding. “Ah, no, sorry, didn’t mean to sound accusatory. Vinn Ingram, Exorcist with the Seventh Office of the MAB. I’m helping this guy get a job, but...”

“Oh? An Exorcist actually helping a Mythic? I see! And this is the part where I get careless, lower my guard, you ask for my papers and send me to jail over some little bit of bureaucracy, right?” she prattled.

“Ahh, no, look, I won’t--”

“Chill, I’m just kidding. I know that you are really helping that guy out. I saw you guys before. I miiiiiight have overheard you, and decided to follow you.” -- the girl stretched -- “You got a little careless, I guess!”

“Oh, she totally heard us, haha. Some Exorcist you are,” taunted Mathanac, coming back in his regular clothes and with the take out wrap. “The boss fired the crap outta me, so I guess this is a good time to go to the next place. Ah well, food biz ain’t my thing, anyways.”

The young Exorcist pinched the bridge of his nose. “Oh, easy for you to say... Well, we’ll get going then, and I’d appreciate it if you could keep this to yourself, miss...?”

“Oh no no, I won’t snitch on you, no worries! In fact, I’m of a mind to come along. This should be fun.”

“Yeah, no, I can’t let a civilian get involved in an MAB affa--”

“Oh, guess I’m snitching, after all. Seventh Office phone number... +56 9 762--”

“Welcome to the group! It’ll be our pleasure having you come with us! Please don’t get me flayed alive on my second day of work!”

“...Second day...” “...Pff... Second day...!”

The demon and the girl, who could figuratively be said to also be a demon, said this in unison, one voice with concern, the other with palpable hilarity.

“...L-let’s get going.”

                                                       ——-

The sky of Stroln turned pink behind the three young adults. Step after step, they would find a new place for Mathanac to work at. Step after step, Mathanac would do a prank and get fired. Step after step, the girl would laugh and Vinn could feel his hairline receding and his life becoming shorter. What he thought would be an easy job had turned out to be a nightmare. On top of the very building by the back alley where they had technically met for the first time, atop the billboard, the three sat, taking a short break, mostly for the sake of Vinn’s nerves.

Cracking open a can of beer, the young Exorcist sighed and drank half of it in one go. “...Haa... Mathanac, you are going to give me a god damn ulcer.”

“Ah, look!” the girl exclaimed, pointing at another billboard from their vantage point. The other billboard had burns and scratches that made it impossible to read or make out in the slightest. “A Pre-Amnesia billboard, huh? It’s a miracle that relic is still up.”

“Oh yeah, I thought the same thing yesterday. I think that one is the same I saw. I guess no one wants to foot the bill for that one when there’s this one here.”

“Hmm? Is it rare for that burned-up billboard to be up?” Mathanac asked, apparently out of the loop. “I mean, they could just clean it and reuse it, no?”

“Looks like our little unemployed prankster isn’t too cultured,” teased the girl. “Do you know what Pre-Amnesiac things are?”

“Oi, buzz off, I was busy trying to survive these years, not learn the lore of the world, nature, and all things that surround us, oh mighty scholar,” jested the demon, always in a good mood, despite having been fired from 14 jobs just today. “What’s that about?”

Vinn threw the now empty can and produced another from a plastic bag nearby. “You see those burn marks on the billboard? They aren’t actually burn marks. No matter what you do, you cannot remove, repair, or erase them. They cannot be affected at all. It’s unknown what caused those immutable marks, but whatever they hide, it’s as good as gone. That’s what happened to everything when the Amnesia hit.”

“Mmhm! Books, movies, videos, virtual text files, photos, audio tracks, billboards, even the washing instructions in clothing... It’s all gone. Not only did humanity lose its memories when the Amnesia hit, it lost almost everything that they had made or accomplished, too. 33 years ago, that was one hell of a show, I bet. Imagine coming by one day and not remembering a thing,” followed up the girl, a more solemn tone replacing her usual upbeat one.

Mathanac gasped. “...Woah, what? I had heard of some amnesomething stuff, but did it really hit the whole world? And it just erased everything? That’s nuts...”

“Not everything,” Vinn explained. “People forgot almost everything, and most information was outright gone and inaccessible, but not all. There’s many theories, but the most widely believed one is that the more something was recorded or known, the more it resisted the Amnesia. That’s why we know we are ‘humans’ and that you are a ‘demon’, for example, or how we still know how to make stuff like the concrete mix for buildings. Had we truly forgotten everything, we’d have gone back to something that was apparently named the Stone Age. In fact, the Amnesia wasn’t all encompassing: There’s entire groups of people dedicated to reconstructing Pre-Amnesia things, and they have been able to fully salvage books simply by finding enough copies of it and piecing together what isn’t covered in those burn marks.”

The girl clapped and cheered. “It’s just as the nerd said! So basically, it’s weird that that thing has been there for 33 whole years and no one’s cared enough to take it down. Some people are pretty sensitive about Pre-Amnesia paraphernalia, too, so I bet more than a couple of people have complained about it.” The clapping, however, caused the girl’s already loose t-shirt to shift even lower on her left shoulder, and Vinn’s eyes couldn’t help but react to said shift, only to find what seemed like a tattoo next to the girl’s shoulder blade. He couldn’t see it clearly, but it looked like a circular object wreathed in something spiky.

“Nice tattoo. What is it?”

“!” The girl immediately adjusted her t-shirt back and forced a laugh. “Ah, haha, you saw it. Yeah, um, it’s... Just some ink I got, just some tattoo, random impulse, really.”

“Cool acting. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” -- Vinn stood up after emptying his second can -- “More importantly, what the hell do we do about Math’s job?”

“...Mister Exorcist, you haven’t realized yet?”

Vinn looked at the girl with confused eyes. “Haven’t I realized what?”

“You’re going at this the wrong way. Your heart’s on the right place, I mean, if anyone had told me about an Exorcist that’s stuck by a demon through 14 disastrous jobs, I wouldn’t have believed it. Since you truly want to help this idiot, I’ll help. First, what has been the reason for his gold medal record in getting fired?”

The Exorcist scratched his chin. “He keeps making pranks. No matter the job, he keeps doing something mean but kinda funny, and that ends up getting him booted... Actually, now that I think about it, he was doing pranks on people when he had possessed the little girl, too.”

“What can I say? I like adding that extra oomph to stuff, man. It just ain’t me to do something serious.”

The girl had opened her mouth, but words were unnecessary when she noticed the young detective’s eyes, which were wide open, as if he had struck a realization. “...Seems you’ve realized it, Mister Exorcist! You were trying to fit a squ--”

“I was trying to fit a square peg in a round hole!” declared the young man, his vim returning, his eyes ablaze. “Mathanac, follow me, I want you to try something.”

“Huh. Sure thing, let’s do this.”

The three got off from the billboard, the sky already dark, but the day definitely not over, not just yet.

                                                      ——-

Mint Hill Street. Not a main street by any means, but one that does see a lot of pedestrian activity. Many shops, offices and apartments compose this hillside road, with busy people darting by and lo twenty four-seven. Today was a day like any other in this busy street, but with one main, loud, and colorful difference. Standing in the middle of a small crowd, a man in a bright red wig and a big red nose clamored to his loving audience. His oversized suspenders contained all sorts of artifacts of hilarity, and he seemed to be the one that had the most fun of them all, even if the audience was all smiles.

“Hmmm?” the colorful man expressed, upon noticing the not-so-smiling face of a little girl. “Why the long face, little fella? Did something happen?”

“Ahh... No, it’s nothing, Mister Clown, it’s just, the last few days I’ve been exhausted, as if something had been draining my energy... I’m feeling better now, but it was a couple of weird days, and I don’t remember much... B-but I am enjoying your show here!”

“Why, I feel like you are trying to bamboozle me! Trick me, even! With a face like that, you corner me, nay, force me to have to utilize one of my secret...” -- the clown exaggeratedly looked to both sides before coming close to the girl and muttering the rest -- “...one of my most secret techniques, just for you! Now, tell me, what’s your favorite animal?”

“I like cats!”

“The contract is sealed, little girl!”

The clown produced a balloon from his pants, inflated it, and began shaping it like a cat. “See,” the clown announced. “This fella’s name is Missifus, and he’s such a lovely cat! And he likes lovely little lasses that smile brightly! Now, where’s one such girl? Hmmm? I don’t see one...”

“Hehe! Me! Me!”

“Oh! Who are y-- N-no way! Are you the same little girl from just now!? What a radical change! Oh, this won’t do, this won’t do! See, Missifus loves girls who smile, but his family will get jealous if he leaves with someone with a smile this good!”

The little girl’s face was about to droop from the disappointment before the clown continued. “...That’s why they have decided that they will all come with you!”

In a flash, four other balloon cats of different colors appeared out of seemingly nowhere, crowding the happy girl with lots of cute balloons, which her parents helped hold as they all smiled in gratitude to the clown. The crowd cheered, and many coins and bills filled the outstretched blanket in the ground, where the audience was free to donate to the performer.

“Haha! I’m glad you enjoyed the show! Let’s call it a day for today, yes? See you around!” And with that, the clown packed his things and quickly left, disappearing into a back alley, where he removed his wig and nose, and came face to face with Vinn and the girl, who were cheering and clapping for him.

“I can’t believe I know a star! Please sign my shirt!” congratulated the girl, patting Mathanac’s shoulder. “No, but for real, that was pretty good! You sure it was your first time?”

“Eyup! Never done this before, but it felt so natural, and I feel so... Satisfied.”

“You gave one hell of a show, I’m impressed, man. You were the one having the most fun out there. So, it was the emotion of “laughter”, huh?” Vinn commented, writing on his notepad.

“It sure seems that way. I feel much better and more fulfilled than any time I’ve ever possessed anyone.”

“Demons can get sustenance in many ways, but the main and most effective way is to be exposed to the emotion that governs their being. So it makes sense that you would feel like you just had a feast from making so many people laugh. I take this to mean you won’t be possessing more people?”

The demon laughed and clicked his tongue. “No, sir, no more of that for me... And, Vinn? Thanks, man, for sticking with this idiocy for as long as you did. You had no reason to, but you did it. I swear I won’t cause any more trouble.”

“It’s incredible, isn’t it? Good Exorcists exist! Out of all the jokes I saw a literal clown make today, that one is the best one! Just quit that job and join Math as a clown already,” the girl jested and she playfully pocked Vinn in the ribs with her elbow.

“Jeez, I get it already... Man, it feels weird to be praised for just, like, not being a dick, haha. Well, that’s case closed, then. I gotta check in with you now and then, Math, since I am still technically your parole officer, so--”

“Yeah, no problem, dude, hit me up whenever, we can hang out or something.” interrupted the demon, having no problem with this arrangement at all. “I’ll be on busy streets like this one mostly. You can easily find me by looking for the tall guy with the massive red nose.”

The three laughed and then realized that it was already night. “Well, today was a pleasure, but I gotta get going. Nice to have met you, Mister Exorcist and Math! Best of luck!”

“Ah, wait! Thanks a lot for your help! I wouldn’t have made it without you!” Vinn quickly exclaimed.

“Damn right you wouldn’t, haha. Everyone has a role in this world, see? You just gotta figure out what it is, what’s that little something you are good at, and then, the road is easy. Well, see ya! I hope you help many more Mythics!” And with that, she was gone.

“...So what was her name, anyways?”

“Iunno. She never said. Well, Math, see you around.”

The city of Stroln was far from perfect. Crimes that affect both Humans and Mythics keep happening, unimpeded and shamelessly. Abuse of power is common, and in the end, you can only truly trust yourself and those close to you to keep you safe. But, today at least, Mint Hill Street was made a livelier place, thanks to a certain colorful man, and the man that helped him get there. 

Every wall starts with a brick, after all.

                                                      ——-

The large steel door covered in graffiti closed behind the lithe girl, who confidently stepped into the comfortable darkness, magenta eyes barely visible in the pitch blackness of this nondescript building. Far ahead, a little light finally could be seen, and near it, a man in red robes sat on a table, reading a book. The closer the girl got to the man, the stronger the scent of chamomile incense became. As she stepped out of the darkness and into the dull light, the man’s eyes turned to her, and he finally waved.

“Back late today, aren’t you?”

“Sorry! I kinda got distracted by something. It was an interesting day,” the girl explained, setting the take out wrap on the table.

The older man in the robes gestured for her to have a seat. On the table, two plates of hot food were ready to be feasted upon. “That’s great to hear! Tell me about it while we eat.”

The girl gasped and immediately took a seat. “Awww, Balthazar... You held off on dinner to wait for me? Thank you, ehehe...”

“Oh, it wasn’t much! So, tell me! You seem to be very happy.”

“Yeah! So, like, I came across an Exorcist cornering a demon in a back alley. I was ready to eviscerate him, when I noticed that he was actually helping him!”

The man’s eyes were wide open. “What, for real? Like, actually helping him? Hey, I’ve told you lying is pretty tasteless!”

“No no, for real! I couldn’t believe it either, but he was legitimately helping out the demon, so I joined them to see where it would go, and--”

“I see you two are enjoying a late dinner as usual.”

The elegant, feminine voice came from the shadows, from whence an alluring silhouette emerged. As soon as her words were heard, the white haired girl in the ink stained shirt held her tongue and looked away.

“...We are, Alkelda. Anything we can help you with?” said the man, quickly locking eyes with the elegant shadow.

“Four days from now, we’ll be conducting our experiment. I assume you know what this means, right?”

“Yup. You need your test subjects soon, right? Don’t worry, we already have it scheduled. We’re planning on getting them tomorrow, so relax. We are ahead of schedule.”

“Oh? My, it pleases me how efficient you and your... Partner are, Balthazar. I assume it’s just you two, as usual?”

“Yup. We’ll be going out to get them tomorrow. We’ll bring them here, so have the pens ready to receive them.”

“Mhmhmhm... Excellent. Well, enjoy your meal, Balthazar and Sacrifice. You have a busy day tomorrow, from what I can tell.” As fast as she came, the silhouette was gone.

If disgust had a shape, it definitely was the girl’s face right now. “...Can’t get used to that bitch...”. The man simply laughed at that comment.

“Just go to bed, and take it easy. It’s all in the name of clarity. We’re almost there, we can’t let personal grievances get in the way so far in the game.”

“Yes, it’s all in the name of clarity... Yes! Indeed! Yes! You are right! See you tomorrow Balthazar. Thanks for having dinner with me!”

The girl hurried to her room, and locked the door behind her. 

“...Everyone has a role in this world, see? You just gotta figure out what it is, what’s that little something you are good at, and then, the road is easy...”

Red robes that matched those that the man wore hung from a rack, beneath a large, realistic, almost grotesque full-head mask of a pig.

“...For some, that role is that of an entertainer that gifts laughs to those around them. This is admirable.”

A small jar of a bright liquid sat on the dilapidated desk opposite to her bed.

“...For some, that role is that of a seed of hope among a rotten crop, doing what they should, and yet, they don’t. This is admirable.”

A long baseball bat, inscribed with runes, leaned against the wall, next to the robes.

“...For some, that role is that of the ultimate sacrifice that will save all, in the name of clarity...”

A slender, pale finger ran across the repulsive mask.

“...This is admirable.”

    Of kindred spirits, ink stains, and the reassuring caress of purpose:                                 – Chapter 2: "Exorcist” Is A Strong Word –                                                        End  

                                           To be continued in Chapter 3: Neon War Paint.